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A R T S
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C 0 M M U N I C A T I 0 N A R T S
53
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suu , d1vtde the fare by twenty And 1f you're wearmg Oared trousers, with a 'make love, not war' T-shm, dJv1~ the fare by tWO. Or posstbly, double it. THE INSOMNlAC
l ~RlSH ~~URSE IN DElLING WITH ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Then theft:
a~
No way out? Nonsauc: ...Just thfOIN up.
WeU, wehopcyou'vc found the helpful hmtS hsted here informariv~ Wealsohopcyouusc them when tnvdling in Afterall.atTrussardiwe.
rtbtivcs in countries nght across n. ............... - - - . . . -... w.-...... o.-. make some of the world's finest the world. leather suitcases. passport hokhs and other mvd actt~soncs. And , u such, we have a ~ted antcrest in making sur.: G1vm thJs respons1bihty. n is e:uy to undttstand why thq'rc so grumpy. And why they work such long hours. that peopk who tnvd continut ~o tnvtl. Or should we say, rid1culou.s hours. Now, whilst this may make the1r bank accounts look slighdy better, It nukes their driving look a lot worst. So if you hop in a taxi, and notice the driver has matchsticks holding hiscyesopen,orthcre'sfiftcen empty coffee cups in the front seat, ho p out agam. lfhefalls:uleep.hemayncver wakt:up. Andncithttmayyou. ntE 'SPECIAL SHORTCUT' Thu IS some thing tO avo1d at all costs.(Andcostsarcthenub,herc)
lav.tory).
cctremes
d~mtirccity.
driving isn't ouctly the most fin:mci:ally rewarding of professions. On cop of this. the ma)O"ty of wei driven S«m tO be supportang a w1fe. nine lods and a host of
Till DRIVERS IN F~REIGN ~~UNTRIES '''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''"'''''''''''''''''''' ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
~~~::;s=;;:;
ham to forget the spectal shortcut he may take It as an md1cauon that , once again, you'd like a guided tour of
1n ~pen
ruru to contend with. AJ well as tht
prosp«t of losmg one's lugg1ogc. being robbed or, heaven forbid , forgetting to tipdl<bdlboy. H~.u pnilousuthesethingt
may be:, they paJe in comparison to, without doubt, the most dangaous of .tU . . .,.. iliol.""-"' -· 1 travt.llingpnctlCCS. rudinginwcis. Unforturutc:ly, th~'s no rut way to avoid this.(Unkss..ofcounc, you're: pl'q)ared to atch a bus.Wluch, mor~ often than not, is~) .
And if you hirt ~:-;;:-;:-::.':::-.=:...":"" a car or walk , there's a dishnct possibility of being tut by a UXI . However, txforr: you cancel your 0Yene2s holicby, we suggest you read the information that follows carefully. HOW FAIR JS ntE FARE? In most parts oftM world, axis haw mttrrs. lnthcscplaca. oiMously)'OU've no say m how much your fare 1s gotngtobc:mthccnd
hundred doll ars before: you've even blinked) . Howcver,lfthetaxiyou'reridingandocsn'thaveamctcr, or it's hidden under the dri~ 's hat, thttt you're faced with an entirely differmt problem. 1llC' 6nt rule here is to neva accrpt the 6rst pn« offerN bythcdnYCT. lnstod, you must haggle. Now, how much you haggle depends entirely on what you're wearing. If you look like an Arabian o1l Shdk,divxl<thc&n:byonchundml. If you're wearing an expens1ve
,.......,.__,MMol.---k ...... __ Whtnataxidnversaysheknows a special shortcut , unless ht's also a barbcr, whathc~allymeansasthathe
1ntmds to give you a guided tour of the cnurecitybcforecvc:ntuaUydroppmg youatyourdcsrirucion. On the other hand, should you ttU
IAI"-• o........I,._, N.w i-OodleNw!:.~~.o.,.--....~s.......,o-...u..,c-
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How To ~CK ~cKroCKET. A
Youthe nn~pmandr«:ovtr your
dough. (Useful tunt: For some reason invaauon for the chiefs particular
thts method has had the most stnlong
bknd ofh•nky-p•nky.
success in Poland . Something you11
In the end, we probably get
find out 1f you ever vacauon there.)
what wtcksttve.
