FOMO Issue #3 by Thevillage

FOMO What’s gone down, who said what and what you should know…

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Issue #3

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THE VILLAGE VOICE I think it’s fair to say if I didn’t have The Village my marbles would well and truly have been lost during Corona. More snacks than any health specialist would ever advise, teens colonising every inch of our homes (and minds as we worry about their studies and all they’ve lost this year), the value of friendship becoming all the more apparent and always – the stories and words of hope and encouragement that we all need. As we enter level 2 (hello legal wine!) lets keep on supporting each other, our businesses, our communities and our kids into a new normal. Viva The Village!

IN CASE OF EMERGENCY

Villager Sue Torr of Crue Invest generously shared an Estate Planning File that should be a must for every family to have on hand and hundreds of you responded to it – what a brilliant must have! It includes essential info to save blood groups to insurance account details, retail accounts and your digital and social media logins and URL’s. Click here to download this invaluable tool or email sue@crue.co.za to send you a copy. PERSONAL INFORMATION FULL NAME MIDDLE NAMES SURNAME MAIDEN NAME (if any)

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Val’s food for (free) thought

Hiking in Nature. We are spoilt for choice in South Africa. Jodi Shneier Stamelman

My daughter is 4 and during lock down we started watching videos of her as a baby. She loves it and it’s such a nice thing to do together. Kim Kannemeyer

We loved how Val fired us up in remembering on how to make our own happiness.

Seriously, getting silly. My teens have invented ridiculous games with their friends like the song challenge - say 1 word and then sing the song that it makes you think of. Sam Brown

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Silver Screen Time

So many of you had amazing responses to calls for Netflix recommendations (see FOMO issue 2 for the list), these are the top 5 pre-teen friendly suggestions as voted by you. • Gilmore Girls • Anne with an E • Heartland • The Good Witch • Merlin

For more advice on age appropriate TV & movie viewing , visit www.commonsensemedia.o rg

HOPE FOR HOSPITALITY

“Being a parent is like folding a fitted sheet, nobody really knows how.”

40’S PARENTHOOD:

THERE IS HOPE & HAPPINESS!

This, from an anonymous Villager… ‘My husband and I clearly failed at social distancing during lock down. And you know what? Pregnant. Can I get some words of encouragement from some older moms…?’

ts in their and tax exper SECURITYexper INFORMATION

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OFF THE SHELF

This book came highly recommended and it’s one we can get behind How to Raise a Feminist is the ideal read for anyone, anywhere, unnerved by the pressure to be perfect; a ‘good enough’ guide to raising your children into gloriously gutsy, empathetic, likeable young people, irrespective of their gender. R215, Buy it here

Going for walks. Eating breakfast together or movie night at home. Family camp out in the lounge. Looking at the moon. Pancakes with choc chips for breakfast, Art. Julie Hall breakfast for dinner, learning a new board game or how to play poker for fun, a walk, a beach outing with a picnic, hiking in the mountains, a family movie, and during lockdown we even had famiky Zoom quizz evenings. Debbie Donaldson Basson 01

We know that there are so many Villagers among us reliant on the hospitality and leisure industries for their livelihoods. Tell us about your business and share the word. Also – hooray for Level 2!

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EVEN MORE THAN BEFORE

Advertorial The new development called Rad Shield ™ Mineral Suncreen – contains new generation version of proven ingredients Zinc Oxide and Titanium as well as groundbreaking Venuceane™ with its unique formula that combats sun and environmental damage to skin on 3 levels: 1 Broad Spectrum UVA and UVB defence 2 Infrared Defence 3 Antioxidant Defence

Iconic South African skincare brand Environ brings us a new product to support their scientifically proven findings to protecting skin in our climate

Embracing this philosophy using a quality easy-to-use product puts you at the forefront of taking optimal care of your skin while protecting it from the sun. With Rad Shield Mineral Sunscreen, less really is more. #lessmoremoreoften Recommended retail selling price: R435.00 Consult gayle@environ.co.za or www.environ.co.za for more information.

It’s all about #lessmoremoreoften We’ve all become conditioned to thinking that the higher the skin protection factor (SPF) in sun products, the more protected we are from harmful affects of the sun

and other environmental factors. But here’s the thing: higher protection sunscreens contain more aggressive chemicals that trigger free radical assault – that means ageing skin and nobody can get behind that! Dr Des Fernandes is South

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Africa’s most respected expert in the sun protection sphere – he developed Environ 28 years ago and remains at the forefront of global developments. Research is showing we need quality SPF at a lower number, SPF

with lower chemicals but applied more often. It’s why Environ has embraced a #lessmoremoreoften approach with their new RAD Shield Mineral sunscreen – less concentrated quality product applied more often.

