31 minute read
The dangers of being online
Little Miss Squid talks about the dangers of being online!
Hi Everyone
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I am so excited that this is now my second article, I have so much to say. I wanted to write something that I feel is important. The internet, social media and mobile phones. The internet is a great place to go - it's exciting and fun, with so much to offer. Whether it's learning something new or chatting with friends. I have learnt a lot from the net and also watched a lot of funny things on YouTube. However, like Star Wars, there is a dark side, (my daddy told me to add that in, he loves Star Wars). There are some bad people that love to scare us kids and put in things like MoMo and other scary things. My advice is to sit near an adult to watch things so they can see what is happening.
Social media sites like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat allow you to be creative online, keep in touch with your friends, share photos and videos, as well as follow your favourite celebrities. Remember though, you have to be at least 13 years old to use most of these sites, so adults please make sure you follow the rules and guidelines to keep your children safe. Some things online can leave you upset or confused and if you ever feel this way when you're online, it's important to speak up and get support, find someone to talk to about what you have seen or what someone has shared with you that has left you feeling worried or unsure. There are lots of people you can talk to _ your parents, legal guardian, carer, other family members or your favourite teacher.
Some social media sites even allow you to report anything bad; whether it is something hurtful, someone has said something to you or about you or if you have seen upsetting photos that you don't want to see. Sometimes curiosity gets the better of you and it's embarrassing to ask, but be careful when you do search because you can end up searching unwanted things, make sure your parent has turned on the safe search on your computer. My parents do, they also block some of the game sites like RoBlox. Games that allow you to be friends and talk to others online are dangerous. You don't know if the person you are talking to is who they say they are, which can lead you to a lot of trouble. Never be 'friends' online with someone you don't know in the real world. My friends play Roblox, so if you do play these games and someone upset you or leaves you feeling confused to speak to an adult you can trust. If someone you have met online asks to meet up with you, send photos of yourself or asks you for personal information let a trusted adult know.
I hear a lot of parents saying that their kids don't talk to them and kids just go to their rooms. Trust me kids love to talk but parents and guardians need to ask the right questions otherwise their kids will be talking to someone else, a stranger, without telling the adults who look after them. They have opened up their bedroom to hundreds of strangers and not monitoring what they are doing is like allowing strangers into a child's bedroom. (I heard my parents talking about this).
I know you love your phone and your games but remember you control your phone, your phone shouldn't control you. My parents say it's good to sit down as family and have a free hour where all phones are put away and you all play a game, talk, eat together and spend time as a family. This is also for the adults - even you are not allowed to be on the phone for an hour.
Now a message for parents and carers; if your child comes to you with something like this you can report it to the police using the ThinkUKnow website. It is run by CEOP, which is part of the police and whose job it is to stop strangers online trying to meet up with young people. (Mummy helped me with this section).
Be kind to yourselves and others
Love
CHILD AMBASSADOR FOR FBS
W I N C H M O R E H I L L
Looking for a school where your daughter will excel? PGHS is recognised for its all-round excellence in a small and nurturing environment
NUMBER ONE IN THE SUNDAY TIMES LEAGUE TABLE FOR SMALL INDEPENDENT SCHOOLS WORKING OPEN MORNING - Tuesday 10th March 2020 9.30am to 11am WORKING OPEN MORNING - Thursday 30th April 2020 9.30am to 11am WORKING OPEN MORNING - Friday 26th June 2020 9.30am to 11am
Palmers Green High School, 104 Hoppers Road, London N21 3LJ Tel: 020 8886 1135 www.pghs.co.uk Email:office@pghs.co.uk Please contact us to book a place on our Open Mornings. Personal tours are also available.
Education – is it important to you?
We live in a culture where possessions can be acquired, enjoyed and upgraded with ease.
However, education is not a commodity but a partnership between your child, the school and you.
“The teachers we met were outstanding, they established a confidence in me that my daughter would be both well cared for and well educated.”
A child must be in an environment that is right for them so that they are happy and therefore able to learn without distraction.
“After having a tour of PGHS we knew straight away that this school was perfect for our daughter.”
Children today live in a very fast paced, technology driven world where the time to develop a love of learning and to be creative is being eroded. “It assures me that my daughter is being pushed to recognise her full potential and is surrounded by like-minded individuals who are all seeking the same educational goals.”
