WOMEN OF STRENGTH ISSUE Celebrating Women of all Shades, Shapes and Sizes
COMPLEXD | 1
EDITOR’S
LETTER
This issue is dedicated to my ultimate woman of strength, my great grandmother Catherine ‘Dede’ Ventour, aged 103. ‘A strong woman works out every day to keep her body in shape... but a woman of strength builds relationships to keep her soul in shape. A strong woman isn’t afraid of anything ... but a woman of strength shows courage in the midst of her fear. A strong woman won’t let anyone get the best of her... but a woman of strength gives the best of herself to everyone. A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future... a woman of strength realizes life’s mistakes can also be unexpected blessings and capitalizes on them. A strong woman wears the look of confidence on her face... but a woman of strength wears grace. A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey... but a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong’ Author Unknown
Kered Clement Editor-in-Chief
4 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 5
CONTEN WOMEN OF STRENGTH ISSUE
8 COMPLEXD BEAUTY Heroic Beauty
COMPLEXD FEATURES A Strong Voice
12
42
COMPLEXD PROFILES Women of Strength
COMPLEXD FEATURES Cultural Cruelty
20
48
COVER STORY Woman of Strength Kim Simplis-Barrow 6 | COMPLEXD
34
COMPLEXD FASHION B [be:]
NTS 64 COMPLEXD MEN Adrian Fisk
Editor-in-Chief Kered Clement Sub Editor Darcel de Vlugt Creative Director Rachel Irwin House Photographer Frederique Rapier www.frederiquerapier.com
78 COMPLEXD TRAVEL + LIFESTYLE A Travellers Truth
Cover Kim Simplis Barrow photographed by Lebawit Lily Girma www.lebawitgirma.com
106 COMPLEXD TRAVEL + LIFESTYLE Relax
COMPLEXD | 7
COMPLEXDBEAUTY
HEROIC BEAUTY
City Girl Beauty Project, an initiative by New York-based makeup artist Andrea D Charles, is a non-profit organization comprised of professional women in the beauty and entertainment industries who are dedicated to making a difference.
I was born and raised on a country farm in Grenada where the main mode of transportation was a donkey. My childhood was so far removed from the beauty industry, but I always remember as a little girl rummaging in my mum’s pocket book and painting her makeup onto my sister’s face. I moved to the US in the late 90s, where I studied cosmetology and I am now a makeup artist based in New York. My self esteem grows every time I make someone feel beautiful. Seeing them smile is worth more than any gift I could receive, which is why my job is so fulfilling. It is also one of the reasons why I set up City Girl Beauty Project (CGBP). Makeup artists and people in the beauty industry are just as socially conscious; after meeting a couple of women with the same sentiments, I started to organise beauty-themed events that gave back to causes related to women and children. At our events, where large groups of women gather together, I always meet someone who has experienced a tragic event in their lives. I went through a tough time when I lost my dad and when a dear friend of mine died of AIDS. The most difficult story I heard was of a woman who was sexually abused by her father who was a headmaster at the school she attended. That is why women honoured and supported by CGBP, including those living with HIV/AIDS, survivors of domestic violence and victims of sexual abuse. In May, we will be hosting our first annual Giving Is Glamorous charity benefit, which will honour a woman who has survived domestic violence or sexual abuse and has done something to help other women still trapped in a similar situation. Our events are all about beauty and empowering women but ultimately, seeing a woman turn a tragic event into a positive one gives me hope. www.givingisglamorous.org 8 | COMPLEXD
City Girl Beauty Project aims to inspire, encourage, support and acknowledge heroism amongst women worldwide.
Portrait by Michael Rowe www.michaelrowephotography.com COMPLEXD | 9
GIVING IS GL
10 | COMPLEXD
LAMOU ROUS
COMPLEXD | 11
12 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD PROFILES
WOMEN OF STRENGTH Photographed by Frederique Rapier
COMPLEXD | 13
Lynn Crilly Strength for my Daughter
When one of my beautiful daughters was diagnosed with anorexia at the age of 12, I found it difficult to find the right help and treatment. My initial reaction was to blame myself, but I trained myself to treat her with the help of my wonderful GP. When my daughter made a full recovery, a friend suggested I become a counsellor to support other sufferers and their families. Now I am an alternative therapist who counsels people suffering with eating disorders and depression. I have worked with many different families and I strongly believe parents are the ones who can help and support their child to recovery. Our family worked together and put all our love, hope and energy into supporting my daughter. There were many challenges; my daughters are twins, so I had to consider how it affected the both of them. When I needed to let off steam, there were people I could talk to who helped me stay on track. Sometimes it was relentless but giving up was not an option. There was never a time in my head when I thought she wouldn’t recover; it was just a case of waiting for that faithful day. The day came when I saw a change in my daughter’s eyes; it was as if she was revived. There was still a long way to go but from that point on, the determination to recover wasn’t just ours, it was hers as well. There are many misconceptions about eating disorders, one being that the parents are at fault and too close to the situation to be able to help. But I believe that with the right guidance they can be the solution. After one of my clients expressed interest in a book of knowledge it stimulated the idea for my book Hope With Eating Disorders. The book is aimed at the carer of a person with an eating disorder, the people that often get forgotten but who are suffering just as much. Every case study in the book is from a recovered sufferer’s point of view, or a carer who has helped someone to recover. The book is written with experience, love, hope and knowledge, and is giving the message that full recovery is possible. It has been a demanding experience but I am continuously showered with strength from my husband, my beautiful daughters, friends and my clients. www.lynncrilly.co.uk 14 | COMPLEXD
‘I saw a change in my daughter’s eyes; it was as if she was revived’
COMPLEXD | 15
‘We couldn’t be kids because we were busy raising ourselves’
Lucille Murray Strength for my Family
I come from a dysfunctional family so I was adopted and raised by my grandmother. My sister and I wanted to give my mother another shot but suffered abuse and violence when we were in her environment because of my stepfather. She eventually turned to drugs and it was a downward spiral from then on. We lost everything: our house, cars and sadly our sense of family. I am now 21 and I had my first son when I 19 years old. I had to drop out of school because I was not being supported by my son’s father who was more interested in the streets, drugs, partying, and other girls. My second son is only one-yearold and although it’s hard being a single mother, I do my best for my sons. I have endured so much, but being a mother is such a beautiful experience. Because of my chaotic family, my younger sister had a nervous breakdown, so I filed for custody of her. It was a decision I had to think long and hard about because I was pregnant with my one year old to support. When she came to live with me it was the most testing time of my life. She was very fragile and broken and I had to be a mother to her and my boys. I struggled at first because I never had anyone to set examples for me. I had to seek guidance from many different people so that I could create a stable environment where she could learn and grow. We are now one big happy family with our highs and lows, my sister helps me around the house and my sons love her enormously. I did have to grow up extremely fast and missed out on so much because my family was so selfish. We couldn’t be kids because we were busy raising ourselves. I try to be the best mother I can be because all children need a positive person to guide them. I give all my honour, glory and praise to God because He has been a constant strength in my life. If I could change anything about my past I wouldn’t because the life I live and the things I’ve been through made me who I am today. If I could give any advice to young single mothers, I would tell them to finish school and dream big. Most importantly, put God first because a family that prays together stays together. Photography by Alexis Calhoun www.alcaphotography.cleanfolio.com/ 16 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 17
