Capilano Courier Vol. 45 Issue 6 by Capilano Courier

“Pushing buttons since 1968”

Volume 45

N O R T H V A N C O U V E R / / O cto b er 1 7 , 2 0 1 1

with Ec0-Fashion // Occupy Vancouver // Family Day // and so much more ...

Issue N o. 06

TABle of contents Vol. Fourty-Five | Issue 06

Pushing buttons since 1968

Contac t u s Praise? Damnation? Let us know what you think:

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604.984.4949

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604.984.1787

editor@capilanocourier.com Cont rib u t i n g

Are you a writer/illustrator/photographer? We'll pay you! Come to our story meetings:

TUESDAYS at NOON in MAPLE 122 Caveat lector

The Capilano Courier is an autonomous, democratically run student newspaper. Literary and visual submissions are welcomed. All submissions are subject to editing for brevity, taste, and legality. The Capilano Courier will not publish material deemed by the collective to exhibit sexism, racism, or homophobia. The views expressed by the contributing writers are not necessarily those of the Capilano Publishing Society.

News

Occupy Vancouver? Only if I get to occupy near a hotdog stand

Sta f f

C al e n d a r

The Capilano Courier is brought to you by the following people ...

Go get some Skrilla ... er, Skrillex. Whatever, man. Dubstep! editor-in-chief

editor-in-chief

Samantha Thompson

Sarah Vitet

Fe a t u r e s

Capilano gets filthy clean

Ar t s

production mngr.

a rt d i r e c t o r

f e at u r e s e d i t o r

news editor

Shannon Elliott

JJ Brewis

AdĂŠlie Houle-Lachance

Gurpreet Kambo

Vancouver Fashion Week not entirely exercise in futility

Columns

Dexter breaks down the Occupy Wall Street movement for anyone living under a rock a rt s e d i t o r

opinions editor

Claire Vulliamy

Marco Ferreira

humor

fiction editor

Kevin Murray

copy editor

Celina Kurz

O pi n i o n s

Goverment taxes fat; thank god I have a silo of butter stockpiled in my yard

s ta f f w r i t e r

Evelyn Cranston

events mngr.

Jonty Davies

C ab o o s e business manager

web editor

Ricky Bao

Natahsha Prakash

Blake Bamford quits punning; but don't worry everyone! Celina is puns of fun!

the cove

TiarÉ jung Tiare thinks that a common interest in food is a solid basis for friendship. She has many friends and eats a lot of vegan baking. If she was a spice, she would be cardamom. Go taste her art: → appiesforeyeballs.tumblr.com

{ WORLD* } This

WEEK in the

What’s got us all riled up in the office this week?

Lindsay Lohan's teeth rotting out of her head. Freaky Friday!

from the editor //

We’re not in Kansas anymore

s unelected citizens of Canada, we don’t have as much power as we like to pretend we do. The most power that we have in a “democratic” society is when we cast our ballots during an election. Once our ballots are cast, however, we surrender any ability to control what happens next. The elected politicians go off to City Hall, the Legislature, or the House of Commons and sit in big comfy chairs and act like they rule the world (which they do). Once elected, they don’t have to listen to citizen concerns, and there is no real way to keep them accountable. Late last week, it was announced that Topeka, a city in Kansas, would officially be repealing its law on domestic violence. Although the county district attorney has not been prosecuting domestic violence since September, the repeal of the law has caused an uproar – with good reason. Since the city stopped new prosecutions, there have been at least 35 reported cases of domestic battery or assault, and 18 people who were jailed were then released without facing charges. Elected officials did not see these statistics as persuasive enough to prevent the decriminalization of domestic violence, however. The reason for the decriminalization is, of course, money. The city has cited budget shortfalls, resulting in an inability to provide the funding necessary to keep those charged with domestic violence in jails. The county, too, has listed a lack of funding for their inability to prosecute these cases. It has also been stated by Topeka’s city council that repealing the law will encourage the district to take on the prosecution of these cases, which is where they feel the jurisdiction should be. Interim city manager Dan Stanley told the Associated Press that deciding to repeal the law allows them to “negotiate from a position of strength.” While the city and the county duke it out, cases of domestic violence will go unpunished, which is a significant problem. “I absolutely do not understand it,” said Rita Smith, executive director of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, to the Associated Press. “It’s really outrageous that they’re playing with family safety to see who blinks first. People could die while they’re waiting to straighten this out.” The decriminalization of such a serious crime is ultimately an

irresponsible decision, particularly for a category of crime in which a significant number of incidents go unreported to police every year. It is a strange message to be broadcasting to victims of domestic violence: that their situation is not serious enough to be prosecuted, and that it is not considered a “crime” under the law, despite the fact that they have been assaulted by violent criminals. Several days after the announcement of the law repeal, likely because of the heavy criticism from the public that followed the decision, Shawnee County District Attorney Chad Taylor agreed to step forward and review the cases while the budgetary battle between Topeka and Shawnee County continued. Although citizen opinion was acknowleged in this situation, the reality is that there is no system of accountability in place that ensures that politicians have to listen to the citizens once they have been elected. The domestic violence law should never have been repealed in order to balance a budget. Because establishing consensus between politicians and the public is time-consuming, democratic systems elect small numbers of people who are supposed to represent entire populations. However, elected officials often forget their constituents and vote according to their own personal interests, rather than the needs of their voters. Balanced budgets (aka “the Economy”) become more important than any other issue, and are generally used during campaigning to show that a candidate is responsible. This is a clear indication of an irresponsible government, as a responsible government would prioritize human rights over every other budget line item. Supporting equal rights should never be a choice. Although this example occurred in America, the same kinds of bad decisions are frequently made in Canada as well: the tar sands, for example. That we have to find a balance between supporting equal rights and maintaining finances in the first place, and that the rights of individuals are not automatically prioritized, reveals more about our society and its systemic problems than anything else ever could. — Sarah Vitet // editor-in-chief

The Voicebox

with JJ Brewis SPOTTED: Shia LeBeouf in town, biking shirtless. LOL!

Norwich Terriers – the most twee dog breed still posessing acceptable levels of cool?

Look for the Voicebox on Tuesday afternoons in the Birch cafeteria, to anonymously “voice” your “opinion” on any “topic.” Introverted alternatives include emailing your opinion to voicebox@capilanocourier.com, or texting (778) 886-5070.

“Rogers Alert: You have reached 80% of your data plan allowance. Additional charges will apply for exceeding your allowance in this invoice period.” I blame mobile porn and Tap Tap Justin Bieber game. “Why don’t you love Beethoven? I am Beethoven!! Why don’t you love me?!!”

New Shatner album is stocking stuffer of the year

White iPhone – why bother?

Maybe if Beethoven wasn’t such a pain-in-the-ass trolling St. Bernard (who, by the way, wasn’t even cute! WTF!). Or if he was actually badass enough to cut his ear off, like legend says (he didn’t, it was Van Gogh, dummies). In reality, if all the classical composers were equated to today’s pop culture, Beethoven would be the Kelly Rowland to Tchaikovsky’s Beyonce. You think Fur Elise holds a candle to Swan Lake? Bitch, please. Sure, maybe Gary “Sirius Black” Oldman played him in a biopic, but that shit pales in comparison to what Tchaikovsky’s influence lent to Black Swan. You don’t see Natalie Portman busting a nut over String Quartet #14, duh. “I have a love-hate relationship with the word ‘panties.’ It simultaneously freaks me out and turns me on. I also feel this way about reading personal trash in the Voicebox.”

* List not comprehensive

70 0 5 . 6 8 8 . 8 77

Text

I bet you I can guarantee exactly what the person who sent this in looks like. I mean, really. You’re totally the same person who can’t handle it any time someone uses the word “moist,” or any time your barista’s fingers touch your hand when they pass you your change back. Yeah, that shit’s gross. Or when someone’s long hair in the skytrain touches you when there’s a sharp turn? So gross, right? Yeah. I know you. We should hang out and talk about how gross human contact is. Don’t even get me started on sexual intercourse. So germ! “No smile back? ;)” What? “I smiled when I saw you working away. I’m studying here once again.” I’m sorry. Who is this? “Oh, you deleted me again? Sorry. It’s Steven.” Actually, I never added you back into my phone. And for the record I didn’t see you walk by my desk. “Oh, haha. Try to spot me next time. I don’t have a beard anymore.” What? “I’ll see you on Saturday!” I’d really appreciate it if you’d leave me alone at work.

new s

EDIT OR // Gurpreet Kambo // ne w s @ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

THE FUSE HAS BEEN LIT

NEws Brie fs

Occupy Vancouver latest action in global movement for the “99%” By Mike Conway // writer

s the Occupy Wall Street movement continues to capture the world’s imagination, a more local group, Occupy Vancouver, hit the street for the first time with an event at the art gallery on Oct. 15 (which is after the Courier press deadline). The event is planned to go on indefinitely, and will also march to “capitalist hot spots in the surrounding area.” The official statement of Occupy Vancouver, which was approved at a general assembly of more than a hundred people, states, “We, the 99%, come together with our diverse experiences to transform the unequal, unfair, and growing disparity in the distribution of power and wealth in our city and around the globe. We challenge corporate greed, corruption, and the collusion between corporate power and government.” It continues, “We oppose systemic inequality, militarization, environmental destruction, and the erosion of civil liberties and human rights. We seek economic security, genuine equality, and the protection of the environment for all.” The original movement, Occupy Wall Street, began with a centrefold in Vancouver-based, anti-corporate group Adbusters, which read, “What is our one demand? Occupy Wall Street on Sept. 17. Bring tent.” It started as a protest against the breakdown of the economic system in the United States, but has since grown into a movement to address a number of social grievances, with the only real unifying theme being the commonly cited slogan, “We are the 99%.” Capilano University student James Fraser was in attendance at the planning assemblies, and at the rally. He says, “Since primary school, I’ve been told that anyone of us can make a differ-

ence in this world. I guess I saw an opportunity to try and fulfill that. I personally hope that the Occupy protests will be a catalyst for discussions on the issues that Canada (and Vancouver) faces; problems such as homelessness, the violation of lands by corporations such as Enbridge, and the need for increased consideration of our nation’s ecological future on this planet.” “The protests can’t be boiled down to a simple sound bite,” wrote Edward Murray in an article for the Huffington Post. This is because the Occupy movement is not aimed at one social problem in particular but, as Murray puts it, “ambitiously seeking a complex, fundamental, philosophical change in the social, political, and economic infrastructure of our country. The strength of Occupy … lies in the ambiguity of its mission. There is no laundry list of specific, unreasonable, and untenable demands. There is only the demand or change.” “No one individual, including organizers, is able to speak for the whole as we all represent facets of a larger whole,” says Rob Fib Woodruff, a member of Occupy Vancouver’s Legal Planning Committee. This type of response is common throughout the Occupy movement, both here in Canada and the United States. For better or for worse, there is no leader, no one true goal. For Fraser, this was an attractive point that encouraged him to get involved. “No leader or organizing party means less likelihood of a hidden agenda, no one to buy off, no one to ‘dispose’ of,” he says, “and it means all voices are more likely to be valued by the merit of their words.” Globally, the fervour of protest has gripped many countries this past year. Protest movements have taken shape all over the world, from the Arab Spring, to the anti-austerity protests in England, Greece, Spain, Belgium, and Ireland,

and finally in the United States and Canada through the Occupy movements. The protests have been about people, according to New York Times writer Chris Hedges, “who feel they have no other option but to physically obstruct the forces of control.” Occupy Wall Street, then, fits into this context of people who as individuals have little power, but in coming together there is a realization that they are more powerful than they ever could have imagined. “The real people who are scared are the power elite. Of course, they’re trying to make you scared and us scared,” Hedges writes. “But I can tell you … that on the inside they’re very, very frightened. They do not want movements like this to grow, and they understand on some level – whether it’s subconscious or, in other cases, even overt – that the criminal class … has seized power.” Fraser is also inspired by the global context in which the Occupy movements have sprung up. “There's [sic] 146 occupy protests from Madrid to Jerusalem. There are protestors in Dublin, there are protests about to hit London, and the movement is spreading. Even if the Wall Street protests fizzle out and die, there has been a fuse lit,” says Fraser. “An idea has been put in the minds of many people across the world that we can work together to sort out our collective problems; that maybe the idea of a Global Village is not such a faraway ideal.” The movement has even hit campus. A facebook group recently emerging called “Occupy Capilano University.” It doesn’t have a specific action posted yet, but the page says to “stay posted.” The Occupy Vancouver statement encapsulated the sentiment that has inspired so many locally: “Let them gawk, let them ask questions, let them wake up.”

New Executives Coming to the CSU The fall 2011 elections have concluded, the dust has cleared, and the winning candidates have emerged as follows: Educational Issues Coordinator REMEDIOS, Nolan Environmental Issues Coordinator ANDERSON, Heidi First Nations Students' Liaison RENO, Dolly International Students' Liaison MORALES DE LA FUENTE, Gilberto Social Activities Coordinator KOEBEL, Amelia Social Justice Coordinator GRANT, Teresa Students of Colour Liaison NASIRPOUR, Saam Students with Disabilities Liaison STEWART, Sean Women's Liaison LIVESEY, Alysia The final turnout was 596 voters, or 8.36 per cent of the student body.

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 6

By Gurpreet Kambo // News Editor, and Samantha Thompson // Editor-in-Chief

New Film Building Almost Done (really!) Capilano University's own Chinese Democracy is nearing completion, according to Capilano University President Kris Bulcroft. At a meeting with the CSU executive last Wednesday, she said that “substantial completion” would be finished by Oct 31, and that the building would be occupiable by December. The building has already far exceeded its original budget and timeline, and if it is not completed by Oct. 31, the project will lose its government funding, forcing the University to have to seek out more private funding. // Natahsha Prakash

By Gurpreet Kambo // News Editor

N e ws

This Is Your Brain On Drugs Neuroscientist and former drug addict Marc Lewis brings his life experience to Capilano By Leah Scheitel // Writer

“D

rugs are a great way into the brain. You get to understand the brain by seeing what drugs do to it,” said Dr. Marc Lewis during a talk at Capilano University on the evening Oct. 6. At the event, he discussed his new book, Memories of an Addicted Brain, which weaves Dr. Lewis’s personal memories as a former addict with his professional background as a neuroscientist. His lecture focused on how addiction affects the brain: what causes people to become addicts, why the urges and cravings are so strong, and what can be done about it. Lewis’s experience with drugs, both medical and recreational, is vast. He started at the age of 16, when his parents sent him to boarding school in Boston from Toronto, his hometown. There, depressed and homesick, he started drinking, smoking pot, and ingesting cough syrup to get high. After boarding school, he went to California to attend Berkeley University. It was in California where he was introduced to harder drugs – LSD, heroin, and mescaline. Lewis was addicted to a variety of substances for the better part of 15 years. While he was on an internship in Thunder Bay, Ontario, he was caught stealing drugs from the medical lab. He was kicked out of the University of Windsor, where he was studying to become a psychologist, and returned to Toronto, broke, dumped, and still

addicted. He started at the bottom, washing windows and painting houses, and worked his way up to eventually return to university and earned his doctorate. “Natural goodies like food and sex certainly follow the progression from liking to wanting,” he writes. “Feels good, and you want more.” He explains that dopamine, the brain’s “goodfeeling” chemical, is triggered during pleasurable stimuli such as food or sex. Certain drugs such as opioids cause a huge rush of dopamine into the brain, though with diminishing returns each time. This means that each time you take the drug, your body requires more of it to get the same feeling back; in other words, the beginnings of addiction. His lecture focused on five points: an individual’s sensitivity to drug abuse, how addiction starts, “ego-fatigue” and the loss of self-control, defiance, and finally, the internal voices that cause an addict to relapse. Sensitivity to drug abuse differs for every individual. Temperament and experience can cause kids to start experimenting with substances. Lewis explains, “Different kids have different chemical needs: the need for power, the need for control, the need for warmth and acceptance.” Opioids make the brain feel warm, safe, and happy, and if someone isn’t feeling this naturally, they may turn to drugs to find those sensations. Addiction is caused by something that Dr. Lewis calls “corruptive learning.” When the brain learns something new, a multiple of synapses oc-

// Miles Chic cur in the brain, causing a network to be formed. Addiction happens when the synaptic networks become cemented in the brain, and powered by neurochemicals in the drugs.” Then, he explains, “you learn that’s the thing you want, that’s the thing that you need, and you’ll do anything to get it.” Ego-fatigue is a process by which the addicted person loses self-control, and their ability to resist desires and bad behaviours, something that

Lewis spoke about in-depth during his lecture. “I’m not going to drink tonight, I am going to go home,” Lewis says is a typical the person might tell him or herself. However, at this stage, the person’s resolve will not hold, because, as Lewis says, “you lose the capacity to inhibit it.” Lewis points out that addicts are not weak people, contrary to popular belief. They are exhausting their egofatigue and self-control to the point where they just can’t say no. Dr. Lewis says to make the loss of self-control justifiable, the addicted brain becomes defiant, believing that it can do whatever it wants. At this stage, the addict’s inner dialogue imposes selfinduced shame, which leads to further anger and rage. To ease these feelings of failure and low self-esteem, the addicted brain searches for more dopamine, and drugs. This perpetuates the cycle of addiction. According to Lewis, this is the stage in which the addict must act most forcefully to resist the addiction. He says, “You must add new voices to the chorus of shame. Add the word no.” According to Lewis, the best word an addict can say is “no”. Saying no causes the brain to create a synaptic network with that action. The more it says no, the stronger that network becomes, and the easier it is to stay away from drugs. “Addiction is really hard to understand,” Lewis told Canada A.M. during an interview on Oct. 50. “That’s why it’s important to talk about the brain processes that are going on and that make it so difficult to stop.”

