Homefront november 2016 by Christ Community Church

NOVEMBER 2016

a spiritual parenting resource

Responsibili ty homefrontmag.com

GETTING STARTED

6 SHOW US YOUR GRATITUDE! #HF30DAYSOFGRATITUDE

36 TIRED OF COMPLAINING? TAKE THE CHALLENGE.

42 LOOKING TOWARD ADVENT.

We believe that the Holy Spirit is God’s chosen teacher. It is He who causes spiritual growth and formation when and as He chooses. As such, we have articulated 10 distinct environments to create in your home. We desire to create spiritual space, which we refer to as an environment, in which God’s Spirit can move freely. This month’s HomeFront focuses on the environment of RESPONSIBILITY. Before you dive into this issue, set aside your previous ideas about responsibility. While most of us associate that word with the burdens in our lives, the responsibilities God charges us with are exciting and life-giving! Open your mind and your heart to what He has to show you about taking responsibility for the kingdom He’s entrusted to you. This month, we will explore several areas of responsibility God charges us with. First, this concept of responsibility captures the idea that God has entrusted His kingdom to us. Next, this concept takes a look at our ability to take responsibility for our lives, gifts, and resources before God. Finally, our families must be challenged to care for both the spiritually lost as well as our brothers and sisters in Christ. We pray that the Holy Spirit will use this environment to allow each member of your family to be nurtured within a kingdom-minded worldview. As you explore the various facets of Christ-centered responsibility this month, may you experience God in ways that will lead you to celebrate the responsibilities He has entrusted to you.

Michelle Anthony

Executive Pastor: Parenting, Junior High, and Children | New Life Church Family Ministry Ambassador | David C Cook

CONTENTS FAMILY TIME Family Verse

Capturing the Season

Storytelling

Worship

Conversation Starters

Create

Game Time

Traditions

Family Time Recipe

Kids in the Kitchen

Prayer

God's Word

Tot Time Rhyme

Blessing

Taking Action

Global

30 Days of Gratitude

The Unmerciful Servant All We Have Been Given

Grateful Cards

Stuff the Turkey A Bowl of Grateful "Carpe Season" Pumpkin Dump Cake

Turkey Cheese Ball C.H.A.T. with God

The Parable of the Talents Lie Down

Noonday Collection Germany

Twitter @TruInspiration

INSPIRE, EQUIP, SUPPORT

OUR MISSION INSPIRE parents with ideas to create fun, spiritually forming times in the normal rhythm of everyday life. EQUIP parents to become the spiritual leaders of God’s truth in their own households. SUPPORT families to engage their communities and change the culture around them.

Student ID

Everyday Mom Blog

Everyday Dad Blog

Tough Topics

Marriage

Spiritual Grandparenting

Looking Ahead

Interruptible Unplanned Unparenthood Complaint Project

Fighting for Thankfulness

60-Second Blessing

Expressions of Gratitude

Design and layout by Stephanie Reindel | stephanie@homefrontmag.com Backdrops & Woodwork by Reclaimed Projects | Facebook: ReclaimedProjectsTX

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EDITOR'S NOTE I have the unique privilege of living with two of my grandchildren and watching my son—their daddy—take on the responsibility of caring for the children God entrusted to him. As a single dad, Kyle realized very early on that he would need to combat the inevitable “I feel different or less than” identity his children might embrace because they don’t have a mom in their lives. He knew it would be imperative to point out all they actually do have. From the earliest of ages, their nighttime prayers were filled with “thank yous.” It started simple: “Thank you for my home, thank you for my family, thank you for my food.” But now, at eight and five years old, the depth of their “thank yous” has increased. In fact, most of their prayers end with, “Our blessings are too many to count!” We hope this issue of HomeFront will help you and your family defeat the negative by embracing the positive as you realize that our blessings really are too many to count. In TOUGH TOPICS (page 38), Jennie Lusko shares with us how we must fight for thankful living. She and her husband, Levi, are daily inspiring others to see life through the lens of faith and not with the naked eye. Our EVERYDAY MOM BLOG (page 34) is a beautiful account about learning how to thank the God who gives and takes away. And STORYTELLING (page 8) this month shares the parable of the unmerciful servant found in Matthew 18:21–35. It is a great reminder that when we are truly grateful, our gratitude will overflow in service and blessing for others. Being responsible for the things and people God has created around us begins in our own homes. In this issue of HomeFront, we offer great resources for you to infuse your life with gratitude as you take responsibility for all that God has entrusted to you.

Debbie Guinn

Editor in Chief | New Life Church dguinn@newlifechurch.org

WWW.HOMEFRONTMAG.COM Things you won't want to miss: • Parent blogs to inspire you • Mobile-friendly format • Lots of downloadable giveaways • Marketplace to purchase article bundles and more! The website is filled with fresh ideas and creative resources to help you spiritually parent your children.

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FAMILY VERSE Memorizing Scripture can be an incredible practice to engage in as a family. But words in and of themselves will not necessarily transform us; it is God’s Spirit in these words who transforms. We come to know God more when we’re willing to open our hearts and listen to His Holy Spirit through the words we memorize. Have fun with this verse, and think of creative ways to invite your family to open up to God as they commit the verse to memory. Consider purchasing an 8" x 10" frame to hold your family memory verse each month!

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family time

c a p t u r i n g t h e s e as o n

30 �ays of Gra�i�ude #HF30DAYSOFGRATITUDE

IT’S NOT HAPPY PEOPLE THAT ARE THANKFUL; IT’S THANKFUL PEOPLE THAT ARE HAPPY! The environment of RESPONSIBILITY includes the challenge to take ownership for one’s life, gifts, and resources. One of the best ways to begin meeting this challenge is through a grateful attitude. Looking around with eyes of gratitude heightens our awareness of the blessings in our lives. Gratitude shifts our focus from what we lack to the abundance of what we already have! This month we want to encourage you to count your blessings and document them by using the hashtag #HF30daysofgratitude. Each day this month, choose something your family is grateful for, then snap a photo and post it to social media. Our HomeFront social media team will choose one photo from the hashtag each day to post on our HomeFront social media pages. Our hope is to flood this hashtag with everything from the simple to the profound. Together we can open the eyes of the next generation and help them recognize there is always something to be thankful for. As you snap your pictures, take one more quick step: Write a reminder of your photo on one of the leaf cutouts available from bit.ly/homefront30daysofgratitude. Using twine, tie these cutouts to a branch or a pumpkin and let your gratitude become beautiful décor to fill your home or holiday table. WHAT YOU’LL NEED

WHAT YOU’LL DO

• fall leaf download available from bit.ly/homefront30daysofgratitude

Snap a photo and post it using the hashtag #HF30daysofgratitude, then write a few words reminding you of your photo on the back of a fall leaf cutout.

Punch a small hole at the top of the leaf.

Cut twine to desired length and tie leaf onto a branch, a pumpkin, or another fall decoration.

• colored card stock • marker • hole punch • twine

by Debbie Guinn Debbie is the Editor in Chief of HomeFront. She has more than 25 years of experience working in children’s and family ministries. She is passionate about equipping parents to become leaders of God’s truth in their own households. Her most cherished time is spent hanging out with her grandkids—they are her favorite people on this planet! Instagram @homefrontsp Twitter @homefrontsp

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sto ry t e l l i n g

The Unmerciful Servant

Download a free coloring sheet from bit.ly/homefrontunmercifulservant so your kids can color as you read the story together! 8

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family time

sto ry t e l l i n g Joshua was speechless. No one had shown him this much kindness in all of his life. “Thank you, your majesty, thank you,” he whispered and he walked out of the throne room.

PARENTS This story is based on the parable of the unmerciful servant found in Matthew 18:21–35. This story reminds us that when we are grateful, our gratitude should overflow onto those around us. Spend some time talking about ways your family can let your gratefulness overflow to others.

As he left the palace, Joshua saw one of the workers he had hired to work on his farm. Joshua shouted at him in anger, “You! It is time for you to pay me back your debt! I lent you a day’s pay yesterday and I want that money now.” The worker fell to his knees and said, “Please, Joshua, be patient with me, and I will pay it back.”

A long, long time ago there lived a wise and powerful king. This king had many servants who worked for him in his fields, and every year the king gave each servant the money he needed to plant his crops, expecting that at the end of the year, the farmers would return that amount in full. This king was gracious and, from time to time, when people were unable to repay him, he simply asked them to pay up the following year.

