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The Clocktower September 16, 2020 Issue 3, Volume 95

Epic Major Battles of Union Selecting one major to rule them all

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hen it comes to the question of the best major, there’s no doubt in my mind it’s nursing. However, due to potential bias in my answer, I should probably present facts. But that just wouldn’t be fun, and we’re in the business of fun, literally. So, I’ll do the next best thing.

Imagine Epic Rap Battles of History without the rap and history parts, keeping the epic, and voila: Epic Major Battles of Union! In this intermittent series, I’ll be featuring two majors and having students in both majors answer questions about the other major. Sure, this probably won’t be very objective, but do we really need that? On top of that, every Wednesday with an article from this series, there will be a poll on the Clocktower’s Instagram page

(@clocktower_uc) where everyone can vote to choose a winner! For the series finale, we’ll have the top majors face off, and then crown the ultimate major.

I now present our first contenders: Nursing vs. Communication!

Question 1: What are ___ majors like?

“They over-analyze every conversation ever.” Alston Sibuea, Nursing

Dad Joke of the Week: What do you get when you have a nursing and a communication major in the same room?

A lot of debt...that’s it...there’s no joke...go ahead...you can cry...

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The official

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3 Adventist Slang

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10 Sports

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Politics

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Club Options

Pop Culture

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Union News Dating

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Editor – in – Chief Jovan Cross Assistant Editor Juliet Bromme Distributor Marvin Velasquez Media Manager Francisco Campos Photography Editor Joseph Lee Layout Editor Chrisheline Kalawo Assistant Layout Editor Justin Anderson

NEWS Editor Olivia Jacobs Photographer Max Lassel Adventist News Hannah Olin Union News Jade Covel Lincoln News TJ Pittenger

ENTERTAINMENT Editor Hannah Drewieck Photographer Andrew Schwartz Sports Joel Shetler Pop Culture Drew Hickman Comedy Sam Ortiz

LIFESTYLE Editor Maria Kercher Photographer Annabelle Harper Outlook Lacey Stecker Politics Alex Nesmith Love Kaitlynn Toay

“Nursing majors are people of myth and legend.

Rumor has it, if you say ‘I have so much to do. I’m so stressed,’ a nursing major will materialize to tell you how wrong you are in comparison to them.”

Lacey Stecker, Comm.

Question 2: What are some stereotypes about ___ majors?

“I’ve heard comm majors never had to crack open a book. Must be nice!” Anonymous, Nursing “Always studying; have no social life.” Juliet Bromme, Comm.

Question 3: At night, what do ___ majors tell themselves to go to sleep?

“That they will have job security to make them feel like their college career wasn’t a complete waste.”

Anonymous, Nursing “Finally time to sleep. *sets alarm for one minute*” Shiloh Baillou, Comm.

Question 4: Where are you most likely to find a ___ major on a Sunday?

“Either at a coffee shop talking it up with friends, or hiding cause I’ve literally never met or seen any of them.” Gabby Gibson, Nursing “Crying in the library, contemplating their existence and why they chose this major.” Drew Allen, Comm.

So, there you go. Who do you think is the winner between these two majors? Let us know on our Instagram poll today. See you next time on Epic Major Battles of Union!

Samuel Ortiz is a sophomore Nursing major from Orlando, Florida.

Adventist slang: dating edition Are you being asked out? Did he propose?

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dventist slang is possibly the most difficult form of short language to learn. Once you break into the Adventist community, it’s assumed you already know this information. Rarely do the Adventists of old take the time to explain to the newbies what our terms mean. I would like to see that change. Allow me the opportunity to guide you through some common terms Adventists use when dating and what they mean.

Vespers – A simple worship service, typically an hour or so on Friday nights. This is also an Adventist first date location. If a person invites you to vespers, you are being asked out on a date. It’s meant to be a classy, safe place for couples to begin the process of getting to know each other. If you aren’t romantically interested in the inviter, politely decline the invitation.

