May 21, 2014 Flipbook by Scene

VOL. 44 ISSUE 47 • May 21 - 27, 2014 • clevescene.com

GONE DADDY GONE

Elizabeth Perez served in the Marines, went to college and started a family. Now she’s ﬁghting immigration laws after her husband was deported to Mexico. By Eric Sandy

feeling f lat? WE CAN BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE { AND YOUR CUP SIZE!}

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

CALL TODAY FOR YOUR FREE BREAST AUGMENTATION CONSULTATION Nothing looks better on a woman than confidence. At Raj Plastic Surgery, we're confident in our ability to help you make the right decision for you and your body. Discover how breast augmentation can help you achieve the appearance you desire. A little lift on the outside can lead to a big boost on the inside.

Please call 440.808.8030 to schedule your FREE consultation today. rajplasticsurgery.com Joyesh Raj, M.D., F.A.C.S. Chief of Plastic Surgery, Fairview Hospital Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery Certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery

Dr. Joyesh Raj now seeing patients in two locations Western Reserve Plastic Surgery 5005 Rockside Rd, Suite 1225 Independence, OH 44131 216.328.0800

Raj Plastic Surgery

850 Columbia Rd, Suite 300 Westlake, OH 44145 440.808.8030

2 14018_Raj_Breast_Enhancement_Ad.indd 1

2/13/14 10:40 AM

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

MAY 21 – 27, 2014 | VOLUME 44 | NO.47

Dedicated to: Free Times founder Richard H. Siegel (1935-1993) and Scene founder Richard Kabat Publisher Chris Keating Editorial Editor Vince Grzegorek Music Editor Jeff Niesel Staff Writers Sam Allard, Doug Brown, Eric Sandy Web Editor Alaina McConnell Contributing Writer Will Burge Dining Editor Douglas Trattner Contributing Dining Editor Beth Phillips, Jason Beudert Stage Editor Christine Howey Interns Patrick Stoops, Liz Trenholme, Eric Gonzalez, Cortni Dietz

Upfront | 6

Trigger warnings at Oberlin, a goodbye to Derf’s long-running strip, and more

Creative Services Production Manager Steve Miluch Layout Editor/Graphic Designer Alise Belcher Staff Photographer Emanuel Wallace

Facetime | 10

Advertising Advertising Director Jennifer Woomer Retail Sales Director Shayne Rose Sr. Multimedia Account Executives John Crobar Multimedia Account Executives Amanda Klein, Brendan McHugh, Dan Mullin, Shannon McNally Classified Classified Account Executive Alice Leslie

Feature | 12

The pinball wizards at Happy Dog

Elizabeth Perez served in the Marines, went to college and started a family. Now she’s fighting immigration laws after her husband was deported to Mexico.

Marketing Director of Marketing & Public Relations Bob Rotatori Director of Events Jenna Conforti Director of Business Development Madeline Bleiweiss Promotions Coordinator Remi Bruell Business Business Manager Brian Painley Asst. To The Publisher Angela Lott Sales Assistant/Receptionist Megan Stimac Circulation Director Don Kriss Cleveland Scene Magazine is published every week by Euclid Media Group. National Advertising Voice Media Group www.voicemediagroup.com Verified Audit Member Cleveland distribution Scene is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Copyright The entire contents of Cleveland Scene Magazine are copyright 2014 by Euclid Media Group. No portion may be reproduced in whole or in part by any means, including electronic retrieval systems without the express written permission of the publisher. Cleveland Scene Magazine Street Address 1468 W. Ninth St. Suite 805, Cleveland, OH 44113 General Information: 216-241-7550 Retail & Classified Fax: 216-241-6275 Editoral Fax: 216-802-7212 E-mail: scene@clevescene.com

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

CONTENTS 35

@cleveland_scene facebook.com/clevelandscene

Get Out! | 21

Memorial Day weekend is packed with events. We have them all covered here

Stage | 29

An African-American struggles with writing white characters

Art | 31

The sculptor who has never shown his work

Movies | 33

Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore fall flat together again

Eat | 35

...The story continues at clevescene.com

Commercial food photography takes off in Cleveland, the bourbon tasting club you wish you were a part of, and a quick end to Pastas & Pastry

Music | 44

Skrillex swings through town, Blackberry Smoke is the thinking man’s redneck band, plus all the concerts to see this week

Savage Love | 69 A hole new world

Take

SCENE with you with our iPad app! “Cleveland Scene Magazine”

Did you know SCENE is on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram?

We remember the fallen TRI-C’S COMMITMENT TO VETERANS Whether you are a discharged veteran, on active duty or a member of the Guard or Reserve, know that you and your family are welcome home at Cuyahoga Community College (Tri-C®).

tri-c.edu/veterans 4

Where futures begin

Open Tues-Sat 10-4

Learn more and donate at saveCLEkids.org.

W.110th Street

W.117th Street

take a closer look at youth homelessness.

Western

Inventory changes hourly. If you see it, buy it! If you don’t, come back tomorrow!

2110 West 110th St. Cleveland, OH 44102

Shop. Donate. Volunteer. www.clevelandhabitat.org

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Sale good thru May 31

upfront

news scandal and intrigue hit the museum in late 2013. (Design by Aaron Sechrist for Cleveland Scene)

Seven monthS after the Cleveland Museum of Art’s board of trustees attempted to ignore and then cover up the extramarital affair of former Director David Franklin and former employee Christina Gaston, an affair which may or may not have directly led to Gaston’s death and which certainly led to Franklin’s abrupt dismissal, veiled as a resignation, a new director has been appointed. William Griswold, director of the Morgan Library and Museum in New York City, will assume CMA’s top position in September, if not sooner. Stephen Litt, the PD art critic and stenographer for the museum’s board during the Franklin fallout, reported Tuesday morning that Griswold emerged as a top candidate early in the search committee’s process, which included a pool of 30-40 candidates. Unlike Franklin, a chronic drinker and inveterate mumbler, Griswold is said to be a sociable, fun-loving guy who loves joining civic boards and getting involved in the local community. Interim Director Fred Bidwell called Griswold “amazingly warm and engaging” in a Wall Street Journal

tHIS WEEK

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

New ClevelaNd MuseuM of art direCtor is here to stay, he swears story about the appointment. Board members see profit in his natural fundraising abilities and like his stated goal of reaching newer, broader audiences for the museum. In Litt’s piece Tuesday, Griswold responded to questions about how long he expects to stay in town: “I’m staying until I retire or until I get carried out in a box,” Griswold said. “I don’t love jumping around from museum to museum.” That may or may not be the case, but it’s rhetoric Clevelanders tend to get behind. Franklin, too, was considered a long-term guy because of his young children and what was thought to be his commitment to establishing roots in Northeast Ohio. The museum, of course, is desperate for some leadership stability, as it has endured the comings and goings of three directors and four interim directors during the past 15 years, the latest of which has been the biggest blight on the institution’s reputation. (It’s not unlike the Browns or the Cavs in that respect.) Griswold served as the director of the Minneapolis Institute of Arts from 2005-2007. He left after only two years at the helm to return to the Morgan, where he’d

SLAM DUNk JUNk

Cleveland police steal children’s basketball hoop after warning them not to play in the street. See, our local officers do take crime seriously!

POWER OUTAGE

worked previously. The 53-year-old Griswold lives with his partner of 23 years, Christopher Malstead.

Power outage: CounCil okays CPP “Business reset” Fresh off the unequivocal endorsement of the sin tax, Cleveland City Council has returned to advocating for its citizens and its public utilities. In a boring meeting Monday afternoon, Council’s finance committee approved two ordinances intended to increase Cleveland Public Power’s competitiveness with

Local hip-hop group releases song about Johnny Manziel. Nowhere near as oddly thrilling and cringeworthy at Trevor Bauer’s music, though.

PLAIN OLD DAMMIT

Atheist groups put up dozens of billboards in Northeast Ohio. God still mentioned as often as ever during rush hour, proving no atheists in foxholes or on highways.

regional private-sector behemoth FirstEnergy Corp. Right now, CPP enjoys roughly a 10 percent price advantage over FirstEnergy, though even that may be a generous estimate, if you compare bills as closely as Councilman Brian Cummins did. At any rate, that’s evidently nowhere near competitive enough in a landscape where power supply is becoming more expensive, and the ability to negotiate with major commercial customers is key. With Council’s thumbs up, CPP will now be allowed to “levelize” something called the energy adjustment cost (EAC), which

YOUR QUALITY OF LIFE

You didn’t run in the marathon, but you did walk to the new Brewnuts store in Tremont.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

is dependent on the aggregate price of the power supply. Garrett Cole, an engineering consultant for CPP from Georgia-based GDS Associates, says stabilization is important because it makes pricing more reliable for consumers. Plus it’s consistent with municipalities around the country. GDS, after six months of concerted, on-theground analysis and consumer outreach, determined that the two biggest factors that influence customer decision-making are pricing and reliability. Gotta love consultants. Councilman Matt Zone, the only real interrogator at Monday’s meeting, verified that consumption was a lot more indicative of people’s energy bills than fluctuations in the EAC. The CPP folks nodded alon--snoooooore. God, this is so boring. Scene goes to these meetings so you guys don’t have to. Anyway, CPP will also now be able to provide flexible pricing for their biggest clients, presumably so they can offer better deals than competitors and retain what remains of their fickle corporate customer base. Another ordinance will allow CPP to refinance some of their debt obligation. Council Prez Kevin Kelley, after the meeting, said that Cleveland refinances bond issues all the time, so this isn’t really a big deal. Cleveland Public Power (formerly Muny Light) has squandered valuable resources lately, and it’s unclear what effect these new ordinances will have. The city utilities people were very explicit that this business reset would hardly be a “panacea” or “silver bullet.”

digit widget

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

upfront

news At City Council’s meeting of the whole Monday evening, Councilman Zack Reed gave an impassioned monologue about the endurance of “two Clevelands”; one with violence and bloodshed on the streets, the other with chandeliers. Ohio Homecoming founder Alonzo Mitchell was also Mondy’s meeting, along with roughly 50 people he’d asked to come as a birthday present for him.

Warning: This neWs sTory Will Depress your inTellecT The news media machine has set its sights on “trigger warning” policies cropping up at universities of late. In essence, and according to the New York Times, these warnings are “explicit alerts that the material they are about to read or see in a classroom might upset them or, as some students assert, cause symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder in victims of rape or in war veterans.” Frequently, these policies are being brought forth by students themselves. Scene is getting reports that a lot of these student factions also binge-watch Game of Thrones, so… Anyway, students at highminded places like Oberlin, University of California — Santa Barbara, Rutgers, University of Michigan and elsewhere have either formally submitted policy drafts for this kind of stuff or are at least openly discussing the notion. At Oberlin, students published a trigger warning policy in the school’s Sexual Offense Resource

2:12:39 Philip Lagat’s top-ranking Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon time.

Guide that stirred controversy this year. The policy has since been tabled to await further input. “As the resource guide has always stated, the task force values both academic freedom and support for survivors of sexualized violence. We do not see these as contradictory projects, but rather that both are necessary to create an appropriately challenging and effective learning environment,” Meredith Raimondo, associate dean of the College of Arts and Sciences and co-chair of the Sexual Offense Policy Task Force, told Inside Higher Ed. From the policy draft: “Chinua Achebe’s Things Fall Apart is a triumph of literature that everyone in the world should read. However, it may trigger readers who have experienced racism, colonialism, religious persecution, violence, suicide, and more.” All of this controversial back-and-forth was taking place in April at Oberlin, but this week the national press began spotlighting the trigger warning trend all over the country. The wave follows what seems to be a bizarre cultural trend of people demanding intellectual comfort in all areas of life. The educational process is built on a system that, among other things, acquaints students with discomfort in order to sharpen their minds. The world by all accounts is not a completely cheery place. Bad things happen. Literature and even nonfiction narratives are meant to illuminate truths of the greater world, which in turn crafts more critical students who might someday improve the world and eradicate some of its horrors with the power

Number of walk-off home runs in Michael Brantley’s career after Monday night’s joyous win over the A’s

$40

MILLION

Amount of capital improvements required at Pittsburgh’s Heinz Field. The city and the Steelers just negotiated a long-term lease that includes no public tax money. Shoulda, woulda, coulda, Cleveland.

of their education.

Derf enDs 24-year run of comic sTrip ‘The ciTy’ Local cartoonist Derf Backderf published the final installment of “The City” last week, which is a sad note for Scene and other altweeklies around the country that ran the strip off and on for years. Here’s the rationale for the end in his own words: “I’m ending the strip so I can concentrate full-time on graphic novels. It’s all good. I’m not slinking away from a failed endeavor as a washed-up has-been. I’m leaving it behind in a blaze of glory, as a newly minted, internationallybest-selling comix creator. The past couple years have been the best of my career. After 30 years of toil as a (at best) cult favorite to suddenly find success? I’m loving every fucking minute of it! I simply no longer have the time, nor, quite frankly, the desire, to devote to The City. Typically, it takes almost two full workdays to write and draw one strip. That’s time better devoted to other projects.” He promises more work in the future — graphic novels, namely and excitedly — so Derfheads should find a nice silver lining on the other side of their lament. The Scene alum’s satirical strip lampooned everything under the sun and appeared in 174 publications over its lifetime. A Cleveland-centric version ended publication last year when The Plain Dealer shifted to a three-day home delivery model.

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene

Tons of hummus and assorted “dips” recalled by regional Target stores this week.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Facetime

Brian Hill (front), John Delzoppo and Tim Zjaba during last season’s finals. (Photo courtesy of Brian Hill)

king of the silver ball All about nudging, tilting and high scores at the Happy Dog Pinball League

By Doug Brown EvEry TuEsday EvEning during the season, the area’s pinball enthusiasts flock to Detroit-Shoreway for a battle of skill, reflexes and hand-eye coordination and some retro arcade fun at one of Cleveland’s best bars. As the third season of the Happy Dog Pinball League inches closer to the grand finale on June 7, we checked in with Brian Hill, who started the Happy Dog league.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

so you’re in the third season of the league now. How many people are competing in this thing? We’ve got 30 people in the league. There’s a wide range of skill levels represented in Ohio, in general, and in our league, there’s some guys in the top 500 in the world rankings and we have some people who have never played competitive pinball ever in their life. The league’s formatted so that all skill levels are competing against each other: The pros are playing the pros; the newbs are playing the newbs.

What does a good pinball player do? i’m assuming it’s not just rapidly whacking the side buttons like i did when i was a kid. A good pinball player only hits one flipper at a time, stays in control, throws the ball down, catches it, and aims for flashing shots. The strategy gets really deep for higher level players, but there’s easy things for new people to do that can improve their game a lot. i’d love to hear some of this high-level pinball strategy. It’s all about making risky decisions for higher reward and having the skills to execute, which a lot of times involves using special flipper skills like drop catches, post

passes, lane passes and tap passes. There’s a ton of different moves you can do. And it’s just knowing the rules of the game.

Who’s the best pinball player in northeast Ohio? Rankings-wise, it’s John Delzoppo, who plays in the league. He’s my pinball-buddy — we kind of get into it. I think he’s already broken into the top 250 in the world or he’s close to it. What’s John delzoppo like then? John’s a pretty zen player. He sticks his left foot against the left leg of the machine and then he doesn’t move until he has to. On the other hand, we have totally crazy animated players, too. They jump around, kick, slam on the machine. If they lose the ball they’re yelling. You won’t just find one type of person at the league. is there any pinball shittalking? There’s always shit-talking. Around here, it’s pretty friendly, but everyone gets teased and it just makes all of it more fun. There’s always some guys who want to beat other guys, so there can be some grudges that come up after getting beat by the same guy. so what’s happening on June 7th? Along with the Happy Dog Pinball League season three finals, which will be going on all afternoon, we’re also having an open tournament for anybody that wants to play with cash prizes. You’ll be playing on stage, we’ll have a DJ — Party Sweat is going to be there — I think that starts at 9 p.m., and at midnight we’ll determine the

winners, give out prizes, and just play some more pinball.

How long do individual games last? When i’d put my quarters in as a kid, it wouldn’t last too long. It really depends on the game. Like Lord of the Rings can go on for a half hour, 45 minutes, but some games the average time will be like five minutes, three minutes. It’s different for each. so at Happy dog, you’ve got attack From Mars, demolition Man, Tales of the arabian nights, Terminator 2, The simpsons; what’s your favorite one there? Attack From Mars. It’s a combination of the theme, the flow, it has an interesting rule set. It has whatever that magical thing is that makes you want to come back and play one more game. No matter how many times you play it, you just want one more. You keep putting your quarters in because you almost got that high score. Least favorite? My least favorite one is… I don’t know. And I don’t want to give up my weak games to my competitors. is there much variation from machine to machine? Like could someone dominate on one and completely suck on another? Yeah, you’ll hear about flow players versus stop-and-go players. There’s guys who play on-the-fly, where they don’t stop the ball and they’re hitting the ball on reflex every time and there’s certain games that are better for those guys. And then there’s guys who take it slow: They try to stop the ball as much as possible, and there’s games more

conducive to that.

i didn’t realize there were different styles of play. Oh yeah. And nudging is its own art. What’s that? Nudging is moving the machine itself to save the ball from going down the middle or the right or left out lanes. damn, that’s allowed? Yeah, as long as it doesn’t tilt. Generally you get two warnings from the game before it tilts. The third time you move it too much is when it tilts, and you lose your ball and you lose your bonus. As long as it doesn’t tilt, you can do whatever you want. so what’s one thing an average person wouldn’t know about pinball strategy? There’s been a lot of taking advantage of what’s called “valid playfield,” lately. A lot of games, you can plunge the ball and if you don’t hit any switches, you get the ball back. If there’s a skill shot in the game off of the plunge that is worth a lot, you can miss it, lose the ball, and it’ll give you the ball back and you can try and make that shot again. There are just a million things with pinball, and it’s really fun when you start finding out, and you want more people to start finding out. Contact Brian at happydogpinball@ gmail.com to learn more.

dbrown@clevescene.com t @dougbrown8

LAW OFFICE OF DAVID W. REUVEN FREE INITIAL TELEPHONE CONSULTATION

FELONIES, MISDEMEANORS & DUI’S

SERVING INJURY VICTIMS FOR

Struggling with opiate addiction? Stop tHe epiDeMiC affordable treatment is available!

Be FRee FRoM DRUG aDDiCtioN

DISCOVER YOUR SMILE WITH US

OVER 20 YEARS

FROM SET-UP TO LITIGATION

NOW FIGHTING FOR YOU

440-580-4998 Suboxone Clinic West suburbs, 15 mins from Downtown

DR. ROCHELLE M. FRIEDRICH, DDS DR. ELIZABETH J. SANTO, DDS NEW PATIENTS WELCOME

23420 Lorain Road, North Olmsted • 440.734.3232 • www.dental32studio.com

4264 Pearl Rd. 216.749.3440

EASTLAKE

32888 Vine St 440.942.8668

LORAIN

823 Broadway 440.242.4080

MANSFIELD

522 Park Ave West 419.522.1695

STRONGSVILLE 19097 Drake Rd. 440.572.8287

GIRARD

16 N. State St. 330.545.8131

BARBERTON

536 W Tuscarawas 330.753.0500

AKRON

1004 Kenmore Blvd 330.753.3600

SEE OUR AD ON THE BACK INSIDE COVER

LAURENLANZARETTA.COM

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

CLEVELAND

feature Cutline. (Photograph courtesy of Elizabeth Perez)

Elizabeth Perez joins her sons, Ignacio (left) and Marcos (right).

gone daddy gone

Elizabeth Perez served in the Marines, went to college and started a family. Now sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fighting immigration laws after her husband was deported to Mexico.

By Eric Sandy

illegal reentrants with alarming frequency — a 28-fold increase over the past 20 years — leaving stories of families ripped apart from sea to shining sea. Like that of Elizabeth Perez, who understands all too well what Alfredo’s family was thinking about while the federal government held him.

Marcos Perez was an undocumented, Mexican-born immigrant who had been living the U.S. since 1993. But, yes, Elizabeth told the officer, Marcos was her husband, and what exactly is going on here? When asked, she couldn’t offer up her husband’s social security number, which only stoked the officer’s suspicions more. He

“He’s in tHat van,” tHe guard said. “and you’re probably never going to see Him again.” — elizabetH perez

The 35-year-old mother, U.S. Marine vet and recent Cleveland State University graduate was at the rally for Alfredo outside of the Erie County Prison and on the bus back to Cleveland when the crowd received the good news. “That was something I’ll never forget for the rest of my life,” she says. After years of embedding herself within immigration advocacy efforts in Northeast Ohio, Elizabeth couldn’t help but think that maybe she’d get some good news this year too.

June 23, 2010. When the call came, it popped up as “unknown” on her cell phone. Elizabeth Perez was jostled from a nap in her Cleveland Heights home. It was midday, and she was already exhausted. She’d been to the doctor that morning and arrived back home to tell her husband the good news before he left for work: They were going to have a second child. Their first, a three-month-old son, was sleeping nearby when Perez answered the phone. A Mayfield Heights police officer greeted her on the other end; he was inquiring about a man named Marcos Perez whom he had just detained at a traffic stop. En route to one of his two jobs, Marcos had run a yellow light. But Marcos didn’t have the proper identification on him, because he lost his wallet a few days prior, but also because he wouldn’t have the proper identification:

continued to grill her and soon threatened to call ICE. Elizabeth asked the officer not to go down that route and pleaded to speak with her husband. But her cell phone battery died right then — click — and she had no number to call back. “I grabbed my baby and started walking to the police department,” she says. Her car — the car Marcos was driving — had been summarily gutted, she found out when she arrived at the station. The dashboard was ripped out entirely, as were the heating vents. Papers that had been sitting on the passenger seat were ripped into tiny squares. The police never had an answer when she asked why all of that was necessary. Elizabeth says she was advised not to pay bail, as that would have led Marcos directly out of Mayfield Heights custody and into the hands of ICE. So Marcos stayed put for two weeks for running that yellow light. During that time, being rather well versed in English, he listened silently as immigration agents spoke with police, insulting him, his wife and his wife’s father, who was serving as Marcos’ attorney. They called the whole lot of them stupid for thinking they could get away with this while treating Marcos like some big prized catch from a weekend on the ocean, he would later tell his wife. “The whole mentality is that he wasn’t a person,” she says. “The whole time he wasn’t a person; he was just an animal, a piece of garbage off the street. That’s how

they treated him. And the truth is he was in there for running a yellow light. That’s what his charges were.” When Elizabeth arrived on Marcos’ final scheduled day in jail, she waited around for a while and nervously watched the clock tick away. When an immigration hold is placed on someone in custody, a local police department grants ICE a window of opportunity to show up and claim the person in question. Tick tock. Tick tock. Elizabeth held her infant son and thought about her and her husband’s second baby. There had been so much to think about in those past two weeks. Marcos was the sole breadwinner for the family that summer. She simply wanted him home. She held on to hope, resisting the urge to panic, until a prison guard pulled her aside and pointed out the window to an unmarked white van outside. “He’s in that van,” the guard said. “And you’re probably never going to see him again.”

