We & Thee, Fall/Winter 2014

Carolina Friends School

Looking Back

Fall/Winter 2014

The First 50 Years of CFS

From the editor When I interviewed Barbara Boineau, the first teacher hired by CFS in 1964, at her alpaca ranch in Utah, she talked of instilling in the children the idea of “roots and wings.” As Barbara herself was learning what it meant to be a teacher in a Quaker school, she wanted the children to feel grounded in the Quaker belief that there is that of God in everyone, in reverence for the land, in stillness within, and in a deep sense of community and service. This year, we celebrate 50 years of Carolina Friends School. In this issue of We & Thee, we take a look back through time.

Please join me as we revisit our roots.

Three principals of the school share thoughts about Community, Service, and Learning—the three pillars of our celebration. We take a walk through campus changes over time with John McGovern. Why are some of our earliest alums now sending their children to CFS? Find out in “Education as Activism; Activism as Education.”

Sports and athletics are now an important part of school life. Patience Vanderbush helps us to understand the beginnings of sports at CFS in “Whose House?”

Members of the 50th Anniversary Planning Committee have orchestrated a yearlong celebration, which began with our silent meeting for worship on September 13, exactly fifty years from the day that school opened in 1964. Be sure to check the calendar in this issue for highlights of our celebration. We hope you will save dates now for events you won’t want to miss.

Carrie Huff Guest Editor

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From The Principals

On Learning,

It has become a tradition to begin every edition of We & Thee with a column from the Principal. To kick off this issue, which is part of the celebration of the first five decades of CFS, we asked Mike Hanas, our current head, and two of his predecessors, John Baird and Don Wells, to contribute their thoughts on some of what makes Carolina Friends School such a truly wonderful and remarkable place.

Service, Community Learn On!

Service is Like Breathing

Community

by Mike Hanas, Principal 2003-

by John Baird, Principal 1989-2002

by Don Wells, Principal 1974-1988

As far back as I can remember, I’ve loved to learn. I know it hasn’t always been easy or fun. I also know that loving to learn wasn’t the result of any single Latin, Greek, or ancient history class, though indeed I loved many of these. Nor was it the result of the more humbling art, science, and dance classes, which I have also valued.

In fact, I think my love for learning has evolved, actually deepened, as I’ve come to realize that learning is about becoming.

Early on I viewed learning as becoming smarter, i.e., knowing more stuff. It was this kind of learning and knowing that allowed me to excel on the Illinois State Latin Exam in high school. Later, as an undergraduate, I began to understand learning as becoming an effective questioner, willing to question another’s point of view, even that of a teacher.

I’m convinced that the deepening of my love for learning was animated by inspiring teachers and mentors, including my mother Anne, who nurtured my desires both to understand and to put whatever understanding I could muster to good use.

And in my 29 years as an educator, I’ve enjoyed countless opportunities to try to contribute to a student’s understanding and inclination to put that understanding to good use – not to mention the countless opportunities I’ve enjoyed to learn from and with students about myself and our world.

What I’ve not seen in those 29 years (or in all of my years as a student) is a more vivid example of a school creating the conditions for becoming than CFS. In fact, it is at CFS that I have learned the Quaker testimony that truth is continually revealed. And it is at CFS that I have learned most fully that the truth being revealed may be a matter of math or reading, language, teamwork, or theater - or me. And at our very best at CFS, we learn and celebrate not only what each of us is becoming individually, but also what and who we are becoming collectively, in community and in the interest of service.

Quakerism is rooted in the experience that God is directly accessible to everyone.

Quakers approach the world in light of their conviction of the worth of every person and an impulse to “see what love can do.”

This conviction has been expressed in Friends’ relentless efforts to eliminate war and its causes, to relieve suffering, and to create social conditions that will enable every human being to realize his or her full potential. Grounded in their spiritual experience, Friends have exerted a profound influence on issues of peace and justice throughout their history.

Carolina Friends School sprung from Friends’ commitment to work for equality, peace, and justice. The members of Chapel Hill and Durham Monthly Meetings who started CFS were seeking to address the evils of racial inequality by founding a school open to people of all racial backgrounds and based on Friends principles. “On the whole,” Howard Brinton once wrote, “it is true to say that the main object of Quaker education was to relate individual life to a more than individual purpose.” CFS has done that by creating a community which has extraordinary power to transform both individuals and society. Based on the affirmation that there is “that of God,” the “Inner Light,” or “Inward Teacher” within each person, CFS nurtures the development of the whole child, helps students to believe in their own potential, and to respect themselves and other people. Students experience a sense of haven, of being at home as members of the CFS community.

At the same time they are encouraged to develop the strength and courage to take risks, the commitment to challenge things that need challenging, and the compassion to use their gifts to help and serve others.

They learn to address complex issues of race, class, gender, injustice, and violence with a sense of hope that comes from the spiritual dimension of the School. They

continued on page 19

continued on page 19

Still – in a way – nobody sees a flower really It is so small – we haven’t time And to see takes time.

Like to have a friend takes time.

Georgia O’Keefe As our mission states, Carolina Friends School is a vibrant and inclusive learning community empowering students to think critically, creatively, and independently.

Students, faculty, parents, and the Board of Trustees take the cultivation of such a vibrant learning community very seriously.

Perhaps most noteworthy, all are dedicated to fostering natural creativity, curiosity, and inquiry while seeking that of God in each person. Being amongst students at any level of the School, one is struck with the energy, openness, laughter, and purposefulness that permeate the place. Visitors to the School are frequently struck by the lightness of being that coexists alongside an intense focus on learning.

The School community is not only an aggregate of people who happen to be striving together to “become educated.”

Rather, it is a group of people who work intentionally to form and sustain community. The School affirms the premise that to become an integral part of any community, one must begin by knowing oneself. Like “to see takes time”, and “to have a friend takes time”, becoming a vital member of the Friends School community takes time both internally and externally.

Perhaps the single most important aspect of the School’s life is its respect of silence, of active listening within and without, of working to truly hear oneself and to hear others. This corporate search with one another results in the formation of deep bonds amongst everyone – in short, the formation of community. Most other learning environments are not devoted to this journey. Hence, opportunities to build community are inadvertently scheduled out and replaced by external trappings such as motivational speeches (which rarely are) or continued on page 19 Carolina Friends School 3

Education as Activism; Activism as Education

by Marsha A. Green, Clerk of the Board of Trustees

For 50 years, since its creation as a public witness against the injustice of segregated schools, CFS has been a community where social issues burn brightly – a place where academic freedom encourages learning about the world by engaging with it.

Peggy Manring, parent of two alums and grandparent to three current students, taught at CFS from 1970 to 1980. She remembers vividly how Middle School students claimed their voices one year during the cacophony of Vietnam-era protests. The students chose to raise money for a hospital in Cambodia that U.S. forces had bombed. It was an edgy decision – some people still supported the war, even at CFS. “But the students could explain to people that it didn’t matter if you were pro or anti-war, there were still people that needed help,” remembers Peggy.

The students wrote letters to bolster their fundraising and fanned out across their neighborhoods to share their thoughts. One girl returned to school weeping over the harsh words she encountered. “She had never had people speak to her that way,” Peggy said.

“But she didn’t give up. And everyone learned more about the complexities of the issues.”

That understanding may be a key to how CFS has been continually fueled by social issues without being consumed by their fires.

“It is so important that we teach children how to engage in fruitful dialogue,” says Charlie Layman, who has taught elementary students at CFS since 1991. “We make a difference in the world not by shouting from one polarized place to another but by engaging with each other.”

