comeback june 2016 // issue #3
normality the
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comeback is a collection of stories with the sole purpose of helping anyone lost to find a path. comeback believes that no one is in the same place as another. comeback reaches through the vast resources available to today’s generation and takes back the purest, realist advice to provide a beginning for self-discovery, motivation, and curiosity. A comeback is not a return to former glory; it’s going beyond what was thought possible.
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editor and founder: Iris Zhou contributors: Amy McDonald Lauren Marinigh Sara Combs Shey-Ana Makay Talha A. Khawaja comebackmag@gmail.com PO Box 27451 Seattle,WA 98165 ISSN 2471-7002
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so, what is normal? is following the norm bad? does wanting to follow trends make us less original? why does ‘be yourself ’ always seem to mean just a little different? does normal change, or just our view of it?
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contents -NORMCORE
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-WHAT NORMAL LOOKS LIKE; Shey-Ana
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-TEENS and NORMALITY
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-NORMAL in 9 PHOTOS -from DREAMS to DESTINY: STEP 4 -WHY I HAVEN’T QUIT MY JOB
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NORMCORE:
in a 2013 report by trend-forcasting company, K-Hole, the attitude of normcore was introduced as the contrast to the oh-so popular need to be individual. Read the full report on their website, khole.net
PHOTO FROM NBC’S PARKS AND RECREATION
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“In normcore, one does not pretend to be above the indignity of belonging.” “You have to understand that there is no such thing as normal.” “Normcore capitalizes on the possibility of misinterpretation as an opportunity for connection not as a threat to authenticity.” “Individuality was once the path to personal freedom - a way to lead life on your own terms. But those terms keep getting more and more specific, making us more and more isolated. Normcore seeks the freedom that comes with non-exclusivity. It finds liberation in being nothing special, and realizes that adaptibility leads to belonging.”
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WHAT NORMAL LOOKS LIKE
Traipsing around Cape St. Mary’s Ecological Reserve is not my normal day but for the thousands of birds that make nests upon their rocks, this is about as normal as it gets.
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Shey-Ana Makay is an non-descript office worker in Edmonton, Canada. She lives for her travel escapes whether in her home province Alberta or her better half ’s home province of Newfoundland. Being able to photograph and share her adventures is just a bonus!
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Normal is idle chicks. No calling or flapping for food or attention. One false move will end in a fall to the depths below.
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What is normal for this seabird rookery? Normal is fields upon fields of small purple crocuses dotting the cliffs.
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Normal is a plump sheep taking in the ocean breeze and ignoring those pesky humans who interrupt their afternoon slumber.
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Normal is stumbling upon thousands of Northern Gannets precariously perched on a rocky pillar. Plunge diving into the water and swooping up overhead. Normal is sitting on their one egg for over 40 days. Fiercely defending nests and never leaving chicks alone.
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Normal is creating a thunderous racket. Making the rocks come alive with a deafening sound and a wave movement.
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Normal for me isn’t getting to witness such an amazing display of nature. I wish it was.
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Yet, I can’t help but be amazed at how utterly routine this is for the thousands of seabirds who have been returning to this breeding ground for several hundred years. Fighting, fishing, and risking their lives. Just another normal year.
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what is normal ?
BY AMY MCDONALD 24
Everyone says normal is boring; if you’re normal then you’re lacking any sort of imagination. It’s quite easy to agree with that idea considering the dictionary definition is ‘to conform to a standard’. But what is this standard? Should we be changing our lives to fit in? What actually is normal?
