City Weekly March 16, 2017 by Copperfield Publishing

C I T Y W E E K LY. N E T

MARCH 16, 2017 | VOL. 33

N0. 45

Recognizing the year's worst government transparency offenders. p. 14

CWCONTENTS CURSES! FOILED AGAIN!

INTERNATIONAL TATTOO CONVENTION

Open your records to me, baby. I hold the lock and you hold the key. Cover illustration by Hugh D’Andrade

CONTRIBUTOR

4 LETTERS 6 OPINION 8 NEWS 18 A&E 22 DINE 28 CINEMA 30 TRUE TV 31 MUSIC 43 COMMUNITY

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COVER STORY

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DAVE MAASS

Cover story, p. 14

Before joining the Electronic Frontier Foundation, Maass earned his alt stripes at the Santa Fe Reporter and San Diego CityBeat. “Each year, the community of watchdogs leveraging public records laws grows,” he says. “While many reporters need to remain laserfocused on dispassionately reporting stories, I really enjoy helping by calling out those in power who stand in their way.”

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Utah named one of the ‘lamest’ states for St. Paddy’s. facebook.com/slcweekly

CULTURE

Local artist chooses Etch-ASketch as preferred medium.

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COMMENTS@CITYWEEKLY.NET @SLCWEEKLY

@CITYWEEKLY

@SLCWEEKLY

Cover story, March 2, “Local Music Issue”

Thanks @CityWeekly and Randy Harward for mentioning my bro and I in the same breath with Sri Whipple and @danielclowes. Unreal.

@JUKEANDJIVE Via Twitter

❤ Thank you for the honorable mention. ❤

@SOFIASCOTTROCKS

I grew up here my whole life. I’m sickened of what’s become of Sugar House; no charm whatsoever now! Oh, maybe we should build another Ross, TJ Maxx, Walmart, etc. and shove it right up governor pointy man Herbert’s ass?

I go to the parade every year and enjoy the festivities all day long. But there’s not much us non-LDS members can enjoy anymore these days because apparently there is no fucking separation of church and state.

Via Facebook

Tragic. Utah has become wall-to-wall tacky housing developments. That’s what you get with MASSIVE reproduction. Via Facebook

Erin go Bragh! I’m Irish, lived in Utah for nine years, and there are not a lot of Irish in Utah. I was actually asked a few times why I looked different. LOL. My reply: “Irish.”

Sad. Truly sad.

Via Facebook

CARLOS EDMUNDS

Via Twitter

Least rowdy on an observance that has no relevance to the region, population or culture of the state. Why is that odd? You don’t see Dublin making a big fuss over Pioneer Day.

Couldn’t you pick that up and move it?

Via Facebook

When the state is by differing estimates 60-70 percent Moron—er, Mormon—it effectively makes Utah a much smaller state of less than a million normal people. Simple religious demographics. Add Momobased restrictions on the number of liquor licenses for restaurants and bars and a few more stupid liquor laws and there goes our reputation!

Protect our household budgets

REES VANDERSLICE

MIKE SCHMAUCH

Via Instagram Awesome cover.

@PHILLYTOSLC

KATHY MCDONOUGH

KENDRA HALL

Via Instagram

News, March 2, “The Day the Pouring Died”

The [Bar in Sugarhouse] managers Spencer and Lisa had more loyalties to employees and customers than any business owners I’ve ever known! They held out, throughout a continuous battle with the property owners around us. It was a battle we would have lost now or later. Most employees left on a great note with Spencer and Lisa and will continue a friendship with them. But there’s always that one rotten potato in the bag. Thanks to all that made the last week of The Bar in Sugarhouse a memorable goodbye!

CHRISTAL LEDERMAN Via cityweekly.net

Sugar House continues to be the local poster child for a funky, thriving neighborhood strangled by overdevelopment and homogeneity.

MICHAEL ADAMSON

We’ll never be able to keep nice things.

@VIRGILGLASS

We will be doing our part to dispel these nasty rumors!

SCOUT MILLER

COREY HILDEBRAND

Blog, March 9, “Utah ranked one of the ‘least rowdy’ during St. Patrick’s Day” Or at any other time of the year.

@UTAH_CANNABIS Via Twitter

JENNY CORNWALL

Utah is one of the lamest states to celebrate any special day. Except July 24.

@FREDASCHMAUCH Via Twitter

Surprised that we beat out two states.

Via Facebook

MIKE SARGENT

Sugar House is dead. Its entire neighborhood feel is disappearing in all the congestion from over-commercialization.

If you hold your parade in a mall, you get a mall parade.

Via Facebook

Via Facebook Utah isn’t especially Irish, and not especially Catholic. Really not surprising that we don’t come out in droves for an Irish Catholic holiday.

MICHAEL JAMES BILLS Via Facebook

Via Facebook

CASEN COURTNEY ANDERSON

MICHAEL BALL

WHY I HATE CHASE

Drinking yourself sick has nothing to do with St. Patrick. It’s kind of insulting to his memory.

AUTUMN BAROWSKI

Via Facebook Who are you kidding? None of you are drinking any Jameson.

MICHAEL O’HAIR

After all the promises by our elected officials to help working Americans, their solution is to raise prices on the everyday items we buy. We need tax reform that will ensure our economy grows and creates more jobs, not create higher prices for consumers. You don’t need to be an economist to understand that a border adjustment tax on imports will ultimately be passed on to consumers. It means higher prices on groceries, gas, medicine and clothing. Many working families could be paying up to $1,700 more per year for these basic needs. That’s a rough hit that Utah families can’t afford. As a struggling middle-class worker, I certainly don’t expect immediate change, and I’m not looking for handouts. But please don’t make life harder on us by making our basic needs more expensive. I encourage Senator Hatch to oppose this misguided tax policy and protect Utahns’ household budgets.

SUZANNE GLEED,

Via Facebook

Lehi

STAFF Publisher JOHN SALTAS Editorial

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OPINION

Shamrock Surprise

For religious observance, most of us tend to stick to our own cultures, except we have almost universally embraced two religionbased holidays that have Celtic or Irish origins. In the fall, there is Halloween, which is often explained as being of Gaelic Pagan origin, with witches and spells, etc. And in March, everyone seems to go bonkers over St. Patrick’s Day, which is a full-on celebration of the patron Saint of Ireland. When I was a kid growing up in Brooklyn, N.Y., we all dressed up in costume for Halloween and canvassed for candy door-to-door, just like everybody else. But I didn’t know that the holiday was attached to the Irish, nor did I know that springtime holiday for Saint Patrick was, well, for a Catholic saint. Everyone in my neighborhood was Jewish and everyone in the next neighborhood over was black. I don’t know what religion(s) they were, but they, too, celebrated Halloween and St. Patrick’s Day. After I graduated college, I went to work at the phone company (back then, of course, there was only one phone company). Most of the top management were Protestant and the middle and lower rungs were predominantly Irish Catholic. Mary Russell, the first woman to become a manager at the company in New York, was a mentor to me. She was Irish and she told me that “the company” liked Irish Catholics because Catholics were taught in parochial school to take orders, do what they are told and not talk back. I take that, today, as being the view of corporate America in the ’70s. Both she and her boss Gene Carey told me I had a great future at New York Telephone because—and I remember this as clearly as if it were yesterday—“You are young, smart and Jewish. We don’t have many Jews in the company. You can go far.” I worked at a

B Y S TA N R O S E N Z W E I G

desk with a Puerto Rican and they told him just about the same thing. Anyway, this is a St. Patrick’s Day story, so I’m getting ahead of myself. One day, Mary told me that she had volunteered herself and me to run the St. Patrick’s Day party in our office. Considering the preponderance of Irish Catholic coworkers, this was a big deal. Mary got us a budget and we went shopping for decorations during a few successive lunch times. We got green cups, green hats and green paper tablecloths and napkins, and Canada Dry ginger ale, because Canada Dry came in green bottles with green labels. “Why do we do everything in green?” I wanted to know. “It’s tradition,” she answered. “In fact, both green and orange are traditions.” So, she also bought some orange decorations. What she didn’t mentor me on was that the basis of green and orange dated back to the year 1690 when Protestant King William III of England, aka William of Orange, brought his orange army to Ireland, kicked the ass of Roman Catholic King James II and took over the country, causing what, up until recently, was referred to as “the troubles,” the longest continuous revolution I can recall. So the Irish Catholics wear green, a sign of the Emerald Isle and the shamrock, while the Protestants wear orange. Mary bought a lot of green things and enough orange to decorate one office. I didn’t know about any of the politics, but I was young and eager to help. So, Mary told me that orange was special and we should decorate our boss Gene Carey’s office in orange, which we did, then closed the door and went home. Did I mention that Mr. Carey also was Catholic? Irish people are a lot like the rest of us— Mormons, Jews, Mexicans, Navajos, Blacks. We all tend to be a bit sensitive about things we can discuss freely among our own folks,

but don’t like when others do the same. We each hold our culture personal. This green and orange thing is a good part of that. Another thing is the symbol of the shamrock, which any red-blooded Irish person will tell you is the sign of the trinity. Within the past few news cycles, our president and his team got taught that lesson the hard way when they tried to tie St. Patrick’s Day to Trump’s 2020 presidential campaign by selling “Make America Great Again” baseball hats in Irish green instead of the current hats that are more like Russian red. I seem to remember that, during the last campaign, then-candidate Trump bragged to us, “I am really rich,” and that he would bankroll his entire campaign himself and not be indebted to donors. Today, several of his highest-level appointees, we note, have turned out to be big, huge campaign donors and he needs to sell $50 hats and T-shirts to the rest of us. Now that’s what I call “really rich”. Neither the green hat color nor the expensive price is the problem. What offends many Irish is that the hats have four-leaf clovers embossed on them. When Irish around the world saw those four-leaf clovers instead of the Trinity-based three-leaf shamrocks which are the real symbol, they created a Twitter storm the likes of which we haven’t even seen from the White House Twitterer-in-Chief. To be fair and balanced, people of the world over are sensitive and protective about their own culture—which is why, when my phone company manager came to work the next morning and saw everything in his office from desk to drapes in bright orange, he sat me down for a history lesson on Ireland that I remember to this day. By the way, never say St. Patty’s day. Patty is a girl’s name, I have been told. CW Send feedback to comments@cityweekly.net.

WE EACH HOLD OUR CULTURE PERSONAL. THIS GREEN AND ORANGE THING IS A GOOD PART OF THAT.

Readers can comment at cityweekly.net

What’s been your most memorable St. Patrick’s Day? John Saltas: Chicago 1981. Chicago River colored bright green. Massive crowds downtown—I’d never seen that as a Utah boy. Dancing at The Lodge on Division. Learning over 500 people were arrested for being sundry fun causes. I kept my green carnation from that day for years.

Lisa Dorelli: I used to bartend at Piper Down Pub and the line around the building would begin around 10 a.m. and last until the bitter end. We hired folks to simply feed us bites of protein bars throughout our shift as we were slinging drinks and fighting the crowds. It was such a fun energy, regardless of the 17-hour shifts.

Jeremiah Smith: I remember being super embarrassed, when in fifth grade I opened my lunch to see my mom had dyed my sandwich green. I know, I was a 10-year-old jerk. Love you, Mom. Scott Renshaw: I don’t ever remember making it a point to treat it as a special day. Where is the holiday for non-Irish people who don’t particularly care for parades or bars, huh?

Andrea Harvey: In second or third grade, our class was ravaged by a gang of naughty leprechauns. They knocked over desks, made a huge mess and left their little green handprints everywhere. It was freaky.

Randy Harward: The time when I stumbled upon the end of the rainbow and met a man called Seamus O’Slainte. Once he was satisfied that I was not, in fact, after his Lucky Charms, we had a fine time getting blarney stoned on Four-Leaf Kush. And then he shared with me what he thought I’d come to take from him (we went through three boxes that day).

Nicole Enright: In 2013, I got so blackout drunk that I fell down the stairs at Gracie’s. That’s actually how I met everyone at City Weekly and ended up getting my job here.

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FIVE SPOT

RANDOM QUESTIONS, SURPRISING ANSWERS

Many have heard the term “cultural appropriation” in the context of Halloween costumes, but aren’t aware of the many facets and their repercussions for those on the receiving end. That’s why local nonprofit PANDOS, (Peaceful Advocates for Native Dialogue and Organizing Support, pandos.org) hosts a panel discussion on March 27. Panelist James Hernandez—a Native American who serves as education chair for the PANDOS board—has studied cultural appropriation, particularly relating to Natives, as a grad student in the Education, Culture and Society program in the University of Utah’s School of Education. As a member of the Tehuan Band of Mission Indians of San Antonio and with a B.A. in psychology, it’s safe to say he knows his stuff.

What is cultural appropriation? It’s when someone, or even a group of people, learn something—like a skill, technique or style—and use it for profit … or in a way that is demeaning to the original practice. So appropriation also serves to limit people in a specific time or promote stereotypes that serve to degrade the culture being emulated.

Like when someone wears a headdress as a Halloween costume? That’s a big one that people use often, and it’s not taken as seriously as it should, but it still has to be said. … It’s being used for profit and it’s used for fashion, or used in a way that it was not originally intended. Its original and current intent is for people with high honor in the American-Indian community. … Whenever I think of that one, I think of the military. It would be very disrespectful for someone to wear a medal they did not earn. Or maybe even a Purple Heart. That [comparison] usually gets to people.

What are some other examples?

‘Spiritual practices’ or ‘spiritual getaways.’ They try to emulate American-Indians’ spiritual practices, but they’re people that are outside traditional or indigenous

What are the repercussions? For me, I look specifically at young people. When young people see their culture—and I’m thinking specifically about AmericanIndian people, but it could be, you know, with any other culture—being made fun of or devalued, such as through appropriation, they eventually internalize negative images and refuse to associate with what’s part of their identity … especially people who belong to cultures that have a history of trauma. … It serves to kind of erase history and recreate its own. So when people who are of that culture see it, they’re saying, ‘They’re me; I don’t actually recognize that, so is the problem with me or with them?’ And when you’re a child, it’s very confusing to see all these different misrepresentations of your culture.

Have the awareness and rhetoric shown any signs of progression? Within this last century, people have written about it, but it really has not been taken seriously. Even now, the only reason I know what I know about it is because of specialized classes. That’s another issue—the idea that you have to specialize in AmericanIndian studies to learn these things. … There are also those that understand that appropriation is dangerous, and for those people, this discussion will allow them to leave with at least a vocabulary to speak about the effects of appropriation, and they’ll have a better, well-rounded understanding of it.

And I understand that, and that’s why the other side of it is—it’s OK to call someone out, but you also have to be supportive. Many people love to be the social-justice warrior that says, ‘You’re doing this wrong, you’re doing this wrong, you’re doing this wrong.’ But they don’t want to be the one to say, ‘You’re doing this wrong, I understand where you’re coming from and let’s figure out how we can do it a different way.’ That’s exhausting. And that’s why we can’t do it all to everybody. JAMES HERNANDEZ

8 | MARCH 16, 2017

communities. They charge a large sum of money to participate, when usually those ceremonies are not something you charge for; they’re something that’s given. … It degrades the practice of the originating people. For instance, outsiders who don’t know about the practice may view it as more legitimate because there is a fee, while if an actual spiritual leader from that community did it for free, an outsider might see that as something that’s not as valuable.

It seems a lot of people are afraid to talk about this. Even when they want to be an ally, they’d rather just avoid the topic.

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HITS&MISSES BY KATHARINE BIELE @kathybiele

Bring Your own Facts

It’s official: Facts are now optional. Utah legislators and much of the populace are so ready to believe whatever they want. “You know, we’re all entitled to our own facts. Doctors are entitled to their own facts,” Sen. Curtis Bramble, R-Provo, said on yet another abortion notification bill. You know, for those poor, uninformed women who now risk being more uninformed if Planned Parenthood funding gets scrapped. And Bramble, being a man with no medical background, is the right person for this legislation. In a screed about federalism, he faced the camera to say, “Ladies, there weren’t any women in the room” during the Constitutional Convention of 1787. Bramble was basing his abortive facts on the “truthiness” of anti-abortion doctor George Delgado, whose “abortion pill reversal” technique has been widely discredited, as a ThinkProgress article noted. But you never know, do you? It’s like the lottery. You might win.

Jumping the Gun

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It’s not like Utah’s two daily newspapers went to different Legislatures, but you might not know that from the headlines. The front page of the Deseret News proclaimed the 2017 session was “kinder” and “gentler.” The Salt Lake Tribune saw a “peekaboo session,” as lawmakers chose “efficiency over transparency” with “limited discussion.” They’re both right, but kinder and gentler might not be what the public needs if it means closed caucuses and unilateral decision-making. The discussions were limited because the opposition party is limited. But let’s go back to Curt Bramble and his video on federalism. He said the “miracle” of the Constitution was that 55 men with very different opinions could sit in the same room and hammer out a solution. That, of course, was then.

Legislature Reflection

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This session saw another bill bolstering the idea that concealing a gun is just good for everyone. This bill, from well-meaning mind of Rep. Karianne Lisonbee, R-Clearfield, seeks to allow 18-year-olds to hide their pieces. Lisonbee testified that a couple of college-age women asked for the law, you know, because most college campuses don’t allow students to open-carry their guns. Sen. Todd Weiler, R-Woods Cross, cited a Justice Department study that said up to 25 percent of college-aged women would be raped during their college years. While there are competing studies on how to prevent rape, the emphasis has been on women—the don’t-get-raped message—rather than men—don’t rape. Sen. Luz Escamilla, D-Salt Lake, offered statistics about guns being the primary method of suicide among teens. But that wasn’t a fact the Senate wanted to hear.