Joshua looked at the man and scoffed. “I know your heart. You will never pay me back unless there is a consequence, so I am going to have you locked in prison until your debt is paid in full.” As he said this, guards rushed over and took the man away. Joshua began his journey back to his farm, feeling quite smug at having his worker thrown into prison. But what Joshua didn’t know was that many people had seen how he had treated his worker, and as Joshua walked home, they went to report everything to the king.

That time of the year came around again, and the king was ready to settle up with his servants. He called in his farmers and congratulated them on the abundant crops they had brought in that year. He began by settling accounts with the farmer who owed him the most money.

“He did what?” snarled the king. “I forgave his entire debt of 20 years and he threw a man in prison for one day of debt? Bring Joshua here at once!”

“Joshua, please come forward,” the king requested. Joshua was trembling. He could not pay his debts yet again this year. It had been 20 years since he had been able to pay. Slowly, he crept toward the king, bowing low to the ground as he approached the throne. Joshua knew his punishment would be severe.

Joshua heard the horses approaching. He moved off the road to allow them to pass. Once they came near, the guards turned to Joshua and said, “You are coming with us.” As Joshua walked alongside the horses, he began to sweat. Why does the king want to see me? What is he going to say? When Joshua finally arrived in front of the king he was again trembling with fear.

“Rise up, Joshua. You owe me 20 years of pay. Are you able to pay me back in full?”

“You wicked servant,” the king said. “I cancelled all of your debt because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have been grateful for what I did? Instead you showed none of the mercy I had for you to your fellow worker.” In his anger the king turned Joshua over to the guards to be thrown into jail until he was able to pay back every penny he owed.

Tears began to well up in Joshua’s eyes. “No, your majesty.” “Guards, arrest this man and his wife and his children. Throw them all into prison until the debt is repaid.” Now the tears were streaming down Joshua’s face and he fell to his knees. “Be patient with me,” he begged, “and I will pay back everything.”

by Krista Heinen

The king looked at Joshua and had pity on him. “I know you will never be able to pay back this debt. So today, in front of these witnesses, I am cancelling your debt! You owe me nothing. Go and be free.”

Krista is the NextGen Associate Pastor at Elmbrook Church in Brookfield, WI. Krista helps equip and support the families at Elmbrook through resources, events, and conversations. Twitter @KristaHeinen

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wo r s h i p

All We Have Been Given

We rarely pause to reflect on all God has given us. When asked, “What are you thankful for?” images of a few key things jostle in our minds—family, friends, health. Sometimes the challenge is to dig deeper and discover how much more God has graciously entrusted to us. The reality is: God has entrusted us with His world. He has given us gifts, resources, relationships, and opportunities that He intends for us to steward well. We have a responsibility to use all He has given us to bring Him glory. The first step in fulfilling this responsibility is to acknowledge the specific gifts, resources, relationships, and opportunities God has given us or entrusted to us, and then thank Him for these things. This month, choose a time to gather as a family and play a game, entering into gratitude as a form of worship. You’ll need a ball (a balloon, stuffed animal, or other small toy will work as well) and a device to play music. Choose one person to run the music, and have everyone else sit in a circle. Begin passing the ball or object around the circle, and play the music. Every 10 seconds or so, pause the music. When the music stops, whoever is holding the ball should name one thing God has given or entrusted to him. Then, play the music again and keep passing the ball. Continue playing until everyone has had a few chances to share. To deepen this experience, play a second round of the game. This time, ask everyone to dig deeper—ask each person to name one of our spiritual blessings in Christ! Let the older kids and grownups answer first, to set the example, but you may be surprised and delighted by responses from the younger ones, too! After the game, reflect on your experience and all the things that came up as you took inventory of what God has given your family. Discuss this follow-up question: "How does it make you feel to know that God has entrusted these gifts, resources, relationships, and opportunities to you?" As you wrap up your time together, pray and thank God for all He has given you, and ask Him to help you steward your lives, gifts, and resources well. by Emily Schulz Emily is the Director of Family Ministries at New Denver Church in Denver, CO. She is enjoying the newlywed life with her husband, Phil, and recently graduated with her MDiv from Denver Seminary.

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co n v e r sat i o n sta r t e r s

Grateful Cards These conversation cards are a great tool to empower children, young and old, to take ownership of starting a family dialogue about praising God and showing gratitude for what He has done. Cut out the cards and place them prominently in a place your family gathers—it could be the kitchen, the family room, or even the car. Pick a time of day when your family tends to be together, and encourage your children to remember to pick a card each day for two weeks (or a month if you want to repeat cards more than once). Simply read the card out loud to start the conversation. If your child can’t read yet, she can still be in charge of selecting the card of the day. You could rotate the responsibility each day, or each week. Read the verse and then have each member of the family answer the question that goes along with the verse. Encourage the child responsible for the day to pray afterward. If he is young, have him repeat after you while you pray. Affirm your children for showing responsibility by starting your family’s conversation and encouraging your family’s relationship with God. by Kelli Coltman Kelli is a mother of three with a passion to eat and share delicious food whenever possible. She is the director of Nurture—a gathering of moms—and a lay counselor with Life Care Counseling at ROCKHARBOR in Costa Mesa, CA.

PARENTS, DOWNLOAD AND PRINT THE CONVERSATION STARTER CARDS AT bit.ly/homefrontgratefulcards

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c r e at e

Stuff the Turkey Setting aside a day to be thankful can get lost in all the hustle and hype of the approaching Advent season. It’s not always easy to slow down and take the time to remember God’s faithfulness throughout the year. This turkey activity should help to make remembering a lot more fun! Create your faux roasted turkey together as a family during the first week of November, and then use it as a fall decoration on an entry table or as a centerpiece on your dining table. As you remember blessings, write them on colorful pieces of construction paper and “stuff” the turkey. Be sure to prompt ideas and transcribe notes for small children too! On Thanksgiving Day, gather together as a family to un-stuff the turkey and read the blessings out loud.

SING TO THE LORD WITH THANKSGIVING; SING PRAISES ON THE HARP TO OUR GOD. PSALM 147:7 NKJV WHAT YOU’LL NEED • 1 large paper bag

WHAT YOU'LL DO 1.

If your bag has printing on the outside, carefully take the bag apart, and then put it back together with the printing on the inside of the bag and the blank side on the outside.

Fold down the top about 4” toward the inside of the bag.

Fold the two front edges to one side and secure down with one staple to create the turkey's body. (Like you would wrap a gift.)

Wad up newspaper or scrap paper and stuff into the bottoms of the two small brown paper bags.

Put one piece of the white tissue paper into each of the small bags. Leave part of the tissue paper peeking out of the top.

Twist the tops of the small paper bags to create the turkey's legs. Fold the white tissue paper over the top and tie with twine to create the bone.

Glue the turkey legs to the sides of the large bag (the turkey's body).

Write down what you are thankful for on pieces of colored construction paper, wad up the papers, and stuff the turkey!

• 2 small brown paper bags • pieces of scrap paper or newspaper • 2 pieces of white tissue paper • twine • stapler • hot glue gun and glue sticks • brown, green, yellow, and orange construction paper (to make a “yummy stuffing”) • pen by Kara Noel Lawson

Kara Noel is a chicken-loving, tea-drinking, fiction-reading seeker of grace who is savoring small moments everyday. Kara homeschools her four children and writes from the heart on her blog, Small Things Are Big Things. You can find her speaking at moms groups about how the small things in our lives can make a big impact. Blog smallthingsarebigthings.com Instagram @KaraNoelLawson Twitter @KaraNoelLawson 13

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game time

A Bowl of Grateful WHAT YOU’LL NEED

After the first person states what he is thankful for, he will write it down next to the letter on his piece of paper. Younger children may need some help writing. This will complete the first round. You will continue playing the same way until someone has finished every letter of the word “grateful.” The first person to complete the word wins!

• 1 dice • paper, 2 sheets per person • markers, 1 per person • permanent marker • small bowls, 1 per person

TIPS & TRICKS

• scissors

This game may go by quickly, slowly, or just right! If your game ends early, play another round! Encourage kids to get creative with their answers, like foods they are thankful for, or special supplies they get to use at school. If your game seems to go by slowly or if your family is pretty big, consider playing as teams. Split the crew in half (or close to half if you have an odd number), with one side battling the other. This is a time for fun, so don’t be afraid to think outside the box!

BEFORE YOU START Write the word “grateful” vertically down the lefthand side of a sheet of paper, leaving room for the player’s name at the top. Repeat until each player has his own paper. Next, on each remaining sheet of paper, write the word “grateful” with space between each of the letters, allowing room to cut them out. Then cut out each individual letter, fold in half, and place in each person’s bowl. Each bowl should have all of the letters needed to create the word “grateful.” Set out one bowl filled with letters, one sheet that says the word “grateful,” and one marker for each player. Place the dice in the center.