Roberta Whitney
Strength from my Upbringing I grew up in South Africa at the time of Apartheid. Blacks and Whites were segregated so we lived in an all-black area. I was and still am a proud black woman but I was teased amongst my black peers due to my light complexion and witnessed my family being disregarded by White South Africans while I was accepted. I never grew up feeling confused because my mother did a great job at instilling self-belief, but there were challenging times. I was not allowed to play outside with the other children in the area because they would beat me up and call me names. Being isolated led to my lack of confidence; I never thought then that I would forge a successful career in modelling. I started modelling as a baby and went on to become a finalist at a Miss Johannesburg beauty contest. I was a favourite to win but they needed me to be white. My supporters fluttered around and begged me to pretend but I refused. They could not understand why but I didn’t want to win with a lie; more importantly I didn’t want to pretend to be something I wasn’t. I accept and love myself, despite a violent and abusive childhood and despite being alienated, teased and bullied for not being dark enough. My father drank a lot and would become physically abusive towards all of us and it made it very difficult for me to trust a man as a young woman. I have had no positive role models in terms of relationships so endured a lot of emotional pain and heartbreak trying to connect with a lover. In the end I had to teach myself how to have a healthy relationship. I am now an entrepreneur, I still model and I have a beautiful 17-year-old daughter. My daughter means the world to me; she is my motivation and my strength. She is confident and talented musically and everything I wish I could be. Motherhood is challenging and being a single mother is even more so, but when your child learns and grows from what you have taught them it’s the most satisfying feeling. My mother and my daughter give me inner strength because they give me the ability to love unconditionally. www.robertawhitney.worldventures.biz 18 | COMPLEXD
‘I accept and love myself, despite being alienated, teased and bullied for not being dark enough’
Photographed by Frederique Rapier COMPLEXD | 19
‘I lost my hair but I will not try to cover it up, as proof that cancer is an unfortunate fact of life to be struggled against and not to be ashamed of ’
20 | COMPLEXD
COVERSTORY
WOMAN OF
STRENGTH
Interview by Kered clement Photographed by Lebawit Lily Girma
On the 7th October, the First Lady of Belize delivered a speech at a cancer information session. She told her listeners that cancer does not discriminate and can affect young, old, black, white, rich or poor. On the 7th November 2011, she was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer in the lymph nodes and sternum and she is currently undergoing her 5th stage of chemotherapy. Her courage and honesty in dealing with her diagnosis is truly honourable and epitomizes the definition of a woman of strength.
COMPLEXD | 21
22 | COMPLEXD
After being diagnosed with breast cancer my first thought was - why? I exercise with a trainer every day; I eat healthy and always made sure I had a well-balanced diet; I drink 8 to10 litres of water every day and I am one of those people who turn down a burger for a salad! And lastly, I’m 39 years old and technically not due for a mammogram until 40. Statistics show that one in eight women are diagnosed with breast cancer and I never thought I would be that one. I guess you never think it’s going to be you. When I was told I thought that I was going to die. That fleeting moment gave me more terror than the cancer itself. That moment felt like an eternity which threatened to steal my future and my life. But I told myself repeatedly, many battles are won or lost with cancer because of the presence or absence of one small word: Hope! Ever since that moment of despair, hope has been my watchword because the love of my family, friends and my countrymen and women, has filled me with hope. I grew up in the town of Santa Elena - in the very lush, green district of Cayo in western Belize. Cayo is home to some of the most beautiful villages and rural areas in the country – with rivers, rainforest, waterfalls, open air markets and a real rustic feel to it. It also boasts Xunantunich, one of the most spectacular Mayan sites of Belize. I come from a very simple and humble background, my dad was a police inspector and my mum was a housewife. My family was large and my parents didn’t have much materially. But I don’t think I could have been raised in a better environment. I had a free and easy childhood and although we just got by financially, I felt like I had everything: loving parents, siblings, a home, a great community and the great outdoors. I learned very early on that happiness for a child really doesn’t come from material things. It comes from love and support in the home, a nice community and a solid foundation through education. Knowing all of this made me calm down and reflect after my diagnosis. I’m looking at it as a pause in my life now, a time to count my blessings and share them with my own family: my 6-year-old daughter Salima and my husband Dean. Being there for Salima’s special moments motivates me - reading her report cards, picking her up from school or taking her on play dates. I think about getting well and staying strong so that one day I can attend her graduation from high school and university, screen her boyfriends and console her when her heart gets broken. There is so much to live for where she is concerned. Then there’s my husband, Dean - I think about us finally being able to do things we haven’t had the chance to, like travelling together and spending pressure-free time with each other. I met Dean at the wedding of my cousin, on January 2, 1999. Dean’s law partner introduced us and he was already a very successful and prominent attorney, but had also been in Government as Minister of Foreign Affairs, Minister of Immigration and Deputy Prime Minister. That night we had a very interesting and engaging conversation, but we didn’t begin dating seriously until a while after. It really took us years to get to where we are today—married and with a child because I went away to study during our relationship. It was important for me to do so as I needed to establish my own identity before committing to a relationship, especially with someone who was such a public figure. I went away to study International Business and Hospital Management. I knew I wanted to help in the growth of the tourism sector in Belize, and I wanted to be sure I could handle the financial management side of the industry. Belize is a beautiful country with so much to offer, whenever I’d go overseas and people asked me where I’m from they would look puzzled when I responded because they had no idea where Belize was. I became determined to help put Belize on the tourism map and showcase the country’s assets and its people. We have such a rich culture, from our people to our foods, traditions and rituals; we are the most diverse in Central America who live harmoniously in the rich natural environment we’ve been blessed. – COMPLEXD | 23
24 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 25
26 | COMPLEXD