By choosing PGHS you can be sure that your child will: • be immersed in a truly exceptional educational experience • be encouraged to love learning • explore the curriculum with like-minded children • have time to be creative and imaginative • challenge themselves in and out of the classroom • have wide ranging opportunities • receive the care and attention they deserve.
If you have not yet visited the school, please do come along as soon as you can. The environment you choose for your child’s education is probably the most important decision you make as a parent. “I liked the small setting, just for girls, the small class size and felt that the academic standard was strong and would help our daughters achieve their full potential.”
Don’t wait to see how it goes at another school, register your daughter at PGHS where we know how it goes!
“We looked at three schools and knew when we came into PGHS that this was the school we wanted our daughter to come to.”
Please visit our website at www.pghs. co.uk to view our forthcoming Working Open Mornings and Taster Day dates. Alternatively, if you would like to book a personal tour please call Admissions on 020 8886 1135 or email office@pghs.co.uk.
Spring reads Recommended by Pickled Pepper Books
Bunnies on the Bus by Philip Ardagh and Ben Mantle 2-7 years
Bunnies and transport... what more can we say! The bunnies have taken over the bus and they’re on a wild ride across the streets! They whizz past the bus stop, swerve around corners and zoom over crossings on a non-stop roller coaster adventure! This is a hilarious romp of a book, with a fantastic read-aloud rhyming text and spectacular illustrations.
Don’t tickle the lion! by Sam Taplin (author) and Ana Martin Larranaga (illustrator) 0-3 years
Usborne have come up trumps again with a super cute new sound series. Don’t tickle the lion! You might make it roar… little ones and grown ups alike won’t be able to resist tickling the touchy-feely patches to hear each animal make a sound. This is a great new series for babies and toddlers, and already proving to be a bestseller in the shop.
Great Women who Saved the Planet by Kate Pankhurst 4-99 years recycling waste into beautiful objects. Marvel at the intelligence of chimpanzees with Jane Goodall. Learn why it’s important to shop fair trade and cruelty-free with Anita Roddick and The Body Shop. Resist devastating deforestation and plant seeds of change with Wangari Maathai. Written with hope and encouragement, this book shows that all actions, big and small, can be powerful in the fi ght against climate breakdown.
Where the World turns Wild by Nicola Penfold 10-14 years
Animals, trees, fl owers, our city forbids them all... Juniper Greene lives in a walled city from which nature has been banished, following the outbreak of a deadly man-made disease many years earlier. Beautifully written throughout, Nicola Penfold has created a book to be read on multiple levels. It is not only an exciting read following siblings Juniper and Bear and their bid to fl ee the walled city where nature is banished, but also a passionate call to save our natural world. A must-read this year.
If I had a Sleepy Sloth... by Gaby Dawnay and Alex Barrow 2-7 years
From the creators of If I had a Dinosaur, this is the perfect tale about taking the time to slow down. Featuring Alex Barrow’s signature vibrant illustrations and Gaby Dawnay’s playful rhymes, If I Had a Sleepy Sloth is a laugh- out-loud story where a little girl imagines having a sloth for a pet, providing a welcome alternative to the fast pace of modern life.
The Independent Bookshop Book of the Month for February comes from bestselling author and illustrator Kate Pankhurst. It’s a timely book about trail-blazing women who have been making decisions that have helped protect our natural world from way before it was on a political agenda, and now you can discover their untold stories. Tackle the plastic problem with Isatou Ceesay by
World Book Day 2020 Thursday 5 March
Don’t forget to redeem your World Book Day £1 tokens at Pickled Pepper Books (or any other good bookshop). You can swap your token for a special World Book Day book or get £1 off any book priced over £2.99.
Sport4Kids is revolutionizing the way toddlers and children are introduced to sport throughout the UK.
We run Sports sessions throughout the boroughs of Enfi eld and Barnet in Rugby and Football for Children aged 18 months to 11.
We also partner with numerous nurseries and schools in the area delivering Tennis, Yoga, Gymnastics, Dance, Football and Rugby as well as our ActivKids programme.
