Afro/Latino Issue #165

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Jillian’s BLOCK! The 411YOU want This time around, I’m attacking real life issues. The issues that neighbors talk about; the issues that no one addresses. The issues that no one addresses; the issues that NEED to be addressed. It might stir up some controversy, but what’s better than the controversy you love to hate? I didn’t title my blog, “The 411 you want to know” just for any plain reason. You’re going to know what the streets are saying, you’re going to find answers to your questions, you’re going to get the latest on fashion, gossip, movies and of course what other bloggers are saying! Send your questions and thoughts to me directly at jillianalgarin@yahoo.com

An American Legion/Moise Entertainment

Collabo OLD SCHOOL FRIDAYS 35 & Over Crowd in the Legion Social Qtrs Live & In The Mixx!! Dj Leroy Moise Rdg's very own puttin down on the decks Keepin the dance hot 9-1am No Cover! Relaxed Dress Code Drink Specials, Kitchen Open Come enjoy good music and the excellent vibe


Happy Birthday to my baby Lawrence! Love Always, Gloria Afro/Latino


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Things You Should Never Post on Facebook

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315 N 3rd Street Reading Pa 19601 Fully equipped body shop. Free estimates. Fully Guaranteed on all paint work. We work with all major insurance companies to make sure your vehicle is repaired the right way. Quality comes first with our 30 plus years of experience. Custom paint, collision and frame repairs. Bus Hrs. Monday –Friday 8:00 am5:00 pm Saturday 9:00 am - 4:00 pm

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FEENEY & GURWITZ

Jacob A. Gurwitz

Criminal Trial Lawyer 535 Court Street Reading, Pa 19601 Phone:610-378-7000 Fax:610-378-1500 Www.FEENEYGURWITZ.COM Afro/Latino

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There was a knock on the door this morning. I opened it and there was a young man standing there who said: "Hello. I'm a Jehovah's Witness." I said, "Come in and sit down! Now what do you want to talk about?" He said, "Fucked if I know. I've never got this far before!" There were two old men sitting on a park bench talking. One old man asked the other, "How is your wife?" Second old man replied, "I think she may be Dead!" First old man, "What do you mean you THINK she may be dead?" Second old man, "Well... the sex is the same but the dishes are starting to pile up."

A man and his wife were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. The wife says to her husband, "We've been married so long, sweetheart, I hope you feel you can ask me anything you want. After all this time I want us to be completely open in our relationship." The husband replies, "Okay, there is one thing that has been bothering me for a long time, but I haven't had the courage to ask before...but I have noticed that all six of our children look similar to one another except one. I can't figure out how he got to look so different. Did he have a different father than the rest?" The wife stops. She is unable to look her husband in the eyes. Slowly she replies, "yes. Yes he did have a different father." Her husband was taken aback. "Oh! Okay, I must know. Please tell me. Who was that child's father?" Again she cannot look her husband in the eyes. She is very distressed, and after a long silence she slowly said, "You."

Afro/Latino

Being a modest man, when I checked into my motel, I asked the lady at the desk: "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled." "No," she said, "it's regular porn, you sick bastard."

What's the difference between stress, tension and panic? Stress is when wife is pregnant, Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, and Panic is when both are pregnant. The female dentist pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot. "No way! No needles. I hate needles" the patient said. The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects. "I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on suffocates Me!" The dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection to taking a pill. "No objection," the patient says. "'I'm fine with pills." The dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra." The patient says, "Wow! I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!" "It doesn't" said the dentist, "but it's going to give you something to hold On to when I pull your tooth."

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4 Marriage-Boosting Tips For Newlyweds You just spent a year planning the wedding of your dreams. You donned a gorgeous white dress,

straightened your bowtie, walked down the aisle, said your 'I do's', smeared wedding cake on your face, toasted with champagne, thanked family and friends for an assortment of kooky gifts, and rode off into the sunset to live happily ever after. Now what? After the whirlwind of a wedding, most couples are happy to just get back to normal life, but according to Terri Orbuch, director of the landmark Early Years of Marriage (EYM) project, there are specific behaviors a newly married couple need to adopt. Based on the research of 373 couples who were interviewed and observed over the course of 24 years, she has learned what makes marriages healthy, strong and able to be maintained over the long haul. According to Dr. Orbuch, setting the foundation for a happy and successful marriage can be achieved by adopting these four

behaviors. 3. Do sweat the small stuff. It is the small annoyances, not the large ones like illness or job loss, that erode marital happiness over time. For example, if you don't like that he leaves his socks around, don't ignore it. Instead, talk about it by telling him how it makes you feel. If you don't like that she buys household items without consulting you, let her know why it upsets you. If you don't sweat the small stuff, you're more likely to be unhappy later on. 4. Acknowledge and address gender differences. Couples who are aware of gender differences typically have an easier 2. Be interdependent with your partner. time in the relationship. For the wife, relationship talk is an aphrodiWhen both partners are interdependent socially, siac, but for men, it's a turnoff! Women remember details of arguments for 2-3 days; men move on from conflict almost instantly. Wives emotionally, and financially - that is, what one partner does, feels, or has affects the other - it's don't need compliments as much as husbands do because they regupredictive of both short- and long-term marriage larly get affirmation from people outside the home. Men, however, happiness. Having separate friends or interests is crave affirmation (compliments, small endearments) and need it most great; keeping them always separate is not. Also, from their wives. Recognizing gender differences will allow you to understand each others reactions and learn new ways to deal with situamaking aspects of your life your sole concern tions. Applying these simple behaviors as a new couple will ensure that such as money or work issues - is not healthy and you create a happy, healthy, long lasting marriage.