That engagement has taken many forms. In the ‘70s, Peggy Manring and Darlene Wells educated themselves about feminism so they

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could explore it in a “Women’s History” class with their students. In 1990, as the first Gulf War began, staff scheduled a staff development discussion to voice their experiences, hopes, fears, and questions and talk about how to address the situation with students. In 2005, the School began nurturing a relationship between incoming freshmen and the community of Newton Grove to introduce students to social issues of immigration, poverty, and labor laws. In the past year, at least three CFS staff members were arrested during Moral Monday protests, and Randall Williams’ class Quaker Advocacy debated the pros and cons of students engaging in civil disobedience.

Experiences like these often provoke passionate responses. But the Quaker tradition of listening helps the community move more easily from a place of passion to a place of compassion.

“CFS has always tried to address the issues, but also to temper any rabid position and to remember how important it is to listen, empathize, and understand the issue,” says Don Wells, who came to CFS in 1969 to help open the Middle School, and served as head of school from 1974 to 1988. “The omnipresence of silence was key. It taught us to listen – to ourselves and to others.”

Listening takes time: there are tales to be told about lengthy discernment around burning issues of the day such as whether smoking should be allowed on campus, whether staff should be allowed to distribute condoms in the Upper School, or whether paintball is an appropriate advisee activity. Threshing through these issues often includes the School Life Committee, staff meetings, classroom discussions, trustee conversations, and even meetings for worship.

It was in a meeting for worship that the issue of the School’s policy on benefits for same-sex partners was first raised. During a staff meeting for worship in the early ‘90s, Charlie Layman felt a message rising in his heart. He rose to his feet. “I’ve never been in a place where I’ve been so loved and accepted,” he said. “But I’m wondering why my partner can’t be covered by health insurance. This is an issue where silence doesn’t serve us.”

At the rise of the meeting, a committee was formed to look into options. When the School discovered its insurance company wouldn’t cover same-sex partners, the board approved offering an extra stipend to help affected staff purchase health care. Eventually, the school administration was able to work with the insurance company to cover same-sex partners with the same level of coverage as legally married couples.

“I never ended up using the benefit, because my partner got a job with his own benefits,” says Charlie. “But the openness of the School to hear and consider a different point of view and act upon it was incredibly affirming.”

Peggy Manring’s son Kent Phelps, who came to CFS as a third grader in 1965, said that openness and affirmation of different views is what sold his family on CFS in the ‘60s and again nearly 50 years later.

“My parents were active in the civil rights movement. I was different and definitely treated that way by my public school classmates. In 1965, CFS offered a great environment where we were all accepting of each other. Fast forward to the present, and [my wife] Catherine and I placed Samuel at CFS for pretty much the same reason – we wanted an inclusive environment.”

Keeping up with Barbara

by Carrie Huff, Co-Clerk of the 50th Anniversary Planning Committee

The year was 1964. A group of Friends from the Durham and Chapel Hill Meetings wanted the opportunity for their children and others to experience education that was racially integrated and rooted in both Quaker values and sound, progressive educational practices. Having conceived of the idea for a school in 1960, incorporated as the Carolina Friends School in 1962, and raised monies in 1963, they were finally in search of their very first “Durham Kindergarten” teacher. Enter: Barbara Boineau, a young mother of three who was looking to be employed in a “child-centered school” in Durham.

In 1964, Barbara Boineau had no idea how the mission of Carolina Friends School would come to be articulated in 2014, and yet she believed, with that first class of kindergartners, that “we teach our children that it is possible to change the world.” She and co-teacher Sashi Anand were already incorporating “active exploration and quiet reflection, individual endeavor and collaborative engagement” into the early Carolina Friends School experience.

As Jim Henderson reported in an article for the October 2012 Parent Update, “Barbara was very clear that what she did as

a teacher was informed by Quaker values and practices. Martha Klopfer and Naomi Adams, her volunteer co-teachers and school administrators, helped Barbara to facilitate the marriage of Quaker values and progressive educational practices. Children were taught to explore silence, to look within, to respect differences in others, to love nature, and to seek community…Barbara had a background in Montessori education but she also practiced an approach to learning she called ‘creative education.’ There were times in the school day for instruction and times for imaginative play. Both times mattered.”

Barbara recalls a wonderful diverse population in this first class, realizing the founders’ dream of an integrated school where parents were committed to education. Many of the first CFS parents were members of the Duke University and the North Carolina Central University faculties.

According to Barbara, both President Sanford of Duke and President Friday of UNC were early supporters of the School.

She smiles when she says, “Kids who came from tightly controlled families we loosened up. Kids who came from loosely controlled families we tightened up.”

Although Barbara was not a Quaker, she was committed to creating a school “informed by Quaker values and practices” and found herself constantly discovering what that meant. For example, in the early days, she and the children began each day by reciting the Pledge of Allegiance—until Martha Klopfer informed her that Friends refrain from taking any kind of loyalty oath, even in courts of law. Martha explained that Friends “have their allegiance to a higher power, but not necessarily to government.”

Since part of Barbara’s motivation for reciting the Pledge was helping the children learn the difference between right and left hands, it was agreed that she and the children would greet each other with a right hand shake each day.

Barbara remained at CFS for only two years. Working with young children had sparked a desire in her to learn more, and she entered a graduate program at Duke in Education of Emotionally Handicapped Children. Upon receiving her Masters and

Ph.D., she began work in the Durham Public School system as School Psychologist. Barbara fully believes that her early experience at CFS started her on a path that led to important work with adolescents and their families. She eventually became a support person for individuals dealing with substance abuse and addiction, work that she continues to this day.

Following a divorce and the raising of her children, Barbara met Frank Dorman, and her life took another turn. Lovers of horses and the great outdoors, they moved to nine acres in Wanship, Utah, where they built a barn, followed by a house, and then another barn. Barbara and Frank’s River Run Ranch is now home to a herd of alpacas and sheep, a handsome peacock and a few peahens, cats, dogs, and occasional guinea fowl (with horses elsewhere). The alpacas provide wool that Barbara spins, dyes, and knits into items for her grandchildren as well as an orphanage in Kazakhstan, Russia, and an organization helping abandoned AIDS orphans in Africa.

When the founders were searching for their first Carolina Friends School teacher, they found a teacher whose own life would resonate with the values that informed the School in important ways. Barbara says, “When working with kids, it’s always magical.” In two short years, Barbara created magic that, 50 years later, is alive and well.

Carolina Friends School 5

The Lay of the Land

As a boy, John McGovern could be found taking apart faucets in his Bethesda, Maryland, home, or shadowing his mother’s landscape designer, learning how a plot of land can be transformed. A student at Sidwell Friends School, John had no inkling of the vital role he would one day play at another Quaker school nearly 300 miles south.

In 1973, when John was hired as a CFS Lower School teacher, both he and the School were young. The facilities needed work, but money was scarce. Sometimes buying basic supplies for a classroom, even a

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by Rebecca Lanning, Parent of a CFS student and alum John says. He wanted to help both the can of paint, seemed extravagant.

While the Durham Early School and school and the students realize their potenChapel Hill Early School had been operating tial.

In the process, John realized his own. for nearly a decade, the Middle School had When daughter Erin was born in 1982, just opened. The Upper School, housed in four prefab structures, would soon move John, a man ahead of his time, went on into its new quarters—a simple log building paternity leave. Upon his return, Don Wells up the hill. The Lower School consisted of a appointed him Assistant to the Principal in single brick building. “There were no out- Charge of Building and Grounds. door play structures for the children,” John Eventually, that title would be shortened to recalls. “There was mud all around the build- Assistant Principal and changed to Acting Head of School from 2002-03. But anyone ing, and huge gullies in back.”

But John was a self-starter: resourceful, who has spent 10 minutes in a golf cart with John can attest that no title could adequately creative, and up for a challenge.

