Capilano Courier | Vol. 49, Issue 2.

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VOLUME 49 ISSUE 02

STORM SURGE

GOING ELECTRIC

CapU Facilities department reflects on emergency preparedness after power outage.

Gas-free transportation gains momentum as affordable vehicle options enter the market.

SEPTEMBER 14 - 20 | 2015

THE BC FIRE FIGHT

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CONTENTS

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01

02

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

ADDING FUEL TO THE FIRE

03

LIGHTS OUT

06

Cover Art

Editor's Desk

News

News

08

10

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07

Arts & Culture

Humour

ZED ALEXANDRA

SEPTEMBER 14 - 20

Calendar

INTO THE WILD

Features

FRINGE BINGE

FIGHTING FENTANYL

A LETTER FROM CHAD

THE STAFF STAFF THIS ISSUE COURIER COLUMNISTS Andy Rice

Therese Guieb

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

EXECUTIVE NEWS EDITOR

Carlo Javier

Gabe Scorgie

EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE EDITOR

FEATURES EDITOR

Kevin Kapenda

Mark Crickmay

OPINIONS EDITOR

ARTS + CULTURE EDITOR

FRED ULRICH JR. Fred Ulrich Jr., commonly known to the staff as F-U2, is a disgruntled alcoholic who once achieved his 15 minutes of fame playing the accordion for a now-defunct band whose name we cannot publish due to, uh, standards. In this column, he’ll be talking about things that society just might be too caught up on. So he’ll be talking about a lot of things.

LEAH SCHEITEL

Christine Beyleveldt

Alva Tang

CAMPUS CORRESPONDENT

COMMUNITY RELATIONS MANAGER

Cristian Fowlie

Syd Danger

ART DIRECTOR

PRODUCTION MANAGER

Tianyi Bao

Brandon Kostinuk

BUSINESS MANAGER

WEB EDITOR

THE CAPILANO COURIER

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

CONTRIBUTORS FAYE ALEXANDER

MEGAN COLLINSON

LEAH SCHEITEL

ZED ALEXANDRA

JAMES MARTIN

WINDCOAST PHOTOGRAPHY

KATHERINE GILLARD AND CHAD

SCOTT BARKEMEYER PAUL BOICI DANIELLE MAINMAN JAMES SAVILLE KZENIA KOZHEVNIKOVA VIVIAN LI

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Leah Scheitel is really quite the polymath. She flew under the radar as one of the top students in the CapU business program last year, is a former triathlon superstar and knows the histories of both Saturday Night Live and each of the American secretaries of state by heart. However, in this column, she’ll talk about the two things she loves best — politics and men.

SABRINA KUHN Props to Sabrina Kuhn for being the most eager columnist of the year! Bonus points for being the first one to apply! After spending some time last year writing for the Courier to fulfill the obligations of the Arts and Entertainment Management program mandate, Sabrina is now writing without the requirements of her professor.

CARISSA KONESKY Our newest column will feature members of Capilano University’s international education community. Each writer will come from a different culture and each of them will talk about their experiences being immersed in a society much different from where they came from. This week, we’ll be starting with Carissa Konesky from Burnaby.

THE CAPILANO COURIER is an autonomous, democratically-run student newspaper. Literary and visual submissions are welcomed. All submissions are subject to editing for brevity, taste and legality. The Capilano Courier will not publish material deemed by the collective to exhibit sexism, racism or homophobia. The views expressed by the contributing writers are not necessarily those of the Capilano Courier Publishing Society.

EDITOR'S DESK

@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

ADDING FUEL TO THE FIRE Andy Rice EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Next time a website goes down, the power is knocked out or you can’t drive to your favourite camping destination because the highway is literally being swallowed by a ball of flames, take a second to think of the people whose job it is to piece your definition of normal back together.

Not only do these individuals have the thankless task of restoring whatever it is that went wrong in the world that day or that month or that year, but they’re probably not doing it fast enough in your eyes. In fact, they’ll never be doing it fast enough.

Don’t get me wrong. Sitting at home in the dark trying to roast large quantities of deep-freezer meat over a half a dozen miniature tea-light candles is a huge pain in the ass. While I don’t aim to discount any pain and suffering that may have brought to you and your family this summer, I’d also like to remind you that someone else was 50 feet up in the air in a thunderstorm trying not to die on the job as they worked feverishly to turn your lights back on.

Those forest fires that were shown on the news every night searing holes into the BC wilderness were battled every day by thousands of people just like you. Each of those men and women were a walking Workers' Compensation Board claim waiting to happen, and they knew it. The dangers of these jobs are all too severe, but not as severe as the judgement and sheer sense

of entitlement our society now thrusts upon them in the media, on the Internet and around the office water cooler.

If a forest fire burns in 2015, somehow the firefighters are the idiots who let it spread or the morons who don’t have a clue what it’s like to actually live in the eye of a fire because they’ve been flown in from opposite ends of the country.

If the power goes out in 2015, somehow BC Hydro should be obligated to grant customers free power for a month and take them by the hand to the grocery store to replace the rotting contents of their fridges.

According to many of the comments I’ve read online this month, that’s where we’ve arrived as a human race. Somewhere along the way it became acceptable to seek reimbursement from hydro companies over spoiled meat following a storm.

I have to say, I’m not certain it’s the meat that’s spoiled here.

It’s all too easy to bitch and moan from the comfort of an armchair. We do it after elections, we do it after the playoffs and we do it after natural disasters. But can’t we harness even a fraction of this outrage for the greater good?

No, we can’t. Or at least we shouldn’t.

Some people are, believe it or not, better off as Internet trolls, keeping a safe distance and using their computer screens as shields. They’re better off not understanding how the world works and they’re better off not knowing the people on the front lines. Besides, I’m pretty

sure the firefighters and hydro workers wouldn’t want to meet them anyways.

Positivity and perspective go a long way in the face of adversity, but not everyone has those traits.

I was talking to somebody about this just the other day as I interviewed her about some negative feedback she’d received regarding a festival she was organizing. “Can you imagine what could be accomplished if all these naysayers just showed up to give you a hand for even one hour?” I said as she was getting into her car to leave.

“Yes, but I don’t need those people,” she responded. “I need positive people.

Negative people are better off staying at home. They don’t want you to succeed. If you succeed then what will they have to complain about?”

She was right. Some people don’t want the fire to be extinguished. Some people don’t want the power to go back on. Their fire and their power is watching someone else struggle.

Don’t be one of those people.

What is with this fancy Compass Card bullshit?

Now I have to remember to upload it each month...

THE VOICEBOX with Carlo Javier

What happened to the babe with the messed up teeth? She was the only reason I ever read the paper…

She got new teeth and moved on to bigger and brighter things.

Get over it.

How big was your bird’s cage? It covered the floor of my bird’s cage just fine and I have a rare Red-fronted Macaw I got from my soul-searching trip in Central Bolivia.

It’s supposed to be Translink’s new way of decreasing paper production and making your daily commute more convenient, because a piece of reusable plastic that you have to tap in and tap out every single time is really going to make things more convenient than, say, more frequent Skytrain and bus operations?

And for students, ya’ll be uploading these stinking cards every single time you get them from the vending machine. Good luck!

THE CAPILANO COURIER

Why was the first issue so short? It wasn't even enough to cover the floor of my bird’s cage…

TWEETS OF THE WEEK

Do you have any secret spots on campus?

I can’t tell you that.

Can someone describe why an Oxford comma exists? That shit is annoying when you get marks deducted.

We don’t use the Oxford comma in the Courier. In fact, we don’t give a fuck about an Oxford comma.

Oh yeah, we’ll blow you outta the water.

The Voicebox is back! If you have any questions, concerns or any other bitchin’ to do, text it over to our boy Carlo at 778-865-2649.

“Please text me,” he says. “No one else does.”

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VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

The Oxford comma is a purely optional literary device that always comes before the conjugation in a list. Theoretically, it’s meant to help prevent confusion in the meaning of a sentence.

Any plans on not sucking this year?

NEWS

@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

LIGHTS OUT

Power surge shuts down CapU for a day Christine Beyleveldt CAMPUS CORRESPONDENT

On Aug. 31, a massive storm swept across the Lower Mainland downing power in many areas including Capilano University. BC Hydro called the situation “the single largest outage event” it had ever seen, and as the corporation worked around the clock in response to calls and incidents, the University was left to fend for itself.

When the power was first downed on campus, backup power generators kicked in, only to fail moments later. “It was a simple mechanical failure,” said Susan Doig, director of facilities at CapU. Crews from multiple departments worked to repair the backup system so the University could function until BC Hydro was able to restore all power.

Servers were down for most of the day on campus and because the University’s website is hosted on campus-based servers, it was offline as well.

“It took a long time but I think that the IT services team and facilities worked incredibly hard together,” said Doig.

Although the University was able to resume operations after only one day, the question many have in mind is whether CapU would be ready if a bigger storm hits.

According to Doig, if another storm were to cut the power on campus while classes or exams were in session, the impact would be much larger but procedures wouldn’t change.

Facilities operates on an “All Hazards Approach”, meaning that CapU is equipped to handle even the most drastic emergencies. “We are currently reviewing

rupted power supply (UPS) which fed the generators that kept the University functioning for a short period of time after the lights went out.

Coping with a loss of power isn’t the only thing Vancouverites are learning to deal with in such scenarios. The windstorm ripped up hundreds of trees, sending debris flying, damaging property and causing critical injury to a number of people. Further south in Washington, the Seattle Times even reported deaths.

While CapU managed to escape with minimal damage and debris, the biggest problem that arose during the Aug. 31 storm was that with no power there was no connectivity between departments and security was impossible to reach, making the grounds unsafe.

It is Doig’s hope that a new mobile app will alleviate some of those issues in the future, should a power outage of that magnitude occur again.

Just in time for the Capilano University Street Party (CUSP) and new student orientation, the Facilities department launched the CapU Safe App in support of better emergency preparedness.

The app sports a flashlight, alarm, tracking chip and a feed by which one can report suspicious activity or damage occurring on campus. “It’s a more orderly approach, it gives us the ability to send an alert,” said Doig.

The Facilities department recommends that all students familiarize themselves with emergency procedures, which are available at Capilanou.ca/safety-security.

what our procedures are and refining protocol,” said Doig. “A couple of years ago we created a second manager in facilities to support emergency preparedness.”

Last year, $250,000 of the University’s

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VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

budget went towards creating the uninter-

SIGNS DOWN

Collective agreement holds CFA until 2019 Christine Beyleveldt CAMPUS CORRESPONDENT In April, the Capilano Faculty Association (CFA) locked horns with the Capilano University administration resulting in a school-wide strike. For students, that meant a reduced exam schedule and limited time to prepare due to cancelled classes and workshops. For faculty, it meant the reduction of wages and repeated hard bargaining.

Faculty who went on strike reported growing concerns over academic freedom, program cuts and drawbacks, wages and paid leave, appropriate representation on committees that hired deans and on faculty evaluations performed by students. As of June 25, the strike drew to its conclusion as a deal was settled upon between the CFA and the University.

Under the Economic Stability Mandate, roughly 775 faculty members have been affected by the agreement, and an overall number of 230,000 union workers across the province have been afforded a settlement under the new ratified agreement. The University has agreed to a review of the regularization process, “the process by which regular faculty positions are created at the University,” said

Parveen Mann, the chief negotiator for the CFA. There have also been changes to the health care provided to faculty — “a 25 per cent increase in extended health deductible,” noted Mann. Faculty have accepted the terms that wages will rise an estimated 5.5 per cent over the next five years. On the other hand, it is difficult for the University to take into consideration the demands submitted by the CFA when CapU is currently on the receiving end of the lowest financial budget of any post-secondary institution in BC. The term of the collective agreement is set to last until 2019 before further review will take place.for Terry’s Cause which cost the CSU $1,000. On the same day, the CSU will be hosting an event called Change the Conversation to promote the supporters that keep CapU running. Attendees include alumni, faculty, local government officials and students.

The event will cost $1,080 to run.

On Oct. 6 and 7, the CSU will be hosting a student film festival in cooperation with the Film Program at CapU. $1,570 will be spent by the CSU for the event.

SQUAMISH CAMPUS MOVES

Highway improvements blamed for enrolment decline Andy Rice EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Capilano University’s satellite campus in Squamish has relocated.

The move comes after several years of declining enrolment due to a Sea-to-Sky highway upgrade that improved access to the North Shore and Downtown areas prior to the 2010 Olympics.

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As of August, the University has been operating out of a rented space located at 1343 Winnipeg Street, adjacent to a popular sushi restaurant. The former campus is now being leased to a French immersion school in the area through an agreement that “will generate revenue for Capilano University and result in significant cost savings, further allowing the University to develop and enhance future programming that will meet the needs of the Squamish commu-

nity,” according to a press release issued near the time of the move.

Capilano University also owns six hectares of land near the waterfront on which former president Greg Lee expressed intentions for development back in 2008, though they never materialized.

At that time, the campus boasted 180 students. Today, there are approximately 60, split between the Business Certificate and Advanced Wilderness Leadership programs.