Can this article get more fans than Professor Snape? Students, teachers take to Facebook to complain

Canada, America, and the UK, has never been a source of trouble to a professor, as far as Madeley knows. This is very different from how a group of University of Calgary students were treated after creating a group to vent about a professor. Twins Keith and Steven Pridgen have been embroiled in a legal battle with the university since being placed on 24 months of academic probation for their membership in a Facebook group called, “I NO Longer Fear Hell, I Took a Course with Aruna Mitra.” The group was not private, Keith said, though “it was not intended to be for the public. The Facebook group's creator, Tom Strangward, said that he did not really think about that aspect of it when he made the group.” The Pridgens won their case against the U of C in late 2010, when Justice Jo-Ann Strekaf ruled that the university was required by the Charter of Rights and Freedoms to respect the Pridgens’ right to free speech. In early 2010, the U of C announced its intention to appeal the ruling, claiming it was seeking “clarification.” Keith Pridgen said the appeal hearing “could reasonably be heard before the court by early November, although the date is not set in stone as of yet.” When asked about the Pridgens’ case, Madeley said she hopes students exhaust every possible official option before turning to online complaining when faced with an unsatisfactory teacher.

“I think the fact that [the U of C group] was public was more of a problem,” she said. “Professors have contracts, they need to meet tenure; if review committees were looking at it, that would be inappropriate, in the same way that Rate My Professor is inappropriate for [assessing professors].” Pridgen said he and his brother had, in fact, already contacted the university through conventional channels, and had met with no success. “We brought questions to the professor during class,” he said. “Then we began to appeal our grades to the head of the program.” After this led to many students receiving an even lower grade, Pridgen said they took their complaint to the associate dean of law. This led to higher grades for many students, but the Pridgens also found out that the head of their program, who had lowered their grades, was married to the professor they were upset with. “It was only after all this that we decided to join a Facebook group intended only for fellow students to voice their concerns about the professor.” On the other side of this fraught relationship is Madeley, who said that it can be difficult to teach class upon class of students who expect more and more from professors in return for less and less work from the students. "[Teaching] really is such a demoralizing experience, sometimes,” said Madeley.

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 6

share complaints about students and sometimes post hypothetical scathing responses to student // C.U.P Prairies & Northern Bureau Chief emails, it is more often a venue “for self-support." ASKATOON (CUP) — The university “It’s also very helpful to know that the kinds of teacher-student dynamic can be a strange things we’re facing, others are facing them too,” one: on one hand, students are students, Madeley said. “It’s a morale thing.” and should reasonably be expected to act acThe private group, which has members from cordingly, deferring to professors as superiors and as more knowledgeable. On the other hand, students know they pay a good chunk of their professors’ salary, and this can sometimes lead to students feeling as though they deserve more equal footing with their instructors. Professor June Madeley of the University of New Brunswick is one of a growing number of post-secondary instructors who has found a distinctly modern way to deal with the frustrations of an increasingly entitled student body. “That’s PROFESSOR Uptight to you, Johnny” is a private Facebook group where professors meet to gripe about students and support each other. Madeley, who joined two years ago when a colleague forwarded the group to her, says it fills an important void in instructors’ professional lives. “In public schools, in high schools, they have a staff room. I’m sure they have conversations about frustrating things there,” she says. “Profs don’t have that [in universities]. There isn’t a lot of room for commiserating.” // Haley Whishaw Madeley also explained that while professors By Tannara Yelland

news

MAKE IT RAIN Passion Piece raises money and awareness for Raincity Housing By Celina Kurz // Copy editor

“M

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 6

any passions, one purpose” was the slogan for Passion Piece, a fundraising music event that took place on Thursday at the Anza Club. Inspired by support from an anonymous donor, former Capilano students Amanda Cook and Miryam Bishop put the event together to encourage others to express their passions and draw support for a local cause. The cause this year was supporting local nonprofit organization Raincity Housing, but Cook hopes to target other organizations next year and anticipates to eventually run the show as a festival. “We want it to be a lot more than [a benefit concert], we want it to be an event where people can bring their capabilities, and donate what they can do,” said Cook. An audience comprised mostly of universityage youth was drawn in to the sounds of local bands including The Boom Booms and Ponderosas. They participated in a raffle, and got their faces painted or feather-extensions put in their hair by donation. On every table, painted puzzle pieces accompanied brochures from Raincity Housing. Cook was drawn to Raincity because she appreciated the easy accessibility of information on their website and their clear vision: “A home for every person.” After visiting the shelter, the reality of where their money should go hit home:

government; however, such events are even more important in that they expose the significance of their work. “An event like this heightens our profile, and may lead to regular people who want to donate,” says Briscall. Located in the Downtown Eastside of Vancouver, Raincity Housing aims not only to provide housing, but also help break the cycle of homelessness. They set themselves apart from other programs in Vancouver because of their “housing first” approach, providing shelter for the street-ridden even if they are unstable and substance users. “People have had to get to a certain point to access a certain [type of] housing,” explains Bricall. “For example, if someone was using, they wouldn't qualify. We want to get a roof over peoples heads, look at the issues, and address the issues. We've had people who remain housed through the program.” Homelessness is a visible issue in Vancouver, and Briscall, who has been working at Raincity Housing for more than ten years, explains that he first fell into the mistake of trying to fix people // Katie So without acknowledging that it is another person's “I had a chance to go to the shelter and speak life. People fall into the cycle of homelessness with the people who work there. I hope to spend due to substance use and acquire health issues more time and continue to support them,” and addictions; the real catalyst for change is a said Cook. positive environment, which programs such as Bill Briscall, communications manager, ex- Raincity's aim to provide, according to Briscall. plains that Raincity Housing encourages such “They have a supportive environment where events because people want to help and be they were being supported for issues that lead to involved. Raincity depends on financial sup- addiction. They may have experienced health isport from third-party events, donors, and the sues and our job is finding what they needed and

not reacting,” said Briscall. The funds from Passion Piece will be put towards the Healthy Living program at Raincity, an initiative that provides the second step after clients receive shelter. “It's about getting out of survival mode and [teaching them to] do something with their time. They join a photography club, become involved in a community garden or an art class,” said Briscall. Working with a community integration support worker, they begin to find a purpose in their lives. Greg Cornish, a resident of the Downtown Eastside, is one of the more successful participants in the program. An avid volunteer and selfdescribed social butterfly, his problem was never substance addiction or crime. He found himself homeless after losing his family and home, and suffering from a stroke that left him partially paralyzed and unable to work. “If not for this program, I would be on the streets,” he said. Cornish has been active in the program and helped equip the deck on his floor with his carpentry work. In addition to volunteering regularly through the program and for the city of Vancouver, he hopes to eventually get back into the workforce and live independently. Although Raincity doesn't have a volunteer program, Briscall encourages anyone to participate by donating and being involved in fundraising events. In regards to the students who organized Passion Piece he says, “It's great that people take initiative and arrange events like [this] that they are passionate about.”

the ca p ca l e n da r C e l i na W i th

Kur z !

COPY@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

m o n d ay o c t. 1 7 SPECIAL PLACES : AN EVENING WITH DAME FIONA REYNOLDS “Join the Land Conservancy … and learn about the National Trust's role in public engagement through a visual presentation.” I literally stopped comprehending what this even is after I read the title. Special places. A dame?? I don't even … what. What the fuck. Doors 7, present. VanDusen Botanical Gardens. By donation.

t u e s d a y o c t. 1 8 PARADE OF LOST SOULS FESTIVAL This is such a cool festival! This year, the festival will feature two weeks of workshops that will culminate with the Secret Souls Walk. Check out their website www.publicdreams.com and find something that seems neat for YOU. Halloween! I love it. I can handle this kind of Halloween thing so much better than Fright Nights. Runs from Oct. 18-29. Various locations.

w e d . o c t. 1 9 HOW TIME FLIES : AN EVENING WITH WILLIAM SHATNER To infinity … and beyond! 7:30 PM. The Centre in Vancouver for Performing Arts (777 Homer St.). $47.25-$141

ONE WEEK ANNIVERSARY OF EVANESCENCE'S NEW ALBUM Just in case you missed it last week, you can still pick this baby up! Featuring sure-to-become classics like “My Heart Is Broken,” “End of the Dream,” “Erase This,” and “Made of Stone,” this album is definitely going to enter regular rotation into my discman. LOL JK I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO LISTEN TO IT AT ALL. $11.98 on their website.

UBC MUSIC AT ROBSON SQUARE Free classical music! This afternoon of music features “UBC Chamber Strings and small string chamber ensembles.” If you don't have school, you and a girl or a boy should make a date to go to this. I think this would be a really cute romantic date. You can just walk around and talk about how you comprehend the entire world. It's real this time. Classical music. Noon. Robson Square. Free!

OCCUPY CAPILANO UNIVERSITY At some point this week, this is going to happen! According to one of the organizers, they're planning on occupying the cafeteria and there are some teachers on board to cancel classes. Check out their facebook group for more information. Ongoing. Capilano University. Free(dom)!

NEXT MUSIC FROM TOKYO VOL. 3 This event is a “one-of-a-kind tour taking the audience on a virtual trip to a gig in Tokyo’s fascinating underground music scene,” and features four of Tokyo's killin'est bands, Natsumen, Chiina, Akai Kouen, and Hyacca, as well as local faves the SSRIs. This sounds rad! I love Japan, I really do. Doors 7, show 8:30 PM. The Biltmore Cabaret (2755 Prince Edward St.). $8/10

DID YOU KNOW THAT On Oct. 18, 1985, Super Mario Bros. for Nintendo was released. Celebrate by playing this classic game with your besties! NOW YOU KNOW

CELEBRITY CHEF EMERIL WEDNESDAY This is a day where people traditionally dress as celebrity chef Emeril LaGasse. Some consider him the “original” celebrity chef; some simply admire him for his portly, jolly demeanour. Let us celebrate the life of this man by filling in our eyebrows to make them look thick and healthy, and wearing a white chef cloak. All day. Everywhere. Cost of chef cloak.

THE GREAT PUMPKIN : PUMPKIN CARVING CONTEST AND URBAN SEED-SAVING WORKSHOP Show off your carving skills at this event! For only $2, you can bring your carved pumpkin to this event for the chance to win bragging rights. There's nothing better than winning a competition! If you only want to participate in the workshop, you can register on their website and it's free! 11:30 AM – 1 PM. SFU Burnaby Pocket Markey (@Cornerstone-Burnaby Campus). $2.

t h u r s d a y o c t. 2 0 JERSDAY THURSDAY I'm not even 100% sure if there are new episodes of the Jersey Shore coming out right now, but even if there aren't I know I have a lot to catch up on. I haven't even gotten to the part where Ronnie and Mike get into a fight! I'm so a month and a half ago, ugh. 10 PM. In my bed, with my laptop.

PASTIES AND PAINT: AN EVENING OF ART AND BURLESQUE Vandolls Burlesque hosts an event that promises to “combine burlesque, art, food, and wine.” Raw Canvas is a neat little cafe/venue that offers paints to use and canvasses to buy so you can make art while you eat and drink and, in this case, presumably watch some burlesque. Neat-o! 8 – 10 PM. Raw Canvas (1046 Hamilton St.). $5.

DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE AT ROGERS ARENA I remember high school. Do you remember high school? In Science 10, this girl named Madi showed me “Sound of Settling” and I literally thought it was the best song I'd ever heard. SIIIGH. Ben Gibbard, so dreamy. 7:30 PM. Rogers Arena. $37.45-$66.15

LIVE AUDIENCE FOR YTV HIT SERIES “MR. YOUNG” It's your chance to be the laugh track! Even better, it's for YTV, so you get the chance to see what happens behind the scenes at everyone's favourite channel from when they were kids. Maybe Sugar still works there! Email mryounglive@gmail.com for booking information, or call 604-433-0779. 4 – 10 PM. The Mr. Young sound stage in South Burnaby. Free!

SKRILLEX ALL-AGES SHOW My Japanese cousin was all stoked on this when I saw her on Thanksgiving; personally, I'm not big on dubstep, but it seems like everyone else is for some reason. To each their own. Womp womp womp womp womp womp womp! That's all I have to say. Am I dubstep??? 6 – 11 PM. PNE Forum. Sold out!!! But there's another show tomorrow night.

MY SISTER AND MY GRANDMA'S BIRTHDAYS! Happy birthday Emily and Grandma Lila! Lots of love! To everybody else whose birthday is today, happy birthday! It's birthday Saturday! <3 <3 <3

BELLINGHAM COMICON Just a couple of hours south of the border! Check out their website at www.bellinghamcomicon. com to see if anyone exhibiting is interesting to your personal comic interests. Dress up like a Pokemon! Practice for Halloween! 10 AM – 5 PM. Ferndale Events Centre (5715 Varret Rd., Ferndale, WA). $6/free for kids under 7!

SUNDAE SUNDAY This one's a classic: get your friend(s) together, get some nice choco-caramel sauces, some nice sprinkly things, some choco-chips, some marsh-mallows, and most importantly, some vanilla-ass ice cream, and have yourself a sundae makin' PARTY. Just let it all out. Express yourself through ice cream. Who are you?? All day. Om-nom-nom-ville. Cost of supplies.

AN EXHIBITION OF RARE BOOKS ILLUSTRATING THE KING JAMES BIBLE The name of this event pretty much says it all. I bet Dame Fiona Reynolds will end up hitting this up if she stays in Vancouver this long before going back to her homeland which I assume is England. 9 AM – 5PM, will be open until Oct. 29. UBC's Irving K. Hall Learning Centre (2329 West Mall).

friday oct 21. EAT A DICK PHIL SPECTOR Seven all-female bands rock the stage at 360 Glen. Local bands Bitch Moves, Love Cuts, The Courtneys, Blondewich, Open Relationship, Yung Mums, and Juvie are featured, along with DJs Andrea Lukic of Nu Sensae and Daniel R, this sounds, frankly, incredibly awesome. Eat a dick!!! 10:30 PM – 1:30 AM. 360 Glen Dr. $10.

s at u rday o c t. 2 2 LAST-MINUTE ART SHOW AT THE COBALT FEATURING CHEETAH FROM THE COURIER She says she's only entering a small submission, but whatever, that still counts as featuring. It is tentatively called the Mixed Nut Show and will also be featuring super-cool graffiti artists Ensoe and Sueme, as well as other graduates of Capilano. 7:30 – 10 PM. The Cobalt. Possibly free! No promises.

s u n day o c t. 2 3 LATE AFTERNOON JAZZ JAM @ CAFE MONTMARTRE Capilano jazz program legend Cary Campbell is hosting this event every Sunday. If he hasn't invited you to the facebook event yet because you don't know him, go anyway! Meet him, he's a bro! The event says “all welcome” so that includes you, punk. 4:30 – 7:30 PM. Cafe Montmartre (4362 Main St.). By donation.

