Nasty Issue

BUZZSAW APRIL 2015 VOMITROCIOUS

Debunking Germophobia pg. 22

Review of Nasty Drinks pg. 31

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News & Views

Unionizing in the Age of Adjuncts pg. 12

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Buzzsaw presents...

EDITORS’ COMMENT

The Nasty Issue

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Buzzsaw is published with support from Generation Progress / Center for American Progress (online at GenProgress.org).

Buzzsaw is also funded by the Ithaca College Student Government Association and the Park School of Communications.

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

Vanguard Printing is our press. (Ithaca, N.Y.)

Divider and Table of Contents photography

By Matthew Colgan Matthew Colgan is a senior sociology major and used to be a documentary studies major. He has always found a connection with portrait photography, with a concentration in documentary.

He has always found that a person’s eyes can be the most interesting part of a picture. Eyes are how most people perceive life, and it always has interested him that each one of these is unique. He likes to capture the most natural response possible; most of the time he prefers the subject of the photo to not even know that are in the photo.

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Buzzsaw uses student-generated art and photography and royalty-free images.

Views expressed in this magazine are not necessarily those of the editorial staff or of Ithaca College.

Feedback and contributions should be sent to buzzsawmag@gmail.com.

Front and back cover art by Lizzie Cox Center spread art by Kaley Belval

Write Us Our magazine exists to inspire thoughtful debate and open up the channels through which information is shared. Your comments and feedback are all a part of this process. Reach the editors by email at: buzzsawmag@gmail.com

Seesaw ..........................................................6 News & Views .................................................7

Upfront .......................................................16 Ministry.of.Cool ........................................30 Prose & Cons ............................................39

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buzzcuts

Recycling & Compost Information in Tompkins County Tompkins County has set a goal of waste diversion by 2016.

Food scraps recycling drop-spots: Recycling & Solid Waste Center 160 Commercial Ave., Ithaca, New York Open Monday to Saturday from 7 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.

Cayuga Compost 3225 Agard Rd., Trumansburg, New York Open 24 hours a day Dryden Town Highway Department 61 E. Main Street (Rt. 392), Dryden, New York Open every Saturday from 9 a.m. to Noon

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

Cornell Cooperative Extension 615 Willow Ave., Ithaca, New York Open every Sunday from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

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2405 N. Triphammer Rd., Lansing, New York Open every Saturday from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m.

What’s Accepted: Bread, grains and beans Compostable disposables Eggs and dairy Fruits and vegetables Paper napkins and cups What’s Not Accepted: Diapers Glass Metal Pet waste Plastic

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News & Views

www.buzzsawmag.org/seesaw/

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The Sacred Root Kava Bar, located at 139 West State Street, sells herbal teas, kava, as well as raw, glutenscreenings, concerts and workshops. This photo slideshow displays the artwork, drinks and desserts found at Sacred Root, in collaboration with the magazine’s center spread.

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

Making the mundane interesting is no small feat.

Ithaca students use photography as a way of seeing something new in the ordinary.

www.buzzsawmag.org/seesaw/

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Money, On Top of More Money Why the fuck did this happen?

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Granted, I knew what I was getting myself into when I decided to come here, but I also didn’t sign up to give more money to the college than I had to.

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Vaccination Rates Below Average

Low rates and national outbreak lead to debate about vaccine requirements Evan Popp, Staff Writer -

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Dissolving Illusions: Disease, Vaccines, and The Forgotten History

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“I think that it comes down to one of our constitutional rights to decide what goes in our body, and we shouldn’t be pressured.There is no such thing as informed consent without being able to say no to a medical procedure.”

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“It’s easy to say ‘My child is healthy, I’m going to only feed them organic produce and I’m not going to allow them to get immunizations,’” he said. “It’s sort of a naturalist movement in a way. Feeling that whatever’s natural is best.”

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*Name has been changed to protect anonymity. ____________________________________ Evan Popp is a freshman journalism major who tries to use his fear of needles to get out of being vaccinated.

You can email him at epopp@ithaca. edu.

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Mixed Ideas About Commons Reconstruction Skepticism remains on success of the construction project

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____________________________________ Kellen Beck is a junior journalism major who is ready to throw on a hard hat himself to get the Commons done quicker. You can email him at kbeck1@ithaca.edu.

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Unionizing in the Age of Adjuncts

Part-time professors nationwide seek improved working conditions Jessica Corbett, Upfront Editor

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More reliable contracts, increased wages

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concerns for adjuncts unionizing across the country, but particularly pressing for those located in areas with high costs of living.

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___________________________________ Jessica Corbett is a senior journalism major. You can email her at jcorbet2@ ithaca.edu.

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The Nation

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Decent Exposure

How early contact with germs gives kids’ immune systems a boost

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___________________________________ Amanda Hutchinson is a senior journalism major who wants you to send your kids out into the world. You can email her at ahutchi2@ithaca.edu.

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BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

PFRONT. UPFRONT. UPFRON

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Selected dis-education of the month.

A Mother’s Milk

Exposing the public’s fear of breastfeeding

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Charlotte Robertson, Staff Writer eventy-nine point two percent of women breastfeed their children for some period of time, while more than 40 percent of women breastfeed their children

according to a 2011 survey conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. These statistics imply women are breastfeeding children; however, breastfeeding remains something largely unseen in public places.

Despite the prevalence of breastfeeding, it is not socially acceptable to breastfeed in public places, which has lead to hostile environments for women breaking this cultural norm.

Adrienne Pine, professor of anthropology at American University, became an internet controversy in 2012 after breastfeeding her sick child in front of students during a feminist anthropology lecture.

The situation sparked on-campus debate, with students questioning if Pine’s actions were “natural” or “unprofessional.”

In response to the incident, Pine wrote an online article, “The Dialectics of Breastfeeding on Campus: Exposéing My Breasts on the Internet,” which was published in CounterPunch in September 2012.

“So here’s the story, internet: I fed my sick baby during feminist anthropology class without disrupting the lecture so

mothers to breastfeed unless they have a medical condition that doesn’t make breastfeeding feasible.

For example, mothers on Women, Infants, and Children, frequently referred to as WIC, a supplemental nutrition program for women, infants, and children, receive more food and get free breastfeeding support when they breastfeed their babies. In addition, the American Academy of Pediatrics now recommends breastfeeding for a full year.

Martucci said now most women who receive prenatal care in this country are educated about breastfeeding and, now, breastfeeding is considered a basic part of childbirth education classes.

She said she believes public breastfeeding should be considered acceptable, especially because health organizations and the general pubic tell mothers it is the healthiest way to feed their babies.

“If the state and society are going to tell mothers that the best way to feed their babies is by breastfeeding, then not allowing women to breastfeed in public is basically telling mothers that they are not allowed to participate in public life,” Martucci said.

She said breastfeeding can prove to be more convenient because there is no need to prepare formula.

However, she said soImage by Claire McClusky cietal drawbacks continshifted in such a way that a lively heterosexual marital sex life became an es“Alternatively, women who breastfeed sential part of a happy marriage, and by must negotiate a society and a body extension, a happy nuclear family.” politic that still does not afford women Martucci also said breastfeeding is equality with men, and mothers often now becoming an almost mandatory bear the brunt of this inequality,” Marcondition of motherhood. tucci said. “In the case of breastfeeding, “I would argue that today the expected norm is to breastfeed at all costs to sleep, time, money and personal wellbeing in order to breastfeed a child.” months,” Martucci said. ______________________________________ It is actually harder for a woman to Charlotte Robertson is a freshman intechoose not to breastfeed today, Martuc- grated marketing and communications ci said, because it is so pushed by the major who isn’t afraid of nipples. You healthcare system. There is pressure on can email her at crobertson@ithaca.edu.

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of class,” Pine wrote. “I doubt anyone saw my nipple, because I’m pretty good at covering it. But if they did, they now know that I too, a university professor, like them, have nipples.”

Pine’s article questioned the underlying assumption that breasts and nipples are sexual and rejected the notion that breastfeeding in public should be a newsworthy event.

Jessica Martucci, assistant professor at Mississippi State University, researches women’s health history.

Martucci said she believes breasts are sexualized within American culture, which contributes to the stigma of breastfeeding.

“Since at least the 1940s, and arguably for the majority of the modern era, there has been discomfort in American society over the dual nature of the female breast as both a source of nourishment and an object of sexual desire,” Martucci said.

Martucci said this relationship between the “sexual breast” and the “nourishing, maternal breast” is that the sexualization of female breasts picked up around the same time that the movement toward breastfeeding started to return. ry, breastfeeding rates fell,” she said. “By the 1940s, small pockets of educated, white, middle-class mothers began advocating for breastfeeding, and by 1956 zation, La Leche League, had formed.

The WWII and post-war years, however, were also the years when sexual norms

What Happens to Dead Bodies Exploring modern postmortem practices in the U.S.

Jamie Swinnerton, Staff Writer

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

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he only thing that is certain in this life is that it is going to end.

Death is a fate that we all must eventually meet. Death has no thoughts for our great accomplishments, acquired wealth or the immeasurable love we feel for others. In the end it is the great equalizer. But the dead cannot wax poetic or philosophize about their eventual spiritual home. What a body does after it has died is what all organic things do, it biologically breaks down and, in time, rots.

After a human body dies it goes through a process of decay often referred to as decomposition. All of the cellular functions stop, and the trillions of microscopic organisms still living in your body begin to eat away at the tissue, Caitlin Doughty, a licensed mortician and host of the Youtube channel Ask a Mortician, said. As these microscopic organisms eat away at what was once your limbs, they produce gas, which makes the body bloat and turn a greenish tint. This is called putrefaction.

“Tissues begin to liquefy and the skin blackens,” Doughty explained in episode six, using a felt cut out of herself as a visual model of the physical changes. “Since [it’s] outside, bugs are coming from the soil too.

And maggots. Oh how there shall be maggots!” Doughty exclaims. From there the bugs and maggots do what they do best and eat away the skin.

The rate of decomposition depends on the environment that a body is in.

“The colder the environment is, the longer the process will take. And the warmer the environment is, the more rapidly decomposition will occur,” Dr. Gregory Hess, forensic pathologist and chief medical examiner at the Pima county medical examiner’s But temperature is hardly the only tion. “If you have a person that’s in

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the water, sometimes you’ll have what’s called adipocere, where you get kind of a mold growth,” Hess explained. But if the body is in a very occur, leaving the skin hard and leathery. In humid climates, what is known as skin slippage begins earlier. The hair, skin and nails loosen and begin to fall off, exposing the muscle and fat underneath. If a body is found while at this stage, the skin around the hand can be taken off and worn like a glove in order to After several weeks of the decomposition process, all that is left is bone and hair. Whatever the bugs didn’t want. Under two months is the “standard issue rate of decomposition,” Doughty explains in her video. But in this day and age it is far less likely that a body will be left to rot out in the wild than it is for someone to die in a hospital, followed by a funeral ceremony or cremation.

Heart disease is the number one killer of both men and women in the United States, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention website. Approximately onequarter of deaths annually are due to heart disease. Likely, these people were taking medication or being monitored by a doctor for their heart condition. In these cases, when they die there are ample medical records indicating that they died of natural causes and the doctor can issue a In cases of non-natural deaths, like homicide, suicide, motor vehicle accidents, overdoses, or if someone dies suddenly and unexpectedly, the local medical examiner will be called in to inspect the remains. All nonthe medical examiner. As Hess explained, when law enforcement is called about a dead body, its forensic team will conduct its own inves“If they believe a crime was oc-

curred, they will proceed based on their procedures and training. Then you get into all of the stuff you see on TV, with CSI and all this other nonsense,” Hess said.

After the preliminary investigation, an inspection team from the mediits own “mini investigation.” Unlike law enforcement, the representatives aren’t looking for evidence of a crime.

“It’s a little bit more focused on medical conditions, and cause of death, and doesn’t have anything to do with whether a crime has occurred,” Hess said.

From there, in order to certify the death, the remains must be transported to the medical examiner’s happens in that examination depends on what was collected during the examination at the scene, and if there are any medical records for the deceased.

Legally, determining the cause of death takes precedent over any preferences the family may have for the handling of the remains. There are a number of things Hess might performing cultures, looking at tiscer or other abnormalities, sending blood samples to a toxicology lab or deceased’s medical records will be reviewed for clues as to what might have caused their demise.

