BIG PROBLEM!
Guess what Tops the Hate-Phrase List by Maggie Hall dio. “It’s a phrase that makes me cringe every time I hear it,” he told me. “Politicians and officials at every level have started using it in press conferences and town hall meetings, from MPD Chief Contee to President Biden. I guess it means ‘Thanks for pitching a slow softball that I can hit out of the park.’ I suppose its use is meant to convey politeness and demon‘No Prob’ Maggie is photo-bombed by fans. Photo: Stephanie Cavanaugh strate humbleness. But to my ears, it’s patronizing and offensive.” hat a response! Who knew A reader, who wanted to stay there are so many people fed anonymous, came up with several bug-bears. Her up with so much bad, irritatmessage read: “When did ‘gift’ become a verb? ing, annoying use of language. When did ‘invite’ become a noun? ‘Unique’ does not In the May edition of The require a modifier. Something is either unique or it Hill Rag I laid out The Phrases I Hate. The piece isn’t. No ‘somewhat’ or ‘very’; not ‘less.’ Just unique.” contained many of the usual suspects (maybe that Barbara Simon, a retired British government phrase should be on the banned list!) such as “no TV producer, living in London (The Rag gets evproblem,” “his/her own home/mother/husband,” erywhere!) e-mailed to say: “A huge annoyance is the “very first” and “you’re welcome.” Readers were use of ‘for free’. Free is a stand-alone adjective meaninvited to join the lingo debate. And did they ever! ing free of charge, at no cost, for nothing. There’s First to respond was one of Washington’s best no need to put ‘for’ in front, which then translates known journalists,Tom Sherwood. His contribution into ‘for for nothing’.” went to the core of the issue. He wrote: “It seems the Another British contributor Joanne Rika (full word ‘affect’ has been obliterated by the use of ‘imexposure here—she’s my niece) came up with: “One pact’.” As examples he gave: “The blazing sun and of my pet hates is when you ask how someone is and heat impacted his thinking abilities; having one too they say ‘I’m good thanks.’ I’m not asking if they’re many doughnuts impacted his weight.” Tom addwell behaved!!” ed that while many might not find the loss of “afAlso from Jolly Olde, David Tattersall, a retired fect” as “cringe-worthy” as he did, he gave a wry ineditor of Moffat, Scotland, wanted it known that “at sight into how it’s affected him. In a final example the end of the day” drives him nuts. Capitol Hill reshe said: “Worrying about the word impact replacident Barbara Rich, a media-consultant for a bioing the word affect has impacted his good humor.” medical research group, nailed the reason why the Then came Larry Janezich, the renowned ednon-stop use of this phrase should cease. While lisitor of Capitol Hill Corner, the news-blog which tening to an interview with a National Republican (along with The Rag) keeps us all up-to-date on all Committee official, she wrote a message. It started the goings-on that impact —oohps! I mean affect — with: “Just heard a woman, representing the RNC, our community. His number one irritant is “thank being interviewed saying ‘at the end of the day’ four you for the question,” the response constantly uttimes. Basically it is never needed, just say what tered by notables being interviewed on TV and ra-
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you mean period. Oops, she said it again, 5x!! in a 3 min segment.” Other words making people despair are: “pop” and “popping.” Nothing to do with popcorn or a soda. All about “pop” it into the oven, “pop” it on the table and “popping” into the shop or round the corner. What happened to “put” and “going”? Then we have “circle-back.” Sounds like a square-dancing call. It’s taken on a ridiculous life of its own because White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki can’t bring herself to use common-sense speech and say: “I’ll get back to you.” As for, “at this moment in time”? What happened to “now”? And don’t get me started on the highly used “so fun” and “very fun”. It’s nothing more than abuse of the spoken word. But —judging by the responses— the number one stop-it-now, mindless, hated utterance is the senseless “no problem,” which I highlighted in the previous article. The total stupidity of its ubiquity is perfectly summed up by Stephanie Cavanaugh (my friend and fellow-writer well known to Hill Rag readers) who sent me the following transcript of an encounter with a “customer service” person. “We were leaving town for a few days and needed to stop home delivery of The New York Times. Finding the website incomprehensible, I phoned customer service. ‘I’m having trouble putting my paper on hold,’ I told a cheerful young woman. ‘No problem,’ she said. ‘When would you like it to stop?’ Friday, I said. ‘No problem!’ she said. ‘When would you like it to restart?’ The following Monday. ‘No problem!’ she said, just as perky as can be. Would you tell whoever about the website glitch, I asked. ‘No problem!’ she said. ‘Is there anything else?’ Yes, I said. Would you please stop saying ‘no problem,’ my ears are beginning to bleed. There was a brief pause . ‘No problem,’ she said. Enough Said! Maggie Hall’s latest book: All Things Dracula: An A-Z of the Count Who Refuses to Die is on sale at Groovy, 321 7th Street, SE ◆
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