Capilano Courier Vol 45. Issue 9

“Pushing buttons since 1968�

Volume 45

N O R T H V A N C O U V E R / / N ove m b er 7 , 2 0 1 1

Issue N o. 09

with Health care for all // Viral videos // cultural misappropriation // and so much more ...

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TABle of contents Vol. Fourty-Five | Issue 09

Pushing buttons since 1968

Con ta c t u s Praise? Damnation? Let us know what you think:

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604.984.4949

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editor@capilanocourier.com Contr i b u t i n g

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TUESDAYS at NOON in MAPLE 122 Caveat lector

The Capilano Courier is an autonomous, democratically run student newspaper. Literary and visual submissions are welcomed. All submissions are subject to editing for brevity, taste, and legality.

The Capilano Courier will not publish material deemed by the collective to exhibit sexism, racism, or homophobia. The views expressed by the contributing writers are not necessarily those of the Capilano Publishing Society.

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Gender-neutral bathrooms – I call perving rights

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Calendar

The Capilano Courier is brought to you by the following people ...

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DanRad needs to stop trying to be sexy … I find it inexplicably disturbing editor-in-chief

editor-in-chief

Samantha Thompson

Sarah Vitet

Fea t u r e s

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Suicide is :'(

Ar t s

production mngr.

a rt d i r e c t o r

f e at u r e s e d i t o r

news editor

Shannon Elliott

JJ Brewis

Adélie Houle-Lachance

Gurpreet Kambo

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Viral videos … do you guys remember Peanut Butter Jelly Time? Yuck

Co l u m n s

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Everybody's favourite train wreck: The Lohan! a rt s e d i t o r

opinions editor

Claire Vulliamy

Marco Ferreira

humor

+

fiction editor

Kevin Murray

copy editor

Celina Kurz

Opinions

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Dear Navajo Nation: sorry about the opression, but thanks for all my hip swag

s ta f f w r i t e r

Evelyn Cranston

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events mngr.

Jonty Davies

Caboose business manager

web editor

Ricky Bao

Natahsha Prakash

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OMFG steamy Mark Zuckerberg fan fic!

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from the editor //

I am not a robot “Forbidding newspaper reporters and public radio producers from being regular citizens only empowers the enemies of the press.”

—Conor Friedersdorf

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n Oct. 17, Caitlin Curran was fired from her part-time job as web producer for The Takeaway, an American radio news program on the public radio station WNYC. She was fired as a result of an image that was circulated widely on the Internet: a photograph of her holding a sign at an Occupy protest.

Curran went to Occupy Times Square with her boyfriend, with the intention of observing the events while he held the sign. However, her boyfriend eventually grew tired of having his arms in the air, so Curran temporarily took over.

In that moment, her picture was taken, freezing her in an image that would soon be circulated internationally.

The sign read, “It’s wrong to create a mortgagebacked security filled with loans you know are going to fail so that you can sell it to a client who isn’t aware that you sabotaged it by intentionally picking the misleadingly rated loans most likely to be defaulted upon.” The words were borrowed from an article by Conor Friedersdorf, a staff writer at The Atlantic, in an article he wrote about Occupy Wall Street that explained his criticism against the movement focusing on the symbolic idea of “Wall Street” as opposed to the physical businesses that operate on Wall Street, who should be the focus.

As the image gained popularity, Curran thought that 'it could be fodder for an interesting segment on The Takeaway," she wrote in an article for the Gawker where she detailed the series of unfortunate events that led to the dismissal from her job. “I pitched the idea to producers on the show, in an e-mail.” The next day, the general manager called her and fired her, saying that she “violated every ethic of journalism, and that this should be a ‘teaching moment’ for me in my ca-

JJ Brewis JJ Brewis understands the importance in the perfect balance between cereal and milk. ➼ tinycastles.tumblr.com

reer as a journalist,” wrote Curran.

This presents a very interesting situation.

The Takeaway fired one of their employees for expressing an opinion when she was not on company time, was not raising a particularly controversial sign, and was not taking action in a malicious way. Firing her suggests that journalists should not be allowed to have a life outside of being a journalist. It suggests that choosing journalism as your profession means that you are not allowed to be politically active on your own time, and that you are not allowed to attend protests or involve yourself in other political environments, simply because your professional persona is required to be “unbiased”.

“There are signs that it would be inappropriate for any journalist to hold aloft in Times Square, even during her off hours. For example, ‘Let's Wage A Propaganda War Against Wall Street,’” wrote Friedersdorf in an article he wrote in response to the Curran incident. “Were I presiding over a journalistic organization, I'd fire anyone who publicly asserted or privately advocated subverting accuracy for a political cause.”

It is better that we as journalists are clear and open about our biases. A bias that is concealed from view still exists, and, arguably, hiding it is worse than being upfront about its presence. Media sources have tried for too long to feign objectivity, and yet hints of bias still litter articles and news reports in every paper and on every station.

As Friedersdorf wrote, “To borrow a phrase, every editor who is not too stupid or too full of himself to notice what is going on knows that propagating the myth of ‘objective journalism’ is indefensible. A newspaper or radio program may try to hide or obscure the fact that the people responsible for its content have opinions, convictions, and biases. But it is impossible to function as a journalist without making subjective judgment calls about newsworthiness, relevance and emphasis, or covering issues about which you have an opinion. Pretending otherwise requires

willfully misleading the public.”

There is a significant difference between providing balanced coverage and being objective.

Balanced coverage provides fair opportunity for both “sides” of an issue to have their voices heard; it is easy enough to do. The best any journalist can do in an effort to achieve objectivity is to ensure that their voice stays out of the article.

People want objective news, it’s true. When we see news pretending to be objective and failing, however, readers may understand what they are reading as fact, rather than someone’s subtle opinion. Journalists are human beings with thinking brains, which means that they live the majority of their lives subjectively. Only a robot could live their lives in a truly objective way, which is what Curran’s boss implied that she ought to do when he fired her.

Continuing to pretend that journalists are unbiased to the core would be an incredible disservice to the citizens of society. If you’re aware that bias exists, you can read articles critically and intelligently. Both readers and writers must keep

getti ng!

with JJ Brewis Look for the Voicebox on Tuesday afternoons in the Birch cafeteria, to anonymously “voice” your “opinion” on any “topic.” Introverted alternatives include emailing your opinion to voicebox@capilanocourier.com, or texting (778) 886-5070.

What constitutes a real tiara? I went to Dressew last year while looking for the perfect crown for my King Triton costume, and even their tin and aluminum crowns were running for about fifty bucks! That’s dumb, Dressew.

Everything else in your damn store is almost free. Why you gotta rob the monarchy lovers who wanna spend their Thursday mornings at Mock Wills and Kate brunches at Bon's Off Broadway?

“If I forget a textbook at home, should I run home and get it?”

m i lk

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—Samantha Thompson // editor-in-chief

The Voicebox

“I really wanted to buy a real tiara, but they cost $150!”

cereal

each other accountable in order to maintain transparent and accountable news reporting, but in order to achieve this, the biases of journalists must be acknowledged and approved. If this level of accountability is not maintained, we are setting our society up for an infiltration of propaganda.

This is quite possibly the COOLEST Voicebox message so far this year. I can just imagine some poor first-year sap on their way to Econ 104 wondering if the great and powerful me would be able to save them from this notso-disastrous mess. Don’t you realize this is just a great opportunity to cuddle up to your cute student next to you and say, “Oh hey Maria, I forgot

my textbook at home? Wanna sharesies?” Except don’t say sharesies cause she’ll probably think you’re gay and you’ll become that gay BFF shopping pal, not actually get to home base, y’know? It’s like that Luke Perry guy from Clueless.

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Text

“Girls in plaid, and with toques, almost without fail, tend to be really cute.

Why IS that?”

Oh wow, I wasn’t aware that the marketing CEO from The Gap had the Voicebox phone number. You know who else is really cute in plaid and a toque? My Saint Bernard.

“Are you going to Andrew WK?” I already met him, bro! Last week at the Electric Owl, I was on my way out of the men’s washroom after taking a massive leak, and this man dressed as Andrew WK came up to me and started complimenting my skeleton face. “I’m sorry,” he said, “I’m on a lot of drugs right now. Like, a LOT of them.” I told him it was okay, and tried to leave the washroom, but he WOULDN’T LET ME. He made me text message him then and there so that we could meet up later to “blaze.” By the way, this was only moments before I found Peter Pan’s coat check ticket, and he thanked me by offering me MDMA.

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news

EDIT OR // Gurpreet Kambo // ne w s @ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

New Health Deal for BC First Nations Historic agreement gives First Nations control of own health care

By Tiaré Jung // writer

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

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ncorporating First Nations’ cultural knowledge, beliefs, values, and models of healing into health care could make a significant difference for the wellbeing of indigenous people of British Columbia. A recent agreement to transfer the decision-making for indigenous health care from the BC Ministry of Health to the First Nations Health Authority is designed to do just that. This October, the federal and provincial government signed an agreement with the BC First Nations Health Society and the BC First Nations Health Council to give Aboriginal communities a more direct hand in their health care.

“This agreement means that First Nations will have a strong voice in identifying their healthcare needs, and the power to address those needs as they see best,” says federal Minister of Aboriginal Affairs and Northern Development John Duncan.

The health authorities in BC will continue to provide the most acute health services, but BC First Nations groups will handle the other levels of care. This vision will first be realized as onreserve programs beginning at primary care,

mental-health services, addiction services, and child health initiatives.

According to Provincial Health Officer Perry Kendall, First Nations groups often have a mistrust of health-care providers, leading many to avoid aid until their health problems becomes acute. He believes the new agreement should help remove this barrier of mistrust.

Many First Nations leaders have also praised the initiative, with the belief that control of health care will assist in communities’ self-healing. "We cannot be passive observers in our own lives and the lives of our families and communities,” states the Assembly of First Nations National Chief Shawn A-in-chut Atleo. “This agreement enables First Nations to take a step forward in taking back responsibility for our own lives and for our own communities and nations."

“The difference I want to see is that every First Nations citizen in British Columbia 20 years from now accepts responsibility for their own health and their own wellbeing,” says Grand Chief Doug Kelly, chair of the First Nations Health Council.

The initiative, formally known as The British Columbia Tripartite Framework Agreement on First Nation Health Governance, arose from negotiations that began in 2006. “This agreement

is a result of years of work by BC First Nations to bring forward a First Nation vision of health care,” explains Chief Atleo.

It is projected to take two years for the parties involved to mature into their new roles.

This transition involves the federal government passing the management of responsibilities and finances to the BC First Nations Health Authority.

The federal government has invested $17 million into the transferring process. Currently, the federal government spends about $380 million per year, a cost expected to continue yearly under the new program. As the program expands to account for population growth and other factors, the cost will likely go up. The BC government has committed $83.5 million.

Although unique in its exact nature, the new health care agreement does mirror the previous transference of education and protection of First Nations children in BC into the hands of Native agencies. A decision rooted in valuing indigenous culture, the actual execution was problematic, some critics alleged, due to some Aboriginal children excelling while others fall through the cracks. The new governance structure was developed under a more collaborative process than the hand-over of child protection services,

// Stefan Tosheff notes BC Health Minister Mike de Jong. The new authority will face the struggle of elevating health care costs, but has some measure of security in annual funding.

Federal Minister of Health Leona Aglukkaq says, "This will streamline administration, encourage the integration of the federally and provincially funded health services, and allow health care decisions to be made closer to home. We're proud to partner with B.C. First Nations and the Province of British Columbia on this important initiative." The first of its kind, the new health care policy is “an important and historic milestone for the Harper government, B.C. First Nations and the Province of British Columbia,” said Aglukkaq.

“BC First Nations are demonstrating incredible leadership,” said Grand Chief Kelly. “We will be the first in Canada to take over province-wide health service delivery from the federal government and will work closely with the provincial health system to enable it to better meet First Nations health needs and priorities. Through this new health governance approach, we will see remarkable improvements in the health and wellbeing of First Nations people in BC within one generation, and contribute to the health services accessed by all British Columbians.”

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N e ws Last Friday, students from several local elementary schools were invited to participate in the SNAP Math Fair, an event hosted by Capilano math students in the Lower Cafeteria.

The elementary school children participated in various math games designed by the Cap students to make math fun and engaging (even long division!). Lil’ Stevie here was having an amazing time using math to defend Capilano from invading aliens!

CAMPUS MAY CHANGE The CSU executive meeting on Nov. 2 began with a presentation by Sarah Crawford, a representative from AECOM, the consultant who is working with Capilano University to develop a “Campus Conceptual Development Plan”. At this point in time, the plan is still in its beginning stages, as they are working with various bodies on campus to identify a vision and strategies. The executive discussed some of the things that could be part of the future campus plan, which included items like an on-campus pub and student housing. The plan is meant to assist the physical vision for Capilano over the next 10-20 years and will help develop a campus that is being used to its full potential.

It is yet to be determined what specific direction the plan will take, and what types of consultation will occur.

➼ // Gurpreet Kambo

Occupy This Headline Capilano students occupy cafeteria to provoke dialogue on politics

By Sarah Vitet // Editor-in-chief

SPECIAL GENERAL MEETING SCHEDULED

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After minimal deliberation, the CSU executive voted to schedule a Special General Meeting for Nov. 24 at 11:30am. When the item originally came forward, it was suggested that the meeting be held on Dec. 1, as it would give the executive an additional week to do outreach and prepare documents; however, Parker Busswood, Senate Representative, pointed out that many of the documents were already prepared as they had just had their Annual General Meeting.

The SGM is coming forward as a result of a motion made at the AGM, as a majority of the special resolutions submitted to the AGM’s agenda were not discussed due to a lack of quorum at 1pm (the meeting began at 11:30am). The motion requested that the executive schedule a SGM within two months, and that the agenda for the meeting be comprised of all of the remaining business from the AGM. The agenda for the SGM will be posted two weeks prior to Nov. 24.

