FALL 2019 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 1
OLOKUN IS AN ALL-INCLUSIVE PUBLICATION THAT REPRESENTS THE OFTEN UNTOLD EXPERIENCES AND PERSPECTIVES AT COASTAL CAROLINA UNIVERSITY.
The African American Association is an all-inclusive welcoming organization that promotes unity of all persons while raising awareness and sharing knowledge of the African diaspora, the exploration of how the movement of African people from their original homeland has affected the globe. This goal is achieved through social, educational and cultural initiatives such as events, programs and forums.
CO-EDITORS Kelon Barnes Selena Mendoza SENIOR EDITOR Alex Fegely COVER DESIGN Jeremy Govan WRITERS Kelon Barnes Kira Lloyd Tori Mccray Joshua Parsons O’Tia Prioleau DESIGNERS Kelon Barnes Selena Mendoza PHOTOGRAPHERS Tyrus Ceo Daniel Pinckney MODELS Kelon Barnes Kiana Cox Trieton Shannon Michaela Simpson
A note to our readers: Sometimes you’re put through a storm to come out anew. Sometimes that storm follows you in whatever situation you find yourself in. Pressure can either change you to conform or make you an outcast. The path you choose determines how you are perceived throughout the world. When that storm starts to get rough and you can’t see the other side, you must have that endurance to persevere to see the brighter day. Olokun is meant to encompass the light at the end of the tunnel, to provide a place to be heard, and to be a platform for the non-dominant voices on campus. Speaking up in a society that wants to silence you is never an easy task, so it is our hope that this publication will make it less difficult to come forth with experiences and perspectives that need to be heard. As a black man and a white-passing Latina, it is easy for us to see the lack of representation throughout society in the world and on campus. It is easy to look around the classroom or the hallways and not see many people that represent who we truly are. Sometimes, we feel as if we must hide parts of ourselves once we step onto campus in order to conform and be included in the conversation. It is easy to flip through publications and to see coverage of white faces, white stories, and other typically dominant representations of Coastal Carolina University, but there are other lenses to look through in order to fully encompass what our community is. We are more than just bodies to include in data charts and pictures. We are people with stories. We are people with dreams. We are people with resilience. We are people. May you see yourself in this publication. May you take these experiences and allow them to mold the way you see yourself and the world around you. Thank you for taking part of our journey, may you remember that you are always given a space to rise with us... This is just the beginning.
SOCIAL MEDIA COORDINATOR Kelon Barnes
ADVISOR Franklin Ellis Coastal Carolina University Conway, SC 29526
CONTENTS BROKEN BRIDGES
UNDERSTANDING THE OTHER SIDE
PRETTY BLACK GIRL DIARIES
BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT
WHO WE ARE: TRANSFORMING LIMITATIONS
COSMETIC DIVERSITY OF ACADEMIA
LET’S BE FRANK!
BY KELON BARNES
Every day, I get that uncanny (fear of the familiar) feeling whenever I get prepared for classes. Some days, I feel as if I can conquer those emotions, and other days, those emotions conquer me. It’s a constant battle I face attending a PWI. Walking into classrooms, I feel secluded. Either I’m the only African American or I’m the only African American male in there, and that’s been the same way since taking honors classes in high school as well. The constant questions are, “Shouldn’t I be used to the seclusion?” or “If you felt like this, why didn’t you attend an HBCU?” I mean, I should be used to it, but I would love to see more representation and just to feel comfortable. I did want to attend a historically black college, but I wanted to thrive in a diverse setting. Plus, Black Coastal felt like a mini HBCU—HBCCU, if you will. This is the community that I feel 100% safe in. I can be myself and not put on a facade for others. In the scholarly world, I must conform to society’s perception of an educated Black man. But within my community, I bridge the barriers between both scholarly and urban discourse. Whenever I step inside of the classroom, I must conform to “Kelon, the English major.” But when I’m amongst my homies, that’s when I turn into “KB.” Being part of two different communities, I allow myself to have that sponge-like mentality so I can take in valued knowledge. But I still yearn for brothers and sisters like me to have that relatability when I walk into those classrooms. I want to walk in a classroom where I can be myself and not feel as if I must hide certain traits of myself because it’s not the social norm. Taking my own experiences into consideration, I decided to look to some of the professors and fellow peers within my department. Tackling issues that are often overlooked within society and on our campus, the following answers came to light after I decided to discuss the questions that have circulated in my mind throughout my entire academic career.
Interviewee 1: 1) How do you feel about the lack of diversity amongst your colleagues? There is a lack of diversity in the faculty here, and this is something that is happening at institutions around the US. We have diverse student populations in higher education institutions, and we need our faculty to reflect the diversity of the students they teach. I am happy that CCU is addressing the diversity of faculty at our institution. More broadly in education everywhere: One thing that is often left out of the conversation is that we (faculty) need to be working to encourage, develop and invest in our diverse students (many of whom tend to feel marginalized within the framework of higher education) so that those that may have interest in academia as a career feel welcome in academic spaces. 2) Do you feel as if you must relate more to your diversity students in your classes? My teaching as related to diverse students - I assume you mean here the material that I teach and how the material/ my teaching style relates to minority students I work hard to develop my syllabus and the materials that I teach to reflect the diversity of voices approaches and practices from the field that I work in. This means that the materials in my classes will represent and have our class discussion reflect on race, social class, sex, gender, sexual orientation, and regionality. I always hope that students can find some piece, theory, author, methodology or other practice in the course material that they feel is relatable and that they want to engage in challenging or providing new interpretations of. From a teaching/pedagogy approach, we must always remember that we all (students and faculty) have complex identities, so we need to have a space for our voices to be comfortable and recognized in the classroom. Minority students can feel marginalized in academic settings, so it is our responsibility to make the space for our students one that is welcoming and that is inclusive. We need to encourage all of the voices in the classroom, but that classroom has to be a safe place for students. One of the first steps that I take is to try to build a classroom community where students are comfortable expressing their voices without fear of judgment from the learning community. Another important part of my pedagogy is to create learning opportunities that can appeal to students and allow them to do work in ways that are meaningful to them and allows them to bring their experiences, concerns, and interpretations to the center of their learning. 3) Have you ever noticed the discomfort of your minority students in the classroom? I have noticed that minority students can feel uncomfortable in the classroom. There is no doubt that this is a result of the ways in which higher education and education more broadly has been conducted. The voices (authors, works, teachers, and other components) that we have been historically presented in academia have been really homogenous. This can certainly be intimidating and daunting for African American, LatinX, LGBTQI+, first generation, and other minority students who may not see, read, or interact with materials that reflect their positionality.