REMEMBER! As followers of Christ we have a responsibility to live lives filled with gratitude. Sometimes it may not feel like we have much to be thankful for, or we might just forget the ways God has provided for us. But we are called to be grateful in all circumstances. Remind your children that no matter who we are or what we have, there are many things to be thankful for—the most important being that God loves us no matter what. Encourage your kids to set an example for others while they are at school or playing with friends or family. We get to show the people around us what Christ is like and that is one of best responsibilities we can have!

TIME TO PLAY! Invite your family to join you around the game. Explain that everyone will have the opportunity to share some things they are grateful for, but, it’s a race to see who can finish first! Starting with the youngest, the first player will pick up the dice and roll it, then pass it to the next person who will take a turn rolling. After each player has rolled the dice, the person with the highest number gets to pick a letter out of his bowl. That person must think of something he is grateful for that begins with that letter. For example, if he selects the letter “u,” he could say “I’m thankful for umbrellas that keep me dry when it rains.” Or, if he picks the letter “g,” he could say, “I am thankful for Grandma.” Some letters are harder than others, so it’s okay if your children have some of the same answers.

by Heather DePartee Heather has been in children’s ministry for seven years and is currently working at The Well Community Church in Fresno, CA, as the Kids Ministry Director for one of their three campuses. She has gone back to school for a degree in early childhood development and is loving every second! She is married to Adam and is crazy about pretty house plants.

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Carpe Season traditions

to the food and gifts, but in a matter of months they will not remember most of the gifts they received or the meals they ate. What will they remember?

You are probably wondering what in the world "Carpe Season" means! I admit, I am a little weak in Latin, but I would guess most of us have heard of the Latin phrase, carpe diem, which means seize the day. Therefore, my encouragement to each of you this Thanksgiving is to seize the season, or “Carpe Season"!

My hope is that they remember the atmosphere MY HOPE IS of our home during this THAT THEY season. While we enjoy a huge REMEMBER THE Thanksgiving spread of food, ATMOSPHERE I want them to remember the OF OUR HOME time we took to talk and pray, DURING THIS to reflect on God’s faithfulness, SEASON. and express our gratitude to our heavenly Father. The fun and laughter of decorating the tree, listening to Christmas music, playing games until late into the night, eating popcorn, sipping hot chocolate, and watching It’s a Wonderful Life are special memories and traditions. But, above all, I pray our kids will remember the manger scene displayed on the piano, the Christmas Eve service at church, Mom and Dad taking time off to invest in their lives, and special family times of giving thanks to God for all He has done and for the gift of Jesus as we celebrate His provisions and His birth.

As we turn the calendar pages to November, it’s easy to note that the holiday season is upon us. Even as I write this, I see Christmas trees and decorations already on display. Christmas music is playing in the stores and on the radio. The season begins earlier every year and, while some may tire of its length or of how secular it has become, Christmas and Thanksgiving remain my two most favorite days of the year. What could be better than giving and receiving gifts and enjoying our favorite foods with family and friends? Ah, Thanksgiving! I love turkey, my wife Pam’s special stuffing recipe, mashed potatoes, homemade noodles with gravy, green-bean casserole, scalloped corn, cranberry sauce, fresh-baked rolls, sparkling cranberry or apple juice, and, of course, pumpkin pie with whipped cream. I can hardly wait. Then soon thereafter, the Christmas season arrives and we join together as a family to decorate the tree. And, finally, we celebrate the culmination of the holiday season on Christmas Day with cinnamon rolls, followed by opening the Christmas stockings and the presents from around the tree. I love watching the faces of our kids and grandkids as they open their presents. Truly, these two holidays are always significant days of celebration and precious time together as a family.

I encourage you to take some time this November and December to embrace family traditions, express your thanksgiving to God, and make faith-filled memories that your kids will someday take with them to their own families. Carpe Season! by Brian Newberg

There is something unique about the Thanksgiving and Christmas season that is different than any other time of the year. Unlike any other holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas provide some of our best opportunities for making family memories, creating family traditions, and just enjoying time and conversations together. I know our kids look forward

Brian Newberg has served on staff at New Life Church as the Executive Pastor of Business Administration for over 20 years. He and his wife, Pam, are one of the founding families of High Country Home Educators, the homeschooling ministry of New Life Church. Brian is passionate about encouraging dads and moms in their role as the primary disciplers of their children. He and Pam have been married 31 years and have four adult children and three grandchildren. 17

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fa m i ly t i m e r e c i p e

Pumpkin �ump Cake THIS YUMMY NEW FALL FAVORITE IS THE PERFECT COMPLIMENT FOR A NEW FAMILY TRADITION OF GRATITUDE! Prep Time: 15 minutes

Cook Time: approx. 1 hour

WHAT YOU’LL NEED • 1 yellow cake mix (reserve 1 cup)

Yields: 15 servings WHAT YOU’LL DO 1.

Preheat oven to 350° F. Butter the bottom of a 9" x 13" pan or dish.

Combine the cake mix (less the reserved 1 cup), 1 egg, and 1/2 cup of the butter; mix well. Press mix evenly into the bottom of the prepared pan.

In a bowl, combine the pumpkin, 3 eggs, cinnamon, ginger, cloves, brown sugar, 1/2 cup of the white sugar, and milk. Mix well, then pour in an even layer on top of the cake mix.

• 1/2 teaspoon ground cloves

Put in the oven and bake for 30 minutes.

• 1 cup sugar, divided

While cake is baking, mix together the reserved 1 cup cake mix, 1/4 cup butter, 1/2 cup white sugar, and 1 cup pecans.

After 30 minutes, remove the cake and sprinkle the topping mixture evenly over the pumpkin mixture.

Bake for another 30 minutes, and test for doneness with a toothpick. Cake is done when the toothpick comes out clean!

• 3/4 cup butter, softened • 4 eggs • 1 (29-ounce) can plain pumpkin purée (not pie filling) • 2 teaspoons cinnamon • 1 teaspoon ground ginger

• 1/2 cup packed brown sugar • 2/3 cup milk • 1 cup chopped pecans * For an easy metric conversion chart, search the Internet for “metric kitchen.”

by Debbie Guinn

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k i d s i n t h e k i tc h e n

Turkey Cheese Ball THIS TURKEY CHEESE BALL WILL MAKE THE KIDS' TABLE AT THANKSGIVING ANYTHING BUT BORING! IT WILL BE GOBBLED UP BEFORE YOU KNOW IT!

Prep Time: 30 minutes

WHAT YOU’LL DO

Yields: approx. 20 servings

Cream the cream cheese until smooth and add in the shredded cheddar cheese until mixed thoroughly.

WHAT YOU’LL NEED

• 1 (8 ounce) package softened cream cheese

Place this mixture onto a large piece of plastic wrap and form it into a ball.

Place cheese ball in the refrigerator for a few hours until firm.

• 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

Take cheese ball out of the fridge and roll it in the chopped almonds, being careful to keep the round shape.

• 2 candy eyes (found in the cake decorating aisle)

Allow your children to press pretzel sticks into the cheese ball along one side to make a full turkey tail.

• 1 Slim Jim meat stick

In the microwave, melt a small amount of chocolate chips to “glue” the round chocolate candy to the top of the Slim Jim.

“Glue” the eyes and candy corn beak to the round chocolate candy. (Consider placing in the freezer to speed up the “gluing” process.)

Insert the Slim Jim into the cheese ball.

Store in the refrigerator until you are ready to serve.

• ½ 1/2 cup chopped almonds

• pretzel sticks • 1 round chocolate candy (such as a Whopper) • 1 candy corn • 1–2 teaspoons chocolate chips (or chocolate melts) • crackers * For an easy metric conversion chart, search the Internet

10. Encircle the Turkey Cheese Ball with your children’s favorite crackers and serve.

for “metric kitchen.”

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p r ay e r

C.H.A.T. with God

neighbor, and how their faith and belief might impact the faith of others whom God has entrusted to them.

For almost 10 years now, our family has sung a song as our pre-meal prayer. When you have four kids, it seems there is always a preschooler with a new “Thank you, God” song he is clamoring to sing each night, usually sung to the tune of “Mary Had a Little Lamb.” A month ago, as we took a deep breath and started the first note of, “Thank You, Jesus, for Our Food,” I thought about how deep those three boys’ voices had gotten and how disingenuous this nightly ritual had become.

T is for Thank. It is our responsibility to give thanks in all circumstances, and I believe it is our responsibility as a family to teach our children to be thankful people. For this step, we can simply use the words, “Thank You.” Gratitude generally comes naturally to young children, but can become less specific with older kids, so challenge them to think of things that go beyond the standard, “Thanks for this day and for the food.”

