Capital 59

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CAPITAL TA L E S O F T H E C I T Y

BREAKING BREAD MARCH 2019

ISSUE 59

STRAIT MATES

$4.90 IN THE HOOD

H U N G O U T TO D RY

The N e ig h bou rs issue


EVERY DAY


Marlborough

BE IN TO WI N! A

ESCA PE FO R T WO * Including return flights for two to Marlborough courtesy of Air New Zealand, return airport transfers with Marlborough Tour Company, two nights’ accommodation at Furneaux Lodge, return water taxi transfers with Beachcomber Cruises to and from Furneaux Lodge and a self-guided wine tour by bike with Explore Marlborough! Enter by 30th March 2019 at www.MarlboroughNZ.com/WIN *Ts and Cs apply.

EVERY DAY


Jim Tannock

treat your taste buds

World class WiNe

Bike high country trails, coastal ridges, deep green forests, tour on long flat runs through vine-clad valleys or one of the region’s many rivers. Marlborough boasts a Great Ride and three Trails along the New Zealand Cycle Trail, Nga Haerenga. A pedaller’s paradise with something for every skill level.

Boasting some of the best seafood and locally grown produce sought by the world’s finest chefs. Indulge in a leisurely lunch at a winery, sample fresh seafood on a cruise or dine at the water’s edge in the Marlborough Sounds.

With a dozen cellar doors within 3km of each other, pedal from spot to spot tasting old favourites and discovering exclusive varietals, while immersed in the very vines they’re grown on. Or, sit back and relax with a guided wine tour by vehicle or bike and grow your knowledge, and palate for these brilliant wines.

hit the track

From the expansive Wither Hills or Richmond Ranges to a multi-day tramp along Queen Charlotte Track in the Marlborough Sounds with mesmerising ridgeline views, lush coastal forest and even luggage transfers; what more could you want.

chase a trail

Explore your options at Marlbor


MariNe PlaygrouNd

Where to stay

Wake up nestled amongst the vines, rich with the hues of autumn, or on the water’s edge in the Marlborough Sounds tucked into a secluded bay. There’s no better way to relax or unwind.

The Marlborough Sounds has 1500km of winding coastline, bays, beaches and native bush trails framed with ridgeline views. A place of sublime natural beauty that needs to be seen to be believed. Grab a kayak or jump in a boat and explore the winding waterways and hidden bays.

FroM Welly

get Wild

Experience wildlife up close and immerse yourself in its natural habitat by paddling in a kayak, cruising on a boat or hitting the trails. Marlborough has a number of predator free, island sanctuaries to explore and plenty of dolphin spotting to do along the way.

roughNZ.com/autumninMarlborough

Take to the skies with AirNZ or Sounds Air and be in Marlborough within 30 minutes, or take your time and enjoy one of the most scenic ferry trips in the world with Interislander or Bluebridge.


At Ryman villages we want our resident experience to be just right Remember when neighbours had time to stop for a chat, cared for each other, and waved a friendly hello in passing? That’s the type of community you’ll find at a Ryman village. Part of putting residents first is ensuring they are connected to caring and vibrant communities. From those first friendly welcomes on move-in day to the friendships that blossom into a community that genuinely cares about each other. It’s all complemented by the village facilities and various activities and outings on offer at Ryman villages. We also appreciate the importance of maintaining those connections with the wider community. Which is why we have five villages in the wider Wellington region. So you can choose which one is the right fit for you.

R Y M A N H E A LT H C A R E

Where community shapes the heart of your retirement Explore our five village communities in the Wellington area 0800 779 626 | www.rymanhealthcare.co.nz


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133 Puruatanga Road, Martinborough. Ph 06 306 9360


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hippopotamus.co.nz Executive Chef Jiwon Do


CAPITAL

Made in Wellington

CAPITAL TA L E S O F T H E C I T Y

BREAKING BREAD MARCH 2019

ISSUE 59

STRAIT MATES

$4.90 IN THE HOOD

H U N G O U T TO D RY

The N e i g h bou r s issue

Aro Street, Aro Valley Photograph by Joram Adams

I

understand that the Fencing Act of 1978 is one of our most consulted acts; nothing seems to stir up neighbours quite like arguments over fencing, and perhaps parking. However on the positive side of neighbours and neighbourliness, there are friendly gatherings and offers of help when it’s needed and it is these more rewarding aspects of the topic that we have looked at in this issue. In my street one rather pleasant facet of neighbourliness is the residents’ regular, brief, informal late Sunday afternoon gatherings on the street, for a drink and chat. Some neighbours and neighbourliness may come and go, but Marlborough is our persistent near neighbour across the water. And the province keeps on adding more appealing strings to its bow. Its pride in recent years has been its superstar role as a wine producing region. Now it’s broadening its appeal to foodies everywhere, showcasing its bountiful seafood, meat, fruit, honey and vegetables alongside the wine, and cleverly integrating them with joyous outdoor activities, making weekend trips hard to resist for Wellingtonians. We have also talked to Cathy Cameron who coordinates neighbourly activities for the region from her Masterton home. Sarah Catherall talks to two Miramar families who have planned their lives and houses around being good neighbours. Transport in the city, particularly light rail, could well be an important local body election issue. We have another opinion on the important factors to weigh up, on page 30. The light rail opinion published in our December issue (Cap #57) has moved a number of you to contact us about it and in this issue, we have published two long letters on the subject. We have revamped our fashion copy; this month we introduce Yoshino Maruyama who kicks off our new format and we also give you an airy look at clothes on the peg. I thank fashion blogger and lawyer, Megan Blenkharne for her regular columns over the past two years. And of course it’s March, and to mark St Patrick’s Day, David Cohen gives us his rather subdued response to the land of his ancestors. All this and much more.

SUBSCRIPTION Subscription rates $77 (inc postage and packaging) 10 issues New Zealand only To subscribe, please email accounts@capitalmag.co.nz

C O N TA C T U S Phone +64 4 385 1426 Email editor@capitalmag.co.nz Website www.capitalmag.co.nz Facebook facebook.com/CapitalMagazineWellington Twitter @CapitalMagWelly Instagram @capitalmag Post Box 9202, Marion Square, Wellington 6141 Deliveries 31–41 Pirie St, Mt Victoria, Wellington, 6011 ISSN 2324-4836 Produced by Capital Publishing Ltd

PRINTED IN WELLINGTON

This publication uses vegetable based inks, and FSC® certified papers produced from responsible sources, manufactured under ISO14001 Environmental Management Systems

Alison Franks Editor

The opinions expressed in this magazine do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher. Although all material is checked for accuracy, no liability is assumed by the publisher for any losses due to the use of material in this magazine. Copyright ©. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form without the prior written permission of Capital Publishing Ltd.

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CONTRIBUTORS

Staff Managing editor Alison Franks

FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

editor@capitalmag.co.nz

Campaign coordinators Haleigh Trower haleigh@capitalmag.co.nz Josephine Gallagher josephine@capitalmag.co.nz Lauren Andersen lauren@capitalmag.co.nz Lauren Edwards laurenedwards@capitalmag.co.nz Lyndsey O'Reilly lyndsey@capitalmag.co.nz General factotum John Bristed

john@capitalmag.co.nz

Art director Shalee Fitzsimmons shalee@capitalmag.co.nz Designer Luke Browne

design@capitalmag.co.nz

Writer Francesca Emms

journalism@capitalmag.co.nz

Editorial assistant Leilani Baker

hello@capitalmag.co.nz

Accounts Tod Harfield

accounts@capitalmag.co.nz

J E A N NA T HOM S O N Writer

DAVID COHEN Journ a li st

Jeanna's passions lie in writing and people and the combining of the two to promote social justice issues. She has travelled many lands, been inspired by different folk and has come back to nest in her native Wellington.

David is a Wellington-based journalist who's written for numerous publications including New York Times, The Guardian and National Business Review. He doubles as an author and has written a range of books including memoirs, anthologies, and a food book.

LU K E B R OW N E D e si g n er

NIKKI & JORDAN SHEARER Fo o d c olum n i st s

Contributors Melody Thomas | Janet Hughes | John Bishop Beth Rose | Oscar Keys | Joelle Thomson Anna Briggs | Charlotte Wilson | Sarah Lang | Bex McGill | Deirdre Tarrant | Craig Beardsworth | Griff Bristed | Dan Poynton Sarah Catherall | Oscar Thomas | Chris Tse Claire Orchard | Sam Hollis | Freya Daly Sadgrove | Brittany Harrison | Emilie Hope

Stockists Pick up your Capital in New World, Countdown and Pak’n’Save supermarkets, Moore Wilson's, Unity Books, Commonsense Organics, Magnetix, City Cards & Mags, Take Note, Whitcoulls, Wellington Airport, Interislander and other discerning region-wide outlets. Ask for Capital magazine by name. Distribution: john@capitalmag.co.nz.

Submissions We welcome freelance art, photo and story submissions. However we cannot reply personally to unsuccessful pitches.

Luke is a Capital designer by day and owner of skateboard brand Daylight, by night. Originally from Hastings, England, he immigrated to Hastings, New Zealand as a wee lad. He now lives in Lyall Bay with his girlfriend and cat Chewy.

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Nikki and Jordan began their cooking journey on MasterChef NZ. Their Kiwi food philosophy is based on sharing, and cooking from the land using local, seasonal produce. As busy mums and businesswomen, they strive to serve up no-fuss meals to feed the whanau.


A curated range of designer ends & mill overruns. 15 Garrett Street Te Aro, Wellington thefabricstore.co.nz @wearethefabricstore

Park Kitchen 6 Park Road, Miramar @parkkitchenmiramar /parkkitchennz 04 388 3030

Daily specials including 3 course set menu for only $45 every Tuesday. Spaces for private functions available.


CONTENTS

12 LETTERS 14 CHATTER 16 NEWS BRIEFS 19 BY THE NUMBERS 20 NEW PRODUCTS 22 TALES OF THE CITY 24 CULTURE

34

M AT E S A C R O S S THE STRAIT Explore Marlborough and meet some of our southern neighbours

30

MAKING LIGHT RAIL Researcher Phil Hayward continues the conversation New feature

36 38 40 42 43

FIGGY PUDDING WILD GAMES SCREWING FRESHNESS SIP 'N' CYCLE FEATURE CALENDAR

44

CUPPA A celebration of the marvelous mug

47 WARDROBE WORTHY Designer Yoshino Maruyama on her fashion finds


CONTENTS

58

68

SHEARERS' TA B L E

CLOSE TO HOME

Chilli cornbread with bacon and maple syrup

Two houses, both alike

49 BUTTERFLY EFFECT

65

DEAR JOHN

52 CLOTHES LINE Fashion forward and flying in the wind

51 56 61 63

BUG ME EDIBLES BY THE BOOK RE-VERSE

76

Simon Hertnon and John Henry Garmonsway's novel approach

74

TENTATIVELY IRISH David Cohen travels to the Emerald Isles

GOOD SPORT

75

BOWL WITH SOUL From pipe dreams to Olympic half pipe

79 WÄ€HINE 81 WELLY ANGEL 82 CALENDAR 84 GROUPIES


LETTERS

In response to the opinion piece, Airport Light Rail, by Stephen Franks (published Cap # 57, p 48) BUSINESS ANALYSIS Stephen Franks rightly assesses light rail as an investment, but it seems nobody has explained to him how the business works, as nearly everything he assumes about light rail is wrong. The caricature he offers is unrecognisable to anyone who has lived in a city with a light rail network. The business model is best described as ‘Netflix for mobility’ – the business may sell the odd single-ride ticket, but what it really does is sell monthly subscriptions for ‘all you can eat’ transport on light rail, buses, trains, ferries, etc. Your subscription rolls over each month until you cancel it. Making the model work means maximizing ridership and maximizing the productivity of the light rail assets. So the core offering is ‘rapid transit’ – frequent, fast service, all day, every day. Contrary to Stephen's assumption, commuters are not the primary target customers; successful rapid transit has to connect people to multiple destinations with all-day demand, like the hospital, shopping areas, education campuses, major suburbs, and the airport, not just serve the city centre. Stephen's hypothetical light rail service ‘moving heavy mostly empty carriages outside peak hours’ is set up to fail. Given Wellington's size and population density, a line along the high-density corridor connecting the railway station, city centre, hospital, Newtown, Kilbirnie, Miramar, and the airport is probably the minimum economically viable product. A line designed primarily to move people between the airport and CBD would be a colossal waste of money. It's a questionable proposition that given a choice, people prefer to travel on their own rather than travel with others, such as on light rail. That's not why we choose to live in cities. We go to concerts, sporting events, universities, pubs and cafés, even shops, for the experiences of being among other people and interacting with them. Transport is no different. If Stephen prefers to travel by himself, perhaps modern urban living is not for him. Contrary to Stephen's assumption, self-driving cars and light rail (also selfdriving by the time Wellington builds it) are complementary rather than in competition. Self-driving cars are an excellent solution to the ‘last mile’ problem – getting people from a light rail station to where they live. Stephen worries that light rail will ‘block other traffic.’ Apparently it's news to him that the professionals who design light rail lines have thought of this, modelled the effects, and tested the models in real life, in many different places. In short, if a high frequency light rail service crosses a busy road, invest in grade separation. For example, in Wellington a light rail line on Taranaki St would cross SH1 and it would be a really good idea to extend the Arras Tunnel west, so the light rail line goes over the top of the highway.

A number of cities have done [light rail] well. If Wellington can replicate their success in a way that's adapted to local conditions, I'm happy for Stephen to call me a light rail zealot. Because the people who start successful businesses are all pretty zealous. Otherwise, their businesses don't succeed. J Rankin, Wellington (abridged) GET IT RIGHT Stephen Franks sees driverless cars as the solution to our transport woes but seems oblivious to the fact that these take up as much road space as conventional cars. Worse still, if they have to travel empty to his door to pick him up, demand on road space will soar. Franks baulks at the cost of light rail, but doesn’t bat an eyelid at the alternative – building more roads through a geographically challenged Wellington. He also clings forlornly to the Public Transport Spine Study, the findings of which have been debunked many times by transport experts, which plainly he is not. But give him his due. Franks does make one good point: Light rail cannot succeed unless it is part of an integrated regional network. We already have an existing heavy rail system – a truncated system that unceremoniously dumps its passengers on the edge of town, often well away from their final destination. It needs to be extended through the CBD, the corridor of greatest demand, all the way to the eastern suburbs, including the airport. The city of Karlsruhe in Germany has a smaller population than the Wellington region, yet it pioneered what was then new technology – light rail vehicles which can also share existing heavy rail infrastructure and travel longer distances at higher speeds than conventional trams. These tram-trains can pick up people from the wider region (like trains) and bring them seamlessly into and through town (like trams). They did this in the early 1990s at about the same time that the Superlink study to extend the Johnsonville line through town was being published. They are now celebrating 25 years of tram-train, while we are still devotedly clinging to our cars, wanting to build spaghetti junctions, ruining the liveability of our city and locking us into an eternal cycle of pumping out more and more greenhouse gases. Transport shapes a city and great transport can make a great city greater. We have to get it right. D Christoforou, Mt Victoria (abridged) We continue this conversation with an opinion piece on Page 30.

