Concrete issue 135 13 02 2002

Issue 135 路 Wednesday, February 13, 2002

UEA'S INDEPENDENT STUDENT NEWSPAPER

FREE

h got pregnant by a pimp who made her go out and ork. When she went into labour he made her erv1ce three punters. When she got o ho l h bpby had died."

Union defend decision as motion is put to Council for Grad Ball subsidy KATIE HIND

News Editor

THE ANNUAL Summer Ball is set for a fall after it was revealed it will take place during the exam period. In the past, the event has been held in June when undergraduate students had completed their work. But this year, managers of the Potters Leisure complex have only given the Union one date- which is May 19. Union Communications Officer, Emma Reynolds defended the date of the party

and claims there is nothing that can be done to change it. "lt literally is the only date they gave us. Potters can only give us one Sunday a year as it disrupts all of their bookings as a holiday resort. "lt is basically the only venue within an hour of Norwich, besides UEA, that can cope with an event of 1ts size so we can't afford to be choosy. If we don't have that date this year then it simply wouldn't happen," said Emma. But she still believes that the ball will be as popular as ever with students. "lt is a great venue and it really is the event of the year for a lot of students. lt

is a shame about the date but I'm sure that with all your fantastic time management skills you'll all still be able to make it," she added. But there could be good news for this year's graduation ball. Following the Concrete survey findings, which revealed that 82% of those questioned did not feel that the LCR was an appropriate location for the ball, we are to submit a motion to Union Council to make sure students are given a better graduation. If the proposition is supported, the Union would be forced to financially support the ball and lobby the University to

find an alternative venue for congregation ceremonies. Union Communications Officer, Emma Reynolds insists that if the Union are to fund the event in the future, the Council has to support it. "If there is going to be a change in funding the ball, it has be decided at Union Council. But Emma revealed that even if the motion does go through at the meeting, the venue wi 11 not be changed unti I next year. "If Union Council decides this, it will go to plan for next year's ball as if we don't start booking something now, we

won't get anything," said Emma. But she claims Concrete's survey has not been in vain. Although the ball will still be held in the LCR -there will be an improved set of entertainment. "The survey has not been a waste of time as what is at the ball will be different. lt will still be in the LCR because we can't find another venue, but we are making a concerted effort to restructure the events," added Emma. Currently the Union claims that they do not make a profit from the graduation ball -despite charging 拢29 per ticket. Under the amendment, a fund would continued on page 2

THE EVENT: PORN, MILLS & BOON, OCEAN'S 11 AND MORE ...

21\JEWS

www.concrete-onl i ne .co. uk

Concrete

CONCRETE Union Council CONTENTS NEWS 1 2

Plans for this year's Summer Ball to be held during the exam period. • Concrete are to appeal to Union Council. • Planned changes for this y~r·s grad ball.

• TV presenter, Toby Anstis reveals he won't be coming to the LCR. • Sex Survey shows UEA students are ugly.

• Shock t umble dryer pranks. • University appeal for more policing.

• Earlham Hall is safe. A look at Nightline's new office .

• Mr and Mrs UEA show is turned down. Campus on alert after TB sca re

• The LCR top f ifty tunes. • Short-loan library is latest University building to be v1ctim to crime .

to consider Bal l subsidy Union could end up paying for better ents package continued from front page be se t asrde to ensure that the even t rs not held 1n th e LCR - bu t rn somewhere more ~u rt a bl e for such a specral occasron. Last term, Concrete carrred out an exte nsrve survey and found th at th e ma) orr ty of st udents were not happy about payrng such a hr gh prrce for a nrght rn the LCR. However, over ha lf of the sam -

VALENTINE'S DAY MESSAGES: • Has someone left you a message this Valentine 's Day?

PLAYING YOUR CARDS RIGHT: • What's t he psychology behind Valentine's cards? Concrete asked a psychologist.

LOOK: • The sex issue gets its kit off for an underwear shoot. LCR fashion under the microscope- does dressing sexy make a difference?

COFFEE BREAK: Your horoscopes revealed plus Concrete's cartoon, Eastern Youth .

LETTERS: • Letters to the ed itor.

SPORT EA Pirates stun Hertfordshire. 21 •• UBasketball club pipped in last minute. • UEAFC approach local cup semi-final.

• Studs Up: Concrete's girls take over to look at football from the female perspective. Yoga is becom ing one of the most popular pasttimes in Britain. it's also UEA's biggest society. But what's it all about?

• UEA RFC close in on promotion . • Netballers gain sweet revenge. Norw ic h City struggle for form . Again .

• Golf club earn shock win aga inst Loughborough. • Your quick pri ze crossword .

VALENTINES day could go off with a bang this year, thanks to the UEA Rag society. Th e soc tety, wh tc h stages fun d raising events, wt ll be se ll i ng heltum ft lled heart bal loons tn t he hive , t he proceeds of whtch will go to the British Heart Foundation.

ate rn t he old sports cen re whrch rs now known as the Tyn dal l Cent re fo r Cl rmat e Change. Do you wan t a better gradua t ron day? If so , see your school · ~ Unron Council represe ntatrve and urge them to vote m favou r on March 5. If you are unsure of who your rep rs, ema rl su.academ rc@uea.ac. uk.

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CONCRETE'S MOTION Motion for the Union· of UEA S!uderits to Support an Improved Graduation Ball This Union Notes: 1) That the Union Ents department is responsible for providing students with a Graduation Ball. 2) That the University is responsible for the for. . mal Congregation ceremonies. . 3) That last year, the Graduation Ball took place in the LCR, and that Congregation were held in the Tyndall Centre (the former Sports Centre). · 4) Other uni_ versities of the same calibre. as l)EA · have their balls at ·more impressive places a_nd · ' . · have chart bands attending.

whether students could be dragged under. LIFESTYLE: • Concrete's legendary sex survey reports for a th ird year: what, where, and how you're doing it. Just don't mention Janet Street -Porter ...

pi e sard they would pay up to £40 rf the venue was changed But rf the event was to be held rn the LC R agarn thrs year. 65% wou ld not be prepa red to pay any more thar £10 . Most v1ould also be prepared to travel a reaso nable dr stance lo the rrght place. And JUSt 6% of undergradua tes who took part are happy to gra du-

13, 2002

Rag to fly high for Valentine's

Rag

FEATURES . . ·_· The murky world of prostitution in 10 FOCUS: Norwich - a special investigation asks 12

WEAES u AY, fEE" J A'i V

This Union Believes: -

·-·'· 1) That al l students shou Id have the opportunity

.· to have a memorable graduation day. This includes the daytime activities and the ball

afterwards. 2) That UEA students should get value for money and not be ripped off in any way. 3) That the ·LCR is not a suitably prestigious location for a such an event as the ball to ta,ke place in . 4) That the Tyndall Centre is not a suitable . venue for graduation ceremonies to take place in . This Union Resolves:

..'

1) To support an improved Graduation Ball financially: this would require ttie Union to sub- · sidise the event beyond the revenue from ticket sale~ . · · 2) To campaign for.the University to improve the · Congregation venues: this would see the issue taken to the relevant personnel in the University, with the aim that future ceremonies do iwUake place in the Tyndall Centre, which was formerly known as the Sports Centre.

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Taxi warning STUDENTS i n the Golden Triangle area of the city have been put on alert by local police after a bogus taxi driver attempted to coax a young female into his car. The gi rl , wh o ts a student at th e Unt verst t y, was wa lk tng tnto Cam brtd ge Street- JUSt off Unt hank Road, when she was aske d by a man tl she wanted a taxt. ,. \ n: unc '" ith all) lll lun natJun nn the " llemplt'd at l.tL k 11 lll c h liappencd on Tu,•,tbt\ 1-c hruar' 5 at an>urHJ Ill. 'Ill pm. ' hou ld ,·ontat·l )'(' Bl"ke "I l.arlh"m p.,Jr,·c ' t.rlhll1 1" ca lli ng (I i flO.l 76\ "(1lJ

Teaching poll

Graduatio day to be a success

THE HUNT is on for the best lecturer at UEA. St uden t s are betng aske d to th ei r favou rt te nom i nate m ember ol aca de m tc staff l or t heir outstanding teac hing for l or t h ts yea r's Awards Excellence tn Teachtng.

Union change plans for this year's bash

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THANKS to the Concrete survey, which undoubtedly revea led that students demand big-name bands and a sit-down meal, this year's finalists can at last look forward grad ball they will enjoy. La>t night plan-. were un,c:ikd for the p os~ ibilit y that the chart topping act Mi,·Tt:t:t) co uld perform at this yea r's ball. ll' riles

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for all 'wde nt ,. .. It.!., to tr: and t:O\Cr more area ) or de, ire' or the \IUJCill pupu) alion."

tr on ha' bee n re peated ai't er tile· "U<.' CC ~I., O f h.ht : car \ a\\"al d '\. Nomin .llion' ci Ll\e on '. larch 27. rnrm ' can he co llected from l 'ni nn llou' c recepl tnn. the R cg r , tr~ alllJ the Lib r;u~ rcceptinntJc,k .

Band appeal ROCK star wannabes could be given their pathway to fame.

ElinJonn. i\nd to add to the good nc11 '· Union Exec abo decitkd l~"t night thal there ''ill be a formal dinner in a local hotel for tho-,c 11 ho 11 i'h to celebrate more lJUICtl). The London-tnt>cd girl) rr io could appear if the Un ion are prepared 10 pay the i I 0.000 fee. The band arc mosl famou<, for their top ten hit, >liCh as A ll I Want and Wh y. which have been nominat-

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r\ local hand i' appealing for ne11 me mher' to join lhl' ir hand." lt ich i' ha1.,cd in 1or\\ ic h. The\ arc ILloking for a 13a" pia) cr/ Lcatl S inger an d a dr ummer They dc'>crihe rhermclw ' "' a hca ') ctl\c r' ban d. CLJ\C ring the like' of Mctallica. Sihcr Chair and Creed. For more informati on call Simon on 07810 654139 or Roh 07751 664651.

NEWS3

www.concrete-on line.co. uk

Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

SEX ISSUE Want to find out what the men of UEA think of the women? Or vice-versa? . he ladies prefer? Then turn to pages 12-13 for the nous a m our a

TV star cancels visit Se~ poll shows ugliness and after st~rn warning stupidity 1

Toby Anstis turns down School Daze performance KATIE HIND Deputy Editor

STUDENTS at UEA are merely average when it comes to looks, sexual performance, fidelity and even intelligence, Concrete's sex survey has revealed.

FORMER children's TV presenter Toby Anstis has revealed that he will not be performing at UEA this term.

The results show that females at the University are more than dissatisfied with the men at UEA - who received a rating of just four out of ten in both looks and sexual performance categories. Males were also rated at 3.8 out of ten for fidelity.

The 30-year-old has cancelled his appearance at the Back to School Disco, which is scheduled for February 22, after two students attacked his colleague Pat Sharp while he was on stage last month. The ex-Childrens BBC host was warned off by Mr Sharp, who with the former works Broomcupboard favourite at the London-based radio station, Heart 106.2 after a pint of beer was thrown at him and his jacket was ripped by drunken LCR路goers after they jumped on the stage. Both revellers were ordered to leave the 90s night, which featured a show by Pat Sharp. Mr Anstis' agent, Guy Robinson confirmed that the radio star's decision was based on the treatment of his colleague when he was at UEA. "Toby and Pat have the same management company and obviously discuss things. He was concerned about performing at a gig where he considered the clients unruly to the point of being dangerous." But Mr Robinson claims that

Above: Pat Sharpe after his performance in the LCR and below right: Toby Anstis

the Challenge TV worker's mind was made up when he was offered television work on the same night as he was due to be at the University. "He has television commitments which mean that he wouldn't be able to come anyway, which he is contractually allowed to do," said Mr fobinson. And a spokEJSWoman for Pat Sharp expressed the former Funhouse presenter's disappointment at his jacket - which was worth 拢500, being ruined. "He was ge~ing ready to go when someone !pulled his jacket that he got for Christmas. But I know that Pat enjoyed the gig, he said that the incident was a shame because it was going well." But the problems are not exclusive to UEA. "We have had quite a few problems lately with students getting over-excited and mauling him, so now bouncers have to take him to and from the stage," added the spokeswoman. Union Entertainments Manager Nick Rayns h~s called for stu-

Elections to grip UEA STUDENTS can decide who they want to be next year's Union representatives tomorrow (Thursday, February 14). Candidates in the elections are running for the four sabbatical

LIZ HUTCHlNSON Assistant News Editor

positions, Academic, Communications, Finance and Welfare. 1 And for the first time elections will take place for the part-time candidates too. Voting takes place in the LCR between 11 am and 5pm.

dents to act more responsibly in the future. "Everyone expects students to behave boisterously and have fun. "But there is a line and if you go over it, you risk not gettiog these acts. You also risk losing a

good reputation," said Mr Rayns. But he denies that there is any hard feeling between the Union and Mr Anstis. "If he doesn't want to come, then we don't want him to come," he added.