Banquet – A group date sponsored by an institution with an excessive number of third wheelers. It’s prom sans everything that makes prom fun.

There’s no dancing, Adventists are

only allowed to act as “gently swaying trees.” You “leave room for Jesus” (at least six inches) between you and your partner. This is another safe environment for a date, usually after you’ve been dating for a while.

Seminary – Essentially adventistsingles.com IRL. This is where young men go to become pastors and young women go to find a husband.

The men who go to seminary tend to be desperate to get married. Any girl who wants a man merely has to stand outside the building and wait. She will have at least three proposals in five minutes.

Watches – This is where it can get a little tricky. If you’re wearing a watch, there’s no need for alarm. Most people won’t think anything of it. If in conversation you hear someone comment, “She got herself a nice new watch,” they are saying the girl got engaged. If someone tries to give you a watch, that is a marriage proposal.

DO NOT ACCEPT A WATCH UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED FOR MARRIAGE. As you have most likely experienced, and have now seen, Adventist slang is complicated. It’s a language as old as, well, Adventists.

Hopefully, this guide has helped you, at least in the dating-sphere. *Special thanks to Robin Stecker (22, single and available) for this idea.

Lacey Stecker is a sophomore Communication major from Noblesville, Indiana ©aliexpress.com

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The most polarizing statements both candidates have said so far He said, he said

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o congratulate myself for being so unbiased for the past two articles, I’m going to be completely biased during this article.

I wanted to take a step back from national politics this week and focus on “Who said the more offensive thing so far in his political career.” Disclaimer: my thoughts and beliefs are not representative of the Clocktower or of Union College as a whole.

Biden, August 2019 - “Poor kids are just as bright as white kids.”

Back in 2019 during the Democratic primaries, Biden made this fun little aside. Poor kids can be smart. He quickly backtracked after he said it, including other ethnicities, but the damage was already done.

Biden, February 2007 - “I mean, you got the first mainstream AfricanAmerican who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.”

In 2007 during former President Barack Obama’s campaign run, Joe Biden decided this was the best way to describe Obama. I don’t think I need to explain why this is bad, so I

©Bloomberg.com

won’t. That’s a no from me, Joe. Biden, May 2020 - “If you don’t vote for me then you ain’t black.”

During an interview with Charlemagne tha God, Joe Biden made this remark that revokes a person’s skin color based on their vote. Biden did apologize for this statement later, saying he “shouldn’t have been such a wise guy” when talking about the future of America. Overall, I’m unimpressed with Joe Biden, and this statement only furthers my opinion.

Trump, July 2017 - “They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.”

This little racist comment by Trump during his presidential campaign struck a chord with a majority of his support base. Referencing immigrants from Mexico, he chose to portray America as for Americans, not immigrants.

Which is ironic, as America was built by immigrants. I stand unimpressed and disappointed.

Trump, October 2016 - “Grab them by the p***y.”

Who could forget one of President Trump’s most memorable sayings,

referencing what he does to women and how he feels about the idea of consent. Believe it or not, he still stands by this saying, having never produced an explanation or apology for this.

Disgusting.

Trump, July 2017 - “I like people who weren’t captured.”

During this interview, he was referencing war heroes and returning soldiers. With recent conflict surrounding his alleged comment on how fallen troops are “losers,” I thought it only fitting to show a pattern on this subject. There really doesn’t seem to have been any growth.

My final opinion on this matter is that, honestly, I don’t like either of these candidates. Neither has what it takes to unify this country or to handle it in a time of crisis or pandemic. There is no good option here...really.

Alexander Nesmith is a junior Communication Major from Calhoun, Georgia.

