Clark & Addison _ Episode IV by Sportademics.Com LLC

Clark & Addison Episode 4 - “SPORTS ABUSE” A REUNION OF 20 SOMETHING CUB FANS ON THE CORNER OF CLARK AND ADDISON IN CHICAGO - IN A SMALL BAR NAMED WEAGHMAN’S PARK. THE CUBS ORIGINALLY PLAYED AT WEAGHMAN PARK IN CHICAGO BEFORE TRANSFERRING TO CUBS PARK IN 1919 - WHICH BECAME WRIGLEY FIELD IN 1926. NIGHTLY IN DEPTH DISCUSSIONS OF CUBS AND CHICAGO OCCUR AT WEAGHMAN’S PARK. WEAGHMAN’S PARK ONLY SERVES FOOD AND DRINK ORIGINATING FROM ABOVE THE WISCONSIN BORDER . . . SMALL NEIGHBORHOOD WRIGLEY FIELD BAR CALLED WEAGMAN’S PARK WITH ONLY WISCONSIN BEER AND SHEBOYGAN BRATS - A 20 SOMETHING HANGOUT. FOLLOW THE HISTORY OF THE CUBS, BEARS AND BULLS AS SEEN THROUGH THE EYES OF JOSH, ELLIOT, SAM, KERI, MELANIE AND FRIENDS . . . JOSH HEY WILL, WE’RE ABOUT TO GET SWEPT ! WILL BY ARIZONA OF ALL TEAMS. JOSH THEY HAVE NO NAME PLAYERS ON THEIR TEAM. WILL THEY DO NOW. JOSH I KNOW IT’S HARD TO NAME ANY OF THEM. WILL WELL THEY FLAT OUT BEAT US TO DEATH. JOSH YEAH, WE’RE NOT EVEN CLOSE IN A SINGLE GAME. WILL I FEEL LOU’S TEAM RAN OUT OF GAS AT THE END AFTER THE STRUGGLE TO GET THE CHAMPAIGN FOR THE DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP. JOSH IN FACT THE CUBBIES WILL BE ABLE TO HOIST ANOTHER BANNER ONTO WRIGLEY. WILL I’LL DEFINITELY BUY A SHIRT. AND ONE FOR KERI.

JOSH WILL, LEAVE HER ALONE. SHE’S BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH. SHE DOESN’T WANT A WASHED UP JOCK ANYWAY. WILL I WAS JUST THINKING........ JOSH NO WILL, IT’S THAT YOU’RE NOT THINKING. YOU RUN ON HORMONAL DRIVE 110% - NO COGNITIVE REFLECTION ABOUT THINGS. BESIDES YOU’VE GOT WORK TO DO IN HIGHLANDS PARK. WILL NO I DON’T. JOSH WHY IS THAT ? WE’VE ALREADY DISCUSSED THIS ONE AND DECIDED ON A COURSE OF ACTION. WILL JOSH, NONE OF THAT GARBAGE WORKED - THE CAR, SUIT, 5 O’CLOCK SATURDAY MASS, BEING COOL. JOSH HOW DO YOU KNOW ? WILL WELL SHE CALLED AND SAID JUST TO COOL AND WE’D BE FRIENDS. JOSH OH, THAT IS A SIGN OF DEATH IT IS OVER BIG TIME. SORRY ! WE TRIED ! WILL WELL SHE SOUNDED LIKE SHE WAS DIRECTED BY THAT BITCH MOM OF HERS ANYWAY - SO I’VE DECIDED TO MOVE ON. JOSH SO HOW ARE YOU MOVING ON ? WILL BY GOING OUT TO OHARE AND PLEADING FOR THE MECHANIC APPRENTICESHIP. JOSH SOUNDS COOL. WILL YOU DON’T THINK THERE ARE OPENINGS AT WEAGHMAN’S PARK DO YOU ?

JOSH WILL, FIND YOUR OWN GIG. I REALLY DON’T THINK THIS WOULD WORK FOR YOU. I’M ONLY DOING IT FOR NOW - AND WHO KNOWS HOW LONG NOW LASTS. WILL I GUESS SO. I’M STILL UPSET ABOUT THE CUBS JUST FLAT OUT HAVING NO PUNCH IN THE PLAYOFFS. JOSH IT WAS A GOOD COMEBACK SEASON TO GO PAST THE BREWERS AND I THINK WE USED UP ALL THE GAS IN THE TANK IN SO DOING. WE HAVE TO TAKE CREDIT FOR THAT AS MILWAUKEE WAS ACTUALLY BEING GIVEN THE DIVISION IN AUGUST - BUT THEY CAME BACK TO US AS NOT UNEXPECTED. WILL WELL IN GAME 1 SORIANO WAS 0 FOR 5. WE HAD 9 STRANDED RUNNERS IN SCORING POSITION, AND EVEN CARLOS DOUBLED. WE WERE 1 FOR 20 WITH OUR TOP 5 HITTERS. JOSH NOT BAD WILL - BUT AS YOU CAN SEE THIS WON’T GET IT DONE. IN FACT ALFONSO WHIFFED 3X IN GAME 2. WILL BUT WOOD HAD 2 GREAT INNINGS OF RELIEF. MAYBE HE’LL CLOSE NEXT YEAR. JOSH BUT HE’LL PROBABLY BE GONE AFTER THIS YEAR AS CHICAGO - EVEN THE SOX FANS ARE TIRING OF PRYOR AND WOODS. WILL I THOUGHT LILY WAS REALLY STRUGGLING IN THAT GAME - AND FINALLY LEFT IN THE 4TH. JOSH THE KEY WAS THE DIAMONDBACKS - DOUG DAVIS, THEIR STARTER, PLAYED GREAT. CHRIS YOUNG HAD A 3 RUN HOMER. GIVE THEM CREDIT. WILL WELL GAME 3 WAS A JOKE. KERI NO KIDDING. I DON’T KNOW IF I’M GOING TO ANOTHER GAME. WILL HEY KERI HOW YOU DOING ?