By Samantha Thompson // Editor-in-Chief

HARD-HITTING CSU NEWS OF THE WEEK

// Natahsha Prakash covered, including decolonization, thoughts on GMO's, Vancouver City Hall's response to Occupy Vancouver, and protest genres. There were also open mic sessions and group discussions, as well as a media cafe to help students learn how to identify bias in news reporting. The event was organized by a collective of students and faculty, who purposely did not seek permission from the University to use the space.

“The issues that came up are clearly very complicated and in order to make any headway,

Occupy Capilano needs to be ongoing,” Shier says. Although Occupy Capilano was only planned for one day, the interest in continuing the dialogue is apparent, as Munro collected over 40 email addresses from interested students.

“Meetings are in the future because this is now out of my hands and in a collective body of eager students,” says Munro. “Now that we have the email list, we can have meetings and discussions to come up with the issues we feel are necessary to pursue.”

In what has become the biggest news of this semester, the CSU executives now have official nametags for themselves at their board meetings.

This action mirrors Capilano University's Board of Governors, where they have etched gold-plated nametags. Previous to this, meetings would often go on all day, with most of the business being angry points of personal privilege, and motions to reprimand and impeach due to board members calling each other the wrong names. Impressions of the change have been positive – the first board meeting with nametags was cut down to less than a quarter of the time that it averaged previously.

The nametags are made of a solid cream-coloured cardstock, and likely came at a minimal cost to the CSU. Not everyone was happy, however, as Senate Representative Parker Busswood's nametag was erroneously printed as “Busswood Parker”, reflecting a three-hour debate at a previous board meeting over which one is his first name.

By Gurpreet Kambo // News Editor

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

recent initiative at Capilano saw both professors and pupils come together to discuss and promote the Occupy Movement. On Oct. 25, the lower cafeteria was transformed into an arena of discussion, starting at 8:30am and going late into the evening, with varying numbers of students in attendance throughout the day.

Occupy Capilano started with an introduction to the consensus model of organizing by Richard Porteous, an organizer of and active participant in Occupy Vancouver. According to one of the Occupy Capilano organizers, Teeanna Munro, having Porteous attend “really helped facilitate conversation, and answered many students' questions about the Vancouver movement.”

“I can only speak for myself,” says Munro. “But my initial aim for Occupy Capilano was to create an open environment where we could discuss the movement as a whole and find our own voices as students within the movement. I personally think that the Occupy movement affects students and I wanted an environment which facilitated student dialogue.”

Capilano was the first post-secondary institution in the Lower Mainland to organize an Occupy event, though SFU has now held their own as well. Throughout the United States, over 87 post-secondary institutions have held events in solidarity with Occupy Wall Street, hosting teach-ins to raise awareness of the issues regarding OWS, and help students understand their place in the movement.

Current Capilano student Rowen Shier attended over five hours of Occupy Capilano, and encouraged her friends at Langara College to organize their own Occupy event. “I went because, first of all, I had the time, but more importantly, I really support the Occupy movement – and I haven't had much time to participate in Occupy Vancouver,” says Shier. “I wish there had been more people [at Occupy Capilano]. But overall, I thought it was really great. The speakers were very interesting and brought up some great issues. And the discussions were amazing!”

There were many teach-ins throughout the day, both by Capilano instructors, students, and alumni, as well as by external activists and community figures. A wide range of topics were

NEws Brie f s

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news

U of W gets Gender-Neutral Bathrooms Students lead initiative against gender discrimination

By Joanna Graham // The Manitoban (university of manitoba)

W

INNIPEG (CUP) — The University of Winnipeg is moving forward with a plan to have gender-neutral washrooms on campus by the end of the academic year, an initiative that has been spearheaded by student leaders on campus. Students at the University of Manitoba, seeking to follow U of W’s lead, are also pursuing the issue with their own administration.

The University of Winnipeg Students’ Association (UWSA) and the LGBT* Centre had a meeting on Oct. 17 with U of W administration to discuss the issue.

“It was a very positive meeting and we’re incredibly lucky that administration here understands how important it is to make sure that all aspects of the university are inclusive,” says Lauren Bosc, president of UWSA. She explains that since the UWSA board of directors made gender-neutral washrooms one of the top goals for the year, the executive and the LGBT* director have moved forward with making it happen.

Bosc said that the students are currently working on proposals to outline the needs of the washroom.

“We also want to make sure it is wheelchair accessible,” she said. According to Bosc, the issue of gender-neutral washrooms had been raised in 2007, but because of student leader turnover, the conversation had “quieted down.”

Bosc said that her goal was to have the implementation of gender-neutral washrooms complete by the end of this school year.

Debra Radi, the U of W executive director of the office for the vice-president academic, says the U of W administration is involved as a collaborator in exploring how gender-neutral washrooms can be implemented.

“If students identify as transgendered, they need to have a safe space where they feel comfortable in terms of meeting a basic need like go-

ing to the washroom,” says Radi.

Radi said that she has been working with colleagues in the physical plant department to identify potential locations for the washroom.

Of course, labeling is an important issue for the gender-neutral washrooms.

“I’m in favour of something very discreet such as ‘washroom’ because that’s what it is,” says Ro Mills, director of the U of W LGBT* Centre.

“There’s a need, just in terms of inclusive spaces,” Mills says. “Not everybody falls within the binary of male or female … Everybody should be able to use the washroom with ease and accessibility.”

University of Manitoba Students' Union (UMSU) president Camilla Tapp says she thought the U of W’s push for gender-neutral washrooms is great and UMSU is happy to support the organizers.

Tapp explains that gender-neutral washrooms have been a long-standing issue on campus. She says UMSU has heard from individual students, the LGBTTQ* representative on UMSU council and from the Rainbow Pride Mosaic (RPM) that the issue needs to be resolved.

“I think it’s definitely worthwhile to have all future construction include gender-neutral washrooms, and we would like to see the U of M commit to that,” Tapp said.

The coordinator of the RPM, David Vo, explained that the U of M has unisex washrooms but they aren’t the same as gender-neutral washrooms because the unisex washrooms still have signs that indicate the male and female gender.

“In order for it to be truly gender-neutral, there must not be any signs that indicate males or females,” he said.

Vo said there is only one such washroom on the U of M campus, and suggested the U of M should pursue more gender-neutral washrooms so that students can access them in a variety of places.

“It will allow people to be more open-minded,” he said. “It will also attract more people to the university as that will make it more of an accepting place.”

// Britta Bachus

Controversy at CSU General Meeting Very serious business

By Frank Paul

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

// writer

C

ontroversy arose in the Maple building lounge at the CSU’s Annual General Meeting (AGM) on Oct. 27, due to a resolution that was submitted by a general member.

As it always does during this time of year, the CSU held its AGM on Oct. 27 in the CSU Student Lounge. The purpose of the annual meeting is to report to the membership the doings of the executive committee in the past six months, and to present proposed resolutions that the CSU executive committee does not have the power to make themselves (i.e. bylaw changes or matters that are restricted by the bylaws).

Following the establishment of quorum (the minimum number of members required for the meeting to proceed, in this case 40), external chairperson Ben West called the meeting to order. After the presentation of the 2010/2011 audited financial statements, and an update

from the Building Committee about the new student space to be constructed in the Library building, the meeting proceeded to the largest item on the agenda, the consideration of the proposed resolutions.

The meeting’s agenda had a whopping 14 proposed resolutions, which was amended to move three particular resolutions to be considered before the others. These three motions pertained to the construction of a new student lounge, to a bylaw that was alleged to have been broken by the directors, and one, a proposed bylaw change.

The discussion of the order in which they should be considered generated a significant amount of discussion before being approved by the assembly.

Parker Busswood, the chair of the CSU’s Building Committee spoke on the first resolution for consideration, which proposed allocating an additional $75,000 from the previous year’s surplus in the annual operating budget to go towards the new student lounge space, for a total cost of $275,000. The additional funds will provide for

the purchase of equipment for space including high quality furniture, a projector and screen, and additional electronics. The resolution was adopted without any opposition.

The second resolution, which was proposed by a general member, criticized the CSU’s board of directors for entering into a contract that was prohibited by the bylaw XIII of the CSU, which states, “All contracts and agreements entered into by the union exceeding a gross value of $1,000 must be approved by special resolution at a general meeting.” As was reported previously in the Courier, the CSU recently entered into a legal retainer agreement with the law firm Heenan Blaikie, at a cost of $2,000/month.

The motion stated that because the executive, upon realizing they were in conflict with Bylaw XIII, did not terminate the contract (which allows termination at any time), they acted outside of their authority. The motion asked for the assembly to recognize that the executive acted outside of their authority, that the contract be terminated

immediately, and also outlined provisions for what should happen in the event the executive violates CSU bylaws in the future.

A heated debate ensued, which included a justification of the benefits of the legal retainer agreement by the CSU directors. However, some members of the audience strongly objected in light of the fact that a bylaw was broken and the sentiment that the agreement should be dissolved until the proper procedure is followed, which in this case would be for the proposal to come to an AGM. As debate on this resolution wore on, quorum was lost as members in attendance dropped below 40. Due to the oss of quorum, the result of votes on motions are no longer binding, but instead are merely recommendations. A recommendation was then presented by a member that called for a Special General Meeting to be held sometime in the next two months to discuss the remaining resolutions which did not receive consideration. This recommendation was accepted before the AGM was adjourned.

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t h e ca p ca l e n da r C e l i na W i th

Kur z !

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Contact us to have your event featured in the calendar.

D on’t forget the date, time, address, and price!

m o n d a y n o v. 7 SHONEN KNIFE @ THE BILTMORE Shonen Knife is an all-girl pop-punk band from Japan, so you know it's gonna be fucking awesome. Think Ramones slash Powerpuff Girls.

Pick up your tickets in advance at Zulu or Red Cat Records!

8 PM. The Biltmore Cabaret. $14+service charge.

t u e s d a y n o v. 8 THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS This is my pre-teenhood, right here. But in all honestly, if you've never listened to TMBG, check it out. It's all catchy nonsense awesome groovy songs. The dudes who did Homestar Runner once made a video for them! FACT: I will probably end up going to this show with my parents lol.

8 PM. Venue. $25.50.

HOW TO GET YOUR EVENT INTO THE CALENDAR MONDAY Either have an event so awesome that I want to go to it, be a person that I love and therefore want to shout out, or send an email to copy. capcourier@gmail.com. It's that easy! Pro tip: send it to me shortly before the event happens, or I will forget about it and lose the email in my heaps of emails.

Any time, Anywhere! Cheap as Free!

JAZZ NIGHT AT GOLDIE'S This Monday has ShhEnsemble, a group which features Sean Cronin on bass, Evan Arntzen on saxophone/clarinet, Joe Poole on drums, and Bruno Hubert on piano. These guys are all really good at jazz, so come and give them a little money and eat a little pizza!

7 – 12 PM. Goldie's Pizza and Lounge (605 W. Pender St.). By donation!

HOLY GHOST! From JJ: Dance party!! DFA Records, famous for such dance-rock gems as LCD Soundsystem and The Rapture present NYC electro duo, touring their self-titled debut LP. People who like to stand and look bored exempt.

8 PM. Electric Owl. $15.

SNOOZEDAY TUESDAY Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! Lol! All day long. In ya bed. Free!

CIRCLE CRAFT FAIR It's that time of year again: craft fair time!

Circle Craft is one of Vancouver's biggest craft fairs, and it only runs from Nov. 9 to Nov. 11. It's a little expensive to get in, but the stuff inside is super lovely and inspirational and, best of all, handmade! I'm going with my family and my friend Emma! Nov. 9 – 11 (see circlecraft.com for times). Vancouver Convention Centre West (1055 Canada Place). $12/$10 online.

WING WEDNESDAY Louisiana chicken wings are my favourite food, hands down, period. Not entirely true: I also love pizza, steak, smoothies, anything with garlic in it, and Chinese food. Anyway, if you Google “wing wednesday vancouver”, you are guaranteed to find a place that is offering some deal on wings.

I'm not doing the legwork on this one.

You Google it! You figure it out! As cheap as 30¢/wing.

GWAR + EVERY TIME I DIE FUCK YEAH. WOOP WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. 7 PM. Commodore Ballroom. $44.

DAVID LYNCH IS RELEASING AN ALBUM? David Lynch of Twin Peaks and Blue Velvet fame is releasing an album today. The album is called Crazy Clown Time. What the fuck, David Lynch!

Who are you! You can do anything you want! $18.48 pre-order on Amazon.ca

SENSATION OF MAGIC “Vitaly Beckman uses the arts and crafts of illusion in 70 minutes of mind-bending magic.”

No one does magic in a serious way anymore, so I hope this lives up to what I'm imagining it to be. To be fair, almost any kind of sleight-of-hand blows my mind; if this guy produces a scarf out of nowhere, I will be flabbergasted and instantly sold. Nov. 8 – 20, 8 PM. The Cultch (1895 Venables St.). $25/22.

FORME: EXPLORING FASHION'S BORDERS This event promises to include “sensual music, design and fashion.” Lotus Eye, a local fashion house, is presenting their “capsule collection of crossover Indian and contemporary designs.”

Expect fashion with heavy South Asian influences. Fun! 9 PM. Ayden Art Gallery (88 W. Pender St.). $16.89 (only available online!).

DID YOU KNOW THAT Today is celebrated English author Neil Gaiman's birthday! Celebrate however you want to celebrate: read one of his books such as American Gods, have a couple glasses of wine, write a piece of slash fiction about two of his characters … the possibilities are limitless, just like the imagination of Neil Gaiman.

NOW YOU KNOW.

w e d . n o v. 9 DAN MANGAN @ THE ORPHEUM I'm not going to beat around the bush; I'm really not a huge Dan Mangan Fan. However, I can understand why people would like him: he's cute, he has a beard, he's very inoffensive, he sings that cute song about robots. So, if you like him, this is the date that he will be here! Don't miss it or you'll probably regret it! 8 PM. The Orpheum. $36.

t h u r s d a y n o v. 1 0 TOMORROW, HARRY POTTER 7 PART 2 COMES OUT ON DVD So, watch Harry Potter 7 part 1 in preparation!