She met him in California in 2009. It was a love story like any other in a way — a quickly blooming romance that proved no obstacle was insurmountable. Their relationship came after Elizabeth finished 10 years in the armed forces, both in the National Guard and the Marines, with deployments in Afghanistan and Japan and work all over the U.S. in between. But after a decade, Elizabeth felt the call of motherhood and the desire for family and ended up in California with her sister. Marcos Perez was working three jobs at the time, filling the days with carpentry, the nights with restaurant service gigs, including at the place where Elizabeth’s sister worked, and the weekends with what Elizabeth calls “oddball construction” work. He kept an active life, one in tune with the outdoors, and in his sense of industry Elizabeth saw a kindred spirit. Besides, he was so kind. She fell hard. It didn’t occur to her then to inquire about Marcos’ legal status, and it wouldn’t have. For one, it’s not like people typically run citizenship checks on their dates. And secondly the mood in California, Elizabeth

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

The good news arrived rather unexpectedly. Most of the people who attended the rally in Erie, Pa., were still on the bus ride back to Cleveland when they heard that Alfredo Ramos-Gallegos had been released from prison. But who would have thought he’d get out so quickly? Relatively speaking, of course. On Feb. 8, 2014, a Mentor police officer flagged a car near Great Lakes Mall. Alfredo RamosGallegos, a passenger, handed over a Mexican voter registration card, which prompted the officer to call in backup of the border patrol ilk. Ramos-Gallegos was arrested and brought under what U.S. Attorney David Hickton once termed “the fast-track policy to expedite handling of criminal immigration cases.” The feds meant business. Hickton charged him with one count of illegal reentry, a felony, because he had already been deported once back in 1999. Chances were good that he’d be deported again, leaving his two children in Mentor living without their father. The 40-year-old immigrant ended up in the Erie County Prison, and as he counted his days behind bars his family and friends energized a local protest movement to address the prosecution of immigrants in the U.S. The gravity of Alfredo’s case was immense and hit home for plenty of other families facing similar circumstances in their own homes. But on March 20 he was set free, and just a few weeks later Hickton himself filed a motion to dismiss the felony charge. Attorneys who were watching the case say Alfredo’s peaceful, tax-paying life, long established here in Northeast Ohio, helped the U.S. attorney use discretion over the law to grant his release. But he is not a free man, in the broader sense, and likely never will be. He was only granted a one-year stay from Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), meaning that next spring he will await word again from the ICE on whether he’s allowed to stay in America. But for now, good news. Things like Alfredo’s turn of fate almost never happen in 2014 America, where there’s a nationwide push for immigration policy reform. President Obama’s tenure has seen some 2 million deportations, and federal prosecutors are charging

75 66 66 100 100 100 80 70 70 100

feature

70 70 40

70 40 40

0000

3.1 2.2 2.2 10.2 7.4 7.4 25 19 19

50 40 40

She gave you a gift card to

40 100

10 40 40

20 70 70

. magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

100 100 60 100 100

70 70

30 30

100 100 60 100 100

70 70

30 30

100 100 60 100 100

70 70

30 30

100 40

On your second date.

says with a tinge of reflection, is a bit different — it’s not something you ask about. Elizabeth and Marcos began building their relationship, and life continued to change around them. Soon they were planning the birth of their first son. The conversation about Marcos’ status occurred in fragments over time. It wasn’t even really clear to either of them what impact, if any, it had on their budding family. “To me, it was like, ‘Oh, well you’re here…,’” Elizabeth says. “It didn’t matter at that point. And it wouldn’t have mattered much in the beginning anyway, because I really liked him from the first day I met him.” Marcos’ legal status rested comfortably on the back burner but the couple planned for the necessary and eventual process, saving up money to get Marcos naturalized. Other legal designations also didn’t matter much to them. They considered themselves “mentally and spiritually married,” Elizabeth says, but, “it wasn’t something that we felt was super important at the time.” They didn’t really know how to go through the marital process with Marcos’ lack of documents but they were together and that’s all that mattered. The couple moved to Cleveland, where Elizabeth’s family roots ran deep and where Cleveland State University held the promise of a

bright future. It took Marcos a long time to find a job, though he did sling burritos at Chipotle for a time — “How stereotypical,” Elizabeth says with a chuckle — and now and then picked up more of those oddball construction gigs. He was on his way to becoming a supervisor at a janitorial company, a promotion that would come in especially handy with two children to support and a partner heading to college. “I wasn’t doing anything bad. You know, as a human, you feel inside your heart when you’re working in the wrong way,” Marcos says via phone from Mexico City. “I felt really good. I had my family and my two jobs. I was going to go to school.” And then Marcos Perez got pulled over on his way to work.

Elizabeth Perez positively beams when she smiles, and she smiles often. Framed by her two energetic sons, Ignacio and Marcos (now 4 and 3), she is an ebullient presence in her living room. And she smiles as she tries to tie Ignacio’s curly, flowing hair into a ponytail, the prospect of which upsets Ignacio greatly. That smile quickly fades away when she talks about Marcos’ departure. The white van pulled out of the Mayfield Heights’ police station parking lot and Elizabeth, in a quite visceral reaction, spat on the floor. Marcos was transported to Bedford municipal jail, then ICE’s Seneca County Jail before being tossed on a flight to deep Texas, where he’d be

Instantly exchange gift cards for cash at any Coinstar Exchange kiosk. Now the thought really counts.

Available at select supermarkets. ©2014 OUTERWALL INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. OUTERWALL AND COINSTAR AND THEIR ASSOCIATED LOGOSARE TRADEMARKS OF OUTERWALL INC. OR ITS SUBSIDIARIES. ALL OTHER NAMES AND LOGOS ARE THE PROPERTY OF THEIR RESPECTIVE OWNERS. THE THIRD PARTIES FEATURED ARE NOT SPONSORS OF OUTERWALL OR ANY OF ITS SUBSIDIARIES OR ANY OF THEIR PRODUCTS OR SERVICES. PLEASE VISIT THE WEBSITES OF EACH THIRD PARTY FOR ADDITIONAL TERMS AND CONDITIONS.

Job Number:

OUTER4008765

Headline:

Pub/Date:

Cleveland Scene

Due Date:

Elizabeth Perez and her sons at home in Northeast Ohio. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

Tiffany’s

Ignacio (left) and his brother Marcos (right) visit their father in Mexico City. (Photo courtesy of Elizabeth Perez)

CLASSES START TUESDAY, JUNE 3 Winter Course SoLD oUT Reserve Your Seat Now!

But simply being together in the meantime wasn’t enough, not when all their money was funneled to lawyers, leaving little left for daily life, and not when Elizabeth battled hunger — real, indescribable hunger — for the first time in her life as a result. She couldn’t keep her kids in that environment for long. And there was the matter of her thyroid, part of which had been removed years before. She needed regular check-ups at the VA hospital and, being a veteran, she thought she and her family deserved to be close to the American systems that had motivated her to devote ten years of her life to serving her country. Her roots were in the United States, after all, and Marcos’ future was on American soil. Two years. Elizabeth returned to Cleveland and began working on her bachelor’s degree in social work at Cleveland State with additional studies in Spanish. She and the kids would spend summers in Mexico City where the family would enjoy brief stretches of normalcy, but once they returned to Northeast Ohio, the stresses of thousands of miles of distance would begin to show. Ignacio experienced frequent night terrors, and though Skype and long-distance calls helped bridge the gap, his anguish was rarely quelled completely. Two years, she’d remind them. Daddy would be home soon. But in the run-up to the November 2012 application interview, Elizabeth stumbled upon a horror tucked in the legal language of her husband’s application. Because he had been deported from the country,

*Cash Discount $100

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE

$53,323 AVERAGE ANNUAL SALARY?

2010 Independent 3rd Party Salary Survey Of Over 3,000 Certified Fitness Professionals (see www.acefitness.org/salary)

• Workload Management • Anatomy & Physiology • Kinesiology • Biomechanics • Metabolic Calculations • Fitness Testing & Evaluations

• Exercise Prescription • Basic Nutrition • Strength & Conditioning • Special Populations • Fitness for Seniors • Weight Loss

CLASSES WILL BE HELD AT FITNESS 19

CLASSES WILL MEET TUES. & THURS. EVENING FROM 8-11PM 3740 Rocky River Drive Cleveland, OH / In Kamms Plaza!

www.fiteacher.com • 216-213-1722 Course Instructors include Sports Physiologists, Doctors, “Cleveland’s Most Renowned Personal Trainers” & other Guest Professional Lecturers

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

ferried to the far side of the Mexican border with no inkling of what to do next. He was still wearing his work clothes from weeks’ prior when he’d been pulled over. He had $17 in cash. With no ID, there was no immediate way to get money wired from Elizabeth back home. Marcos eventually gained the trust of a stranger in that forgotten border town, garnering enough rapport to have Elizabeth send money through the middleman. He made his way to Mexico City, the sprawling political center of a country with which Marcos bore only a passing familiarity. Mexico City, for Marcos, is home to a tangled family history that involves his mother giving him away as a child so many years ago and a father he’s still never met (a lifelong absence that he says now reminds him of his own sons). It’s not his home. But with nowhere else to go, Marcos reestablished himself in the city of nearly 9 million. After a brutal first year with few prospects, he took up work as a soccer referee. Following the birth of their second child in 2011, Elizabeth moved the family to Mexico City. Anything, she thought, to keep them all together. Elizabeth and Marcos became legally married. The longawaited signatures made everything official and with that, the formal visa application process to return to their lives could begin. They were advised it would be about a two-year wait before everything was approved. Two years was manageable. Two years wasn’t that long. The couple poured thousands of dollars into lawyers to help navigate the paperwork.

AS LOW AS $50 A WEEK!*

Share The

DAZZLE! Stop Squinting!

Eyes Examined • Stephen Sasala, OD 800 Huron Road, Downtown Cleveland • (216)781-7900 • www.jeroldoptical.com

RanKed #1 FOR BeST PRICe FOR YOUR GOld In THe nORTHeaST OHIO aRea aS RePORTed BY neWS CHannel 5

visit Us at

www.dewittsjewelry.com

Dewitt’s Jewelers

530 Euclid Ave. #24, Colonial Marketplace • Cleveland • 216.621.6244

• Open Monday-Saturday • Closed on Sundays

row ” Again! HereOpWenein“g G soon in Mentor!

5 OFF

We Support Local Glass Artists

We Are Your Hookah Hook-Up!

With Any Purchase over $25 or more! ONE COUPON PER VISIT!

While supplies last. Valid with coupon only. Must be used by June 12, 2014. MV

WE SMOKE THE COMPETITION

With the neWest, latest and greatest products on the market! “ROLL” ON OVER TO ONE OF OUR CONVENIENT LOCATIONS Coming Akron Mayfield Heights Soon to Mentor! 1091 E. Tallmadge Ave. 5890 Mayfield Rd. 7488

440-683-4298

Mentor Ave.

330-794-7856

www.twistedheadz.net

• DIGITAL SCALES • BIOHAZARD • PURE GLASS • DETOX

WILDBERRY • PAX • E-CIGARETTE • BENT GLASS •

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Celebrating Our 33rd Year!

FORMULA 420 • VAPORIZERS • TOBACCO PIPES • HOOKAHS • QUICK FIX

feature he was ineligible for this particular visa pipeline. The couple, as it happened, had sunk thousands of dollars into inept legal representation and several years of their lives into a path with a dead-end. Marcos went to the interview anyway, because sometimes crazy things happen and because you reach for whatever glimmer of hope you can. It didn’t matter. His application was rejected. He would remain ineligible for a visa until 2020. “We got the money back,” Elizabeth says, referencing the lawyer who led the family astray and the military retirement she was forced to cash out decades too early to pay for the privilege. “But I would have rather gotten the time back. I was having a really hard time mentally. I went into a state that was

In 1992, there were 690 Illegal reentry felony cases prosecuted In the u.s. In 2012, there were 19,463. not good. I had all my hopes in life riding on that; that was the only thing that kept me moving forward. And when that fell through, I just fell into this deep, dark place.”

The March 20, 2014, rally in Erie, Pa., was something proactive Elizabeth could do. After slipping

2.00 OFF

$20.00 PURCHASE WITH COUPON

LET’S HEAR IT FOR LAST NIGHT. EVENT SLIDESHOWS. ONLY AT CLEVESCENE.COM SCENE

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

It’s not unusual for families to be roped along by lawyers who don’t understand immigration law. The issue is sprawling and complex and can hardly serve case-by-case guidelines on the estimated 22 million undocumented immigrants in the U.S., according to 2012 Census data. In Cleveland, the estimates hover around 9,000. There are two general routes to naturalization for undocumented workers: Those already living in the U.S. can return to their home country and initiate a waiting period of up to 10 years. Only then can they apply for a legal return. Non-residents who have never set foot in the U.S. apply for citizenship with sponsorship from a parent,

sibling, or even an employer. That process can take between 2 and 30 years. Waiting periods are measured not only in years but in lifetimes. And the deeper into the labyrinth of immigration law one delves, the more obstacles and qualifications arise. A U.S. citizen, for example, hoping to bring his or her unmarried children into the country faces an average wait time of seven years. For children coming from Mexico in particular, the wait is closer to 21 years. Those timeframes, outlined among dazzling legalese in State Department bulletins, tripped up Elizabeth and Marcos and their first lawyer, who hadn’t realized that those visas are only available to people who have not crossed into the U.S. already. Ergo, Marcos returned to the back of the line to wait until 2020 with other previously deported immigrants. His is a fairly emblematic story of federal and immigration roadblocks. And as time went on, Marcos’ dreams receded further from view. “I want to see my family. Sometimes families, in these kinds of situations, they separate,” Marcos says. “It’s kind of hard to make it work like that.” Four years in, he’s calmer about his station in life these days. But knots of resentment don’t fade easily. At 35 with two kids and an exiled husband, Elizabeth is fiercely aware of the passage of time. When doctors removed part of her thyroid several years ago, they found cancer cells. The news came as a shock and added one more gut-wrenching stressor to the pile of life, the sort of thing that married couples would typically confront together in partnership. But it might be the frightening, lingering possibility of doomed cells that can help her build a case to reunite her family. The Perezes are working on the application for a humanitarian visa, usually reserved for political refugees, as a longshot attempt to bring Marcos home before 2020. As always, Elizabeth is hoping for good news.

Look Beautiful And Professional! Call For Appt. 216.226.8616

Keep your haircut fresh. Groom your nails, polished manicure or natural nails buffed. Color your hair to look younger or top style.

Full service salon for females. check or cash • Free Private Parking • Call for appointment.

“Scene Ads get results. I started a print/digital campaign a couple of months ago. We are pleased with the number of cars sold as a result of our advertising in Scene. Brand awareness to my target audience has worked.”

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

– Steve Fialkowski GM Fiat of Strongsville

feature into depression after her husband’s 2012 visa application was denied, she’d connected with HOLA, a statewide grassroots advocacy group for Latino outreach. As she fought her personal battles, she’d committed herself to understanding the plight of immigrants and identifying real solutions for the people she was meeting. They were good people, after all, like Marcos. Statistics published by the University of Arizona’s National Center for Border Security and Immigration show that most men and women who illegally reenter the U.S. after an initial deportation are just like Marcos Perez: people with promise who contribute to society via taxed employment and community and family involvement. Local immigration attorney David Leopold has a similar characterization of the vast majority of undocumented immigrants and the tenuous position they attempt to hold every single day. “The real problem is not him,” says Leopold. “He would comply with the law like millions of other people if he could. This is a guy who pays his taxes with an ITN number, you know; he doesn’t have a social. He does what he can to comply with the law. The one thing he can’t comply with is the immigration law. He can comply with the tax law, he can comply with the criminal law, he can comply with the law that says you gotta take care of your kids — and that’s both a moral law and a regular law. He does all that, but he can’t for the life of him comply with the immigration law because there’s no way for him to do that.” Men like Marcos walk on increasingly thin ice, and one slip changes their world forever. And while each story is unique, Marcos Perez’s ICE dossier reads familiarly. According to federal records, the biggest increases in deportations over the past five years involve people charged with nothing more severe than a traffic violation. The deportation rate for men and women in Marcos’ shoes quadrupled over time once Obama took office in 2008. The president backs his policy, citing criminals in need of a swift kick out the door. Elizabeth refers to all of

this as the “deportation machine.” “There are people who ought to be prosecuted, no question about it,” Leopold says. “If some dangerous felon or drug dealer or some terrorist is deported and then reenters the U.S., that’s what that law is for.” In 1992, there were 690 illegal reentry felony cases prosecuted in the U.S. In 2012, there were 19,463. The average prison sentence lasts two years, which often comes on top of yet more time lost to the quagmire of naturalization policy. Those stats don’t even include men like Marcos, who aren’t charged with any federal felony before they’re flown to the nearest border. There are families like the Perezes, with one undocumented parent, and there are families with two undocumented parents and there are families with some children who are U.S. citizens and some children who are not U.S. citizens. They each have their own circumstantial roadblocks to cross. “They’re all still here. Something has to give,” Elizabeth says. Her voice takes on a frantic tone when she talks about other families in similar situations. “You can’t just keep deporting and separating all these families. It’s going to have effects on their futures — our futures. Who knows? My sons, when they’re teenagers, they’re going to be angry. I already know this, because all teenagers are angry. But what are they going to be angry about? Are they going to be angry, like, ‘Mom, why didn’t you take us to Mexico?’ Or are they going to be mad at my husband? ‘Dad, why didn’t you cross the border to come be with us?’ They’re not going to be happy. That really tears me apart when I think about that.” Elizabeth diverts her attention making popcorn in the microwave and doing what she can to calm Ignacio and Marcos. With that sort of limitless energy that only toddlers possess, they’ve been wrestling each other for an hour. In between suplexes, the kids pause now and then to watch La Casa de Mickey Mouse, which is blaring on the TV. Elizabeth watches on.

“People hear things and that’s how they justify what’s happening,”

Elizabeth says. Detailed truths don’t sell newspapers. And the real story from the view of the people living this stuff doesn’t make it onto TV. Broad brushstrokes and generic rhetoric fail to capture the nuances of each family. “Then they think that the situation is not as bad, because they just believe what they hear and what

everyone else says, even though it’s not true. That makes them feel that — one — it’s not as bad as it really is and — two — things are justified. Like, ‘Why didn’t they get papers this whole time since they’ve been here?’ Well they can’t get papers! What are you talking about? ‘Oh, they just drain our system.’ They’re not allowed to get subsidies. They can’t get food stamps. They can’t

Visits between father and sons are few and far between. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

get anything! What are you talking about? ‘They take away from our social security.’ They’re not allowed to get social security! They don’t get earned income tax credits, though they pay taxes with ITN numbers. They’re paying into it that way.” She lands, near frenzied now, on a exasperated closing note: “Where are you getting all this information from?” Cleveland political leaders and news outlets have historically pushed the immigrant issue off the table, and quite publicly too. What little coverage the matter picks up is either vitriol from the cartoonish Kevin O’Briens of the world or intimation that it’s not the in city’s interest to welcome outsiders (“I believe in taking care of your own,” Mayor Frank Jackson famously said last year on the topic of immigrants in Cleveland). “People hear things and that’s how they justify what’s happening,” Elizabeth says. She leans back now, reasserts eye contact and admits: “I thought the same stuff before, though.” Before the yellow light and the white van and the border town and

the night terrors. There’s a pretty grim line of demarcation in her family’s life — the sort of gamechanging twist that no one really sees coming when they plan for the future. On one side of the line is a life steeped in sepia. On the other side, where Elizabeth and Marcos now find themselves, is one colored in grays. “This is my country and I love the United States. I don’t want to leave. This is my culture,” Elizabeth says. “I don’t want to ever say anything negative about my country. We have a process here to make things change. That’s what sets us apart from a lot of places. We can make a change, and I feel like a change needs to be made. This is not right. It is not right that elected officials either turn a blind eye to it or they’re just so uneducated about what’s happening to people. As a veteran, I’m not happy with what’s happening. But as an American, I say that we have the opportunity to change things.”

esandy@clevescene.com t @ericsandy

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014 19

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Get out! thu

05/22

C o m e dy

Bobby Black Sheep Bobby Lee is the black sheep of his very Korean family. He was supposed to take over the family clothing store, but instead he played in some bands and decided to become a comedian. His parents often tell him how ugly he is and every girl he brings home hears all about how he ate dog poop when he was a kid. His self-deprecation ranges from the nine long months it took his mustache to grow to the limited expression his eyes have. His stories of awkwardness and compromising situations will have you cracking up. He’ll be here tonight at Hilarities at 8 p.m., with shows running through Saturday. Tickets range from $20 to $25. (Liz Trenholme) 2035 East Fourth St., 216-241-7425, pickwickandfrolic.com. Nightlife

musiC

The Great Outdoors Here’s your excuse to check out

that huge outdoor chandelier recently installed downtown. Playhouse Square invites you to the U.S. Bank Plaza this summer for its bi-weekly event, the Labatt Blue Light Lime Outdoor Concert Series. Beat the heat of rush hour and come have some drinks outside while listening to live music. The series features local acts, and tonight at 5 you can hear the local Zydeco-obsessed “PartyGras” band Mo’ Mojo. Admission to these concerts is free. (Eric Gonzalez) playhousesquare.org. C o m e dy