Interviewee 2: 1) How do you feel about the lack of diversity amongst your colleagues? The lack of diversity amongst my colleagues is an issue that we are collectively attempting to address, I believe. For instance, I am on a search committee this fall that requires we take bias training in order to get to know what research has been done on bias in hiring and what we can do about it on the search committee. Also, if you look at our job ads, you will see a very strong indication that this university aims to be a diverse campus in many different ways. 2) Have you ever noticed the discomfort of your minority students in the classroom? I’ve noticed and talked to many minority students in the major who are uncomfortable in the classroom, but the source of that discomfort seems to come more from the texts that we teach and the emphasis on specific kinds of experiences and subject positions to the exclusion of others. We are working to develop courses that reflect the diversity of our student body, so things are being done in that regard. Thankfully. 3) Do you feel as if you must relate more to your diversity students in your classes? Man, that’s a hard question! I want my courses to relate to student’s lives and be meaningful, yes. I know that the content and delivery of the course is a reflection of me, as a teacher, so, in that way, I most certainly do want to relate more to minority students. I want my courses to be an accurate reflection of the field I am teaching which is, and always was, incredibly diverse.
Interviewee 3: 1) How do you feel about the lack of diversity amongst your colleagues? As our institution has grown in leaps and bounds over the last nine years (I joined Coastal in 2010), the representation of non-dominant demographics has increased in the context of the student population. In my first few years at Coastal, my classes were mostly racially homogenous, with one or two students of color among the dominantly white students. But this has changed increasingly—which is a great thing, because the classroom must reflect the racial composition and reality of the nation. However, while the student demographic has diversified systematically, the faculty demographic hasn’t. It should be noted straightaway that Coastal isn’t exceptional in the underrepresentation of non-dominant faculty, but this regard is similar to most institutions of its size and caliber. Of course, that doesn’t make the lack of faculty diversity okay or acceptable. But it is an important fact to keep in mind as you consider why mid-sized regional institutions across the country struggle to represent the nation’s diversity when it comes to their faculty. To return to Coastal: at least in the context of the department in which I am based, the representation of racially non-dominant demographics is very poor. In a department that has a significant number of faculty, I am one of two slotted faculty members of colors, the only one who is on the tenure track; the other faculty member is a lecturer and teaches first-year composition within the university’s
Core. I find this disheartening because the institution owes our students a more accurate representation of reality. If the humanities and English [department] in particular are to invite greater numbers of students to major in the disciplines, and if we are to instill critical thinking practices in our students’ lives, we absolutely need to diversify the faculty so that i) students from all backgrounds and identities find themselves represented in the persons who are experts and mentors; ii) all students, despite their own identity markers, engage with cultural difference as a reality of life. Anything short of this is, to my mind, an incomplete education in that we are not preparing the students well for the lives they are bound to live and experience within the communities they’ll inhabit once they leave the university. know my department at Coastal is trying to change its makeup in order to include more faculty who are of non-dominant demographics in the contexts of race, gender, sexuality, and ability, for example. But the process has been extremely slow and, so far, not terribly successful. The critical question to ask is: what can we change in future in order to attract and retain a more diverse faculty at Coastal? 2) Have you ever noticed the discomfort of your minority students in the classroom? Absolutely. As someone who teaches both in the Major as well as the Core, I often find that minority students feel the discomfort of being thoroughly outnumbered by students of dominant demographics. (I tend to use the term non-dominant in place of “minority.” And I typically use the term “dominant” in place of “majority” demographics. In the context of answering your questions, by “dominant” I mean white, straight, gender-normative, able-bodied, of Christian religious backgrounds, of American nationality, and whose home or first language is English. Similarly, when I use the term “non-dominant,” I mean student and faculty demographics that aren’t represented by the above-mentioned, dominant categories of identity.) This can lead to the students feeling silenced or marginalized, especially when issues of identity (as experience, as practice, and as performance) come up. For example: if the class conversation leads to a discussion of a literary character’s ability to participate in conventional sports, a student who is differently abled (physically disabled) may not feel emotionally or even physically comfortable participating in the conversation that the majority of students might “relate” to or even enjoy. Since many instructors use class participation as an indicator of students’ preparation (that is, class participation often counts toward the students’ overall course grade), the non-dominant students’ grades may be affected by their experience of being marginalized or feeling silenced. We may not often realize or articulate this, but sadly, this is a reality for many non-dominant students. Of course, the instructor can and should manage the way in which conversations should have the potential to include all students in conversation. But if students don’t literally experience and recognize the diversity of peoples’ lives and experiences, they may not be able to engage empathically with the world around them. They may end up paying lip service to issues of identity, but they won’t necessarily appreciate the significance of how different identities shape life experiences differently. If classrooms are more diverse in student and faculty representation, more students will feel comfortable articulating their positions and connecting to the coursework in a learning environment wherein multiple perspectives are given airtime. 3) Do you feel as if you must relate more to your diversity students in your classes? Yes. Because non-dominant students recognize that I am myself a non-dominant identity, if they have taken a class with me and/or chatted with me in other university contexts, they do look to me for support. Some students have outright asked me how I managed to get through school, become an expert in Renaissance literature, and get into teaching in an environment where I am the minority. In an environment where non-dominant students don’t find their cultural identities represented in/by the faculty that teach them, they might feel dissuaded from choosing a career in higher education. That is a horrible thing because we need more people of diverse identities to be educators for future generations. In some cases, non-dominant students feel so marginalized as to drop out of courses, programs, or even university education altogether—which is terrible. Knowing these risks are all too real for many students who may experience cultural alienation, I try my hardest to provide support to students who feel underrepresented in the university.