When an old Durham hotel was scheduled reflect the scope of his responsibilities at for demolition, John ripped out the carpet CFS. One minute he’s troubleshooting with and installed it in the Lower School. He a contractor; the next he’s refilling one of knocked out walls to facilitate family group- the many bird feeders he has placed around ings in classes, and repurposed album bins campus. “I think the worst thing to see is an from Durham’s Record Bar into file cabinets empty bird feeder,” he says with a wink.

Over the next 17 years, John oversaw for classrooms. In response to the energy crisis, John built a solar collector on the roof. many enhancement projects on the School’s After school, John would tackle the fixer- main campus, including the construction of upper he and his wife, Nancy, bought off St. the Center building in 1986, designed by Mary’s Road, taking breaks to build cubbies Dail Dixon and built by contractor and forfor the Lower School. Later John would mix mer CFS parent Bob Calhoun. The Shop home and work in reverse: bringing his new- opened in 1991. A house on Mt. Sinai Road born son, Jonathan, to school for a few was lifted from its foundation and transporthours every morning so Nancy could get ed through the Klopfer’s horse field and across the baseball field before being set some uninterrupted sleep.

Whether wielding a sledgehammer or down in its present location as Campus wearing a Snugli, John looked for opportuni- Early School, which opened in 1988. Ten ties to make a difference. Parents who sent years later, Terry Pendergrast, a master cartheir children to CFS “took a leap of faith,” penter who joined the staff shortly after

John, remodeled the house with help from student service groups. Another service project, the Hut (originally named the Student Lounge), was patched together with wood John and Terry salvaged from the Duke Recycling warehouse, along with wood they timbered and sawed on site. Between 1992 and 1997, John oversaw the renovation and expansion of all units on the main campus. In 1998 the School’s entrance was moved and the driveway reconfigured.

Humorous and self-deprecating, John tends to downplay his role in this remarkable evolution, crediting the power of teamwork and constructive communication. “I’m just here to keep things moving along,” he says.

Turning Points A major milestone for CFS came in 1999 when generous financial gifts allowed for the construction of a gymnasium. Gone were the days of playing basketball in off-campus rec leagues or renting space at other schools, which often required John to dash up and down the bleachers changing the score on a chalkboard while simultaneously running the clock and keeping stats. With a gym of its own, CFS proved that it could hold fast to its Quakers philosophy while offering a competitive athletic program. John, who served as project manager, sees the gym as a major turning point for the school.

More recently, John has managed a number of projects made possible by Building

Friends, an unprecedented capital campaign led by Anthony L. Clay, the School’s current (and first) Director of Advancement. The renovation of the Quaker Dome, Middle School expansion, greenhouse, and US Maker Space are all part of a new wave of campus enhancements, designed by Ellen Weinstein and built by McLean Construction Company.

Just last summer, John witnessed an event he had dreamed about but never thought possible, at least not during his tenure at CFS: construction of tennis courts on campus. Fifteen years ago, when a few Middle School students expressed their desire to form a tennis team. John, an avid player, fed them balls in the newly constructed gym.

But the team had to travel, sometimes great distances, to find available courts. Despite the inconvenience, John kept the program going.

Now, thanks to more generous gifts, John is looking forward to coaching tennis on campus with assistance from his son, Jonathan (that sleepless newborn, who went on to become a CFS lifer, college tennis player, and now valued CFS staff member).

With a gleam in his eye, John describes his vision of offering lessons to the staff, holding summer tennis camps, and videotaping players so that they can make adjustments to their game. “It’s impossible to predict the impact of these courts on our community,” he says.

As John reflects on how CFS has changed over the years, he notes that one thing has remained the same: the School’s natural, awe-inspiring setting. In his role as coach and former athletic director, John has driven many bus loads of students back to campus late at night. “They look toward Durham, and ask why it’s lighter over there, and I tell them, ‘That’s light pollution.’ A lot of students have never seen a sky full of stars.

That experience is part of the gift of this land from the Klopfers.”

John notes that daylight hours on campus are equally inspiring. “At what other school can you look out every classroom window and see trees?” he asks rhetorically as he gazes out a window in the MS/US library.

Many of the trees and shrubs on campus were planted by John, including azaleas around the Lower School “to give it some color.” He also planted the cherry tree by the stone walkway. “It’s gotten big,” he muses.

As John reflects on the power of nature, one can see glimmers of him as a young boy, tinkering with tools, learning about landscapes.

Now John envisions students using the new greenhouse to propagate perennials, which they in turn could plant around campus. Smiling wistfully, he says, “Who knows what that experience could spark?”

Carolina Friends School 7

A 50th Anniversary

by Jim Henderson, Staff Member 1982-2013 What follows are excerpts from a guided meditation composed and shared with the staff by Jim Henderson in April 2012. For the complete text, please see 27 Views of CFS. In his preface, Jim expresses gratitude to friends and colleagues who shared information and apologies for not naming more of the many remarkable persons who shaped and embodied the spirit of the School during the last half-century.

....

A colonial road (originally an Indian trading path) followed the creek that traverses the land that is now CFS. End-to-end, it stretched from Hillsborough to New Bern.

Twenty-seven-year-old John Lawson walked on, or very near, this road as he traveled through the Carolinas in 1701. He later wrote favorably about the land, animals, and people he encountered in a book entitled A New Voyage to the Carolinas. This volume, published in London in 1709, was partly responsible for an influx of new settlers to central North Carolina, quite a few of whom, for a time, were Quakers. Recently Martha Klopfer showed me where the wellpreserved remains of the Eno-Lawson road cross the CFS Nature Trail, behind their house, near the gravel horse-training ring.

The trail continues along the creek and past the Shop, emerging to cross Friends School Road close to Mt. Sinai Road. Henry and Joan Walker have used this trail for decades to walk to campus from their home on Old Stony Way. Quakers, mainly from Ireland, settled along the Eno River in the 1750s and built simple but successful mills, taverns, and farms, and at least one Meeting House north and east of Hillsborough. In fairly short order, more ruthlessly enterprising colonists forced these early Friends off their prime land. As the Regulators heralded the dawn of the American Revolution, a mass migration of forty Quaker families to Georgia signaled a Friendly retreat from Orange County conflicts in 1768.

During the nineteenth century the CFS campus became part of, or at least the neighbor of, the Couch Plantation. . . . Cotton and tobacco were probably raised on the clear-

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cut land that became CFS; certainly hay, corn, and field peas were grown here in the decades before the first students arrived.

With Sherman’s army occupying Raleigh, and Johnston’s forces massed in Hillsborough, CFS was a “no-man’s land” in 1865. Foraging or patrolling soldiers must have roamed the campus that spring. A cannonball and a musket ball were found in the creek many years ago, and canister shot was discovered on the site of the Lower School.

Tom Magnuson, a local historian (and parent of two CFS graduates), speculates that cannon might have been fired in the direction of the creek bottomland as artillery batteries discharged their loaded rounds to celebrate the war’s end. More Civil War relics, or artifacts from even earlier times, may be unearthed if we carefully dig the footings of future buildings.

After the “Jubilee” of Emancipation, the old Couch Plantation became a racially diverse neighborhood of subsistence farmers. Dedicating the high ground to the glory of God, former slaves founded the Mt. Sinai Missionary Baptist Church in 1871. Both black and white Couches lived very close by, and some are still the School’s neighbors.

Quite a few descendents of the black Couches became valued members of the CFS community. An American Friends Service Committee work camp in the late 1960s did much to forge a friendly relationship between the new school and the much older church communities.

As the nineteenth century yielded to the twentieth, sharecropping residents of the Mt. Sinai community would cut through land that is now the CFS campus as they walked to Hillsborough or to University Station.

The train was a main artery of transportation to Durham in the first half of the twentieth century, although farm and household supplies were typically hauled from Durham with a wagon and a mule. Greg Garneau and Carole Stern, former CFS teachers and School parents, learned much about these old-time ways when they worked closely, and visited almost daily, with Tom Couch (a patriarch of the Mt. Sinai Community) and

his wife Bessie in the early to mid 1970s.

