March 26 2014, The Courier

THE

COURIER

COLLEGE OF DUPAGE STUDENT NEWSPAPER \\ 26 MARCH 2014 \\ VOLUME 49, ISSUE 25

WISH YOU WERE HERE

SPRING BREAK EDITION: FESTIVALS | FOOD | FASHION | FUN + WHAT TO DO IF YOU’RE STUCK AT HOME

NORTH CENTRAL COLLEGE Recognized nationally as one of “America’s Best Colleges” by U.S. News & World Report.

Ranked among one of Forbes magazine’s “America’s Top Colleges.”

Join us for our TRANSFER VISIT DAY Saturday, April 26, 9 a.m. - 1 p.m.

Here’s what we have planned for you: Presentation topics include: s

Academic Highlights

s

Introduction to Student Services

s

Transfer Admission and Financial Aid Overview

s

Student Panel

You will also have the opportunity to meet our faculty and take a walking tour of our beautiful 65-acre campus.

To learn more about how you, too, can be central, call us to set up an individual appointment at 630-637-5800 or visit us at northcentralcollege.edu/transfer.

2 // codcourier.org // 26 March 2014

To register, just call us at 630-637-5800 or register online at northcentralcollege.edu

NORTH CENTRAL COLLEGE WILL BE AT COLLEGE OF DUPAGE ON: April 8, 9:30-12:30 April 16, 9:30-12:30 April 24, 9:30-12:30 April 30, 9:30-12:30 These visits are located on the second floor of the SRC near Campus Central.

WHAT’S

INSIDE

5 6 9

FA R M S H U T D O W N S PA R K S OUTRAGE

P O I N T- C O U N T E R P O I N T: RESPONSE TO CRIMEA CRISIS

OPINIONS: FA R M + F R I E N D S H I P

11

S U M M E R F E S T I VA L GUIDE

15

SPRING BREAK IN THE SUBURBS

16

CHICAGO JAZZ PHILHARMONIC AT T H E M A C

18

REVIEWS: SKRILLEX + M U P P E T S M O S T WA N T E D

19

S P R I N G AT H L E T I C SCHEDULE

Achieve More.

Together.

We offer more than 80 undergraduate majors and programs of study, adult accelerated degree completion programs and 25 graduate programs.

We seek to develop strong, capable graduates who build successful careers.

Our most popular transfer majors include aviation, criminal/ social justice, education, nursing, healthcare leadership, and business.

EDITOR’S NOTE

W

hen I initially sat down to write the editor’s note, I thought surely I would dust off a funny anecdote about ‘that one time at a festival.’ Recalling either the time my brother had an impromptu night out with Skrillex at a casino in London, or perhaps reminisce about how hysterical it was when I literally ran into and fell to the ground with Joel Zimmerman (deadmau5) in a Vegas hotel, a la Wild E. Coyote.

However, my focus was totally redirected upon hearing about the shutdown of the Community Education Farm on campus. If there’s one takeaway this generation is learning by going to festivals, it’s the value of community. Beit one night or a few days, the camaraderie at these weekend events reminds us that past life’s stressors, there are good times to be had with all kinds of good people. You may think it naive to pull the Woodstock card and say all’s hunky dory for the ignorant hippie girl, but I’d say it’s just the opposite.

To be aware of what it feels like when a group of total strangers come together for a common purpose and willingly engage with one another is an invaluable lesson that makes many real life situations more manageable. When something as seemingly small as

not renewing the community farm plan makes it to the hallways, a resolution that was perhaps agreed not to be thought much of, suddenly doesn’t sound as good. Students and faculty alike are rallying around a common purpose happily, to help each other stand up for the community, and hold accountable the source of this disadvantageous decision.

Folks may not always be able to produce the ideal result, but distaste can become definitive quickly, and last for a long time. It’s kind of like being at a festival trying to decide what artist to see next, and remembering how bad that one band was when you saw them live once. You’d be surprised how far “definitely not worth it, they’re awful,” can go. With an affirmative headnod, the whole group agrees and, in the word of the great philosopher Jay Z, “it’s on to the next one.” That’s the power and influence of community, and surely we can agree on that.

We doused this issue in the special sauce, hope you enjoy. Be back in a few weeks - be safe, and have a stellar spring break.

College of DuPage transfer credit is pre-approved through existing agreements between Lewis University and the College of DuPage.

Learn more about our programs on-site: ΄ ή 4^\_dcRa EPWR]PR QRUaRR ΄ ή 4aW\W]MZΧE^PWMZ <dbcWPR M]Q 7WaR ERaeWPR 2Q\W]WbcaMcW^] QRUaRRb ΄ 6]VM]PRQ ή FRMPVRa 6QdPMcW^] QRUaRRb ͈6MaZh 4VWZQV^^Q 6QdPMcW^]͜ 6ZR\R]cMah͜ E_RPWMZ͜ M]Q 4^\OW]RQ 6ZR\R]cMahΧE_RPWMZ 6QdPMcW^]͉

lewisu.edu/transfers (815) 836-5250

Caroline Koch Managing Editor 26 March 2014 // codcourier.org // 3

S TA F F

CAROLINE KOCH MANAGING EDITOR EDITOR@COD.EDU

PARKER RECHSTEINER SCENE EDITOR ARTS@COD.EDU

POLICY

JOASH MENCIAS NEWS EDITOR NEWS@COD.EDU

KELLY WEESE SPORTS EDITOR SPORTS@COD.EDU

JORDIN GIGNAC DESIGN/SOCIAL MEDIA EDITOR

CHRISTINA PAYTON ADVERTISING ADVISOR

GIGNACJ@GMAIL.COM

PAYTONC359@COD.EDU

ROSALIE DEASTIS FEATURES EDITOR FEATURES@COD.EDU

DENTON DOOLEY PHOTO EDITOR PHOTO@COD.EDU

The Courier is published every Wednesday when classes are in session during the fall and spring semester, except for the first and last Wednesday of each semester and the week of and the week after spring Break as a public forum with content chosen by student editors. One copy free, additional copies available upon request.

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WELL

PREPARED. OFFERING TRANSFER PROGRAMS IN: Information Technology and Management

Industrial Technology and Management

• • • • • • •

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Systems Security Web Design and Applications Development IT Entrepreneurship and Management System Administration Software Development Networking and Communications Data Management

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PART-TIME / FULL-TIME

TRANSFER SCHOLARSHIPS AVAILABLE FOR COD STUDENTS

Courses offered in Wheaton, Chicago, and online.

630.682.6000 4 // codcourier.org // 26 March 2014

www.iit.edu/sat

NEWS BOARD MEETING HIGHLIGHTS

Non-discrimination policies set to include gender identity College of DuPage is set to include language in its equal employment and non-discrimination policies, aimed at protecting transgender individuals.

Revised drafts of policies 15-5, 15-10 and 20-5 were presented for first reading at last Thursday’s board of trustees meeting.

If passed, these policies would officially prohibit harassment and discrimination on the basis of “gender identity and expression” at COD. Bradley Setter, president of

COD’s Pride Alliance, told the trustees last Thursday he was “glad and proud” about the inclusion of gender identity in the policies.

Trustee Kim Savage, who has advocated for the issue, credited Setter for bringing it to the attention of the board. Savage also thanked members of the administration for re-writing the policies.

The revisions are expected to come up for a vote in next month’s board meeting.

PHOTO COURTESY OF PROF. DEBORAH ADELMAN/COMMUNITY EDUCATION FARM

Breuder pushes for community college bachelor’s degrees President Robert Breuder spoke from the podium at last Thursday’s board of trustees meeting to discuss the idea of allowing Illinois community colleges to provide baccalaureate degrees.

Breuder is advocating for state legislation that would make four-year degrees a reality at College of DuPage.

“The moment is right now... to follow what 22 other states have already done,” Breuder said in reference to other states

Faculty, supporters fight for farm’s fate

who have approved community colleges to offer baccalaureate degrees.

Breuder said the college would focus on specific “career programming” degrees such as nursing, information technology and manufacturing.

Breuder echoed these comments in September when he told The Courier four-year degrees would launch “community colleges in the stadium of a whole other world.”