ROCK N ROLL PIZZA PARTY Free friggin' pizza, guys! Rocking out and eating pizza! This week features bands Hermetic, Bitch Moves, and Inherent Vices, as well as DJs Tyler Fedchuk and Kyle Scully. And it's only $7! Some places you pay more than that for just the pizza! 9 PM – 2 AM. The Biltmore Cabaret (2755 Prince Edward St.). $7 (+FREE PIZZA BONUS).

SKRILLEX ALL-AGES SHOW AGAIN See, I told you. They made another show! This one has tickets left, so go get one if you want to and haven't yet! Womp womp womp womp womp womp womp. 6 – 11 PM. PNE Forum. $69 (lol)

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FALL FASHION SHOW Local fashion boutique Scout is hosting a fall fashion show, featuring fashion from Yumi, Pink Martini, Stop Staring!, Pinup Couture, Betty Page and the “ever fantastic” TrunkShow by Misty Greer, as well as a performance by “East Van's resident play boy poet Jurek Szymczak” and tons of super sales! Shows at 8 and 9 PM. Scout Boutique (152 E. 8th St.). Free (but spend some money, c'mon you deserve it)!

FRIGHT NIGHTS AT PLAYLAND I'm such a dummy! Fright Nights actually started last Friday. What better way to start getting HYPED for Halloween? Fun fact: I've never been to Fright Nights because I'm too scared. When I was a kid, I used to pretend to not get scared from haunted houses, so I'd go in ones that were too scary for me, which has kind of messed me up, frankly. Maybe I'll go this year. MAYBE. Runs until Oct. 31. Playland. $28–33

F e at u r es

EDIT OR // Adél ie Houl e- Lachance // s pe c i al fe ature s . c apc o uri e r@ gmai l . c o m

CUTTInG EDGE SWORD FIGHTING Meet Academie Duello By Michael Bastien // Writer

he sword has played a large role in the history of humankind. Not just a weapon of early warfare, the sword also has a romanticized element, from Arthurian legends to the Three Musketeers. As firearms started to replace the blade in the field of warfare, the sword was adopted by nobles to settle disputes and defend one's honour in duels. Even today, it is still exciting to see sword fights in modern entertainment, such as in movies or theatre. If you are interested in learning how to wield a sword with a modern twist, then you might want to check out Academie Duello, Located at 412 West Hastings St. Academie Duello is a studio dedicated to Western martial arts. Inside the building there is a store, a museum, and a training area. The store offers a variety of arms, armour, equipment, and books to satisfy one's needs and interests. The historical museum has a collection of swords that range from 1500 BC – 1940 AD, several different polearms, and a suit of plate armour, amongst others.

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THE PEOPLE OF ACADEMIE DUELLO

“As a martial art, and I have practiced several, it captured me because of how powerful, intricate, and graceful it is,” explains Devon Boorman, Maestro d’Armi of Academi Duello. “I feel like it is an art that I can be a student of for years to come, and that it will continue to teach me new lessons. I love the competitive side of it, pitting your skills and wits against another opponent. The discipline and focus required to build and hone your skills. There is also a meditative type of connection you get when working with a weapon as an extension of your body.” With the equipment available at the studio, students can safely practice about 90 per cent of the martial art at full speed. By practising this way, students get a sense of authenticity and find out if they are doing it right. The students who go to Academie Duello are a diverse group. The age ranges from eight to 60 and come from many different backgrounds, such as chefs, educators, and construction workers. “I'd say most people that come into the school are looking for a unique way to get fit, connect with their bodies, and challenge themselves to learn something new and exciting,” Boorman explains. Members also love the connection with rich European history. The studio teaches members to follow the knightly virtues, such as honour and chivalry. The goal is to practise this martial art with a rich tradition now, in the present. However, the studio isn’t focused on re-enactment; all members wear modern, comfortable clothing. DUELLING ON STAGE “Personally, I started in theatre,” explains David McCormick, who is an instructor at Academie Duello as well as combat teacher for several theatre companies and high schools. “When I was at the University of Waterloo, I took a stage combat class and I really loved it.” The stage combat workshop teaches actors and stunt people how to safely and convincingly create the illusion of combat for theatre and movies. The course covers sword, quarter staff, and

unarmed combat to create convincingly violent punches, slaps, and chokes. The course also incorporates dramatics so actors will be able to show emotion, recite lines, and move around the stage with purpose, all the while focusing on the fight choreography. At the end of the course, participants will be able to receive a Fight Directors Canada (FDC) certificate. The FDC, according to their website, sets “the national standard for stage combat recognized by the Canadian Actors Equity Association and known worldwide for safe performance of thrilling violence in theatre and film.” For the swashbuckling portion, rapiers are the arm of choice. They are very ornamental, which makes them look like arms that a noble would wield, and are made of steel to create an authentic metallic sound to excite the audience. Members of the class learn how to properly hold a rapier, as well as to strike and block with the true edge. Some theatre companies are able to use the same swords for decades because the actors are trained how to properly use a sword and maintain it. After all, if a sword were to break mid-combat it could be disastrous. Techniques covered in classes include footwork, aiming for safe areas on the body, arm extensions, and breaking fights into 1-2-3 steps such as prompt-evade-slash. Using this universal fighting system, actors can use a variety of weapons, such as claymores or scythes, to match the world the production is set in. David McCormick states, “I think that everyone should have safe and effective fights in their plays and films. In terms of stage combat, I have no preference in weapons, because it should be appropriate to the particular project. I like the opportunity to be creative with the choreography

so that means a lot of the time I’m using nontraditional ways.” NOT JUST FOR ACTORS Children tend to love the idea of knights, dragons, and princesses. Academie Duello offers both summer camps and on-going classes for youth. Academie Duello offers a variety of courses, including beginner courses, specific periodbased classes such as “Taste of the Renaissance,” warrior fundamentals, and more. Equestrian people could also be attracted to the mounted combat program. Academie Duello is, additionally, one of the few places that teaches Baritsu, the Victorian martial art used by Sherlock Holmes that combines boxing, jujitsu, savate, and cane fighting. “I also teach baritsu here at the school, which is my favourite martial art; it is an effective, yet gentlemanly form of self-defence.” explains McCormick. “Many of the people who come in here are looking for fitness and a martial art that is closer to home, rather than taking on one of the Eastern martial arts such as karate. Others are interested in the competitiveness and really getting a sense of mastery over something. Rather than playing soccer, they find this a more interesting sport.” COMPETETIVE DUELING All martial arts, regardless of country of origin, fit into a tradition. Despite how efficient or perfect anyone might think their own martial art is, it exists within a historical context and culture, so no single one can said to be “better” than the other; rather, it is a case of feeling a connection to that culture and a feeling of accomplishment for your own body.

// JJ Brewis Academie Duello is interested in both the competitive effectiveness for those who want to compete, as well as maintaining the historical martial way of doing it. The studio runs its own competitions and contests, and there are a few international get-togethers that incorporate competitions. Academie Duello also hosted Vancouver International Swordplay Symposium (VISS) last year which had a large competitive component, and was complemented by workshops and guest speakers. If you are curious and want to try Academie Duello out, the best way to start is with one of the free lessons offered. If you enjoy it, a beginner’s course is eight classes long, taken twice a week over one month or once per week over 2 months. Classes run nearly every day of the week and cost $99 to start. You can also start with an Introductory Workshop for $60, or Mounted Combat Intro Workshop for $149. After that, the programs range in price from about $100 to $200 per month depending on how actively you choose to train. Academie Duello also offer discounts to students and members. The Academie has their own swords and equipment to borrow, but if you want your own mask, gorget, and gloves, prices can range from $260-$295. If you are curious to learn more, you can drop by the Academie Duello, or visit their website at www.academieduello.com. Academie Duello offers a fun and exciting chance for anyone who loves history, action movies, or fantasy to experience the thrill of armed combat. It is accessible to casual and competitive duellists, actors, and anyone looking for a good workout.

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Fill this space This Space project engages the Strathcona & Chinatown neighbourhood

By Claire McGillivray // Writer

“W

trast to the charm and integrity of local services and businesses. One is replicable, the other is an endangered species in the world of business. This directly relates to an even larger concept that affects neighbourhoods like Strathcona all over the world: gentrification. In layman's terms, gentrification occurs when an economically or socially struggling area is “revitalized” into a more upclass area. This often involves upper- or middle-class citizens moving into the area, pushing out (intentionally or not) lower-income families and small businesses. On the surface, results of gentrification might even appear positive: the neighbourhood is essentially “cleaned up.” However, the greater tragedy here that is often ignored is the increase in economic disparity and the complete loss that the poorer families and individuals face. Gentrification has been a phenomenon pushing against the cultural and social boundaries of lower-income Vancouver areas, most notably the Downtown Eastside. A lot of negativity can be easily associated with new businesses coming into poorer areas of a city, but it is perfectly apparent that gentrification is not on the agenda of Leung and Michnik. The difference here lies in community involvement. The goal is not to create a “classier” neighbourhood, but to take care of an already vibrant community by addressing specific local needs through direct communication with community members. In this manner, Leung and Michnik are taking a less direct, but more conscientious approach to business. Of course, like any sensible businessmen, profit is still on their minds, but even with respect to that they are prioritizing the community. Future online polls are to dictate which local charity the prospective business will donate a share of its net profits to.

THIS “GLOBALLY GENERIC” NEIGHBOURHOOD?

THIS SOUNDS FAMILIAR…

In response to a collection of similar comments alluding to gentrification, Leung and Michnik responded, “Try not to go too hipster/yipster on us. This neighbourhood’s losing its specific charm to globally generic nice places.” This response addresses a greater issue of what is important to Strathcona as a neighbourhood. THIS ONGOING DEBATE Economic prosperity is a positive notion for As with any contemporary pursuit, whether businesses in this area, but the costs are often it is of commercial or artistic nature, debate is greater and more complex than they appear. easily drawn upon. This Space's online forum The difficulty here is balance: the community allows for a productive and efficient place where must look at the type of successes that popular, discussion and critical thinking are both wel- corporate companies might bring, in con-

In the past few years, projects that incorporate a similar approach to direct community input and involvement have occurred in a variety of diverse locations around the world. Urban neighbourhoods in New York and a number of major Australian cities such as Melbourne, Sydney, and Perth are a handful of examples. Such neighbourhoods were pinpointed as struggling with high poverty, but possessed an “up-and-coming” quality that attracted creative thinkers much like Leung and Michnik. The Project for Empty Space was a non-profit New York initiative founded by Meenakshi Thirukode and Jasmine Wah. Their aims were

THIS IS VANCOUVER Some valuable connections can be made alongside the undeniably engaging debate sparked by Leung and Michnik’s business approach with This Space. The ultimate connection, and what a lot of their success rides on, is still the marriage between business and community involvement. This Space has immense potential to thrive off the input from its neighbours, just as there is great possibility for the Strathcona area to equally benefit from This Space. Though similar projects have occurred, there is no denying that the businessmen behind This Space have an effective grasp on how to turn heads in their own city. Vancouver has a lot to look forward to in the coming months, particularly if Leung and Michnik hit their target of a February 2012 grand opening. It all depends on the community input, and what type of business is decided upon; this includes what specific permit or renovation requirements may arise, as noted on This Space's website. Stay tuned to the future prospects of 243 Union St. by going to www.thisspace.ca where Leung and Michnik are constantly updating details on their process, including the current poll standings and updates on upcoming votes to determine each and every aspect of the business.

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e’re calling on Strathcona & Chinatown to build a sustainable business they can call their own.” Entrepreneurs Josh Leung and Michael Michnik are spearheading a curious business venture to decide on what a now-empty downtown commercial space will be put towards. Their project, This Space, involves continuous involvement from community members in Vancouver’s Strathcona neighbourhood in the form of polling. Input is gaged via a series of online polls and comment forums, asking individuals to vote on what kind of business will take over the space. Options are a restaurant, a retail space, or a local service. The first step is an intricate process. As per their webpage, “Over the coming months, a series of polls will allow people to vote on the various decisions needed to start a business in This Space. From big decisions such as ‘What type of business?’ to simpler questions like ‘What colour should the walls be?,’ the community will help us decide every aspect of This Space.” The property is an investment owned by Leung, as stated in a Vancouver Courie interview. It spans a mere 600 square feet and is located at 243 Union St., a key area of the Strathcona neighbourhood. The objectives for This Space are to operate a business that the surrounding community can be proud of, while supporting the local economy by hiring individuals living in the neighbourhood. They also hope to support local charities and projects by donating part of the profits earned by the business. The project’s core values revolve around a partnership between business and community. The relationship is meant to be mutually beneficial: the community is invited to dictate their needs, and the business prospers by providing the community with a valuable, sought after service. Although this liberal approach to commercial service goes against traditional methods, the vision behind it is clear. Despite the risk involved, the intended benefits to both the community and involved entrepreneurs are quite optimistic.

comed and encouraged. Naturally, ideas clash and disagreement ensues. Both business partners, Leung and Michnik, are active in their online forum, and are receptive to this healthy discussion. There is much debate over what genre of business is needed in the Strathcona/Chinatown area. One online commenter, listed as Chris, suggested the space be used for the creation of another Insite, similar to Vancouver's controversial safe-injection site at 47 Cordova St. To this, Leung and Michnik responded by clarifying that This Space is not a government-run or non-profit program, therefore this would not be possible. However, encouragement is given to this idea with the explanation that “there will be a vote near the end of this process asking the community what local charity, program, or facility [they] donate a portion of [their] profits to." The opportunity of support for a project like Insite remains hopeful. Another forum-contributer listed as Tanya says, “I hope this space doesn’t become another Land or Charlie and Lee (both stores for yuppies) and actually caters to the cash-strapped, artistic, social, and community minded residents by providing something to better our health all around. … Mentally and physically, we can stop the brainwashing and gentrification that is sweeping the neighbourhood.” Tanya indeed does brings up some interesting points that cannot and should not be ignored. The comedic irony here, however, is that Michnik is actually the owner of the retail boutique Charlie and Lee, as stated in his interview with the Vancouver Courier. Despite such fiery commentary, these online polls are evidently an effective and open-minded process of understanding one another; the online forum allows for those voices that wish to speak to be heard.

// Shannon Elliott to foster a strong community involvement; however, as a non-profit organization, their focus was on art, not business. Connections can also be made to the Australian formed Empty Spaces Initiatives. This project received funding from the New South Wales (NSW) government in coordination with the Arts NSW organization and the University of Technology in Sydney. The project's aim was focused on nurturing the community and increasing community involvement by collectively brainstorming ideas for creative uses for empty retail spaces. Successful initiatives involved giving space to visual artists and craftspeople as temporary or permanent galleries for emerging talent. The artistic aspects of both American and Australian projects are a clear driver in their success; however, it is difficult to measure this with any precision. The positive effects of direct community involvement with art or business have the potential to ripple through a neighbourhood, but these results are far less tangible and substantially more difficult to measure than a typical profit margin. This difficulty could be one of the many curve-balls that Leung and Michnik face in the coming months and years.