KERI NOT WELL - I’LL TELL YOU GUYS IT LOOKED LIKE A FUNERAL PROCESSION AT WRIGLEY SATURDAY AFTERNOON WITH THE GAME 3 LOSS. ALL THE HOPES AND DREAMS OF BREAKING THE CURSE WENT DOWN THE TUBES. JOSH I BET YOU LOST IT IN THE 5TH WHEN DEROSA HIT INTO A TWIN KILLING WITH THE BASES LOADED. WILL WELL RICH HILL WAS REALLY STRUGGLING ON THE MOUND ALSO. KERI BUT KENDALL HIT .355 FOR THE SERIES I HEARD ON WGN ON THE WAY OVER HERE. JOSH BUT DON’T FORGET THESE NO NAME DIAMONDBACKS LIKE HERNANDEZ PITCHED REALLY WELL. THEY DESERVED IT AS MUCH AS I HATE TO ADMIT. WILL SO HOW DID YOU GET TICKETS KERI ? ELLIOTT GET YOU SOME ? KERI NO ELLIOTTPER TRIED, BUT I ACTUALLY DID WORSE. WILL HOW SO - THE ELLIOTTPER AIN’T SO BAD. IN FACT HE’S KINDA COOL I THINK . KERI WELL I TOOK THIS SUBSTITUTE SOCIAL WORK JOB AND THEY HAD THIS BLIND DATE WITH A GUY WHO HAD TICKETS BEHIND HOME PLATE. AND THEY SAID HE WAS 28, SUCCESSFUL, CUTE, AND WANTED A DATE. THEY ALL LOOKED AT ME BECAUSE I WAS TALKING CUBS BASEBALL. JOSH SO YOU WENT. I THOUGHT BLIND DATES DIDN’T EXIST ANY LONGER - I THOUGHT SPEED DATES REPLACED BLIND DATES OR THE INTERNET DID IT ALL. WILL A BLIND DATE ! MY GOD KERI, HE COULD’VE BEEN CHARLES MANSON. ALL THESE GUYS START OUT GOOD LOOKING. JOSH AND THEY ARE MONSTERS. WELL WHAT HAPPENED ? KERI HE TOOK ME OVER TO HIS NORTH LAKE SIDE PALACE AND SAID HE USUALLY DID THINGS IN REVERSE ON DATES.

JOSH ON MY GOD, KERI. DID YOU RUN ! KERI NO I WAS COOL. I REALLY DID WANT TO GO TO THE GAME. AND THIS WAS THE ONLY WAY. I TOLD HIM THAT IT WASN’T MY WAY. WILL SO WHAT NEXT ? KERI HE SAID WE WERE TO MEET UP WITH SOME FRIENDS - SO WE WENT TO ANOTHER CASTLE FURTHER NORTH. WILL AND IT WAS A SWAP DEAL OR SOMETHING WEIRD. YOU SHOULD BE RUNNING OR BOATING BY NOW. KERI NO, I WENT IN. REMEMBER HE HAD THE TICKETS. AND LO AND BEHOLD IT WAS HIS PARENTS PLACE - AND THEY WERE COOL. WILL I STILL WOULD BE RUNNING OR ASKING THE GRANDPA FOR A RIDE HOME. CAB - ANY ESCAPE. KERI WELL THEY THOUGHT WE HAD BEEN DATING QUITE A WHILE AND I HAD TO CORRECT THAT. AND THE FOOD WAS PREPARED BY THEIR PRIVATE CHEF. JOSH SO THIS GUY ISN’T SO BAD AFTER ALL. WILL NO JOSH - HE IS A BIG NORTH SIDE CREEP AND HIDES IT WITH HIS MONEY. KERI OK, WE THEN WENT TO THE GAME, HE APOLOGIZED AND WE SAT RIGHT BEHIND HOME PLATE. JOSH WATCHED EVERY CUB STRIKE OUT. I BET THAT WAS FUN. SO WHAT NEXT. KERI WELL AFTER THE LAST OUT, I THOUGHT OF TAKING HIM OVER HERE TONIGHT, BUT THEN I THOUGHT I DIDN’T WANT THIS CREEP IN OUR LITTLE CLUB.