Send letters to editor@captalmag.co.nz with the subject line Letters to Ed

12


It’s Neighbours Day – and everyone’s invited! This nationwide event brings people together to build great neighbourhoods, no matter where you live. Celebrate Neighbours Day Aotearoa from 22–31 March by hosting an event, participating in one or joining in at your local community centre. Find out more at wcc.govt.nz/neighboursday or neighboursday.org.nz


RD E R S E C TCI H OA N THT EE A

INK INC.

One Eve r y b o d y needs good neighbours This year the 10th annual Neighbour’s Day Aotearoa will take place. With support from the Mental Health Foundation, Neighbourhood Support, Housing New Zealand and others, related events will be held over March 22–31. The Island Bay Community Centre is hosting a community dinner on Saturday 23 March from 6pm. Residents of the bay are invited to bring a plate of food to share with friends and neighbours. On 29 March Newtownians are invited to Newtown Park to

share a meal and enjoy an evening of games organised by the Newtown Residents Association. The Ngaio Community Picnic boasts stalls, entertainment and games and the Ngaio Crofton Downs Residents Association is encouraging people in the neighbourhood to grab a bite or bring your own picnic to Cummings Park on March 31 between 12 and 3pm. More events were popping up as we went to print, so check out neighboursday. org.nz to find out how your neighbourhood is celebrating.

CAMERON HUNT What led you to getting tattoos? Growing-up all my heroes had tattoos and I always thought they looked nifty. Do you regret any of your tattoos? I don't regret any but I am a completely different person now to who I was at 18 so there are a few I look at and have a good laugh over.

Two Jet lag

Art or rebellion? Art. It's the ultimate process and it never ends.

In a New Zealand first, Wellington Airport now has a hotel with direct access to its airport terminal. The new four-star Wellington Airport hotel, opened last month, features 134 rooms, a bar and a restaurant. Wellington

What do your family think of your tattoos? When I first started getting them they were disappointed but now they are fully supportive and know it's who I am. They understand this is my way of expressing myself.

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Airport CEO Steve Sanderson says it is ideal for travellers who are flying out early or arriving late. The hotel also offers day rates to cater for people with long breaks between connecting flights.


S E C TCIH OANT H ADER TER

F i ve Street stats Figures from the Wellington City Council show that in the last four years 261 apartment units have been built on Victoria Street and around 600 residents have moved in. The apartment block being built on the old Warehouse Stationery site (number 162) will add another 137 units to the area. WCC cordon surveys showed that the average number of

pedestrians walking to the CBD on Victoria Street in the morning peak has more than doubled, from 131 in 2015 to 273 in 2018. The council puts all this down to the Victoria Street Transformation Project, which has been encouraging residential and commercial development and bringing cycle lanes, wider footpaths and trees to the area.

Three Empty nest Four Juvenile whio have left Pūkaha National Wildlife Centre in Masterton to take on the swift currents of Turangi. Born to star breeding pair Jimmy and Jazzy, they are the second clutch of the 2019 season to move on to fast-water training. Whio are ‘torrent ducks’, named for their unusual habitat in fast-flowing water. The endangered blue duck,

pictured on our $10 notes, is considered nationally vulnerable due to loss of habitat and the predation of stoats among others. The Whio Recovery programme sees ducklings hatched and reared at Pūkaha, then sent to Turangi for some practice in fast-flowing water before they are released into strictly monitored zones in the Central North Island.

Six Say cheese It’s even easier to get the perfect selfie now that Kapiti Coast District Council has installed 10 ‘selfie posts’ in some of the parks around the District. A helpful video, How to selfie – With Parks Officer Mark, demonstrates how to use the posts and also

Four

Beer necessities Not sure where to go to grab a golden pale ale, down a dark porter or sip a saison? Never fear, our handy pocket-sized Beer Guide is your (free) ticket to the best brews in town. Look out for it in selected bars and cafes.

suggests some poses such as ‘glam’, ‘the stick’ and the classic ‘blue steel’. The selfie posts are part of the council’s #lovemypark programme. Parks Week 2019 kicks off with Parks to Path, a fun run and walk at Otaraua Park on 9 March.

IT'S COOL TO KORERO E kare, kuhu mai kia kapu tī ai tāua.

15

Hey neighbour (friend), come in and have a cup of tea with me.


NEWS BRIEFS

WHERE WE L AY O U R S C E N E Young thespians are frantically preparing for the Wellington Regional University of Otago Sheilah Winn Shakespeare Festival which is being held (for the 28th time) early next month. Secondary students will present five-and 15-minute scenes from any of Shakespeare’s plays in public performances at Wellington East Girls’ College Hall from 9–11 April. Last year Wellington’s home-schooled Maddie Brooks Gillespie won direct entry into National Shakespeare Schools Production and was selected to go to Shakespeare’s Globe in London in July this year as part of the Young Shakespeare Company 2019.

OU T A N D A B OU T

P L OV E R L OV E R

P E ST- F R E E P E N I N SU L A

Every year Tū Whakahīhī e Te Whanganui-āTara celebrates the LGBTQIA+ community with two weeks full of events, performances and activities organised by groups within the community. This year’s Wellington Pride Festival runs from 8–24 March. It includes the Pride Picnic at the Botanic Gardens on 9 March and Out in the Park on 16 March. Also on 16 March, the Wellington International Pride Parade leaves from Tennyson St at 6pm. The route leads through Courtenay Place to Taranaki Street, finishing outside Mac’s Brew Bar on the waterfront.

The Pūkaha National Wildlife Centre released four tuturuatu (shore plovers) on Motutapu Island last month. Motutapu, in the Hauraki Gulf, is the site of the world’s largest pest eradication programme. There are only around 250 of the critically endangered birds in the world, and Pūkaha just north of Masterton are breeding roughly 10% of the current population. They are hoping to release more tuturuatu juveniles, aiming for 21 birds by the end of March.

Days are numbered for rats, stoats and weasels on Miramar Peninsular as Predator Free Wellington launches their final attack. For the next few months, teams will be going door to door asking residents’ permission to have baits and traps on private property. These will be installed in June and the operations will commence from July. Project Director James Willcocks says, ‘this is likely to be one of the most complex rat and mustelid eradications ever undertaken.’

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NEWS BRIEFS

LAB R E S U LT S Applications for Lightning Lab Tourism are now open. The three-month business acceleration programme aims to build a sustainable innovation ecosystem for the future of tourism in New Zealand. It’s delivered by Wellington’s Creative HQ and supported by Callaghan Innovation and Christchurch International Airport. ‘Previous sector-based Lightning Lab programmes have led to innovative new companies such as Sharesies,’ says Brett Holland of Creative HQ. The focus is on New Zealand's ‘leading edge in visitor experience, tourism tech, and our proactive industry engagement with worldbeating tourism innovation.’ Applications close 1 April.

BU I L D I N G B O OM

O F F T O S C HO O L

ELECTRIFYING

Building consents and applications for new buildings have reached an alltime high in Lower Hutt with Hutt City Council issuing 1500 consents last year. The council had also received 529 resource consent applications, up almost 45% on 2017, many of them for new buildings such as multi-unit dwellings and new housing subdivisions. ‘There have been increases across all areas of development activity particularly planning and building inspections,’ says Helen Oram who heads the consents team.

Zealandia Ecosanctuary has launched a new curriculum-linked teaching resource package for NCEA Biology, called Where have all the takahē gone? It was created by Zealandia’s Education Team in conjunction with the Takahē Recovery Programme and is supported by the Science Learning Hub. The package, which is already in demand, allows teachers around the country to ‘share one of New Zealand’s important conservation stories with confidence.’

Raumati Village had its first electric vehicle (EV) fast charging station installed last month. This is the second of seven new EV chargers planned for the Kāpiti and Horowhenua Districts. Kāpiti Coast District Council Mayor K Gurunathan hopes the chargers will bring more than just electricity to the district ‘Local businesses should see more custom due to EV drivers,’ he says.

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SB EYC TT H IO E NN H UM E AB D EE RR S

Neighbours A neighbourhood has been defined as a social community where considerable face-to-face interaction takes place. When was the last time you knocked on a neighbour’s door for a cup of sugar? I live in Newtown. Last year it was announced that the old Salvation Army church on my street was for sale. It was snapped up by a developer, and in its stead, 50-plus apartments will stand (cheek by jowl some would say). This time next year I’ll be getting a whole host of new neighbours.

A peace of your mind

I may need to invest in a sugarcane company.

72

500

number of hours confiscated property can be kept from your house if it is deemed to have created ‘excessive’ noise by noise control officers.

potential $$ fine if you try to impede the noise control officer from removing said property.

10,000

10.5

3

potential $$$ fine if you are a real dick about it.

number of hours noisy construction work is permitted during the week (7.30am–6.00pm).

number of hours allowed beyond this time for quiet preparation work (6.30 am–7.30am) and reducednoise-level work (6pm–8pm).

According to the Wellington City Council, there are 56 official suburbs in Wellington.

Share and share alike

Owhiro Bay — the most southern.

Things traditionally safe to ask of a neighbour:

Takapu Valley and Tawa could duke it out for most northern.

a cup of sugar

Makara — the most western.

lemons or fruit from other abundantly bearing trees

the loan of tools and equipment for small home improvements

Compiled by Craig Beardsworth 19

Takapu Valley wins again for easternmost but Breaker Bay isn’t far behind.

use of their trampoline

Highbury and Moa Point are the smallest.

their ear for a gossip


NEW PRODUCTS

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10.

4. 9.

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12.

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1. Shorty locker in slate, $269, Shut The Front Door 2. Toou shell arm dining chair, $249, McKenzie & Willis 3. Standard Issue No. 52 black planner, $33, Shut The Front Door 4. Detox water 12 pack, $55, OSOM 5. Grey rattan laundry basket, $100, Trade Aid 6. Moleskine 2 black pencils + sharpener, $25, Gordon Harris 7. Blackfin Ushuaia, $549, McClellan Grimmer Edgar Optometrists 8. Made of Tomorrow daily perpetual planner in forrest, $69, Tea Pea 9. Ethnicraft M rack bookcase, small , $1695, McKenzie & Willis 10. Anoint Skincare aromatherapy soy candle, $25, Made It 11. Frank to-do daily list & notes in stone, $25, Small Acorns 12. Classic tonic syrup 500ml, $16.50, Six Barrel Soda Co.

Powe r point

20


PLANT POWERED BY BURGERFUEL

DON’T MESS WITH VEGETARIANS, THE ANIMALS ARE SAFE, HUMANS NOT SO


22


TA L E S O F T H E C I T Y

L ove t h y neighbour W R I T T E N BY F R A N C E S CA E M M S P H OTO G R A P H BY J O R A M A DA M S

PETS

HOLIDAY

BIRTH PLACE

BAR

FASHION

Dogs (Izzy, Dotty and George)

Wanaka

The Bahamas

Arborist

Country Road

For Cathy Cameron life is all about making connections.

C

athy Cameron likes bringing people together. She’s co-owner of Wellington’s only Speed Dating company, The Choice, and hosts at least one event per month for three age groups. ‘As a previous Wedding Coordinator at Heritage New Zealand’s Old St Pauls’ Church, buying this business seemed to fit,’ she says, ‘Well that’s what I tell our attendees – if their meeting at The Choice Speed Dating results in a wedding, then inviting me as their wedding coordinator would just complete their story perfectly!’ She also works part time as the Neighbourhood Support Coordinator at Connecting Communities Wairarapa and was recently appointed the Wellington representative and board member for Neighbourhood Support New Zealand (NSNZ). ‘I am a community minded person and therefore my move to Neighbourhood Support was a natural one, which I am loving. NSNZ is all about working to make our homes, neighbourhoods and communities a safer, more caring, connected and resilient places to live.’ Cathy moved to New Zealand 13 years ago. ‘Although I have lived in many countries – the Netherlands, Scotland, England, the Bahamas – I would call this home now. My first home was in Hataitai, overlooking Evans Bay. Watching the planes attempting to land in the wind and the dolphins frolicking in the Bay was such a joy! I then moved to Karori where I so enjoyed a complete contrast of scenery, and walking the surrounding hills with the dogs.’ She’s now living in rural

Masterton. ‘I’ve got into gardening and preparing for the winter wood storage. I am beginning to realise the truth in the saying, “moving into the country is not a lifestyle but a life sentence!”’ Cathy enjoys exercise and getting into nature. Her favourite walks take her up Wright’s and Johnston Hills or into the Tararuas. She’s a fan of Botanical artist Sue Wickison ‘for her beautifully painted Kiwi native flora.’ Cathy doesn’t have time to read much these days, but enjoys taking a break with a coffee and a quick code cracker. It is the tenth anniversary of Neighbours Day Aotearoa this month. ‘Neighbours Day is a catalyst for thousands of Kiwis to connect with their neighbours and turn their streets into neighbourhoods, ata whainga te pa harakeke.’ She explains that the whakatauki, or proverb, ‘Atawhaingia te pa harakeke’ speaks to the essence of what Neighbours Day is looking to achieve; to nurture family bonds in the solidarity and unity of community. ‘Atawhaingia is to nurture, protect, cultivate and love. The pa harakeke is the harakeke (flax) grove of the village, used as a metaphor for an intertwined community.’ Cathy is most happy having the house full of visitors, family, neighbours or friends, to look after, feed and entertain. But if there was one thing she desires? ‘I LOVE snow, so to travel, (first class of course), to Lapland, to experience a reindeer sleigh ride and the natural phenomena of the midnight sun and Northern lights, is certainly up there!’

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CULTURE

TO O MUCH CAFFEINE? Seen a ‘street opera’ before? Following the NZ Opera’s mini-opera last year about the first moon landing (pictured), they’ll sing Bach’s15-minute Coffee Cantata three times each day during street festival Cubadupa (30–31 March). Written in the 1730s about the craze for coffee raging in Germany at the time, Coffee Cantata has been translated into English and adapted to modern-day Wellington, as a father warns his daughter against drinking too many lattes. ‘It slightly pokes fun at Wellington’s coffee scene,’ says director Jacqueline Coats. ‘Hannah’s Courtyard is perfect because it’s contained, but festival-goers will stumble on it.’

