To The Young People of Today

from March 2022 Volume 4 Issue 7

Youth and Business

“Build the fundamental skills that let you respond to rapidly evolving challenges in the future. Learn to think critically, creatively, and in systems. Understanding how a computer works and how we move our ideas into software is also really valuable. Everyone needs to be able to learn quickly and respond. That is the core competency required for most future work.

Become a student of human nature and cultivate a strong self-reflective practice that seeks to improve the quality of your thinking and acting.”

A Message to the Youth of Today

Unfortunately the truth is that we only see the world from our perspective and our perspective can be very wrong at times.

Al Del Degan

Perspective is a word that basically

means from your own point of view. The way things look, feel, or sound to you rather than to someone else. As we grow, our mind grows and all the experiences in our life build upon one another giving us new insights and new perspectives.

At any particular point in your life, in your mind, you feel like you know what is right, what is wrong, and where the “grey areas” are. In simple terms, we always think that we are pretty smart, and everyone else is clueless, especially our parents. That is because from our perspective, certain things make sense and we expect that everyone else thinks the same way as us.

Unfortunately the truth is that we only see the world from our perspective and our perspective can be very wrong at times. Let’s look at a realistic example to clarify my point. Let’s say you are sitting in a restaurant with your friend and you notice a person a few tables away that keeps staring at you. They have a very disapproving facial expression and it is bothering you a great deal. You mention to your friend “don’t make it obvious by looking, but do you see that person a few tables away that keeps staring at us? How rude, do I have pasta sauce on my face or something?”. Your friend immediately sides with you, and for the next few minutes your conversation is taken up talking about it as you both start to get angry. Eventually the person is interrupted by their server coming by to ask if they need anything else. Would your perspective change if you knew that the person at the other table just came from visiting their mother at the hospital, and that their mother only has a week or so to live? Would knowing that they were simply looking out the window that is right behind you while they were in deep thought and upset about their mother’s situation? Of course it would, and you might feel a bit silly thinking it was all about you.

The way we see colors, the way our brains process sounds and form memories is very different from everyone else, to some degree. Things that you find so simple, or easy, or obvious, are often the opposite of that to someone else. Don’t believe me? Do you recall the viral phenomenon of “The dress” back in 2015 where people argued over a washed out photograph of a dress posted on Facebook (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_dress). To some the dress was gold and white, but to others it was black and blue. Within a week, more than ten million tweets mentioned the dress. Spoiler… the dress was black and blue, but the designer ended up making a gold and white version in response to all the attention. Why do we all get so passionate about the way we see things? How many court battles and lawyers fees could have been saved if people could take the time to think about the other person’s perspective? If you want to live your best life, keep in the front of your mind that everyone has a different perspective. When people do or say something that you don’t agree with, try to suppress your feelings until you can consider what their perspective might be. As hard as it might be, if you can put yourself in someone else’s shoes, you may just realize that rather than being right or wrong, it could just be a matter of perspective.

PERMISSION TO BE

YOU.

Jennifer Hadley

Gone are the days where the only “right way” of having success depended on going to school, getting a job, building a family and then living the middle-class dream. There are so many different streams to success available to us now that we can choose from. The old model was set up for war times and for economic growth based on the factory models. Although with all of the world’s chaos lately, it may seem we are right back there, however our future has never been so “in our own hands” before. This is an exciting time and an opportunity to really live the life you want to live – not the life that you’ve been told you “should” live.

I don’t live on the edge, or think of myself as some sort of martyr for no longer doing the traditional things in life – I have! I went to university after high school, and left because I didn’t want to commit to years of learning something I didn’t know I wanted to do – that’s a huge financial and time commitment if you’re not committed! Then I worked in the hospitality, spent money like a mad woman because it was easy enough to make it all back the next day. Then got married, had kids, went back to school, got a “real job” and the only thing that actually lasted from all of that was the fact that I still have kids, and a huge amount of credit card debt because I never saved a penny. I’ve been fired from a lot of “real jobs” and left my marriage 8 years ago because I was absolutely miserable. The way it looks on the outside is that I failed. My family saw it that way, and I let myself think that too.