We would love to meet you little one at one of our weekend or weekday development Centers currently running out of St Ignatius College, Southgate School, Southbury and Bush HIll Park Primary School.
We are also still looking to partner with further schools and nurseries in the area.
Why Choose us? • FA Qualifi ed Coaches • Early Years Trained Coaches • Montessori Teaching Methods • Practice at Home Booklets and Nursery/Curriculum Pathway booklets to monitor and track progression
What’s Important to us? • Our children’s health and happiness • Our children’s Confi dence • Our children’s fun and entertainment • Our children’s sporting development • Our parents experience • Recruiting , retaining and promoting World Class Sports Entertainers - Not just Coaches
Saturdays Southbury Leisure Centre 18 months to 7 years Southgate School 18 months to 7 years Bush Hill Park Primary 18 months to 9 years (Outdoor Academy)
Sundays St Ignatius 18 months to 7 years
Sport4Kids Rugby is now in partnership with Old Grammarians RFC
Daddy & Dad’s Toy Fair Top Picks
Once a year in chilly January, the nation’s leading family infl uencers, journalists and toy retailers make an annual pilgrimage to their primary-coloured mecca – the UK Toy Fair in London’s Olympia Grand exhibition centre.
It’s an absolutely huge event with exhibits from every reputable global toy brand and distributer. The toy brands demonstrate their latest, often top secret innovations, toys and collectables way ahead of their release into the UK’s toy shops and homes, and we lucky bloggers and journos are treated to an exclusive, hands-on experience with them.
This year was my inaugural Toy Fair. As a big kid myself, I revelled in the opportunity to immerse myself in the nostalgia of it all. Nostalgia? Yes, believe it or not (and this should make our 30-plus readers smile), with only a few notable exceptions, 2020 will be the year of 80s throwbacks and vintage rereleases of our favourite toys and characters. With that in mind, here’s my 2020 top picks!
Nostalgia Pound Puppies
Has a cardboard box ever been looked after like a Pound Puppys’ kennel? I doubt it! Available in two sizes, 2020 sees the re-issue of 1985’s Tonka Pound Puppies, complete with their original 80s kennel packaging. Cute or what?
Brand: Toy Fun UK Available: This spring RRP: £19.99 (Pound Puppies Classic, pictured)
My Little Pony
Talk about a fl ash from the past – I vividly remember tangling Mum’s best hairbrush in my sister’s My Little Pony’s tail and having to cut it out with nail clippers! Sorry Mum! Back in its original box where it rightfully belongs along with its brush, ribbon and collectable poster, this year’s My Little Pony is a nostalgic delight.
Jamie of Daddy & Dad at the UK Toy Fair
My heroes Sonic The Hedgehog
One for the 90s SEGA kids among us, Sonic’s back again with a marvellous new range of electronic and plush toys from Zappies. My fave is the Sonic radio-controlled car – complete with electronic front and rear lights and a turbo function. Cool, eh?
Brand: Zappies Available: Now Guide price: £26.99
Batman and Robin
I’ve always preferred the sidekick to the hero. Penfold, Scrappy Do, Gromit, they’re all excellent. But my all-time favourite sidekick is Robin. Stylish, loyal and a tiny bit camp, Robin is my hero. Lyall and Rich (my boys) are 100% convinced Robin is Batman’s house-husband, by the way. Anyway, these little four-inch action fi gures from Spin Master each arrive with three mystery accessories and a collectable card.
Brand: Spin Master Available: Now RRP: £7.99
Power up Power Pux collectables
Thinking back to the 80s again, do you remember those little rubber discs that popped up into the air? Well, they’ve been brought into the 21st Century thanks to Power Pux from Vivid Toys. There are 50 Power Pux to collect, along with ‘launcher’ sets. In essence, you push your little Power Pux down with your hand or use one of the special launchers to launch it across the table where it will pop admirably up into the air. Excellent fun!
Brand: Vivid Toy Group Available: Now Price: From £2.99
Goal! Subbuteo
Subbuteo’s always been a fi rm favourite in the Daddy & Dad household – the fantastic detail in the little players and the tiny scale of the accessories is very impressive. Also, get this... Subbuteo fi rst appeared in British homes in 1946! Talk about nostalgia. Ahead of Euro 2020, University Games has teamed up (excuse the pun) with Hasbro to launch a feel-good advertising campaign and a new line of Subbuteo games and accessories. The new sets, with greatly improved detail including players with diff erent colour football boots and hairstyles, will be available in stores from April.