CURTAIN RAISER

I-SITES

STAR SIGNS

In Owhiro Bay, a converted mechanic’s warehouse and the former panel-beating workshop next door house 20 artist studios. ‘Not many people know about this place,’ says marionettemaker Mary Laine, who has run Nautilus Creative Space for 10 years. Nautilus will hold an ‘open weekend’ Behind The Curtains (16–17 March) during the NZ Fringe. Listen to live music as residents (including a sound artist and a jeweller) host demonstrations and interactiveart experiences in their studios. Hop inside the former mechanical repair shop’s huge vehicle lift.

Photographer Mark Adams has so far snapped half the 38 sites where the Treaty of Waitangi was signed, from Waitangi to Ruapuke Island in Foveaux Strait. ‘Europeans didn’t record the sites, and historians haven’t pinpointed them all, so I’m slowly tracking them down by talking to Māori elders.’ One of his black-and-white photographs is showing at group exhibition ‘Ways of Being: Representation and Photography from The Dowse Collection’ until 28 April.

The NZ Symphony Orchestra’s triple-bill concert The Planets (30 March) features Gustav Holst’s century-old composition of the same name. Its seven movements each portray the ‘astrological character’ of a planet, excluding Earth, including Uranus ‘the magician’. New Zealand’s premier chamber choir Voices New Zealand sings in the last movement, Neptune. Later, US mezzosoprano Susan Graham (pictured) sings the cantata The Death of Cleopatra.


CULTURE

SONGS ON FILM Wellington director David Stubbs’ last film, Belief, was about an exorcism. ‘So after that I wanted to make something lighter: a love story,’ David tells Capital. He’s turned New Zealand musical play Daffodils into a feature film of the same name, to be released 21 March. ‘It’s a drama set to iconic Kiwi songs rather than a musical.’ Maisie – played by singer-songwriter Kimbra – narrates the story of the romance between her Waikato parents, played by Rose McIver (The Lovely Bones) and George Adams. Familiar Kiwi songs provide the soundtrack to many scenes, and Kimbra also sings.

SPIDERWOMAN

NO-CENTS

COMMON GROUND

Beloved children's book The Kuia and The Spider has an old lady and a spider arguing over whose weaving is superior. The book is the basis for Te Kuia Me Te Pūngāwerewere, a show commissioned by Taki Rua Productions for the Capital E National Arts Festival for children. Wellington actor/producer Jamie McCaskill performs it in te reo Māori, ‘translating’ it through movement and gestures. ‘The kuia becomes a spider. I read the book as a kid, so it’s nostalgic.’

For 20 years, Pātaka Art+Museum in Porirua has charged about 50 cents (most recently, $1) for each child in school groups that participate in its education programmes. But Pātaka recently made this service free. Will scrapping the $1 fee ($1.50–$2.00 for schools outside Porirua) make an actual difference? ‘Yes, if you’re a single mum of four,’ says Pātaka education manager Kawika Aipa. ‘It’s about equity of access to education.’ Students also now travel there and back, free of charge, on a city-council bus.

New Zealand Portrait Gallery exhibition ‘Edith and George: In Our Sea of Islands’ (21 February to 25 May) displays Edith Amituanai’s largescale photographic portraits of South Auckland youth (one is pictured). They were inspired by – and are displayed alongside – photographs of young Cook Islanders by George Robson Crummer (1868–1953). The exhibition marks 250 years since the first encounters between Europeans and Pacific peoples.


CULTURE

Road trip to Whanganui?

German Pianist Michael Endres

CubaDupa

Thanks to new principal sponsor pattillo, this year the Whanganui Arts Review is bigger and better than ever. An increased Open Award prize purse plus the chance to be the first recipient of the pattillo project, has created huge interest and an exhibition which showcases the region’s eclectic artistic output.

Returning to NZ from Oslo, Michael Endres’ first performance will include Schubert’s “Gasteiner” Sonata in D Major, Ravel’s Jeux D’eau, Gershwin Song Transcriptions. His performances are described as “calculating risk-taking”. Extensive prizewinning discography of 29 CD’s. Diarise future concerts on May 26, June 23, July 21, August 11.

New Zealand’s largest street festival CubaDupa is back for it’s fifth year running, celebrating arts and culture in the heart of downtown Wellington. Bringing artist and performers from around the globe to play alongside our local and national talent, transforming the streets for two days of FREE festival shenanigans.

9 March–12 May Sarjeant on the Quay, 38 Taupo Quay, Whanganui. sarjeant.org.nz/arts-review

Sunday March 10 at 2.30pm Raumati South Hall, 7 Tennis Court Rd, 5032. mulledwineconcerts.com

March 30th & 31st Cuba Precinct, Wellington. cubadupa.co.nz

The Witch Project

New Zealand Fringe Festival

Crows Feet Dance Collective marks its 20th anniversary with The Witch Project - an exploration of how women have been depicted as witches throughout the ages & even today. They canvas this history in provocative, challenging and amusing dances that celebrate the strength of women.

New Zealand Fringe Festival is set for another record-breaking year in 2019, with hundreds of talented multi-media, visual, comic, theatrical and musical artists from all over the world, set to take over the Wellington region in March. Ensure the 29th annual Fringe Arts Festival is where you need to be.

Each month the planetarium dome at Space Place is transformed into a movie theatre featuring classic Sci-fi movies selected by AroVideo.

March 10 Ngā Purapura, Otaki. March 23/24 Soundings Theatre Te Papa, Wellington. janbolwell.com

1–23 March Level 1, 40 Taranaki St, Wellington. fringe.co.nz

Sunday 31 March, 7pm Space Place, Carter Observatory, 40 Salamanca Rd, Kelburn. museumswellington.org.nz

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Movies under the Dome

In March, The Fly (1986) is showing, starring Jeff Goldblum as an eccentric scientist that accidentally transforms into a giant fly. Whoops. $15.


Wellington Sat, 30 Mar, 7.30pm Michael Fowler Centre

The Planets Edo de Waart Conductor

Susan Graham Mezzo-soprano Voices New Zealand Chamber Choir Anna Clyne Abstractions: II, III, IV Berlioz La Mort de Cléopâtre, (The Death of Cleopatra) Holst The Planets, Op. 32

Book at nzso.co.nz PRINCIPAL PARTNERS

GALLERIES

W W W. A R T Z O N E . C O . N Z

EXHIBITIONS

ARTICLES

IN ASSOCIATION WITH


CULTURE

Shakespeare lives!

Tuatara Open Late

See students from throughout the region bring Shakespeare into today’s world of issues and relationships through their performances of 5- and 15- minute scintillating scenes at the Wellington Regional University of Otago Sheilah Winn Shakespeare Festival. Enjoy fresh takes on the Bard, and the fusions of cultures and art forms.

Art, music, film, books, beer, wine, food. This month, four thinkers—including artist Peter Robinson and composer Samuel Holloway—offer perspectives on Yona Lee’s work. City Gallery Book Club returns with 2019’s guest host, Pip Adam, and Chris Tse, Megan Dunn, and Stephen Epstein. Orchestra of Spheres performs live. Entry by donation.

9,10,11 April 7.00pm Wellington East Girls’ College Hall Paterson St, Mt Victoria sgcnz.org.nz

Thursday 7 March, 5–10pm Te Ngākau Civic Square, Wellington. citygallery.org.nz

Art Attack ArtZone is a quality publication that stimulates the imagination and invigorates the creative. Offering a comprehensive coverage of New Zealand’s art world – it’s an ongoing exhibition in every issue. For artists, collectors, enthusiasts and gallery frequenters ArtZone is the perfect choice.

A years subscription to ArtZone is only $30.50 artzone.co.nz/subscribe


RATHKEALE COLLEGE

WELCOME HOME Surrounded by bush-clad hills, access to major transport links, skilled locals and some of the region’s most stable industrial land, it’s no wonder businesses are taking off in Upper Hutt. Home to data centres, food manufacturers, medical engineers, logistics services and so many more –all with good reason to base their operations here at the top of the Hutt Valley. Economic stimulus packages are available to encourage business growth. Talk to us about how we can support your new or expanding business to find the right home. Contact our Economic Development Manager – Stuart Grant today. e: stuart.grant@uhcc.govt.nz ph: 027 803 0620

Upper Hutt –Business is Booming

Campus Day

Sunday 24 March, 11am Rathkeale College is a State-Integrated Boys’ Boarding and Day Secondary School catering for Years 9-13. We are extremely proud of all we have to offer so invite you and your family to come and have a look for yourselves. Staff and students will be on hand to help you explore our 123 acres of outdoors, take an eco walk down to the river, try the confidence courses, check out our bike track and see what is happening in Agri-Business with our developing Land Lab. There will also be a chance to view our excellent boarding facilities. In an age where parents are often referring to their “screenager”, we believe we offer the best of both worlds in developing confident, successful and happy young men. Martin O’Grady, Principal. COME AND SEE WHAT RATHKEALE COLLEGE HAS TO OFFER.

To register or for more information please email principal@rathkeale.school.nz or phone 06 370 0175


F E AT U R E

Ma king l ig ht ra i l

Light rail is a contentious issue in Wellington. Some see it as the solution to all our traffic trauma, while others warn it will not deliver us to our destinations. Back in December we published an opinion piece questioning the enthusiasm for light rail in the capital city, to which we received some interesting feedback (see Letters, page 12). Here, we have asked researcher and ‘concerned citizen’, Philip Hayward to offer his perspective on the proposed push for light rail through Wellington.

W

hy is the answer for Wellington’s transport issues, ‘light rail’? Has the original question been logically framed? Advocacy rests on several main points. First, light rail has more ridership capacity which makes it the solution for a choke point or urban travel ‘spine’ in which buses are suffering from congestion. The full picture of costly failures elsewhere tells us why this is the wrong focus. It is all very well to add capacity through a choke point or along a spine. But travellers still have to get to and from the ends of the light rail service. Wellington has the learning experience right now, that the bus system has been altered to a ‘spine and feeder’ model, from the previous ‘grid of routes’ model. Riders are not happy. If light rail is to be the solution, the spine and feeder model needs to work, not fail. The wrong assumption is that the vast potential capacity of a light rail line automatically becomes ‘the new public transport ridership’. The obvious reason for ridership constantly falling short of projections is that the entire system of feeder buses plus light rail spine was not as attractive after all.

Looking at our own situation, buses on a spine and feeder model have quickly proven to be slower than the previous model. This is the reality everywhere, whether the spine is served by light rail or buses. It is very difficult to avoid the accumulation of lost time when transfers between services are necessary. The reported longer trip times, of a few minutes, are quite typical, not a temporary teething problem. The solution to this problem might be a lot more buses and a lot more frequent feeder services. In our local experiment so far, we are attempting to save money by using fewer buses than before. It is not certain whether a greatly increased frequency of service would have its substantially higher costs ameliorated by a spectacular increase in patronage. But this would be essential if there was to be any point in a substantial increase in capacity on the spine. Another problem we need to confront is that a light rail route via Newtown and over the top of the hill will most likely add more minutes to the trip, not save them, compared to the status quo of buses going through Mt Victoria by tunnel. The motor bus had advantages that our leaders of the past regarded as self-evident. The

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SECTION HEADER

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OPINION

sheer flexibility, without the need to spend money on rails and control-system capital – buses could simply use the same surfaces as all road vehicles; and new routes could be created without any need for transfers, with the same bus taking riders from the urban fringes to the high-demand destinations. It would be logical to ask exactly how good a bus-based system could be if instead of cutting our spending on it, we were prepared to spend the billions that light rail is assumed to be ‘worth’. If it is possible to run light rail ‘along the waterfront’, isn’t running a whole lot of buses that way in addition to the Golden Mile route, a logical solution? There are numerous clever options available for speeding up bus services, which need not cost anywhere near as much as a light rail ‘patch’ onto the system which would result in most ‘whole trips’ taking longer! For example, the ‘bus congestion’ problem on the Golden Mile is exacerbated by ‘within city’ travel. A logical solution would be ‘city spine buses’ dedicated to Railway-Stationto-Courtenay-Place services; these buses could be articulated, multi-door, and have cleverlydesigned time-saving bus stops that at least match

these advantages of light rail, without the considerable additional costs of rails and control-system capital. The original services travelling further in either direction (i.e. to the suburbs) should have a minimum fare to dissuade ‘within city’ riders from using them and crowding out the longerdistance riders. Furthermore, if light rail can be made faster by costly dedicated corridors, so can buses. A second standard argument for light rail is that operating costs are lower. But this is negated by the higher capital costs unless the mythical situation occurs where the very high potential capacity is realised. And the capital cost burden is blown out completely if dedicated tunnels and grade separation are added. A third standard argument is ‘real estate development’ and ‘property values’ which for Wellington, are now claimed to rescue the Benefit-Cost Ratio from its currently-analysed 0.05! But objectively, the ‘numbers of riders’ and the purposes of their trips is all that counts. If property values rose and development occurred along a light rail route, why would it not have also occurred with an improved bus service that carried at least as many riders? There are unfortunately few exam-

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OPINION

ples of bus-system high-capacity spines, but the most famous one of Curitiba, Brazil, certainly involved abundant redevelopment on the route. Lastly, a popular argument is that ‘everyone else is doing it’. But it seems the same mistaken assumptions about light rail spine capacity, omitting the feeder-service considerations, are a plague in the world of ‘professional’ consultancy and analysis – and no-one is being held accountable. Bent Flyvberg et al in a series of studies, show that the average cost over-run of these projects around the world is around 100%. Failure to achieve ridership projections is the norm. These authors coin the terms ‘optimism bias’ and ‘strategic misrepresentation’ to describe what is going on. This is really part of the growing contemporary problem with unaccountable elites and political ‘swamps’. A further argument specific to Wellington is that light rail is ultimately intended to go all the way to the airport. Doing this, we will be assured, will resolve the fiscal disaster that Stage One will have proven to be meanwhile. But the complexities and costs of getting rails into an airport campus, compared to buses, is another whole can of worms that our swamp’s experts are

waving away. Wellington airport with its notorious lack of space, would be especially problematic, not a candidate for one of the world’s most cost-effective systems. While our own advocates assure us that Wellington’s light rail will be one of the rare successes, we should remember that they all said that. Our planners and consultants can have all the fancy mathematical models and formulas the world can offer, but if logic is not guiding the inputs, what comes out is garbage, and if used as a basis for policy, the outcomes are all bad.