This isn’t me complaining about attending a predominately white institution. It’s more of a wakeup call for our universities to be more inclusive within the classrooms. I’m growing tired of feeling excluded out of the classroom. Not only am I uncomfortable stepping foot inside of the classroom, but I feel bored and uninterested in the curriculum because we only obtain a one-sided perspective of history. Every semester, we go further in depth into the same thing we learned previously since public school. I can’t wait for that day where everyone can feel like they belong in a scholarly setting. Maybe one day we will feel more comfortable. Maybe one day they will listen. Maybe one day.
BY JOSHUA PARSONS Dating is sort of a strange concept when you really stop and think about it. There’s all these rules and questions involved. Should I kiss him on the first date? How many dates should we go on before we sleep together? Am I talking too much? Is he even having a good time? Most of us know when a date is going well. You can just feel it. The conversation flows easily, you find yourself smiling a lot more than usual. You hope that time will slow down, but it just goes so damn fast. Since moving to the south, I’ve been on quite a few dates. No, I didn’t sleep with many of them when the date was over, and no, I didn’t really feel that connection very many times. When it comes to my dating history in South Carolina, there’s only one man that sticks out in my mind. It’s probably because I dated him the longest, had the most feelings for him, the sex was incredible, and we faced more challenges than any relationship I’ve ever been in before. I am a white, gay male from a small town just outside of Akron, Ohio. My ex-boyfriend is a black, gay male from Columbia, South Carolina. We are opposites in every way. He’s very tall, muscular, and extremely masculine. I’m short, skinny, and fairly masculine but also feminine. He doesn’t talk about his feelings, he’s very quiet, and he tends to keep to himself. I wear my heart on my sleeve—I’m loud and the definition of a social butterfly. Whoever said opposites attract were talking about him and me. In the beginning, it was so easy. We were so infatuated with each other that the relationship seemed perfect. Like clockwork, I would leave my job on Friday night and go straight to his place. I’d stay there the entire weekend then go back to my place on Sunday or Monday nights. It was so easy for us to be affectionate with each other behind closed doors. No one could reach us in his room. It was just him and me. I didn’t notice the hardships until we started to venture out. People would stare at us when we sat down at a restaurant together. I would ask him if he saw the people looking at us, and he would say all he saw was me. Who cared if people looked at us? Although that was very sweet, the stares of strangers still bothered me. There were times when we would be out together, and people who knew my ex would come up to him. He would talk to them for a few minutes then they would give me a questioning look and walk away. I would ask him why he didn’t introduce me, and he would say that they were nobody important. If it was someone worth introducing me to, he would have done it. After about the third time, it occurred to me that no one seemed important enough to introduce me to. It really started to hurt my feelings. One time, we were out bowling together, and some girl came up to my ex and hugged him. They started a conversation, and I decided that I was done with them pretending that I wasn’t standing there. I interrupted their conversation and introduced myself. I looked at the girl straight in the eye and said, “Hi, I’m his boyfriend, Josh.” She looked a little caught off guard but smiled politely and said, “It’s nice to meet you, Josh.” I looked at him to see if I upset him, but he wasn’t looking in my general direction. I knew I had done something wrong. After this happened, we got back to his house, and I asked him something that I had been afraid to ask him from the time we started dating. “Are you ashamed of me?” He dropped his head and said, “Of course not. Why would you think that?” I replied, “Well seeing as I never get introduced to your friends, I had the feeling that you were ashamed of me. Not to mention how your body tenses up when I put my hand under your arm when we are out in public. You’ve never mentioned me to your mom or anyone in your family. Just makes me feel like you aren’t proud to be with me. Are you even out?” My ex-boyfriend looked at me and said, “If people ask me about my sexuality, then I tell them. If they don’t, then I don’t bring it up. Also, there’s something you need to try and understand, Josh, being black in the south means there is already a strike against you. Being black and gay… it’s just not an easy thing to be.” Of course, this had crossed my mind. I’m not blind. I can see the south for what it is. After this discussion I had with my ex, it still bothered me when he wouldn’t introduce me to people, but I understood why. It made more sense to me why he was only affectionate in his room. I didn’t take offense when his gym buddies asked him to go out, and he didn’t
Insert Picture of Bowl with Shells
invite me. I realized that he had to live two separate lives. Things got hard, and we ended it. No love was lost, and the break-up was the most mature and peaceful break-up I’ve ever been a part of. The times that I tried to get over my ex by meeting someone new, I noticed a pattern. The guys that I talked to were all “DL.” They didn’t want to be seen out with me, and they sure as hell didn’t want me talking to my friends about them. They preferred to keep what was going on between us secret. From climbing in through my bedroom window to pretending like they have no idea who I am when they see me out, I realized that my ex wasn’t wrong when he told me that being black and gay in the south wasn’t something that very many people were comfortable being. I’ve learned my place in all of this. I can’t get too emotionally attached, I shouldn’t immediately expect to meet their mothers someday, and I must understand that it is not something personally against me. It’s just the way things go down here. It doesn’t make it right, but unfortunately, it continues to be an issue. Black men, especially in the South, struggle with being openly gay. It’s not something that can be held against them, but something does need to be done about this. The mentality of not allowing these men to be themselves is extremely harmful to black lives. My hope is that this can change. I’m sure being black and gay in the south is a lot harder than being white and gay in the south. I also bet that being a black man dating a white man adds even more complications. I hope that someone reading this knows that although society might not agree with it, you owe it to yourself to be yourself—in your own time, in your own safety, and whenever you feel enough comfort to do so.