Two decades later, Upper School teachers Jamie Hysjulien and Bryce Little learned their own lessons in local history when they and their students interviewed older Mt. Sinai community residents about the lively “juke joints” and the piedmont blues music scene that flourished, from the 1930s into the 1950s, not only in Durham but also right along Mount Sinai Road, an easy walk both from the church and from what is now our campus. A video documentary made by Kenny Dalsheimer, a School parent and former Middle School teacher, highlights those times. Bootlegging was a thriving trade back then. The location of a still, once operated by a Mr. Lee from the 1940s well into the 1960s, can still be seen from the CFS Nature Trail.

Peter and Martha Klopfer, a new Duke faculty family in the 1950s, purchased the land where we now sit on Valentine’s Day, 1959. . . . The house where the Klopfers still live was constructed in the 1940s.

Peter Klopfer recently told me that the farmland was not well tended when his family moved here; it had gone into succession, was badly overgrown, and the pastures had probably not been mowed for several years.

With sustained care and effort, the Klopfers successfully improved and expanded the farm, raised their three daughters here, and managed generations of horses, goats, sheep, poultry, elkhounds, and other members of the animal kingdom, at Tierreich Farm. Through the decades the School grew up alongside the Klopfer family. Gretchen Klopfer Wing, a CFS graduate and former Upper School teacher, remembers CFS as her “third sister.”

From the beginning of their time in Durham, the Klopfers were deeply engaged, along with other members of the Durham and Chapel Hill Friends Meetings, in ending racial segregation. Carolina Friends School came to be as members of the Meetings were led to demonstrate against segregation by creating an educational institution open to all students and founded on Quaker principles. CFS was incorporated in 1962—per-

Guided Meditation haps the first elementary school in the modern South to be dedicated to racially integrated education. The School’s first employee was hired in 1963, with funds originally allocated for conducting a feasibility study to determine if it made sense to start a school at all!

The Durham Kindergarten, later known as Durham Early School, opened its doors to students in September of 1964, and in September of 1965 the Chapel Hill Early School became the second unit of Carolina Friends School. The main campus opened in 1966. The first building on the main campus was the central portion of today’s Lower School. (The Lower School multi and the current River classroom were added later.)

However, the first structure built on CFS land was the water tower. David and Susan Smith, of Duke University and Durham Friends Meeting, had a vision of “a great people to be gathered here,” as George Fox might have said. The Smiths wanted to ensure a plentiful supply of water for the community to come.

By 1970 CFS enrolled 250 students. Four “UKs”—prefab, World War II-era buildings, originally erected on the UNC campus— housed the Middle School until the current Middle School building opened in 1971. The current Music House and Annex are former UKs. In 1972 the Quaker Dome was constructed. The School’s longest-serving employees were hired in the very early 1970s.

CFS honored its first graduates in 1973: a young man, Willis (“Bunk”) James, and a young woman, Tyree Barnes. These two African American teenagers had left their segregated schools in eastern North Carolina as a matter of principle. The next year, ten CFS students graduated from what is now called the “Early College” program at Guilford College. In 1975 the log Upper School building opened its doors. Cal Geiger, a former CFS teacher and member of Durham Meeting, supervised this building project, along with his then-young teaching associates, Terry Pendergrast and John McGovern. At this time, with only two Early Schools, CFS accommodated approximately

The First Graduates of CFS:

Willis James and Tyree Barnes

Excerpts from a 1973 Herald-Sun article, “School Leads Students from Friction to Freedom,” written by Mamie Dunn, staff writer.

Many thanks to Fay B. Mayo, a civil rights activist associated with the events, who sent us this newspaper clipping.

425 students. (The current enrollment is approximately 500.)

During the 1980s and ‘90s further improvements were made to the main campus. The Center building was constructed by contractor and former School parent Bob Calhoun and completed in 1986. The Campus Early School—a donated house, moved from a location halfway down the Mt. Sinai Road hill—opened in 1988, and the Shop was completed in 1991. A predecessor to all those projects, the Upper School Hut, was built under the guidance of Terry and John, with help from Upper School students. Wood for constructing The Hut, originally called the “Student Lounge,” was cut using a portable sawmill powered by a VW engine. . . .

Over the last twenty years, the Lower School, the Middle School, and the Early Schools all were expanded and updated. The Upper Field became a baseball field, origi-

nally laid out by Upper School students as an end-of-year project. The library, art studios, science labs, computer lab, and classrooms of the Resource Center were completed, adjacent to the Upper School and following the School’s first million-dollar capital campaign, in November of 1993. The CFS gym, made possible by a gift from an anonymous donor, went into service as the new millennium began. Since the 1990s new CFS buildings and unit improvements have been designed by Dail Dixon and Ellen Weinstein and built by McLean Construction Company.

The gym and soccer fields occupy land once owned by the [Couch Sisters] and sold to Duke Forest, whose management then swapped some wetland behind the Campus Early School for the land that accommodates the CFS gym and soccer fields as well as the new School entrance, which now leads to paved roads and accessible paths and

Carolina Friends School 9

buildings. In the 1970s and ‘80s, then Principal Don Wells used to say that the School was “ungraded—like our driveways.” Now the way in and the way out, like the turf beneath our young athletes’ feet, is smooth and dust-free.

The newest building we see today on campus is the Meeting Hall, completed in 2006.

Renovation of the Quaker Dome began in the summer of 2012 and was completed in the spring of 2013, and a major Middle School expansion was completed during this fiftiethanniversary year. Inspired by what Advancement Director Anthony Clay refers to as “audacious aspirations,” the School has a site plan, approved by Orange County, that includes more, and more suitable, spaces for teaching and learning, such as a bigger and better shop (a true “service learning center”)— plus a new performing arts center, new athletic facilities, and an outdoor education center, all planned to open across the creek on an expanded campus served by a second entrance, which has been created off Mount Sinai Road.

Thanks to the commitment of many industrious, intelligent, principled, persistent, visionary and generous people, CFS has grown into a mature institution—one with an inspiring past, and a future that promises both further challenges and still greater accomplishments.

May we continue to be responsible guardians of the vision we are heirs to—and grateful stewards of the land that grounds everything we do (and have done) as teachers, students and parents, and as trustees of the spirit of this sacred, storied place.

Jim Henderson is a former Middle School teacher, Upper School teacher, Development Coordinator, and Upper School Head Teacher, as well as the parent of two CFS graduates.

We & Thee is available in color online at www.cfsnc.org.

Would you like to save a tree or two?

If you would like to stop your paper copy and have a color PDF of We & Thee emailed to you, email: lshmania@cfsnc.org.

10 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

Hot Off the Press:

27 Views of CFS is here!

27 Views of Carolina Friends School is here! Two years in the making and in honor of our 50th Anniversary, we have compiled a collection of essays, short stories, poems, and remembrances that we think you will enjoy.

Our collection of authors includes 3 principals, 10 staff members (former and current), 9 alums, 20 parents (former and current), 2 co-founders, 1 basketball coach, and many published authors. According to school parent and writer Melinda Ruley, “Emerging above all from these essays is a portrait of the children who leave Carolina Friends School—at the end of a day or the end of senior year—emboldened, resilient, streaked with mud, and speaking truth. In other words, educated—and ready to change the world.”

The book sells for $15.00. To purchase a copy at the Center, see Kathy Krahenbuhl. If you would like to order a copy to be mailed to you, please email Carrie Huff at chuff@cfsnc.org. There is a $5.00 charge for Shipping & Handling. Checks should be made out to Carolina Friends School

Join us for a 27 Views of Carolina Friends School Author’s Tea on Sunday, March 8, at 3:00 pm in the Upper School Meeting Hall.