Mike Check Comedian Mike Lukas hates his alarm clock. It taunts him about how much his life sucks and reminds him of all of the awful things he has to do for the day. Much of his humor revolves around ways he has adapted his laziness to his obligations over the years and the seductive advances of Sealy, his beloved bed. On stage, his tall, gangly figure only adds to the comic value of his funny gestures as he tells his stories. The show starts at 7:30 tonight at the Improv; performances continue through Sunday. Tickets are $15 to $17. (Trenholme) 1148 Main Ave., 216-696-IMPROV, clevelandimprov.com. musiC

Night at the Opera The folks at the Cleveland Orchestra are calling their production of The Cunning Little Vixen the “opera event of the season.” They just might be right. Featuring original animation, the production promises to “plumb the depths of human experience in a charming tale of love, peril, freedom and family.” Sung in Czech with English supertitles, the opera centers on Vixen (Czech soprano Martina Janková) as she tries to find happiness. Tonight’s performance takes place at 8 at Severance Hall with a repeat performance at 2 p.m. on Saturday. Student tickets are $10 ($15 if purchased less than one hour prior to concert start time) and tickets

One of the babes in the B-movie Pig Death Machine. See: Friday.

for the general public start at $35. (Niesel) 11001 Euclid Ave., 216-231-1111, clevelandorchestra.com. t h e at e r

Women’s Rites Constantly on the forefront of promoting women in the arts, Cleveland Public Theatre’s contributions are skillfully displayed in tonight’s debut of Ancestra. Conceived and directed by the masterful Holly Holsinger, Ancestra weaves the historical account of the 1853 National Women’s Rights Convention alongside the deeply personal biography of a contemporary woman. Blending past and present with a multigenerational and multicultural cast, this show offers

the full spectrum of womanhood while celebrating the pioneers of women’s rights in America. The show runs through June 7 in Cleveland Public Theatre’s Gordon Square Theatre. Tonight’s performance takes place at 7:30 and tickets are $12 to $28. (Patrick Stoops) 6415 Detroit Ave., 216-631-2727, cptonline.org.

fri

05/23

food

Barbecue Blowout Memorial Day weekend wouldn’t be Memorial Day weekend without the Marc’s Great American Rib Cook-off & Music Festival. The four-day event

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Cocktails and Conversation Cocktail connoisseurs can mix it up tonight from 6 to 8:30 p.m. at Ohio City’s Speakeasy, with three of the best bartenders in town: Molly McSweeney, vice-president of the local chapter of the United States Bartenders Guild; Lorilei Bailey from the Katz Club Bar Car; and Danina Calame of the Velvet Tango Room. The ladies will be demonstrating and pouring samples of their signature cocktails as part of a fundraiser for the Green Tables Initiative of the local Les Dames d’Escoffier chapter, a professional organization for women in the food, beverage, and related industries. Your $50 ticket gets you three cocktail samples, heavy apps, live music, and a chance to bid on items (plenty of them food and restaurant-related) in the Chinese raffle. Tickets and more info are available online. (Jeff Niesel) 1948 West 25th St., cleveland.ldei.org/events.html.

everything you should do this week

Get out! ThIS Weekend

MIke lUkaS

· comedy central “Premium blend” · “Tonight Show with leno” · a&e’s “Straight dog” · “I am kreme Fillin’”

May 29-June 1

“Uncle” larry reeb

Arts

· “That’s another Tip From your Uncle lar” · nbc’s “last comic Standing” · Voted “chicago’s Top 5 Standup comics” · TbS’s “I Married That Girl”

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

SAMPLE THE BEST OF CLEVELAND’S TOP CHEFS AT THE ROCK HALL!

kicks off today at noon at Jacobs Pavilion at Nautica. Rib cookers from all around the country will set up booths so you can sample their variations on barbecued ribs. Entertainment acts are scheduled for each night too. Tonight, local cover bands Disco Inferno and the Spazmatics offer a “bone-crushing dance party.” Tonight’s admission is only $1 but tickets for tomorrow, Sunday and Monday start at $8. Classic rocker Joan Jett headlines tomorrow, emo rockers Taking Back Sunday play on Sunday and country rockers Blackberry Smoke headline on Monday. (Niesel) 2000 Sycamore St., 216-861-4080, livenation.com.

ABC/XYZ AMP 150 BAC BAR CENTO BARRIO BEACHLAND BALLROOM BON BON B SPOT CHEF JOHN SELLICK (UNIVERSITY HOSPITALS)

CORK AND CLEAVER DANTE DRIFTWOOD RESTUARNTS MAHALLS MARKET GARDEN BREWERY MELT MOXIE PARKVIEW NITE CLUB PIER W RED THE BLACK PIG TREMONT TAP HOUSE URBAN FARMER ZACH BRUELL RESTAURANTS

Can Do The local arts magazine CAN has defied the odds and continued to publish even as other print media outlets have disappeared. The magazine hosts a party tonight at Loren Naji Studio Gallery to celebrate its new summer issue. According to the Facebook announcement for the event, “The Board of Liquor Control raid and events orchestrated to shut the gallery down have not changed this plan.” The event will also celebrate Undercurrents, an exhibit of works by Steve Ehret, Bob Peck and Ron Copeland. Local enforcement officials will be happy to hear that this will be a dry event. The party takes place from 6 to 9 p.m. (Niesel) 2138 West 25th St., 216-621-6644, lorennaji.com. Film

The Fabulous 40s Jazz and cinema are two art forms that developed in tandem, and the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque celebrates this relationship in what’s been dubbed the Double-C JazzFilmFest. This first-ever jazz film series is dedicated to the memory of WCPN’s Jazz Tracks host Bobby Jackson. The series runs until June 21 and serves as a fitting prelude to the Tri-C JazzFest. This week’s 1954

biopic, The Glenn Miller Story, stars James Stewart as the ’40s era jazz trombonist/bandleader. A few famous jazz performers grace the silver screen in the film, including Louis Armstrong and Gene Krupa. The screening features a 35mm archive print and starts at 5:15 tonight and at 5 tomorrow night. Tickets are $9. (Gonzalez) 11141 East Blvd., 216-421-7450, cia.edu. Arts

Greek to Us Indulge in some Mediterranean jubilation this Memorial Day with the 44th annual Tremont Greek Fest. Held at Annunciation Church in Tremont, this four-day celebration has all the Greek food, drink and dance you can handle. An extensive menu of authentic Greek cuisine is available; the food is made from recipes passed down to parishioners from generations ago. The fest includes outdoor eateries and a wine garden as well as entertainment from Greek dancers, musicians and the “Most Interesting Greek Guy in the World.” Festivities run from noon to midnight today, tomorrow and Sunday, and from noon to 9 on Monday. (Gonzalez) tremontgreekfest.com. Film

The Power of Pork Famous for cult movies such as Scumrock, Mod Fuck Explosion and Hippy Porn, director Jon Moritsugu took a decade-long break — during which time he battled a serious case of writer’s block — before returning to the director’s chair for Pig Death Machine. The film’s storyline centers on a shipment of pork that enables a woman to become a genius. The film has camp appeal and has drawn comparisons to the work of B-movie master John Waters. It’s so bad, it’s good, and it’s won awards at some of the underground festivals where it’s shown. It makes its local premiere tonight at 7:30 at the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque and it shows again at 9:30 tomorrow night. Tickets are $9. (Niesel) 11141 East Blvd., 216-421-7450, cia.edu.

SportS

Soul Crushers The Cleveland Gladiators are dominating the Arena Football League, folks. Though the AFL doesn’t have the following of the NFL (yet) the Gladiators are 8-0 and, along with the Arizona Rattlers, are the only undefeated team in the country. Gladiator, of course, is now available instantly on Netflix, so it’s reasonable to assume the team has been channeling Maximus in a pretty regular way. Tonight, they take on the Philadelphia Soul at the Quicken Loans Arena. With a 50-yard field, look for lots of touchdowns, athletic interceptions and crazy trick plays. Tickets starts at $10 — incredible bang for your buck. (Sam Allard) 1 Center Ct., 216-420-2000, theqarena.com. Film

You Don’t Know Dick Talk show host Dick Cavett originally set out to become a magician but instead gravitated toward TV, becoming a morning show host in 1968 and then moving over to late night in the 1970s. A multi-faceted performer, he’s been in Broadway plays and won Emmy Awards for his work on TV. Tonight and tomorrow night at 8 at Nighttown, he’ll read from his new book, Talk Show. Comedian Eddie Brill opens the show, and tickets are $40. (Niesel) 12387 Cedar Rd., Cleveland Heights, 216-795-0550, nighttowncleveland.com.

05/24

Food

Farmers Market Spring is finally here and the North Union Farmer’s Market is back for its 10th season at Crocker Park. A wide array of vendors will be on hand selling everything from local, organic produce and meats to honey, preserves and baked goods. You can also purchase plants you can take home to start your own organic garden. This year’s new location is across from Dick’s Sporting Goods. Hours are 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. and the market takes place every Saturday through

Film

International Espionage Two of the most iconic James Bond characters of all time — the aptly named Pussy Galore and hat-hurling bad-guy sidekick Oddjob — appear in Goldfinger, screening tonight and tomorrow at the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque. It’s the film’s 50th anniversary, which means that Sean Connery (who plays Agent 007) is really, really old. Goldfinger is the third in the Bond saga, following Dr. No (1962) and From Russia with Love (1963). Precious metals magnate Auric Goldfinger seeks global domination via the disruption of the American gold supply at Fort Knox in this oh-so’60s tale of international espionage. Tickets are $9 for tonight’s 9:15 screening. Same for tomorrow at 7:15. (Allard) 11141 East Blvd., 216-421-7450, cia.edu. C o m e dy

Local Humor Cleveland’s comedy scene is growing. Apart from creating comedic greats like Drew Carey and Dave Hill, the underground scene is quickly producing solid comedians with unique life perspectives. The Chucklefck comedy shows are at the forefront of this intentionally hilarious movement. For $6 tonight at Reddstone, you can check out some of Cleveland’s funnier assets in this five-comedian-deep line-up. While most of these comedians are still early in their careers, they’re more than capable of creating a night full of laughs. The bar upstairs opens at 9 and the show starts at 10 with $5 burgers, pizzas and wings and drink specials. (Stoops) 1261 West 76th St., 216-651-6969, reddstonecleveland.com. ArtS

Wade the Day Away For the first time ever, you can come to Wade Oval and get into the Cleveland Botanical Garden, Museum of Natural History and Western Reserve Historical Society for free. Since the Art

Twilight_Scene_May2FINAL.indd 1

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

sat

December. (Trenholme) 143 Crocker Park Blvd., Westlake, crockerpark.com.

23 5/2/2014 9:41:46 AM

Get out!

ON SAL

NOW!

Museum normally has free general admission, they are offering free tickets to the hugely popular Van Gogh exhibit for the first 500 visitors. This Cleveland Foundation Day is designed to celebrate the collective support these gems of Cleveland have received over the past 100 years. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. (Trenholme) 11150 East Blvd., 216-421-7350, clevelandart.org.

sun 05/25 Arts

WESTBETH ENTERTAINMENT

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

PRESENTS

Ladies Night Guide to Kulchur, fast becoming a hub for hypnotically unusual events on Cleveland’s west side, hosts WOMYN at 6:30 this evening. WOMYN is a monthly collaboration with She Speaks Collective to offer a “women-centric reading experience.” The goal, according to their literature, is to create a movement of those willing to confront both themselves and the issues women face today. As with most of the G2K events, it’s free, open to the public and BYOB. It’ll start with an open mic followed by three featured readers — women with impressive national writing credentials. Though men are free to attend in support, there will be a women-only forum after the readings on the subject of accountability. (Allard) 1386 West 65th St., 216-314-4644, facebook.com/ guidetokulchurcleveland. Film

Lear Here One of Shakespeare’s most heartwrenching tragedies, King Lear finds a king who wants to distribute his land among his three daughters, with portions depending upon which of them praises him most eloquently. Lear is one of those roles that old British actors get huge boners for the chance to play, and this time it’s Simon Russell Beale, a guy whose name you don’t know, but whose face you’d probably recognize. Sam Mendes (Skyfall) directs this

classic, which is brought to you this evening at the Cedar Lee at 7 p.m. Be forewarned: It’s three-and-a-halfhours long, but it’s live theater (sort of), so enjoy. Tix are $20 (which is only like $3 more than an IMAX 3-D movie at Crocker, so don’t get all indignant). (Allard) 2163 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, 440-717-4696, clevelandcinemas.com. NightliFe

Shake It Down Probably the best way to kickstart the week is by shaking your ass uncontrollably at Shake It Down, B-Side’s bitchin’ Sunday night electronic shows. DJs Eso and Corey Grand join forces to spin anything and everything: funk, soul, hip-hop, trap, drum and bass, and all sorts of similarly ill shit. Grand’s cred speaks for itself: “Sucka Free Since ’88.” And that same sentiment goes for the Sunday-night throwdown as a whole. Work your way across Coventry all weekend and wrap up the party at B-Side. The DJs start spinning at 10 p.m. (Eric Sandy) 2785 Euclid Heights Blvd., Cleveland Heights, 216-932-1966, bsideliquorlounge.com.

mon 05/26 C o m e dy

Another Manic Monday Keeping the indie comedy scene alive downtown, Liquid is now hosting Manic Mondays. Put on by Chucklefck, the guys who bring you about 80 percent of Cleveland’s comedy, this show features regulars Ramon Rivas, Brian Kenny, Mary Santora and Robbie Bourne with a host of other acts both local and out-of-towners. Tonight, the bar opens at 8 and the show starts at 9:30. Admission is free and the club will offer halfoff drink specials. We can’t think of a better way to start the week. (Stoops) 1212 West Sixth St., 216-479-7717, liquidcleveland.com. NightliFe

Trivia Pursuits Do you have tons of obscure music knowledge? Are you a student of fast food menus and their nuanced histories? What say you about the geographic evolution

Xtreme AC/DC

The Ultimate EAGLES Experience

LIMELIGHT

A Tribute To RUSH

w/JUKE BOX HEROES

PRESENTED BY

w/HEY MONEA!

▼

w/MONICA ROBINS & THE WHISKEY KINGS

JUNE 27

JULY 4

ZOSO

The Ultimate Led Zepplin Experience

w/HUMAN NATURE

DRAW THE LINE

▼

7 BRIDGES

JUNE 6

The Only Endorsed Aerosmith Tribute Band

BATTERY

Masters Of Metallica

w/SCHOOLGIRL CRUSH

HEAD GAMES

w/ALMOST FAMOUS

w/VELVET SHAKE

JULY 11

JUNE 20

Foreigner Tribute Band

▼

DIRTY DEEDS USA

MAY 30

▼

MAY 23

▼

FREE ADMISSION & PARKING

▼

MORE INFO?

JULY 25

ELEVATION

International U2 Tribute

w/THE JUKE HOUNDS

ALSO ROCKIN’ AUGUST 1 • GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS w/THAT 80’s BAND AUGUST 8 • ESCAPE The Journey Tribute w/STRAIGHT ON AUGUST 15 • HOLLYWOOD NIGHTS w/JD EICHER & THE GOODNIGHTS AUGUST 22 • VICIOUS CYCLE BAND w/BUTCH ARMSTRONG AUGUST 29 • BUCK NAKED BAND w/Coalies Run Band

www.rockinontheriver.com

Get out! of Scotch whisky? Tonight’s your chance to wow your friends, make yourself instantly more desirable to someone you’re newly dating, and hang with Cleveland’s headiest hipsters and hot dog lovers. It’s the Happy Dog Monday night trivia. Starting at 8 p.m., expect themed rounds — it’s a crap shot — and general knowledge questions that seem considerably trickier than some of the other live trivia locales in town. Obviously, have a hot dog and a craft brew while you’re at it. And arrive early. The tables fill up quickly. (Allard) 5801 Detroit Ave., 216-651-9474, happydogcleveland.com. Food

Vegan Mondays If you’re vegan, vegetarian, gluten free, or just plain interested in trying something new, head over to Townhall in Ohio City this evening from 5 to 10 p.m. for Vegan Night. Work your way through the delicious and healthy vegan menu,

featuring hits like Veggie Vegan Flatbread (think fresh tomatoes, chiles, mushrooms and vegan cheese), Tofu Etouffee (blackened tofu, onions, tomatoes and brown rice) or many of the regular menu items made vegan (we recommend the Thai Bowl). If you’re still feeling skeptical, know this: Monday night is also Craft Beer Night and all 36-ounce drafts are just $3. (Alaina McConnell) 1909 West 25th St., 216-344-9400, townhallohiocity.com.

tue

05/27

NightliFe

Blast from the Past The first visible light in the universe is known as the Cosmic Microwave Background. Understanding CMB has helped scientists comprehend the nature of the universe. And yet, there are “unexplained peculiarities that do not fit within the currently accepted paradigm.” In her talk Known Unknowns of the Early Universe, Amanda Yoho, a Ph.D candidate in Case Western Reserve University’s theoretical astrophysics and

maurice hines is

tappin’ thru life

cosmology department, will talk Life, the Universe and Hot Dogs. Admission is free. (Niesel) 5801 Detroit Ave., 216-651-9474, happydogcleveland.com. Film

Blues Provider Morgan Freeman narrates The Life of Riley, a new documentary about blues guitarist B.B. King that includes interviews with King along with vintage footage of performances. An orphan boy from the Mississippi Delta, King would have a huge influence on rock and pop music. U2’s Bono, Eric Clapton, Carlos Santana, Ringo Starr and many others talk about how much they thought of him as an influence. The film screens tonight at 7:30 at Tower City Cinemas. Tickets are $9. (Niesel) 230 West Huron Rd., 216-621-1374, clevelandcinemas.com. C o m e dy

Good for a Chuckle Reddstone, Chucklefck’s Tuesdaynight hideout, is one of Cleveland’s terrific little incubators of humor.

“...near-perfect tribute to his rich

“It’s been cool to see that kinda develop and congeal over the years,” Chucklefck emcee Ramon Rivas told Scene in 2013. The openmic celebration of local comedy has gathered fans across the region in recent years. And each week, the room gets packed with youthful hordes thirsty for the type of interaction that only a comedian can provide. “There’s a young nucleus of people who are all at the open mics,” Rivas says. “You need those rooms to be able to go and develop that new stuff.” Reddstone and the Chucklefck following take care of that with deft skill. The comedy starts at 8 p.m. (Sandy) 1261 West 76th St., 216-651-6969, reddstonecleveland.com. Film

High Drama This summer you can see any number of superhero and monster movies in digital 3-D. Leave it to the folks at the Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque to provide an alternative to Captain America and Godzilla. Tonight at 7 at the Capitol Theatre, they present a special screening of Charlie

”

and rhythmic life... Seriously good.

— atlanta journal-constitution

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

written by and starring Maurice Hines | directed by Jeff calHoun

maY 30 - jun 29 ALLEN THEATRE

“ It is a fun night of song, dance and, perhaps most importantly, class.”

— theatremania.com

216.241.6000 | clevelandplayhouse.com | sTudenT TIcKeTs JusT $15 |

Victor Romeo, an experimental movie that features reenactments of black-box recordings from six real-life airline emergencies. The New York Times has called it a “curious hybrid of documentary and experimental theater.” Tickets are $10 and the price includes 3-D glasses. (Niesel) 1390 West 65th St., 216-651-7295, clevelandcinemas.com. Arts

Quiet Crisis Averted The Civic Commons will host a talk this evening at the Cuyahoga County Public Library on Snow Road in Parma which will serve as an update to the “Quiet Crisis” series that ran in the Plain Dealer more than a decade ago. Spearheaded by former Plain Dealer chief editorial writer Joe Frolik, the series focused on the economic struggles crippling Northeast Ohio: a failing school system, corruption, sprawl, and more. Frolik will sit on the panel this evening along with Karen Gahl-Mills, the executive director for Cuyahoga Arts and Culture; developer Ari Maron; Quentin McCorvey Sr. of the Cleveland/ Cuyahoga County Workforce Investment Board and Brad Whitehead, president of the Fund for Our Economic Future. They’ll let us know if we’re in better or worse shape than we were at the dawn of the new millenium. Talk is from 5 to 7 p.m. and is free and open to the public. (Allard) 2121 Snow Rd., Parma, 216-661-4240, cuyahogalibrary.org. Nightlife

wed 05/28 C o m e dy

All-In Comedy Tour The so-called “Unholy Trinity of Laughs” is coming tonight in the form of the Monday Morning Podcast Tour. Bill Burr picked his three favorite comedians — Joe Bartnick, Paul Virzi and Jason Lawhead — and put them together on stage to form a powerful trio of laughs. Native Clevelander Jason Lawhead falls short in everything from favorite sports teams to finances and relationships, and his failures fuel his humor. Big Apple native Paul Virzi is a family guy whose humor often revolves around his kids and wife and the ways he uses them for his own gain, while Joe Bartnick veers into political and social territory most would be afraid to even mention. Tonight’s show starts at 8 at Hilarities and runs through Sunday. Tickets range from $20 to $23. (Trenholme) 2035 East Fourth St., 216-241-7425, pickwickandfrolic.com. food

Walnut Wednesday Walnut Wednesday returns to Perk Plaza at Chester Commons, at the intersection of Walnut Avenue and East 12th Street. The 2014 Walnut Wednesday season — its fourth — runs each week through Wednesday, September 24. Food from more than a dozen of Cleveland’s best-known food trucks will be available from 11 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Live music also will be featured each week. On tap this season are Barrio Tacos, Fired Up, Krav, Nosh Box, Zydeco Bistro, Wok ’n’ Roll and Streat Mobile, to name just a few. (Douglas Trattner) downtowncleveland.com.

join the

revolution ALL PIERCINGS ABOVE THE WAIST

$ $

15 20

MENTOR ONLY ALL OTHER LOCATIONS

WITH THIS AD.

ELYRIA NOW OPEN! 720 CLEVELAND ST. 440.365-9800

Q UA L I T Y TAT T O O S + P R O F E S S I O N A L P I E R C I N G S @ G R E AT P R I C E S !