We have a responsibility to God in our relationship with Him, and part of that responsibility is to be in conversation with Him through prayer. Since this nightly prayer prior to diving into a meal is one of the main times we pray together as a family, we needed to move beyond singing words as some kind of lackluster performance and recognize it as a conversation with the Creator of the Universe who is capable of more than we ask or imagine.

The C.H.A.T. acronym has turned into a blueprint for our prayers before dinner each night, as well as for bedtime prayers with our kids. With my six-year-old, we say, “God, I’m sorry for _________________. I love You because You are _________________. Please help _________________. Thank you for _________________. Amen.” For our older boys, we just remind them of what C.H.A.T. stands for as they lead the evening prayer before a meal, and we hear sincerity and thought put forth in their relationship with God as they pray on behalf of our family. We still sing sometimes, as there is an innocence in those preschool prayers, but I notice more feeling behind them as my kids have taken time to consider this communication with God.

In the book, Prayer Coach, by James Nicodem, the author outlines an easy acronym to help us learn and remember elements to include in our prayers. He uses the letters C.H.A.T. to remind us to chat with God. C is for Confess. God wants us to confess our sins to Him and He is faithful and just and forgives those sins. Since confess is kind of a big word for children, we can use the words, “I’m Sorry.” Sometimes it is hard for our kids to come up with things they have done that they need to confess, so you may need to model this as parents. Confession as a family brings what is hidden into the light and emphasizes our responsibility for the people around us.

Help your children learn to embrace their responsibility for their relationship with God by creating some sacred space for them to consider how they might pray and respond to God in prayer. You could use four small chalkboards or white boards and write each of the words used in the C.H.A.T. acronym on them. Put them up in a space in your home where your family gathers to pray and encourage your children to write confessions, attributes, requests, and thanksgiving on them as God leads them throughout their day. Each evening as you pray before a meal, or at another time you gather to pray, use this simple C.H.A.T. formula to prompt your prayers.

H is for Honor. God desires our praise and adoration, and honoring God is simply naming His attributes back to Him. For children, we can use the words, “I Love You, God.” Use this time to teach your kids more about the attributes of God that will shape their faith in Him and help them to identify how God is with them each day. A is for Ask. Scripture urges us to pray for people and intercede on their behalf, as well as asking God for help with our own needs. While your children definitely know how to ask for things, we might express this for the younger set by saying, “Please." Rather than a laundry list asking for things, encourage your family to consider how they can intercede for a friend or

by Courtney Wilson Courtney is the Elementary Director at Christ Community Church in the suburbs of Chicago. You can usually find her chasing her four amazing kids around with coffee in one hand and a camera in the other.

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g o d ' s wo r d

The Parable of the Talents

Jesus loved to tell stories. Stories allow us to see ourselves in a narrative and then make applications to our lives as needed. Many of the stories told in Scripture, especially those Jesus told, are referred to as “parables.” A parable is a short allegorical story designed to illustrate or teach a truth, religious principle, or moral lesson. Many of Jesus’ parables focus on the concepts of responsibility. These parables teach us how our heavenly Father sees our responsibility toward the poor, those who are outcast or sick, those who have been mistreated, and those who 24

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g o d ' s wo r d have sinned but are repentant. His stories also tell us that God is concerned about how we spend our time and our money.

Ultimately, I believe that taking careful account of what God has entrusted to each of us is a necessary assessment every Christ follower needs to make. As we do, we then take the responsibility for those investments so we can be sure that we are being good stewards of the gifts, abilities, time, and resources God has entrusted to us.

God has entrusted the gospel of good news to us, and truth gleaned from Jesus’ parables play a part in how we communicate God’s love to a hurting world. It matters how I treat those who are different from me. It matters how quickly I forgive, or help, or stand up for justice. It matters how I spend the resources God has entrusted to me and how I spend the 24 hours in my day … or even the 1,440 minutes, if you break it down. Each person, each decision, and each moment matters to Him, and so they should matter to you and me.

HEAR IT Read Matthew 25:14¬–29 out loud together as a family. Explain to each child what these “talents” were in the story and what they could mean in our lives today (money, time, gifts, abilities, opportunities, etc.). Then ask these questions:

In Matthew 25, starting in verse 14, Jesus shares a story that illustrates what the kingdom of heaven is like. He told this parable to make a point about the responsibility each one of us has to be a good steward of whatever God has entrusted to us.

• Why do you think the master gave the servants different amounts of talents? • Why do you think people today are given different amounts of money, gifts, abilities, or opportunities?

The story begins with a man who is about to leave on a long journey. He calls together his servants and gives to each of them a certain number of “talents.” To one he gave five talents, to one he gave two talents, and to the third he gave one talent.

• Why do you think the master was pleased with the two who had invested well? • Why do you think the master was not pleased with the one who simply hid the talent in the ground?

In this passage, the author uses the word “talent” to describe something the master gave the servants to responsibly steward. In the original Greek language, this word “talent” refers to a measuring scale, or, in most instances, a sum of money that would weigh a “talent” much like a pound or a kilogram today. So it is assumed that each servant is given an amount of money to invest while his master is gone.

• Why do you think the one servant hid his talent in the ground? DO IT As a family, take some time to share one or two things each person believes God has entrusted to him or her. It can be a personality trait, a skill, or a special opportunity. Next, share how God might have purposefully entrusted that to him or her to bring glory to Himself and share His love and grace with others.

What is missing in the text is some instruction from the master to his servants about what he expected upon his return. Some would say it is assumed that when the head of a home entrusts something to his servants, he is looking for a return on his investment and no explanation is needed. As the story continues, we find the master returning to the first servant, who doubled his five talents into ten, and the second servant, who doubled his investment into four. Both were rewarded for being good stewards. However, the third servant was afraid (perhaps of losing the money entrusted to him in the first place), and hid his talent in the ground. Upon the master’s return, the third servant merely gives him back his original one talent. This displeases the master greatly, because even a bank would have given him a small amount in interest. Consequently, the third servant is disciplined.

Finally, pray that God would awaken each person in your family to not only see what God has entrusted to him or her, but that each person would have the strength and desire to use that “talent” for building God’s kingdom here on earth. By Michelle Anthony Michelle is the Executive Pastor of Parenting, Junior High, and Children at New Life Church, and the Family Ministries Ambassador at David C Cook. Michelle has graduate degrees in Christian education, theology, and leadership, and more than 25 years of church ministry experience as a children’s and family pastor. She lives in Colorado Springs and loves a good book and a cup of coffee. 25

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tot t i m e r h y m e ( ag e s 3 & u n d e r )

LIE DOWN

These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you SIT AT HOME and when you walk ALONG THE ROAD, when you LIE DOWN and when you GET UP. Deuteronomy 6:6–7

SIT AT HOME

ALONG THE ROAD

LIE DOWN

GET UP

This month, at the end of each day, right before you tuck your little one into bed, remind her of the importance of being grateful by singing this sweet rhyme to the tune of "This Old Man.”

1. ,

Let's give thanks, Let's give thanks For our family and our friends Praise be to God for all that He has done He gave us His only Son. by Keri Larson Keri Larson is a studio-session singer in Los Angeles, CA. She is the co-creator and co-producer of The Black & White Sessions, a YouTube channel project that launched in April 2015. She lives in Costa Mesa, CA, with her husband, Tommy, and her two children, James and Mazie. Website theblackandwhitesessions.com

Twitter @blknwhtsessions

Instagram @theblacknwhitesessions

YouTube the black and white sessions

Get the audio recording of this song at bit.ly/novembertottime Repetition is fundamental to almost any learning style, so when you’re teaching your children, use repetition! 26

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blessing

A BLESSING CAN BE A PRAYER OF COMMISSION, A BIBLE PASSAGE, OR WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. BLESSINGS CAN BE SPOKEN OVER A CHILD FOR THE PURPOSE OF DECLARING GOD’S PROTECTION, JOY, AND WISDOM OVER HIM.

wanted to encourage them to never forget that when you truly live as someone who knows Jesus’ amazing love, you will pray, be watchful for the needs of others, and be thankful in all things. As we celebrate a day of thankfulness, let’s be followers of Jesus who do that too!

I remember the day we sat our eldest daughter in her high chair for her first experience with “solid food”—aka, mush. She was so proud to be sitting with Mommy and Daddy up at the big table! My wife and I joined hands and reached out to hold her tiny fingers and said together, “Thank you, Jesus, for today, and for this food. In your name we pray. A-men.” From that day on, whether we were at our house, in a restaurant, or visiting friends or family, our daughter has always reached for the hands of those nearest to her so she can say grace. This moment was never more special than when she reached out to hold her little sister’s hand at her first visit to the big table, saying, “Becca, this is when we say thank you to Jesus.”