Once cause of death has been concremate or bury a body without a ily of the deceased has likely been found and contacted and have made arrangements with a funeral home.

This is where a mortician becomes involved. The funeral home that has been contracted to carry out the deceased’s wishes will come pick up the body from the medical examin-

their facility to be embalmed or bring it to a cremation facility. In New York State, a crematory must be licensed with a funeral home.

Thomas Fuller is a licensed funeral director, and manager of Herson Wagner Funeral Home in Ithaca, New York. His main job is preparing the body for whatever arrangements have been made. If the family has chosen cremation there isn’t much that needs to be done. If the deceased had a pacemaker, that would need to be removed for fear of it exploding. Depending on if the family had a chance to see the deceased by the time they were brought to the funeral home, Fuller might arrange a viewing for them. In this case, even if the deceased will be cremated, they will be cleaned up and laid out, with a sheet or blanket covering everything but their face. The eyes will be closed and the mouth will be shut.

Before they are cremated or buried, the family.

Embalming, which helps preserve the remains and slow down decomposition, is Fuller’s specialty. aldehyde, he or she is undressed and given a sponge bath, washed with a disinfectant soap and his or her hair is shampooed. If rigor mortis has set in, the limbs are gently ever been to a funeral with a viewing, you’ll know that the arms are crossed over the body, placed there Fuller said what most people don’t notice is the head is usually turned slightly to the right.

“Embalming is just basically refectants,” Fuller explained. In order

If the family opts for cremation, the funeral home will put the body in what Fuller called a “cremation container.” Usually this is as simple as a cardboard box, and transport it to the crematorium. Depending on the size of the body, it usually takes about four hours to fully cremate human remains.

In episode two of Ask a Mortician, Doughty explained what happens to the pieces of bone still left over after a body is cremated. “When we cremate a human body, all of the organic material that makes up a person is burned off, and what you’re left with is just the inorganic skeleton,” she explained. When a family chooses cremation it expects to reand some chunks of bone. After the bones are pulled out of the crematory oven, usually referred to as a retort, they are put in a processor, also known as a cremulator. “It’s essentially kind of a bone blender,” Doughty told her watchers.

After you die your body will begin to decompose, because that’s simply what bodies do. They’re dependable like that. Embalming can slow down the process, but only for so long.

Before a body is cremated, or buried six feet under, it still begins the process of breaking down. Even your ashes are just a physical representation of something that no longer exists. Your soul, if you believe in those, has as many options as there are religions. Your body has one: become nothing. Because that’s just what happens to a body after it dies. ___________________________________ Jamie Swinnerton is a senior journalism major who spends her spare time in graveyards. You can email her at jswinne1@ithaca.edu.

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sion is made at the base of the neck.

A centrifugal pump is used to pump the chemicals in and the blood out.

“Formaldehyde is a gas,” Fuller said. “You’re basically distributing the gas through the arterial system.

As it moves through the capillaries, the formaldehyde gas escapes through the capillary walls into the

tissue.” When the gas enters the tissue it kills the bacteria that is there and locks the proteins in, which is why the skin of an embalmed body

Go with the Flow

Challenging the stigmatization of menstruation

Celisa Calacal, Staff Writer

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Health, a project of the U.S. Department of Human Health and Services, woman’s monthly bleed-

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

simple mention of “menstruation” and “period” is often enough to elicit various reactions of disgust in public settings.

Similar to the ways in which unfavorable attitudes have been maintained against other marginalized groups in society, the constant perpetration of the negative perceptions toward menstruation stems from various interpersonal and institutional levels, Cathleen Anne Power, service learning coordinator in the gender studies department at the University of Utah, said.

“It comes from various institutions. It comes from media institutions that communicate negative messages about menstruation and about women’s bodies in general,” she said. “I think we live in a culture that is not set up around girls’ or women’s needs.”

Power was one of four researchers who published the 2002 study “‘Feminine Protection: The Effects of Menstruation on Attitudes Towards Women” in Psychology of Women Quarterly.

According to the study, the taboo to meticulously hide evidence of their menstrual cycle, such as hiding pads or tampons in disguised packages or using euphemisms to mask discussion about menstruation. For instance, many women choose to avoid using the terms “menstruation” or even the more socially acceptable term “period” in everyday conversation. The study also found that in addition to having to shield evidence of by a strong societal stigma against menstruation to not discuss the topic in public or with men.

In the Feminine Protection survey, researchers conducted an experiment testing the hypothesis that evidence of a woman’s menstrual status results in negative reactions to her, as well as increased

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experiment involved 65 university students — 32 females and 33 males — who interacted with a woman who accidentally dropped either a tampon or a hair clip out of her handbag.

The results showed participants in the tampon scenario reacted negatively to their female partner, viewing her as less competent, less likeable, and were more physically and psychologically avoided compared with a woman who dropped a hair clip. These reactions suggest feelings of disgust and discomfort surrounding menses. Participants in the tampon condition generally placed greater importance on a woman’s physical appearance.

According to the study, “individuals who subscribe most strongly to cultural gender role stereotypes would be more likely to engage in ‘feminine protection’ by responding to menstruation with an — that is, clinging to a more sanitized, deodorized, and culturally idealized view of women’s bodies.”

The stigma of menstruation can be fueled by the belief that women who are on their periods are impure, unclean or dirty. The foundation of these conceptions lies in traditional social constructions regarding a woman’s sexuality, often fueled by religious and cultural beliefs. The negative attitudes toward menstruation, Power said, stem from perceptions of women that devalue the female body.

“We prefer women’s bodies as objects that are there for the viewing pleasure of men and not as bodies that function for sort of physical bodily function for women gets devalued,” she said.

According to Aru Bhartiya’s 2013 study “Menstruation, Religion and Society,” published in the International Journal of Social Science and Humanity, all major world religions have placed restrictions on menstruating women and frequently refer to them as “ritually unclean.” For instance, Halakha, the Jewish code of law, prohibits any type of physical contact between males and females during a woman’s menstrual cycle. Menstruation is also considered unclean in the Eastern

Orthodox Christian Church.

Although laws such as these are typically no longer strictly followed today, they have greatly contributed to the stigmatization of menstruation. The discomyoung girls to feel shame or embarrassment about being on their period, despite it being a natural female biological process.

From the results of her study, Bhartiya found when participants received the questionnaire, 70 percent of the women, aged 20 to 25, read and giggled about the topic, and 50 percent of those who reacted this way simply refused to complete the survey.

For young girls experiencing menstruwhich they obtain knowledge from about Bhartiya’s study showed 41 percent of women learned about menstruation aftime. Lacking the proper information beforehand to deal with the process can breed shame and lead to misconceptions.

A 1994 study by Janet Lee, “Menarche and the (Hetero)Sexualization of the Female Body,” addressed the issue of staining and how it becomes a visible emblem of women’s contamination and shame.

Lee further discussed how staining contradicts the cultural ideal for women to conceal any evidence of menstruation.

The negative perception of menses also stems from the expectation for women to remain clean, Lee claimed. The negative connotations behind revealing the existence of one’s period prompts fear within women of facing humiliation, thus it breaks the socially constructed ideals of impeccable cleanliness and beauty.

The researchers in the Feminine Protection study claimed patriarchal culseparates her from a man. The blatant difference in a reproductive system between men and women and the bodily functions associated with the system symbolize women’s inferiority, they said.

The results of the study support the idea that any reminders of menstruation lead to primarily negative reactions because

they emphasize a primary difference between men and women.

Jamie Goldenberg, psychology professor at the University of South Florida, contributed to the Feminine Protection study by applying the perceptions surrounding menstruation to her terror management theory.

Goldenberg, explaining terror management theory, said: “We defend against the threat associated with the awareness of mortality by clinging to symbolic cultural construction and so much of this uniquely human defense has to do with separating ourselves from other animals and making the body symbolic… Menstruation is something that is very creaturely, very much of the body.”

With the association to blood as a sign of mortality, Goldenberg said women’s concerns and fears surrounding menstruation stem from its physicality and its association with disgust.

“I think they stem from two levels: one level we’re kind of taught that in society that attitudes about menstruation are very secretive and you have to keep it private and concealed,” Goldenberg said.

“My other research on terror management theory and kind of the existential approach suggests that these norms about the body and transforming the body, and concealing things that are very physical and creaturely stem from the need to distance ourselves from mortality and the association with other animals who clearly die.”

In Bhartiya’s survey, 62 percent of women said they did not feel comfortable discussing menstruation because it may cause them to feel uncomfortable. These results support the idea that while many women are able to discuss menstruation in a private setting with other women, oftentimes the topic is wholly avoided in mixed gender conversations.

In Goldenberg’s recent research, she

menses, according to the 2005 Menstruation and Menstrual Suppression Survey conducted by researchers Anna Greenberg and Jennifer Berktold, 70 percent of women aged 18 to 40 were not embarrassed in having to purchase feminine hygiene products such as pads or tampons, and 41 percent of women did not feel embarrassed to openly talk about their period.

The survey further showcases how most women simply view menstruation as a nuisance, with 77 percent of women agreeing with the idea that menstruation is a process they must deal with. In addition, 74 percent of women reported they believed men have an advantage in not going through the monthly experience of having a period. The survey results believe menstruation puts women at a disadvantage in society amongst male counterparts.

The stigmatization of menstruation is further perpetuated by the advertising industry through its portrayal of feminine hygiene products. In the 1999 research study, “Adolescence, Advertising and the Ideology of Menstruation,” researcher Debra Merskin said, “Ideology, thereby, has to do with the tools of a social system (language, imagery, institutions) that beliefs among the masses and reinforce their subordinate place in the social system.”

Since advertisements attempt to elicit appeal by relying upon the ideology of popular culture, the strategies involved in marketing products such as tampons and pads relies on the expectation of cleanliness and purity associated with female sexuality. For instance, Merskin’s pointed out the frequency in which

it’s the antithesis of the reproductive functioning of the body,” she said. “By turning the body into an object and putting focus on appearance, you can conceal some of the threat associated with menstruation.

I think talking about it with men — wanting to appear attractive — it might kind of seem like the opposite of being desirable and attractive.”

Despite society’s antipathy toward

feminine pads attempt to support the effectiveness of their product by demonstrating the absorption rate, oftentimes in commercials, the blood associated with periods is replaced with blue liquid.

Merksin’s research study analyzed the content of 94 feminine hygiene advertisements in Seventeen and Teen magazines from 1987 to 1997 to answer and evaluate the question, “Do advertisements that

the subsequent relegation of girls and women to a private space,” Merskin said in the study. “As a social construction, femininity involves the cultivation of a body that does not leak.”

The reaction of disgust toward menstruation and women’s bodies, Power titudes toward marginalized groups.

“We have not just a physiological disgust but a social disgust, and you’ll notice that whenever a group is marginalized disgust is one of the ways in which their lower status is maintained,” she said. “We ginalization.” holds the marginalized status of women in today’s society. Menstruation is a natural biological process and should not be treated as an unnatural anomaly.

Period. _______________________________________ Celisa Calacal is a freshman journalism major who purchases her tampons with pride. You can email her at ccalacal@ ithaca.edu.

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and the desire to look attractive rationalizes why women often refuse to discuss menstruation with their male peers.

feminine hygiene products to symbolize freshness and delicacy. In addition, the mere names of these products serve as reassurance to girls and women against the burdens of menstruation, such as Always and Stayfree.

target girls perpetuate or dispel myths and taboos associated with menstruation?’’

Eighty-three percent of the textual goals — the advertisement’s text, content and tone — mentioned most often encompassed fear and uncertainty, speuct risk. In addition, 38 percent of the advertisements communicated secrecy.

Furthermore, 94 percent of the context of the advertisements centered on a woman being discovered she is menstruating by her peers, playing upon the embarrassment and shame factor.

The results of the study support the idea that advertisements for feminine hygiene products market the same common goal of successfully hiding a woman’s menstrual cycle through different ways, all to help the menstruating woman avoid embarrassment and shame at the hands of society. Furthermore, with menstruation acting as a symbol for a woman’s femininity, the expectation to hide one’s cycle suggests that the impurity of femininity should be kept from the public eye.