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Can you tell me about the role bacteria play in our lives? I read once about a woman who got a fecal transplant from her obese daughter. Talk about unintended consequences: The woman became obese. Is that possible? —Art Erickson

The role bacteria play in our lives? More like the role we play in theirs. The human body is made up of 10 trillion cells governed by about 23,000 genes; the microorganisms that reside within it, mainly in the digestive tract, account for 100 trillion cells and about 3 million genes—we’re mightily outnumbered in our own innards. This gut microbiota, as they’re collectively known, doesn’t present a unified front, though: Its constituent species compete for resources, and you may be seeing the results of those skirmishes every time you step on the scale. As science searches for direct ways to help people lose weight (or at least accumulate it more slowly), scrutiny has turned to those critters deep inside you that affect digestion and fat storage. Or, more frequently, the equivalent critters deep inside mice. Among the key players in gut bacteria research are “germ-free” mice, bred and raised in hermetic isolation to have no microbiota at all. Compared to normal germy mice, germ-free mice have to eat 30 percent more calories to maintain the same body weight, and they don’t gain weight even on high-calorie, high-fat diets. A 2004 study found that conventional mice had 42 percent more body fat than their GF peers; when gut microbiota from conventional mice were transplanted into GFs, their body fat jumped up by 60 percent in 10 days. When GF mice receive bacteria transplants from obese mice, they grow obese, while transplanting bacteria from lean mice keeps them lean. And a new mouse study from December suggests that gut bacterial colonies could be responsible for rebound weight gain after dieting—back when human ancestors endured feast-andfamine cycles, hosting bacteria that helped maintain your baseline weight might have been an evolutionary edge. The microbiota sure seems to be doing something weightwise, then, and it’s been suspected for a while that the balance of bacterial species may be a key factor in this. Around 90 percent of the bacteria in the human gut hail from one of two phyla, Bacteroidetes and Firmicutes. The proportional size of each population varies widely, though—genetics, diet and weight all seemingly play a role, as do things like use of antibiotics—and a number of studies suggest that metabolic issues often turn up in tandem with a high ratio of Firmicutes to Bacteroidetes. Obese mice have more Firmicutes and fewer Bacteroidetes, but if you put put those mice on a fat- or carbohydrate-restricted diet for a year, the Bacteroidetes take over. And researchers who measured the energy left over in human poop (by burning it—and you complain about your job) found that a 20 percent increase in the Firmicutes-Bacteroidetes ratio meant an extra 150 calories got absorbed from food daily. An imbalance of bacteria

BY CECIL ADAMS

SLUG SIGNORINO

STRAIGHT DOPE Bacteria

might not only affect fat storage and vitamin metabolism, but also how full we feel after eating. Though the F-B balance doesn’t correlate consistently with obesity itself, there’s a stronger association with other obesityrelated health problems. Type-2 diabetics seem to have fewer Bacteroidetes than nondiabetics, possibly due to how bacteria in the colon help digest dietary fiber. Obese and pre-diabetic persons ferment fiber into greater amounts of a chemical called butyrate—produced mainly by Firmicutes— which affects liver glucose levels and fat production. More broadly, your gut bacteria balance may influence your potential for developing nonalcoholic fatty liver disease, and could be the root cause for the increase in cancers, especially liver cancer, that disproportionately strike the obese. But tinkering with this stuff can lead to other trouble: A 2015 Austrian paper found that attempts to manipulate the microbiota balance via fasting could cause degradation of the intestinal mucus—aka the stuff that keeps waste matter out of your bloodstream. OK, OK, so how do you alter your gutbacteria demographics to shed some pounds? The most extreme option for obese folks is a fecal microbiota transplant from a leaner donor, a therapy still in its experimental stages. As discussed here in a 2014 column on probiotics, introducing bacteria from the stool of a healthy volunteer has worked wonders with patients suffering from certain serious digestive-tract issues. But though studies are underway, researchers haven’t yet been able to induce weight loss through the same procedure—and in fact, as Art reports above, there has indeed been a case where a woman’s body mass index jumped into the obese range following a fecal transplant from her daughter. There are, of course, less drastic methods. Claims for the benefits of probiotic supplements struck me as overblown back in 2014; since then, some small-scale studies on probiotics and weight loss have looked more promising, but it’s still early. For now, you could always just ditch highly processed foods—a more natural diet means more nutrients get digested in the large intestine, where the “good” bacteria can do their thing more readily. That might take a little discipline, but until the craptransplant people get their act together, it’s probably your best bet. n Send questions via straightdope.com or c/o Chicago Reader, 350 N. Orleans, Chicago 60654.

THE

OCHO

CITIZEN REVOLT In a week, you can CHANGE THE WORLD

The Science of Brewing...

THE LIST OF EIGHT

BY BILL FROST

@Bill _ Frost

8. Pro: The Young Dubliners only come around in March.

7. Con: Local irritating “Celtic” 6. Pro: Women in short kilts. 5. Con: Dudes in kilts of any length.

4. Pro: Cinco de Mayo, the fake holiday with the good food, is only seven weeks away.

2. Pro: Green coloring makes 3.2 tap beer at least somewhat festive.

could now get you an orange jumpsuit for a DUI.

You’d better learn what to do now as the climate deniers pack the White House and threaten the future of the globe. That’s not an exaggeration. Scott Pruitt, the new head of the Environmental Protection Agency, made it clear that he doesn’t think carbon dioxide emissions are “a primary contributor to the global warming that we see.” A Chicago Tribune article said a staggering majority of scientists are being drowned out by this “sensible non-scientist.” So if you belong to an organization interested in climate or want to get involved, now is the time to connect with activist groups, hear local highlights on current and future projects, and give your input on the next steps at the Spring 2017 All Network Meeting. Utah’s Hogle Zoo-RendeZoo Room, 2600 Sunnyside Ave., Tuesday, March 21, 9-10:30 a.m., free, utahclimateactionnetwork.com

—KATHARINE BIELE Send tips to revolt@cityweekly.net

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1. Con: One green 3.2 tap beer

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probably have it outlawed by then.

What do you really know about the Bears Ears controversy? It was enough to send Outdoor Retailer packing, even while local leaders scrambled to entice them back. But, funny thing: The Native American perspective in all this was shoved to the back of the bus. You can learn about the interplay of tribal sovereignty with the Bears Ears and Dakota Access pipeline movements during The Significance of Sovereignty: Lessons Learned from Standing Rock and Bears Ears, which examines the roots of tribal sovereignty and its relationship with the federal government. The concept is widely misunderstood and, in both of these issues, competed with social justice and civil rights. Salt Lake City Public Library, 210 E. 400 South, Thursday, March 23, 6:30-8:30 p.m., free, bit.ly/2mPLSNe

3. Con: President Cheeto will

TRIBAL SOVEREIGNTY 101

“pub” bands work year-round.

With all the talk about transgender bathrooms and gender discrimination, parents might want to hear from an expert. In an evening with the author, Christia Spears Brown, Ph.D., speaks about her book Parenting Beyond Pink and Blue: How to Raise Your Kids Free of Gender Stereotypes. The Clubhouse, 850 E. South Temple, 801-537-8604, Thursday, March 16, 6-8 p.m., $10 suggested donation; free to Y WCA members, bit.ly/2n8499j

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Eight pros and cons of St. Patrick’s Day in Utah.

GENDER UN-BENDING

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12 | MARCH 16, 2017

NEWS Secret Agent In the aftermath of the Swallow acquittal, questions dog a state investigator. BY STEPHEN DARK sdark@cityweekly.net @stephenpdark

hen a prosecutor presents his or her case, a key initial witness often is the detective or investigator who assembled evidence that a judge deemed sufficient to warrant a trial. That investigator lays out a map for the jury, detailing how they came to the conclusion that the defendant committed a crime. In the trial of former Utah Attorney General John Swallow, the Salt Lake County prosecutors put FBI Agent Jon Isakson on the stand. He was not their only possible choice of investigator to explain the case against Swallow; there was also State Bureau of Investigation’s Agent Scott Nesbitt. Nesbitt attended much, if not all, of the trial which saw Isakson implode on the stand when he testified as to why the Department of Justice declined to prosecute Swallow and former AG Mark Shurtleff. Implode, because Judge Elizabeth Rhuby-Mills had ordered that topic was not to be broached before the jury. Isakson suffered for his error, as Swallow’s lead defense counsel Scott Williams tore into his credibility and accused him of perjury. All the while, Nesbitt sat behind the prosecutors, in many ways the author of the two investigations, since he wrote many of the affidavits and search warrants that judges signed so investigators could search, among others, Shurtleff’s and Swallow’s homes. Shurtleff’s attorneys disputed Nesbitt’s affidavits in their motion to dismiss, arguing that the warrants contained dozens of “material omissions, misleading statements and outright mistruths.” Shurtleff filed a misconduct complaint against Nesbitt with the Department of Public Safety late last year, and shortly after Swallow’s acquittal also filed misconduct complaints against Isakson and his boss, Michelle Pickens. Well before Swallow’s trial, concerns about Nesbitt’s approach to investigating cases circulated among defense attorneys, painting him as an aggressive go-getter who would retaliate if he felt someone wasn’t cooperating with him. Businessman David Buttars went to prison in January 2017 for 1-15 years, only after Nesbitt pursued him and

CRIME & PUNISHMENT Buttars’ former girlfriend several times through the courts with cases that still leave defense attorneys scratching their heads. Cara Tangaro was co-counsel with Williams and Brad Anderson on the Swallow case and represented two other clients who found themselves in Nesbitt’s crosshairs—one of them Buttars. After reading “hundreds, if not thousands of pages of reports,” on the three cases, Tangaro says, “My concern with Nesbitt is I believe he picks the narrative and then does anything he can to move that narrative forward without taking into consideration evidence or interviews or people who go against that narrative. And the power that he has when he does that is extremely dangerous.” City Weekly sought to discuss with Nesbitt concerns that had arisen with four of his cases—Buttars, Buttars’ onetime girlfriend, Shurtleff and Swallow. The Department of Public Safety (DPS) responded that the threat of a Shurtleff lawsuit meant they couldn’t comment on his case. A complaint filed by Buttars with DPS against Nesbitt was investigated twice internally, as well as by the Utah AG and the Park City PD, the latter two investigations “reviewed” by the Utah County Attorney’s Office. “Agent Scott Nesbitt was cleared in all,” DPS spokesperson Marissa Cote writes in an email. According to court transcripts, Nesbitt began his career at the Davis County Sheriff’s Office, spent 10 years with Midvale PD as a patrol officer and detective, and the past seven at the Department of Public Safety’s State Bureau of Investigation. At SBI, he investigates cases in Utah, extending to seemingly run-of-the-mill stalking issues. In Buttars’ complaint about Nesbitt, which he provided to City Weekly prior to going to prison, he outlined how Nesbitt filed a criminal stalking charge against him based on allegations in a prior civil action by a former girlfriend of Buttars that a judge found lacked credibility and threw out of court. Nesbitt was case manager on the criminal stalking prosecution of the same allegations by the Salt Lake County DA’s office. Buttars’ attorney Skye Lazaro found Nesbitt’s driving of a class A misdemeanor stalking case, “really, really weird.” Buttars was acquitted of the criminal stalking charge. Shortly after the acquittal, the AG’s office filed security fraud and theft charges against Buttars and a second man, with Nesbitt again the lead investigator. Buttars’ partner, Mark LaCount, took a plea deal on a misdemeanor and $10,000 in restitution. Buttars, however, was hit with felonies. “Nesbitt was out to get me; there was no question,” Buttars said in a November 2016 interview shortly before going to prison. “They offered LaCount a deal. They

came after me with no deals and nine felony counts.” A jury found him guilty of fraud, but not guilty of theft. He has to pay restitution of $25,000. Several attorneys who worked on Buttars’ securities case characterized DPS’ pursuit of the first-time offender as a “witch hunt.” Rather than what often happens with white-collar crimes— victims complaining to the Attorney General’s Office—in Buttars’ case, investigator Nesbitt sought out investors. “The case didn’t come because people went to the AG and said they were defrauded; it came because the agent went to victims and said you were defrauded,” attorney Robert Cummings says. In what some saw as a crusade by Nesbitt to incarcerate Buttars, the ailing, middle-aged entrepreneur wasn’t the only one in the agent’s sights. Buttars filed his Nesbitt complaint with DPS in October 2014. A letter to Buttars from an SBI official dated Jan. 5, 2015, stated that his concerns “had been addressed and investigated.” Two-and-a-half weeks later, Nesbitt filed a charge of perjury against Renee Hieftje, an actress who’d appeared in numerous commercials and LDS films, including Saints and Soldiers. Hieftje dated Buttars for 18 months. Nesbitt alleged she had lied on the stand in Buttars’ criminal-stalking case while testifying for the defense. That testimony was on May 9, 2013—19 months prior to him filing the falsetestimony charge. Such was the interest at DPS in this case, a “Wanted” poster for Hieftje was created for “false or inconsistent material statements,” with her personal details and address. “If found, please book into jail,” it stated, above Nesbitt’s office phone number. DPS’ Cote says the document was produced “for internal purposes only.”

In a June 2015 motion, Hieftje’s defense attorney wrote that Nesbitt’s own investigative report proved that she “testified truthfully,” about driving Buttars’ car. Nevertheless, while the judge admitted to “serious concerns” about the case, she bound it over in August 2015, only for it to be dismissed shortly after. Hieftje declined an interview request. When it came to Nesbitt’s work on the Shurtleff and Swallow cases, Salt Lake County DA Sim Gill says he was initially brought in on the investigation into the late Utah County political operative and Shurtleff friend, Tim Lawson. He wasn’t put on the stand in the Swallow case, Gill says, because it would have been “duplicative” to Isakson. What surprised Davis County attorney Troy Rawlings, who ultimately dismissed charges against Shurtleff, was that Nesbitt was not called to the stand after Isakson had taken such a pummeling. “They rest their case after there were a number of witnesses clearly favorable to the defendant without putting their lead agent on to try and clarify and bolster their case to the jury,” he says. DPS says Nesbitt was ready and willing to take the stand; he just wasn’t called. Nesbitt had been “authorized” by both the DOJ and the FBI to testify for the defense and prosecution. “Nesbitt was in court each day and was not called to testify by either side,” Cotes writes in an email. Tangaro remains deeply skeptical. “As someone who used to prosecute cases, I don’t think I would feel comfortable using Nesbitt as a witness or an investigator in any prosecution,” she says. “And I feel like prosecutorial agencies should know, if they haven’t already been put on notice, of Agent Nesbitt and his tactics.” CW

NEWS Pet Sounds

CITY ORDINANCE

Woman in tug of war with city to get cuddly, loud dogs back.

Gloria Saputo’s dog Suzy, a Shitzu-poodle mix.

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 13

common enough. According to Deann Shepherd, communications director at the Humane Society of Utah, agency investigators received 40 complaints regarding barking dogs in 2016 but were not aware of any that resulted in forfeitures. Shepherd went on to say that incessant barking is commonly a sign that a dog’s needs are not being met. Salt Lake County District Attorney Sim Gill, who oversees the City Attorney’s Office, points to Saputo’s history with animal control as precisely the reason the judge ordered the dogs’ forfeiture. “When they fail [to comply with prior court orders], we follow the process outlined, and if counsel cannot resolve the matter or will not have their client understand it, then making the process available to the continuing complaints from citizens is the only option left,” he says via email. In February, the city slapped Saputo with seven additional charges stemming from another barking incident. Gill notes that the prosecution was predicated on repeated calls to the city from neighbors. “Complaints are generated not by the prosecution but arise out of disturbances within the community, from citizens,” he says. “The laws are on the books to try and pave a path of responsibility. Every effort was made with prior attempts as well as other options provided to resolve the matter.” Smith argues, however, that efforts made by her client to curb the noise were overlooked. After being assigned to the case, she explained the severity of the punishment, and Saputo promptly purchased bark collars and hung a blind in the yard to obscure the dogs’ view from distractions on the street. “I think it’s a misuse of our funding to do an entire jury trial on a case like this,” she says. Jennifer Golembeski, a neighbor who operates a home business and one of the witnesses for the city, says the constant barking tested her sanity. She says she wishes the problem had been resolved prior to the point where it entered a courtroom. “None of us ever wanted it to go this far,” Golembeski says. When talking as neighbors didn’t seem to work, police and animal control got involved. “It kind of spiraled to this point. It never had to go this far.” CW

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rom the onset, the associate public defender expected a quick negotiation. She was wrong, of course. Instead of an open and shut case, attorney Brady Smith says, city lawyers threatened jail time for her client unless she pleaded guilty to the charges at hand. But the defendant, Gloria Saputo, 75, did commit a crime. That’s what a justice court jury determined in February. The offense: Her dogs barked. In fact, they might have been barking all day; Saputo was out on Aug. 4, 2016, the date of the offense, while her late husband stayed at home. Neighbors, fed up with the noise, eventually called the cops. And soon enough the city had a case pending against her. During plea negotiations, the sticking point centered on the requisite forfeiture of the two dogs. Saputo, a Sugar House widow, found the demand unacceptable, and the deal broke off before it even started. Her canines—Lilly, a German shepherd, and Suzy, a Shitzu-poodle mix—are like family, she says. Because the dogs weren’t cited for attacking or acting aggressively, Smith questioned the need to confiscate them. “I haven’t been able to find anything in case law where dogs are forfeited over barking,” she says. “In the cases of animal cruelty or if the dogs are biting people, that’s obviously different. But in this, they actually asked the judge to take the dogs away from her.” She was also surprised that the prosecutor wasn’t willing to reduce the pending misdemeanor charge to an infraction, thereby giving a judge the option of putting Saputo behind bars, if convicted. “Here I am, telling this 74-year-old woman that they’re going to throw her in jail because she has dogs barking,” Smith says. It surely didn’t help Saputo that the Aug. 4 affair wasn’t her first citation. Her dogs garnered complaints on two previous occasions in 2016, which were settled in a global plea in abeyance deal. And in April, Saputo was charged with animal neglect due to Suzy’s matted and unkempt fur. That allegation was resolved after a trip to the groomer. Saputo contested the charges at trial, but lost, and was ordered to relinquish Lilly and Suzy to animal control. She immediately appealed the verdict in district court, where trial is scheduled for mid-April. Judge Elizabeth Hruby-Mills stayed the sentence pending the appeal, meaning Saputo is allowed to have her dogs back for the time being. Had they not been released, Smith is doubtful that Saputo’s two dogs would quiet the neighborhood. Barking dogs, she notes, is

COURTESY PHOTO

BY DYLAN WOOLF HARRIS dwharris@cityweekly.net @DylantheHarris

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14 | MARCH 16, 2017

The Foilies 2017 Wherein we recognize the year’s worst in govt. transparency. By Aaron Mackey Dave Maass & Kate Tummarello | Illustrations by Hugh D’Andrade

thick fog is rolling in over Sunshine Week (March 12-18), the annual event when government transparency advocates raise awareness about the importance of access to public records. We are entering an age when officials at the highest levels seek to discredit critical reporting with “alternative facts,” “fake news” slurs and selective access to press conferences—while making their own claims without providing much in the way to substantiate them. But no matter how much the pundits claim we’re entering a “post-truth” era, it is crucial we defend the idea of proof. Proof is in the bureaucratic paper trails. Proof is in the accounting ledgers, the legal memos, the audits and the police reports. Proof is in the data. When it comes to government actions, that proof is often obtained by leveraging laws like the Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) and state-level public records laws— except when government officials seek to ignore the rules to suppress evidence. At the same time, this is also par for the course. As award-winning investigative reporter Shane Bauer recently posted on Twitter: “I’ve been stonewalled by the government throughout my journalistic career. I’m seriously baffled by people acting like this is brand new.” For the third year, the Electronic Frontier Foundation presents “The Foilies,” our anti-awards identifying the times when access to information has been stymied or when government agencies have responded in the most absurd ways to records requests. Think of it as the Golden Raspberries but for government transparency, where the bad actors are actually going off script to deny the public the right to understand what business is being conducted on their behalf. To compile these awards, EFF solicited nominations from around the country and scoured through news stories and the #FOIAFriday Twitter threads to find the worst, the silliest and the most ridiculous responses to request for public information.