But I didn’t fail – I did it all, and then finally understood that I am just not built for the traditional life that we were conditioned to live. And that’s OK! Knowing who you really are in a world that is constantly changing is a real gift. A gift that gives you true insight into where you should be, based on your own purpose and values – not someone else’s. This is different for everyone, some people love that life, and it works for them. I am so grateful that there are those out there that LOVE accounting, and LOVE insurance, and LOVE the 9-5 where they can go to work, do their thing, and shut it off at the end of the day. Some days I wish I could do that too. But the universe keeps firing me from those jobs, keeps pulling me into this entrepreneurial/contactor life, because it knows that’s who I really am. Even though a consistent paycheque provides a lot of security, I found that the security of that had a huge cost on my soul. There was a lot of unbalanced energy around my wanting to climb the corporate ladder, and also wanting to be a mom and not have to ask for permission to leave my desk to pick up my kids from school. That’s one of my highest values – that’s why my company is called Fierce Mom.

Why am I telling you all of this?

Because as you grow and figure out who you are, you might see that you’re not on the same path as your parents, friends, community members or anyone else who you may have followed or admired as a child. People you have looked up to before, may have inadvertently fallen from their pedestals that you’ve put them on. Not necessarily for anything negative or wrong, but you as a person are growing, you are changing as you come into your own. You are going to form your own opinions based on your own feelings and experiences, and sometimes, you learn that you’re no longer aligned with the beliefs you grew up with. Give yourself permission to explore that. Give yourself the autonomy to be you in a world where others want to have influence over you. Be your own cheerleader. Not to say that you need to eliminate others from your life or have conflicts with people that aren’t aligned with you. There is a lot of good that comes in knowing how others think and work and in what they value. The point is, that you can be you in any situation, and when you act and grow and pursue a life that is yours based on your true values and purpose – you’ll find ultimate happiness, fulfilment, and success. It’s hard to break the mould. Coming out, claiming your identity, “doing you”. There will be a lot of opposition and discomfort. But on the other side of that is freedom and joy. On the other side is where you find your truth and your tribe. The people that are just like you, that want the same things, that have similar goals and ideals and beliefs. When you find your community, you will feel safe and fulfilled. I always knew who I really was, but my need to keep up with the rest, my need to make my parents and family proud, my obligations to my community, and the ideals of what I should do all made me blurry. I feared stepping out and putting my stake in the ground. Not until I was in my late 30’s and deep in debt, depression, anxiety, divorce and feeling like my life was imploding did I finally start to listen to my heart. I went against the traditional expectations I was supposed to live, and found my purpose. I did a lot of work, a lot of digging and a lot of discovery. It came to this – I am a great mom, an entrepreneur and a leader. I am fierce and fearless. And I now live my life in alignment with those values. Confidently shouting it from the rooftops and not concerning myself with what others have to say about it has given me freedom and absolute joy (among the hard times it’s taken to get me here and the hard work it takes to stay here – this isn’t always Disneyland, there is always a cost, but the cost to me is worth it).

I challenge you to do some personal digging. Who are you really? Maybe you are the person that loves academia, you’re an insatiable learner, a teacher, a worker, a free spirit. Whoever you decide you are, be that person. Prove it to yourself and show up for yourself every day. Do the things that align with your purpose. Do the work that you’re called to do, and train and learn and practice to be better at that. Find your career and then learn how to do it. It sounds backwards because we’ve been conditioned to learn first, then get the job – but what if you’re like me and do all that learning and then hate the job?

Scared? I was too. Be brave in your purpose and give yourself permission to seek out your true happiness. The only way to do that is to truly just be you. Unapologetically, enthusiastically, respectfully, confidently… you!

The Superpower Project EQ: The Next Generation

Blaise Hunter | Human Rights Consultant | Heroine

Our future is solely dependent on

how we deal with our past and present. We must be their hero…

The greatest hope every parent has for their children is for them to be happy, healthy, resilient, and good citizens. We also fear the insurmountable challenges they will face. How do we set the next generation up for an optimistic future? We must be the change we wish to see in them. We have anti-bullying campaigns, mental health messaging, and endless support programs yet our youth are continually battling anxiety, depression, and a lack of purpose. What is the remedy?