Lower Hutt resident Philip Hayward is a concerned citizen who does a lot of research and reading, particularly in urban economics and transport economics. Phil also participates in several online discussion forums and has a small but growing output of published opinion pieces, essays and fully peer-reviewed papers.

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F E AT U R E

Mates a cross the Stra it The plains of Marlborough have always been bountiful. Apples, peaches, apricots, asparagus, cherries, garlic, figs, corn, peas, strawberries, and kiwifruit all grew prolifically. Sheep, beef cattle, and deer grazed the dry hillsides, so there was always a ready supply of meat for the barbecue. But then Marlborough’s zesty aromatic Sauvignon Blanc rose to international fame. Suddenly the world couldn’t get enough of it, and paddocks, crops, gardens, and orchards gave way to vineyards. But now the provenance of food matters, as the millennial generation seeks to ensure the produce it is consuming is responsibly produced. Chefs are demanding that the fare they offer is sourced locally, and Marlborough is rising to the challenge; a core of dedicated producers are again showcasing locally grown fruit and vegetables, and even locally hunted wild game. High quality fruit and vegetables are grown in more and more fields, the number of roadside stalls is swelling, and the regular Sunday farmer’s market showcases diverse produce including nuts, goat’s cheese, olive oil, free-range eggs, berries, stone fruit and vegetables. May’s Feast Marlborough celebrates the land and the food chain – from hunters and gatherers, farmers and growers, to chefs and food lovers . Brenda Webb talked to two Marlborough producers who believe firmly in provenance.

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F E AT U R E

Figgy pudd ing

E

mily Hope smiles as she strolls through the family’s Old Road Estate fig and feijoa orchard on the outskirts of Blenheim, five-month-old Louie happily perched in her front pack. ‘This is where we are all happiest,’ she says, looking around the immaculately maintained orchard. ‘My two-and-a-half-year-old adores running around here and we bring Mum out here in her wheelchair.’ And it’s where she takes local chefs and buyers for the fresh figs she grows and sells. ‘Chefs want to meet us, see the land and see where the food is coming from – it’s all about provenance – people are so much more interested in where their food comes from these days.’ Emily says people buy locally so they can talk to the grower about the food they are buying. Old Road Estate figs and feijoas are sold throughout the country and also at their roadside stall on Old Renwick Road in Blenheim. ‘I remember as a child we’d drive around Marlborough with our spare change and stop to buy corn and asparagus at roadsides stalls. I like the idea that people are going back to basics and we want to be part of that movement, hence the roadside stall.’ The stalls are flourishing as producers realise the public, like so many chefs, want to buy food as close as possible to its source. Emily sees this as part of a reaction away from consumerism, people increasingly buying just what they need, often direct from the grower. Their orchard produces several varieties of figs including Brown Turkey, Robin, and Cape White. Their delicate flesh and distinctive flavour is highly prized by chefs. But the same delicate flesh can cause headaches for Emily as figs have a very short shelf-life – just two to three days. Each fig must be handpicked and carefully placed in a small bucket so they don’t get crushed. They are taken to the cool room, and hand graded and sorted before being sent promptly to market.

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While they are a difficult fruit to deal with, with lower returns than other crops including grapes, Emily wouldn’t have it any other way. ‘We wear our hearts on our sleeves when it comes to our figs,’ she says. Emily grew up on the family property and feels fortunate her parents were passionate about trees. Dad Kevin took cuttings of heritage trees and never stopped planting and the property today sports masses of specimen and fruit trees and more than 1000 figs and feijoas as well as citrus and a large vegetable garden. At last year’s Feast Marlborough Emily showcased her figs selling them with other local goat’s cheese, olive oil and walnuts. After 12 years away from Marlborough, studying nutrition in Dunedin then working in Italy and Auckland, Emily returned home five years ago to help on the family farm. It runs sheep and cattle and Sauvignon Blanc grapes as well as the orchard. It was a bittersweet homecoming as in 2016 her mum Lynda, who had run the sales arm of the family business for 10 years, suffered a ruptured brain aneurysm that resulted in a stroke. Emily took on responsibility for the orchard which has now become a passion. When she was living in Auckland her parents would send up figs and feijoas for Emily to sell at markets and she quickly realised their potential. As a nutritionist she has a vested interest in the benefits of eating fresh seasonal produce, and she is pleased to see people taking a more old-school approach to food. ‘People are really interested in where and how their food is grown. I also think people want to eat local produce and of course those who do are supporting the local economy. We always support those cafes and restaurants that use our produce.’ Emily has her hands full right now with a young baby and a toddler, but says she has ‘loads’ of ideas for the future. This season their figs will be sold in compostable containers as the orchard does its bit towards reducing plastic.


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F E AT U R E

Wi ld games

M

arlborough high-country farmer Darren Clifford knew that the wild animals running on his Avon Valley block had potential. In a province where food and wine had always been valued, he realised that he was in a position to capitalise. ‘We’ve got this renewable resource right here,’ he says. ‘Wild venison is such an amazing meat, it’s lean, it hasn’t been drenched, it’s completely natural and it fits that model that people now want – to know where their food comes from. The same goes for rabbit, hare, and goat – goat is a fantastic meat and restaurants increasingly want it.’ Local supplier Premium Game fitted his philosophy perfectly and so Darren, with his brother Nick, bought the company, which supplies high-quality wild venison, goat, rabbit, pork, and hare all around the country. ‘I feel strongly that every family in New Zealand should have the opportunity to taste these wild meats.’ A growing client list includes high-end stores and restaurants including Moore Wilson's and Logan Brown, along with home cooks who want to add leaner and tastier meat to their repertoire. More than 60 MPI-certified hunters supply meat to Premium Game, including Darren and Nick who are themselves keen hunters. Animals supplied to Premium Game are checked by a meat inspector to ensure they are healthy and suitable to enter the human food supply chain, before being professionally butchered. The bulk of the hunting is done on private land with the landowners’ permission and the species taken are seen as pests detrimental to the farm or to the native environment. Most hunters have a long-term relationship with farmers. Conservation is key, and both Premium Game and hunters seek to ensure the resource is not depleted. For Darren the company fits perfectly with his vision of Marlborough, as a gourmet food destination, not just a wine region. ‘Sure, it’s the viticulture that is bringing people in here, but they are seeing what we have to offer and we have chefs using and promoting local produce,’ he says. ‘We have such a massive opportunity in Marlborough to build a story from the land up – letting people know exactly where their produce is coming from by connecting them with the land or, as in the case of Cloudy Bay

Clams, with the sea.’ Darren grew up in Marlborough and remembers his mother buying produce from roadside stalls. ‘There was one we went to in Muller Road and we’d grab the produce off the back of the tractor as it was driving in,’ he says. At 18 he found himself with ‘absolutely nothing’, and, determined to make something of his life, worked as an apprentice apiarist before taking up truck driving to help fulfil his aim of starting his own honey business. Over the years, it morphed into the very successful Taylor Pass Honey, benefiting from the mānuka honey wave. Then he sold the company to realise his lifetime ambition by buying a farm. Darren has a passion for the province and for food, and loves building businesses and teams of people. He also has an eye for opportunity and runs a hunting lodge on his Avon Valley farm, and a corporate retreat in hunting downtime. In the past 10 years he’s been astonished at the variety and quality of products becoming available in Marlborough and of the food in its cafes and restaurants. ‘There is just so much wonderful produce on offer in Marlborough – lamb, rabbit, venison, goat cheese, black garlic, clams – and they all have such a cool story. I get really excited when I see the direction Marlborough is heading as a world-class food and wine destination.’ The revival of roadside stalls delights him and he applauds smaller producers who are using land for crops other than grapes. ‘I think we are going to see smaller areas not suited for grapes being used for production of niche crops,’ he says. ‘I believe there is a real opportunity for people to build food businesses that sit nicely amongst the vineyards.’ Darren has seen a shift in recent years in the way people, particularly younger people, perceive food. They don’t want it over-packaged or over-processed, and provenance is important – they want to know where the food was produced and the story behind it. ‘People are far more aware and discerning about what they put down their throats and of course it always tastes better if you know the story about where it came from and the sustainability of the product and how it was treated and packaged,’ he says.

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F E AT U R E

Screwing freshness Joelle Thomson's ode to the screwcap, pioneered by Marlborough winemakers.

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here has been a steady improvement in wine quality since screwcaps were launched in Marlborough in August 2001. The event was an inauspicious start to a radical change in wine packaging. A group of determined winemakers invited a handful of wine writers to a draughty hall and gave us a run-down on the science of wine aging, followed by a tasting of wines under screwcap and cork. In many cases, the same wines were sealed with both closures. There was no comparison. Everything under screwcap tasted fresh, including older wines. Everything under cork tasted dull and dusty. This was confirmed by my experience as a wine writer and judge. Back then, Marlborough was the biggest wine region in New Zealand, with 4,561 hectares of grapes (the national total was 15,800 hectares) and 64 wineries. Nearly half the region’s winemakers were members of the New Zealand Screwcap Initiative. They were tired of corked wine, random oxidation, and other faults due to poor-quality cork. Today, Marlborough remains the biggest wine region, with 26,000 hectares of a total 37,900 and 141 wineries. Its adoption of screwcaps has spread so that approximately 97 per cent of New Zealand wine is now sealed this way. And Marlborough’s dominance is mostly due to one grape variety and one wine style – Sauvignon Blanc. Clean, fresh, fruity and consistent, Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc is a product of its hot days (strong fruity flavours), cool nights (refreshing acidity) and straightforward winemaking (cool temperature-controlled fermentation and little to no oak). It’s a successful recipe. Sauvignon Blanc now accounts for over 85 per cent of New Zealand wine exports. A lot of eggs in one basket, particularly now that wine is the fifthlargest earning export industry in this country. First of all, the quality of Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc is consistent, due to the cool temperature

fermentation, which retains the grape’s powerful fruity flavours. Avoiding the time and expense needed for oak aging, most Sauvignon Blanc is easy to drink when it is still youthful, while Chardonnays and reds which are aged in oak can take longer to mellow. The straightforward production keeps costs down for producers and consumers, while resulting in a drink that tastes accessible as soon as it’s bottled. Screwcaps provided the X factor.They ensure the wines will taste fresh, will stay fresh for up to a week when opened, and will be easy to take and open anywhere. It’s not all about Marlborough but this region has had the biggest influence in bringing others into the screwcap fold. The style of its wines just happened to suit a closure that would retain their distinctive fresh character. Then winemakers began to realise that screwcaps would preserve the freshness and consistency of their other wines too. Gone are cork taint, random oxidation (resulting in flat, dull tasting wines) and the pronounced tinned-pea aromas of many aged New Zealand whites. High quality, consistency, and age worthiness are the expectation of the majority of New Zealand wines today. Marlborough winemaking has many more strings to its bow, mostly white and mostly yet to become mainstream. The region’s strongest suits are fresh highly aromatic whites such as Albarino, Gewurztraminer, Riesling and even Pinot Gris. The Chardonnays and Chenin Blancs of Marlborough are also emerging as good quality wines, often at modest prices – usually sealed with screwcaps. John Forrest who also provides the region’s well known Graperide was one of the first to make screwcaps his preferred method of wine closure. He has never looked back. Wine has benefited immeasurably from this method of closure and our collective drinking experience is all the better for it.

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Sip ‘n’ cycle W R I TT E N BY L E I L A N I BA K E R

L

iz Monrad can’t wait to be knee-deep in grapes. This month she joins thousands of others in the South Island’s biggest one-day cycle event, Marlborough’s Forrest Graperide. Once over the finish line, competitors are invited to hop into an oak vat which holds three and a half tonnes of grapes. The grapes are crushed and made into wine, which is gifted to riders in the next year’s event. ‘The following year you go back to Graperide and you get your bottle of wine that was made from it which is pretty cool,’ Liz says. She starts at 4:30am to fit cycling in with work and family time. The Upper Hutt resident, who works for the New Zealand Transport Agency, will be completing the 101km ride for the second time. For Liz, Graperide is more than the race itself. It’s about the camping, seeing friends and their families, and the wine and food of course. ‘It’s totally random but it’s a unique event. It’s not like other rides where you go and do it and there’s a prize giving and that’s end of it,’ she says. The track takes cyclists through the vines of the Wairau plain to the port of Picton, through part of the Marlborough Sounds and Havelock, then finishes at Forrest Estate winery in Renwick.

Cycling is a family affair for the Monrads. Liz’s two kids and husband attend all her events. ‘We love doing it together. They come and support and take part in the kids events.’ More recently Liz has been introduced to a new challenge – triathlons. She has completed three halfiron-mans, and is about to embark on her first full iron-man in Taupō just three weeks before Graperide. ‘I really enjoy the combination of the three disciplines, but cycling is my happy place.’

Forrest Graperide For the 15th annual Forrest Graperide cycling event participants choose whether to hussle through a 200km circuit or cruise a scenic 40km. A highlight for ‘virgin riders’ is the grape crush, a chance to get in an oak vat and crush three and a half tonnes of grapes which will be made into the wine gifted to riders in the 2020 event. 30 March, 6am onwards, Forrest Estate Winery

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F E AT U R E C A L E N DA R

V i n eya r d Half The Vineyard Half-marathon makes participants work for their brew. Heading off-road, entrants are invited to race through 21 privately owned vineyards including Cloudy Bay, Wairau River, and Saint Clair Family Estate. Taking

H a ve l o c k M u s s e l a n d S e a fo o d Fe st i va l Home to the green-lipped mussel, Havelock hosts a renowned Seafood Festival. The one-day event includes live music from reggae legends Katchafire, market stalls,

and cooking demonstrations from kiwi chefs Annabel Langbein, Chris Fortune, and Paulie Hooton. 16 March, 10am–6pm, Havelock Domain.

in views of the Richmond Ranges, Wairau river, and autumnal vines, it’s a famuosly scenic half-marathon. But the main selling point for entrants is the bottle of award-winning wine each participant receives once the race is over. 11 May 9am–3pm, Saint Clair Family Estate Vineyard.

Ye a l a n d s C l a s s i c F i g hte r s A i r s h ow A family-friendly event which provides entertainment in the air and on the ground, with three days of local food and merchandise stalls, classic cars, and over 100 display aircraft. Beginning with an official practice day on Easter Friday, it ends with a sunset Twilight Extreme Show topped off with fireworks on Easter Sunday. 19–21 April, The Omaka Aviation Heritage Centre.