When I acquired the First Lady title the most important thing for me was to make a difference, especially in the lives of children with disabilities, living in orphanages, or afflicted with an illness. I wanted to give them hope, let them know that they can still get educated and change their world. I take my advocacy role very seriously and my mission with regards to children’s welfare is constant, which is why I set up The Lifeline Foundation in 2004. I truly believe that each child deserves the opportunity to realize his or her full potential. Some children are lucky to have parents or guardians who have the resources and the will to help them, but there are far more who, because of disability, poverty or lack of parental guidance, need the help of the community or established organizations to propel them towards the success and happiness they deserve. Too often, we as a society look to Government agencies and departments to solve the problems affecting our families and in particular our children, when, in reality, we need to take responsibility for the well being of our most vulnerable citizens - our children. The idea that our children are the future of our nation is not a cliché, which is why our organization calls upon our citizens to donate resources, volunteer and actively engage in the business of helping children. Since its establishment we have raised over $600,000.00, all of which has gone directly to schools and other organizations actively involved in improving the lives of the children of Belize. My role as an advocate has always been to bring attention to fundamental issues affecting women and children. I have hosted a commercial sexual exploitation symposium, lobbied for the signing of the convention on the rights of people with disabilities and campaigned to reduce stigma and discrimination against children in child care institutions. I collaborated with the Belize Cancer Society, Karl Heusner Memorial Hospital and Ministry of Health for a children’s intensive care unit and secured funding to assist with a large scale pap smear campaigns in Belize City which targeted over 500 women. I was already planning to hold a ‘Let’s Talk Cancer’ forum and a fundraiser next year for children who have cancer with the President of the Belize Cancer Society. Many children have to travel across the border to Merida, Mexico to access treatment and that takes a toll on their family - both financially and emotionally. When I got my diagnosis, I was momentarily overwhelmed and saw my life and all my plans coming to a sudden halt. I was doing so much and was so active in the community and just couldn’t believe this was happening to me. As a First Lady, I believe I have a huge responsibility to my country and as an individual I believe in sharing knowledge so I decided not to conceal my diagnosis. How could I be a part of a public anti-cancer campaign, if I insisted on keeping my own struggle with the disease private? I look at my diagnosis as a way to focus attention on the importance of Belizean women getting regular breast exams and mammograms and to make a point that breast cancer can affect just about any woman, and to engage the country in raising funds to fight this disease. Through my treatments, I have learned that there are important messages to pass on and I feel like it is my duty to be as transparent as possible. Yes it’s a personal health issue, but it’s bigger than me. There are women in my country that could be influenced positively from sharing my experience, so almost immediately after my diagnosis; there was no doubt in my mind about making it public. The last few months have been a whirlwind of emotions, information, travel and treatment, but I keep the words faith, hope and love etched in my mind. I won’t pretend that it has been an easy experience for me because it has not! I have spent many days ill in bed from the effects of chemotherapy, which are worse than cancer. Chemo is all-invasive; it takes over your body and your mind, and forces you to inhabit its world. Even on the not-so-bad days you are conscious of the lingering effects of the bad feeling, the listlessness, numbness of your skin, the awful taste in your mouth, the fatigue and the sense of being overwhelmed. People often ask me whether I am in pain or nauseous, and to be quite blunt there is isn’t a nicer way to put it than feeling like someone is stabbing you in the stomach, and trying to pull your throat out by reaching in through your mouth. Sometimes my strength is stolen by a feeling of exhaustion that affects me mentally and physically. The mental effect which is often referred to as ‘chemo brain’ causes me to forget a word mid sentence or someone’s name. I suffer from headaches and my immune system is compromised so much that I have to be vigilant about who I come in contact with and what I eat. And, of course, there has been the most visible side effect which is the loss of my hair. The oncologist told me from the start – COMPLEXD | 27
‘I think about getting well and staying strong so that one day I can attend her graduation from high school and university, screen her boyfriends and console her when her heart gets broken’
my hair would fall out so I started preparing myself from my first chemotherapy session. When my hair started coming out in clumps I decided that I was going to lose it on my own terms and made a day out of visiting the hairdresser with my friend. I also decided early on that I would not try to cover it up, as proof that cancer is an unfortunate fact of life to be struggled against and not to be ashamed of. Every time I go to a chemotherapy session I know it will bring on another wave of side-effects. But with each session, I know that I am one step closer to being healthy. I learnt very early on to focus on what chemo, surgery and radiation will do for me, instead what it will do to me. This has made a huge difference and helps me cope with the disease. The one thing I have learnt is that it is important to take responsibility for your health and make it a priority in your life. Conducting your own manual breast exams on a monthly basis should become second nature to women and gaining knowledge about breast cancer is paramount. If you discover a lump, don’t be afraid or hesitate – you must seek medical attention immediately. That was how it happened with me and that was certainly how I was able to begin treatment before the cancer could spread to other organs. A lot of people have asked me how I am coping and how I stay strong. I’m a spiritual person and faith is foremost in keeping me focused and hopeful during this time. But I have to be strong for my daughter, who is at a delicate age. My family has been extremely supportive; my husband accompanies me on all my treatments; my daughter Salima has been so encouraging and at times she is a lot stronger than me, which I find unbelievable for her age, and my mother lives far away but makes the trip to see me on every chemo session. It has made me realize how precious it is to have the kind of support I do from my mother and siblings through to my extended family and friends. And then I think about how amazing my Belizean people are with the special mass they held for me, I value their constant prayers and continuing outpouring of love and compassion because it keeps me strong. My battle plan each day is therefore to unwaveringly take every next step along the road to recovery; to always move forward and force cancer’s retreat. I think all the time of the other life-affirmers out there, and say particularly to those in Belize that we must draw comfort from the fact that this is a struggle of millions and none of us is alone. Photographed by Lebawit Lily Girma www.lebawitgirma.com 28 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 29
‘I look at my diagnosis as a way to focus attention on the importance of Belizean women getting regular breast exams and mammograms and to make a point that breast cancer can affect just about any woman’
30 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 31
AL OC EL H T
ENT NM ER V GO
IT BUT REE F N IO CAT EDU KE A M TO NTS WA
G. DIN UN F HE VE T T HA ’ N S DOE
TO END P O FIND O VERT UT M Y W E OR E A NEED TO T CH G RIST IANA
32 | COMPLEXD
Christian Aid is a company limi charity number XR94639. Com
GET TO THE ROOTS OF THE PROBLEM AID.OR G.UK/ POVE RTYOVER
COMPLEXD | 33
ited by guarantee, registered in England and Wales. Registered office 35 Lower Marsh, London, SE1 7RL. UK registered charity number 1105851. Company number 5171525. Scotland charity number SC039150. Northern Ireland mpany number NI059154. Republic of Ireland charity number CHY 6998. Company number 426928. The Christian Aid name and logo are trademarks of Christian Aid; Poverty Over is a trademark of Christian Aid Š March 2011.
34 | COMPLEXD
C O M P L E X D FEATURES
A Strong Voice
Alternative Soul Artist, Cultural Ambassador and Activist Yewande Austin has started a global initiative that uses music to foster education, sustainable development and AIDS prevention. From M.T.V. to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Yewande’s music has taken center stage with the likes of the Black Eyed Peas, Maroon 5 and India Arie, but it is her work as an award-winning lecturer and passionate social activist that has become her greatest joy. Here she shares her story and dedication to uncovering the connection between music and socio-economic transformation.