A The ‘Make America Opaque Again’ Award A commitment to public transparency should start at the top. But from the beginning of his campaign, President Trump has instead committed to opacity by refusing to release his tax returns, citing concerns about an ongoing IRS audit. Now that he’s been elected, Trump’s critics, ethics experts and even some allies have called on him to release his tax returns and prove that he has eliminated potential conflicts of interest and sufficiently distanced himself from the businesses in his name that stand to make more money now that he’s in office. But the Trump administration has not changed its stance. No matter where you stand on the political spectrum, the American public should be outraged that we now have the first sitting president since the 1970s to avoid such a baseline transparency tradition.

As journalist Raphael Satter wrote in a letter complaining to the agency: “It appears that PHAC staff botched their attempt to redact the documents, using bits of tape and loose pieces of paper to cover information which they tried to withhold. By the time it came into my hands, much of the tape had worn off and the taped pieces had been torn. Even the wryest transparency advocates were amused when Satter wrote about the redaction art project on Twitter, but the incident did have more serious implications. At least three Sierra Leonean medical patients had their personal information exposed. Lifting up the tape also revealed how the agency redacted information that the reporters believed should’ve been public, such as email signatures. The Office of the Privacy Commissioner of Canada said it would investigate, but Satter says he hasn’t heard anything back for 10 months.

The Hypocrisy Award

The Frogmarch Award

President Donald Trump

Former Indiana Governor—and current Vice President—Mike Pence Vice President Mike Pence cared a lot about transparency and accountability in 2016, especially when it came to email. A campaign appearance couldn’t go by without Pence or his running mate criticizing Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton for using a private email server during her tenure as secretary of state. In fact, the Foilies honored Clinton last year for her homebrewed email approach. But Pence seemed much less bothered by those transparency and accountability concerns when he used a private AOL email address to conduct official business as Indiana’s governor. The Indianapolis Star reported in February that Pence used the account to communicate “with top advisors on topics ranging from security gates at the governor’s residence to the state’s response to terror attacks across the globe.” That means that critical homeland security information was kept in an account likely less secure than government accounts (his account was reportedly hacked, too), and Pence’s communications were shielded from government records requirements.

Town of White Castle, La.

The Arts and Crafts Award

Public Health Agency of Canada Journalists are used to receiving documents covered with cross-outs and huge black boxes. But in May 2016, Associated Press reporters encountered a unique form of redaction from Public Health Agency of Canada when seeking records related to the Ebola outbreak.

The only thing that could’ve made reporter Chris Nakamoto’s public records request in the small town of White Castle, La., a more absurd misadventure is if he’d brought Harold and Kumar along with him. As chief investigator for WBRZ in Baton Rouge, Nakamoto filed records requests regarding the White Castle mayor’s salary. But when he turned up with a camera crew at city hall in March 2016 to demand missing documents, he was escorted out in handcuffs, locked in a holding cell for an hour and charged with a misdemeanor for “remaining after being forbidden.” What’s worse is that Nakamoto was summoned to appear before the “Mayor’s Court,” a judicial proceeding conducted by the very same mayor Nakamoto was investigating. Nakamoto lawyered up and the charges were dropped two months later. “If anything, my arrest showed that if they’ll do that to me, and I have the medium to broadcast and let people know what’s happening to me, think about how they’re treating any citizen in that town,” Nakamoto says.

U.S. Department of Justice

Milwaukee Sheriff David Clarke rose to prominence in 2016 as one of then-presidential candidate Donald Trump’s top surrogates, prone to making inflammatory remarks about the Black Lives Matter movement—such as calling them a hate group and linking them to ISIS. But the press has also been a regular target. Milwaukee Journal Sentinel political watchdog columnist Daniel Bice filed a series of records requests with the sheriff’s office, demanding everything from calendars to details about an NRA-funded trip to Israel to records related to a series of jail deaths. So far, Clarke has been extremely slow to release this information, while being extremely quick to smear the reporter on the sheriff’s official Facebook page. Clarke frequently refers to the publication as the “Urinal Sentinel” and has diagnosed Bice with “Sheriff Clarke Derangement Syndrome.” “I deal with open records requests with local governments and police departments. I do it at the city, county and state level,” Bice says. “He’s by far the worst for responding to public records.” In May 2016, Clarke published a short essay on Facebook titled, “When Journalism Becomes an Obsession.” Clarke claimed that after he rejected Bice’s request for an interview, Bice retaliated with a series of public records requests, ignoring the fact that these requests are both routine and are often reporter’s only recourse when an official refuses to answer questions. “This lazy man’s way of putting together newspaper columns uses tax-paid government employees as pseudo-interns to help him gather information to write stories,” Clarke wrote. Memo to Clarke: Requesting and reviewing public records is tedious and time-consuming, and certainly not the way to score an easy scoop. If anything, ranting on Facebook, then issuing one-sentence news releases about those Facebook posts, are the lazy man’s way of being accountable to your constituents.

A local citizen in Portland, Ore., filed a records request to find out everyone that City Commissioner Amanda Fritz had blocked or muted from her Twitter account. This should’ve been easy. However, Fritz decided to go the long way, scribbling down each and every handle on a sheet of paper. She then rescanned that list in, and sent it back to the requester. The records did show that Fritz had decided to hush accounts that were trying to affect public policy, such as @DoBetterPDX, which focuses on local efforts to help homeless people, and anonymous self-described urban activist @jegjehPDX. Here’s a tip for officials who receive similar requests: All you need to do is go to your “Settings and Privacy” page, select the “Muted accounts” or “Blocked accounts” tab and then click “Export your list.”

America Rising PAC, a conservative opposition research committee, has been filing FOIA requests on a number of issues, usually targeting Democrats. Following Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia’s passing, the PAC sent a FOIA to the Attorney General seeking emails referencing the death. But America Rising never received a response acknowledging the DOJ received the request. That’s because the DOJ sent it to a random federal inmate serving time on child pornography charges. The offender, however, was nice enough to forward the message to the PAC with a note railing against the “malicious incompetence” of the Obama administration.

The Redaction of Interest Award

General Services Administration One of the threads that reporters have tried to unravel through the Trump campaign is how the prolific businessman would separate himself from his financial interests, especially regarding his 30-year contract with the federal government to operate a Trump International Hotel at the location of the federally owned Old Post Office in D.C., a paper airplane’s flight from the White House. BuzzFeed filed a FOIA request with the General Services Administration for a copy of the contract. What they received was a highly redacted document that raised more questions than it answered, including what role Trump’s family plays in the project. “The American taxpayer would have no clue who was getting the lease to the building,” says reporter Aram Roston, who was investigating how Trump failed to uphold promises made when he put in a proposal for the project. “You wouldn’t know who owned this project.” After pushing back, BuzzFeed was able to get certain sections unredacted, including evidence that Trump’s three children—Ivanka, Donald Jr. and Eric—all received a 7.425 percent stake through their LLCs, seemingly without injecting any money of their own.

MARCH 16, 2017 | 15

Portland Commissioner Amanda Fritz

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Milwaukee County Sheriff David Clarke

The Wrong Address Award

The Longhand Award

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The ‘Whoa There, Cowboy’ Award

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16 | MARCH 16, 2017

The Fake News Award

Santa Maria Police Department In 2015, the Santa Maria Police Department in California joined many other agencies in using the online service Nixle to distribute public information in lieu of press releases. The agency told citizens to sign up for “trustworthy information.” Less than a year later, police broke that trust. The Santa Maria Police posted to its Nixle account a report that two individuals had been arrested and deported, which was promptly picked up by the local press. Months later, court documents revealed that it had all been a lie to ostensibly help the individuals—who had been targeted for murder by a rival gang—escape the city. Police were fiercely unapologetic. The agency has yet to remove the offending alert from Nixle or offer any kind of addendum, a direct violation of Nixle’s terms of service, which prohibits the transmission of “fraudulent, deceptive, or misleading communications.”

The Least Productive Beta Testing Award

Federal Bureau of Investigation The FBI spent most of 2016 doing what might be charitably described as beta testing a proprietary online FOIA portal that went live in March. But beta testing is probably a misnomer because it implies that the site actually improved after its initial rollout. The FBI’s year of “beta testing” included initially proposing a requirement that requesters submit a copy of their photo ID before submitting a request via the portal, and also imposed “operating hours“ and limited the number of requests an individual could file per day. Yet, even after the FBI walked back from those proposals, the site appears designed to frustrate the public’s ability to make the premiere federal law enforcement agency more transparent. The portal limits the types of requests that can be filed digitally to people seeking information about themselves or others. Requesters cannot use the site to request information about FBI operations or ac-

tivities, otherwise known as the bread and butter of FOIA requests. Oh, and the portal’s webform is capped at 3,000 characters, so brevity is very much appreciated! Worse, now that the portal is online, the FBI has stopped accepting FOIA requests via email, meaning fax and snail mail are now supposed to be the primary (and frustratingly slow) means of sending requests to the FBI. It almost seems like the FBI is affirmatively trying to make it hard to submit FOIA requests.

The Undermining Openness Award

U.S. Department of Justice Documents released in 2016 in response to a FOIA lawsuit by the Freedom of the Press Foundation show that the U.S. Department of Justice secretly lobbied Congress in 2014 to kill a FOIA reform bill that had passed the U.S. House of Representatives 410-0. But the secret axing of an overwhelmingly popular transparency bill wasn’t even the most odious aspect of DOJ’s behavior. In talking points disclosed via the lawsuit, DOJ strongly opposed codifying a “presumption of openness,” a provision that would assume by default that every government record should be disclosed to the public unless an agency could show that its release could result in foreseeable harm. DOJ’s argument: “The proposed amendment is unacceptably damaging to the proper administration of FOIA and of the government as a whole,” which is bureaucratese for something like, “What unhinged transparency nut came up with this crazy presumption of openness idea anyway?” That would be Obama, whose FOIA guidance on his first day in office back in 2009 was the blueprint for the presumption of openness language included in the bill. Perhaps DOJ thought it had to save Obama from himself. DOJ’s fearmongering won out and the bill died. Two years later, Congress eventually passed a much weaker FOIA reform bill, but it did include the presumption of openness the DOJ had previously fought. We’re still waiting for the “government as a whole” to collapse.

The Stupid Meter Award

Elster Solutions, Landis+Gyr, Ericsson

In May 2016, several smart meter companies sued transparency website MuckRock and one of its users, Phil Mocek, in a failed attempt to permanently remove documents from the website that they claimed contained trade secrets. Some of the companies initially obtained a court order requiring MuckRock to take down public records posted to the site that the City of Seattle had already released to the requester. But in their rush to censor MuckRock and its user, the companies overlooked one small detail: The First Amendment. The Constitution plainly protected MuckRock’s ability to publish public records one of its users lawfully obtained from the City of Seattle, regardless of whether they contained trade secrets. A judge quickly agreed, ruling that the initial order was unconstitutional and allowing the documents to be reposted on MuckRock. The case and several others filed against MuckRock and its user later settled or were dismissed outright. The documents continue to be hosted on MuckRock for all to see. But, uh, great job guys!

The Outrageous Fee Award

Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services

When public agencies get requests for digital data, officials can usually simply submit a query straight to the relevant database. But apparently not in Missouri, where officials must use handcrafted, shade-grown database queries by public records artisans. At least, that’s the only explanation we can come up with for why the Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services estimated that it would take roughly 35,000 hours and $1.5 million to respond to an exceedingly simple request for state birth and death data. Nonprofit Reclaim the Records, whose name pretty

States of Texas and Arizona

Honorable Mention: The Unlimited Data Plan Award

Rep. Jason Chaffetz

Updates to Massachusetts’ public records laws were set to take effect in January 2016, with Secretary of the Commonwealth William Galvin tasked with promulgating new regulations to clear up the vague language of the law. But Galvin didn’t exactly take his duty seriously. Instead he

The Foilies were compiled by EFF Investigative Researcher Dave Maass, Frank Stanton Legal Fellow Aaron Mackey, and Policy Analyst Kate Tummarello. The Electronic Frontier Foundation is a San Francisco-based nonprofit that defends civil liberties at the crossroads of technology and the law. Learn more at eff.org.

The Poor Note-Taker Award

MARCH 16, 2017 | 17

Secretary of the Massachusetts Commonwealth

Rep. Jason Chaffetz, R-Utah, recently went on national TV and suggested that the reason some folks can’t afford health insurance is because they’re blowing their paychecks on new iPhones. Queue another Chaffetz-induced groan heard ‘round the world. Quicker than it takes to whisper “Benghazi,” Chaffetz was deflecting retorts that he was an out-of-touch bully. Chaffetz conflates the prices of insurance and a smartphone as Republicans in Congress are in the process of sorting through a replacement to the Affordable Care Act. Common knowledge that members of Congress are offered a government health care option, The Intercept also dug around a Chaffetz political-action committee’s disclosure forms and found that his $738 phone was paid for with donor dollars. While it’s not illegal for Chaffetz to use such a phone for work-related purposes, when alluding financial sacrifices, he might consider using examples that he’s actually paid for himself. Can you hear him now? (Dylan Woolf Harris)

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Public officials often dehumanize the news media to score cheap points, but can the same ploy work when fighting public records requests? That’s the issue in a very strange case between the IND—a Louisiana media outlet—and a city marshal. After the marshal lost his bid to keep records secret in the trial court, he appealed on the grounds that IND had no right to bring the lawsuit in the first place. The marshal, who faced fines, community service and house arrest for failing to turn over records, argues that Louisiana’s public records law requires that a living, breathing human make a request, not a corporate entity such as IND. Make no mistake: There is no dispute that an actual human filed the request, which sought records relating to a bizarre news conference in which the marshal allegedly used his public office to make baseless allegations against a political opponent. Instead, the dispute centers on a legal formalism of whether IND can sue on its own behalf, rather than suing under the name of the reporter. The marshal’s seemingly ridiculous argument does have some basis in the text of the statute, which defines a requester as a person who is at least 18 years old. That said, it’s an incredibly cynical argument, putting the letter well over the spirit of the law in what appears to be a well-documented effort by the marshal to violate the law and block public access. We hope the learned Louisiana appellate judges see through this blatant attempt to short-circuit the public records law.

BuzzFeed Reporters Chris McDaniel and Tasneem Nashrulla have been on a quest to find out where states like Texas and Arizona are obtaining drugs used in lethal injection, as some pharmaceutical suppliers have decided not to participate in the capital punishment machine. But these states are fighting to keep the names of their new suppliers secret, refusing to release anything identifying the companies in response to BuzzFeed’s FOIA requests. At the crux of the investigation is whether the states attempted to obtain the drugs illegally from India. At least one shipment is currently being detained by the FDA. The reason for transparency is obvious if one looks only at one previously botched purchase the reporters uncovered: Texas had tried to source pentobarbital from an Indian company called Provizer Pharma, run by five 20-year-olds. Indian authorities raided their offices for allegedly selling psychotropic drugs and opioids before the order could be fulfilled.

New Orleans City Marshall

crafted a regulation allowing his office to dodge requirements that public records appeals be handled in a timely fashion. But no regulation could take affect without public hearing. So he went through the motions and dispatched an underling to sit at a table and wait out the public comment—but didn’t keep any kind of record of what was said. A close-up captured by a Boston Institute for Nonprofit Journalism reporter showed a pen lying on a blank pad of paper. Asked by a reporter about the lack of notes, the underling said, “I was just here to conduct this hearing. That’s all I can say.”

The Lethal Redaction Award

The Dehumanization Award

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eloquently sums up its mission, believed that a simple database query combined with copy and paste was all that was needed to fulfill its request. Missouri officials begged to differ, estimating that it would take them the equivalent of a person working around the clock for more than four years to compile the list by hand. Although the fee estimate is not the highest the Foilies has ever seen—that honor goes to the Pentagon for its $660-million estimate in response to a MuckRock user’s FOIA request last year—Missouri’s estimate was outrageous. Stranger still, the agency later revised their estimated costs down to $5,000 without any real explanation. Reclaim the Records tried negotiating further with officials, but to no avail, as officials ultimately said they could not fulfill the request. Reclaim the Records has since filed a lawsuit for the data.

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18 | MARCH 16, 2017

Complete listings online @ cityweekly.net

GRACE MCDONOUGH

SAMANTHA LITTLE

COURTESY OF THE ARTIST

ENTERTAINMENT PICKS, MARCH 16-22, 2017

WARNER BROS. PICTURES

ESSENTIALS

the

FRIDAY 3.17

SATURDAY 3.18

How often do you get a chance to see a genuine Salvador Dalí piece? Or meet someone who knew him? Madame Christine Argillet’s father, Pierre, was Dalí’s publisher and friend for five decades, and she brings a collection of the artist’s original etchings, tapestries and watercolors from her personal collection to Old Towne Gallery in Park City. In addition, Argillet is scheduled to attend the gallery March 17-19. Her stories of spending time around the famed Spanish surrealist are engaging and enlightening. “He worked rapidly, joyfully singing,” she recalls in a phone interview. “Abstract shapes would fill with ideas. People would be surprised—his works were very carefully composed.” Dalí was known for eccentric behavior, and she says her father “followed his most extravagant ideas.” The collection includes works from Dalí’s Suites—a series of images including “Mythologie,” “Les Hippies,” “Goethe’s Faust” (“Marguerite” from the “Faust” series is pictured) and “Poemes Secrets d’Apollinaire” spanning an era from the 1930s to 1970s. The work changed from the highly detailed images of the ’30s through the ’60s, when he sometimes completed a work in 30 minutes. In the ’70s, as his eyesight was failing, some lines were unfinished, but his sense of humor remained intact. “It’s interesting to see how Dalí changes himself,” Argillet notes. Unlike the iconic works everybody knows, these reveal a more delicate, intimate side of Dalí. Argillet notes that it’s also a tribute to her father’s relationship with him, which helped facilitate these pieces: “The alchemy was quite magical.” (Brian Staker) Salvador Dalí: The Argillet Collection @ Old Towne Gallery, 580 Main, Park City, 435-655-3910, through March 22, free, RSVP required, oldtownegallery.com

Six years in the making, the SONDER danceparty/theater experience takes the term “breaking the fourth wall” to a whole new level. Attendees take a self-directed tour of the venue, exploring from room to room as they watch the show unfold. The immersive nature of the production is meant to elicit an introspective response about how we create private and public images of ourselves. Director-choreographer Graham Brown aims to juxtapose public experiences, like partying with your friends, with the more private, intimate experiences we have at home. It’s about the different ways we represent ourselves in different environments. Brown’s research question from the beginning has been, “Do you see yourself in it?” Brown attended interactive theater performances in New York City that inspired the contemporary dance and relatable characters found in SONDER. “I would describe the experience for the audience as a sort of a magical abstract reality,” he says. The production occupies three floors of the open-concept space that is the historic Eagles Hall building, which has mostly sat vacant since it closed as a nightclub. “It’s a dream come true,” Brown says of the venue. “I mean, it’s a building that I have admired and been curious about from the time I moved to Utah 10 years ago.” Tickets are projected to be sold out before the show’s run ends. “Come and bring your friends,” Brown says, “and you’ll all walk out the door at the end of the night with a totally different story, and having had a totally different experience because that’s the design of it.” (Lauren Gutierrez) SONDER @ Eagles Hall, 404 S. West Temple, 801-613-0582, March 17-27, 8 & 10 p.m., $14-$20 pre-sale, $19-25 day of show, sonderslc.com