BY KIRA LLOYD “You’re so pretty for a black girl.” Can you imagine having someone say that to you? I’m “pretty for a black girl” is probably more of an insult than it is a compliment. I mean, have you ever heard anyone ever say, “You’re pretty for a white girl?” No, because white women aren’t normally ugly. They’re placed in a higher position than African American women are... Which is pretty sad, but honeyyyy we can change that. The melanin that I and all my sister’s reading this have is beautiful regardless of anyone’s definition of “beautiful.” We live in a society where braided hairstyles and our natural curls are frowned upon, and we’re forced to conform to what others feel like we should do with the crown on our head. But sister girl, you rock those knotless braids, bantu knots, or whatever you want. Baby, you’re pretty AND a black girl. The body that you were born with... Don’t ever feel like you’re too fat or too skinny. Personally, I’m not at the most “perfect” weight. I’m constantly being told, “Oh you’re so little” or being asked, “Do you eat?” I’ve been skinny my entire life. I look at myself in the mirror and try to pull my jeans tighter against myself and wonder what it would be like if I was a little thicker. These comments have molded me into this insecure being, trying to slowly build herself into this confident, blossoming flower. I tell myself day in and day out that I AM pretty AND a black girl. I mean, maybe I’ve always been, and I’ve just let the words of others cloud my judgement. I understand that beauty is subjective. We learn that humans are more attracted to others who resemble themselves, but I’m always concerned that whenever a black person, more specifically a young black girl, is asked to imagine the most beautiful person in the world, it isn’t a black woman. It should start from the home of finding the beauty within our melanated skins. I remember as a little girl, I had this same problem. There wasn’t enough representation for young black girls like myself who were already insecure in elementary school. This made it less possible to decide that my favorite celebrity would be a black person. My favorite celebrity was some blonde-haired kid from whatever Disney Channel show I was watching. It wasn’t until I got older and was able to decide what I wanted to watch on my own that I started seeing women that “looked like me”--Rihanna, Beyoncé, Kelly Rowland, Sanaa Lathan, Regina Hall, Regina King, Maya Rudolph. These were women who inspired me and made me realize that not only were there black women who were successful in their respective fields but they were beautiful in their own ways as well. Beyoncé was tall, Rihanna was rocking her fivehead (we all know that woman got a noggin on her and so do I), Kelly Rowland and her chocolate skin, Sanaa Lathan and her short hair styles, Maya Rudolph being a black woman killing it on a mostly white show, etc. Even these women faced opposition from society, and of course, this is when I realized that my insecurity stems from how society has treated black women in general. In an interview with Vogue, Beyoncé stated: “My mother taught me the importance not just of being seen but of seeing myself. As the mother of two girls, it’s important to me that they see themselves too…. they don’t have to be a certain type of fit into a specific category.” It is important that we start at an early age to make sure that the young black girls in our lives are comfortable with the color of their skin and that they’re confident with knowing their skin is absolutely beautiful. Should conversations shift from inclusion to teaching how to feel prideful? They definitely should. Young black girls should definitely be considering themselves and women like them as the most beautiful inhabitants of this world. It doesn’t make sense to teach each other that we should be celebrated in all aspects if we aren’t first celebrating ourselves. The saying “love yourself first or nobody will” comes into play in this instance. Self-love is the best love. We’re all beautiful in our own right, and the saying “ you’re so pretty for a black girl” has no place in any of our lives. Skin color doesn’t make us ugly. There shouldn’t be competitions between lighter and darker skinned people. Your skin is stunning. Your face is pretty. The only thing that is ugly is the way of thinking coming from those that are putting us down due to something we can’t control. However, we can embrace our skin colors and be proud of our melanated hue that shines in the sun on the hottest days and glistens in the winter. We’re pretty, and we’re black girls.
Supporting our fellow students here on campus is extremely important to us, so we decided to sit down with Zakkiyah Muhammad, a current Accounting Major and fourth-year student from Chicago, Illinois running her very own business. Her business, Kiyah Kollection, features hair, lashes, and fashion accessories for women, and she advertises on her Instagram, @kiyahkollection. She shares her experience of balancing school and work with us through an interview with our editor, Kelon Barnes. •
What motivated you to begin a business while attending college?
First I started making wigs and trying hair from different companies, which inspired me to sell my own hair. The hair I sell is affordable but good quality so it’s perfect for college girls. But it doesn’t stop there, I also sell accessories now. •
How do you manage your business and school workload?
School comes first of course but when my work gets overwhelming I just take a break and think about other business opportunities. It can be stressful at times but I’m passionate about helping young women look and feel good about themselves for an affordable price so I always make time. •
What hardships do you face as an entrepreneur in college?