Watch it with a girl or a boy! Make it a date!

Start KISSING afterwards.

8 PM. Your house. Free!

A PLAN BEE EVENT Clever title! This evening showcases Queen of the Sun, a film which “[takes] us on a journey through the catastrophic disappearance of bees and the mysterious world of the beehive … [and] weaves an unusual and dramatic story of the heartfelt struggles of beekeepers, scientists and philosophers from around the world.” Beeeautiful. 7 – 10 PM. The Ridge Theatre (3131 Arbutus St.). $29.

f r i d a y n o v. 1 1 REMEMBRANCE DAY Never forget.

All day. Canada. Nothing is free!

s a t u r d a y n o v. 1 2

CHRIS-A-RIFFIC, ABERNETHY, LITHIUM, NOVA I have so much love for Chris-A-Riffic. One of Vancouver's most fantastic men/musicians. The other guys I'm not so familiar with, but they sound awesome too; Nova promises “dark and dreamy tunes” and contains ex-members of Organ Trail including Caitlin Gilroy (who I also got crazy love for), and Kid Lithium plays “unconventional” hiphop with “thoughtful lyrics and macabre beats”.

8 PM. Blim (115 E. Pender St.). $10.

GUIDED BY ROBOTS Annual celebration of Ohio's greatest lo-fi rockers, Guided By Voices! Be serenaded by locals SK Robot playing all your favourite Guided by Voices covers, theb get up on stage and sing your favourite song! Which will you pick? Tractor Rape Chain? Echos Myron? Hot Freaks? By “you” I mean “I”. I can't pick. PS all the money from this show is donated to Vancouver Rape Relief and Women's Centre. Hooray! 9 PM. The Anza Club. By donation!

s u n d a y n o v. 1 3 FAMILY DAY AT SURREY ART GALLERY Commit today to your fam-jam! This drop-in event “invites families to explore, enjoy, and create art together as they participate in activities inspired by the exhibitions.” Cool cool cool.

12 – 4 PM. Surrey Art Gallery (13750 88th Ave.). $4.

VAN. RECITAL SOCIETY ALEXANDER MELNIKOV Who is Alexander Melnikov? He's a pianist!

According to Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung, “Melnikov’s playing has wonderful colour and imagination.” This evening's programme includes Schubert's Wanderer Fantasy, Brahms' 7 Fantasies, Op. 116, and Shostakovich's Preludes and Fugues, Op. 87 (1-12). Embrace classical music! Pre-recital talk 2:15, recital 3 – 5 PM. The Chan Centre (6265 Crescent Rd.). $40.50 – 62.50.

WORLD KINDNESS DAY This is a real holiday, apparently, and apparently it “encourages individuals to overlook boundaries, race, and religion.” You wanna know how I feel about it, honestly? I think it's a load of shit.

If you feel like being nice, be nice. If someone pisses you off, fuck that shit, give 'em the finger.

Kindness is not always the answer. THIS IDEA ENRAGES ME. I'm not attending this on Facebook o' clock.

Stupidtown. “Free”.

MEDIA DEMOCRACY DAY This event “brings together citizens, academics, artists, activists, students, community leaders, and policy makers in a dynamic dialogue on the state of the Canadian and global media systems.” Critical thinking is as cool as rock and roll! This event will feature all sorts of workshops and lectures, so be sure to check itt out! Nov. 11 – 13 (see mediademocracyday.org for more details). Vancouver Public Library. Free!

LITTLE MOUNTAIN SHOW Featuring Slight Birching, Daughter of Khan, Chris-A-Riffic, and the Selkies! This show is gonna have so much love: not only are all of these bands fucking awesome, it's at Little Mountain Gallery, the most beautiful little venue that could! Now I'm all confused because I want to go to this show but I also really want to go to Guided by Robots. 7 – 10:30 PM. Little Mountain Gallery (195 E. 26th Ave.). $5.

WRECK BEACH CLEANUP The very idea of garbage at a beach makes me unhappy! If you feel the same way, head over to Wreck Beach and join the litter-picking-up crew.

There is an afterparty??? Partying is awesome, garbage is boring! Win-win!

1 – 4 PM. Wreck Beach. Free! Afterparty @ Academic Public House.

NEXT YEAR THERE WILL BE A TOTAL SOLAR ECLIPSE ON THIS DAY This is a way, way better thing to celebrate. The world is an exciting place! Today, celebrate next year's total solar eclipse in Australia by turning off all of the lights in your room, drawing the blinds, and pretending there is a solar eclipse.

Invite your friends! Make it into a party!

I'm not sure the exact time. Australia. Free!

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M83 WITH ACTIVE CHILD From JJ: I have been waiting for this day for years! At last, my favourite French ambient electro dream prince comes back to town to personally serenade me with tunes from his newest (and best!) album. I feel sorry for my friends who are going with me because I’m probably going to weep.

7 PM. Venue. Sold out! Limited tickets at door.

MOST EPIC WISH EVER Lol this is an actual event on Facebook with over a million people attending! “On November 11, 2011 at 11:11 the date will be 11/11/11 11:11.

Since 11:11 is the best time for wishing, this day will be pretty epic.” So make a wish! Magic happens! I'm keeping my wish a secreeeeettttttt!

11:11 AM. Everywhere. Nothing is free …

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F e at u res

EDIT OR // Ad él ie Houl e- Lachance // s pe c i al fe ature s . c apc o uri e r@ gmai l . c o m

DON’T GO BREAKING MY ART

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Artists left scrambling for studio spaces in Vancouver

who are struggling to make a living are forced

By Marja-Leena Corbett to pack up and leave this beautiful city, where// Writer as some end up taking work in the trades as a icasso once said “Every child is an artist. means of survival.

The problem is how to remain an artist The solution seems simple: artists need places once we grow up.” In other words, as we to work. They need support from the city, and for grow older, we often begin to underestimate the officials to truly understand the importance of importance of art. This certainly seems to be the the arts community in Vancouver. It seems the case in Vancouver: the arts community is huge, city is falling short. and yet the city seems to be on an upward trend THE JUICE MAN of taking away artists’ studio spaces, their places to work and, consequentially, a huge part of their The Juice Man is Gregor Robertson, current identity. Without space to create, many artists Mayor of Vancouver and well-known as the

P

founder and former CEO of the company Happy Planet Foods; thus, his nickname “the juice man”. A website has been set up by local artists in support of Robertson and the Vision Vancouver team, called www.webackthejuiceman.ca.

These artists show their support by submitting their creative contributions to the website and by holding fundraisers.

Cameron Reed of “We Back the Juice Man” explains further: “We are supporters of Vision Vancouver and wanted to inject a little fun into the campaign. As cultural organizers, actors, artists, musicians, filmmakers, and comedians

// Illustrations by Katie So ourselves, we thought the best way to support was to provide something creative and engaging.” As he puts it, “Vision is doing a great deal to support the local arts community. For instance, despite the recession and every other level of government cutting funding to the arts, Vision did not. They have made themselves incredibly accessible to the community.”

In response to “We Back the Juice Man”, a blog was created called wedontbackthejuiceman.tumblr.com. This blog has been a powerful tool for the local artists who are opposed to Robertson and Vision, and believe he is instilling

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F e atu r e s Maybe what the general public needs is a wake-up call to what we’re lacking in today’s consumer based society. As Wing expresses, “When people feel a connection to community, it can change people’s lives; when they are able to share their gifts and witness each other in our rites of passage throughout life … Through having a home for community, we can build greater resiliency in the world that is changing rapidly. As you can see with Occupy Vancouver, people really want to be in a village-like environment where inter-generational connectivity occurs and shared values can be realized in an active way.”

Community is what this is all about. Without adequate physical spaces, there is no place for arists, healers, and change agents to bring forward inspiration and renewal of our culture.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

false hope in people. Could it be that the Juice Man is deceiving us?

"If Vision were serious about supporting the arts, they would deal with the housing crisis in Vancouver and own up to the promises they made regarding social housing and the empty condo tax," says Joseph Hirabayashi, a musician who is heavily involved with Vancouver’s music scene and plays in multiple bands, including media darlings The SSRI’s. "If market housing and gentrification continues to be a norm in Vancouver, I will one day be forced to move away from my hometown."

CLOSED DOORS Several other cafes have put up a good fight before finally submitting themselves to the poor economy. The Soma Cafe, another very art-involved cafe on Main St., has changed locations, and the Aurora Cafe has closed down. As well, Nyala Restaurant on Main St. is closing in November. The many galleries that have been shut down include the Lido Gallery, the Grace Gallery, and the Dianne Farris Gallery.

Luck is far out of reach for many artists and musicians. The Red Gate is a cultural facility that provides a space for artists to collaborate and create, and is 100 per cent self-funded and self-organized. After seven solid years, the city has issued an order to vacate, leaving many artists and musicians at a complete loss as to what to do, and more importantly, where to go.

Two galleries that have not gotten as much attention from the media are Access Gallery and The Jem Gallery. Both are being evicted from their spaces. These galleries are hard-working and dedicated to showcasing both emerging and established artists. Access is geared more towards contemporary art, while The Jem Gallery focuses on underground artists.

With the amount of artists that are being evicted from their galleries and studios, there seems to be an unequal emphasis placed on the arts in Vancouver. If the city council is unable to step up to the plate and show their support, it is up to the rest of the Vancouver population to be understanding of artists at this time, and to set a leading example.

THE VOICE OF YOUTH This is not to say that everyone in Vancouver is neglecting the importance of art. The youth in Vancouver have a powerful voice that deserves attention.

The Purple Thistle, for example, is a youthrun centre that is an “alternative-to-school community institution for youth on the Eastside of Vancouver.” This is a place dedicated to activism and the arts. It was founded in 2001 by Matt Hern, and has been growing ever since.

“We run a 2,500 square foot resource centre that has a ton of supplies, tools, materials, classes, and workshops, and it’s all free. There’s a library, bike-fixing shop, computer lab, silkscreening room, animation facility, and lots else. And maybe best of all, the whole thing is run by a youth collective that controls all the day to day operations and really runs the place.” The services at the Purple Thistle are almost all free, and include classes and workshops, as well as the use of supplies and equipment.

The Purple Thistle has four options to choose from for people who want to use its resources.

It is open in the afternoons and evenings for drop-in, where people are free to use supplies to work on any project, or can bring a group of friends and collaborate on ideas. The second option is the many different projects and classes.

There are drawing, photography, silk-screening, web design and even gardening classes, plus specific classes for younger children. During the day, there are full-time, paid training programs.

The central focus is on arts, community work, and activism.

Perhaps, open art spaces for youth such as the Purple Thistle that inspire radical ideas and encourage creative enthusiasm could mean an implementation of change in Vancouver.

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Renting a place to live is hard enough on its own without also scraping up enough money to rent a studio space. “I mean, how do you go rent something for $4,000 a month and then pay that off? You can’t live there as well. That’s how they make that happen, you can’t live in the space because it’s not zoned or safe. They have to sort of relax the zoning in areas.”

“I blame all of the developers who move in to an area. I blame the restrictions for not allowing exhibitions in places because they’re just so strict on the guidelines on where you can actually do things,” say Gough. He goes on to explain that the art in our city is too regulated. Rather, he SPEAKING OUT believes that art should be allowed to be more Art is everywhere. It is an incredible force that spontaneous: with the way things currently are in brings people together, because everyone in the Vancouver, artists have to go through a multitude world can enjoy it, whatever language, national- of steps and procedures to produce and display ity, or cultural identity. Art is universal and is a their artwork for the general public. way of connecting us with tourists from other CREATING A PLACE TO CREATE places, with each other, and most importantly, with ourselves. Without it, “how do any new ideas With an increasing amount of places losing get sparked? There is just nowhere for young art- money and being forced to shut down, the arts ists, or any artists for that matter, to just experi- community cannot grow without a solid ground ment and explore and work with new ideas. How to base itself on. does anything get done if you can’t afford to go do Sobey Wing, local producer and event organizit?” notes Brad Gough of East Van Studios. er of the Tribal Harmonix dance community, is Gough believes that the city of Vancouver is part of an effort to create a space to be called the nowhere near as understanding of artists and Intention Centre. It is inspired by a winter retreat their needs as they should be. “People don’t re- called Intention that has been happening on the alize how important art is, and that it isn’t just outskirts of the Lower Mainland for 12 years, about a painting. Even when you talk to people in which aims to build community that intersects sports who think that the arts are a waste of time, through electronic dance music, live music, arts, you have to just remind them, who designed healing modalities, sustainability, social activism, your uniform? Who composed your song? Who and non-sectarian spirituality. choreographed your cheerleaders? They don’t The vision is “a space where we can have an understand where art is even involved in sports. ongoing daily development of our community Without these people, then how does any of that expression without having to take everything get done?” down after each event. The programs we’d offer The issue lies within the city council and its and our celebrations would allow us an oppordevelopers. As Gough expresses, “I’d like to see tunity to reach further levels of maturity in the Robertson put his money where his mouth is … art of community. We'd be able to offer more to I’ve heard the talk for too many years, let’s see the people than booking venues elsewhere includaction. Nothing is done, and I don’t know where ing a stable space for families and children to anybody young is supposed to live, work and participate in our community. We would have do anything and be able to afford it in this town. workshops that build skills, our expression, and It’s impossible.” sustainability.”

Food and art: what a delectable combination.

Although many galleries are closing their doors, our addiction to caffeine and love of quality pastries has kept the doors of many independent cafés open, some of which offer their space as a venue to be used by local community groups and artists. This is a symbiotic relationship, with the community gaining by having new spaces for art, and the cafés gaining new customers.

One such place is the Rhizome Café, which boasts great food, events, and activism, as well as art. Co-founder of the Rhizome Café, Lisa Moore, explains, “We’re a hub for the social justice communities. We do a lot of work with many different community groups that are working on issues related to social justice, whether that be migrant justice or indigenous sovereignty, or environmental justice. As well, we host events in coordination with those groups three or four times every week.”