SQUAMISH CAMPUS TIMELINE: 1973: FIRST CLASSES HELD IN BASEMENT OF LOCAL RESIDENT. 1979: FIRST CAMPUS OPENS ON SECOND AVENUE. 1995: CAMPUS MOVES TO CARSON PLACE. 2015: CAMPUS MOVES TO WINNIPEG STREET.

NEWS

THERESE GUIEB

EXECUTIVE NEWS EDITOR NEWS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

PRICE OF CONNECTIVITY

CSU launches app costing $21,000 from student fees Therese Guieb EXECUTIVE NEWS EDITOR

With the intent of increasing social connectivity among students on campus, the Capilano Students’ Union (CSU) made its own mobile app.

“We can make a platform that unifies all information where it’s just one place where the students go to look for all the events and a place for students to be able to talk to one another,” said Sacha Fabry, vice president of university relations of the CSU. Last September, Fabry presented to the CSU board of directors the possible benfits of creating an app to be available to students, faculty and staff at Capilano University.

The CSU signed with OOH LALA, a company that designs apps for post-secondary institutions. The deal cost the CSU $21,000 for a three-year contract with the company. The app was already live and ready to download during the summer semester, however, the CSU withheld its hard launch until the first week of the fall semester. This gave the opportunity for the CSU to finalize features and information available on the app.

On Sept. 8, the CSU officially launched the app, targeting first-year students to download it during the GooseChase game during the new student orientation. “We’ve also got promotional strategies throughout September and October,” noted Fabry. “I’ve set ourselves a goal of having 50 per cent download rates by the end of October,” he said. Given the cur-

rent enrolment, 50 per cent would amount to around 3,000 CapU students.

Some of the app features include CSU and campus event listings, GPS directions, club and committee information, courses and schedule, an academic calendar, private campus social network, student profiles, a student discount platform and many more.

“It’s one giant Facebook group like What’s App on your iPhone. You can schedule your timetable and much more [through the app] and it is easier than using the Capilano app or going to the CSU website all the time,” commented Taylor Wilson, vice president of external relations at the CSU. Although the CSU app was created to be

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VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

Grab a slice, help us out.

Quorum is 15. Pizza is delicious.

things we put forward in this app is to make it changeable and we can update it as the years go by.”

OOH LALA is being used by several post-secondary student associations and organizations across North America including McGill University, UBC, Royal Roads University and Douglas College.

The app is available for download by searching for “Capilano Students’ Union” in the Google Play Store or the Apple Store.

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PEPPERONI CHEESE VEGETARIAN MEAT LOVERS’ HAWAIIAN MEDITERRANEAN DEMOCRACY.

a handy resource for students, it has also raised questions about how much money has been allocated to it.

“I feel like the only way to get a good ROI [return on investment] on this would be to get as many students as possible onto this app, since this is a huge cost,” said Zainab Tayyab, a Communications student at CapU. According to Tayyab, easy access to student services such as Moodle is just one of the features that the app is lacking.

“I guess the primary concern is that maybe in five years it [the app] will be obsolete. I mean, it could end up being like MySpace,” said Wilson of the risks of investing in the app. “At the same time, I think one of the

NEWS

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FENTANYL, AN OPIATE ON THE RISE Deaths increase in Vancouver due to drug Katherine Gillard CONTRIBUTOR

Fentanyl, a synthetic opiate narcotic known for being 50 to 100 times more toxic than morphine, is on the rise in Vancouver. According to a recent bulletin by the Canadian Community Epidemiology Network on Drug Use (CCENDU), fentanyl-related deaths have increased almost sevenfold in the province, going from 13 deaths in 2012 to 90 in 2014. On Aug. 9, there were 16 suspected overdoses including six deaths in a one-hour period.

Derived from the poppy plant, fentanyl is a cousin of heroin and is typically prescribed by doctors in patch form for pain relief in cancer patients. Illicitly, fentanyl is often found mixed with other drugs that come in liquid or pill form such as heroin, oxycodone and cocaine.

“Pills or powders containing illicitlymanufactured fentanyl are especially dangerous because there is no quality control or regulated manufacturing process,” said Tiffany Akins, media representative for Vancouver Coastal Health. ”These drugs

may contain toxic contaminants or have different levels of fentanyl in each batch. Even pills produced in the same batch may have little to lethal levels of fentanyl.”

Some people may not even realize that they are taking fentanyl if they are recreational drug users because it has been laced in other drugs.

“It’s not so much hidden, it’s that the illicit drugs that people are experiencing negative consequences from are drugs that are manufactured by organized crime so they may be what we call illicit or fake oxycodone and in the manufacturing of that oxycodone fentanyl is put in there,” added Cpl. Richard

ADVOCATING FOR STUDENT RIGHTS CSU joins other student unions in lobbying issues Therese Guieb

THE CAPILANO COURIER

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

EXECUTIVE NEWS EDITOR

In May 2011, a coalition was formed by the student associations of four post-secondary institutions in BC. Among them were the Capilano Students’ Union (CSU), UBC Alma Mater Society, University of Fraser Valley Students Union and University of Victoria Students’ Society. The coalition was called Alliance of British Columbia Students (ABCS), a nonpartisan and not-for-profit organization.

In the past, the CSU had worked with another organization federally and provincially. According to Taylor Wilson, vice president of external relations at CSU, the Union had “poor experiences” with that organization which expedited their decision to co-create the ABCS to advocate provincially.

“We started off without any membership fees or anything,” said Wilson. “It was sort of a loose coalition that focused in campaigns and just went from there.”

As stated on the ABCS website, the campaigns that the organization has produced include lobbying the provincial government to re-instate a provincial needsbased grants program, eliminate interest on student loans and increase core funding to post-secondary institutions.

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With nine student associations now on board as members, the ABCS recently implemented an annual fee to help cover administration costs. “This is the first year we’ve asked for them and the first year we have established a bank account just because, like I say, it was such a loose coalition but now we’re actually looking into getting an executive director,” noted Wilson.

Membership fees are based on the student population of the post-secondary institution that each student association represents. The CSU pays an estimated $12,000 to the Alliance. “We pay 70 per cent by October then we pay 30 per cent next semester,” said Wilson.

If the CSU decides to leave the ABCS, the CSU can immediately leave through a board resolution. According to Wilson, since Capilano University is a smaller institution compared to UBC and UVIC, it is not treated equally by the provincial government. As a member of the ABCS, the CSU hopes it will be able to lobby equally with bigger institutions.

For more information on the ABCS, visit bcstudents.ca.

De Jong from North Vancouver RCMP. According to De Jong, people have also died after overdosing by extracting the drug from patches and smoking it. “In that case, you have two problems — you have the fentanyl that is extracted and used in the pharmaceutical grade of it and you also have fentanyl which is now showing up in the illicit drug production,” he said.

Without a prescription from a doctor it is impossible for a person to know their tolerance, and first-time drug users are at a much higher risk of overdose if they take fentanyl. Although users may not be seeking fentanyl, there is no way to know for

CSU BRIEFS

sure if their drugs are pure or not.

De Jong speculated on the recent rise of fentanyl: “When pharmaceutical companies made it harder to make OxyContin available, fentanyl became the substitute, if you will,” he said. “The unfortunate thing is that it is much stronger and people die quite quickly from it.”

With the recent death of a young North Vancouver couple this summer as well as a young man who died last year after buying drugs at Lonsdale Quay, the drug has clearly made its way into Capilano University’s community.

“We’re no different than any other community. We’re not immune to it, we have drug users but we also have great resources in the community,” said De Jong.

Overdose signs include severe fatigue, trouble breathing, clammy skin, slow heartbeat and trouble walking or talking. There is no way to test drugs for fentanyl outside of a lab. Atkins added that you can’t smell it, taste it or see it, but if your drugs are mixed with fentanyl it may kill you. The only sure way to avoid the drug is to abstain from buying illegal opiates.

Sept. 4 Board Meeting

Therese Guieb EXECUTIVE NEWS EDITOR On Sept. 4, the Capilano Students’ Union

nadian Union of Public Employees (CUPE)

(CSU) had their first board of directors

1004 are now active. Some of these include

meeting of the semester. There are still va-

the enrolment of the family assistance pro-

cant positions at the CSU which include the

gram, enrolment of staff for pension plan

First Nations student liaison, International

and new pay rates.

Student liaison, Students of Colour liaison

Zachary Thompson, a Capilano Univer-

and the Arts and Sciences Faculty represen-

sity Senate representative, has taken a

tative. They will be open for nomination later

leave until Sept. 15. He will miss two meet-

this month for the CSU’s bi-election.

ings of the senate. As a result, if he misses

One of the main campaigns of the CSU

another he will be stripped of his position.

this semester is their Get Out the Vote

The CSU has purchased hand sanitiz-

campaign. Taylor Wilson, vice president of

ers for both CSU lounges at a total cost of

external relations at the CSU, has teamed

$750. The move was in promotion of the

up with the Canadian Alliance of Students’

CSU Health & Dental Plan.

Association (CASA) to create it. Their main

On Sept. 24, the Human Kinetics Pro-

goal is to encourage students to vote in the

gram will be hosting its annual run or walk

federal election and give them sufficient in-

event. The CSU Student Life Committee

formation about how to do so.

will be sponsoring the event which has

Sacha Fabry, vice president of university

a new addition of a luncheon for Terry’s

relations, is preparing for a U-Pass referen-

Cause which cost the CSU $1,000. On the

dum that might be held this year on campus.

same day, the CSU will be hosting an event

He has also prepared a student survey that

called Change the Conversation to promote

will help the CSU to know what services are

the supporters that keep CapU running.

still needed on campus and will determine if

Attendees include alumni, faculty, local

there is need for a building fee referendum. It

government officials and students. The

is available for students at the services booth

event will cost $1,080 to run.

in the CSU Library Lounge.

On Oct. 6 and 7, the CSU will be hosting

The CSU’s general manager, Christopher

a student film festival in cooperation with

Girodat, shared that most of the items that

the Film Program at CapU. $1,570 will be

were agreed upon in the recent collective

spent by the CSU for the event.

agreement between the CSU and the Ca-

CAP YOU

CARLO JAVIER

EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE EDITOR CARLO.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

BEHIND THE NET

Former CapU volleyball star returns to coach Carlo Javier EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE EDITOR Emmanuel Denguessi had to wait his turn.

ing back home.”

cruits and the returning athletes.

Despite an impressive résumé that in-

According to an official statement by Milt

Like any member of a competitive

cludes MVP trophies during his playing days

Williams, manager of the Department of Ath-

unit, CapU’s new volleyball coach has

for both Columbia Bible College and Capilano

letics and Recreation, Denguessi’s amalgama-

a list of goals he has set both for himself

College, a top setter award at the All-Africa

tion of academic and technical knowledge with

and the team. For one, he aims to estab-

Olympic qualifying tournament and the gold

his enthusiasm for the sport is one of the main

lish a foundation that serves to help the

at the 2001 African Nation Cup, Denguessi’s

reasons for his hiring, and that academic focus is

program grow. He aims to aid the build-

first attempt to coach the Capilano University

also the root of Denguessi’s philosophy in sports

ing of consistency in the coaching position,

Blues varsity men’s volleyball squad didn’t go

in a college environment.

which in turn helps the stability of the

as planned. “You know, I applied for the posi-

“I would really emphasize the academic

team, particularly when senior players

tion, I think two years ago, and I wasn’t the

side of their life because that’s the only way I

graduate.

candidate selected,” he said.

can lose them. An injury can happen, they will

Second, he wants to emphasize to the

But with Drew Venables vacating the

still be there supporting the team, but if they

student athletes that they are ambassa-

coaching position, Denguessi will once again

don’t do well in school, they won’t even be able

dors of an institution. “When they put

get the opportunity to lead the volleyball team

to come close to the team,” he explained.

on that blue and white jersey they’re

that led as a setter back in 2007 — this time

As for the technicality of the sport, Den-

representing all of the student popula-

as their coach.

guessi hopes to relay the knowledge he’s ac-

tion, all of the institution, so try to com-

“Cap and I is a long story,” he began.

cumulated from his many years in the game

municate that message,” he said.