I feel that the label of a normal teenager is now found at the bottom of a vodka bottle or at the end of someone else’s bed. If you’re not out partying way into the morning by the age of fifteen then something is wrong and if your makeup doesn’t make you look older by at least five years then something is very wrong. I’m not saying those things are bad but should they really be considered normal? And should you be shamed if you would rather stay at home in bed with a cup of tea? We strive to fit into a society, especially as teenagers, which at times accepts everyone but will happily create a new ideal to watch us fight to be a part of it and fit in. Everyone wants to fit in; everyone wants to be considered normal whether they admit that or not. But is it worth it? Magazines, social media, books and films have told us to act in certain ways if you are a certain person. Jocks are big headed boys who sleep around,
nerds have glasses and refuse to go to prom, every girl who likes Starbucks is basic, liking quirky things makes you ‘tumblr’ and writing poetry makes you pretentious. You can’t win. At some point you slip into a category where you are normal, and most likely comfortable, until you grow up, move on and find another uncomfortable category. I remember going to prom and feeling out of place compared to all the other girls. My dress was simple, I did my own hair and makeup, my nails were a mess but the main thing was, I really didn’t care. This was abnormal, especially when you think about all the films and T.V shows based on American high schools. I was quite like that one annoying girl rebelling against prom and its social standards. I’m really not that person though. The normal was to take too may selfies with hair bigger
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than themselves and dance around the disco. My shoes were off after an hour and I can promise you that at no point was my Facebook profile picture of me at prom. I can, however, also promise that I enjoyed it just as much as the big haired girls even though I never once touched up my lipstick. I was comfortable and happy whether that was normal or not. Although, I was considered normal at school with my pristine uniform, on time course work, and dark under eye circles. What I’m trying to say is this whole concept of normal that we’ve been conditioned to have clearly changes daily and honestly does not matter. Being stressed and sad is considered normal now too, while you sit through exams with a broken heart. Is it really though? Or has society reached such a low point that the only way to justify how bad teenagers are feeling is to class it as normal, give them a hug and a pep talk and send them on their way? As I sit here now I’m stressing about exams and am trying my hardest to pretend it’s not happening, I know that everyone else my age is going through the same, but it feels wrong. Why should I be losing sleep over a question we all have or will answer? That doesn’t feel right; it doesn’t feel normal. So surely it’s not?
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I decided to do my research before writing this and I came across this quote: “Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly”. I think it’s perfect. What is normal for you is probably not for me. In fact, I think most of us consider ourselves abnormal and that everything we don’t do is normal. This was made clear to me after I made a blog post all about being a supposedly
“Has society reached such a low point that the only way to justify how bad teenagers are feeling is to class it as normal?”
normal teenager in society, the comments I got all agreed with me. None of them considered themselves normal, which made me question it even more. If no one thinks of themselves as normal, who actually is? And why do we try and achieve normal when we don’t really understand it ourselves? I hate to admit it to you but we are all in fact normal. I bet you eat, brush your teeth, sleep, check your phone and go to the toilet - all completely normal, essential tasks. I’m sure most girls have tried a concealer and most boys have played football. Those stereotypes are normal, at least that’s what we’ve been brought up to think. I think we have to accept that there is no one definition of what is normal but that we all tend to follow the norm. We go to school, we do exams, we get a job, we follow the cycle. That is definitely normal. I’ll admit that sometimes being told something is normal can help. When you are sweating
over a speaking presentation but you see everyone else doing the exact same can be slightly reassuring. Same for when you find a group of friends who will happily watch films, drink tea and eat cheese on a Saturday night. The fact that they consider it normal can create such a warm feeling inside. But when the people in the public eye are two years older and are married and having kids while drinking and traveling the world, it can make you question your normality. This is wrong. You should never have to question yourself or change who you are to conform, to a standard.
Amy is a 17 year old college student living in England, runs a small blog, and is on every social media possible. She loves her corner of the internet and it revolves around fashion, lifestyle and all sorts of written pieces like stories and poems.
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WHAT NORMAL LOOKS LIKE IN 9 PHOTOS Sara Combs is an Oklahoma-based fine art film photographer and cinematographer who specializes in weddings and portrait work. She lives with her husband and 3 dogs and travels nationally for weddings and campaigns. Her photography style is natural, candid, and real. With a use of mostly natural light and the true chemistry of photography, she maintains integrity and honesty in her images which show the stories she captures brilliantly.