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// Graphics by the author

POWER TO THE E STUDENTS: CAP U IN NEED OF DOERS AND THINKERS Environmental sustainability on campus By Tiaré Jung // Writer

ducation is more than a conveyor belt for credits. Students do not just go into one end of a post-secondary machine, pass through a series of classes, and pop out the other end with a degree, learned and wise. Universities are communities, environments, and incubators for ideas and innovation. Establishments with so much influence face the question of environmental responsibility and sustainability. Who's answering? This is a question both asked by and posed to faculty, administration, and especially students. Across the province universities are furrowing their eyebrows and greasing their elbows to stay on top of the green movement. So what are we doing here at Capilano?

In 2009, Green Connection, a four-day event, brought together over 150 people on campus including students, faculty, and local presenters to learn about fresh water use, corporate investment in the community, and waste management. Also in 2009, Capilano first participated in “Meatless Mondays,” an easy first step for people looking to shift towards a more eco-friendly lifestyle. With 36 campus participants committed to 139 meatless meals, 1,370 lbs of CO2 and 542,100 gallons of water conserved. Inspiration from previous Capilano entries to Project Change and information for entering the challenge this year can be found at projectchange.ca, with a submission deadline of Dec. 9, 2011.

FLARES OF STUDENT INITIATIVE

SUSTIAINABILITY IN THE CLASSROOM

Since 2009, students have been forming teams for Project Change, a challenge with only three demands: first, that the outcome must affect a community of a minimum of 20 people; second, that the impacts must be specific and measurable; and third, that the results must be reported in an effective manner. How is sustainable achievement measured? There are many ways to track progress: number of participants, names on a pledge, measurable behavior changes, waste diverted, energy saved, dollars raised, meals provided, and services used, to name a few. “Bike to Cap Week” in 2010 spurred 40 people on two wheels instead of four for a week, diverting 1,053 km of automobile commuting and reducing 242 kg of CO2 emissions. In 2010, students hosted an “Eat Local-palooza” that served 180 bowls of locally sourced food from the cafeteria. The what, where, and how’s of eating locally were addressed to let students know the impacts that eating locally has on the environment, the economy, and society.

In partnership with the goBEYOND Campus Climate Network, a series of the teach-ins began in 2009 at Capilano to connect academics to sustainability, from geography, to business, to film studies. Teach-ins are in-class lessons and discussions aimed to create an understanding of the trans-disciplinary nature of sustainability and how it can be integrated into course curriculum. “Those of us in environmental circles are continually having these conversations,” comments Matt Bakker, Environmental Committee Coordinator of the CSU in 2009, “but someone not in those green networks might not talk about farmed salmon or climate change. We wanted to start those discussions, and build awareness as a foundation for action.” Teach-ins provide forums for students to share opinions and views that will be condensed and amalgamated into a document by the goBEYOND network. These documentations are made widely accessible to decision makers at all levels of government, and to advocacy groups. Essentially, the campaign is a mega-

phone for student voices to enter the provincewide discussion about sustainability. The campaign is happening again this year, with sign up in the fall semester to allow participating instructors enough time to make a lesson plan for the spring. AN ADAPTING SYSTEM The gears and cogs of Capilano are under constant renovation with the demand of sustainability to grease the clockworks. The university is required to annually report its plans and actions to reduce greenhouse gas emissions under the Greenhouse Gas Reductions Targets Act. “On the energy conservation side, we’ve had over $1 million in external funding brought to the institution for the development of a strategic energy management plan, heating & cooling, and lighting initiatives,” reports Susan Doig, Facilities Manager at Capilano University. The Sustainable Education Across the Province was a three-day conference hosted in May 2011 by Capilano that addressed three things: day one was dedicated to personal course development, institution-wide curriculum changes were discussed on day 2, and day 3 focused on Capilano’s individual action plan for sustainability. A collection of over 40 staff, administration, students, and multi-stakeholders brainstormed for an “idea jam” and came up with the some key areas to work on: “We identified and prioritized specific actions & goals for Capilano over the coming years,” Doig observes. “One of the outcomes of that conference was the waste audit and integrating course curriculum with sustainability projects.” IN THE BELLY OF THE TRASH CAN Capilano has a recycling program with 14 different streams to divert waste from the landfill. These include recycling for books, batteries,

f e atu r e s WHAT ABOUT COMPOSTING? A lot of time and effort is being put into our garbage, so how about our organics? From the 467.09 kg of waste sorted during the waste audit at Capilano, 55.98 per cent was organics. Currently, there are compost bins located in the Birch Building in the cafeteria, but they would be difficult to spot elsewhere, so it’s no surprise that a lot of organic matter can be found in the trashcans from other buildings. When organic waste decomposes in the open air of landfills, it doesn’t just disappear: it produces more carbon dioxide and methane. The compost that is collected in the Birch cafeteria is transported to a Smithrite Disposal facility where it is processed off campus. Funneling this nutrient-rich “waste” into on-site composting would go hand in hand with the idea of a community garden. “Our organics program needs work,” acknowledges Doig, “but it has a ton of opportunity to become [an] effective program.” SUSTAINABLE FOOD Growing food on at Capilano has been an idea tumbling around campus for years. In 2009, Bakker picked up the idea and gave it some sustenance: joining forces with some Business, Tourism, and Outdoor Recreation students, they looked into a business plan, contacts, relevant research on bylaws and policies, and site selection. While the proposal didn’t make it into fruition, the thread has been started: Joanne Cook, Capilano University's passionate Head Gardener, is enthusiastic to share her expertise with interested students when it comes to compost, plants, food, and soil. The resources exist, but the pieces haven’t been put together yet. A CAMPUS ECOSYSTEM Capilano’s capacity to support life goes beyond food production for humans. The North Vancouver campus is the home of two wetland areas. These ecosystems are potential wellsprings of biodiversity. “To increase biological health on campus, I suggest … assessing the wetlands for restoration, replenishing native plants, attracting pollinators, and planting for wildlife. You know we’re on the edge of the forest and wildlife – butterflies, bees, and birds – can use parts of the campus. We used to have healthy tree frog population,” observes Marja de Jon Westman, Coordinator of the Biology department. “We used to start hearing them in January. Who can hear the tree frogs now?”

Committee and goBEYOND Capilano have a brief turn-over period, with student leaders that are in office for usually only one or two years, and members come with varying commitment levels. During Bakker’s time in student government, he found that “student participation was very marginal, but at the same time there were a lot of individuals working in isolation. So the sparks are there, there are pockets of motivation, they working side by side with minimal communication.” Key groups who have carried the sustainability banner on campus in the past include the Environmental Committee of the CSU, goBEYOND Capilano, some faculty facilities, energy management, the Global Stewardship program, the Geography department, and the Outdoor Tourism and Recreation program. Unlike most post-secondary institutions, Capilano does not have a department or position dedicated solely to sustainability. The facilities manager is allocated 20 per cent of time and financial resources to sustainability. The energy management and energy specialist roles are funded by the university’s natural gas suppliers, BC Hydro and FortisBC, and focus primarily on energy savings. “I think specifically at SFU that it works because they have a large student base, but they have an independent student sustainability group. Sustainable SFU is funded by the $2 levy per student per semester,” Bakker reflects, comparing how his experience now at SFU differs from that of Capilano. “They have an executive director who is not a student, but paid to be there, and that provides continuity. The executive director is always there, can offer historic insight and direction, also able to stay with initiatives over time.”

goBEYOND Capilano and the Environmental Committee. The Environmental Committee is organized through the CSU. The committee provides an opportunity for students to get together, share and voice concerns, and provide leadership for Capilano’s sustainability projects. Of course, its efficiency depends on student turnout, what level of involvement students are willing to take, and their commitment to producing outcomes. GoBEYOND is a student movement against climate change province-wide, with connections to a greater sustainability network from campuses across BC. At Capilano, meetings are every Wednesday in the students’ lounge of the CSU, in the Maple building at noon. Some projects being undertaken by goBEYOND participants are the organic community garden, composting on site, and sustainable food workshops. GoBEYOND aspires to be more than just a workgroup, but also a hub for the various people working on sustainability matters on campus. Capilano University also has sustainability pledge in place, which breaches the first frontier of sustainability: living a conscious lifestyle. This one-page checklist serves as a personal reminder of the everyday things a person can do to save energy. It can be found on the Capilano Sustainability webpage. School projects go beyond textbooks and papers. Revamping the recycling program, on site composting, organic gardening, and revitalizing natural ecosystems are only a few examples of community based learning opportunities. With a diverse pool of students and staff, the list of more sustainable options is a constantly evolving. “Students must realize their power,” says Doig, from an administration standpoint. “Make demands! It is a responsibility to themselves and GETTING INVOLVED the community to let the institution know what Here at Capilano, there are at least two stu- they want, but also to take responsibility and acdent groups who primarily focus on working countability for how these things can happen. We towards environment and sustainability goals: need doers and thinkers!”

COMMUNITY BUILDING FOR SUSTAINABILITY “We’ve had some really amazing students drive change through their individual and group work,” explains Doig. “I see the role of students as providing enthusiasm and engagement in sustainable activities. The reason we have compostable utensils and dishes in food services is because of the personal commitment of a student whose passion was to remove styrofoam from the garbage. She got involved, made the demands, and stayed on task. The university found a way to make it happen even though it cost more money. She was able to convince the institution it was the right way and to make the change, now it’s just what we do.” There have been strong leaders in sustainability on campus, but finding records or a consistent community requires persistence and a Sherlock Holmes hat. As a commuter campus and a new university where students are usually only around for a few years, the community at Capilano University is fairly transient. Both the Environmental

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cardboard, carpets, cell phones & batteries, classroom tables, computers, fluorescent tubes, ink & toner cartridges, paper, refundable beverage containers, and hard & soft plastics. However, this system does not guarantee that students actually use it. The 2010 Beverage Container Return Study pegs single men living in urban areas between 18 and 34 – usually working outside of the home or students – as the most likely to discard a minimum of two recyclable beverage containers per week. This number could be brought down to zero if individuals were mindful of where they are placing their disposables. Capilano is casting a more scrutinous eye and a firmer hand on its waste management and recycling program. On Sept. 20, 2011, a waste audit was conducted on campus behind the Sportsplex, to see what trash cans contained. Approximately 100 students from Outdoor Tourism & Recreation and Environmental Geography, clad in white suits, gloves, masks, and goggles, wrinkled their noses and sorted over 467.09 kg of Capilano's North Vancouver campus’ throwaways. This amount sorted during the audit was only 17.76 per cent of the garbage disposal collected over ten days, of which 466 beverage containers were picked out of the garbage. Rickilee Walls, a participating student, said, “I have always tried to be aware of how I throw away things, but didn't realize the amount of people who still do not recycle or compost. It was quite shocking to me! I think yesterday was very transformational for me in the sense of wanting to educate others, [and] not only focusing on my own habits.” It took no great deductive powers to guess where some of the garbage had been collected from when plastic tampon dispensers were scattered across the sorting tables. As an alternative, the Diva Cup sells for $30 at the Capilano Student’s Union. These reusable silicone cups are easy to wash and produce no paper or plastic waste aside from the packaging they come in. Other options include washable cotton pads or natural sea sponge tampons. “Students should make sure what they use is disposed of correctly,” says Doig, “but more importantly, do they need it in the first place? Do they need this coffee in a disposable cup or can they buy a refillable mug? Three or four years ago when I would go into a class for a presentation, only one person would have their own mug; now, most people carry one.” In partnership with Encorp Pacific (Canada), the results of the waste audit will be used to develop an improved disposal system at Capilano. Students in Business Leadership are in charge of working on the business proposal for the modified waste management plan. Some of the objectives are garbage cans that don’t use 22”x20” black plastic garbage bags, clearer signage, and smaller disposal containers. The second waste audit will be conducted on Nov. 15 to assess the effectiveness of a new system. Throughout this process, students of the Environmental Geography class are working on projects to document the audit, research waste management, and share their findings. “We have to start thinking about the life cycle of what we buy,” says Cheryl Schreader, Environmental Geography instructor. “It’s time to adopt a cradle-to-cradle way of using, not a cradle-tograve way of consumption.” With the support of administration who set up the waste audit, faculty who have integrated the project into course curriculum, and student participation and interest, this project could be an example to campuses across BC – how to salvage as many products as possible for reuse, and stop things from ending up in the landfill or incinerator.

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EDIT OR // Cl aire Vul l iamy // arts @ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

Biodegradable Sequins of the Future Vancouver’s eco-fashion week shows how far there is to go

By Leanne Kriz // Writer

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“C

otton covers 2.5 per cent of the world’s cultivated land, yet uses 16 per cent of the world’s insecticides, more than any other single major crop,” says a report by the Environmental Justice Foundation in collaboration with Pesticide Action Network UK. Cotton, one of the most common and widely-used fabrics, is less known for its harsh environmental effects. Myriam Laroche, president of Vancouver’s Eco-Fashion Week explains this in a seminar during the event. Laroche works to define, as she puts it, “what’s wrong [and] what’s right in the fashion industry.” It’s not just pesticides, but overconsumption and various other environmental factors that are an issue, she explains to the audience. “I think we are ready for a big, big change.” So why aren’t consumers banging on the front door of businesses that take part in the questionable practices of the clothing industry – everyone from Wal-mart to independent boutiques – and demanding more ethical clothing? Mallory Curlee, the designer of Curlee Bikini, a completely sustainable swimwear line, explains that using the word “eco” is an aspect of her business that more frequently deters customers as opposed to drawing them in. In an era of eco-everything and constant greenwashing this might seem odd, but Curlee explains the difficulties of redefining the context of “eco” within the fashion industry to outsiders: “A lot of people assume that eco means burlap, no bright colours, or very raw, fairy-hippie-granola stuff.” In the first year of its existence she marketed

// Claire Vulliamy Curlee Bikinis as a distinctly ecologically-friendly product. After that first year, Curlee decided to redirect the marketing of her line to focus just on the swimwear. “I got more attention than with ‘eco’ attached at the beginning,” she says. Her line is made from designer leftovers and vintage textiles. In the end, the ecological aspect of her clothing line “was just sort of a bonus,” she says, but not something that shoppers are asking for. It certainly seems that the greater portion of society doesn’t understand the importance of ecofashion, or has some severe misconceptions about it. Fashion is a lucrative industry, and is so for a reason. According to the Canadian Mental Health Association, “at any given time, 70 per cent of women and 35 per cent of men are dieting” in Canada. Perhaps a society obsessed with appearance is not willing to change their habits to create a healthier planet just yet. Misty Greer, displaying her clothing line TrunkShow at Eco-Fashion Week, designs clothing that channels 1950s pinup girls with modern twist. Greer explains, “Because the aesthetic of this line is so important, I can’t sacrifice the glamour of it for outer eco fabrics … Until they are making a biodegradable sequin [for example], I’m going to have to keep buying sequins.” Misty Greer has not forgotten where she is. She confidently sits in her booth at Eco-Fashion Week, amongst her glittering, colourful clothing line and explains that she is there because she is like many local designers who represent various alternative, but very important aspects of the eco-fashion industry. These include lines such as Lrma Clothing, Adhesif and Sofia: locally-based businesses with eco-friendly practices, who aim

for well-made, durable, but also stylish clothing. In Misty’s case, this means sexy and glamorous attire as well. These designers are in the business of “slow fashion” as opposed to “fast fashion.” “Fast fashion,” in short, is a term that explains the industry of cheaply and quickly manufactured clothing. “Slow fashion,” on the other hand, is made to last beyond the first few washes, and is created with classic designs with the intention that the clothing will stay stylish longer. In other words: quality over quantity. Myriam Laroche explains that sustainable fashion doesn’t stop with what the product is made with. More local production is important, for example, because it lowers carbon emissions by not sending a t-shirt around the world before it ends up in stores. Protecting human rights in manufacturing, educating others, and having smart business practices, that includes everything from minimizing wastage of fabrics to using energy efficient light bulbs, are all important aspects of eco-fashion. Regarding materials Myriam explains that “the selection is still limited … if you are a designer, [and if] you don’t have the eco-friendly option it’s challenging.” Many designers at the event described this same problem: the lack of variety in sustainable fabrics available to them. “The challenge is that it [eco-fashion] is new,” says Laroche. “It is like the first time the cell phone was born: you were carrying it like a purse, and now we are at that place for eco-fashion, where we still need to improve.” Jujube Ecological Apparel Design is an example of a company that succeeds on more than one level. Everything in the line is ethically made, and the current line is created with a 40 per cent bamboo and 60 per cent organic cotton blend. Jujube Li, the designer of the line, personally goes down to the factory in Singapore without forewarning at least once every three months. There, she talks to the workers and the owners, and walks the floor. “It’s a little bit of extra work, but I think it goes a long way just because it gives me a peace of mind to know that everything is ethically-made on top of the fabric being environmentally-friendly, organic, and biodegradable.” Jujube, Misty Greer, and various other local designers and companies at Eco-Fashion Week all lay their business practices out on the table, and are happy to explain exactly where they lie in the evolving industry of eco-fashion. There are strict regulations for entering Eco-Fashion Week, so consumers can be assured that everything they are seeing truly is in some form ecofriendly. These forms presented themselves as everything from bicycle-wielding designers, to vintage clothing, to bigger business trying to edge their way into more eco-friendly practices. Laroche encourages everyone to “let go of all the stereotypes about ‘eco’ … and just try it.” Awareness and demand is rising slowly for eco-fashion, and people are beginning to learn of its importance from determined and passionate people like Laroche. If everyone does as Laroche says, and just tries it, consumers can look forward to the day in which they can buy a biodegradable sequined dress from Misty Greer.