Get ready to see superheroes, Disney princesses and a whole lot of Jedi on Trax this weekend because the fourth annual Comic Con Fan Xperience is here. If this sentence strikes dread into your heart as you think of the additional riders crowding your commute home, take comfort that this convention is one day shorter than past years. And if you’re a fan of FanX, you can take comfort that tickets for this spring’s nerdy celebration are around 65 percent of the normal cost. But no matter where you stand, FanX is set to showcase dozens of high-profile celebrities like parody songwriter Weird Al Yankovic and actor Verne Troyer. The biggest celebrity draw this year is likely Stan Lee, the legendary comic book writer and former president and chairman of Marvel Comics (also known as that old man in every Marvel movie). His appearance at the con is notable not only because he’s a legend among superhero and comic lovers, but also because this year marks his last tour of the con circuit. The DC movie universe’s Aquaman and upcoming Justice League co-star Jason Momoa (pictured) also represents for the superhero enthusiasts. While all shows and fandoms represented receive hours of paneling and celebrity autograph and photo-op events, one focus of this year’s convention is the now-30-year-old classic film The Princess Bride. In addition to panels featuring guest cast members Wallace Shawn, Cary Elwes and Chris Sarandon, there are smaller fan panels to discuss the film. The Princess Bride also plays in the nearby Gateway Megaplex theater both days of the convention at 9 p.m. (Kylee Ehmann) FanX 2017 @ Salt Palace Convention Center, 100 S. West Temple, 801-953-1967, March 17-18, 10 a.m.-8 p.m., $21.25-$175, saltlakecomiccon.com

Each March, people get excited when they start seeing green—and not just blooming trees and grass when spring arrives. I’m talking about St. Patrick’s Day, when you see kids dressed up in orange beards, elfin ears and green clothing looking Leprechaun-ish. Sounds scary for a person who’s seen the early ’90s movie, but can you resist their cuteness? You can celebrate the holiday with the Hibernian Society of Utah, which puts on the annual St. Patrick’s Day parade in Salt Lake City. The family-friendly event starts at The Gateway, and later moves to the grand ballroom of the Pacific Union Station on the north side of the mall for the Siamsa festival of traditional Irish food, dancing and music. If that’s not enough for you, Acadamh Rince Irish Dancers present An Irish Evening at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center on Friday and Saturday. Not only would you be having fun with Irish music, dancing and stories, but you’d also be helping support the International Rescue Committee in Salt Lake City, which receives all profits from the show. Partying for a good cause? Sign me up! This holiday might be associated with barhopping and binge drinking, but for those who’d rather indulge in Irish culture than Irish whiskey, you can find out what makes us want to celebrate in the first place at one of these events. Don’t forget the green. (Sulaiman Alfadhli) St. Patrick’s Day Parade and Siamsa @ The Gateway, 400 W. 100 South, 801-467-6268, March 18, 10 a.m., free, irishinutah.org An Irish Evening @ Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 801-355-2787, March 17-18, 7 p.m., $8-$13, artsaltlake.org

Salvador Dalí: The Argillet Collection

SONDER

Salt Lake Comic Con FanX

St. Paddy’s Day Celebrations

A&E

DANCE

Motion of the Ocean

The dancers of Black Grace bring Pacific Islander movement to the world. BY KATHERINE PIOLI comments@cityweekly.net

Black Grace

Happy hopping

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of Ieremia’s newest works, addresses the challenges faced by men in his community. “Filtered through a Pacific lens,” explains a company press release, the work plays with the difficult and varied “expectations of what it means to be a ‘real man.’” Black Grace’s infusion of modern movement with a masculine tradition grabs the attention of audiences and critics alike. Even The New York Times, whose critics are often difficult to please, found plenty to enjoy during a Black Grace performance in 2004. “Mr. Ieremia works with a somewhat circumscribed vocabulary, communicating a surprising amount through shifting ranks of dancers,” Jennifer Dunning wrote, “and through bounding, bouncing motion, sudden falls and rises and leaps that have the artless beauty of fish breaking from the water and soaring into the sky.” Black Grace clearly proves that dance—its stories, ideas and modes of expression—is a powerful method of communication and celebration among all nations and all peoples. CW

BLACK GRACE

801-363-0565 | 580 E 300 S

T H E A R T F LO R A L . C O M

MARCH 16, 2017 | 19

Kingsbury Hall 1395 E. Presidents Circle 801-581-7100 Wednesday, March 22 7:30 p.m. $5-$30 tickets.utah.edu

me to come and explore a new avenue, things we didn’t think were open to us because dance was the domain of Europeans and quite wealthy families.” These days, the group is internationally renowned. They received rock star attention in 2004 during their first performance at Jacob’s Pillow, the oldest internationally acclaimed summer dance festival in the United States. Part of what makes Black Grace so consistently popular is though the company has seen some significant changes—welcoming both women and dancers of non-Pacific Islander heritage into the company—the style of movement remains rooted in a masculine and Pacific Island tradition, movement that is often aggressive, expansive and ritualistic in a way not seen in other modern companies. Part of the repertoire the company brings to Salt Lake City this week includes Pati Pati (2009), Mother Mother (2013) and Crying Men (2017). Pati Pati is perhaps the most traditional of these works, a “ritualistic dance” with highly structured hand clapping patterns and group formations (reminiscent of some of the dance spirituals performed by the Alvin Ailey Dance Co.). A purely contemporary piece at first glance, Mother Mother—originally choreographed for a music video for the popular New Zealand pop/dub techno band Fat Freddy’s Drop—surprises the audience by allowing the female performers to enter into a masculine space as they jump with stiff, straight bodies and pound their chests and arms in rhythmic patterns, movements traditionally performed only by men in Pacific dance. Crying Men, one

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

DUNCAN COLE

he dancing hula girl—with her grass skirt, swiveling hips and flowery lei—is likely the image that first comes to mind (and, for many Utahns, the Haka) when considering dance from Pacific Island cultures. After the Black Grace dancers perform at Kingsbury Hall this week, that definition is likely to expand. Black Grace, a contemporary dance company from New Zealand under the artistic direction of founder Neil Ieremia, is certainly well steeped in all the techniques of modern dance. But the group’s life energy and greatest source of inspiration comes from Pacific movement traditions. The company’s unique combination of traditional and modern is changing both what modern dance can be and what Pacific Islander dance is. Ieremia was born in Cannon’s Creek, a working-class factory town on New Zealand’s North Island where the majority of residents, including Ieremia, identify as “Pacific peoples”—those whose ancestors hail from islands like Samoa, Tonga, Fiji and others. Cannon’s Creek was a tough place, Ieremia recalls, and for young men of Samoan decent like himself, expectations and opportunities were limited. During an interview in 2013 with PRI’s The World, he recalled that “in New Zealand, the Pacific Island culture is a minority … We’re normally thought of as unskilled labor, and when you finish high school—if you finish high school—you’re either going to go on welfare or get a job in the local factory.” Ieremia neither went on welfare nor took a factory job. He landed a bank job at the age of 17. Two years later, he quit to accept an invitation to train professionally as a dancer at the Auckland Performing Arts School. When he told his parents he was quitting work to follow his passion, his mother cried, he says, and his father shook his head and walked away. But in many ways, following his dream has paid off. In 1995, following his studies, Ieremia started Black Grace, then an all-male contemporary dance company with strong roots in Samoan dance traditions. “I saw in my community people who were more talented than me who could do a number of things but all ended up in factories on a downward spiral,” Ieremia told CriticalDance in 2015. “I wanted, with Black Grace, to provide a platform for young men like

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20 | MARCH 16, 2017

moreESSENTIALS

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE @ CITYWEEKLY.NET

Paintings by Utah native Brent Godfrey (detail from“Little Monkey” is pictured) are on display in the solo exhibition Observation at “A” Gallery (1321 S. 2100 East, 801-583-4800, agalleryonline.com), March 17-April 22, with artist reception March 17, 6-8 p.m.

PERFORMANCE THEATER

Annie The Ziegfeld Theater, 3934 S. Washington Blvd., Ogden, 855-944-2787, through March 18, 7:30 p.m., theziegfeldtheater.com Catharsis Good Company Theatre, 260 25th St., Ogden, 801-917-4969, March 17-19, 8 p.m., goodcotheatre.com Cutie and The Beast Off Broadway Theatre, 272 Main, 801-355-4628, March 17-April 22, 7:30 p.m., theobt.org How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying Empress Theatre, 9104 S. 2700 West, Magna, 801-347-7373, through March 25, FridaySaturday, 7:30 p.m.; Saturday matinees, 2 p.m., empresstheatre.com Indiana Bones: Raiders of the Wall Mart Desert Star Playhouse, 4861 S. State, Murray, 801-2662600, through March 18, times vary, desertstar.biz

Lucia di Lammermoor Capitol Theater, 500 W. 200 South, 801-355-2787, through March 17, 7:30 p.m.; March 19, 2 p.m., artsaltlake.org Magic Circle Mime, Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 801-355-2787, March 18, artsaltlake.org Mary Poppins CenterPoint Legacy Theatre, 525 N. 400 West, Centerville, 801-298-1302, through March 25, centerpointtheatre.org Peter and the Starcatchers Hale Center Theater, 225 W. 400 North, Orem, 801-226-8600, through April 8, times vary, haletheater.org Save Your Own Skin The Leonardo, 209 E. 500 South, 801-531-9800, March 17-April 1, FridaySaturday, 7:30 p.m., theleonardo.org SONDER Eagles Hall, 404 S. West Temple, 801-613-0582, March 17-27, 8 & 10 p.m., sonderslc.com (see p. 18) Steel Magnolias Heritage Theatre, 2505 S. Highway 89, Perry, 435-723-8392, through March 25, 7:30 p.m., heritagetheatreutah.com

The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, 801-581-7100, March 17, 7 p.m.; March 18, 11 a.m., utahpresents.org A Streetcar Named Desire Grand Theatre, 1575 S. State, 801-957-3322, March 16-April 1, grandtheatrecompany.com

DANCE

An Irish Evening Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 385-468-1010, March 17-18, 7 p.m., artsaltlake.org (see p. 18) Ballet West: Works from Within Eccles Center, 1750 Kearns Blvd., Park City, 435-655-3114, March 18, 7:30 p.m., ecclescenter.org Black Grace Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, 801-518-7100, March 22, 7:30 p.m., utahpresents.org (see p. 19)

CLASSICAL & SYMPHONY

Salt Lake Symphony: Musicians’ Choice Libby Gardner Hall, 1375 E. Presidents Circle, 801-5817100, March 18, 7:30 p.m., saltlakesymphony.org Salty Cricket: The Triumvirate Urban Arts Gallery, 137 S. Rio Grande St., March 16, 7:30 p.m. saltycricket.org American West Symphony: Pictures at an Exhibition Mount Jordan Middle School, 9351 S. 300 East, Sandy, 801-523-7084, March 18, 7:30 p.m.; Congregation Kol Ami, 2425 E. Heritage Way, Salt Lake City, 801-523-7084, March 19, 7:30 p.m., americanwestsymphony.com

COMEDY & IMPROV

Christian Pieper Wiseguys, 269 Historic 25th St., Ogden, 801-622-5588, March 17-18, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Laughing Stock Improv The Off Broadway Theatre, 272 S. Main, 801-355-4628, Fridays & Saturdays, 10 p.m., laughingstock.us

Quick Wits Comedy 695 W. Center St., Midvale, 801-824-0523, Saturdays, 10 p.m., qwcomedy.com Sarah Tiana Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, 801-532-5233, March 17-18, 7 p.m. & 9:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Shane Mauss Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, 801-532-5233, March 16, 7:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com

LITERATURE AUTHOR APPEARANCES

Climate Change Author Event: Daniel Bedford and John Cook St. Joseph High School, 1790 Lake St., Ogden, March 16, 7 p.m., stjosephutah.com Peter Heller: Celine The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, 801-484-9100, March 16, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com Maryann Martinsen: Beyond the Savanna Weller Book Works, 607 Trolley Square, 801-3282586, March 17, 7 p.m., wellerbookworks.com Gigi Priebe: The Adventures of Henry Whiskers The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, 801-484-9100, March 18, 11 a.m., kingsenglish.com

SPECIAL EVENTS TALKS & LECTURES

World Affairs Lecture Series: Kathy Laurini Westminster College Jewett Center for the Performing Arts, 1840 S. 1300 East, March 21, 7 p.m., utahdiplomacy.org Water, Community and the Culture of Owning Quinney College of Law, 383 S. University St., University of Utah, March 22, 12:30 p.m., law.utah.edu

See Greece like a local..... september 15 - 25 Price: $1350* th

(per person, based on double occupancy)

4 Nights in Athens, 5 Nights in Crete INCLUDES: PRE-TRIP SLC GREEK DINNER @ ARISTO’S TRANSFER FROM ATHENS AIRPORT (AT SELECT TIMES ONLY) WELCOME DINNER IN ATHENS BREAKFAST DAILY IN ATHENS AND CRETE HOTELS UNIQUE FOODS AND BACK ALLEY TOUR OF ATHENS ATHENS HOTEL/PORT TRANSFERS OVERNIGHT FERRY TO CRETE BUS FROM HERAKLION, CRETE TO CHANIA, CRETE WALKING TOUR CHANIA, CRETE OPTIONAL DAY TRIPS (ADD ONS) AEGINA, POROS AND HYDRA 3 ISLAND TOUR MAGNIFICENT DELPHI EPIDAVROS AND CORINTH ...AND MORE

Tour Greece with someone who speaks the language and knows what to see! EMAIL JBRIGGS@CITYWEEKLY.NET FOR TRIP DETAILS Limited spots available. *Triple and single occupancy rates available *Airfare not included, **does not include historic sites or museum fees

FESTIVALS & MARKETS

Salt Lake Comic Con FanX Salt Palace Convention Center, 100 S. West Temple, 801-9531967, March 17-18, saltlakecomiccon.com (see p. 18) Winter Market Rio Grande Depot, 300 S. Rio Grande St., through April 22, Saturdays, 10 a.m.2 p.m., slcfarmersmarket.org

ST. PATRICK’S DAY EVENTS

4th West Fest Mountain West Hard Cider, 425 N. 400 West, 801-935-4147, Saturday, March 18, noon-5 p.m., facebook.com/mountainwesthardcider Hibernian Society of Utah St. Patrick’s Day Parade & Siamsa Gateway Mall, 90 S. 400 West, March 18, 10 a.m.-3 p.m., irishinutah.org (see p. 18) Lucky 13 Half Marathon, 10K & 5K Gardner Village, 1100 W. 7800 South, March 18, 8:30 a.m.-noon, lucky13race.com Saint Patrick’s Day Party Snowbasin Ski Resort, 3925 E Snowbasin Road, Huntsville, 888-437-5488, Friday-Saturday, March 17-18, 2 p.m., snowbasin.com

VISUAL ART GALLERIES & MUSEUMS

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Adrian Bangerter: Reflections Art at the Main, 210 E. 400 South, 801-363-4088, through April 14, artatthemain.com Brent Godfrey: Observation A Gallery, 1321 S. 2100 East, 801-583-4800, March 17-April 22, 10 a.m., agalleryonline.com (see p. 20) Christopher Boffoli: Food for Thought Kimball Art Center, 1401 Kearns Blvd., Park City, 435-6498882, through March 19, kimballartcenter.org Collect Alice Gallery, 617 E. South Temple, 801274-7270, through March 20, heritage.utah.gov Ed Napia, Rad Cuch & Wahid Migoli Art Access Gallery, 230 S. 500 West, Ste. 125, 801-328-0703, March 17-April 14, accessart.org Focus: Photography by Jessica Hernandez Sprague Library, 280 W. 500 North, 801-5948680, through April 14, slcpl.org From the Heart: Expressions in Fiber Utah Cultural Celebration Center, 1355 W. 3100 South, West Valley City, 801-965-5100, through April 26, culturalcelebration.org The Future Isn’t What It Used to Be Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through May 13, free, utahmoca.org Gallery Stroll Utah Folk Arts Museum, 1150 S. Constitution Drive, March 17, 6-9 p.m., heritage.utah.gov

Groundbreaking: Innovations in Clay Kimball Art Center, 1401 Kearns Blvd., Park City, 435649-8882, through April 16, kimballartcenter.org The Illusion Underneath: Paintings by Michael Silva Day-Riverside Library, 1575 W 1000 North, 801-594-8632, through March 25, slcpl.org Imagining Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through April 15, utahmoca.org Isaac Hastings: Inevitably Inert God Hates Robots, 314 W. 300 South, March 17-April 7, godhatesrobots.com Janiece Murray: Eight Fold Anderson Foothill Library, 1135 S. 2100 East, 801-594-8611, through March 18, slcpl.org/events Justin Chouinard: These Ribbons Are Substratum UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, 801328-4201, March 17-April 22, 10 a.m., utahmoca.org Let Paint Be Paint: Paintings by Rod Heiss Salt Lake City Chapman Library, 577 S. 900 West, 801594-8623, through April 27, slcpl.org Liberty Blake: Paper Collage Phillips Gallery, 444 E. 200 South, 801-364-8284, March 17-April 14, phillips-gallery.com Lindsay Daniels: Nepal Rises Sprague Library, 2131 S. 1100 East, 801-594-8640, through March 18, slcpl.org Michael Workman: Helper Paintings David Ericson Fine Art, 418 S. 200 West, 801-533-8245, March 17-April 14, davidericson-fineart.com Off the Map Art Access Gallery, 230 S. 500 West, Ste. 125, 801-328-0703, March 17-April 14, accessart.org Only God Can Judge Me Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, 801-3284201, through March 18, utahmoca.org Rona Pondick & Robert Feintuch: Heads, hands, feet; sleeping, holding, dreaming, dying Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through July 15, utahmoca.org Salvador Dalí: The Argillet Collection Old Towne Gallery, 580 Main, Park City, 435-655-3910, March 17-19, oldtownegallery.com (see p. 18) Sleeping Giants + Untold Tales: Paintings by Matt Monsoon Gallery at Library Square, 210 E. 400 South, 801-524-8200, through April 14, slcpl.org Utah At War Salt Lake City Public Library, 210 E. 400 South, 801-524-8200, March 20-April 22, 9 a.m-6 p.m., slcpl.org Women in Art Urban Arts Gallery, 137 S. Rio Grande St., 801-230-0820, through April 2, urbanartsgallery.org

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 21

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DINE JOHN TAYLOR

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Raising the Bar

BEST REUBEN

Munch on these local eats while you wet your whistle. BY TED SCHEFFLER tscheffler@cityweekly.net @critic1