SHOWTIMES Thursday: 8:00PM Friday: 8:00PM & 10:15PM

Saturday: 8:00PM & 10:15PM Sunday: 8:00PM

TICKETS ON SALE STARTING AT $13* FOR TICKETS, VISIT TICKETMASTER.COM OR THE ROCKSINO BOX OFFICE FROM 1:00PM - 9:00PM DAILY.

comics as seen on hbo, comedy central and e! DON DC CURRY

ANDY WOODHULL

MAY 22 - MAY 25

MAY 29 - JUNE 1

PETE GEORGE

CARLOS MENCIA

JUNE 5 - JUNE 8

JUNE 12 - JUNE 14

* NOT INCLUDING TAXES AND FEES

10777 Northfield Road | Northfield, Ohio 44067 | 330.908.7625 | hrrocksinonorthfieldpark.com

The only calendar you need. t @cleveland_scene

facebook.com/hrrocksinonp | twitter.com/hrrocksinonp FOR FREE, CONFIDENTIAL HELP 24/7, CALL THE OHIO RESPONSIBLE GAMING HELPLINE AT 1.800.589.9966. ©2014 Hard Rock International (USA), Inc. All rights reserved.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Trivia Tuesdays How do you spend your Tuesday nights? If you’re not at Nano Brew in Ohio City, you’re definitely missing out. This friendly neighborhood brewpub hosts weekly trivia nights from 8 to 10 p.m. Grab some friends and head on down for a little brainstimulating trivia, freshly brewed craft beer and some seriously stellar bar grub — we recommend the Macro Fries and the Fine American Sandwich. Better yet, bike on over. The folks at Nano Brew love bikes almost as much as they love beer, and they’re happy to share that love by giving you half

off your first drink when they see your bike helmet. (McConnell) 1859 West 25th St., 216-862-6631, nanobrewcleveland.com.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

NEW SALES EVERYDAY!

review Black writing white stage

A character who is an African-American playwright has problems writing for white chicks in This is Not the Play By Christine Howey

PITS tries to solve the problem by plopping another character onto her stage brain, White Girl 2, who is supposed to be Indigo’s lover. But that doesn’t go very well since Indigo isn’t into gals. Pretty soon the girls go on strike, so PITS’ literary agent (a slickly irritating Bobby Coyne) shows up to comment on the proceedings and channel the characters into a salable if clichéd story. The first half hour of this 70-minute piece is fascinating, as it explores stereotypes with wry humor (“What is it about white girls and horses?”). But the streamlined script goes pear-shaped in the second half when White Girl 2’s mother (Laura Starnik) arrives on the scene. After venting some typical mother-daughter tension, mom starts quoting from a couple essays her daughter wrote in college. And a play that seemed fresh and invigorating at the outset suddenly becomes fuzzy and pedantic. This situation isn’t helped much when PITS lands on stage herself, an unnecessary move since she was already a controlling presence in her unseen state. Katrice Headd handles her role as the playwright well. But the unquestioned power and weird vulnerability of the playwright as a character is oddly undermined when she becomes just another person wandering around with her fictional or conjured creations. The two White Girls, played by Rebecca Frick (1) and Jessica

how would she say, ‘Um, like?’ (Photo by Steve Wagner)

Annunziata (2) never feel entirely fleshed out. This is because they are left unfinished — intentionally or otherwise — by Hutchinson, and then aren’t embellished as well as they might be by the actors and director Emily Ritger. Ritger choreographs the characters well within the small playing space. But by initially having PITS’ voice come out of four different speakers from four corners of the theater, it isn’t clear that this is just one omnipresent person and not four. That adds unnecessary confusion at the start. This short play feels like a work in progress: It presents some compelling reflections about racial prejudices as well as the creative process, but doesn’t fully explore

either. This shortfall is evidenced with brutal clarity in the ending, which is abrupt and essentially a copout by playwright Hutchinson. It is ironic that, in a play arranged around a playwright’s inability to relate to and control her characters as well as her own thoughts, the real playwright shies away from some of the hard truths on which she touches.

this is not the play Through May 31 at Cleveland Public Theatre, 6415 Detroit Ave., 216-631-2727, cptonline.org.

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

EvEn though thE u.S. Supreme Court seems to think we live in a post-racial society, one where there is no longer any race-based prejudice, the facts and Donald Sterling seem to suggest otherwise. And racial stereotyping is front and center in This is Not the Play by Chisa Hutchinson, now at Cleveland Public Theatre. The format is quite inventive. It begins with a young woman (White Girl 1) on a cluttered stage talking to an unseen person, who we soon learn is the playwright. And the woman on stage is a character the playwright is developing amid the bits and pieces of memory and perception piled up in her own brain. At first, White Girl 1 (named Indigo by the playwright) seems to acquiesce to the writer’s intentions. But in a process all too familiar to writers who have crafted fictional characters, Indigo quickly evolves past the “cute and quirky” gal she’s intended to be and develops a mind of her own. Indeed, the playwright (let’s call her PITS for Playwright-InThe-Story, to differentiate her from Hutchinson, the playwright of the play) is bored with this white chick she’s fashioned and says she wants Indigo to have a lesbian love interest “to keep me from falling asleep.” And then Indigo realizes that her creator is an African-American woman (as is Hutchinson) who is having trouble writing for her white character, and racial issues begin to emerge.

Looks Like

ART

Feels Like

FUN!

No Experience Necessary! BYOB!

2-Hour Classes: $35 per person 3-Hour Classes: $45 per person

Paintingwithatwist.com/avon (440) 281-5728

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

36840 Detroit Rd Old Avon Village • Avon, Ohio 44011

Someday iS Now: The arT of CoriTa KeNT JUN 27-AUG 31, 2014

Learn More at Mocacleveland.org 11400 Euclid Avenue, Cleveland, Ohio 44106

experience pop activisM! FundEd in pArt by: Skylight FinAnCiAl grOup, thE Andy WArhOl FOundAtiOn FOr thE ViSuAl ArtS, JOhn p. Murphy FOundAtiOn, priCEWAtErhOuSECOOpErS llp And thOMpSOn hinE llp

phOtO: COurtESy OF thE tAng MuSEuM At SkidMOrE COllEgE And COritA Art CEntEr, lOS AngElES

30 MOCA-Ad-Scene-CoritaKent-Halfpage.indd 1

5/20/14 11:56 AM

art

interview

unseen Meet the sculptor who’s devoted a third of his life to making art he’s allowed very few to see By Joseph Clark

an actual human being who did it,” Kinchy says. Realizing the possibility of making something profound and immortal steeled Kinchy to his own career sculpting. Today, about a dozen clay figures line the walls of his home’s foyer-studio. In “Death of the Steel Driver,” folk hero John Henry makes a gesture like a bow as he clutches his failing heart. “Sermon” presents a towering, brooding man raising a hand in sad chastisement. The flaming-haired man who is “A Lonely Star” swoons as if in grief. Struggle unites all of Kinchy’s figures. He wants to make art that connects with audiences by depicting the strains of intolerable hardship, which he believes all viewers recognize. “Buddhists believe that life is suffering, but we’re still happy we’re here. Even if you don’t know anything about art, you’ve suffered,” Kinchy says. Kinchy doesn’t display because he doesn’t think his works are done. His clay sculptures, however detailed and haunting they are, are only prototypes for bronzes Kinchy hopes to cast. Displaying them seems to Kinchy a disservice. “It’s almost like showing sketches of a painting, [or] like going to a concert where a violinist hands out sheet music and just leaves,” Kinchy says. For him, the alloy is alive like no other material. “There’s a fluidity to it. There’s a warmth you don’t quite get in stone, unless you’re very good with stone,” he says. In 2010, a local foundry gave

Kinchy an estimate for the cost of molding and casting his statues. The smallest piece — about 2-foot tall — would be about $1,900, and the largest — 7-foot tall — would cost $25,000. Given inflation, both those figures are doubtlessly higher now. Kinchy, who works odd jobs — construction, house painting, graphic design commissions — has never been able to save up what he needs. Besides economics, Kinchy is trudging against a plurality of the art world’s tastes. He learned this when he took his first and only sculpture class at the University of Akron, where instructors embraced anti-representational trends prevalent in contemporary academic art. Kinchy’s sculpture teacher told his class that they could make anything they wanted, except a figure. Kinchy made figures anyway. “She basically told me she would give me a D-minus as long as I never took a class with her again,” Kinchy says. Even the artist’s own materials have proven unreliable collaborators. Like any big object, Kinchy’s sculptures strain under gravity. The clay he uses cracks under its weight and can get dangerously soft in summer heat. By Kinchy’s estimation, the figures standing in his studio represent only about half of the works he’s completed. The rest, despite his diligent maintenance, have fallen apart. “It breaks my heart,” Kinchy says. However, this summer might finally offer Kinchy something other than more ruined sculptures. Last year, a mutual friend introduced

Kinchy to Joe Ayala and Daniel Neforos, respectively the former and current gallery directors with the Cleveland West Arts League. Visiting his studio, the two immediately became advocates. “I was taken aback by how unbelievably beautiful and professional these works are. I was just at a loss for words,” says Ayala. “One thing I could say to him was, ‘How have you never shown? You’ve got to get this out there.’” This March, Ayala and Neforos invited a handful of Cleveland art scene personalities (the author included) to an “open studio” in Kinchy’s home-workspace. They’ve introduced him to another curator, scouted exhibit locations and nudged him into submitting clay figures or drawings for exhibition. “I told him he has to have an open mind if you want to get your name out there. You’ve got to start with something. We can do whatever we can for him, but it’s up to him to take the advice we give him and push it forward,” Ayala says. Kinchy says he’s coming around to displaying his drawings and illustrations, and recently put up his first online portfolio at traviskinchy. com. Despite all the work behind him, these are only first steps along a long and rough route ahead. But Kinchy doesn’t think himself alone on that course. “I’m not sure if an artist has to suffer for their art, but it seems everyone does,” Kinchy says.

scene@clevescene.com t @clarkjosephf

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Struggle defineS not only the content of Travis Kinchy’s work, but also the circumstances that produced it. The 32-year-old artist has worked without acclaim, without publicity and without constructive criticism from his peers. Those who have seen his art have only done so through personal invitations to the artist’s home or iPhone photos circulated by a small circle of supporters. The sculptures into which he has poured a third of his life have never been exhibited. Yet he sculpts, because there is no other vocation for him. “I can’t stop. If I could, I would have years ago and my life would have been so much easier. But that’s not what I have ever wanted. I’m an artist,” he says. When he was 20, Kinchy ditched studying at the Netherlands’ Utrecht School of Arts for firsthand knowledge of Europe’s museums. At the Louvre and Accademia di Belle Arti Firenze, he stood for the first time front of the works of Michelangelo. He found them more worldly than he expected. He saw the legendary “David,” wreathed in scaffolding and dusted in cobwebs. In the writhing marble form of the “Dying Slave,” he saw centuries-old chisel marks. Seeing these imperfections and marks of the endless workaday activities that made statues was an epiphany for Kinchy. The objects disclosed themselves as things shaped by a man’s skill, not untouchable Platonic forms. “Dying Slave” taught Kinchy even divine icons are still things which people make. “It’s a photograph in stone of

A rare glimpse at Travis Kinchy’s work. (Photo by Joseph Clark)

THE MOVIE THE FOOD INDUSTRY DOESN’T WANT YOU TO SEE

WANTED A SPECIAL ADVANCE SCREENING Tuesday, May 27 7:30PM Regal Richmond Town Square

Text the words WILD WEST and your Zip Code to 43549 for your chance to win an admit-two pass! Entry Deadline: Monday, May 26 at Noon. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. This film is rated R. Readers must be at least 17 years old to enter this contest. There is no charge to text 43KIX (43549). Message and data rates may apply. Text HELP for info, STOP to quit. Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy: 43KIX.com/terms. Late and/or duplicate entries will not be considered. Limit one entry per cell phone. While supplies last. Passes do NOT guarantee admission. Winners will be drawn at random and notified via text message with screening details by 5/26 at 5PM. Each mobile pass admits 2.

IN THEATERS MAY 30

WEDNESDAY, MAY 28 AT 7:00PM AT CINEMARK STRONGSVILLE

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

INVITE YOU TO A SPECIAL 3D ADVANCE SCREENING

BY FRIDAY, MAY 23 AT 3PM, VISIT tinyurl.com/l9cp4cf FOR YOUR CHANCE TO WIN AN ADMIT-TWO PASS.

A random drawing of all entries will be held to award screening passes. Winners will receive instructions via email. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. Limit one (1) admit-two pass per person. This film is rated PG. Must be 13 years of age or older to receive pass. Employees of all promotional partners and their agencies are not eligible. Void where prohibited. Seating is first-come, first-serve basis. SEATING IS LIMITED, SO ARRIVE EARLY. PASS DOES NOT GUARANTEE A SEAT AT THE SCREENING.

disney.com/Maleficent | facebook.com/DisneyMaleficent | Twitter.com/Maleficent | #Maleficent

CLEVELAND SCENE

THE NEW YORK TIMES

Find your happy hour.

Download SCENE’s official happy hour app today!

“EYE-OPENING. PULLS NO PUNCHES IN ITS INFORMED OUTRAGE.” LOS ANGELES TIMES

FROM LAURIE DAVID PRODUCER OF AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH AND KATIE COURIC

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT

NOW PLAYING CLEVELAND CINEMAS

CEDAR LEE CEDAR & LEE RDS - 440-528-0355

CHECK DIRECTORIES FOR SHOWTIMES • NO PASSES ACCEPTED

CLEVELAND SCENE

CLEVELAND SCENE WEDNESDAY, MAY 21 4.42x5.42

“THE MOST IMPORTANT MOVIE TO BE MADE SINCE ‘AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH’.”

WEDNESDAY 05/21 1/8 PAGE V. ( 2.13” ) X 5.42” ALL.FUP.0521.CSEmail

movies

this week

spotlIght

also openIng

healing place where she realizes she’s okay being a woman of color in an aristocratic society,” says Asante. “I also had to bring gender and class and race and those parallels into the film. At what point do you get that political awakening? Is it political with a small ‘p’ or Political with a large ‘P?’ And how could I show Dido in a way that wouldn’t make you irritated with her? She wasn’t just privileged as far as people of color are concerned. She was privileged as far as most people are concerned. How could I make it so she wasn’t asking for more, but she was asking for equality and for a right that would resonate with all of us? I dug deep into those themes. I’m a thematic storyteller and a thematic filmmaker. For me, that was the process of research and bringing it to screen.” But first and foremost, the film is a story about how true love can beat the toughest odds. “I’m an irrepressible romantic,” says Asante. “I felt like I had permission to hang my hook on a big romantic love story. For the film’s love story, I wanted to pay homage to the love of my life in the same way that I wanted to pay homage to the paternal love story with my father. I wanted audiences to see that he falls in love with her internal before the external.”

“If you overlook the fact that It’s a really bad movie,” my girlfriend opined, as we let Blended listlessly digest, “it’s much easier to enjoy.” Amen to that. Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore prove that the third time isn’t necessarily the charm as they reunite in this culturally indelicate rom-com with a few surprising moments of tenderness scattered among the cliched tampon-and-semen stuff of which Sandler is master and commander. It opens Friday at theaters everywhere. In Blended, Sandler and Barrymore are single parents; he’s a widower named Jim with three girls whom he’s outfitted in his own image. As a manager of the local Dick’s franchise, Jim has his daughters wearing tracksuits and sporting Prince Valiant haircuts. Barrymore’s a divorcee named Lauren with two over-the-top boys — one throws tantrums and sets things on fire and the other is a godawful actor who does little but tape the face of his babysitter on nudie centerfolds and whine. After a botched blind date at Hooters (nothing if not a Sandler touchstone), Jim and Lauren and their respective broods find themselves at a South African resort — fortune has intervened to bring them there — for a “blended” getaway designed for new families. The resort is everything you hate about the West’s appropriation of Africa, in which the native scenery and culture become literal props. What’s that? Rhinos humping? Hilarious!!! Terry Crews roams the premises as a sort of aphrodisiac MC, thrusting his pelvis and popping his pecs while a chorus of singing locals, many of them seniors, harmonize in multi-colored T-shirts behind him, just to give you an idea. What’s sad is that Sandler and Barrymore really do have a natural chemistry after years of working together. A few touching scenes get at the awkwardness and uncertainty of new romance when kids are involved, even if the narrative formula is so blandly predictable you know every beat 15 minutes before it arrives. With less outrageous trappings and fewer of the boob gags that come with Sandler’s producing territory, this one might have been more than just bright spots on an otherwise desolate Savannah. — Sam Allard

— Jeff Niesel

Chef Jon Favreau directed, wrote, co-produced and stars in this comedy depicting a Miami chef (Favreau) who was fired from his restaurant job and seeks success as the operator of a food truck in L.A. Opens Friday at the Cedar Lee Theatre.

The Immigrant Set in the 1920s, this film centers on a traumatized young woman and her sister who sail from their native Poland to New York in search of a new beginning and the American dream. Opens Friday at the Cedar Lee Theatre.

X-Men: Days of Future Past The seventh film in the X-Men series contains a star-studded cast portraying mutants who wish to change the past and save the future. Opens Friday areawide.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

a perIod pIece aBout a woman of mixed race who grew up during a time when slavery was legal, Belle opens on Friday at the Cedar Lee Theatre. But it represents the personal struggles that director Amma Asante, whose father was West African, experienced while growing up in England. “We were one of two black families on our street in London,” she says. “The equivalent of the Ku Klux Klan would have their meetings at the end of our street at their headquarters; they were called the National Front. You could get bottles thrown at you when you were walking home. We were little girls walking home from school and we would be surrounded by ‘big boys,’ as I liked to call them, who would use very racist language. That was just life and my dad wanted to instill something in me that would allow to me to cope outside the front door.” Asante says the film’s protagonist Dido (Gugu Mbatha-Raw), who is of mixed race, had a similar struggle. Raised by her father’s uncle, Lord Mansfield (Tom Wilkinson), Dido finds herself in the midst of controversy. Much to her uncle’s chagrin, she falls for abolitionist John Davinier (Sam Reid). Their romance is set against the turbulence of the times. “I want everyone to see Dido come to a

revIew of the week

Mike BereznAk - ThursdAy, MAy 22nd sheelA & The OThers - FridAy, MAy 23rd Blue sTOne uniOn - sATurdAy, MAy 24Th lOndOn undergrOund - ThursdAy, MAy 29Th 4 kings - FridAy, MAy 30Th CAsTAwAys - sATurdAy, MAy 31sT

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

“Four Ways to Serve You” RESTAURANT MAY FEATURES:

FRENCH ONION CHICKEN FETTUCCINE CON CAMBERI ED PEPPERCORN CRUST TERIYAKI BEEF ORANGE ROUGHY AUGRATIN

PART Y CENTER

SPECIAL PRICING FOR BOOKING PARITES NOW IN JUNE, JULY & AUGUST!

CARRY-OUT

FOOD & BAKERY MENU FOR YOUR PARTIES AT HOME, FIRST COMMUNIONS, GRADUATIONS, SHOWERS!

CAR S SHEVOERW Y

WEDNESDAY WEATHER PERMITTING

COME SUPPORT OUR VETERANS!

8922 Ridge Rd., North Royalton, OH 44133

(440) 237-3434 | www.carriecerinos.com

eat

industry

The expansive studio at BurkleHagen. (Photo by Andrew Burkle at BurkleHagen)

picture perfect The growing market of commercial food photography in Cleveland By Douglas Tratter On a typical day, Heidi RObb will hit a few markets to load up on fresh produce, pop into a butcher shop for a thick steak, maybe visit the fishmonger for some plump Gulf shrimp before heading into the kitchen. There, she’ll clean and prep the veggies, get the mains

started on the grill, and then shift her focus to the sides and sauces. The table is set, the red wine is poured, and Robb plates up the gorgeous feast with keen attention to detail. Time to enjoy the fruits of her labor? Hardly — this is the part

(Photo by Clarissa Westmeyer at Kalman & Pabst)

food photography, are lions in the industry. Hagen, who for years worked at Kalman & Pabst, a 25-year-old Cleveland-based studio that shoots for national food brands, says that every aspect of his 6,000-squarefoot Asiatown studio was planned around commercial food photography. “We designed the kitchen with help from food stylists from Cleveland, Chicago and Pittsburgh,” Hagen explains. “You gotta keep the food stylists happy — they can be a tough group.” Take the freight elevator up a few floors, slide open the gate, and the first thing you’ll see are the twin commercial kitchens, outfitted with double sinks, double ovens, double stove tops and islands the size of, well, islands. There are overhead lights and power outlets galore, and the floors are springy enough to stand on for hours. In addition to the kitchen, there’s a

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Proof: They make food look exquisitely good.

when Robb, a professional food stylist, steps out of the way to make room for the photographer, who pops off a few dozen shots while the food still looks fresh. Welcome to the world of commercial food photography, where all that hard work is done at the behest of a paying client. While chefs and restaurants often serve as the face of the local food scene, there is a robust pocket dedicated to photographing that food for web, print and television. And, say practitioners of the craft, Cleveland is primed for growth in this multifaceted field. “I think it’s happening right now alongside our incredible culinary scene,” says David Hagen, who along with his business partner Andrew Burkle just opened this city’s first photography studio dedicated exclusively to shooting food. BurkleHagen, as the studio is called, joins others in the local market that, while not exclusive to

2013 Zagat Rated

815 Jefferson Ave., Cleveland, OH 44113 (216) 664-1000

Sit down with your guests.

BEST THAI RESTAURANT

Advertise with SCENE.

Cleveland Scene Readers Poll, 2010

HAPPY HOUR!

Mon- Fri 5-7p 1/2 OFF Drinks & Appetizers

Call 216-241-7550 for more information.

• FULL BAR SERVICE • TAKE OUT AVAILABLE OPEN FOR LUNCH MON-FRI 11:30AM-2:30PM DINNER @ 5PM

www.TyFunThaiBistro.com

STRAWBERRY MACADAMIA NUT SALAD (FOR A LIMITED TIME) Field Greens, Macadamia Nuts, Fresh Strawberries, Maytag Blue Cheese tossed in our Raspberry Poppyseed Vinaigrette

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

IS THIS HEAVEN?

LAKEWOOD

18516 Detroit Ave.

216-228-2299

CLEVELAND HEIGHTS 2194 Lee Rd.

216-321-7355 36

www.deweyspizza.com

NO, IT’S THE OLD ANGLE TAVERN 1848 West 25th Street, Corner of West 25th & Bridge Ohio City - Market District- Cleveland 216-861-5643 Find us on Facebook/Old Angle

eat

industry

The professional kitchen at Burklehagen can accommodate any and all needs. (Photo by Andrew Burkle at BurkleHagen)

Open Mon - Fri 11 a.m. - 9 p.m.