BLESS (Child’s name), may you know the love our heavenly Father has for you! May you understand the incredible responsibility we have to share the love of Jesus with others. May you grow in your ability to pray, and be watchful and thankful, today and always. by Alex Douglas Alex is a church re-planter and family pastor in Ontario, Canada. His church is a place of unapologetic family-based ministry where the vision is based entirely on instilling a life-long faith in the coming generations. He and his wife, Kathryn, are the proud parents of two wonderful girls, Sarah and Rebecca.

READ Parents, read Colossians 4:2 with your child: “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.”

Website www.heritagegreen.cc Twitter @tallalexd

The apostle Paul used this letter to teach and encourage the church in Colossae. He

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ta k i n g ac t i o n

4047

ARTISAN BUSINESS PARTNERS

ARTISANS DIRECTLY IMPACTED

OUR STORY Jessica Honegger launched Noonday Collection in 2010 after she met Jalia and Daniel, talented jewelry designers in Uganda who dreamed of using fashion to create dignified jobs in their community. Jessica hosted the first Noonday Trunk Show, selling Jalia and Daniel's jewelry in her home to raise funds to adopt a child from Rwanda. Women fell in love with the style and story of Noonday Collectionâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and Jessica began to dream bigger than a fundraiser. Jessica soon partnered with Travis Wilson, a friend passionate about social entrepreneurship and experienced in building businesses. Both Travis and Jessica had spent years working in Africa and Latin America. Together they dreamed of starting a business that would alleviate poverty through entrepreneurship. This dream became Noonday Collection, a business that uses fashion to create meaningful opportunities around the world. In 2011, we launched the Ambassador Opportunity, inviting women across the United States to launch Noonday businesses in their 28

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ta k i n g ac t i o n

C O N S ID E

R SHOPP IN

G N O O N DA Y CO L L E C T IO N F O R YO U R FA M ILY 'S C H R IS T M A S G IF T S T H IS Y E A R!

19731

1400

1621

FAMILY MEMBERS INDIRECTLY IMPACTED

AMBASSADORS

ADOPTIVE FAMILIES SUPPORTED

communities. Noonday Ambassadors are stylists, storytellers, and social entrepreneurs who earn an income by selling beautiful products handmade by Artisans around the world. As Ambassadors style their friends, they create a growing marketplace for artisan businesses.

When you shop our collection, host a Trunk Show, or become an Ambassador, you join us in creating a flourishing world where children are cherished, people have jobs, women are empowered, and we are connected. Join us!

We travel the world to identify artisan entrepreneurs who share our dream of creating meaningful opportunity in vulnerable communities. We design jewelry and accessories in collaboration with talented Artisans, using unique materials and traditional skills to create beautiful, unique jewelry. We develop artisan businesses through fair trade, empowering them to grow sustainably. By connecting artisan businesses to a growing market for their goods, we enable them to create more jobs for people in their communities who need them.

OUR NAME The name Noonday Collection comes from Isaiah 58:10: "If you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday." LEARN MORE Website NoondayCollection.com

Today, Jalia and Daniel are owners of a thriving business in Uganda that employs 100 Artisans in their workshop and 300 Artisans in their communityâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and they are not alone. We now partner with 30 artisan businesses in 13 countries. Together we are creating opportunity for 4,047 Artisans, impacting 19,731 family members.

Facebook Noonday Collection Instagram @NoondayCollection Twitter @NoondayStyle Pinterest Noonday Collection 29

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g lo b a l

Awakening a compassionate heart and a global mind-set in children for people beyond the boundaries of their own neighborhoods.

WHERE IN THE WORLD IS ...

Germany?

Germany is located in western Europe, bordering the North Sea between France and Poland. It has a total area of 137,847 square miles. Germany shares boundaries with Denmark and the Baltic Sea on the north, Poland and the Czech Republic to the east, Austria on the southeast, Switzerland directly to the south, France on the southwest, Luxembourg, Belgium, and the Netherlands to the west, and the North Sea to the northwest.

Baltic Sea

North Sea

Russia Belarus

Ireland United Kingdom

Netherlands

Poland

Germany Belgium

Moldova

Slovakia

Luxembourg

Austria

France Switzerland

Ukraine Czech Rep.

Hungary Romania

Italy

QUICK STATS

POPULATION

82,652,256

LANGUAGE

GERMAN

RELIGION

61% CHRISTIANITY 34% NO RELIGION 2% ISLAM

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g lo b a l NOW THAT WE KNOW THE LOCATION OF GERMANY, LET’S MEET ITS PEOPLE.

There are over 82.6 million people that call Germany their home.

If you went to church in Germany, you would most likely go to a Christian church.

To talk with your friends in Germany, you would speak German.

To greet someone by saying, “Good Day,” you would say, “Guten Tag” (pronounced: Gu-tn Ta-k).

If you lived in Germany, you would usually eat hearty meals that include ample portions of meat and bread. Potatoes are the staple food, and each region has its own favorite way of preparing them. Some Germans eat potatoes with pears, bacon, and beans. Others prepare a special stew called the Pichelsteiner, made with three kinds of meat and potatoes. Germans from the capital city of Berlin eat potatoes with bacon and spicy sausage.

DID YOU

KNOW

• Germany has more than 400 zoos—the most in the world. • There are over 1,000 kinds of sausages in Germany. • The Christmas tree (Tannenbaum) tradition came from Germany.

Germans celebrate a harvest festival of thanks called Erntedankfest during the last week of September or the first week of October. Depending on the region of Germany, the harvest of thanks festival is celebrated on different days and with different traditions. In rural areas, the harvest festival begins in a church service, with a parade and music. It has a country fair atmosphere. In larger cities, Erntedankfest begins with a more formal church service including a sermon and perhaps some choral singing. Then comes the thanksgiving procession, complete with the presenting of the traditional “harvest crown” (Erntekrone) for the harvest queen (Erntekönigin). Later in the day, there’s more music, dancing, and food. In some places, there is also an evening service followed by a lantern and torch parade (Laternenumzug) for the children—and sometimes even fireworks!

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st u d e n t i d

Interruptible (6 t h

8th grade)

Intentional spiritual conversations can happen with your child! But, they seem to happen less often in planned, scheduled times and more often in car rides, unplanned moments, and inconvenient interruptions. They happen along the way. So, let me ask you, are you interruptible? I’m sure you’ve heard the value of meeting people "where they’re at." But have you applied it to parenting? Not only are we called to bring light to dark places, we must also bring it to hands-and-knees tickle fights with toddlers, side-byside drawing competitions with kiddos, social-media scavenger hunts with tweens, and to unplanned interruptions and last-minute favors for teenagers. 32

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st u d e n t i d (6 t h

8th grade)

Jesus, of course, was perfect at all of this and we see examples throughout Scripture. He beckoned children to come to Him while others wished the children would go away (Luke 18). He stooped into the dirt to draw as He loved the unpleasant woman (John 8). He went well out of His way to meet a woman who had gone well out of her way to avoid people (John 4).

to unplanned interruptions this week. How may God be leading you to respond to your original reaction? Don’t worry, our God is gracious. Our job as parents is not to save, but to overflow. When pressure is applied, everyone overflows something. And, when OUR JOB AS we overflow something other than PARENTS Christ, we can model confession. IS NOT Your failures in parenting will TO SAVE, either be the enemy’s weapon BUT TO against you or God’s powerful OVERFLOW. tool for His glory. In the kingdom of God, failures are events, not people. Therefore, let me invite you to respond to your recent imperfect moments with confession: “Will you forgive me?” goes further than you may think.

Read John 4:1–30, 39. Most Jewish men traveling from Judea to Galilee would go around Samaria. Yet Jesus “had to go through Samaria.” Whenever Scripture says that Jesus had to do something, you take notice, because Jesus doesn’t “have to” do anything. On His way to where He was going, He met a controversial woman and embraced the interruption for a life-changing encounter. Jesus lived out His purpose on the way to wherever He was headed. If you, as a parent, are consumed with where you’re headed in your carpool of chaos, never-ending to-do lists, and scheduled plans, you will miss God-sized opportunities. Remember, Jesus lived His purpose along the way. He enacted a divine encounter in the middle of His travel plans. And, the interaction started with a simple question. Divine encounters oftentimes start with simple questions.

