Manology

5 Habits of Great Adult Male Friendships

Friends are one of the

most important parts of a fulfilling life—so why do so many men find themselves without any real ones? Hollywood and pop culture portray male friendships as effortless bromances built on downing beers, watching football games, and picking up chicks. But in reality, many of these connections go about as deep as a puddle during a drought. Having beer buddies, football pals, and a workout companion is nice—but at the end of the day do they have what it takes when you need them the most? Here’s everything you need to know to forge a friendship that survives all of life’s challenges.

1. Great Male Friendships Don’t Just Run Shoulder-To-Shoulder, But Also Face-To-Face

Many men mistake “activity buddies” for genuine friends. Most of our friendships revolve around doing something together. Watching football, going fishing, or hitting the gym. But if you want to build a genuine connection, you need to be together once in a while. Instead of focusing on the activity, focus on each other. Talk. Share. Ask questions. Don’t distract yourself from the conversation.

2. Great Male Friendships Provide A Space To Share Without Judgment

For a lot of men, opening up is harder than getting your girlfriend to decide where she wants to eat. Men often lack the space to talk about their struggles, and the toxic culture of “real men don’t cry” only encourages us to stuff down our feelings.

BY ADAM BAILEY BY ADAM BAILEY

This isn’t healthy. If you never vent about the stress at work, the fight with your girlfriend, or your difficult relationship with your parents—it will eat you up from the inside. There’s only so much a man can take before he breaks. Great friends encourage you to share. They know that sometimes you need support even if you don’t ask and don’t think any lesser of you for it. They just hold the space. Care for them, listen without judgment, and give your thoughts and share your experiences where appropriate.

3. Great Male Friendships Value Brutal Honesty, Even If It Hurts

Sometimes, the best thing a friend can do is to say what you don’t want to hear, but need to hear.

The truth is most people aren’t completely honest with you. Their social conditioning and natural tendency to

avoid conflict make them sugarcoat their words. While this avoid conflict make them sugarcoat their words. While this makes you feel better, it doesn’t get you anywhere. Whether you’ve got a substance abuse problem, got stuck in the Whether you’ve got a substance abuse problem, got stuck in the wrong relationship, or are otherwise going full speed on the wrong relationship, or are otherwise going full speed on the ruin-your-life-highway, good friends will tell you what you need ruin-your-life-highway, good friends will tell you what you need to hear. True, your friends are old enough to make their own decisions, but the least you can do is be honest with them. Try to save them but the least you can do is be honest with them. Try to save them from their dumbest mistakes, just like they would do for you. from their dumbest mistakes, just like they would do for you.

4. Great Male Friends Are There For Each Other When It Counts

Nothing is worse than a friend who is never there when you need Nothing is worse than a friend who is never there when you need them. If you’ve ever been down and in dire need of a supporting them. If you’ve ever been down and in dire need of a supporting shoulder, but all you heard was the sound of crickets, you know shoulder, but all you heard was the sound of crickets, you know what I’m talking about. Often, it doesn’t even take much. A quick text. One beer together Often, it doesn’t even take much. A quick text. One beer together after work. A genuine hug. An invite to hang out. That’s all it after work. A genuine hug. An invite to hang out. That’s all it takes to make a guy feel that he’s not alone. takes to make a guy feel that he’s not alone.

5. They Encourage Each Other

The wrong people will pull you down, the right ones will help The wrong people will pull you down, the right ones will help you rise above. If you want to become the best man you can be, you have to build the right tribe. To put it simply, great friends you have to build the right tribe. To put it simply, great friends will always encourage you to become the best man you can be, regardless of where they stand.