Every Friday Al l Day Fish Fry Dinne rs Lake Erie Perch , & Coconut ShWalleye rimp

Open Sat-Sun 9 a.m. - 9 p.m.

g Casual Waterfront Dinin ll Bar Daily happy hour 4-6 • Fu

Sunset C o

Every Fri cert Series day, 6-9P M Day th

Memoria l

rough La

bor Day

Only at Emerald Necklace Ma

Now On The Menu Daily Our Famous Clam Chowder & Chil i 12 Fresh Salad Options

rina 1500 Scenic Park Loop Trail • Lakewood, Oh 216-228-2233 • NellyBelly.com

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

• LIVE MUSIC • • THURSDAYS •

Jam Night

• SUNDAY •

Sunday Afternoon Acoustic Show Starts at 5pm

WITH

BUTCH ARMSTRONG & THE TOWER CITY BLUES BAND

VOTED #4 BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR! VOTED #9 BEST BURGER IN CLEVELAND!

2014 38

• FRIDAY • DANCE & KARAOKE w/DJ DAGOTTI 9pm • SATURDAY • MADISON CRAWL 5/24 SPELLBOUND 5/31

THANK YOU!!

2014

SHARON T. & MOJO MARY ROSE 5/25 ACOUSTIC ARTFORUM OPEN JAM 6/1 • WEDNESDAY •

TRIVIA NIGHT WITH THREE ROADSTRIVIA

5455 STATE RD • PARMA, OH • 216.741.7200 • www.GrillersPub.com

walk-in pantry for foodstuffs and a prop room filled with plates, silver, glassware, linens and anything else a shoot might require. “To have a fully functioning commercial kitchen in a studio is a dream,” says Robb, who says it’s not uncommon for a stylist to have to schlep cooking equipment with them to a gig. “It makes everything go so much smoother.” The studio might look massive — and it is — but it can fill up fast. “When you’re working with a large commercial account, there might be six, eight people on the shoot,” says Robb. In addition to the stylist, there’s the assistant stylist, prop stylist and photographers, of course. But on the client side there might be the art director, design director and account manager. That kind of space doesn’t come cheap in places like New York, Chicago and LA, markets that historically have been hotbeds of commercial food photography. When you combine Cleveland’s abundant, affordable space with an increasingly talented and foodfocused workforce, you have all the makings of an industry on the rise. In addition to large national brands like Nestle (and its gazillion sub-brands), Smucker’s, Vita-Mix and others that are based here, large restaurant groups like Zack Bruell’s, whom BurkleHagen shoots frequently, provide plenty of work. But local firms needn’t focus solely on local outfits as clients routinely travel to fulfill their commercial photography needs.

“We’re thinking regional and national,” says Hagen. “The tough part of our job is to convince clients to travel to Cleveland instead of Chicago. But when people do come here, they’re so surprised by what we have they have no problem coming back.” Burkle, who relocated here from Chicago to open the studio, says that there’s more work than ever thanks to the increasing demand for food images in magazines, websites, blogs and even social media. Long-term relationships, referrals from contented clients, and stylists like Robb and others who bring clients with them are providing BurkleHagen with a strong start. But food photography for web and print is just the tip of the iceberg, says Robb, who has worked with some of the biggest names in the industry, including Michael Symon, Stephen Raichlen and Martha Stewart Productions. “I think Cleveland is poised and primed not only for food photography, but with the access to space and talent that we have here, we can produce food television shows, food magazines and cookbooks.”

Burklehagan 3500 Payne Ave., (216) 432-1000, burklehagan.com.

dtrattner@clevescene.com t @dougtrattner

Jell-O Shots Are Here! Annual Jell-O shots are back! Available in all colors.

HAPPY HOUR ALL DAY, EVERYDAY!

Lunch. Dinner. Drinks.

Available until 7pm everyday

At Bistro 185, our creative menu changes daily to reflect the freshest, seasonal ingredients. Join us for a quick lunch, a memorable dining experience or a tantalizing craft cocktail.

Catch ALL the Tribe Games Here!

Monthly Specialty Dinners Creatively themed wine, beer & spirit pairings and vegan dinners.

$5.50 PITCHERS During ALL Games!

Social Hour Specials M – F 4:30 – 6:30pm

FRI : CONUNDRUM S AT : M O B I L AV E

991 East 185th Street 216.481.9635 bistro185.com

BIS_0040_ad_4.42x2.63_scn_0413b.indd 1

4/15/14 10:20 AM

LAKEWOOD 14701 Detroit Ave., Across from Melt 216-767-5770

with coupon Valid at the ABOVE location only. Not Valid if reproduced. No other discounts apply. One coupon per customer. • EXPIRES 5/31/14 SCENE •

MAY LIVE MUSIC

ANY SMOOTHIE

May22-- The The Higbees Fri.,Fri., May Higbees Sat., May33 -- Ryan Ryan Melquist Sat., May Melquist May99-- The The Barflys Fri.,Fri., May Barflys Sat., May 10 Brent Sat., May 10 BrentKirby Kirby May16 16 -- Walkin’ Cane Fri.,Fri., May Walkin’ Cane Sat., May17 17 -- Kristine Jackson Sat., May Kristine Jackson & Sat.,May May 23 Fri.Fri. & Sat., 23& &2424 - TheNew New Barleycorn - The Barleycorn

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

1 OFF

$ 00

MAY LIVE MUSIC

CC L EL E HI HI VVEELL AAN N DD • •OO

Sat., May31 31 -- The Sat., May TheBarflys Barflys Visitus us on on Facebook for for a complete list of list of Visit Facebook a complete liveentertainment, entertainment, food and drink specialsspecials live food and drink Prospect •• Cleveland, OhioOhio 44115 44115 • 216-781-7782 323323 E. E. Prospect Cleveland, • 216-781-7782 39

eat drink bourbon and brotherhood Or: The longest two ounces of my life

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

By Douglas Trattner

I fIrst learned that the Cleveland Bourbon Club existed a year and a half ago, and I’ve been trying to worm my way into a meeting ever since. The club, launched three years ago by a trio of attorneys, is one of the most exclusive organizations in town, limited to just 25 members — one for every ounce in a bottle of bourbon. Members include lawyers and chefs, but also a pharmacist, film producer, wine importer and spirits distiller. Once a month on a Monday night, the members drop everything to gather around one very long table and dissect bourbon and the occasional rye. “We drink bourbon and rye for the same reason we listen to jazz — because we’re American, goddammit!” says founding member David Brown. The genesis of the club can be traced back to the bottom of a cocktail glass. A shared love of fine cocktails, specifically Manhattans at the Velvet Tango Room, led to an obsessive quest to find the best bourbon for the task. Before long, the founding members were beating a path to a spirits retailer across state lines to load up on hard-to-find hootch. Like beer, the ingredients that

make up bourbon are few. But many are the differences when it comes to matters of appearance, aroma and taste. It is precisely those distinctions that are the raison d’être of the Cleveland Bourbon Club. “You can have two barrels of the same bourbon right fucking next to each other in the rick house and they’ll taste completely different,” explains Mathew T., the club’s information officer. With hundreds of bourbons on the market, the early years of the club were all about building a knowledge base, says founding member Edwin Vargas. “For the first two years we were all about tasting everything — the wider variety the better,” he says. “You taste, you come to your own evaluations and then you compare those observations against reviewers you trust.” Members have been added slowly and cautiously since the start. Potential candidates must be nominated by an existing member and then voted in by the entire club. Only recently did the club welcome its first — and only — female member. “We’re seeking people who will be fun to drink with, but also will take things seriously at the tastings,”

Members Rob Masek, Mitchell Yelsky and Jill Vedaa waiting for the next pour. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

Member Geoffrey Byrne ready to do some serious note-taking. (Photo by Emanuel Wallace)

notes founding member Nicholas Panagopoulos. Adds Mathew T., “The important thing is that you care about drinking American spirits, you want to see your palate develop and you want to contribute to and learn from the group.” Membership dues “are less than $500 per year,” which includes the right to taste two bourbons at each meeting. That might sound steep, but when you consider the costprohibitive nature of some of the bourbons in the line-up, you quickly see the rationale behind the club. In three years of tastings, no bourbon has been repeated. The 25-member cap is in place so that each member will receive a one-ounce pour from each 750 ml (approximately 25 ounces) bottle. Members with more than two or three unexcused absences in a year are kindly shown the door. At 7 p.m., the members gather around one long table in a private space. In accordance with the rules and recommendations of the club, nobody is wearing strong aftershave or cologne. One-ounce samples of two different bourbons are placed in front of each member, along with an official score sheet and a pen. There are jugs of water and water glasses, but no ice and zero food. The noses go first, plunged deep into the glass to receive the aromas. Next come the sips — chews, really — to distribute the booze all over the mouth to better experience it. There’s a lot of note taking, some pleasant chatter. Everybody manages to make their pours last much (much)

longer than mine. When everybody finishes evaluating both samples, the presentations begin. One by one, members offer up their personal assessment of both bourbons, using descriptors like tobacco, black pepper, clove, cooked sugar, butterscotch, cedar and circus peanuts for aroma and maple syrup, cinnamon, clove, oak, orange peel and leather for flavor. Finishes are debated and scores are given. Members are quiet and respectful throughout, and a round of applause follows each and every presentation. As one of the newest members — and the club’s only female member — Rockefeller’s chef Jill Vedaa admitted that she was a tad nervous before her first meeting. “When you think of bourbon, you think it’s a man’s drink,” she says. “But I’ve always loved bourbon and cigars.” Vedaa found that not only was she welcome, but that she brought value to the proceedings. “As a chef, I might be able to recognize certain flavors and tastes that others might not be able to pinpoint.” In the coming year, the club hopes to raise its visibility and utility through a public website. “We want to be taken seriously,” says Vargas. “We want a level of responsibility so that we can help others make the right decisions with regards to bourbon.”

dtrattner@clevescene.com t @dougtrattner

830 BaBBitt Rd. Euclid, OH 44123 FREE ValEt

216-732-7101 paRadisEislandsaloon.com

| BOOZE | Bands | BanGinG FOOd | FRi 23rd unGluEd

sat 24tH WHERE’s JiMMY

sun 25tH OnE EYEd JacKs

OpEn MEMORial daY @ 3pM

tH 29tH pOst ROad Fri 30tH BOOM

sat 31st tOYZ

sun 1st EasY GlistEninG

cHEcK Out OuR nEW dRinK MEnu

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014 41

eat

bites

pastas & pastry abruptly closes after just three months By Douglas Trattner with reporting from Jason Beudert 1401 E. 55th | Cleveland

(Between St. Clair and Superior)

216.881.4181

Hours:

CLOSED ON MONDAYS Tues-Wed 11:30 am - 2:30 pm Thursday 11:30 am - 7:00 pm Friday 11:30 am - 9:00 pm saturday 4:30 pm - 10:00 pm sunday 11:30 am - 6:00 pm

LuNCH AT sTErLE’s All Lunch specials

under $10

216-961-4455 Hours! 7am - 3pm Every Day

Tuesday thru Friday Ask About our New

Every Sandwich Comes w/FREE Soup & Fries

LuNCH LoYALTY ProGrAM

UFC TUF saturday, May 31st

BRASIL 3

Watch Party for uFC star

stipe Miocic -vs-

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Family Restaurant 9912 Lorain Ave.

2 Eggs with 2 Bacon or 2 Sausage and Toast $2.49

Soup & Salad Bar • Condiment Bar

Fabio Maldonado Meet uFC star Jessica Eye starts at 5:30pm Drink & Food specials

Live Music Friday, May 23

Polka Pirates 6:00pm - 9:00pm

saturday, May 24

edelweiss 5 6:00pm - 10:00pm

sterlescountryhouse.com

Kristina’s

Just three months after opening its doors in Ohio City, Pastas & Pastry (3800 Whitman Ave.) has shut them for good. “After storm damage on Wednesday forced us to close the restaurant, it was our final straw,” explains owner Diane Miller. “I decided to close the restaurant for good.” The weather damage was just the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back, Miller makes clear. Miller, owner of the J. Palen House Bed and Breakfast, is an admitted novice when it comes to running a restaurant. She left all operation details to her partner, Ron Heinbaugh. “I needed to be an active manager and I couldn’t devote full time to this project,” she says, adding, “My interests needed to be focused on my other businesses.” As for what’s next for the locale, which is a charming brick building on a quiet residential street in Ohio City, Miller is banking on the prime restaurant market in the area to take care of that. “I am an entrepreneur by nature and I’m confident there will be opportunities for a new concept to flourish,” says Miller. Heinbaugh refused to comment.

Piccadilly artisan creamery introduces the next Big thing Last week, brothers and business partners Adrian and Cosmin Bota unveiled the latest concept for their homegrown Piccadilly Artisan Creamery. Piccadilly’s third ice cream shop, located in University Circle across the street from the Cleveland Institute of Art, introduces Clevelanders to the coolest trend in ice cream. Piccadilly University Circle is an “à la minute ice cream parlor,” where ice cream is made to order using an ultracold churning process that employs liquid nitrogen.

“There are about 25 or 30 of these kinds of places scattered around the country,” says Adrian Bota. “We think it’s going to be the next big thing.” Guests can customize their orders right down to the dairy, flavors, fillings and toppings (including the option of using goat’s milk down the road). The ingredients are popped into a candy-colored Kitchen Aid mixer and liquid nitrogen is added. A whoosh of cool smoke envelops the workstation and, in a little over 90 seconds, real ice cream is made. Three workstations should help keep wait times down. “Because liquid nitrogen is so cold — 320 degrees below zero — the water particles in the dairy have no opportunity to crystallize. This results in the creamiest texture and richest flavor possible,” adds Adrian. Customers don’t ingest the nitrogen; it evaporates. All of the dairy is local and grassfed, with zero antibiotics, hormones or coloring, notes Adrian. This ultra-cold churning process also means that customers can enjoy a scoop here or take pints to go that contain no additives. “Even the best gourmet ice creams have preservatives, emulsifiers or stabilizers in them if you’re going to put them on store shelves,” explains Adrian. “Ours don’t, and they’ll last 30 days.” Indeed, the ice cream we sampled — caramel with sea salt, mint chocolate chip, chocolate — was incredibly smooth, creamy and jampacked with intense flavor. Prices will be comparable to that sold in other shops ($4.50 for a small, $5.75 for a large). The rustic-industrial scoop shop will celebrate its grand opening Saturday, May 24, at noon.

scene@clevescene.com t @cleveland_scene

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Enjoy Responsibly

43 Brand: Shock Top Item #: PST201410572 Job/Order #: 260845

Closing Date: 3/19/14 QC: CS

Publication: Scene Weekly

Trim: 9" x 11" Bleed: none Live: 8.5" x 10.5"

Music

concert preview

(Photo by Jason Nocito)

Skrillex after hearing that black bodysuits are just not cool.

rebel music Skrillex distills punk influences on groundbreaking electronica album Recess By Jeff Niesel

GIVEN THAT THE NAME Skrillex, the moniker under which Sonny Moore records and tours, is so clearly associated with electronic music, it’s rather surprising to hear that a Metallica show was the first concert he ever attended. “That was when I was living in San Francisco in 1998,” he says via phone from his Los Angeles studio where he was putting the finishing touches on music for the new Transformers movie. “From there, at a younger age I was more into heavy metal than punk rock. I saw bands like Machinehead, System of a Down, Slipknot.” After he moved back to his Los Angeles birthplace when he was 12, he gravitated toward “L.A. street punk.” “I remember watching bands like the Dickies and Dee Dee Ramone who played the Troubadour,” he says. “I was like 12 years old. [I listened to a] lot of street punk like the Casualties. That band used to play at Troubadour all the time. But MTV was so good at that time in the ’90s. You could discover so much shit and that’s when I remember seeing the Prodigy’s ‘Breathe’ video. To me that was punk rock. It sounded the same even though it was electronic, so that’s kind of how those influences crept in and hip-hop as well. Everyone that

of me wanting to move on anyway. I don’t know what it was. It might have been both because I knew I wanted to go off and do my own thing at some point, and I’ve always loved producing and that sort of thing.” In 2009, he released his first EP as Skrillex and then followed it up in 2010 with Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites and then More Monsters and Sprites, albums which established him as a cutting-edge electronic artist who was experimenting with a new style of music called dubstep. Released earlier this year, Recess has been promoted as his first studio record, a bit of a misnomer given the amount of music he’s put out. “With electronic music, it’s never really about making album albums,” he says. “You know it’s about giving people a lot of stuff over whatever period of time. Before Recess probably for me it was easy because I had full albums with stuff including singles, remixes and EPs. So I guess music is changing. There’s people in the media that kind of really make a big deal about certain things and I guess it is different in a sense that a lot more songs turn out at once, but I’ve never felt like [Recess] was my debut album because I had so much success with my other work and experience, you know. Not to mention doing multiple records with my other band. It just

I REMEMBER SEEING THE PRODIGY’S ‘BREATHE’ VIDEO. TO ME THAT WAS PUNK ROCK. — SONNY MOORE

kind of felt like I’ve always been making music in the last 10 years now so it’s just another one for the log.” He says the recording process for Recess was only slightly different than his previous endeavors. “I’ve been finishing the tail end of my previous releases as Skrillex and going to places like Asia and Russia,” he says. “So the record in essence was kind of made how all my other records were, like in hotels and airplanes and different cities and Korea and Japan and London and Seattle and wherever. Every time you make music, you’re a different person. You change so much. You sort of do what you do when you do it. I guess you know when you are that.”

SKRILLEX, DILLON FRANCIS, WHAT SO NOT, MILO AND OTIS 8 p.m. Tuesday, May 27. Jacobs Pavilion at Nautica, 2014 Sycamore St., 216-861-4080. Tickets: $49.50, livenation.com.

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

SIDETRACKS

Much of Skrillex’s music resembles dubstep, an electronic music subgenre characterized by ricocheting drum and bass riffs (think drum ’n’ bass, only trippier). While the music started out as an underground phenomena, it’s quickly become mainstream and Skrillex has already won six Grammys over the course of his short career. His new studio effort, Recess, is a collection of surprisingly accessible tunes that dabble in dubstep, techno and hip-hop. Here are some highlights from the album.

“ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND BROSTEP” This track features a sample of some dialog from an instructional video about how to launch a rocket. It also dabbles in reggae riffs and includes metallic sounding noises that cut in and out of the mix.

“RECESS” Skrillex shows off his hip-hop influences with this bouncy tune that mimics the free-for-all that typifies a recess break. The percolating synthesizer beats are syncopated to the refrain, “put your hands in the air/we don’t care.”

“TRY IT OUT (NEON MIX)” Featuring producer Alvin Risk, this tune was released as the album’s first single and has been remixed numerous times. This particular mix features poltergeistlike vocals and symphonic flourishes; it’s a much more ambient tune than most of the material on Recess.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

skateboarded was listening to hiphop. That all sort of created a hybrid of all the stuff I grew up with.” At first, Moore joined the punk band From First to Last. He sang lead vocals with the group but heavy touring started to take a toll on his voice and he started to think about other musical endeavors. “We were touring around in a band trailer across the U.S. when I was 16 years old,” he says. “Your guarantees were 150 bucks for the night so we had to sell as much merch as we could, you know, maxing our credit cards at the beginning to make it work. It was fun. That’s like growing up at its fullest just being out there. But I wonder if the problems with my throat were part

He also found time to write the score for Harmony Korine’s film Spring Breakers. While Korine’s film features mainstream Hollywood stars like James Franco, it’s shot as if it were an underground arthouse flick and fits well within Korine’s oeuvre of experimental cinema. “A lot of people were so surprised that I could make different styles of music and didn’t realize I could do stuff like Spring Breakers or anything like that,” Moore says. “When I make Skrillex music, the whole idea is to have a connection or impact in a festival or club environment. That’s why it’s so fun in a different way when you do something like Spring Breakers, it’s really not about that. Yeah, I mean it was different but it was fun. Yeah, that’s why I was ecstatic because I was a huge fan of what Harmony has been doing. He kind of gave me the freedom to be myself but also create stuff.” The electronic music scene is undoubtedly going to evolve and change as time goes on, so what does Moore think the future is going to be like? “Electronic music I think is going to do less of just the pure rave scene and more of a music thing,” he says. “I think you’ll see more collaborations and there’s a culture there that connects things like Skrillex and A$AP Rocky, and Chance the Rapper, whatever these things are and more of a musical thing than just a rave thing. Also, you’ll see bands embracing the electronic platform as a producing tool; you know everyone’s using electronics to make music. Whether it’s Arcade Fire or Foster the People or pure electronic bands, guys like Major Lazer who are taking vocals and making rave tunes out of them. Just becoming musically more a platform and a genre so there’s no bubble. I mean until people stop buying software, there’s no electronic music bubble.”

Kent Folk Festival JaMES McMurTry

6/5-6/14 kentfolkfestival.org

PETEr rowan 5/29

5/31

PrESErvaTion hall Jazz Band

Rufus wainwrighT

SEcrET SiSTErS

& ThE BoTTlE rocKET

iron & winE w/opening guest

06/22

06/21

6/27

& KEnny waynE ShEPard 06/24

roBErT randolPh FaMily Band

BEauSolEil avEc MichaEl doucET 07/17

06/24

175 E. Main St., Kent 330.677.5005 • www.facebook.com/TheKentStage Tickets @ http://www.kentstage.org/

PERFORMANCE ARTS CENTER AT CLEVELAND MASONIC AUDITORIUM 3615 EUCLID AVENUE, CLEVELAND, OHIO 44115

www.facebook.com/PACcleveland

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

ONE OF AMERICA’S MOST BELOVED SINGER SONGWRITERS DON MCLEAN American Pie, Crying, And I Love You So, Vincent (Starry, Starry Night), Castles In The Air

Wednesday, June 11th at 8 PM

JUST ANNOUNCED! NEW DATE!

Lights by the legendary Pig Light Show

America’s Top British Invasion Show. More than just The Beatles! Your favorite British Invasion songs plus the American “responses” from The Monkees, The Turtles and more!

Saturday, August 23rd at 8 PM 46

Friday, Sept. 26th at 8 PM

TICKETS: WWW.PACCLEVELAND.COM OR CALL (216) 432-2370

US:

@HOBCLEVELAND

308 EUCLID AVE. CLEVELAND, OH 44114 • 216.523.BLUE

THIS SUNDAY! MAY 25

Complete listing at houseofblues.com/cleveland

FUTURE w/Rico Love • QUE • r.o.e.