Born in Cameroon, Africa, Denguessi relocat-

— he was already with Africa’s Junior Na-

Finally, Denguessi hopes to help the

ized, might be a representation of the person

ed to Montreal near-

tional Team by age 16.

student athletes realize and appreciate their

he is off the court.

ly 11 years ago and

“I come from a kind of a

respective talents. “I believe every single

“Interesting enough, as a student of psy-

moved out west after

world understanding of

person has a gift, and if that happens to be

chology, I was thinking one day, how does

three years despite

volleyball,” he said. “As

playing volleyball, how could they play that

your personality reflect your position in a

barely speaking a

a player I have been in

in a way that better demonstrates who they

volleyball setting?” he presented. “I think

word of English. “It’s

acquaintance of pretty

are as a person, inside and outside Capilano

when I see where I stand in my family, one

a program that has

much a diverse range

University,” he said.

of my sisters and I were, most of the time,

always been in my

of how to play volley-

Volleyball has always been present in

advocating for peace, going to some of my

heart,” he said. “It

ball, which I intend to

Denguessi’s life. His siblings played the

brothers and speaking on behalf of my mom,

was my first intro-

communicate to the

game and the kids in his neighbourhood

coming to my mom and speaking on behalf

duction to the West

players that there are

played in the same court. His skills were

of my brother and making sure that every-

Coast kind of spirit

different ways of play-

honed at a young age, learning to volley and

one kind of has a certain harmony.

and I’ve been going

ing the game and we

manage hitting strength by playing off of

“When I look at the position of setter, as

through ups and downs in those years and the

can explore them.”

walls. His brothers wound up finding suc-

a setter you need to know all of the people

program has been a special place and they have

Although the season has yet to officially

cess with the sport, and thus providing him

that you have on your team because you’re

really adopted me since then. Even when I left

commence, Denguessi has been able to run

with an image on how he should be as an

distributing the ball to them, and also you

the program, every time I visited was like com-

some formal practices with most of the re-

athlete. That athlete, as he ultimately real-

need to know the specifics — What do they like? What is the height they prefer? What is the speed they like? So knowing them

IN SHAPE FOR THE SEMESTER Human Kinetics begin year with annual run

well, but knowing also the specifics that make this player different, and how you deliver the ball to them,” he continued.

Denguessi studied ESL at Capilano College from 2007 to 2008 and later moved to Columbia Bible College where he wound up getting a Bachelor’s Degree in caregiv-

EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE EDITOR

ing and counselling. Now, he’s managing a lus Road and Monashee Drive. The Walk/Run

netics program will be hosting its Back to

will end at the same spot as its starting point.

Cap Walk/Run to coincide with other back-

“It’s similar to last year, so the fact that

to-school festivities happening during the

people can do a walk loop of 2.5 km or run a

first month of school.

two-loop of 5k,” said Emma Russell, Human

On Sept. 24, a non-competitive walk or run

Kinetics program coordinator.

will be available to all students and employ-

The event will begin at 11:45 am and end at

ees of CapU to participate in. The route will

12:45 pm to avoid any potential class conflicts.

remain the same to what it’s been in the past

Water and draw prizes will be available.

group home for people with special needs, once again displaying the parallels between his play on the court and his life outside.

The star setter returns to CapU in a different position, but with a similar mission: to help set up others for winning plays, both on and off the court.

two iterations of the event. Participants will begin at the open space between the Cedar and Fir buildings, pass the bus loop and follow an uphill path through Skeena Road, Tanta-

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VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

For the third straight year, the Human Ki-

THE CAPILANO COURIER

Carlo Javier

CALENDAR NEWS

14 MONDAY

EIGHT-AND-A-HALF INCHES OF COMEDY

151 EAST 8TH AVENUE 9PM - 11:30PM ∙ $5 COVER

This is a weekly stand-up show hosted by local comedians Devin Alexander and Alex Sparling. I’m not sure how the eight-and-a-half inches are divided between them, but it doesn’t bode well for either one of them. The restaurant this event takes place at is also called 8½. Dicks for everybody!

MS GOLF CHALLENGE

NORTHVIEW GOLF & COUNTRY CLUB 6:30AM - 9PM ∙ $300

ANDY RICE

CALENDAR EDITOR EDITOR@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

15 TUESDAY

Although this event sounds like a cruel joke for people with multiple sclerosis, it’s actually a fundraiser for people with multiple sclerosis. I was pretty relieved to find that out.

Golfers from around BC will be treated to a VIP experience as they swing clubs from dusk until dawn.

WEDNESDAY

GOLDFISH

FORTUNE SOUND CLUB 9PM ∙ $17.50

For their eighth studio album, Primus went off the deep end and decided to cover the soundtrack of the 1971 film, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Now, they’re touring the live version in all its idiosyncratic glory. You won’t have to live in a world of pure imagination for much longer.

Kind of like the South African version of Chromeo, these guys combine live instruments with electronic effects for an energetic live show. Saxophone makes an appearance as well, along with traditional African instruments. They’ll be joined by Brooklyn synth pop artist Gibbz and Vacouver’s own Momantix. You bring the E, they’ll bring the bola.

TIME MANAGEMENT WORKSHOP

BR 265 4PM - 5PM ∙ $ YOUR PRECIOUS TIME

Here, you will learn several techniques for time management from members of Capilano University’s counselling department. Apparently they know a few tools for reducing stress and meeting deadlines. I sure could have used that during the creation of this calendar.

Just ask our production manager — this thing arrived later than Kylie Jenner’s last period.

PUNK ROCK KARAOKE

THE COBALT 8PM ∙ $13 + SERVICE FEES

17 THURSDAY

CORY WEEDS QUARTET

FRIDAY

NORDSTROM OPENS

PACIFIC CENTRE 9:30AM ∙ $ FREE, UNLESS YOU SHOP

It only took three years, but downtown Vancouver’s former flagship Sears (and hands-down ugliest building) is re-opening as a Nordstrom. The US chain is pretty high class and they spent millions on this reno, so they’d probably love it if you blew some student loan money on a new blazer.

CAMPUS PIANO SALE

SPORTSPLEX MULTIPURPOSE ROOM 10AM - 9PM ∙ $ PRIVATE LESSONS

If you listen to 102.7 The Peak at all, you’ve probably heard a Tokyo Police Club song.

The Newmarket, Ontario foursome will be headlining a show at The Imperial with special guests Van Damsel. Go see the show. Maybe they’ll let you into their club. Or, maybe they’ll just club you. Because police.

C SNA e

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

The Arts Club Theatre Company presents Disgraced, a Pulitzer prize-winning play where four people get together at a dinner party, start talking about race and politics and then metaphorically rip each other’s throats out. The main characters are all lawyers and art curators, which I assume makes them extra scrappy.

MAN MAN

Blueprint Live presents Man Man, an experimental keyboard pop duo from Philly. These guys use dumb stage names like Honus Honus and Pow Pow, which is automatic demerit points here at the Courier, but their music isn’t half bad. They also play a ton of different instruments, which might entertain you.

e

THE CAPILANO COURIER

DISGRACED

STANLEY INDUSTRIAL ALLIANCE STAGE 7:30PM ∙ $29 - $74

As one of the Capilano University jazz program’s most prominent grads, saxophonist Cory Weeds has done just about everything — he’s hosted radio shows, produced records and even owned Vancouver’s only jazz club until last year. For this show, he’ll be joined by Chris Gestrin on keys, Russ Botten on bass and Joe Poole on drums.

TOKYO POLICE CLUB

19 14 SATURDAY

DEMOCRACY CAFÉ

NORTH VANCOUVER CITY LIBRARY 10 AM TO NOON ∙ $ FREE North Vancouver City Library is hosting a series of non-partisan discussions about Canadian democracy, beginning with a crash course on how our government and elections work. Entitled Civics 101, the event is geared toward new Canadians, first-time or youth voters and people with an interest in politics.

ART DECO PHOTOWALK

DOWNTOWN 2PM ∙ $49

Bring your camera and join Vancouver Photowalks outside the Vogue Theatre on Granville Street. This two-hour stroll will zoom in on the city’s best examples of Art Deco architecture.

Although the style originated in Paris in the 1920s, many examples popped up in Vancouver too, including the Marine Building, Commodore Ballroom and Burrard Bridge.

THE DEARS

FOX CABARET 7PM ∙ $20 + SERVICE FEES These guys have been slinging it out since 1995 and have a list of past members longer than John Goodman’s grocery list. Singer Murray Lightburn remains the only constant, with his Morrissey-esque vocals still very much intact. I remember seeing them play on Letterman once. “Nice drums” was Dave’s only response.

M

MUSEUM OF VANCOUVER 2PM - 4PM ∙ $11 - $14

Larry Grant and Jill Campbell from the Musqueam First Nation will offer an introduction to the hən̓q̓ əmin̓əm̓ language and the historical, cultural and political significance behind it.

Attendees will tour an interactive exhibition connecting them with c̓ əsnaʔəm, also known as the Marpole Midden, one of the large ancient burial sites Vancouver was built upon.

FRINGE FESTIVAL FINALE

VARIOUS LOCATIONS ALL DAY ∙ $14

Ideally, you already know about the Vancouver Fringe Festival and have been gallivanting around the city all week watching shows. But, on the off chance you aren’t in the know, this is your last day to see some quirky independent theatre — and maybe some boobs too. I saw boobs last year. Really old boobs.

8

Every week, a different faculty member moderates an informal discussion over lunch. (Lunch is free pizza, by the way!) This week’s topic will be “Vancouverism” and whether or not we should be proud or worried to call this place our home. Geography professor Charles Greenberg will host the chat, which is open to all students.

VENUE 9PM ∙ $18 + SERVICE CHARGES

THE IMPERIAL 8PM ∙ $36.75

SUNDAY

CHATLIVE: “VANCOUVERISM”

LB 188 11:30AM - 12:30PM ∙ FREE

GUILT & CO. 8:30PM ∙ $5

The folks at Loewen Piano House have been lending pianos to Capilano University’s music department for decades and this is the annual sale of everything that’s been used and abused in the Fir building over the past year. Discounted prices are available to employees, students and alumni.

20

FIND A JOB YOU’LL LOVE

LB 186 11:30AM - 12:30PM ∙ FREE

MALKIN BOWL 5:30PM ∙ $65 TO $90

Timbre Concerts presents Punk Rock Karaoke, featuring a live band that includes members of Adolescents, Social Distortion, NOFX, Bad Religion, The Dickies and Goldfinger.

Apparently the Cobalt has done this since 1996 and people love it. I wonder if Therese would be into this. I’ll print her out some lyrics.

18

This is perhaps the most misleading name for a head shave that I’ve ever seen, but it’s for a fantastic cause. Trained professionals from Textura Salon will chop away your shining locks to raise money for the Terry Fox Foundation. I’m going to send Carlo over with a pocketful of cash.

Capilano University’s Student Employment Services department is hosting a workshop on career choices. At it, they will teach you how to research potential career paths and have something super fulfilling lined up long before you ever make that ceremonial walk though the Sportsplex with your degree.

PRIMUS & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY

16

GREAT CANADIAN HAIR “DO”

RH LEE ALUMNI CENTRE, UBC 10AM - 1PM∙ $ YOUR NEW PERM

FRINGE FESTIVAL FINALE

FEATURES NEWS

GABE SCORGIE

FEATURES EDITOR SPECIALFEATURES.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

ELECTRIC AVENUE

The emergence of eco-friendly transportation Christine Beyleveldt CAMPUS CORRESPONDENT

Imagine never having to stop at a gas station again. It’s an appealing idea. Not only is petroleum expensive for a resource we are so dependent on, but it also contributes to polluting the atmosphere. As evidenced by the Lower Mainland’s extreme drought conditions this summer, the weather patterns of the world are indeed changing, and we may be forced to change our ways as a result.

A large part of humanity’s carbon footprint is made up of emissions from our cars — carbon monoxide fumes that fill our skies with black clouds. One particularly innovative solution is the re-emergence of the electric car.

The initial expense of buying one may deter people, but perhaps the greatest allure of the electric car is the amount of money one will save through maintenance and cost of gasoline over the course of the car’s life.

Electric culture is a relatively new idea surrounding the rising number of electric vehicles appearing on the road. In 2008, hybrids like the Fisker Karma that ran on electricity for short intervals and then relied on gasoline for longer distances started to emerge, and in 2010 Nissan released the first fully electric car with zero carbon emission, the Leaf. As of December 2013 there were nearly 90,000 Leafs on the roads throughout Japan, Europe and North America, not accounting for all of the other brand name electric vehicles in circulation.

A NEW AGE

which can’t be any better than extracting oil out of the ground and pumping the refined version into the gas tank. However, most of the electric vehicles on the road are zero emission, meaning that there is no exhaust, so even if it is powered from a non-renewable source, no carbon dioxide is fed back in to the atmosphere.

Here in BC, the drivers of electric vehicles can claim to have more of a green thumb than others, seeing as 93 per cent of electricity in BC is produced from clean and naturally-occurring sources. Thirty hydroelectric dams in BC produce 86 per cent of the province’s total energy and a further seven per cent from other renewable sources such as solar cells and wind farms. The 2015 model of the Nissan Leaf also sports its own solar cell on the rear of the roof that powers most of the gadgets on the dashboard, allowing for a greater range on the battery.

ATTAINABILITY

9

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

For most students, the electric vehicle is but a distant dream. Right now, the cheapest option is the Mitsubishi i-MiEV with a MSRP of $27,998. The thought of owning a Tesla is often unfathomable in comparison, but that won’t always be true. Tesla CEO, Elon Musk, tweeted at the beginning of the year that the Tesla Model 3, slated for production in 2017, will be priced at just $35,000 in comparison to the current asking price of $100,000 for a Tesla Roadster.

Musk recently also broke ground for a Gigafactory in Reno, Nevada that will produce the high-power Tesla batteries at greatly reduced costs.