WILL GOOD PROCESSING KERI. WE DON’T WANT HIM HERE EITHER - EVEN IF HE DOES HAVE SEASON TICKETS WE COULD USE NEXT YEAR. JOSH SO ARE YOU GOING BACK TO THIS WELFAROLOGY JOB THEN ON MONDAY AND HAVE TO DEAL WITH THESE PEOPLE WHO LINED YOU UP AND TELL THEM THIS GUY IS A MONSTER ? KERI NO, I LET THEM KNOW I APPRECIATED THE WORK AND I WOULDN’T BE BACK. I SHOOK THE MONSTER’S HAND AND SAID THANKS BUT DON’T CALL - AND HE LEFT. WILL YEAH, YOU’LL READ ABOUT THIS GUY IN THE TRIBUNE NEXT MONTH. JOSH BETTER YET, HE’LL MAKE GRETA ON FOX. YOU HAVE TO BE PRETTY BAD TO MAKE HER SHOW. WILL JOSH, THIS GUY BEHIND ME WANTS BABY SWISS WHEN YOU GET A CHANCE. AND THE RUSSIAN LEINIES - THE RUSSIAN STOUT ! IT’S FINALLY IN - ALL THE WAY FROM THE NORTHWOODS. JOSH COMING RIGHT UP SIR. KERI SO WHY DOES THIS GUY COME IN HERE WITH A SOX JACKET ON ? IS HE LOST ? JOSH NO, I THINK HE’S A SCOUT. THE SOX SCOUTS ARE ALL OVER. THEY ARE LIKE OZZIE - YOU CAN NEVER TRUST THEM. THEY WEAR SOX JACKETS SO NO ONE WOULD EVEN THINK THEY ARE SOX SCOUTS - JUST DUMB LOST FANS. BUT THEY MIGHT BE PICKING UP TIPS IN THE CLARK STREET BARS. THEY ARE WORSE THAN THE KGB. KERI OK - IT LOOKS LIKE CANNING WILL BUY THE TEAM ALL OR IN PART FROM THE TRIBUNE - NOT MARK CUBAN - THAT WOULD MAKE TOO MUCH SENSE TO HAVE A VESTED INTEREST GUY AT FIRST BASE EVERY DAY WITH A CHEERLEADING ACT. JOSH WELL I STRONGLY THINK CUBAN WOULD’VE BEEN THE GUY - BUT SELIG DIDN’T WANT HIM - NOR DID ANY OF THE OTHER OWNERS - THEY WERE SCARED WRIGLEY AND THE CUBS WOULD’VE BEEN ANOTHER GODZILLABRENNER FAMILY.

KERI WELL WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING - AT LEAST MARK CUBAN WOULD’VE WILLED THESE GUYS TO WIN IF LOU COULDN’T. WILL I’M STILL WORRIED ABOUT FREE AGENCY GUYS LIKE KENDALL WITH THE .355 IN THE ARIZONA SERIES. AND WOOD WILL PROBABLY GO FREE AGENCY - MAYBE EVEN TO THE SOX. JOSH DON’T CONFUSE OUR PATRON WITH THE SOX JACKET ON. WILL OH, HE SAYS HE WANTS ANOTHER RUSSIAN AND ZUERCHER SANDWICH....AND I TOLD HIM ZUERCHER’S WAS IN SKOKIE SO HE COULD ORDER FOR HOME IF THE FEE WAS $25 OR MORE. KERI WELL , WHAT DO WE DO WITH PRYOR ? I THINK HE NEEDS ACUPUNCTURE OR SOMETHING DIFFERENT. JOSH HE MAY GO TO ANOTHER TEAM AND KICK BUTT. THAT’S MY WORRY LIKE MILWAUKEE SO HE CAN KEEP HIS HOME HERE. WILL THAT WOULD BE HIGHLY DREADFUL. KERI OH HERE COMES SOME MORE BORDER PEOPLE LAUGHING ALL THE WAY AS WE GET BEAT THINKING THEY SHOULD HAVE REPRESENTED THE DIVISION. JOSH GIVE ME A BREAK KERI - THESE GUYS HAD IT MADE ALL THE WAY THROUGH SUMMER AND COULDN’T PULL IT OFF - LIKE 135 GAMES IN THE LEAD. KERI WELL, I JUST DON’T LIKE THE JOVIAL TONE OF THESE GUYS WHEN THERE IS AN ACTUAL CUBBY FUNERAL GOING ON RIGHT NOW. CAN YOU IMAGINE THESE GUYS EMPTYING OUT THEIR LOCKERS WITH LOU IN THE BACKGROUND. JOSH IT HAS HAPPENED 99 CONSECUTIVE YEARS. OUR CURSE IS FAR WORSE THAN BOSTON. WILL WELL WE HAD BETTER SHAKE IT UP, BECAUSE WINNING OUR DIVISION IS GOOD, BUT NOT GOOD ENOUGH - WE WANT THE PENNANT AND THE SERIES. THAT SIMPLE. 8