The toughest thing has to be when I have a test coming up or a lot of homework and I forget to promote or don’t have time to make a flyer. This pushes things back but I try not to stress myself out about it. As a senior I don’t have much free time anymore since I try to be involved more on campus which also takes away from my social life. • What advice do you have for students interested in entrepreneurship? To me, running a business is not easy. You have to be passionate about what you’re doing because it’s not just a quick way to get rich. You have to put time, energy, and money into your business. Before you launch your business, make sure you have a well thought out plan, and whatever you do, just keep going. Not everyone’s going to support you or see your dream the way YOU see it, and that’s okay! Please join us in supporting Zakkiyah and her business by visiting her website, kiyahkollection.com, as well as giving her a follow on her Instagram page!
BY O’TIA PRIOLEAU Our daily lives are subject to the color of skin we possess, and there are no shortcuts around the fact that we are people of color. As individuals, we have to market ourselves, and it can become difficult when stereotypes are only based on what color we are. I want to hear from our melanated siblings, cousins and family. I want to talk about experiences in and out of our daily lives, to talk about living our college experience and the lessons we’ve learned as well as the lessons we continue to learn in our interactions as adults. We all need to know that no matter the amount of melanin we hold, we are who we are, and we can do anything we set our mind to. No one can be a better you. Freedom of speech is what starts our U.S. Constitution, but that First Amendment right is not truly fulfilled. We are still limited by what we say and what we do because of what we look like. This is where stereotyping comes in; looking and judging before one can speak. Reading and listening are the best way to learn from others. What better stories can be told than from those around us? Dr. Mauricio Castillo, Assistant Professor of Spanish and Latin American Studies in the Languages and Intercultural Studies Department at Coastal Carolina University enjoys teaching. I had the pleasure of being a student of his while learning the Spanish language. He was the kind of teacher that did not mind having one on one time with his students and it showed. Throughout his interview we touched on many subjects, but the most surprising one to me is how he felt about his place in the Humanities field. He talked about how much he wants a better life for his daughter; the fact that he came to America without knowing the language was tough and knowing that his daughter won’t have to go through the same thing brings him joy. Every interview starts off with the same question; What was it like for you growing up? From there I fed off their answers to expand their disclosing: • What was it like for you growing up? “I’m originally from Peru. My dad was a doctor and did his residency in the United States back in the 60’s. [There are] six of us in our family, three brothers, three sisters, and I am the youngest, and while my dad and mom lived in the US, they had my older brother in Canada because he did one year of residency there then they came back to Minneapolis and had two more of my siblings. While my mom was pregnant with the fourth one, my sister Margie, they decided to come back to Peru. This is back in ‘68, and then after that, my fifth sister was born then me.” • What brought you to America? “It had to do with the fact that my country was not doing well. This was back in the 80’s where I grew up. We were really ravaged by terrorism, and the economy was really bad. I came here when I was 18 years old. Two of my siblings, who were born in the US, had US passports [so they] moved to California, and [while] I continued to go to school there in Peru, [my parents] petitioned for me. By the time I finished high school a year later, I got my visa. I wasn’t forced to come here. My dad asked me if I wanted to come here, and I was like yes because I realized at that age that things were not going to be that easy for me in Peru.” • Did you move by yourself? Were you still with your family or did you decide to go solo? “I moved first to LA; I was there two months. The day I arrived to the U.S. was the day of the LA riots, so it was really tough. My brother was in the Navy, so he was not there. After a month and a half [or so], I moved to Phoenix, Arizona, which is where my two sisters were living at the time. I stayed there for four years. I went to school there and transferred to Tucson University [after] being at Arizona University for three years. I was living with one of my sisters who had a house. I was not paying rent there, so I was living there for free. By that time, I felt like I wanted to be on my own. [That’s when] I went to Tucson in ‘96. After a year, I managed to go to grad school in New York, and I started my doctoral studies. I was sure I wanted to be a professor, a researcher.”
• What made you want to move to South Carolina? “It was a professional move, I finished my PhD in New York in 2014. Professional jobs in humanities are really hard to find now; it’s a lot of people, very competitive, very few jobs. [I had another job] it was not permanent, it was a yearly contract, and I worked there for two years. While I was there, I was applying for more stable positions, and I was offered a position here at Coastal Carolina University. That’s when I moved in 2017 because I wanted to be a professor.” • What limitations did you have to overcome? “Language limitations were the major ones for me. Some people think you’re mentally challenged or there’s something wrong with you, but they just don’t understand it. I was not able to communicate because it’s not my native language. I would say for my job as a professor, I felt like being a male was like being a minority. I had to understand what a minority meant while being in the US, I felt being [non dominant,] I had advantages and also disadvantages. In my field, being a male is not an advantage. I’m not griping or complaining, it’s the truth. I was favored when I got financial aid and scholarships for being a so-called minority. In the end, if you work hard, you can overcome anything.” • What advice can you give to those who are reading this? “You have to have resilience. You have to be stubborn and know what you want. You may not be able to fully [defeat] your challenges, but you need to figure out how to get around it in order to reach whatever goal you want to reach.” Dr. Franklin Ellis, Assistant Director of Intercultural and Student Inclusion Services is one of the most inclusive individuals on campus. He works with students to ensure they savor their experience at Coastal Carolina University. Aside from advising clubs and organizations; Ellis teaches. During our interview he spoke on his personal battles as a gay black male growing up; finding himself and finding others like himself. He overcame many things throughout his lifetime thus far and has learned from those obstacles he faced. Here we get to read what is was like for Dr. Ellis growing up into the person he is today: • What was it like for you growing up? “Growing up was hard, but I think growing up is hard for everyone. I faced issues of racism at an early age as well as heterosexism and homophobia. When I talk about homophobia, I mean in the form of people perceiving you are gay and discriminating against you for the perception only without having concrete confirmation. I was picked… a lot... I fought... a lot, I won some and lost most, but I still fought.” • In the way that you were brought up, was it easy to make connections with other individuals? “Yes, it was easy for me to make connections with others because I was raised in a military household. Due to having to move around so often, you learn to be charismatic and draw people in. You learn to perform in essence.” • What were the different environments like for you growing up? What have you learned from these places? “Germany… I was young but I still have a feeling of nostalgia from being there. Not a lot of memories, but the feelings are very vibrant. Arizona, again I was young, so there is nostalgia around it. It feels the most like home to me. Washington state was THE most accepting place that I have ever lived. Some of the closest friends I have are from there. Louisiana was horrible. I went from being totally accepted in WA to being the complete outsider in Louisiana. I was picked on constantly my ninth grade year, but that year also taught me how to fight back with my brain and my words. It was where I learned how powerful my words make me. New York, I was always the outsider looking in. No matter how close I got to people, I never felt like one of them as everyone in the high school had grown up together. Moving back to SC for school was very surreal. I was able to bloom in college. I wouldn’t say I found myself in college. College allowed to dabble in finding who I am. I found myself in Dayton, Ohio. Ohio is where I became an adult and fully aware of myself. I found my truth in Ohio. California taught me I was human, I’ll leave that there.”