What separates the Tesla from other brands of electric vehicles isn’t only the cost, but the power behind the motor. For the gu-

THE CAPILANO COURIER

There was once a time in the 1970s and 80s when General Motors manufactured electric vehicles in small numbers before limited consumer demand forced them to reconsider. Most electric cars that existed in the previous century ended up in museums or being scrapped for parts. It wasn’t until 30 years later that they began to resurface.

From an environmentalist’s perspective, the rising number of electric vehicles is certainly a step in the right direction. “If you’re driving a short distance, like in the city, it makes perfect sense because you save quite a lot of gas,” said Nat Berhane, a sales consultant for Nissan.

It’s when you’re travelling much further that going electric becomes more difficult.

Unlike gas stations, charging points are harder to come by, making long-distance travel difficult on a depleting battery. But as more and more electric vehicles appear, more charging points appear in public.

One of the potential issues with going electric is the range. The average petroleum- or diesel-powered car can travel approximately 300 kilometres per tank, and

only takes a couple of minutes to refuel.

An electric vehicle, on the other hand, has a reduced range. The Leaf and BMW I3 can travel an average of 135 kilometres before having to recharge, not accounting for shifts in terrain, climate conditions and weight, which alter the range. Charging stations scattered around Metro Vancouver and the North Shore can take anywhere between half an hour to 10 hours to charge a battery from empty to full, depending on the number of volts being supplied — CapU has its own, which are located in parking lots 1 and 7 on either side of the Sportsplex.

At 22-24 kWh, electric vehicles such as the I3 and the Leaf can travel between 130-160 kilometres on one charge. The Tesla Model S can travel further, nearly 400 kilometres on a single 60 kWh battery.

However, the batteries needed to power these cars are incredibly expensive — generally over $10,000 apiece — and their lifespan is what concerns drivers. The price is dropping though. At its release in 2010, the Nissan Leaf’s battery cost $18,000 USD. The current price is $7,000 and is expected to decrease further in time, along with those of the Tesla and BMW batteries.

Most manufacturers have also been working to incorporate interchangeable parts for batteries. According to Berhane, “the battery before [2013] used to be one piece…They upgraded it so it’s actually partitioned, it’s got battery cells.” Those individual cells allow batteries to remain serviceable for longer, and if something fails, the dead cells can be replaced rather than the entire battery.

Not all critics have lauded the rebirth of the electric vehicle — many are skeptical about just how green it actually is. The argument goes that electricity is produced by burning coal, a non-renewable resource,

rus and connoisseurs out there, the electric vehicle packs a big punch with its regenerative braking and ability to accelerate. Not to mention it has an incredible range of close to 400 kilometres on a single battery charge.

As for whether electric vehicles will ever become affordable to the impoverished student, it’s hard to say. “Every time we launch a new model, the price goes up,” said Berhane, referring to the Nissan Leaf, “but that is because the effectiveness of the car is improving overall.” It’s also possible that one day the electric car might replace petroleumpowered engines altogether, but that day is still far off. “I would say that’s quite far into the future because we invest a lot of money in our oil, but would it be possible, yes,” said Berhane.

There are other ways for students to make a difference, even if they can’t afford the electric drive quite yet. A number of Capilano University’s students rely on Car2Go, one form of car sharing in Vancouver.

Evo is another local startup that supplies hybrid Toyota Prius C’s, another form of electric drive. “We’re a one-way car sharing service that’s designed for the BC lifestyle,” said Shawn Pettipas, manager of community impact Evo’s parent company, BCAA. “What that means is that we run 100 per cent hybrid weight. We believe that makes us one of the greenest car-sharing providers here in BC.” In biology, the term hybrid refers to crossspecies. In the automotive sense, it refers to vehicles that rely on a high-voltage electric motor to cover short distances, and as one travels further, the internal combustion engine kicks in to power the car. “We picked the hybrid vehicles because of their reduced emissions and the sustainability that they offered,” said Pettipas. Car2Go, for example, also relies on more environmentally friendly modes of transportation. The company unrolled several fleets of electric Smart Cars back in 2009.

Currently, electric cars make up a fraction of a per cent of the world’s total vehicles, but 2015 alone has seen a growth rate of 76 per cent in the electric industry.

The number of electric cars on the road has risen from a mere handful in 2009 to well over 800,000 according to the International Business Times. There may also be a link between the government and the expanding market, as unlikely as that sounds, but the introduction of carbon taxes and incentives has encouraged more people to go green and gasoline-free than ever before.

NEWS FEATURES

@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

INTO THE WILD

The people fighting BC’s forest fires Gabriel Scorgie FEATURES EDITOR This summer, it was impossible not to notice the wildfires that burned throughout British Columbia. For much of July, Vancouver was blanketed by smoke from fires burning in Pemberton, Sechelt and Washington State. The news was filled with stories of blazes growing rapidly, threatening to burn down campgrounds, cancel music festivals and force people out of their homes.

Everyone has seen pictures and videos of the fires and the damage they’ve caused, but few have seen the men and women fighting them. People might think they’re the same firefighters that work at the nearby fire hall. This is not true. In fact, it’s more likely that the firefighters that saved Pemberton Music Festival this year were Capilano University students.

A BURNING DESIRE Timothy Routtu has been a member of the BC Wildfire Management Branch (WMB) for the past nine years. During that time, he went to university for a Bachelor of Science degree and is now pursuing a degree in Pharmacy. “The average age of a forest firefighter is early to mid-20s, with 50 per cent of them being students and the other 50 per cent being seasonal workers and travelers,” he explained.

Nicklas Pankratz is a 21-year-old WMB member and was a student at the University of British Columbia before he decided to work towards becoming a structural fire-

10

fighter. Pankratz said that what attracted him to the WMB was the opportunity it presented to test himself. “I wanted a challenge,” he began, “This job is not easy. It’s extremely physically demanding — you can work 12-hour days for 14 days straight.

There aren't many work environments that will push you to your limits and then force you past them. I want to see what I am capable of and the WMB provides the perfect opportunity to do that.”

According to Routtu, around 1,500 people apply for roughly 150 available positions each year. Applicants submit a resume and a cover letter which must include two work references, as well as proof they’ve got their WorkSafe BC Occupational First Aid (OFA) Level I certification and a Transportation Endorsement ticket. The latter is a course that teaches people how to safely transport injured workers to first aid. Applicants with OFA Level III certification may submit that for consideration instead.

If applicants meet all the requirements then they may be invited to boot camp. “Everyone invited to boot camp receives weeklong training, but that does not mean they’re hired,” warned Routtu.

Boot camp is held in Merritt and it’s where prospective WMB members are tested on their fitness and are taught the basics of fighting forest fires.

“Boot camp was an amazing experience,” said Pankratz. "We learned how to operate and troubleshoot water pumps, how to safely be around chainsaw operations, fire behaviour, how fuel and terrain affect fire and we learned some basic meteorology.”

Every morning, crews would be tested on their fitness before spending the rest of the

day learning about fighting fires. “We were taught about fire line tactics, the aircrafts available and their restrictions and how to be a professional passenger in a helicopter,” said Pankratz.

Recruits were also educated on wilderness survival and how to stay both mentally and physically healthy while on the job. “They told us what options firefighters have available to deal with stress, gave us advice on how to stay healthy on the fire line and listed some common ailments to look out for on the fire line,” he explained.

For Pankratz, however, the people he was surrounded by were what made boot camp so special. “Everybody there is driven and positive, so the atmosphere was always upbeat,” he said. “By the end of the week you’ve made some great friendships.”

Once a recruit passes the boot camp stage, an invitation to join a crew will be sent within a couple of weeks. If that invitation is accepted, the new WMB member will be expected to work between three to five months, with extensions on their contracts if necessary. “Exceptions for university students are made to the start and end times of the contract so they can be in school,” explained Routtu.

“Once hired, the majority of the technical aspects of extinguishing flames are learned during a fire and a select number of people will do courses such as quick water rescue training and chainsaw training,” he continued. The training provided after hire will depend on the crew and what they need people for.

Scenarios are run to illustrate responsibilities and decision involved when responding to an incident from start to finish. Routtu said this may involve things such as practicing trouble shooting skills when things don’t go as planned or testing pumps. Crews normally have two days that are dedicated to training before they’ll be put on a fire.

The crew they join will become their family for the summer. Like any situation where a group of people is forced to overcome challenges, a bond forms between crew members.

It’s possible for a crew to spend weeks working

every day on a fire together.

“When you're a part of a crew you’re forced very quickly to like someone. Spending every minute of every day together for months, it's extremely beneficial to be easy to get along with,” said Pankratz, who spoke highly of his crew and all the others he worked with this summer. ”Everybody in the ministry is a phenomenal person so it's not difficult to be happy with whichever crew you're put on.”

The WMB takes care to make sure that their members are given adequate amount of time off between fires as well.

“The thing that governs how long we can work is the WorkSafe BC standard number two,” said Pankratz, “Basically, you can work 14 duty days in a row without rest. A duty day is any day you accumulate overtime. Usually they’re days you’re on a fire. If you don’t work 14 in a row then you can work 17 in a month before you're forced to reset. Or, if you have less than 17 duty days you can work 28 regular days in a row before you have to reset. You reset by taking three days off.”

Pankratz also explained that another way to reset was to take two days off, followed by two more light days working around base camp.

WMB members are given an hour a day, whenever possible, to dedicate to keeping their fitness levels high. “It's common for people to go on runs or lift weights. If there enough people at base that day someone will organize group fitness that closely resembles CrossFit,” said Pankratz. “The best training, however, is when you're on a fire and carrying a hundred pounds up steep hills for a few kilometres.”

Many employees also play sports when they’re not working. There is a soccer team and a hockey team that crew members can join.

Spending a summer fighting the massive fires the news reports on may sound like a dangerous job for a student. However, in their 102-year history, the WMB has never had a fatal incident. “The job will always be as safe as you make it, but people’s safety is the number one concern,” said Routtu, “There is always a pyramid for injuries, so cuts, bruises, blisters and burns are normal.”

Routtu said that an acronym, known as LACES (Lookout, Anchor Point, Communication, Escape Routes and Safety Zones), is used for every incident. This acronym, along with the 10 regular WorkSafe standards allows for every member to work in a safe environment.

LOOKING INTO THE FUTURE In July, BC premier, Christy Clark, stood in Kelowna and said that the trend of drier conditions and more fires would continue due to climate change. Though nobody doubts that climate change is playing a role in the weather conditions, Routtu is warning people not to think about fires as trends, but to see it as a cycle.

“Fire seasons are cyclic. There will be a few years of wet seasons and then hot seasons,” he said. “Think of it as a five to six year cycle where three to four years are cold, followed by two or three warm years.”

The last 10 years support Routtu’s statement. According to Bcwildfire.ca, in 2009 there were 3064 fires that burned 247,419 hectares and cost the government a staggering $382 million. The next year there were only 1672 fires but they burned 337,149 hectares. The year after that, 653 fires ravaged just 12,604 hectares.

This year, over 1,800 fires have been started as of September 5, with 83 of them still being active and larger than 10 hectares. The number of large fires this year can be credited to the unusually dry and warm winter BC had. The drier the conditions are, the easier it will be to start fires early in the season.

Routtu gave an example of how easy it is to accidentally start a fire when it’s dry, “Personally, I’ve done a match drop test in a controlled environment where you light a match and drop it to see if it starts a fire,” he said. “This was eye-opening as three matches were dropped and three fires resulted from the test.”

In an interview with the Globe and Mail, WMB Director, Brian Simpson, explained that the dry winters are causing wildfires to start earlier than they used to. “We’re finding now that there are periods during our fire seasons that are much higher-risk than we have historically experienced,” he said.

“We’re getting to these much higher-intensity fires much more quickly than in the past. We need to be prepared much earlier.

If you go back 10 years, our crew organiza-

tion, preseason preparation, never really got cranked up until the middle of April. We are doing that now at the beginning of March.

These early fires are making the BC government blow through their budget quicker each year.”

This year, the $63 million allocated to fight BC wildfires was gone by the first couple weeks of May, and UBC Forestry Expert, Lori Daniels, told CBC that the government has spent over $200 million so far this year.

This isn’t unusual. The government has overspent their budget nine times in the last 10 years. Scientists are predicting that this winter could be one of the driest and warmest ever recorded due to a super El Niño formation. This means that next fire season could be one of the driest on record, so preparation will be crucial.

It’s difficult for one agency to be prepared enough to handle an entire season though, so the WMB relies on mutual-aid agreements with other provinces and countries.

They’ll send people and supplies to other places in need of help, and in return they will receive the same aid.

Routtu said that some of the best ways to be better prepared for next year is for the government to plan for more fires in the budget and to expand people’s knowledge on how to report fires. “Educate people about how to prevent wildfires, but also how to report wildfires for a quicker response,” he said. “Expand the cellular network for efficient reporting times of wildfires as well. Understand that reporting something that might be a fire is better than not reporting one at all.”

A lot of the fires are spotted by the public and called in. “We rely on people being aware of their surroundings, to call in fires while they're small, giving us a high chance of success,” said Pankratz. “You can call in a fire by dialing *5555, or if you forget that you can always call 911.”