JOASH MENCIAS // NEWS EDITOR

Supporters of the Community Education Farm expressed disappointment at last Thursday’s board of trustees meeting after its faculty coordinators were told College of DuPage would discontinue the farm.

The nearly 11-year-old program was set to be relocated from the west side of main campus, however COD decided not

STUDENT LEADERSHIP COUNCIL ELECTION RESULTS Michelle Andrea Gallardo Stephany Ruiz-Gonzalez

to provide a permanent location for the farm earlier this year.

Faculty farm coordinators Deborah Adelman, Shamili Sandiford and Diana Strode all spoke out during the March board meeting.

“My colleagues and I find it difficult to understand why COD has chosen to dismantle the Community Education Farm,” Strode addressed the trustees. “We would like to con-

Omar Escamilla

tinue to work with the college to find a permanent home on campus for the farm.”

Karen Woznicki, a horticulture and genetics student, told the board her involvement with the farm gave her various transferable skills: “I have gained valuable experiences in my intended area of study that will help me when I transfer to my four-year see FARM, page 7

NOTE: True voter turnout for

this student election would not be completely accurate because of the variable number of students throughout the semester. However, if it were to be compared to the tenth day credit headcount for this term of 28,100 students, voter turnout would amount to only 1.6 percent.

Stephanie Torres Spencer DePue

399 VOTES 233 VOTES

195 VOTES 13 WRITE-INS

VICE PRESIDENT

336 VOTES

99 VOTES 10 WRITE-INS

PRESIDENT

28 WRITE-INS

STUDENT TRUSTEE

TOTAL VOTES: 461

*ALL PERCENTAGES ARE ROUNDED. 26 March 2014 // codcourier.org // 5

NEWS OPINION

HAROON ATCHA

POLITICAL COLUMNIST With the annexation of Crimea, Vladimir Putin has called our bluff. Our tough talk has in the end, not amounted to much. Crimea isn’t worth the fight to America, and Western Europe can’t live without Russia’s investments. That being said, the sovereignty of borders must be respected and we shouldn’t be giving any serious consideration to Putin’s argument that Crimea was practically Russian already. This argument is ridiculous. It’s like New Zealand invading Guam because it’s “practically Polynesian anyway.” We need to take action in an intelligent, targeted manner. The possibility of involvement by the United Nations is slim; Russia’s veto power in the Security Council all but guarantees that. Economic globalization has also, in some

> <

ways, hamstrung our ability to react to this crisis. Putin counted on Europe’s dependence on Russian money to make a clean getaway but that doesn’t mean we can’t take advantage of this interdependence as well.

I’d say economic sanctions are the way to go; in short, money talks. The quickest way to make Putin listen is to hit his friends in the wallet. We need to implement targeted sanctions on Putin’s higher ups. China may also prove a strange bedfellow in this effort: they are none too happy with Russia’s actions.

Capitalizing on China’s irritation may help to send a more forceful message. Ultimately the sovereignty of borders must be respected and the severity of our action must mirror the severity of the offense.

POINT POINT

COUNTER

HOW SHOULD THE U.S. RESPOND TO RUSSIA IN CRIMEA?

PARKER RECHSTEINER SCENE EDITOR

We shouldn’t do anything.

Not yet. While Russia’s actions in Crimea can succinctly be summarized as “uncool”, they haven’t done anything yet that warrants a direct intervention from the United States. Even the sanctions levied thus far feel half hearted...it seems that Americans don’t care about Ukraine nearly as much as the loudest voices would suggest we’re just all afraid of Russia still. The Cold War is too fresh in our memories, and the United States has gotten comfy in its position as indisputable world superpower. Russia, with the Olympics and now Crimea, is getting more attention than we’re willing to share. Is it “okay” that Putin annexed part of a sovereign state? No, it isn’t.

But this isn’t a blitzkrieg, this isn’t an irrational actor doing

strange things we can’t understand; in fact, I would argue that in the same position, the United States would behave the same as Russia has. We’re certainly not shy about using our military, or about meddling in the affairs of “our own backyard”. Historically, those two things are as American as apple pie at a baseball game. I don’t think it’s right when we do those things either - my point is simply that if we, as a nation, are going to start condemning other people for taking a page out of our playbook, we should seriously consider rewriting some of it.

OPINION

Jail’s revolving door, why it won’t stop turning BOB MCCAFFREY // NEWS CONTRIBUTOR

L

ock the door and throw away the key. Out of sight, out of mind. As a correctional officer who works inside the Cook County jail, I see firsthand how that pretty much sums up how society deals with crime and punishment. My opinions about incarceration piggyback on political columnist Haroon Atcha’s article in the March 5 edition of The Courier, focused on the high number of people of color behind bars in the U.S., relative to their overall population in society. Here, my focus will be on the number of detainees in jail certified as mentally ill.

First, a startling mental health statistic that changes daily, as listed on the latest front webpage of

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the Cook County Sheriff ’s Office regarding its jail population: “49 percent of arrestees at the March 7 Cook County intake self-identified as mentally ill.”

Imagine that. Half of all detainees in jail not only know they have a mental health issue, but they’re actually willing to admit it to get the help they need. Statistics can get boring very quickly, but if you were asked what facility in Illinois houses the largest number of the mentally ill, the answer is the Cook County Jail.

The reasons have been well publicized, funding cuts that have led to state mental health treatment facilities being shuttered. Patients then often have to either move in with family or friends, or the

majority of the time, fend for themselves, which means they end up homeless on the streets committing more crimes – but the numbers show many of which are non-violent offenses.

Russian philosopher Fyodor Dostoevsky once said that the degree of civilization in a society can be measured by entering its jails.

Once behind bars, the mentally ill are targets of abuse to fellow detainees who prey among the weak.

There’s only so much us officers can do to protect the vulnerable from being taken advantage of by bullies, since we can only be in so many places at one time.

Please remember, I’m not talking about violent offenders here, but the detainees who

commit non-violent offenses and simply don’t know any better; desperately need mental health treatment including medication.

The mentally ill who break the law can still be securely detained, but health professionals I work with at the jail will certainly tell you the sick belong in a setting more inducive to providing health care and rehabilitation in order to possibly re-enter our communities as productive and safe members of society.

What goes around, comes around. So how do we stop this unending cycle of arrest, release, and re-arrest, over and over again? I’m not a public policy expert, but we need to stop and think twice when a politician says

they will cut spending on social programs that help the most vulnerable among us. Stop and think next time when a company raking in huge profits threatens to leave the state when demanding a tax break. Stop and think when we hear the explanations about the root causes of crime, and how an ineffective criminal justice system ultimately affects all of us – be it directly or indirectly.

Again, whatever goes around, comes around. Am I my brother’s keeper? If you think not, then there will continue to be the same detainees cycling through our broken criminal justice system, both the mentally ill, and you the victims of their crimes.

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school.”

The administration cited the lack of campus space and an academic program that would require the farm as primary reasons of the shut down. “In short, while the general idea of a community farm or garden is a good concept, we don’t believe it is justified since it is not required by any program in the Academic Affairs division,” wrote Joe Moore, vice president of marketing and communications.

According to Adelman, the faculty farm co-coordinators were notified of the farm’s fate when they met with college officials in February. Adelman claims the administration guaranteed a space for the farm after relocation based on an agreement with the president’s office. “I would like to know why the administration is not honoring their promise... there is no rational explanation,” Adelman said. She also notes the issue has now been brought up to the COD Faculty Association (CODFA), who has requested administrative representatives to meet with faculty committees regarding outdoor laboratory spaces.

On their Facebook page, it was apparent CODFA sided with the faculty coordinators and expressed dissatisfaction over the administration’s handling over the matter.

A Facebook page administrator for the CODFA suggested action when they commented on a post from Saturday, making a remark in reference to the college’s expansion of the Homeland Security Education Center: “Write to a Trusttee (sic), they want to know what their constituents think. It’s a cliché, they hear them from the administrators all the time, and so tell them you prefer ‘crops instead of guns’.”