Girl on Girl Ac t ion Reviewing as a competitive sport

Girls

with Sonny & the Sunsets and PAPA October 4th – Biltmore Cabaret With Jonty Davies // Ad + Events Manager

California, here we come. On October 4, Vancouver’s Biltmore Cabaret was taken over by a trio of sun-soaked SoCal groups who all shared the same congenial 50s vibe. The headlining group Girls (made exclusively of boys) has carved out a niche for themselves in confessional, old-school rock n’ roll that draws welcome comparisons to the Beach Boys and Buddy Holly. It must be said, however, that full appreciation of songwriter Christopher Owens’ words requires an understanding of his turbulent life story; he was born into the infamous Children of God cult and later struggled with heroin addiction. While the group was solid and smiling, there was little unification between band and audience. Opener Sonny & The Sunsets had a very similar approach with their retro-pop stylings. They were an enjoyable opening act, but they had little to hold them as a unique outfit. The evening’s highlight, however, was the first band: PAPA. Fronted by the drummer from Girls, PAPA alluded to the teenage tunes of yore but approached their sound with a progressive and experimental sensibility that incorporated the influence of Talking Heads and Motown. At the end of an evening of sunny California pop, the crowd emerged back into the rainy Vancouver night, several decades later. With JJ Brewis // Art director

The Biltmore was packed for San Francisco’s toast of the town, indie-popsters Girls. With flower bouquets on every microphone stand, and singer Christopher Owens outfitted in a pair of dirty white Nike high tops that contrasted his women’s black velvet top, it was clear that this was not your average rock show. With their ironic band name in tow, Girls have made their mark. Owens and band co-founder, bassist JR White, seem to have fun on stage, staring deeply and intensely into each others’ eyes during every vocal break. But the stage show, despite sounding catchy as hell, was no fun to watch as it gave off a slightly creepy vibe. Having seen the band twice before, I can safely say that their musical talents are plentiful and their songs well crafted. However it seems almost as if they’ve gotten lost trying to carve out their name in a niche indie world. Now a five-piece act in performance, Girls’ mystique has gotten a bit muddy, but their catchy tunes do get a crowd going.

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SCENES FROM THE VIFF Vancouver International Film Festival celebrates its 30th birthday; here’s a look back

Arts Short s

St. Vincent October 12 – The Commodore Ballroom

By Jonty Davies // Ad + Events manager

n recent years Vancouver has established itself as a world-city and developing cultural centre of North America. Its cultural contributions can be measured in many ways, but perhaps none are quite so telling of its international scope as the Vancouver International Film Festival. Honoring its 30th year, VIFF has earned distinction within in the international cinematic community for the vibrant cultural diversity of its programming. Featuring over 375 films from 75 countries, it is the number one showcase of East Asian cinema outside of Asia. With a primary mandate, according to the VIFF website to “encourage understanding of the world’s cultures through the art of cinema,” VIFF is establishing itself on the international level, attracting the attention of artists, press, and cinephiles the world over.

KOOKY Czech Republic Marco Ferreira // Opinions Editor

MITSUKO DELIVERS Japan Jonty Davies // Writer Four years ago director Ishii Yuya made waves with his graduation film Bare-Assed Japan. Though it failed to yield any award recognition, he acquired a reputation as an assured young director with a penchant for quirky and charming comedy. Festivals took notice, and in his native Japan he earned the pursuit of film studios, admirably declining their offers in favor of producing films by his own hand. His latest film is Mitsuko Delivers. Referred to as a “Japanese Juno,” the film follows the eccentric misadventures of an quirky young pregnant woman, Mitsuko. Mitsuko is alone and uncertain, but she is a harbinger of positivity in the lives of those around her. Through her strength of spirit and the feeling of unity she shares with all lost souls, she dedicates herself to leading her small family of emotional misfits on journey towards discovering what the heart really needs. Though Mitsuko delivers charm, it is not without its flaws. The director’s relative youth is of note, and with it comes abject technicalities that allow much of its redeeming subtleties to escape. Mitsuko’s humour can be funny, but its level of slapstick becomes overwrought. Its symbolism can be touching, but its persistence makes it obvious and unsuggestive. Though the film states itself clearly, in the world of the heart sometimes it’s the things we don’t say that have the most poignancy. THAT’S A WRAP From the slums of Angola to the alien cities of South Korea, from the trade posts of Malaysia to the sun-beaten paths of Tibet, VIFF reaches far and wide. It’s not the art-house watershed of Cannes; it’s not the indie darling of Sundance; it’s not the thinking Hollywood preview of Toronto; it’s not l’enfant terrible of Tribeca, and it is without the Euro-centrism of Venice. No, VIFF is distinctive precisely because of its own, unique breadth of source. Happy 30th, VIFF.

The Naked and Famous October 11 – The Commodore Ballroom New Zealand quintet The Naked and Famous made a definite splash with their first headlining visit this side of the pond. After gaining international raves for their debut Passive Me, Aggressive You, the band have done well at reworking their album magic into a stage performance. The sold out Vancouver crowd were on their best behaviour, eagerly awaiting each song, singing along and dancing to even the b-sides. In their encore the crowd emerged with a massive scream of approval before their song “Young Blood” had barely begun, and it’s safe to say there wasn’t a body in the house not singing along with the “yeah yeah” hook. The band seemed entirely awestruck by the crowd, constantly thanking the room, and going over their curfew by almost 15 minutes, a feat at the Commodore on a Tuesday. What makes the stylish group so interesting is that their massive rise to fame came seemingly out of nowhere. This might be explained by the fact that their smart and catchy pop tunes seem to offer something that their contemporaries are lacking. Their dance-infused brand of rock is entirely earnest, lacking the pretension that many of today’s artists display onstage. TNAF seem to believe wholeheartedly in their own work, with frontman Thom Powers constantly shaking his ass right along with his fans.

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Kooky was pretty cool. It's about this kid who is severely asthmatic and he has this little stuffed bear that comforts him. The bear, named Kooky, is dusty and unwashable, not a practical trait that an asthmatic needs in a friend. Much to the child’s dismay, the mom throws it away. The bear is given life through the child’s feverish imagining of its fate. As the bear escapes the junkyard he comes across a village of tiny creatures and develops a bond with the wise old leader. As the two embark on a journey to get Kooky home, they are pursued by a creature jealous of the leader’s position, and some security enforcers from the garbage dump who want Kooky for their own. The perspective of the child is a central theme of the film, as the character Kooky shares his voice. Beautifully animated in stop motion, the creatures interact with their world as though they DRAGONS & TIGERS are being held and moved physically by a child’s AWARD FOR YOUNG CINEMA hand. The laws of nature are also subject to a VIFF has a much-deserved reputation for show- child’s understanding. In Kooky, the portions of ing a huge variety of quality cinema from Asia. the film outside of what is imagined don't have as In fact, it has become a beacon of crossover much to say to the viewer, but in a movie that pays that presents an opportunity for the vast inde- so much tribute to childhood, it seems fitting. pendent film networks of the East to showcase KORAN BY HEART internationally. Since 1994, the conferring of the UK/USA Dragons and Tigers Award for Young Cinema Sarah Mansour // Writer has officially enhanced this aspect of the festival. As its programme explains, it is a $10, 000 prize The documentary Koran By Heart follows three offered to “a creative and innovative film, made young participants at the International Koran Reearly in the director’s career, which has not yet citing Competition held in Cairo. Two boys from won significant international recognition”. Need- Senegal and Tajikistan, and a girl from Maldives less to say, for a young director making innovative compete against 110 others, judged based on films, such a prize would be an excellent step up. their pronunciation and recitation of the Koran. On Oct. 6, the gala announcing the winner of Although none of the three competitors featured this year’s award was held at the Vogue theatre. in the film speak Arabic, they are asked to recite After Special Mention was given to Eduardo sections of the 600-page text from memory, a Roy Jr.’s Baby Factory from the Philippines and challenge even for native speakers. Nagano Yoshihiro’s Recreation from Japan, juror As the contest progresses, we get a glimpse Simon Field presented the winner: Tibetan direc- into their personal lives and how participating tor Sonthar Gyal’s debut feature The Sun-Beaten has changed them. Part underdog story, part Path. A first for a Tibetan film, Field heralded spelling bee, the documentary focuses on the the award as “bringing a powerful voice from a lighter side of Islam, removed from politics and new ethnic cinema.” Such a voice will no doubt fanaticism. Filmed right before the revolution be instrumental in elevating the cinematic sta- in Egypt, the documentary touches on the unitus of Tibet. Upon reception of the award Gyal versality of parental expectations and the role of stated that it is “not just an honor for myself, but religion in raising a child. an honor for my nation.” “My hope is that audiences will gain a sense

// Caitlyn Neufeld that Islam is a lot more nuanced and multi-faceted than is often portrayed in the news,” said director Greg Barker in an interview for Tribeca Film. With our increased exposure to Islam and government revolutions, it is refreshing to watch something that might even qualify as a feel-good movie.

St. Vincent, otherwise known as Annie Clark, literally sparkled on stage in a shimmering beaded top, which was juxtaposed against her furious guitar shredding. With droves of fan boys in the wings waiting for her to glance in their direction, Clark appeared completely at ease on stage. Unfortunately, despite a hearty catalogue and an extremely pleasant voice, Clark was crushed by the Commodore’s poor production value. The insanely loud volume throughout her set was unnecessary. An understated, intimate approach would have suited her music rather than the blow-theaudience-out-of-the-venue approach, which was sadly complemented by police-interrogation-style lighting that made watching the set impossible at points. But Clark was completely humbled by the crowd (some of whom drove twelve hours to see her), and entertained with stories in between songs. This included a tale of her friend doing interior decor for a woman who wanted everything "Just The Same But Brand New", which launched into a song of the same name. The set was highly concentrated on her newest album Strange Mercy, which allowed for Clark’s musical Jekyll and Hyde to shine well on-stage, with her high-register voice offsetting dark subject matter (“I’m a wife in watercolours, I can wash away”) and brooding arrangements.

Arts

THE CITY SPEAKS Vancouver arts community gets a nod and some cash By Katherine Alpen // Writer

repare yourself for something so shocking that you might want to put down your Timmy’s coffee for a second. Are you ready? Our city council is supporting the arts. As unlikely as it may seem, it’s the truth: on Oct. 6 at the Mayor’s Arts Awards, our very own Mayor Gregor Robertson was up on the podium supporting arts throughout the city, proving that even if support on a federal level is hard to find, the mayor’s office will still work hard to recognize those that contribute to Vancouver’s growing cultural reputation, or as Mr. Robertson called it, “the cultural capital of Canada.” There is a catch, however. Supporting is very different than funding, and all of BC, including the city of Vancouver, has a long way to go. Last year, Lindsay Brown of the organization Stop BC Arts Cuts told Rabble.ca, “BC invests about $6.50 per capita, which not only makes us last in Canada, it makes us last by a disgraceful margin.” Compared to the national average of $26 per capita, this number does seem remarkably low. In 2009, CBC news reported that BC suffered cuts of $20 million dollars, after being assured by the Liberal Government that all was business as usual for their yearly budget. Still, there have been some successful improvements. The city offers subsidized art spaces to a limited number of artists each year

for a tenancy of four years. A secondary result of the Mayor’s Arts Awards is that all honourees chosen by the city have an opportunity to give an award of $2500 to an emerging artist of their choice. The honourees themselves receive the same amount. Peanuts, it might be said, when looking at the big picture, but it is a move in the right direction. In this case, the responsibility comes down to the population of Vancouver to support its own by seeing plays, buying art, taking dance classes, and buying locally made garments. After all, we have the highest number of artists living here per capita than any other city in Canada. Listed here are just a few of the artists that were recognized this year for being, as Mr. Robertson put it, “the leaders, and the people that go above and beyond.” Barbara Cole: Public Art If you’ve seen art in public places in Vancouver, Barbara Cole has probably been somehow involved. In her acceptance speech, she mentioned that public art really isn’t about the glorification of a single person, but more so that of a group. Though she spends most of her time getting permission to exhibit her art, she is tireless in her attack of the public’s psyche. As the founder and executive director of Other Sights for Artists’ Projects, she has her hands full in an effort to “consider the aesthetic, economic, and regulatory conditions of public places and public life.” With a new generation of street art based in

graffiti on the rise, public art pieces are becom- and was inspired by the tradition of outdoor ing more expected, accepted and integral to Shakespeare productions to create a festival that public life. used Vancouver’s scenery to its advantage. He has previously been recognized for his contribuNaomi Singer: Community Engaged Art tions in multiple ways, including induction into Naomi Singer is the woman behind the annual the BC Entertainment Hall of Fame, being given Winter Solstice Lantern Festival. Bringing people the BC Community Achievement Award, and together on the darkest day of the year seems to given honourary doctorates from SFU and UBC, resonate with the community. The event has as stated in his Bard on the Beach biography. In been going on for 18 years, attracting people his acceptance of the award, he praised boldness of different cultures, nationalities and talents. in the arts and asked everyone start something: Singer gave a humble, heartfelt thanks to the city, “Whatever it is in you to begin, begin it now.” mayor, and community for supporting what she Roy Sumpter: Volunteerism has always done simply because she is good at it. Roy Sumpter started volunteering 20 years ago, Barbara Bouget: Dance and hasn’t slowed down a bit. Even at 80, he parBarbara Bouget is a force in and of her own right. ticipates in 50 organizations a year, including the To name a few of her accomplishments, she has Fringe Festival and the East Vancouver Cultural choreographed over 150 dance pieces, danced Centre’s year round events. Roy’s outlook is as folfor the Royal Winnipeg Ballet and the Paula Ross lows: “Volunteers are unpaid not because they Dance Company, and is the co-producer of the are worthless, but because they are priceless.” International Dance Festival. As she accepted Nothing could be truer when considering cash is her award she had this to say: “I don’t want to often in short supply for arts events everywhere. sound cheesy, but I’m going to. I live to dance, and I dance to live, and thank you to everyone “A city is a conversation, and art is one way who has made sacrifices to help me get where I of keeping that conversation flowing,” as Bill am.” She is currently working in the city with the Richardson, host of the events, summed it up. SFU dance program. Hopefully, this conversation will lead to more support for the arts in the future. In the meanChristopher Gaze: Theatre time, Vancouver’s public can develop their comChristopher Gaze is the artistic director and munity by participating in the arts whenever founder of the Bard on the Beach. Born in possible. If all goes well, Vancouver will never England, he moved to Vancouver in 1983, shut up.