“The current array of feminine hygiene advertisements targeted toward adolescent girls does serve to reinforce an ideol-

Debunking Germophobia

Microbiology research improves public understanding of health and history

Amanda Hutchinson, Staff Writer

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BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

acteria are everywhere: our bathrooms, our kitchens, our cell phones and ourselves. Due to the association between these “bugs” and illness, a lot of our cleaning protocols and products are designed to reduce or kill the bacteria present on these surfaces. However, studying which bacteria occupy a given space, including space itself, can provide valuable information on the health, history and demographics of an area. Microbiome surveys, such as the New York-based PathoMap project, aim to give our bacterial neighbors their due.

Microbiome surveys take samples bacteria are present and in what quantities and ratios. To date, most of these have been done in environmental and medical contexts. For example, an article on Motherboard at the beginning of March 2015 explored the vaginome and how the collection of bacteria housed in the vagina has been linked to a variety of health topics, including how often a woman gets a urinary tract infection or the immune system risks of babies born via C-section. Another article from Mother Jones in November investigated the role of bacteria and fungi in plant function, pointing out that “the very plant-ness of plants” (photosynthesis) comes from an old symbiotic relationship between plants and microbes that could convert solar energy into chemical energy.

Greater surveys have attempted to tackle the microbiomes of entire ecosystems ranging from the human body, inside and out, to the ocean “ludicrous and not feasible,” the entire planet. This last one, the Earth Microbiome Project, began in 2010 to gather existing microbial samples from various environments around the world into one database for comparison.

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Until recently, however, most surveys have glanced over the environment in which we spend the most time: inside. Several studies and subsequent ad campaigns show just how “dirty” common surfaces like doorknobs and phones are, but the buildings we occupy (known in the microbiology world as the built environment) also have an established set of bacteria. This set of bacteria changes depending on who is in the space and for how long, and the building materials, including paint and HVAC systems, can change how quickly the building microbiome shifts in response to the new people. veys have been conducted in the built environment, including the Hospital Microbiome Project based out of the University of Chicago and the Home Microbiome Study. Many microbiome surveys share researchers to provide a more collaborative approach to understanding the microbial situation from site to site, and most are part of the Microbiome of the Built Environment Network (microBEnet for short).

MicroBEnet is a project funded by the Alfred P. Sloan Foundation to study and better understand the microbial makeup of the indoor environment from homes and hospiThe project also connects these researchers with each other, researchpublic to spread awareness of the indoor microbiome, as well as biology in general. David Coil, a project scientist at the University of California, Davis, and a member of the project, said the program started because the Sloan Foundation was interested in biodefense.

“They wanted to develop sensors so that you could go into a building and see if a bioterrorism event is taking place, but what they discovered is that actually we didn’t know anything about what is in buildings,” Coil said. “We spend 90 percent of

our time indoors, and we knew more about what lived in a deep-sea ocean vent than about what’s in the averSubway systems are part of the built microbiome in large cities, and researchers at the Weill Cornell Medical College in New York City recently published their PathoMap study, which took samples at various subway stations around the city kinds of bacteria and DNA found.

Ebrahim Afshinnekoo, co-lead author on the study, said the subway system was the perfect example of the universal feeling of touching a surface and questioning how dirty that surface was, but the idea was largely uninvestigated.

“What we really wanted to do was create this baseline, see what is on these surfaces, what communities are present, and now that we’ve done that, it opens up doors to interesting ways to take this data and take it further,” Afshinnekoo said.

The survey, which included almost 1,500 samples from 466 stations, of bacteria, viruses, animals, plants and other organisms. About half of teria, most of which are the kinds found on human skin; one subway station that had been closed due had traces of bacteria that were only known in Antarctica.

Other organismal DNA found included various insects and rodents found in the subway system, humans and various kinds of vegetables; cucumber DNA occurrences actually outnumbered human DNA results. For Afshinnekoo, the most surprising part of the study was that half of the DNA sequenced from the samples didn’t match any known organism, which means there is a lot more for researchers to discover.

Since this was the baseline study, further studies need to be done to increase accuracy in the genomic re-

sults. Some searches on DNA found in the subways matched exotic animals including Tasmanian devils and yaks, and the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene questioned the accuracy of thrax and the bubonic plague, even in such small amounts. Bystanders to the sampling process sometimes accused the researchers of spreading HIV, principal investigator of PathoMap Dr. Christopher Mason told the Wall Street Journal. The MTA also refused to comment on the

“The Science Cheerleaders have been all over the nation sharing with ist and encouraging young people to pursue STEM,” Wagner said. “These messages are important in inspiring younger generations to become innovators.”

“The idea of even the name of PathoMap was that we were creating this pathogen weather map so that you could get an alert on your phone of ‘Hey, you’re going to this station, there’s an outbreak of E. coli or this bacteria and you should wash hands or be careful.’”

of current and former professional cheerleaders who are pursuing science careers, coordinated events at the stadiums with local cheerleading groups to sample surfaces, shoes and phones for bacteria to send up to the ISS. Summer Wagner, sustaining engineering lab manager at NASA’s Johnson Space Center and a former Houston Texans cheerleader, said Project MERCCURI was her favorite Science Cheerleader project so far.

The team did a great job introducing microbiology and the experimentation process to the participants, and it was fun to bring her aerospace engineering expertise to a group that doesn’t normally get to conduct experiments in space.

“It was a tremendous success,” pated are able to say that they were a part of an International Space Station experiment.”

While not every participant in the Science Cheerleaders’ programs can say they sent bacteria to the ISS, outreach programs like this are critical for raising the next generation of scientists, including kids like Wagner who had no exposure to it as a kid.

-Ebrahim Afshinnekoo

gained from the surveys is important for the general public as well. In content, the information hosted by microBEnet gives the general public the information they need to raise their own awareness of bacteria, including regular debunking of germophobia and “antimicrobiomism” in the media.

“Over much of recent human history, we’ve treated microbes as the enemy,” Coil said. “If we can convey to people that, you know, they’re not all bad and that we just need to learn to live with microbes instead value to public health and society in doing that.” ___________________________________ Amanda Hutchinson is a senior journalism major who wants you to know that not all bacteria are bad. You can email her at ahutchi2@ithaca.edu.

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Upfront

The next subway project, MetaSUB, will take place this coming summer in 20 cities around the world, including Boston, Mexico City, London, Beijing and Sydney.

The survey aims to compare the microbiomes of subways in cities with varying populations, ridership, number of stations and outdoor environment. Afshinnekoo also said the next New York-based study will look at how the city’s subway microbiome changes throughout the day and throughout the year, using PathoMap as the comparison.

“What we’re really pushing to move forward with, but I guess it’s really a limit of our current technologies, is to have real-time tracking and sampling and even sequencing of these samples,” Afshinnekoo said. “The idea of even the name of PathoMap was that we were creating this pathogen weather map so that you could get an alert on your phone of ‘Hey, you’re going to this station, there’s an outbreak of E. coli or this bacteria and you should wash hands or be careful.’”

Stadiums have also been swabbed for microbiome surveys, but instead of just identifying the bacteria found there, Project MERCCURI sent the samples to the International Space Station to observe how bacteria grow in microgravity conditions. The astronauts also swabbed the ISS to see what kinds of bacteria were already

up there, and Coil said the ISS microbiome is a lot like that of a typical house, which is mostly the bacteria found on human skin.

In addition to the research, Coil said the project was also largely to get the public interested in and excited about microbiology. The Science Cheerleaders, an

Nasty Noise

A look at misophonia and its implications

Yane Ahn, Contributing Writer

M

ost people are repulsed when they hear smacking noises from another person’s mouth or mildly annoyed when somebody taps their with misophonia, however, may bephonia, or selective sound sensitivity syndrome, is a strong dislike or hatred of certain commonly occurring sounds, which trigger irrational and and extreme reactions, according to American neuroscientists Pawel and Margaret Jastreboff, who coined the term.

According to the Jastreboffs’ report titled “Treatments for Decreased Sound Tolerance (Hyperacusis and Misophonia),” misophosound set types. For example, there are oral sounds, such as chewing, yawning or whistling. Some people are triggered by breathing or nasal sounds, as in grunting, snorting or as bad singing or humming. Another possible trigger can be a small, repetitive visual motion such as some-

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

with his or her hands. An additional set is environmental, may it be a dog barking, dishes clattering or distant lawn mowers.

According to advocacy and support group Misophonia UK, people who have misophonia experience response in humans that occurs in response to a perceived harmful event, attack or threat to survival, according to Harvard University physiologist Walter Cannon, who sweating, muscle tension and quickened heartbeat. The over-activation of hormonal circuits may even cause unwanted sexual arousal.

Based on research by Miren

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Edelstein, a PhD student at the University of California at San Diego who published an article on misophonia in the Frontiers in Human Neuroscience journal in June 2013, “the most commonly reported physical effects were pressure in the chest, arms, head or entire body as well as clenched, tightened and tense muscles.”

Other misophonics reported an increase in blood pressure, heart rate or body temperature, sweaty palms, breathing.

This lifelong condition usually starts between the ages of nine and 13 and is more common in females, according to WebMD. There have been outlier cases of the illness being reported as young as age two and during middle-age. The illness isn’t an issue relating to the ears — doctors believe misophonia is part psychological and part physical. Theories suggest it could stem from how sound affects the brain and triggers automatic responses in the body; however, there is debate over its cause. The generally-accepted idea is it is a neurological disorder and expression of a predictable or condidirector of the Misophonia Treatment Institute said misophonia is a subset of sensory processing disorder, a term that refers to the way the nervous system receives messages from the senses and turns t h e m into appropriate motor

and behavior responses.

Misophonia is sometimes mistaken for anxiety, bipolar or obsessive-compulsive disorder. An argument in 2013 pioneered by doctors Arjan Schröder, Nienke Vulink and Damiaan Denys stated misophonia new disorder, as it is not currently Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition, nor in the tion of Diseases and Related Health Problems. The former is the universal authority for psychiatric diagnosis, whereas the latter is a mediby professional health carers and Primary care physician Barron H. Lerner, who has misophonia and is a New York Times blogger, wrote in a piece for the Times’ Well blog, “Please Stop Making The Noise,” in which he shared his take on the often-asked question of whether misophonia really even exists.

Those with misophonia are “much more sensitive than [their] roommates to noises from adjacent apartments,” Lerner wrote in his cannot fall asleep.”

Lerner also described one of his patients whose sleep is interrupted nightly.

“He can rarely fall asleep again, because of his anger,” L e r n e r wrote.

The reactions someone with misophonia suffers from

Image by Adriana Del Grosso

Lerner also wrote. at the Hearing and Tinnitus Center.

As an audiologist, she is a practitioner who treats those with hearing loss and proactively prevents related those with misophonia creates friction between them and those nearby.

“Imagine eating with friends, only you can’t stand their chewing, swallowing … or being in the theatre and hearing crunching popcorn and wanting to kill the person crunching … or sleeping with a partner and being unable to tolerate their breathing; heaven help you if they snore would have an impact.”

On top of that, there is no known cure for misophonia. Instead, those treatments or consult their nearest audiologist for help. Many patients use cognitive behavioral therapy, in which they learn how to distract themselves or substitute white noise or other sounds to avoid becoming angry at others.

There is also tinnitus retraining therapy, which uses a combination tion mechanisms, with directions about how to return to normal life without provoking symptoms. It is based on the work of the Jastreboffs and is primarily aimed at those with

tinnitus and hyperacusis, disorders of abnormal sound sensitivity, but has also claimed success with people suffering from misophonia, according to Misophonia UK. Another form of therapy is habituation, the use of broadband sound generators combined with supportive family and patient follow-up.

The therapy involves lessening the amount of auditory contrast between a quiet background noise and the offending trigger sounds.

Dr. Marsha Johnson, clinical director of the Oregon Tinnitus & Hyperacusis Treatment Center, said as many as three-fourths of her provement during therapy. The severity of misophonia reactions may lessen; however, the use of the devices do not appear to result in longterm recovery, she said.

There are less clinical methods of coping as well. Many people mimic what they hear or see, a coping mechanism that makes the sufferer

nia Association has chapters across the country that holds annual conventions to bring together doctors and patients. There are many discussion forums online of those with misophonia coming together, commenting their surprise when they learn they are not alone.

As with any illness, misophonia can present severe complications for to the doctor to be treated for misophonia can be a struggle.