Adelman hopes for an eventual resolution in their favor. “We would like a positive answer that COD find one quarter of an acre for the farm...I can only trust that [college officials and trustees] will act as educational leaders in providing a site.”

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FEATURES

PRIDE ALLIANCE GETS THEIR GATSBY ON ROSALIE DEASTIS // FEATURES EDITOR

COD’s Pride Alliance promotes awareness, and educates on lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning and straight issues with regard to diversity of sexual orientation. They have held dances for the LGBTQ community in the past and are holding their second annual drag show April 11. This year, the theme is 1920s with a more modern twist. Songs from movies and musicals like “Chicago,” “Burlesque” and “The Great Gatsby” will be used in performances. Members are excited to add theatre to a typical drag show.

“Performers have been working over the past two months to get this show together and even a murder mystery script for the audience to follow,” said Pride Alliance president, Brad Setter.

A drag queen is a man who dresses up, and often acts, with exaggerated femininity. Personal reasons for doing drag will

8 // codcourier.org // 26 March 2014

be different for each drag queen one may encounter. The most common purposes are self-expression, performing and entertaining, a creative outlet, means of self-exploration and/or a way to make cultural statements.

Drag kings are mostly female performance artists who dress in masculine drag and personify male gender stereotypes. A typical show may incorporate dancing and singing, sometimes live or lip-synching to pre-recorded tracks. Drag kings often perform as exaggeratedly macho male characters.

Pride Alliance would like to remind the COD community that this a show for everyone, and all are welcome.

EVENT in the SRC DRAG SHOW: THE FABULOUS 20s College Of Dupage Pride Alliance Presents The 2nd Annual Drag Show: The Fabulous 20’s on April 11 in SRC 2000. Event tickets are $10 for the show starting at 6 p.m. For more information, log onto facebook and search for the event, “2nd Annual Drag Show @ College of DuPage.”

6 pm - 9 pm APRIL 11

F E AT U R E S O P I N I O N

Community farm food for thought PARKER RECHSTEINER // SCENE EDITOR

Just weeks after rebranding the college, “the new school of thought,” the administration has decided to eliminate the Community Education Farm. Those two ideas - the rebranding and the farm - seem separate, but when examined together reveal something troubling about the school we attend.

The loss of the farm is a bummer in its own right- the fact that we had a place where students went and grew things, learned about sustainability on a personal level and gave something back to the community, is beautiful. There is a lot of focus on streamlined education here. Getting through your program, while staying focused on the classes you need, seems to be the ultimate goal, but here is value to being well rounded. To working with your hands to create something for someone else’s benefit. To understanding the connection we have with our planet, and by extension our planetary roommates - each

other. The farm taught people all those things, in a dirty, substantive way.

The “new school of thought,” it’s clear, isn’t about substance. As countless students and faculty observed at the rollout, the whole thing is just marketing, which isn’t a bad thing in it’s own right. The issue is that the decisions the administration is making are not consistent with the branding they have chosen for themselves. It is, in effect, false advertising.

The changes made so far are not progressive. They don’t teach us how to creatively think about the world in new ways. Maybe we can learn a lesson in how to make education profitable. Or how to make a campus look pretty. Or how to fit as many students into a given area as possible; these seem to be the priorities in the “new school”. But the things that really matter don’t look good on a spreadsheet. They might not bring in a thousand more students, justify a $5 per credit hour

tuition bump, or lend themselves nicely to advertising photos. They simply enrich our lives in a much deeper way than traditional education methods.

Joe Moore, spokesperson for the college, compared the farm to a planetarium; saying that while it enhances certain programs, it isn’t essential, so the administration is free to decide whether or not to keep it. Of course it’s optional. Presidential office suites are also optional. Fountains are optional. Underground shooting ranges are optional. The question isn’t whether or not the school has the option to get rid of the farm. The problem is that, for a place so willing to make itself out to be a mecca of progressive learning, the decisions that are made are a bit less “future of education” and a bit more “marketable McCollege.”

Balancing high school and college friendships

“ “ Since it is not required, and is therefore optional, we are free to determine whether or not to replace it.

- from COD’s official statement regarding the Community Education Farm

ROSALIE DEASTIS // FEATURES EDITOR

In high school, most of us attached to a particular crowd or group, and essentially found our “place.” Mine was with the “popular” kids who partied every weekend, ditched school and parked our shiny cars in the staff parking spots. Thankfully we all jumped off our high horses in college and learned drunk photos on Facebook don’t define how cool we are; much less earn us a degree.

Now we’ve all connected with new people who might have similar majors to ours, live in the same dorm building, or are in the same club as us. A lot of us might have realized it’s a challenge balancing our college friends with our old high school ones. As much as we want to build our futures and continue meeting new people, our past is still an important part of our

lives that helped shape who we’ve become.

So how do we maintain both? Is it a matter of time management or attempting to combine the groups? Firstly, you have to actually want to keep the relationship or relationships strong. It’s understandable that some friendships are no longer worth the trouble; part of growing up is realizing some people are on a different path than you, which makes some friendships difficult to hold up.

If you want to stay close with old friends, you’ll find a way. Lucky for our generation, social media comes in handy for situations like this. I don’t always have time to sit down and call all of my old friends, so it’s nice that we can stay updated with tweets and Instagram photos.

However, social media isn’t enough to

keep a lifelong friendship strong. When your old friends come home from their respective colleges, put in the effort to schedule a coffee date or grab lunch to catch up. Once we’ve all gotten comfortable in our new circles of friends, it feels easier to stay in that bubble, but our old friends that we love deserve our attention as well.

Sometimes balancing old and new friendships can involve some compromising. If an old friend is having a birthday party, she most likely expects you to stay out of plans your new circle might be forming for that weekend. Keeping a balance means having to miss out on parties or events once in a while, but at the same time, you can’t please everyone.

The important thing is to not choose one

group over the other every time.

Whatever the situation, we have to accept the fact that it’s normal for people to grow apart. It’s likely we’ll end up staying close with a small handful or even just a couple of our old friends in the future. As our academic careers grow, we’re learning that certain things are more important than having plans on a Friday night; that’s something I’ve come to understand. In high school, all I cared about was having a huge circle of people to hang out with.

Now my focus is mostly on my grades, where I’m transferring, my jobs and where I see myself in the next few years. I know that friendships are going to come and go along the way.

26 March 2014 // codcourier.org // 9

F E AT U R E S E V E N T S

CAMPUS EVENTS DuPage Co. Job Fair

CODCON XIX

Coping with Loss

When: Wednesday, April 2, 2014 10:00 AM - 3:00 PM Where: Student Resource Center -- Room 2000

When: Wednesday, April 2, 2014 2:00 PM - 3:30 PM Where: Student Resource Center, Room 1144 (north cafeteria)

When: Friday, April 4 through Sunday, April 6.

Where: Student Resource Center, Room 2000

College of DuPage and State Representative Sandy Pihos will host the DuPage County Job Fair. For more information, or if you are an employer and would like to participate, call (630) 858-8855.

The loss of a loved one can be stressful, affecting everything you do. Learn how to grieve in a healthy way and what to expect on your grief journey.

Hosted by Counseling and Advising.

The Sci-fi/Fantasy Club at COD will host CODCON XIX, “The Con is Not a Lie.” To register visit www.codcon.com

Event information courtesy of www.cod.edu.

“Everything was easy to do. I transferred right in, no problem.”

LIAM GROGAN, HISTORY MAJOR AT LOYOLA

For Liam Grogan, transferring to Loyola from the College of DuPage was a breeze. From reviewing his transcripts to helping him line up financial aid, Loyola’s advisors helped Liam every step of the way.

And that let Liam focus on what matters most—getting his degree from one of the nation’s best universities.

Meet with us at the College of DuPage Table Visits: Feb. 20, Mar. 11, & Apr. 10, 10 AM–1 PM Learn more about transferring to Loyola at LUC.edu/transfer.

SEE WHAT ELSE LIAM HAS TO SAY ABOUT LOYOLA.

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FOCUS

ROAD TRIP to

FESTIVAL CITY, USA There are few things cooler than the instant conversation starter and friend maker that is the festival wristband, and by the end of summer, your stacked arm party serves as the ultimate trophy. Whether you’re a weekend warrior or a rookie, let this map serve as encouragement for you to buy the ticket, and take the ride.