The Recruitment of Cal Geiger

by Don Wells, Principal 1974-1988 It was late April and the Middle School staff was earnestly wrestling with a concern.

Of the 110 students, all but 14 had not yet experienced any kind of field trip that year.

Their behavior was simply too volatile to risk on a multi-day excursion off campus.

Of course there were some staff members who earnestly believed that each one would benefit from such an experience. A field trip experience might well help some of them (all of them?) turn a behavioral corner.

But there were, of course, skeptics. Other students had “earned” their right to attend such trips whereas this group of 14 had not.

There was an important educational lesson in that.

Consensus was elusive. Finally a wise staff member asked: “If the group should have an off-campus experience, what would it be and who would lead it?” About a four minute silence followed. We all had been avoiding that question. Finally, I proposed that the 14 go on a work project at Quaker Lake for four days, three nights. Who would lead it? I would if, and only if, I was convinced that the group would (could?) rise to the occasion. There was relief, the doubters agreed, the advocates cautiously happy, and the trip began to take form.

That evening I called Cal Geiger, then the manager of Quaker Lake. We were very familiar with Cal and Quaker Lake as a favorite retreat center for the School. Cal was known as a very wise, thoughtful, and talented Friend. I told him of the proposal and the cast of characters who would be involved. Cal, of course, had a work project in mind: to begin the shingling of the large picnic pavilion near the Lake. He said the crew might get ½ done in four days but it would be a start. And, he agreed to give it a try with the understanding that the group would know and abide by clear behavioral rules.

The next day I met with all 14 of them. It was a truth and consequences meeting: 1) Each of your behavior has precluded your involvement in an off-campus field trip; 2) Here is what the staff and I propose; 3) This is what will be expected – without failure – of each and all of you; 4) If just one of you violates one expectation, the entire trip will

end.

Persons had to voice her/his agreement. To their credit, some took a while to agree, but in the end, all did. (And in the end, truth be told, they were bonded!)

I confirmed the trip with Cal, arranged food planning and carpools, and notified parents that if the trip were aborted at any point, they must be available to pick us all up. The group, dubbing themselves the motley crew, worked wonderfully together on all preparations and we were ready on launch day. Arriving at Quaker Lake in mid-morning, we gathered at the pavilion for instructions from Cal. He was brilliant, calmly emphasizing safety, cooperation, how to lay shingles, how to divide up in crews, and how to keep checking with one another to keep the work moving smoothly.

The crews began (with the lunch crew

peeling off to prepare lunch) and despite some banged fingers, by a late lunch break progress could be seen. The group’s pride began to build. Work that afternoon stretched beyond the dinner hour due to cries of “Just one more row, Don – please!”

The next days were very much the same with the enormous energy of early adolescence totally focused on the task. No arguments, some delightful light banter, easily switching crew jobs to evenly spread the work, and supportive care when someone smashed a finger. On the last day (we were leaving the next morning), crews began at dawn on a roof 2/3 finished. There were no breaks during the day. Lunch was eaten on the job.

And with pleading for a chance, and under some lighting, at 8:30 pm the roof was completed. There was a group hug, great pride in accomplishment, and many statements saying “See, we told you we could do it!”

As the happy and exhausted students were lolling about in the grass eating supper, Cal and I sat on a bench outside the lodge facing them, the Lake, and the finished pavilion.

We talked about the motley crew’s amazing accomplishment and their exemplary behavior – in every way. Then I said, “Cal, I think that you need to join the Friends School staff.” To my utter astonishment, he answered “Virgie and I were talking about that last night. We think that you are right.

Your students have convinced me.”

In August the Geiger family moved to Hillsborough, Cal joined the staff, and Edward became a student at Friends. Cal’s influence on the evolution of the School is evident in the best of Friends School. It is hard to conceive of its quality without thinking of Cal. And why did he choose to come?

Because he was so deeply inspired by that group of 14 students. They are to be credited with his recruitment. What a gift the motley crew bestowed on the School.

For an excerpt from Cal Geiger’s memoir Leadings Along the Way, and for a poem about Cal by Henry Walker, please see 27 Views of CFS.

Carolina Friends School 11

Whose House?!

Settling into Our New Home and Building Girls’ Basketball Teams

by Patience Vanderbush, Girls’ Basketball Head Coach 2001-2014

The following is excerpted from Patience’s reflection in 27 Views of CFS.

When I started coaching basketball at CFS during the 1998-1999 season, our school did not have a gym. In addition to not having any home games, we didn’t have a regular place to practice. When we got the opportunity to practice, we did so in rented elementary school gyms or in the open-air Quaker Dome, which was not heated and had a concrete floor. Needless to say, we did not practice taking charges or diving for loose balls, and the players sometimes wore winter jackets and even gloves while practicing.

Our gym was completed at the beginning of the following season, 1999-2000, and this was a momentous occasion for CFS basketball players. The class of 2001, my first as a head coach, put together a printed program for their senior night (i.e., final home game), in which several of the players identified their “favorite CFS basketball moment” as the first time they got to practice in the new gym.

Having a gym was essential to developing a competitive basketball program, as it not only provided a place to practice and play but was also the “ticket” to our admission to an athletic conference and the state independent schools athletic association. I believe it also provided the foundation for something more sublime: an opportunity to build the bonds of team and experience the joys of achieving success with a group of people who have worked hard together and shared a significant commitment of time and effort. One aspect of our girls’ basketball program that has brought me great joy over the years has been seeing our teams come together through shared rituals, some organic (springing up in the minds of the players from one season to the next) and some imposed (by me), some fleeting (serving the purpose of one particular occasion or team) and some enduring (passed along from one team to the next).

Suzanne Richardson, Class of 2001, said her playing days at CFS felt much more like a time of “firsts” than a time of rituals.

12 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

“Everything was SO NEW, nothing was routine,” she said. “We had only gotten a gym the year before, and it was so new we actually had a home court disadvantage because it was the gym we’d never played in.”. . .

The Class of 2005 was the first group of players to benefit from the experience of playing on our Middle School basketball team, another programmatic advantage of having a gym, and it was also the first class I had the opportunity to coach for four years.

This group started a team ritual, the pregame “Whose house?!” call-and-response cheer, that continues to this day.

After seeing the movie “Love & Basketball,” whose protagonist is a female basketball player, Lauren Kibbe and Larkin Rausher took a cheer used by the team portrayed in the movie . . . and adapted it for CFS teams.

The players put all hands in the middle, and the cheer goes like this: . . . “Whose House?!?” . . . “C’s House!!” . . . “Whose House?!?” . . . “C’s House!!” . . . “C!!” . . . “House!!” . . . “C!!” . . . “House!!” . . . “CFS on three…1, 2, 3!” . . . “CFS!!!”

“This chant connected our team to an example of pride and serious athletics,” said Lauren. . . . “It just really pumped us up.”

That pride and seriousness on the court were big factors in this group’s success, and they led our program to a new level of achievement in girls’ basketball, our first appearances in the 12-team NCISAA 2A state basketball tournament, in 2004 and 2005. Their pregame cheer (and what it represented) got handed down to each successive CFS girls’ basketball team. Kat McLaughlin (‘07) learned the cheer from her older teammates and helped to pass it along: “I remember being very excited when it was my turn as a captain to yell ‘Whose house?!’ and to hear everyone respond.”

Kat also remembers her pride in being a part of those first two state tournament teams and how meaningful it was when Carrie Huff organized and drove a bus of students to the 2005 state tournament game in Charlotte to support the team. In that game, we were the #11 seed and lost by 6 points to the #6 seed, and we walked off the court feeling proud of our effort and accomplishment. . . . Said Kat: “I can honestly say that

being a part of CFS basketball really contributed to the person I am today and is a huge part of the positive memories I have of Upper School.”