Brand: University Games Available: April Price: TBC
Top pick... great scott!
Playmobil Back to the Future TM
I’m fl ying the fl ag for Playmobil this year. Their toys are robust, waterproof, gender-neutral and (most importantly) competitively priced compared with other ‘self-assembly’ toy brands. Which brings me on to my absolute top favourite toy for 2020 – Playmobil Back to the Future. With 2020 marking the 35th anniversary of the original cult fi lm, Playmobil’s 70317 Back to the Future DeLorean is a beautifully detailed, interactive scale model of the fi lm’s time machine. The DeLorean comes with retractable wheels (for fl ying purposes), an illuminated ‘fl ux capacitor’ and insertable plutonium, plus 17-year-old Marty McFly, the eff ervescent ‘Doc’ Brown and even Einstein the dog!
Brand: Playmobil Available: May Price: £49.99
Find Daddy & Dad on Instagram @daddyanddad and www.daddyanddad.co.uk
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I love you but you make me want to scream! By Sunayana Clark
#parentlife #empower #keepcalm
We love and adore our kids. But sometimes, they frustrate us with their obstinacy or refusal to even try our suggestions that it makes us feel like screaming! This obstinacy is present in your two-year-old, four-yearold and 16-year-old! They want to do things their way and no amount of reasoning works. can decide to help them choose their course of action. This empowers your children and helps you to model problem solving to your children. However this path can still leave you feeling a mixed bag of emotions: anger, frustration or worry which can spill out into other areas of your life. To stop this, you must prioritise looking after yourself. around the park – the exercise will help you to calm down and the laughing will remind you how much you love them. It negates the frustration. With an older child who can be left alone, distract yourself by talking to a friend, watching a funny video or popping out. This gives you both breathing and thinking space.
Why? Often it’s because they want independence and to feel empowered to choose what they want to choose. But we, as parents, have a diff erent perspective because of life experience. We want to help them avoid the pitfalls that we experienced. We want to make their lives easier, smoother and less painful. However, we are experiential creatures, which means we grow through experience. When they experience frustration and pain, they learn how to deal with problems, come up with good solutions and become resilient. You have a choice: keep insisting that they do things the way you want them to (and therefore keep repeating the cycle of arguments, frustration and anger) or you So state your position and then stop engaging in conversations with your child or your spouse about this situation. Change your response to non-committal answers. For example: if your partner says “they should be trying more” you can respond with a “yes, I agree” or a “I will think about that”. When we engage in the same conversations, we activate those same emotions of anger, frustration again. By choosing not to respond, we allow those emotions to subside. Arguments often take place in the house, so change your environment. If you have a younger child, go to the park with them (even though you don’t want to). Run around with them, throw a ball, chase them Lastly, do something nice for yourself – treat yourself to a delicious hot drink, cook your favourite meal or have a candle lit bubble bath and a glass of Prosecco. Parenting is hard work! You deserve the rewards that you can give yourself. As you practice empowering your children, keeping calm and rewarding yourself, you will notice that you won’t want to scream any more and you will remember that you are here to guide your children rather than force them to do things your way. Feelgood Treatments T: 07515 561514 www.feelgoodtreatments.co.uk #rewardyourself
share their springtime favourites for dog loving families
ASK US!
Isobel & Victoria are on hand to answer you dog and baby questions so fi re away…
What’s hot for your pooch right now
Fetch & Fellow X Kana London Dog Bowl –starting around £32 www.fetchandfollow.com Our favourite thing right now are these handmoulded (in the UK) ceramic bowls by Fetch & Fellow not only is it strong and designed to be heavy weight so that your dog doesn’t slide the bowl about, they also look super stylish in any home.
What’s hot for mamas
All Dogs Matter Jumpers – starting at £10 www.alldogsmatter.co.uk The best thing in our wardrobes are cosy jumpers that you can throw on with jeans or leggings for daily dog walks and, with the weather slowly changing and not needing that extra coat layer, we need lots of this wardrobe staple right now. What could be more perfect than these cool slogan jumpers.