CAROLINE KOCH // MANAGING EDITOR

HARD SUMMER AUGUST 2-3 WHITTIER NARROWS RECREATION AREA LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA 2013 ATTENDANCE: 70,000 WEEKEND PASS: $162 (PAYMENT PLAN AVAILABLE!) Probability of selling out: Always! This is one of the most authentic music events LA has to offer. HARD creator and producer Gary Richards is an original club kid himself, and knows just what Sally concert-goer wants in terms of the LA dance scene experience.

There really ain’t no party like a Cali party, and this one’s got soul.

Camping? Nay. Highlights: Lineup historically drops the last week of April, but last year the bill was stacked with Knife Party, Justice, Duck Sauce, Dog Blood and Bassnectar.

SASQUATCH! MAY 23-25 GORGE AMPHITHEATER - GEORGE, WA // 2013 ATTENDANCE: 60,000+ 3 DAY PASS: $350 // SINGLE DAY PASS: NOT AVAILABLE Probability of selling out: Likely; Ticketmaster is already reporting “not many left.” Camping? YAY! Highlights: Outkast, MIA, The National, Queens of the Stone Age, Major Lazer, Violent Femmes, Tyler the Creator, Portugal the Man, Boys Noize, Washed Out. What’s up: The most gorgeous place to see a show. Put this venue on your bucket list, above Red Rocks in Colorado.

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COACHELLA APRIL 11-13 + 18-20 INDIO POLO GROUNDS INDIO, CALIFORNIA 2013 ATTENDANCE: 99,000/DAY 3 DAY PASS: SOLD OUT Camping? YAY! Highlights: Outkast, Arcade Fire, Lorde, Pharrell, Ellie Goulding, Muse, Foster the People, Kid Cudi, MGMT, Beck, Calvin Harris, Lana Del Ray, Alesso. What’s up: Celebrities abound! This party on the polo ground is more about being there than anything, but let it be known: producers Goldenvoice do it right year after year, making Coachella the most sought after festival ticket in the nation - so much so that the festival runs for two identical weekends - selling out both in under a week. There’s a visibly older crowd here, but that might just be because the EDM crew doesn’t leave the Sahara Tent.

SNOWBALL

ELECTRIC FOREST

BONNAROO

APRIL 4-6 SPORTS AUTHORITY FIELD - DENVER, CO 2013 ATTENDANCE: 10,000 3 DAY PASS: $169 SINGLE DAY PASS: $70

JUNE 26-29 DOUBLE JJ RANCH - ROTHBURY, MI 2013 ATTENDANCE: 30,000 WEEKEND PASS: $290 SINGLE DAY PASS: NOT AVAILABLE

Probability of selling out: Good; past two years weekend passes have sold out, however, this year the venue is bigger than ever at the home of the Broncos. Camping?

Nay. Highlights: Busta Rhymes, Knife Party, Griz, PLM Party featuring Pretty Lights, Michal Menert, Paul Basic, Eliot Lipp and more friends, Yeasayer, Earl Sweatshirt.

What’s up: A little chill in the air never stopped the Mile High City from a good time.

You can count on Derek Vincent Smith (Pretty Lights) to bring it in his home state, and bring the whole Pretty Lights Music label on stage with him too! With a crowd full of bobbing heads in mountain gear, SnowBall is quintessentially Colorado, in all its steezy glory.

Probability of selling out: Low, surprisingly.

Camping? YAY! Highlights: Lauryn Hill, The String Cheese Incident, Zedd, STS9, Booka Shade, Stephen Marley, Cut Copy, Steve Angello, Flying Lotus, Matt and Kim What’s up: It’s progressive, it’s electronic, it’s jam bands, it’s the “bestival;” and every year Sherwood Forest gets more cosmic. Pro tip: Buy a hammock from a vendor. Next to your Camelbak, it’s going to be the most important part of your festival gear, easily.

JUNE 12-15 GREAT STAGE PARK MANCHESTER, TN 2013 ATTENDANCE: 90,000 WEEKEND PASS: $314 (PAYMENT PLAN AVAILABLE) SINGLE DAY PASS: NOT AVAILABLE

HANGOUT FESTIVAL

PITCHFORK

MAY 16-18 GULF SHORES, ALABAMA 2013 ATTENDANCE: 35,000 (CAPPED) WEEKEND PASS: $260 SINGLE DAY PASS: NOT AVAILABLE THIS YEAR

JULY 18-20 UNION PARK, CHICAGO 2013 ATTENDANCE: 70,000 WEEKEND PASS: $160 SINGLE DAY PASS: $60 Probability of selling out: High. Usually you can find a single day pass floating around the time of the event, but Union Park is small, and just like North Coast the past few years, this progressive indie fest reliably sells out of 3 days. Camping? Nay. Highlights: Beck, Kendrick Lamar, Neutral Milk Hotel, Giorgio Moroder, Danny Brown, St. Vincent, Grimes, Schoolboy QWhat’s up: Pitchfork has a crowd more chill than the more dancey events. Excpect lots of head bopin’ and PBR drinking.

Probability of selling out: Going to happen - has for the event’s entire existence.

Camping? Nay. Highlights: Black Keys, The Killers, The Avett Brothers, Queens of the Stone Age, Jack Johnson, Gary Clark Jr., Pretty Lights, Capital Cities, Bloody Beetroots, Chance the Rapper. What’s up: Alabama might seem like an odd venue for a beach music festival but I’ve got to give credit where it’s due. Hangout’s energy is free and easy - not an ounce of pretension to be seen or heard - and a great one to go to for a first-time festie.

LOLLAPOLOOZA

JUNE 13-15 SOLDIER FIELD, CHICAGO 2013 ATTENDANCE: 90,000 WEEKEND PASS: $225 SINGLE DAY PASS: RELEASED CLOSER TO THE EVENT, AROUND $75 Probability of selling out: Moderate. Soldier Field is a big place, and while last year’s VIP ticket did end up selling out close to the June date, both single day and general admission passes were still available. Since its 2012 debut, attendance has increased by about 20,000 each year, and is bound to stay on that track with this stellar lineup. Camping? Nay. Highlights: Tiesto, Pretty Lights, Kaskade, Eric Prydz, Knife Party, Big Gigantic, Diplo, Benny Benassi, Pete Tong, Chuckie, Feed Me, Tommy Trash, Dillon Francis What’s up: Party on the 50 yard line with a lineup rivaling that of EDC. This is the Midwest’s Massive and with the help of Tiesto, Pretty Lights and Chi town’s favorite, Kaskade, this year’s three-day event is going to be one we’re talking about all season long.

Probability of selling out: No fail. Tickets went on sale yesterday morning, I wouldn’t be surprised if at the time of you reading this, they’re already scraping to find a single day.Camping?

Nay. Highlights: Lineup usually released in the first week of April, though the rumors are already pouring in thanks to a Chicago Tribune “inside source,” citing the names of a handful of Lolla alumni like Eminem, Kings of Leon and Skrillex. (Hint: Skrillex has not named a Chicago stop on this year’s Mothership tour, ergo, that stop is likely to be Grant Park.) What’s up: Basically you’ve got 150 artists spanning eight stages over three days in your backyard. Lolla spans genres, ages and personal style, plus a massive sampling of the best eats in town. Be sure to bring your comfiest boogie shoes though - the distance between the two main stages is just south of a mile - it will take about 20 minutes to transverse!

SUMMER CAMP MAY 22-25 THREE SISTERS PARK - CHILLICOTHE, IL // 2013 ATTENDANCE: 15,000 // WEEKEND PASS: $213 (PAYMENT PLAN AVAILABLE) // SINGLE DAY PASS: SUNDAY ONE DAY PASSES AVAILABLE A MONTH BEFORE THE EVENT Probability of selling out: Low. Camping? YAY! Highlights: moe., Umphrey’s McGee, Bassnectar, Trey Anastasio Band, Primus, Lotus, Wolfgang Gartner, EOTO, Gramatik, Koan Sound, Zac Brown Band. Pro tip: pack light, you don’t park with your car so be ready to truck your load to the campgrounds, and bring a liner for underneath your tent. Last summer the grounds were more like a pool with the storms that blew in. Oh and if you find a path lined by glowsticks in the middle of nowhere leading into the forest, follow it.