In subsequent years, another group of players gave new meaning to the ongoing “Whose House?!” cheer by tallying an amazing number of consecutive victories at home over a three-year period. After losing a firstround state tournament game at home in 2009, our girls’ basketball teams did not lose a home game during the next three seasons.

They also made history by winning our girls’ basketball program’s first of four consecutive conference championships in 2009 and achieving our first state tournament victory in 2010, before making state tournament runs all the way to the championship games in 2011 and 2012.

One hallmark of the teams over this period was their pregame rituals, which allowed them to make themselves “at home” wherever they played. After our pregame talk, the assistant coaches and I would always leave the locker room to let the players do their own thing, and hearing the ensuing ruckus in the locker room always made us smile. Zoe Vernon [‘12], and Lydia Youngblood [‘13], explained that they would always start by doing the sun salutation, followed by the “Waka Waka dance.” “We’d stand in a circle and sing the song [by Shakira],” Lydia said.

“We had a little choreographed routine that involved hand motions and dancing—it was the best.” The girls would end up by screaming in the huddle together and then break out in preparation to take the floor. “The sun salutation would calm us down, and then we would get excited as a unit with our dance,” Zoe said. For home games, they would also hit the wall in beat (to the tune of “We Will Rock You” by Queen) before running out on the floor. . . . “I think [these rituals] helped bring the team together before the game and allowed us to focus,” said Zoe. . . . The way that our team loved each other was part of what made us so special, and I think the pregame rituals helped build that camaraderie.”

Another ritual that was important to our teams over the years was that of dressing alike on game days. Some teams liked to dress up; others dressed “down.” . . . Said Kat, “Some games we had other themes, where we all dressed in fancy clothes, or we all wore hats, and so on. But those days when we matched really gave us all a place to

belong, a reason to feel safe in the confusing social world of high school. . . .”

While those pregame rituals developed organically, I also imposed some rituals on our team for teaching purposes. The coaches would designate pairs or groups of “rebounding buddies” prior to each game, and after each game, we would tally the total number of rebounds grabbed by each group of buddies and award chocolate truffles to the winners. Over the years, our postgame “truffle awards” expanded to include other important contributions to the team that don’t necessarily end up in the box score or get noticed by fans in the stands, including stepping up to take charges and dishing out a notable number of assists. . . . “That sort of competition not only improved us as players but also encouraged us to cheer for each other and be proud of our teammates’ accomplishments,” said Kat. While not a “ritual” per se, one of my fondest coaching memories at CFS arose from that team culture of coming together through singing and dancing. In the semifinal game of the state tournament in 2012, we had a sluggish first half and went into the locker room with a slim lead.

After having lost to Carolina Day School in the state championship game the year before, we had spent the next year working toward the goal of playing them again, and we were the #2 seed in the 2012 state tournament. While that was great motivation, it also added pressure to each state tournament game leading up to the championship. In the locker room, everyone was nervous and frustrated, and I didn’t know what to say to change our collective mood. Recalling a cheer we had heard another team’s fans chanting

earlier in the tournament, I started dancing and singing, “I believe that we will win! I believe that we will win!” If no one else had joined in, I would have felt pretty silly, but thankfully, everyone did, and we created a mid-game locker room ruckus together, players and coaches. “If we had lost that game it would have made our season a disappointment because we would not have had the chance to play Carolina Day,” Zoe said.

“There was just a sense in the locker room that we were all tense, and after you did that everyone relaxed and we went out there and played like ourselves.” We outscored our opponent by 19 points in the second half and earned the rematch with Carolina Day in the state championship game. While we didn’t win it, we walked off the court after the game with our heads held high and enduring bonds and memories.

In the 16 years that I coached US girls’ basketball at CFS, I had the opportunity to work with so many young women and different configurations of teams, each with its own unique personality, experiences, and achievements, yet also joined by rituals and team culture passed along from year to year.

For me, the “Whose House?!” cheer symbolizes the connection across all those players and teams, and hearing it has always brought me great joy. “The fact that the cheer lives on and that generations after us continue to use this as their home court cheer really impacts me as a former CFS athlete,” said Lauren. “It demonstrates a kind of continuity and commitment to maintain a serious attitude and respect for the sport and to honor those that created a space to shift our attitudes about women’s athletics in today’s world.”

Carolina Friends School 13

2013-14 Athletics-Year in Review

FALL 2013 MS Boys’ Soccer All Conference: Andre M (4th year) Mateo R-S (3rd year) MS Girls’ Volleyball All Conference: Sarah K (4th year) US Boys’ Cross Country All Conference: Dillon L (sophomore) US Boys’ Soccer #2 regular season finish in the conference #7 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Anthony B (senior) Knox E (junior) Henry F (senior) Doug M (senior) All State: Knox E (junior) Doug M (senior) US Girls’ Tennis #9 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Ellie M (senior) Player of the Year: Noor S (freshman) All State: Ellie M (senior)

WINTER 2013-14 US Girls’ Basketball #2 regular season finish in the conference All Conference: Allegra B (senior) Ainsley S C (senior) Conference coach of the year: Patience Vanderbush 14 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

US Boys’ Basketball All Conference: Josh B (senior) Matt G-H (senior) US Girls’/Boys’ Swimming All Conference: Jack SC (sophomore)

SPRING 2014 US Baseball #7 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Anthony B (senior) Matt G-H (senior) Darius H (junior) All State: Matt G-H (senior) US Girls’ Soccer #12 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Ainsley SC (senior) US Boys’ Tennis #10 seed and eventual semifinalist in the state tournament All Conference: David B (sophomore) Tate G (sophomore) All State: David B (sophomore) Tate G (sophomore) US Ultimate Frisbee State high school champions (USA Ultimate) Southern regional high school champions (USA Ultimate)

Marching Through The Mastheads

Adding to the History of CFS If you have items that can add to the understanding of CFS’s origins, activities, functions, events, staff, units, programs, culture, initiatives, policies, community, building and grounds, and/or changes over time--and you’d consider transferring them to the CFS Archives, where they will be lovingly cared for and preserved, please contact Pam Mayer, CFS Archivist (pmayer@cfsnc.org).

What sort of materials are we looking for?

4Posters, programs, and playbills for School events 4Yearbooks 4Parent Association records 4Student literary magazines 4Student newspapers 4Newsletters and blogs 4Textiles (e.g., a representative sample of sports uniforms & school t-shirts) 4Photographs & Videos of School events and student activities (e.g., dance, plays, sports, US end-of-year experiences, MS exploratorium)

4Newspaper clippings 4Awards and trophies We & Thee is published twice a year by

We & Thee has evolved as the School has, as documented by this sampling of mastheads that have appeared on the cover, from the early days when the publication was a mimeographed four-page newsletter to the current professionally designed and printed 24page, four-color publication.

Carolina Friends School 4809 Friends School Road Durham, NC 27705 Mike Hanas, Principal Anthony L. Clay, Senior Editor Carrie Huff, Guest Editor Kathleen Davidson, Editor Doug Johnston, Designer Laura Shmania, Staff Photographer Sunshine Scoville '90, 50th Photographer Brian Whittier '79, Sports Photographer Carolina Friends School 15

Congratulations, Class of 2014!

On Saturday, June 11, Carolina Friends School gathered in the gym for a Meeting for Worship with Attention to Graduation, centered on the 40 students in the Class of 2014. After a Meeting for Worship in which many meaningful messages were shared with the group, each student received a diploma and a hug from Principal Mike Hanas and Upper School Head Teacher Tom Anderson.

After a standing ovation, hugs were exchanged all ‘round.