KERI OH HERE COMES SOME GIRLS WITH THE CUFFED BLUE JEANS. JOSH THESE ARE REAL BLUE COLLAR CUBS FANS. YOU CAN’T GO WRONG WITH ONE OF THESE GALS. THEY ARE SALT OF THE EARTH. KERI YES, THE ONLY PLACE I SEE BLUE JEANS ROLLED UP ARE BLUE COLLAR GIRLS IN CHICAGO AND ALL GUYS IN COLORADO FOR SOME REASON. YOU CAN SPOT THOSE GUYS A MILE AWAY. WILL WOW, A COUPLE OF THEM ARE CUTE ALSO. KERI DON’T GET IDEAS WILL. EVERYONE IS IN MOURNING. DON’T FLIRT WHILE A FUNERAL IS GOING ON - SERIOUSLY. JOSH WELL WE’VE GOT THIS NEW SHIPMENT OF CHEDDAR FROM ZUERCHER’S THIS WEEK WHICH EVERYONE IS RAVING ABOUT. THEY FEEL THE MORE BITTER THE BETTER. WILL I CAN’T STAND THAT STUFF - I’LL TAKE BABY SWISS OR MUENSTER. KERI THEY ARE FLAT OUT COOL - NO GUYS HANGING ON THEM - JUST PLAIN CUB 20 SOMETHING FANS. WILL I’LL LET THEM HAVE THEIR WAKE AND THEN ATTACK. KERI WILL, YOU CAN’T SUPPORT YOURSELF - LET ALONE A WOMAN. YOU NEED TO GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER LIKE REAL SOON WILL. WILL OK, MOTHER KERI, I’LL FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS. KERI RELAX, LET THE GAME COME TO YOU. WILL YOU SOUND LIKE A COACH. JOSH WELL I CAN ACTUALLY HEAR THOSE GALS TALK. THEY’VE MOVED ON HECK THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT THE BEARS.

WILL I COULD FILL THEM IN ON EVERYTHING. KERI LEAVE EM BE WILL. THIS IS A STATE FUNERAL. JOSH MY GOD THE CHEESE IS FLYING OUT OF HERE SO FAST TONIGHT THAT WE MAY RUN OUT BY MIDNIGHT. KERI HOW IS THE BRAT SUPPLY ? JOSH THAT IS LOW TOO ? I’D BETTER CALL THE OWNER AS HE HAS SOME HIDDEN IN HIS GARAGE FRIDGE. KERI WELL HE HAS A GOOD GIG HERE AT WEAGHMAN’S PARK. GOOD START FOR NEXT YEAR. JOSH WELL WE’RE TALKING ABOUT ADVERTISING - EVEN THE INTERNET. WILL WELL FOLKS DON’T GO TO THE INTERNET TO FIND WEAGHMAN’S - THEY JUST GRAVITATE HERE BY WORK OF MOUTH. TRUST ME - THAT’S HOW I CAME. JOSH WELL THEY USE THE INTERNET AT THE U. OF CHICAGO WILL - MAYBE THEY DIDN’T AT NORTHERN. KERI DO YOU SEE THAT STUD THAT HAS A CUBS DRESS SHIRT ON. HE IS DEFINITELY CUTE. AND ............OH I GUESS HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. WILL WELL THESE GUYS BEHIND ME THINK THE BEARS WILL EASILY WIN THE SUPER BOWL. KERI AND THEY THINK THE SOX WILL WIN THE SERIES NEXT YEAR ALSO. WILL OH MY GOD THE BEARS ARE ALMOST OUT OF THE PLAYOFF NFL PICTURE ALREADY. JOSH YES, ANGELO’S TIES TO THE GATORS HAVE KEPT REX IN THE LINEUP FAR TOO LONG.

KERI THE WHOLE TOWN HOLDS THEIR BREATH EVERY TIME REX GOES BACK TO PASS. JOSH WELL THE THING I DON’T GET IS THAT LOVIE HOWELL SMITH GOES RIGHT ALONG WITH IT. WILL THAT’S REALLY LOVIE’S NAME ? KERI YES AND IT DOESN’T MATTER - WE WANT WINS, NOT CONTROVERSY. WE’VE HAVEN’T HAD A QB SINCE MCMAHON. WE NEED A REAL GUY BACK THERE. JOSH WELL HOLD THE PHONE - WE’RE ONLY 1 AND 3 AND WE COULD BEAT THE CHEESEHEADS THIS WEEKEND. KERI WITH LOSSES TO SAN DIEGO, DALLAS AND DETROIT - WE AREN’T GOING ANYWHERE. JOSH BUT WE BEAT THE CHIEFS. WILL HECK, GARY COULD BEAT THE CHIEFS. KERI WELL LOVIE IS TAKING DIRECTION FROM ANGELO AND THE BOSSES. HE DOESN’T CARE ABOUT WINNING - ONLY GREEN STUFF. WILL WELL RUMOR HAS IT ANGELO IS THE ONLY GUY WHO VOTED AGAINST CUBAN GETTING INTO THE NBA - SO FORGET ABOUT THE CUBS HAVING CUBAN AS THEIR OWNER. KERI I THINK CUBAN SHOULD BUY THE BEARS, CUBS, WIRGLEY AND SOLDIER FIELD - THE WHOLE THING. JOSH WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING. DO YOU REALLY THINK HE’S THE GUY THOUGH ? KERI HECK YES - WE WANT SOME SPIRIT ON THESE TEAMS - HECK THE BEARS LOOK LIKE ANOTHER SLOW FUNERAL PROCESSION.