According to the girls, the ugliness of the UEA men is not even compensated by intelligence - they received just 5.4 out of ten. But it seems the feeling is mutual. Males at UEA rated the women slightly higher- giving them 5.6 out of ten for looks and 5.5 out of ten for sexual performance and intelligence. And they do not trust the women of UEA - who were rated a poor 4.2 out of ten for fidelity. The poll, in which over 300 students took part, al o revealed that UEA students regularly put their health at risk by having sex without protection. 61.2% of the men who completed the survey admitted to having unpro-

tected sex, compared to 47.7% of the women. But more worrying is that 15.5% of surveyed men have at some time in their life, contracted a sexually transmitted di ease. But girls are more careful - just 5.4% of them have admitted to having an STD. The concerning findings come after a national report conducted by condom manufacturer Durex found that 28% of 16-20 year olds and three in ten 21-24 year olds have had sex without a condom. More than one in ten admit having unprotected sex with a new partner in the last year- almost double the figure in 1994. And one in ten 16-20 year olds believe women who carry condoms to be sexually promiscuous. But Welfare officer Polly Evans hopes that UEA students have got the safe sex message by now. "I would love to say I am really surprised at the high numbers of people who confess to having had sex without protection but I'm not. "And of course they never look the type to have galloping clap but that doesn' t mean they don't and that doesn't mean you won ' t catch it (as your survey proves). "On a more serious note if you think you might have an STD make an. appointment at the new clinic based in the health centre where there are specially trained nurses to help you out," she added.

See pages 12 and 13 for results

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ummer Ball.

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NEWS

Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

Students spin and tumble • 1n late night dryer rides 'Wash club' activities condemned after students joy ride 1n dryers LIZ HUTCHINSON Assistant News Editor A CONTROVERSIAL club, which meets in the laundrette on campus has sparked fears that their activities could end in tragedy. Members of the Wash Club, which is shrouded in secrecy, meet late at night or in the early hours of the morning at the laundrette in The Street. The activity, also known as 'san game' and 'tumbling', consists of getting 1nto the tumble dryers and putting them on . A contest then begins to see how long each member can last inside the drum. lt is not know who organises the cl ub or when the meeting times are, but it is believed that the activity has been taking place

for a number of years. Union Welfare officer Polly Evans was bemused by the late night activities, but condemned the students responsible. "This is an extremely dangerous thing to do," she sa1d . "If you did it to your pets they'd put you in jail for it." The University-owned laundrette IS open 24 hours but is completely unattended. lt is however under camera surveillance. Security Ch1ef Barry Jeckell was unaware of the club - but has also condemned it. " If that's what they are doing then they are COiflpletely stupid but we haven't had any reports of driers being broken," said Mr Jeckell. There is a special helpl ine in the laundrette, which Concrete called to report the goings on . The response from Clean Machine LTD was one of disbe-

lief. "No one has had any reports for this kind of goings on. lt would be an extremely dangerous thing to do. First of all you could get hurt by the drum tossing you around let alone possible burns from the heat. "There shouldn't be any gases going through to the dner but they are simply not built for th1s type of activity. There would be damage to the bearings of the drier, as they are not bu i it for the weight of a human being," said a Spokeswoman for the company. And despite the supposed tradition behind the Wash Club, there have been no past reports about the activity. Members remain ever i 11 usive. "We've had reports of tramps sleeping in driers for the warmth in our other laundrettes but no incidents like this one," added the spokeswoman . The Launderette in The Street: venue for the 'Wash Club ', a late night covert student tumble drying organisation

Official backs call for campus police KATIE HIND Deputy Editor A UNIVERSITY security chief has backed PC Matthew Ellis' claims that there should be a 24-hour police presence on campus. Security and Traffic Manager Barry Jeckell believes a full -time policeman would be great for UEA. "We'd all like to have it, it would be ideal. There are times when their numbers do permit, and they are round here more often. " But it depends on their operational requirement at the time, who they can spare and if they can spare anyone," said Mr Jeckell. However. he c laims that even if

as a large village and every one of those has a dedicated officer. "A greater police presence is needed, but the mindset of the University is that if there are police present. there i a problem." aid PC Ell is. "Until we prioritise, students are a vulnerable target," he added. But Police Inspector Peter Walsh has defended the proposal - in sisting that the campus is a afe place. "Officers from the orwich South sector make regular patrol and vi sits to the University throughout the day and night. "There are always improvements that can be made, but bearing in mind the number of people using the campus, it is a safe place," said Inspector Walsh.

the post was created, the problem of crime on campus is not guaranteed to go away. "If you were lucky enough to have your own police officer on campu , whoever it was wouldn't be here 24 hours a day. seven days a week." But desplle there not being fulltime policing on campus. there is a liaison officer who works with the security department. Two weeks ago. University Liaison Officer, PC Matthew Ellis. called out to the University management to fund a full time policeman. He insisted that there are enough people using the Univer ity to warrant having a full-time member of taff. "The University is the same size

LCR survey to sniff out locals UNION Communications Officer, Emma Reynolds is appealing for students to bring their campus cards to any events held in the LCR . Emrna IS atternpt1ng to f1nd out who 1s us1ng the

fac1lit1es- and whether there are many locals attending the n1ghts. wh1ch 1nclude the LCR. Retro and 90s. ''llh.",llt\l'~ l'jl\111•.'1~ ltlll"} .\lld ~·.:I

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6NEWS

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Concrete

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY

13, 2002

Earlham Hall refit stalled Technology park delayed as campaigners secure short-term victory UEA's planning application to develop Earlham Hall into a science and technology park has been temporarily turned down. On February 5, after five months of campatgntng, the council announced that the scheme was to be postponed until 2005. Thts also means that UEA's lease on the butlding, which currently houses the Law school, has been extended. The decision follows a long hard battle between t l1e counctl and protests from those who use Earlham Hall and the area surroundtng tt. Frtends of Earlham Hall met ftrst tn early September, at whtch 24 people turned up. Later Margaret Staff and Jackte Rebecca, two ardent dog walkers from the area, became the main campatgners and mounted a campaign whtch resulted in over 670 obJecttons. One of the main problems was that the developments wou Id dtrectly affect those who beneftt from Earlham Hall, including U EA law students whose schoo l is housed there, and workers at the Hall's nursertes. Earlham Hall was also thought to have stgntftcant htstorical value for the area, as it was sold to the people of Norwtch tn 1925. Campatgners are delighted

New-look Nightline A STUDENT- RUN advice centre has been refurbished in an attempt to encourage more students to use it.

wtth the outcome and p leased it has f tnally been met after the Ctty council postponed the dectsion to talk about Earlham Hall three ttmes. Spokeswomen for Fnends of Earlham Park, Margaret Staff, was surprised - but relieved wtth the result. "I dtdn't expect wl1en I started off to get the response we got. The council have made us very happy." On February 21, Fnends of Earlham Park will meet at 7 .30pm tn the Nursery to plan a

'picntc tn the park' to be held later thts year. However, the campatgn ts not over; proposals for future use include houstng. University Ward councillor lan Wtlliams said: "We don't need more housing there and I wonder how the Friends would feel about any property and deve lopment." The delayed proposal also ratses questtons about the future of the law school, whtch ts housed at Earlham Hall. "Essentially, we know where we are gotng to be for the next three

years . However, although we are all very fond of Earlham Hall, we all recognise that it is not the ideal place to house the school of law long term. We have grown out of it, so longer term it doesn't sutt our needs," said Dean of Law, Alistair Mullice. "Clearly over the next year we've got to work out exac t ly what's gotng to happen to the School of Law, whether we end up wtth a brand new law school or tf extsttng butldtngs on campus are converted. it is a matter for discussion."

ightl i ne, a confidential l isteni ng and information -.en ice ba>cd in room COJ. 12 in Nor fo lk Terrace. is run and \taffcd ent ire ly by stu dent volunteer> who are on hand to give i nformation on anything from sexual health to U EA gigs and also provide free contracept ion. Nigh tlin e workers redeco rated the double room m er Christrnasand hope that the new surroundings arc more cosy and 1\'Ckoming to those who\\ ish to\ isil them. The E\temal Co-ordinator of the centre.\\ ho for the sake or conliden tiality has to remain anonymow•. is

pJea,ed wi th the new loo ~ . "We arc rea ll y pleased with our ne" I) decorated office. We hope it "ill maJ,.e w. more approachable to all 'tudcnu•. whether they want a breah. from the all night computing ce111re or something more serious:· said the student. The Nightl inc learn also prai,cd the support they have recei\cd from former helpers. " \Vc'd li~e to thank our preYiou' co-ordinator who \\orked 'er) hard co-ordit]aling this ... Nigh tl inc is a phone or drop in cen tre which i;. ope n from 8pm till Ram every night. Members of the learn can be con tacted on 0 1603 50.\.'iO.J or b) ernailing ueanightline(a hotrnail.com. For more information about ) ou can 1 is it ightlinc "\\ \\.uca.ac.uk/nightlinc

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Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

Cheer,eaders' King and Queen contest quashed But Afro-Caribbean society may keep competition alive Event "not based on appearance, but intelligence"

REBECCA LAWRE NCE

PLANS to hold a competition to allow students to vote for who they think should be crowned King and Queen of UEA were turned down by the Union this week. The Cheerleading Society put forward the idea, which was due to take place at the Valentine's ball on February 15, and were awaiting the go-ahead to begin planning the event. But Union officers voted against the event - claiming it would be discriminatory. "it is really good to see societies using their initiative to fundraise and contribute to Union entertainments," sa1d Union Communications Officer, Emma Reynolds. "However, in this case, the proposal from the cheerleaders gave us a bit of cause for concern. "Many students, after reading the Concrete article about the proposal, had specifically got in touch with us to complain about the idea. it is the Union's job to respond to student opinion so we had to act on this. "The proposal for judging was based on voting on a photograph and so was going to be based on looks alone." And Emma defended the Union Executive's ve rdict and insisted

Students' blood required

Popstars-style show plan ned for LCR REB ECCA LAWRENCE

FOLLOWING the Union 's decision to prevent t he Cheerleaders from host ing their King and Queen of UEA competition , the AfroCaribbean society plan to link up with three other clubs to put on a similar event. They plan to work with Nexus, the American Football club and Photosoc to hold a contest which would attempt to fi nd a King and Queen of UEA.

Above: President of the Cheerleading Society, A/ex Simmwise

that the decision is based on the overall feelings of UEA students. "No decision is ever easy as an executive because we have to choose what we think is the best choice for our students. " it must reflect the opinion of UEA students, and when there are

And lack of local vaccinat ions lea_ve many at risk

A UEA student has been diagnosed with the potentially fatal disease TB.

Those willing to participate should make an appointment in advance at Union House reception. But students who have had an ear, nose, body piercing or a tattoo in the la t year will not be able to donate. Por more jnfomtation call 084:; 7 711 711 or 路 it www. .eo.

competition to be run. However Emma insists that she is still keen to support society events. "lt is a positive thing for any society to run an event for the University, and so we will encourage any activities whenever we can," added Emma.

TB case identified MATIHEW MULLEN

STUDENTS at the UEA are being asked to help save a life- by donating blood. The National Blood Service will hold blood donor sessions in the LCR on March 4, Sand 11, between lOam and 12.45 and 2.00 and 4.15 each day.

only 14 Union Officials, and 12,000 students, it can be a hard task. We talked the issue through very thoroughly," The Afro-Caribbean society is planning a similar event and has been asked to make a detailed proposal of how they intend their

The UEA Meningitis Active Response Team was called in to identify the illness and coordinate all students who were potentially at risk after prolonged contact with the patient.

However, further cases of TB have come to light in the student population since the case was reponed. The tudent in question i said to be re ponding well to treatment and has returned to his studie . Union Welfare Officer Polly Evan , who has praised the quick response by the medical service, advi es students to remain alert for pos ible case of TB or Meningiti . "I'd lher t~~dents wer over

cautiou . If anyone is experiencing symptoms I'd rather they'd go to the Medical Centre on a false alarm." However Concrete's enquirie have revealed worrying information concerning orfolk Health Authority's vaccination policy. It has been revealed that between 1989 and 1997 the Norfolk Health Authority failed to implement a general BCG immuni ation program in local school - leaving thou ands of orfolk resident who turned thirteen during that eightyear period without the immunisation. But Dr Coathup of the UEA Health Centre claims that TB is not an illne that has to be dealt with frequently. "TB i a rare disease. We have on average one ea e per year. However, we do f~nd about 250 patients every year who have not been immuni ed with the BCG vaccination. "It doesn't happen often in this

community, but we should be aware of the risk," said Dr Coathup. And he has warned students to be aware of the illness. " It' s a bacterium which can affect the lungs or more rarely the kidneys and is spread through droplet infection. "Symptoms include a prolonged cough, coughing up blood, prolonged weight lo and fatigue, all over a period of weeks. BCG gives the best protection there is against it, ensuring 60 to 80% immunity," he added. The Medical Centre has a nurse on site 24 hours a day and has an emergency holline which can be reached by dialling 3000. However, this cannot be dialled on a mobile phone. Students who do not have acce s to a landline must call the full number for the medical centre on 01603 592 172. Doctor Coathup admit thi i difficult to remember in an emergency - but has promised to addres the problem.