COMPLEXD | 35
‘Even as an educated, accomplished woman, I am often reminded of Etta James singing, ‘This is a man’s world’ From the age of 7, my mother was encouraging me to study piano. She would drag me to every music theatre production, opera, visual art exhibit and museum that she could. I didn’t always appreciate those experiences, but somewhere along the way I developed a really profound connection to music. Throughout my adolescence, I was the kid that socially never fit in and I suffered silently growing up with a father who was in and out of my life, so music became my best friend, my confidante, an outlet to express myself when I didn’t have the words to do so. I was consumed with writing poems and songs, and by the age of 9 years I was charging an entry fee for my ‘Michael Jackson’ review concerts in my grandmother’s basement. As I developed my musical knowledge, I realised how creative expression could affect social change and that music had the potential to change the world. I became very passionate about the concept of using music to change lives because music has been used to empower disenfranchised communities since the beginning of time. Throughout the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade, enslaved Africans used the Negro Spiritual to preserve their faith and plan their escape to freedom along the Underground Railroad in America. Even after slavery was abolished in this country, Blues music served as an outlet for newly freed slaves to express their socio-political beliefs in a society that didn’t publicly acknowledge their intellect. Later in history, musical forms like Rock and Hip-Hop restored balance to those 36 | COMPLEXD
Photographed by Isaiah C. Harold www.wix.com/isaiah_harold/atelier who didn’t fit society’s standards and yet brought people of all backgrounds together during another important transition in American history. Unfortunately we live in a world that is built upon social stratification through race, colour, religion, gender, class and sexual orientation. No matter where you go in the world, groups of people have been oppressed because they were “different”. From the time I got my break in the industry I can list many accomplishments stemming from my debut EP “Evolution” (Lotus Records, 2005), live concert tours in the UK, performing on BET and MTV Base, opening for everyone from the Black Eyed Peas to Maroon 5, but I came up against a lot of challenges being an African-American woman who wrote and sang what I call Alternative Soul music – a mix of Soul, Rock, Pop. I just didn’t want to sing the same R&B/ Soul music that everyone else was writing. And I detested the pressure from executives to be yet another black female singer that had to perform “bump and grind” songs and – COMPLEXD | 37
Photograph by Derek Blanks 38 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 39
‘I understood what the girls in our programs have endured. But knowing how much they depended on me to be their voice was enough to make me complete my mission’ bend over in my music videos to be successful. I wanted to write songs that would inspire all of my listeners. Most of the time it felt like the closer I was getting to my dream in the music industry, the more I was asked to compromise myself artistically, spiritually, and most definitely when it came to negotiating business. So I ran as far away from the industry as I could to commit my life to lecturing and producing humanitarian programs in the developing world. Most recently I finished a Masters in Ethnomusicology (World Music Studies) at the University of Sheffield in the United Kingdom to expand my understanding of the relationship between music and social change. This was the life I was preparing myself for, because in my mind, being successful in the industry meant that I would have to sacrifice the things that I valued most about myself and I just wasn’t willing to do it. But music was never far from my heart and I was enthused when Chris Elliott launched Phoenix Records in 2010 and embraced my alternative musicality and really encouraged me to just be me! It was self-written and produced by me with additional production provided by guitarist Marc Baldwin and named “Rebirth” (the translation for my Yoruba birth name). I was fulfilling my goals musically but I still dreamt of changing the world through music. When I tried to make this dream a reality, I learnt that the challenges I experienced as a woman were not limited to the entertainment industry. Even as an educated, accomplished woman, I am often reminded of Etta James singing, ‘This is a man’s world’. When I go into African villages the men don’t see me as an ambassador but a woman that’s a potential bride. When I meet with prospective sponsors or business partners in the entertainment industry, I’m offered dinner dates and trips abroad before contracts are even discussed. On one of my last trips to Africa, an ambassador who had a great deal of influence in that country invited me to go back to his hotel room at a conference where I’d been asked to speak about my research on music as an alternative tool for socio-economic development. Right smack dab in the middle of one of the most prestigious opportunities that I’d ever been given, I was 40 | COMPLEXD
expected to barter myself in exchange for introductions to influential people that could most definitely facilitate my mission. Needless to say, I removed myself from that situation and proceeded to go back to my room and bawl my eyes out. It was incomprehensible to me that as an advocate, activist, award-winning lecturer and motivational speaker, I had simply been reduced to a body that this man thought could be used for his own pleasure. In those moments I understood on some level what the girls in our programs have endured, but knowing how much they depended on me to be their voice was enough to make me get my act together and complete my mission. Before that trip was over my work had produced partnerships in 13 more African nations, so fortunately I didn’t let that man’s perception of how I should conduct business as a woman impact my ability to be successful. But it’s an ongoing battle that I’m willing to fight, because in the words of poet Maya Angelou, “I’m a phenomenal woman, phenomenally.” As a teenager, my mother engrained the concept of charity in me; it was very important to her. I’ll never forget the time I helped feeding the homeless during the Christmas season. Seeing adults standing in line to get a warm meal was already foreign to me but witnessing children and teenagers my own age was even more heartbreaking. Although we didn’t always have a lot during my childhood, growing up in the suburbs of Maryland shielded me from life in the inner city streets. I was initially distraught by the experience, but seeing the smiles on their faces when I served their plates was life changing. In 2006, I was invited to headline the Malawi Lake of Stars Music Festival in Africa. When I learned that the event would benefit local AIDS orphans I offered to spend some time teaching them about music, history and AIDS prevention in the local villages of Chintheche. Most of the children, orphaned by the death of one and sometimes both parents, had survived atrocities that most of us could never imagine. Some children had been removed from homes where they were forced to give up their education to care for their siblings, while others were rescued from trafficking where they sold their fragile bodies to survive. However, day after day I began to witness an amazing transformation. Once sad and withdrawn, these children were becoming vibrant, confident and begged to learn more. In those moments, my humanitarian organization, the Change Rocks Foundation was born. Our mission is simply to use music as an alternative tool to promote education, leadership and sustainable skill development for vulnerable children around the world. To date, we have produced programs in Malawi, Tanzania, Botswana, Namibia, South Africa, Dominican Republic and the U. S. Virgin Islands (St. Thomas and St. Croix). My mother has been the greatest influence my life. Perhaps one of the greatest lessons she ever taught me is not be a victim of circumstance but to use those experiences to be wiser, stronger, faster, and greater. There is no doubt that my strength and talents come from a higher power, but I’ve also been deeply inspired by the people that trust me with their dreams every day. The children that have been discarded by society but whose smiles and commitment to my humanitarian programs give me the energy to accomplish the unimaginable (often on 3 hours of sleep); the students on college campuses who’ve been bullied because they were different and the ones that have confided with me about suicidal thoughts caused by poor self-esteem or conflict over their sexual orientation. Some people go their entire lives never claiming the blessings that have been designed uniquely for them. It’s my mission to help every man, woman and child whether through my music, lectures or social justice programs, change is truly life’s work and I’m just grateful that God gave me the tools to make those dreams a reality. www.yewande.com www.changerocksfoundation.com Photographed by Derek Blanks
COMPLEXD | 41
‘It has come to the point where having a boy in a family is considered to be a benefit and having a girl is a burden’
