1C How to press the pause button

1C

How to press the pause button

Afew years ago Susan Maushart and her three teenage children began what they called “The Experiment”. For six months, as a family, they came off the grid and did a digital detox – no Wi-Fi, no internet, no music or video streaming, no smartphones. Normal life went on: they weren’t living in a shack in the outback. But it wasn’t the normal they had known up to that point. You can read about it in her wonderful book, The Winter of Our Disconnect. I’m not recommending this to everyone. And I love my smartphone! But most of us, most of the time, would admit that we are too busy and too stressed and in need of a detox. We are busy with work or studies; we are busy with family and relationships. And when we are not busy, we are desperately trying to be busy; when there is a gap or some downtime, we are desperate to fill the silence with noise and digital distractions. Adult internet usage in the UK averages about four hours per day, but it’s five hours for young adults, and six hours in the States.

We expect instant gratification: an immediate answer from Google, an immediate delivery from Amazon, all twenty-four

CHAPTER 1: THE SEARCH FOR HAPPINESS

episodes of the latest series on Netflix to binge-watch this weekend. It’s like being on water skis. We are going incredibly fast, and maybe having a great time, but we have absolutely no control over where the speedboat is taking us. So what can you do? At the student centre where I work we run a few de-stressing activities, especially during the exam periods: relaxation classes; counselling sessions; football in the park. And because this is England we also have afternoon tea. This year we did an experiment and gave out three hundred stress balls at church one Sunday, thinking that if all else fails it’s better to throw a small foam object across the room than a laptop out the window. But people are searching for more than rest or relaxation. There is a real hunger for stillness and silence, to step back from the rush of life and make space for reflection. It’s a human need; I’d even call it a spiritual need. It’s partly why mindfulness has become so popular today. It’s why most cultures, traditionally, have had a Sabbath day, a day of rest. Maybe this is coming back: I read recently that some supermarkets are experimenting with a ‘quiet hour’ on Saturday mornings when they turn the sound-system off. You can still shop as usual, but without the in-store music and announcements.

In the Bible, the prophet Elijah expected to find God in the noise of the wind and the earthquake and the fire, but in the end he found him just outside the cave, in the sound of sheer silence.

Many religious traditions speak about the symbol of the desert: leaving the city and the noise behind and going into the wilderness, in order to get some perspective. Not to escape to another world, but to rediscover what is truly important in your own world.

CHAPTER 1: THE SEARCH FOR HAPPINESS

This is hard! How can you create little moments of reflection, desert moments, when the kids are screaming and you’ve missed the latest deadline at work?

I really need one or two moments of stillness and silence each day, however brief. A little bit of quiet in the morning before I check my phone for messages; a brief pause before the next meeting; a short prayer at the end of the day. The poet TS Eliot said that there are some things we can only hear “in the stillness between two waves of the sea.”

I don’t know how you personally can press the pause button. It might seem impossible. I just know how important it is.

Questions for reflection

What helps you to relax and de-stress? What advice would you give someone who says they are too busy? How would you cope without your smart phone or the internet?

WISDOM FROM THE BIBLE

Psalm 46:10 The Lord says: Be still, and know that I am God!

Psalm 23:1-3 The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside still waters; he restores my soul.

Deuteronomy 4:29 You will seek the Lord your God, and you will find him if you search after him with all your heart and soul.

1 Kings 19:11-13 [The Lord said to Elijah] “Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.” Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence. When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave.

Matthew 7:7-11 [Jesus said] “Ask, and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for bread, will give a stone? Or if the child asks for a fish, will give a snake? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”

John 14:27 [Jesus said] “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not let them be afraid.”

John 16:33 [Jesus said] “I have said this to you, so that in me you may have peace. In the world you face persecution. But take courage; I have conquered the world!”

READINGS FROM YOUCAT Foreword – Pope Benedict XVI 279 to 290 – freedom and the search for happiness

LONGER READINGS FROM THE CATECHISM OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH 1716 to 1729 – the search for happiness 1730 to 1748 – human freedom

NB the numbers refer to paragraph numbers and not to page numbers.

CHAPTER 2

THE EXISTENCE OF GOD