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What terms have you learned to like versus dislike; for example, words such as “limitations” and “minorities” and why? “I still do not like the term queer but will use it to honor someone if that is how they identify. I do not like language that is deficient such as minorities meaning less than, or historically disenfranchised as it is not historical, it is still happening. I have shifted away from people of color as it is not an all-encompassing word that embodies the power of melanin. I prefer systemically dominant or systemically non-dominant as it refers to the systems of institutional power versus the persons which makes it easier to dismantle.” • Being part of a military family, what lessons have you gained from your experiences? “I have learned that friendships is not about proximity but about synergy. I have learned not to get too attached to places and things as you never know when you will have to leave them. Most importantly, I have learned to be like water; no matter what environment I am in, I am able to adapt while still being true to who I am.” • How do you feel in the sense of being enough? What is your coping mechanism for this concept? “In regard to being enough, I no longer carry with me imposter syndrome or dual alienation. I cope by only controlling what I can control in my life as well as being the only dictionary to define who I am.” •
Since LGBTQIA+ was not as visual as it is today, what did you do back then to make it more comfortable for yourself? “I hid it then I gave myself the title of heteroflexible then I became over-the-top gay... I mean gay in all capital letters. If I was going to be gay, I was going to be the best gay around. As years went by, I was able to find confidence in myself and the realization that gay is only part of me, not all of me in terms of my identity.” • Being a black male in the LGBTQIA+ community, what can you say has been a real obstacle you had to face? “R.A.C.I.S.M. oh and did I mention racism?” • What advice can you give to those who are reading this? “I can’t push my views on [others] like I wouldn’t want them pushing their views on me. Know your worth and know your value because [a lot of times we allow others to define] our worth and value. When you know your own worth and value, you make decisions that benefit you.” Dr. Prashant Sansgiry, Professor and Associate Dean of the College of Science and a Faculty member in the Math Department was one of the individuals that was here at Coastal Carolina University since it started. I sat with him to talk about what it was like when he arrived to CCU; he remember the trailors on Prince Lawn and the blizzard he had to escape in Wyoming to make it to the South Carolina weather. Dr. Sansgiry is happy for the moves he made thus far and would not change a thing. His life was not the easiest when you talk financially, but he had what he needed to make it to where is today: •
What was it like for you growing up?
“I grew up in Mumbai, which is a fairly big city. In my house, we spoke different languages. My father spoke mostly Konkani, my mother spoke Marathi [which] is the language of the state Marasha and Mumbai is the capital of that state. My father grew up in the state Guha which is south of Marasha.” •
Was it hard to transition to just English?
“[We studied] the traditional English language which helped me when I came down here. I was fluent in reading and writing and comprehending the language. It was easier to get into an environment where everyone was speaking English compared to Mumbai where we have several different languages.”
• When you moved to America did your family move with you? “No, I am the only one here. I came here to do education, and then I got a job here. When I moved here, my brother was in Mexico, [while] my sister was still home studying biology. My brother came to visit for a month in 1992, but that’s about it. I generally go [back] every year to visit my family.” • What were some limitations you had to face throughout your life that you overcame? “I don’t know how my father managed the finances, but somehow he just told me, ‘You go to college, I’ll take care of stuff.’ [For] my undergraduate, I didn’t have to worry about working. I just had to worry about getting good grades, but we didn’t have leftover money to have fun [and] get clothes. I think I remember I had four pants and four shirts just to go to college and to go out. Other than that, I think we were okay. My father and mother both emphasized education. Both my mom and dad had undergraduate degrees, so I think that helped. They realized how that would impact us, so they made sure we went to college.” • How did you become a part of CCU? “In math at that time, they used a national meeting. There used to be a place where you would do what they call speed dating [but instead,] you do speed interviews. At one of the tables, I talked [to someone] from Coastal Carolina College, which was part of the USC system. I interviewed there, and then I got a call to do a campus interview. I still remember leaving Wyoming going to Denver airport in a blizzard, barely made my flight. Then I came here in April, and it was 75 degrees. That’s when I said ‘I hope I get this job; this would be the place.’ I started here August 16th, 1990.” • What advice can you give to those you are reading this? “When I was young, it was much easier for me to just go out and adventure, and now I think twice before going anywhere. If opportunities like that come, then take it, especially when one is young because as you get older, they get smaller and you get a little bit hesitant. I learn a lot by listening.” -Dr. Prashant Sansgiry Learning from the people around us can give us a bigger picture of how to go about living better lives for ourselves even when it looks like there’s a roadblock ahead. Speaking and connecting allows you to stay informed and aware of what is happening and keeps you focused on getting closer to your goals. As melanated people, we have many obstacles, but we have to choose whether we want to make a tool for greater success or allow it to limit our success.