1. Know your partner's expectations. Knowing your partners expectations is essential to a healthy marriage, even more so than having the same expectations. Sit down with your partner and each of you write down your top two marriage expectations. Exchange lists and discuss. This exercise will let you know what's important to your spouse.

will lead to trouble down the road.

What are your happy marriage secrets? Rebecca Brody

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"She Was Only 17": Men and Underage Girls Twelve months ago, it happened again. Regrettably, the story is a familiar one. An older man, balding and wealthy, began lavishing a younger woman with cash and gifts. As sure as she was stunning, he was horny. And there he salivated, only an arm length's away from a Pez dispenser of magic blue pills.

I'd be remiss if I didn't use this opportunity to invoke the government name of Robert Sylvester Kelly. Scratch that, too easy. Allow me to thumb through the crates. Ah, yes, if it isn't Rick "she was only 17" James. It's astonishing that the same man who brought us familyoriented classics like "Super Freak" and "Give It To Me Baby" actually recorded and released a song called "17" in which he professes his longing for a girl who That said, this arrangement - exshould have preparing for her SAT exam. cuse me, "non-arrangement" - was A few lyrics: She said she'd read a magazine that said I was a freak merely a platonic friendship, acYou'll never know now, little girl, unless you take a peak cording to the man that no one She was only seventeen, seventeen believes. Justice system, meet Silvio Berlusconi, Italy's Prime Minister. The two of you And she was sexy... But she was you and fine and oh so tender will be getting to know each other over the next few Would I break down tonight and surrender months. This young girl, this sweet thing, I just can't wait The young woman in question, now a whopping 18, is Karima el-Mahroug. As you can see in the photo above, No, I mustn't do this, she's almost jailbait! she resembles a Moroccan Tracey Edmonds. One catch, Wow, Rick seemed really conflicted in this epic battle of good though: the black Tracey Edmonds wasn't being wined, angel vs. bad angel. Let's see: in 2011, President Obama dedined, and intertwined at the age of 17 by a world leader. bates whether he should raise the taxes on the rich or balance the budget on the backs of the poor (which doesn't seem like Karima, though, young and susceptible, finds herself at the much of a moral dilemma to me). Yet, here was Rick, tossed up center of a sex scandal that is shaking this southern Euro- over whether or not he should shag a minor and sing about it pean country. She's been dubbed "Ruby the Heart publicly. I guess the early 80's were, shall we say, a little more Stealer". The proper forensic translation: "Ruby the Teen- tolerant. ager". This leads me to a bigger question: What's up with men chasing underage girls? Fetishes abound; I get that. And what about this cliche reference to jailbait? I'm not one to There are men who will hand over a piece of change for wax religious, but shouldn't the term be "Hell-bait"? Again, I don't something strange. But having sex, even thinking about cast stones too often, but there are three reasons why a man having sex, with a minor a half a mile north of puberty should go to hell in my opinion. One: he misuses his Bible as a doesn't rank very high on the checklist of things men means to oppress and discriminate against people that he doesn't should do before they die. understand or that he disagrees with. Two: he's a fan of smooth jazz, which, by the way, he is welcome to listen to via earbuds on Some will say it's totally inappropriate, but let's be clear: his way to hell. Finally, three: he throws "bunga bunga" parties Fantasizing about having sex with Sarah Palin, while agwhere underage girls are reported to frolic poolside in their birthgressively whispering "who's your black democrat," is inap- day suits. propriate. But the grand failure of moral judgement that al- It never fails; facts are always juicer than fiction. "Bunga bunga" lows a man to think it's okay to carry-on with a teenager, of parties is the colorful jibberish Silvio Berlusconi uses to describe his legendary sex soirees. By the way, Berlusconi credits the curwhatever sex, is reprehensible. Many men have claimed rently embattled Libyan leader Muammar el-Qaddafi with turning ignorance; they didn't know she was underage, so their police statement goes. Granted, with all the hormonehim on to the "bunga bunga" party concept. Pure gold. You can't injected beef at the American dinner table it's becoming make this up. harder and harder to tell how old girls are nowadays. Wait - It all reminds me of the show 'To Catch a Predator'. And it apthis just in - actually, it's not difficult at all. pears Italy, albeit mortified, has done just that. For all intents and purposes, they have slammed their Prime Minister to the driveCheck her cheeks - the cheeks on her face, Prime Minis- way pavement as he tried to flee through the garage door upon realizing that he was busted. For men still out there on the prowl ter. While her frame may be deceiving in some inlike Silvio it's time to turn yourselves in and get help. stances, her face rarely is. Even with make-up, you can After all, there is something sexy and, not to mention, very legal tell if you really want to. And if a man should find himself temporarily blinded by his testosterone, check her iPod for about a grown woman who looks like grown woman - both face and figure. More importantly, grown women who think and beJustin Beiber or Trey Songz. It's the ultimate litmus test have like grown women should be all a grown for whether or not the iPod owner is a minor or simply a man wants. woman who enjoys the same music as minors. Either

way, it doesn't bode well.

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Mason Jamal writes about men, women and popular culture

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Return of the $10 ad. In full Color

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Afro/Latino Magazine as a part of the community we are obligated to inform, encourage, motivate, empower and educate our citizens on the facts and de de--myth any and all misleading, negative, untrue and fraudulent information floating in our neighborhoods that are meant to disenfranchise our people..

NO PART OF AFRO/LATINO Magazine may be reproduced without the express written permission from the Publisher. AFRO/LATINO Magazine is a Registered Trade Mark. Thank you. Earl Lucas



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