“Sitting in the waiting room and listening to key strokes on the computer, hacking coughs, people talking low, clicking pens, breathing sounds and chewing gum,” she said, “... a misophonic nightmare.” ___________________________________ Yane Ahn is a freshman journalism major who wants you to stop chewing so loudly. You can email her at yan1@ithaca.edu.

hypnosis or color theory, such as white noise or pink noise.

According to Schröder’s study, lifestyle also plays a role in handling reactions. Exercise, sleep and stress management may help lessen the reactions from the trigger. Another suggested lifestyle change is wearing ear plugs or headsets to tune out sounds. Additionally, The Misopho-

Upfront

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BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

A Sip of Kava Ithaca restaurant offers alternative to the bar scene

By Kaley Belval

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Editorial Note: Paul Galgoczy is the writer’s manager in the audiovisual department of Campus Center and Event Services at Ithaca College.

I

n the basement of the Cornell Daily Sun building on West State Street, community members gather together to drink herbal teas and kava while eating raw, vegan, gluten-free desserts at the Sacred Root Kava Bar. Although the taste of kava, a traditional

its effects often outweigh consumers’ taste buds.

Upfront

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Image by Francesca Toscano

even said, ‘Well, sometimes it tastes like dirt,’ and just downs it.”

The drink is made by grinding up the root of the kava plant and mixing it with water.

“Kava creates a very kind of unique sensation as far as you get an enhanced focus and a greater connection to the world around you, especially nature and other people and Sacred Root, said. “Kava naturally promotes meaningful, social interaction.”

The Sacred Root Kava Bar opened in the summer of 2014 and ignited a loyal following. Customers often visit multiple times a week, especially for events such as Irish Intergenerational Session and open mic poetry nights.

The bar welcomes a wide variety of events. Recently, community members gathered for a Paradigm about a systemic issue and a discussion that followed. In the past, the Sacred Root Kava Bar also hosted open drumming and dance sessions as well as acupuncture and yoga workshops. It periodically has a music event called The Harmonic Temple, “a conscious live electronic deep dub convergence, in a temple of melodic soundscapes” performed by Ecstatic Dance Ithaca DJs.

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

when his band decided to give it a try. ably had three drinks of the kava, and I really did enjoy the feeling,” tle brighter and easier and we were inspired and made some beautiful connections with the people.” felt that the experience allowed him to be more in tune with the people around him, as well as his music.

“I can see that way of just helping people break down a little bit of inhibitions, but you’re still totally alert and perhaps the mind feels like it’s just a little stimulated and more cre-

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different feeling because it’s really not feeling intoxicated and no risk of any harm driving out.”

Similarly, Don Murdoch, a local software engineer, said he sees the Sacred Root Kava Bar as an opportunity to engage with people in a non-intoxicated setting.

“As I’ve gotten older, you know, the bar scene has gotten a little less fun,” Murdoch said. “So this gives me an opportunity to come out and be social and get that social time and arrive back home completely with it and feeling good and relaxed and ready to go on to the next day.”

Murdoch said he sees kava as a drink that not only allows him to feel refreshed, but enhances his normal state of relaxation.

“It is that inhibition cutter that you see in other places and then later in the night, once you get home, you’re more relaxed and your sleep is a lot deeper and usually your dreams are more vivid,” Murdoch said. “So it’s the best of both worlds, you know. but then get your relaxation after it.”

According to many customers, the decor of the bar adds to the peaceful atmosphere that it projects. Followhis wife, Judi, tried to create a space that was representative of their mission.

“Ultimately, we wanted something also very visually stimulating and relaxing at the same time,” he said.

With its gold and turquoise murals, painted mirrors and featured space offers an opportunity to the Ithaca community.

“We kind of view ourselves as a said.

Customers

often

comment

on

its paintings. Each month, the bar features the work of a local artist in their main room. For the month of March, Sacred Root showcased the from Rhode Island who draws on Each month on Gallery Night, an artist reception is held for the featured artist, open to the public.

“I was immediately impressed by

the beauty and artwork that’s all over; I could really feel the integrity and love that they put into this proj“I was really surprised walking down with color and art on all the walls.”

Others said they feel that the physical space is representative of the spirit of kava itself.

“This is such an inspiring space, you know, every detail is well thought of and tended to, it really embraces the root, the grounding, the feminine, the earth energy that kava is.

So I feel like it really captures kava in a space,” Lenessa Shantaya, the co-owner and director of the Yoga School, said. “The events here are so multi-faceted, some of them also I like really couldn’t imagine but it’s ue.”

The topics of conversation that take place within the Kava Bar among community members, employees and performers range from healing practices to local events to the harmful ingredients in common foods. Many of these patrons see Sacred Root as an environment geared toward people who are creative and looking for some deeper interactions with their community.

“What I’ve observed is that kava the people who are drinking it, so mutual receptivity more available,” Marigold*, manager and cultivator of the Sacred Root Kava Bar, said.

“Conversation might be more on the tip of the tongue, and creative collaboration seems more possible. It increases a sense of well-being and can perhaps show a person their center.”

Marigold, an Ithaca College alumna, said she enjoys interacting with all of the customers at the Kava Bar, whether or not they are regulars.

“Even if somebody doesn’t feel like they’re akin to our typical customer, it matters not because we don’t really have like a typical customer necessarily,” she said. “We have a core community of people who come back fairly consistently and then all others are welcome, everyone of all different origins and backgrounds and all different things to say.”

The Sacred Root Kava Bar serves

Image by Kaley Belval

said that many people describe it as a mixture of dirt and wood.

“The taste to some people is not very agreeable; it can be a little bit-

as a place of connection for customers and employees alike. community sharing kava with so many people because I have an opportunity to deeply connect with a lot of different people,” Marigold said. “Because a lot of people are drawn to drink kava, it’s medicine primarily, the way that I see it and it’s a sacred plant and deserves to be treated as such.”

Shantaya regularly makes trips to the Kava Bar to engage in the experience of the drink.

“As I experience it, it relaxes my body and it facilitates conversation and creativity and the basic opening of philosophic thought, spiritual thought, or heart connection with people,” Shantaya said. “Fantastic discussions are facilitated over kava.”

From 4 p.m. to midnight, Monday through Saturday, the Kava Bar is open for customers to interact with their surroundings and the people that they meet as the night progresses.

“Something about coming in here makes it feel okay to discuss, you know, really heartfelt, peaceful concepts that I don’t always feel like it would be safe discussing at school or at work or places like that,” Murdoch said. “It really does feel like a collection of like minds.”

For those who are looking for a place to do work when many other local businesses are closing for the night, some regulars turn to the Sa-

host his own event at the bar.

“It’s a real safe space where you can have freedom to express yourself,” he said.

Sacred Root sells desserts that are all raw, gluten-free and vegan, made each day from scratch by Marigold.

“I feel really blessed to have a space and have an audience and people have been really receptive to what I have to offer and my skills are evolving the more I make things,” she said. “And it’s like my favorite thing that I do.”

The Kava Bar sells Marigold’s desserts, such as salted caramel mocha pie and lemon berry cheesecake, for around $6 each. The teas range in price from $3 to $4, and a coconut shell of kava is $4. Monday through Friday, customers who come in to try kava during happy hour, between 4 p.m. and 8 p.m., can get two shells for the price of one.

“One of the goals of our philosophy is that people should be able to come out and have an enjoyable experience in kind of a luxurious setwithout having a hefty price tag attached to that.”

Many customers value the Sacred Root Kava Bar for providing an alternative to the bar scene and otherwise alcoholic nightlife in Ithaca.

“The space here provides a gathering space for conscious nightlife,” Shantaya said. “Ithaca is just jam packed with people who want something different, but there’s not actually a lot of different stuff going on, so this is great.” this as one of the goals of their bar.

“Unlike some other bars or clubs, the Kava Bar is very welcoming,” he said. “So people come in, people introduce themselves to each other and sort of make really kind of good, meaningful interactions with people easily.”

Customers who regularly visit the Kava Bar believe it creates a different environment than other establishments open at night, which ends up creating new possibilities for community discussion and collaboration.

“I think it’s really wonderful that it’s really created this great space that’s very accessible to people downtown, to really be able to come “Really, it’s just one of the friendlier places too where I always get to meet some new, interesting people and it’s a very relaxing place. You feel you can just come and hang out, no pressure.”

By the account of its customers, Sacred Root has been a place to make connections with creative people who are extremely conscious of their physical, mental and spiritual health while having a relaxing night out.

“The goal for us with this space is to provide kind of an option for people to come and express themselves, either through creativity or through their spirituality or ceremony,” Galtional space that welcomes people of all different viewpoints and giving them an opportunity to share their ideas and beliefs in a welcoming kind of setting.” *The source chooses to identify solely as Marigold. ___________________________________ Kaley Belval is a senior documentary studies major who says kava is not her cup of tea. You can contact her at kbelval1@ithaca.edu.

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Upfront

Image by Kaley Belval

as well as spaces that are large and communal or small and more private.

“If I’m working on my laptop, there’s something about being at a coffee shop or about being out in

public that makes you feel less isolated and less alone,” Murdoch said.

“And I feel that the kava bar really provides that atmosphere at night.”

According to those who attend the Kava Bar, there is never a shortage of entertainment available. Besides its regular events such as music performances or salsa dancing, the owners and employees said they are always open to new ideas.

“Among the intentions is this space is to be a safe space for expression, it’s kind of like an ever-evolving art project,” Marigold said. “And we invite collaboration where people feel called to collaborate, which happens all the time.”

OL. MINISTRYofCOOL. MIN BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

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Arts, entertainment and other things cooler than us.

A Review of Nasty Drinks

Tasting some of the worst alcohol Ithaca has to offer

Jodi Silberstein, Staff Writer

I

strike up conversation. “What’s the nastiest drink you’ve ever had?”

I receive all sorts of responses: Pickle Back, UV Blue, UV Strawberry, Tequila. And what’s interesting is that these people disagreed with each other. The one who hates Pickle Backs (whiskey and pickle juice) subjective; however, I am determined I turn back to the bar and make eye contact with a bartender. “Let’s get creative. I want a really nasty drink.”

The bartender takes out a shaker and pours in Bailey’s, pineapple juice and peach schnapps. She shakes it up, puts it in a short glass, and places it in front of me. “The Cunnilingus. It’s supposed to look like lady sperm.”

Sure enough, the off-white mixture has those same pulpy strands that had been in my mouth just before with the Cement Mixer. I quickly drink it down. It tastes like someone spiked my Dole Pineapple Fruit Cup, which to be honest is not really a terrible thing. So what’s the nastiest drink then?

Before I left for the bar that night, I had taken a shot of vodka for the sole purpose of layering: a thin liquor jacket under my heavy winter coat. I took the vodka out of the freezer and put it in a shot glass. I paced around the kitchen, I clutched my stomach remembering nights of binge-drinking this sinful liquid, I wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans.

I was nervous. I had anxiety — as I do every time I come face to face with a straight shot of vodka. I turned to my roommate. “Can you put on some pump-up music? Can you take a shot with me? Do you have any good chasers?”

Eventually I said the words “fuck it” enough times to just grab the

shot and take it. The aftermath was rather harsh — ugly faces and a with a better taste to put in my mouth. Sure, the Jersey Turnpike be their worst drink), but taste-wise, it’s certainly drinkable. I did not cringe in the aftermath; my stomach did not feel like it was being burned alive.

But taking the vodka shot one step further, during my freshman

It tastes like someone spiked my Dole Pineapple Fruit Cup, which to be honest is not really a terrible thing. year, I walked into my neighbors’ gym-bag smelling, freezing-cold-forTerrace 13. I discovered a bunch of kids sitting around drinking from a bottle labeled Devil Springs. Being the new-comer in the room, rotation paused and the bottle went right to me. I took a swig and ladies and gentlemen, that right there was the absolute nastiest liquid to ever grace these lips of mine.

Before leaving for school, I was warned not to drink the frat-party punch, but I was told NOTHING about Devil Springs. So this is me not warning you, but pleading: do not do it. Do not drink the Devil Springs. ___________________________________ Jodi Silberstein is a senior journalism major who isn’t afraid to knock one back for the sake of journalism. You can email her at jsilber1@ithaca.edu.

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Ministry of Cool

walk in around 10:30 p.m., nod at the bouncer, quickly unload my gloves, hat, scarf and coat, and promptly plant myself on a stool at the bar.