WILL WELL I DON’T LIKE IT WHEN THOMAS JONES CARRIED THE ENTIRE LEAGUE AND CITY OF CHICAGO FOR 4 YARDS REPEATEDLY LAST YEAR - AND THEY LET HIM GO. MY GOD THE GUY IS A WINNER. JOSH WELL THE BEARS HAVEN’T EVER UNDERSTOOD OFFENSE SINCE JOHNNY MORRIS. MAYBE HE SHOULD COME BACK. WILL WELL ONCE NAGURSKI SHOWED UP ON THE SCENES IN THE 30S THE BEARS HAVEN’T LOOKED BACK. IT’S BEEN 3 YARDS AND A CLOUD OF DUST, LOW SCORING, AND A PASSING GAME LIKE A RUGBY CONTEST. KERI WE DON’T EVEN LOOK FOR PASSERS IN THE DRAFT. WE MIGHT BECOME COMPETITIVE THEN. I KNOW CUBAN WOULD. HE’D HAVE TRYOUTS ON MICHIGAN AVENUE AND PROBABLY HAVE THE FANS VOTE ON WHO THEY THOUGHT COULD THROW THE BALL FOR US. WILL WELL YOU CAN’T HAVE THE TRYOUTS IN WRIGLEY BECAUSE THE FIELD WILL BE TORN UP FOR DRAINAGE TOMORROW. KERI WELL WE JUST FLAT OUT NEED TO DO SOMETHING. WE GOT TO THE SUPER BOWL LAST YEAR ON STRAIGHT DEFENSE. THOSE GUYS SHOULD BE DOWN SOUTH ON THE BORDER PREVENTING BAD GUYS FROM COMING IN. YA GOTTA SCORE TO WIN. WILL WELL SWEETNESS AND WILLIE GALLIMORE ARE GONE. WE CAN’T BRING THEM BACK. RED GRANGE DIED AND THE KANSAS CITY COMET SAYERS CAN’T PLAY ANYMORE EITHER. JOSH OK, I’VE GOT TO GET BACK TO WORK FOR A BIT. THE LEINIES IS FLOWING TONIGHT AMIDST THE TEARS. MOST PEOPLE ARE WONDERING IF THEY CAN HOLD THIS CUB TEAM TOGETHER. KERI WELL IF WE ARE ALL GONNA LIVE HERE WE SHOULDN’T HAVE TO TAKE THIS ABUSE BY THE BEARS ANY LONGER. MAYBE WE SHOULD GET A CONSTITUTIONAL PERMIT AND STOP TRAFFIC ON MICHIGAN AVENUE TO PROTEST THIS OFFENSE. WILL YES, THAT’S A GREAT IDEA KERI. IT WOULD GET NATIONAL ATTENTION - FOX, CNBC, CNN, SPERSTATION, WGN - ALL THE BIGGIES WOULD BE THERE. IT WOULD BE THE VERY FIRST PUBLIC PROTEST AGAINST A SPORTS TEAM. I THINK THE ENTIRE TOWN WOULD SHOW UP. WILL THAT FLY JOSH ? 12