So, with oranges on the mind and God’s glory on the line, let’s address our insides. What have you been consumed with this week? If you’re an imperfect parent (like me) who has been consumed with yourself and your own plans, let’s run to the Living Water (John 4:14), the Source of life and grace, and follow His interruptible, overflowing example.

Questions are opportunities. Asking or answering them shows interest, listening to answers affords us deeper understanding, and follow-up questions reveal a desire for more. As you’re asked simple questions, stop whatever you’re doing and engage! The questions may seem simple at first, but if you’re available and interruptible, they’re only the beginning. Our response to questions, interruptions, and unexpected pressures forms the foundation of relational equity which allows for opportunities to reveal the heart of Christ.

Read Colossians 3:2.

Confess the thoughts and agendas that have consumed your life.

Read Ephesians 3:14–21 and receive Paul’s prayer for yourself.

Rewrite Paul's prayer in your own words, and pray it over your family.

by Megan Fate Marshman

Imagine an orange. When squeezed, what comes out? Orange juice, of course! The same principle applies with people (Luke 6:45). When others apply a little pressure, what overflows out of you?

Megan has devoted her life to loving and listening to God and overflowing His love to others. She is driven to empower others to experience spiritual formation for a lifetime faith. Currently, Megan is the Director of Women’s Ministries at Hume Lake Christian Camps and Associate Dean of Youthmin Academy. She co-wrote the book 7 Family Ministry Essentials with Dr. Michelle Anthony. Megan lives in Long Beach, CA, with her husband and son.

When we’re pressed or interrupted, what’s on the inside shows up on the outside. Think of the difficult, unplanned circumstances from the past week in your home. When you were pressed on all sides, did your children get to see Jesus?

Website www.meganfate.com Instagram @meganfate

We, unlike Jesus, are imperfect. And our lives are full of imperfect moments and uninterruptible attitudes. You’ve likely responded imperfectly

Twitter @meganfate 33

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Unplanned Unparenthood Brooke Mardell

She’s got angel’s hair—so blonde it’s almost white. With an angel’s face to match. She’s four. And precocious. And this dear family friend already carries a fierce stubbornness that is going to make her a challenging teen but an amazing woman. She’s in her question-asking stage: Why this? How that? I know some of the answers, but not all. As we sat together and watched Up, she narrated. He likes balloons, she’d say with a grin. Her giggle was infectious as the love story of Carl and Ellie unfolded. When they started painting the nursery, she turned to me with a conspiratorial smile and half-whispered, She’s going to have a baby. I then saw her head go sideways when the next scene showed Ellie sobbing in the doctor’s office: Why is she crying?

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Ah, this answer I know. She’s really sad because she isn’t going to have a baby, I answered. Why can’t she have a baby? Well, not everyone gets to. She let that answer sit. I could see that it was brand new information for her brain. But did she get happy again? Yes. Yes, she did. How? Well, she had a different adventure. Contented, Charlie snuggled in and heaved a deep sigh, as if the breath she’d been holding had depended on how I answered that question. I marveled (and chuckled inside) at how simply her child-heart had accepted that answer—because it was an answer my grown-up heart had wrestled with for years. See, I had set out to be a mom. Instead, God taught me about being His child. I had waited and watched for the day my womb would be full. Instead, He entrusted me with emptiness. Owning, living, and braving our story of unplanned unparenthood meant learning how to thank the God who gives and takes away. Even though I knew I was to “give thanks in all circumstances” (1 Thessalonians 5:18), I spent many days ready to punch the next person who reminded me. Barrenness can take so many shapes and forms, but mine was literal, and my tears were fresh on the day I came across this odd instruction in Isaiah: “Barren one … go enlarge your tents and strengthen your stakes” (Isaiah 54:2). It sounded kind of, well, cruel. And confusing—two things that I know God is not. So I simply asked Him, What does this mean? I looked at my "tents," the rooms in my heart. I looked to expand when I wanted to shrink. I made more time for friendships. I signed up to be a counselor at a camp for foster youth. I dug into Scripture and discovered loss doesn’t have the last word. I turned to my "stakes," my marriage. I looked for ways to strengthen it. To invest in it. To fight FOR my man and not with him as our hearts wrestled with an undefined future. I guess you could say I began practicing gratitude before my heart knew what it was doing. And this passage in Isaiah—this odd instruction to expand when everything in your world says to shrink—goes on to tell us that God has compassion on us the same way we have all the warm feelings for newborn babies. [Insert eye-roll about God using a newborn baby metaphor to speak to a barren woman, but I digress.] And THIS is where we find the freedom to give thanks in every circumstance—whether our tents are small or large, our stakes are strong or weak—we are His babes. YOU are His child before you are anything else … before being a wife, or a mom, or a non-mom, or a businesswoman, or a ministry leader, or any of the many labels we can carry. I love that we get to practice gratitude even before we understand it—and even on days we want to punch the next person who suggests it. That we can encourage each other to "enlarge our tents" and "strengthen our stakes" because we know that fullness and emptiness can exist at the same time, and that we don’t have to carry empty, barren spaces silently—be it an empty womb, an empty heart, or an empty place at the dinner table. You mamas amaze me. You have been entrusted with the sacredness of fullness, even when it means nights empty of sleep. Your tents are stretched and pulled on a daily basis (and I’m not just talking about breastfeeding). Your stakes are tested by the hour. And they hold. I think most of you know what a sacred role you’ve been given as MOM. I love that we get to remind each other that the sacredness is there with or without that title. Because before we are anything else, we are His beloved littles. Having all kinds of different adventures. Brooke makes her home in Southern California, where she and her husband, Jason, are living a miracle. Together they run Home4Good, a real estate team dedicated to ending the orphan crisis. Brooke is the author of Friday’s Rain, a Bible study that tackles grief and promises life from loss, and A Girl and Her Heart, a children’s book on identity, the first of the Big Truths for Little Hearts series. Brooke loves all things in or on the ocean, likes coffee dates but not coffee. While she hasn’t been everywhere, it’s on her list. She writes and explores on her blog. brookemardell.com

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Complaint Project Mike Ruman

“Dad, I’m hungry!" “Dad, I’m tired!" “Dad, my leg hurts!" “Dad, Kyle is looking at me!" “Dad, Kyle isn’t looking at me!" As a stay-at-home dad, these types of complaints are a regular occurrence. All. The. Time. Sure I can try to tune out the complaints, or I can do something proactive about them. I decided to do something proactive about them. I created the Complaint Project (complaintproject.com). The Complaint Project is a 21-Day Challenge to eliminate complaining from your life. Piece of cake, right? When you sign up for the Complaint Project you’ll get an email sent to you each day. We’ll tackle a different topic each time—one day may be thankfulness, another may be health. What we’re trying to do is get you to think holistically about life. Some days you’ll get motivational videos, just to help you make it through the day. HOW IT WORKS We start with defining what a complaint is. A complaint is a negative expression about something or someone without having a next action. A next action is something you can say or do regarding the complaint to take action. Complaint: “Dad, I’m hungry!" 36

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Not a Complaint: “Dad, I’m hungry. … I’m going to make a sandwich!" Simple, right? I then give each kid a wristband (you can use a rubber band or a bracelet) that they change from hand to hand each time they complain. This gives them a physical indicator of a complaint, and a reminder, but also makes it a little fun. “Dad … Cooper just complained!” “Coop, switch your band.” “Doh!" *repeat* WHAT DOES SCIENCE SAY? My degree says "Accounting." I’m a data geek. Data doesn’t lie. Data doesn’t manipulate. The data shows that getting rid of complaints makes you happy mentally AND physically. I’m not going to bore you with the stats here. Google it. WHAT DOES GOD SAY? What does God say about complaining? Well, quite a bit—here are just a few verses on it: Do all things without grumbling or disputing. (Philippians 2:14 ESV) Do not grumble against one another, brothers, so that you may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing at the door. (James 5:9 ESV) Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. (Ephesians 4:29 ESV) Not complaining is not only good for your mental and physical health, but God also says, "Don’t do it." LESSONS LEARNED FROM THE COMPLAINT PROJECT We’ve been using the Complaint Project at home for the last six months. We’ve learned some valuable lessons by doing it—here are a few of them: 1.

Gratitude. Eliminating complaining (or at least slowing it down) has made our kids (and my wife and me) pause and reflect. It gives us a chance to think about why we are complaining. It also gives us an opportunity to be thankful for what we have and think about those who don’t have what we have. We talk a lot about teachable moments. Think of each complaint as a teachable moment. What is at the heart of the complaint? What good can come from this complaint? Get your kids (and yourself) thinking about next actions.