And one for the kids...
Living Nature French Bulldog Puppy Plush Soft Toy – £13 www.johnlewis.com These life-like plush toys come in a range of breeds and are great for your kids so that they can take a version of your dog to bed.
We both use Baby Bjorns, having tested out loads of diff erent ones before investing (through sling libraries, borrowing from friends and so on), as they are a little pricey, but funnily enough the Baby Bjorns felt the most comfortable for us both. Great for when the babies are a little older and can face outwards and enjoy the walks with you.
Emma, mum to be from Dulwich Which sling do you use with your babies when out and about dog walking?
Quick top tip for dog mamas
Get outta town!
One of our favourite out of London day trips for the whole family at the moment is visiting Windsor Great Park. About an hour drive from North and South London, bit closer from West (slightly too far from East). We parked in the Virginia Water car park which has good toilet facilities, lovely little kiosks where you can grab a coff ee/snack and lovely walks around the park that both kids and dogs enjoy. Check out their website for more information. www.windsorgreatpark.co.uk
48 | Cherubs Magazine Paperchase is dog friendly and perfect for nipping in for those last minute birthday cards. Find your nearest store at www.paperchase.com
@poochesandprams www.poochesandprams.co.uk If you have a question please email us at hello@poochesandprams.co.uk
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Battling through postnatal depression with creativity
Depression and I go hand in hand and have done since I was 11 or 12. Looking back, it was pretty mild, didn’t last long, and was generally part of my personality. My sister tells me I was always very extreme as a child, either very very happy or very very sad. I’m still like that now.
When I fell pregnant the fi rst time, back in 2013, I had a tough fi rst few months, as I think we all do, but then once I hit 20 weeks I felt depression like nothing I’ve experienced before. It was like a black cloud sat on my shoulders, and it just didn’t go away. Weeks and weeks it hovered there until I went to my GP, and together we decided on anti-depressants. They did help, but I still struggled, so I received talking therapy and antenatal counselling too. Once my son was born the depression, weirdly, went away and I had a brilliant fi rst year with him. When we decided to try for another baby, depression was a distant
memory, and one that only aff ected me during pregnancy so what were we waiting for? I fell pregnant when Archie was 13 months old, and it was not plain sailing.
The depression kicked in pretty quickly and didn’t stop. After months of feeling lower than I’d ever felt and feeling guilty for being too tired and sick to play with Archie a lot, I had a very quick and pretty ideal birth – no stitches and only gas and air! I felt so confi dent and brilliant that day. Then we got home and everything just got worse and worse. I couldn’t smile, I could barely lift myself out of bed, the smallest tasks were so overwhelming, so our tiny home was constantly a mess, and I was broken. I had never felt anything like it and thinking back on it is still very hard, even four years on.
My GP was amazing, and still hasn’t written me a repeat prescription, meaning I have to go and see her every two months to get my medication so she can check I’m doing ok. She and others referred me on to social services, the crisis team, Home-Start, PIPs, IAPT – these are all amazing services that helped me. Although I think my husband got a shock when the crisis team showed up on our doorstep the day the GP called them! He hadn’t realised how bad things had got for me until then, so even though it was a really scary time, it needed to happen.