STEEL PANTHER

MAY 28

MAY 29

W/LUCIUS

w/FUTURE VILLIANS

W/FOY VANCE

MAY 30

JUNE 3

MAY 29 MASONIC AUDITORIUM

JUNE 5

JUST ANNOUNCED

JUNE 10

JUNE 13

w/streets of laredo

w/lighthouse & the whaler

ASHER RO

JUNE 17

JUNE 17 CAMBRIDGE ROOM

JUNE 18

ge id br m ca

JUNE 8 CAMBRIDGE ROOM

mike stud

om ro ge id br m ca

JULY 15 ON SALE NOW

om ro

COMING SOON

JUNE 19 june 27 june 28 july 2 july 10 july 11 july 13 july 23 july 28 AUG. 8 aug. 9

BUY TICKETS AT

JUNE 20

george clinton & parliament/funkadelic turnpike troubadours cambridge room boy & bear cambridge room bonobo lord huron zappa plays zappa sevendust gogol bordello w/man man ONE MORE TIME: DAFT PUNK TRIBUTE MKTO

aug. 12 aug, 15 aug. 19 aug. 21 aug. 28 sept. 5 sept. 7 sept. 9 sept. 19 SEPT. 30

robin trower

JUNE 29 presidents of the united states of america mega 80s tesla matt nathanson w/andrew mcmahon slightly stoopid led zeppelin 2 paul weller afghan whigs downtown festival...the war on drugs ST. VINCENT-in association with

OCTOBER 15 ON SALE FRI. 10AM

Buy Tickets at houseofblues.com Order By Phone: 800.745.3000 • House of Blues Box Office

Music

concert preview

Bring the noise

Now That’s Class’ annual Horrible Fest returns with an even bigger line-up than last year

the members of iceage contemplate the world’s mysteries. (Photo by Kristian Emdal)

By Jeff Niesel

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

EvEry yEar whEn thE garagE punk blowout that is Horrible Fest comes to an end, organizers Russ “Romance” Murphy and Paul Schlachter swear that they won’t go through the agony of doing it again. And yet, they’ve kept the festival going strong for nine years now (they say they’ll stop when they reach 10). This year’s event, slated to take place over Memorial Day weekend at Now That’s Class, promises to be another terrific showcase of national and international underground acts. And there’s lots of local talent on the bill too. Murphy and Schlachter recently sat down with us at Now That’s Class to go over the four-day line-up. “It’s a unique atmosphere,” says Murphy. “You won’t see some of these bands anywhere else in the U.S. Some people come for the obscure bands. Some people come to party.” The promoters estimate that at least half their audience comes from out of town. Here’s their take on what to expect from this year’s festival.

Night 1

8 p.m., Thurs., May 22. Iceage/ Buck Biloxi/Prostitutes/Obnox/ Queen of Hell/Uniform/Fat Vegan/Mr. California/Zack the Ripper/Cruelster. Tickets: $10. Murphy: Usually, the first night is a warm-up night but this year it’s full on. Iceage only has six U.S. shows. We’re one of those six shows. They’re a terrific post punk band. They’re really young, all around 21 years old. Schlachter: Some people say they sound like Joy Division. I don’t think that but they have brooding, dramatic vocals. They’re coming here just for the fest. They’ll fill the place by themselves. They did last time they played here, and they’re much more popular now.

B B Q & W i N g E asy

5 p.m., Fri., May 23. The Wingtones/ Burger Boys/Mr. California. Tickets: Free. M: That’s an annual tradition. S: It’s always real fun. I got a hot tub for that night. The Wingtones don’t play anymore because one of the members doesn’t live here anymore. They only sing songs about chicken wings. The one guy plays a chicken wing bass. They have a guy dressed as chicken wing Godzilla monster. They call him Wingzilla. It’s entertaining. They play on the back patio. There will be free hotdogs for everyone. We’ll have vegan dogs too. Night 2

8 p.m., Fri., May 23. Secret Prostitutes/Counter Intuits/ Homostupids/Wetbrain/Hep Z/ Mordecai/Unholy Two/Basement Boy. Tickets: $12. M: The biggest band is Secret Prostitute. They’re flying here for two days for the fest. They’re not playing any other shows. I played them on WCSB and other people have too. S: They’re a cult band. M: Their records on eBay go for 70 or 80 bucks. The singer sings in Indonesian and a few other languages. They’ll do a cover song by a German band. They play really short songs. The Counter Intuits will be great. It’s Ron House from Thomas Jefferson Slave Apartments. The other members are all from local Cleveland bands. S: [Ron House] is really charismatic. This is maybe their sixth show. M: And Mordecai is in a similar vein. They sound like protopunk stuff like Television and the Velvet Underground. [The night’s line-up] is all over the place. Wet Brains play hardcore punk and bring in a good crowd.

S: Hep-Z is like AC/DC with obnoxious lyrics. M: Unholy Two and Mordecai have EPs coming out so it’s like an LP release show for both bands. MatiNEE & BBQ at CastlE grEatskull

2-7:30 p.m., Sat., May 24. Vile Gash/Mangina/Hank Wood & the Hammerheads/World Domination/ Degreaser/Cracked Up/Party Plates/ Royal Blood. Tickets: $10. M: Vile Gash rarely plays out. They were a hardcore band from Columbus. The singer moved to Chicago. We asked them to do the show and they’re very aggressive. They play 30-second songs. Their whole set will last 10 minutes. S: Mangina is a good black metal band. They’re pretty obnoxious. M: Degreaser is a little more tuneful than they used to be. World Domination sounds like Hawkwind. Hank Wood had to cancel last year and they’re playing twice this year. They’re well-known in punk circles. They’re hardcore kids doing snotty garage punk. It’s very stripped down and primitive. S: It’s a real mix. Cracked Up is country and Party Plates is metal. It’s really varied. Night 3

8 p.m., Sat., May 24. Gary Wrong Group/Destruction Unit/S.H.I.T./Hank Wood & the Hammerheads/Lumpy & the Dumpers/Classhole/Bad Noids/ Short Rabbits. Tickets: $12. M: Destruction Unit will wrap everything up. They’re very loud. They have it in their rider that they have to perform at a certain decibel level or they won’t play. They have a film thing they do too. It’s over the top, heavy psyche. Gary Wrong

played here a couple of years back. They were new at the time and took people by surprise. They have a synth player and they play weird punk rock. They sound a little like early Butthole Surfers. Short Rabbits are a good local band and they don’t play too often. The only show I remember them doing was when they opened for Flag at the Grog Shop. MorNiNg aftEr Pill Party

6 a.m., Sun., May 25. Yankee Peddler/Wetbrain/Real Regular/ Aggressive Response/MC HomelessPeaks Ohio. Tickets: Free. M: It was a raging success last year. You get three hours to rest. There are a lot of bizarre acts. S: We have a bluegrass guy. He’s really talented. He plays banjo and sings and plays fiddle. We’ll have breakfast tacos. Our friend is making the Mexican food. She grew up in Texas. It’s the real deal. horriBlE fEst DEath fiNalE

4 p.m., Sun., May 25. The Hussy/ Wooly Bullies/Teen Vomit/Swirly in the River. Tickets: Free. S: There is a little matinee to end the thing. The Hussy has a good following. They’re a garage rock band. M: There are a couple of locals who wrap everything up for those who are still going. S: If we survive this one, the tenth will be the last one. M: Maybe we should just stop at nine.

Horrible Fest May 22-25, horriblefest.com.

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

P O H S G THE GRO

ND HTS D, CLEVELA D HTS BLV ND 2785 EUCLI88 GROGSHOP.GS IDNIGHTHAOW! 216.321.55 N AF TER M YS

ER DMISSIO AF TER EV FREE A A L DRINKS $1 OFF L

SUN 5/25

FRI 5/23

SMOKE NOISES Urbindex • Freeze-tag DJ Corey Grand

TROPIDELIC Wanyama

MON 9/8

ASTROMAN? FLOBOTS MAN OR The Pack A.D. • Wray TUE 7/8

Vibe & Direct • Gnosis THU 5/22 WED 6/11

LETBlackgrass ‘EM RUN MODERN BASEBALL Baptism Tiny Moving Parts • The Hotelier

FRI 6/27

FOXY SHAZAM

The Gonzo Tour w/ Special Guests

Misery Jackals Lords Of The Highway Sorority Noise • Signals Midwest

SAT 5/24

ATLAS Skies of December

Larry and His Flask

THU 6/12 SAT 6/28

CAYUCAS THE ARKELLS Sun Club The Commonwealth

This Is A Lifetime The Missing • Visionaires • Conjurist

Summerays Pipe Dream

SAT 5/31

FRI 6/13 7PM CARBON TIGERS The Promise Hero MICHAEL IAN BLACK Bygone Days Mike Polk Jr

THU 7/3

KINGSOLO BUZZO ACOUSTIC

100,000 Leagues Under My Nutsack

Across the Viaduct • Entendre

SUN 6/1

KISHI BASHI Busman’s Holiday

SAT 6/14

CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH Stagnant Pools

Dolfish

SUN 7/6

NIGHTMARES ON WAX N.O.W. IS THE TIME TOUR WITH FULL BAND! Muamin Collective

MON 6/2 WED 6/18

WED 7/16

The Copyrights • Sam Russo Dogbreth

Regal Degal

THETHE LAWRENCE ARMS ANDREW JACKSON JIHAD METROPOLE TOUR Cheap Girls

DIIV LODRO

THU 6/19

SAT 7/19 JAIL WEDDINGS TMIBH TWIN FORKS Wooly Bullies

WED 6/4

THE MENZINGERS Lemuria • Pup • Cayetana

Wed 5/28 NEW CLEVELAND BIRTHDAY EDITION W/ CURTIS WILLIAMS & DJ ESO

THU 6/5 FRI 6/20

NEIL HAMBURGER POLIÇA Lolawolf Alvarius B The Very Knees

Thu 5/29 FREE SHOW THADDEUS ANNA GREEN • Gentlemen of Leisure Fri 5/30 MORTICIA’S CHAIR • Lo-Fi Eyed • Dutch Babies • Superbomb

2875 EUCLID HEIGHTS BLVD CLEVELAND HEIGHTS

Happy Hour Every Day until 9 PM

M: GeekCle.Com Presents Nerd Trivia (8 PM) T: Back Tue The Future w / DJ K-Nyce. 10 PM W: Mug Night (All Day) TH: Mic-Aroni Open Mic Night (8:00 PM) F: DJ Mike Filly (10 PM) SAT: DJ MisterBradleyP & Friends (10 PM) SUN: DJs Eso & Corey Grand (10 PM) 5/30: Patio Opening Party 6/01: Flip Flops & Tank Tops (Every Sunday at 5) 6/20: Fortune Presents: Ursula 1000 CURRENTLY BOOKING HOLIDAY PARTIES, BIRTHDAY PARTIES, COMPANY GATHERINGS, REUNIONS, ETC. Call 216.932.1966 for details. Any size party package available.

Hours: SUN-TUE: 7 PM - 2:30 AM WED-SAT 5 PM - 2:30 AM THE GROG SHOP PRESENTS AT

THE BEACHLAND BALLROOM

Fri 6/6 VENOMIN JAMES • The Great Iron Snake • My Pet Monster

Sapir E. Gram

Sat 6/7 late KNYCE POTLUCK Mon 6/16 THE FEATURES • Painted Palms Sun 6/22 ALEX TUCKERS SUPER DUMB 25TH B DAY

JOE PURDY Brian Wright

JARED LOGAN Bill Squire • Ramon Rivas

Sun 6/29 SERGIO FROM RIO • Blacklister Wed 7/9 CIRCA SURVIVE • Ume Fri 7/11 SAINTSENECA • Traveling Sun 7/13 BAD SUNS • Colony House • These Knees • Lowercase D Thu 7/17 GRIEVES • Sonreal Fri 7/18 DARLING WASTE • THE DAMN CHOIR • Archie Powell & the Exports

SUN 6/8

Mon 7/21 TOUCHE AMORE • Tigers Jaw • Dads

The Art of Chill Tour MON 6/23 NITTY SCOTT, MC • ALEX WILEY Ken Rebel • J Sirus Purple Monkey Sircus Lonesome Ranger Phil Jetson • Joey Aiche

MELISSA FERRICK

Tue 7/22 SUBHUMANS (UK) • Mischief Brew Thu 7/24 GUITAR LEGEND DICK DALE • The Beyonderers Tue 7/29 J RODDY WALSTON AND THE BUSINESS Wed 7/30 7SECONDS • The Copyrights • Fuck You Pay Me

BLITZEN TRAPPER

WED 6/4 THE PARKINGTON SISTERS • THE COMMONWEALTH THE GROG SHOP PRESENTS AT

HOUSE OF BLUES

Thu 7/31 PHOX • JD Sunde Fri 8/1 Common Vision Tour HUNDREDTH • COUNTERPARTS

MON 6/9

TWEAK BIRD We Are Hex

TUE 6/24

OCD:MOOSH & TWIST

Ultrasphinx

Fri 8/8 THE ADMIRABLES • Revolution Brass Band Tue 9/9 THE ORWELLS • Skaters Thu 9/11 JOYCE MANOR Fri 9/12 MINERAL • INTO IT. OVER IT. Fri 10/6 IL SOGNO DEL MARIANO (MIKE WATT)

TUE 6/10 WED 6/25

WASHED OUT GEMINI CLUB Wunder Wunder The Griswolds

TICKETS TO GROG SHOP EVENTS ARE AVAILABLE THROUGH

www.ticketweb.com

LOOP • MUSIC SAVES • MY MIND’S EYE • RECORD REVOLUTION ERIE ST. GUITARS • THE RECORD SHOP • SQUARE RECORDS Or just get ‘em from the club! Call 216.321.5588

FRI 6/13

ATMOSPHERE

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

SAT 6/21

SAT 6/7 7:00PM

music

concert preview

touch blackberry smoke’s gear and there’ll be hell to pay. (Photo by David McClister)

starr power

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Southern rockers Blackberry Smoke are the thinking redneck man’s band By Jeff Niesel

The guys in The redneck rock band Blackberry Smoke regularly spend 200 days a year on the road, so it’s not that odd that their upcoming show in Cleveland will mark their second appearance here in 2014. Back in February, they played at House of Blues, but the guys have continued touring ever since that show. “It’s been a busy year,” says singer-guitarist Charlie Starr, adding that the band intends to head to the studio in July to begin recording a new album. “We have a live album that will be out in a week or so and that’s been in the process for a little while because there’s an accompanying DVD. It’s from a show in North Carolina and that will be a stop-gap before the next studio album. It would be great if we get it done quickly and can have it out before the end of the year.” Starr says the band has included a few of the new tracks in its live set — “We sprinkle them in here and there” — and he promises the new disc will provide the same quotient of balls-to-the-wall rockers and bluegrass ballads. Dipping into different genres is something that Starr, who grew up in the Atlanta area, has done well ever since he first picked up a guitar when he was

a kid. “I’m from the Southeast and so for people of my generation, there’s a lot of religion,” he says. “My father and grandmother were very religious and from that side of the family I got gospel songs. My dad taught me bluegrass and country songs. My mom liked rock ’n’ roll, so she loved the Stones and the Beatles and Dylan. It was a good mixture.” At first, Starr just focused on playing guitar. But after working with more than one singer who couldn’t really cut it, Starr figured it was time to take over as frontman. “Eventually I realized I would have to do it if I want to explore that avenue,” he says. “I got the bug to write songs and I didn’t want anyone else to sing anything. The first song I wrote for Blackberry Smoke to play was ‘Sanctified Woman’ and I still like that song. That was back in 2000.” The band put out its debut in 2003. It followed it up in 2004 with another album but, according to Starr, the group became involved in “two different label disasters.” During that time, the band continued to tour and play new songs every night. While on a Lynyrd Skynyrd-hosted cruise in the mid-2000s, Starr met up-and-coming

singer-songwriter Zac Brown. “That was before he had exploded into popularity and fame and fortune,” he says. “He was just a guy in a band like us. When he achieved his success and started his own label, we signed to his label and then went on the road with him. His band and crew are all just wild and there’s a lot of post-show parties with people breathing fire in the parking lot.” When it came time to record its debut for Zac Brown’s label, the band kicked out 17 songs in five days. Released in 2013, the resulting album, The Whippoorwill, is a great collection of Southern rock-inspired tunes that show off Starr’s consummate songwriting chops. The band’s been dubbed “the new face of blue-collar Southern rock” — something that sits well with Starr. The title track is a terrific jam that Starr wrote about his late grandmother. “It’s sort of a tribute to her,” he says. “She was a great woman and influenced my life and my way of being. She was the type of person you strive to be like. I remember her teaching me about what birds made different sounds. Those kind of memories come flooding back from time to time and I captured them in that song. I hope she’s proud and

hears it up there.” Starr says the band has picked a producer for its upcoming studio album but he’s not allowed to reveal the details just yet. But he does know it will reflect the diversity of his musical influences. “The new album will be a mixture of songs,” he explains. “There’s some good greasy rock ’n’ roll songs and there’s some laid-back acoustic funky stuff. We don’t want to make the same record twice. Some of the songs have more atmosphere and some are tunes that the Faces would be proud of or Lynyrd Skynyrd or Little Feat would be proud of. We play a nice hodgepodge of styles, but it’s not something too out of whack. It’s not like we’re going to make a hip-hop album anytime soon.”

Marc’s Great aMerican rib cook-off & Music festival: blackberry sMoke 6:15 p.m. Monday, May 26. Jacobs Pavilion at Nautica, 2014 Sycamore St., 216-861-4080. Tickets: $8, livenation.com.

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

music thu

Livewire

05/22

The guys in Primus show off their scholarly side. See: Thursday. (Photo by Tod Brilliant)

incredible musicianship, particularly that of Claypool, who’s a real virtuoso on the bass. The guys aren’t playing a huge number of shows this summer — they’re performing here as they make their way to the Summer Camp Music Festival in Chillicothe, Ill. — so don’t let the opportunity to see them slip away. 7 p.m., $27.50-$42.50. Jacobs Pavilion. (Niesel) Bad Boys Jam: 9 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Hayes Carll/Travis Linville: 8 p.m., $15. Musica. Vicki Chew/Stephe Lee Rich & Sandy Anding: 8 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Frenchy & The Punk/Pinch and Squeal/ The Men That Will Not Be Blamed For Nothing: 9 p.m. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Front Porch/The Troubadours of Divine Bliss: 10 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Chris Hatton (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Horrible Fest Night 1 with Iceage/Buck Biloxi/Prostitutes/Obnox/Queen of Hell/ Uniform/Fat Vegan/Mr. California/Zack the Ripper: 8 p.m., $10. Now That’s Class. Let ‘Em Run/Blackgrass Baptism/Misery Jackals/Lords Of The Highway: 8 p.m., $6. Grog Shop. Amanda Martinez: 8 p.m., $20. Nighttown. Northeast Ohio Drum & Music Jam: 9 p.m., free. Beachland Ballroom. Slaves/Cilver/Tim Moon/ Jason Uzzle: 6:30 p.m., $12-$14. Agora Ballroom.

fri

05/23

Trey Anastasio Band: The frontman of Phish hasn’t stopped in Cleveland since 2006, making tonight’s TAB appearance even more achingly anticipated. There’s also Phish’s summer tour right around the corner; Trey’s music will help sate our appetites for all of that. But TAB rolls on a different wavelength than Phish. Trey is very much in his element with his solo band, and there’s a very ensemble-ish feel to everything. Like a conductor, Trey leads a band rife with terrific horns and dynamic vocalists. Of course, he’ll still rip up some excellent solos and lead the band now and then into a bit of Type-II jam territory (“Sand,” “First Tube,” “Push on ’Til the Day”) all garnering frequent trips into improv land. This will be Ohio’s only tangential connection with Phish this year, as there’s no Blossom date on their upcoming tour. Tonight’s sure to be fun beyond belief. ...And I’ll see you all at Pine Knob. 7:30 p.m. House of Blues. (Sandy) Animals as Leaders/Conquering Dystopia/Chon: Instrumental prog metal: the thinking man’s metal, in a sense. There’s something really palatable about what Animals as Leaders were throwing down on their latest cut, The Joy of Motion (2014). The speed, the time signature

bafflement, the sheer vastness of the sound all combine into a frenzied thunderstorm of music that calls to mind the peaks of Meshuggah’s output. The compositional breakdown of songs like “Kascade” gives the listener plenty of dynamic movements to chew on, which is one ideal consequence of good music. Guitarist and founder Tosin Abasi has really dug deep into his vision for this band (a sprawling expansion on his past forays into metalcore). The Nigerian guitarist wreaks havoc on his eightstring ax and along the way he’s busted open the instrumental metal niche for a fan base that might never have considered such a thing. 7 p.m., $16-$18. Agora Ballroom. (Sandy) Mindless Behavior/ OMG Girlz/Jacob Lattimore: 7 p.m., $39.50-$48.50. State Theatre. Smoke Noises/Urbindex/Freeze-Tag/ DJ Corey Grand: 9 p.m., $8. Grog Shop. Caliber: 9:30 p.m. Brothers Lounge. George Foley: 10:30 p.m., free. Nighttown. Gotham City: 9:30 p.m. Vosh Club. John Hardy Band: 9:30 p.m. Thirsty Cowboy. Horrible Fest BBQ and Wing Easy with the Wingtones/Burger Boys/Mr. California: 5 p.m., free. Now That’s Class. Horrible Fest Nite 2: Secret Prostitutes/ Counter Intuits/Homostupids/Wetbrain/ Hep Z/Mordecai/Unholy Two/Basement

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

The Faint/Reptar: Indie rockers the Faint almost called it quits after releasing their last studio effort, 2008’s Fasciinatiion. But after a hiatus of sorts, the band reconvened last year to record its new album, Doom Abuse, a collection of tunes with a jittery, frenetic energy that recalls the Faint records of yesteryear. The album opens with the noisy “Help in the Head” and then veers into Devo territory with the glitchy “Dress Code.” Overall, the album is a solid effort that should translate well to the stage. Expect the band to have some trippy visuals in tow too. 7 p.m., $22. House of Blues. (Jeff Niesel) Jahman Brahman/Aqueous/Yosemight: This Columbus-based jam outfit hasn’t picked up as much attention in the community as they likely deserve. The band’s 2010 debut, NewFields, is a cohesive collection of summery funk. Songs like “A Screw Loose (Or So…)” contrast melodically tight verses with wider moments of “shred ’n’ flow,” as the band members have described it. Album opener “Life (Give and Take)” really sets the table nicely, falling back on a simple chord progression accented with delightful keys work and singer Justin Brown’s enthusiastic lyrics. (Tune your ears into the playful tempo games in that one.) Notably, this is also Aqueous’ one Cleveland stop on their fairly massive summer tour. We’ve written about their extraordinary musicianship plenty in the mag, and they come highly recommended. Don’t miss it! 9 p.m., $10. Beachland Tavern. (Eric Sandy) Primus/Beats Antiquee: In the early ’90s, Primus concerts were really something to behold. The band’s major label debut, Sailing the Seas of Cheese, featured tunes such as “Jerry Was a Race Car Driver” and “Tommy the Cat,” songs that boast infectious bass lines and nasally singer Les Claypool’s distinctive voice. They really caught hold with young listeners from the skate/surf crowd who would keep the mosh pit going hard and heavy when the band played live. Eventually, jam band fans caught on to the group and it’s played to that audience ever since. As a result, the live shows aren’t as manic but rather show off the band’s

LUNCH SPECIALS DAILY

HIgHland square tavern

11609 DETROIT AVE CLEVELAND

216.226.2767

• Wi-Fi HERE! •

11634 MADISON AVE • N.E. CORNER OF W. 117th ST

216.472.0920

BROTHERSLOUNGE.COM

facebook.com/brotherslounge FrI 5/23• 9:30PM

Country

cAliBER

highlandsquaretavern.com

PRIVATE PARTIES & BENEFITS

THIS SAT 5/24 LIVE BAND • NO COVER!