The Rhizome is an important venue for all members of the community, where nearly 200 events are held each year. There is also a meeting room which can be rented out for classes and workshops “for activists and organizers who are working around social justice issues” to plan and discuss their ideas. As Moore explains, “In general, we host a lot of performances, whether that be literary events, music, or visual arts, and that’s the way we participate as part of an arts community.”

Although the Rhizome appears to be going strong, this café, amongst many others, has been facing financial constraints. While this can be taxing, according to Moore, the Rhizome is not at risk of closing. Fortunately they have a supportive community behind them, and appealing to the community for financial support is “very much in line with how we [The Rhizome] want to operate.”

They want to be a community supported space, and this is a new way for them to do that.

“In a city that is so expensive, it’s hard to maintain community spaces, which is why we’re taking on this new initiative,” says Moore.

She is not the only one with this inspiring mindset. Café Deux Soleils on Commercial Drive hosts entertainment every night, and displays rotating artwork from local artists.

Similarly, the Naam Restaurant also has daily live music and regular art shows. As well, the Waldorf Hotel is known for offering a very wide range of art, music, food, culture, and ongoing events. The Nuba Café serves Lebanese cuisine, and the creative minds of Cameron Reed, Lisa Delux, Patrick Campbell, and many more are all a part of the Waldorf’s creative community.

Raw Canvas puts a real spin on eating out, with a dynamic and extremely unique set up involving good food, wine, and art, making for an

entirely different way of socializing. The front of the lounge is where the bar and tables are, and in the back, a variety of canvases are set up, along with all the other necessary supplies to create a painting.

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f e atures

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any professionals, organizations, and individuals who are involved in the mental health field are aware of stigmas attached to suicide. According to some, this stigma is a product of history, policy, and cultures. The Canadian Mental Health Association explains, “Suicide is the second leading cause of death among young people after motor vehicle accidents, yet people are often reluctant to discuss it. This is partly due to the stigma, guilt, or shame that surrounds suicide.”

Here to Help, a Vancouver organization that specializes in mental health and substance abuse, elaborates on this stigma as it exists within Canada. Suicide is often considered a taboo subject, although it is has a constant presence in our society; a presence that is likely closer to you than you might be aware of. According to Here to Help's stats, 3,500 people in Canada take their own lives annually. “That’s more lives lost than from traffic accidents and murders combined,” as per their website. The high amount of suicide in Canada is not mentioned in the public because it is what Here to Help calls a “hidden epidemic”.

Bonny Ball, who was living in North Vancouver when her 21-year-old son committed suicide, explains the impact of the suicide stigma: “Unlike other deaths, survivors quickly discover that talking about a suicide brings dinner conversations to a screeching halt. But the true impact of stigma is that it keeps survivors from connecting with each other, robbing us of both 'like me' support and the opportunity to band together with professionals to 'make a difference.' ” Ball explains, “The worst impact of stigma was not when our son died, but after his first suicide attempt. Stigma meant that we told no one. Stigma thus isolated us from the very support and information that might have made a difference then.”

Shinpei Kokuzawa had recently lived in Vancouver for the good part of two years before returning home to Tokyo. He was popular, a talented athlete, well-educated, and soon to be an uncle. For much of his life he was surrounded by good people who encouraged and loved him. However, for most of his teenage years he struggled desperately with depression. After multiple suicide attempts, and a few days after being released from a doctor’s care, on April 2, 2011, Shinpei killed himself in his home.

He was 19 years old when he committed suicide. Shinpei was my little brother.

—Mike Conway, writer for the Capilano Courier and Capilano University student

Pips929 is an online organization that offers suicide information, prevention, and emergency help information. Their website claims that the stigma of suicide has its roots in history, concluding that religious philosophers and politicians, such as Socrates, St. Augustine, John McManners, John Wesley, and Thomas Aquinas “fortified the Church's official position against suicide,” and “vilified suicide as an act against God, and denounced suicide as a sin for which one could not repent.” According to this website, “As a result of religious, civil, and criminal sanctions against suicide, the social stigma of suicide reached menacing heights during the Middle Ages.”

However, in the last 400 years, philosophers such as Montesquieu, Voltaire, John Donne, Emile Durkheim, and Sigmund Freud have begun to challenge and reshape the views society has on suicide. Pips929 explains, "Donne used the laws of Nature, Reason and God, as well as biblical text, to defend Christians' rights to choose death. Suicide was once again a topic of philosophical debate. The French philosophers, Montesquieu and Voltaire, both argued in defence of an individual's right to choose suicide. … The notion that mental or emotional distress could be caused by natural, physical factors helped pave the way for changes in civil, criminal and religious laws concerning suicide.”

Pips929 also says that another such break in the rethinking of suicide came when “in 1983, the Roman Catholic Church reversed the canon law that prohibited proper funeral rites and burial in church cemeteries for those who had died by their own hand.” It concludes, “One of the reasons suicide is less stigmatized today is the understanding that outside pressures, or societal stressors, can contribute to suicidal behaviour.”

TEARING AT THE SEAMS Lo o king at suicide as a so cietal p h e n o m e n o n

by Mike C o nway / / writ e r

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f e atu r e s prevention organizations throughout the Fraser Valley, disagrees with Falcon. Rathwell explains, “It isn’t true to say that the bridge barriers don’t work … [but] they won’t work for everyone. The barriers are successful because they save some people, not everyone.” "[Suicide prevention] is a very complicated field. The best we have are barriers. Each person’s problems are different, which makes

Canucks, in a public address in regards to the level of help Rypien received from the organization prior to his death. “We relied on different facilities. We relied on lots of people. There is no blueprint. I think it ebbs and flows depending on circumstances that are beyond your control, often.” Gillis didn’t elaborate on the specific treatments used. “I don’t want to talk about that,” he said. “As anybody knows who’s dealt with these issues in the past, there’s no answer, there’s no defined course of action. If there was, we’d all be better off.”

Like Gillis and the NHL, many organizations that offer mental health support offer a multifaceted treatment and approach to mental health issues. However, warns Erica Weir, author of Suicide: The Hidden Epidemic, “despite gains in insight and methodology, since the 1970s there has been an almost universal upward trend in suicide rates, particularly among young men.”

Weir believes that high suicide rates are the failure of governments to “identify suicide as a critical public health priority.” Weir’s research shows that “in the 1970s, Canadian suicide rates overtook US rates, and they have remained consistently higher.” Despite the fact that, says Weir, “in 1996, the World Health Organization and the United Nations urged member nations to address the growing problem of suicide and provided guidelines for the formulation and implementation of national prevention strategies,” but by 2006 “only five countries (Australia, Finland, New Zealand, Norway and Sweden) had comprehensive national strategies. … Canada falls alongside Austria, Denmark, Germany and Japan as countries that were not taking action nationally.” Weir explains that these strategies generally contain “promoting awareness of suicide as an important, preventable public health problem and developing strategies to reduce the stigma associated with seeking psychiatric help or substance-abuse and suicide-prevention services.”

prevention very difficult, and sadly, impossible in all cases. But the bridges are a very convenient place to commit suicide, so we have to be there and do everything we can.” However, says Rathwell, “I think it should be obvious that most prevention is done by family, friends, and doctors, who are able to look for, and address warning signs appropriately. Bridge barriers are a small safeguard for a small percentage of suicides.” Ultimately, “love, an active community, and an understanding of the issues are what save people,” he concludes.

Grohol, like Rathwell, believes that "bridges should be proofed against suicide and that a human life is worth more than a slightly-obstructed view.” Grohol attacks the argument that suicidal people “will just find another way to commit suicide.” He relies on the work done by Richard Seiden, a retired professor and psychologist at the University of California, who “published a study showing that the vast majority of people who are thwarted from jumping from a bridge don’t go on to commit suicide.” Grohol explains, “This misperception that we cannot stop people from hurting themselves is false – research data shows that we can. Because suicide is often an irrational, in-the-moment act, simple barriers are extremely effective in helping a person make the choice to live another day until the crisis has past. … While we can’t prevent all suicides, we can certainly make certain types of suicide a thing of the past.”

Francisco, talks about a different approach to suicide prevention: “Instead of only looking to help treat people most at risk for suicide (people who suffer from depression, for instance), public health officials are also looking at the common means in which suicide is committed.” The “band aid” approach, says Grohol, “is relatively new in the public health sector and one that we support. While we can’t remove all methods of suicide and people will always commit suicide, we can take a common-sense approach and work to reduce some of the more popular and easy-to-fix methods.”

Opponents to the idea of suicide barriers on Vancouver bridges is Kevin Falcon, British Columbia’s Minister of Transportation and Liberal MLA of Surrey-Cloverdale. Falcon had a firsthand experience with the difficulties and inconveniences associated with potential jumpers when he was trapped in traffic during a Canada Day jumper episode in 2008. After the incident, he demanded both on television and in print interviews alternatives to full-on closures, while also dismissing the idea of suicide-preventionbarriers on the bridges.

"We need to be sensitive to people in distress,” he said, “[but] we also need to think about the ramifications of paralyzing the system and jeopardizing the lives of others.” In regards to the barriers, “the budgetary cost isn’t even an issue, but they’re considered a visual eyesore.” Falcon concludes, “Suicidal people tend to be ingenious about their methods.”

In a report done by CTV: British Columbia's Carrie Stefanson the day after the Canada Day bridge closure of 2008, Vancouver Police Const.

Tim Fanning spoke on behalf of the Vancouver Police Department in response from Falcon and the media, saying, “The measures we took yesterday were absolutely necessary in guaranteeing the safety of the woman on the bridge.” Moreover, the Police who were at the scene said, “The woman's life was saved because of their decision JUMPING TO A BETTER PLACE to close the bridge indefinitely while a negotiator Vancouver, like a few other notable cities includ- tried to talk the woman down from the ledge.” ing San Francisco, New York, and Oakland, are Nick Rathwell, who has worked in suicide

to eight times more frequently than for other Canadian youths; and people with prior histories of attempted suicide.”

According to Canada.com, “More women attempt suicide, [but] about four times as many men as women die from their suicide attempt.”

The reason for this appears to be that “men generally use more lethal means such as firearms, hanging, or asphyxiation (suffocation). Women

// Illustrations by JJ Brewis often use drug overdoses or asphyxiation, or they cut themselves."

Information from Here to Help adds that “Canadian seniors make up 12 per cent of all suicides. In BC, the suicide rate for all men averages out to 17.5 deaths per 100,000 people; men over 85 have double that rate. A shrinking circle of friends, the death of a spouse, or a major illness can all lead to depression and in turn lead to suicide.”

Still, the upward trend in suicide continues, Here to Help explains: “In the last 45 years suicide rates have increased by 60 per cent worldwide. Suicide is now among the three leading causes of death among those aged 15-44 years [both sexes].”

AN APPLE A DAY …

According to Vancouver-based Counselling, a private mental health service directory, there “are more than 400 psychologists, counsellors, therapists, and other professionals” in the Fraser Valley. This is because, according to Counselling, “anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, excessive anger, and addictions” are some of the most common causes potentially leading to suicide.

Counselling is one of many ways people overcome their suicidal thoughts, though there are many other groups available that deal with issues that indirectly help people overcome suicide.

Hospice organizations, drug and alcohol rehab groups, and community centers are a few of the many specialized ways in which the community SUICIDE IN MINORITY GROUPS attempts to help.

Canada.com, a Canadian-based online news For those who have experienced suicide as the source, says in their Facts on Suicide section, loss of a loved one, this experience does have the “Certain groups have disproportionately high potential to be channelled into an empowering suicide rates compared to the general popula- one; the aforementioned Bonny Ball has turned tion.” These groups include “young men be- her grief into a powerful tool to change the public tween the ages of 20 and 24; senior men over perception of suicide. She is now Acting Vicethe age of 80; prison inmates, for whom suicide President and Chair of the Survivors Division, is the leading cause of death; people of First Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention.

Nations and Inuit descent, who have suicide She is also Project Manager of Vancouver Suicide rates three to six times greater than the nation- Survivors Coalition, a project of the Consumer al average; this is even higher for adolescents Initiative Fund of Vancouver Community Mental 15 to 19 years old, with suicide occurring up Health Services.

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looking for solutions to the problem of people jumping from high, public places. Scholars and With the recent suicide death of Rick Rypien, for- officials have been researching the impacts of mer player for the Vancouver Canucks, the topic placing suicide barriers on public structures that of suicide prevention has once again been raised are known areas of suicide, such as the bridges in in the media. “We relied on experts and we relied and around Vancouver. on both the NHLPA [National Hockey League John M. Grohol, Doctor of Psychology, and Players Association] and the NHL doctors,” says founder and editor-in-chief of PsycCentral, a Mike Gillis, General Manager of the Vancouver mental health organization based out of San NO MAGIC CURE

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EDIT OR // Cl aire Vul l iamy // arts @ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

CATCH VIRAL VIDEO FEVER Capilano Campus Fun committee launches competition to make you famous “Viral videos are popular because they are so accessible, whether you make one to upload or // Writer just to watch,” says Jen Scott, one of the shown 1968 Andy Warhol uttered the words, “In down’s creators. the future, everyone will be world-famous for The concept of “viral” anything is hardly new.

15 minutes.” In 2003, the family of Star Wars Businesses have relied on viral marketing for Kid sued his classmates because they forced him into his 15 minutes. The video of him recreating the intricate lightsaber form used by Darth Maul in Episode I became one of the most viewed videos of all time. Joining the ranks of The Numa Numa Guy, Antoine Dobson, Chris Crocker, David (After Dentist), Afro Ninja, and Tay Zonday, Star Wars Kid will go down in history as a viral video superstar.