I make eye contact with a bartender and, having spoken with her previously, she throws me a smirk and says, “you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes,” I reply, perhaps more enthusiastically than one would expect given the current situation: “give me the nastiest drink you got.”

With that said, the bartender takes out a shot glass, lifts up one of the mats lining the bar and dumps the collected liquid into the shot glass.

She places it in front of me. “This is the Jersey Turnpike.”

“What’s in it?”

“I have no idea. But we’ve been open since happy hour and a little bit of everything has been spilled onto the mat since.”

Nearly six hours worth of assorted alcohols swirl around the glass. I take a deep breath and down the pale brown liquid in one swift gulp.

By now all the bartenders have at least one eye on me. I give my taste buds a few seconds to process before coming to the conclusion: “It’s not that bad. What else you got?”

Next up is Bailey’s and lime juice — the Cement Mixer — and it comes with directions: “First take the shot of Bailey’s, hold it in your mouth, then take the lime juice, and shake it around in your mouth before swallowing.”

I do as I’m told and next thing I know the contents are curdling in my mouth and I swallow what tastes like sour, pulpy coffee creamer. But still, not that terrible. “These are prank shots,” the bartender assures me, “no one really buys these for themselves.”

At this point, I order a beer and a water and chill out for a minute.

I turn to the people around me and

We Wake Up Like This

Making a statement with non-retouched photos

Celisa Calacal, Staff Writer

B

eyoncé’s exposed L’Oreal photoshoot exposes her pores and non-airbrushed c o m p l e x i o n , bringing one thing to

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

mind: Beyoncé is not These non-retouched photos showcase the world-famous celebrity in a less-than-favorable light, prompting a melting pot of shock and even disgust at her projected appearance. While many of Beyoncé’s fans took to social media sites to defend the pop star, others scoffed at the photos and expressed their distaste for the appearance of pores and the overall This attitude of distaste toward makeup-free female celebrities has continued to prevail in modern society and is propelled by magazine spreads that compile different candid photographs of celebrities caught in public without pounds of makeup caked upon their face, seen in US Magazine’s “Stars Without Makeup” feature. Similar to the large public response to Beyoncé’s leaked photographs, the exposure to more pictures of celebrities without makeup on attracts the public’s attention and a variety of reactions that range from indifference to sympathy to disgust.

The attitude of distaste toward blemishes and an imperfect complexion can be attributed to the unrealistic beauty standards established by the media and advertisements. In a 2009 paper published by Brian Moeran, “Advertising and the Technology of Enchantment: The Portrayal of Beauty in Women’s Fashion Magazines,” he explored the manner in which international fashion magazines such as Elle and Marie Claire convey beauty through advertising, as well as the subsequent reaction from their readers. The paper discussed the

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celebrity presence upon sociallyconstructed beauty standards.

In the paper, Moeran discussed advertisements in dictating how men and women should behave and the products they should purchase to improve their well-being.

“In short, they fashion a particular gendered worldview of the desirable, the possible and the purchasable,” Moeran wrote.

The paper analyzed the way magazines portray beauty and perpetuate idealistic beauty standards through advertisements and beauty spreads on various tips, tricks and how-tos on achieving these expectations. Moeran connected these woman to manipulate her appearance through various means suggests she is a victim of oppressive and idealized beauty standards.

Moeran placed focus on the role of a woman’s face and its importance in everyday social interactions. Stemming from this idea, makeup plays a vital role in maintaining a woman’s “public face” and allows for the selection of a particular “face” to show in public. The downside to this aspect is the unrealistic standards makeup advertisements continue to push by silently conveying that a woman’s face Charisse Koba, aesthetician and makeup artist and founder of Miel Beauty Bar, said the media industry how society thinks about beauty, and the impact Photoshop and airbrushing has on society’s perception of physical appearance, which can be damaging to a young woman’s growing self-esteem.

“It’s not what the real person looks like. It’s unrealistic,” she said. “I think it can negatively impact by creating this idealism especially for young women who are growing up in this to have completely unrealistic expectations and have some security issues and think that they’re not gonna be wanted

if they don’t look a certain way.”

Koba further said she views makeup as a form expression and a way to highlight a woman’s natural “For women, that’s at the root, it’s our self-esteem,” she said. “I think women want to exude a certain persona or personality. When we wear makeup sometimes we just instantly feel better about ourselves so anything we can do to promote that feeling I think is something that can become a part of our every day.”

While some may see the beauty industry as perpetuating ridiculous beauty ideals, Yvette Burggren, owner of Miel’s with a degree in media studies from New School University, said it is more the magazines and Photoshop who hold most of the power in emphasizing unrealistic beauty standards.

“I think it’s perfectly normal for a woman to want to put on makeup or celebrity to want to put on makeup, but I think that the images that we’re seeing are these kind of heavily Photoshopped images,” she said. “It’s not so much the makeup, it’s the airbrushing and the intensifying of the photography and the fact that it’s so pervasive. The beauty industry, what it’s trying to do and what we’re doing is to make ourselves feel our best. We’re not trying to promote unrealistic crazy looks.”

Moeran discussed the role of celebrities in his paper, recognizing that society tends to often copy the appearances of those at the top of the socioeconomic scale and assigns status to those considered attractive.

What unfavorable photos expose other than acne and pores is a perception of celebrities that elevates them above the average individual.

“When you’re looking at the celebrity world that’s like we’re putting these people on a pedestal and Photoshopping them and making them look totally unrealistic,” Burggren said.

Moeran said in an interview that

celebrities themselves are commodities used to purvey, advertise and promote various other commodities such as “I think that has a major effect because the sheer number of photographs of celebrities must have an effect on people and we spend far too much time reading totally nonobjective media of various kinds,” he said.

Moeran also pointed out that the frequency with which people involve themselves with the media relates to how much they like and pay attention to the world of celebrities.

“I think we spend far too much time accepting what the media tell us, we don’t criticize,” he said.

Celebrities are often placed into strict boxes with achievements in relationship between female celebrities and the general public is one in which society enjoys living vicariously through the glitz and glamour of their favorite shining stars. This type of relationship creates a thin and invisible barrier separating the famous from the ordinary, and the exposure of celebrities as anything less than division.

Koba said the power of the advertising industry over constructions on into the crowd.

The disgust showcased toward unfavorable photographs of female celebrities has its roots in the unrealistic expectation for these and void of any physical imperfections.

Seeing these successful celebrity

by a celebrity such as Demi Lovato is controlled by the subject herself.

Furthermore, society is more likely to express approval of a fresh-faced celebrity if she posts a photo with the intent of spreading positive messages of self-acceptance and trends such as “No Makeup Monday” promote positive beauty ideals through the posting of Society’s distaste toward physical imperfections as evidenced by the negative reaction to less-than-favorable photographs of celebrities is further fueled by beauty products. Major companies such as Neutrogena, Clean and Clear and Proactiv advertise their products in such a way that showcases acne, pimples and the like as unfavorable and distasteful.

Slogans such as Clean and Clear’s “Clean, Clear and Under Control” toward facial blemishes by conveying the idea they should be hidden from the public eye. These commercials portray teenagers with acne as embarrassed and shameful, their humiliation and shame only disappearing once

their acne disappears. The result is the implantation of the concept that blemish-free skin with the advertised products.

Burggren attributed society’s disdain for facial blemishes through a biological standpoint.

“Biologically, we’re tuned in to all these cues of health,” she said.

“Usually if you have blemishes or something red it’s signaling a problem in the body and we’re just kind of tuned into that. There’s like visual cues that signal bodily health from an evolutionary standpoint. That’s why we seek perfection.”

It is the deceptive nature of advertising, Moeran said, that contributes to its negative impact upon women and young girls.

“I think that every time an image of a woman is used in a fashion magazine or in an advertisement, Photoshopped in some way to change it to make it look a little bit more slender or get rid of a slight mark on her cheek, if that happens I think, like cigarette adverts, there should be a large sign at the bottom of the picture saying, ‘This image has been Photoshopped,’” he said. “This image does not look like the woman who was photographed.”

The powerful combination of the beauty industry and the perception of celebrities contributes to the distaste toward any sort of physical imperfections. But it is this type of attitude that further strengthens society’s ridiculous and impossibleto-achieve beauty standards. Leaving behind one’s preconceived notions of beauty and perfections, the only message Beyonce’s L’Oreal pictures convey is this: Yes, Beyoncé can wake up like this. ___________________________________ Celisa Calacal is a freshman her skin, pores and all. You can email her at ccalacal@ithaca.edu.

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Ministry of Cool

meet these preconceived notions elicits negative reactions leading to judgment that criticizes the individual. Although visible pores, acne or other facial blemishes are not uncommon for a human to combat, the judgment and negative comments toward the sight of a celebrity with these imperfections

only emphasizes the idea that the “unnatural” is the most appealing.

“At a certain point some people have this expectation that celebrities should look perfect at all times,” Koba said. “And I think that’s our reaction to a way that we’ve been brainwashed a little bit.”

However, there exists another side to this same coin, where the posting of a picture of makeupfree celebrities prompts a positive reaction of praise and admiration.

In this case, the difference in public reaction lies within the context of the photograph. While Beyoncé’s photographs were leaked and therefore uncontrolled,

Undead Romance

Finding love in the arms of monsters

John Jacobson, Social Media Editor

H

uman narratives have always been fascinated with the undead.

They’re seen in the works of Bram Stroker, John Polidori and Mary Shelley with the gothic undead, and in the zombie

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

been whispered about throughout history, such as with the Countess Elizabeth Bathory, famous for allegedly drinking human blood.

Folklore from all human civilizations has created images and perceptions of the undead, some of which are disgusting.

These creatures permeate civilizations around the world through countless mythologies.

Western thought has circled back to the living dead with the gothic innovators of the Victorian era and within the past few decades. Our culture has become fascinated with shaping and reshaping the bodies of the dead, whether it has been The Walking Dead or Twilight.

The real question is why our most recent cultural shift has placed these characters within a romantic narrative. Even when Dracula and Sheridan Le Fanu’s Carmilla feature commentary on sexuality, The Vampyre and Dracula both present the undead as men of the aristocracy, but the vampires still felt more comfortable in crypts and crumbling castles than sparkling in the woods of Forks, Washington.

Tami Veldura, author of the romance anthology Fanged, said she believes the undead have narrative purpose.

“The undead strike a particular consciousness,” she said. “We’re faces in things that are nonhuman. The dissonance created by making a recognizable human

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form intellectually non-human is powerful, and the more closely it can interact with the uncanny valley, the stronger that effect is. Stories are, at their most basic, trying to evoke a reaction. The non-living are good for that.”

These supernatural narratives often exist within the realm of popular media. Veldura, as an author of romance, horror and erotica, saw the space as one that can use supernatural creatures like the undead to ask questions.

“The undead have always been a way for people to explore part of the question about death,” she said. “What happens after death?

Does any part of you survive death? Does the mind exist as an organizational structure of the brain or is consciousness something more ethereal than chemical and mechanical systems? If you could raise the dead, would they be who they were? What does that say about the notion of souls?”

Present-day narratives have latched onto one type of the undead, the vampire, with large commercial success. The 1980s brought on the Vampire Chronicles series, which started with Interview with a Vampire and spawned a late ’90s was the home of television show Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the Anita Blake book series. The former ran for seven seasons and spawned a cult following; the latter is still in print, with the 24th fulllength book coming out in June of 2015.

Post-2000s, the most prominent successes with vampires have followed similar pathways. Twilight was a bestselling book series and The Vampire Diaries was a book series that started in the ’90s and came back to life as a television series on the CW, along with a spinoff show. Both are still airing new seasons. True Blood, a hit show

on HBO, ran for seven seasons and was also based on a bestselling book series.

Twilight’s overwhelming popularity is considered by many to be a height of vampire saturation in the media. It still deals with vampires as undead immortal beings, but it presents them in a new light that may be one of the reasons for the growing popularity of non-living love interests.

Melissa Click, a professor in the Department of Communication at the University of Missouri, said its success initially lies in its fan base.

“Before Twilight, we didn’t use to see — and we still don’t see it much — women,” she said. “A lot of our blockbuster media tends to focus on men.”