Similar to the Cheerleading society's plans. auditions will be held over the next couple of weeks before judges narrow down the number of participants by 20%. Nexu , the student television station, are likely to record the selection proce s, which will be broadcast during the interval on the night in a similar way to the ITV show, Popstars .

The final 40 candidates will participate in five rounds, three of which will involve catwalks which will feature students wearing swim wear, casual clothing and evening wear. The two later rounds will see the candidates being quizzed on a variety of subjects. Prizes will include a profes ional modelling shoot. RuflDer-up prizes are still to be decided by the organisers. All money raised from tickets sold for the event will go to charity - but the show organisers are sti 11 to choose which one. Gareth Amfo-ayyei, a member of the Afro-Caribbean society, claims the competition is not based on appearances - but the intelligence of the contestants. "We want to raise money for charity, it's not only about how pretty the contestants are. They may be asked to write an essay about themelves - it's only a bit of fun," said Gareth.

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NEWS

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Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBR UARY 13 , 2002

LCR vote Chesney the Short loan • number one and only break- 1n Pop Idol Chesney Hawkes tops the LCR 50 chart LIZ HUTCHINSON

Assistant News Editor LIZ HUTCHINSON Ass istant News Editor

UEA FAVOURITE Chesney Hawkes is celebrating after coming top of the charts in the recent LCR 50. The prince of pop is said to be thrilled after learning of his success and thanked all of t hose at UEA who · voted for him. Head of promotions at RCA, Geri Perry, said that Chesney had thoroughly enjoyed his university tour- and has a soft spot for U EA. "He has been kn ocked out by the response he has seen wh i 1st tou ring and particularly enjoyed his gig at UEA, " said Ms Perry. The chart, in which over a t housand students voted, is in its second year. Union Entertainments Manager, Nick Rayns was glad that LCR 50 night was a successwith 13 50 studen ts buying -tickets for the event. " it's a really unique night where students get to choose what is played all night and it gives us an indication of what they like .

Above: Chesney Hawkes

" However, every year people try to sneak so met hing in. Take this year's number nine, Huey Lewis' Power of Love , I'm sure there was a concerted effort to get that into the top ten," said Mr Rayns. " In fact, we had such a positive reaction to the event, that we are planning a retro 50." Pop groupS Club 7 also scored highly with LCR going st udentscoming in at number two with the highest new entry, Don't stop moving. This is the second year the seven have been rated by U EA students. Last year their hit Reach took pole position . However, it fai led to reach the top spot this year, sl umping eleven places to number twelve . Two new entries in the top five include pint sized diva Ky l ie Minouge with her latest tune Can't Get You Out Of My Head and Queen with Bohemian Rhapsody. And Steps showed that, despite the sp li t, they sti ll remain the key to UEA's life, with tragedy coming in at thirty-e ight. Juke box favourite, Gold by Spa ndau Bal let was also a nonmover. Eastender Martin Kemp was reportedly unavailable for comment.

DESPERATE th ieves broke their way into the short loan collection of the library at the weekend - but left empty handed. The incident happened on February l when the thief forced their way into the rear of the circulation department on the ground floor of the building. Librarians believe that the burglar were targeting valuable IT equipment although nothing was actually stolen.

break-in and thanks to the efforts of several members of Library staff, we were able to clear up quickly and efficiently once the loca l police had fini shed at the scene. " We had to shut the CD Music Library on Monday February 4 for a stock check, and fortunately have found nothing ntissing," said Ms Inglis. " Measures have been taken to ensure that the area is secure and we are conducting a thorough review of the existing security measures," She added.

The culprits had run away by the time University security arrived on the scene. Security chief Barry Jeckell aid that the perpetrators entered the library through a window. 'They got in through the top window, couldn't see anyth.ing they wanted and then left again so that tho e responsible had left by the time we arrived on the scene," said Mr Jeckell. And Director of Library Resources, Kitty lnglis, was relieved that nothing was stolen and insisted that security in the library was bei ng looked at. "A considerable arnounl of mess and disruption was caused by the Above: Short loan area of the library

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WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY

COMMENT

www.concrete-online.co.uk

13, 2002

Opinion

Golden balls?

Access all areas? As final year students formulate their graduation plans, those with disabilities will be forced to use an unceremonious back entrance to receive their scroll. Mark Womersley says that's indicative of attitudes at UEA knew studying for a degree at UEA as a wheelchair user was not going to be easy - you only have to see the abundance of concrete steps, narrow doors and the scarcity of Iifts to come to that conclusion . However, although forewarned about the physical obstacles that the university would throw up, what I wasn't prepared for were the institutional barriers to be encountered here. I'm not just talking about those practices which are openly discriminatory, as these are usually easier to identify and subsequently easier to address. No, I am referring to a discriminatory practice of a more insipid and insidious nature, which permeates the very fabric of the institution itself: the culture of indifference. Those who I might have expected this type of reaction from, my fellow students, have on the whole been fairly responsive (after a fashion), as have the majority of aca~emic staff I have come into contact with (apart from the few 'old school' who are still comfortable using descriptive words such as 'negro', 'vegetable' and 'brain dead' as part of their everyday language). But I have found that the culture of the institution itself as a whole has been one of latent resistance, with many of its staff seemingly having been affected. Nothing ever seems to be easily achieved here, it feels like you constantly have to fight for, or justify, anything you may need (access, support, equality). lt appears there has been very little forethought as to the general or specific needs of disabled people, and the impression I get is that although they accept that you may initially make 'a bit of a fuss', they rely on you soon

becoming so swamped with the normal pressures of academic life that you will soon lose the will (as well as the time) to fight. I would argue that the Dean of Students office, within which the responsibility for co-ordinating such support falls, is particularly guilty of this. They have a 'dedicated' co-ordinator for students with disabilities who a) isn't a disabled person and therefore cannot really appreciate the problems faced by disabled people (can you imagine having a male co-ordinator for women's issues?), and b) is in need of some intense disability awareness training, particularly when it comes to addressing disabled people . The Student Union itself fares no better, as it has no dedicated officer to deal with the issues of disabled students (as it does for race , gender, environmental issues etc.), with them instead coming under the remit of a catch-all equal opps. rep. Physical access to Union House is also pretty dire for disabled students, with its tiny archaic lift being on the whole unusable. The events the Union regularly organises in the LCR (poster/CD/clothes sales etc .) are usually sited either in the ' pit' or on the stage, both inaccessible! Upon entering the LCR you see a plethora of blue plaques stating that discrimination on the grounds of race, gender, religion , sexual orientation, and disability is not acceptable to the SU -which all seems very 'Michael Jackson ' however (again like Michael Jackson) this soon proves a little false . Once the lights go out, the band comes on stage> and everybody around you stands up, you discover that there isn't anywhere that you can go, in a wheelchair, to safely see what is happen ing on stage.

The discrimination to which I refer isn't always as blatant, but is just as pernicious, maybe even more so, in the way that it weaves silently through the fabric of an institution.

Claustrophobic isn't an adequate enough word to describe the experience, particularly when your way is blocked at every turn by a wall of bodies, or to be more precise, bottoms (when you are at a seated level). I have spoken to the equal opps. rep. about th is, but her response was similar to that of the Entertainment Manager - one of apathy betraying a hidden 'why don 't you just stay at home then?' attitude. To me, financial concerns are :>bviously overriding issues of discrimination . There was a makeshift ' platform' for wheelchair users the last time I went to the LCR, but this was segregation at its worst (or best?): no ramp up to it, no companions allowed on it, and no leaving it to move freely about (for drinks, loo etc .) until everybody else had left! Now it isn't as if 'we' are asking to be treated specially, just equally - i.e. the same as everybody else - the same access, the same view, the same opportunities, the same respect. Now you may think this all just sounds like a bit of a whinge, and you may be right. But just imagine you had somebody, or something, con tinually preventing you from participating in everyday life, due to any discernible difference that you may have (colour, gender, sexuality etc.) . Unfortunately the discrimination to which I refer isn't always as blatant as that, but it is just as pernicious, maybe even more so, in the way that it weaves silently through the fabric of an institution, undetected, gradually overcoming those it comes into contact with. I graduate this year (hopefully), and I want to participate in the graduation ceremony on equal terms (i.e. go onto the stage to collect my scroll when my name is called , and depart it with my fellow graduates). But if I want to do that, I have another fight on my hands, as currently this isn't possible for a wheelchair user- apparently I have to use a back entrance. I won't accept this, unless, of course, that is the way everybody else is doing it. But perhaps this is grimly appropriate : for a wheelchair user at UEA, the battle is very much from start to finish . ~

Want to comment on anything in Concrete? Email su.concrete@uea.ac.uk .. "-w"""

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The news that this year's Summer Ball will take place in the middle of a crowded exam period is a problem that students could have done without. Already weighed down by facing examinations for modules undert-aken inthe Autumn semester, and also the possibility of six hours of exams in one day, robbing students of the traditional end-of-year knees up is the last thing required. In the Union's defence, it is unfortunate that this is the only date available. But considering the amount of money that students plough into this event, it is a shame that many will have to get up Monday morning bleary-eyed and hungover only to face questions on lectures and seminars taken up to nine months earlier. However, news that the Union are offering alternatives when it comes to the Graduation Ball is much more positive. Concrete's motion to provide funding for the event must be taken seriously: this is the culmination of three years' hard work and a final goodbye, and the idea that Union money is put aside for such an occasion is not an unreasonable one. Despite the proposed changes coming too late for the class of 2002, hopefully in future UEA's graduates will have an event to be proud of and a farewell to savour.

Sexed up The revelation that 25% of U EA's male students have sex daily or more may come as something of a surprise. EspeCially, it has to be said, to the women - of whom only 13% lay claim to such regular carnal pursuits. The question that has to be asked is who those men are having sex with every day: other men, local women, animals, or themselves? The public have a right to know- but admittedly may not want to. Answers on a postcard please.

Washed out The social life in Norwich may not be up to much but things must have reached a pretty sorry state if students are having to hang out in tumble dryers to get their kicks. A word of warning though: if you are intent on climbing inside and timing how long you can last remember two things. Firstly, make sure you do it on sensitive. If the sex survey is anything to go by, shrinkage is the last thing you all need. And secondly, add Bounce. Not only will it stop you from attracting unwanted socks but it will also leave you smelling summer fresh for days to come. â&#x20AC;˘â&#x20AC;˘

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FOCUS

www.concrete-on line.co.uk

Concrete WEDNESDAY , F EBRUARY 13, 2002

"The pimps get the girls addicted to crack. Some of them can use £800 worth in 24 hours. Then they have to work to pay the debt off." Prostitution may be the oldest profession in the book, but few people are aware of the proliferation of prostitutes addicted to crack, working the streets of Norwich. And while the shadows of the Red Light District may seem a world away from UEA's campus, a recent study has linked student debt with prostitution . Jo Locke reports

he rain has stopped at last but the freezing wind still pulls at your clothes. Cars rev but all you can hear is your own breathing. You would go home, bu t yo u have n' t earned enough yet to buy tom orrow 's hit But then tomorrow doesn't bear thinking about The brutal murder of 23 year-old Hayley Curtis, a Norwich prostitute , who disappeared from t he Mile Cross area last October, has brought th e dangers of prostitution back into the limelight Police Sergeant Fry of Norfolk Police , who deals wit h vice issues since t he disintegration of the Vice Sq uad, has been working on this case since her body was recovered in early January. He admits t hat wh ilst there are concerns about the safety of the sex workers, an increase in violence is hard to quantify. " We probably only see the tip of the iceberg m terms of street violence in Norwich, " Fry expl a1ns. " The girls especially don't report many of the crimes they experience. There have been many cases of rape and assault involving sex workers, but most see daily violence as part of the terr itory." "There have been some very vicious anima l rapes and assaults. it's a very dangerous business," agrees Theresa Cumbers, Project Director of the Magdalene Group , a charitable organ izati on offering support to prostitutes in Norwich . "A ll of the girls have been raped at least once in the ir working Iives, " she adds. The Magdalene Group is an inter-denomina tiOnal Christian organization that was started ten years ago by Norwich Magistrate Doreen Belts. "We are here to encourage them , to care and support t hem , to love them unconditionally, and demonstrate our faith through our actions not words, " explains