Students at Capilano University are no strangers to this phenomenon. The Campus Fun committee of the Arts and Entertainment Management program are eager to launch the next number-one-viewed video on Youtube through their Viral Video Showdown. Though there was no main inspiration for the concept, the team settled on the showdown “to help expose the talents of Capilano students while having a good // Sarah Taylor time doing so.”

By Amita Gore

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years. It is the fact that there are now thousands of videos accessible to any individual with an internet connection that turns this into a truly amazing phenomenon.

America’s Funniest Home Videos, on air since 1989, was once the only spot to get your fix of animals and babies being adorable, or people getting injured in hilarious ways. The show still has impressive ratings, which one can wager is more because it limits how many videos one watches in a single evening, rather than spending hours upon hours clicking through “related videos”.

Not all TV programming has kept its footing in the internet age, however. MTV steadily decreased their airtime for music videos during the 2000s before leaving them out altogether, even though artists haven’t stopped making videos.

The incredible overnight success of acts such as The Lonely Island and Ok Go can be accredited mostly to video sharing sites and the spread of their music videos through social media. Youtube holds incredible rates of viewership, with over 2 billion videos viewed a day, as of 2010.

As Morris says, “Who wouldn't want to make a video and become the new Justin Bieber?” He

is referring, of course, to the fact that the pop sensation was discovered after his mother uploaded videos of him covering top 40 hits on to YouTube. Now, Justin Bieber’s “Baby” is the #1 viewed video on YouTube. Beyond music, YouTube has launched the careers of several “internet celebrities” who share their talents, such as Neil Cicierega, creator of Harry Potter Puppet Pals, and Darren Criss of A Very Potter Musical and, now, Glee fame.

The Viral Video Showdown inbox is currently empty, and submissions are due on Nov. 18 at midnight. So, if you enjoy recording your friends injure themselves in new and exciting ways, or if you have an exceptional talent you would like to share with the world, this is your chance! “The possibilities are endless,” explains Nikki Mawiv, a student on the Showdown’s panel. There are excellent prizes to be won in six categories, ranging from most views to best comedy.

Check out the Facebook event page “Viral Video Showdown” for all the details. Submit videos to viralvideoshowdown@gmail.com through your Capilano e-mail by November 18th at midnight.

SMUDGING THE BORDERS OF ART AND LIFE Headlines Theatre presents an inspiring, anxiety-inducing production

By Claire McGillivray // Writer

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

“T

he silence in an audience reflects the silence out there,” muses David Diamond, Headlines Theatre Artistic Director. He says this when faced with the glaringly anxious expressions of audience members during the initial tentative minutes of their requested participation in Us and Them. His guilt-driven persuasion eventually convinces a number of audience members to raise their voices and come forward to participate in the production.

Headline’s Us and Them,’ co-directed by David Diamond and Kevin Finnan, is a play that encourages the audience to participate through improvisation when they “understand the struggles that any character is engaged in,” says Diamond. Here they can take the place of the actors and offer up their own solutions to the struggles represented on stage. This play marks the celebration of Headlines Theatre’s 30th Anniversary.

The play digs into delicate and emotionally charged themes of identity, oppression and human interaction. The cast is made up of six diverse community members who were part of a 20-person discussion team and play-building workshop in the summer of 2011. Diamond explains the choice of having six community members take the role of actors as “[they try] to put characters on the stage who have the complexity of real life, who aren’t caricatures.” This brings the honest truth of everyday oppression to the foreground.

Diamond explains his understanding of the audience’s struggle, as well as his theatre’s passion to overcome the internal and external silence. “It’s really challenging to enter a space of

real dialogue, in which we’re suspending judgment about things that we think we know, things that we live in certainty about. Just like in nature, the challenge is for all of us to live in uncertainty and the idea of forum theatre compels us to do that.”

Directors Diamond and Finnan demonstrate creative use of production elements to emphasize upfront feelings of unease, even before the aspect of audience interaction is introduced.

Owen Belton, the music and sound designer, as well as live acoustic guitarist for the show, reflected the tensions of the piece with his musical choices. The audio carried a haunting feeling into the audience, especially during the scene changes where the actors enacted an escalating riot matched to actual recorded visuals of the Vancouver Riot in spring of 2011.

// Lydia Fu Diamond explains how in this day and age “multi-media plays aren’t extraordinary anymore, but this play is combining traditional narrative and visual images in a way that’s very unusual in theatre here in Vancouver.” Other artistic production elements that have a lasting impact include the use of overlapping dialogue delivered by the entire chorus of actors. This dialogue elevates from hurtful whispers to fullon attacks, heightening the audience’s emotions in tandem.

“Inside the forum funny things happen. There’s a lot of laughter because it’s improv. Profound things happen because it’s about us and we are reflected back to ourselves in the theatre,” says Diamond. This aspect of forum theatre can take the play in many different directions, depending on the night. One audacious audience

participant actually asked Diamond if there was anyone else able to facilitate the dialogue, “in the spirit of the play.” Her feelings, as she described to the rest of the audience, were that Diamond was asking his questions, but expecting specific ‘right’ answers, limiting the conversation. He took the comment with grace and comedy but the tsunami of colliding thoughts has been effectively unleashed. Maybe forum theatre is a little more dangerous than it seems or, at the very least, volatile and surprising.

Diamond briefly mentions the inspiration and origins of forum theatre. He links it back to his close friend and professional colleague, Augusto Boal, a contemporary Brazilian thespian and politician. Boal created the concept of forum theatre and founded the Theatre for the Oppressed using art as a vehicle for social change.

Headlines Theatre and Diamond’s Theatre for Living reflects the structure of Boal’s aims but opens up the audience participation. Theatre for Living allows audience members to jump from scene to scene, anywhere they find connections with the characters.

The production is an off-kilter meeting of art and life that is clearly asking people to take a risk; to expose themselves to the discomfort of a raw, uneasy dialogue. Whether this discomfort is effective in breaking boundaries is still uncertain.

The loss of the fourth wall, however, gives the audience more of an urgent sense of responsibility.

As Diamond reiterates, “It’s easy to sit in an audience and go ‘oh, they should have done that!’ It’s very different to step into a situation.”

Us and Them runs almost daily at 8:00 pm from October 21st to November 12th at the Vancouver Eastside Cultural Center, 1895 Venables St. in Vancouver, BC. Tickets are $20 for adults, $15 for students/seniors and $10 for matinees.

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A r ts

MONSTER mash A look back at Halloween parties

By JJ Brewis // Art director

TEEN DAZE / BEAT CONNECTION / TOO HIGH CREW The Electric Owl – Friday, October 28

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ith venues across town, newcomer The Electric Owl proved they were ready to take on Halloween in style.

On Oct. 28, they kicked off the weekend with a trio of artists, Teen Daze, Beat Connection, and Too High Crew, all delivering a killer time.

Electric Owl's dance floor was filled with grooving Black Swans, cowboys, and banana costumes ,and with cobwebs strung through the bathroom stalls, and even the bartenders donning Halloween garb for the evening, all those in attendance all seemed to be enjoying themselves.

The night opened with a bang, as Vancouver’s Teen Daze (one-man, first-name only Jamison) stepped on stage with a cozy looking pom-pom toque and knit cardigan. Fresh off his showcase at New York’s CMJ festival, he returned to the West coast to show his hometown why he has become so revered in the indie electronic circuit. Jamison’s act has seen a surge in praise, with Pitchfork claiming, “Unlike a lot of bedroom blurmongers, Teen Daze seems in total control.”

Now one of Vancouver’s premiere electronic gurus, he seems comfortable head-bopping to his own music in front of a costumed audience; he could easily be mistaken for tinkering away in his bedroom. Yet the songs stand alone, and Teen Daze remains altogether endearing with his bookish glasses and charming stage banter, apologizing to the well made-up crowd for not having a costume. His non-stop set paid more care to ambient sounds, giving a soft edge to the evening’s indulgences.

The next group, Too High Crew, contrasted Teen Daze by appealing to the polar end of the spectrum with a show that was all about energy. The stage was filled to the edge with costumed folk awkwardly fumbling about, while the

Vancouver rap ensemble took to the front. It was often uncertain who was part of the group and who was just there to party. With group members outfitted from cultural touchstones ranging from Cheech, to Twin Peaks’ Log Lady, to the Hamburglar, the campy cornucopia was surely a spectacle to behold. Rapping over top popular R&B and hip-hop beats from today’s top 40, Too High Crew banked on well-known riffs; for example, Rihanna’s “What’s My Name” became a stoner anthem. In fact, all of their songs seemed to be of the same nature, somehow not surprising given the group’s moniker. On the set closer, “PreRolls, Pre-Rolled”, the group rapped in the place of Lil Wayne, repeating the phrase “We blazing, so hazing, this fucking shit’s amazing.”

With long tube fluorescent lights illuminating their setup, Seattle’s Beat Connection capped off the evening with a set of chillwave electronic.

Dressed in matching varsity jackets and thick gold chains like ‘chavs’, a specific look of London street “douchebags”, the group appeared ready to out-Halloween the crowd itself. But only two songs in, the guys had stripped off their heavy layers, right down to costume-appropriate wife beaters and their own homemade Beat Connection shirts. Adding to the heights of their infectious sample and synth heavy tunes, the trio barely engaged with the crowd, aside from thanking the audience periodically, which provoked enthusiastic cheers. The dance floor that grooved to Teen Daze and was perplexed by what to do during Too High Crew seemed to settle into their bear suits and mermaid wigs during Beat Connection, as the entirety of Electric Owl’s pit seemed to become a roving mound of bodies crashing into each other, as Beat Connection closed the night with the group’s biggest hit “In The Water”.

// Shannon Elliott

space was decorated with on-stage pumpkins and a dish of free chocolate bars at the merch table. The crowd was underwhelming in size, but quite receptive, even with local openers Woolworm, who joined in on the Halloween festivities.

As deer-costumed guitarist Alex Pomeroy started telling the crowd a story about how Halloween was an awkward day to move apartments, frontman Giles Roy cut him off, saying "Hey! Any of you ever been this close to a deer before?" and as the small crowd chuckled he said to his bandmate, "I told you it'd get laughs." The conversation in between sets came off as personable, giving their less-accessible, but nonetheless catchy, set some warmth.

Adding a completely different vibe to the evening, Sacramento surf-punk quarter Ganglians took to the stage in a hurry, with lead vocalist Ryan Grubbs shouting out "This is a sad, sad song for all the sad, sad people," which lead into "Drop The Act", the first track from the band's new album Still Life. The set was all over the place, but remained somewhat enjoyable to watch, even if just out of curiosity where they would go next. At one moment, the band appeared to be steeped heavily in Woolworm/Ganglians/Still Corners Wavves-style stoner lo-fi, and the next channelMedia Club – Monday, October 31st ling the Ramones, with Grubbs’ eyes rolling into On Halloween night, another trio of artists hit the the back of his head while the instrumentalists stage, this time at the intimate Media Club. The bounced about, sneering. Despite an overly ag-

gressive snare drum and an overeager set that was unbearably hard to pin down, the group showed potential. The one thread that ran through the entire set was a heavy use of echo effects and reverb, giving the set a surf motif. The group may do well to focus on their strengths: prime harmonies and the bluesy Black Keys-styled tracks such as the slowed-down set closer, with Grubbs repeating, "I don't mind, take your time".

To cap off the evening, London dream-pop quartet Still Corners took to the stage in classic Halloween costumes. Vocalist Tessa Murray was a witch, backed by a motley band including a vampire, a mummy, and a skeleton. Their actual set tended to be on the dreary side; their material from the recent LP Creatures of an Hour all sounded very similar. When Murray really shone was when the band went into perkier, folk territory, slightly transcending the performance. But mainly it was ambient, melancholy tones, with Murray cooing over the atmospheric measures like the lost sister of Lykke Li or Kate Bush.

As the set finished, the crowd seemed to pour out in a quiet, haunting manner, apparently uncharmed. A spooky end to an undoubtedly eerie evening, with Ganglians’ Grubbs asking audience members if they could open their doors to the band for the night.

Happy belated Halloween!

Could we cast an Iron Man? UVic professor’s new book gleans from comics and science

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Although a seemingly unlikely duo, Zehr explains that science and comics complement each other well. He discovered this thanks to his last book on a similar topic, Becoming Batman.

“One of the really unexpected things that came from Becoming Batman was that I took a piece of pop culture and I tried to talk about it [scientifically], but it made its way back into pop culture,” says Zehr. “[Comic book writer] Grant Morrison was writing a Batman run and he was talking about reading my book and how it influenced how he was writing Batman.”

Zehr explains that, in some cases, earlier comics foreshadowed what we have in the real world today: “When I was thinking about brainmachine interface and where we are now, if we go back to early 90s comics, there’s some imagery around brain ports and things that actually look a lot like what we have in real brain-machine interface now … These same kind of connections actually go into real people now, but were thought and written about in Iron Man comics in 1993.”

While the idea of an Iron Man suit is exciting, there would also be many risks.

“It leads into all areas of discussion on rehabilitation – there are probably some negative things could happen to your brain if you were connected to a machine,” says Zehr. “When we think of a superhero like Iron Man and of being connected to the suit to use it, we also have to realize it’s connected to us.”

Zehr notes that part of the book’s purpose is to make readers realize that Iron Man’s armour is not just an article of clothing. “A personal Iron Man suit doesn’t exist currently, but if it did, how could you control it? You wouldn’t be able to use it just like wearing clothing – you would have to actually use it in a direct connection with your body,” says Zehr. “And if, for example, the computer system was hacked, you would also be hacked – not just the suit.”

Zehr believes that the key to scientific advances is that they often change people’s perspectives.

“I think the biggest thing about advances in science is that we get constrained by our paradigms and the normal things we do,” says Zehr. “This [book] kind of helps break those molds a little bit – it makes you think outside of it all.”

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

doesn’t it? UVic neuroscience and kinesiology professor Dr. E. Paul Zehr discusses how it might be entirely possible in his new book, Inventing Iron Man: The Possibility of a Human Machine.