Click’s research found the audience of Twilight, one mostly made up of women, to be an interesting aspect of the fan base. “There were a lot of instances where teen girls were made fun of … and also the adult women that were Twilight fans were made fun of,” she said. “They were told that they ruined Comic-Con, that they didn’t belong there.”

Despite the sexism and alienation women often face in fan cultures, the fan culture of Twilight is one that allows women to explore traditional romantic narratives. Click made it clear the placement of an undead narratives is far from unusual.

“I think, for the most part, male vampires are an interesting love interest,” she said. “They do a lot of things that men that aren’t vampires in that genre of romance already do. They’re bad boys in some way — they’re dangerous in some way, you don’t want to mess with them because there’s danger around them. But they also have a sort of sensitive side. One of the that there is this bad guy, and he meets this true heroine — this pure

woman — and it’s kind of her job to turn him into a suitable partner, and once she is able to transform him, he’s everything that she’s ever desired.”

The romantic narrative above focuses less on the graphic aspects of vampire mythology and more on the darker, human qualities that can be attributed to the creatures.

Well-known franchises are not the only places the undead inhabit in our modern media. Paranormal romance and urban fantasy author Lori Devoti has published books about the supernatural since 2007, giving her a long-term perspective on these tropes.

“I have written a few undead characters, both vampires and zombies, but I tend to drift more toward other fantasy creatures,” she said. “My favorites are from various mythologies. So as far as why I wrote about the undead that I did, I like the tortured back story that you can give these characters. There is nothing too deep or dark for a vampire. The zombies in my stories were classic villains. Nothing sexy or appealing about them.”

She added: “It’s a great contrast

between Twilight fans and fans of other franchises. While the validity of modern vampire franchises and the women that love them may be questioned, the impact on our culture and our views of the undead

saw more than just an impact. “If the 1980s, I think there is a way in which the vampire — even going back to Bram Stoker — there is a way that the vampire circulates through popular culture.”

Today’s popular culture does more than romanticize the undead: it uses them to ask questions. “I think that media is sort of focused on this idea of struggling with your inner demons and how you can live with the bad aspects of humanity,” Click said.

“The undead are a solid part of our cultural consciousness now, which makes subverting their narratives the next step in the evolution of their stories,” Veldura said. “A zombie who runs around trying to eat brains is common. But a zombie who falls in love? A spirit that doesn’t have total control over the body it’s possessing?

A spirit that can’t quite hold the dead body it’s possessing together?

These are all unexplored avenues.” media have the opportunity to become something more, both as cultural mythology and as springboards for larger ideas. While the circular nature of our media suggests we will see less of the undead, the opportunities to make them romantic and sympathetic give them room to become something new for our culture.

That’s the thing about vampires, them off, but they come back.” ___________________________________ John Jacobson is a sophomore integrated marketing communications major who won’t be mackin’ with a zombie anytime soon. You can email them at jjacobs1@ithaca.edu.

Click said she believes Twilight in “I think the thing that Twilight did was that it proved to Hollywood that women can fund a franchise like men can.”

On the subject of vampires, Click

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Ministry of Cool

acceptance and romantic love. They start out dark, tortured and cold and have an arc that makes them much more human. It’s kind of the ultimate character arc for an author to write.”

The appearance of the undead in these narratives is more than sex appeal (or a lack thereof).

Dark, tortured characters have inhabited romantic narratives and supernatural narratives alike. The addition of death or a death-like state opens the door for a dark and tortured past beyond human understanding.

Because of the resurgence in vampires and zombies in romantic narratives, our society’s interpretation of them is changing. “I do think today people see vampires,

and probably to some extent zombies too, as more sympathetic with either potential to again become good or so tortured by their dark past that even if they have to be destroyed it is with sadness for the loss of who they had been,” Devoti said.

Changing images don’t necessarily mean changing fans. “I think Twilight polarized a lot of the creative community,” Veldura said. “Some people are solidly in the camp that vampires are over. Others are trying their best to revert to monstrous undead in response. Others have been writing in the paranormal genre for decades and they’re simply doing what they’ve always done.”

Devoti mentioned a similar coupling of fans and resistance when it came to the presence of vampires in particular. “The main negative response that I have noticed is from hardcore vampire fans who object to newer authors (newer to Bram Stoker) making them sympathetic.

There is also a huge jealousy factory towards some of the newer authors who have made it ‘big’ with these sympathetic vampires. I think both are completely natural and to be expected, but not particularly important so far as a negative effect that might stop readers from wanting these books.”

Fans, more than anyone else, seem to be dictating this sympathetic, romantic view of the undead. This clash of vampire styles is one found

RAW SAW FROM THE

Grooms

With each new album, the sound of

Comb the Feelings Through Your Hair Album Review Lisa Laffend Staff Writer

fourth studio album, Comb the Feelings Through Your Hair, they’ve taken the instrumentation of their typical psychedelic rock and melded it into a smooth cloud, pumping with a steadystinging drum, blurring where the guitar ends and the keys begin. Voice becomes just another instrument with the repeated use of Oh’s and Ooo’s to build the wash of sound backing each track. What was formerly a wash of similar jagged timbres creating tension, has been polished into a well-blended wall of pastels. Grooms retained a lot of the dissonance its fans are used to, with the same slightly rusty vocals jumping in and out of the foreground.

The album opens with one of its best

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

that of dirty bubbles boiling or a squeaky shoe swishing down a hallway, wobbling into the song. Sleigh bells building into a squeaky, clean forest of sounds shortly join it. An echo-y male vocal enters the song from a distance, remaining in the shadows, fading in and out as the song goes on. Something that sounds like a or almost like the whistling of a bird, swings through the background. The as the song reaches its climax, before descending into echoing of a light chimelike instrument.

Jumping into the title track next, a new standard is set. No longer are the vocals massaged into the instrumentals nor the range of instrumentation so diverse. From here on out the lead vocals tend to keep

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the rough-edged sound fans of Grooms know so well. The guitars and keys and bass twirl away in a hypnotic trance broken only by the constant, restless rustling of drums.

As the album works its way onto “Cross Off” and “Something Wild” and carries on to the end with “Grenadine Scene from Inside” and “Foster Sister,” the drum builds slowly from track to track, demanding more attention, almost challenging the power of the vocals.

As each song passes, they burst like a popped bubble with a second or two of silence, rather than fade into each other and blend like one endless medley.

The longest track, and one of the best, is “Doctor M.” With a rougher start of muted strings followed by a stinging riff on repeat, this track jumps from the gate with a dizzying speed. A demanding near chant, emphasized with a ghostly backing vocal, joins this edgy tone. Halfway through the song, the buzzing melody is disbanded and all that’s left are bursts of twinkling chords fading in and out of silence which melts into the chatter of a bustling restaurant or train station.

With sounds that could only be described as ripped from a strange dream, Grooms would work well mixed in with Tame Impala or Animal Collective.

Comb the Feelings Through Your Hair is a mesmerizing cloud of sweet, shimmering sounds designed to keep minds spinning.

Father John Misty

In a way, everything in Father John Misty’s latest album, I Love You, Honeybear, can be journey from one place to the next; but in the

I Love You, Honeybear Album Review Joel Kalow

Contributing Writer

Father John Misty’s alter-ego Josh Tillman’s trademark sense of wordplay and humor.

“Everything is doomed/ And nothing will be spared,” bellows frontman Tillman in the titular track, a sing-songy way of articulating the cynicism that pervades much of Tillman’s work. The song is full of crass imagery: admissions of mental illness. However, One Day,” the chaotic and messy nature of the relationships referenced (primarily surrounding Tillman’s wife) has been extracted into something pure, as Tillman thought it’d be so simple.”

I Love You, Honeybear is an album about modern romance. It’s about meeting someone

Kaley Belval Seesaw Editor

great bands, Father John Misty preserves its unique tone. It has developed and widened its scope musically, but it remains fundamentally the same.

I Love You, Honeybear is, beyond anything else, a gift from a husband to his wife. It’s a confession of past sins, an aggressive introspective look at Tillman’s past, present and future. He packs it all up in less than 45 minutes in a haze of inebriated melancholy-drenched rock, culling together disparate relationships and memories into something natural and authentic, something that transcends the trappings of “sad indie rock” and becomes something wholly original. Simple, indeed.

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night opens up as any other Western stereotypically would: a black and white image with a

to be feared.

Amirpour showcases her exceptional knowledge of past Iranian art works

landscape of the made-up Bad City

create a masterpiece that is a poignant representation of Iranian New Wave cinema. Unfortunately, her allusions are lost on a large number of audience members watching her work, unless they previously studied these genres on their own.

attractive young man with cowboy boots, jeans, a tucked-in white t-shirt with slicked back hair, sunglasses on and a lit cigarette at his lips. From the opening

Film Review

story of how Tillman met his wife.

Father John Misty retains its Laurel-Canyonafter-four-beers sound on its follow-up to 2012’s Fear Fun well. The songs run the gamut from Americana,

hero — or in this case, heroine — to be a man-eating vampiress. number of challenges to an American audience — it is completely in Farsi, with English subtitles — but it is so innovative that it’s hard to walk away from the theater without talking about it. Made in more extraordinary than a typical thriller, horror movie, or feminist art work calling for social change. main character, a young Iranian woman, roams the streets of Bad City at night searching for misogynistic and otherwise “bad” boys or men to feast on. While in Iranian society it is typically considered dangerous for women or girls to be alone on the streets, Amirpour creates a female character who is not scared of the dark streets. Instead, she is the one who needs

young feminist vampire’s life within Bad City as she murders chauvinists, Amirpour also illuminates elements of the lives of secondary characters, namely her love interest from the opening scene, Arash. While working to support himself and his drugged-out father, he eventually meets the protagonist, who reluctantly lets him in. Not to say that their relationship is that the vampire killed his father as well.

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night is a compelling piece, beautifully composed and structured. The young vampire, who lures the audience in with her mission to harm only the most misogynistic of the city.

Just watch out boys, the next time you’re preying on an innocent female, another may just be waiting in the shadows to sink in her teeth.

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Ministry of Cool

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night

up a real relationship. Tillman serenades

modern world (“True Affection”), about being a celebrity and how that affects his lovelife (“The Night Josh Tillman Came To Our Apt.”) and shows the most grotesque sides of himself (“Nothing Good Ever Happens At The Goddamn Thirsty Crow”). He does all of this so he can purge the complicated, cynical feelings he has

Dirty Afternoon Delight Anonymous

A

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

fter an hour of a pickup beach volleyball game on the sand court in the side lawn of a church on a hot June afternoon in Nebraska, everyone was dripping in sweat and coated in a thick layer my companion and I left the court and helped hose each other off.

As I swept the spray back and forth across him, the sandy brown water ran in rivulets down the contours of his muscular body, streaming over his rounded calves and then across his feet, and back to the earth. His face scrunched up and he gasped with delight at the refreshing cold of the spray, and I couldn’t help but think of some nights together where he made a similar noise.

As he wiped his eyes and reached for the hose to return the favor, he saw me looking up and down his body and smiled. After we were both as clean as we could get with a basic hose-off, we went to our tent to clothes.

We always made a point to try to place our tent away from others.

Given our preferred and frequent nighttime activity, it was just the

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respectful thing to do. At this particular campsite, that meant while everyone else was clustered behind the church and in the side lawn, we set up on the front lawn of the church, in full view of the road and a row of houses. Thank God for rain covers.

Zipping up the door behind us, we helped each other wiggle out of our muddy, sopping wet clothes and tossed them into a corner of the tent. With our clothes off, it was easy to see we still had plenty of sand sticking to us in places the hose hadn’t reached.

Tents are great on chilly nights when you’re lying still and trying to fall asleep; they trap your body heat in the space and help you stay warm.

But on a hot summer afternoon in the midst of a passionate workout, it’s like wearing a ski jacket in a greenhouse.

With neither of us having seen a real shower in over a week and the running with sweat, we were too gross for foreplay.

We started off close together, his arms around me as he worked his hips, but as the temperature in the tent rose and our bodies got more and more slippery with perspiration,

we pulled away and kept as far from each other as we could while still remaining connected at the pelvis. our sweat that he struggled to keep his knees from sliding out from under him, and the sand scratched against my back. Practically all of my body’s water content came myself thinking more about getting out of the tent than I was about the wonderful sensations down below.