BEST SAUSAGES

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here was a time not all that long ago when bar snacks usually consisted of items such as stale pretzels, pickled eggs and Corn Nuts. The most one could wish for was greasy chicken wings or soggy fish and chips. But I’m happy to report that those days are long gone. With very little effort, you can now feast like a gourmand and enjoy your favorite craft cocktail, to boot. I’ve previously sung the praises of the topflight crew of bartenders at Water Witch (163 W. 900 South, SLC, 801-462-0967, waterwitchbar.com), along with their Caputo’s-curated bar bites. Here are a few more watering holes that are steadily raising the bar, food-wise. Since BTG Wine Bar (63 W. 100 South, SLC, 801-359-2814, btgwinebar.com) is adjacent to Caffé Molise and shares the same owner and kitchen, the food there is anything but routine. A range of bruschettas and antipasti are certainly tempting, but don’t pass up the extraordinary eggplant meatballs ($4.95) bathed in a silky tomato and shallot cream sauce. With bar manager extraordinaire Amy Eldredge at the helm of Under Current (279 S. 300 East, SLC, 801-574-2556, undercurrentbar.com), this bar’s libations are second to none. But, that’s also true of their “Food-Bites,” which range from fresh oysters on the half-shell ($2.75 each) and a killer lobster roll slider with brown butter aioli ($12), to the seafood lover’s Fruits de Mer platter brimming with oysters, shrimp, ceviche and lobster ($51). Ogden’s Title 32B Lounge at Hearth on 25th (195 25th St., Ogden, 801-399-0088, hearth25.com) is rightly known for its craft ice program and distinctive cocktails like the Giggle Water, a festive and fizzy libation of Banfi Rosa Regale sparkling rosé with crème de cassis, black currant shrub and rock sugar. For my money, the downto-earth wood-oven-roasted bone marrow ($15) is pretty much the ultimate bar bite. Ditto the crazy-good coconut-curry popcorn ($5). Whiskey Street (323 S. Main, SLC, 801433-1371, whiskeystreet.com) might be well known as one of SLC’s most hip urban bars, but it ought to be equally known for its kitchen. Chef Matt Crandall’s talents take bar snacks to new levels with options like pork belly corn dogs ($14), short rib polenta poutine ($14), hazelnut-dusted

calamari with chipotle aioli ($11) Wood-oven-roasted bone marrow from Ogden’s and the unforgettable deviled eggs Title 32B Lounge at Hearth on 25th seasoned with minced chives, pickled mustard seed, bourbon-smoked paprika, pimento cheese and friendly staff and rockin’ barbecue, Moab’s double-smoked bacon ($8). Blu Bar (811 S. Main, Moab, 435-259-3333, In Park City, the Boneyard Saloon & blupigbbq.com) is easy to love. Order up a Wine Dive (1251 Kearns Blvd., Park City, $5 Moscow mule or a $7 Long Island iced 435-649-0911, boneyardsaloon.com) is a tea and enjoy jumbo smoked chicken wings sort of adult theme park where the Mick for a mere 50 cents each. The crispy batJagger quote, “Too much is never enough,” tered green beans with ancho-chile mayo applies. Leave your inhibitions at home. I ($8.95) are yummy, as is the pulled pork might have dissed pretzels earlier, but the burger ($11.95), a half-pound beef burger Amish Friendship Pretzel with sweet coun- topped with house-smoked pulled pork try mustard and housemade pickles ($8) and slaw. here is a whole other story. The wagyu beef The speakeasy vibe of underground sliders ($15) with fig compote, cambozola, Bourbon House (19 E. 200 South, SLC, bibb lettuce and—say it with me—bacon 801-746-1005, bourbonhouseslc.com) aioli are stupendous. makes it feel like you’re in on a secret. Well, At Sundance Resort’s Owl Bar (8841 here’s another one: The food menu has been N. Alpine Loop Road, Sundance, 801-223- rethought and reworked and now ranges 4222, sundanceresort.com), the clas- from small plates like deviled eggs ($5) and sic beef chili ($9) is a dependable winter truffled popcorn ($3) with Pecorino Rowarmer when bellied up to the antique mano, to flatbread pizzas, sandwiches and rosewood bar and listening to the live mu- full meals such as roasted chicken ($14), sic lineup. But we need our veggies, too, shrimp and grits ($15) and carnitas tacos right? Thankfully, we can convince our- ($14). Oh, yes, there’s bourbon here, too. selves that the fried Brussels sprouts with Finally, there’s much more to Beer tamari glaze, white balsamic vinegar and Bar (161 E. 200 South, SLC, 801-355-3618, roasted peanuts ($10) is healthy, just like beerbarslc.com) than just beer. The conthe fried pickles with chipotle aioli ($7). joined Bar X (155 E. 200 South, SLC, 801Top-notch mixologists and specialty 355-2287) offers also a vast selection of cocktails—such as the Gossip Girl, Slow wine, cocktails and spirits (how many taFerrari and Wrought Iron—seduce visitors phouses also serve both green and yellow at Copper Common (111 E. 300 South, SLC, Chartreuse?), plus food from purveyors like 801-355-0543, coppercommon.com), but so Vosen’s Bakery, Salt & Smoke Meats and does the elevated bar food. How many bars Eva’s Bakery. The focal point here is the ardo you know that offer beet salad with feta, tisan sausages made by meat master Frody pumpkin seeds and sherry-shallot vinai- Volgger in flavors like Mediterranean turgrette ($8)? Or, for something a little more key, buffalo chipotle, elk bratwurst, picandecadent, pig lovers will exalt in the house- te Italian, curry bratwurst and others. Add made chicharrones ($4) with spicy mayo gourmet dipping sauces like sambal aioli, and the pork belly steam buns with herb tzatziki and curry-ketchup, plus outstandsalad ($8). ing Belgian-style frites, and you’ve got the With live music, karaoke, cheap drinks, bodacious Beer Bar. CW

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L U N C H • D I N N E R • C O C K TA I L S 1 8 M A R K E T S T R E E T • 8 0 1. 5 1 9 . 9 5 9 5

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Contemporary Japanese Dining

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24 | MARCH 16, 2017

FOOD MATTERS BY TED SCHEFFLER @critic1

NIKI CHAN

Tamale de Elote

Alamexo Jr. Expand your perspective

Broaden your vision

Let your palate roam

60 East 800 South, Salt Lake City, UT (385) 528-3675 www.theeklektik.com

Alamexo’s chef Matthew Lake spreads his south-of-the-border love this spring by opening Alamexo Cantina in early May at 1059 E. 900 South (alamexo.com). Lake is taking his expertise in regional Mexican cuisine and serving it up family-style at his new, casual cantina. I recently got to sample some delicious dishes from the menu including tlaycoyo con queso, porkand-duck meatballs called albondigas de puerco y pato and pollo y pipian verde.

Taste Utah TV

The Utah Restaurant Association has partnered with the Park City Area Restaurant Association to shoot 12 new episodes of Taste Utah. According to a recent press release, “Each 4-6-minute episode follows hosts Katy Sine and Jami Larson to select restaurants where the duo interviews owners and executive chefs. The result is an insider’s view on the history and vision of the establishment, along with behind-the-scenes tours and cooking tips for signature dishes from the kitchen.” The episodes air Saturdays in March and April at 9 a.m. on Fox13, and are available anytime on tasteut.com. Some of the featured restaurants include Tupelo, Shabu, Glitretind, The Farm, Silver Star Café, Yuki Yama, Red Rock Brewing, The Brass Tag and Riverhorse on Main.

Award Winning Donuts

RSL + Uinta

Got beer and (soccer) balls? Uinta Brewing Co. has entered into a partnership agreement with Real Salt Lake to become the team’s official craft-beer sponsor. Via a press release, RSL Chief Business Officer Andy Carroll said, “RSL is excited to welcome Uinta’s wide-ranging line of award-winning craft beers—brewed right here in our home state—to Rio Tinto Stadium to enhance our fans’ gameday experience for both RSL and the Monarchs. Uinta Brewing Co.’s commitment to community interaction and environmental conservation meshes well with the outlook of our fan base, many of whom will certainly be excited by various functions we will host in conjunction with Uinta.” Uinta CEO Steve Mills added, “Entering a partnership with Real is a natural extension of our loyalty to our home state.” The Uinta/Real partnership kicked off with the March 4 season opener. Score! Quote of the week: “So how as a nation can we sit around and eat Mexican food, and drink beer and make friends? That’s the question. If we can do that on a broader scale, I think we’ll come out of it all right.” —Sandra Day O’Connor Send tips to: tscheffler@cityweekly.net

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Bitters in the Beehive

Artisan bitters elevate Utah cocktails. BY TED SCHEFFLER tscheffler@cityweekly.net @critic1

products,” which means that they can be purchased in supermarkets and other nonliquor retail shops. Most bitters are made primarily with alcohol and water, and flavored with botanicals that range from orange peel and cassia to hibiscus, gentian and beyond. Although booze historians trace the earliest bitters back to the ancient Egyptians, its more recent history seems to begin with the Brits in the 19th century, who mixed medicinal herbal bitters into their Canary wine. The world’s most well-known bitters—Angostura—were created in 1824 in Angostura, Venezuela, by German physician Johann Gottlieb Benjamin Siegert. Around the same time (ca. 1830), Peychaud’s bitters was founded in New Orleans by Creole apothecary Antoine Amédée Peychaud. It’s now produced in Kentucky, while Angostura comes from Trinidad and Tobago. Closer to home, Mike D’Amico founded Roy-based Beehive Bitters Co. (beehivebitters.com) in 2015 when he and his family and friends noted a lack of quality local bitters. It’s a truly artisan outfit, run and operated by D’Amico himself, with hand labeling on each bottle containing batch and bottle numbers. Retailing for $13.50 per 1-ounce bottle, Beehive’s lineup includes coffee & cacao, spiced orange, lime and lemon bitters. D’Amicio also sells bitters gift sets, three- and five-packs, and seasonal bourbon barrel-aged caramelized orange bitters

DRINK

($27.95 for 5 ounces). The latter is an excellent addition to a Manhattan, with notes of orange peel, vanilla from Sugar House Distillery whiskey barrels and appealing spice aromas. Salt Lake City’s Bitters Lab (bitterslab.com) was also launched in 2015 by Andrea Latimer and Jesse Coss. Before founding Bitters Lab, Latimer created Bittersweet to help introduce Utahns to culinary bitters used in dessert and for making “mocktails.” The Farmers Market-based experiment would soon lead to Bitters Lab, where the couple currently produces six varieties: aromatic; charred cedar and currant; apricot vanilla; habanero lime; seasonal apple ginger; and fig and black walnut—the last two are available in autumn and winter, respectively. They come in attractive 4-ounce bottles with a modern BL logo, priced at $20 apiece. Fans of barrel-aged whiskey will

take kindly to the charred cedar and currant bitters with woodsy, smoky notes balanced by subtle sweetness from black currants. The habanero lime flavor is a natural for margaritas and other tequila and mezcal drinks. It’s too lengthy to get into here, but for a fun read, visit honestjohnbitters.com, the Honest John Bitters Co. website, for the entertaining story by writer Darby Doyle recounting the history of fictional Honest John. The real founders of Utah’s newest craft bitters company are Sara Lund and Brandon Cagle of SLC’s Bodega and The Rest. Priced at $24 per 4-ounce bottle, or $10 for a half-ounce, Honest John flavors currently include aromatic, NOLA, orange, black walnut and grapefruit. The aromatic bitters is a high-quality substitute for Peychaud’s or Angostura in an old fashioned, and the black walnut combines dark flavors of cacao and black walnuts with sweet maple and allspice notes. Find Honest John at The Rest, Caputo’s and online. CW

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

ot all that long ago, most Utah bars would have a lonely bottle of Angostura bitters behind the bar. Or, if you were lucky, maybe some Peychaud’s. But with the craft cocktail renaissance that has emerged in America during the past few years, an industry of high-quality artisan bitters has grown along with it—even in Utah. What are bitters? Cocktail bitters—as opposed to “digestive bitters” such as Campari, Fernet Branca, Aperol, Jägermeister and Jeppson’s—are used in small amounts (usually drops) to flavor cocktails. A little bit goes a long way, which is why artisan bitters are commonly sold in tiny eyedroppersize bottles. Although they contain alcohol, they’re considered “alcoholic non-beverage

BEER, WINE & SPIRITS

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Featuring dining destinations from buffets and rooms with a view to mom-and-pop joints, chic cuisine and some of our dining critic’s faves.

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26 | MARCH 16, 2017

Pasta for the People since 1968

Hot Dynasty

AWARD WINNING INDIAN CUISINE

Hidden away in the Chinatown Supermarket building, Hot Dynasty is upscale in appearance but not in price. With nearly 250 dishes to choose from, it’s hard to know where to begin, so here are some suggestions: Start with pan-fried dumplings, steamed mini pork buns or perhaps a noodle dish. The Sichuan cold noodles, thicker lo mein-type egg noodles served cold with a deliciously spicy peanut sesame sauce, is an excellent option. 3390 S. State, Salt Lake City, 801-809-3229, hotdynasty.com

Jersey Mike’s Subs

Since 1956, this New Jersey-based sandwich shop has been making gourmet wraps as well as hot and cold subs for its loyal customers. If you are looking for a hot and steamy type of sub, try their authentic Philly cheesesteak. As far as cold subs go, you can’t go wrong with Jersey Shore’s Favorite—provolone, ham and capocollo. Jersey Mike’s offers catering services as well. Multiple locations, jerseymikes.com INDIAPALACEUTAH.COM 1086 WEST SOUTH JORDAN PARKWAY (10500 S.) #111 | 801.302.0777

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GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net

Lucky 13

Ask any Salt Lake City native where the best burger in town is, and they’ll probably say Lucky 13 without batting an eye. Situated across the street from Smith’s Ballpark, the bar and grill is always bustling when the Salt Lake Bees are playing, and the open patio out front fills up quick in the warmer months. Favorite burgers include the Bacon Stinky Cheeseburger dished up with melted Stella blue cheese, as well as the Ol’ Man Burger—a creation not for the faint of heart, as it’s loaded with roasted jalapeños. 135 W. 1300 South, Salt Lake City, 801-487-4418, lucky13slc.com

italianvillageslc.com

5370 S. 900 E. / 801.266.4182 M ON-T HU 11a-11p / FR I -SA T 11a-12a / SU N 3p-10p

STORE

Ocean City

Ocean City is your one-stop shop for fresh seafood, Asian food products and authentic international ingredients. Everything in the market is natural and imported from hard-to-reach corners of the earth. The seafood market imports spices that are necessary for Asian cooking but rarely found in SLC. They also carry a selection of imported teas and baked treats. 872 S. State, Salt Lake City, 801-953-1916, freshseafoodmarketinsaltlakeut.com

★★★★★

Pleiku D I N I N G · B E S T O F U TA H · N I G H T L I F E A C T I V I T I E S · W E L L N E S S · S E R V I C E S H O T E L S & T R AV E L · R E C R E AT I O N · R E TA I L · T I C k E T S W/ L O W O R N O F E E S

cityweeklystore.com

Pleiku, named after the capital of Gia Lai Province in central Vietnam, is located downtown on Main Street, in the space that formerly homed Cindy Lee Café. The ambiance and décor are ultra modern and chic, with molded plastic chairs and a wall-length banquet, mostly done in white and cream tones. As far as the Asian fare goes, there is a tasty tapa that made the trip from Pipa to Pleiku: Shaken Steak Cubes. These are cubes of marinated and grilled crispy boneless sirloin beef served with veggie accompaniments like cucumber, greens, onions and cilantro. 264 S. Main, Salt Lake City, 801-359-4544

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REVIEW BITES

The

A sampler of Ted Scheffler’s reviews

Chakra Lounge and Bar

Indian Style Tapas

From the Creators of The Himalayan Kitchen Next to Himalayan Kitchen

ChakraLounge.net 364 S State St. Salt Lake City

Ikigai

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The Japanese concept of ikigai has to do with purpose and meaning, not unlike the French “raison d’être”; owner Johnny Kwon’s desire to bring meaning to his business led him to close Naked Fish and open this new restaurant. Should there be a wait, settle into a comfortable seat in the lobby and snack on hotate chips: scrumptious housemade rice crackers, each with a couple dollops of dried, cured scallop transformed into an airy, delicious mousse-like consistency, garnished with minced scallion. The cold amberjack dish utilizes the Japanese method of aging/curing fish for 2-4 days, and is cut into artful pieces and served raw with subtle garnishes of puréed pickled plum, candied pistachio crumbs and mitsuba leaves. The agedashi is the best rendition of tofu I have ever tried—lightly fried with the most delicate, crisp exterior and a creamy, soft interior, served in a bowl with dashi broth. A special of grilled Japanese snapper head was seasoned, roasted and grilled while being sprayed with sake, served with scallion shreds and pickled radish. Finish with the light, fluffy Japanese “cheesecake” that’s like eating clouds sprinkled with ginger beer ice pebbles, crumbled spiced cocoa and burnt honey. Reviewed Feb. 23. 67 W. 100 South, 801-595-8888, facebook.com/ikigaislc

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timmy the teeth

MARCH 16, 2017 | 27

-Creekside Patio -87 Years and Going Strong -Breakfast served daily until 4pm -Delicious Mimosas & Bloody Marys -Gift Cards for sale in diner or online

grey on blues

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BRING THE FAMILY UP EMIGRATION CANYON THIS WINTER

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Serving American Comfort Food Since 1930

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28 | MARCH 16, 2017

FILM REVIEW

Beast Intentions

CINEMA

A new Beauty and the Beast can’t decide whether to aim for originality or nostalgia.