Zehr, whose book came out last month, signed copies of Inventing Iron Man at Curious Comics in Victoria, BC on Oct. 9. The book examines what the under-layers of an Iron Man suit might look like, and how one could be constructed for real-life purposes such as physical rehabilitation after a stroke or spinal cord injury.

Is this a comic book or a scientific proposal?

“I tried to use a pop culture icon as a medium to explore science,” says Zehr. “Because we live in an age of technology, what can we do to try to amplify biology with technology? That’s sort of the theme with Inventing Iron Man. In particular, // Shannon Elliott an area of amplification is the idea of using the brain to control devices.”

By Jenny Boychuk Zehr has a philosophy about education and // The Martlet (University of Victoria) educating the public, which is to use a common ICTORIA (CUP) — Have you ever ground. “There’s a lot of science in here, but I’m thought about the possibility of a real- trying to put it in a way that’s interesting for peolife superhero? Seems impossible, ple,” says Zehr.

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c o l u m ns

EDIT ORS // Samant ha Thompson + Sarah Vit et // e di to r@ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

Popcourt

Living La Vida Lohan

With JJ Brewis // Columnist

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ature or nurture: this debate predates all of us by a good century or so. How much of our behaviour is determined by the laws of science compared to how much of it is instilled in us as young people by those responsible for raising us?

The concept of parenting and the effects of our formative years on the rest of our life remains a great topic of conversation. At a young age, it is up to a child’s parents and family to positively influence them. In our childhood and youth, our parents or guardians are technically only legally responsible for our actions, but it's safe to say that most parents take on a personal commitment to helping shape our ideals, values, and passions.

The same standard should apply to children of celebrities, and to child stars. With the resources at their whim, parenting should be slightly easier among the famous. But often, it comes up short, and the effects of a tumultuous childhood can leave a massive mark on the rest of an individual’s life.

While it may be a common public response to be apathetic or snide to the famous, the truth is that behind the scenes, these vulnerable young people really have it hard. With the advances of the internet and around-the-clock media exposure, a young life can be exposed constantly, removing any sort of childhood away from the individual. Not only are they struggling with the everyday pressures of most young people, such as identity and body issues, but certain problems, such as bullying, are put on the public scale. For most of us, a regular case of high school bullying is regular, for the young and famous, they have to take the heat from people not only in their personal life, but also from the press and public who haven’t even met them personally. The Lohan sisters are a strong example of two people at the receiving end of bullying as an activity that the public feels entitled to.

At the young age of 12, a fresh faced Lindsay Lohan made her big screen debut in Disney's The Parent Trap, impressing audiences with her acting chops. Just a few years later, Lindsay was one of Hollywood's most revered stars, with credits such as Mean Girls impressing critics and fans alike. Sadly, this whirlwind success would quickly unwind, as Lindsay's antics outside of the

// Author illustration studio began to damage her career, reputation, and health.

Before the age of 20, Lindsay had already been in and out of Alcoholics Anonymous, and in 2007 she began her first stint at rehab. Shortly after, Lindsay was arrested for two DUIs, found with cocaine both times, and put under house arrest with a security bracelet to monitor her alcohol levels. The negative exposure following this string of behaviour saw Lindsay kicking off her thenneeded “comeback” film. This type of behaviour has continued through the years, with Lindsay's acting career a fledgling at best, and her public image a sad joke.

Lohan's father, Michael, has been constantly accused of riding on Lindsay’s coattails, but not being a strong influence in her life. Since Lindsay’s prominence in Hollywood, Michael has spent time in prison for assault and has also been the recipient of some nasty DUI charges. Just last week, Michael made press again for a domestic violence altercation with his girlfriend.

Dina, Lindsay’s mother, is hardly a portrait of upright citizenship either. Equally guilty as Michael, Dina has clung onto Lindsay’s fame, doing as much as she can to become a celebrity in her own right, going so far as wrangling her daughter

Ali and son Cody into co-starring with her in a reality series, Living Lohan, in 2008. Responding to Lindsay’s troublesome law and drug streak, Dina let TV show Entertainment Tonight film an exclusive mother-daughter visit in rehab.

When asked about her role in Lindsay’s life, Dina said, “She’s 21 years old. It’s not a blame game.

It’s not my fault, nor her friends’ fault. It’s the personal choices you make.” Perhaps Dina should have been helping her daughter out, rather than clambering for fame herself.

When asked about her parents, Lindsay told Allure Magazine in 2007, “I feel like a second parent in the sense that I helped raise my family … I was put between my mother and father a lot. Well, I would put myself between them to try and keep the peace, and I felt good doing that.” It’s fairly evident that the struggles between Lindsay and her folks were quite a strain. She took the issue into artistic measures when she directed a music video for her own single “Daughter to Father (Confessions of a Broken Heart)”, which showed Lindsay and her real-life younger sister Ali in a broken down home, and actors portraying their arguing parents.

The effects of poor parenting can leave negative issues in many ways. One of the effects is selfesteem and body issues. This summer, Ali herself made a news splash when it was discovered that the young model had undergone major cosmetic surgery on her face. Though mother Dina denies the claims, a simple before and after comparison shows an almost entirely new face. With American laws stating that individuals under 18 are unable to sign off for themselves, this means that one of Ali's parents would have given the treatments the go ahead. Surely, this issue is nothing in comparison to sister Lindsay’s troublesome streak, but for such a young person to go through with this surgery, one has to question why her parents would be signing off on the documents instead of reassuring her that she’s beautiful the way she is.

The Lohans are not alone in their troubles, however. Hollywood has seen several similar cases before them. Looking to other Hollywood starlets who faced disastrous times in their famous youth can give breadth and hope to the Lohan sisters.

Now a 36-year-old producer and star, Drew Barrymore may be the portrait of health and success in today’s celebrity world, but in the earliest times of her young career, Barrymore faced troubles that nearly ended her life before she even hit the double digits. Coming from a long line of movie stars, Barrymore became an international sensation at seven years old as the adorable child star of E.T. By nine, Drew was already a fixture at New York hot spot Studio 54, and in rehab only a few years later. As chronicled in her teen memoir Little Girl Lost, Drew was an alcoholic at age 11, and into heavy drugs such as cocaine by age 13.

Barrymore’s problems are easily linked to terrible relationships with both of her parents.

“My mother [Jade] and I split ways when I was very young and have never really reconciled,” Barrymore told W Magazine in 2009. The two now have no contact, and Drew legally emancipated herself from Jade at 17, stating that her mother was a negative influence in her childhood. Drew’s father John Barrymore was never in the picture to begin with, leaving Jade before Drew’s birth.

It took Drew years to get on track, with several quickie marriages and decades of rebellion in her past. Drew may be finally on steady ground now, but it took her years to get there. Drew could be an inspiration to the young Lohan girls, who are easily on the fence of which way their careers, and lives, will go.

A parent needs to be supportive of their child.

In 2009, when Michael Lohan was asked by People Magazine about Lindsay’s state, he said, “I guess Lindsay is on more drugs than I thought … No wonder why God is taking her entire career away from her.”

Without a strong foundation, it is absolutely no wonder that Lindsay is incapable of getting her life straightened out. Lindsay Lohan may be a public joke, and yes, she is a 24-year-old adult who should be making her own decisions. With such unsteady family foundations, Lindsay suffers from a lack of emotional resources. Each appearance she makes, she is more and more visually deteriorating, and time is of the essence for someone to step in and ensure that she at least lives to see tomorrow.

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

The fallout files

Magical coincidences

With Kevin Murray // Columnist

“All I knew about the word “cyberspace” when I coined it was that it seemed like an effective buzzword. It seemed evocative and essentially meaningless. It was suggestive of something, but had no real semantic meaning, even for me, as I saw it emerge on the page.”

—William Gibson

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f you have been following The Fallout Files then you know that strange coincidences show up in these tales. While some readers may cite statistical probability, dumb luck, and confirmation bias as likely culprits, I beg to differ. Sigmund Freud tried to explain these weird // Jason Jeon events as “uncanny” actions of the unconscious,

while his student Carl Jung took it a step further, naming it “synchronicity”, which suggests that events in our lives are not causally related. Instead, they are grouped by resonance, like the way a plucked bass can vibrate a window pane. Jung was accused of magical thinking, but his theory persisted, and people continue to recognize strange alignments of phenomena. Despite our rational skepticism, sometimes an event strikes a chord, and octaves go off in remarkable directions. Here’s an example: William Gibson coined and popularized the term cyberspace in his seminal novel Neuromancer around a quarter of a century ago, about 15 years before my best friend Stef named ➼

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C o lu m n s People Watching

Liar liar pants on fire

“T

With Heather Welsh // Columnist

hey’re having sex!” a startled guest came running through to the lobby screeching late one evening, “On the sofa, like ew! I just went in there to grab a Twix from the vending machine and there they were, doing it on the pool table!”

Sometimes, drunken travelers seem to forget they are in a public space, and inappropriate behavior is all too common in the hostel.

Sexual intercourse is one of the more extreme unexpected uses of social space, but every week there is a complaint about yet another guest doing something inappropriate. “My roommate was peeing into a bottle last night, he was on the top bunk, and then he dropped the bottle!” Can you imagine being the guy sleeping in the bed below? Another guest came down one morning to complain his roommate had peed in their shared sink – not a very nice place to brush your teeth after it has been given a yellow rinse like that.

The main thing that stems from these events is that whenever a hostel employee speaks to them about the event in question, the culprit denies what happened right in front of the very witnesses who saw them do it.

Neuroscientist Sam Harris writes in his book Lying, “Most forms of private vice and public evil are kindled and sustained by lies. Acts of adultery and other personal betrayals, financial fraud, government corruption – even murder and genocide – generally require an additional moral defect: a willingness to lie.” In Lying, Harris argues that we can radically simplify our lives and improve society by merely telling the truth in situations where others often lie. What seems strange, however, is the situations during which patrons feel compelled to lie.

Most of the best examples have happened to my colleagues who work the night shift, and they have told me about the true gems countless times. From the two guys who tried to bring back a prostitute, to the girls who bring guys back to a shared dorm and act as though they are in their own private love-shack, the events related to sex are countless. Another of the more shocking tales was of a girl showering in a cubical one night when she looked up to see an eye pressed up against the crack in the door! The guy ran away startled, and only having witnessed his eye colour, she was left wondering who it was that

had unfortunately enjoyed his own peep show without facing the consequences.

Most recently, I had the delight of witnessing an older guy creep on girls, making them dinner when they politely refused the first time he asked,

telling them they are beautiful and handing them letters including phrases like, “I think we should get to know each other”, “I was waiting for you”, and “but maybe you don’t like me”. Most of these incidents are followed by a confrontation with a member of staff, and, naturally, a flat out denial by the guest when they realize that their actions could cost them their stay.

It seems that a lot of this behaviour happens when guests are under the influence, as drugs and alcohol affect judgment and make people

out (within reason) and told that they are not welcome to stay at any of our hostels in Canada again, ever. Their name becomes highlighted in our computer system so that if they try to stay with us again, their name flashes up in red, with the notes about what caused them to be banned from the hostel.

One of the best situations was when a boy’s mom dragged him in and demanded to know why her son had been kicked out. I looked down at the computer screen and said quietly under my breath, “He peed in the sink in his room, and used the shared computers for porn.” – Not awkward at all! The second time, a guy was caught sleeping in our library instead of paying for a bed – he explained to me that it was “a mistake,” and in my eyes he was not only denying what he had done was wrong, he was also lying to me in an attempt to stay at the hostel again.

The guests who have some conscience about acting un-civilly obviously have some remorse about their actions, and are embarrassed about their decisions and this causes them to lie. St. Augustine of Hippo divided lies into eight categories, listed in order of descending severity: lies in religious teaching; lies that harm others and help no one; lies that harm others and help someone; lies told for the pleasure of lying; lies told to "please others in smooth discourse"; lies that harm no one and that save someone's life; lies that harm no one and that save someone's "purity"; and lies that harm no one and that help someone.

I believe that most guests’ lies fall into the fifth category, as they wish to “please others in smooth discourse”, because they truly want the staff to believe they are not a wrong-doer. And occasionally, those with ASPD would do so for the pleasure of lying or in loyalty – to defend // Tiare Jung their friend. put it psychological terms, they could have an Whether it be lies, sex in a public space, loopy “Antisocial Personality Disorder”, or ASPD. Ac- guests talking to themselves and making others cording to the American Psychiatric Associa- uncomfortable, theft of facilities, abuse, or vantion ASPD is “a pervasive pattern of disregard for, dalism, and whether the guest was in fact blind and violation of, the rights of others that begins drunk when the incident occurred, they have to in childhood or early adolescence and continues pay for their actions. They might have been pubinto adulthood.” licly humiliated, thrown out, or had to explain However you describe it, there has to be a way themselves to a row of staff struggling to keep a to deal with the people who act this way in a pub- straight face. And when it’s the funnier incidents lic space and cause discomfort or worry to oth- in which no one really gets hurt or too offended, ers. In my hostel, unruly customers are chucked the re-telling of the story is priceless.

➼ his dog “Molly” after a femme fatale in that same tale. Stef and I were discussing this at the Five Point bar on Main Street a few years back.

We had been brought together due to a surprise visit from an old high school buddy, Teeroy, aka “The Chosen One”. He had earned the name for his remarkable fortune: he was raised in a trailer park, spent graduation night on ten hits of acid, and after spending a few grey years as a heavy metal hopeful in a South End apartment, he left the old country of St. John for the bright lights of the Downtown Eastside – to get himself hooked on heroin. When that didn’t pan out, he enrolled in a government sponsored re-training program designed to help get heads off the street.

In little over a year, he was working with computer graphic imaging (CGI) systems in Ottawa and was part owner in one of the highest quality 3D imaging machines in North America. He had just finished processing Keanu Reeve’s head for Neo’s fight scene in The Matrix.