Seven Stories in One Window Capilano’s Exit 22 theatre season debut provokes thinking By Emmalee Watts // Writer

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ake a step out onto the ledge with local Canadian playwright Morris Panych’s classic 7 Stories. This brilliantly dark comedy is an excellent kick-off to Capilano University’s Exit 22 Productions’ theatre season, opening Oct. 19. The play, directed by Dawn Moore, is the story of a well-dressed man on the top ledge of a seven-story apartment building contemplating jumping to his death. While on the ledge, he encounters his seventh floor neighbours from their windows, each completely consumed in their own situations and lives, each with their own puzzling personalities and problems. Among these neighbours, he meets a batty psychiatrist, a tightly-wound religious “miracle” worker, and many more characters of the unorthodox variety. Director Dawn Moore calls Panych a “master of dark humour,” and it’s clear to see why when watching this play. Panych is a Calgary born playwright, actor, and director. He has written numerous plays that have been performed and produced in Canada, the US, and Britain. 7 Stories, one of his earlier plays from 1989, shows us why he went on to win many distinguished awards such as the Chalmer’s Award, the Governer General’s Award and more. The initial irony of 7 Stories lies within the fact that none of the other characters seem to take any notice, or question why he is out on the ledge. Though the play and story are centered around the man on the ledge, the stories of his neigh-

bours are what seem to form the bulk of the play. Each neighbour brings forth different elements of the man’s character and puts his situation in a new light, perhaps attempting to prove that his problem is just yet another one of life’s many problems. Moore describes the play as a “bent brilliance.” “It’s about deep issues – life and death issues – ‘What’s the meaning of life?’ and ‘Is life worth living?” … And yet [Panych] approaches it through comedy and through irony,” explains Moore. It is very true; Panych’s story shines the spotlight on many issues, such as what purpose our lives serve. Questions such as these lie within all aspects of the play: portrayal of the script, the set, and the characters. On top of that, it is a rare treat to see these issues brought forward with such humour and wit. However, they are deep issues that present a challenge to portray, even for the talented actors of the cast. The cast is a mix of second- and third-year

making it clear that they understand the complexity of the minds of their personas. From being strangled, to having one last cigarette before getting married, they do it justice. The acting is well-done, genuine and strong. “There are really mature ideas in the play, so I think it’s challenging for second- and third- year students, really, to grapple with some of those issues but this cast has done a great job doing that,” says Moore. A unique trait and challenge of bringing this script to life was the set. The set is theatrical and suggestive with, literally, quite a small window for the actors to move around in. The shadowy, fragmented set appears as a representation of the nature of the play. Moore states “You’re limited in terms of the physicality of the space. It’s sort of like working within a poetry form. If you’re writing a haiku or a sonnet, you’ve got that limitation but it also is what stimulates you to be creative in other ways.” The production of the play certainly shines with creativity, using the challenge of the set to pull together a truly unique visual stimulation utilizing mainly shadows and well-choreographed movements. Overall, each aspect of the play makes the viewing experience brim with non-stop intellectual stimulation and laughs from beginning to end. The interactions and dialogue between the // JJ Brewis characters certainly leaves a lasting impression. Capilano University theatre students, some mak- Merging the story of man on the verge of commiting their stage debut with Exit 22 Productions. ting suicide with amusing ideas and antics brings Moore does an excellent job at coaxing mature a certain twisted light to such typically dark maperformances from her talented young cast; terial. 7 Stories will leave you with a grin on your they perform their complicated characters well, face with much to think about.

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ED I TO R S / / Samant ha Thompson + Sarah Vit et // e di to r@ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

STUDENTPOLITIK

The CSU has no place for me anymore

he CSU has no place for me anymore. I realize that is a strong statement; however, let me explain. As with any kind of student organization, the CSU has a very high turnover rate among its elected student executives. Myself, I served for three years as an elected representative, and then found myself burnt out, realizing that it was time to pursue other opportunities. As a whole, the experience was amazing, and the personal growth and skills that I learned were invaluable. Generally speaking, in student organizations this high turnover rate is a good thing – the executive positions are not meant to be treated as careers, they are meant to be treated as positions in which one can learn about governance, democracy, and politics, among other things. The revolving door of faces constantly brings in fresh ideas, fresh experiences, and allows the organization to remain responsive to the needs of its student membership. Simultaneously, this constantly revolving door can result in a swinging pendulum of goals, priorities, values, and overall quality of service to members. While this constant-yet-gradual shifting isn't in and of itself a bad thing, it can result in a level of instability in the organization. This is rectified somewhat by the fact that the organization has bylaws and policies that continue to govern the organization long after any particular board member has moved on (although these bylaws and policies can be changed as well). It is also rectified by long-term staff members at these organizations who bring a living institutional memory of the unwritten traditions, practices, and precedents of the organization. As much as I recognize these characteristics, my problem is that, being a member of the old guard (three years is longer than most people stay in these positions), the values I have held dear to the CSU over those years simply aren't there anymore, or are less of a priority than they were in the past. While I understand and accept that different people will bring different points of view and priorities (only one person remains from when I started), it is still difficult to avoid

this internal conflict when I attempt to participate as a student member of the CSU. This is an organization in which, as an executive, I spent three years passionately pouring my heart and soul into. I lived and breathed the organization, and the student advocacy associated with it. It is in me, like fleas on a dog, like a horse chasing the tastiest-looking dangling carrot, like a terrible infection with symptoms that include low grades, poor classroom attendance, excessive amounts of time in meetings, shouting myself hoarse in front of tons of people at rallies, and an admittedly weird obsession with Robert's Rules of Order. I still care, and I want to continue to participate as a member of the CSU. With any kind of student organization, one of the most important values that they hold is something called “membership engagement.” During my time in the CSU, this was a concept that was bandied about repeatedly; it was a concept that coloured many of the conversations that we engaged in. As a representative democracy, particularly one that has elected representatives for traditionally underrepresented groups (the Women’s Liaison, for example), how could we best represent the will of the membership? How could we allow the members themselves the greatest opportunity to represent their own views, to provide a better quality democracy? How could we remove all the roadblocks that may prevent a member from participating and having a say in the CSU’s business? The level of participation has always been lower than expected, but at least it was a philosophical point that was particularly emphasized among executive committee members. To this end, the CSU, as it is structured, is an organization that is membership-driven, from the bottom-up. Unfortunately, when it comes to membership engagement, it is often the little things that matter, and lately it seems this is where the CSU is falling short. Traditionally, items for consideration go to their respective subcommittees before reaching the executive committee. For example, a proposal for a campaign about tuition fees would go to

the Educational Issues Committee, and a proposal to buy a new game for the lounge would go to the Services committee, and then these subcommittees provide a recommendation to the executive committee on the item. In this way, all members of the CSU have the opportunity to speak and vote on issues that the CSU is working on. This used to be something that was really important, making it extremely rare that a significant item or decision would be approved at the executive level without having gone to a subcommittee first. It doesn’t seem to be as significant a concern anymore, as items get proposed to the executive committee without going to the relevant subcommittee all the time, and often get approved. A second example is in the CSU’s usage of the “Additions Folder.” This folder is a mechanism by which items can be proposed for addition to the board meeting agenda after it has already been printed and posted publicly for members to consider. Unfortunately, even major changes to bylaws have been proposed through this mechanism, not allowing anyone, even other board members, to have the opportunity to consider the item beforehand. That this doesn’t make anyone uncomfortable is certainly eyebrow raising. In addition, a lack of clear and strictly enforced guidelines on what items board members may discuss in-camera has resulted in items being discussed in private that should not be. Generally, in-camera is limited to matters of land, labour, and legal, but without any strict policies the executive doesn't have to follow this. Logically, sometimes this is necessary to deal with sensitive issues, but my experience as a board member also showed me that it was often merely an opportunity to talk behind the back of whoever wasn’t at that meeting that day, among other things that had no need to be in-camera, or need to be discussed at all (like gossip). Lately, there has also been a lack of discussion in committees, because it appears that the executives have already discussed and decided beforehand what motions they wanted to bring forward, and how these motions would be passed.

With Gurpreet Kambo // Columnist

Unfortunately this excludes members being able to participate in the discussion when the decision is being made, and as a result the CSU feels similar to an exclusive club as opposed to a bottom-up organization. In fact, the current chairperson of the executive has, on two separate occasions, tried to restrict the speaking rights of non-executive members without any direction from the board. The action resulted in the executive approving a motion to officially give members speaking rights at executive meetings. Logic has it that a member of the CSU may have as much to say on an item, that may sway someone’s vote, as any elected executive. All of this is not to discount the point that the CSU board members are, by and large, hardworking individuals who should be commended for much of the work that they have done. However, it is clear that there has been a major cultural shift in the CSU, which seemed to begin while I was still a board member last year. Every year, many of the candidates that run in CSU elections speak about how “no one on-campus knows/cares about the CSU” and that they will work to address that. Let’s hope they follow through, firstly by affecting another culture shift to where concerns of the membership are sought out and encouraged above the interests of even the elected representatives themselves. That would be a true democracy, where there really is space and accessibility for members to be at the table and participate in the discussions. As for myself, I shall continue to participate as much as possible, if only to make it clear where the roadblocks lie that prevent students from participating. Because believe it or not, there are still some students that care. Gurpreet Kambo has been involved in student politics for the last three years. Having made the switch to student journalism, he will now dazzle us with the highest level of student politics' knowledge known to man. He also is something of a pizza connoisseur and can tell you where the best pizza by the slice place is in every city in the Lower Mainland.

Rain, records, and recreation

Fuck me harder, Kurt Cobain 80s (such as John Maus’ incredible impressions of Joy Division’s album Closer), music culture has noticeably leapt forward a good ten years into 90s revival. Time for everyone to bust out the plaid workshirts, combat boots, and long, greasy hair! The 90s were a great time for music and culture: everyone was pissed off, girl was spelt grrl, and the music was loud, distorted, and abrasive. The signs of the current grunge revival are everywhere. Spend a weekend at any Vancouver dive bar (Pats Pub, Funky Winkerbeans, etc.) and it’s easy to see: Nu Sensae, Heavy Chains, and The Defektors are just a few of the loud, angry bands playing shows around the city, yelling in your face and cranking the distortion level up to 11. They spit on the soft-rock ideals of 80s revival while drinking all the PBR. “On Sept. 24 1991, Nirvana released Nevermind, an album that not only changed music,

// Columnist

but altered the culture in ways that still resonate today,” writes Marc Hogan for Spin magazine’s August issue, which was completely dedicated to Nevermind. The 20-year anniversary of this quintessential grunge album has both music nerds and superfans getting riled up with 90s fever. Nirvana’s popularity certainly never faded, but this 20-year benchmark will no doubt expose Nevermind to an even larger, younger audience. Major record labels in the early 90s began to realize the immense potential of underground scenes, as opposed to mainstream pop music. “Nirvana arguably knocked that door down, and then old geezers like me coat-tailed,” says Henry Rollins of Black Flag, in an interview for the above Spin article. Many bands of this period still exist, which makes this particular revival a bit confusing. One

must ask themselves: “Did grunge ever really leave?” The answer is, probably not. Bands like Pearl Jam and Alice in Chains never really went away, but the popularity of grunge definitely declined with the creation of pop-punk and, later, modern indie rock. It was then rehashed rather horribly in the early 2000s by bands such as Nickleback and Theory of a Deadman. On top of that are the reunions of Pavement, Guided By Voices, and The Pixies, all 90s favourites. It’s clear that grunge is back and ready to moan. Colin is a music journalist who is, put simply, Tom Wolfe without all the acid. His favourite movies include Uncle Buck, The Room, and Dick Tracey. After spending a summer in an isolated mountain valley he feels like getting back in touch with reality through writing.

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t’s often been said that trends move in 20year cycles. In our fast-paced modern society, however, these trends come and go much more quickly. Recently usurping 80s throwback bands in Vancouver is the revival of Grunge, which is seeing the local music scene getting a lot more distorted, angry, and all-around dirty. Do you remember the 80s? Me neither! But that didn’t stop countless bands from recently picking up synthesizers, despite the fact that they couldn’t have been out of diapers when New Wave and synthpop were current. Vancouver band Destroyer recently released the critically acclaimed album Kaput, which was very much a throwback to the “tight ‘n’ bright” era. Truly, nothing captures the essence of 80s music better than the faint echo of a saxophone being played on a distant mountaintop, which Kaput is awash in. Though there are still musicians celebrating the

With Colin Spensley

Columns World of Violence

The implications of peaceful protest

arlier this year, the US Department of Commerce reported that US businesses are more profitable than they ever have been before, because corporate profits are up by nearly half from the “end of the recession” in June 2009. But beyond Wall Street, this cheery figure is meaningless for the everyday American. The US economy remarkably brought production back up to pre-recession levels without hiring any more workers, leaving the unemployment rate above 9 per cent, while, for those with jobs, the average worker’s salary, accounting for inflation, dropped by nearly 2 per cent. In other words, these economic gains were at the expense of the working class. Thankfully, there are a multitude of Americans no longer tolerating this: the Occupy Wall Street (OWS) movement converged on Sept. 17, taking Zucotti Park (formerly known as Liberty Plaza, until it was renamed after the chairman of the company that owned the space – perhaps a symbol for America’s departure from its founding values) in New York. In this liberated space, echoing the occupations in Athens and Barcelona, demonstrators enacted participatory democracy in the form of a general assembly, along with operating many communal services. Since this initial occupation, similar demonstrations have erupted throughout North America. Like many other movements in the past, OWS is leaderless, a “horizontally organized resistance movement” (according to OWS’ unofficial website), allowing for a diversity of views and tactics to be practiced. Despite this diversity, there does appear to be a common agreement on labelling the movement as “nonviolent.” When both the demonstrators and the media use this term, it is typically meant to signify that the movement’s participants are not

participating to destroy private property or provoke altercations with the police or other citizens. But to keep it in context, as philosopher Slavoj Žižek told the OWS demonstrators in New York recently, in “the 2008 financial crash, more hard earned private property was destroyed” than what any destructive protest is capable of. Designating the movement as non-violent renders the movement to be more palatable for the general public, and as the movement insists on representing the “99%”, perhaps this language of nonviolence is even necessary. Conversely, this aim for palatability will neuter the movement’s potential. When demonstrators declare they will not disrupt traffic in the name of non-violence (as some have done), they are committing to keep their protest separate from society, and leave the economy relatively undisrupted as well. Even more so, this language overlooks the inherent violence of the OWS movement. The occupation of a space belonging to others (in the case of New York, Brookfield Office Properties) is, by definition, a violent act. The demonstrators have stripped the “rightful” owners of the park of their authority as owners by the movement’s mere presence; their de facto authority. Brookfield, for example, has a list of regulations for the park’s usage – such as a ban on sleeping bags, tarps, and laying down on either benches or walkways – that are not being followed, yet the demonstration continues. Although these violations of the “basic yet necessary requirements” upset them, as a Brookfield spokesperson told the press, the scale of the protests (and a murky legal space regarding whether the state can even enforce these rules) has prevented them from acting on it.