BY TORI McCRAY
Coming from a small, private Christian school, I looked forward to college. I was not like most people my age. I did not look forward to staying on campus or creating this group of friends I would apparently have for the rest of my life. I was looking forward to what I was going to learn. I started off at Coastal with a major in Intelligence and National Security Studies and a minor in Statistics. During my second and third semesters, however, I spent more time around English majors. Like many people, I had the view that majoring in English could only land me a career in teaching, and I knew that was not for me. I came to Coastal as a Degree in Three student and changing my major several times was not ideal. However, after talking with various people throughout the English Department, I made the decision to change my major to English with just enough time to complete the program in the time allotted. Like most high school students, I studied Literature and Composition for four years in my English classes. The curriculum was heavily structured, not allowing for any views that would go against those of the Christian faith. For a long time, the Harry Potter series was not allowed to be displayed in the library because it was comprised of witchcraft. This restrictive education system was the main driving point behind me wanting to major in English. Within English as a subject, students mostly read from the same or similar books for about eight years throughout their education. I have not been in a college literature class where the instructor didn’t ask, “Did you read this in high school?” Some of the students would say no, but most say yes. Literary classics such as Beowulf and The Odyssey are essentially retaught with an intended deeper analysis. Within the English major at Coastal, there are two types of courses that are considered foundational in the literature portion: American Literature and British Literature. Both courses focus on the history of the cultures and the writing that was produced throughout these regions. As an American-born English major, I understand the importance of American literature. The purpose of the course is to analyze the writing that was created during the early years of America’s history. Through this writing, we as students can better understand the culture and behaviors of our ancestors. American Literature’s purpose is to both assess and praise the authors who wrote during the crucial time in history of civilizing America. In high school and into college, I have always been annoyed over the obsession and glorification of British literature. This glorification not only exists in literature but also in history, and the two are usually paired. History classes in high school primarily focused on the finding of the United States of America and the American Revolutionary War. Even in World History classes, the curriculum was structured around the United States of America and Great Britain with small portions of French and Spanish history. Throughout the 18 weeks of study, around a week was given to the Atlantic Slave Trade and Native American history. As a high school student, I was not aware of the various oppressions that existed around me, specifically in my education. As a seventeen-year-old, I did not ask why we only celebrated black history during the month of February. It was something that I had become accustomed to. I never questioned my knowledge of the history of black people in America until I came to college. I attended a three-week study abroad trip to Ghana, Africa during my second year. The semester
before the trip, I received a rude awakening that I knew very little about my people’s history and accomplishments in America. I didn’t know much outside of what I was taught in primary school. I became angry with myself for not realizing my lack of knowledge and my parents for not educating me. This realization prompted me to look into taking electives that were tailored towards African American history or the African American Diaspora. While on my journey to better educate myself, I discovered that Coastal’s English Department offered one course during one semester of the year that focused on African American literature. Students are required to take British literature because it highlights the culture of our ancestors’ ancestors. It is fundamental to study British literature and history to understand American literature and history; however, this is also true for African American literature and history. It is not a foreign concept that the civilization of America could not have been accomplished without the forced labor of Africans. The Atlantic Slave Trade played a crucial part in the development of infrastructure and crop yielding in America. Writings produced by African Americans could be integrated into the American Literature course outline and should be. However, when the English Department created a course specifically labeled African American Literature, it placed the literature of systemically non-dominant Americans in a separate, lesser category. Further, in academia, systemically non-dominant people rely on texts to tell them of their culture’s history. We expect to be thoroughly educated on all aspects of history involving systemically dominant and non-dominant people. When curriculum is structured to give light to specific demographics, it labels texts produced by systemically non-dominant people as othered. If we study literature to better understand perspectives and beliefs that are different from our own, why are the texts of systemically non-dominant people nonexistent in academia? As a Black English major, this was very disappointing. Coming to college, I expected to be surrounded by a diverse group of intellectuals that held various views on numerous topics. While this could still be accomplished through instructors and peers, it is not through curriculum. Coastal is not a HBCU, but there is a significant number of African American students. The university does not accommodate or recognize their culture as much as they claim. All institutions promote diversity to attract specific demographics. Coastal is no different. The Office of Intercultural and Inclusion Student Services was heavily promoted during my campus tour and through my freshman year on campus. While visiting Coastal’s website, it seemed as if they went out of their way to display black bodies in their photos to showcase various programs and organizations. This effort to diversify the university should not be solely focused towards organizations and programs. It should be implemented into academic programs as well. After spending thousands of dollars to attend a university, I expected to learn from and be taught by individuals who have already walked down this path. I did not expect to have to educate myself. During the slave trade days and afterwards, African Americans were forced to teach themselves how to read and write because the right was denied to them. Now in the twenty-first century, African Americans have the opportunity to educate themselves through academia at the same rate as whites. However, we are still being forced to teach ourselves. When curriculum is structured in ways that glorify the accomplishments of one demographic and gloss over the accomplishments of others, we continue to live in a world where systemically non-dominant people are forced to educate themselves on what truly happened in history. If an institution promotes and claims diversity, it must be diverse in all things. While discovering that I would have to educate myself on certain topics, I came across the book Aphro-ism: Essays on Pop Culture, Feminism, and Black Veganism from Two Sisters. I purchased the book with the intent of learning more about veganism through the perspective of African Americans. I did not expect to be propelled into an intellectual experience about black bodies and minds as well. Although the book has a focus of veganism, it forces readers to reexamine their everyday lives of being a non-dominant person in America, regardless of whether they are vegan or not. This book pushed me to search for other books about black culture and the truth of black history. After deciding I needed to read the autobiography of Malcolm X, I came across two other books about the history of Africans before the Atlantic Slave Trade. They Came Before Columbus: The African Presence in Ancient America by Ivan Van Sertima and Before the Mayflower: A History of the Negro in America 1619-1962 by Lerone Bennett Jr. are both works that highlight the presence of Africans before the slave trade began. They are both empowering books because they remind us that there was a culture and a history of African people before Europeans colonized their land.