Cultural Cruelty Shruti Bedi asks, what happens if a cruel act against the female gender is accepted by a culture or a country? Abortion is highly controversial in today’s society. However, in certain parts of India, sex-select abortions are becoming more common among affluent families. Sex discrimination and foeticide go a long way back in India’s past which includes the horrific act of killing girl babies after they are born. The practice has become more discreet and underground because sexselect abortions are being asked for by families that can afford to go through the process in unregistered ultrasound clinics all over the sub-continent. Due to access to technology, some wealthier families use ultrasound results to check if a woman is pregnant with a girl while some poorer families ask for sex-select abortions because they cannot afford to raise a female child. There have been all kinds of excuses for sex-select abortions. In poor villages, these range from farmers saying they can’t afford hired help so they need more males in the family, to complaining about the cost to get their daughters married and dowry requirements haunting their minds. It has come to the point where having a boy in a family is considered to be a benefit and having a girl is a burden. Some families justify the act by saying it is out of worrying for the future of the girl child and how she will be treated by her in-laws while others worry about fickle things like lineage. The general senses I get from speaking to Indian men is that having a boy is seen as a sign of honour, pride and status. Because of all these reasons, eradicating a girl baby is not seen as cruel or wrong and the few who speak up against the atrocities faced by girls are silenced by century-old traditions and customs. – 42 | COMPLEXD
Photographs by Adrian Fisk www.adrianfisk.com
COMPLEXD | 43
44 | COMPLEXD
‘I respect and treat the women I meet as an equal. This 19-year-old girl I photographed had her face lacerated by her kidnappers because of insufficient dowry. She was very beautiful, vulnerable and incredibly strong. She is the bravest girl I’ve have ever met!’- Adrian Fisk
I was born and brought up in India; by the time I had entered my adolescence, I had moved to the UK with my family. Perhaps, if I had still been living in India, I might not have been disturbed by the accepted crimes that are committed against the girl child. It was only after experiencing my first real dose of freedom and equality that I became aware of the differences between British and the Indian cultures. I understood that women are as integral, intelligent and worthy as men and that inequality has to be fought for at every juncture, no matter how oppressing or daunting it may seem. I asked a few British Asian men their thoughts on the issue and they believed it was wrong to kill female children but that they understood the reasons for doing so. I was unsettled by their response of attributing their actions to religious and cultural dogma. It left me with so many questions about this embedded cultural cruelty that is plaguing my culture. Despite all the progress that India is making as a nation, will the progress help save the girl child or will they continue to serve as a sacrificial lamb; and what good are the advances in science and technology if people in the country remain blinded to the plight of the girl child? The picture is not completely bleak because the Indian government is trying to come up with girl-friendly schemes in parts of the country. In the state of Bihar, Kanya Suraksha Yojna (Girl Protection Scheme) is in full practice. 2,000 Rupees (£27) is invested by the state in the name of a girl, as she grows older, so does the money, which when she is old enough can be used to pay for her education or wedding. These measures, though effective, are still not enough because social attitudes towards women need to be changed. Places in India that have high levels of illiteracy need to be addressed and dowry practice needs to be gotten rid of completely. Some insufficient dowry cases have resulted in the burning of brides and ongoing physical abuse and often these cases are swept under the carpet as ‘freak accidents’. From the moment of conception, a women’s fate is sealed and more often than not, it is a downward spiral. The mainstream, patriarchal culture forces women to pay the unfortunate price of suffering. Those who are fortunate enough to survive birth are still likely to face death due to neglect, abuse, or malnutrition. Women are so brainwashed that many believe they are not equal to men so they fulfil their subservient position in society. From an early age, this view is embedded in their minds and many spend their whole lives believing it to be the truth. They would not dream of raising an objection to the practiced cultural norms for fear of facing backlash. Nevertheless, this does not mean that the situation of women can’t improve. The government needs to play an assertive role, laws that support women’s status in society need to be upheld until the awareness of the injustice faced by women in India is publicized more. Education has not served as a complete answer to gender discrimination because people still believe that women are inferior to men. Female foeticide should be seen as a crime – morally, religiously, and socially. People throughout India, in villages, towns and cities all need to be targeted. Perhaps then, respect for women will arise in our society and baby girls will be gifted with the opportunity to have a future.
COMPLEXD | 45
‘Women are as integral, intelligent and worthy as men and that inequality has to be fought for at every juncture’
46 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 47
COMPLEXD 48 | COMPLEXD
FASHION COMPLEXD | 49
B ALBUM is a yearlong journey through the life of emerging supermodel Basia Szkaluba. The project was developed with complete secrecy between the photographer and model to build a strong level of trust and intimacy. Every month in the year, they meet in the exact same place at a lakeshore, not far from where Basia was brought up. Everything was done spur of the moment - between Basia’s school studies and professional work. There was no hair, make-up, styling and designer rag. The aim was to portray the raw beauty of Basia through the changing seasons. Photographer Tomek Jankowshi conceptualized the project to express a feeling of passing time by creating a unique photographic tale which captures emotions, awareness, surroundings and environment. Model | Basia Szkaluba (IMG Models, New York) Photographer | Tomek Jankowski www.tomekjankowski.net
50 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 51
52 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 53
54 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 55
56 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 57
58 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 59
60 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 61
62 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 63
COMPLEXDMAN
ADRIAN
FISK 64 | COMPLEXD
iSpeak Global is a worldwide project featuring the thoughts of a fraction of the 1.8 billion young people who will become our future. Photographer Adrian Fisk who has already travelled 27,000 kilometres through China and India aims to capture portraits of young people in 23 countries over 18 months, where each subject is asked to express their concerns by writing anything they want on a piece of paper. Here Adrian speaks about the concept, journey and discoveries he has made in India and china. How did you start your career in photography? I discovered photography on a serious level by accident. At 19, I decided to do voluntary work in Bangladesh with a friend. A huge cyclone hit killing 136,000 people and amidst the chaos we were mistaken for journalists so we just rolled with it. I remember blagging myself onto an old Russian helicopter which was delivering aid. I had my head out the window with the wind in my hair and while photographing all the destruction below I had an epiphany. That’s when I knew that’s what I wanted to do, so I went back to the UK and studied photography. What inspired your latest projects in India and in China? I’ve lived in India for 8 years and I became increasingly aware of how important India and China were to global economy and politics. Statistics show the population of young people ages 30 years and under count for 67% in Indian youth and 45% in China, therefore the young people of these two countries that are going to be the ones that determine the West’s future. The project targets individuals 18-30 because I think that there’s a sense that perhaps things aren’t quite right amongst young people which could be a sign that our obsession with consumerism, materialism and rampant capitalism over the last 30 years is probably not an advantageous way to go ahead. It’s suggested that when you study hard and go to school, then university, your dreams will be realised but now, UK unemployment is at its highest since 1995. If you have a whole generation like that, they’re not just going to be confused; they’re going to be very angry. When you get anger, it ends up on the streets and when it ends up on the street that’s when you get political change. COMPLEXD | 65
‘Why people must to get married’. Meng Hai Lin - 29 years. Mobile phone Engineer. Beijing. 66 | COMPLEXD
‘I want to date somebody and not be frowned upon’ Vibhuti Singh - 22 years. Hindu. New Delhi. Studying Converging Journalism BA(Hons). COMPLEXD | 67
‘The interesting thing about this documentation is when she becomes a mother in-law, will she make her daughter in-law wear the sari?’