THE SYSTEM SHUT- DOWN
lfyou areoncofthoscpeople
METHOD .
for whom concepts like "nih
Our favouritt' , howev.:r, is the Oa::oy Ploy. 11m mvolve1 stuffing a wallccintoeachbackpockct .Orcarrymg two handbags. To understand the efficacy of this parucular method. you should know somtthmg abo ut the nature of the Pnty llu<(
down-paymems" and "a surething-quinella" make the
cyt'S
mtst over, allow us to offer somt helpful adviCe. Is THAT A WALLET IN YOUR POCKET OR ARE YOU JUST GLAD
Ha is a hf.: driven by smgh~-
TO SEE ME !
lfyou carry a wall.:t, for
trundcdn.::ss. lfthcn you prtS('nt tum With an opuon, he11 be forced tO malt.: lWIOWt.S~~I+IWft.IW.~IIO-Al~....,tU''OI""ll"'U<""-'l'O<IIAHOOtuloM\/AfUAHO COUII1
THE I NSTANT P OLIS H POLKA PARTY ,
Handbag earners will apprtt!alt: this 01'\11:. It's m6rutely mort \ difficultforthePick-
IAHKHORSO H . . OS<ASI.
1
Fit your handbag wnh a musical chip that plays Polish polka-muJic when (orobly opened.
l
~::po.~t~ it::;....--.;_
Rendering him nothinB but a US('kss. babbling \.'~ctabl~ For your part , you11 have your money and the undymg
\/
lfhe tnes, you1J probably catch him in the aa. =•'=;~ ce rt<~.ml y
Not to be admirttJ perhaps. But
to be
nurvc.Uedatforlustechruquc. L1ke a talented ptantst
1n
hos fing<." ddowdy moss th<
_-:• ·;:,--_~~~~E·~~i~
so 1nc:redibly easy for him?
W.:.lka andhandbagsstuffrd to breaking pomt, wewaddleaboutthestrttts. an open
-
" ''
• -
wallctorhandbagpinchcd,
~
The second reason IS that he11 have to come fact: to fac.:
not<S. ~~ · . 1 . f
~~3::..~
you snll end up having your
Then you can stick ham with an indecent assault ~:':.":"~ c harge and hav.: him locked away for good . ""..:!~
full swmg, he shdes
_- -
' _-
·:~~.~~. -ro; : f'ICa~•~ -.oonc.wM1'.
a deCISIOn between the tWO.
As thiS is totally contud1ctory to hu nature. h.: w11l 1mplodew1tharuocty.
we offer one last
pu~c.: o(
advicr for you . Carry
woth you on otd<r to m<k u . ln whkh
cheque books. Benusc: .,. atTrusurdiw.:havea vr:strdmtercstinKangthat or not he's single.
'I'OUINOVI..OOIVll nM .... IM l'CH.fl:f>OW'II lOMOl.ON'to'I'OUI HAMOU.O. MO\IIItiVll, fMd If DI 'IHifUt AM l.UimoH.
ductS go together. And stay together
b«ause there's not quit.: as much room for the gents, has proven to be a b1g hu wuh members oftht: fairer soc .
-------------~-------------C O MMUNICAT IO N A R TS
77
C 0 M M U N I C A T I 0 N
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Copenhag••n Is just waking up this time of year. Midwinter's four hours of daylight intoamorehospltableaevenandelghthours.ByJuly, tourlsuean until nearly midnight. il'l hard to be In a bad mood when ll'saunny 10 mueht't said Manager Bente Nellsent one of20 Northwest Copenhagen employees. capital city quickly become beneftclarlesofOanl h good lsonereason the cltylssuchapopularvacatlon spot. spealtEngllsh andwillgladlypracticetheir secondlanguage. Ask about national hen><" and you'll hear of Hans Ch ristian Andersen , whose falrytales
I
sisters, Little Cayman and Cayman Brae. Most of the action (or non-acllon, de· pendlnaonyourmood}llon Orand G.yman. The lslandt area Britlshrolonyand the lifestyteia Western - wttha dash or lald·back JamaiCL As in Enaland , ban are caiJed •pubt" anddrivin&ls onthelert. Mostvtsitorsare rromtheUnltedSwea."You
can stay here and not. feel like you are In a forelan country," ll)'l MukNebon, Northwest's aene ral man· a&erfortheCaymans. It should be no surprise thatactivltyonthe iJiands
revotvtsaroundthe~e~.Sall·
ina, waterskli n&, paruall· lng.ftshinaand,aboveall, akin and scuba divln& are consideffilamona the bet
In the Caribbean. Reputable dl\-e shops, such as Soc.o's Di· ving, provide auides and equipmentforcard-carryina sc uba divers. Snorkeli n& ,ear is widely available for rent. One top dive s pot It I "The Wall" - a spectacular 8,()()().rootunderwaterprecipice visible to snorkelera rromthesurfaceandhostto
I
Caymans' maey attractions. In years, came within an D~n, lovers and all who worship the sun an vtsitlnt thesequietCaribbeanaem• in arowina numbers. Llu~ wonder. The Caymant otrer aomeolthebeltrelaxation Lhi.JtldeorVaJh&IIL the Clymans! For starters there is a white-sand beach almost seven miles lona. Thenthere isthesun, whleh warms the ialandtoa neal" perreet 85 dearees f'aren· heltlnwinter. The.unshlnt is said by one Caymans en-