As the foundation of the OWS movement lies within this idea of occupying a space (i.e. appropriating property with political objectives), OWS is in fact violence shrouded in a language of non-violence. But what happens when a liberated square is not defended? Look no further than the unfortunate end of Occupy San Francisco, a group forged in solidarity with OWS. After holding an area right outside the Federal Reserve building in the financial district for a week, police officers raided the encampment in the middle of the night on Oct. 6 for breaking several city laws, including creating a public nuisance and serving food without a permit. Despite creative attempts at defending their space, the demonstrators’ tents and belongings were removed, and they were forced out. Sadly, the local movement now finds themselves in a quagmire, as the group has struggled to find an alternative protest space. Their proclaimed nonviolence prevented them from truly defending their political activity. And if this continues in other occupations, these spaces will exist only insofar as the state allows them to. Passivity will embolden governments to persecute the demonstrators for infringements of measly bylaws, hushing the movement’s actual objectives from the public. In addition to the city of San Francisco’s re-appropriation of the demonstrator’s space, governments elsewhere have employed various forms of violence to curtail the OWS movement. New York has gone the furthest so far, spending over $2 million on overtime costs for the NYPD, and erecting a steel barricade around Wall Street, only granting access to those in business attire, other workers, and residents. The symbolic centre of capitalism – and the actual financial

With Dexter Fergie // Columnist

capital of the world – is now physically surrounded by a fence that is guarded by the NYPD. The consequences of crossing this barricade have been made clear: demonstrators will be met – and were met not too long ago – with mace and police batons. These responses demonstrate that the economic system requires the protection of the state to continue normal operations. With a violent economic system hiding behind the state violence, the demonstrators stare violence in the face. Speaking to CNBC recently, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney expressed his fears: “I think it’s dangerous, this class warfare.” And in response, many on the Left – and many more liberals – made attempts to refute Romney’s claim. In doing so, the Left exposed their cowardice. Romney is right: this is class warfare. When the upper 20 per cent control 85 per cent of the country’s wealth, along with their democracy, this is class warfare waged by the economic system on everyday Americans. The OWS movement is simply the assertion of these everyday Americans. As Žižek said, “They tell you we are dreamers. The true dreamers are those who think things can go on indefinitely the way they are. We are not dreamers. We are awakening from a dream, which is turning into a nightmare. We are not destroying anything. We are only witnessing how the system is destroying itself.” Dexter Fergie is a previous Cap student, now studying at UBC. His insights into current events and politics have been gracing the pages of the Courier for two years. In his column this term he is exploring the various forms that violence takes within our world.

Sex with cheetah

Long live the Queef

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queef a lot. Like, pretty much constantly during sex. I’ve tried every position, more lube, less lube, everything! Nothing works. My boyfriend is really understanding, but it’s so embarrassing! Do you have any advice? It makes sex so awkward that I don’t even want to do it. —Flrrpppt

God, how horrible for you. There’s nothing more distracting during a deep, soul-penetrating, eyegazing, missionary-position-only sack sesh with your lover than a nice juicy queef. Girl, get over it! Everyone queefs. Queefs are your vagina’s way of telling you to loosen the fuck up. Although that’s an awkward way to put it, queefs are totally natural and they can really bring the LOL in bed, because there is nothing funnier than a fart noise. Actually, the thought of you two going at it as a symphony of pussy farts erupts over the gentle bed-squeaking silence is bringing me to the point of LOL right now. But I digress. In all seriousness, there’s really nothing much you can do about this particular issue other than what you’ve already tried. To offer you some consolation, frequent queefing is pretty minorleague in the vast galaxy of vaginal issues that are available. Just treat it the way you would a big zit or a cowlick. Option a) Try to avoid fucking in utter silence.

Put some tunes on. Like, loud tunes. LOUDER. If the neighbors complain, tell them right to their faces that it’s better than hearing you guys shag. Now I’m going to catch flak for it in the office, but I suggest R. Kelly. He based his whole career around making music to fuck to, so you’d better start with the master. I don’t see nothing wrooong with a little bump ‘n’ griiiiind! (Ooohhooo-woaaaah! Oh!) Option b) Girlfriend, you need to make queefing your main attraction. This is your ticket to sexual hall of fame! Just think about it. Out of all the people you’ve ever slept with, which ones can you remember? Sorry, which ones stood out from the crowd? The answer is (ok, after the ones who you actually liked), the people who had some freaky shit going on! The guy with the fuckedup ball configuration, the one who wanted to role-play your parents, the lady who lactated. Guess what? Now you’re one of them. The one people will tell all their friends about after bedding you. Your nickname is probably Queef Girl. This isn’t anything to be ashamed of! You’re fucking infamous! People are going to remember your vagina for the rest of their lives. You should probably even give all your future sex partners a hilarious little caveat before getting into bed. Just like a preview before the movie! “Hey, just so you know … I am the fucking Empress of

With Cheetah Powers // Columnist

Queefs. They use my vagina as a stand-in for the special effects on The Terrance and Philip Show.” Funny and sexy! Boys love that shit. Let’s use a real-life example to illustrate this phenomenon: My friend Treashawn once dated a man from Holland named Stein who was extremely quiet and reserved. His English was less than stellar, so I expect he felt pretty shy around our group of friends. One weekend, we all took a trip up to a cabin on the Sunshine Coast, and the first night there we ended up getting blackout drunk. I was just waking up Saturday morning to a peaceful day of being hungover when the silence was shattered by a deafening, guttural moan from the next room: “YOUR PUSSY FEEL SO GOOD YEAAAAAAAARRRRGHHHHUUUUH.” For a second I assumed that my worst cabin-related fear had come true: a psychotic hick had broken into the house and was going to rape and murder us all, one by one. Then I recognized Stein’s distinctive tenor. “UHHH. DO MY COCK FEEL GOOD BABY. OH YAH BABY. UNNGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH. ” This went on for about 15 minutes, during which everyone in the house pretty much died laughing. The best thing is that it turned out he had absolutely no control over his … pleasure yodeling … as it was an entirely involuntary reflex. Treashawn

sheepishly confessed that most of the time, he had absolutely no idea he was even doing it. “The first time we had sex, I started screaming myself,” she said, “Because I was in complete shock. Now I kind of tune it out. At least I know he’s enjoying himself.” Alas, Screamin’ Stein – as he is now known – took his show back to Holland, where I assume he continues to frighten the shit out of women. But he’s a legend back here. I mean, we still talk about him and his awesome screaming all the time! Not a single party, ladies’ night, or hangover brunch goes by without a Stein impression. Like I said, he’s a legend. Some people moan. Some people scream. Some people want to talk about their feelings while spanking the shit out of you in an executioner’s mask. You queef, and that’s totally cool. Besides, it could be way worse: you could have a problem with sharts*. Cheetah has worked on the graphics end of the Courier for nearly four years, but this is her first ever column. She will answer all your burning, itching, scabby sex questions, via text at 778-8596036 or by emailing cheetahpowers@gmail.com. *A shit-fart. Even if you’re into poo, it’s still not sexy.

Opi n i o n s

Edi tor // Marco Ferreira // o pi ni o ns @ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

Fighting the war alone Not enough help for veterans suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder By Katherine Alpen // Writer

bout the time most Canadians will be sitting down to their Christmas dinners this year, the majority of Canadian troops, specifically those based in Kandahar, will have been withdrawn from active service in Afghanistan. Facing these soldiers is the world of civilian life, though some may be sent on other tours throughout the world as enlisted men and women. Of those coming home, though, some bring an unseen weight on their shoulders: there was no name for it in 1918 or 1945, but these days, it’s known as Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). PTSD is an anxiety disorder that can affect anyone who has suffered a traumatic event which has threatened injury or death to themselves or someone near to them. PTSD isn’t limited to soldiers. Ask anyone who was in New York during 9/11, or civilian witnesses of war crimes. Rape, abuse, and violent crime victims all share the same (though varying in intensity and situation) traumatic aftermath. Symptoms of PTSD include, but aren’t limited to, flashback episodes of traumatic events, emotional numbing, difficulty concentrating, avoidance, agitation, and outbursts of anger. As of late, PTSD has been getting more media attention, influenced by a younger, more vocal generation returning home. Currently, there is no program outside the military offering aid to those soldiers suffering from the disorder. Soldiers are often gun-shy when it comes to

away, it could be judged as attempting to avoid service. This stigma makes it difficult to find willing test subjects for studies intending to advance therapeutic practices. Mental health programs have an especially difficult time guiding older veterans to the services now available, as they are less likely to seek help. The most challenging reality facing doctors treating patients with PTSD is that treatment is never standard. A new therapy technique that has been put through a controlled study is virtual reality treatment (VRT). In VRT, test subjects undergo therapy based on reliving environments that caused them trauma and working through them with logic and reason, as opposed to reacting in anger and frustration. With test subjects returning from Iraq and Afghanistan, VRT did well versus treatment as normal (TAN), with a 30 per cent improvement in 70 per cent of participants. However, the study didn’t confirm that each and every person would have more success with VRT, whereas in the TAN study there was improvement with 50 per cent of patients. It is a matter of discerning the specific challenges facing each patient and then deciding which therapies are best for that patient alone; a time-consuming challenge for any health care practitioner. Once a soldier has retired, he or she is basically on their own when it comes to treating any disorder. According to a report by Veterans Affairs // Katie So Canada in 2000, 28 per cent of soldiers report showing or admitting they have PTSD because symptoms of severe depression. The process for of the negative stigma it carries. Though a soldier finding help is both very time-consuming and might seek help to make it through a lengthy trip complicated. For this reason, Canada needs to

have a program separate from the military that can address this demographic of suffering soldiers. The Canadian Military has occasionally compensated soldiers suffering from PTSD with a lump sum, but realistically, this kind of practice hides the problem without offering any kind of long-term solution. In the last ten years, the Canadian Military has made advances in the pre-deployment training programs and post-deployment assessments of soldiers. As well as offering treatment options, they have also been said to be working hard to destroy the stigma of PTSD for soldiers. A new position in the military specifically developed for soldiers suffering is that of a Social Work Officer. It's the job of the Social Work Officer to evaluate soldiers with their families, and give them a post-assessment after service making sure there are no mental stresses that require treatment. In a recruitment video on Forces.ca, Social Work Officer Mercy Yeboah-Ampadu stated, “People aren’t looking to get out of a tour, they’re looking at ways to help them use their strength to get through it.” However, these workers aren’t required to have combat training or experience in the field, so there is a gap of understanding that could impede some soldiers in relating to the help they are receiving. As you read this newspaper, there are many PTSD afflicted soldiers on their way home. Even though the military has improved their support systems for these individuals, without a comprehensive program outside the military, many of these men and women will be on their own.

Who Doesn’t Want a Day Off? Christy Clark instates Family Day in BC. By Katie Shore // writer

to have similar sentiments. This cheesy new day of celebration provides them with no downfalls at the current time. Why shouldn't they support Clark and Family Day? However, there are some people who have stronger opinions opposing Family Day. “Frankly, I'm a bit offended that she wants to create a new holiday that promotes families. I find it demeaning to those of us who aren't a part of the nuclear family that she is trying to promote,” says Sarah Sadeghieh, a current BCIT student. “While I think that family issues are important, I don't think that supporting families more than people in other kinds of living situations should be brought into politics.” Family Day will also cost small businesses. One source reports each small business will lose over $1000 in revenue due to the inauguration of a new holiday. While this may seem like cheap change to a bigger business, it can damage a small business greatly. “That doesn’t factor in the cost of lost sales or the business owner’s own labour costs; for instance, are they even paying themselves that day?” Shachi Kurl, CFIB director of provincial affairs told the Vancouver Sun. “Bottom line – Family Day will be hard on family businesses.” Perhaps Clark’s motives aren’t so terrible after all. Family Day isn't anything new to Canada: first recognized in Alberta in 1990, Family Day

// Stefan Tosheff has spread to both Saskatchewan and Ontario. Prince Edward Island and Manitoba celebrate holidays on the same day, called Islanders Day and Louis Riel Day respectively. In this, it could be suggested that Clark is simply trying to fit in with other parts of Canada and increase British Columbians' sense of national identity. With her chipper attitude and bias toward families, Christy Clark has managed to leave a sour taste in the mouths of many British Columbians. It is possible that this Family Day is a political move to make herself seem re-electable. In any case, Clark's proclamation of a new holiday has resulted in a resounding “meh.” Nobody will say no to a day off work, but Family Day seems to be a title for a day that should be able to be “celebrated” properly by any British Columbian.

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or some British Columbians, it seems like we can’t get a break when it comes to our premiers: Gordon Campbell still brings to mind the infamous drunk driving mug shot taken in Hawaii, and the taste of the hated HST is lingering. Now, we have Christy Clark, who is trying to be the “family premier.” However, she is also trying to have the playoff riot trials televised, and has postponed the provincial elections, arguably to her advantage. She appears to be proving herself to be, however family-oriented, just another politician. Part of Clark's original platform when she was running for premier was to instate Family Day, a new statutory holiday which would fall in late February of every year. Spearheading the “Families First Initiative,” a program which focuses on family values and programs that benefit parents and children alike, the first Family Day will take place in February of 2013. The new holiday precedes the next provincial election date in May 2013 by just a few months, suggesting that it is a shrewd political move and not just a break for British Columbians. Clark claims that Family Day will put families first, and also provide a much needed winter break for British Columbians. Additionally, she

believes that it may boost tourism … somehow. It goes without saying that Clark wants Family Day because it makes her look good. Who wouldn't want to elect someone who gives them a day off school or work for essentially lounging around the house with your family? However, we don't need a new statutory holiday. Excluding Boxing Day, most of the holidays serve some sort of celebratory purpose, and are already traditionally spent with family. While families may take advantage of Family Day for bonding purposes, the majority who are past the point of living with family and those who may live far away from nearest and dearest are left with a day that could be spent more productively. Clark’s campaign was rich with stories of her close connections with her parents and how she defines herself as the typical “soccer mom” with political aspirations. However, according to Statcan, the census family that she describes, complete with parents and children, makes up only around 69 per cent of people in British Columbia. That’s 31 per cent of people who aren’t our premier’s first priority. “I don't mind the prospect of a new statutory holiday. I don't have to go to school and I get paid more if I choose to go to work,” says Capilano University student Mack McCorkindale. “However, at the end of the day, it seems a bit pointless.” The majority of students questioned seemed

opinions

Small Campus Suffrage Sechelt and Squamish can vote now, that's cool By Evelyn Cranston // staff Writer

tudent politics are often about big drama, big power, and relatively low stakes, making them exciting to follow and participate in. In the 2011 Capilano Students' Union (CSU) elections, the decision was made to include Sechelt and Squamish campuses in the voting processes. The seemingly minor inclusivity of these schools echoes larger issues in Canadian politics. With the inception of voting, only white, rich men could participate. Aboriginals, women, immigrants, and other marginalized groups have all taken on public battles throughout history to win the vote. A fundamental element of living in a democracy is this highly sought-after freedom. While the realities of politics are dirty, with a choice of criminals to choose from and an unequal distribution of seats to votes, the idea of a free and open election is pure democracy. Until 1960, Canadian First Nations were not permitted to vote unless they gave up their treaty rights. In October 2002, The Supreme Court of Canada ruled that Canadian citizens serving prison time have the right to vote in federal elections. There’s been debate over lowering the voting age, and concerns have arisen about how best to accommodate international students and post-secondary students attending school in other provinces for provincial elections. Homeless citizens are welcome to vote, but must somehow fulfil the criteria of proving identity and residence. Marginalized groups face adversity when seeking suffrage, and in the context of Capilano University elections, Sechelt and Squamish were the overlooked and underrepresented. Because the students at the satellite campuses don’t pay fees and previously weren’t granted an opportunity to vote, there was a tendency for the CSU to ignore their issues. Nolan Remedios,

newly elected Educational Issues Co-ordinator, stated, “The purpose of doing it [granting Sechelt and Squamish voting opportunities] is to reduce the amount of disenfranchisement that the campuses feel. They’re so disconnected, obviously for geographic reasons, but even through administration. The student union has not really represented them out there.” Remedios made an important point concerning the CSU’s relations to these smaller, more remote campuses. He believes the new voting inclusiveness “demonstrates an understanding on the part of the CSU that decisions that are made and policies that are created in the Maple building of the North Vancouver campus actually do have an effect on students in Sechelt and Squamish.” He makes a valid connection by pointing out that while these students do not pay fees, they’re often affected by decisions made without their input. In previous years, there was an altered interpretation of a bylaw that defines voting eligibility. Sechelt and Squamish students do not pay student fees to the CSU, but it was not clear whether non-paying meant non-voting as well. On the CSU website, it states, “All members of the Student Union are eligible to vote. Members are all students paying Student Union fees.” However, David Clarkson, Electoral Committee Chair, states, “Nowhere else does the policy or bylaws pertaining to memberships or the elections does it say ‘North Vancouver students are voting members’ or ‘Squamish students are non-voting members.’ Our bylaws are totally silent in that way.” As far as Clarkson can tell, satellite campus students could vote if they drove out to North Vancouver, but it was inconvenient and rarely done. This year, the CSU had an extra $2000 to spend on the elections, due to increased enrolment causing an influx of student fees. With this money, the CSU organized for each of the two campuses to have a four hour, on-campus voting

period for every eligible student. Again, as stated on the website, all members of the CSU are eligible to vote. In bylaw two, it states, “The members of the Union shall be: all paying and non-paying Capilano University students except university employees who have their tuition waived.” Obviously, there had been some misinterpretation in the past. Sechelt and Squamish students, save for the attendees who have waived tuition, should have the opportunity to vote. The CSU was wise to revisit their misinterpreted bylaws to allow voting opportunities to