Why did you decide to combine photography with words? I thought for a long time how I would communicate this concept; eventually I came up with the idea of getting people to write anything they want on a blank piece of paper. I worked very closely with a translator for obvious reasons. Culturally I didn’t feel like I had to hold myself back but the concept of free expression is a complicated one in China so I would start a dialogue with each individual. The purpose of the conversation was to get them thinking; by the time their brain is buzzing you end up with something very interesting on paper. India is a very patriarchal society, there were times when I wanted to talk to a woman and she had to get her husband’s permission. I always tried to get them in private because the men would keep butting in because it is assumed that the man’s opinion is more important than the woman’s. When you meet someone who is illiterate, you can see what it does to them. They feel embarrassed and humiliated and you can almost read their mind through their expressions. It was a joy to be able to say to those individuals that they could still express themselves and be included in this project. And that is really empowering to them because their voices are just as important as any other person. – 68 | COMPLEXD
Hindi - ‘I do not like wearing the sari’. Sheela - 23 years. Hindu. Gujarat House Maid. COMPLEXD | 69
(Illiterate) ‘My husband and I want to become migrant labourers so we can work hard to make ourselves and our parents happy’. Ma Xiao Lian - 19 years. Farmer. Qinghai Province. 70 | COMPLEXD
Illiterate - ‘Like you, we need the same things in life’ Bharati - 23 years. Muslim. Prostitute - Has one child and is pregnant with another. Bombay. COMPLEXD | 71
‘We are the lost generation. I’m confused about the world’. Avril Lui - 22 years. Post grad student. Guangxi Province. 72 | COMPLEXD
‘Lost and searching between the two worlds’. Parveen Khan - 17 years. Father Muslim / Mother (French) Christian / Lives in Hindu area. Rajastan. Schoolgirl. COMPLEXD | 73
‘Before I die, I want to see a united China. Both united with itself and with the world’. Wendy Zhang - 20 years. Law Student studying in Canada. Great Wall of China. 74 | COMPLEXD
What did you notice about women in India? India is changing fast, I’ve seen profound changes there in the eight years I’ve lived there and I’m talking about the mindset of the people and the young generation. When a young woman in India wrote she hates wearing the sari I was shocked. When I asked her why she wears it, she told me she is forced to wear it by her mother-in-law. She is a maid and her situation is linked to economic status. A middle-class Indian woman, who studies or has parents in professional fields, can make her own decision. As India’s economy strengthens and there is more money floating around, more and more young women will be economically empowered and can make more of their own decisions and choices. If Indian economy continues to strengthen, will we see the same amount of Indian women wearing the sari in 30 years time? Or will we see a big move towards westernisation and westernised dress? The interesting thing about this documentation is when she becomes a mother in-law, will she make her daughter in-law wear the sari? In China, a girl questioned marriage and in India, a girl longed for the freedom to date. I found that women expressed issues relating to relationships and love more than men. It showed that women were more open about topics relating to men, love and relationships. Freedom with relationships in both India and China were a big issue amongst women. If you’re a middle class woman in India it’s really difficult and if you’re lower class it’s near impossible. However, a middle class Indian woman and Chinese woman are going to have quite a lot in common with women in the UK. You plan to travel to 23 more countries, what countries are on the list? Off the top of my head, Jamaica, Russia, Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC), America and Venezuela… the list is based on countries that are politically, culturally, economically, and environmentally relevant to the 21st century with a few mavericks thrown in. I chose DRC because since 1998 5.5 million people died due to starvation and something war related. If you’re a young person growing up in DRC, what does it do to your psyche? It’s so extreme and so removed from the world you and I understand. I am hoping that through what people express in DRC, they can therefore speak for other people who have grown up in conflict. View Adrian’s work and find out about ispeak Global at www.adrianfisk.com
COMPLEXD | 75
COMPLEXDADVERTORIAL
BEAUTIFUL
BELIZE 76 | COMPLEXD
As one of the last unspoiled places on earth, Belize offers travelers an authentic Caribbean and Central American getaway. For generations, the English-speaking people of Belize have been committed to preserving the country’s unique charms, helping to earn its reputation as one of the finest destinations for eco-travel on the planet. With 40-percent of the country under some form of protection, travelers can see nature at its best through a variety of unmatched adventures from north to south. Best known for its serenity and mystique, northern Belize is a place for those dreaming of a “one-on-one” with Mother Nature. The region features some of Belize’s most desired attractions, including the archaeological marvel of Lamanai Maya site, and the splendor found in the lush jungles of the Rio Bravo Conservation Area. The sparsely populated northern towns of Corozal and Orange Walk make northern Belize a great home base for travelers striving to avoid large crowds. Some of the country’s best opportunities for eco-adventure can be found in Central Belize. The region’s most popular town - San Ignacio – is usually the first stop for travelers before spelunking the ATM Cave system, scaling the majestic Xunantunich Maya site, kayaking down the translucent Belize River or exploring a jungle trail through the Mountain Pine
Ridge Reserve. No matter what activity, visitors will find this region to be one of the country’s most versatile playgrounds for tourists. The undiscovered landscape of southern Belize is ideal for those looking to venture off-the-beaten-path and explore Belize’s cultural diversity. Activities like Maya chocolate making, the Maya homestay program and Garifuna drumming ceremonies along the beaches of Placencia, allow travelers to experience Belize’s rich Maya and Garifuna cultures firsthand. The Cockscomb Basin Wildlife Sanctuary is another popular attraction offering enough biodiversity to impress even the most discerned traveler. Finally, those searching for postcard-perfect beaches, enticing warm waters and a laid-back Caribbean style will find the cayes lining Belize’s stunning Barrier Reef, the perfect haven. More than 200 small islands ranging in size and type dot the turquoise waters off Belize’s coast offering a wide variety of popular attractions and activities. From laid-back islands like Caye Caulker, to the lively buzz of Ambergris Caye, visitors are sure to find the vacation that perfectly suites them. For more information, visit www.TravelBelize.org
COMPLEXD | 77
From a young age I was good at maths and interested in the arts. I put my fantasies of becoming a fashion designer aside and graduated with a degree in econometrics. But it was my logical side that helped me understand the technicalities of photography. I enjoy capturing life when I am travelling, which explains why people are the subjects in most of my travel photographs. In my opinion travel images depicting the cultural and social life of people in different countries are beautiful and interesting. But I also travel to see the world through my own eyes and discover the truth. 78 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD T R A V E L + L I F E S T Y L E
COMPLEXD | 79
80 | COMPLEXD
CUBA
COMPLEXD | 81
‘After each kiss to a foreign man they make the sign of the cross to apologise to God for their sins’
Cuba known as the country of passion, sun, mangoes, salsa and hot-tempered people brings it very close to my soul and has been on my hit list for ages. When I arrived and started to photograph local people I learnt that Cuban people get on average 10-25 US dollars per month, while the cost of living is very expensive compared to their salaries. Considering the average is even less for women, many of them resort to tourism which could be anything from wearing colourful dresses with cigars in their mouths to prostitution. Women who choose to pose in popular touristic spots can make good for living, but what the tourists don’t know is that these women must pay a percentage of their earnings to the government or owner of the location they are sitting in - this percentage sometimes amounts to half their earnings. These women are brave and strong, they pose with pride and they are not afraid to shout at stingy tourists. After each kiss to a foreign man they make the sign of the cross to apologise to God for their sins, which showed the lengths they are willing to go to have a better life. –