THE LOCALS

saT 5/24• 9:30PM

VElVET SHAKE

Classic Rock

WEDNESDAYS • 9PM

sUN 6/1 • 5-9PM

CAsinO ROYALE FunDRAisER

TONE DEF KARAOKE/DJ You Have To See This Guy!

Benefitting the Detroit Ave. Merchants Association

THIRSTY THURSDAYS

Feat.

BillY dONATO

POWER HOUR

star Of the World Famous tropicana in Las Vegas $25 DONaTION PEr PErsON sponsored By

CUDELL IMPrOvEMENTs, INC.

EvEry THUrsDay • 7:00

LADiEs night

9-11PM

DJ FRI/SAT WINGS - TUES/THURS TACOS - WED

BAD BOYs OF BLuEs

Tommy’s

35¢ BONELESS • 45¢ BONE-IN

MEMORIAL WEEKEND!

TUE • sushi night WED • $5 BuRgER night

Super Outdoor Dining

$4 WINE•MarTINIs•CHaMPaGNE And Later At 9:00pm

JAM night MONDAY • WING NIGHT MOJO BIG BAND • 8PM

ROCKY RIVER

Place

House • Bar • Kitchen

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

THU • $2 tACO night

THURS. 22

FRi 5/23 8:00PM

TRAVEliN’ JOHNSONS SAT 5/24 • 8:00PM

SAM BRENNER

EVERY MONDAY

VElVET VOYAGE @8 TUES 5/27 2 SET TUESdAy 6:30 & 8:30

CHRIS HANNA

WEDNESDAY • 8:00PM 10 X 3 SiNGER-SONGWRiTER SHOWCASE W/BRENT KIRBy contact: harvesttownmusic@gmail.com

EVERY THURSDAY • 8:00PM

CHRIS HATTON’S MUSicAl ciRcUS

porch & deck

WINE BAR

All GENRES • All STYlES PiANO & DRUMS PROViDED

PETE CAVANO & friends

Feat. The Area’s Top Musical Guests Weekly!

This Thurs: BECKY BOYD

FRI. 23

MARK & DANTE SAT. 24

SAT. NITE HOUSE PARTY!

JACK THE DJ

BREAKFAST 9-2 OPEN 11AM! OUTDOOR GRILLIN’

SUN

MON

RIBS • CHICKEN • BURGERS LOTS MORE!

FRI. 30

BILL MARCH SAT. 31

FISHER BROS. 1325 LINDA ST. • 440-331-9687

music Boys: 8 p.m., $12. Now That’s Class. It’s a Spring Fling with Man Overboard/ Citizen/Transit/Pentimento/Cruel Hand/ Forever Came/Calling/Knuckle Puck/ Captain We’re Sinking/Seaway/Better Off/Young Statues/Front Porch Step/ Ages/Dead Leaves/Gates: 5:30 p.m., $20 ADV, $25 DOS. Beachland Ballroom. JCK Birthday Show! with From Borealis/ Gavin The Third/Mike from Red Sun Rising: 7 p.m., $7. Musica. Marc’s Great American Rib Cook-Off & Music Festival: Disco Inferno/The Spazmatics: 6:30 p.m. Jacobs Pavilion. Nick Tolford and Company/Relaxer: 10 p.m. Happy Dog. Order of the Dead/Vindicator: 8 p.m., $7. The Foundry. Residency Night w/ Boudreaux’s Back Porch: 8 p.m., free. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Kenny Rogers: 8 p.m., $49.50-$85. Hard Rock Rocksino. Tom Shaper & Friends/The Del Rios/ George Foley & Friends: 5:30 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Travelin’ Johnson (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge.

sat

05/24

Marc’s Great American Rib Cook-Off & Music Festival: Joan Jett and the Blackhearts: 9:15 p.m. Jacobs Pavilion. Atlas/Skies of December/This Is A Lifetime/The Missing Visionaires/ Conjurist: 7:30 p.m., $10. Grog Shop. Big in Japan: 9:30 p.m., $5. Vosh Club. Blonde Boy Grunt & the Groans/Rio Neon: 8 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Sam Brenner (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Flex Crew/Willie Phoenix & the Soul Underground: 9 p.m., $10. Beachland Ballroom. Horrible Fest Nite 3: Gary Wrong Group/ Destruction Unit/S.H.I.T./Hank Wood & the Hammerheads/Lumpy & the Dumpers/ Classhole/Bad Noids/Short Rabbits: 8 p.m., $12. Now That’s Class. Intra CD Release/Hoodeech: 8:30 p.m., $5. Beachland Tavern. Ed Klaehn: 6 p.m. Vosh Club. Last Alarm Fund Raiser Music by RiverHawk and Cleveland Pipes and Drums: 9 p.m. Thirsty Cowboy. Once in a Lifetime Tour with Regi FIF/ Freowav/A Brilliant Night/DD- Step/ Pledge Yesterday/Don’t Fight Eat Fudge/ The Bakers/Ryan Vason/Sirdel/Spilled Milk/Outta Plumb/Kevlar/Besides these

Livewire Walls/Ataxia/Fool’s Brew/Vex/Stinger: 4 p.m., $15. Agora Ballroom. Time Cat CD Release Show with Acid Cats/Meow Meow Kitty/Sancat: 9 p.m., $8. Musica. Tinko/Jivviden: $7. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Velvet Shakedown: 9:30 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Verma/Eye/Francesco Maraldo: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Jackie Warren: 10:30 p.m., free. Nighttown.

sun 05/25 Travis “Moonchild” Haddix: Many years ago, when I was very young, I met Travis Haddix at some iteration of the Cleveland Blues Festival. I had no idea who he was, but his name stuck with me. He even signed my program. Anyway, years later, as I got more and more into blues, Haddix’s name would crop up in my listening at irregular intervals. Now and then I would delve into Cleveland’s fairly under-the-radar blues history, and — boom — Haddix. What he has always done so well has been his steady merger of classic blues structures with smooth R&Bstyle singing. He makes the blues accessible to anyone willing to listen and, inevitably, dance. And having been playing guitar since he was 7, the dude can tear it up quite nicely. He once told a music writer, “I am the best that I can be, and since no one else can be me, there’s none better.” Right on. 8 p.m., $15. Nighttown. (Sandy) Danity Kane: 8 p.m., $27.50 ADV, $30 DOS. House of Blues. Diecast/I Am Heresy/Impending Lies: 7 p.m., $10-$13. The Rock Factory. Horrible Fest Death Finale Show with The Hussy/Wooly Bullies/Teen Vomit/ Swirly in the Fryer: 4 p.m., free. Now That’s Class. Horrible Fest Morning After Pill Party: Yankee Peddler/Wetbrain/Real Regular/ Aggressive Response/MC HomelessPeaks Ohio: 6 a.m., free. Now That’s Class. Marc’s Great American Rib Cook-Off & Music Festival: Taking Back Sunday: 9:15 p.m. Jacobs Pavilion. Memorial Day Massacre with the Last Ten Seconds of Life/Demolisher/Death of an Era/Clarity Calls Forth/Alaskan/Seek Shelter/Affairs/Sterilizing the Deceased/ The Event Horizon: 6 p.m., $10. The

Foundry. The Memories/The Lemons/Street Gnar/ Ma Holos/Ricky’s Heart: Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Neighborhood Night with Manhattan Beach Project/Dan Bode/John Stebal/Al Moses/Joseph Allen Beltram: 7:30 p.m., $13 ADV, $15 DOS. Beachland Tavern. Pujol/Froth/Cheap Clone: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Rocket 88s: 6 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Something Involving a Monkey/XMembers/Third World Leader/Bound By Fate/Infalling/Mr. Denton On Doomsday: 7 p.m., $6. Agora Ballroom. Triage: 3 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Tropidelic/Wanyama/Vibe & Direct/ Gnosis: 9 p.m., $10. Grog Shop. John D. Watkins/J’Pennelope: 8:30 p.m., $15. Beachland Ballroom.

mon 05/26 Bane: 7 p.m., $12 ADV, $14 DOS. The Foundry. Marc’s Great American Rib Cook-Off & Music Festival: Blackberry Smoke: 6:15 p.m. Jacobs Pavilion. Jonn Ones/Neon Don & Eva Dilcue/ Pamela Machala: 6:30 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern.

tue

05/27

wed 05/28 Bastille: Since forming in 2010, this British band has taken the U.K. by storm. It’s sold more than 2 million albums there and won a number of Brit Awards for last year’s Bad Blood. A performance early this year on Saturday Night Live has helped the

For more information on our organic growing programs,

All the concerts you should see this week.

t @cleveland_scene

visit www.sfntc.com

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Black Star Riders (The New Thin Lizzy)/ Hemi Devils/X-Members: 7 p.m., $17 ADV, $20 DOS. Agora. Glass Cloud/Along Came a Spider: 6:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. The Foundry. Katie Herzig/Elizabeth & the Catapult/ Leah Lou & the 2 Left Shoes: 7:30 p.m., $13 ADV, $15 DOS. Beachland Ballroom. Open Mic Night with Will Cheshier: 8 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. Skrillex/Dillon Francis/What So Not/ Milo & Otis: 6:30 p.m., $49.50. Jacobs Pavilion. True North Big Band: 7:30 p.m., $10. Vosh Club.

group nurture a stateside audience. Songs such as “Overjoyed” and “These Streets” sound like a cross between Coldplay and American Authors. Live, the band might come off as a bit too precious but here’s to hoping they don’t refrain from going from something a bit grittier than what they do in the studio. 8 p.m. Masonic Auditorium. (Niesel) Future: The Atlanta-bred rapper Future is an up-and-coming star of the rap game whose outstanding production elevates the Dirty South aesthetic to match his unique voice. Whether leaning on the slurred rap flow on tracks like “Honest” or interjecting auto-tuned hooks on “I Won” and giving a sharp vocal attack on “Move That Dope,” Future is a vocal chameleon. His latest record, Honest, features a host of rap icons like Pharrell, Andre 3000 and Kanye West, but none of them overpower Future’s ill style. 8 p.m., $29.50-$35. House of Blues. (Stoops) Uptowne Buddha/SassafraZ/After Funk: Hailing from Toronto, After Funk is diving into their first U.S. tour dates right now. Tonight, they arrive in Cleveland. With a strong debut EP now under their belts (mixed and mastered by Soulive’s Alan Evans), the band is ready to really ramp up their commitment to the craft. The past few years, they’ve been honing their chops on their home turf; as they head out into the wider world, they’re sure to mingle well with bands of a similar ilk (Snarky Puppy, to some degree, even). They’re the openers on tonight’s bill that features Uptowne Buddha and SassafraZ. 9 p.m. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. (Sandy) 10 X 3 Hosted by Brent Kirby (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Ahptimus Prime/Peerless/K Von/Riz Leigh/Dre Mickel/Magik/DJ Eso/Don Toine: 8:30 p.m., $5. Grog Shop. Hot D’Jang/Blues Chronicles: 8 p.m. Barking Spider Tavern. The Howlin’ Brothers/TexasPlant: 8 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Beachland Tavern. Muscle Worship/CRTVTR/Ground is Lava/Runaway Brother/Jesse Sloan: 9 p.m., $5. Now That’s Class. Pat Travers Band/T.B.S./Blackstone/Rick Ray Band: 7 p.m., $20 ADV, $24 DOS. Agora Ballroom. Ex-Cult/Obnox/Ancestral Pearls: 10 p.m., $5. Happy Dog.

55 Cleveland Scene 05-22-14.indd 1

4/16/14 8:59 AM

H o st e d by Sa m Syl k a nd Co rkSk ro o “ The m a S Te r mind”

Showtime

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

8:00pm

DELLA MAE 6/05

CaBinET & dRiFTwood nEw Music Monday

6/09

An EvEning wiTh

ThE MAvEricks 6/06

BlaCK LiLLiEs 6/11

Ralph STanlEy & ThE ClinCh MounTain BoyS FaREwEll TouR

6/07

DAviD wiLcox

lEgEnd nighT wiTh

John SEBaSTian 6/08

livingSTon TayloR

pluS SETh gliER

& ChERyl whEElER

6/12

6/14

175 E. Main St., Kent 330.677.5005 • www.facebook.com/TheKentStage Tickets @ http://www.kentstage.org/

Memorial Day Weekend Party H H

Live Music Fri-sat-sun-MOn Friday 5.23 • 8pm-12am

Velvet Shake saturday 5.24

Dueling Piano Show “T” & Rich • 2pm-6pm H H Schoolgirl Crush 8pm- 12am

sunday 5.25

MOnday- MeMOriaL day 5.26

Armstrong Bearcats 1pm- 5pm

OTHER UPCOMING EVENTS Friday, may 30th • 5 pm

Saturday, July 19th

Great Lakes Glass Giveaway Whiskey Island 80’s On The Lake

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Shadeflex Reggae 1pm-5pm Colin Dussault Blues Project 8pm-12am

HAVE A PICNIC, RElAx & ENjoy

NO COVER

LIVE MUSIC

barkingspidertavern.com

LIVE ENTERTAINMENT Thus. May 22 • 9:00pm

CoMEdy NIghT!

FINALS hosted by Chad Zumock! Fri. May 23

Cleveland orchestra 6:00pm

Thursday May 22

Friday May 23 George Foley & Friends 5:30pm (jazz) The Del Rios 8:00pm (orig. surf/lounge garage) Tom Shaper & Friends 10:00pm (jazz blues)

Saturday May 24 Rio Neon 8:00pm (folk/rock) Blonde Boy Grunt & the Groans 10:00pm (singabilly/folk)

Sunday May 25 11310 Juniper rd., Cleveland • 216.421.2863

Sat. May 24

Ed Klaehn 6:00pm

HORRIBLEFEST #9

9:00pm Sun. May 25

SIN Night!

8:30pm

Tues. May 27

True North Big Band 7:30pm

Get $38 pass at the bar Go to horriblefest.com for more info TH 5/22 8PM HORRIBLE FEST NITE 1 (Opening party show) ICEAGE/ BUCK BILOXI / PROSTITUTES / OBNOX / QUEEN OF HELL / UNIFORM / FAT VEGAN / MR. CALIFORNIA & ZACK THE RIPPER / CRUELSTER FR 5/23 5-8PM HORRIBLE FEST BBQ & WING EASY THE WINGTONES / BURGER BOYS / MR. CALIFORNIA FR 5/23 8PM HORRIBLE FEST NITE 2 SECRET PROSTITUTES / COUNTER INTUITS / HOMOSTUPIDS / WETBRAIN / HEP Z / UNHOLY TWO / BASEMENT BOYS SA 5/24 NOON-2PM HORRIBLE FEST PRE-MATINEE PARTY

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

SA 5/24 2PM H-FEST MATINEE & BBQ @ CASTLE GREATSKULL, VILE GASH / MANGINI/ HANK WOOD & THE HAMMERHEADS / WORLD DOMINATION / DEGREASER / CRACKED CUP / PARTY PLATES / ROYAL BLOOD plus outdoor BBQ, BYOB SA 5/24 8PM HORRIBLE FEST NITE 3 GARY WRONG GROUP / DESTRUCTION UNIT / S.H.I.T. / HANK WOOD & THE HAMMERHEADS (NYC) / LUMPY & THE DUMPERS / CLASSHOLE / BAD NOIDS / SHORT RABBITS SU 5/25 6 AM 6 AM H-FEST MORNING AFTER PILL PARTY, YANKEE PEDDLER / WETBRAIN / REAL REGULAR / AGGRESSIVE RESPONSE/ MC HOMELESS-PEAKS OHIO SU 5/25 4PM FREE 4 BAR SHOW (Horrible Fest death finale show) This the very end we swear! w/ THE HUSSY / WOOLY BULLIES / TEEN VOMIT / SWIRLY IN THE FRYER

nowthatsclass.net 58

1414 RiveRSide dRive Lakewood 216-767-5202 • Voshclub.com

BAND OF THE WEEK

Stephan Lee Rich & Sandy Anding 8:00pm (singer/songwriter) Vicki Chew 10:00pm (folk rock)

Triage 3:00pm (singer/songwriter/blues) Rocket 88’s 6:00pm (rockabilly)

9:30pm

MUSIC

216.221.8576 • 11213 Detroit Ave

Something Involving a Monkey MEET THE BAND: Joe P. (guitar, keyboards and vocals), BeZo (bass, keyboards vocals), Nick Ritz (drums, percussion, sampling) JUST MONKEYING AROUND: Joe P. and original drummer Todd Ankrom played in the Family Riot. When that band imploded in 2010, they recruited bassist/ kazoo player BeZo from Resist/ Blood Runs Dry. “Me and drummer Todd Ankrom and BeZo wanted to do something creative and goofy and heavy and unique,” says Joe P. “We started jamming and soon we were gigging all over the place. The name was BeZo’s creation that came about from a search engine online. We thought we could do a lot with that image. Ultimately, the joke is that it leaves you with a question mark: What the hell is this?” PROOF IS IN THE PUDDING: In the music video for the noisy “I’ve Got Pudding,” the band gets in a pudding fight while standing in Joe P.’s kitchen. “We wanted to have the most ridiculous thing to scream about on a grinding metal tune,” says Joe P. “So we wrote a New Jersey-inspired, Dillinger Escape Plan type of tune, and we yelled about pudding.” A LONG SHELF LIFE: Three years ago, Ankrom suffered a massive heart attack moments after a show and the band struggled to carry on without him. When the band did regroup and was finally

set to release its debut, its record deal fell through. The debut, The Wasteland, finally comes out this week. “We do everything backward and wrong,” says Joe P. “We’re finally releasing it 400 days after it was supposed to be released.”

WHY YOU SHOULD HEAR THEM: Songs like “I Was Hip Before You Were Born” feature thick bass lines and off-kilter vocals that suggest the band’s wide range of musical influences. “It’s other music,” says Joe P. when asked to describe the band’s sound. “Humor is really important. We get that from Frank Zappa and Gwar. You can’t take yourself too seriously. I love metal but I like other genres as well. Our sound is if System of a Down was heading north up Route 1 in California and Primus was heading south, and they crashed and fell into the ocean. What emerged would be Something Involving a Monkey.” WHERE YOU CAN HEAR THEM: reverbnation.com/ somethinginvolvingamonkey WHERE YOU CAN SEE THEM: Something Involving a Monkey performs with X-Members, Third World Leader, Bound By Fate, Infalling and Mr. Denton on Doomsday at 7 p.m. on Sunday, May 25, at the Agora Ballroom. — Jeff Niesel

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

ROCKSINO:

GAMING&ENTERTAINMENT

FRIDAY, JUNE 13 8 PM TICKETS AT THE ROCKSINO BOX OFFICE OR TICKETMASTER.COM

10777 NORTHFIELD ROAD | NORTHFIELD, OH 44067 | HRROCKSINONORTHFIELDPARK.COM FACEBOOK.COM/HRROCKSINONP | TWITTER.COM/HRROCKSINONP FOR FREE, CONFIDENTIAL HELP 24/7, CALL THE OHIO RESPONSIBLE GAMING HELPLINE AT 1.800.589.9966.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Jonathan Butler

Live entertainment Fri. May 22 the Bag Brothers Sat. May 24 MEMORIAL WEEKEND PATIO PARTY

Choice (2 of 4 meats)Smoked Brisket, Wings, Rib Tips and Caribbean Jerk Chicken w/sides only $12 - Drink Specials

THURSDAY

KARAOKE

w/ DJ

HOT SAUCE

MONDAYS

OpEN MiC JAM NigHTS

Country Mile from 2-4 pm Broken English 5-9 pm DJ dNYCe 9:30 - 1pm

Fri. May 30 My Manic Episode Sat. May 31 Less Than 88 Sat. June 7 CLE House PartyBoogie Invitational Fri. June 13 Gary Ray Sat. June 14 Poppa D & the Aggravators

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

« 786 Front St, Berea | lakecitytavern.com | (440) 234-1010 «

alWays oPeN For sWiMMiNg aNd caMPiNg

Festival schedule 2014 NelsoN ledges Quarry Park May 30 - JuNe 1st

Friday JuNe 13th - 15th

grateFul Fest MidsuMMer saMBa July 11-13th

4th oF July - July 6th

JoNesFest suMMer hookah July 25 - 27th July 31-august 3 est Fest august 29th-sePteMBer 1st suMMerdaNce July 19th

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

classic Fest

sPriNg BadFish!!!