It was a natural segue: Gibson’s Cyberspace

is the Matrix, and so we waxed on into another pitcher, reminiscing about techno, artificial intelligence, and dogs named Molly. That’s when I looked up and noticed that William Gibson himself was sitting in the corner by the window. We all stopped, stunned. A glitch in the matrix had somehow occurred, forming a drunken node of auspicious variables. We ordered more beer.

In the case of our meeting at the Five Point, it cannot be said the any of us caused the coincidence, including Gibson. This would be mistaking Jung’s idea.

An example can be found with the case of scifi author Jack Womack, who, when examining the uncanny similarity between Gibson’s 1984 idea of cyberspace and the modern Internet in 2000, asked, "What if the act of writing it down, in fact, brought it about?" Actually, Jung argued how archetypes emerge from the collective unconscious by apparent accident, in sympathetic coincidence, as if life is following a script that is being written as it happens. The Buddha would

call this interdependent co-arising, but at the time, I just called it spooky.

It gets spookier still. If we explore this idea even further, about two and a half millennia earlier, we find ourselves with Plato’s parable of the cave and his theory of forms. As the story goes, all of humanity is bound in the cave, chained, and forced to watch the lights from a nearby fire as it flickers on the cave wall. We imagine these shadows as the real world, and are doomed to live in the half-light latticework of illusions, while the truth shines behind us. Meanwhile, a strange god called the demiurge tends the fire and guards the cave. If we look at the Gibson coincidence through this lens, then my friends and I may even be illusions ourselves, slaves to some unknowable entity from a different dimension.

Flash forward to the first or second century, and we find this demiurge still active, though it has received an upgrade. Now, it is known by the Gnostics as an archon, or an otherworldly archetype, like an angel, demon, or extraterrestrial,

do things they might not do whilst they are their sober selves. And some of the time, it is to do with a mental disorder the guest may have. Something about their personality may effect they way they react in social situations. To

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

only malevolent. Rather than operating in Gibson’s cyberspace, they bear a closer resemblance to the sentient machines of the Matrix. They feed on the energies of our very souls, prompting us to seek experiences with strong psychic charges, which they consume, like telepathic vampires from another dimension. Or, like the ancient Muses which they resemble, they inspire and fascinate artists, forcing them to channel their strange plans into existence –plans that manifest as books, movies, magic, or coincidence.

It that all were true, then by writing these words, I would be admitting that my agency has been subverted. I would be exposing my agenda and admitting otherworldly intentions. I would also be orienting your awareness to the presence of the archons, as if they desire your attention.

Perhaps I am dancing around a secret, because, as Gibson says: “Secrets … are the very root of cool.” In any case, it would be safer to avoid magical thinking, especially when performing science fiction.

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O p i n i o ns

Edi tor // Marco Ferreira // o pi ni o ns @ c api l ano c o uri e r. c o m

The Navajo are not for Sale Urban Outfitters homogenizes native culture

By Evelyn Cranston // Staff writer

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

F

eathers in hair, wolves on sweatshirts, moccasins on feet: Halloween has passed, and the “poca-hotties” have shed the costumes that depict centuries of abuse, but cultural appropriation of indigenous peoples’ artefacts continues feverishly.

Urban Outfitters (UO) has recently come under fire for their inappropriate marketing of “Navajo” products. The Navajo Nation is the largest federally recognized tribal nation in the United States, with an enrolled membership of 300,000, as of a 2011 census. Their traditional art includes silverwork, turquoise jewellery, and patterned weaving. The patterns used for blankets and rugs are woven with respect to cultural traditions and values, expressing colourful, intricate symmetry to embody the spirit of beauty and harmony. These prints burst with symbolic geometry, and have a history intrinsically linked with the culture of the nation.

Selling over 50 items categorized as Navajo at UO, including “Navajo Hipster Panties”, rips the culture out of the hands of the owners and markets rip-offs to white, rich urbanites. As Adrienne K., author of the blog Native Appropriations reminds us, “The Navajo Nation is a vibrant, real, awesome community doing great things.

They're not some abstract mythical tribe out in the desert.” Not only is UO’s marketing tactic a glaring and offensive example of normalized cultural appropriation, it’s illegal.

According to the Indian Arts and Crafts Act of 1990,”[It is] illegal to offer or display for sale, or sell any art or craft product in a manner that falsely suggests it is Indian produced, an Indian product, or the product of a particular Indian or Indian Tribe or Indian arts and crafts organization.”

The fake Navajo products from UO were made for profit, without involvement from the tribe itself. UO drew reams of criticism online, and the Navajo Nation Attorney General stated, “When an entity attempts to falsely associate its products with the Nation and its products, the Nation does not regard this as benign or trivial.” UO proceeded to scrub their website clean of the use of the word Navajo, and replaced products such as “Navajo Hipster Flask” with “Printed Hipster Flask”, though the product remained unchanged.

While the Navajo Nation Department of Justice found the website revamp to be “more consistent with the corporation's responsibilities than previously demonstrated," the deletion of the offensive words is a saving-face, band-aid solution to a pervasive social problem. The cultural appropriation of indigenous culture remains even after the legal issue is resolved.

The problem may even be intensified, as the products in question now turn into generic “Indian-ish” things, perpetuating the erasure of distinct tribal groups, creating a generic, homogeneous and stereotypical native culture. Adrienne K. states, “Americans are far too obsessed with their commodified and imagined images of ‘the Indian’ to be concerned with true authenticity.”

Anthropologie, UO’s older sister store, sells “Haida” ponchos. The garment is more of an undistinguishable mix of south-western tribal designs than authentic Haida art, and is once again, not produced by the Haida people. This enables UO to profit off the exploitation of another

culture’s sacred symbols, exacerbating the cultural mutilation that First Nations have been subject to since colonization.

Dolly Reno, First Nations Liason with the Capilano Students' Union and member of the Mi’kmaq nation, states, “I think that any when any corporation takes a culture and its values or a symbol of how they identify themselves, as a marketing tool … it shows a lack of consideration and respect for that culture and its beliefs and identity. It sheds a little light on the direction that corporations are going in … I don’t think it shows that they have any respect for anyone except to make money, and that’s a really scary thing.”

“Playing Indian” or dressing up in cultural regalia is not harmless fun and fashion, and cannot be understood without context. It has a history rooted in white dominance, where the Boston Tea Party colonialists dressed in aboriginal drag to construct a new “American” identity that differentiated them from the British, and create a racial binary that justified exploitation. Donning pseudo-indigenous garb is reminiscent of a time where Manifest Destiny ruled, and reminds us that white privilege and dominance still pervades.

As Sasha Houston Brown, member of the

Dakota Santee Sioux Nation, states, “It is this kind of behaviour that perpetuates the stereotype of the ‘white man’s Indian’ and allows for the ongoing commodification of an entire ethnic group.

Just as our traditional homelands were stolen and expropriated without regard, so too has our very cultural identity.”

Wearing clothing or accessories that represent a tribe you don’t belong to is not inherently wrong, though ignoring that the items have a history, and come from a people whose culture has been denigrated, exploited, and oppressed for years is distasteful. Reno states, “There’s going to extremes, and there are certain things that shouldn’t just be used for fashion. But at the same time, I don’t want to cause a division where only I can enjoy my culture and other people can’t share in that experience. If you want to enjoy it, back it up. Where is it coming from? Do you know?”

It wouldn’t be justifiable to be offended if, for example, UO sold a French beret, or a Scottish Kilt, because the ethnic groups in question have not been marginalized to such a degree. It’s a double standard, but one not worth arguing.

Everyone is so inextricably woven into history,

lineage, and background, that no matter how uncomfortable ancestral skin feels, or how pervasive mainstream fashion trends are, we all have a duty to understand historical context and act with respect.

When living in a multicultural and capitalist society, a certain degree of cultural appropriation may be expected, as the structure of capitalism encourages commodification of everything possible. However, stealing distinctive aspects of ethnic groups that have been subject to the grandest theft and invisible genocide for profit further objectifies and marginalizes their people.

When choosing to participate in this trend, the best choice would be to purchase authentic goods from the people whose culture the item represents. Reno states, “If you do buy things that are coming from the people who make them, and it’s not coming from a factory, then I would assume that as a human being, you would be finding some appreciation and you’re learning something. You’re getting something, but you’re giving back.” Wear Aboriginal art and enjoy its beauty and symbolism, but purchase it from the artists themselves, and wear it with appreciation and understanding.

// Shannon Elliott

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opinions

shot for shot Debate: the pros and cons of raising the minimum drinking age

By Jaclyn Lytle and Graham Briggs // The Fulcrum (University of Ottawa) // The Martlet (University of Victoria)

W

ould altering the legal drinking age be a proactive measure in curbing excessive binge drinking among youth? Jaclyn Lytle of the Fulcrum argues that the drinking age should not be altered, while Graham Briggs of the Martlet argues that it should be lowered to 18 in all of Canada.

Throughout Canada, there are a plethora of things a person can do before they can chug back their first legal drink. You can drive, buy porn, and you can even vote in most provinces and all territories before a bartender will permit you to order your preferred poison without having your ID confiscated. That's the way it should be.

Beer, booze, liquor, spirits; call it what you will: alcohol is one substance that is easily enjoyed, but even more effortlessly abused. Blackouts, injury, alcohol poisoning, unprotected sex, increased instances of violence and impaired driving are all known and common consequences of binge drinking, a habit underage drinkers partake in far more often than their of-age counterparts according to the American National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism and Health Canada.

Youth are getting their hands on alcohol whether we like it or not, but that’s no reason to make it any easier for them. Study after study illustrates the incapability of drinkers under 19 to make responsible choices not only about the amount of alcohol they consume, but also about

what they do once they’ve consumed it. Lowering the legal drinking age to the point at which many youth actually start drinking, around 16 years old, would do nothing but exacerbate an already out-of-control issue.

If provincial governments are willing to band together to do something to actually improve the way alcohol is consumed in our country, then their focus should be education, not legalization.

Alcohol is a mind-altering substance with major impairment capabilities, and youth need to understand that. What we need is a consumption education program with updated statistics that reflect the serious alcohol-related consequences of today.

It would be naïve to expect a lowered drinking age to have any positive impact on rates of responsible alcohol consumption. The only thing that is going to influence the nature of youth drinking is giving them the information they need to make knowledgeable choices. Lowering the legal drinking age would be taking the easy way out; putting time and monetary resources into modernizing and standardizing alcohol education is the responsible choice.

— Jaclyn Lytle, the Fulcrum

Eighteen-year-olds can also join the military.

They can be trained to fight and kill in the name of their country; they can be sent to war. In the eyes of the military and the state that commands, 18-year-olds are adults.

Eighteen-year-olds also contribute to the Canada Pension Plan. They are deemed old enough to give part of their earnings to an institution that makes up part of Canada’s social safety net, because one day, they will rely on it. According to one of the basic institutions of our welfare state, Canada’s provinces should follow the lead of 18-year-olds are adults.

Alberta, Manitoba and Quebec and lower the Most importantly, 18-year-olds are tried as legal drinking age to 18. adults in criminal court. When convicted, they Eighteen-year-olds can vote in elections. They are sentenced and punished as adults. In matare deemed old and responsible enough to be ters of justice, crime and punishment, 18-yearaccorded full democratic rights as citizens of a olds are adults. free country, and they are responsible for bearGiven all these serious political, economic, ing the duties and consequences that come with and legal rights and responsibilities, it is astoundthose democratic rights. Politically, 18-year-olds ingly absurd that in most of Canada, 18-year-olds are adults. are not deemed mature enough to legally pur-

// Chris Dedinsky chase and consume alcohol.

Now, there are of course serious dangers related to alcohol consumption; these include drunk driving, addiction, increased risk of serious trauma injury, organ damage from binge drinking and long-term chronic use, and increased risk of a litany of diseases.

Governments should act to dissuade all age groups from drinking, not just young drinkers.

Public education campaigns targeting alcohol, similar to those targeting tobacco and illegal drugs, should be stepped up. Like tobacco packaging, alcohol packaging should include warnings about the serious dangers and health risks that alcohol consumption poses.

If 18-year-olds are old enough to vote, to be tried as adults in criminal court, to contribute to the Canada Pension Plan, to kill and die in war, surely they are old enough to legally purchase and consume alcohol.

— Graham Briggs, the Martlet

Get money get paid //

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

// JJ Brewis

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O p i nions

Inquiries shminquiries Governments shouldn’t be able to investigate themselves

By Gurpreet Kambo // News editor

G

overnment inquiries seem to be all the rage these days – it seems you can’t turn a corner on the information superhighway without running into a missing women’s this, or a G20 that. Should it matter to me, or any other average working person? In theory, yes it should.

Many of these inquiries are a result of mismanagement and incompetence by the government itself or related organizations (such as the police). Often how this ends is in a public outcry for an inquiry into the situation, which is then run by the government – the same body that either committed the wrong, or oversees the body that did.

The problem here is that the government is deciding the scope and terms of reference for an investigation into itself, and it makes one wonder if there is really an incentive to find out the truth. It has largely been established that police investigating police is suspect, and problematic; for example, the Robert Djiekanski taser fiasco severely hurt the public trust in both the police, and public inquiry process, due to the video that appeared to show a clear use of excessive force by the police officers, which they were subsequently cleared of.

However, the issue of government investigating government is not something that received as much commentary, though the problem is the same – why would the government want to make itself look bad? Why would they want to shake the confidence the public has in them if they don’t have to?

The issue is further compounded by the mach-

inations of the political process itself. In a nutshell, an elected official would be very unlikely to implement a real and meaningful inquiry into any scandalous situations that arose during his or her term. The political hamster wheel runs on a four-year cycle (or three-year, for municipal politics), after which politicians need to campaign to get themselves re-elected. If something goes wrong in those years, in the eyes of the public, an elected politician’s head will have to be on the block. In real terms, that means that that elected official or officials shall not be re-elected (or if they are smart they won’t even try). If I’m a good “politician”, I’m going to downplay or shift responsibility for any bad things that happened, and take credit for all the good things. In a situation such as this, what interest would a politician have in exposing the real truth?