Theresa . Research trips to Amsterdam and Dublin have resulted in a support group and drop-in centre based at St Peter Parmentergate Church , on King Street in t he Red Light District But it's a slow process to win t he women's tru st "The girls are very reluctant to come into the sitting room because they're losing money and they risk getting beaten up by their pimps or partners, " highlights Theresa. " Most of the girls don 't want to work out there ," she continues. "Many of them have had sexual abuse, and spiritual abuse, some th rough satanic rituals an d witchcraft. Behi nd t he masks t hey put on are hurting litt le gi rls." She recall s t he story of

"I want to get on a script so I can do things with my kids. I don't want them to see me like this." just one of her c I ients she has encountered t hrough her work in the City. "There was a girl some years ago who was coerced into prostitution at 13 yea rs old . Her mother died and her father threw her out, and she got pregnant by a pimp who made her go out and work . Wh en she went into labour, he made her service three punters. She pleaded with him to get her to hospital and when sh e got there the baby had died ." Whilst girls this young are unusual , Theresa

flad a very sheltered cMd!lood and ~ing a ~itute c~a· ~1 wasn't

'~rt. of my'thildb0()4" ..of:.wllat I'B be when I grew up Home } at I6 years old and m8iiied my sweetheart sbortly before my 20th birt!lday, but untortunirtiJY he died less than six years later from a rare and crippling bone disease~ I knew that he wa$ ill when we married, blir r loved him arid wantEKkus to have children rogeflfer.l nursed him on thbed, and after lie • away f lonely. I continu~d sup. pOrt o!l r dren and myself ~ '· in the . ice. lt was hard BO . . nclally and emotl'®ally, -especially as my chitdren were stifll(ery y After some years I dec1!1ed to ·join a · · p for the divorced and widowed as I w~ntedJo rneet new people and.t~, and pull

highl ights the emotional trauma experienced by some of the women who sell sex. "A women I knew who didn't want to work would go home and have a Savlon bath every time she had had a punter. She'd put so muc h Savlon in t hat bath it burnt her skin - beca use she says she felt so dirty and she just co uldn't get clean ."

he pol ice , in their bid to improve condi tions for prostitutes in Norwich , work closely with the local Heath Improvement Programme (H lP) and its Contact NR5 project, an NHS funded scheme that dea ls wit h t he sexual hea lt h and substa nce abuse of Norwi ch's sex workers. Every Thursday night, Contact NR5 runs an Outreach programme that supplies new needles and condoms to sex workers , while offering practical advice on safer sex and substance misuse . A night out with their min ibus soon highlights what life is really like for Norwich 's prostitutes, and shattered any illusions that may have existed about life in the East Anglian sex industry. The vast majority of t he wome n that we came into contact with were working to pay for their heroin habits. But t imes are changing fast on Norwich 's streets. Outreach has identified a steady increase in the number of women wh o are turni ng to crack for its short acting and intensely sat isfying high . The probl em is that crack has the strongest assoc iation with pimp culture and will make prosti tutes less receptive to the services provided by projects such as the Magdalene Group. Ad ditionally, the increase in crack on t he streets will result in more 'crack houses'- where the pimps and dealers operate . As Liz Bends from Contact NR5 explains: "The risk is that the pimps get the girls add icted to crack, and they bui ld up huge debts. Some of them can use up to £800 worth in 24 hours. They then have to work to pay the debt off while still using. it's a diffic ult culture to escape from. " Many of the women working in Norwich are from care homes and have reported being poached by pimps before they the age of 16 . With backgrounds of ch ild abuse and sexual abuse , and a limited education , the girls fall prey to a scene where low se lf-esteem , drug abuse and 'easy' money become entwined . A night out in th e Red Light Distri ct illuminates that the relationship boundaries between the women, the pimps and the partners is not so clearcut There are no goodies and baddies out there . There are a few of t he stereotypical pimps, but not all of them drive a flash car and wear sovereign rings on every finger. The women are usually pimped by their boyfr iend s and sometimes their husbands , and t hey work to pay for the ir joint hab it The partn ers keep 'look-out' for the women and keep in contact by mobile phone . Most of th e women have chi ldren who play some part in the ir lives. As one prostitute exp lained : " I want to get on a scri pt (Methadone prescription) so that I can do things wi th my kids. I don't want them to see me like this." The pimps aren 't the only ones who are watching out for the women at night - the poli ce also patrol the Red Light District. Off icers remove advertising cards from phone boxes and generally patrol the area . Prostitution in itself is not illegal ,

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Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

but soliciting and loitering with intent are. But while the police don't want to fine the girls, they are often left with little option. PS Fry explains: "We have to arrest the girls because we can't take action on one group and not the other. We give them a warning and if they're persistent and cause problems for residents we then arrest. The courts need to think of a different way of fining the girls, maybe curfews or compulsory help group atten dance would be more effective." Indeed, the fines imposed by the courts do little to prevent the women from working. As one prostitute highlights: "I've been arrested and fined about 80 quid, so I had to go straight out and earn the money to pay. Where else do they think I' m going to get it from?" The police also target the punters that curbcrawl for sex, and the deterrent factor has had huge effects. "The Special Constables take the registration numbers of the punters and send them warning letters. Most of them are married with good jobs and have a lot to lose," says PS Fry. But budgets increasingly prevent more action being taken to prevent prostitution. "it's a political thing at the moment because the government wants us to concentrate on burglary, street violence, and auto crime, and our budget next year depends on our success at beating these crime. Less time than ever before is being spent on vice issues. We just can't afford the staff."

' 'T

here's a market amongst punters for pregnant women and many of the workers continue to operate until their pregnancy reaches fullterm, " explains Debby Chedgey from Contact NR5 . "A lot of the women that fall

www.concrete-online.co.uk

"She got pregnant by a pimp who made her go out and work. When she went into labour, he made her service three punters. When she got to hospital the baby had died ." pregnant, mostly by their partners, don't have any antenatal care because they're frightened of social services getting involved. They don't want to see doctors for health-checks and if they do they feel that they can't say what they do for a living for fear of being judged." Then, women will often stop working - either because they' re no longer dependent on drugs and stabilized on a 'script' , or they find other ways of financing their habit. Occasionally, some decide that they're strong enough to escape the vie ious cycle of drug addiction, relationsh ip problems and violence. Theresa reca lls one girl who decided enough was enough. "I worked with one girl who was 17 and she was a very heavy heroin addict. Her pimp used to inject her - he would never allow her to inject herself - and I worked with her for two years, never thinking that she'd make the break. Then one day she came in here, locked the door behind her, and said, 'I' m ready to go'. 'He's out there, he thinks I'm with a punter. I want to go, I've had enough - I' m going to die if I don' t go'. We were able to get her out of Norwich within 10 m inutes and back to her family. I think, knowing we

were here, she came at the time when she was ready." hile the streets appear to be free of full-time students for the time being, with the rising cost of a university education the danger is that students could find themselves dragged into such a cycle. Recent studies at Leeds University indicate t hat 60% of Leeds' prostitutes are students who can't pay their way. Or Ron Robert, formerly of Westminster University and a researcher on student debt, is worried. "We've found that debt was linked to students becoming involved in criminal act ivity, drug dealing and prostitution, just so they can support themselves financially. For a Labour government that has prided themselves on social justice and equality it is embarrassing." Here in Norwich, there are unconfirmed reports that UEA students are working at a lap-dancing club in Norwich's city center. As Theresa explains, "We've heard that there's more going on there than lap-dancing from some of our clients, but the uni-

FOCUS

versity won't want people knowing about it." lt may be that girls working there are safe despite not earning a conventional living, but what is obvious is that the route to prostitution is a slippery slope. Talk on the street is of another girl that may have disappeared. Debby and Liz say that recently there's always been someone t hey're concerned about. With the recent murder of their long-term client Hayley Curtis, and the possible links to the disappearance 19 months ago of another prostitute, 29-year-old Kellie Pratt (still missing from Norwich), Contact NR5 are ever aware of the dangers posed to Norwich's prostitutes. The death of 16-year-old prostitute Natalie Pearman, who was found strangled 10 years ago in the Ringland Hills area of Norwich, is still unsolved. lt's hard to find any truth in the shadows of the Red Light District. The women lead highly chaotic lives and don't trust anyone. They tell you their story but you can never be sure that it's true. There are many sad stories, but the girls are manipulative by nature. They will be what you wa nt them to be. They get paid to please, to create your fantasy. Maybe they are all frightened little girls beyond the fa~ade of the hot and horny brunette, or the slim and sexy blond. But they know what you want to hear. They always practice safe sex. They never reuse needles. They don't take risks with punters. And they won't get murdered; it'll happen to some one else.

If you are interested in volunteering for the Magdalene Group, call 01603 610256 If you want to talk to someone about prostitution or substance abuse calf. Debby or Liz confident[ally at the HIP project on 01603 746750

Ll FESTYLE

www.concrete-online.co.uk

Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

Ll FESTYLE

www.concrete-onl ine.co.uk

Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

•

I From Marmite sex with Janet Street-Porter to the rather obvious night of passion with Brad Pitt, we size up the sexual antics of UEA in the annual Concrete sex survey. Adam Chapman was sickened

Women Sexual orientation: Heterasexual: 9 1.5% Homosexual: 2.1% Bisexual: 6.4%

Relationship status: Single: 50% Attached: 50%

Percentage of virgins: Yqlns: 3.5% ou like to have sex. That much is c lear. Who knew, however, that you liked to have it in such a variety of places and ways? From the girl who said size didn't matter and then went on to c ite her worst sexual experience as "the boy who hadn't yet developed anything downstairs" to the guy whose partner turned into a werewolf during sex (LSD induced), the third annual Concrete sex survey had it all. Sex with Janet StreetPorter (although I suspect this was one of many excursions into territory we like to call lying). Incontinence caused by anal sex. Ferrets. You name it, I had to read about it. Perhaps the most interesting aspect of this year's survey was how little the sexes seem to rate each other. The men scored 4 out of 10 while the women fared only slightly better in the looks department. Intelligence just passed the halfway mark and fidelity wasn't high for either men or women; you don't seem to like each other very much. But, like a sailor at sea wi th a boat full of sweaty tattooed bunkmates you seem to have made the best out of a bad situation. How? Well, if the number of partners you've had at UEA is anything to go by you 've dropped your everso-high standards and shagged your average-looking,

sexually-underachieving, unfaithfu l, dim counterparts nonetheless. What's more, you think you 're good at doing it. Sadly, it would appear these are merely delusions of grandeur: UEA men rated their sexual prowess as 7 .4 out of 10 while the women gave them four. The girls were slightly more realistic, rating themselves 5.7, just slightly over the score awarded them by the men. Despite the fact that you don't seem to actually like each other on an aesthetic level the majority of you went for personality over anything else. Rather less shallow than the rest of your answers would seem to suggest but commendable all the same. I guess personality is important when you aren't exactly spoiled for choice in the looks department. You aren't averse to some outdoor activity either with campus being a veritable hotbed of sexual activity - especially for those who wish to display all and sundry on top of Waveney Mountain. The rooftop of Nelson Court, the LCR toilets, the library, and the lake - all have seen some carnal action. Top marks though to the guy who had a sexual epiphany in the Chaplaincy. And to the girl who went a l ittle further afield, preferring the rooftop of the Mexican Embassy to the dreaming spires of the Arts building. There were two distinctly d isturbing features to our

You've dropped your ever so high standards and shagged your average-looking, sexually underachieving, unfaithful, dim counterparts.

highly scientific survey. The first was the number of people who have had a sexually transmitted disease (15.5% of men and 5.4% of women). Add to this t he fact th at more t han half of men and almost half of women have had unprotected sex at some point in the ir lives and you have a situation that doesn't take a degree in biology to understa nd. Or maybe it does. Just consider the man who got a disease in his mouth from "some inbred at Time". Let that be a lesson to you all. The second point is less disturbing, more curious. That men masturbate is a given. That 42.6% of women don't is just plain wrong. The fact that 35% of women aren't happy with their bodies would seem to suggest that they can 't bear to touch themselves (you know, down there). That or they are part of the lucky 13% who get sex daily and don't need to. Which leaves me with two gri evances. One is the

How often you get sex: Dafly: 13.8% FeW times a week: 39.4% WeeJdr. 8.5% MontbiJ: 11.7% Few times a year: 22.3% Never: 3.2%

high illiteracy of UEA males (which I can only put down to your poor eye-sight or the fact that the pen keeps slipping out of your hairy palms. That or basic literacy is not important at university). The other is the amount of people who had to have the term 'felch ing' explained to them. One last time: it means having newly-deposited sperm sucked out of your anus/vagina. Sound pleasant? Well, not as pleasant as having to explain what it meant over and over again to half of those surveyed. Oh, and to the member of the cheerleading society with genital warts, th rush and cystitis (or the funny person who filled it in on your behalf) I think you need medical attention, especially as you seem to also be a prostitute, animal molester and have an unhealthy collection of sex aids. I thank you for the experience. My vow of cel ibacy starts here.

Best of the rest: sexual experiences, extremes & more ...