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EDC JUNE 20-22 MOTOR SPEEDWAY LAS VEGAS, NV 2013 ATTENDANCE: 345,000 TICKETS SOLD 3 DAY PASS: SOLD OUT SINGLE DAY PASS: NOT AVAILABLE

AUGUST 1-3 GRANT PARK, CHICAGO 2013 ATTENDANCE 300,000 WEEKEND PASS: $250 + FEES SINGLE DAY PASS: $100 + FEES

SPRING AWAKENING

Probability of selling out: Inevitable.

Camping? YAY! Highlights: Elton John, Skrillex and friends superjam!!!, Kanye West, Vampire Weekend, Jack White, The Flaming Lips, Phoenix, Disclosure, Frank Ocean, Wiz Kalifa What’s up: There are few things cooler than seeing Elton John, Skrillex and Wiz Kalifa in the same night - possibly all on stage at one time.

Of all the lineups this season, there’s no doubt Bonnaroo boasts a totally unique must-see (and very, very HOT) experience in Tennessee.

ULTRA WAVEFRONT DATE NOT OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED, BUT CONFIRMED FOR 2014;

MOST LIKELY JULY 4-6 MONTROSE BEACH, CHICAGO 2013 ATTENDANCE: 72,000 WEEKEND PASS: UP TO $215 DAY-OF; WATCH GROUPON FOR THE $75 STEAL SINGLE DAY PASS: AROUND $75 Probability of selling out: Camping? Nay Highlights: Wavefront has an affinity for true legends of house music. Past headliners include Fatboy Slim, Boys Noize, Duck Sauce, Eric Prydz, Erick Morillo, Cosmic Gate and Justice. What’s up: Fun, sun, beach and beats. The epitome of “sun’s out, guns out,” Wavefront is the most straightforward of summer events in the city. Expect a seasoned crowd of concert-goers and big spenders lining the perimeter of the party in white cabanas remiss of Miami’s Collins Ave.

MARCH 28-30 BAYFRONT PARK - MIAMI, FL 2013 ATTENDANCE: 330,000 3 DAY PASS: $505 SINGLE DAY PASS: NOT AVAILABLE Probability of selling out: The website reports 96 percent of tickets sold as of yesterday, it will definitely be 100 before the gates open. Camping? Nay. Highlights: Tiesto, Avicii, Above and Beyond, Basement Jaxx, Armin van Buuren, Afrojack, David Guetta, Hardwell, Carl Cox, CirezD. What’s up: Ultra is a global phenom, boasting audience members from over 95 countries and satellite festivals on four other continents. It’s gotten over saturated in the past two years, but Ultra is the premiere dance music festival; fans of electronic music have to get to Miami at least once to understand the epic level of the event’s production.

Can’t go this year? Stream performances live on Ultra’s YouTube channel, UMFTV.

Probability of selling out: Done and done.

Camping? Nay. Highlights: Every DJ/ producer in the scene that is relevant, literally. What’s up: Electric Daisy Carnival is an dusk to dawn experience of total excess, that could only be possible in Sin City. Event producer Insomniac brought in about $278 million to the Clark County economy in 2013, and is committed to out-doing themselves every year - 2014 will be no different. Pro-tip: The shuttle system to the Speedway is far from an exact science. Get to your departure point as early as you can, because the traffic heading to the venue for the 5 p.m. start is beyond intense.

NOT HAPPENING THIS YEAR: EDC Chicago, All Good in Ohio and Camp Bisco in New York These events are taking a hiatus, though organizers for each have said they’re hopeful for a return in 2015.

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Hippie Chic YOU MIGHT SEE HER AT COACHELLA

FIND HER DANCING AT EDC

Flower Power

FESTIE FASHION ROSALIE DEASTIS // FEATURES EDITOR

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PHOTOS BY DENTON DOOLEY // MODEL JESSICA OBRECKI

The Newbie FIND HER ANYWHERE THIS SEASON!

READY FOR LOLLAPOLOOZA

Breezy Pastels

Color Crazy CATCH HER AT SPRING AWAKENING

SHE’S HEADED TO ELECTRIC FOREST

Fuzzy and Fresh

Festival fashion has become today’s hot, new summer style.

Festival-goers dress from head to toe in fun, head-turning outfits.

Hippie, neon, fringe, crochet, denim and bright colors – these ensembles are bursting with energy and spirit. Music festival fashion has given us a way to express our restless imaginations and creative minds. With each show comes a trend to go along with it, here’s a breakdown of the basics to get you festival-ready.

For EDC and Spring Awakening, we keep it cool with an effortless jean-shorts-and-bandeau combo, along with fun hair pieces; you’re going to be hot from all that dancing so keep it simple!

At Lollapalooza, stay fresh and breezy with a pastel maxi paired with a crop top and light denim jacket. Electric Forest calls for a playful spirit hood, fun skirt and funky shades. And for Coachella, you can’t go wrong with a laid back hippie look.

Whatever festivals you’re headed to this summer, don’t be afraid to unleash your inner gypsy, wizard or spirit animal. Stores from H&M to Urban Outfitters to ForeverXXI offer the fashion fundamentals for festival hopping at affordable prices. Connect with your creative side by mixing and matching different trends and adding personal touches like flowers, gems, feathers and beads.

The season is literally just around the corner and we couldn’t be more ready to stow away the chunky sweaters and bust out the summer festival necessities.

SCENE

Spring break in the burbs PARKER RECHSTEINER // SCENE EDITOR

The car’s all packed, the cooler’s full and your friend made what he promises to be “the best road trip playlist ever, seriously dude.”

It’s spring break, and you’re road tripping down to PCB or PBR or whatever acronym the kids are flocking to these days. That is, unless, you don’t live in a low budget spin-off of “American Pie.” The reality is that many people are paying their own way through college, balancing several jobs along with the slow grind toward a degree. Spring break, for many, isn’t, “where am I going for vacation,” it’s, “how many more hours can I pick up since I don’t have class?” Spending money on a vacation is totally out of the question.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have fun, though. Part of the beauty of Chicagoland is there’s always something going on somewhere.

The suburbs can be sleepy, but there are plenty of cool bars and theaters with stuff going on, any given night. With the weather starting to improve a bit, outdoor activities are more and more accessible, and - as always - the city is only a train ride away. Whether you like art or theater, comedy, music or poetry, there is plenty to do to help you enjoy your spring break in Illinois.

ART The quality of the art museums in Chicago are absolutely fantastic. The Museum of Contemporary Art, and the Art Institute of Chicago are great places to spend an afternoon. It also puts you right in the middle of Museum Campus along south Lake Shore Drive, so you can walk over to the Shedd Aquarium, the Adler Planetarium, or the Field Museum, all of which have free days (check the websites!).

MUSIC There are always concerts happening all over the city, and even if a big name isn’t coming through you can always find some good vibes somewhere. In the suburbs, Evenflow in downtown Geneva has great live music all the time. It’s a cool bar, with a city feel that will make you forget you’re out west. In the city proper, the Gallery Cabaret on Oakley has excellent open mics, with some really impressive artists performing. If you do want the bigger name experience, Shpongle is at Concord Music Hall on March 28, Bastille is playing the Riviera on March 30, and Taking Back Sunday is playing at Concord Music Hall on April 5.

POETRY

OUTSIDE

April is national poetry month, and if you’re into poetry, there’s no beating The Green Mill on Broadway in Uptown, Chicago. The birthplace of slam poetry hosts the Uptown Poetry Slam every Sunday night, during which you will see some phenomenally talented people share their work. On other nights, you can find great jazz at the Mill as well. The Gallery Cabaret also features poetry at its open mics, and writers are always giving readings around the city. On April 5, the Iraqi Mutual Aid Society Poetry Festival is at the Poetry Foundation in the city, if you want to get worldly with it.