Currently, the missing women’s inquiry, chaired by former judge and provincial politician Wally Oppal, is big news, and has been a lightning rod of controversy for quite a while. Most signifigantly, a great many of the advocacy organizations that were involved have withdrawn in protest. This is largely due to the lack of funding that was offered for these groups for legal representation – despite the fact that the provincial government and police will have their own teams of lawyers there.

In this instance, it appears to be sabotage by the government, as the testimony provided by these groups would be shredded by the government’s lawyers without any legal expertise on the other side. Furthermore, the government did not guarantee legal immunity for those testifying, as a result some individuals who may have impor-

tant information will not testify, for fear of being prosecuted.

The inquiry into the Stanley Cup riots in Downtown Vancouver this past spring are also instructive. Certain politicans and media outlets have tried to characterize this as “Roberton’s Riot” – notably, as the municipal election is coming up.

Many people have noted that mayoral candidate and current Councillor Suzanne Anton of the NPA has taken a consistently aggressive stance against Robertson recently, including on the Stanley Cup riot. During the beginning of the inquiry, she insisted that Robertson himself be investigated due to the event being “run out of his office,” to which Robertson replied by calling it “political grandstanding.”

In this case, they are both correct in a sense.

Robertson’s choices in preparation of the event should be questioned (although why this wasn’t entirely obvious is unclear). What is obvious though, is that Anton is grandstanding – and that is the troubling part of this inquiry. Not only is this inquiry prone to the typical political manipulation, it also came before an election, which means all of the issues that are brought to light are going to be spun and manipulated even more than usual.

Furthermore – in what was a mind-boggling revelation – one of the heads of the inquiry, John Furlong, was the CEO of VANOC, the organizing committee of the Vancouver Olympics. In other words, someone who was well-connected among local politicians, worked closely with Liberal Government, and with Robertson – and would appear to be in a conflict of interest

// Miles Chic when examining the decision-making that led to the riots.

Government inquiries should be considered a sacred process that is unimpeachable by politics, in the same way that the court cases or elections are. Just take a look at some other famous inquiries plagued by similar issues – the Warren Commission on JFK’s assassination, the 9/11 commission, the inquiry into the sponsorship scandal. Perhaps the government needs to set up a truly independent body to investigate both government and police, in the way that Elections Canada runs the elections as an independent body from the government – or maybe Elections Canada could be reconfigured to actually be that investigative body for such public inquiries. To change this process from being the sham that it currently is, the elected officials need to take their hands entirely out of it. The inquiry process is meant to restore public trust when it has been broken by public officials – though I’m afraid all it does is make it look like everyone’s in on the conspiracy.

Fighting for a Devolution Ron Paul is longing for the good ol’ days

By Colin Spensley // writer

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

“E

lect Ron Paul, end the Federal Reserve. Elect Ron Paul 2012!” screams the voice of a young man in a YouTube video entitled “Most Powerful Occupy Wall Street Speech”. Ron Paul's name is rampant on social media sites all over the Internet, but does anyone really know much about this socalled superhero of the Republican Party? With media focusing on the now-global Occupy Wall Street (OWS) movement and the impending doom of the Republican Candidates election, Ron Paul is jumping on the bandwagon in order to boost his own public profile.

Ron Paul is a doctor and congressman from Texas whose isolationist ideals and pennypinching economic model has garnered him quite the reputation as “America's #1 defender of individual liberty,” as states his personal website.

He’s cute, kind of like Mr. Rogers with a southern US flare. The media-hyped image of him is only preceded by everyone lack of understanding of who this man is and what he stands for.

Ron Paul's time in congress has gained him the nickname Dr. No due to his strict Constitutionalist convictions. The United States Constitution, on which most of the country’s rules are based, was originally enacted in 1787.

Understandably, some amendments have been made to the original document. Some constitutionalists consider these amendments at fault for swaying the country from the Liberatarian ideals of its founders. Ron Paul is one of these constitutionalists and opposes Amendment 16, which allowed the United States Government to collect a federal income tax. Ending the Federal Reserve, the IRS and abolishing the income tax are three Constitutional amendments (originally implemented in 1913) that Ron Paul wants to reverse.

Ron Paul claims the 55 per cent of the US federal revenue that doesn’t come from income taxation is enough to sustain his version of America.

// Kira Campbell “The idea seems radical, yet in truth, America did just fine without a federal income tax for the first 126 years of its history prior to 1913,” Ron Paul wrote on his website in 2001. Despite a current federal budget a third larger than it was ten years ago, Ron Paul insists in his book End The Fed, it would be possible to run his country with no Income Tax. The heartwarming, patriotically-titled “Liberty Amendment” would see the American government greatly reduce its role in the free market economy.

Ron Paul wants to end the right to abortion and secure American borders using “any means necessary.” Ron Paul claims that between 10 and

20 million illegal immigrants are currently living in the United States and are “being rewarded for breaking the law.” Those rewards would include welfare, jobs, and security. He also seeks to abolish Birth Right Citizenship, which is granted to an illegal immigrant’s child born within the United States borders. On abortion, Ron Paul states, “I am strongly pro-life. I think one of the most disastrous rulings of this century was Roe versus Wade … Abortion leads to euthanasia. I believe that.”

Ron Paul isn’t even up for Presidential election yet, but banners are everywhere. Another republican candidate, ex-NYC mayor Rudy Giuliani, has been called “the war in Iraq’s biggest cheerleader”. He also is an avid supporter of many of George W. Bush’s gut-wrenching policies, such as The Patriot Act and the use of waterboarding on prisoners of war. Compared to Giuliani, Ron Paul looks like the second coming of Christ for the Republican Party.

Ron Paul has run for the Republican Presidential Candidacy before. In 2008 he was nominated and had a somewhat successful campaign with strong grassroots support. He did, however, revoke his candidacy in June 2008, stating that the money being raised for his campaign could be used better elsewhere. And now, in 2012, he has risen again from the ashes; a Mr. Rogers phoenix.

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Caboose F e at u r e d F i c t i o n

Edi tor // KEvin Murray // c abo o s e . c apc o uri e r@ gmai l . c o m

I Squirm (Under the Watchful Eyes of Mark Zuckerberg)

By Colin Spensley // Writer

I

when it’s my birthday. He probably messages them directly and encourages them to write wonderful little messages about how much they love me. New Mark likes all my photos, updates, and notes … at least I like to pretend he does.

I like to pretend a lot of things about New Mark. It’s my way of getting closer to him. I like to imagine we live together in his mansion in Los Angeles. He wakes me up every morning with a naughty romp in his double-king-sized water bed that’s nestled beneath a massive LCD screen.

We watch The Social Network every morning over breakfast and make love in his “Data Collection” room where he keeps tabs on everyone we know.

“Can you believe Natalie Portman has been going all the way to Sunset Boulevard to buy her coke?”

We laugh together and he types fanatically at his gold plated keyboard. We don’t need to eat or sleep or dream or drink. Our love feeds off itself and that’s all we need. He takes me on lavish trips to exotic countries where he dines with royalty who are so fascinated by his genius.

“Mr. Zuckerburg, where on earth did you come up with the idea for Facebook? It’s just so fascinating,” says the Prince of Switzerland as we feast on roasted, endangered mountain goat fondue.

“Oh that silly little thing? Well, to be honest, it was all for her, she was my inspiration…”

Mark looks at me with that sly grin of his. “It was just a way for me to get close to my one true

love … Suzy.”

The prince of Switzerland laughs and Mark leaps to his feet with the agility of a jaguar and drives a steak knife into the prince’s throat.

“No one mocks true love in front of us, we are its last guardians.”

A glimmer of understanding flashes across the Princes eyes and he dies in a pool of his own blood while Mark and I make love on a bear skin rug by the fire.

I keep hearing more and more how Facebook

// Tyler Hughes stores all your messages, data and conversations.

I can only hope that one of these stories reaches my love, New Mark.

“Mark…”

I type it as sensually as I can into that blue and white text box that has become my one-way link to the man I love.

“Do you know I’m out here? Of course you do.

How silly of me to think otherwise. Well, I’m waiting. You know I’m just a ‘SEND’ away. Anytime you want me, just press ‘SEND.’”

// Lydia Fu

// Mike Bastien

// Thomas Ward

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

often lay awake in my bed at night. My air conditioner is broken, so the temperature in my room is usually quite high; the musty smell of the carpet lingers as a haze, adding to an overall feeling of being trapped in of a cell. Those stark white walls don’t help either. I’ve often thought of putting up some pictures: Rock n’ Roll bands, inspirational landscapes with quotes, flags, kittens … anything. It’s so hard to pick something when you don’t really like much of anything.

Books don’t interest me anymore, music just gives me headaches, and friends … well, as you can guess, I don’t have many of those. Food has started to taste like chalk; all of those wonderful meals my family used to share around our old oak table seem like an old black and white film in my mind. I had a boyfriend once but he left me at the bus stop when he enlisted in the Marines.

Ironically, his name was Mark too … Oh? Have I not mentioned Mark yet? Maybe I’ll stop boring you with all the things I don’t like; that seems so dreadful, doesn’t it? I guess basically the pit my life has fallen into contains two things: Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg and the smutty fiction I write about him.

I guess this didn’t really start when Old Mark left me at the bus stop; no, it started long before that, when Mom bought me that PC desktop.

This was around 2007, and I had recently graduated high school with little thought of any future outside of my own personal prison of a social life. Things are so much easier in solitude: no one tells you how weird you are or how crooked your teeth may be. No one leaves you at the corner as you stare off into the sun, the pavement radiating beneath you, in the heat of an unusually warm April afternoon, as an unmarked school bus takes the last glimmer of hope from your life.

But Old Mark was stupid, he didn’t know how to program multi-billion dollar websites.

He didn’t have an incredible film made about his life starring Jesse Eisenberg and Justin Timberlake. No. He never had any of that. Old Mark had a car though; he used to drive me around in it with the windows down in the cool autumn. He’d get a kick out of watching me wrap myself in scarves and coats trying to stay warm.

Old Mark never got cold. Old Mark never cared about anything. My New Mark cares so much about me. He sends me updates straight to my personal email address reminding me that I have the opportunity to attend a Young Christian Youth Community Picnic at one in the afternoon next Saturday. New Mark lets all my old classmates, ex-coworkers, and family members know

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C a b oose

n u g t Sho Reviews!

Childhood toys

Stick Colin Spensley

Koosa Kevin Murray

Shotgun Kevin Murray

Operation Board-game Mike Bastien

I love wooden stick. It’s probably the coolest toy I’ve ever had. It’s rigid, but bendy. My last cool toy was a rock, and before that, a pile of sand, so stick wins hands down; it’s so badass. Stick can do so many things that rock couldn’t do: rock couldn’t be a magic wand, or a butt slapper. Rock couldn’t poke apples down from trees or duel with my stupid neighbor Ronny. Rock was good for smashing, but I kept getting my fingers crushed underneath it and now my hands are covered in scabs.

And don’t even get me started on pile of sand.

Pile of sand was only good when I wanted to kick something into my little sisters face or to make a fake mountain for my insect pets to climb. Other than that it totally sucked. My imagination is so crazy! Stick is everything to me, I’m going to keep it forever and one day when we’re old homeless men I’m going to tie a polka-dotted bandana onto the end of stick and we’re going to hit the dusty road as hobos.

Ahhh Kuddly, my old friend. When you arrived one Christmas morning, I knew I had found a stalwart companion. Remember how we saved the mythical undersea kingdom of Aquatica from the apocalypse? Remember when we lip-synced and air-guitared to Take on Me by A-Ha? Remember how we played doctor with the other stuffed animals, using your cute striped tail as a stethoscope? I am sorry about all the times I chewed on your freaky little lion ears and for making you hump my sister's Koosa Tink. I'm sorry that your neck got all distended because I carried you around by your head, and I'm especially sorry that I gave you away right after I found my father's stack of Penthouse. I made a bad decision there, Kuddly, because it forced me to try and learn to masturbate with a bottle of Head and Shoulders, and that caused more grief than a little dude should have to bear. I miss you, little lion. If you can find your way back home from my mom's house then I promise to treat you better. I'll even let you hump the Head and Shoulders this time, with your cute striped tail of course.

Shotgun belonged to my dad, but I stole it from his closet. I kept it on my windowsill, unloaded of course, just in case some stupid mofo tried to creep up on me at night, like in that movie, The Crying Game. Shotgun had two barrels and I felt like a badass mofo when I played with it. Pow! Blaff! Goozh! Truth is, I never loaded it. Even though I had two shells, I never had the courage to fire the thing because I imagined it backfiring and taking my fool face off, like when Ralphie got that Carbine-Action Red Ryder BB gun for Christmas and actually shot his eye out. Well, I thought that would be my luck. Turns out my experience with Shotgun was formative. I got hooked on Shotgun. Now, all I see is Shotgun.

More Shotgun! If you are reading this, just gimme some Shotgun. I need it so bad. Not like a, “I’m being nostalgic about my youth” kinda bad, but more like “Gimme a Shotgun right now or I’m goin’ back in time to load that mofo on the sill fo’ real.” Send Shotgun to caboose.capcourier@ gmail.com. Please.

I played this game for two hours and I am already a master. I already have ideas on how to improve the science world. Just imagine: If I replace your heart with a gorilla’s, then it would be strong enough that you would never have to worry about a heart attack again! Also, I have created an anti-zombie vaccine – that’s right, from poking around with live wires and metal objects.

Now, you may ask, how can I create a cure for something that doesn’t exist? Operation taught me, and I’m also just that smart. Also, after watching Grey’s Anatomy while randomly fingering the naked Operation man, I realized that surgeons get laid all the time. I started dreaming of taking off my scrubs and wooing a trauma queen with my bed side manners. We could do a little private practise of our own, then go back to my house for a second opinion. Operation. What a game.

I don’t understand why people complain about med school being so hard.

Techno Matrix Puzzle!

the capilano courier | vol. 45 issue 9

// Kevin Murray

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