The deed done, we scrambled to open the tent’s windows, just enough to let the breeze in without exposing ourselves to passersby. There had been times in my life where I was in too much pain to move, or too exhausted to move — this was the gross to move. With my clothes in a sopping, disgusting heap in the corner, I found myself trapped in our little sauna by my nakedness. He bravely unraveled his soiled shorts and donned them to venture forth and fetch towels and dry garments.

In the end, giving myself a thorough scrub with a dry towel and putting on fresh clothes felt better than the sex itself.

Prose & Cons

&CONS. PROSE&CONS. PROSE&

39

Rattled

By Amanda Livingston She sat down on the bench in the subway station and rubbed at her calves. Traveling to the city shouldn’t be agitated or nervous — she didn’t expect anything from him. She hadn’t gotten her hopes up.

But she was still excited about it.

Being without a father for most of her life had her used to disappointment, anyway.

He hadn’t called her, hadn’t written her a letter, hadn’t made any attempt to contact her before last a long way from home.

She had made the trip by herself that morning without telling anyone, slipping quietly out of the place. It hurt her not to tell her mother what she was doing — but she was afraid she wouldn’t have allowed her to go. easy plan that had been executed perfectly. She had always been independent, despite the clingy, overprotective nature of her mother. That’s what you become when you grow up without a dad. But she

The city had always made her nervous. Subways had always made her nervous. So many people, so shoulder. She wondered about the teenager. He probably didn’t care about his family.

The businessman probably didn’t have time for his family, if he had one at all.

She wondered what was going through their minds at that moment.

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

whole life was enough. It had changed her world, that letter.

Grease, the people in the station cared. They didn’t care about anything except their own lives, their own problems.

Suddenly, a pair of lights appeared in the distance, and got bigger and bigger as the train car approached.

She tightly shut her eyes. The car raced past her swiftly, and the rush of air blew past her.

She felt rattled.

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Moonwalker

by Alexis Farabaugh Sometimes I sit on the moon, who also sits, but in the anesthetic space of time, and I take off my rose-colored glasses when I land because it’s already rosy here.

I can watch roses bloom from the seeds of passing stars without needing another’s rosy cheeks or limbs to share radiation because I am joined by the sun.

Gravel and grain on this terrain do not irritate my skin after I have stepped on its anatomy, the very torso people look to at night, because this place knows me better than the blue and green on Earth.

This land has shaken hands with my rose-colored heart and watched it pump each beat and watched me breathe each breath while I watched my home planet spin and spin with the inexplicable.

When I question returning back to Earth the craters speak on the moon’s behalf and tell me, “You must go back, you cannot stay forever,” and I am presented with my rose-colored glasses and I read the inscribed temples: For you, a numbed reality.

Prose & Cons

41

I greet my mat My soul The things that pour out of me Opening each pore Finding tears sometimes Yoga Is the supple string That runs through my veins I grasp the rope Breathing Resting It holds the weight My mind Is brushing against my bare feet My heart Yoga Is a thousand steeples Meeting in one room To simply breathe Yoga Is boarding a plane

Yoga In every palm you touch Is a small stone you toss Only to feel ripples within you The molecules dance

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

Yoga Is greeting my mat Knowing this gentle revolution Is the string of every vein The continuity and community I want to wrap it all up in paper

Every day of life Breathing, moving, blessing The palms of everyone I meet

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Salutations

A Broken Goodbye

By Samantha Brodsky

it would be to let go.

energy from the radio, some last minute strength to surge through his veins and propel him bravely forward.

could not be with him because she was unhappy. It might as well have been raining too with violins whining used to melt my insides, I clenched my teeth to silence the sobs that threatened to escape off my tongue. My

cool

savor, savor my essence. To savor me.

Prose & Cons

43

you won’ a town to go to but not to be in. you won’ get yer hands round’ her neck. you won’ be ditched out on the interstate somewhere between New York and San Diego. so that you can fall off if you walk far nuff. there’s cold puddles of ice that ripple behind the food-marts of gas stations make doughnuts with gasoline.

gon’ home now

By Train Schickele

make your coffee black with styrofoam and send ye back out to the northeast april to peddle behind the car wash by the generator and the chain link. you look down at the snowmelt; slush all rusty brown on the highway making tea stains on cuffs yor’ pants. you got a bungee cord for a shoelace. you sneak onna train like they do in movies; the yellow freight-car looks like a school bus. you hiss out whispers while it click-clacks. ** you won’ be holding her neck. kinda’ pinch the nape of her brown neck. you won’ be brushing through the cornstalks whispering into the corn for hunds’ of miles in some curtains of an abandoned house. you won’ stay in the curtains and corn.

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

wonder if she’s seen you outta York, outta Sioux, outta Tennessee, Hampshire. won’ know if she seen you gon’ home yet on Route forty, sixty, eighty, one-oh-wun. you won’ a town to go to but not to be in. but you don’t won’ this house or this gas station. forests in the hills with berries and poison berries so gon’ home now. into her arms an’ holding her neck now.

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Sawdust

SAWDUST. SAWDUST. SAWDUST

Satire threatening the magazine’s credibility since 1856.

45

You Know You (Don’t) Want It Robin Thicke cleans up his act

Rachel Mucha, Staff Writer

L

ent, notoriously, can be a time of great struggle and sadness.

That said, a not-sobeloved celebrity took on what seemed to be an impossible task. Jerk-face billionaire playboy Robin Thicke made a bold declaration recently.

“I’m going to stop being such a gross douchebag,” Thicke said in a press release, wearing a fedora and Ray Ban sunglasses, even though it was nighttime.

Everyone was extremely skeptical, for obvious reasons, but an anonymous source delivered to my team the smoking gun. Below you which he kept during the entirety of Lent.

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

Day One: I feel absolutely wonderful. A few nights ago I had the most amazing epiphany while I was tripping on acid. If I want to get Paula back, all I need to do is clean up my act! Lent provides the perfect opportunity. Oh, did I mention I found God, too? Yeah, it was right after my threesome with some halfpriced hookers. Anyway, I’m all religious now (I even got a big cross tattoo!!) so for the next 40 days, I will be on my best behavior. LEGGO! Day Two: I feel weak today. I felt much stronger yesterday. Everything was going so well until I logged onto my computer; my desktop wallpaper — one of my seven collages of Paula — stared me right in the face, and before I could even think I was in my car, ready to go stand outside of Paula’s window. When I realized what I had done, I jumped out and doused the car with the rest of my liquor. As I lit the match, I realized just what a long journey this was going to be.

Day Ten: me. My good friend and occasional

46

booty call Miley Cyrus invited me to a party. She promised there would be lots of drugs and twerking. I know, right? This party has my name written all over it. I was forced to decline. I didn’t know my ticket to heaven and Paula’s arms would come at such a high price.

Day Twenty-Three: Today I got an email from almost all of my favorite porn sites. “Come back, Robin,” it said. “We miss you.” They even offered me a discount for my membership next month. Did you hear that, diary? They miss me, and I miss them. Wait. I just remembered the pictures I took of Paula getting dressed last month. Those will sustain me for now.

Day Thirty: I must admit I am struggling, and today the Lord sent me my biggest test yet. I saw Paula at the grocery store!!! I was in so much shock I dove behind the bananas (hehe) so she wouldn’t see me. Man, she looked so beautiful and wonderful and irresistible. And you know what, diary? I watched her go to her car and leave, and I didn’t follow her! I didn’t break into her house or take pictures of her while she slept. Victory. Gone is every trace Day Thirty-Seven: My good friend and occasional heroin supplier T.I. called me today.

Apparently he has an idea for another hit song about rape. Want to know the worse part, diary? as it did all those years ago. In fact, I felt nothing. Leaving T.I. hurt and confused, I told him to do the song on his own. Afterward, I threw my phone out the window into my alligator moat. If T.I. ever tries to pressure me into a song again, I’ll just have to say no and shake it off.

Shake it off.

Day Thirty-Eight: In case you couldn’t tell from my last few entries, I began to listen to Taylor Swift. I thought I would give some new music a try to go with my new life. She is just fantastic. Taylor really is a beautiful woman. She is so independent and intelligent and writes wonderful songs. She actually lives close by. What if I just popped over to introduce myself and say hi? It would only take a minute and she’d have to let me in. Even if she said no, I’d know that she really means yes.

Day Thirty-Nine: Holy crap, this has to be quick. So my meeting with Taylor did not go as planned. She called the cops, things got ugly and I ran. I’m just going to keep running.

Perhaps I will go back to Canada and seek shelter there. Why do all of these women in my life have to overreact?! Just let me love you!

Tomorrow is Easter, maybe I will send Taylor a lovely gift basket as an apology. Goodbye for now, diary, old friend. I must leave you behind, along with my old identity. Perhaps I will revisit you next year when I try Lent again. Surely I can win over Taylor. She is my one true love, after all. ________________________________ Rachel Mucha is a sophomore journalism major who is looking forward to Robin Thicke’s new album about Taylor Swift. You can email her at rmucha1@ithaca.edu.

“Ya Nasty!”

Raven Symone reclaims TV fame

Claire McClusky, Staff Writer

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hen the hit TV series “That’s So Raven,” starring Raven Symone as Raven Baxter

its end, it hurt everyone. I swear I cried for days. But then Raven Symone’s character, Raven Baxter, went off to college while her father and brother moved into the White House in the hit TV series “Cory In the House.” Both TV shows, with their critical acclaim, had to come to an end, and we are all deeply saddened. However, by the glory of all that is good, it has recently been announced that Raven Symone will be starring in another hit TV series in her classic character, Raven Baxter. Raven Symone as Raven Baxter is NOT over.

I know Raven Symone, who plays Raven Baxter, has had a life to live, but it’s so exciting she is coming back to us. The anticipation for another Raven Baxter, played by Raven Symone, spin-off show is growing and growing. The wait is nearly over. This new show is going to balance television and many old fans’ lives, something that has been needed for too long already.

Are you ready for a new show, named after the iconic catch phrase “Ya Nasty”? I know I am. I am just the biggest fan of Raven Baxter, especially when she is played by Raven Symone. The other shows with the Baxter family are so wonderful they are almost disturbing. This new show is bound to be just as beautifully crafted with vicious brilliance. It’s so overwhelming already — I could throw up I’m so excited. So many people are going make sense again. I bet the show will have the perfect inappropriate

see her replacing the notorious RBG in the Supreme Court. The show is going to be so great, so foul — I’m so ready.

There are plenty of people who feel the same as me. One source, Raven Slimone — who is such a big fan of Raven Symone as Raven Baxter that she got her name changed — spoke to me about her excitement.

Slimone said: “The show has the perfect cast. Oh snap, am I so pumped up for ‘Ya Nasty’. Totally gonna celebrate with a sick premiere partay.” She even invited me to the party. I’m so honored, I could puke.

Raven Baxter, played by Raven Symone, is also going to have to deal with some skeevy moral dilemmas

for many of her old friends have trouble since high school. This saddens me greatly. Her old friends may have changed since high school but Raven Baxter, played by Raven Symone, better not be tarnished by this new show. I guess she’ll just have to hilariously work through decisions about whether to cover their cloddish selves or not.

I can already tell “Ya Nasty” is going to be wonderful. I am currently preparing to completely submerge myself in the show by taking a leave of absence at school and stocking up on canned goods. I might shit myself I am so excited for this show that is guaranteed to be vile yet virtuous. Anyways, if any of you out there are gross nerd idiots that don’t love Raven Symone as Raven Baxter, you obviously have not watched enough of the Baxter family’s shows. You really appall me, but everyone deserves to enjoy the classic lines such as “Yep that’s me!” or “Oh snap” delivered by Raven Baxter, played by Raven Symone. So if anyone hasn’t seen all of “That’s So Raven” starring Raven Symone as Raven Baxter and all of “Corey In the House,” they need to watch. “Ya Nasty” is coming and we all need to prepare for the greatness of Raven Baxter, played by Raven Symone, to be on our screens once again. ___________________________________ photography & visual art major who is currently working on erotic “That’s “Ya Nasty!”. You can email her at cmcclusky@ithaca.edu.

Sawdust

age group of the audience Raven Symone already had while playing Raven Baxter — not that everyone

can’t enjoy Raven Symone as Raven Baxter (the greatest character ever).

In “Ya Nasty,” the girl with special abilities to see into the future is still getting into grossly extreme situations and wearing bizarre costumes. Just seeing her in her own costumes again is going to touch me.

