Fall 2011:
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Caring for others means caring for you, too
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COLUMN BY CHRISTINA KUNKLE, CERTIFIED LIFE AND WELLNESS COACH, R.N.
here are only four kinds of people in this world: those who have been caregivers, those who currently are caregivers, those who will be caregivers and those who will need caregivers.” — Rosalynn Carter
“What are the biggest challenges you face as a caregiver that keep you from feeling at your best every day?” I asked while speaking to a group that had come to enjoy “Caregiver Get-away Day,” a much-needed and well-deserved opportunity to relax, get inspired and re-energized. As they took turns sharing their struggles, many through tears of frustration, it became obvious that these heart-centered caregivers not
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only appreciated the chance to be heard but also the bond that was forming between them. Among the top responses were feelings of exhaustion from being “on call” at night, stress due to medical and financial decisions, isolation from friends and lack of freedom, feeling overwhelmed when trying to balance self-care with caregiving responsibilities and helplessness related to not being able to control whether the patient would indeed recover. In addition, they felt guilty whenever they left to take time for themselves, especially when the patient pushed back against anyone else helping them. Chances are you see yourself as a caregiver in some way. Maybe you’re not a professional nurturer such as a nurse, doctor, health care or holistic health professional, but you fill a nurturing role within your career such as home health aide or social worker. Perhaps you are one of the 65 million American adults that nurture others in your personal life by caring for an aging family member, spouse, a child with special needs or friend with chronic medical problems. Research done by the National Alliance of Caregiving shows that in almost a third of American households, someone is serving as an unpaid