JOSH WELL - IT’LL BE UP TO THE JUDGE, BUT IF IT’S REASONABLE, SERVES A PUBLIC INTEREST, AND DOESN’T INCITE REBELLION WE MAY BE OK. I’M NOT CERTAIN SHUTTING DOWN MICHIGAN AVENUE IS AN OPTION WE’D BE BETTER OFF STAGING THIS NEAR SOLDIER FIELD - ON PUBLIC PROPERTY. KERI WELL IF WE WENT ON PRIVATE GROUND - WE WOULDN’T NEED A PERMIT AND ALL THAT RED TAPE. JOSH BUT IT WOULD BE MORE EFFECTIVE ON PUBLIC PROPERTY. I’LL LOOK INTO IT - BUT DON’T WANT TO JEOPARDIZE MY JOB HERE. I MEAN OUR WEAGHMAN’S OWNER IS ON A ROLL - AND HE DOESN’T WANT KEY EMPLOYEES OUT IN THE SPOTLIGHT CAUSING TROUBLE. KERI BUT CONSTITUTIONALLY YOU CAN PROTEST JOSH - JUST LIKE WILL AND MYSELF. HE CAN’T FIRE YOU FOR EXERCISING YOUR RIGHTS JOSH NO I THINK IT’S A GOOD IDEA AND FUN - MAYBE IT’LL WAKE UP THE BEARS TO OFFENSE. WILL WE COULD BRING BACK MORRIS TO HOLD A SIGN. THAT WOULD BRING ATTENTION. KERI HE’S DOWN AT THE BAYLOR BEARS ANNOUNCING GAMES - HE DIDN’T LAST HERE IN CHICAGO BECAUSE HE WAS ONE OF THE GUYS WHO ACTUALLY COULD CATCH A PASS. JOSH WELL THAT WOULD BE TOUGH - JOHNNY IS HIGHLY RESPECTED AND I DON’T SEE HIM PROTESTING BEARS FOOTBALL IN MR. TOUGH GUY MIKE DITKA’S TOWN. KERI HECK DITKA WOULD PROBABLY BREAK UP THE RALLY - OR WE’D HAVE TO PAY TO RESTRAIN HIM. JOSH WELL ALL OF THIS WOULD GET NATIONAL AND EASILY LOCAL ATTENTION - WHICH IS WHAT WE WANT. KERI WELL MAYBE LOU SHOULD BE ON THE BEARS STAFF. I DON’T KNOW WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING BECAUSE THIS IS SPORTS ABUSE - JUST LIKE CHILD OR ELDERLY ABUSE - SO MUCH SO THAT WE NEED COUNSELING. 13

WILL CAN YOU SUE FOR SPORTS ABUSE JOSH ? JOSH WE NEED TO DO THE RALLY FIRST - BECAUSE JUST SUING IS THE CULTURAL WAY - LET’S FIND ALTERNATIVES - SUPPORT THE DRAFT, PROTEST WHEN WE SIGN MORE AND MORE DEFENSIVE GUYS AND LET FLEET HALFBACKS AND STRONG ARMS GO TO THE AFC. REMEMBER WE’VE BEATEN GREEN BAY RECENTLY. KERI I DON’T KNOW IF THAT MEANS ANYTHING ANYMORE - IS IT STILL A RIVALRY ? WILL HELL YES - ASK ANY PLAYERS OR COACHES OR FANS FROM THE BORDER AT WEAGHMAN’S. BEARS/PACKERS IS STILL A BIG DEAL. KERI WELL YOU JUST DON’T HEAR MUCH ABOUT IT ANY LONGER. THE SUPER BOWL REALLY CLOUDED EVERYTHING. WILL THOUGH HESTER RAN THE KICK OFF BACK - WE WERE OUT OF THE GAME SHORTLY THEREAFTER. WE CANNOT SCORE. I STILL THINK BRINGING MORRIS BACK FOR PASSING DRILLS MAKES SENSE. JOSH FORGET IT WILL - LOTS OF THINGS ARE LOST ART PER OUR PARENTS - LIKE CATCHING A PASS, FIELDING A SHORT HOP, AND FREE THROWS - NO ONE PLAYS PICK UP. THEY SHOW UP FOR PRACTICE AND EXPECT TO LEARN SKILLS THERE. WHAT A JOKE. WILL YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT - WHEN I CAUGHT MY BOMBS IT DIDN’T HAPPEN FROM PRACTICE - IT OCCURRED BECAUSE I ALWAYS HAD MY HANDS ON A BALL. JOSH YOGI BERRA SAID KIDS BASEBALL IS A JOKE AND SHOULDN’T BE COMPETITIVELY PLAYED UNTIL 8TH GRADE. HE ACTUALLY TIMED STUFF AND SAID THAT IN THE SAME TIME IT TOOK TO PLAY A BASEBALL GAME WITH ELEMENTARY SCHOOL KIDS WITH 2 - 3 AT BATS - THEY COULD’VE HAD 45 AT AT BATS PLAYING OLD FASHIONED WORKUP AT THE LOCAL PARK. WHO WILL BE A BETTER PLAYER ? KERI SO WE BRING MORRIS BACK TO PLAY PICKUP ? GET REAL GUYS ! WILL NO - BUT JOHNNY COULD ACTUALLY TAKE SOME GUYS AND DRILL SOME SKILLS INTO THEIR BRAINS AND BODIES TO NOT DROP PASSES. HECK THEY 14