ON THE RADAR FRI. 9/18/20 - 9/19/20 Virtual Parent’s Weekend

SAT. 9/19/20

Painting Under the Stars with HHP

WED. 9/23/20

Team Shirts for Softball Event

THURS. 9/24/20 Library Fair

SAT. 9/26/20

All Night Softball

“Mulan,” except the old one A look back at the 1998 original

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was planning on reviewing the recent live-action “Mulan” remake made available on Disney Plus, but then I found out Disney is charging subscribers another $30 for what’s probably going to be another divisive, mediocre mess of a film. I don’t like supporting predatory practices in the film industry, especially if I know I’m not going to enjoy what I’m watching.

So today we’re looking back at the 1998 original. It came out six months before I was born! How cute is that?

“Mulan” is a well-revered film now, with “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” being probably its most easily recognized scene. To be fair, it isn’t a bad film. It obviously has nice, stylistic animation. I especially love how the explosions and fire are drawn to look like traditional Chinese art. It looks so dope! It’s also dope seeing Disney take such a forwardly feminist approach to a character arc, and I can actually buy a relationship between Mulan and Shang, because they didn’t click after two seconds and actually struggled before making an effort to be together.

However, I’d argue (along with many critics at the time) that this is among Disney’s less interesting films.

The soundtrack only has one catchy song (you already know what that is), and a lot of the side characters are incredibly obnoxious. Call me a radical but Mushu needs to take a chill pill.

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New and returning clubs provide exciting options for Union Students ©movieposters.ha.com

I got so tired of him piping up for no reason. The villain is only remarkable for his incurable jaundice, and overall the whole story plays out very formulaically. It has very few surprises to offer, and that combined with these other downsides makes it a good family film, but not much else.

All that said, I had a good time revisiting this movie. Just because something isn’t remarkable doesn’t make it bad, and “Mulan” is enjoyable.

I just enjoy other Disney movies far more. On the off chance that I actually watch the remake, I’m sure I’ll still find the animated version far more funny, visually interesting, and coherent. But for today, I’m satisfied with the movie I chose to watch.

Drew Hickman is a junior Communication major from Shawnee, Kansas.

A variety of clubs cater to multiple hobbies and interests this semester

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lubs are a big part of the social life at Union College. I interviewed a few of this year’s clubs to get an idea of what types of events we can be expecting this year.

Business and Computer Science Club (BCS) is one of the most popular, as they often have a lot of events and giveaways, including assisting in hosting Night Under the Lights at the end of the school year. This year their club sign-up booth was a big hit.

Danyelle Nesmith, a club officer, said, “We had one table for signing people up and another booth where you could play a dart game to win retro BCS shirts or candy/chips. The main feature was our NitroBurger food truck for members to enjoy. We were full on all three sides almost consistently!” As for events this year, they will organize several food events and are planning an outdoor movie showing among other COVID-19 acceptable events. They are working hard to serve the students and welcome other ideas for events.

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©Joseph Lee

An up and coming club this year is the Anime Club. Johnson Kahungu, one of the club’s three officers, told me a little about the perks of being a member. They meet twice a week to watch and discuss anime, as well as play anime video games. Also included are discounts on Japanese food and an awesome hoodie.

Another new club is the Education Club. Officer Kristin Sydow told me they have quite a variety of events planned. “The Education Club is full of mostly education majors who get together and hang out. We are all about socializing and having some fun treats while we are at it. We have ice cream, Chipotle, pizza feed, Barnes and Noble and hiking events planned for this year.”

I.R.R. Outdoor Club (IRROC) is a well-established club on campus, much like BCS. However, they focus on outdoor activities, which include a float trip and a hike to Indian Caves. They also plan an annual 9/11 memorial event. Last year there was a stair

climb, which has adapted to COVID-19 precautions to be a run instead. Officer Anna Hakes says “Even though it’s named IRROC, all majors are welcome.

We have a lot of fun and would love for anyone to join!”

Contact club officers to get more information and learn how to join.

Jade Covel is a senior Religion major from Topeka, Kansas.