Classic Kiwi Picnic

Feast Marlboroug h

Chefs Bradley Hornby and Liz Buttimore of Arbour restaurant have crafted a traditional Kiwi menu for the event, complemented by Dog Point wines. 2 March, 12–5pm, Dog Point Vineyard. And if you miss that, International Sauvignon Blanc Day will be celebrated on 3 May in Marlborough, to celebrate the drop that the region is famous for.

If you consider yourself a foodie, this four-day adventure is for you. Feast Marlborough runs May 9–13, showcasing the region’s best-kept culinary secrets. Live entertainment will feature alongside stalls of epic local dishes at Bayleys Friday Night Feast street party. If you can’t make it that weekend,

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never fear! In conjunction with Feast Marlborough, signature dishes celebrating Marlborough’s food culture can be tasted at participating eateries throughout April and May in the inagural Rare Fare competition. Feast Marlborough, 9–13 May Rare Fare, 15 April–19 May at participating restaurants.


C u p pa Boil the jug, unleash the cameo cremes and invite the neighbour over for a gas bag and a cuppa.

2. 3.

1.

5. 6. 4.

7.

1. Mystery Creek Ceramics mug, $40, Made It 2. Grey ceramic teacup, $15, Trade Aid 3. Katherine Smyth ramekin black and white, $21, Small Acorns 4. Duralex picardie glass tumbler, $6, Shut The Front Door 5. Green lotus teacup, $15, Trade Aid 6. Toshi mug in jade, $17, Shut The Front Door 7. Hasami porcelain clay teapot and milk pitcher, $88, California Home & Garden.

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INTERIOR

8. 9.

13. 10. 12. 11.

8. Toshi mug in white smoke, $17, Shut The Front Door 9. Melanie Drewery tulip cup, $25.50, Made It 10. Mystery Creek Ceramics tea cup, $32, Made It 11. Mystery Creek Ceramics Nerikomi mug, $40, Made It 12. Katherine Smyth ramekin licorice, $19, Small Acorns 13. Hasami porcelain clay mug, $42, California Home & Garden.

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oshino Maruyama is a New Zealand-born Japanese fashion designer. She's interested in culture and sustainability with many of her pieces being influenced by her indirect relationship with her Japanese heritage. By day she's junior assistant designer at Kowtow and by night, produces her own designs. You can check out her garments at yoshinomaruyama.com

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Calfskin Tabi boots, $1,500, Maison Margiela

Otsu Kagerou Hat, $225, The Service Depot

Describe your style in five words… Considered colour palette, oversized elements. Your favourite piece in your wardrobe is… A charcoal winter coat I made for myself. What would you never be caught wearing? A bodycon dress. Most prominent colour in your wardrobe? Green If you could raid anyone’s closet, who would it be? Illustrator, Jenny Walton or designer, Ena Matsumoto. What items do you always gravitate toward when shopping? Accessories. Bags, shoes and earrings. Less or more? Less.

Such a beautiful effortless dress. The panels in the front and the silhouette look very flattering. Gracey Dress, $440, Mina

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F E AT U R E

Butter fly effect What exactly is Mahuki? Jeanna Thomson looks into the world’s first culture-tech accelerator programme.

I

magine you are cocooned in an egg chair. In front of you is the most exquisite butterfly you’ve ever seen, with a luminescent blue body and sparkly, fine gold wings. It flutters gracefully around you. You reach out to touch it and it balances delicately on your hand. This is just one of the many digital technologies being developed by the teams at the Mahuki innovation accelerator hub. Mahuki began in 2016 at Te Papa to fast-track digital technology for the GLAM (galleries, libraries,

archives and museums) sectors. Mahuki means ‘to perceive things differently’ – or, more poetically, ‘a wellspring of inspiration’. Although similar programmes exist overseas, Mahuki is the world’s first accelerator programme specific to the ‘culture and heritage’ sector. Wellingtonian Emily Loughnan and her team Curio (2016 intake) went on to sell their interactive package Curio Publisher, developed during their time in Mahuki. Emily nearly missed out on Mahuki. ‘I was standing at the

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F E AT U R E

wharf in Wellington, when James (one of the Curio team) rang and said “We’ve only got a day to put this application form in.” Eleventh hour, much?’ Emily suggested. ‘What if we made a piece of technology that allows museums to make their artefacts come to life?’ Curio is an online publishing platform that lets museums, galleries, and libraries make their own digital interactives, without needing an external expert. It’s perfectly suited to creating object-based interactives, typically presented on a touchscreen. All you need is an object, and some stories to tell about it that will fascinate your visitor. Emily says, ‘It puts the power of storytelling back into the hands of the people that work in museums.’ Take the impressive Waharoa carving at the gateway to Te Papa's marae, for example. Waharoa is the most photographed artefact in the museum. However, the snap-happy visitor often has no idea of the rich stories that are chiselled into the carving. An ancestral figure sits on top of the upper arch of the gate itself, upon which other ancestral figures are carved below. The figure at the bottom of the gate has his legs wide apart in a warrior’s stance. Using the Curio package on a touch screen,

you can zoom in on any part of the carving and hear an audio story about it. The narrator is a descendent of the original carver so you’re getting an authentic storytelling experience. Zooming in on the figure’s open legs, the virtual narrator says, ‘you can see where they chiselled his manhood off ’, then he cracks up. It’s as if the person is talking directly to you, telling you detailed stories, punctuated with hearty laughter. Seven museums are now using Curio Publisher. Curio is currently working on a nature exhibition opening in Te Papa this year. In Singapore, they are developing a multiscreen for a mosaic-like wall of rich stories. Close to three quarters of teams who have gone through Mahuki have gone on to commercial success, which speaks to the quality of the programme. The butterfly described above was created by JIX (joyful, immersive experience), a Christchurch-based team of four from the 2018 intake. Via a virtual reality headset, the 3D butterfly is guided by your gaze. JIX are developing virtual-reality technology to create an experience that allows visitors to feel as if they are touching objects in the collection –no more ‘do not touch’.

稀攀戀爀愀渀漀

伀戀椀 伀戀椀 䈀氀愀挀欀

䔀甀瀀栀漀爀椀愀 䰀攀洀漀渀 吀爀攀攀

䌀栀漀挀漀氀愀琀 䴀攀最愀渀 匀愀氀洀漀渀

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BUG ME

Huhu beetle Name: Huhu beetle

remains is a thin outer shell of timber. All these holes mean bacteria and fungi can get in too, helping to accelerate the breakdown of old stumps and debris.

Māori name: Huhu, tunga haere or tunga rākau in larval form. Pepe te muimui in adult form.

Look/listen: Many will be familiar with the loud whirr of the huhu beetle in flight, often just before it crashes into a window or else, terrifyingly if you don’t know what's going on, gets tangled in your hair. March is probably the last month to spot them before they disappear again until November, so keep an eye out or turn a light on at night and see if one appears. A lot of people are freaked out by huhu beetles but there’s really no reason to be – while they can use their mandibles to bite they are unlikely to do so unless provoked. As kids when one got stuck in the house we’d just pick it up gently by its antennae and take it outside, but if that's too much just open the door and turn an outside light on – they'll inevitably head towards it.

Scientific name: Prionoplus reticularis Status: Endemic Description: The huhu beetle is the largest endemic beetle in New Zealand. It is a member of the longhorn beetle family Cerambycidae, which are characterised by very long antennae – often as long as or longer than the beetle’s body. Huhu beetle larvae (huhu grubs) hatch from eggs deposited under bark or in rotten wood crevices, living for two to three years in the cavities they eat into the wood before beginning a 25-day pupal stage, and then emerging as flying, fully formed adult beetles. After this point the adult beetles do not eat, living for roughly two weeks before the life cycle (hopefully) begins again.

Tell me a story: Huhu grubs are a traditional food for Māori, who would eat them raw. Their lives were sometimes saved by the grubs when they were lost in the bush. Moreporks eat the beetles, as do mice, pigs and hedgehogs, and kiwi dig about for the grubs. The children's book Kuwi’s Huhu Hunt by Kat Merewether, about a kiwi trying to find suitable kai for her hungry baby, is an adorable story featuring a bunch of very cute huhu grubs.

Habitat: Huhu beetles are found all over New Zealand, from the coast to the tree line 1400 metres above sea level, in dense forests and leafy suburbs. Because the larvae feed on dead wood they are an important part of the ecosystem, with several generations of larvae often growing themselves in the same bit of timber, expanding their increasingly intricate tunnel network until all that

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SECTION HEADER

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EDIBLES

POT TERS’ B E N E VOL E NC E Ceramics to Supper is a one-off event on March 10 in support of Women’s Refuge. Diners are invited to choose a bowl designed by one of New Zealand’s top ceramicists and then eat out of it, before taking the bowl home. Robertta Young, sous chef at Shepherd, is designing the menu. For more information visit www.ceramicsforsupper.com

DEEP CLEAN

BURGERS ON THE RUN

TOO RUDE TO PRINT

Using only natural products is, for good reason, very fashionable right now. Iconic Wellington cocktail establishment Havana Bar has taken the ideology to the next level. They’ve created their own sanitiser, using left over citrus fruit from the bar and kitchen. It is combined with vinegar and water then left to sit for a month. It is great for the environment, besides being cheaper than synthetic chemical cleansers and smelling fantastic. You’ll have to head in to give it a sniff.

The man behind Egmont St Eatery, The Catering Studio and Sterling has opened a new spot, Rogue Burger on The Terrace. Simon Pepping said he saw an opportunity in the scarcity of burger offerings in the area. At 101 The Terrace in the ground floor of the Park Hotel, it is open from 12 to 2pm and 5 to 7pm. The burgers are marketed as simple, but high-quality. A single-patty cheese burger with house-made pickle goes for $14.00.

Formerly Five Boroughs, which went into liquidation leaving employees and creditors disgruntled, the site at 2 Roxburgh St has a chequered history. It is under new ownership and is now called ‘El Culo Del Mundo’ Spanish for ‘the back of beyond’ or more literally ‘the arsehole of the world’. It seems the new owners have turned things around as they’re receiving some good reviews. The menu is distinctly Latin-inspired but also includes Otago grasshoppers!

Village corner, Eastbourne


EDIBLES

CUBERB SUPERB For the fifth year Cubadupa returns for the last weekend of March. Cubadupa is Australasia’s largest free multi-arts festival. Restaurant specialities will be available all weekend at the Moore-Wilsons-sponsored Food Fest, with more than 50 outlets and offerings such as Logan Brown’s iconic Paua Fritters. The wide range of performances will include theatre, circus, street and music. The Phoenix Foundation is one of the headlining music acts.

BETTER FOOD, TOGETHER

GOT YA TO GS?

HIGHEST ORDER

Local food is good for the environment and builds local economies and community resilience while reducing waste, says the Wellington City Council website. The WCC is supporting Local Food Week, 22-31 March, which coincides with ‘Neighbours’ Day’ which is promoted nationwide in an effort to bring communities together. Events during the week can be found on the WCC website.

Well known Wellington barista Tait Burge bought the old Memphis Belle, and late last month opened his new cafe under the moniker ‘Swimsuit’ after he only had a 20-day turnaround. Tait says that ‘jumping in the deep end’ and purchasing the site was the obvious next step in his hospitality career. Swimsuit has been designed as a ‘friendly, tonguein-cheek’ environment, where top quality products are served.

Just off Vivian St on Dunlop Tce you can find a small yellow caravan from which ‘Plant Blazed’ foods are served. It is rapidly gaining a reputation for some of the best vegan food in Wellington. They serve plant-based hot dogs, burgers and a variety of salads and extras. Their meat substitute, called seitan, is made of a wheat protein. They also have a tofu alternative for those who are gluten free. Check out their logo and the name will make perfect sense.

Correction: Last month we enthused about Miss Fortune, Petone’s Seashore Cabaret Café’s new offshoot in Gracefield. Only we called Seashore Cabaret something else. Sorry guys.

Did AnYone here order A truckloAd of hops? Our latest release, arriving at a supermarket or bottle store near you.

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S H E A R E R S ' TA B L E

Chilli cornbread with bacon and maple syrup BY N I K K I & J O R DA N S H E A R E R

A

lmost like a cake or scone, cornbread is an awesome way to enjoy the juicy sweet corn abundant this summer season. This version is a jump away from the traditional Native American versions. It’s one way to use the fresh produce that is taking over our gardens at this time of the year - seriously, we have zucchinis coming out of our ears and as well as giving them away by the bag, we have now taken to grating and freezing for later use. Plus this

INGREDIENTS

2 fresh corn cobs, husked and kernels shaved off with a sharp knife 2 spring onions, thinly sliced 1 zucchini, grated and excess water squeezed out 1 red chilli, seeds removed and finely diced 1 cup all-purpose flour 1 tsp baking powder ½ tsp baking soda ½ tsp cayenne pepper 1 tsp ground cumin 1 Tbsp brown sugar salt and pepper 2 large eggs 250g sour cream Topping: ½ red onion, sliced handful grated cheddar cheese 50g chilli feta 1 Tbsp nigella seeds extra chilli if you like things hot To serve: 8–10 sage leaves 12 rashers streaky bacon maple syrup

cornbread is the perfect thing to whip up to take to neighbourhood gatherings or to serve to unexpected guests at any time of the day, as it works well for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Try it with; bacon & maple syrup, with smoked salmon and creme fraiche, slathered in butter or served as an accompaniment to barbecued roast chicken. Serve hot, straight from the oven, warm or at room temperature. Serves 6–8

METHOD

1.

Preheat oven to 200°C. Grease a 300 x 200mm baking dish and line bottom with baking paper. 2. Dry-roast corn kernels in a hot pan for 4–5 minutes until starting to brown. 3. Combine all the vegetables in a bowl. 4. Into a separate bowl sift the flour, baking powder and baking soda. Add the spices, sugar and seasoning. 5. In a small bowl whisk together the eggs and sour cream, season with salt and pepper. 6. Mix the sour cream mixture into the dry ingredients and then fold through the vegetables. 7. Pour into the prepared baking dish. Cover the surface with sliced onion, cheddar and feta. 8. Sprinkle with the nigella seeds and extra chilli if you want it hot. 9. Bake at 200°C for 40–45 minutes until golden or skewer comes out clean. 10. While the cornbread is cooking cook the bacon strips until crispy. Wrap in tinfoil to keep warm. 11. Shallow fry the sage leaves for about 30 seconds until crispy. Drain on paper towels. 12. To serve, cut the cornbread into portions, top with bacon and sage leaves and drizzle with maple syrup – or your choice of toppings.