The weather is fast improving, so doing things outside might be an option. For a day trip, Starved Rock is a great option. It’s about an hour and a half away, but you can easily spend a whole day hiking and exploring in the state park. If you have a night off, there are several campsites right at the park for an overnight stay. It can serve as a mini-vacation, getting you away from home for a little bit and out in the world. If that isn’t your scene, there’s a 5k Spring Gallop on March 29 in Aurora, which can help you knock the dust off your running shoes after these past few months of being cooped up.

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SCENE

MUSIC

Chicago Jazz Philharmonic pays tribute to NOLA at the MAC PARKER RECHSTEINER // SCENE EDITOR

T

he Chicago Jazz Philharmonic played the MAC on Saturday, taking over the Belushi Performance Hall with “Mardi Gras Carnival: A Salute to New Orleans.” Orbert Davis directed the show, which according to him was, “a celebration of the culture and the freedom of musical interpretation that happened [in New Orleans].”

The performance started of with “Potato Head Blues” by Louis Armstrong, before exploring a series of pieces that all contribute to the musical identity of the The Big Easy. Included is an original by Davis called “The Survival of the Saints,” paying homage to survivors of Hurricane Katrina.

“This will be our second time performing it,” Davis told the Chicago Sun Times. “I wanted this piece to reflect a movie. The scene is before Katrina hit, during the hurricane and then after the hurricane. I used certain elements that draw the emotion and the chaos of

living through the storm. And immediately after the storm, there’s about 30 seconds of very uncomfortable silence.

That represents after the storm hit. Not only was New Orleans stunned, but the whole country was stunned as we looked and saw the images, and they waited and waited for help to arrive. New Orleans was crippled in a sense and there was literally no movement going on.”

Davis, who also played trumpet throughout the performance, is co-founder and artistic director of the philharmonic. He also co-founded Jazz Alive, a program that teaches skills through music to Chicago Public School students.

Davis was joined on stage by Grammy-winning musician Howard Levy, as well Reginald Robinson, recipient of the John D. & Catherine T. MacArthur Award, also known as the ‘genius grant.’

• • • • • • •

The unusual suspects; weird instruments that rock PARKER RECHSTEINER // SCENE EDITOR

2013 was the year of the banjo. Led by bands like Mumford and Sons, the modern folk-rock scene has fully matured, and with it, a slew of instruments new to mainstream ears.

Gone are the simple days of guitar, drums, bass, and microphone - sometimes a keyboard, but even that was a bonus. Now, every band has at least a dozen bearded dudes on stage, playing everything from banjo to didjeridoo to triangle (if the lead singer has a less-talented younger brother). Moog synthesizers, guitars with 24 strings, guitars with harps in them, sentient guitars that transform into General Motors vehicles- maybe not that last one, but the reality is that weird instruments are taking over our music. If you aren’t a musician, sometimes it’s tough to figure out exactly what the guys are playing on stage or if the sounds are even coming from instruments at all.

As festival season gets closer, here’s a guide to identify some of the odder instruments on stage.

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UKULELE

MANDOLIN

Alright, so the ukulele isn’t THAT weird. It’s more of a gateway drug to weirder instruments. They are simple, cheap and easy to learn, plus they sound like the beach. Ukes come from Hawaii, and owe their modern resurgence to Israel Kamakawiwo’ole, that 600 pound guy who sang “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” Jason Mraz’s “I’m Yours” and Ingrid Michaelson’s “You and I” are also songs played to death by budding ukulelists.

The mandolin is a staple of American bluegrass music, and with the exploding popularity of modern bluegrass, this little guy is showing his head in more and more places. Boasting eight strings in pairs of two, the mandolin offers an interesting, fuller sound.

It has its roots in Italy, a descendant of the lute, a stringed instrument popular in the renaissance. Boyd Tinsley of Dave Matthews Band uses the mandolin a lot, as does Marcus Mumford. You’ll be sure to see these on stage at any festival.

This is the pinnacle of modern musical achievement. Every band of the future will have at least 3 dedicated players, who will drop fat kazoo beats over a mellow dulcimer groove. Write it down: 2014 will be remembered as the year the electric kazoo finally got some love.

ELECTRIC KAZOO

DULCIMER

TALK BOX

The Appalachian dulcimer is a truly American instrument, created in the 19th century by immigrants settling in the mountains. It is related to the zither, which means something to people who know what a zither is...but no one knows what a zither is. The dulcimer has three to five strings, tuned to only two notes, making it incredibly simple to learn and play. This hasn’t shown up as much lately, but it was played by Cyndi Lauper and Brian Jones (The Rolling Stones), so the precedent is there. With the growing addiction to folk music in the mainstream, expect to see some crunchy dulcimer jams in the next few years.

Ever seen a guitarist walk up to the mic and stick a fat straw in his mouth before playing some especially funky riffs? Before auto-tune, there was the talk box. Talk boxes allow a musician to shape the sound of the guitar, as if it were speaking through their lips. This causes a cool effect where the instrument sounds like it’s actually talking. This was made famous by Peter Frampton way back in the day, but is showing a resurgence in the live music scene, aided by the ubiquity of auto-tune and vocoder effects in pop music.

Ramen noodles

SCENE

FOOD

You think you know, but you have no idea CAROLINE KOCH // MANAGING EDITOR

The touchstone of the college student.

It always feels incredibly satisfying to be so full from a 39 cent meal. Microwaveable ramen is the largest of any average college student’s necessary food groups, but that little package of dry noodles is a far cry from the real thing. You might not think it, but the traditional Japanese dish is delicately layered with flavor and takes a great deal of effort to make. I had the best bowl of ramen I’ve ever experienced in Vietnam, which is weird I know. But remembering that meal while waiting three minutes to hear the buzzer for my mug of a “chicken flavored” impersonator after school the other day, I set out on a mission to recreate the real deal.

Cooking delicious ramen in true Japanese fashion is so outfitted with steps, it takes about three days to complete. I made a dashi, a freakin’ dashi!

That is some Top Chef worthy, culinary wizardry.

It’s a stock made from fish and kelp, used as the base of your favorite miso soup appetizer. The dashi had to be shelved for at least a day, as did my enthusiasm, which I needed good and rested for day two.

Peeling ginger, sautéing bok choy, learning how to actually get the good stuff out of lemongrass; frying an entire pork shoulder, only to make and strain another broth… this ramen is serious.

The end result though is the most delectably fragrant and outrageously tasty entity I have ever produced by following directions. Over 60 hours and $80 later, I had enough soup to last my house two weeks, which was 100 percent worth it, but it definitely makes me appreciate that convenient “college student staple” a little bit more.

Below is a not-as-complex variation, give it a go; you’ll have lunch for a month!

THE (ALMOST) REAL RAMEN RECIPE 8 small dried shiitake mushrooms 4 ½ cups water 4 teaspoons toasted sesame oil 6 – 8 ounces cremini mushrooms 6 cloves garlic, finely chopped 1 tsp – 1 tb crushed red chili flakes 1 ½ tablespoons shiro miso (white miso paste) 1 ½ tablespoons aka miso (red miso paste) 10 ounces dried ramen noodles (boiled for about 3 minutes) Fresh cilantro leaves, for garnish

Make the mushroom stock: place dried shiitake mushrooms in a pot with the water (salted if you like). Bring the water almost to a boil and then turn down the heat to maintain a simmer.. Cook for 5 minutes.

Remove the pot from the heat and let the stock stand for 3 minutes. Strain the stock through a finemesh strainer and set the stock aside.

Make the soup: heat 3 teaspoons of the toasted sesame oil in a large skillet or wok over high heat.

Add the sliced cremini mushrooms and cook for about 20 seconds. Drizzle in the remaining teaspoon of toasted sesame oil, then add the finely chopped

garlic and crushed red chili flakes, and stir-fry for another 20 seconds. Pour the mushroom stock through a fine-mesh strainer held directly over the pan. (Discard the solids left in the strainer.) Adjust the heat to maintain a steady simmer, and separate the cooked noodles into 3 or 4 bowls. Place the shiro miso and aka miso in a small bowl and ladle some of the hot stock from the pan into the bowl. Whisk the miso pastes and broth together until smooth, then add to the simmering stock in the pan.