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FOMO CAMP AMERICA

has been recruiting young people for over 50 years – it’s a safe and fun way to broaden horizons stateside – click here to apply QUEST AFRICA

is based in the Eastern Cape and is an adventure based, life skills practical module-based programme that many parents credit with the making of their kids. As borders open again, our children will begin to be able to spread their wings and WORKAWAY provides sound advice and guidance for applications to international programmes.

Gap Year 101 2020 has scuppered so many plans for those who planned to travel the world and take GAP years this year and possibly next year Thanks to all of you for the continued bright ideas and resources. Here are some stellar suggestions:

When your teen (REALLY) messes up If the question, is ‘where has my wonderful, caring, usedto-love-a-cuddle teen gone?’ Read on, dear Villagers…

There have been moments when my husband and I have lain awake and asked ourselves ( in my case, sometimes quite tearfully… ) “ How did THAT happen? Where is our gorgeous, easy going, problem-free X, Y, Z or Q? Who is this stranger?” So this is what I’ve learned, I hope it’ll help if and when you lie awake at 3am, wondering weepily, where you went wrong:

LOVELY CHILD 1 YOUR IS NOT GONE.

THE YOUNG MINDS ENTREPENEURSHIP PROGRAMME

is a Gap Year Program run by the University of Stellenbosch Business School and comes highly recommended by a few Villagers (one of whom is a respected teacher).

INFORMATION IS KEY

Not sure where to after matric ends? SA Career Guide

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If your child is at a loss as to what they want to do after school, what subjects the should be choosing or what options are available to them after school with their interests at heart…a number of Villagers recommended Human Essence as an excellent source of psychometric testing and career counselling.

Your child is not a criminal, a lost cause, a drug dealer for life, a failure, mentally ill with something incurable and life limiting. He or she is very much most probably - JUST A TEENAGER. Teenagers don’t neatly fit into their lives. Or yours. That’s the species. They are mostly uncomfortable, badly-fitting, badly behaved, challenging, disappointing, scary, worrying and quite repulsive. That is all normal. And in todays exposed and vulnerable world – some degree of f***-up that everyone knows about, (and gossips about,) is pretty normal, too.

Some of the world’s most important disruptors, contributors, movers and shakers, had revolting teen years, after all. The world we live in, offers both girls and boys a very narrow and restricted approved path through adolescence: A boy needs to be ripped, sporty, and academic, always confident, (how?!) popular and good-looking. A girl has to be thin and pretty, and thin and sporty and academic and popular, have 100 000 followers on Insta, and look good in bikinis. She has to both guard her reputation and date the head boy. They both have to be prefects. Hmm. That’s not the profile of many of my friends during their school days … don’t know about you? Oh wait. Except one! And he is, to the best of my knowledge, on the FBI’s Most Wanted List … wanted for massive fraud and suspected murder.

YOU ARE NOT 2 THE WORST PARENT ALIVE

Our teens remind us that the human condition is to be bruised and battered, but still beautiful.

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A DEEP BREATH 3 TAKE AND PARENT.

A friend who is a competitive mountain biker told me this beautiful piece of advice: When the terrain and the conditions are terrible – rely on your technique. If you do everything right, use the experience you have, the rules you know you need to apply and you’ll get to the bottom. So, when the proverbial hits the fan, do the following. Stay calm parental anxiety is a cancer. Don’t waste time beating yourself up. Apply consequences and learnings. Hold the kid. Make sure he or she knows you are not flattened, that you are still OK. Ask for help, use help. Try to stay optimistic. Get on with your life – show the kid that his or her foundations remain. Don’t lose your rag – be cross, but not out of control – mostly what teenagers need is boundaries – you can’t apply boundaries if you’re breaching them. Take a deep breath. This too shall pass.

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e c n a D y p p a H

It’s the dance sequence that’s taken the world by storm and made us proud to be South Africans all over again! THANK YOU to everyone who joined our hilarious and super fun The Village Zoom Jerusalema dance class in August! We should do it again!

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MEN O PAUSE…

the advice came pouring in Vanessa: OMGoodness. My husband lost kilos during lockdown ... guess who found them? And THEN some.

DISHWASHER DIARIES Some seriously practical advice

What you had to say… ‘Once women hit a certain age the golden rule is twice the exercise and half the calories. During lockdown, I think many of us found ourselves with half the exercise and twice the calories…’ d wise Kind an i om Tamm words fr er McAllist

These brands came out tops!

ot Bosch g otes! v over 40

• BOSCH “Definitely Bosch. We had one for 20 years and it died during lockdown and we went straight for Bosch again! So quiet and cleans perfectly!”, Janine Esterhuizen • MIELE “mine is 16-years-old and I’ve never had to call for service”, Frances Campbell • SIEMENS “I have had my Siemens for the past 30 years still going strong”, Esta Levitas

These Facebook Groups came recommended by you The Menopause Support Network (a large UK based group) & Menopause Support South Africa

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‘… if anyone is being delayed in their needs or in their wants, just know that a delay is not a denial’ – Elrize

We can relate

Villagers bought scores of cupcakes to support the Cornelius family, thank you!