Average no. of sexual partners: 8.6 people

Worst sexual experience "My first time - I got taken advantage of on GCSE results night (v. pissed) and ended up in a back street somewhere." "Teeth in a blow-job." "Fucking my boss (tiny penis) and later finding out his girlfriend was pregnant at the time." "The time I went down on the guy I was seeing and his genitalia was less than clean. Let's just say you could hav.e made a sandwich with what was down there." " Being caught on camera in our pub beer garden and tnen having it played on Bank Holiday weekend to a full pub. I died."

Best sexual experience "On LSD and I thought she was a werewolf."

The most extreme lengths gone to get sex ~~Queuing

al l day at Gare Du Nord to get a Eurostar ticket and just getting the last tra in to Norwich, arriving about 2am. Only to find my girlfriend puking into the toilet."

"Anal sex- I pooed myself all over the floor afterwards."

"Having a ferret up my bottom ."

"With a girl who thought she was a porn star - kept scratching."

"When my boyfriend found my clitoris. Miracle I thought!"

"When I split my foreskin during sex."

"69-er with dildos. I felt like a right dirty bitch."

"Ask nicely."

"Filling out this survey."

"In a shower in Waveney."

"Lied and said I'd go out with her."

"Young girl who claimed that she was a virgin. Too tight. lt hurt."

"Receiving oral sex in the bath and having mu lt iple orgasms."

"Blow jobs with ice are good. Blow jobs with crushed ice hurt like tuck and mess your dick up." "Listening to my mum and uncle."

"First orgasm. you just can'_t beat it." "Sex on my mum's car in t he middie of the night."

" Lied about having six toes. She said that did it for her."

3) Robbie Williams 4) Jude Law

5) Orlando Bloom (below)

Average age women lost their virginity: 15 Masturbation frequency: Daily: 5.3% Few times a week: 13.8% Weekly: 16.9% Monthly: 9.6% Few times a year: 12.8% Never: 42.6%

2 incbes: 0% 4 incbes: 0% 6 lAches: 26.6% 1 Inches: 18% 8 Inches: 27.6% 10 Inches: 3.2% oa.t't IMlter: 24.6%

Women who have had an STD: 5.4%

Preferred position: On top: 44.6% Missionary: 27% 69: 10.3% Spoons: 6.6%

DoaJ: 6.4% Standinc up: 2.6% Man on top: 0.5%

One • t stands: None: 8%

A few: 44.6% 5-10: 34% OVer 10: 13.4%

Oral ,. .., or receive?

litli.iawrnc: 64% Receiving: 72% PersonaiiJ: 68.5% l.oobt6%

"Decided that after two years of pretending I had high standards, I fi nally bit t he bullet and shagged one of t he many UEA mingers."

1) David Boreanaz (above) 2) Brad Pitt

Average no. of sexual partners at UEA: 4.3 people

Ideal penis size: "I swear he didn't know the difference between a vagina and an anus."

Celebrities most women want to sleep with:

Stllb 23r. $wallow: 56% Pub: 21%

" Straight" women tempt· ed by same sex: 35%

MESSAG ES

www.concrete-onli ne.co.uk

Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

••

Ill''-" O'fi

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w).~~~~~® ~e rf~ttl<JJ~~ tb express how you fe~J~ 1·E1;:the people of lJ;E~. ~;pef it's how ,m _ucJ~l ~Qt~ '- hat~(va:lentine's p a){,,;\i'ouf, fov~. ~B:uY you IJ - o:, [ ,, 'ff' /'/ l'' 1 r . .,.Tt t~Jft,, Thom Harlec..nr ';""'\ -- ;;;"~ @tjf \. 1

are the ob~ct of aff~ption, this ~age ~owltP .c ha oge your life. Or not. I- J'f)/.•1'' I pti·. ,tf.t,. ':. fr t ;:::i' . t ,. V ~ . ~...~_., L I

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UEA as much as I love myself - you' re

Dan, Wednesday nights won't be the same without you.

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all beauti ful! Rene - I wish you weren' t in France.

To my sexy goddess Rachel. I love you and can 't wait for Valentine's Day evening! Love Steve.

Carl Banham is the sexiest guy I know. A blowjob would be the least I could do as long as he doesn't mind me being a hairy rugby player.

Them Harle ... You have changed my life in so many ways. Please say you' ll marry me.

·-

Pervy Chris. Love ---

Da rli~,

To Jo, Cathy, Usa, Kim. Sweet loving to you all! Rico. Happy Valentine's Day to my best friend and soul mate. You know who you are because you were texting when I wrote this. R. If loving you is wrong I don't wanna be r ight. Rxxx

To my Welsh beauty, I won't stop for any reason, especially that one!! All my love Ron

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Emma, my fantasy came true the day you became Comms Officer and I could enjoy a whole extra year of feeling you up in the LCR.

Thom Harle - I love you with all my heart. Love sexy.

sexyE's~~·r. from special

bunny.

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60-average boy, I lot (Y!u more than hot cross buns. Love me.x Hollyoaks boy - why don't you wo(k in

T~ Doreen All my loving and stli(J\ l \:\ }

Trevor - Why did you lie to me? I'm waiting with my iron 'cause you never called. Beware the badgers. Mo

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a day Kxxxx

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Luke is the best per~~1tph~e world and I love him ~~ Oiuch - Simon

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Terry, roses are red, vihlt~fatd blhe:-'1 wanna stick my poker 6/~bu!{love LGB member

,,.vi4"'' Waller , you are my Arwen. Love "'Aragonxxx

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1o my girls, its already been a year 1 f 4nd we all know a ~~~Prt~ppened; K-holes, bed-Hr~J-t'Purne[j and bum -

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To the Adidas girl in the library From the boy with ginger hair My 'glasses steam up Just thinking of you And I follow you evT here.

Jackie You know

Danny Murphy, you're like a ;()n I' ll neile~o/~ ypyr custa'~l:e~9"· me, if it was down tp..;~ l'd bU~;'6'0Uf..J~ \.,: ... / . ticket to the Far Ea~::f· . e ;( ~mon ... we loooove':unuuuu! ' ,.. i -:-r '{., -'~' 1'1.y-~ Cookie · r..0 r. } ~"~C,/ ·· ~""/: J, stop stallfiJI{.I,lil:!. I don't lfke )Id).I. Titus, Hermann, and Marcus- than~ r;; .' · - ?'), ·(/ for all the pleasure you've brought us. · ~ we've made it- iQsj! Still love From your fiercely heterosexual you &'"etj.tffier all th is ti;;( ~~.P.9 Norwich admirers always wiii ..Jfla;,er happepj)'Sx

Andy V, we never thought about being homosexual, but you cou ld change all that. Love PO & WB

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To my dear..'Ajldy Pandy, I wo~ld take "'.Af;eaiJy, rea![~dl Love ChrfMina x

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AI, that paisley pantage ,Prive?'us mad - keep it up! ~

Technical girl from Photosoc committee - be my Valentine?

Rachel BroW(I

cor,.-~...,...

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and C.

I am 22 years old and am writing anotftmous messages. Can I not pluck up the courage to tell her how I feel ?

To the Fucking Inst itution. Than ~~for '/-'= making the last few weeks at UEA ' , ,., Loverboy, y(5u're sexy. I want to shag (and sex) the best ever. Liw'e you YD\!' h4ge c~~ ight. Call be baby, always, your'byoeractive giriY,J}t-tits ~eLfy.,..... ·'\?-~ 1 ~· XXXXX (J / . / c· •

To my library boy, I love you 68%, but is that enough for you?

I love you lots and I want to go "mushunti ng" with you forever, your Angel.

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John, mine's a clean license, yours is d1fty,.Aha! G

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Kev -Thanks for the lasv l8 months. / "' , •J You mean the world to me. Love you "?..,;... · ,? Terry - bring more champagne. The Valentin~'s Day sucks. I know I'm bitalways. Kel xxx . , " ,; . To the!~hlity Twins, lj~Y Coo l_ ter but l1ke I care. Who wants those { :::: _ ;..,... ,.,- Water oaf wpen we're alone, JUSt wa1t flowers are th irsty. tucking awful teddy bears from Clinton Robbie G, your freestyfin;l d6 vtl_S m_ e ........"ii~ ~ur _h ous~8J,e.§ ain't around ... . Cf~'Zft{love you lots and ltp~misho \._ ' , !/ cards anyway? Commer~~~ bullshit. • • I tl) 1: (/ you tuck me up t he arse on f , \(ellirer, your all, I've never 1" Mik?t t~allf< yo'Lftbf a 'great t wb years. Valent ine's day. E ~" \ it so ge()~_..,l'm looking forward to "love always, Becca xxxx , ,flexing your mtfst'les, Donkey xx / ' 1 I' .•• I > ~ ]I(' -d'arling, I love you lots and I want to wey,, l?t 'r.!l t~nkl h n -singiE{. getting go "mushunting" with you forever, Jarrett, you look nicer than a parrot, ¥ou r Af!g~l. And you have quite a carrot but you older and you want me to come up with some catchy little ditty t'( fincafJ'-/ I.,. \ .·\ wi ll always be a second best to Swann sulate Vll epti ne'~- ~~Y fp' ~&meoner' Sandy, Because of his enormous schlong }S(iiclep.. Jireally aon't t fiink you would You may have left but it still means as All my Love, C xx print, ft - safe to say it is shit. Bitter I much as it did in the second year. Axx David Butler - What ever tomorrow may be but at least I' m not a mug. lt Happy V-Day Flat 16. brings you know that we stand. Love is for sad, pathetic would be ProzacE.M.U, popping middle-aged wet blankets. you, Janine. You are everything to me, you make Orta, do the washing up and I'll stop me real. leaving the top off the peanut butter. To my favouri test weirdo boyfriend. You fancy Janet Street-Porter but I Know that I will always be next to you, To my darling Katie and will always love you, You are. Love, me xx fancy you. If you want to find out r1 more, come up to the Concrete office. M.K.YXXX Stop messing around with all those To our darling Irish Billy -~~ [ uiJf, all sports club wankers and be my footLxx of our fantasies. We love ~. -H{RI:!,Z Modboy, sort it out. You like the baller's wife. xxx you have a wonderful V-Day. Love F ' / .:'~om Harle - I want your babies you

Hello Badger. Rx

K1sses Derek

' L Ruth, I love you. Phone llO}lle. E.T

tbJ! Pervitos

Batman and Robin, tak, ~s 'f6r a ride in your Batmobile. Love your three , Catwomen. { ('

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Budge.ns anymore? Take me to the Loft. Your indist inguishable blonde slapper.

This goes out to Kay: than; f tbr · Tuesday, I think we both had fun... Chris

C - you are fantastic in bed! N XXX

Chri stophe, vou lez.vous couc hez avec moi, ce soir? Niiicole

To a female badger, from your very own Ron Weasley... You can hop on my Nimbus 2000 any t ime...

Simon Benns, tie me up and beat me you animal! Love your little blonde deviant,. Kate xxxx

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a rug~ay1P.~\I Ben I usuai)Y-:P!Jlf ~lt~ · 15 men } ~ · r; good1ooking and rellOy ~t ~~) a Yafenti(lts 9~~ M ve not got Please help..rnF o'd tlof my dilemma • Anc;l.,~ pr~ to make you tre.m9{

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th•~& {Wlairls...you guys are

) uke Kavanagh, I' ll be your Q.T Your secret lecture lover xx Barry, Stuart and John, You can be our Valentine any t ime. Lots of love, the Concrete girls xxx

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www.concrete-on Iine.co. uk

Concrete WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 30, 2002

INSIGHT

Nightmare season for the single, smug contentness for the attached - but what do all those Valentine's cards actually mean? Will Halsey enlisted the help of a psychologist to find out

here are two issues when choosing Valentine's Day cards," says UEA psychologist Beth Neil. "What you want to say about yourself, and what he or she will react best to." Yep, it's that time of year again, when the postman never knocks twice and pigeon-holes are furtively checked at least twice a day. But if you're sending any cards this year, it's wise to choose them carefully- they may reveal more than you think. "lt won't be random what people pick," SWK lecturer Beth continues. "They will be thinking about what the card says about themselves, but they will also be thinking about what the person they're sending it to want to think they're like." If that sounds complicated, it should do. A lot more goes into choosing a Valentine's Day card than meets the eye, and UEA is a veritable hotbed for card-sending at this time of year. "Valentine's

Day is popular with students," confirms Tina Wilsea, Assistant Manager of the Union Post Office. "We've ordered 800 to 1000 cards thrs ye~r, and last year we sold out of our 500 cards completely. There's always a last-minute rush." Of course, in many ways, that's the way it should be. A last-minute thought, a sly wink here or there - but it's worth remembering that you can tell a lot more about someone from the card they send you than you first think. "You can't quite pin it down to what card they choose, but people do operate in different ways

when it comes to relationships," explains psychologist Beth. "Some people are very preoccupied with relationships, it's something they think about a lot and give priority to, and Valentine's Day would be a big deal. "Other people view relationships dismissively, and see themselves as getting through life quite selfreliant. They might be afraid of relationships, and they won't go over the top on Valentine's Day. They might be quite frightened to even receive a card, because it would mean someone is being quite forward and intimate with them."