Turn off the heat, then ladle the broth over the noodles in each bowl. Garnish with fresh cilantro leaves and serve piping hot... you’ve done it!

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SCENE

REVIEW

LISTEN: Recess CAROLINE KOCH // MANAGING EDITOR

E

DM’s reigning champion, Sonny Moore returns to the scene in a big way with the release of “Recess,” just in time for festival season. The growth on the first ever, full-length Skrillex album is palpable, pertaining to both the evolution of the Los Angeles native’s musical style, as well as the progressive nature of the track listing itself. From first to last track (HA!), “Recess” is a testament to the three years spent producing it, and each song reflects a different moment in Moore’s slingshot to the top of the electronic mountain.

The LP starts true to the Skrillex signature in the explosive “Alls Fair in Love and Dubstep,” appropriately exclaiming, ‘Guess who’s back ************!?’ From there, this rocket is headed to Planet Get Up and

SKRILLEX BIG BEAT

Dance. The title track is cleverly constructed with help from Kill the Noise and Michael Angelakov (Passion Pit), plus a vocal from old-school hype man Fatman Scoop, whose skills you will recognize. In fact, all but two songs are collabs, one of which will have some fans undoubtedly confused.

“Doompy Poomp” is experimental but deliberate - it’s ballsy, especially for an album of this magnitude - which is why I love it so. It’s the convergence of some of my favorite Skrillex flavors. If you were wondering if “Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites” should actually be considered music, this one might have you scratching your head again, but it’s a huge step forward in creativity, and my spirit hood is off to him.

Chicago’s own Chance the Rapper gets a feature in the lusty “Coast is Clear,” and in addition to Moore’s love of hip hop, the

album is seasoned with reggae vibes - a staple of Skrillex swagger. “Ragga Bomb” and “Stranger” are major highlights we’ll be hearing a lot of this summer.

“Recess” not only feels like a complete live show, it’s the soundtrack to your Friday night. Played straight through this album is a total montage of you and your best friends deciding to go play laser tag, followed by a spontaneous crazy night in the city, and even extends all the way to you crashing into bed, exhausted from all the fun.

If you’re worried that Skrillex has gone all progressive and different on you, not to worry, “Recess” is just another trip on Moore’s magic spaceship; an intergalactic good time that I shall warmly welcome the reinvention of, again and again.

WATCH: Muppets Most Wanted JAMES DRISCOLL // ARTS COLUMNIST

T

he Muppets sing about how sequels are hard to pull off and the story just isn’t usually as good as the first in a funny opening tune aptly named, “We’re Doing a Sequel.” Sadly, however, the song ultimately foreshadows what is right and wrong with the film.

The story begins with a tour manager named Dominic Bad Guy, played by Ricky Gervais. Dominic promises the Muppet crew grand tours and great wealth. What they don’t know is Dominic is in cahoots with an evil frog (a Kermit lookalike), named Constantine who has escaped from a prison in Siberia. The duo plans to use the Muppets as decoys as they travel Europe and steal valuable jewels from museums.

The evil Kermit also infiltrates the gang by disguising himself as the real Kermit, in order to send everyone’s favorite frog off to jail.

To say the plot is hokey would be putting it nicely. Characters do exactly what you’d

DISNEY

expect and the story follows a route that can be predicted within the first ten minutes.

Not that there’s anything wrong with an obvious story; it is a family Muppets movie after all. However, the jokes are not quite as good as the previous film, which makes the paper-thin plot less enjoyable to watch.

It’s not that the movie is without humor though. The overarching comedy consists of references to other films; sometimes they work. There is a scene where Kermit tries digging through the wall behind a poster (a la “Shawshank Redemption”) only to be told by a guard that “Everyone tries that one.” Other times, the mocks completely fail. The scene where Dominic breaks into a museum that parodies the “Mission Impossible” laser effects is dumb. The stunt rope dance is trite and the joke offers nothing new to an old idea. As with much of the puns of the film, the Muppets could have been more original.

There are tons of famous cameos in the film. Christopher Waltz dancing the waltz with a Muppet is hilarious, and when one

of main characters from “Goodfellas” sings a Boyz to Men song with a prison gang, it’s hard not to smile. There is such an abundance of famous actors in “Muppets,” you’ll start to look for them in every scene.

“The Muppets Most Wanted” is amusing but nothing special. The songs are nice but nothing you’ll be whistling anytime soon. Some of the humor works, but other jokes completely fall apart. The relationship between Kermit and Miss Piggy is always entertaining, but the idea has been done to death.

When the previous film came out, it served as a revitalization of the Muppets brand. Not only were characters true to the original series, but the humor and quirkiness was surprisingly good for a family movie. “Most Wanted” is a solid film but takes a step back in terms of comedy and originality. If you are not a Muppets fan, this film won’t change your mind, and if you are, you’ll get some enjoyment out of it.

101-WORD RANT JORDIN GIGNAC // DESIGN EDITOR

Okay, to everyone who enjoys watching Hallmark movies, I am sorry for this. Hallmark movies suck. They lack everything a movie is and still get hours and hours of TV time. From the horrible acting and editing skills to the plot lacking substance, all Hallmark movies should be banned from ever being shown to the human eye again. If I have to sit through another woman-who-has-lost-her-way-and-is-now-finding-herself Hallmark film again, I will sew my eye sockets shut. The lack of originality is making me sick and that’s saying a lot because I’ve watched “Howard the Duck” and lived to tell the tale.

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SEND US YOUR 100 WORDS! Please provide your full name, age and major when sending your rant to editor@cod.edu

SPORTS

Midseason baseball update KELLY WEESE // SPORTS EDITOR

After finishing last season with a subpar record, the COD baseball team has begun the year along the same path.

In late February the Chaps opened their schedule with a spring training tournament in Louisiana. The team spent three days in New Orleans where they would play five games.

DuPage played Delgado Community College in their first game. They fell behind 3-0 in the first inning and wouldn’t recover. The Chaps only scored one run in the 12-1 loss on opening day. The rest of the tournament went similarly as COD left New Orleans winless.

On March 14, DuPage earned their first win of the season by beating Spoon River College. A four run fourth inning sealed the 7-5 victory. The Chaps bats came alive with 10 hits.

Last season, COD finished with a 17-26 record. They graduated 12 sophomores, which made this offseason even more important for recovery to get back to a winning record. The team brought in 18 true

freshmen along with a number of redshirt freshman in preparation for this year.

Kyle Hunsinger and Tom Van Kooten, both First Team All-Region selections last year, give the Chaps leadership and experience. Hunsinger plays shortstop and led DuPage with a .471 batting average last season. Hunsinger is signed to play at University of Illinois-Springfield next year.

Van Kooten plays outfield and batted .402 while leading COD in almost every hitting category last season. Both Hunsinger and Van Kooten will play an important role in the Chaps success this season.

This past weekend DuPage earned two more wins with victories over Vincennes and South Suburban.

On Friday against Vincennes, the Chaps scored 5 runs in the second inning. COD almost let Vincennes come back in the last couple innings but a scoreless ninth gave the Chaps the 5-4 win.

DuPage played South Suburban the next morning and cruised to victory. They scored 11 runs and the game was called

after seven innings. The promising start to the weekend ended bitterly with the Chaps dropping their next two games. A 2-0 loss to Harper was followed by a 7-4 loss to South Suburban.

The Chaps record stands at 3-7 with only a third of the schedule behind them.

With conference play coming up after spring break, COD will have some time

off before having to bear down for the remainder of the season. The team’s next home game is Apr. 9 against Kankakee.

The double-header matchup will start at 2 p.m. with the second game starting after the conclusion of the first.

If the Chaps can continue to hit the ball and avoid defensive errors, look for COD to play well against conference opponents.

SPRING SCHEDULE

Baseball

Softball

Track & Field

Men’s Tennis

March:

March:

March:

April:

Wednesday 26 HOME: Aurora at 3:00 p.m.

Thursday 27 AWAY: Harper at 3:00 p.m.

Saturday 29 DuPage Invitational

Thursday 3 AWAY: Sauk Valley at 3:00 p.m.