The Superpower Project is about highlighting various challenges or “kryptonites” facing people and helping us neutralize their effect on us. A deadly kyrptonite facing us these days is parents are battling the exact same things as the kids. How can we lead them on a better path if we their guides cannot do it for ourselves? If we really want to change the world, let's raise a generation equipped for self-regulation, self-reflection, empowerment, and empathy. We do this by picking up the mantle of accountability within our own lives. When we can pause, reflect, and direct ourselves, we will provoke our lineage to do the same. When you see an emotionally intelligent youth or young adult, you find a parent or caregiver who made a courageous move. They decided to turn the mirror on themselves and reflect instead of deflect. EQ in the next generation will be about making

not one, but many valiant decisions. There are crucial choices for us to cause a positive effect for our children. If we can step into the portal of bravery and contemplate on who we are today and the why, we will transform our next generation’s tomorrow. By doing this, powerful implications will take place in us and in them.

• Vulnerability becomes the goal • EQ = Strength • Resilience by outlasting the resistance • Empathy trumps Ego • Clarity to focus on present and future priorities • Gratitude for what we have

• Understanding different perspectives yet holding a strong grounding in values • Developing and using a resolute moral compass • Acquiring a deep sense of self • Realizing our unique identity and stepping into our purpose

The responsibility of each generation is not to please their predecessors. It’s to improve things for their offspring Adam Grant

By parents taking steps to personally grow, they strengthen their inner world which triggers a powerful outer world for their young. We don’t need more programs; we need more emotionally intelligent parents. This is how we hep the next generation. Emotional intelligence is the wave of the future. It has the capability to resolve conflicts, end wars, provoke peace, build bridges, disrupt chaos, heal relationships, and lead us into a new world.

So why aren’t we all flocking towards achieving EQ? Simply put, it’s messy and hard. We often hear how millennials don’t have the work ethic like their parents or grandparents. There’s a disconnect from the balance between work hard and play hard. Various generations swing the pendulum to the extremes, but we require an equilibrium of the two. Kids don’t put the effort in because they don’t see their parents working on themselves. The linchpin to this balance is parents from all genres be willing to get in the trenches and fight for their own EQ. Modelling that kind of grit and willingness to be the change will have a powerful cause and effect around the world. I see it in my own daughter. The more work I do on myself, the more she positively transforms. It truly takes on the butterfly effect. Where minor changes in the now can lead to immense variations in the future. By me doing the work now, I ensure a better pathway for my daughter tomorrow.

I say this and everyone will nod and agree but not many will do much about it after they flip the page. The million-dollar question is how to get parents to realize the urgency of this? We need more people to sound the alarm. We need to debunk how terrifying self-work is. Yes, it is hard, but all my wounds, traumas, and flaws haven’t been that scary. And once I worked through them, they no longer had power over me. We supress those things and shove them deep down because the very thought of exposing them sends us into panic mode. But if we never deal with them, we relive all those nasty things over and over like a broken record. The initial pulling off the bandage stings but then it’s done. There is no more repetitive torture. We stop the toxicity pattern and play a new song. If we can teach our children how to navigate through the challenges of life, we will fashion a gallant generation. Our own demonstration of

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responsibility will promote buy-in from our children. Don’t wait for tomorrow, begin the shift today. Decide to be the best version of yourself. Start with an internal dialogue, face the mirror, and do the work:

1. Write down your weaknesses or things you want to work on 2. Name your strengths 3. List the people you have conflict with 4. Ask yourself if you are happy 5. Reflect on what would it take to be happier and at ease

6. Sit in silence and write down where your body is feeling dis-ease or illness 7. Talk to a counsellor or someone you trust and be vulnerable

8. Take off the masks of perfection and show your kids how to work through being human 9. Do an inventory of what your dreams or goals are and refuse mediocrity 10. Push through the fear daily

If we allow fear to paralyze our personal growth, we cripple the next generation. We have not a moment to lose. Our very future depends on our choices today. Leadership isn’t a title parents carry, it’s an honour bestowed to the ones brave enough to bare their souls. When we solve our present problems, we blaze a trail for profound answers tomorrow. Individual EQ is our legacy for the next generation. We are in a relay of life, and it is our mandate to pass the baton down to our young. The baton isn’t head knowledge; it’s heart wisdom. If we don’t secure EQ for ourselves, we drop the baton. Safeguard the race for generations to come. We are the keepers of the anecdote.

For more information about the Heroine Movement visit www.blaisehunter.com