The other way crews can detect fires is

by using spotter planes. “WMB also puts up spotter planes,” he said. “Generally, once a day a plane will go up and fly a course determined by the areas of high risk or where there's been recent lightning.”

Roughly 50 per cent of the fires each year are caused by people, with the other 50 per cent being lightning. It’s easy to say that people should be more educated about fire prevention, but convincing someone to not flick their cigarette butt out their car window is no easy feat.

Daniels said that removing fuel hazards such as leaves and branches, and setting up a plan to fireproof communities is a good and practical start, even though it’s hard to predict what each fire season will be like.

Simpson admitted to the Globe and Mail that weather patterns are getting more unpredictable. The highs are higher and the lows lower, but what is certain is that there will be fires next year, and that the WBM is doing its best to make sure their employees get the training and resources they need, while still protecting the people they serve.

“Every day this job has a new incredible experience.” said Pankratz, “Whether you're getting rushed out the door at 1 am to stop someone's house from getting burned down, or watching two wolverines run right at you, or the mind-blowing views we get to see from helicopters and the top of mountains that you won't find anywhere else. It's impossible to pick one moment that stands ahead of the others. This job puts you in places very few people will ever be lucky enough to experience, but all that is overshadowed by the people you get to work with. The recruiting process allows for only the highest caliber people and I count myself truly lucky to be a part of them.”

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NEWS& CULTURE ARTS

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FRINGE BINGE

Executive director offers must-see picks for 31st annual festival Andy Rice EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Vancouver Fringe Festival is back for another 11-day celebration of uncensored, unjuried and unorthodox theatrics.

The 31st instalment kicked off last Tuesday and will feature 108 artists at 22 venues across Vancouver before the final curtain call on Sept 20.

“We pick the festival shows out of a hat and that’s what really keeps it fresh,” said David Jordan, executive director. “In one way it’s the same old Fringe but in another way it’s always a brand new Fringe.”

Two additions in particular have Jordan and his fellow organizers excited this year.

“One is an evolution of our site-specific [theatre] program and it’s called DareU,” he explained. “It’s augmented reality, so you walk thorough this parking garage with a tablet and a view-finder and when you find certain landmarks it triggers a video that’s been created for that site.” Eight emerging artists from The Only Animal theatre company

partnered with the Fringe for the project.

The second is an initiative called Advance Theatre: New Works by Women, designed to celebrate and encourage female playwrights. “Fringe is a place where… a lot of impressive [female] theatre actors and directors have made their start and we want to make sure that we can build in a place for those writers as well,” said Jordan. “That’s a collaboration with Ruby Slippers Theatre.”

Aside from the eclectic mix of performers each year, volunteers are the lifeblood of Vancouver Fringe. “We have 500 volunteers or more and the operations of the festival are all volunteer-run,” he said. “The box office at the door and that kind of stuff we really couldn’t do without them.”

Jordan said that he and his team are always looking for more help, especially from people with a theatre background. And in

THIS YEAR'S FRINGE FEST PICKS CapU Grad

SPOOKEASY SEPT. 14 @ 5PM • SEPT. 16 @ 7:45PM • SEPT. 19 @ 9:10PM SEPT. 20 @ 1:15PM

SEPT. 15 @ 6:30PM • SEPT. 17 @ 10:00PM • SEPT. 18 @ 5PM • SEPT 19 @ 7:45PM • SEPT 20 @ 2:45PM

WATERFRONT THEATRE

FIREHALL ARTS CENTRE

“A wild mix of vaudeville performances, including an epic cowboys at high noon shootout – with puppetry! Pure fun.”

“This one’s a really edgy and funny musical version of Shakespeare’s bloodiest play. So much talent on the stage!”

CapU Grad

CapU Grad

INSTANT LIFE

DUDES OF MY LIFE

SEPT. 14 @ 8:30PM • SEPT. 15 @ 7:30PM • SEPT. 17 @ 5:10PM • SEPT. 19 @ 1:15PM • SEPT. 20 @ 8:10PM

SEPT. 14 @ 8:20PM • SEPT. 15 @ 9PM •SEPT. 18 @ 11PM SEPT. 20 @ 7:10PM

STUDIO 1398

STUDIO 16

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

“Sea Monkeys in outer space. I think the people that this will appeal to need no further convincing: Sea Monkeys in outer space.”

CapU Grad

“Dating, the other source of comedy in the universe.

In this piece, the artist’s parents use Tinder on her behalf…”

Touring Artist

LEFTOVERS

THE EXCLUSION ZONE

SEPT. 15 @ 5 PM • SEPT. 18 @ 10:25 PM •SEPT. 20 @ 6:45 PM

SEPT. 17 @ 6:45PM • SEPT. 19 @ 5:40PM • SEPT. 20 @ 3:15PM

WATERFRONT THEATRE

“Family, the source of all comedy in the universe…”

THE CAPILANO COURIER

FROM EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR DAVID JORDAN.

Touring Artist

THE LIGHT AND DELIGHTFUL COMEDY OF TITUS ANDRONICUS

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that case, many students at Capilano University may want to take note.

“Skip your classes! Just come on down,” he said. “The festival is really a community experience, you know. It’s a great way to meet people, even if you’re not a volunteer, but to volunteer is a great way to meet people, meet the artists and I really recommend it.”

There are perks to helping out as well, in the form of Rush Passes for anyone who clocks in more than 16 hours of service. “You can go see any show that’s not sold out,” he explained. “At five minutes before the show we open up our doors to the Rush line. We have volunteers who see like 50 shows.”

Some of those shows even feature CapU alumni.

Tickets for most performances are $14, of which $11 goes directly to the artists.

Venues vary in size and are often packed throughout most of the festival. For a full list of performers and show times, visit VancouverFringe.com.

WATERFRONT THEATRE

“Brooklyn’s Martin Dockery is a masterful storyteller (he’s been called the best in the US!) This one will be a surreal story sandwich with many layers, all leading to a legendary room in Chernobyl.”

NEWS ARTS & CULTURE

MARK CRICKMAY

ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR ARTS.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

CHAIRMAN OF THE BARD

The validity of Shakespeare in a modern age Mark Crickmay ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR Do people other than art students, theatre professionals and parents care for the lengthly droll that is Shakespeare? Is this a dying art form? Will newer generations comprehend its meaning?

Gaining traction with new audiences through modern renditions, and doing them well, is a clear cut way to make Shakespeare relevant and exciting. Vancouver’s annual Bard on the Beach festival is helping to keep the spirit of Shakespeare alive, and ensuring it grows by doing exactly that.

In its 26-year history, the festival has consistently given way to modern takes on traditional classics. With a steampunked rendition of A Comedy of Errors on the program this year, director Scott Bellis is capturing a new angle that hopes to captivate multiple generations. In a digital age where attention spans are that of the memory of a goldfish (approximately three seconds), Bard aims to help maintain and elevate the classics.

“This idea has attracted young and old.

It’s a light piece, it’s a farce, which doesn’t mean that everybody has to be stupid to get it, but it has to be funny,” said Christopher Gaze, the festival’s artistic director. “I have a hard time with productions of Shakespeare that are arbitrary in their context.”

People in this day and age are not likely to see a Shakespeare play done in the same way as it was originally performed. With an ear for modern influences, more updated

versions of Shakespeare classics have proven better able to reach a wider range of audiences.

But even still, the genre can be cumbersome to many.

“I feel I understand Shakespeare performances if I have studied the play previously,” said Robin Christopher, a Bard audience member and Psychology major at Simon Fraser University. “The Old English in real-time makes it hard to understand.

For example, two hours with A Midsummer Night’s Dream has nothing on a threemonth course studying it.”

For that reason, Christopher has doubts about Shakespeare’s longevity among the regular population. “I can see poetry and playwriting as a lasting art form, because of how much they pack into the writing style, but not necessarily the Shakespearian style itself,” he said.

Within theatre circles, however, Shakespeare has a seemingly immortal place, although Gaze agrees that the craft behind it isn’t always understood by audiences.

“People feel that maybe they’re stupid, maybe it’s their fault and not ours,” he said.

“You don’t want to intimidate people. You want them to feel that when they see our productions that they get a certain delight when they disappear inside the text. They feel smarter than when it all began, more connected to Shakespeare than ever… Done

— MEGAN COLLINSON well, it is relevant to everybody — you have have to be able to do it well.”

With the contribution of lifelong fans, support from the Bank of Montreal (BMO) and Goldcorp, Bard should able to keep Shakespeare and other classics alive for as long as the public is interested.

The recent opening of the BMO Theatre Centre is a huge evolution for theatre in Vancouver, Shakespeare and Bard on the Beach.

“From a production point of view we’ve got all sorts of dreams and aspirations,” said Gaze, whose offices are now based at the facility.

The BMO Theatre Centre will elevate those aspirations by providing the space for professionals to create and recreate, be it a modern

work, old classic or a mixture of both.

“If [someone] can see something that is done well and [they] have an eye for culture, words and themes, and the great stories, they’ll be transformed,” said Gaze.

So long as people use stories as a means of communication, then they will likely be interested in where those stories came from as well. After all, underneath the elaborate costumes, Old English text and 1,700 madeup words, Shakespeare’s plays are just stories.

GETTING THE LAUGHS

How amateur comedians may create a more relaxed environment Leah Scheitel CONTRIBUTOR

other people notice and think about the same things they do,” she said. “Shedding comical light on the darker subjects of life helps everyone accept the world as it is. I don’t think that it matters whether someone is an amateur or a professional as long as they have viable and hilarious things to say.”

“People need a place to laugh,” said Fournier. “Not everyone has a person or thing in their life that can give them the satisfaction that a genuine laugh can. I personally love the feeling of being a random stranger’s story for the day when they tell a friend or family member about ‘this funny guy who bitches about Tinder’.”

At some point all professional comedians were amateurs. It takes hard work, unique perspective and a loyal fan base in order to gain popularity. Amateur comedians provide a sense of relaxation for their audience in the sense that the audience gets to choose whether or not they like the comic.

They may not always fill a room, but they are essential to keeping the scene alive and challenging.

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

been given one. You don’t have to be wellknown to be funny, however, if you already have a good reputation it is easier to entice people to see your performance.”

Before his foray into comedy, Fournier was a touring musician. “I remember the struggle very much, showing up to gigs to have a five-member audience. I remember how degrading it was and how it made you feel like you weren't even worth seeing, but doing comedy it is crazy that I can do a set in front of a full audience on amateur night…

With music, you have different genres or taste but with comedy you find that most if not all people like to laugh and finding an audience is much easier.”

He recalls watching shows like Just for Laughs in his younger years, seeing what worked for the pros and how they chose to present a joke. “Just like anything you need a good mix of people who are new to the craft and also have been doing it a while,” he said.

“We all learn from each other in some way.”

Whether it’s of an amateur or professional pedigree, Doxford believes that there is a fundamental place in the entertainment industry for comedy. “People need comedy and they need the comfort of knowing that

THE CAPILANO COURIER

A good comedian can fill a stadium. From George Carlin in the 70s, to Eddie Murphy and his butt-hugging pants in the 80s, to the likes of Amy Schumer today, a good comedian is worth a pretty penny, as they deserve to be. They have mastered the art of joke telling, hitting the timing of jokes perfectly like they were a drum cue.

The only fallback might be having a line too rehearsed that can make the comedian complacent, compared to an amateur comedian who has to work harder to make the audience feel comfortable.

Amateurs don’t always know when the audience is going to laugh, but the comic might have the upper hand in creating funnier shows because of this. They are more open to off-the-cuff humour and literally closer to the audience, feeding off of the audience’s energy, providing more opportunities to create a better, more original show.

“What I like about amateur comedians is that they are usually genuinely funny and have to be quick on the spot and a lot of times have to improvise their set,” said James

Fournier, an aspiring comic who recently took the stage at a YukYuks amateur comedy event. “When you see a pro comic their set is just super dialled in and you can feel the cues and it's just very structured, which is sometimes really good but sometimes you can tell they have done that joke or bit a million times.”

“I think the exciting thing about amateur comedians is not knowing whether they will be funny, awkward or failures,” said Catherine Doxford, a local arts enthusiast who attended Fournier's performance as an audience member. “You don’t know if their comedy will be dark or light, or even what their style and subject matter will be. Often, with professionals, you have heard opinions on their material, but seeing an amateur for the first time can only provide you with surprises.”

Seeing an unknown comic is a gamble – the material is unknown and might not mix well with everybody. “If I know of the professional and I like their work I would definitely be more inclined to see them, simply because I know that I would enjoy it,” she continued.

“If I was unsure of who the comedian was, I think I would be more inclined to see the amateurs because I would like to take the chance on people who may not have already

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NEWS ART SHORTS

Carlo Javier

THE CAPILANO COURIER

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE EDITOR In his debut album Coming Home, Texasborn crooner Leon Bridges reimagined the spirit and vibe of classic soul pioneers like Otis Redding and Sam Cooke. Though wellreceived for its nostalgic sound, critics saw Bridges’ throwback music as a potential obstacle for further projects – where would he go from there?