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BY THE BOOK

IN PERSON We hear about online ‘bookstores’ sucking up sales, but plenty of us are still browsing brick-and-mortar bookshops. In the past year, industry association Booksellers NZ gained eight new members, to reach 192 physical bookstores. The total includes Schrödinger's Books in Petone, which opens this month. Another newbie is Another Chapter, opened opposite Wellington Hospital in November by longtime nurse Lorna Bingham. ‘I wanted it to be a nice place for hospital staff to browse books without needing to go into town.’ In the US, indie bookshops’ sales increased by 5% over 2018.

CAP’S LOCK

SHAKY HANDS

PRIME READING

Wellington’s claim to be New Zealand’s literary capital has been strengthened by the Ockham NZ Book Awards longlist, with local writers locking down exactly half of the 40 spots. Last year Capital correctly picked Kate Duignan’s novel The New Ships as a fiction finalist. We’ve profiled long-listed novelists Rajorshi Chakraborti and Tina Makereti, and covered books by Fiona Kidman (Fiction), Chessie Henry (General Non-Fiction) and Bronwyn Holloway-Smith (Illustrated Non-Fiction).

Set in Wellington Hospital, Carl Shuker’s excellent fourth novel A Mistake (VUP, $30) focuses on overtired, stressed hospital staff and some unfortunate consequences. Why the medical setting? Well, Carl was an editor at the British Medical Journal for seven years, and Principal Adviser, Publications at Health Quality & Safety Commission NZ. We’re picking it now: an Ockham NZ Book Awards contender next year. Shuker is married to novelist Anna Smaill.

Yes, Jacinda Ardern makes time to read – and not just cabinet papers (Cap #58). She talks about her love of books – and the importance of literature and reading – at a fund-raising event for Katherine Mansfield House & Garden (Samuel Marsden Collegiate School, 13 March). Proceeds will help the Mansfield museum fund educational programmes and resources for school groups, following the house’s scheduled redevelopment this year. Tickets are $55, including bubbly and canapes.


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SEB CY T I TOHNE HBEOAODKE R

Re-verse

8 WAY S O F L O O K I N G AT M Y S C H O O L L I F E

1 Oh Tanya, please can you come back to school on Monday? I love your work.

I N T R O D U C E D BY C L A I R E O R C H A R D

The poet: Keizo Preece is twelve years old. Originally from Wellington Hospital, he now lives in Mount Victoria. He likes writing because ‘you can write whatever you want – there are no limits.’ Although he loves maths, Keizo would prefer to stay home and play with his cat Stitch than go to school. He hopes in the future to publish a book called Keizo’s Poems. Why I like it: My father-in-law (who is, coincidentally, living proof you can be 86) refers to my poems as little stories. This is how he reconciles the fact they don’t rhyme with his conviction, installed in primary school, that poems should rhyme. He is not alone in this belief. Primary school students often tell me they like poetry because it rhymes, but that poetry is difficult to write for the same reason. So, when I encountered this poem, I fell hard for the way it emphatically embraced this little stories school of poetry. Its originality sparkles in the specificity of the details noticed: the whiteboard calendar outside the office, and within this the way the months change ‘on Wednesday’; the brown SRA cards, of which there are ‘probably 12’; the thread of regret at having taken Leroy’s advice at the pool. Here are the internal workings, the planned and unplanned learnings, the occasional enigmas, of the school day. I appreciated the assurance that ‘67 is a nice age’; as I head in that direction, I’ll be doing my best to walk ‘at the perfect speed’ and to let those around me know more often how much I love their work. Best quotable lines: I missed free time / yesterday. Next week / will be different. Best moment to break out this poem: A friend’s 67th birthday pool party. Best insider knowledge: Tanya is a Learning Support Assistant in the poet’s classroom and an absolute legend. Read more like this: At Toitoi, an outstanding journal of exciting new writing and visual art by young creatives aged 5-13 from across the nation. Their recently released hardback collection, The Jillion, is stunning https://www.toitoi.nz Claire Orchard is the author of poetry collection Cold Water Cure. She also works at a primary school, where she enjoys scouting for new writing talent. You can find links to her work at claireorchardpoet.com

2 Oh fractions, please can you tell me why I love maths so much? I wish that maths was 3/5 of the school day. 3 By the school office, on the whiteboard calendar: 11 weeks of fun. But why is there no swimming for 2 weeks? 4 February will become March on Wednesday. It’s the same day that January became February 5 I’ve done 4, 5, 6 and 8 of the brown SRA cards. How many SRA cards are there? Probably 12. 6 In the free time pool, there are two ways to get out: the ramp and the side of the pool. Mr Hutton said, “Get out,” but Leroy said, “You can stay in.” I missed free time yesterday. Next week will be different. 7 67 is a nice age but can you be 86? Maybe the oldest people are 99. 8 Most people walk to school. I walk to school at the perfect speed. by Keizo Preece, originally published in Toitoi 13 (2018)

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BY THE BOOK

Dear John W R I T T E N BY SA R A H L A N G P H OTO G R A P H BY J E RO E N T E N B E RG E

Why come out as gay after your death? Sarah Lang talks to author Simon Hertnon about his friend John, who was prepared to come out only when their co-written novel did.

J

ohn Henry Garmonsway was a private, formal man. He never came out as gay during his lifetime (1928 to 2018), half of which was spent in Wellington. Now that John’s not here to tell the story, his long-time friend Simon Hertnon is confident he can represent John accurately as a person and as joint author. (We’ll get to their novel shortly.) Simon tells us that John, one of 15 children, grew up near Raetihi, then at age 14 moved to Wellington, where he immersed himself in culture and music. For over a decade he ran Church Stores, a Wellington business that supplied churches with bibles, hymn books, and the like. When he was 33 John moved to London where he spent 30-odd years as managing director of the bookselling division at A R Mowbray & Co, a publisher specialising in religious books, until he retired. John had some partners, just quietly, when he was young, but none who lasted into later life.

Soon after retiring, John was introduced to Simon, a 23-year-old New Zealander new to London. They enjoyed each other’s company and shared cultural interests and an unexpected, intense friendship unfolded. It’s not the obvious story. Yes, John had romantic feelings for his young friend, but Simon is straight and romance was ‘off the table’. Simon worked out his friend was gay well before John (with trepidation) finally told him. ‘It just wasn’t an issue for me,’ Simon says. ‘But I knew it was complicated for him, so I was grateful John didn’t decide that being friends was too difficult.’ Coming out was not an option for much of John’s earlier life. ‘It was too difficult,’ Simon says. ‘John had a position of responsibility at work, and homosexuality was illegal in England until John was nearly 40. After that, it still wasn’t okay socially.’ His Christian belief complicated the issue; and, by the time homosexuality was widely accepted, John felt it was too late to come out – and perhaps unnecessary.

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BY THE BOOK

‘Straight people don’t “come out” so why should anyone have to?’ ‘But I never once got the sense he was in any way embarrassed or ashamed about being gay – he accepted it and knew it was natural. I don’t think any of those close to him cared whether he was gay or not – I’m sure most of them assumed he was.’ A year into their friendship, Simon set out to follow the common advice to ‘write what you know’. He suggested to John that they collaborate on a novel based on their friendship. ‘John said no. Then he said yes, once I convinced him that the story’s power would be in its authenticity.’ They wrote alternate chapters – Simon led, John followed – each from the point of view of one of the two principal characters. The characters’ autobiographical origins are pretty obvious. Daniel, a straight 23-year-old photojournalist recovering from a heartbreak, moves from New Zealand to London and visits his friend’s uncle Julian, a retired publisher. The pair become close – and Julian develops feelings for Daniel. The real-life friends decided back then that, upon publication, they would be open about Julian being based on John. ‘John was prepared to come out 25 years ago, but only for a work of art.’ In 1994, a UK literary agent took the novel on. But publishers said no thanks. ‘It was a hard sell: a NZ/UK, gay/straight debut novel that was too long.’ Although Simon halved the word count, the project was put on the backburner. Simon spent two-and-a-half years in London before returning to New Zealand. He and John stayed in close contact, visiting each other occasionally. In his 70s, John returned to Wellington, as he’d always planned, and became deeply involved in The Royal School of Church Music New Zealand. Meanwhile, Simon was busy with his career in Auckland as a business-writing consultant, non-fiction author, lecturer, husband, and father to twin girls (now 17). Since 2008, Simon has flown to Wellington regularly to teach business writing at Victoria University, and to do consultancy work, and to see his family and John. From 2015 to 2018, he extended his spells in Wellington to help care for John as he became frail. Simon wanted to publish the novel before John died. He edited it heavily, and ran all changes past John until they were both happy. They agreed to use the pen-name William Henry, compounded from their middle names. Last year, Simon placed an advance copy of The Julian Calendar in John’s hands, 11 days before he died, aged 89. ‘He beamed. He was content. It was

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cathartic for him. He wrote things in that book that he’s never said to anybody.’ The novel, which also touches on the men’s sexual relationships with others, is primarily about the sundry and shifting natures of love: platonic, familial, sexual, etcetera. ‘It’s about love as fuel. The form it comes in doesn’t matter.’ In Wellington, Unity Books, and several others now stock the novel, also available online. Choosing not to approach New Zealand publishers, Simon is doing what most would call self-publishing – he calls it ‘boutique publishing’ – through his own publishing company under the imprint Marsilio Press, seeking higher margins and independence. He went to the Frankfurt Book Fair in October to spruik the novel. Simon is now writing the first novel in a trilogy of ‘love mysteries’ – all already plotted and scheduled for publication in 2019, 2020 and 2021. He’ll continue to use the pen-name William Henry, for sentimental reasons and to separate his fiction from his non-fiction. Simon’s From Afterwit to Zemblanity: 100 Endangered Words Brought to Life was published by New Holland in 2008. He had already published Love & Logic: A Bloke’s Guide to Commitment through Marsilio Press – and Clear, Concise, Compelling: How to Write Less and Achieve More through his consultancy Nakedize (pronounced Naked Eyes). His business is to teach ‘knowledge workers’ (everywhere from government departments to big businesses) how ‘to write effectively, slow down, think, and present ideas well to get important stuff done. I’m looking forward to people who I’ve worked with being surprised by this novel!’ Simon, who is in general very confident, is a little nervous about the novel’s reception. ‘In a way, both John and I are “coming out” as novelists. For me, it's a public declaration of “Simon the creative” – which I think is as essential to my being as my sexual orientation. Writing fiction is definitely putting myself out there. What if no one likes your novel? What if you can't secure the publishing deal you've dreamed of? What if you can't actually finish the second, third novels?’ And, I add, what if they don’t sell? ‘New Zealand fiction is on life support, but I’m just writing entertaining novels, not “New Zealand novels”, so I consider my prospects the same as any debut novelist the world over. Statistically my chances of everything working out are slim, but I'm on a mission.’ Money isn’t his motivation. ‘I care about writing and I cared about John more than I can express. This novel is an attempt to express that.’


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HOME

Close to home W R I T T E N BY SA R A H CAT H E R A L L P H OTO G R A P H Y BY A N N A B R I G GS

Rather than neighbours who become good friends, Sarah Catherall meets good friends who’ve become neighbours.

T

wo houses perched on a steep slice of land in Miramar are like siblings, sharing some characteristics while retaining distinct personalities. Their designers and owners are friends who met at architecture school in the mid2000s. The two couples –Tim Gittos and Caro Robertson, and Mat Lee and Charlotte Key – couldn’t afford to build homes on separate sites, so they decided to pool their money. Five years ago, they bought a 406-square-metre, scrubby, steep, cheap section, subdivided it and built their own separate small homes. ‘It was a lot of hassle but doing it this way made it possible for both of us,’ says Tim. Living in such close proximity works because the couples are friends. Their children – Finn Gittos, 4, and Sam Gittos, 6, and Olive Lee, 7, and Archie Lee, 5 – are also great

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HOME

friends. More like siblings than neighbours, they pop in and out of one another’s homes via a makeshift track ‘highway’ they have built. First, the couples subdivided the site, dividing it horizontally rather than vertically and running 65 steep concrete steps up one side. That way, each house enjoys morning and afternoon sun, and is affected by the same winds. ‘We wanted to prioritise the sun and the views,’ says Tim. The Gittos-Robertson clan designed the top house, while Mat began designing their house for the bottom site, a decision that came naturally. ‘We started designing our house for the top site and they were designing theirs for the bottom, because they were renting a place with heaps of steps so they preferred to be close to the road,’ recalls Caro. While passers-by probably think the houses are very similar, their exteriors and interiors have their own characters. Both boast unpainted macrocarpa cladding, aluminium joinery, exposed concrete block and grey corrugated steel. They’re simple, and built to a budget. Both houses are tall and narrow, three stories high, each with a kitchen on the northwest corner opening out to a deck. ‘We hear the kids whistling to each other to come for meetings. I can lean over the deck and see where the kids are, and we get together for

wines and kids’ dinners,’ Caro laughs. Mat works for David Melling, of Melling Architects, while Tim previously designed for the firm’s predecessor, Melling and Morse. Their homes both reflect the house style of architecture, boasting ply throughout, and a relaxed, pared back aesthetic. Tim and Caro both work from home – their business is Space Craft Architects – and specialise in building small budget dwellings. They designed an open-plan office on their mezzanine floor. The house entrance leads straight into the long open-plan kitchen and living room stretching across the middle floor, with a built-in window seat running along the expansive windows with sweeping views of Wellington. When guests come over, they pull out a trestle table and turn it into their dining table. The couple decided to keep the exterior simple – the wire netting on the verandah is ‘cheap as chips,’ says Caro – and play with their ideas inside. A stand-out feature is the macrocarpa wood throughout the house, and the built-in ply joinery in the kitchen and living room. Tim sanded the macrocarpa floors and built the long kitchen bench and high bookshelves. They did much of the work themselves to save money, so the entire project cost the couple $550,000 including the site.

