WHAT’S YOUR NAME AGAIN?

FOUR TIPS TO REMEMBERING NAMES

Article provided by Heather Ostrowski

Before we dive into the specific tips for remembering names, the key to getting better at this skill is to actually care about it. Just like any hobby, sport or skill you want to master, it requires practice. So … do you care? Are you ready to commit to practicing? Are you sure? Are you ready?

I am laughing right now at the visual of the people who just shrugged their shoulders, decided they didn’t care enough to read on, and turned the page. I also honor their honesty. To you, brave and determined soul, thank you for caring!

Why it Matters

In Dale Carnegie’s book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” he says in Human Relation Principle #6: Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language. As if this isn’t enough reason to care about remembering names, some other good reasons are:

• helps you in your professional success

• attracts people who want to be in your circle of social contacts

• saves you from the embarrassment of not knowing a person’s name the next time you see them

• creates the impression that you’re a person who is genuine and thoughtful

Now that you are fully committed to mastering this practice, let’s move on to the tips.

The Tips

Tip #1: Stop the negative self-talk! How many times have you heard or said this statement? “I never remember names” or “I am really bad at remembering names” or “I hope there isn’t a test later, because I will never remember all of your names.”

Here’s why: Every time you say things out loud, whether positive or negative, your brain hears you. AND your brain believes you are telling it the truth. You need to tell your brain a new story about your ability to retain and recall names.

So the next time you have the opportunity to recall a name, try saying this instead: “Remembering names is really important to me and I am getting better at it every day!”

Tip #2: Catch the name and repeat it. Really lean in and listen. Did you hear it? Did you hear it correctly? Didn’t catch it? Ask again. Repeat it immediately to make sure you heard it right. Repeating it also will help it stick in your memory. If it is unique and you want to be sure you are hearing it correctly, ask them to spell it. You can insert it once or twice in your brief conversation including “It was nice to meet you, David!” as you close your conversation.

Tip #3: Create a name association. Our memory works best when we can associate the new thing we are trying to learn with something that is already stored in our memory. Associate this person’s name with someone who has the same name you know well. Associate the name with where they work or where they live. Exaggerated pictures in your mind work well for an association.

Dale Carnegie said, “Paint a mind picture of the person whose name you wish to remember doing something that reminds you of the person’s name. Have the face and body of the person you wish to remember in the picture so that, when the picture comes to mind, you get both the face and the name.”

Tip #4: Document the name and review it. It’s up to you to determine what will work for documenting. I like to connect on LinkedIn when I meet someone new. I even send them a message that says “I enjoyed meeting you at last night’s Chamber After Hours event.” This provides a reference that helps me remember where and when the first meeting took place. Review your connections the next time you plan to be at a similar event.

Some people use file cards, spreadsheets or sophisticated contact management systems. It doesn’t matter what system you use, but you must develop a way to track the contacts so you can review them.

It’s Up To You

These tips can be used all together or in isolation. Pick one and start using it right away. It will require both commitment and practice to using these tips, and initially it may seem like more work than it’s worth.

Over time, remembering names will become a natural habit and you will surprise yourself the next time you easily recall a person’s name. You’ll find yourself saying out loud “I am really good at remembering names” and it will have become the truth.