WALT DISNEY PICTURES

BY SCOTT RENSHAW scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

ver the past 25-plus years, it is likely that I’ve watched Disney’s animated Beauty and the Beast somewhere in the neighborhood of 75 times. There has been at least one common element to every one of those viewings: Without fail, the moment the first piano notes of the title song begin, my eyes fill with tears. The ballroom dance between Belle and the beast, accompanied by Angela Lansbury’s performance of a tale as old as time, ranks among the greatest emotional achievements in the history of cinema. I’m getting a little misty just sitting here and writing about it. The new mostly live-action adaptation of Beauty and the Beast includes an analogous scene—and I’d be lying my ass off if I didn’t admit that this one scene is 90 percent of the reason this new movie pissed me off. Because somewhere along the line, the Disney company and this creative team had a choice to make: Either they could take a chance on doing something new and inventive with the material, the way Pete’s Dragon did last year, or they could cling to nostalgia for a beloved classic that they couldn’t possibly improve upon. Instead, they did both, which effectively means they did neither, and failed at both. There’s certainly no radical shift to the basic plot, which once again finds bookish Belle (Emma Watson) living in a quiet French village with every day like the one before, etc. Familiar songs guide us through her journey to rescue her father (Kevin Kline) from the castle of the prince who has been transformed into a beast (Dan Stevens), with the castle staff transformed into crockery and knickknacks and furniture and so forth. And mucking up the need for Belle and the beast to fall in love before his 21st birthday, lest the curse last

forever, is the egotistical Gaston (Luke Evans) and his manservant LeFou (Josh Gad), who apparently is gay but that’s a whole thing and best not even to get into it. Director Bill Condon (Dreamgirls) and screenwriters Evan Spiliotopoulos (numerous direct-to-video Disney sequels) and Stephen Chbosky (The Perks of Being a Wallflower) do make an effort at giving this Beauty and the Beast a significantly different tone. Part of that shift involves emphasizing more of the back-story of both of the main characters and how they were shaped by losing their mothers, which at least erases the weird dynamic from the original movie that had the prince cursed for being too shallow and selfish when he was only 11 years old. This more melancholy sensibility makes the casting of Watson slightly more understandable, but her introspective intelligence still undercuts the idea that the vivacious, boundlessly adventurous Belle brings the beast out of his shell. Instead, they’re more like two vaguely depressed souls who might kind of “get” one another. That serious-minded approach—mixed with the considerably creepier quality of Mrs. Potts (Emma Thompson), Lumiere (Ewan McGregor), Cogsworth (Ian McKellen) and company in CGI form—could have been an interesting, risky way to break free from the classic source. It might have been possible to think of it more like the film adaptation of the Broadway musical, rather than a live-action version of the animated film, although it’s weird that the stage

Dan Stevens and Emma Watson in Beauty and the Beast

version’s new songs are all ditched in favor of three brand-new (and not at all memorable) Alan Menken/Tim Rice compositions. But then we have that ballroom sequence, and that’s where the pretense falls apart. Everything about it feels stolen from the original: the color scheme of the two characters’ costumes; the choreography of their dance; Thompson’s effort to duplicate Lansbury’s iconic vocals; even the swooping camera moves into and out of the ballroom’s chandeliers. The stuff that works about this movie—Evans’ preening Gaston, bouncy choreography, a wonderfully expressive CGI design for the beast’s face— gets lost in its attempts to capitalize on a wistful romanticism that this story hasn’t earned. It’s not really a kid-friendly movie; it’s a movie that wants to be taken seriously, while abandoning almost all of the joy that made the original an actual kidfriendly movie. This ballroom sequence, like the one in the original, also made me want to weep. Just not for any of the right reasons. CW

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

BB Emma Watson Dan Stevens Luke Evans Rated PG

TRY THESE Beauty and the Beast (1991) Paige O’Hara Robby Benson Rated G

Dreamgirls (2006) Beyoncé Knowles Jennifer Hudson Rated PG-13

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012) Logan Lerman Emma Watson Rated PG-13

Pete’s Dragon (2016) Bryce Dallas Howard Oakes Fegley Rated PG

CINEMA CLIPS

MOVIE TIMES AND LOCATIONS AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

NEW THIS WEEK

Information is correct at press time. Film release schedules are subject to change. BEAUTY AND THE BEAST BB See review p. 28. Opens March 17 at theaters valleywide. (PG) THE BELKO EXPERIMENT [not yet reviewed] Workers in an office building find themselves trapped and forced to make harrowing moral choices in order to survive. Opens March 17 at theaters valleywide. (R)

MY LIFE AS A ZUCCHINI BBBB Sallow faces and shadowed eyes on oversized heads, tragedy and pain made bloatedly manifest on little clay bodies: This Best Animated Feature Oscar nominee is not an easy film, but it is an instantly captivating one. Sweet 9-year-old Zucchini goes to live in an orphanage after the sudden death of his mother. It’s a nice place, but is full of children weighed down by grief, which has turned them bullying or neurotic or withdrawn or just plain sad. Still, Zucchini is building a new life for himself, making new friends and finding a mentor in a kindly police officer (the voice of Nick Offerman). This is a lovely film, using haunting animation to tell a tale of the unexpected turns life can take and the deeper understanding of our fellow humans that misfortune can grant us. The death of Zucchini’s mother might have little ones upset, and the ideas the film confronts revolve around harsh realities of real children’s lives, but nothing graphic is depicted, and it all occurs on a level that grade-schoolers should have no trouble appreciating. Opens March 17 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (PG-13)—MaryAnn Johanson

SPECIAL SCREENINGS

THE SENSE OF AN ENDING BB.5 It’s nice to see Jim Broadbent in a starring role, and his warm presence is a boon to this wispy, high-minded drama. But our favorite befuddled British dad deserves a meatier character than Tony Webster, a retired Londoner whose comfortable life is mildly disrupted when the mother of an ex-girlfriend from his university days bequeaths to him a diary that the ex-girlfriend (played as an adult by Charlotte Rampling) refuses to hand over. There follows much introspection and flashing back to when young Tony (Billy Howle), the girlfriend (Freya Mavor) and his best mate Adrian (Joe Alwyn) palled around. Directed by Ritesh Batra and faithfully adapted from Julian Barnes’ novel, the film is too staid for anything like “shocking” revelations, but Tony does come to realize a few things he didn’t

THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES At SLC Main Library, March 22, 2 p.m. (NR) KOYAANISQATSI At Utah Museum of Fine Art, March 22, 7 p.m. (NR) PATERSON At Park City Film Series, March 17-18, 8 p.m.; March 19, 6 p.m. (R) REAL BOY At SLC Main Library, March 16, 7 p.m. (NR) STEP At SLC Main Library, March 21, 7 p.m. (NR)

CURRENT RELEASES KONG: SKULL ISLAND BBB.5 Boiled down to its bonkers essence, this 1973-set story a Vietnam movie with monsters: Ape-ocalypse Now, with a war-addicted, possibly insane soldier (Samuel L. Jackson) going full Ahab and fixating on Kong as a war he can win. Jackson and his team escort a scientific expedition (including tracker Tom Hiddleston and photojournalist Brie Larson) to the newly discovered island, where the skyscrapersized simian awaits. The mix of horror, black comedy and monster battles works, even crammed in like this, thanks in large part to the terrific cast treating it with just enough seriousness under the lashings of nonsense; Reilly steals the show as a castaway pilot. And the most offensive Kong tropes have been excised, though they are alluded to. I’d have said, after Peter Jackson’s Kong, that he didn’t need another reboot. But I’m glad we got this one. (PG-13)—MAJ

MONDAY 20TH

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 29

BLAZING SADDLES (1974)

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FILM • FOOD • NEIGHBORHOOD BAR SHOWING: MARCH 17TH - MARCH 23RD

more than just movies at brewvies

THE LURE BB In general, my response to the prospect of a musical/horror/fantasy about generally topless mermaid sisters would be something along the lines of “Bring it!” But director Agnieszka Smoczynska’s tale—following the adventures of sirens Golden (Michalina Olszanska) and Silver (Marta Mazurek) as they venture onto land in Poland and join a family musical act—is such a baffling tossed salad of elements that it rarely works as any of them. The script by Robert Bolesto tries to create a unique mythology about the creatures as dangerous, asexual hunters with love as one of their few weaknesses, and Smoczynska’s set pieces aim for a wild sense of what it might be like if Jacques Demy attempted a supernatural thriller. It’s too bad, then, that the narrative doesn’t make any damn sense, nor do the lyrics of the persistent synth-pop tunes do

know before, and Broadbent’s performance is endearing as always. But Tony is too thinly drawn: We never get a sense of what sort of person he is, or what lessons he needs to learn. Whatever they are, he seems to learn them, so good for him, I suppose. Opens March 17 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (PG-13)—Eric D. Snider

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

DAUGHTERS OF THE DUST BBB It is fitting and just that Julie Dash’s landmark film—the firstever feature by an African-American woman director to get U.S. theatrical distribution—should get a 25th anniversary restoration. And it is also fair to explore whether it was actually great, or simply groundbreaking. The setting is certainly distinctive, as Dash explores the African-American Peazant family of the South Carolina Sea Islands circa 1902, as many of them prepare to leave their long-time home for the mainland. The episodic narrative follows many characters—matriarch Nana (Cora Lee Day), who plans to remain; expecting couple Eli (Adisa Anderson) and Eula (Alva Rogers), whose impending parenthood is complicated by an act of violence; prodigal daughter Yellow Mary (Barbara-O)—and the performances are often not quite up to the heavy material they’re asked to take on. But Dash’s eye for imagery is exceptional, as she creates a vivid sense of place from a tree-shrouded cemetery to bright expanses of beach. If the story never reaches a fully satisfying emotional resolution, it’s only because Dash seems to feel she had one movie in which to tell the entire history of a people. Let’s prove her wrong. Opens March 17 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (NR)—Scott Renshaw

anything to advance the plot or themes in a meaningful way. The relationships between characters are generally incomprehensible, to the point where the one subplot that aims for any emotional connection just gets lost in the choreography and random bursts of gore. Opens March 17 at Tower Theatre. (NR)—SR

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0 | MARCH 16, 2017

TRUE BY B I L L F RO S T @bill_frost

Ham Fist

Ka-Pow! Boff! Blerg ...

Marvel’s Iron Fist packs little punch; Into the Badlands delivers the kung-fu action. Marvel’s Iron Fist Friday, March 17 (Netflix)

Series Debut: Well, this sucks. Of all the Netflix/Marvel adaptations, I was most looking forward to Iron Fist, one of my favorite comic-book titles from back in the day. Where Daredevil was a fantastic surprise and killer introduction to this Marvel microverse, and Jessica Jones and Luke Cage delved even deeper into characters and motivations, Iron Fist is just … there. “Cultural appropriation” aside, the story of rich kid Danny Rand (Finn Jones) being orphaned in the Himalayas and trained in supernatural-adjacent martial arts (which includes manifesting a literal “iron fist”) to Save This City is one that’s been reinvented successfully ad infinitum, from Batman to Arrow. Unfortunately, Iron Fist’s “deadly kung-fu action” is mostly backyard pro wrestling-level, Jones is too bland to carry the dramatic side, and the exposition-heav y writing is more like Ham Fist. Sigh. On the upside, it’s the final lead-in to The Defenders team-up—maybe this Iron Fist will work better within an ensemble. In the background. Silently.

Into the Badlands Sunday, March 19 (AMC)

Season Premiere: Now this is how you do deadly kung-fu action. Since the first season of Into the Badlands aired way back in 2015, long before we entered into our own dystopian future, I’d suggest a Netflix refresher of those six episodes, which introduced Sunny (Daniel Wu), a bullet-biking warrior who serves one of seven warlord barons that rule future effed-up ’Merica. Sunny’s looking for a way out of the Badlands for his pregnant wife, and his super-powered protégée M.K. (Aramis Knight) knows a place away from the despotic dickheads (Canada?). Meanwhile, warlord The Widow (Emily Beecham) has a different plan: kill off the other six and take it all for herself. The plot isn’t always easy to track, but Into the Badlands’ martial-arts sequences are stunning—and a fun break from The Walking Dead’s gun-crazy melodrama.

Cosplay Melee Tuesday, March 21 (Syfy)

Series Debut: Syfy’s previous foray into costume reality, 2013’s Heroes of Cosplay, was an overly staged pile of hot garbage that made all involved look like pissy idiots—you know, a basic successful reality show. Despite its clunky title (“What’s a ‘me-lee?’” asks the average American who can’t place apostrophes correctly or differentiate “lose” and “loose”), Cosplay Melee is at least an improvement, focusing on Face Off-style competition rather than manufactured drama. Yvette Nicole Brown hosts, but the real reason to watch is judge LeeAnna Vamp, a pro cosplayer who must be seen to be believed. Oh, and it’s pronounced “may-lay.”

Shots Fired Wednesday, March 22 (Fox)

Series Debut: Oh look, another cop show. But this one is about race relations, social unrest, media bias and everything else that broadcast TV never gets right (with the possible exception of ABC’s kinda-preachy American Crime). Shots Fired—billed as an “event series,” code for “we’ll be lucky to air 10 episodes”—centers on two murders in a small North Carolina town: a white college student and a black teen, both at the hands of police officers. Much handwringing and “ripped-from-the-headlines” pontificating ensue. Again, American Crime does it better, but, if you’re a fan of Richard Dreyfuss’ overacting, tune right in.

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Marvel’s Iron Fist (Netflix)

Rogue Wednesday, March 22 (Audience/DirecTV)

Season Premiere: So, what’s going with Rogue? It began as the story of undercover Oakland cop Grace (Thandie Newton) out to avenge her son’s death, but then she became an FBI agent in San Francisco and hooked up with mysterious security consultant Ethan (Cole Hauser), eventually following him to Chicago and—spoiler—winding up dead in a dumpster so she could move to Westworld. Then, a new Fed (Sarah Carter) and a new femme fatale (Ashley Greene) entered Ethan’s vaguely criminal life to carry Rogue through Season 3. Now, for the fourth and final season, we’re back in San Francisco with a pair of new cops (Meaghan Rath and Neal McDonough) on Ethan’s ass—if Greene (really, the only worthwhile part of Rogue any more) doesn’t put him in the ground first. FYI: This paragraph is the most that’s ever been written about Rogue.

Listen to Frost Mondays at 8 a.m. on X96 Radio From Hell, and on the TV Tan podcast via Stitcher, iTunes, Google Play and billfrost.tv.

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MUSIC HOME OF THE

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Quiet Oaks outgrows their past with Pretty Alright.

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w/ Andrew Goldring, Strange Familia Friday, March 17, 8 p.m. The Urban Lounge 241 S. 500 East 801-746-0557 $5 21+ theurbanloungeslc.com

DJ RUDE BOY

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QUIET OAKS ALBUM RELEASE

SMOOTH SOUNDS BY:

Oaks just jacks up the passion and the volume. The EP, Sayer says, was written in haste, since “there’s no point in going on tour if you don’t have something to promote.” Not surprisingly, throughout that 45-stop jaunt, Quiet Oaks earned a reputation for connecting with their audiences and leaving them fulfilled. Shows in Chicago and Nashville sold-out on word-ofmouth. The buzz will only get louder once their local and national fans get a taste of Pretty Alright, Quiet Oaks’ first full-length album. Sandberg and Sayer say the album—which the band wrote while living in the same house just down the road from the Bongo— represented an opportunity to really demonstrate Quiet Oaks’ breadth. Its 10 tracks include re-recordings of three songs from Dreams (“Guns,” “Father Knows” and “Keep It Together”) and seven new ones that find their heavier, louder songs still rife with emotional significance. Mature but youthful, confident and heavy on two levels, Pretty Alright finds the band achieving their intended end: shedding but not rejecting their old identity, and existing comfortably in their new one. Of course, this is just in time for the band to leave Utah in late summer or early fall. “There’s still a low ceiling here,” Sayer says, while also noting the support they’ve received from local fans. “We can sell-out shows in Chicago and Nashville,” Sandberg adds, “but we still haven’t sold out The Urban Lounge.” This is profoundly upsetting—but it would be wrong to hoard Quiet Oaks for ourselves. CW

t was hot at City Weekly’s Utah Beer Festival in 2014. One of the shadiest spots in Washington Square that day happened to be the modest bleachers on the north end of the City and County Building, where one local band was loading out while another— The North Valley, it turned out—loaded in. I wasn’t on the job then, and had been telling myself I was on a break from music. Honestly, I was curious what I’d missed in the local scene over the past several years. Based solely on this one group of largely hirsute dudes, and the first verse of their first songs, that turned out to be a lot. So even in the shade of the square’s tall trees, as The North Valley, with charisma and exuberance, played a steady stream of great songs that updated the Lauren Canyon sound for the millennial crowd, I was hot with anger. I’d deprived myself of some truly great music. Afterward, the band passed out copies of their album Patterns in Retrospect (thenorthvalley.bandcamp.com). The longer I spoke with them, the more CDs drummer Spencer Sayer and singer/bassist Dane Sandberg, now sharing a cold pitcher with me in the dark, redcast Bongo bar, put in my hands. Like bands do, they just wanted someone to hear them. Well, I heard. And the day sticks with me: Faces of the people who heard the music and came to fill the stands. The way rays of sunlight poked through treetops like little spotlights. The sound of Spenny Relyea’s and Jon Butler’s guitar solos. Hot anger giving way to chills. The tang of my first sour beer. Leaving with three discs—one to play, one to give away and one to keep unopened for the day when it would fetch pretty pennies on Discogs or eBay. By the time they handed me City Weekly’s music reins 10 months later, The North Valley had gone away. That was particularly infuriating—until I heard that four of the five members had immediately formed a new band, Quiet Oaks. I hit their Bandcamp page like a home invasion, hoping they’d be as good as The North Valley. Sayer laughs and says, “So were we!” “We don’t really like talking about The North Valley,” Sandberg says, “because people bring it up all the time.” They’re tired of telling the story of how Spenny Relyea, the band’s other primary songwriter, left for reasons they prefer to keep private; they still love the guy. Also tiresome is feeling that, in spite of starting Quiet Oaks so quickly and with immediate success, they’d always be regarded as used-to-bes. “It’s different when people are really enthusiastic about the music,” he says. It’s when people appear to wish for The North Valley, asking, ‘What happened?’ or saying, ‘You guys were so good!’” without hearing Quiet Oaks. Sandberg and Relyea split the songwriting duties in the old band, and fans didn’t prefer one’s work over the other’s, rightly attributing the tunes to the band. And Quiet Oaks’ music is essentially the same, Sandberg says; “It’s just heavier.” To be sure, the band emphasizes the rock. “Go to Your Grave,” the opening track of their Put Your Dreams Where They Belong EP, has an insistent beat and subtly frenzied guitar solo. But the incisive, singer-songwriterly lyrics remain. It’s very much still Canyon-esque. Quiet

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MUSIC

Cruel Water

Lunar Twin’s spooky night at the beach. BY ALEX SPRINGER comments@cityweekly.net @captainspringer

uring the day, the beach is a sunny, welcoming place where people feel comfortable removing most of their clothes and throwing Frisbees with strangers. At night, it takes on a more sinister tone. The water becomes hungry and ominous, the sand refuses to yield to your toes and the otherwise soothing sound of the breakers resembles the breathing of an enigmatic stranger who might be following you to your car. A moondrenched surf on a long-forgotten shoreline is exactly what comes to life on Night Tides (Moon Sounds), the newest album from Lunar Twin. This evocative, tropical noir sound is partially inspired by the literal ocean separating multi-instrumentalist Chris Murphy and vocalist Bryce Boudreau. Murphy creates Lunar Twin’s layered, synth-saturated arrangements locally and sends them to Boudreau, who writes lyrics and tracks vocals from his home on the big island of Hawaii. “We’re always messaging—lots of texts and emails,” Murphy says on a conference call with his bandmate. “We have a good relationship—we can both be creative without interfering with one another’s creativity.” Murphy and Boudreau met in 2011, while the former was playing with Night Sweats (not to be confused with Nathaniel Rateliff & The Night Sweats). The band was headed to the Denver Underground Music Festival, and Boudreau decided to join. “It wasn’t until later that we started to work together,” Murphy says. “He was in Hawaii and he liked a song that I had made and asked to put vocals to it. From there, we just kept making tunes, and it turned out to be something bigger than we expected.” After the pair found the sweet spot for their long-distance collaboration, they released their first self-titled EP (Lunar Industries) in 2015. With their single “Champagne,” the duo was able to reach across the Atlantic and establish themselves. “We didn’t