Saturday 29 HOME: Joliet at 12:00 p.m.

Friday 28 AWAY: Moraine Valley at 3:00 p.m.

Sunday 30 AWAY: Waubonsee at 12:00 p.m.

April: Tuesday 1 HOME: Triton at 3:00 p.m.

April: Friday 4 First Chance Meet Wheaton College Thursday 10 Chicagoland Outdoor Championships Lewis University

Saturday 5 AWAY: Illinois Valley at 2:30 p.m.

Tuesday 8 HOME: Elgin at 3:00 p.m.

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SALOME’S STARS

SEE YOUR JOURNEY CLEARLY.

AS AN ADULT STUDENT, DISCOVER HOW DEPAUL PROVIDES A GREATER PERSPECTIVE TO SHAPE THE PATH TO YOUR FUTURE. DePaul University’s Adult Enrollment Center counselors are here to assist students age 24 or older evaluate which of our programs—traditional, competence-based or accelerated degree completion—suits them best. You can take classes days, nights, weekends and online, allowing you to tailor your schedule to meet your needs. And, you can earn credit for the learning you’ve gained through work, life and school experience. Our one-stop Adult Enrollment Center will help you with the admission process, from transferring your college credit to applying for financial aid.

It’s time to start your journey.

Learn more about DePaul’s adult undergraduate programs at (312) 362-6338 or depaul.edu/aec.

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ARIES (March 21 to April 19) You’ll want to discourage well-meaning but potentially ill-advised interference in what you intend to accomplish. Your work has a better chance to succeed if it reflects you.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) The Bovine’s well-deserved reputation for loyalty could be tested if you learn that it might be misplaced. But don’t rely on rumors. Check the stories out before you decided to act.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) You’ve been going on adrenaline for a long time, and this unexpected lull in a recent spate of excitement could be just what you need to restore your energy levels. Enjoy it.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Friends can be counted on to help you deal with a perplexing personal situation. But remember to keep your circle of advisers limited only to those you’re sure you can trust.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) Security-loving Lions do not appreciate uncertainty in any form. But sometimes changing situations can reveal hidden stresses in time to repair a relationship before it’s too late.

VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) This is a good time for single Virgos to make a love connection. Be careful not to be too judgmental about your new “prospect” -- at least until you know more about her or him.

LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Your sense of justice helps you resolve a problem that might have been unfairly attributed to the wrong person. Spend the weekend doing some long-neglected chores.

SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) You might feel justified in your anger toward someone you suspect betrayed your trust. But it could help if you take the time to check if your suspicions have substance.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) Ignore distractions if you hope to accomplish your goal by the deadline you agreed to. Keep the finish line in sight, and you should be able to cross it with time to spare.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Your creative self continues to dominate through much of the week. Also, despite a few problems that have cropped up, that recent romantic connection seems to be thriving.

AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) As curious as you might be, it’s best to avoid trying to learn a colleague’s secret.

That sort of knowledge could drag you into a difficult workplace situation at some point down the line.

PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Instead of spending too much time floundering around wondering if you can meet your deadline, you need to spend more time actually working toward reaching it.

BORN THIS WEEK: You have a natural gift for attracting new friends, who are drawn to your unabashed love of what life should be all about. (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc.

COFFEE BREAK

MARCH 12 ANSWERS

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COFFEEBREAK

SOCIAL

STRAIGHTtalk

OVER

Advice, answers and no

HEARD

Straight Talk is an advice column aimed at questions you’d ask your best friend...except Straight Talk won’t fluff the answers. Real advice for real issues, from someone who has been there, done that. To get your questions answered, email overheardcod@gmail.com

“It’s a known fact; they always come back.”

Needy boyfriend?

My boyfriend wants to be with me 24/7. I work full-time and go to school part-time, so it’s really difficult to juggle everything lately. I’ve been very focused on my grades so there have been a lot of nights where I stay home to study instead of hanging out with him. I just want him to understand my schedule and be supportive of my goals. I don’t want my priorities to affect our relationship.

-Busy Gal Dear Busy Gal, Good for you for putting your education first. You clearly are driven and on the right track – and your boyfriend needs to understand that. He should be encouraging you to continue pursuing your goals and not make you feel bad for not being with him 24/7. He sounds a bit selfish and needy. A relationship should be bringing you up, not weighing you down. If he can’t respect that you’re dedicated to your studies and are a hard worker with a busy schedule, maybe he needs to go find someone who can hold his hand every second. You should also start thinking about if you’re even at a spot right now where you can handle such a high maintenance relationship.

“Is that scarf real!? I’m allergic to cats.”

“Where can I find Doritos... that’s all I want.”

“I’m just saying... she needs to gain ten pounds.“ “Team crazy and proud!”

CHRISTINA’S CLASSIFIEDS

Contact: paytonc359@cod.edu // 630.942.3379 // codcourier.org

JOBS

JOBS

TUTORING

ADVERTISE

HELP WANTED ASAP! Insurance Agency needs evenings and Saturday help.

30 hours a week. Must speak English and Spanish. Located in Wooddale. Contact Sam at 630.677.1588.

CHEMISTRY Professional chemist for tutoring. 20 year member of the American Chemical Society. Basic levels through advanced organic, plus hands-on demos of basic lab procedures. $30/hr. write to: ebam@earthlink.net for more information.

ADVERTISE HERE Reach the COD Community in print and online! Sign up for a classified ad for up to 50 words for just $25 per issue.

Include a logo at no additional charge!

OFF CAMPUS

PART TIME WORK The Stand in Downtown Glen Ellyn is looking to fill both Line Cook and Cashier positions for weekday evenings and weekends. Positions can be flexible to your schedule. Please apply in person at 542 Crescent Blvd in Glen Ellyn directly next door to the Glen Theater.

JOBS ON CAMPUS

WRITERS THE COURIER will soon be hiring students to join our team for the 2014-15 school year!

Email your interest to Christina at paytonc359@cod.edu, inquire within, or fill out an application online at codcourier.org. Hourly and freelance positions available.

ON CAMPUS COD students earn $9.30 per hour tutoring fellow students. Stop by the Learning Commons, in SRC 2102, for application information or call 630.942.3686 or email tutoring@cod.edu.

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JOBS

OFF CAMPUS

GREAT SUMMER JOB Top pay. Certified Lifeguards positions. All Chicago suburbs No experience necessary. Will train and certify. Look for an application on our website www.poolguards.com 630) 692-1500 Email: work@spmspools.com

OFF CAMPUS

MATH OR SCIENCE Math or Science tutor for Individuals and SmallGroups, Certified Teacher, 20+ Years.

Experience in Physics, Chem, Most Math thru Calc. Contact Rebekah Haworth (630)886-6341 dupagetutoring.com

Your Elmhurst

Experience A warm welcome. As a transfer student at Elmhurst, you’ll get to know plenty of people with experiences like yours.

About one in three of our students comes to us from another college, and we welcome more than 300 transfer students to campus each fall. We understand your needs and concerns, and we’re deeply committed to your success.

Scholarship support. Elmhurst offers special transfer scholarships to qualified students. Depending on your GPA and number of credits, you could qualify for up to $19,000 a year in scholarship funding.

A smooth transition. Our admission counselors will make sure your transfer experience goes smoothly. We offer generous transfer credit, and we’ll even evaluate your credits before you apply.

Contact us (630) 617-3400 admit@elmhurst.edu www.elmhurst.edu/admission 190 Prospect Avenue Elmhurst, Illinois

Chrissy Stelter I’ve changed a lot since I’ve been at Elmhurst. I’ve met people from different backgrounds and different religions, and it’s helped me become a more open and welcoming person.

LEADING WITH VALUES

Elmhurst is coming to COD! Wednesday, April 9, 2014, from 10:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m., 2nd floor near Starbucks.

Romison Saint-Louis Last year I went to help rebuild New Orleans with Habitat for Humanity. I wasn’t much into community service before. Now I’m passionate about it.

See you there!

INTELLECTUAL EXCELLENCE

COMMUNITY

SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY

STEWARDSHIP

FAITH, MEANING AND VALUES

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