LEARNING TO LOVE YOURSELF WITH CHRONIC ILLNESS

How do you fall in love with your less than perfect body?

More than 40% of the total population of this country su ers from a chronic illness. According to the U.S. National Center for Health Statistics, a disease lasting three months or longer can be a chronic illness. About half of all adults have a chronic condition, and approximately 8% of children ages 5 to 17 were reported by their parents to have limited activities due to at least one chronic disease or disability.

These statistics are alarming and intriguing at the same time. But what if you are one of these numbers? What happens when you are the one with a chronic illness?

You cannot nd a handbook for life with chronic illness. Life will be di erent and challenging, and you have to constantly adjust your schedule and lifestyle according to your health needs.

I am not a health coach. I am merely a person living with chronic illness for more than a decade. I have hit rock bottom, lost friends, found new ones, changed careers … it has never been an easy road, and it will not be. However, during the ups and downs of living with a chronic illness, I have realized something simple — everything around us will change when we are chronically ill, but learning to love ourselves with the chronic illness can keep us moving forward.

The process is tricky, and I will not say, "If I can do it, you can too." It takes time, patience and you need to relearn how you can healthily express your feelings. This is how you can get started:

A New Normal

The way you used to do things probably will not work anymore. Hair-straightener was my everyday friend before the illness. Gradually, it became an impossible chore to perform every single day. So, I began looking for ways to bring out my natural hair texture. I started taking proper care and learned to love this less-thanperfect, oh-so-frizzy, curly hair.

Some days your energy will be better, some days it will be worse, and here comes the famous Spoon Theory. This is a personal story by Christine Miserandino, who lives with lupus, a chronic autoimmune disease. Spoon Theory is famous among many people dealing with chronic illness. It describes the idea of limited energy using spoons as the unit of energy. For example, someone with a chronic disease can wake up with ten spoons, whereas a person without a chronic illness may have thrice the amount. For people with chronic illness the energy depends on many factors, including stress levels, sleeping, pain and work intensity.

So, do you spend all your energy on one big task and spend the rest of the day in pain lying in bed? Or do you balance out with 2-3 small tasks throughout the day? You have to discover the sweet spot and nd the balance between unnecessary tasks and essential ones.

Open Your Mind to New Possibilities

I am a strong believer in "When one door closes, another one opens." I was a dentist with a thriving career when the illness took over my body. I will not lie; I went through dark, cold depression. During this period, I started blogging my story. It gave me a new purpose, created a new career path, and 11 years later, I am still writing and creating content.

Find Your Tribe

You will need someone you can talk to. Someone who can guide you because they are going through the same situation. Some days you will not even want any advice, you just need to vent or maybe cry a little, and you need someone to listen and genuinely empathize. Your tribe will do that. Find an online or local support community. A chronic physical illness leaves its mark on our mental health. Don't bottle up your frustration. You do not have to go through this alone, my friend.

I found my tribe through my blog and social media. It is not only I who is helping them; they are helping me too. They give me support and love when I go through a bad episode.

Learn To Forgive Yourself

The more you live with a chronic illness, the more you miss out on regular events, like going to your kid's play, browsing the mall with friends, or simply having an outdoor date with your partner without inching in pain. This creates a huge toll. Hatred towards the situation and yourself comes naturally.

Most of the time, we o en think, "Why me?" If you are spiritual, you may nd solace in a higher purpose. But, to many people, it forms a pang of guilt and resentment. You need to understand that you cannot blame yourself or others for the circumstances. You just accept it and forgive yourself.

We have different paces and stages in our lives. Whether you are just starting your journey with a chronic illness or have already spent a long time with it, it's always complicated. But how you look at things and how you feel about yourself will determine how you can handle the process. Love and acceptance will make this bitter pill easier to swallow.

If you want to connect and talk about your chronic illness , you can always reach out to me through my blog sifascorner.com or my social media handle @sifascorner. Stay healthy, stay beautiful!

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I strive to make decisions with my patients, to be empathetic, compassionate and straight forward. Your care should be a collaboration between you and your doctor.