Bryce Boudreau and Chris Murphy have many gigs at the beginning, so we just started checking out other bands who played the same kind of music as we did,” Boudreau says. Many of these acts were already established in Europe and they suggested Lunar Twin contact a German label called Emerald & Doreen. The duo sent a demo and, Boudreau says, “they contacted us right away.” This led to the release of the EP Champagne (Remixes). Lunar Twin went a bit closer to home for their next release, signing with Moon Sounds—a Texas label mainly comprised of shoegaze bands. They contacted the label through mutual friends Shauna McLarnon and Alex Kretov of the Toronto-based dreampop duo Ummagma. The association with Moon Sounds led to further waxing of Lunar Twin’s musical network, with the pair befriending Danish dark wave/post-punk trio Foreign Resort and Australian shoegaze foursome Bloodhounds On My Trail. Murphy and Boudreau recorded and produced Night Tides themselves in Murphy’ home studio. For post-production, they teamed up with longtime collaborator Scott Selfridge (Night Sweats, Red Bennies, Coyote Hoods), who mastered Night Tides at IMD Recordings. Tonally, Night Tides continues to explore the work that Lunar Twin pioneered on their EP. Images of haunted tropics and coastal neon rise from Boudreau’s overcast lyrics, and his gravelly croon ebbs and flows with tidal rhythm. Despite the geographic distance between the two men, Murphy’s thoughtful, deliberate arrangements mesh perfectly with Boudreau’s vocals. It’s not what one expects of music inspired by a tropical island, but it doesn’t all have to be upbeat cheeseburger-in-paradise fare. Rather, Night Tides succeeds at capturing a darker nuance of the islands, as well as another irony. “The more time you spend in Hawaii, the more you get away from beach culture,” Boudreau says. “Maui and Hawaii island, where I live, [are] very mountainous. Lots of back roads and no freeways—it’s very different from the Waikiki vibe.” Murphy, who visited Maui with his girlfriend while Lunar Twin was recording, had the same experience— one that stuck with him. Night Tides’ title track, which closes the album, was created after he returned from the island, he says. “It helped bring the whole album to fruition, and I really like how it turned out.” CW

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 33

LUCKY 13TH

PINKY’S CABARET 4141 So. State Street 801.261.3463

THURSDAY 3/16

Moving Units Presents The Songs Of Joy Division w/ Viktor Fiction, Soviet

We always say how everything cool comes around again, meaning that when something—a sound, a style—goes out of vogue, if there was anything to it, it’ll be resurrected at some point. Currently, one of the big retro movements is next-wave new wave/ post-punk/goth rock/synth pop, and Los Angeles dance punks are among the best of the backtracking bunch. (Side note for fans of the sound: There’s some great stuff happening locally, with bands like Fossil Arms, Sculpture Club and Big Wild Wings. If you haven’t done so already, check them out.) Moving Units, however, has been doing it for quite some time now—damn near 15 years. So it’s a bit odd that they’ve zoomed in on a Joy Division and not only covered an entire album of their songs, but performing it on tour. Bringing back a sound is one thing. Paying tribute is another. But when you could simply cover a song, and instead elect to retread someone else’s hits, then take the show on the road? Well, that gets an all-caps “WTF is that about, borrowing that much of someone else’s music?” It doesn’t matter how good Collision with Joy Division is (and it’s almost too good). You don’t, in the words of Eli Morrison, one of our own respected local musicians and a passionate JD devotee, “fuck with the sacred.” Anyway, Moving Units performs Collision along with a second set of their own material tonight. (Randy Harward) Metro Music Hall, 615 W. 100 South, 8 p.m., $10, 21+, metromusichall.com

Terrance Simien

MICHAEL WEINTROB

34 | MARCH 16, 2017

BY RANDY HARWARD & ALEX SPRINGER

JEFF JACQUIN

FRIDAY MARCH 17

LIVE

THIS WEEK’S MUSIC PICKS

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE @ CITYWEEKLY.NET

FRIDAY & SATURDAY 3/17-18 Terrance Simien & the Zydeco Experience

I defy anyone to resist the good-time allure of zydeco music. OK—accordions aren’t for everyone. But the ol’ squeezebox has gotten an undeserved bad rap, marked as an instrument for dweebs and ranking alongside bagpipes on the Great Big List of Strident and Unwieldly So-Called “Musical” Instruments That Also Look Like Medical Devices. Especially when the guy playing it wears a big, cheesy grin. What the hell does he have to smile about, right? Well, that’s the thing about zydeco, which is essentially Cajun music mixed with R&B and blues. It might start with a base of swampborn sounds played by ostensibly toothless old men, but give it an honest listen and you’ll see that it strikes a jubilant tone that you don’t just hear but feel—largely thanks to the accordion. When you spice it up with R&B (another palpable sound) and blues (the most commiserative and cathartic musical style), it just gets better. It lifts you right up from down in the dumps and reminds you that every day is a gift and therefore ripe for celebration. And when your host/maestro is Terrance Simien, a truly happy man with an infectious grin and love of people—and a knack

Moving Units for squeezin’ beauty out of that ol’ box— you’re guaranteed to feel more than alive when you leave his show. (RH) The Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main, Park City, 8 p.m., $23-$35 presale, $28-$40 day of show, egyptiantheatrecompany.org

SATURDAY 3/18

Castle, Goya, Aneurysm, Barlow, Dissension

There’s nothing like a hefty dose of doom metal to drive a stake deep into the heart of Old Man Winter. With stake and mallet firmly gripped in their capable hands, Los Angeles-based dark

Castle

ERIC HAINES

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13TH ANNIVERSARY

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ST. PINKY'S DAY

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THURSDAY:

FRIDAY:

Rick Gerber @ 10:00 SATURDAY:

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 35

32 Exchange Place • 801-322-3200 www.twistslc.com • 11:00am - 1:00am

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PIG-EON @ 7:00, then VJ Birdman on the big screen

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36 | MARCH 16, 2017

LIVE

St.

• Jameson Girls • Swag & Giveaways • Themed Jameson Cocktails • Live Music a y d i r • $5 Cover f MARCH

JOHN CLARK

PaRty’s Day

lords Castle are headlining the Still Reaping Tour in grim observance of their 2016 release Welcome to the Graveyard (Van). Frontwoman Elizabeth Blackwood’s shrapnel-ravaged vocals have been freshly sharpened by Mat Davis’ grindstone guitar chords and tempered by the forge of Al McCartney’s drums. A chaotic cadre of metal luminaries also takes part in Castle’s nocturnal reverie, including the sludge metal-slinging Goya, power-punk shock troopers Aneurysm and local metal mavens Barlow and Dissension. It’s a lineup that promises to summon the doomed gods of metal’s underworld for an evening of sacrilege and demonic merriment. (Alex Springer) Club X, 445 S. 400 West, 8 p.m., $12, 21+, clubxslc.com

TUESDAY 3/21

Summer Cannibals, Slow Caves

How I encountered Portland garage-pop band Summer Cannibals, as described in a City Weekly feature clear back in the yesteryear 2015: “Four clicks of drumsticks. Bass and drums, pumping insistently, followed by a nasty, fuzzy guitar riff. The actual video part of the YouTube video didn’t matter. Not when you have texts to return. This was just an exploratory listen to see if Summer Cannibals warranted a measly concert preview blurb. But those clicks, that rhythm, that fuzz.” The

Summer Cannibals

video I was talking about was a live-in-thestudio performance by the then-quartet for Austin’s Do512 Lounge Sessions. In the song, a defiant eff-you to a waste-of-time relationship, frontwoman Jessica Boudreaux smiles and bounces around between being adorable and badass, and her bandmates all clearly have a blast onstage. Their personalities so suit the band’s sweet sugar-fuzz sound that the total package is incredibly fulfilling. But on their third album Full of It—their first for venerable Olympia, Wash., indie label Kill Rock Stars, they sound pissed off, positively chafed and burning. The band’s various interviews about the album suggest it’s because the record is an accidental breakup record, thanks to the relationship between Boudreaux and nerdy-cool founding guitarist Marc Swart. The 11-track album roars by in just about 30 minutes, and hits somewhere in between the Breeders’ pop and Sleater-Kinney’s snarl. And Boudreaux is less smiley in the videos. It’s a drag, but also cool to see her, a rock ’n’ roll noob shortly before forming this band, becoming a confident frontwoman of striking presence—whatever her mood. (RH) Kilby Court, 741 S. 330 West, 7 p.m., $10, kilbycourt.com

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Shawnee and Steve Goodman

AFTER PARADE IRISH BREAKFAST

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Lucy Wachtor, Brady Williams saturday 3/18

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Tuesday 3/21

open mic night

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 37

w/ the wayne hoskins band

| CITY WEEKLY |

JAGERTOWN

eagle & country fan fest local fan jam

BREAKFAST BUFFET - $10 1PM TOM BENNETT 10 PM DJ LATU BAGPIPERS THROUGHOUT THE DAY NCAA GAMES sunday, march 19 $12 SUNDAY FUNDAY BRUNCH $3 BLOODY MARY’S & $3 MIMOSAS FROM 10AM-2PM TRIVIA NIGHT 7PM

3PM TOM BENNETT 6PM MATTHEW AND THE HOPE 9PM DJ LATU BAGPIPERS THROUGHOUT THE DAY Saturday, March 18

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Tim Dwyer, Tom Riemondy, Steve Brown

Wednesday, March 15 IRISH TRIVIA FACTORY 7PM Thursday, March 16 NCAA GAMES

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Pixie and the Partygrass Boys

ALYSSA RISLEY

The Best Apres Ski Destination

According to the tall tale that chronicles the origins of local “ski bums and hippies” Pixie and the Partygrass Boys, partygrass is a musical hybrid that channels bluegrass roots through a pop music lens. In other words, it’s twangy Americana fare that originates from the band’s deep love of musicians like Michael Jackson and Usher. Their pop sensibilities make songs like “Running” and “For You” accessible to bluegrass initiates, but it’s their crispy, country-fried exterior that makes them ideal music for a Saturday night at the Spur. There’s something comforting about bouncy, banjo-driven ballads about love and heartbreak that reference Moab and Salt Lake City directly. Pixie and the boys know that Utah’s got plenty of its own dysfunction, and partygrass just might be the right soundtrack for drinking all that dysfunction away. (Alex Springer) The Spur Bar & Grill, 352 Main, Park City, 10 p.m., free, thespurbarandgrill.com

THURSDAY 3/16 LIVE MUSIC

Bebe Rexha + Daniel Skye (The Depot) Live Music at El Chanate (Snowbird) Moving Units Presents the Song of Joy Division + Viktor Fiction + Soviet (Metro Music Hall) see p. 34 Scary Uncle Steve + Wicked Bears + The Avenues (The Urban Lounge) Whiskey Myers + Josh Field Band (The State Room)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE

| CITY WEEKLY |

38 | MARCH 16, 2017

SATURDAY 3/18

CONCERTS & CLUBS

SPIRITS • FOOD • GOOD COMPANY 3.16

MORGAN SNOW

3.17

PIXIE & THE PARTYGRASS BOYS

3.18

TONY HOLIDAY & THE VELVETONES

3.20 OPEN BLUES JAM HOSTED BY ROBBY’S BLUES EXPLOSION 3.22 CLUSTER PLUCK 3.23 SIMPLY B 3. 24 THE POUR 3.25 TRIGGERS AND SLIPS

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DJ/VJ Birdman (Bourbon House) Dueling Pianos (The Spur) Dueling Pianos (Tavernacle) Funkin’ Fridays w/ DJ Rude Boy + Bad Boy Brian (Johnny’s on Second) Hot Noise + Guest DJ (The Red Door) Housepitality w/ Funkee Boss (Downstairs) Jazz Jam Session (Sugar House Coffee) Jazz Joint Thursday w/ Mark Chaney & the Garage All Stars (Garage on Beck) The New Wave ‘80s Night w/ DJ Radar (Area 51) Therapy Thursdays feat. ARTY (Sky) Velvet (Gothic + Industrial + Dark Wave) w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51)

FRIDAY 3/17 LIVE MUSIC

The Music of Andrew Boss with Poonhammer + N.E. Last Words + Seven Second Memory (Club X) Après Live Music (Park City Mountain) Badfeather (The Canyons) Carousel Kings + Abandoned by Bears + A Bad Case of Big Mouth (In the Venue) ClusterPluck (Cinnabar Lounge) Folk Hogan (The Cabin) Joey Fatts + D Savage + Eddy Baker + Aston Matthews + AZA (Kilby Court)

Live Bands (Johnny’s on Second) Live Local Music (A Bar Named Sue) Live Music (Outlaw Saloon) Live Music at The Aerie (Snowbird) Live Music at The Wildflower (Snowbird) Metal Bash feat. ABLYSS + Rue the Day + Ravenmind + Invictus + Elysium (The Loading Dock) The Metal Dogs (Brewskis) Quiet Oaks album release + Andrew Goldring + Strange Familia (The Urban Lounge) see p. 31 Royal Bliss (The Royal) Sister Wives + Major Tom and the Moon Boys (Garage on Beck) Terrance Simien & the Zydeco Experience (Egyptian Theatre) see p. 34 Young North + Mythic Valley + Steven Fogamomi (Muse Music Café)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE

All-Request Gothic + Industrial + EBM + and Dark Wave w/ DJ Vision (Area 51) Chaseone2 (Twist) DJ Juggy (Bourbon House) Dueling Pianos feat. Troy & Drew (Tavernacle) Friday Night Fun (All-Request Dance) w/ DJ Twitch (Area 51) Funkin’ Friday w/ DJ Rude Boy & Bad Boy Brian (Johnny’s on Second) Hot Noise (The Red Door)

SATURDAY 3/18 LIVE MUSIC

Aprés Live Music (Park City Mountain) Avion Roe + It Lives, It Breathes + gP. + Vitae + No Robot (The Loading Dock) Blue Divide (Brewskis) Castle + Goya + Aneurysm + Dissension + Barlow (Club X) see p. 34 Ché Zuro (Deer Valley) Chris Orrock (Cucina) Ethan Perry & The Remedy (Park City Base Area)

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The Westerner: Cheap Beer, No Cover, Free Line-Dancing Lessons

The parking lot is huge and already half-full. It has to be, if it’s gonna accommodate as many people as The Westerner’s cavernous interior does. Here, the long-running country music nightspot’s dance floor fills with patrons who line up as neatly as the cars outside. It’s Wednesday night, which means free linedancing lessons and cheap steins ($3 domestic; $5 for fancier stuff). From across the expansive dance floor, the club’s instructor welcomes and corrals everyone in a reedy twang. “Please grab yourself a partner—girls grab a guy; guys grab a girl!” He instructs the couples, counting steps and calling out instructions: “1-2-3!” “Eyes up!” “What’s our rule? If you have a drink in your hand, stay off the floor!” “If you’re gonna do any overhead lifts, go into the corners where nobody’s around!” “If you wanna make it elegant, do one of these (waves arm). That one’s more for the ladies!” “Left … right …” “Do it again!” Between songs, some dancers swap partners while others stick together, and more bodies fill the floor. As a non-dancer with an aversion to modern country music, I’m not inclined to join in and scoot my boots—but the atmosphere is undeniably upbeat. With no cover, cheap beer and ridiculously good bacon cheeseburgers, I can imagine returning. And maybe someday, with enough peach and cream wheat beer in my belly, I might even give the dancing a try. (Randy Harward) The Westerner, 3360 S. Redwood Road, 7-9 p.m., free, westernerslc.com RANDY HARWARD

New Expanded Hours for Rye: Monday-Friday from 9am-2pm Saturday and Sunday from 9am-3pm Friday and Sunday from 6pm-11pm

Fat Candice (The Cabin) Jamestown Revival (The State Room) Joy Spring Band (Sugar House Coffee) Kilby Court Jazz Night w/ Miles and Miles From Your Nice Warm Bed + Major Development (Kilby Court) Live Local Music (A Bar Named Sue) Live Music (Outlaw Saloon) Live Music at The Aerie (Snowbird) Live Trio (The Red Door) Love & Hustle + Khensu + Skellum + Regular Ass Dude (Metro Music Hall) MiMS (Club Elevate) Mountain Country (The Garage on Beck) Panic! At the Disco + MisterWives + Saint Motel (UCCU Center) Pixie and the Partygrass Boys (The Spur) see p. 38 The Raven and the Writing Desk (Alleged) Royal Bliss (Kamikazes) Salt Lake Symphony: Musicians’ Choice (Libby Gardner Hall) Smiling Souls (The Canyons) Spazmatics (Liquid Joe’s) Terrance Simien & the Zydeco Experience (Egyptian Theatre) see p. 34

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SUNDAY 3/19 LIVE MUSIC

Access Music Program (The Spur) Après Live Music (Park City Mountain) The Bastard Suns + HiFi Murder + LSDO (Metro Music Hall) Courtney Spaulding (Deer Valley) Live Bluegrass (Club 90) Live Music at El Chanate (Snowbird) Sacred Music Evening (Tabernacle) Varsity + I Hate Heroes (The Loading Dock)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Dueling Pianos (The Spur) DJ Curtis Strange (Willie’s Lounge) Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig Pub) Red Cup Event w/ DJ Juggy (Downstairs)

ST. PATRICK’S DAY MONDAY 3/20

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40 | MARCH 16, 2017

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Ariana Grande (Vivint Smart Home Arena) A Bach Birthday Celebration (Bountiful Davis Art Center) Bad Omens + Classic Jack + Native/ Tongue + Hollow + I Am (The Loading Dock) Dead Meadow + Matt Hollywood & the Bad Feelings + Super 78 (The Urban Lounge) Game of Thrones Live Concert Experience (Maverik Center) The Jupiter String Quartet (Kingsbury Hall) The Joe McQueen Quartet (Bourbon House) Live Music at The Bistro (Snowbird) Summer Cannibals + Slow Caves (Kilby Court) see p. 36 The Werks + Cure for the Common (O.P. Rockwell)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Open Jazz Jam (Bourbon House) Open Mic (The Wall at BYU)

WEDNESDAY 3.22 LIVE MUSIC

The Band Ice Cream (Metro Music Hall) Dinner & A Mixtape (Rye Diner & Drinks) Earth Groans (The Loading Dock) Live Jazz (Club 90) Live Music at The Aerie (Snowbird) Rohrer (Shades of Pale) WHY? + Open Mike Eagle + Bogan Via (The Urban Lounge)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE DJ Birdman (Twist) DJ Curtis Strange (Willie’s Lounge) Dueling Pianos (Tavernacle) Open Mic (Muse Music) Open Mic (Velour) Temple (Gothic and Industrial) w/ DJ Mistress Nancy (Area 51)