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from
DREAMS
to
DESTINY BY TALHA A. KHAWAJA
STEP 3: Implementing “Division of Labor” While arriving at this point has taken a lot of dedication and hard work for you, the real challenge will only now begin to reveal itself. After having completed the previous two steps of this column, you now find yourself facing a completely new situation. So far, you have spent countless days in self-reflection; figuring out what it is you want to do. You have taken the time to inform your family and loved ones, presenting them with every reason as to why you have chosen this path for yourself. You have accomplished the “what” and you have discovered the “why”. Now, it is time to turn your attention to the “how” aspect of your dream career. One of the biggest factors to consider in pursuing your goals is what it takes to get to them and how to get there. At first glance, the prospect of trying to accomplish everything that you want to
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do within your new field may seem like an impossible task. It may seem like an uphill battle that you feel you cannot win simply because so many people have failed to get there. Due to this, “making it” in your new field may seem too good to be true. The idea of having to complete all that work on your own may also be daunting, especially considering the fact that you have taken the risk of abandoning something familiar to do something you have a passion for but which may be somewhat or completely shrouded in uncertainty. In this situation, it is important to remain calm. Rest assured, the thoughts going through your head right now have crossed the minds of all others bold enough to forge their own paths. So, instead of worrying about the future, it is necessary to organize your present. The technique of organizing your life to pursue your goals is one that requires a change in mindset. With the thought of dreams being very difficult to achieve, people tend to forget that having success in a particular field is all about taking the
small steps to get there. Division of labor is a concept that is used in economics and business that follows a similar procedure to this. Division of labor is all about taking a large, complex process and breaking it down in to simpler tasks that can be done a lot more efficiently than attempting to do everything at once. This concept can be applied with great ease to your situation too as well as daily life in general. Instead of thinking of how complicated your goals may be to pursue, your focus should be on breaking up these goals in to small and easier to follow tasks. It may be wise to involve your loved ones in this process as well. This is because it is important to remember that telling your family was not only about having the moral support to do what you wanted to do but also to have help in making important decisions for the hurdles up ahead. Here, they can be really useful in helping you organize your work in to these tasks and seeing which ones they could be of use to you in. One particularly important step, in which your family can contribute to helping you out with, is research. Generally, careers tend to have their own list of steps to be completed. However, research seems to be an aspect that every career seems to have in common. At this critical juncture, it is one of the key aspects to achieving your goals. Whereas in the previous issues, it was mentioned that research could be used to get to know more about your field, it can be used, by this stage, to find out about potential work opportunities for you to undertake. Using research, you can find out what qualifications you need to get in to your field at an entry level or higher position.
You can find out various details about these opportunities such as if any of your prior education can be used to your advantage, the types of work experience needed or any other expectations that may be required of you to gain prominence in your field. Research is important, not only because it gives you greater insight in to what you’re up against and what you will be required to do, but also because it acts as a platform from where you can complete smaller tasks that build up to your larger goal. Through everything mentioned above, it can be seen that division of labor plays a large role in resolving the “how� aspect of your dream job. It helps to ease your uncertainties and presents you with a clearer picture of how to achieve your goals. The process provides you with small tasks that build up to larger roles due to which you gain the necessary experience to follow your dreams. Most of all though, applying this concept to your life allows you to gain a stream of small successes; successes that give you the confidence to continue to pursue your passions in the long run and that ultimately allow you to turn what was once just a dream of yours in to destiny.
this is the last installment of our step by step guide to finding and achieving your goals. read the complete series in our previous issues.
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why i quit my the travel
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haven’t job to world BY LAUREN MARINIGH
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Living in North America, our definition of success is much different than other parts of the world. You’re expected to go to university or college to get an education that will help you land a career upon graduation, and you’ll work your way up to be the next leader in your industry. Being able to earn a salary that allows you to support yourself and your lifestyle is essentially what will earn you the title of “successful”. And to be honest, this is how I define success for myself as well (I can’t help it; this is how I was brought up).