16 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

The Members of the CFS Class of 2014 Jessica Ross Anderson Claire Suzanne Hochbaum Anderson Allegra Imani Berry Anthony James Berry William Lewis Booker Joshua Bryce Boone Jennifer Kenzie Brady Abraham Stein Eichner Henry Jackson Fisher McKenzie Lauren Floyd Matthew McKay Gayek Matthew Dale Gouchoe-Hanas Katherine Wrenn Hansen Eliza Eaves Harris Anna Caroline Kenan Eleanor Mei-Ming Kunz Douglas Max MacLeod Elisabeth Corbett Maillard Kyle Maxwell Lynn McConaughey Ellie Ayres McDonald Emily Anne Miller

William Patrick Pelletier Xela Phillips Kashauna Elaine Pointer Hope Elizabeth Pungello Emily Lauren Rodrigo Carson Jonah Rodriguez Jordan Edward Sanders Lucas Hawfield Selvidge Ainsley Bernice Dugan St. Clair Jack Thomas Stefan Gina Selene Azito Thompson Anna Kathleen Webster Abigail Margaret Westlund Justin Dimitri Williams YiQi (John) Yang Solomon Blake Yanuck Julian Alexander Young Alice Moskal Zelenak

The Colleges that the Class of 2014 Will Attend Bryn Mawr College Carleton College (3) College of William and Mary Davidson College Dickinson College Eckerd College Elon University (2) Emory University

Florida A&M University Furman University Guilford College (4) Hollins University McDaniel College Meredith College Miami University of Ohio NC State University

Pomona College Reed College Scripps College UNC – Asheville (2) UNC – Chapel Hill (5) University of Rochester Ursinus College Vassar College

Virginia Commonwealth University Wake Forest University Wellesley College William Peace University

Other Schools Offering Admission to the Class of 2014 Agnes Scott College American University Appalachian State University Bard College Bates College Bethany College Colorado College Connecticut College Denison University Earlham College East Carolina University Fashion Institute of Technology

Goucher College Greensboro College Hampshire College Haverford College Knox College Lewis and Clark College Louisburg College Macalester College Massachusetts College of Art and Design Moore College of Art North Carolina Central University

Oberlin College Ohio Wesleyan University Pitzer College Sacred Heart University Savannah College of Art and Design Skidmore College Smith College State University of New York – Stony Brook Tufts University Tyler School of Art

UNC – Charlotte UNC – Greensboro UNC – Wilmington University of San Francisco Warren Wilson College Washington University in St. Louis Wheaton College (MA) Wingate University Wittenberg University

Carolina Friends School 17

Welcome, New Staff VIOLA BESTMANN (Durham Early School – Extended Day Teacher) was born in Germany and left Hamburg in 1997 for North Carolina.

She now lives with Douglas, two daughters, Rosa Celina and Zoe Danielle, a cat, a bunny, and 6 chickens in downtown Durham.

Viola has been working as an Early Childhood Educator since 1992, she holds a German Diploma for Movement Education with an emphasis on Movement Therapy and Occupational Therapy. Viola is also a certified Developmental Movement Educator in the tradition of Body Mind Centering.

Viola has a background as a Dancer and Visual Artist and has been nourished and supported by her lifelong practice of mindfulness and meditation. She most recently worked with children age three to six at the Montessori Children’s House of Durham and is now happily sharing and growing her expertise and joy within the Friends community.

NATALIE DUNN (Tutoring Coordinator) a native of Eastern North Carolina, received her undergraduate degree from UNC-Chapel Hill in Education and History. She taught elementary school in both Hyde and Wake County. After 7 years of teaching she received her MS in Counselor Education from NCSU and has served as an Elementary School Counselor in both public and charter schools.

Natalie believes that students learn best when we focus on celebrating their individual talents and gifts. Building a student’s confidence is the key to creating successful learners.

She has 3 children, two of whom are currently attending the Middle School at CFS. In her spare time, she enjoys spending time with her family, being outdoors, gardening, and trying out a new recipe in the kitchen.

18 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

WILL FULKERSON ‘99 (Upper School – Statistics and PreCalculus) has a B.S. in Manufacturing Engineering from Boston University and a Master of Arts degree in Teaching from Duke University with a concentration in mathematics and physics. Prior to coming to CFS, Will worked as a researcher in mathematics and science education and taught mathematics at the high school level. In addition, Will is a graduate of CFS, having attended from Lower School through Upper School. Will is married with two beautiful children. He is the brother of Hopie Fulkerson-Mooney ‘97, who is a member of the CFS Board of Trustees.

NATALIE

SAPKAROV HARVEY (Lower School – Teacher and Librarian) enthusiastically joins the Lower School this year with four years' teaching experience and a passion for the library's role in education. A native of Chicago, Natalie earned her bachelor’s degree in elementary education and master’s degree in library and information science from Loyola University Chicago and the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, respectively. She started her career as an elementary school librarian in Urbana, IL before she moved to North Carolina where she became a middle school librarian in Chapel Hill, and incidentally, met her wonderful husband. Happily married and parent to a feisty furball cat, she enjoys reading, gardening, cooking, knitting, and riding rollercoasters. Natalie also serves on the Tech Team for the Lower School.

CAROLINE HEXDALL (Early School/ Lower School Learning Specialist) grew up in Lawrence, Kansas surrounded by books, a family of teachers, and big sky.

After being a devoted Jayhawk at the University of Kansas, she moved to South Carolina and earned her Ph.D. in school psychology. During a fellowship at the Center for Development and Learning in

Chapel Hill, she continued to specialize in serving individuals with developmental disabilities. Following, she worked as a clinical scientist at the now-named Carolina Institute for Developmental Disabilities at UNC for nearly 10 years, with much of that time serving as the consultant for school psychology for the North Carolina Department of Public Instruction. Wanting to return to the rewards of clinical work with all children and families, she went into independent practice in 2013 with an emphasis on the practice of mindfulness. Her professional interests include mindful parenting, mindfulness in children, particularly as it may benefit children with learning differences and disabilities, targeted assessment and intervention, and the development of reading. She is thrilled and honored to be working with inspirational teachers – children and adults at CFS. At home with her husband and exuberant children, she is never far from a camera, paintbrush, spatula, piano, or book.

MARY MCNALL (Middle School – Math Te a ch e r / A d v i s o r ) grew up in New York and Massachusetts and completed her undergraduate studies at Boston University.

She recently completed her master’s degree at NC State.

This is her 10th year living and teaching in North Carolina. She taught 6th grade math and science and was a math specialist for several years in Wake County before joining CFS. In her spare time she loves to play soccer and basketball, cook, travel, watch sports, and visit friends and family.

AMY PINE (Upper School – Language Arts Guest Teacher) has a B.A. in English with a minor in history from Syracuse University and an M.A. in Education from Antioch University in Seattle. Amy began her teaching experience at an Expeditionary Learning Outward Bound school in Seattle where she taught integrated English and history courses. She later moved to Brooklyn, New York, and taught both English and humanities classes in a social justice high school for students aged 17- 21.

When she moved to Durham in 2006, Amy taught English at Riverside High School.

After taking a bit of time off to spend with her new baby, she returned to the world of teaching at Durham Tech, where she continues to teach Developmental Reading and Writing part-time. Her most recent venture included working as part of a leadership team to create and implement a middle school program at Central Park School for Children. In the classroom, Amy is dedicated to helping students understand how the power of language, literature, and history can make a difference in their lives and in today’s world. When Amy is not teaching, she is tending to her chickens, dabbling in pottery, and exploring the history and many pockets of an ever-evolving Durham with her husband, Richard, and daughter, Zoe Mae. ABBY PRESSON (Upper School – Algebra I and Geometry Guest Teacher) joined CFS this year as a parttime guest teacher of Algebra I and Geometry. With a B.A. in Quantitative Economics and a master’s degree in Secondary Level Mathematics Education from Stanford University, she incorporates industry experience as a financial analyst and an IT recruiter into her instruction to help students recognize and appreciate the power of numbers. Abby has taught previously at schools in California and Virginia and, most recently, at Ravenscroft School in Raleigh where her three children are enrolled. An avid volunteer at Ravenscroft and her church, she also enjoys reading, tennis, watching a variety of sports, and spending time with family and friends.