Even though she gave up her dreams to become a famous fashion designer and left the Fashion Institute of Technology, she still has big dreams.

I’ve read that the series will feature Raven Symone as Raven Baxter, post Law School, moving back to the west coast after graduating from Columbia University and landing a job as a federal judge. They are even continuing to tie in the other Baxter family shows.

Due to his job as a chef in the White House, Raven’s father got her an in with the president. This is what gets her nominated for her judgeship. Maybe getting the position this way is playing dirty, but it’s not so repulsive: of course her brilliance and charm got her the votes from the Senate. Deep down, I just know Raven Baxter, played by Raven Symone, is good and really just has to deal with many scummy people. The show better allow her to

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Ithaca’s Newest Mascot

Unemployed graduate takes on role of Ithacat

Michael Villani, Contributing Writer

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THACA, NY – Since returning from winter break, Ithaca College students have made numerous sightings of what appeared to be a man living in various bushes around campus. Many students have been referring to the man as the famous Ithacat since the cat has not returned to campus for the 2014-15 year and people need something to be crazy about.

Little is known about the man, except that he might be a recent graduate who is probably looking to avoid the enormous debt brought upon him from Ithaca College.

Freshman Daniel Kustin, who had an encounter with the Ithacat-man, recalled he saw the man while leaving Towers.

“I wasn’t sure what he was doing, but then I heard him meow,” said Kustin. “I just thought he was on something, to be honest.”

Authorities are aware of the problem, but are powerless. The Ithaca City Police Chief said, “Whenever we read him his rights and ask if he understands, he responds by purring, which in New York State courts does not equate to a verbal ‘yes’ response.”

After some searching, I found the man sleeping under a bush by Landon, wearing nothing but jorts and a scarf from the Salvation Army. I attempted to interview him: “Can I ask you a few questions?”

“Meow?”

I pressed on. “What is your name?”

“ME-ow.”

“How long do you intend on keeping up this charade?”

“Meoooow.”

“Are you trying to create a conversation over the increase in tuition at IC or is this a social commentary on the homelessness problem in Ithaca?”

One Can at a Time

“I’m trying to bring attention to how the president’s salary grossly exceeds any other administrative entity, especially that of faculty. They are the boots on the ground here and deserve proper compensation.”

I was taken aback by the man’s eloquent answer. “That was beautiful.

Why don’t you speak like that instead of purring?” “...Meow meow.”

My journalistic efforts for naught, I gave up. “Will you be here after Late Nite?”

The man was not available for comment after Late Nite. He was too busy being pet by some drunken students, who didn’t seem to notice he wasn’t the original Ithacat. _______________________________________ Michael Villani is a freshman televisionradio major who’s ready to slap on some jorts and roll around in the mud. You can email him at mvillani@ithaca.edu.

Drunken college student attempts to save planet

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Michele Hau, Staff Writer

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

unior business major Dirk Sanders recently applied a concept that he believes has saved the world while attending a frat party in early February.

“It just made a lot of sense, and actually, it’s probably one of the most meaningful contributions I’ll ever make in my life,” he said. the Alpha Kappa Crappa house, he started thinking about something that had never crossed his mind like, wow. That was a great beer.

I’m kind of sad that I don’t have it anymore; it was special.”

As he was relishing in his thenempty beer can, Dirk explained he decided that, instead of dropping it was going to respect it. It gave me

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something, and I decided that it would only be fair if I could give back in some way. So I went over to an empty green bin and dropped it in.”

An anonymous witness said at the party Dirk stopped the music in order to gather attention for his achievement. “He climbed on top of one of the couches and started jumping. And then he was like: ‘Hey dudes, I just recycled my can, so don’t worry the world’s not going to end as soon as we think! I’ve saved it, you are all welcome, be free.’”

Unfortunately, the witness said people were too busy disrespecting their surroundings to actually care about Dirk recycling his beer can.

However, scientists from the Commission of Sustainable Integrity noted the green bin that the beer can was dropped off in was not single-stream, meaning that, because of Dirk’s reckless recycling,

everything in the bin that could have been recycled will now be forced decomposing garbage.

Don Thomas, executive director of the commission said: “We actually did a study that traced where the can would go if it was recycled correctly.

It turns out that that same can would most likely be made into other beer cans, with a high likelihood of making it back into Dirk’s hands given how much beer he consumes in a week.” In any case, Dirk and his beer can prove to be very much where it belongs. ___________________________________ Michele Hau is a freshman culture and communications major who knows there is no thrill quite like composting. You can email her at mhau@ithaca.edu.

Really Blowing Up

Obama ushers in new pro basketball team

Tylor Colby, Staff Writer

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from the press for all he has to deal with.

“It’s a very stressful time for our country — for me,” Obama said. “With ISIS conducting terrorist attacks, making threats and changing their name every two weeks. I really just wanted to decompress for a while and talk about my other endeavors, you know, on the homefront.”

Obama continued, saying the name mix up between the JV team and the extremely volatile terrorist group “was probably the reason they changed their name to ISIL in the The team’s website, LosAngelesISISes.net, contains a full synopsis of the group, including team rosters, game photos and even information on the sex scandals of various players. According to the website, the team was founded in 1952 at Los Angeles Valley College, long before most people were born or old enough to remember such things.

Virgil Watson, head coach of LA Valley College’s other basketball team, the Monarchs, said he is excited about all the buzz the team has brought the school, although it overshadows his work with the Monarchs.

“On one hand, you got all these star athletes applying to LAVC,” Watson said. “But on the other hand you have guys on my team asking me to put in a good word with the ISISes’ recruiting team. I’ve never even met those people.”

Due to their increased popularity following Obama’s announcement, the psychotic group ISIL is seeing a decrease in applicants. This may actually slow the organization’s progress in terrorizing people all across the world.

As a result, conservatives and liberals alike are applauding the president for his newest executive order. One of his harshest critics,

notoriously inaccurate news show host Bill O’Reilly, said Obama’s focus on the ISISes, rather than ISIS, is something even he can’t disagree with.

“They asked me to criticize his move as authoritarian, and only spin this against him. Everyone loves a good rags-to-riches sports story, and I think this might be the his presidency.”

Kobe Bryant, 17-time All-star member of the Los Angeles Lakers, said he had no idea about the ISISes either, but looks forward to seeing how they fare in the professional league.

“I’ve never even heard of these guys,” Bryant said. “No offense, but they’re gonna have to step their game up if they really wanna blow up in the Los Angeles community.”

Reports from the Pentagon show ISIL is beginning to dwindle to nothing. Leaders of the regime have failed to comment. ___________________________________ Tylor Colby is a junior writing major who is giving up on his dreams of joining ISIS and is trying out for the basketball team instead. You can email him at tcolby1@ithaca.edu.

Sawdust

n the fall of 2016, little-known junior varsity basketball team the Los Angeles ISISes will make the switch to pro ball, and for that Americans can thank President Barack Obama.

After facing harsh criticisms for his comments referring to the Islamic terrorist group ISIS as al-Qaeda’s “JV” team, the President said he was grossly misinterpreted. In last week’s news brief, Obama revealed the true nature of his words. He said with his new executive order, the Los Angeles ISISes — the president’s favorite underdog basketball team — will be inaugurated into the NBA two seasons from now.

Obama said the ISISes have long been an esteemed JV basketball team, one deserving of the same level of attention our country is currently giving to the big league terrorist organization of the same name.

“I know you may not have heard of the Los Angeles ISISes, like ever,” Obama said, “But they have been slowly making their way through the ranks, and a few of them even signed with the Lakers. I think it’s time they deserve a shot in the NBA.” When asked why no one had heard about the JV team until right after Obama’s controversy, Josh Earnest, United States Press Secretary, said we were all just not paying attention.

“The Los Angeles ISISes have always been the underdog JV team in California,” Earnest said. “So much so that you all assumed the president was spouting otherwise completely ignorant nonsense, but I assure you we have things under control.”

One reporter at the brief was unconvinced, asking how the President had confused the interviewer’s question about alQaeda with a question about basketball. In response, president Obama asked for understanding

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Men Are Pigs

BUZZSAW ASKS WHY…

John Jacobson, Social Media Editor

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new study has been released, stating men are irrevocably, incorrigibly pigs. Ida Knoen, a professor and researcher at the Cornell School of Agriculture, led the experiment with a radical thesis comparing the genetic and physical structures of cisgender human men and pigs.

“The results were statistically astounding,” Knoen said. “Recent experiments within swines yielded a peculiar strand of DNA. Further experimentation led me to believe that their DNA had similar properties to the DNA found in human males.”

According to Knoen, the shared physical attributes as well as behavioral patterns.

“During behavioral analysis, we discovered that human males and pigs both share habits of laziness and sty-like behavior,” she said.

“The curvature of the human male nose is similar in structure to that of a pig’s snout. Pigs traditionally

BUZZSAW: The Nasty Issue

mushrooms. Our equivalent would remote or dropped cheese doodles.”

Debbi Macalister, owner of Pigs for Promise in Boulder, Colorado, was not surprised about this discovery.

“When pigs are overheated, they roll in mud to cool down. Have you ever paid attention to men? As soon as they think they’re hot shit, they roll in the mud until you can’t stand ‘em anymore. At least the pigs appreciate you when you feed them.”

Knoen’s research has gone public and has been met with some community, most notably from men.

“She’s a hack who probably slept her way through grad school,” said one Pulitzer-winning male scientist.

Following his comment, the scientist proceeded to oink and eat from a

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trough of pig feed. determined how men are able to maintain the diets of pigs. “Reports of excessive food consumption have always been associated with human males,” Knoen said. “We believe the shared swine DNA strands may affect the performance of stomach enzymes and internal organs.”

Public groups have vocalized outrage against this new study and its appearance in the media.

One such group, HuMen, formerly known as the Humanoid Meninists, protested Knoen’s appearances at conferences across the country.

HuMen spokesman Phil Napoleon led the most recent protest at the Fem-STEM conference in February.

“Men are not pigs. Feminist propaganda has always been out to devalue our experiences. Now they’ve invaded one of our most hallowed to spit out lies that denounce our humanist truths of self-experience,” said Napoleon.

Knoen was not alarmed by the presence of protesters at her event.

“Men have always been pigs. Wives have reported hearing oinking coming from their sleeping husbands since The Feminine Mystique. Bell Hooks and Audre Lorde have discussed misogyny and how it’s as invasive as have concrete evidence for why every encounter with men makes us feel like taking a long shower and frying up a pan of misandrist bacon.”

Knoen is currently in talks to turn her research into a motivational speaking series and a feature documentary. HuMen protesters were asked about this, but they were too busy rolling in mud to comment. ___________________________________ John Jacobson is a sophomore integrated marketing communications major who has discovered a new meaning to Animal Farm. You can email them at jjacobs@ithaca.edu.

Women can’t be nasty From our bowel movements to our attitudes, women are constantly being told we can’t be nasty.

Well, why the fuck not?

Being a woman doesn’t stop me from being a human (even if society would like to tell me otherwise), and as such I burp, shit and tell people to fuck off just as much as any man. Not to mention the fact that — SURPRISE! — I have body hair, too! Golly, what a thought.

Shaming women for taking care of their most basic needs or desires is not atypical for the patriarchy, seeing as how it wants to control our every move to make sure we stay in its entirely arbitrary lines, but that won’t stop me from running my mouth about it (and using as many “fuck”s and “shit”s as I want). products like PooPourri (with the ingenious slogan “Girls Don’t Poop”), shave off all my body hair and smile sweetly and comply instead of telling off the assholes who try to walk all over me. I mean, society knows what’s best for me, right? If I don’t follow its oppressive, heteronormative rules and regulations, there’s a chance no man (regardless of my sexual orientation) will ever want to bed me. And if that doesn’t happen, I’ll never be able to pump out babies and put my “inherent” maternal instincts to use! Who could live like that?

Your nasty, horrible, cootieinfested Sawdust Editor, Grace Rychwalski

WE EXIST

ONLINE

WWW.BUZZSAWMAG.ORG BLOG OF THE MONTH The Feminist Files: Sex “Mis”education

by Jamie Swinnerton

“Our country is getting screwed and doesn’t even know how to put on a condom.” http://www.buzzsawmag.org/category/blog/

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www.facebook.com/BuzzsawMagazine

@buzzsawmag

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