WANNA WRITE? Contact us on social media (@theclocktowerasb) for paid freelance writing opportunities

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College View Church provides multiple ministry and service opportunities Students who want to get involved in their church communities have options to choose from

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etting involved in ministry and service opportunities is a great way to reach out and help others while meeting new people and growing friendships. If you are interested in serving and want to find ways to get out and help others, look no further than just across the street!

College View Church is looking for people who are excited to serve. They have several great opportunities, so there is something for everyone! » Do you enjoy being around kids of all ages, teaching or just being a part of children’s ministries? If so, this might be the fit for you! The Earliteen, Junior and Youth Sabbath Schools are looking for help in their classes each week. If you are interested, contact Pastor Mic Henton. » Maintenance and upkeep are vital to ensuring the church is fit for use. If you enjoy maintenance work and keeping things looking clean and beautiful, College View would love volunteers to help with church maintenance. If you would like to serve in this way, contact Pastor Micheal Paradise. » A warm smile and a friendly word can go a long way! Right now, the church is in urgent need of greeters to welcome members and guests every Sabbath. If you enjoy making people feel welcome and comfortable, contact Lowell Hadley.

©Savannah Fortney

» Music ministry is an exciting and fun way to both serve others and praise God. If you would like to use your voice or musical talents to bless others, this is the perfect ministry for you! Contact Pastor Sullivan Dutra if interested » Have you ever thought of starting a small group? Do you enjoy discussion and connecting with a small group of people? If so, the Young Adult Ministry is looking for young people who would like to lead out in small groups. Contact Pastor Guadalupe Montour if you are interested. » Book clubs are a great way to connect with others, fellowship and discuss new ideas. If you are interested in starting or leading out in a book club, contact Pastor Guadalupe Montour.

Hopefully, this gives you some ideas on how you can get involved in local ministry and service. Contact information for each of the pastors is on the CVC website. Don’t forget to check out other local churches and ministries to see if there are more ways you can reach out and help those around you!

Hannah Olin is a sophomore History Education Major from Princeton, Illinois.

Modern day dating Virtual dating

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tips and tricks

irtual dates have become significantly more popular in the last few months, and people have been getting creative with how they can spend time together and keep things interesting. Services like Zoom or FaceTime make it possible for us to spend time together without being in the same location. If you’re tired of talking about your day and looking for different virtual activities, check out some of the suggestions below.

1. Watch a TV show or movie together. Sometimes in a long-term relationship, you want to spend time together but run out of things to do. It can be nice to just be in the presence of your significant other without feeling the pressure to talk. While in different locations, services like watch parties are becoming popular among many streaming services such as Netflix, Disney+, Hulu and YouTube. This feature allows you to watch the same content as your significant other, creating a feeling of connection. You can chat about the movie or TV show over text as you watch together in real time.

2. Cook a meal together. Though distance makes it hard to actually share your meal with each other, you can buy the same ingredients and make a dish via Zoom. Set up your webcam and start cooking! When you’re done, you both will have a delicious meal that you can sit down and enjoy together, regardless of the distance.

3. Go on a virtual tour. In our current world, traveling is not encouraged. However, you can still

go on exciting adventures virtually via the Internet. Easily accessible tours of places such as the Louvre, the San Diego Zoo and Walt Disney World offer virtual tours of their locations for free online. Call each other and explore a few of these places together. This can allow you to experience new adventures when it is impossible to physically be together.

It can be difficult to stay connected to your partner sometimes, especially with all the pressures our world is facing today. Trying something new and creative can help you connect on a different level and experience new adventures together. If you are looking for something new to try on your virtual date nights, give one of these suggestions a try!

©travel.earth.com

Kaitlynn Toay is a senior English major from Edgeley, North Dakota.