"lt's easy to see who's flirting, but you don't always know you're doing it.''

hould you be blessed with an anonymous card on the day in question, though, it may be easier than you think to identify your secret crush. If it's someone from a lecture or seminar, keep an eye on their behaviour at the next available opportunity- whoever sent the card will almost certainly give it away. Prolonged eye-contact, when someone holds your gaze for a couple of seconds longer than normal, is a giveaway, as is anyone sitting closer to you

Happy Valentine's Day (left) Price: £1.30 Inside message: blank Our psychologist says: "it's actually very unexpressive, there's nothing personal about it. it's possibly saying 'it's Valentine's Day and I have to send you a card', although it could be quite sweet. Maybe this would be sent by somebody who wants some space within the card to say what they want to say. it's quite bland and minimalist, it's not saying anything soppy or sexy. The kind of person who chose this might well be quite confident in finding their own words. The card cou Id reveal the person who sent it is the most tedious person on the planet, but if they wrote something funny, it might win you round. " Student reaction: "it's very girly, I think it's more for serious relation ships. I wouldn't send it, I'd send something funnier." (Sarah LAW 4)

Violets Are Blue (right) Price: "1.40 Inside message: Sod all that, let's go to bed Our psychologist says: "I think this card is from someone who is a bit scared of being soppy. it's possible that whoever sends this might be dismissive of soppiness, but it's likely they are very interested in soppiness but are worried that the other person will think. I think this is an elaborate double bluff - this is someone who really is very affectionate and loving towards someone, but they're not sure how the other person feels, and are worried they might be put off by coming on too strong. All of these are trying to balance the affectionate content and the sexual content- and doesn't want to go one way or the other. Because to commit either way is pretty scary." Student reaction: "I think this is really sweet, I'd like it if so(lleone sent this to me. it's quite funny and women are always I looking for someone with a sense of humour." (Nasia LAW 4)

than you might usually expect. If they mirror your body posture, lean forward, and touch you more than is necessary you've probably got your man - or woman. "Everybody does it, but you don't always know you're doing it" says Beth. "If you go down to the bar it's easy to see who's flirting, but it's not a conscious thing, you don't think to yourself 'I'll mirror his or her body posture."' Ultimately, Valentine's Day will always be a bit of fun - or misery, depending on your luck - and a fantastic marketing opportunity for Hallmark. The card you send may have Iittle or every effect on your valentine, but bear in mind the deeply psychological warning on offer: "I think if I received one of the majority of Valentine's Day cards, and I found out who sent it, I would have to terminate that relationship," says Bet h. "I'd be more amenable to a large bottle of champagne."

Teddy bear (right) Price: £1.40 Inside message: ... And great to sleep with Our psychologist says: " it's a bit soppy isn't it? But slightly risque inside. it's not going full-on for sexual content, though - it's quite a babyish, cute image. The person who sends this may be a bit uncomfortable with their sexuality- they may want experiment with a more sexual side but are quite afraid of doing it. They feel more at home on the cute cuddly ground. Whoever receives this might feel a bit sick when they see the front cover - it's nauseating, although they may be slightly mollified by the inside sexual frisson. They may forgive the sender - and presumably it will be from someone they have slept with, although you could annotate the inside message. it's a bit of a mixed message - they want to say 'I'm a bit sexy' while also drawing back, saying this is a cuddly, fluffy thing." Student reaction: "I'd be a little worried if someone sent this to me, I wouldn't particularly like it." (Jacqui Lee HIS 3)

Inside message: Happy Valentine's Day Our psychologist says: "lt says 'Horny little devil' but there's nothing sexy about it. it's really bland, and there's nothing devilish about the devil. There's no edge. If the person is going to send this to someone to tell them they think they are a horny devi I, the problem is that it isn't very sexy. it's almost trying to diffuse the sexual content whilst also raising the idea. The devil, though, is hanging on to a heart- which could be quite sweet and endearing. I think you 'd send this to someone you really quite liked and wanted to have a relationship with, rather than just a flippant thing." Student reaction: " I'd feel the person who sent this was a little bit tacky, and a little bit sad. I wouldn't send it myself." (Caroline Crane EAS 3)

Cl~vi/

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LOOK

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Concrete

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY

13, 2002

Love is in the air so to accompany it we provide you with a sample of what underwear there is on offer this season . Whether you want something fun, sexy or revealing, the following are just a suggestion of something altogether more interesting.

Top left: A/ex wears black bra (£3.99) and G-String (1.99) from Hennes. Centre right: A/ex wears red retro twin-set. Top (£4.99) and knickers (£3.99). Bottom right: Harry wears red and white boxer shorts (£8) from Gap. A/ex, same as above. Above and bottom right: Alex wears red basque and G-String (£98) both from La Dolce Vita. Harry wears red lycra boxer shorts (£3.99) from Gap. Models: A/ex Widern and Harry Scrymgeour. Photogr: phers: Ed Webb-/nga/1 and C/aire Burwe/1. Stylist: Kat Realff.

LOOK

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Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

•

Ever wondered if your outfit actually makes a difference? We took one girl and one LCR to see if different clothes actually helped her pu ll her ideal man . Our subject wore two different looks to the same LCR to see what works. By Kat Realff.

Made-up:

Casual:

Daisy's view:

Initially, when I was asked to go to the LCR in two different outfits, I immediately felt that there would be now difference in my pulling potential. Well ... I was wrong. I would never believe the different type of men that I could attract when wearing two completely different looks. Firstly I wore the traditional 'Little Black Dress' . Although slightly too classy to wear to the LCR, I felt far more 'on show' and not as comfortable. This may have been due to the fact that it drew more attention from the wandering eyes of the male species. One rugby-type lad actually kept stopping me to tell me how sexy it was. This obviously gave me a huge confidence boost, and I began to enjoy myself more.

When it was time to change into the more casual outfit, I approached the rugby type for a second time, but this time was completely ignored let alone recognised. But to tell you the truth he didn't really do it for me either so I wasn't too upset. Generally I felt far more relaxed in this outfit, I felt I could be myself, relaxed and able to dance and talk to people. However, it was far easier to flirt in the sexy dress. To be moralistic I think we should all believe that it is what's in the inside that counts, my heart that is and not inside my dress.

Stylist comments: At first Daisy seemed a little shy in this outfit. Although she looked beautiful it is a little different to what she would normally wear to the LCR . But for attracting the men, it definitely worked . As I stood from afar I noticed the effect Daisy had on men as she glided by. She literally stopped them in her tracks. She seemed to attract a certain type of man, though - the louder, more confident type - rugby lads, city types and the real players (or so they seemed to think - alcohol bringing about a major attack of delusions of grandeur}. Boys of a more nervous disposition seemed quite intimidated by her look while the girls looked a little green-eyed. Definitely a winner, but maybe not for making new friends or for establishing a long-term relationship. And, of course, this is what the LCR is for- meeting your soulmate, settling down, buying a Land Rover and raising Labrador puppies in Surrey. But who needs a little black dress for that? All you need is a Barbour jacket and a pair of Hunter wellies. At least you'd have some protection from the vomit-ridden LCR floor.

Stylist comments: lt was obvious that everyone felt far more com fortable with Daisy and this look. Not only were guys still attracted to Daisy but they would actually and ... wait for it, chat to her rather than staring straight at her cleavage or feeling her bum. Which apparently were the perks of the other outfit (according to Daisy}. Guys still stopped her and commented on how lovely she looked. The style was natural yet still sexy. However, t he rugby types didn't even seem to pay any attention to the girl they couldn't keep their hands off before. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing let's face it.

Result: We were both amazed at the different responses from the men at the LCR . She got more drinks bought for her by dressing sexy, however she danced more with guys and felt far more comfortable with herself when dressed casually. In this experiment Daisy was a win er by just being natural, but it's always fun and useful to glam up and flaunt it, if you are on the pull it definitely works, especially if you want to avoid the Morgan/Kat from Eastenders look currently doing the rounds at the LCR .

cohcrata Meetings every Monday, 1pm Room 1. 33 Union House

..~.~·....,.»...-~.......

Above: LCR subject, Daisy Gruney in smart and casual mode.

Competition: Face of the future

TOPS OP TOPMA Topshop /Topman have teamed up with Models 1 for the third year to bring you one of the industry's most definitive modelling competitions, '2002 Face of the Future'. Aimed at 16-24 year olds, the competition scouts later this month. Scouting tours and regional finals follow in March and April. This-will eventuallyresult in twenty overall finalists taking the stage at the catwalk final. Two lucky winners are given the opportunity to sign up to Models 1 and receive a large cash prize and a Topshop/Topman clothing allowance. Wannabe models can either enter the competition by picking up an entry form at Topshop or mailing it to Models 1. Good luck to everyone wanting to take part.

- -fgr-moJe.detailsr coR tact (su .concrete@uea.ac.uk}.

Kat-a~ GoRGI'et&- -

COFFEE BREAK

www.concrete-on Iine.co. uk

• • •

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Celebrity Aquarius Elijah Wood January 28, 1981

Cancer

it's time for you to forget about something that 's been bugging you for months. If it's love trouble , rule them out for fuckw ittage . If it's your mates then give them a swift kick where the sun don't shine. Don 't just sit there on you r watery behind and take whatever these nasty people throw at you. Neptune th is fortnight is going to make you more powerful and wonderful than you ever imagined. Then you ' ll show them.

•

Concrete WEDNESDAY , FEBRUARY 13 , 2002

litAquarius

f.J

Just when you thought the party season was done and dusted, here comes this fortnight t o keep your social calendar choc-a-b lock. Mercury enters the fifth third of your sign on Thursday wh ich shou ld see your doorstep loaded with invites to fanc y shindigs, however if yo ur are one of the more unfortunate Aquarian recluses then it's best to stick with what you know, namely sitting at home with your hands down your pants. When Mercury leaves like it arrives, abruptly and noisily then you may find yourselves feeling a little deflated. The skies suggest you take a Iittle time to work out what you enjoy. Visit friends who you've overlooked recently, I predict huge reco nc iliation and the reviva l of a · forgotten partnership. Then you can go home happy. Then you can sit at home and put your hands down your pants.

it's all very well that you have this fantast ic new hea lthy regime, but to be perfectly honest with you it's pissing your friends off somethi ng rotten . Skin tight vests and teeny tiny shorts do not a Geoff Capes make. lt might be more benefi cial for you to stock up on hugely unhealthy items this fortnight, just to show you care for the poor fat bastards that surround you. A fry-up, a burger an d some cigarettes should do it. Well , if it worked for Elvis ...

Leo

t:J

Virgo

With Valentine's Day Oooh, you 'd better be drawing ever closer it's rea lly careful this fortnight. I've just stared time to pay some seriinto my crystal ball and ous attention to the it wasn 't pretty. Beware presents and cards the fog. you're about to send. I think the only way While the Iight of your life may claim they you can avoid tota l cathate expensive gifts it's astrophe is to worth noting that they completely change your are lyi ng. An alliance · identity. This might be with an Ar ies is getting at great personal cost but from what I've stronger and stronger. it might be even seen it can't be any stronger than that.if worse than what's · about to happen . The you spend a horren dous amount of money fog. The fog. Down, down, down into the on them . They are high-maintenance after grey misty pit of doom , lifeless. Faceless . all. And you ' ll get sex.

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•

Pisces

Libra

Aries

Wow, you rea ll y, really liked Pop Idol didn't you 7 Cal l me an astrologer ('cau se fun nil y enough that 's what I am) but I predict you'll be feeling a little like your life is com pletely worthless for the next co up le of weeks. A bit like the fee li ng you got after Brian won Big Brother. Lucki ly for you, the stars say it 'll pass. A new project is coming up th is fortnight that'\ I make yo u forget all about t he empty void that is your life . And yes, it is free money.

This fortnight you' 11 realise how completely rubbish your life is. You 'd probably neve r consi dered it until now but I'm afraid I'm going to have to force you here. Mars predicts success in an upcomi ng interview. You'll sh ine like a beacon above all the other applicants and the position is as good as yours. However, with the revelation that your life is shit hanging over you Iike a big black cross you 're not like ly to excel in your new surroundings. So quit.

.jJ Sagittarius

Just what exactly are you playing at? What are you trying to achieve? You can try and blame it on Mars but I know for a fac t that the moronic behaviour you've been indulging in is all your own fault. So how to undo t he damage? Wel l you cou ld sta rt with contacting those you've screwed over. Your chart is telling you to dial the number... that's right ... go on, then say "hello" and get yo ur head out of your arse . Then grovel.