Though it may not be fair that we are forced to educate ourselves, there is empowerment in what we may find when we do. Without this work, the information we come across will never make it into the masses. It will never be institutionalized if we do not continue to search and demand to be represented in academia. One of the authors of Aphro-ism, Syl Ko, introduced the term “cosmetic diversity” in which she defines as “be black: think white.” Syl Ko is trying to project onto her readers that diversity is not truly diverse. Institutions include African Americans for their bodies, not their minds. This concept seems to be true of academia. If Coastal cannot direct the effort put into diversifying organizations to diversifying academia instead, they cannot move forward as a university that is truly inclusive to all people. We must be able to be black and think black, learn black, and most importantly, be included—black.
After receiving many questions from the Coastal community, we turned them over to our advisor, Dr. Franklin Ellis, to see what advice he had to offer. Dr. Franklin Ellis, Jr. is from Florence, SC and crrently works as the Assistant Director of Intercultural and Inclusion Student Services here at Coastal Carolina University. He graduated from Coastal Carolina with a degree in psychology, and he earned his master’s in mental health counseling as well as his doctorate in marriage and family therapy. Dr. Franklin is well-known on this campus, and many people look up to him as a positive influence. Keeping that in mind, we felt he would be a great person for fellow students to ask for advice! • How do you cope with heartbreak after a toxic relationship? First, congrats to you for leaving the relationship. It is okay for you to remember not to allow yourself to be caught up in self-blame, you left because you were not being treated well. Allow yourself to release the hurt that person has caused you so that you do not carry that hurt on to future relationships. Some ways to cope are to surround yourself with positive friends and family that are a healthy and constant support group. Practice self-care; do the things that make you happy and feed your spirit. Take time to learn you, stay single for a while before jumping into another relationship. Seek professional help so you can talk about your feelings. View yourself as the strong individual that you are for leaving the relationship. • I am under 21 and cannot go to bars. How else can I meet other gay people? We are in the age of technology, and there are many dating apps out there that can help find people to date. Even some of the apps not made for dating allow the opportunity to date if you slide into someone’s DMs. Just remember to be responsible and to be careful when using any dating app. Always put your safety first! If you are more traditional, join organizations like PRiDE or SAGE where you can meet up with other members of the LGBTQIA+ community. If you are not a person that likes large groups, then consider asking a friend to help you by setting you up on a blind date with one of their friends. The great thing about meeting people outside of the bar is that you can see them and hear them clearly, and you don’t leave smelling like smoke! •
Should I let homophobia stop me from traveling? Many countries seem unsafe for LGBT people, but I want to study abroad. Absolutely not!!!!! It is all about knowing your environment and being aware of your surroundings. One of the best ways to do that is to RESEARCH… Google is only a right click away. There are plenty of destinations that are LGBTQIA+ friendly, where you can be out and proud! The Center for Global Engagement offers an education abroad experience to study the history of the LGBTQIA+ community in London! Australia is another location that you can travel abroad and be your full gay self as it is a very welcoming and accepting place! Don’t let your fear hold you back—there is a world to see…get out there and see it! • How can you identify a real ally? Hard question but great question! Acknowledging or calling someone a real ally is like beauty: it is in the eye of the beholder; it is different for every person. You get to decide what you are looking for in an ally, if the person meets the criteria that you have set and whether or not you wish to bestow the honor on them. I know what I look for in a person before I bequeath the great honor upon them of being an ally for me. I need someone that I can trust. A person that checks their own privilege and is able to stand up for others not only when we occupy space but also when the identity that they ally with are not in a room. Someone who does their own work to educate themselves. Lastly, some one that loves me unconditionally. Take the time to really think about what traits are most important to you when finding that sibling in solidarity, then see who meets the criteria that you have set. •
How do you stay so positive as a gay, black male in the south? Even just in general, without any identity markers... How do you keep the negativity away? Negativity will always find a way to creep in. We are humans, and negativity is part of how we are made. Being positive for me is a choice! When it comes to all of my identity markers, I live by the mantra, “I am the only dictionary to define who I am!” I repeat it over and over, and I firmly believe in it. No one gets to tell me who I am but me. When people bring their negativity in the forms such as racism or heterosexism. I already know who I am, and I do not allow their perceptions to be my reality. I don’t let anyone block my blessing or steal my joy! Lastly, I put my focus on the things that are most important in my life like my family and my closest friends, which allows me to drown out all the negativity.
“SHEEP DON’T EAT AT WOLVES’ TABLES.” -DOMINIQUE MCCONNELL
JUST THE BEGINNING...