LEARN (Cont’d from pg 3)

COMMUNITY (Cont’d from pg 3)

As Irene McHenry, former Executive Director of the Friends Council on Education, has noted: “Friends schools today practice a pedagogy that is continually changing to meet the needs of the students and respond to the needs of the world. We believe that knowledge and understanding are key ingredients to the achievement of peace and social justice. And, as colleagues in this work, we never stop awakening ourselves as educators, mentors, and leaders, stirring in ourselves and others new ways of perceiving and understanding.”

Learn on!

spirit rallies (that require no introspection) or honor codes (that attempt to codify integrity). Community is not formed by group cheering sessions or by reciting its rules and regulations.

This community that is the Carolina Friends School can appear to be a bit messy at times – not always neat and predictable as most schools strive to be. The School is not in the business of producing obedient and complacent students. Rather, its business is to produce thoughtful, introspective students. When a population of students and teachers are all engaged in this “whitewater experience” of becoming, it will at times be chaotic and unpredictable.

Visitors to the School would often say: Don, this school is totally unstructured. My reply: No, not unstructured, just differently structured. Structured in a way that each individual finds her own way rather than grouping students by chronological age.

(For, I might add, administrative ease, not pedagogical merit.)

The results of living and learning in this community are made manifest by the School’s graduates. Each has forged his/her educational journey bound tightly by those around them. Students get to know one another very, very well. The depth of their commitment to this School community is quite extraordinary. Graduate reunions are largely animated conversations that begin as though all had been together the day before.

Many graduates, if not most, are engaged in efforts to change the world for the better – fulfilling a central goal of the School’s mission.

In the silence of Meeting for Worship or just settling in to begin the day, the sense of community is palpable. It takes courage and discipline to sit in silence with your fellows.

Yet that experience is amply rewarded through the depth and breadth of community that emanates from the silence together. At the close of such sessions, recentered individuals are again prepared to engage – wholly – in community. Words are not needed to affirm that engagement.

SERVICE (Cont’d from pg 3)

learn “that it is possible to change the world” and to take steps to bring about a new world.

From Early School through Upper School the sense of community extends in an everwidening circle as students learn to appreciate connections between themselves and other people, and between what they learn and how they live. As they go into the world, they have gained valuable experience that they can make a difference, and that service brings joy and meaning, and is something that they want to continue for the rest of their lives. If Quaker education is to contribute to the creation of a more just, peaceful, and sustainable future, it will be through the lives of our students and graduates. When I was at CFS, a senior explained that she truly felt loved as a member of the School community, and this experience made her want to extend herself to love and to help others. She has gone on to do just that. As Willy Rotella [longtime and now retired Upper School Administrative Assistant and “Cruise Director”] once said to me, “At CFS, service is nothing out of the ordinary; it is just something we do naturally – like breathing!”

Carolina Friends School 19

CFS 50th Anniversary Celebration

The Community Quilt Project

by Carrie Huff, Co-Clerk of the 50th Anniversary Planning Committee As a part of the 50th Anniversary celebration, the planners hoped to incorporate a community art project during the 2014-2015 school year. The thought was to design a project that would allow all ages to participate in the creation of a lasting, permanent final product—something that would reflect the values of the School and memorialize its first fifty years. During the 2013-2014 school year, artists were invited to submit proposals to the Planning Committee and specifically the Arts Subcommittee. Carol Blackmore’s idea for a Memory Quilt was selected.

The Carolina Friends School Anniversary Celebration Community Quilt Project will help celebrate fifty years of Carolina Friends School community with a series of memory quilts that will bring together individual paper-based

20 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

“quilt” blocks made by all members of the CFS community who want to participate. The quilt concept of joining individual blocks into a collective unit is an inclusive process that will coordinate heartfelt contributions. Completed quilts will be displayed together in the large main CFS gym foyer.

Each quilt will be built by a different segment of the current and former CFS community, including students, parents, alumni, faculty, staff, and friends. Each of these different groups will have a different pattern to plug into.

Each block will express an individual interpretation, yet each quilt will be composed of repetitions of one pattern to create a unified look. Consistent construction techniques and materials for each quilt will add to design unification.

During the fall, groups met to experiment with patterns, decide on the best options,

and create a few finished panels to serve as examples. Individuals were invited to use these examples to work on their own.

Photo and photo collage blocks were an option. Text could be incorporated into blocks, or presented as just text. CFS recollections, stories, poems, and queries were all welcome.

In June 2014, to get the project started, Campus and Chapel Hill Early School students created a “pinwheel” theme. The students worked freely within the stencils which served only as a guide. Each block interpretation is different, yet each relates beautifully to adjoining blocks.

Each 32” x 40” quilt will be framed and hung with others of the same size in the gym foyer.

Thanks To Our Incredibly Generous Community, Our To-Do List Is Becoming a Ta-Da List! re and Enlargement Quaker Dome Enclosu New Greenhouse ge spaces ol teacher work & stora Chapel Hill Early Scho ion Middle School Expans b ker Space & Physics La New Upper School Ma ol Art Studio Enlarged Upper Scho ol Computer Lab Enhanced Upper Scho Six new Tennis Courts provements ent & infrastructure im atm tre ter wa s, ad ro w Ne ll Field Regulation size Baseba lp!)

Next Up (with your he 15 ion to begin Spring 20 Lower School Expans r 201?

Performing Arts Cente

* b * b * b * b * b * b * b * b * b * a * *

Thanks to those of you who helped us reach our $500K matching challenge. And, it’s not too late to help!

If you haven’t yet donated to the Building Friends Capital Campaign, there’s still time to help us finish our To-Do list and build a solid foundation for a brighter tomorrow for CFS students.

Also, we invite your ongoing support of the Friends of Friends School Annual Campaign. The Annual Fund helps provide the books, lab equipment, sports gear, art supplies, and more so our teachers can nurture 500

students today and throughout the year.

Lastly, your commitment through a gift made in your will, retirement account, or life insurance will help guarantee that CFS will be here forever and that the future is bright for thousands of students over many decades to come.

Learn more at www.cfsnc.org/2014FriendsCampaigns.

Together, we are providing for thousands of children’s todays, tomorrows, and futures.

Thank you!!

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Images from 50th Anniversary

22 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2014

There’s More to Celebrate

Events Last Fall

The 50th Anniversary celebration continues in the spring of 2015!

Please mark your calendars for these events!

Sunday, March 8, 3:00 pm Community Read: 27 Views of Carolina Friends School Friday, April 24 Evening Alumni welcome events in Durham and Chapel Hill Saturday, April 25 FriendsFest, Haw River Ballroom, Saxapahaw CLIP AND SAVE

Sunday, April 26, 10:00 am Campus tours Music by Nicholas Kitchen ‘83 Closing Meeting for Worship Sunday, April 26 Afternoon on-campus service project Contact Information: 50th Anniversary Planning Committee co-clerks: Carrie Huff (chuff@cfsnc.org) Will Gordon ‘01 (wtgordon@gmail.com) Jane Anderson (janeedithanderson@gmail.com) Alumni liaisons: Laura Shmania (lshmania@cfsnc.org) Lisa Hess ‘89 (lisa@dhess.com) Archives: Pam Mayer (pmayer@cfsnc.org)

Carolina Friends School 23

In The Next Issue of We & Thee:

LOOKING

FORWARD The Next 50 Years

Carolina Friends School 4809 Friends School Road Durham, NC 27705 919.383.6602 ADDRESS SERVICE REQUESTED

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