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Introducing Warriors Volleyball

Volleyball may look different this year, but Warrior pride doesn’t have to

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he Union College Women’s volleyball team is practicing and gearing up for a shot at the upcoming season. Andrea Jensen is the new Warriors volleyball coach, accompanied by assistants Hophni William and Zachary Hyde. These coaches are optimistic about the season, hoping that the games will still take place and that players will continue to stay safe.

Although COVID-19 has altered practices, games, fans and student life, it has not affected intensity of practices. Hophni William said, “We have a great new coach and the team is learning and improving a lot.” They are continuing to practice several times a week to prepare for their first game.

Although most sports are facing more limitations, the team is very excited for the opportunity to play this season.

Although the team is still able to practice, they are not untouched by

©Union College Marketing

difficulties due to COVID-19. William also said that the season would be difficult because of playing other teams from other states. Each state has their own COVID-19 regulations and procedures which can easily complicate situations. They have to do their research on each state, area and team that they play to ensure safety of all players. To help control the spread of COVID-19, all players are required to take a COVID-19 test to make sure that they are healthy and able to play.

What will games look like for the Warrior fans? To comply with COVID-19 regulations, some volleyball games will be held at Speedway Village to accommodate the mandatory six foot physical distance requirement. The facility is only 12 minutes away from campus, off Highway 2 and Van Dorn.

Hophni William said that the team will be communicating through social media and the calendar to update the campus on how to support the Warriors volleyball team. Look out for updates and get ready to show your Warrior pride!

Joel Shetler is a jnior Science Education major from Ruckersville, Virginia.

Scavenger hunt company provides COVID-19 friendly activities Let’s Roam activities were designed to help people around the world explore, discover, and connect

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uarantine is not fun. Sometimes the best thing to do is get outside and do something. Maybe you want to do something with your friends as a team.

Maybe you want to go around Lincoln and see some sights. I have the answer for you.

Let’s Roam is a scavenger hunt company that has created experiences in 400+ cities around the globe, including Lincoln. The “Capitol to Campus” scavenger hunt is one starting from the Capitol here in Lincoln and ending at the University of Nebraska campus with several historic and beautiful sights.

I was able to talk to Kelly Diehr, head of Let’s Roam public relations. We were able to talk about their goals with this hunt. When talking about its location, she said, “Why not combine the Capitol area and campus area because of the amount of history in the area? We would be able to make something great for visitors and students alike.” Their goal was to create something for everybody to enjoy. If you were new to Lincoln or if you lived here your entire life, you would enjoy yourself and even see something new. “One of the main things we hear from locals and visitors is that most of what they see is things that they might not know about.”

On the hunt, players have the opportunity to see amazing historic landmarks in Lincoln. Taking about two hours, there is the chance to see different shops and hot spots in the area. Players can also pause the hunt if they want to stop at

a specific spot without affecting their final time.

The beauty of the hunt is that it is a social distancing activity. On the hunt you never need to go inside anywhere or touch anything. You are encouraged to go as a team, but no larger than ten people. “People couldn’t really leave because of quarantine.

Now that people are outside, people are looking for a social distancing activity which is what we are,” said Diehr.

The hunt can take place anytime throughout the year. All one has to do is buy tickets, which are $13 per person, and everything else will be provided. It makes a great date for couples or a cool activity for groups of friends. Each person can choose roles such as “The Photographer” or “The Brainiac” and each role has its own purpose, making the hunt even more fun.

The team with the best time and most points gets first place and bragging rights.

©Max Lassel

TJ Pittinger is a sophomore Theology major from Gilson, Illinois.

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https://www.puzzles.ca/sudoku/ The Clocktower encourages reader feedback and strives to maintain accuracy. If you have comments, please email us at cltower@gma ltower@gmaiil.com l.com.

The Clocktower, established in 1927 and sponsored by the Associated Student Body of Union College, is published semi-weekly during the fall and spring semesters.

The opinions expressed are the opinions of the writers and are not to be construed as the opinion of the editors, Associated Student Body, Union College, or the Seventh-day Adventist Church.

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