DIDN’T EVEN COUNT DROPS WHEN MORRIS PLAYED BECAUSE MOST OF THE PASSES WERE CAUGHT. KERI EVEN T.O. AND MOSS DROP PASSES - BUT NOT THAT MANY. JOSH WELL - I BET THEY PLAYED PICK UP EVERYTHING - FOOTBALL, BASEBALL, BASKETBALL - YOU NAME IT - NOT TOTAL VIDEO GAMES. THEY HAD THEIR HANDS ON A BALL. KERI JOSH - THIS GUY OVER THERE IS SIGNALING FOR COLBY. DOES WEAGHMAN’s PARK CARRY THAT ? JOSH ZUERCHER’S HAS EVERYTHING THAT THE WISCONSIN COUSINS HAVE THEY WILL MAKE IT IF THEY DON’T HAVE IT. KERI HOW ABOUT CHEESE CURDS ? JOSH WE HAVE BAGS AND BAGS OF THESE. NEVER ENOUGH THOUGH - KIDS LIKE EM. KERI WELL, I’M A KID AND I WANT SOME. WILL THEY PUT ON WEIGHT KERI. YOU’LL STILL GET YOUR BLIND DATES BUT WILL FAIL ON E-HARMONY WITH ELEVATED LIPID LEVELS. JOSH SHUT UP WILL. LET HER ENJOY LIFE - THIS STUFF IN MODERATION IS OK. THE ONLY PEOPLE THAT OVER INDULGE ARE THESE BORDER GUYS THAT EAT BRATS FOR BREAKFAST. KERI SO YOU’LL GO DOWN TO THE COURTHOUSE ON MONDAY AND FILE FOR A PERMIT - WORDING IT CAREFULLY FOR A PUBLIC AREA NEAR AT OR NEAR SOLDIER FIELD WHERE WE CAN DEMONSTRATE ? PLEASE . WILL YES JOSH - YOU GOTTA DO IT. YOU’VE GOT THE MBA/LEGAL CREDENTIALS TO PULL THIS OFF. JOSH LET ME TALK TO MY BOSS FIRST.

KERI HE WON’T FIRE YOU - YOU HAVE AN ILLINOIS AND US RIGHT TO PROTEST PER THE FIRST AMENDMENT FREEDOM OF ASSOCIATION, SPEECH, AND ALL THAT - I REMEMBER THAT FROM COLLEGE - ONE OF THE VERY FEW THINGS I REALLY REMEMBERED. WILL AND NO OTHER NEWSWORTHY THINGS GOING ON THAT DAY - LIKE INVASIONS, I-90 SHUTDOWNS, PC STUFF. IT HAS TO BE A DEAD DAY. JOSH WHAT IF NO ONE SHOWS UP - OR THERE IS NO MEDIA COVERAGE ? KERI WE’LL INFORM THE POWERS OF THE MEDIA - YOU KNOW FOX, WGN, SUN TIMES FOLKS, ETC.. WILL THEY STILL MAY NOT SHOW UP - THINKING THIS IS A FARCE. KERI WELL THEN WE NEED TO COME UP WITH SOMETHING THAT REALLY GETS EVERYONE’S ATTENTION. WILL A ONE AND THREE RECORD DOESN’T ? GIVE ME A BREAK ! JOSH WE DIDN’T PROTEST THE CUBS IN JUNE WHEN THEY WERE FIGHTING AND COULDN’T FIELD A GROUNDER. KERI THIS IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT JOSH - TOTALLY APPLES AND ORANGES. THE CUBS HAD LOU AND WE KNEW WE WERE A PRETTY DECENT TEAM - BUT JUST HADN’T PLAYED LIKE IT. THE BEARS ARE NOT ALL OF A SUDDEN GONNA SCORE 50. JOSH UNLESS LOVIEPUTS HESTER IN THE BACKFIELD. WILL I WILL ADMIT HE’S REALLY THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN GO NORTH SOUTH OR KNOWS WHERE THE END ZONE IS. KERI LOOK JOSH - YOU AREN’T GONNA LOSE YOUR JOB OVER A BEARS PROTEST. IN FACT THE OWNER OF WEAGHMAN’S MAY LOOK AT THIS AS A WAY TO GET MORE BUSINESS - SPIN IT THAT WAY IF YOU MUST TELL HIM FIRST MAYBE HE’LL WANT TO JOIN IN THE PROTEST. WILL AND WE PROBABLY WON’T GET MORRIS UP HERE TO HOLD A PROTEST SIGN THAT SAYS PASS ON FIRST DOWN OCCASIONALLY. 16