// Alexandra Gordeyeva satellite campuses, and time will tell if the newly elected positions will be adequate in serving the specific needs of Sechelt and Squamish students. Denying eligible voters from Sechelt and Squamish campuses an opportunity to cast their vote for someone who will best deal with their campus-specific issues may have less serious ramifications, but is an insult to a fair voting system regardless. Shutting out any Canadians or Capilano students from participating in a “free and fair” election process taints the ideals of a democratic process.

gram. If there is a regulation imposed on saturated fats, and not on alcohol or foods with high sugar counts, it will cause wallets to shrink but waistlines to stay the same size. “As a doctor specializing in weight problems, my first concern is that fat, saturated or not, is fat,” says Dr. Ian Campbell, medical director at the obesity charity Weight Concern in an interview with the Mirror. “Saturated fat is less healthy than unsaturated fat, but it's no less calorific. And why should a 100 g chocolate bar with 8.8 per cent unsaturated fat be taxed less than a 100 g bar with 2.2 per cent saturated fat?” He is also concerned about the amount of sugar and salt in the food, “but a fat tax won’t do anything to reduce that,” he concludes. With the highest obesity in Europe, the British government has been warning it could become a national epidemic. “Obesity could be as big a crisis as climate change unless the nation starts to lose weight soon,” Labour health secretary Alan Johnson warned in 2007. In an interview with 5 News, Prime Minister David Cameron stated, “Do we have a problem with the growing level of obesity? Yes. Do we have

a kind of warning in terms of – look at America, how bad things have got there – what happens if we don’t do anything?” The UK government says that they will use the money gained from the tax to fund programs to teach the public on healthy choices and lifestyles. Nearly 25 per cent of the adult population in the UK is obese. This is the highest rate in Europe, and is more than twice the rate in Denmark, which has the lowest obesity rate in the EU. Critics of the tax don’t believe that this initiative will lower obesity levels, and argue that creating policies to make healthy living an easier option for those at risk would be a more effective change. Ideas include reducing the tax rate on healthy foods to make them more affordable, and giving tax benefits for gym memberships. It is undeniable that there is a growing obesity problem. A new survey showed that 1.7 billion adults in the world are now obese. However a tax on saturated-fat heavy foods will not fulfill its intention. Without proper knowledge on healthy food and lifestyles, the tax will cost the public more, and make local farmers pay more to produce the same foods as foreign farmers.

The Fat Tax

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 6

UK cash grab won't reduce intended flab

fat tax places a surcharge on foods that contain more than 2.3% saturated fat. This tax is intended to target foods rich in fat like cheese, butter, milk, oils, meats, and highly processed foods. The Danish tax adds about 16 kroner to every pound of saturated fat. If the UK follows this guideline, it will add approximately £2 for every 2.2 lbs of saturated fat in the food. The new tax has been criticized for being economically unfriendly, as imported foods are taxed on the saturated fats they contain and domestic foods are taxed twice: first for how much fat is in the product, and secondly for how much saturated fat is used in the preparation. This doesn’t help the local economy, or promote environmentally // Sarah Taylor friendly eating habits. There is also little research to support that a By Leah Scheitel diet low in saturated fats will actually reduce // writer someone’s weight. The public might reduce ant to save some money? Then don’t their intake of dairy, but without education and buy the cheese. encouragement they may replace it with empty This may soon be the case in the calories, such as soda and other foods high in United Kingdom, where the government is de- sugar. This tax also misses out on alcohol: while bating whether or not to follow the model of the fat contains nine calories per gram, alcohol has Danish Fat Tax that was imposed last week. The the next highest count with seven calories per

Caboose F e a t u r ed F i c t i o n

It Begins In an Airport

By Tembra-Lynn Blair // Writer

Edi tor // KEvin Murray // c abo o s e . c apc o uri e r@ gmai l . c o m

I tugged her towards me, pulling her in close as she giggled, blonde hair tumbling over blue eyes. She swept it back as she stopped, resting against my side. I slipped my hand into the small of her back, caressing it, and then held her, blinking as I met her eyes. She ran her fingers up my arm and tilted her head forward doing that thing where it looked like she was about to say something, then the corner of her mouth turned up, and she had that expression she gets where it seemed as though she was going to cry or burst out laughing and was trying to contain herself from doing either. Then, “I

love you, you know.” I held her gaze, looking into her eyes, and raised my eyebrows, saying, “You too.” A passerby stopped, and I blushed. Her hand touched my cheek softly and our lips met. I grasped her sweatshirt, breathing in, closing my eyes, then rested my chin on her shoulder as she wrapped her arms around me and I put my face into her hair, her cheek against my ear, strawberry shampoo mingling with my Nina Ricci perfume. I want – That was chemistry right? – now – My pen paused – So – foot tapping, hand squeezing – beautiful – Should I – Dizzy feeling – make it more – Breathe! I sucked air – erotic? No, samplers only, or else, let me into the program Berkeley! – Body tense, rigid – There’s a lot more where that came from! – like in preparation for – What would she really look like? – Normal – I could feel her now, touching me, lovingly, passionately, gently – her body on mine – she’d care about me – embracing – Read in-between the lines, my eyes – running her fingers through my hair – in the rain – cuddling – and want me. Romantic – Wrap her arms around my waist – wouldn’t let go – touch her – coddling – her body telling me – she’d listen – her voice so – wouldn’t judge me – tingling now – not disgusting, fucked-up pig – whatever I had to – or weird – say. It wouldn’t be awkward, it would just happen. It would be perfect, like Naomi and Emily in or Spencer and Ashley in . Maybe she’d be an actress, super down to earth, not like that stupid – that’s why, I was crying. I’d never get tired of spending – so – time – empty – with her. Not mundane – Always, when I needed her – nothing gross. We’d – Hours together, safe, free – a drop. Thirsty. A sip of water, another, rearrange pencils, too much. Stretch. Keep it moving. C’mon, don’t freeze. You can do this. It’ll all happen when – don’t think – much – about that! – pressure! Sorry. Okay. Focus. Bring on Berkeley. Get back into the mindset. This whole thing about dreams … the residences would be SO much fun! Not like: “You’re going to have an awfully hard time making friends you know. You can’t just leave your dishes in the sink there.” I won’t, I’ll … “It’ll be a wakeup call all right. They’ll hate you. You’re disgusting, Allison. And everyone else knows how to …” I do, I just forget; – “Lazy. Don’t tell them – If they knew – I wouldn’t …” Shut up. Shut up! Instant friends, always someone to do something with … Shopping together, the common rooms, sharing clothes … then by

the time – I’d have these best – so close – Ah … it’d be very … Yes, exactly like that. Run their fingers through my hair like you would a – could touch – braiding. We’d – and I’d be the product of a girl who went to sleepovers as a kid – like camp – not sexual – trust – could drink again and would – not self-conscious – anxious – nervous – talking. They’d hold me if I needed to cry – know me – slap – it wouldn’t get in the way – me, playfully when we were joking around – ask about my day – know when I was lying – call. On campus I’d play Frisbee in-between classes on the lawn. I’d go for a run in swag I’d bought from the bookstore, sprinting down University Boulevard. Yeah, I’d totally have to buy a sweatshirt on the first day, and hang one of those pennants in my dorm room: Berkeley represent! I’d put a string of lights up like Ashley Tisdale as Savannah does in too! Oh, and my roomies, we’d have movie nights, it’d be okay if they – and sneak into the swimming pool – laughing – like that trailer for – so exciting! Okay, okay focus. The sliding glass doors opened with our second load of luggage and I waved goodbye to the Palm Trees of Palm Springs … Always show gratitude. Umm … … thankful for the experience, ready for the ruins of Rome, as we were hit with a gush of cold air, already blasting in preparation for the crayon meltable sun.

// Lydia Fu

// Celina Kurz

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 6

Sexy Comics

love airports. Not in a, I-think-they’re-nice sort of way, but the full out, plane-take-offsleave-me-breathless-and-check-in-makesme-giddy. I love the array of international magazines, and bringing light reading material, like that book I’ve been meaning to start for a while now but just haven’t quite gotten the chance to. It’s the thought of seeing the city I’m landing in from above, splurging on duty-free gum that may or may not actually be cheaper, and exploring all those special parts in terminals that nobody else can see without a ticket. The shops have everything, the candy is better, and the energetic hustle – view of the – and bustle – tarmac – boarding call – exhilarating! It’s here, at the airport, taking in my surroundings, pen flourishing across the page when I know, naturally, the idea for my application. The setting is perfect, and like the opening credits of a movie, my future is beginning. My thoughts are falling into place, there are goose bumps on my arms, and the upbeat promise of what success means is surrounding me, motivating me to that first neuron spark. Okay. You’ve got this. Part D, Berkeley 2005 Requirements for Original Composition (for full list of instructions see page 2). 2500 words. Topic: Dreams. Here goes: I bet nobody’s done this before. April 2015 Dear Journal, We arrived, early of course, and pulled into the loading zone, greeted warmly by the winding line of carts, baggage piles, and the desert stillness before the heat of the morning sun. The lights of the overhead walkway towards the terminal felt almost intimate. My suitcases rolled along the pavement, grumbling, as if still tired, one in Lily’s hand, one in mine. I looked at her; she caught my gaze and I grinned. I loved early rising on travel days, the way I love fireplaces and a book on rainy afternoons...waking up before day break, the sun ascending with my anticipation. The suitcases switched to a purring, like engines of our adventure, revving softly as the ground smoothed near the entrance. My backpack swayed on my shoulders, the weight reminding me of the length of our flight and where we were going. Wait, no, oh that’s right, Lily’s sport bag was slung around one shoulder

and my purse was on the other. No wonder it was so heavy! That was trip two, with carry-ons, Lily’s luggage and an extra sweater in case the air-conditioning was too cold on the plane, tied around my hips in a way that could only be fashionable in airports. None the less! I looked up. Oh, the signs! Arrows pointing this way and that. Hang on; wouldn’t we have used a cart? Just go with it. Think more, write less. No! I mean, write less think – other way – write – less – more! International. Domestic. Car Rentals. Arrivals. Departures. Currency Exchange! “Yesss,” I said quietly, gasping, heart leaping and fluttering into my throat. We’d definitely need that. This was really happening. A feature film, and shooting on location, in Italy! “Thank you Berkeley!” I thought. That school had been the perfect fit for me. The superb selection of fine arts courses, particularly in film, my passion and my major, coupled with my ambition, had successfully led me here to the Palm Springs International Film Festival for the debut of my first original short. Oh, how it had been wonderful. Great plug. I smile proudly at the page. Lily reached out and grabbed my hand. Turned to page two. Always, always a love interest. Where was that, A-ha! Please show proficiency in creating chemistry between characters. So typical. But of course. Her grey Paramount Pictures sweatshirt was pulled up to her elbows. Her forearm grazed then rested against mine so softly my body tingled. She paused, tucking her hair behind her ears, checking our tickets, and when we interlocked hands again. Is that really … can hands interlock? Wouldn’t that mean that – What would that look like? Only the fingers? Same? Godammit Allison, Google it later.

Caboose

Reviews of vancouver bus routes

n u g t o ! s Sh w e i Rev

99 B-Line Claire Vulliamy

4 powell/ubc Marco Ferreira

135 sfu JJ Brewis

THE SEABUS Shannon Elliott

The snootiest of the buses is the 99 B-line. Too good for the majority of the stops, it races down the roads at the speed of light. This bus is also the only bus where they let you weasel your way in through back doors. Fell asleep? You’re screwed. You’ll end up in middle-of-nowhere UBC before you know it. Better yet, take the evolved form of the Broadway B-line: the mythical 99 Boundary B-line that only appears when direly needed, or when you sacrifice a goat. While the regular B-line does an awkward turn down Commercial, dumping all of its passengers to stampede through the Skytrain Station, and then turning away to sit uselessly on an awful looking, short diagonal street, the Boundary B-line goes all deep into the wilds of single-house East Vancouver, and continues to Burnaby. Burnaby! Who doesn’t want to go hang out in Burnaby? Right on Boundary too, so you can shuffle between two cities. Taking the B-line is like being rich and owning a limo that you can take anywhere for free. I live on this bus.

The number 4 bus meets most requirements for a daily commute. The drivers do a suitable job and the passengers are usually reserved. During peak hours the bus can get quite full, but it's never at capacity. It's dependable, and costs an affordable $2.50 per ride. However, I had this strange experience on it: at about 10:45 AM on a Thursday, I was commuting to work, as usual. Suddenly, the driver slowed the bus and turned into the side of a building. A few passengers took note. We scraped along the wall for under a minute before plummeting through the ground into infinite blackness. Some passengers let the driver know that we were no longer taking the normal route. Suddenly, there was a blinding light, and there we were, suspended on the eighth floor of the Bay building downtown. The front of the bus was situated in the mall, so when the driver let the passengers know there would be a major delay, most of us got off. I work close to the Bay, so I walked the rest of my commute; others may have been up to an hour late. For this reason, I can't give the 4 a perfect score out of 10. I give it a 9.2.

You wait. You wait some more. And then you realize they switched the stop AGAIN, just as the 135 goes roaring past, splashing rain, last night's piss, and beer in your face. You chase the bus, only to make it because there are three people in wheelchairs arguing about who got there first. You cram in, and are treated to a tirade from this dumb girl telling her friend over her flip-phone why she doesn't like giving that new guy she's seeing head (his dick smells). Then the bus takes off and you fall into a homeless man and get remnants from his recycled cans all over your new H&M tweed blazer. The bus sails past Main, as the driver jovially yells, "Always be careful when crossing this street, folks. Last week, a pedestrian got SMOKED here!" Awkward laughs fill even the “accordion” middle section. And just as you relax, you realize you are going to be late for the dentist, because never mind anyone getting on, barely anyone is getting off, and you're so far back, you're going all the way to SFU, rotten teeth and all.

The seabus is basically Translink’s way of shitting on everyone who lives in North Van. It takes 15 minutes to cross the Inner Harbour! That’s forever when you’re already late for work. That’s also 15 intermiable minutes of staring awkwardly into a stranger’s eyes, because the seats face each other … the same hard, plastic seats made entirely of right angles. To add insult to injury, the “nice” cushiony new seabus constructed for the 2010 Olympics was deemed too good for regular public use. I presume it now spends most of its time ferrying the dead across the River Styx. It all stinks, but Translink gets away with it because they have tricked tourists into thinking that it’s some kind of cool attraction. That’s right, Korean tourists ride this thing for fun. It’s not the Staten Island ferry, people. Are you expecting a pod of fucking orcas to breach off the starboard bow? The most memorable thing that ever happened on this vessel was that a man jumped off his harbour booze cruise in January and had to be picked up by the seabus mid-voyage. Legend has it that when he realised he was on the seabus he asked to be put back in the water. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, since being forced to take satanic boat rides seems to be a transit tradition in our fine city. I’m talking about you, BC Ferries.

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 6

Tattoos Hairdos and Piercings Crossword // By Kevin Murray

Ombud’s Comics

// Kevin Murray, via comic generator