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HOME

In the main living area, the architects played with the ceiling height, stretching it up two stories to give a sense of volume. From their deck, Mt Kaukau is framed in the distance. ‘Our house has that more northern thing with verandahs and doors opening out everywhere. We wanted a buffer zone around the house so that you can open a door even when it’s raining,’ says Caro. Down the hill, Mat and Charlotte’s home is laid out in a similar way, with the living area across the middle floor, bedrooms down below, and a mezzanine and second bedroom up the top. However, Mat describes their home as ‘broken planning’. He played with alcove spaces and broke the area into different zones: the stairway sticks out into the middle of the house to create two sides and the dining room juts out of the kitchen and living area. ‘Carving up the volumes into different spaces was important. Its like a classic Wellington villa which is 100 square metres on a hillside and reconfigured,’ says Mat, who is often trying to maximise volume in the small homes he designs in his day job. The kitchen and living floors are ply, while the floors downstairs are polished concrete. Throughout, the walls are painted a crisp white. Charlotte, a jeweller and industrial designer, says, ‘We wanted lots of windows and white walls with pops of colour. But we also wanted it to be a family home and fun for the kids.’ Interestingly, the two couples chose some things that were similar without consulting each other. The pink door to Olive’s bedroom for example, is a similar shade to the pink door leading to the Gittos-Robertson’s bathroom. The lifestyle they now share reminds Caro of her childhood growing up in a cul-de-sac in

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Auckland’s Remuera, where she literally climbed her back fence to visit her friend. It was an experience she sought to replicate for her children. ‘I loved the idea of creating a shared backyard. I really value the sense of family that we have here,’ she says. Mat, by contrast, grew up on a remote farm on the Wairarapa coast, where he had to travel by car to visit his friends. ‘Having this proximity to other kids is just so cool for Olive and Archie. When you’ve got friends in other parts of the city, it can be an ordeal going off to see them for a drink, this makes our socialising so easy,’ he says. The houses have shared toys. The GittosRobertson house has a swing, while the Lee-Key house has a paddling pool. The bush between the two properties doubles as a hideaway space. Both houses have built-in bunks and bedrooms that resemble adventure playgrounds. The parents share childcare, and school pickups and dropoffs. It was a joint decision to send the children to Worser Bay School. ‘We help each other out a lot. We hang out because its so easy and its so much more than we ever imagined,’ says Charlotte. On the day Capital visited, the sense of community in this small slice of suburban Miramar was amply evident. Earlier that day, Archie had an accident and had to go to the doctor, so Olive stayed back with Tim and Caro and their children. When Archie and his parents returned safe and sound, Tim sat on the steps in the baking sun and said, ‘Let’s go to the beach.’ Charlotte smiled, ‘After today, I think I need a beer.’


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GOOD SPORT

POP A MANU Jumping off the Wellington Wharf is a bit of a local thrill. If you’ve never done it, now’s your chance. To celebrate NZ Seaweek, Ghost Fishing New Zealand (see Tales of the City, Cap #45) is hosting the Great Wharf Jump on 10 March between 2pm and 4pm. Learn about Ghost Fishing New Zealand and the pollution in the harbour before taking the plunge.

RURAL RIVALS

LEAPS AND B OUNDS

HOME TURF

Our neighbours up in Palmy are hosting the Hilux Rural Games at The Square on 9–10 March. Competitors will battle it out for titles, and world record attempts will be made, at New Zealand’s premier celebration of rural sports. Events include the usual wood-chopping, haystacking, and speed shearing. There’s also cowpat tossing, tree climbing, speed-milking, and, of course, gumboot throwing. The bravest will play egg-roulette and the loose-lipped might want to have a go at olive pit spitting.

It’s a circus without the animals, or the tent. Nitro Circus is bringing its ridiculous stunts to Wellington’s Westpac Stadium on 15 March. The show includes the world’s best BMX, scooter, and inline performers, including Taupō’s Jed Mildon, the first person to land a triple and quad backflip on a BMX. With 55-foot ramps it is not for the faint-hearted, so leave nervous folks at home.

We heard what was on his roadtrip playlist in Cap #58 and now it’s back onto the field for Hurricanes prop Jeff To’omagaAllen. Only the second prop to make 100 appearances for the Hurricanes, after this season he will hang up the black and yellow jersey and move to England to play for the Wasps. Back To’omaga-Allen and the Hurricanes as they take on the Highlanders at the Westpac Stadium on 8 March in their first home-game in the 2019 Super Rugby Campaign.

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Bowl with Soul W R I T T E N BY L E I L A N I BA K E R P H OTO G R A P H BY LU K E B ROW N E

S

oul Kropelnicki hopes to one day wear the silver fern at the Olympics. ‘It’s always been a goal of mine to take skateboarding professionally,’ said the16-yearold Wellington High School student. This month he’ll be competing at Bowlzilla, New Zealand’s largest skating event, which is held annually at Waitangi Park. Soul was introduced to skating as a toddler and has been hooked ever since. ‘Mum got me an Angel Boy complete when I was three and I butt-boarded around until I saw people skating on television,’ he says. Skateboarding is making its debut at the 2020 Olympics, and there’s a real possibility that Soul’s dream could come true. But the steps to qualify aren’t yet clear. Chad Ford, the Director of Bowlzilla, has been working with skateboarding body World Skate to find pathways for talented skaters like Soul. The hope is that points accumulated from the Bowlzilla competition could

count towards qualifying for international events and the Tokyo games. However, many skaters, including Ford, are dubious about the sport’s inclusion in the Olympics. ‘I don’t believe skateboarding needed the Olympics but there is no turning back now so I hope they get it right and I will be one hundred percent supportive if they do,’ he says. Soul was the winner of last year’s U16 category at Bowlzilla, which is the only event in the country with international exposure and and thus a pathway to global events. Ford speaks highly of the young skater. ‘Soul is great, his skating is improving every year and he really inspired his friends to skate a little harder. It will be interesting to see how everyone steps up to his challenge this year.’ Bowlzilla runs from 7–10 March, with the main competition on 9 March.

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ABROAD

Tentatively Irish W R I TT E N BY DAV I D CO H E N

Why would a Wellingtonian want to visit Ireland’s County Carlow? Plenty of reasons, as it happens, including a personal one that didn’t figure in the tourism brochures.

C

arlow, a 90-minute rambling drive southeast from Dublin, is one of Ireland’s least populous counties. Just 25,000 souls make it their home, which I suppose gives it a quarter the population of Lower Hutt. Even so, there’s a lot going on along the picturesque banks of the inky-black Barrow River, which courses through much of the area. It’s home to the Chocolate Garden of Ireland, an award-winning sweet and ice cream factory where visitors get to try their hand at chocolate decoration. If that doesn’t sound like your cup of thrills, there’s always Borris House, touted as one of the most beautifully weathered of all Irish country estates. That’s saying something in a land that’s almost always easy on the eye and as old as the Bible. Ireland has been around for a while. Some historians date it back to 3000 BC, long before that part of the world even had written records. Culture seeps out of its pores. A century after its official establishment in 1306, Carlow served briefly as the country’s capital, a distinction you might wish to toast at the local O’Hara’s Brewery, where traditional Irish beers are brewed along with its versions of international ones. If beer isn’t to your taste, you can always follow my example and try wine and a five-star dinner at the nearby Campagne, which specialises in a kind of fusion food that really shouldn’t work —French yet somehow drawing on traditional Irish staples — but actually does. Campagne is one of the few Irish restaurants to have ever received a Michelin star rating, something that has so far eluded New Zealand restaurants.

Here, as elsewhere in Carlow, my wife and I had a terrific time, quite unrelated to the purpose of my visit. The actual reason I was there, rather than any of the other 25 counties in the Republic of Ireland, had to do with my Carlow-born mother’s longform birth certificate, which I need in order to get an Irish passport just in time for Brexit. Irish culture has never wildly interested me, much as I admire its civilized treatment of writers, who pay little or no tax, and who are in impressive evidence for a country with fewer inhabitants than New Zealand. I’ve never been to a St Patrick’s Day parade. Not big on the cuisine, either, although it has evidently improved greatly in recent decades. I do enjoy some of the music of Sir Van Morrison — and I like even more those traditional ballads about lost love, immigration and the place you were born. For the most part, though, the culture is a bit like the novels of the great Dubliner James Joyce: lots to admire, but maybe not something you dip into every day. Being a New Zealander, albeit with Irish citizenship rights, probably feeds into my take on Irish culture. For all the talk about the country’s AngloCeltic character, we have always heavily favoured the former. Historically, the wariness has been reciprocated. In 1845 the Dublin University Magazine tartly described New Zealand as ‘the most recent, remotest, and least civilised’ of places — and this long before Courtenay Place was nightclub central.

Kilkenny Castle, Kilkenny, Ireland

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ABROAD

Most of the waves of early Irish emigrants went to North America, and the one in thirteen who opted for the Southern hemisphere usually ended up in Australia. For the first half-century of European settlement, the number of migrants to New Zealand from Ireland was small. According to local historian Jock Phillips, writing on the Te Ara website, the New Zealand Company offered assisted passages to organised settlements in New Zealand, excluding those illiterate Irish peasants it deemed not to be ‘desirable emigrants’. As a result, hardly any of the company’s settlers were Irish-born. Those who were tended to be of Anglo-Irish background, Anglicans who came here partly because they fretted over the rise of Irish nationalism. Few of the Irish joined them. In 1848, for example, Wellington and the entire South Island had between them a mere 175 Irish. In the fledgling New Zealand political establishment, you see the same absence. The country’s ninth premier, Daniel Pollen was a Dubliner, but his term in office lasted only a matter of months. Two other leaders of Irish stock both hailed from Ulster. The only leader with immediate family roots in the Republic of Ireland to occupy the position for any serious length of time remains Jim Bolger, who held office from 1990 until 1997. My own mother was nursing in Christchurch in the 1960s, the way so many young Irish are to be seen nowadays in the major centres as a result of the working programmes for the young. By the time she arrived in New Zealand things had changed a bit. From the 1970s there was a revival or reinterpretation of some distinct forms of Irishness in New Zealand. St Patrick’s Day, for instance, had long been celebrated here with the wearing of green ribbons and scraps of wizened shamrock. Now, influenced by American interpretations, the event involves processions and green beer — no

more to my taste than the themed drinking establishments around town that purport to be Irish. I do, however, enjoy being in the thick of things. Britain’s looming departure from the EU will have Ireland at the front of the international news for much of the coming year. The Republic to the south is fully in the European fold, the six counties of the north firmly part of the departing Britain. Much of the world’s attention in the coming months will therefore be on the 499 km border that snakes between the two jurisdictions. I read all about Brexit upheavals online, of course, which dovetails with my other Irish-related interest of genealogy. Once the province — as a recent piece in The Guardian recently put it uncharitably — of ‘elderly maiden aunts with too much time on their hands and an obsession with the family name’, family sleuthing has hugely expanded with the advent of the internet. Ubiquitous broadband makes it possible to sift through hundreds of thousands of files in short order. Research that once would have entailed hundreds of hours on the road — and thousands of air miles for New Zealanders with family roots abroad — is often just a click away. Typically, those clicks (and your credit card details) get you a family-tree maker, and a pass to search immigration, census and military forms, along with photographs and related items other users may have uploaded, for fees that depend on the level of records sought. Happily with some expert help, by the time the plane touched down in Dublin, I had a pretty good rundown. A hop, skip and a jump to tiny little Carlow Town, where the local library even has a dedicated genealogy section, and the relevant documents were duly collected. David Cohen flew to Ireland with Emirates

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WĀ H I N E

G i r lfr i e n d material BY M E LO DY T H O M A S

W

hen I was 14, I met a couple of girls at El Rancho holiday camp in Waikanae, who would soon after become my two closest friends. One of them was witty and warm with enviably good boobs, the other an adorable weirdo who got kicked out on day two for smoking. We shared a love for dumb jokes and a determination to roll our eyes at everything earnest – camp leaders, platitudes, and other campers. At the time I went to Wellington Girls’ and they went to St Mary’s, so the second setting for our blossoming friendship was Wellington train station. Every afternoon this beautiful, high-ceilinged public space would be transformed into a boiling cesspit of teenage hormones, cigarette smoke, and Lynx spray, as kids from schools all over Wellington mingled, gossiped, and shoplifted from the poor kiosk owner whose two eyes couldn’t possibly have kept watch over the swarms that surrounded him, before catching trains to Kāpiti, Johnsonville, and the Hutt. We were trouble, for sure; the nature of our trouble changing slightly depending on whose house we were crashing at that weekend. In Hataitai, we made mix tapes recorded from the radio and mingled with sensitive, pimply local boys who were wonderful friends and whom we also wanted to pash. In Waikanae, we swanned by the river, sunbathing topless with 20 cent coins over our nipples (they were bigger then). In Porirua, we drove without licences and shoplifted from Mr Big Jumble. But no matter what trouble we got ourselves into we felt safe because we were in it together. Through all the bitchy bullshit of high school, knowing there were two girls who would never backstab me, and whom I would never backstab, was incredibly important for my mental health. Later I would change high schools and spend a couple of years trying on the role of ‘pick me’ girl, surrounded by guy friends and with a fair bit of my selfworth relying on their view of me as ‘different to other girls’. With great pride, I demonstrated how I could drink like them, have sex with no feelings, and mosh to bad music like them, and objectify other girls as they did. I felt simultaneously buoyed by their affection for me and frustrated that none of them read my awesome-

ness as evidence of Girlfriend Material. Through my 20s my circle of guy friends widened to include actual beautiful-hearted men whom I still adore and treasure, but it wasn’t until late in that decade that I re-awakened to something I had known as a 14-year-old and somehow forgotten: that female friendships are affirming, sustaining, and absolutely necessary. These days I’m surrounded by women who, when I arrive at work or when they turn up for a pot luck, make my heart swell with love. We talk about our feelings, our failings, our inevitable imposter syndrome. We reassure each other and like every one of each others' selfies. We are also physically intimate in a way I adore. These are women I regularly kiss on the mouth, spoon in a crowd at a concert, side-hug at parties, and share reassuring arm and leg rubs with. The females of one of our closest related species, bonobos, exhibit similar behaviours as a way of relaxing and reaffirming bonds (actually they go next level and rub their genitals together which I’m sure feels really nice but is perhaps a step too far for most human friendships). I once read a study about the same sex-friendships of young boys, which reported remarkable intimacy – participants would say things about their mates like ‘I couldn’t live without him’ and ‘I love him’ – before puberty hit and with it, the ‘no homo’ impulse, those behaviours ‘corrected’ for fear of being read as gay. There are countries where this doesn’t happen, but New Zealand isn’t one of them. In a country where both young and older men suffer greatly from depression and related stigma, loneliness, and suicidality, I can’t help but wonder how those stats might be affected if society allowed more space for the beautiful friendships of boys to continue throughout their lives. I do know some men who managed to largely escape this. Straight men who are now dads, who hug each other and tell each other that they've missed each other or that they look good without the need to add ‘no homo’ on the end. And I get some solace from knowing our sons are watching them, and that possibly – if we keep it up – they might grow up to know they have a right to enjoy the same supportive, sustaining and affirming friendships that women do.