I ended up getting lots of support – we have an amazing community of people who live nearby who cooked meals for us and came round to keep me company. We got a free nursery place for Archie, which meant he went to a local nursery for 15 hours a week, I had a volunteer from Home-Start come every week for four hours to help me with things like food shopping or just playing with the boys. Sometimes she just sent me to bed and I could catch up on sleep – Teddy didn’t sleep through the night until he was nearly three years old. I had CBT, and therapy with the Parent and Infant Psychology Service, which is full of amazing professional counsellors who specialise in parent-baby bonding and development,
and my health visitor came to do baby massage at my home, just for me and Teddy, while Archie was at nursery. I still felt absolutely rubbish, but I had a lot of help and knew that it was just a case of managing my depression and finding ways to live with it. That’s when I discovered how much being creative helped. I’ve always been creative, I grew up in a house full of professional musicians, was a professional singer for a few years during and after University, did art at A level and had been sewing and knitting since I was wee. So I knew I enjoyed making things but hadn’t had the opportunity to get my sewing machine out since having two kids under two! On days when Archie was at nursery, I used to find myself wandering slowly around little boutique shops where I live for hours with the buggy, just for something to do. I’d walk around in some kind of depression and sleep-deprived stupor, not taking anything in but enjoying the calm and beautiful surroundings. One day I spotted a (rather ugly) zip pouch that looked just about big enough for nappies and wipes, and suddenly I just knew I needed it. If you have little ones you will know how messy the changing bag can get. Especially if you have older ones who are eating food – that’s when you find half a rice cake stuck to the wipes right at the bottom of the bag, right? I found it hard enough to get out of the house with two little ones, but with postnatal depression and chronic sleep deprivation added into the mix, it was a recipe for major anxiety, lots of shouting and lots of tears every time we left the house. Have you ever been in a situation where you’re out and the baby does such a spectacular poo that it goes up to its back, and down its legs? And somehow poo gets on their socks and you’ve no idea what to do? Imagine that, but with no wipes in the bag – are you with me? Panic and mum-failure central! Enough to reduce anyone to tears. So, I bought the ugly pouch and put wipes, two nappies and a couple of nappy bags in there. It was the one thing I had to focus on as I was leaving the house – do I have the nappy pouch? It could go in my changing bag or at the bottom of the buggy, or my backpack if I was carrying one of the boys in a sling. It also meant I could grab it quickly and know I had everything on-hand for a nappy change straight away. It sounds like a little thing but it made me feel like I had succeeded at something – like I was in control of just one tiny thing, and like I had things together. I quickly went and bought another one for spare clothes, and then one day a friend told me she could teach me to make my own zip pouches. It was like a lightbulb went on. I was so excited. I had a huge fabric stash (much to my husband’s frustration) and had beautiful pieces of fabric that I just had because I found them beautiful, but had no idea what to make with them. So, I used my favourites to make some of my first zip pouches. I started making them for friends and made four for a friend who was having her second baby. She’s now got three kids and I know she still uses all four pouches every single day. It was an escape for me from parenting, which made me feel crazily guilty for needing an escape, and even more guilty for actually taking it, but was necessary. I could spend naptimes cutting and sewing the most gorgeous fabric, for people I loved, that I knew they’d find useful and make them smile every day. I was starting to get a bit of myself back too, in discovering I could do something practical to help myself, and others. Once I had honed my skills I could get a pouch cut and sewn in 30 minutes. It felt like an achievement to be able to start and finish a task in one sitting, and now I’ve got it down to 20 minutes and I feel like a pouch sewing ninja! “I’d walk around in some kind of depression and sleepdeprived stupor”
About half of my pouches are sewn from gorgeous cotton fabrics, and the other half are printed with flock vinyl, which is kind of furry and very pleasing to feel. I handletter phrases, words and names, which was another thing that helped me – I was constantly doodling and drawing, so why not learn calligraphy and hand-lettering and do something useful with it? I had a friend who I’d met on a breastfeeding peer supporter training course, and once you’ve sat in a room with someone and talked about boobs, nipples, good latches, bad latches, bleeding nipples and practised listening exercises with them for months, you can’t help but stay pretty close friends. She had her own business making personalised clothes and aprons and had all the kit in her studio at home. I asked if I could come and try out some of the stuff to make my own pouches with my hand-lettered designs, and just fell in love with the whole process. I could make any design, cut it out of any colour flock vinyl I wanted, and heat press it onto a pouch. It was like magic. I spent so many happy times there with her, she helped me gain confidence with the machinery and programmes she used, and she was like my little cheerleader right at the start of Grizzli Bear.
I don’t remember the first year of Teddy’s life, it’s very hazy, very dark and very difficult for me to focus in on. I think my brain just deleted most of it because I was having such an awful time. But I remember starting Grizzli Bear and beginning that journey, and that has helped me focus more on time with my boys. Coming home from an afternoon creating cool products made smiling and engaging with my boys so much easier and I found so much more joy in being with them.
It took three and a half years for my postnatal depression to fully clear. Grizzli Bear has been running for two years, and I hope it’ll help plenty more mums and dads feel that they have everything they need to get out of the house with their kids and face anything they can throw at them, even if that is scrambled egg and poo!
www.grizzlibear.com
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