e~lash ol their shorn But damaae was li&ht on the Caymana, and manyreiOrtl lhruged ofl' the etrecu of Lhe ple within a week. How·
~r, wordolthequickrecov
booklnp th is ytar to the iJ. Lands have noc. returned to normal. TuekedbelowCubanearly SOO mile south of Miami, the Caymans comprise three lslandt- the main IJ~ of Grand Cayman and Ill two
The Cayman Islands: For Sunlovers Only C 0 M M U N I C A T I 0 N A R T S
93
Pro Bono Publico ad for Direction Sports, based on an experience told by O.J. Simpson, named as one of the unreal people in the ad. Though the ad might seem mild today, it was adventuresome in 1969. One publication did change the headline to "My Idol, the Thief:' Follow-up ad for a series that had offered testimonials from testing labs using Fairchild semiconductor test equipment.
Redeem
MY IDOL,THE PIMR When you're born in a ghetto, odds are ten to one you'll never get out. What's worse is, you know it. You know it from the first day you step into society and fail . That first day of school. So what do you do? Well, you look down the street at the corner. And you see a guy with a chick on each arm, a $200 custom tailored suit, and you say: " Man, I'm gonna be just like him. He was born here. He lives here. And he's beaten it. He lives here and he ain't part of the garbage. I'm gonna be just like him.H Not like O.J. Simpson. otlike Willie Mays. o~Iike Mike Garrett or Bill Russell. Because nobody's really like them. At least, nobody you know. So right then and there you decide. I I years old and you decide to place a value on your future. You' re going to be a pimp. Because when you're born in a ghetto, that's what you do. But you weren't born in a ghetto, were you? And it really isn't your problem. Right. It's ours.
Then you become part of a team. And you're not alone. If you miss a basket the first time, you learn how to make it the second time. Or the third. If you never could understand math, you suddenly become a pro at batting averages. And instead of being a boy from the gheuo, you're Tommy Brown. Football player. umber 16. You're somebody.
thyself!
(
5,)
If you missed coupons 1thru send in coupon '6.
Here's where you can help. We need money. $10.$20.$50. We need it for helmets, for sneakers, for footballs. And for whatever else it takes to make these kids feel like pros. We want you to use the coupon. In return for your contribution, which is tax deductible, we'll send you an a utographed picture of one of our teams and a schedule of the games for this season. If the plight of these underprivileged kids isn't enough to move you, if the little rew'ard
~--------------
Ifyou're coocemed about semiconductor test system rellablllty. send this coopoo to Floyd K.lruleg.
g:ii"'
Direction S ports. We help kids. Bright underprivileged kids. ot by recognizing the symptoms, but by attacking the causes. We're interested in building self esteem. We' re interested in giving these kids an identity. And attitudes. And a reason for being. How do we do all this? As our name implies, with sports. But as our we can offer isn't enough reason, maybe this is : name also implies, with direction. No matter what your profession is, Quite simply, we took the universal magnetism no mauer where you grew up, or who your father of everyday sports and turned it into · • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • was, no matter if you couldn't 0 : afford a movie every Saturday, a tool for teaching and motivating. : :,;~:::'~ ..':,!~ It works. LooAoae"'-ColllomloOOOI9. • no matter what course ""'"-'"m''-""""n"""" : your life may have taken, Because no matter who you ar~ no
matter where you come
from, when you're II or 12 years old,
~~::~~·~::~~~~~~i~.~~~ked.
::c~y uniforms lor lbe kkta on
•
---------
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Coupon'6. I •IMM/«JJ'I.,.,.,I./OIIoa'l.l'fUI'I.UCor. .'l
-.--.w,,_....t .. ,.,ta..,oi.Udldl'
...wwn...b/WM1'fq-•kltol,ot!CII-
or how many failures
.........,.., ............ """"., : you've experienced,
:-:,::~;;':,':,"'-"" : ;~~~~~~r ~~:~~;e~f~~go~dpimp.
... ~---------
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C 0 M M U N I C A T I 0 N
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