MUSIC

NOW HEAR THIS

NEW SOUNDS

Coldplay

Phillip Phillips

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Ghost Stories

Conor Oberst

Behind the Light

(Capitol) coldplay.com

(19 Recordings/Interscope Records) phillipphillips.com

THESE BRITISH ROCKERS EMERGED nearly 20 years ago as a kinder, gentler answer to Radiohead. In spite of those derivative tendencies, they’ve managed to find a strong foothold. The band’s albums regularly go platinum, and the group has won a number of Grammys. Their latest studio effort is the band’s sixth overall and first in three years. Despite working with cutting edge electronica producer and DJ Avicii, the album doesn’t have any real surprises. Reportedly a breakup album (singer Chris Martin and his wife, actress Gwyneth Paltrow, split at the time of its recording), it features the usual quotient of somber ballads. With soft drumbeats and whispered vocals, “Magic” shows off Martin’s soulful side; with hushed vocals and gently percolating keyboard riffs, “Midnight” sounds like vintage Coldplay. Ghost Stories certainly isn’t a bad album but it’s not as dramatic a departure as most reviewers would have you think. — Jeff Niesel

WHEN SINGER-SONGWRITER PHILLIP Phillips, winner of Season 11 of American Idol, wound up with a hit album, it almost seemed by accident. “Home,” the single released in 2012, racked up platinum sales. It sounded so much like a Mumford & Sons song, you had to wonder if fans even knew it was Phillips singing. His followup album sticks with the tried-and-true. Album opener “Searchlight” features a predictable pattern of vocals that alternate from whispers to screams. “Raging Fire,” the album’s first single, doesn’t deviate from formula either as Phillips croons, “Come out, come out, come out/won’t you turn my soul into a raging fire.” The clichéd lyrics make reference to losing control and don’t make Phillips come off as a particularly sharp lyricist. “Fly” sounds a bit edgier but doesn’t redeem the album or suggest Phillips will emerge as more than a one-hit wonder. — Niesel

Upside Down Mountain (Nonesuch) conoroberst.com EARLY CONOR OBERST RECORDINGS show just how harsh the guy’s voice could be. His self-released debut, 1993’s Water, was particularly rough around the edges. But with the folk ensemble Bright Eyes and on his solo albums, Oberst has established himself as an artist who matters; and his voice has softened over the years too. “Time Forgot,” the gentle opener to his latest studio offering, is a beautiful ballad as Oberst’s quivering vocals convey the song’s emotional depth. Not all the songs here are so pensive. “Zigzagging Toward the Light” features call-andresponse vocals and has a steady folk-rock beat, and “Night at Lake Unknown” has echoes of early Dylan. This album still won’t give Oberst the mainstream exposure he deserves — the songs are simply too introspective and devoid of hooks for that — but it’s a strong showing from an artist who continues to live up to the billing as a modern-day Bob Dylan. — Niesel

C-NOTES POETRY IN MOTION Local rapper Javon “Chief Network” Bates has just published My Deepest Pleasure, a book of poetry, and from 3 to 5 p.m. on Saturday, May 24, at Fears Confections (818 East 185th St.), he’ll introduce the soundtrack for the book at a charity event for the American Heart Association/American Stroke Association. Bates’ T.E.G. & Dreamer Publishing will donate 10 percent of the proceeds to the AHA/ASA charity. The soundtrack features spoken word poetry, R&B, pop, folk and hip-hop

from local acts such as 1 Hun it, Carl E. Story, Pierre Stone, Rachel Shortt, Smoove Gotti, Yumi and Ricwil. Anthony D. Phillips Jr. will also perform. Tickets are $10 in advance and $12 at the door. Find more info at tomahawkentertainmentgroup.com.

Freddy DeMarco is no novice; he also heads up DeMarco’s School of Music, Hudson’s answer to the School of Rock. Go to rockinontheriver.com for more info on the concert and go to demarcosschoolofmusic.com for more info on classes.

FOR THOSE ABOUT TO ROCK

MUSIC CITY MAN

Dirty Deeds U.S.A., a local AC/ DC tribute act, kicks off Rockin’ on the Rivers’ Friday concert series at 5 p.m. on May 23. The summer series draws huge crowds to Riverfront Centre in Cuyahoga Falls. Band leader

The Renaissance Hotel chain tries to expose up-and-coming artists with its R Life concert series. At 6 p.m. Friday, May 23, Nashville-based singer-songwriter Chris Carpenter will perform at the Renaissance in

downtown Cleveland. He comes from a musical family — his grandfather owned a recording studio and produced gospel records, his uncle Paul Martin produced his first CD and currently plays bass with Marty Stuart and the Fabulous Superlatives. Carpenter regularly plays with a full band but tonight’s show will be acoustic featuring Carpenter on guitar and vocals and John Mattick on piano. — Jeff Niesel

jniesel@clevescene.com t @jniesel

Your Destination to kick off SUMMER this Memorial Day Weekend! THE HOTTEST BANDS & DJs ALL WEEKEND LONG! FRIDAY

SATURDAY

DJ JUSTIN NYCE

JUKEBOX HEROES 5-9 & DJ DONKIS

SUNDAY

MONDAY

JiMILLER BAND 5-9 & DJ MIMO

NOSTALGIA 3-7

Join Us After the Rib Cook-Off at Nautica

NEW HAPPY HOUR Monday thru Friday 3:30-6:30

Book your Banquets & Private Parties with a Beautiful Waterfront View! 216-861-6900 • shootersflats.com Follow us on Twitter @shootersflats Like us on Facebook facebook.com/shooterswestbank

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

•$5.50 Small Bites Menu •$2.50 Select Bottled Beer •$4.50 Bacardi • Pinnacle • Select Wines •$5 Rum Runners

216.621.7747

UNDERGROUND

Find your happy hour.

Download SCENE’s official happy hour app today!

PUB

Available @ No Charge

For Your Next Event

Call 216-621-7747 or email for details. LARGEST DOWNTOWN SELECTION OF CRAFT BEER infomaproom@gmail.com

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

1281 W.9th • WAREHOUSE DISTRICT

BREAKING NEWS. HOT OFFTHE INTERNET PRESS.

Only at clevescene.com SCENE

Large seLection of e-cigs and Liquid

sMoKe Zone ii

13034 Lorain Avenue • Cleveland 216-251-3425

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014 65

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

2 Domestics $ 00

Mon-Sat 2-8pm

Open Sundays @ 7pm

No Cover!

Full Kitchen Open Daily

Great Food! Saturday 3-9pm

$5.99 Steak Dinner 2 Drink Minimum • Dine In Only

Join Your Favorite Entertainer in Our

Private VIP Lounge

12820 brookpark rd. @ w. 130th • 216-458-1131 open 2:00pM-2:30aM Mon-sat • sUndaY 7:00pM - 2:30aM

NEVER MISS A BEAT. SCENE PODCASTS

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Real hook ups, real fast.

TRY FOR

Free

216.377.6292 Local Numbers: 1.800.926.6000 Ahora en Español 18+

www.livelinks.com

savage love

letters

a hole new world By Dan Savage

Dear Dan, I am a genetic male with recurrent questions about my gender identity. Straddling desires to maintain my stature in the professional world, keep my wife at my side, and become who I feel like I am, I have experimented with crossdressing, chastity, antiandrogens, and, prior to all that, steroids. My wife and I have reached a middle ground where I can pursue sexual and aesthetic androgyny. I have started wearing unisex clothes, stepped up cardio to sculpt a more feminine shape, and am getting hair removal done. My question: I want to keep my sex drive and sexual organs intact, but I want to urinate like a woman with no choice but to sit. There are body-modification communities out there that showcase this type of procedure (urethral reroute/relocation), but I don’t know where to start. Ideally, a legitimate urologist should do this type of work, but even with my gender-amorphous desires in play, I’m not sure I can put together a justification strong enough for a doctor. Any advice? Do you know any piercers who have done this kind of work? Seeking Insights That Take Erotic Rerouting Seriously

On the Lovecast, gets a secondopinion assist from Slate’s Dear Prudence: savagelovecast.com.

mail@savagelove.com t @fakedansavage

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

“Most urologists aren’t qualified to do this, let alone piercers,” said Dr. Keith D. Newman, a urologist and a Fellow of the American College of Surgeons. “So my main piece of advice for SITTERS is to have a urologist do this, preferably someone who has experience with this surgery.” The procedure you’re curious about — creating a new pee hole on your taint, behind your balls, which would leave you with no choice but to sit when you pee — is known as a perineal urethrostomy. “It’s one of the numerous steps involved in total gender-reassignment surgery,” said Dr. Newman. “SITTERS has to consider that there are potential complications and consequences that will arise from this altered anatomy.” And the biggest consequence is a heightened risk of urinary tract infections due to your shortened

urethra, SITTERS. The urethra, of course, is the tube that runs from our bladders, where urine is stored, to our pee holes. But urinary tract infections aren’t your only worry. “Any artificial orifice has a certain incidence of stricture,” said Dr. Newman. “So the opening might need frequent dilations or more surgery if this complication arises.” By “stricture,” Dr. Newman means “your new pee hole could shrink, narrow, and start to close up.” And by “frequent dilations,” Dr. Newman means “you could wind up shoving steel rods up your urethra to stretch your new hole back open — frequently.” And there’s more! “There may be less than full diversion of urine (some may still come out the end of the penis),” said Dr. Newman. “Similarly, urinary dermatitis may occur — that’s diaper rash — so perineal care and good hygiene will be a must.” Assuming you’re still interested after reading all that, SITTERS, how do you go about finding a urologist who’ll perform this surgery? You make appointments with qualified urologists, tell them what you want, and risk being turned away. “I believe that enough justification for the surgery exists — others may not,” said Dr. Newman. “But it’s the insurance company that will need convincing. And it sounds as if SITTERS is not yet convinced of the validity of this request, so counseling might be helpful.” One final note… “Ejaculation will occur through that new hole in a somewhat non-directable way — which could be fun or not,” said Dr. Newman. In other words, SITTERS, after you have this done, you’ll not only be peeing sitting down, you’ll also be coming all over the back of your sack.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

WARNING HOT GUYS! Cleveland

216.912.6000 Akron

330.315.3000 Canton

330.437.0100 FREE to listen & reply to ads!

FREE CODE: Cleveland Scene For other local numbers call

www.MegaMatesMen.com

2601

ADULT MASSAGE

:) :) ALL NUDE (: (:

MASSAGE, SHOWER & HOT TUB Credit Cards w/ discreet billing. Come to our CLEAN bedbug free & Cozy Safe/Secure Westside Studio. Come see Danielle M - F Or “THE COUGAR” *Discounts for Pre-Scheduling COME SEE THE COUGAR & HER CUB!!! Mon-Fri 11am-5pm 2 1 6 - 4 7 2 - 3 6 5 0 ** Not F/S

***JULIE 216.393.4541***

Private Discreet Relaxing Massage Table Awaits Selective POLITE WPM age 50+ only Donation: ONLY $130

ADULT SERVICES

AN EROTIC “MAN TO MAN” MASSAGE *HOTEL DISCOUNTS*

Let a man rub you down like only a man can! Full Body/ Full Service “Man to Man” Massage given by hot naked masculine white dude. 24 HRS Hotel & house calls welcome or stop by my Massage Studio. Versatile any scene. 2 guys also available. Low Rates. Well equipped and ready to play... Call 216-491-4501

NAUGHTY EXOTIC GIRLS FS 18-27 1/2 Hr. & 1 Hr. Sessions Prompt and Courteous Inbound/Outbound Call 216-396-6424

ADULT HELP WANTED ATTRACTIVE FEMALES

Looking for a good paying part time job w flexible hrs. If so call or text. 440-227-6575

PHONE LINES #1 CHAT IN CLEVELAND!

Try it FREE! 18+ 216.453.1000 / 440.709.1000 www.nightlinechat.com

$10 Buck Phone Sex

Live 1 on 1 1-877-919-EASY (3279) 18+

100’s OF SEXY LATINO SINGLES Meet Hot Latin Locals! Get your FREE trial! 18+ 216.626.7777 440.325.7777 www.questchat.com

ALL KINDS OF SINGLES Straight 216-912-2222 Curious 216-912-6000 FREE Code 3227, 18+

CALL NOW, MEET TONIGHT! FREE to try! 18+ 216.626.7777 / 440.325.7777 Other Cities: 1.888.257.5757 www.questchat.com

EXPLICIT CHAT WITH SEXY LOCALS

Get your FREE TRIAL! 18+ CALL The Night Exchange NOW! 216.502.4388 / 440.499.6400 www.nightexchange.com

FREE PARTYLINE

712-432-7968 18+ Normal LD Applies

FUN SEXY SINGLES

Send Message FREE! 216-912-2222 Use FREE Code 3229, 18+

Gay & Bi Local Chat!

1-708-613-2103 Normal LD Applies 18+

HOT LOCAL URBAN SINGLES!

oll D e i b r a B

Are looking to hook up now! Try it FREE! 18+ 216.367.1010 / 440.424.0303 www.metrovibechatline.com

LOCAL LESBIAN SINGLES Reply to Ads FREE! 216-912-6000 FREE Code 2643, 18+

MEET GAY & BI LOCALS

Browse & Respond FREE! 216-912-6000 Use FREE Code 2642, 18+

MEET LOCAL SINGLES FREE!

Meet Sexy Local Singles Tonight! Get your FREE TRIAL NOW! Must be 18+ CALL 216.902.3700 / 440.345.0015 www.lavalife.com

I cater to the man who knows what he wants...

310-848-5279

GET ON TO GET OFF

PRIVATE CONNECTIONS TRY IT FREE! 1-708-613-2100 Normal LD Applies 18+

SEXY HOT SWINGER’S LINE! 1-800-785-2833 1-800-960-4328 EROTIC PLAYGROUND! 1-888-660-4446 1-800-990-9377 HOT LIVE SEXY CHAT!!! 1-888-404-3330 1-800-805-8255 18+

WHERE SINGLES MEET

Listen to Ads & Reply FREE! 216-912-2222 FREE Code 3228, 18+

Find your happy hour. Download the official SCENE happy hour app today!

Try For Free

216-377-6300

More local numbers: 1.800.777.8000 Ahora en Español /18+

The #1 social network for men who like men

Grand Opening

TIGER SPA

420 West Market Street • Warren OH 44481 Directions: 80east exit 209 to 5east & West Market (7 lights & make a left)

330-373-0303 9am-12pm 7 Days a Week

Keep it Real hot talk, local singles

FREE TRIAL

216.377.6303 More local numbers: 1.800.811.1633 www.vibeline.com 18+

Dating Easy made

Cleveland

216.912.2222 FREE to Listen & Reply to Ads!

FREE CODE: Cleveland Scene For other local numbers call

1-888-MegaMates

24/7 Friendly Customer Care 1(888) 634.2628

18+

3285

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

All Major Credit Cards Accepted

Jonesin’ Crossword

“Make It Rain”-it’ll be your downfall. Matt Jones

Your premier choice for classy & fun entertainment providing first-rate entertainment for all occasion, including a wet & wild bachelor parties, divorce parties, birthday celebrations & retirement parties! Whatever the reason is that you request our services, rest assured that we have what you’re looking for! Our carefully selected adorable playmates cater to any occasion! We offer a diverse selection of exotic, classy, sophisticated & gorgeous ladies for you to choose from.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

ACROSS

1 Brother of Dubya 4 Does nothing 10 “And others” abbreviation 14 Let go 15 Fed. securities 16 1958 Chevalier musical 17 Actress Kirshner 18 Like some fibrillation 19 Agents under J. Edgar Hoover, informally 20 Put effort into test prep 22 Serviceability 23 Ex-R.E.M. lead 24 Hiccups, e.g. 27 “Dang straight!” 30 Certain Sooner 31 Problem while drying out 33 Backside 34 Not quite transparent 35 In-basket stamp: abbr. 37 Necklace part 39 Address for Bill and Ted 40 Detach 42 Become less hostile 44 Irish airline ___ Lingus 45 Research your blind date, say

46 Mister, in Rio 48 Polar expedition vehicle 49 10-rated Bo 51 Amateur 52 Bunk up 56 Cupid’s specialty 58 Bar in a steering mechanism 59 “32 Flavors” singer DiFranco 60 Attack of the flu 61 Leisurely walk 62 Alkali in cleansers 63 Barracks bunks 64 Where everything from the theme answers collects 65 Young bloke

DOwn 1 Impromptu concerts 2 Goes offstage 3 Reason cosmetology is a no-go? 4 “Freeze!” 5 Where sand and plastic shovels go? 6 When tripled, a 1970 war film 7 Make Kool-Aid 8 Abacus piece 9 Fashionable initials 10 Sandwich spread 11 Party in New York City? 12 Get better in barrels

13 Jeremy of the NBA 21 “Lock Up the Wolves” metal band 22 “___ and Away” 24 The two things tires do best? 25 “Harold and ___” 26 Nasty expression 28 Course for U.S. immigrants 29 “___ how I roll” 31 “Hugs not ___” 32 Carpentry joint part 36 Horse-drawn vehicles, despite their name 38 That naval vessel 41 Cosmetics aisle brand 43 Sweet-talk 47 Day division, in Venice 50 Great Rift Valley locale 52 In ___ (as found) 53 Alpaca group 54 Longtime Yankees nickname 55 Conked out 56 “Resurrection” network 57 Ranch call 58 Cough syrup amt. ©2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor jonesincrosswords.com)

Answers appear on page 74

Transportation Services $300 & UP FOR ALL JUNK CARS We pay cash for junk or unwanted cars. We tow them for free! 440-231-8114 Rich

***$350 & UP***

FOR ALL JUNK CARS. 216-322-0920

Merchandise For Sale BUYING PINBALL MACHINES

Jukeboxes, older slot machines, & older coin operated arcade type machines (working or not) 440-823-4057

Professional Services ATTORNEY *216.771.3966 DUI/DUS/Criminal/Divorce Bankruptcy. DEBT RELIEF AGENCY. 1st appt FREE! Payment plans. Call Jason Baker

AUTO INSURANCE

SR22/Bond BEST PRICES DAVID YOUNG INSURANCE 440-779-9800

CRIMINAL DEFENSE

(DUI, Misdemeanor & Felony) Former Prosecutor Now Fighting For You. Also representing PERSONAL INJURY victim. Attorney David Reuven Office:216-360-3000 Cell:216-338-8666

HERPES SUFFERER

Pen pals needed. Write PO BOX 391372 Solon, OH 44139

Rejuvenating Massage Therapy

THE MAILMAN

STOP LOOSING SLOTS!

minerals and other oil & gas interests. Send details P.O. Box 13557, Denver, CO 80201

UNCONTESTED DIVORCE $195 Plus Filing Fee, Attorney 216-.621.4100

Massage - Certified CARING MASSAGE

Days & Evenings, weekends. Warm candlelight atmosphere. Lakewood/West Suburbs Linda 216-221-5935

SETS, MINIS, FIGS and BULK

Builletin Board ADOPT

I COLLECT

Learn To Play Perfect Blackjack Strategy! Free 1st Lesson! Call 330-813-8808

for legos

Delivering The Best Massage! Call 216-252-3652 216-776-2702

A beautiful secure life of love awaits your baby through the gift of adoption. Alex + Tony (800) 838-0809 (Exp. Paid)

naked pictures of ELIZABETH TAYLOR & DONNA DOUGLAS 216-296-6378

I PAY $$$

Chagrin Blvd. Beachwood $60 hr / $80 hr 1/2 Tammy D 216-820-0623

WANTS TO PURCHASE

HOME BUYERS!!!

FREE MONEY!!! DOWN PAYMENT PROGRAM*

BUY YOUR DREAM HOME!!! Plus Get Up To $100k + More*

JP 440-339-4591 cASh For LEGoS

Professional Services

(for new kitchen, new roof, new carpet, appliances, paint, basement waterproofing, windows, heating & cooling)*

NEVER EVER EVER BEEN A BETTER TIME TO BUY A HOME!!! Great Low Fixed Interest Rates* When your dreams come true... our dreams come true!!!

440.342.7355 (SELL)

THE OCEAN CORP.

To Buy...or Sell

10840 Rockley Road, Houston, Texas 77099. Train for a New Career. *Underwater Welder. *Commercial Diver. *NDT/Weld Inspector. Job Placement Assistance. Financial Aid available for those who qualify. 800-321-0298.

Call Grizzell COMING SOON YOUR MUSIC. UNPLUGGED.

*Some restrictions may apply *for those who qualify... we consider...

good credit • bad credit • bankruptcy

Get fit. Get paid.

Drivers Class A

For part-time Package Handlers at FedEx Ground and Home Delivery, it’s like a paid workout. The work’s demanding, but the rewards are big. Come join our team, get a weekly paycheck, tuition assistance and break a sweat with the nation’s package delivery leader.

CDL CLASS A COMPANY DRIVERS - Elyria, OH -

$1,000 SIGN-ON BONUS $56,000+ per year

Part-time PACKAGE HANDLERS

Cardinal Logistics is currently seeking CDL Class A Company Drivers with reefer and tanker experience to deliver to Dedicated customers out of Elyria, OH with new equipment 2013 tractors. Great Benefits: Medical/Dental/Vision, Prescription, Life Insurance Paid Vacation & Holidays, 401(k) with company match Requirements: 1 year verifiable experience on same equipment in last 5 years; HazMat endorsement required Class A CDL and clean MVR Minimum 23 years old

www.watchasort.com 330-659-2518 FedEx Ground 3201 Columbia Road, Richfield, OH 44286

Must be able to meet Canadian border entry laws.

Please call JOE at 888-471-9256 Or apply at: DriveForCardinal.com

Equal Opportunity/Affirmative Action Employer (M/F/D/V) Commited To A Diverse Workforce.

Fedex.com/us/careers

EEO

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Qualifications: • Ability to load, unload, sort packages •18 years or older • Part-time, 5-days week $9.73-$10.23/hr plus benefits to start, scheduled raises •Must pass background check

Puzzle appears on page 72

Women ages 45-65 are needed to participate in a 90-day clinical trial.

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Call 216-844-4444 for more information.

You can make a difference. If you are a post-menopausal female, you may be eligible to participate in a unique research study that promotes women’s health. Compensation provided.

For more information, contact the Clinical Trials Unit

216-844-4444

email info@case.edu. www.clevelandaids.org/ring

magazine • clevescene.com • May 21 - 27, 2014

Ad_Cleveland Scene 190514