DE-STRESSING

CALM, RELAX, RESTORE

When your body experiences stress, your cortisol increases and your body tries to get back to homeostasis, so weight loss is halted. Think about ways to eliminate stress or at least manage it. Many of my clients have benefited from techniques such as: yoga; deep breathing (take 5-10 deep breaths anytime you feel anxious or a stressed); meditation (although a 20 minute session is great, I have clients start by simply taking three minutes at 3 p.m. each day). Find a go-to way you can calm an anxious mind, relax and restore your mind and body to a stress-free state.

Mother of the Bride,

Before you continue reading, I want you to take a deep breath, close your eyes, and reflect on this next chapter your daughter is about to start. Think about the moments and the journey that has lead up to her finding the one she will spend the rest of her life with, and then picture her wedding day. Not necessarily the details or the event itself, but the moments that will become memories. Moments like when she puts her dress on for the first time or walks down the aisle. Moments that only happen once.

As my husband and I have continued to photograph weddings over the years, we have noticed a common trend: The mother of the bride becomes the hero by completing last minute errands and making sure everyone is taken care of. While this is honorable, I encourage you to be fully present instead.

Here’s how you can: 1. Delegate

While I know that you are more than capable of handling it all and multi-tasking like a queen, I want you to be present on this day. I often say that not only should brides have personal attendants, but mothers of the brides should as well. Do you have a best friend or close relative that would be willing to help you delegate errands and tasks throughout the day? Turn your phone on silent and allow yourself to be fully present. If it’s absolutely urgent, someone will let you know.

2. Leave the camera at home

While it’s tempting to bring your family camera from home, I encourage you to leave it there. Why? Because your daughter will want you in these images. If you would like to have some behind-the-scenes images, have a close friend take them on your phone. Leave the cameras behind, because trust me when I say that you will want to be in these photos.

3. Feel the emotions

Last year we were photographing a wedding at a local venue here in Fargo. As the bride was about to put on her shoes, the mother of the bride offered to help. As she was helping her daughter, she was reminded of the many times she had helped her tie her shoes as a little girl. The simple task of putting on shoes became a special moment for the bride and her mom. When these moments and emotions come, feel them. These moments are a gift.

Let me end with this: You are an irreplaceable part of not only your daughter’s wedding day, but also her life. No matter the current strength of your relationship, you share the unique and special bond of being mother and daughter. Give the gift of your time, your presence and your attention. Allow yourself to be a part of these moments while creating once-in-a-lifetime memories together.

You're engaged!

³ First, tell your friends and family

³ Nail down a budget, including who will be able to contribute and how much

³ Envision your wedding — think about the style you want, season, colors, location

³ Get that gorgeous ring appraised and insured right away

12+ months before:

³ Set your date

³ Visit, choose and book your ceremony and reception sites (popular venues book up early so get this done as soon as you've made a decision)

³ Choose your wedding party

³ Start looking at dresses in magazines and online, then start shopping for your gown

³ Pick a photographer and set up an engagement photo session

³ Start working on your guest list and acquiring addresses