In one fell swoop, Bridges, with the aid of MICK and a variety of Texas-based producers, knocked the doubt out of the way with a mixtape, Coming Home to Texas. By synthesizing Coming Home’s classic southern sound with some of Houston’s most acclaimed hiphop tracks, MICK and Bridges were able to find a new dimension for his style. The surprise mixtape opens with a chopped and screwed version of “Coming Home,” setting the tone and atmosphere for the imaginative fusion of southern rap and soul.

Remixed tracks of “Better Man” and “Brown Skin Girl” not only feature notable guest verses from southern rap legends like Bun B and Slim Thug, but also innovative distortions and modifications of Bridges’ singing — to the point that he sounds as if he recorded an entirely new track. But it was the final track, “River”, that truly displayed the mastery of the mixtape. Already considered by many as Bridges’ crowning achievement on his debut album, the remix of “River”, laced with UGK’s beloved “International Players Anthem”, further pushed the boundaries and possibilities of Bridges’ sound. The once solemn and chilling track seemingly fit perfectly with the song that

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SNAKE RIVER

Songs from the Adjacent Room

Leah Scheitel CONTRIBUTOR It’s not a good sign when you put on an album to review it and then completely forget that it’s playing. It’s an even worse sign is when the album is noticed and the first thought is “Who put this screeching sound on?” But unfortunately that’s what happened when listening to Snake River’s Songs from the Adjacent Room.

The band’s fifth studio release features seven songs, each one a little more undistinguishable from the next. To be fair, the first track “Hours III: Jeanie Says” starts the album off on a promising note, but the other six songs are basically dead weight on that.

One discernible quality of the band is that they sound like a modern day garage band, and it’s certain that they have a strong following of hipster supporters that go to all of their shows even though they don’t know the words or even really enjoy the music.

Snake River are reminiscent of the Fleet Foxes, and who knows how the hell those guys got to be popular. But really, only play this album if you want to seem like a music snob and you’re up to date on all the hipster music that nobody else cares about. For the other 98 per cent of you, just skip this one.

Mark Crickmay ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR Drawing from more acoustic natures than Gang Signs’ freshman release, Geist reveals a more mature side of the group.

Evolving and sounding a little more like the XX met 50-year-old Trent Reznor and hired Interpol’s Paul Banks to play guitar and made an album together, Gang Signs steps up the indie electronic game several feet. With more prominent vocals from both singers, Peter Ricq and Matea Sarenac, Gang Signs feels like they’re shaping up to be more than just a softly-spoken indie electronic band.

From the opening track, “Mate”, to the closing track, “Stay Awake”, Geist beckons listeners to feed off of dreamy soundscapes, heavy-hitting but soft bass lines and melancholy vocal melodies. The adolescence of Gang Signs’ self-titled freshman release is long gone, and replaced with confident, wellcrafted beats, melodies and production.

A video was released on Sept. 9 for the spacious track, “Tonight”, where Sarenac lends some 90s R&B-inspired vocals overtop of looming baselines. Some of the group can be seen dancing with a funky older lady enjoying her night in “Tonight”. This is the only track that may be too reminiscent of Gang Signs’ freshman release — not a full step forward with this one, but still great.

It’s refreshing to see promise like Gang Signs in Vancouver and hopefully they can maintain their well-produced yet moody sound for future releases. The last time Vancouver may have seen promise like this was in producer Julian Fane. Geist avoids the blending effect of Gang Signs’ freshman release. Individual songs really stand out this time, providing a sense of maturity and fruition.

Set to release Oct. 2 under File Under Music, Geist is sure to surprise and delight both new and old listeners. If you’re in Vancouver on the same day, Gang Signs will be having a release party in which they will also display new logo designs from fans.

04 SEOUL

I Become a Shade Faye Alexander CONTRIBUTOR There is nothing quite like moody dream pop to call your new companion as you’re lying in bed and awaiting the eternal darkness that is winter in Vancouver.

CapCourierLive

Coming Home to Texas

epitomized southern crunk music, to the point that the only thing that would’ve made it better was a new verse from UGK or OutKast.

With Coming Home to Texas, not only did MICK and Bridges shatter doubts about the future direction of their music, but they also reenergized rap’s most diverse region – the south.

Geist

CapCourierLive

MICK & LEON BRIDGES

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GANG SIGNS

The editors of the Capilano Courier take to the streets for Vancouver’s most buzz-worthy concerts, events and social gatherings.

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Montreal trio Seoul created I Become Shade with 12 tracks that weightlessly transport you into a fool’s paradise. Albeit, it’s hard to listen to without wondering if you accidentally pressed play on an old Pheonix album, music nowadays is all just post modernism anyway, right?

With electronic dance music (EDM) becoming pop music’s new norm, evoking wild, shameless dance nights, Seoul’s latest is the not for your big night out, but rather your comedown the morning after. Ambient and listless, I Become a Shade perfectly embodies ‘chillwave’, if that is, in fact, a word.

‘White Morning’, the albums stand out number, picks up the tempo (barely) and the lyrics spill over the joyful little guitar riff sashaying throughout the song.

Vocalist Nigel Ward offers perfect unmoved monotone vocals over the entire record, which sound like a throwback to the dawn of the early 2000s indie-hipster takeover. Ward’s voice sweeps over every track and it blends into the synthesized sounds that make up every piece of the album.

When you listen closely enough, it is fun to dissect the hidden sounds just below the surface. “Thought You Were” has a hint of a bubbling bong as the song fades out, while title track “I Become a Shade” boasts subtle distortion and ambivalent snares.

It’s a veritable tranquilizer of an album, like the musical equivalent of oxycontin, and if you’re accustomed to heinous hangovers this might just be the comedown album for you.

Capilano courier live

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@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

OPINIONS

KEVIN KAPENDA

OPINIONS EDITOR OPINIONS.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT!

Newfoundland replaces student loans with grants Kevin Kapenda OPINIONS EDITOR Newfoundland and Labrador has made history this summer after deciding to abolish its student loan program and replace it with nonrepayable grants. In a move that has been hailed by student groups like the Canadian Federation of Students (CFS), Newfoundland has taken a large step towards what some would describe as a pathway to free post-secondary education for its residents.

The move comes at a time in which the CFS and similar organizations are advocating for more government action on what they believe is a growing student debt crisis across Canada. The eradication of student loans in the province will surely help Newfoundland solve some long-term issues they are facing, such as an aging population. But the timing of the announcement couldn’t be more questionable, and risky, as the incumbent Conservative government prepares to stand for re-election this November amid falling revenues from oil production. Gambles like the introduction of non-repayable grants are often necessary when a government is campaigning for support in a tight race, but can turn good policies into bad ones when the money isn’t there to send students to class on the taxpayers’ dime.

When Newfoundland and Labrador students were officially freed from the walls of provincial student loans in early August,

coverage of the precedent was muted at best. This was probably because those nonrepayable grants would only be available to individuals who met the exceptional criteria of being a Newfoundland and Labrador resident, studying in province.

This is just drop in the bucket among students across the country, as Newfoundland is Canada’s second least-populated province behind Prince Edward Island.

While the immediate effect of the law might be small, the example that has been set by Newfoundland’s government is anything but. Programs that are introduced in other provinces are usually used as leverage by national organizations, like the CFS, to push for those same initiatives elsewhere.

What was once a dinner table concept has now become a reality in Canada, undoubtedly increasing pressure on other premiers to follow suit or face an even larger backlash from students.

While the introduction of non-repayable grants is nothing short of a big win for students and an empathy touchdown for a Conservative government, both of those groups are not in the clear yet in terms of public support for the move. This measure comes at a time in which Newfoundland, Canada’s resident offshore drilling province, is battling with falling oil prices and plummeting government revenues. Good policies, instituted during poor economic times, can

become bad when the public is not willing to dig deeper into their wallets to pay for them.

Tax and fee increases have already been announced alongside the budget to pay for this program that will cost roughly $50 million between now and 2020. The government will be running a deficit for at least one more fiscal year, which would make it four in a row.

The Liberal opposition in Newfoundland has accused the PCs of trying to buy votes ahead of the November provincial election with borrowed money from the youth or future taxpayers. “Really, what this government has done is taken out the kids’ credit card in preparation for, I believe, an election,” said party leader Dwight Ball in the Globe and Mail last year. This policy is a good one, but one wonders if it could wait until oil prices have rebounded enough to warrant groundbreaking increases in spending.

According to a 2011 Government of Canada study, Newfoundland and Labrador is set to have the oldest population in the country by 2036. This was measured by forecasting how many of residents of each province will be over the age of 65 by that year. Newfoundland was first by quite some distance, followed by its three other Maritime companions. If Newfoundland is to secure a strong economic future, it will not only need to educate skilled workers in universities and trade schools, but keep them in province after graduation, to build their

lives there. Bribing them with free education to stay in province and study at home is definitely a great start.

As provincial CFS chairperson Travis Perry said in a post-announcement interview with CBC News back in August, it is all the things that student debt often prevents young people from doing, which will possibly benefit Newfoundland for decades to come, regardless of whether or not these students can pay their bills now. “When students graduate with large amounts of student debt, they're less likely to start a family, buy a home, buy a car, start a small business," he said.

If dumping loans for grants will keep more young people studying and working Newfoundland and Labrador, then it’s on baby boomers to foot the bill now in regards to health care funding, so students can one day return the favour as they age.

Just don’t tell Canada’s other premiers to do so, as replacing loans with grants in BC and Ontario could cost upwards of $1 billion and $3 billion respectively.

KEEPING UP WITH THE CODASHIANS

Why coding needs to be in the Canadian educational system Leah Scheitel CONTRIBUTOR

erations do for younger ones — impose the knowledge that we wanted upon them.

Of course, there would be difficulties adding coding into the school system. Canadian schools have to teach either French of English to graduating levels. Adding to that is that education is a provincial mandate, meaning that one province might enthusiastically introduce coding while the neighbouring provinces completely neglect it, giving Canadian children an uneven playing field — and let’s admit it, there is nothing that Canadians hate more than an uneven playing field. The American term for it is the ‘tall daisy syndrome’, meaning all the tall daisies get snipped down until they are on par with the average ones. But that doesn’t make this issue go away. As a society, we have an obligation to teach kids what they are going to need when they get into the ‘real world’. If someone has a good argument as to why anyone wouldn’t need coding in today’s world, I would welcome it, because I don’t see a valid one, and I would shoot holes in that argument like it was a bullseye.

Bring on the coding. Let’s teach it to everyone we can. And let’s applaud Google for its initiative. The government is saying they are always looking for skills to help minorities garner skills with. This one couldn’t be more attractive.

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

brilliant that Google has taken upon themselves to groom future employees, especially within minority groups, and it’s sad because it took a multi-billion dollar corporation to step up before it happened, rather than the Canadian education system.

Whether we would like to admit it or not, coding is a different pedigree of valuable. As a journalist embarking on a new career, I don’t like to admit how many jobs I have lost out on because I don’t know how to code (it’s been more than three). Coding is going to penetrate its way into our everyday life, and soon we will be more dependent on computer language than we already are now. Therefore, it makes total sense to introduce kids, as young as possible, to the language. Not only will the kids benefit from having a skill that the majority of adults will know less than Pig Latin, but also society will benefit. We will have a crop of kids with the skills that we wished we had. That’s what older gen-

THE CAPILANO COURIER

Have you ever wished that your parents were bilingual and you grew up with the ability to switch between languages with ease? If not, you should. Speaking different languages is a huge benefit to anyone — it opens opportunities, adds intellect and culture, and is impressive to anyone you are trying to attract. There is no detriment to knowing other languages.

Coding is a language onto itself. It might be different and it might only work when talking to computers and not to a grandmother in her native tongue, but it’s still a skill that provides the same benefits of knowing any other language. Okay, it might not be as impressive in attracting people, but it’s still worthy of our time. And it’s worthy to put into school systems and start teaching every kid in Canada proper coding and computer science techniques.

Canada is behind when it comes to keeping up with code. Last year, the United Kingdom became the first European Union nation to make coding apart of the curriculum for kids as young as six. Estonia (yes, you read that right) was the next to follow, with Italy, Finland and Switzerland slated to make it apart of their curriculums in 2016.

The countries where Latin originated

have even accepted the fact that it’s a dead language and are teaching newer and more valuable ones to their schools’ kids. This begs the question: what’s holding Canada back? We pride ourselves on being a progressive and welcoming country, but I guess computers and refugees don’t inspire us like they do other countries.

Last October, Google announced a $1.5 million initiative to introduce coding to kids in Canada. Codemakers received the grant money on the pretence that they would teach coding to kids, and particularly to kids in minorities. Girls, aboriginal youth, children of immigrants and kids facing socio-economic challenges were the main focus and benefactors of the initiative.

Acuta, as the project is dubbed, is a threeyear plan to introduce kids to coding in a summer camp and workshop environment.