Habits Take Time. Habits take time to adopt. The Complaint Project is a 21-day challenge. Our family has been on the project so long that it’s become a habit. Yes, our kids still complain, but the Complaint Project has given us a framework, a tool, to use to combat the complaints. Each quarter, I will go through the 21-day challenge as a refresher. It’s like a workout for my mind.

Practice What You Preach. Our kids catch my wife and me complaining: “Move your band, Dad!” We have four tiny accountability partners built into our home life. They are Cooper, Kyle, Katie, and Sydney. We do a good job of pointing out complaints and asking for a next action. “What should you do about it?” is the common response. I’ll even overhear the kids saying that to each other: “Katie … what should you do about that complaint?"

TAKE THE COMPLAINT PROJECT CHALLENGE I’m going to challenge you to take the Complaint Project challenge. And I’m going to challenge you to get your family and friends involved. The more accountability partners you can surround yourself with, the better chance of success. Take the Complaint Project challenge. It’s free. It’s easy. It could change your life. I know it did mine. Sign up at complaintproject.com. Mike is the Founder and CEO of Parenting Academy (www.parentingacademy.com). Parenting Academy is a digital learning community equipping moms and dads to be rockstar parents. Mike also founded the Swipe It app (www.swipeitapp.com) that helps connect families together through fun table-topic questions and challenges. 37

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Fighting for Thankfulness

The Lusko Family

Photo Credit: Abby Carlson

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to u g h to p i c s

this kind of living and says that we have to change the way we see life to see God’s goodness in it all.

As we grow older and perhaps a little wiser, we not only find out that a thankful heart is a happy heart, but we realize that a thankful heart is something we have to fight for. As we begin raising children or even as we seek to encourage the children in our spheres of influence, we see the value of teaching this responsibility early on.

Thirdly, we have to change the way we view our pain. My husband calls it seeing our lives through the lens of faith, not only looking at life with the naked eye. We must not only see things for what they are, but we must learn to see what they could be. As we ask God to help us see how He sees, He will help us view our pain as an opportunity, not an obstacle.

A grateful spirit doesn’t come naturally for children, but it is also something that doesn’t come naturally for adults. If we let ourselves go unchecked, a selfish and entitled spirit is what flows out. Jeremiah 17 tells us our hearts are deceitful, but Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” We not only guard our hearts, but we work hard to cultivate a thankful spirit.

As we fight for thankful living in our AS WE FIGHT own hearts, we will FOR THANKFUL simultaneously teach LIVING IN OUR our little ones to live OWN HEARTS, the same way. We will WE WILL set them up to see not SIMULTANEOUSLY just the here and now, TEACH OUR but the possibilities LITTLE ONES of what could be, TO LIVE THE and to have a heart SAME WAY. filled with gratitude in every situation. You just might overhear a child saying to another, “Thank you for helping me, sister! I couldn’t have done it without you!” Or you might melt when you hear your child pray, “Thank You, God, for heaven, and thank You, God, for loving me.”

Robert Louis Stevenson once said, “The person who has forgotten to be thankful has fallen asleep in life.” The natural pull of our hearts is to be sleepy in thankfulness, but we have to fight against it, and the best way to teach our children this is to model it for them. We need to always be fine-tuning the art of thankfulness in our own souls. In our home we say, “thank you,” often. We say thank you to God, and we say thank you to each other. We want to teach our girls how to be thankful in hard seasons as well as easy ones. Paul says in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” It’s God’s will for us to be thankful!

by Jennie Lusko Jennie is the wife of Pastor Levi Lusko of Fresh Life Church in Montana. They have four beautiful daughters—Alivia, Daisy, Clover, and Lenya, who is in heaven. One of the greatest joys and callings on their lives is to share the hope found in Jesus—that those stranded in sin would find life and liberty in Christ. In addition to Fresh Life, Jennie and Levi founded the o2 Experience in 2004 and Skull Church in 2009. Jennie loves telling her husband how amazing he is, teaching her daughters, leading their staff ladies and staff wives, getting in a spin class whenever she can, and snacking on peanut butter M&Ms every now and then.

I love that we aren’t asked to be thankful for all situations, but God’s will is for us to be thankful in them. Why? First and foremost, God is good. We can be thankful no matter what is happening in the moment, because He is good, He loves us, and He is in control. One of the best things we can instill in our children is the worldview that God is good even when our circumstances aren’t. Secondly, there is always something we can be thankful for within the trial. Yes, your child’s teacher treated him unfairly, but he can be thankful for parents who love and understand him. Pastor Kevin Gerald explains

Website mrslusko.com Instagram @jennielusko Twitter @jennielusko

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60-Second Blessing

'Tis the season to be busy … ugh! With our over-committed schedules of parties, school events, shopping, and hosting family, it seems the busier we get, the shorter our words can be to each other. Holidays tend to bring out the worst in us—when they should bring out the best. In the midst of all the distractions of the holidays, we want to give you a simple practice to create a stronger connection in your marriage—a life-giving practice that requires only two minutes of your time! 40

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m a r r i ag e We often underestimate the power of words, but it’s amazing what a simple compliment can do to lighten the mood and grow love. On the other hand, it’s even more astonishing how a critical or sharp word can put a chill in the air and put distance between the two of you. One of the turning points in our relationship was when we learned to leverage the power of speaking words of encouragement over each other. This simple practice was so dramatic in turning our marriage around that we still do it everyday. We call it the 60-Second Blessing, and here’s how it works: You begin by speaking 60 seconds of encouragement to your spouse. Let her know the things you love and appreciate about her. Once you’re finished, your spouse spends the next 60 seconds sharing what she loves about you. It’s that simple! WHY THE 60-SECOND BLESSING IS EXTREMELY POWERFUL INSIDE A MARRIAGE: 1.

It assumes the positive in each other. When you start off the day with expressing your love for each other, you're setting a tone. More grace is often given on those days, as it’s hard to be mad when your spouse just shared how much she loves you. The discipline of reminding yourself what is so attractive about your spouse helps you focus on that, rather than the proverbial "dirty socks left on the floor."

It’s carving out time daily. The average couple spends less than four minutes a day connecting. We can do better than this, right? Be intentional about being present with each other. Don’t allow busyness to become the destroyer of your intimacy.

It’s habit forming. Wouldn't you love to hear why your spouse loves you everyday? Couples that have adopted this healthy habit have seen significant attitude shifts in their relationship. This carries some relationship momentum and begins to be the go-to habit before you start the day, before date nights, and even before you head to the bedroom.

Ready to take it to the next level? Watch how this practice begins to transform your house. Imagine what message it will send to your kids as they watch you both affirm each other and share why you are grateful for each other. Imagine what this one practice could do in the hearts and minds of your kids as you turn to them and affirm all the amazing qualities that you love about them, too. One last thought on this: If marriage is a mirror of God’s love for us, what would it look like for you to act on behalf of the Father toward your spouse? Look at the image proclaimed in Zephaniah 3:17: The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing. Imagine! The Father sings His affirmations over you every single day. What would it look like in your marriage to take away the words of rebuke and replace them with words of rejoicing? Bonus points: Write down at least 10 specific things you love about your spouse on a piece of paper and hand it to him or her on a discouraging day. For a great example on how to give your spouse a blessing go to bit.ly/60secondblessing and watch The 60 Second Blessing HAPPILY EVER AFTER. by Casey and Meygan Caston Casey and Meygan launched Marriage365 as a way to help educate couples on how to do marriage well by giving them practical tools through a variety of online resources. They have been married for 13 years and live in Southern California with their two children. They LOVE going to the beach. Website marriage365.org Instagram @Marriage365 41

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Fred Fate's family 42

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s p i r i t ua l g r a n d pa r e n t i n g

Expressions of Gra�i�ude grandson’s birthday before heading off to preschool. On both occasions, early in the morning, we placed the speaker in the front yard of our grandchild’s home. When the unsuspecting grandchild came out of the front door, music, song, and dance suddenly burst forth, followed by hugs and laughter. Neighbors came out with their own children and joined in on the celebration. Although the celebrations were momentary, the results were evident. These actions developed into later dinner conversations that led inevitably to prayers and expressions of gratitude to God for the way in which our grandchildren were experiencing love.

At some point in our lives, we all come to the realization that we have become the matriarchs or patriarchs of our families. By then, many of us may have already become grandparents of our children’s children. As Christ followers we have been given the responsibility of taking ownership for expressing gratitude to God on a continuing, moment-to-moment basis for the many gifts that He has given to our families and our friends. How can we daily express our deep gratitude to our Lord and Savior? How can we make the most of each day? One simple way is by coming together to pray before meals. However, I’ve come to believe there are countless ways of expressing our gratitude throughout the day.