Cupids bow has struck everyone except you, it would seem. Why do you hate Valent ine's Day so much? Oh yea h, I see, because you are a sad spinster. Well, for Sagittarians I prescribe casting aside your usual pickiness and getting your bottom off the sofa. You may have read about seducing gas men in porn mags (the only sex you get at the moment) , but love is NOT going to come knock ing on your door. Go chase it.

( ... i ~-~ nol; • .ID

Taurus

(.i,..c-... . , scorp1.o

T..l..T Blimey, you're chirpy aren't you? Your friends wi 11 be rei ieved that this is about to cha nge. Instead of being t he incredibly cheerf ul annoying person you usually are, you're going to become more gloomy than an afternoon at Lidl. Venu s is trying it 's best to make you into a reasonable human being but the stars might overrule it if you don't do your homework. Collect clippings of famous stars you aspire to, then copy the m.

~~1

'jGemini You Geminis are very lucky. I know these horoscopes might be a I itt le harsh somet imes but I' m glad to report that an unusua l align ment in you r chart is going to make the next co uple of weeks extremely enjoyable. lt wou Id be best for you to get out lots and have lots of fun with your friends and loved ones. If you stay at home and watch TV you' ll just be denying the public access to your winning smile and undoubtable charm . So go get 'em.

Capricorn

As with most other signs, you're in an awfu I lot of debt. However, what makes it doubly worse for you is the fact that try as yo u might, you cannot afford to pay it off. lt might be worth buying the local newspaper or getting a part-time job. A career in refu se co llection looks Ii ke ly. If you are simply too lazy to get a job then you should find out about loans. You'll have to pay them back with ridiculous interest but so what?

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LETTERS

Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR PO Box 410 · Norwich Fax 01603 506822

NR4 7TB Tel 01603 250558 E-mail su.concrete@uea.ac.uk

CONCRETE Issue 135 Editor Adam Chapman

Not-so-spec iaI relationship In response to Mr. Bogard us' intolerable essay on Amenca which appeared in Concrete Issue 134, one is never sure wh1ch of two characteristics is more prominent in the American national character and therefore of the greater significance: naivete or a supenority complex. When for example they say things about our region, our surprise at their ignorance is surpassed only by annoyance at their stupid insolence . The less they know about a matter, the more confidently they speak. They really believe that Europeans are eagerly waiting to hear from them and follow their advice. Their greatest technical accomplishments are refrigerators and rad ios. They cannot believe that there are cultural values that are the result of centuries of historical development, which cannot simply be bought. lt was no bad joke when , after the war, they bought the ruins of German castles and moved them stone by stone to the U.S .A. They really thought that they had purchased a piece of national history embodied in stone, and were naive enough to think that mocking laughter from Europe was respect for the wealth that enabled them to buy what their own tradition and culture lacked . The U.S .A. has no poets, no pa1nters, no architects or composers of world stature . Whatever culture it has IS borrowed from Europe. The land lacks its own language, culture and civilization. lt has borrowed everyth ing, generally debasing it by Americanizing it , never improvmg 1!. Americanization is a kind of kitsch1fication that gives every cultural value an American stamp, turn ing a mature language mto slang, the wa ltz 1nto Jazz, a work of literature into a crime story. We would not say anything if the U.S.A. were aware of its intellectual and moral defects and were trying to grow up. But 1t is too much when it behaves in an impudent manner toward a part of the earth with a few thousands years of glorious history behind it, attempting to teach it moral and intellectual lessons, whether out of innocence or a complete lack of genu1ne culture and learning. We can forg ive the mistakes of youth , but this degree of arrogance gets on one 's nerves. We have a level of culture and ci vilization that is den 1ed to most Americans . One who understands this can hardly have much sympathy for what they understand as culture and civil ization. Although we affirm the technical achievements of our age, we see behind them an intellectual strength that grows from the roots of our peopl e. Machines are a mean s to an end , not an end in themselves. As muc h as we apprec1ate the achievements of modern C1vil1zat1on and use them to improve life , we know that they are not the sole mean ing of l1fe . In the midst of the confusions of the day, we still have the ability to distingu ish truth from falsehood and gold from floss . We are not impressed by Amen can b1g talk and orgies of numbers. We know well enough that the trees do not grow as high as heaven on the other s1de of the Atlantic either. As far as God 's country goes, Europeans discovered 1! and give it Iife even today. Were it left to its own resources, it would soon return once more to desert and pra1rie, as wide and as empty as the souls of its people. Mark Geden ENVl

An insult to our graduates? UEA graduation is an insult! By now it may seem that the squabbles over the UEA graduation ceremony may have gone away, but I for one am still adamant to do something about it . Okay, so it's a new university, but the prestigious traditiOns of conferring degrees is not someth1ng which goes out of date with time. To enter into the world of Academ ia is not something that should be passed off with simple act. For many students, graduation is a sort of 'initiation' into a special world of the educated elite. Ultimately, how insulting is it that after being clad ih honourable robes, he is sent marching off to an old sports hall

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to get his reward after three or more years of hard work? lt is not only an insult to students, but also a direct insult to the entire world of Academ ia. I was extremely annoyed when I heard that the ceremony was in an 'old sports hall '. What made me more furious was that the hall was the basement of the Tyndall Centre. So not only are we insulted with a 'sports hall ', we are now insulted with what is real ly a 'school basement ' . I am not suggesting that we adopt Oxbridge's archaic but rather symbolic tradi tions, but I say that pomp and ceremony is an important and intrinsic part of the whole process of conferring degrees no matter where the university is or how young or old it may be . A start for UEA would be to hold the ceremony in a prestigious build ing that is adorned with the great history of Norwich , ideally the Cathedral. Indeed our motto may be 'do different', but with the graduation ceremony th1s motto most definitely should not apply. Khalid Miah LAWl

Unsafe I am a female student and as such am very aware of my safety, not only on campus but in the city as well. The suggest1on that the un iversity should employ a full-time police officer to deal with en me on campus is a good one. Sadly, though it is also unlikely that the university will listen to students on this 1ssue. You reported earlier in the year that security staff themselves were critic ising security arrangements at UEA, yet nothing seems to have happened . What are they waiting for? Someone to die? Name and addres supplied

exams in one day was huge , and I am disgusted that the un1vers1ty is considenng increas1ng this to six hours. I am sure every student is aware how exhausting an exam for one hour is. ·Concentrating for two hours in an exam is even more exhaustmg. And to put students through a possible six hours is ridiculous. As I was 1n my final year, I was incredibly stressed and had been diagnosed with depression . I am well aware that this is a common illness in the final year as work piles up and the pressure is high . The pressure of two exams in one day caused me to have a breakdown in the middle of the second exam , and unfortunately due to circumstances wh ich I'd rather not dwell on , I spent the night before my next exam (two days later) in hospital. I think those in charge of organ ising exam times sh ould be aware of the pressure put on us, which is unnecessary, and can cause severe problems to those who are already frag1le due to third year pressures. I am not suggest1ng that it is only third years who experience this problem . I am simply relating the issue bought up in Concrete to my personal experi ence. I don 'I think extending the exam times shou Id even be an option . lt is the university's responsibility to provide su1table facilitates for exams, irrespective of the building work which is going on (which I feel has disrupted us enough). Name and address supplied

The Event Editor Markland Starkie Deputy Editors Will Halsey Katie Hind Assistant News Editor Llz Hutchinson Fashion Editor Kat Realff Sports Editors Mike Milner Alex Thorpe Picture Editor Ed Webb-lngall Photographer Claire Burwell Proof Reader Ruth Charnock Advertising Manager Elm Jones Concrete rs publrshed by UUEAS Concrete Socrety ©200 1 Con crete. ISSN 1351 2 77 3

Corrections

Letters should be addressed for the atte nl ron of the Edrtor. Adam Chapman . Letters must rn c lude contact detarls. but we wrll consrder anonymous publrcatron. We reserve the rrght to edrt for length and c larrty as neccessary. Oprnrons expressed are not necessarrly those

A night to remember ... I was surprised to find , on return1ng to UEA as a postgrad , that th e grad ball now takes place 111 the LCR. For the record , the year I graduated, 1996, the ball was held at St Andrew's Ha ll, w1th a cas1no room , LCR -style music in th e ma1n hal l and (for the classically-minded) another room with a string quartet. Decent grub and free wine was served . All for a reasonable pn ce. lt was a brilliant even1ng, and I am nonplussed as to why it should have been changed, except on spurious cost grounds. So all power to Concrete's campa 1gn to change the venue; students now shou ld get the same deal we had. And whil e you 're about it , step up the pressure to get the graduatiOn venue changed too. The old sports hal l 1s cheap , tacky and unworthy of either the univers1ty or its students! Geoff Hicks HIS P/G

Six hours too many Having read the arti cle in issue 134 regard1ng the problem of exam space I wish to make a comment. Last year (when I was an undergraduate - I am now an M Se student) I had perhaps the worst second semester I have experienced . As 1t was the first year that they had sc heduled all the exams in the summer, my year were considerably apprehensive of such an approach. Maybe the main problem was the lack of experience we had with a large amount of exams in the summer at university level. However, I feel I am speaking for many students when I say that unnecessary pressure was placed on us. We were told that there had been six weeks set aside for assessment. However, being an ENV student, I think it was fairly obvious to us all that they would all be near the beginning. We were not told about our exam t1mes until after the Easter vacation , which caused con siderable uproar, because, as we pred1cted , all the exams were lumped together in two weeks , and I had two exams on the same day on the first day of the assessment week. This may have been just unlucky. However, I feel that the stress placed on me with four hours of

• lt was reported in the last issue that the AfroCaribbean Soc1ety were team1ng up with the Cheerleading Society for a UEA beauty pageant . This is not the case. They will both be organising events in April.

of the Publrsher or Edrtor. Use of the name T11e Event rs by arrangement wrth the copyrrght holders. Planet Zog Ltd. No part of thrs newspaper may be reproduced through any means wrthout the express permrssron of the Edrtor. Prrnted by Eastern Countres Newspapers.

Have you had an amazing sexual experience that you would like to share?

...

Special participants are needed for a documentary that will start filming in April and be broadcast on Anglia Television in October this year (2002). The programme will be a half-hour documentary, revealing some remarkable stories of people who have had exceptional sexual experiences . The producers are ultimately looking for young people (18-34) who have been in a sexual situation , one that they (nor the viewers) will ever forget, and who are willing to discuss this frankly and openly. The ideal candidates will : · Have been personally involved in a sexual advernture, encounter or episode . This might have been shocking , or surprising, hilarious. or really weird . Almost anything goes ... [Almost, but please see small print at the bottom of page) ·

Living in the East Anglia region, or the 'situation' happened in this region · This must be a true story. No fakers, please! For further information please contact: David Harris By email researchtv@hotmail.com Or phone William Hall : 07752-052-769 (Will call you back) Please note: The producers reserve the right to reject any material they feel will not be suitable for the programme. · In VIew of the ITC codes, the producers cannot accept the followmg types of stories: No stories of underage sexual S)(pe!"lences, no stories of sexual abuse. There will be no sum paid to the participants. However. costs may be covered. · All participants must be of 16 years and over et the time of filming. · We cenJQt accept anyone working for Grenada/Anglia Television •. or who has worked for

Granada?Anglia televsion in the past. Or who~e famil is working for Granada?Anglia Television or has worked for~ in the past.

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Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

'Canes humbled by superb UEA Pirates easily defeat former national champions

RESULTS FOOTBALL

BUSA Leagues: Mens I 0. Nott1ngham I 5: Mens 11 0, Loughborough 11 I; Mens Ill 2. Coventry Ill 4; DMU (Lelcs) 11 v Mens 11, postponed: Loughborough IV 3. Mens Ill 0: LHU (Lines) 3. Womens 0. Rogers & Norton Business Houses League, Division 1: UEA 3. Wensum Alb10n I Division One

AMERICAN FooTBALL: ALEX THORPE Sports Editor

The UEA Pirates scored a momentous victory over longtime rivals Hertfordshire to keep their playoff hopes alive. The Pirates last beat Herts in 1997. when they won a divisional title, before grabbing a hat-lrick of College Bowls, and four straight divi ional titles. Behind a powerful running game, the visitors scored with the first play

UEA Pirates 14-6 Herts Hurricanes

from scrimmage, but Pirate heads didn't drop. On their first drive, UEA went three and out and had to punt. !an Burchett's punt was downed at the Hens five-yard line and helped UEA force a fumble from the Canes' fullback. Recovering on the ten , the Pirates took just four plays to level the scores with a Jesse Lamberth oneyard dive before Burchett's kick fake gave them two points and the lead. With the visitors showing no

imagination in the air, they had no choice but to try and pound through UEA's strong defensive line to no avail. Both sides traded punts for most of the third quarter, before a second turnover gave UEA good field po ition. From their own 40, Lucien Giordano hit Burchett on the Herts 36. Burchett beat his coverage, broke a tackle, and ran the ball home for a second Pirates score. A muffed point after attempt left Hertfordshire in reach as the teams turned for the

fourth quarter. The Herts offense seemed to be finding some consistency as the quarter progessed, but just as they got some rhythm Burchett claimed an interception which he returned to the seven. With time running out, Herts had one last shot to tie the game. They marched the ball from their own 41 into the UEA red-zone. The defense then made their superiority count, forcing a sack, a fumble, and a turnover on downs. UEA ran out the clock to cling on to the game.