It’s brilliant and sad at the same time — it’s

OPINIONS

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TUNING UP THE BAND Jays success brings in new fans Carlo Javier BANDWAGON FAN At 80 wins and 60 losses, the Toronto Blue Jays stand atop the Eastern Division of the American League (AL). They have the fourth best record in Major League Baseball (MLB), a leading AL MVP candidate in Josh Donaldson, and a record setting slugger in Edwin Encarnacion.

The team has also seen a spike in fan support, or, in the seething words of the diehards, bandwagon fans.

Bandwagoners are criticized for being fairweather people who only stand in support when their home team is winning and vanish when the team is irrelevant. But to the business side of sports, bandwagon fans are imperative to increasing revenue. As demonstrated by the Jays, the team’s recent rise in support has seen select home game ticket prices skyrocket up to $11,000 in some online markets.

In sports, with great and immediate success comes increased fan support, which can at times become polarizing. What is certain, though, is that even the most successful sports clubs in the world cannot outperform their competitors financially without casual fans who are only present when times are great.

The Jays’ scorching month of August saw the team win 78 per cent of their games, a feat matched only by the 1938 New York Yankees. The Jays also saw a sea of blue and white jerseys flock to the Rogers Centre game in and game out, a sign that’s been missing from Canada’s lone MLB squad

since the team’s glorious run during the early 1990s. Though this electric fan support that the Jays are experiencing now is a welcome addition to the country’s oftenlacklustre love for sports other than hockey, it’s still not something that promises to stay.

According to Charles Pascal of the Toronto Star, although the Jays’ relentless scoring may provide them with wins on the field, the team’s off-field moves are what could be an obstacle to long-term success.

Yes, the Jays are absolutely assaulting other teams on offence. Their 720 runs scored up to August separate them from the next best team by 90 runs, and their 49 homers in August were another MLB best. While Pascal believes that club General Manager Alex Anthopoulos deserves praise for “seizing the moment” during the trade deadline, he also gambled heavily by “implementing a risky balance between short-term acquisitions while giving up potential assets in return.”

Furthermore, Pascal finds himself doubtful of what moves Rogers will do to further the Jays’ success, particularly through team president, Paul Beeston, and GM, Anthopoulos. The lack of publicized contract talks between the team and the two main architects of their roster have been a source of skepticism for many wanting to know next season will be just as exciting as this one, particularly considering that the Jays can easily replicate their league-shifting trade deadline moves, acquiring short-term talent and giving away long-term prospects and potential with

their front office masterminds.

Regardless of the business side of the game, the sustainability of the Jays bandwagon still ultimately stands on the current success of the team. Suppose this team, led

by AL MVP candidate Josh Donaldson, does achieve baseball’s ultimate prize. Fans will be euphoric, sales of jerseys and other merchandise will rise and ticket prices will continue to skyrocket. Affan Chowdhry of the Globe and Mail stated that ticket prices for Jays’ games have already quadrupled since the team’s blockbuster trades during the MLB trade deadline, which saw the acquisition of shortstop Troy Tulowitzki and ace pitcher David Price. The trades not only brought over a rejuvenated interest in the Jays, they also wound up becoming the genesis of the team’s historic run. Chowdhry further added that the team sold 1,400 Tulowitzki and Price jerseys and shirts in a four-day period immediately following the trade.

Any and every club bandwagon is bound to create tension among real and overnight supporters. Fans of chronically-weak teams love to complain about lackadaisical support from locals, but when the victories begin pile on, and crowds comes roaring back to the stadium, diehard fans find themselves whining about the bandwagon.

After the season, the Jays management will be forced to find a way to either synthesize the team’s currently-talented roster with secure, long-term contracts to build a new MLB powerhouse, or leverage this period of almost unprecedented suc-

cess to offload key players and rebuild with prospects for future runs. What is certain though is that as long as players are playing, fans will be reacting to the outcome of their effort.

With the playoffs yet to start, this newfound Jays-mania hasn’t even reached its peak yet. Prime Minister Stephen Harper, Liberal leader Justin Trudeau and NDP boss Tom Mulcair have all been spotted in attendance, but the fans have yet to spot both of Canada’s actual princes of bandwagon, Justin Bieber and Drake. This is probably because they are waiting to see if the Jays are still playing in October, when the World Series of baseball will begin.

AM —J

ILL S AV ES

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SCHRÖDINGER’S RECESSION

Experts and party leaders disagree on state of economy James Martin

THE CAPILANO COURIER

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

CONTRIBUTOR The economy will always be a topic of discussion in any federal election, but it takes a front seat when fresh news of a recession breaks only a few weeks before polling day.

The timing of the announcement has naturally made it a hot topic, but the unusual details of this particular recession have made it even more debate-worthy. With Canada’s next government on the line, all the party leaders are trying to find a way to make the recession issue work in their favour.

The odd thing about this recession is that many economists disagree that it’s a recession at all. A recession is typically considered to be two or more quarters of falling GDP, characterized by increasing unemployment, decreasing manufacturing and declines in major markets such as the automotive and housing sectors.

For the time period in question, the job market was improving and the home and auto sectors were also mostly doing pretty well. Only the GDP contracted a bit, and most economists agree that alone doesn’t really spell a recession in anything more than the most technical and pedantic sense.

However, the Federal Balanced Budget

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Act the Conservative government recently enacted happens to carry the definition of what constitutes a recession as “a period of at least two consecutive quarters of negative growth”, so the politicians have their recession whether or not the economists agree.

A recession is a difficult black eye for any sitting government to defend, but especially so when that government has always made strong economic management a central pillar of their platform and identity as the Conservatives have. Stephen Harper can sort of try to get out of it by quoting the economists who say it isn’t a really recession, but it’s a tough sell for two reasons.

Firstly, it was his government that just created the act that happens to legally define a recession in Canada, but perhaps more importantly the “two quarters of declining GDP” definition has always been a pretty standard yardstick for a recession anyway, and that’s more than enough for any opposition politician to sink their teeth into.

So instead of denying it, one of Harper’s responses to the current recession news is that now would be the worst time to change government direction, just when we most need wise economic stewardship. “Stay the course when things aren’t going well” may sound like the definition of idiocy to some,

but there is theoretically some sound logic to the argument in this context. Recessions can be triggered by uncontrollable outside forces on the global market, just as Canada experienced in the 2008 and 2009 recession, and although they may be impossible to prevent their effects can be mitigated just as they were here at the time under the Harper government relative to how the United States fared. At the same time, however, Harper has also suggested that a small point of upswing at the end of the current batch of GDP data shows that things are on their way up again anyway and that his economic plan is working. Mixed messages might be dangerous territory for someone whose record is on the line.

On the other side of the spectrum, Tom Mulcair’s NDP has quite the opposite problem with the blessing/curse of no federal economic record to be judged on. Without past success to point to, Tom Mulcair’s NDP party is heavily leaning on a promise to deliver balanced budgets just as the Conservatives have. It’s a prudent decision if they can provide enough details to sway the doubters. A common fear among many voters is that an NDP government would mean running defects in order to prop up increased social programs such as Mulcair’s proposed national childcare plan. The Conservatives and

Liberals claim that there is still a disconnect between the NDP’s competing spending and budget-balancing promises and that any resulting tax hikes could trigger an even bigger drop in the fragile economy.

The Liberals are taking a different approach altogether. Justin Trudeau has promised to repeal Harper’s Federal Balanced Budget Act if elected and run three consecutive deficit budgets in order to jump-start the economy with infrastructure investments that will help create jobs and economic growth. Balancing the budget at all costs when times are tough can cause more harm than good, so running a deficit in order to keep things moving and encourage improvement can be a wise play if done right. However, Harper has ridiculed Trudeau’s plan, claiming that the economy is not so bad now, and running a deficit at this point would be unhelpful.

It seems that until the next economic report card, we will be both in and out of a recession at the same time as the various politicians see fit. Before we find out, however, we need to vote.

COLUMNS

CARLO JAVIER

COLUMNS EDITOR CARLO.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

WHY YOUR FAVOURITE THINGS SUCK Squamish Valley Music Festival Fred Ulrich Jr. COLUMNIST I had never been to a major music festival before this summer, and I will never go again if they are anything like this year’s Squamish Valley Music Festival. Despite great artists, an awe-inspiring setting and well-managed logistics given the event’s magnitude, the overall experience ranks no better than a participation ribbon in my mental trophy case of notable concerts. For the amount of money it cost, “been there, done that” is not what I would call worthwhile.

First of all, the scheduling could not have been more asinine. There were three stages that hosted the festival’s pop/rock/indie/rap artists, which sounds cool until you realize that this means every show will always overlap with at least one other show. This may be commonplace at many large festivals, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t bullshit.

Ever heard of “overchoice”? It’s the concept that having too many options is actually less enjoyable than only a limited selection, because it creates increasing stress to choose the best choice out of many good ones.

Further complicating matters was the fact that the second-biggest stage was a solid 15-minute walk away from the primary and tertiary stages, which is a significant chunk of time when most of the sets are only 45 minutes long. Trying to factor this all in, planning the optimal schedule as a non-time-traveller required spreadsheets weighing unending lose-lose scenarios such as: missing the second half of Bahamas’ set in order to catch the start of Elle King so you can leave her show early enough to see

Royal Blood start, catching all of Bahamas’ set and only the ends of Elle King’s and Royal Blood’s shows, or skipping Elle King altogether in order to enjoy the entirety of Bahamas’ and Royal Blood’s sets without interruption plus an extra 25 minutes in between to contemplate how you could be enjoying more world-class music right now only fifteen minutes awaythat you’ve already paid for, but have chosen not to.

Calculus should not be a prerequisite for figuring out how to have fun at a music festival. However, skipping the agonizing frustration of planning exactly which exciting moments you intend to miss means you could easily find yourself in an endless back-and-forth between some band you don’t like and arriving elsewhere just in time to miss the end of some really cool band and now having half an hour to think about how much that sucks instead. It’s worth mentioning that there were two additional stages with EDM, DJs, and other

stuff I don’t really care for, so it could have been worse for a lot of people.

The performances – and fragments of performances – I saw were mostly of good quality, but there was a weird hiccough in the middle of far too many sets, and it was always the same thing: an uninspired, halfassed cover. Don’t get me wrong, I love hearing great artists put their own spin on a wellknown song, but it felt as if every one of these was done at gunpoint with five minutes to prepare. Joel Plaskett bisected his set with a rough rendition of Lorde’s Royals in which he made attempts at notes so far above his range he didn’t have any business even being in the same room as them. He managed to sort of pull it off in a kind of cute and endearing way, but it was a questionable inclusion to an otherwise solid 45-minute set list.

Even the major headliners got in on the action. Mumford and Sons treated the biggest crowd of the festival to a shaky, entirely

unrehearsed rendition of Neil Young’s Harvest with far too many repeating refrains because nobody had an iPad on stage to look up the forgotten verses. It was a total sloppy turd in the middle of a big shiny rock concert, and nobody would have missed it had it never been there in the first place. These are professional, working musicians. They know when they suck, they know how to not suck, and yet somehow nearly every one decided that this crap was a good idea.

Sam Smith had it figured out. He featured his background singers for some well-polished Motown covers and they still fit seamlessly into the set better than any other covers at the festival, despite the fact that the big name himself was off to the side doing group harmonies.

Of Monsters and Men handled this obstacle better than anyone, boldly differentiating themselves by simply sticking to their own songs. Those crazy Icelanders.

At the end of the festival, I was surprised to find myself glad that no artists I consider to be my absolute favourites had been involved. It would have been disappointing to catch them for only a short 45-minute performance with an unforgettable-for-thewrong-reasons cover shoehorned into the middle. A favourite group headlining might be worth a festival day pass, but otherwise I’d much rather spend less money for a far more coherent and enjoyable concert in the city, with the added bonus of being able to get some damn sleep at the end of the night.

And for those who are thinking that I have a fifth option that I’m neglecting — going home to put on my sweatpants and cry myself to sleep while wondering why nobody cares about me — that’s not an option. I had multiple choices at the bar, all of whom wanted my affection in return. Not engaging in the hunt doesn’t make my sex life any better, nor does it make the candidates go away. Steve will give STI’s to a friend of mine, Justin will try to garner his experience on the wrong people and Tom will still be patronizing as fuck. They will still have an impact on me, whether I want them to or not. Isn’t it at least better to have some say in the decision?

This hypothetical situation, although an extreme example, illustrates the choices Canadians will be fronted with on Oct. 19. We get to decide who represents us, who gets our affection and essentially who we want to be in political bed with. None of them are going to be perfect, but in the words of Dan Savage, there isn’t one perfect someone out there.

There is a .65 and then you have to round up to one and make it work, and that takes engagement. It takes action on your part just as much as theirs. And sadly, you have to apply

this same philosophy to politicians. There just isn’t the perfect prince charming political figure out there.

We are in the middle of the longest election campaign in Canadian history, and it’s a really good time to care about issues. The economy is floating in the shitter and Canada is currently the only G7 country in a recession.

Student debt is crippling, and thus far, not one candidate has made even a mention to it. And in the decade Steve Harper has been in power, he has managed to alter political landscape of the country — less transparency, more government surveillance and overall less trust in Ottawa, which has been the stage for multiple scandals under Harper’s reign.