I reflect often on the story of a high school student who expressed his gratitude to God for his life. Battling cancer for years and nearing the end of his life, people were awed by his never-ending gratefulness in AS A serving God through his own ministry. When asked why he GRANDPARENT, was so fervent in pursuing his MAY EACH DAY BE FILLED WITH calling, even in his weakness, CELEBRATIONS he replied, “As long as I have OF ALL KINDS— breath, I have a job to do.” HOWEVER We are all unique, with SMALL, AND different stories, skills, EXPRESSIONS histories, interests, and family OF GRATITUDE— dynamics. We also have HOWEVER different ways of expressing GRAND. our gratitude to our Creator. As a grandparent, may each day be filled with celebrations of all kinds—however small, and expressions of gratitude—however grand.

When waking up each morning, may we rise up, express our gratitude to God, and follow with such questions as: “How can I best serve you?” “Where do you want me to be today?” “What can I do to make a difference in the lives of others, including my children and grandchildren?” “How can I express more fully to you my gratitude for all that you have done in my life?” As a grandparent, and as someone who recognizes that God has entrusted me with the things and people He created around me, I know my responsibility is to live a life of gratitude. It is written in Thessalonians 5:18, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” I love thinking of creative ways to express my gratitude to God for all He has provided. For instance, several weeks ago, I purchased a portable speaker system that connects wirelessly to my smart phone. Since the purchase, we have used it to enhance the enthusiasm of specific mornings for both of our grandchildren. First, we used it to celebrate our grandson’s first day of elementary school. A few weeks later we celebrated another

by Fred Fate After a lifetime of teaching, Fred retired this past June from Los Angeles City College. As members of Grace Brethren Church, Long Beach, Fred and his wife, Ginny, look forward to spending more time with loving family and dear friends, and further serving God in ways that He already has planned. Discovery awaits. Always.

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12 Days of Advent lo o k i n g a h e a d

Choose 12 times to read together leading up to Christmas

As the Christmas schedule fills with parties and shopping, we long for time to reflect on its true meaning—the love and gift of Jesus, our Savior! Here is a fun activity to help you focus on Christ this Christmas season. Over the course of 12 days, you and your children will explore the events leading up to Jesus' birth by creating a storybook. You will need to plan time to read and create three times each week in December. I truly believe you have to fight for this time, otherwise the days, weeks, and month will just fly by.

Read the passage with your kids and discuss the events described.

Allow your children to illustrate, paint, and create alongside each passage. Be creative! Simple ideas for illustrations: Day 1: earth, darkness, or the word, “Promise” Day 2: angel, bright light

Have fun and let the kids be as creative as they'd like! Below are some simple ideas for illustrations, but kids can illustrate whatever they think goes along with the story. And, if you post to social media, we’d love to see your artwork! Use the hashtag #homefrontmag.

Day 3: outer space, Mary Day 4: old stable, “Emmanuel” Day 5: bright star, spotlight, baby Day 6: music notes Day 7: shepherds running

WHAT YOU’LL NEED

Day 8: three gifts: frankincense, gold, myrrh

• blank journal or notebook

Day 9: men with camels

• The Birth of Jesus passages, downloaded from bit.ly/homefrontbirthofjesus

Day 10: book, star Day 11: three men looking at Jesus, little town, crown

• glue • scissors

Day 12: present, big star

• art supplies (watercolors, markers, crayons, colored pencils, etc.)

WHAT YOU’LL DO

Before you begin 1.

Purchase a blank journal or notebook of any size, preferably one with thicker paper (1 per child).

Write the child’s name and age inside the front cover of his journal.

Download and cut out The Birth of Jesus passages.

Save these journals and do this activity each year at Christmastime. It will be fun to watch as your children's art skills develop and the story begins to deepen in their hearts.

by Carrie Rowe Carrie has been serving in children’s ministry for more than 16 years. She is currently the Kids Ministry Director at Fresh Life Church in Kalispell, MT. Born and raised in Southern California, she is learning to enjoy the outdoorsy life in Montana and loves all things crafty and creative. Blog cuetheconfetti.com

Glue the passages into the journal, one per page.

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ENVIRONMENTS The order of the 10 Environments listed coincides with the monthly distribution of this resource.

“God has entrusted me with the things and people He created around me.”

“Asks the question, ‘What needs to be done?’”

Serving This posture of the heart asks the question, “What needs to be done?” It allows the Holy Spirit to cultivate a sensitivity to others and focuses on a cause bigger than one individual life. It helps fulfill the mandate that as Christ-followers we are to view our lives as living sacrifices that we generously give away!

Responsibility This environment captures the ability to take ownership for one’s life, gifts, and resources before God. A child must be challenged to take responsibility for his or her brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as for those who are spiritually lost. Our hope is that the Holy Spirit will use this environment to allow each child to understand that God has entrusted His world to us.

“God fills me with His love so I can give it away.”

“God has a big story, and I can be a part of it!”

“God transforms me when I step out in faith.”

Out of the Comfort Zone As children and students are challenged to step out of their comfort zone from an early age, they learn to experience a dependence on the Holy Spirit to equip and strengthen them beyond their natural abilities and desires. We believe this environment will cultivate a generation that, instead of seeking comfort, seeks a radical life of faith in Christ.

Love&Respect Without love, our faith becomes futile. This environment recognizes that children need an environment of love and respect in order to be free to both receive and give God’s grace. Innate to this environment is the value that children are respected because they embody the image of God. We must speak to them, not at them, and we must commit to an environment where love and acceptance are never withheld due to one’s behavior.

Storytelling The power of The Big God Story impacts our lives by giving us an accurate and awe-inspiring perspective into how God has been moving throughout history. It is the story of redemption, salvation, and hope and tells how I have been grafted into it by grace. It further compels us to see how God is using every person’s life and is creating a unique story that deserves to be told for God’s glory.

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“I belong to God,

“God knows me, and I can know Him.”

and He loves me!”

Knowing Nothing could be more important than knowing and being known by God. We live in a world that denies absolute truth, and yet God’s Word offers just that. As we create an environment that upholds and displays God’s truth, we give children a foundation based on knowing God, knowing His Word, and a relationship with Him through Christ. God is holy, mighty, and awesome, and yet He has chosen to make Himself known to us!

“When I get off track, God offers me a path of healing.”

“I see Christ in others, and they can see Him in me.”

“God’s family cares for each other and worships God together.”

Course Correction This environment flows out of Hebrews 12:11–13 and is the direct opposite of punishment. Instead, biblical discipline for a child encompasses a season of pain, the building up in love, and a vision of a corrected path for the individual with the purpose of healing at its core.

Identity This environment highlights who we are in Christ. According to Ephesians 1, we have been chosen, adopted, redeemed, sealed, and given an inheritance in Christ … all of which we did nothing to earn. This conviction allows children to stand firm against the destructive counter-identities the world will offer.

Faith Community God designed us to live in community and to experience Him in ways that can only happen in proximity to one another. The faith community serves to create an environment to equip and disciple parents, to celebrate God’s faithfulness, and to bring a richness of worship through tradition and rituals, which offer children an identity. Our love for each other reflects the love we have received from God.

IT IS OUR PRAYER THAT HOMES AND CHURCHES WOULD CREATE THESE ENVIRONMENTS FOR CHILDREN TO LIVE IN SO THEIR FAITH WILL GROW IN A COMMUNITY OF CONSISTENCY, COMMON LANGUAGE, AND PRACTICE. TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HOW THESE ENVIRONMENTS CAN IGNITE A TRANSFORMING FAITH IN YOUR FAMILY, WE SUGGEST YOU READ:

Modeling Biblical content needs a practical living expression in order for it to be spiritually impacting. This environment serves as a hands-on example of what it means for children to put their faith into action. Modeling puts flesh on faith and reminds us that others are watching to see if we live what we believe.

SPIRITUAL PARENTING: An Awakening for Today’s Families

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked “ESV” are taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. Copyright © 2000, 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked "NKJV" are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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www.newlifechurch.org/thegathering

The Gathering is a unique, three-day event designed to connect you with God, empower you for the daily work of family ministry, and bring you into a like-minded community for ongoing encouragement. We feature dynamic keynote speakers, spiritually formative experiences, and compelling breakouts on family ministry, children's ministry, student ministry, leadership, marriage, parenting, and more. WHO SHOULD COME? Pastors, directors, volunteers, and parents involved in Family Ministry,

Children's Ministry, Youth/Student Ministry, Executive Leadershipâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;basically anyone impassioned about making God known to the next generation.