VENTURING INTO VEGETARIANISM A growing number of Villagers (many prompted by their teens) are opting for plant-based diets. Carla Jordan shared her favourite (mainly) veggie recipe books to spark inspiration!

90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again...

After a series of delays and heartbreaking setbacks, Jordan Cornelius (our Villager Elrize’s son) got the call – the stem cells were ready and his bone marrow transplant is a go! Elrize, you have been so brave and we are behind you and Jordan and your family the whole way! Thank you to each and every Villager who supported Elrize’s cupcake sale to raise funds for the family while they undergo this epic journey.

It,s in the jeans...

HEALTH SHOTS

Now these are shots we can get behind for our teenagers – Sir Fruit has recently launched these brilliant vitamin and juice filled boosts. Perfect for Fortnite-fatigued teens, tweens who won’t look at a lovingly made lunchbox (heaven forbid) and that afternoon pickme-up all parents need! R18,99 at your favourite foods shops or direct online www.sirfresh.co.za.

THE VILLAGE CELEBRATES

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Your immune booster squad is here Packed with vitamins and minerals!

For home deliveries visit www.sirfresh.co.za

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Handy Hints

Stains Begone!

A ruined Billie Eilish hoodie (eina!) got everyone sharing their stain removal hacks The top votes went to good old-fashioned boereseep and regular sunlight bar. Handy Andy, toothpaste and good old bicarb also got the tried and tested stamp of approval!

TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS

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Admin Alert

The Village is so grateful to all of our voluntary subscribers. Just a heads up – if you change your card (or get a new one) – and you’d like to continue subscribing – you’ll need to sign up again. Thank you!

Dear 18year old me... With a whopping 569 comments, clearly a LOT of us wanted to cheerlead our younger selves…

Explore

if parenthood came with a gps it would mostly just say... recalculating.

IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR INSTANT POT?

Don’t quit!

t! Shake i

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Empty mug

with a spoon in it cardboard cake box

So many of you are…we are big fans too - this 7-in-1 pot is a slow cooker and a pressure cooker in one and can help so much time and money! Look out for the new 9-in-1 that will hit our shores soon. We find the Instant Pot South Africa Facebook page a mine of really useful advice – with so many tips for local dishes we all know and love.

Head to @home stores to buy your own pot that makes life so much easier. Prices start at R2199.

Food, right? Nope, we’ve got:

Empty

Reality check!

g Mea l P lannin Goa ls from y Villager Kath Matthews

Suburban Mysteries THINGS YOU’LL FIND IN A VILLAGER’S FRIDGE…

Yikes!

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Dump him...

Aunty Spatula and Oom Braaitongs

Thanks for sparking this hilarious post, Leigh, and for the photographic evidence! Leigh Pollock There you are, right under the mac and cheese tonight...

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FOMO

PROCEED WITH CAUTION!

Village Wa lks

Parenting teens is anything but predictable. Thanks for bringing the laughs, Sandy... guess it,s scrambled eggs for supper, then?!

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LITTLE HEROES EVERYWHERE

CONGRATULATIONS & CELEBRATIONS Carmen, you are an absolute inspiration to us all! Well done on your enormous achievement and thank you for your commitment to our communities – what would we be without the doctors and nurses who walk among us?

THIS! This is what

our Village is about. Kudos to Michelle Mcleod Smith for getting up and doing it – may there be many more Village walks in the months to come.

SLEEP SUPPORT Tarin asked for support for parents with kids on the spectrum, and especially around positive sleep patterns. So many of you came forward with advice, thank you Villagers for supporting each other so positively. • 'Maybe consider joining “ask me, I’m autistic” on FB. It’s very helpful. Be diligent to read the rules. They are more in depth to other groups'. • 'We found that a combination of melatonin,

Calmag mix at sleep time, a weighted blanket and wahlberger brushing helped'. • 'Join the Facebook group Autism Discussion Page'. • 'Weighted Blankets are brilliant'. • 'Definitely contact the NeuroDiversity Centre'. • 'Help my child' have courses that can help with understanding and discipline special needs kids’.

1547 posts 39 700 comments Members: 36 864 & count ing 114 600 react ions

Biscuitgate Who can relate?

s ... Thoin th m

The Village Classifieds

* As with all medical and supplement advice, consult your doctor first

Peak Place is a fully accredited student residence in Cape Town, with two premium locations in beautiful suburban Pinelands – only 5 kilometres from UCT and 3 kilometres from CPUT. We aim to provide a comfortable and safe environment for learners to live and socialise while studying away from home.

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Our Villager Karli Mackintosh melted our hearts this month with her entry into our @justjumpswimwear competition on our Instagram page. Zoe (left) shown with her sister Jemima has mild Cerebral Palsy, “she has had so many surgeries and daily struggles, but she is so kind, humble and brave”, says Karli. You go Zoe!

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