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W E L LY A NG E L

W h a t wo u l d D e i r d r e d o? HOUSE HOUND

MEAN GIRLS

My new flat mate has a dog. They moved in on the understanding that the dog was trained. Turns out it’s not. I am so mad. How much of a chance do I need to give them? Or can I kick them out right now? I had so many people wanting the room I don’t think I’ll have trouble filling it. Cat person, Lower Hutt

I’m devastated to find out my daughter has been bullying another girl. I’m mortified and don’t even know where to begin. I feel I have completely failed as a parent. My daughter and the other girl are in the same Year 7 class. Struggling, Karori

Doggone this! I have found dog owners have over confident views of their own dog’s talents and dog lovers will always find it in their hearts to forgive BUT misrepresentation is the issue and damage is the reality here. You can totally give them notice (as short as your agreement will allow) and send them on their way. Do it today.

Bullying is a major no-no and you need to talk to your daughter now. It is hurtful and horrible and starting this young is scary as it develops the huge problem bullying has become. It is really about her and her peer group. Don’t beat yourself up, just get you daughter talking to you and to the girl she is bullying. Tell her how disappointed you are. Don’t threaten as that is what she is doing. Talk - a lot - get those communication channels open now.

SEEN AND NOT HEARD?

SELF CARE

Are you allowed to tell off other people’s children? Asking for a friend. Keeping mum, Hataitai Tricky and this depends on your friendship. You probably can give general reprimands or better, reminders of expected behaviour, before anything goes wrong. Set the ground rules but they are not your children. A word to the parents might work? Fortunately for the survival of the human race most parents are besotted by their own kids and often blissfully blind to negatives! External input is not a bad thing. Be clear, be considerate. Good luck.

While I think it’s really good that we’re talking more openly about it, I think I’m suffering from too much #metoo. The constant stream of horrible things through my social media is upsetting and exhausting. I don’t mean to put my head in the sand, but I just need a break. Am I a bad feminist? Weight of the world, Aro Valley Take a break. Get off your phone/screen/device and look up at the wonderful world around you. Love your job, talk to friends, eat salads, enjoy the evenings, be yourself. You can’t beat Wellington on any day! Get out there and enjoy your life. You only live once!

Fine print, small print, or “mouseprint” is less noticeable print smaller than the more obvious larger print it accompanies that advertises or otherwise describes or partially describes a commercial product or service.[1] The larger print that is used in conjunction with fine print by the merchant often has the effect of deceiving the consumer into believing the offer is more advantageous than it really is, via a legal technicality which requires full disclosure of all (even unfavorable) terms or conditions, but does not specify the manner (size, typeface, coloring, etc.) of disclosure. There is strong evidence that suggests the fine print is not read by the majority of consumers.[2]Fine print may say the opposite of what the larger print says. For example, if the larger print says “pre-approved” the fine print might say “subject to approval.” [3] Especially in pharmaceutical advertisements, fine print may accompany a warning message, but this message is often neutralized by the more eye-catching positive images and pleasant background music (eye candy). Sometimes television advertisements flash text fine print in camouflagic colors, and for notoriously brief periods of time, making it difficult or impossible for the viewer to rea Fine print, small print, or “mouseprint” is less noticeable print smaller than the more obvious larger print it accompanies that advertises or otherwise describes or partially describes a commercial product or service.[1] The larger print that is used in conjunction with fine print by the merchant often has the effect of deceiving the consumer into believing the offer is more advantageous than it really is, via a legal technicality which requires full disclosure of all (even unfavorable) terms or conditions, but does not specify the manner (size, typeface, coloring, etc.) of disclosure. There is strong evidence that suggests the fine print is not read by the majority of consumers.[2]Fine print may say the opposite of what the larger print says. For example, if the larger print says “pre-approved” the fine print might say “subject to approval.” [3] Especially in pharmaceutical advertisements, fine print may accompany a warning message, but this message is often neutralized by the more eye-catching positive images and pleasant background music (eye candy). Sometimes television a colors, and for notoriously brief periods of time, making it difficult or impossible for the viewer to rea Fine print, small print, or “mouseprint” is less noticeable print smaller than the more obvious larger print it accompanies that advertises or otherwise describes or partially describes a commercial product or service.[1] The larger print that is used in conjunction with fine print by the merchant often has the effect of deceiving the consumer into believing the offer is more advantageous than it really is, via a legal technicality which requires full disclosure of all (even unfavorable) terms or conditions, but does not specify the manner (size, typeface, coloring, etc.) of disclosure. There is strong evidence that suggests the fine print is not read by the majority of consumers.[2]Fine print may say the opposite of what the larger print says. For example, if the larger print says “pre-approved” the fine print might say “subject to approval.” [3] Especially in pharmaceutical advertisements, fine print may accompany a warning message, but this message is often neutralized by the more eye-catching positive images and pleasant background music (eye candy). Sometimes television advertisements flash text fine print in camouflagic colors, and for notoriously brief periods of time, making it difficult or impossible for the viewer to reaine print, small print, or “mouseprint” is less noticeable print smaller than the more obvious larger print it accompanies that advertises or otherwise describes or partially describes a commercial product or service.[1] The larger print that is used in conjunction with fine print by the merchant often has the effect of deceiving the consumer into believing the offer is more advantageous than it really is, via a legal technicality which requires full disclosure of all (even unfavorable) terms or conditions, but does not specify the manner (size, typeface, coloring, etc.) of disclosure. There is strong evidence that suggests the fine print is not read by the majority of consumers.[2]Fine print may say the opposite of what the larger print says. For example, if the larger print says “pre-approved” the fine print might say “subject to approval.” [3] Especially in pharmaceutical advertisements, fine print may accompany a warning message, but this message is often neutralized by the more eye-catching positive images and pleasant background music (eye candy). Sometimes television advertisements flash text fine print in camouflagic colors, and for notoriously brief periods of time, making it difficult or impossible for the viewer to rea Fine print, small print, or “mouseprint” is less noticeable print smaller than the more obvious larger print it accompanies that advertises or otherwise describes or partially describes a commercial product or service.[1] The larger print that is used in conjunction with fine print by the merchant often has the effect of deceiving the consumer into believing the offer is more advantageous than it really is, via a legal technicality which requires full disclosure of all (even unfavorable) terms or conditions, but does not specify the manner (size, typeface, coloring, etc.) of disclosure. There is strong evidence that suggests the fine print is not read by the majority of consumers.[2] Fine print may say the opposite of what the larger print says. For example, if the larger print says “pre-approved” the fine print might say “subject to approval.” [3] Especially in pharmaceutical advertisements, fine print may accompany a warning message, but this message is often neutralized by the more eye-catching positive images and pleasant background music (eye candy). Sometimes television a colors, and for notoriously brief periods of time, making it difficult or impossible for the viewer to rea Fine print, small print, or “mouseprint” is less noticeable print smaller than the more obvious larger print it accompanies that advertises or otherwise describes or partially describes a commercial product or service.[1] The larger print that is used in conjunction with fine print by the merchant often has the effect of deceiving the consumer into believing the offer is more advantageous than it really is, via a legal technicality which requires full disclosure of all (even unfavorable) terms or conditions, but does not specify the manner (size, typeface, coloring, etc.) of disclosure. There is strong evidence that suggests the fine print is not read by the majority of consumers.[2]Fine print may say the opposite of what the larger print says. For example, if the larger print says “pre-approved” the fine print might say “subject to approval.” [3] Especially in pharmaceutical advertisements, fine print may accompany a warning message, but this message is often neutralized by the more eye-catching positive images and pleasant background music (eye candy). Sometimes television advertisements flash text fine print in camouflagic colors, and for notoriously brief periods of time, making it difficult or impossible for the viewer to rea

Buying or selling property? Use our experience. We SEE the small print.

PARTNERS Ramona Rasch LLB David Leong LLB 38 Onepu Road | Kilbirnie, Wellington | Tel 04 387 7831 | www.raschleong.co.nz

30 Years


CALENDAR

F r e e we l l y

Feeling the pinch? Check out the following idea...

TO THE RESCUE! Predators are coming. Can you save Kaia?

Books for cooks and gardeners, makers and dreamers

Boutique magazines, books, cards, beautiful stationery and gifts 237 Cuba Street, Wellington | 934 3424 www.minerva.co.nz

Full Laundry Service

F ami l y o w n ed & o p erat ed

Located in Brooklyn’s Central Park, Kaia the Kākā is a free-to-play digital adventure game from the Nature Through Arts Collective. Using a smartphone, players interact with a kākā called Kaia, taking photos and answering special challenges, aided by artworks on site, to rescue her and her chicks from advancing predators. The augmented reality rescue adventure runs on Facebook messenger as a chatbot. So an adult needs to set up the Facebook messenger app for kids to access it. In the chatbot Kaia responds to you as you write texts, and in return, send photos of locations and clues in Central Park. The first check-in point is at the main gates – then you’re off on a race against time to help Kaia and her chicks at various points around the park. Kaia the Kākā, Central Park, until 31 March

Commercial & Linen Hire KP C La und r y & Hi r e S e r v i c e s L td

0 8 00 536 536 www.k p c la u n d r y.c o .n z Gr eater Wellington, Lower H utt, K apiti

Woollens

N o job too bi g or too smal l


PA R K ING DAY

March

Metered parking spaces temporarily transformed into art places.

1

Wellington inner city, all day.

RNZ B C HOREO GR APH IC SER IES New works by guest choreographers. Opera House, Wellington, 1-2 March.

9

THE PERFORMANC E A RC A DE Wellington Waterfront, until 3 March.

C A PITA L E NAT IONAL ART S FE ST I VAL Queens Wharf, 9–17 March. C ASTL EPOI N T R AC E S Annual beach meeting.

21 ABAC A FLORI ST POP- U P Pop-up shop and free live demo at 2pm. California Home & Garden, Lower Hutt, 11am – 3pm.

22 NE IGH B OU RS DAY AOT E AROA Various events, 22–31 March.

NZ F RI NGE FESTI VAL Various venues and times, until 23 March.

Castlepoint Beach, 12.30pm. BR R RO OM BRRRO OM

Irish vocalist/guitarist touring New Zealand.

E DITH AND GEORGE: IN OUR SEA OF I SL A N D S Exhibition of two Pacifica photographers. NZ Portrait Gallery, Queens Wharf, until May.

Transport-focused exhibition for children.

San Fran, Cuba St, 8pm.

Expressions Whirinaki, Upper Hutt, 9 March–28 April.

23 T H E W I TC H PROJ E C T

12

2 ROTARY MART I NB OROUG H FA IR The Square, Martinborough, 8am–4pm.

F R ENC H FI L M FE ST I VAL Wellington, 12–27 March. Martinborough 14–27 March.

SEAW EEK Kaupapa Moana 2019: Tiakina o Tātou Mōana – Care for our Seas. Various events, 2–10 March.

14

SEE W HAT I CAN SEE Exhibition of New Zealand photography. Aratoi Museum of Art and History, Masterton, until 31 March.

Hutt Valley Chamber of Commerce, Lower Hutt, 5.30pm.

SPEED N ET WORK I NG Meet potential clients, suppliers, investors and partners.

P OLISHED RO C KERS A ride-in bike show for classic, custom, and cool motorbikes. Panhead Tasting Room, Upper Hutt, 12–4pm.

INTE RNATIONAL WOM A N S DAY WATERB OURNE Water sports festival. Bishop Park, Lower Hutt, 8–10 March.

Soundings Theatre, Te Papa, 23–24 March, 4pm.

28 AFT E R HOU RS : T H E H E ART OF T H E M AT T ER Film screening and Q&A. Wellington Museum, 7pm.

29 With Hon Amy Adams MP.

Trentham Racecourse, Upper Hutt, from midday.

Boulcott’s Farm Heritage Golf Club, Lower Hutt, 12pm.

W EL L INGTON PRI DE PAR ADE

30

Courtenay Place, 6pm.

17

8

Performed by Crows Feet Dance Collective.

WOM E N I N BU SI NE S S LU NCH

16 OA K S DAY R AC E S

3

WAL L I S BI RD

S A IN T PAT RIC K’S DAY

T H E PL ANET S The NZSO, with conductor and musical director Edo de Waart. Michael Fowler Centre, 7.30pm

20

C U BADU PA

M ĀOR IL AN D FI L M FE ST I VAL

Street festival

Ōtaki, 20–24 March.

Cuba Street, 30–31 March

YO U R D R E A M C O M E T R U E

Walk down the aisle at Wellington’s Old St Paul’s www.heritage.org.nz


GROUPIES

Boa t in g in t h e b lood W R I TT E N BY F R A N C E S CA E M M S P H OTO G R A P H BY SA N N E VA N G I N K E L

S

alt water runs through the Stanley family veins. 'We are heavily involved with Worser Bay,’ says Belinda Stanley, Rear Commodore at Worser Bay Boating Club (WBBC). Her husband, coaching coordinator Glenn, and his brother Dean, the Commodore, began sailing at the club as young boys. Belinda and Glenn’s three children are also keen sailors. ‘Over the season our Saturdays are spent at the club – junior sailing in the morning and senior sailing in the afternoons,’ she says. ‘The children will either be sailing, playing in kayaks or on paddleboards out on the water or swimming. They’ve spent hours in the rock pools and on the beach with friends who have also grown up at the club.’ They're not the only ones with family history at WBBC. Belinda points out Tabitha St Amand, whose dad Matt used to sail at the club when he was younger. Now he sails a Laser with the seniors in the afternoon. Matt’s mum used to help out in the club kitchen – ‘Now it is the next generation who bring their kids along.’ Then there’s Optimist sailor Lexi Kerr.

‘Her mum Penny is a good sailor and used to sail at the Club in a two-person Sunburst. She won the Sunburst Nationals in Embers.’ Later this month the club is hosting the Worser Bay Beach Carnival. Funds raised will go towards Waka Tuaone, the Boat & Beach Wise Education centre, in their new building on the bay. ‘It is so exciting to see the new clubrooms getting closer to completion,’ says Belinda. ‘Everyone has put a lot of effort into getting the club to this place. The kids have learnt about offering time and services and are starting to think about what they can contribute themselves.’ The community event includes a sandcastle competition, sea rescue demos and ‘have a go’ sailing. ‘We will have many of the yacht club families, young and old, helping out with the carnival to make it a success,’ says Belinda. ‘It gets bigger and bigger every year. It seems people enjoy a traditional carnival with games and good food.’ Worser Bay Beach Carnival, Sunday 10 March, from10am

Tabitha, Lexi, Sami and Jaxon 84



MAX GIMBLETT

CREATION 7 - 30 MARCH 2019 42 Victoria Street Wellington 6011 | +64 4 471 2636 www.pageblackiegallery.co.nz | info@pageblackiegallery.co.nz


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