KERI I DON’T KNOW ANY OTHER WAY. JOSH WELL THEY PROTESTED IN TIANANMEN SQUARE IN 1989 AND THERE WAS A MASSACRE. KERI SO YOU THINK THE BEARS AND THE CITY OF CHICAGO WOULD MASSACRE US IF WE STARTED PROTESTING FOR MORE OFFENSE. GIVE ME A BREAK JOSH. YOU ARE THE CONSTITUTIONALIST . HECK IF YOU DON’T WANT TO ASK FOR THE PERMIT AS AN ATTORNEY - WELL THEN I’LL DO IT. YOU ARE A PANSY. JOSH CHILL KERI, I NEED TO REVIEW SOME STUFF ABOUT CHICAGO LAW, PERMITS, AND TRAFFIC. I JUST DON’T WANT TO GO DOWN THERE AND BE SHUT OFF TOTALLY FOR DOING STUPID STUFF. AS AN ATTORNEY YOU PREPARE. KERI OK, YOU’VE GOT A WEEK - BECAUSE I CAN GUARANTEE YOU BY THE TIME WE GET OUR PERMIT - WE’LL BE LEAGUE LAST IN STATS WITH OUR OFFENSE. WILL WELL THAT AREA BY NORTH BURNHAM PARK LOOKS GOOD - IT’S NEAR SOLDIER FIELD AND THERE ARE PEOPLE WALKING BY. JOSH AND LET’S GO RECRUIT THE ACLU, MADISON AND JEFFERSON’S RELATIVES, THE COMMISSIONER, DALEY, OBAMA, AND WHOEVER ELSE WE CAN. I NEED TO STUDY THIS GANG. KERI ONE WEEK - YOU WON’T KNOW ANY MORE IN MORE TIME THAN THAT - BESIDES YOU’RE OUT OF SCHOOL AND NEED TO KEEP YOUR LAWYERING SKILLS UP. AND THE CUBS SEASON IS OVER EXCEPTING ALL THE RECRUITING AND FREE AGENCY STUFF WE’LL BE DOING. WILL DO IT FOR US JOSH. IT’S SPORTS ABUSE. HEY HERE COMES ELLIOTTPER. STILL LOOKS SCRAGGLY TO ME. KERI HEY ELLIOTT - WHAT ‘S UP ? ELLIOTT OH JUST THE MOURNING GOING ON TONIGHT - BUT I’M MOURNING ABOUT OTHER STUFF.

KERI OK BABY ELLIOTT - WHAT IS WRONG NOW ? ELLIOTT I JUST MISSED THE PART IN CYMBELINE AT THE CHICAGO SHAKESPEARE THEATER AT NAVY PIER - EVEN AS AN UNDERSTUDY. WILL WELL ELLIOTTPER - I MEAN ELLIOTT, I KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE. ELLIOTT I DOUBT IT WILL, I HAD PRACTICED FOR 3 SOLID MONTHS TALKING IN PARKS AND ON THE L - I REALLY HAD THE ACTING, EMOTIONS, WORDS EVERYTHING DOWN - YOU JUST SHOWED UP FOR THE BEARS AND THEY TIMED YOU IN THE 40 AND SAID CUT OR PC TAXI SQUAD. WILL WAIT A MINUTE ELLIOTT - IT WAS A BIT MORE THAN THAT - I WORKED OUT 3X A DAY FOR 3 MONTHS - JUST LIKE YOU AND MY 40 TIME WAS 4.39. ELLIOTT BUT YOU COULDN’T CATCH A PASS - OR LOVIETHOUGHT YOU COULDN’T BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU’D STILL BE THERE. WILL YA HAVE TO UNDERSTAND ELLIOTT THAT THEY HAVE PAID PLAYERS THAT THEY MUST PLAY WHETHER THEY PLAY OR NOT - AND IF I BARELY BEATEM THEM OUT - WELL THAT IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH BECAUSE THEN THEY HAVE TO PAY FOR 2 WIDE OUTS. ELLIOTT WELL THEN FROM WHAT I’M HEARING YOU LOAFED BECAUSE WE AREN’T GETTING IT DONE THIS YEAR OFFENSIVELY - YOU CAN BLAME REX AND ALL THAT - BUT IT IS THE WHOLE TEAM - TRUST ME. KERI I’VE TOLD WILL TO PARK ON LUVY’S SIDEWALK AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS. JOSH BETTER YET - IF WE HAD A PICKUP GAME FEATURING WILL ON LUVY’S STREET THAT WOULD EASILY SELL WILL. KERI ANOTHER PERMIT JOSH. JOSH NO WAY KERI - I’LL BE KNOWN AS THE CHICAGO PROTESTOR AND I DON’T WANT THAT - EVENTUALLY I’LL BE DOWNTOWN IN THE WORKFORCE AND I DON’T WANT EVERYONE SAYING “ OH - YOU’RE THE GUY WHO PROTESTS EVERYTHING “

ELLIOTT WELL I THINK IT WOULD GET YOU A JOB PERSONALLY - CLIENTS WOULD WANT TO HAVE THE BURNHAM PROTESTOR WORKING FOR THEM. JOSH WHERE DID YOU HEAR THIS STUFF ANYWAY ? ELLIOTT OH - THEY’RE TALKING UP THE CONVERSATION FROM WEAGHMAN’S AT BERNIE’S TONIGHT - SOME LOUD MOUTH SAYS THE CLUB AT WEAGHMAN’S IS GOING TO PROTEST THE BEARS OFFENSE - WHICH I THINK IS A GREAT IDEA - AND WHILE YOU’RE AT IT - CAN YOU PROTEST THE SELECTION COMMITTEE AT THE CHICAGO SHAKESPEARE THEATER. KERI YOUR TIME WILL COME ELLIOTT. TRUST ME. YOU’RE TOO GOOD NOT TO GET A BIG TIME JOB IN THE ARTS. MY GOD ELLIOTT YOU CAN PLAY EVERY INSTRUMENT PERFECTLY.

End - episode 4, Clark and Addison