Clamor 2021

Page 120

Avocado and melon salad Carson Thomas

Perfume spheres of light green and orange, butterfly-cut creamy lobes of avocado made me want to cry for California mountains, fruit trucks laden with fresh melons along twisting highways cutting through rich farmland valleys, patches of dry grass and gnarled trees. Blue mountains hazy with mist and smog over the ranch where my grandfather lived where we cracked clay pigeons with rifles, a sound like terra cotta pots shattering. God, some things are beautiful and worth protecting. I can almost understand why he mistrusted liberals to his grave— when I hit the target, his eyes sparkled, it kept him alive all those years. How could I love him and mistrust him? both at once like a Schrodinger’s cat— a thought experiment I never understood, like America. I can love it, hate it, remain baffled by it— but when winds picked up through California mountains to spread my grandfather’s ashes over his land, I understood for a moment America sang like Whitman to me. 116


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Nightingale

1min
pages 121-122

Contributors

16min
pages 125-134

Avocado and melon salad

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page 120

Frost and Fog

1min
pages 116-117

Funhouse Mirror / rorriM esuohnuF

3min
pages 113-115

Raking Leaves

0
page 111

The Waiting Room

6min
pages 106-109

Tired

3min
pages 98-99

My Mirror

0
page 104

Candle Crabs in Samar

0
page 96

Along for a Ride

0
page 103

Pandemic Philosophy

6min
pages 91-94

Asilomar, December

0
page 87

Mad Like Me

3min
pages 83-84

Digging to China

1min
pages 74-75

crime and punishment

0
page 73

Roy and Dale and Dad

0
pages 67-68

Dissension in the Ranks

0
page 60

BLUEBERRIES AND CRAYFISH

3min
pages 56-57

An Empty Place

1min
page 59

Ghost Crossing

3min
pages 51-52

A short road trip

4min
pages 70-71

Making your bed

0
page 55

And How Bright

1min
pages 47-48

Genesis

1min
pages 39-40

The Hungry College Kid

0
page 36

Thunder Voices

0
page 35

I gave my innocence to a psychiatrist

0
page 24

believing secretly that i would be the one person in the history of man who would live forever

0
page 19

Call It What You Will

1min
pages 41-43

Honey-Sweet and Slow

1min
page 20

Tea Party

2min
pages 17-18
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