82 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 83
84 | COMPLEXD
Other women make their money through fortune-telling or renting rooms in their home. I had a chance to meet a women who rents her home and they make a very good living out of it. But the darker side to earning money is much more prevalent, especially in Havana. –
COMPLEXD | 85
86 | COMPLEXD
‘some of the young women involved are well-educated medical students or doctors because a prostitute can earn in a week the equivalent of a doctor’s annual salary paid by the state in pesos’
Sex tourism in Cuba has become big business after the introduction of CUC (equivalent to US Dollars), to the point where it’s run as a family business and practiced by several generations of women. Sex service providers are called ‘jineteras’ and surprisingly some of the young women involved are well-educated medical students or doctors because a prostitute can earn in a week the equivalent of a doctor’s annual salary paid by the state in pesos. A few continue to uphold professional positions during the day and work as prostitutes in the hotels and bars at night. They call themselves ‘Cuban girlfriends’ and usually accompany lonely businessmen on tours of Cuba, escort them to dinner and sleep with them. The practice is widely accepted because the only time a Cuban woman is allowed in a tourist hotel is when she is accompanying a foreign man. For the majority of women, the choice to sell their bodies is out of necessity. None of the women I met were working to support drug habits; they were working to survive and support their families. Their choices come with many consequences as it brings shame on their husbands, fathers and brothers but it is swept under the carpet because it is a substantial part of many families’ incomes. In Cuba, if a woman is unable to provide for her family with the basics she is considered a failure and bad mother or wife. She is left to deal with the guilt and scorn of her society if she cannot provide, but if she chooses to work in the sex industry to find a way to provide, she still has to deal with the guilt and shame of prostitution. Even though it is illegal, the government closes its eyes to prostitution knowing how much money is made from foreigners coming for sex and entertainment. Sex education in Cuba is more progressive and honest than in many other countries. Liberation of female sexuality allows young girls and boys to experiment sexually without social censure - all these things make prostitution look like a normal job. But I often worried about the emotional state of the young women I met. Some of them have grown up in environments where their grandmothers and mothers did the same thing so it has become socially accepted. The only time when women showed remorse was when they had to think of their daughters doing the same thing. The women I met are super strong; they build an iron shield that disregards the disrespect they get in their communities and to cope with doing what they can to survive, but in every photograph when you look deep inside their heart you see a lot of pain that’s hard to conceal. COMPLEXD | 87
88 | COMPLEXD
‘Sex tourism in Cuba has become big business to the point where it’s run as a family business and practiced by several generations of women’ COMPLEXD | 89
‘I witness a tiny old woman easily shepherding a huge beast which follows her silently; her fragile frame was no signifier of her inner strength’
INDONESIA 90 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 91
In Indonesia I had the opportunity to visit very isolated places and experience the traditions of local people. I attended a very shocking and unusual funeral ceremony in Toraja region, Sulawesi Island, Indonesia, famous for elaborate and expensive funeral ceremonies for the noble and rich. A special funeral village is built and all the relatives, family members and friends are invited to celebrate the death, which lasts several days. The most important component of the ritual is the slaughter of a buffalo. The amount of buffalos slaughtered depends on how powerful the person who died was. Hundreds of pigs are also slaughtered and later given as gifts to guests. After the bloody ceremony, a group of boys and girls clap their hands while performing a cheerful dance called Ma’dondan dressed in Torajan traditional costumes. Torajan culture embraces matrilineal system and women are honoured more than men. In funeral ceremonies, the women takes on the role of a servant, but if it was a woman who died more buffalos are scarified for her which is a signifier of a woman’s power and importance. –
92 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 93
94 | COMPLEXD
Market days in the isolated Wakai village are a big deal. It is very easy to sell produce like bananas and vegetables because it is difficult to get fruits in Togean islands. Women trade produce to earn a living but it’s not big business so some women have to do tough work in coconut factories to make more money for their families. –
COMPLEXD | 95
96 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 97
Chewing betel or tobacco leaves is a popular pastime for women, the leaves make them high and happy but it provides protection against tooth decay, intestinal parasites, and bacteria and soothes headaches caused by living high in the mountains. –
98 | COMPLEXD
‘Chewing betel or tobacco leaves is a popular pastime for women; the leaves make them high and happy’ COMPLEXD | 99
100 | COMPLEXD
‘Although their lives are very basic, Bajo women are always happy compared to women in the western world with careers and material possessions’
The nomadic Bajo (where whole families moving often from island to island in search of shelter, food, and companionship) live in houses built over the sea. They’re famous for their aquatic skills and some of them can easily free dive to depths of over 60 feet for minutes at a time. Childbearing and rearing is the main job of the Bajo women and it is their biggest pride and joy. They spend their days cooking and taking care of their children and home. Although their lives are very basic, the women are always happy compared to women in the western world with careers and material possessions. After observing a few of the women and understanding the culture, I realised this was because there was no room for disappointment. From birth, a Bajo women’s fate is sealed and there is no other expectation from a woman of a sea gypsy family so there is not much else left to do but be happy and content. They are always pleasant; they smile, and they do not rush about and stress much. But one reaction stuck out in my mind, when the women met me for the first time they were fixed on my skin colour and would touch it and repeatedly say ‘chantik’ which means beautiful. After a few days I noticed that some women would apply a special lotion to their face to make their skin lighter. Even in a distant corner of the world women are fixated with beauty. Bajo women like to dress up and style their hair and love nothing better than to pose for their pictures. – COMPLEXD | 101
PORTUGAL ‘I have photographed many women who lives weren’t a bed of roses but still I saw the strength in their faces’
102 | COMPLEXD
Portugal was my first out-of-the-ordinary trip in Europe. I read an informative article that said there are many interesting things about the place that have not been explored. But nothing prepared me for the sex industry that was going on behind closed doors. Most of the women working in prostitution are foreigners from Brazil, and other Eastern European countries. It is not illegal in Portugal, but organized prostitution is forbidden. Just as I witnessed in Cuba, it was poorer single-parent women who were struggling to support their families that would engage in consensual sex for money. I photographed a woman twice in the same place, dressed to seduce and readily awaiting business; something I never expected to find in this quite country with a large population of older generations. I have photographed many women whose lives weren’t a bed of roses but still I saw the strength in their faces. It made me reflect a lot on how I would cope if I were in the same position. One thing I can say is despite their difficult circumstances they never complained and always had a smile on their faces. Photography by Ausra Osipaviciute www.aography.com
COMPLEXD | 103
104 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 105
R EL
The Complexd team spends a d convenience and massage.