These are just a taste of the issues that deserve attention. Making a sober and informed choice heightens the chance of success, in both elections and looking for sex. And if, at the end of the night you end up with Tom when you really wanted Steve, at least you can say that you tried. You made a choice and it was the best one for you.

Elections and erections are very similar, as a wasted one is a wasted opportunity.

ALRIGHT, HEAR THIS Elections and erections Leah Scheitel COLUMNIST

THE CAPILANO COURIER VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

Elections sometimes garner attention for the wrong reasons, such as their alarmingly similar pronunciation to ‘erections’. To a political and sexual junkie like myself, both words get my ovaries salivating in different but equally exciting ways. Both things can be harmful to me in terms of my selfesteem and belief in humanity. After every one-night-stand and political story I engage in, I walk away wanting to shower, vowing to change my ways and that the next time, well, it will be different.

As someone who has indulged in both political porn and one-night stands for a decade now, I completely understand how unromantic it can be. After awhile, both politics and dating (which is the polite way to say fucking) can get so discouraging that it’s easier to give up and pretend not to care. But, at least for me, no matter how bad it gets — no matter how many times Harper gets re-elected or how many times I get rejected — I always care. I care because it matters who I’m electing and who I’m fucking. And it matters because it’s a choice — it’s my choice.

I get why people hate politics, I really do. But just as in choosing who and who not to have sex with affects you, choosing who and who not to elect affects you as well. Let’s make this hypothetical: say I get all dressed up and go out looking to get some, and at some bar I see three potential candidates who are all vying for my attention.

Guy A , Steve, has multiple STI’s that I don’t know about, and he will willingly infect me with, but he’s presenting himself to me as a reliable and trustworthy guy.

Guy B, Justin, is the handsome and young one out of the group, but his age works against him and I don’t believe that he has the experience to give me everything I need that night.

Guy C’s name is Tom and he’s one of those East Van hipsters that drinks solely out of mason jars. Everything he says sounds patronizing and he has a giant beard that he grooms more than I groom anything (hint).

The fourth option would be to experiment with a girl named Liz, but she just wants to fix all the wrongs in the world and doesn’t seem to know where to start.

This is like a grown-up Choose Your Own Adventure story.

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COLUMNS

@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

WHAT IF I LEAVE THIS TOWN? Walking away from familiar faces Sabrina Kuhn COLUMNIST As our campus rolls through the first week of school I can’t help but think about the place I have just left behind. I spent a full 18 years in a small town outside of Edmonton called Beaumont, Alberta. Aptly named due to the town’s literal location on a hill, Beaumont began as a French colony in 1895. The first building to be completed was, to no surprise, the Roman Catholic St. Vital Church, and the town grew out in residences, buildings and farms from this central point. The church is like the Northern Star — you always know where you are if you can see the lights from the cross on the highest point of the tower.

These French families that first settled still live in Beaumont today. I once witnessed one founding family reunion that had an attendance of over 400 people, once all the distantly-related cousins got under one roof.

I’d bet dollars to doughnuts that there were still whole families who weren’t able to make it that day.

To put it into better perspective, as of the 2013 census, Beaumont has a population of 14,916, with more and more middle class families with small children moving into town

every day. I was an out-of-town kid and that meant that I lived in the country on an acreage and my childhood was not like anyone else’s. My parents ran their own business, and so I have been helping with my mom’s catering company off the books since I was old enough to clear tables one plate at a time.

My friends were my parents’ employees, all local teenagers who are saints for putting up with my annoying the hell out of them while they were trying to get some work done. I was pretty isolated but the only reason I wasn’t a total shut in loser was because of those teenagers — they are my saving grace.

I had the added layer of being in the French Immersion program throughout school. There are a lot of binaries in Beaumont society: Christian or not, queer or not, Coloniale or J.E. Lapointe Junior High School, Conservative or Liberal, English or French speaking. These were the ways cliques and subcultures broke down. Honestly, it was some white middle-class kid bullshit.

I used to be intensely jealous of my classmates who live in town. They could bike to their friends’ houses or to the corner store, they played street hockey and in their neigh-

bours’ backyards, and they didn’t have to beg their parents to let them hang around town out since they could walk home. Beaumont is good for community building — there is no access to the city by any kind of public transport. Everyone pretty much knows of everyone else, which is both a blessing and a curse.

There aren’t many downfalls to living in Beaumont if you don’t mind a little geographic isolation from the big city. However, there is a big drug problem that is especially highlighted given the small population. The folks who don’t get out of town after high school, who don’t make anything of themselves become disenfranchised quickly and, with any predisposition to addiction, become the main demand for the drug supply.

It’s been a scary thing to witness some of my friends fall into.

Vancouver doesn’t seem like Beaumont at all. There is public transport that will take you all over Metro Vancouver, despite how long and crowded those bus rides may be. It is truly a big city in every sense, and the way I am in Vancouver is greatly different from Beaumont.

At home, I was a shit disturber. I used my resiliency to advocate for other queer and

trans youth in the community who couldn’t speak up for themselves for fear of backlash.

I put every part of my identity on display so that none of it could be used to hurt me. Being queer, being fat, being punk rock, they were all huge identifiers in a small town.

Big cities aren’t like that at all. I realized within my first semester that I am not being judged continuously because no one cares.

There are so many different kinds of people in this city that I am truly unremarkable. I blend in to a city of people just looking to live a good life, and that is a really exceptional thing to be a part of. The culture shock was beyond necessary to my liberal heart.

I’m quickly realizing that it takes a lot to figure out the ways in which my identity will shape my place in this world, and that’s what this column will be about. I am forced to unlearn a lot of the ideas that I picked up in a small town that straight-up don’t have space in my world anymore.

INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF PANCAKES Arrival survival

Carissa Konesky

THE CAPILANO COURIER

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

GUEST COLUMNIST On Thursday, Sept. 3, new international students and Capilano University’s international mentors met up for the first time at the New International Student Orientation.

From the energy and smiles in the room, not to mention the impressive turn out of almost 300 students, mentors, staff, faculty and partners combined, it was easy to see that this is going to be a very exciting term.

I knew immediately when I started at CapU that I wanted to join CapU’s International Leadership and Mentorship program. When I was in Grade 11 French, we were told about an opportunity to travel to Quebec to work over the summer. Even though I didn’t speak very much French, I had always had a desire to go on new adventures and travel, so I decided to apply for it.

After taking part in an interview, I was selected. For six weeks, I lived in a small town in Quebec and worked at a thrift store.

Neither my host family nor coworkers spoke English very well, which lead to me experiencing some difficult culture shock. I did have a roommate who was able to translate for me, but I still remember a lot of awkward dinner conversations and difficulty understanding directions at work. However, with time, we began to find ways to communicate with each other and I was able to improve my French and develop some great relationships in the process.

During the weekends, I got to go on some fabulous adventures with my fellow partici-

18

pants, including taking part in an Amazing Race challenge around Montreal, going on a camping trip, watching soccer and football games and going to the waterslides. My host family even took my roommate and myself on a trip to Quebec City for our last weekend. Overall, it was a great experience and I am glad I did it. Besides my trip to Quebec, I haven’t had the opportunity to travel very much, so I am very excited to learn about so many different cultures and countries through our international students.

At the start of each term, mentors are matched with new international students to provide peer-to-peer support and help make their transition to CapU easier. Mentors, organized into teams of six members, also plan a variety of cultural, social and educational events for international students to help them make the most out of their time at CapU and in Vancouver.

After connecting up with many of our new international students at orientation, I am very excited for the year ahead. I loved getting the chance to meet my new mentees and all of our international students and see everybody connecting up with one another. I know that we are all going to share a great term together.

For our new students and international students, I know that starting out in a new place can be daunting – I was terrified to start school at CapU last year. However, CapU is a great community with great people, so you don’t have to worry.

— DANIELLE MAINMAN

HUMOUR

@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

Editor's Note: The Courier received this letter from some dude named Chad talking about CapU’s lone frat, Delta Iota Kappa. We have never heard of DIK, but Chad asked nicely if we could publish his letter dedicated to all the new members, which apparently is every new student.

— CRISTIAN FOWLIE

Sup new bros, I’m Chad and I’m here to not only welcome you to Capilano University, but also to congratulate you on being accepted into the campus’ lone fraternity, Delta Iota Kappa (DIK). Unlike your our typical college frat, we don’t organize gruelling initiations for prospective bros, because, well, it’s Capilano University — you’re

already a DIKhead in our eyes.

I’ve been at Cap for a long time. In fact, I’ve been when throwing balls in cups since this place was a College, back a all you needed were frosted tips, an oversized polo shirt and I mixtape with Justin Timberlake’s Sexy Back to get you laid.

ds didn’t have anyone to guide me back then. There were no DIKhea to show me around. I was a one man DIK show.

Things have changed now. Our numbers are growing.

We’ve got you, and you’ve got us. Like that new Zac Efron movie,

We Are Your Friends.

It’s not easy being a DIKhead. A lot will be expected of We you. The good news is that your GPA doesn’t matter at DIK.

don’t care about that.

What we do care about is your beer pong game. You’re all expected to carry your weight around the table, so we require members to have at least a three cup per game average per ten ble games of six cup played. Anything lower is considered reasona

grounds for immediate termination of DIK status. We only use some Tim Horton’s cups for our games, so I recommend picking up and practicing now. The cups are free if you show the cafeteria ladies your six-pack — and lets face it, you were probably going to do that anyways.

Other than that six-pack, we don’t really have a dress

code. We do require that each mem ber be seen with a shaker cup during daylight hours though. But then again, you should really have one on you at all times anyw ays. It holds the right amount of protein for your post-wo rkout gains and it can carry up to 20 ounces of drinking water, which is the maximum amount you should be carrying with out looking like a freak with a 40-ounce water jug.

And bro, make sure you have the whis k ball inside your shaker cup at all times, even if you’ re just drinking water. The clanging sound that the metal makes as it hits the plastic cup is the soundtrack to your life. Shake that cup at every opportunity. Always look like you’ve just finished your work out. Eat clean, train hard and let ‘em know you’re here. S’all I got, bro.

CahD

PS: Bro, when you’re not partying, work ing out or re-watching all of Entourage while waiting for the new season of Suits, you should be doing all you can to get invite d to these panels that business students host. You don’t have to o be in bus business to build your brand.

PPS: Remember that we are all DIK DIKh IKh IK Kh K heads and no mem mbe mb ber be b err iis s b bigg bigge igger ggger or more important than any otheerr m mem ember. We are only only aas s s strongg as our weakest DIKhead and if we we s see a member dow own wn n and unab ble b le l to get up, we must lend them a han ha h hand and. Remember that at,, bro bro. A All hands on DIK. PPPS: Avoid the bathrooms in Fir.

A MAN OF MEANS

Finding the Average Family Andy Rice EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

—

Now that I think about it, that’s probably why we didn’t get approved.

I will promise you this though. If you go to canada411.ca and type ‘Average’ into the search field you will not be disappointed. Senate scandal be damned, Harper is telling you the absolute truth. The Average Family does exist and they live at 1516 Burnaby Street in Vancouver, BC. You can even call them.

Maybe they’ll share their $6,500 with you.

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Best of all, this family has a patriarch with just about the best given name you could hope for if your last name is Average.

Yes, it’s Joe. If you don’t believe me, look it up.

I’ll be waiting for your call, CBC. Your investigative news bureau needs me.

VOLUME 49 ISSUE NO. 02

making this family up? What does the Average Family look like? Where do they live? Do they really exist? I’m not sure if you’ve taken a look at Harper’s wife and kids lately, but his family looks pretty average to me. Is he talking about them? No wonder he seems to know so much about their financial situation.

These are all questions I can never hope to ask the Prime Minister, because the Capilano Courier is not one of the five previously-vetted and approved media outlets that actually get to make inquiries at each stop along the Conservative party’s campaign trail. Therefore, I decided to do some investigative reporting. Here at the Courier, that simply means a quick Google search.

THE CAPILANO COURIER

Stephen Harper has been talking a lot about the Average Family in the news lately — more than average, you might say. But as trustworthy as he truly is, I find it hard to believe that someone would ever choose to adopt Average as their surname. That’s like naming your business OK Tire — a thing someone in this country has already done so that nobody else ever has to.

At a campaign stop in Newcastle, Ontario on Aug. 26, Harper boasted that due to Conservative policies the Average Family has an additional $6,500 in their pockets. He mentioned them again a few days later in Ottawa.

Is the Average Family simply the John Doe of federal politics? Is Harper

19

THE CABOOSE

@CAPILANOCOURIER

WWW.CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

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COMMUNITY Are you selling a microwave? Giving away a couch? Looking for a longlost exotic pet? Submit a post to our FREE community classifieds board!

All you have to do is email editor@capilanocourier.com or send a text to 778-855-9942 before 9 am every Friday to make it in before our production deadline. Keep your post to 50 words or less and we’ll take care of rest.

Submissions are subject to editing for length.

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