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n this day-in-age, you see headlines everywhere on social media telling and showing us how people are disrupting the traditional workforce. People are offering their advice and sharing their stories on how to quit our lives to travel the world. I can’t help but roll my eyes every time I see one of these posts. I feel as if these writers are giving people the false idea that the only way they can travel is to follow the lifestyle they chose. So I want to show you an example of a regular everyday person who has been able to make traveling the world, and having a life and career back home, work for her. I work in social media marketing and content development, a job that easily can be done from a beach in Bali or from a café in Paris. It’s not surprising that I get asked all the time why I don’t quit the 9-5-cubicle life to work remotely on my own schedule. To me, the thought of this is tempting at times, and I think it can be tempting to everyone, but I like the life and reputation I’ve built for myself here at home.
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Being able to earn a salary that allows you to support yourself and your lifestyle is essentially what will earn you the title of “successful”. As someone who was bitten by the travel bug when I was young, a part of me does envy these people who have left it all behind to forge their own path, wherever in the world that may be. But I’ve always been someone who is equally as passionate about building my career, right here at home. I am a creature of habit, someone who has grown up with a schedule and a routine. I like knowing how much I’m going to be making each month and where my next paycheck is coming from. To me, this not only helps me support myself, but it is also the fuel
Lauren is a Toronto, Canada based marketing professional and travel blogger. Her blog, Twirl The Globe, was created to inspire other 9-5 professionals to get out there and see the world.
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for my travel aspirations. I balance my career in social media marketing, freelance social media consulting and writing, as well as my own travel blog, which requires me to travel to have something to write about. In my job I receive three weeks holiday. For those with constant wanderlust running through their veins, three weeks is just not enough. How have I made this work for me? I take advantage of long weekends, I plan trips that are closer to home, and ask my employer for unpaid vacation to cover the trips that I want to take when I’ve run out of my allocated vacation days. For some people, this isn’t ideal. But for me, it works! I love adventure; I love traveling, exploring new places, learning about new cultures and traditions, and being pushed out of my comfort zone. The truth is I’m living proof that you can have a balance of both. I haven’t chosen to pursue my own business venture or become a full-time freelancer because I know that those choices require a different level of commitment and hustle. I commend those who have the self-discipline to be their own boss, but it’s not for everyone, and it’s not for me. But balancing a career, freelancing and blogging, makes just about anyone question how I’d even have time to travel. The simple answer is prioritization. Travel and my career are two of my top priorities in life. With freelancing, I pick and choose the projects I take on because I’m not dependent on this income; it’s just nice to have. If there’s a month I don’t have time to take on new side projects, I don’t. Realizing your passions
and prioritizing them over anything else is what’s going to make you the happiest. I am constantly surrounded by people who continue to tell me how lucky I am to travel, or how they wish they could be like me, and the truth is, you can be. When my friends are prioritizing marriage, starting a family, saving their money to buy a house, my priority is travel. That’s what is the most important to me at this point in my life, and what I’ve decided to make a priority. Many people have this misconception that you have to quit the conventional life to be able to travel the world. That you have to be able to work remotely, or be making a six-figure salary, but that isn’t true. If you are passionate about something, and you know that something will make you happy, do it. Travel can be accessible to almost anyone, not just those living a nomadic lifestyle, or those that have excessive disposable income. One of my favorite quotes is; “Happiness is a journey, not a destination.” people are so busy chasing happiness with the mindset that someday they’ll be happy, someday they’ll travel or someday they’ll be in a job that makes them happy. Would you rather spend your whole life unhappy waiting for that someday or spend your whole like happy? If travel is something you want to do, do it. Find a way to make it work into your life, and book that plane ticket.
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