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 41

TYPO

BY DAVID LEVINSON WILK

ACROSS

1. Open ____ night 2. Prize for Pizarro 3. Compiler of an 1855 reference work 4. One way to sing

45. Swimmer Matt who won eight Olympic gold medals 46. Frigid 48. Three-time National League MVP Albert 49. ____-Magnon man 52. Wee bit 54. Spherical 55. “You’re preaching to the choir!” 57. French resort town 58. “Elder” or “Younger” Roman statesman 62. T, on a fraternity house 63. Snake for a charmer

Last week’s answers

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

DOWN

5. Actress Bonet 6. Mouthed off to 7. Nebula Award genre 8. George Clooney played one on TV in the ‘90s 9. Happy end-of-week cry 10. Descartes and Magritte 11. When many duels were held 12. 2016 Mark Twain Prize recipient Bill 13. Fits 21. “Treasure Island” author’s inits. 22. Morocco’s capital 23. The whole shebang 24. Sign before Virgo 28. Words before “on thick” or “on the line” 30. Prominent part of an aardvark 33. Turf 34. Calendar pgs. 35. Org. that publishes weekly player rankings 37. Check for freshness, in a way 38. Leader’s cry 39. It brings traffic to a standstill 42. Singer with the site imaginepeace.com 43. Actor Beatty 44. Brick color

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

1. Exxon merger partner 6. NNW’s opposite 9. Vehicles that always look smart in reverse? 14. Kurd, perhaps 15. Horizontal: Abbr. 16. “C’mon, sleepyhead!” 17. Cab stoppers? 18. PBS’ “____ the Science Kid” 19. Hindu god of thunder 20. When the ‘80s pop music lover made a typo, she realized she had written ____ 23. One in your corner 25. German camera brand 26. Competed in the first leg of a triathlon 27. Director of 2015’s “Chi-Raq” 28. Drug for Timothy Leary 29. “American Dad!” airer 31. Its govs. have included Mario and Andrew Cuomo 32. “____ luck!” 34. 2016 Disney film with the tagline “The ocean is calling” 36. When the charitable giver made a typo, she realized she had written ____ 40. T. rex and others 41. Supermodel Kate 44. Deg. from Wharton 47. “Shop ____ you drop” 48. %: Abbr. 50. Not you specifically 51. Is broadcast 53. Gold Medal product 55. Light music source? 56. When the gut course-loving college quarterback made a typo, he realized he had written ____ 59. En pointe, in ballet 60. Sanctioning assn. for pugilists 61. Hill played by Kerry Washington in the 2016 TV movie “Confirmation” 64. Shelley or Keats, poetically speaking 65. Brooks of “Spaceballs” 66. Caesar dressing? 67. Something to carve out 68. Hollywood’s Harris and Helms 69. Confess (to)

SUDOKU

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| CITY WEEKLY |

42 | MARCH 16, 2017

CROSSWORD PUZZLE

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY B Y R O B

PHOTO OF THE WEEK BY

@kirkpetersweet

B R E Z S N Y

Go to realastrology.com for Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text-message horoscopes. Audio horoscopes also available by phone at 877-873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) Would you like some free healing that’s in alignment with cosmic rhythms? Try this experiment. Imagine that you’re planning to write your autobiography. Create an outline that has six chapters. Each of the first three chapters will be about a past experience that helped make you who you are. In each of the last three chapters, you will describe a desirable event that you want to create in the future. I also encourage you to come up with a boisterous title for your tale. Don’t settle for My Life So Far or The Story of My Journey. Make it idiosyncratic and colorful, perhaps even outlandish, like Piscean author Dave Eggers’ A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) You know that forbidden fruit you’ve had your eyes on? Maybe it isn’t so forbidden any more. It could even be evolving toward a state where it will be both freely available and downright healthy for you to pluck. But there’s also a possibility that it’s simply a little less risky than it was before. And it might never become a fully viable option. So here’s my advice: Don’t grab and bite into that forbidden fruit yet. Keep monitoring the situation. Be especially attentive to the following questions: Do you crave the forbidden fruit because it would help you flee a dilemma you haven’t mustered the courage to escape from? Or because it would truly be good for you to partake of the forbidden fruit?

ARIES (March 21-April 19) The more unselfish and compassionate you are in the coming weeks, the more likely it is you will get exactly what you need. Here are four ways that can be true: 1. If you’re kind to people, they will want to be kind to you in return. 2. Taking good care of others will bolster their ability to take good care of you. 3. If you’re less obsessed with I-me-mine, you will magically dissolve psychic blocks that have prevented certain folks from giving you all they are inclined to give you. 4. Attending to others’ healing will teach you valuable lessons in how to heal yourself—and how to get the healing you yearn for from others.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) I expect you will get more than your usual share of both sweetness and tartness in the coming days. Sometimes one or the other will be the predominant mode, but on occasion they will converge to deliver a complex brew of WOW!-meets-WTF! Imagine chunks of sour apples in your vanilla fudge ripple ice cream. Given this state of affairs, there’s no good reason for you to be blandly kind or boringly polite. Use a saucy attitude to convey your thoughtfulness. Be as provocative as you are tender. Don’t just be nice—be impishly and subversively nice. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) “I want to gather your darkness in my hands, to cup it like water and drink.” So says Jane Hirshfield in her poem “To Drink.” I bet she was addressing a Scorpio. Does any other sign of the zodiac possess a sweet darkness that’s as delicious and gratifying as yours? Yes, it’s true that you also harbor an unappetizing pocket of darkness, just like everyone else. But that sweet kind—the ambrosial, enigmatic, exhilarating stuff—is not only safe to imbibe, but can also be downright healing. In the coming days, I hope you’ll share it generously with worthy recipients.

MARCH 16, 2017 | 43

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Many Geminis verbalize profusely and acrobatically. They enjoy turning their thoughts into speech, and love to keep social situations lively with the power of their agile tongues. Aquarians and Sagittarians might rival your tribe for the title of The Zodiac’s Best Bullshitters, but I think you’re in the top spot. Having heaped that praise on you, however, I must note that your words don’t always have as much influence as they have entertainment value. You sometimes impress people more than you impact them. But here’s the good news: In the coming weeks, that could change. I suspect your fluency will carry a lot of clout. Your comCAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) munication skills could sway the course of local history. Born in the African nation of Burkina Faso, Malidoma Somé is a teacher who writes books and offers workshops to Westerners CANCER (June 21-July 22) Your world is more spacious than it has been in a long time. Congrats! interested in the spiritual traditions of his tribe. In his native I love the way you have been pushing yourself out of your comfort Dagaare language, his first name means “he who befriends zone and into the wilder frontier. For your next trick, here’s my sug- the stranger/enemy.” I propose that we make you an honorary gestion: Anticipate the parts of you that might be inclined to close “Malidoma” for the next three weeks. It will be a favorable time down again when you don’t feel as brave and free as you do now. Then to forge connections, broker truces and initiate collaborations gently clamp open those very parts. If you calm your fears before they with influences you have previous considered foreign or alien. break out, maybe they won’t break out at all. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) EVERY relationship has problems. No exceptions. In the beginLEO (July 23-Aug. 22) I like rowdy, extravagant longing as much as anyone. I enjoy ning, all might be calm and bright, but eventually cracks will being possessed by a heedless greed for too much of every- appear. Here’s the corollary to that rule: EVERY partner is thing that feels rapturous: delectable food, mysterious sex, imperfect. Regardless of how cool, kind, attractive or smart engrossing information, liberating intoxication and surpris- they might seem in the early stages, they will eventually unveil ing conversations that keep me guessing and improvising for their unique flaws and troubles. Does this mean that all togethhours. But I am also a devotee of simple, sweet longing; pure, erness is doomed? That it’s forever impossible to create satwatchful, patient longing; open-hearted longing that brims isfying unions? The answer is HELL, NO!—especially if you with innocence and curiosity and is driven as much by the urge to keep the following principles in mind: Choose a partner whose bless as to be blessed. That’s the kind I recommend you explore problems are: 1. interesting, 2. tolerable, 3. useful in prodding you to grow or 4. all of the above. and experiment with in the coming days.

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY P. 43 INK P. 44 UTAH JOB CENTER P.45 URBAN LIVING P. 46 NEWS OF THE WEIRD P. 47

| COMMUNITY |

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Saturn has been in your sign steadily since September 2015, and will continue to be there until December 2017. Some traditional astrologers might say you are in a phase of downsizing and selfrestraint. They’d encourage you to be extra strict and serious and dutiful. To them, the ringed planet is an exacting taskmaster. There are some grains of truth in this perspective, but I like to emphasize a different tack. I say that if you cooperate with the rigors of Saturn, you’ll be inspired to become more focused and decisive and disciplined as you shed any flighty or reckless tendencies you might have. Yes, Saturn can be adversarial if you ignore its commands to be faithful to your best dreams. But if you respond gamely, it will be your staunch ally.

INSIDE /

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) I hope you will consider buying yourself some early birthday presents. The celebration is weeks away, but you need some prodding, instigative energy now. It’s crucial that you bring a dose of the starting-fresh spirit into the ripening projects you’re working on. Your mood might get overly cautious and serious unless you infuse it with the spunk of an excited beginner. Of course, only you know what gifts would provide you with the best impetus, but here are suggestions to stimulate your imagination: a young cactus; a jack-in-the-box; a rock with the word “sprout” written on it; a decorated marble egg; a fox mask; a Photoshopped image of you flying through the air like a superhero.

#CWCOMMUNITY

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44 | MARCH 16, 2017

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Looking for experienced APP approved piercers to work in our 3 locations. The following certifications are required; CPR/First Aid and Blood Bourne Pathogens. We specialize in a variety of piercings and use the highest quality of jewelry the industry has to offer including IS, Anotometal, Neometal, BVLA and body gems. Submit your resume to margo@blueboutique.com

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WITH BABS DELAY Broker, Urban Utah Homes & Estates, urbanutah.com Trustee, Utah Transit Authority

Aloha Solar! My wife and I just returned from a vacation in Hawaii to celebrate our anniversary and to get the hell out of Dodge and give into Spring Fever. I chatted up a shuttle driver on one leg of the trip about his living expenses. He said he rented a small twobedroom home downtown for about $2,000 a month and paid about $200 a month for electricity. Nearly everything in Hawaii costs more than on the mainland, except for local produce. Electricity is really pricey because most power is produced through petroleum-fired power plants, and the petroleum has to be shipped in from the mainland. The tropical climate is hot and humid, and locals often run their air conditioning 24/7. The organization Solar Hawaii estimates that the average homeowner uses 4,300 KWH (kilowatt hours) each year, whereas the average mainlander only uses 2,500 KWH. We noticed solar power is really taking hold in the islands. We saw entire subdivisions from the sky with panels on every rooftop, as well as panels on random homes on the beaches and in the mountains. There were no visible panels on most of the older hotels along Waikiki Beach and our driver didn’t know about new construction requirements or if solar had to be incorporated into new buildings and hotels. Within two days of returning from our trip, I received three telemarketing calls from solar companies. Maybe you’ve had the same unwanted calls. The Utah Department of Commerce warns that a new scam involves calls from a fake government agency called the “Utah Public Utilities Commission.” Callers try and get you to sign up for cheap solar panels by a “deadline” to get your credit card info as quickly as possible. State watchdogs are trying to catch the bogus buttheads, but people still seem to fall for these schemes. If you receive these calls, report them to the Utah Division of Consumer Protection (consumerprotection.utah.gov). And make sure you register your phone number(s) on the national Do Not Call Registry (donotcall. gov). It doesn’t guarantee scammers won’t call you, but it can help cut down on unwanted calls. The best news we heard as we said aloha and mahalo to the islands was that a Hawaiian foodbank in Oahu just went solar and saved $41,041 in energy costs the first year—the equivalent of feeding more than 90 people for a year. Brava! n

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Poets Corner

EARLY MARCH AFTER RAIN

In early March City trees rainbathed Take on quick clean rooster-hues And give a moment’s string-tuning That even more than Mid-April’s pea-green cadenza Quivers expectations KEITH MOORE Send your poem (max 15 lines), to: Poet’s Corner, City Weekly, 248 South Main Street, SLC, UT 84101 or e-mail to poetscorner@cityweekly.net.

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Exploiting Villains In February, two teams of South Korean researchers announced cancer-fighting breakthroughs—by taking lessons from how two of medicine’s most vexing, destructive organisms (diarrhea-causing salmonella bacteria and the rabies virus) can access often-unconquerable cancer cells. In journal articles, biologist Jung-joon Min of Chonnam National University described how his team “weaponized” a cancer-fighting invader cell with salmonella to stir up more-robust immune responses, and nanoparticle expert Yu Seok Youn’s Sungkyunkwan University team coated immunizing cells with the rabies protein (since the rabies virus is remarkably successful at invading healthy cells) to reach brain tumors.

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD

Compelling Explanations Oklahoma state Rep. Justin Humphrey, justifying his proposed bill to require a woman seeking an abortion to first identify the father, told a reporter in February that the father’s permission is crucial because, after all, the woman is basically a “host” who “invited that [fetus] in.”

WEIRD

Unclear on the Concept Gemma Badley was convicted in England’s Teesside Magistrates’ Court in February of impersonating British psychic Sally Morgan on Facebook, selling her “readings” as if they were Morgan’s. (To keep this straight: Badley is the illegal con artist, Morgan the legal one.) n Michigan is an “open carry” state, and any adult not otherwise disqualified under state law may “pack heat” in public (except in a few designated zones). In February, an overly earnest Second Amendment fan, James Baker, 24 (accompanied by pal Brandon Vreeland, 40), believed the law was an invitation to walk into the Dearborn police station in full body armor and ski mask, with a semi-automatic pistol and a sawed-off rifle (and have Vreeland photograph officers’ reactions). Yes, both were arrested.

Great Art! French artist Abraham Poincheval told reporters in February that in his upcoming “performance,” he will entomb himself for a week in a limestone boulder at a Paris museum and then, at the conclusion, sit on a dozen bird eggs until they hatch—”an inner journey,” he said, “to find out what the world is.” He apparently failed to learn that from previous efforts, such as the two weeks he spent inside a stuffed bear or his time on the Rhône River inside a giant corked bottle. He told reporters the super-snug tomb has been thoroughly accessorized, providing for breathing, eating, heart monitor and emergency phone—except, they noted, nothing on exactly how toileting will be handled.

Leading Economic Indicators In a first-person profile for the Chicago Tribune in February, marketing consultant Peter Bender, 28, recalled how he worked to maximize his knowledge of the products of company client Hanes— and not just the flagship Hanes underwear but its Playtex and Maidenform brands. In an “empathy” exercise, Bender wore bras for three days (a sports bra, an underwire and a lacy one)—fitted at size 34A (or “less than A,” he said). “These things are difficult,” he wrote on a company blog. “The lacy one,” especially, was “itchy.”

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News You Can Use “Fecal transplants” (replacing a sick person’s gut bacteria with those of a healthier one) are now almost routine treatments for patients with violent abdominal attacks of C. diff bacteria, but University of California researcher Chris Callewaert says the concept also works for people with particularly stinky armpits. Testing identical twins—one odoriferous, the other not—the researcher, controlling for diet and other variables, “cured” the smelly one by swabbing his pit daily with the sweat of the bettersmelling twin. The Callewaert team told a recent conference that they were working on a more general brew of bacteria that might help out anyone with sour armpits. The Weirdo-American Community Stephen Reed, the former mayor of Harrisburg, Pa., pleaded guilty on the eve of his January trial on corruption counts stemming from the approximately 10,000 items of “Wild West” and “Americana” artifacts worth around $8 million that he had bought with public funds during 28 years in office. For some reason, he had a singleminded obsession with creating a local all-things-cowboy museum, and had purchased such items as a stagecoach, stagecoach harnesses, a “Billy the Kid” wanted poster, a wagon wheel and a totem pole. Somehow, he explained, as he was leaving office after being voted out in 2009, the items he had purchased (theoretically, “on behalf of” of Harrisburg) had migrated into his personal belongings. A News of the Weird Classic (May 2013) Caribou Baby, a Brooklyn, “eco-friendly maternity, baby and lifestyle store,” recently (2013) hosted gatherings at which parents exchanged tips on “elimination communication”—the weaning of infants without benefit of diapers. Parents watch for cues, such as a certain “cry or grimace” that supposedly signals the need to hoist the tot onto a potty. The little darlings’ public appearances sometimes call for diapers, but can also be dealt with behind a tree, they say. Said one shocked parent, “I have absolutely been at parties and witnessed people putting their baby over the sink.” (Update: The maternity store is now called Wild Was Mama, and “elimination communication” meetings are not mentioned.) Thanks this week to the News of the Weird Board of Editorial Advisors.

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MARCH 16, 2017 | 47

The Job of the Researcher A National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration “bioacoustic research” team recently reported recording and listening to about 2 million underwater sounds made over a four-month period by various species of dolphins—“whistles,” echolocation “clicks,” and “burst pulses”—and can, they believe, distinguish the sounds to match them to a particular dolphin species (among the five most prevalent) with 84 percent accuracy. The team built a computer algorithm to also make estimating dolphin populations much easier.

Small-Town Government The ex-wife of Deputy Sheriff Corey King of Washington County, Georgia (largest town: Sandersville, pop. 5,900), filed a federal lawsuit in January against King after he arrested her for the “crime” of making a snarky comment about him on Facebook (about his failure to bring the couple’s children their medicine). King allegedly conspired with a friendly local magistrate on the arrest, and though the prosecutor refused the case, King warned the ex-wife that he would still re-arrest her if she made “the mistake of going to Facebook with your little [excrement] … to fuss about.”

| COMMUNITY |

News That Sounds Like a Joke Ex-Colombo family mobster and accused hitman “Tommy Shots” Gioeli, 64, recently filed a federal court lawsuit over a 2013 injury at the Metropolitan Detention Center in New York City. He fell and broke a kneecap while playing ping-pong— allegedly because of water on the floor—awaiting sentencing for conspiracy to commit murder. The New York Post also noted that the “portly” Gioeli, who was later sentenced to 18 years, was quite a sight at trial, carrying his “man purse” each day.

n After the North Dakota House of Representatives voted yet again in January to retain the state’s Sunday-closing “blue laws,” Rep. Bernie Satrom explained to a reporter: “Spending time with your wife, your husband, making him breakfast, bringing it to him in bed” is better than going shopping.

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

n Wells Fargo Bank famously admitted last year that employees (pressured by a company incentive program) had fraudulently opened new accounts for about 2 million existing customers by forging their signatures. In an early lawsuit by a victim of the fraud (who had seven fraudulent accounts opened), the bank argued (and a court agreed!) that the lawsuit had to be handled by arbitration instead of a court of law because the customer had, in the original Wells Fargo contract (that dense, fine-print one he actually signed), agreed to arbitration for “all” disputes. A February Wells Fargo statement to consumerist.com claimed that customers’ forgoing legal rights was actually for their own benefit, in that “arbitration” is faster and less expensive.

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