106 | COMPLEXD
LAX
day relaxing with the pioneers of
COMPLEXD | 107
108 | COMPLEXD
‘You can pop in for a fully-clothed 10-minute chair massage for as little as £14, seven days a week’
COMPLEXD | 109
RELAXATION is an alien concept when you have a young family to support; near impossible when you have a tight deadline to meet and a downright annoying word when something is plaguing your mind and leaves no room for positivity. But whether we like it or not, the art of relaxing may be so crucial to our health, if we don’t take time to revitalise our bodies we may be at risk of bringing on an onslaught of more complicated problems related to health. ‘The globe is stressed - not just the British public but also the world! It has become a very challenging place; it’s only when you actually have a massage that you realise what tension you’re storing in your body’, explains Peter Nunn, Chief Executive of Relax Day Spa in London. If I hadn’t just floated out of an 1 hour long back and Indian head massage that scoped out every single knot in my body and unwound it, I would have nodded in agreement and shrugged off the idea of booking myself in and wasting previous time on - God forbid treating my body! Relax is ‘an assault on the senses’ and an experience which invites you to unwind. Upon entering a modern, tranquil haven in the middle of the bustling city you’re greeted with a friendly smile and confident ‘hello’. Everything about the environment has been well thought out, from the aesthetically pleasing decor, music, smells and complimentary tea. I’ve had my fair share of spa treatments and beauty days so I lay on the massage bed waiting for my therapist to lightly prod my skin and cover me in oils while listening to the sounds of trickling water. But witnessing as much as I could from the opening my face was wedged into, I marvelled at my Cypriot therapist Harry, who removed his shoes and got stuck in. There was no small talk, but the sound of my ‘oohing’ and ‘ahhing’ each time Harry came across a knot in my back and applied a bearable pressure using circular motions. After my treatment, which lasted forever, I felt born again and the look I gave Harry was the kind that you would when the priest says ‘do you take this man’. I feel deeply in love with Harry’s hands and fell deeper when he said he loves what he does because he feels like he is giving and receiving. ‘All of the people that work with Relax and do massage are qualified massage therapists; our therapists care about what they do and we are passionate about what we do as a company,’ Peter proudly proclaims. A treatment at Relax was just that; a proper massage that didn’t just relax the mind, but also relaxed the body, giving it the therapeutic treatment it needs. Relax provides an acupressure sequence that’s important for the therapist giving it as much as the person receiving it. Their treatment list includes energising forms of massage that don’t just ease you to sleep but help you to realise the benefits and keep you coming back and their philosophy is simple; they don’t cross the line between a massage and a beautifying skin polish. Straight after our treatments, myself and two other members of the Complexd team were eager to book the next appointment. After a Spirulina Detox Wrap at the Covent Garden spa, which cleanses the body from the inside out using detoxifying Spirulina and organic oils, our business advisor came out from her wrap beaming, without the suffocating feeling she has experienced with body wraps before. So what’s the secret and what makes it different from any other day spa? Well, for one, you can pop in for a fully clothed 10-minute chair message for as little as £14, seven days a week. The Relax concept, pioneered by Thaisa Box, started through a love for massage and an epiphany in Azbekistan. Peter explains how an international call at 3am UK time led to launching the UK’s first drop-in Spa’s in the heart of London. The goal was to make it convenient enough so that it encourages the busy British public to revitalise and regain strength for their tough weeks of work. For more info visit www.relax.org.uk 110 | COMPLEXD
COMPLEXD | 111
Images by Henry Robinson 112 | COMPLEXD
“Relax is what it’s called and relaxed is what it is.” Name | Beverly Joseph Occupation | Feature Writer /Self employed Tried & Tested | Intense Muscle Release I’m a firm believer that when you have a demanding and tiring lifestyle, like myself and many other women you tend to have a lot of tension within. My mind and body works nonstop, my Sundays don’t exist, finding time in the week solely for me is very scarce and if and when I do, unwinding is a challenge, as my mind is still tuned into work mode. As my work demands build, so does the tension in my body and sometimes it affects me physically. Before my experience at Relax, I had an irritating discomfort in my neck and shoulders. Entering Relax, I was anticipating a feeling of intimidation, however was met with a flooding warmth and friendliness, unlike the typical clinical spas I have experienced in the past. This was felt throughout from decorum of staff to the decor. Before starting the treatment, I was introduced to my masseuse Emiliano, who was very calming and relaxed, making me feel the same. I chose the Tui na massage, which is the world’s oldest form of massage. The vigorous, clothed massage, using ancient Chinese Taoist principles to get your energy flowing and bring your body into balance, released all of my tension. The benefits of the massage were felt soon after, not only in my body but also in my mind; I felt reawakened, refreshed and ready for the rest of the week. Relax allowed me to unwind, clearing my mind from my strenuous daily routine, indulging me with precious time for me. It’s essential that we take this time out for ourselves to relax and unwind whether it’s in the form of massage or manicure, Relax provided me within a hub of relaxation and peace, like a holiday but in an hour and less costly! Edited by Ashleigh Johnson-Palmer
COMPLEXD | 113
COMPLEXDCLASSIFIED
your
ry stino the
first ever
body gossip book
Model: Zaraah Abrahams, actress
What’s YOUR Body Gossip? ...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Body Gossip is a national organisation that encourages people to engage in dialogue about their bodies. We provide a platform for your voice to be heard & aim to promote confidence & acceptance through sharing. To take part in this real beauty revolution & for a chance for your story to appear in our forthcoming book, log on to
www.bodygossip.org/book ...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
YOUR
AD HERE
‘From our page to your business or product’ e: advertise@complexd.co.uk
114 | COMPLEXD
Lifespa says tell the world to wait a while, you need time For you. Time to come to life..... 15% discount on all 60 minute Dermalogica, Elemis, CACI, Lifespa Prescribed Massage Treatments when quoting Complexd magazine.
Celebrate International Women’s Day - 8th March 2012
Offer applies during the week during the day 10am to 5pm (excludes eves & wknds)
www.cometolife.co.uk 020-8567-5159 Photo: Jennifer Warren, South Sudan
COMPLEXD | 115
Image by Frederique Rapier
116 | COMPLEXD
Dear Mummy, I wish you would
RELAX! Reader offer:
Treat your mum on mother’s day (18th March 2012 UK) with 20% off a 30 minute or 1 hour massage/beauty treatment at Relax Day Spa in London. Visit www.relax.org.uk for a full list of treatments and prices.
How:
If you, your mum, a relative or loved one has had a stressful year and needs to revitalise and rejuvenate, book your treatment now by calling the Covent Garden spa on 0207 871 4567 and saying – I love Complexd Magazine and I love massage!
Terms: Treatments must be booked a minimum of 24 hrs in advance. The discount cannot be combined with other offers and payments must be made in cash or credit card only. This offer expires on the 30th April 2012. COMPLEXD | 117
For daily updates visit www.complexd.co.uk/blog/ 118 | COMPLEXD