UEA Earlham Easton Saxon Eng Drayton SpiXWOrth Taverham Wensum Alb St Andrews A

Assistant Sports Editor

UEA Panthers Basketball team were condemned to another year in BUSA 2A following their defeat against Loughborough 2nds last Wednesday. The game started with a shock for UEA as Loughborough took a commanding lead in the first few minutes of the game. Playing aggressively yet tactically, Loughborough not only snatched a 10-point lead in the first 5 mmutes, but also managed to frustrate U EA, making it inc rea singly difficult for the Panthers to sett le down and demand an authority on the court. Following numerous fouls by Loughborough, UEA finally had a chance to get some points on the scoreboard. The second quarter was just as rough - starting with a score of 11-17 to Loughborough, UEA put on the pressure play. Ariane Habel scored some excellent points from underneath the bas-

ket, while captain Anelore Chauvin provided some first-rate outside shots. Despite this offensive surge and a strong defensive presence shown by Michele Weber and Lesley Carter, Loughborough managed to hold their lead. U EA entered the second half 26-33 . Yet hope remained - by the end of the fourth quarter UEA had managed to close the gap to 46-

Denmark Rgrs Red Roofs Cottage Rgrs Blof1eld Utd A FC Denmark UEA Reserves Yelverton Nch Umon A Jarrolds Jub1lee Tuddenham

Then, with only 40 seconds on the clock, Gemma Dorritt shot an impeccable three pointer to tighten the gap again . Loughborough had possession, but over ran the 24-second shot clock - UEA had 1.1 seconds to get off a shot; none ca me. Loughborough won

50-49. In the end, Loughborough played aggressively and consistently, and the victory was theirs. Supporter Beth Settle argued that it was the best game UEA had played this season , ' The quality of play was fabulous, the Panthers played with such determination and strength.' Coach Mr. Westgate later commented: ' We lost the game in the

Loughborough attack UEA during their BUSA matchup

first quarter when we tried to play at their pace instead of controlling the game and playing as a team. lt was a shame to see the final score with us losing by one point, as I firmly believe we have the best Ladies team that UEA has seen for years.' Although UEA no longer have any BUSA aspirations, the women have managed to qualify for the Local League Cup Finals to be held on March 13th. After beat1ng Great Yarmouth team Ko1 Joy

Cup dream on for UEA ALEX THORPE Sports Editor

For the third time in as many years, UEA's footballers have the chance to win a plac~ in a Carrow Road cup final. Following a semi-final defeat two years ago, they bounced back to reach the final last year, only to suffer a heartbreak! ng defeat on penalties. Now they are looktng to go one better, and Halt United are the only obstacle to them making a quick return to the home of

Norwich City. Holt fell victim to UEA at the first hurdle last season, and the Anglian Combination Division Two side will be looking for revenge. The Blues' form this season has been stuttering at best, with relegation from the top fl1ght of BUSA an almost certainty while in the cup they have overhauled more senior opposition in every round so far. Holt, on the other hand, have only lost two games all season, and are in the hunt for a promotion place to senior football. Should UEA reach a second successive Norfolk Junior Cup

PWDLFAPts 9 I 0 42 7 28 14 8 2 4 43 30 26 14 7 3 4 42 32 24 15 6 I B 33 47 19 12 5 0 7 33 47 15 8 6 1 1 28 8 14' 11 4 2 5 32 30 14 14 4 2 8 32 36 14 12 4 2 6 33 39 14 13 4 2 7 28 34 14 13 2 2 9 13 49 8

F1ve pomts deducted

HOCKEY

50.

f1nal, the FA may have to take action on the Angl ian Combination's repeated refusals to accept the Blues' own promotion hopes. Club captain Paul Jarrett has high hopes of reach1ng a second final 1n as many years. "We played there last year and we won 1-0, and we're playing better this year than last," he sa1d. "We've picked up some good f1rst years, and not lost anybody this year, so I'm confident of getting a result. The Combtnation may never let us in, but we can keep try1ng."

in the semi finals, UEA will face Kings Lynn, a team that harbours two ex-convicts. ' They are to ugh' admits Lesley Carter, 'but not unbeatable. • The men have also succeeded in reaching the Local League Cup Finals; following the women's game, they too will be playing on 13 March. If UEA is to make its mark in basketball while playing on home turf (the Sportspark), UEA will need all the support they can get.

1Three pomts deducted ' - Six pomts deducted

BADMINTON

BUSA Leagues: DMU (LeiCS) I 7. Mens I 1; Mens I 1, Nott Trent I 7. BASKETBALL

BUSA Leagues: Mens I 69. Anglia Poly I 63: Northampton I scr, Womens I w/o; Womens I 49, Loughborough 11 50. GOLF

BUSA Leagues: Loughborough I 2112, UEA I 317; UEA I 117, Warwick I 4\!.z. lACROSS E

BUSA Leagues: Ox Brookes I w/o, UEA I scr. NETBAlL

Division Two

Division 3: UEA A 1. Loddon A 2. Division Three PWDLFAPts E'lham Bndges 14 9 3 2 57 27 30 Little Melton 13 8 2 3 34 20 26 Aven!ls Eagles 12 8 1 3 47 29 25 UEA A 14 6 2 6 32 29 20 Salhouse Rvrs 11 6 1 4 31 31 19 Shotesham Rv 14 6 0 8 41 51 18 Marlboro' OB 12 5 2 5 22 21 17 SWalshamA 13 5 1 7 35 52 16 Nch Un1ted A 12 5 0 7 33 31 15 Loddon Utd A 13 5 0 8 24 35 15 Easton Res 16 1 4 11 22 52 7

Panthers recovery stalled at the last

I 17; Staffs (Staff) I 10. Mens 11 26: Womens I w/o, Le1cester I scr; Mens 11 B. Nottingham IV 24; Northampton I 5, Womens I 25. Men's Midlands-2 A PWDLFAPts UEA I 7 6 0 1 208·59 18 Leicester 6 5 0 I 1B4·47 15 Staffs (Staff) 7 5 0 4 161 ·96 15 Derby 6 3 1 2 118-7B 10 DMU (Le1c) 7 2 1 4 67·117 7 Coventry 6 2 1 3 73·125 7 UCE 8 3 0 5 95- 173 6' BCTFCS 6 1 I 4 19-136 4 Aston 7 1 0 6 76· I 70 ·3 2

• - F1ve pomts deducted

•-

JANINE AllAM

PWDLFAPts 12 11 0 1 51 11 33 11 10 0 I 51 16 30 15 8 2 5 30 2B 26 13 B 1 4 42 25 25 12 5 I 6 34 37 16 13 3 2 7 25 39 11 12 2 3 7 23 35 9 12 3 2 7 17 47 6' 15 I I 13 16 52 4

BUSA Leagues: Mens 11 0, Loughborough 11 5: Mens Ill 2, Nottingham Ill 6: Womens I w/o, Worcester I scr; Womens 11 w/o, Nothampton 11 scr; Nottingham Ill 3, Mens 11 1: Loughborough 11 18, Mens Ill 0: Warw1ck I 2, Womens I 0, Netts Trent 11 2, Womens 11 2. Women's Midlands· lA PWDLFAPts UEA I 9 7 1 1 20 7 22 Staff (Stoke) 9 6 1 2 28 16 19 Warw1ck 9 5 0 4 31 13 15 Worcester 8 4 1 3 17 11 10 Nett Trent 8 2 0 6 7 27 6 Le1cester 9 0 1 8 1 30 ·5 Printwize East Men's Hockey League Division 3NE: Dereham 11 1, UEA 2; UEA 11 3, Pelicans 11. · Martin and Adcock Norfolk Women's League, Premier Division: Watton I 2, UEA I 3: UEA I 5. Evergreens I 0. Premier Division

P UEA 13 Dereham 11 13 Watton 12 Harleston Colts 12 Yarmouth 11 Broadland 13 Evergreens 12 NchC1tyll 13 Nch Umon 11 13 NWalsham 12 •-

W 13 6 5 5 5 6 4 2 4 2

D 0 3 2 2 1 1 4 5 1 1

L 0 4 5 5 5 6 4 6 8 9

F 56 15 23 19 26 14 22 15 9 12

A Pts 10 36' 18 21 18 17 lB 17 17 16 19 16' 24 13' 22 17 27 10' 49 7

Three pomts deducted

Division 3: Watton Colts 1, UEA 11 2; UEA Ill 5. Harleston IV 0; Evergreens 11 1. UEA 11 2: Lowestoft Ra1lway I. UEA Ill 2

BUSA Leagues: Coventry I 41, Womens I 22; Womens I 42, Northampton 22; Loughborough Ill 47. Womens 11 2B. SQUASH

BUSA Leagues: Mens I w/Q, Ox Brookes scr; Nottingham I 5, Womens I 0. TABLE TENNIS

BUSA Leagues: Cambndge 112. Mens I 5; Womens I v Warw1ck. vo1d: Loughborough I scr, Womens I w/o. TENNIS

BUSA Leagues: Warw1ck 3. Mens I 3; Nottingham 11 w/o, Womens I scr; Womens I 2, Loughborough 11 4.

FIXTURES FEBRUARY 13 FooTBALL

Mens I Mens 11 Mens Ill Womens I

(h) (a) (h) (h)

BUSA BUSA BUSA BUSA

HOCKEY

Mens I v Derby (a) BUSA Mens 11 v Nottingham 11 (h) BUSA Mens Ill v Loughborough Ill (h) BUSA Womens I v Le1cester (a) BUSA Womens 11 v Derby 11 (a) BUSA RUGBY

Mens I v Le1cester (al BUSA Mens 11 v Wolverhampton 11 (h) BUSA Womens I v B1rm1ngham (al BUSA BADMINTON

Mens I

v Warw1ck

(a) BUSA

BASKETBALL

Mens I

v L1ncoln

(a) BUSA

GOLF

UEA

v Lincoln

(h) BUSA

NETBALL

UEA I UEA 11

v Leicester v Derby

(h) BUSA (a) BUSA

SQUASH

Womens I v WarwiCk

(a) BUSA

TABLE TENNIS

Mens I v B1rm1ngham Womens I v Birmingham

(h) BUSA (h) BUSA

TENNIS

Mens I

v Birmingham

(a) BUSA

FEBRUARY 16 FOOTBALL

Mens I Mens 11 Mens Ill

v Holt Un1ted (a) NJC v Tuddenham Marsh (a) R&N2 v South Walsham (a) R&N3

Mens I Mens 11 Mens Ill

v Bury St Edmunds (a) P3NE v Norw1ch Union 11 (h) P3NE v Norfok Nomads (a) P5NE

HOCKEY

FEBRUARY 17

RUGBY

BUSA Leagues: Mens I 31. Staffs (Staff)

v Loughborough v DMU (Beds) v Northampton IV v DMU (Le1cs)

AMERICAN FOOTBALL

UEA

v Surrey

(a) BCAFL

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Concrete's Perfectly manicured football column .....

·studS' Up To celebrate the hugely over-rated Valentine's Day, the female members Concrete have r;eplaced the St uds Up team to bring . ·you the latest n ~;ws from t he world of footba ll . But don't worry lads, we're on the ball, we know the score and we will certainly tell you when you are offside. ~"'{~'

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'"'

Being female, it is assumed that . we don't know what the offside rule is. We all remember our male friends trying to explain it in the pub with..Jwo gla~~~<>f coke, a,_straw and~. ~" empty crisp packet but still we did not understand. So when we were lucky enough to bum~?,)nto the-Norwich Cit y football team in the VIP area in Time, we had the perfect opportunity to ask t he pros for the lowdown. With the help ·of a couple of nice young men, who wi ll . t:,~(l)ain a~Jonympus, we .were finally flnlightened, before being asked !;lack to their houses to partake in some sordid sexual activities. Obviously we made our excuses and left the buil ding_ immediately.

We're not sure if y-.'e are .alone in thinking this, but why do the UEA football teain thinl< they are so cool? Maybe its because they are trying, in vain of cpurse, to be like the bad ass footballers from Footballers' Wives - minus the Porsches and the Gucci suits of COlJrse. Sorry .lads, us girls aren't impressed by a city-rider bus pass and Pri.mark chinos, you know. ·"'":,-

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Quotes Of The Fortnight " I ain't nuffin like Chardonnaaaay'' Posh Spice on the foot- · bailer's Wife character who was based on her. Too right honey, Chardonnay's hlJsband is fit. " I have a reputation for a style of play; get it , give it and f ind a new position- thats why I have been wit h my wife for thiry seven years" Graham Taylor after being appointed as Aston Villa's new man.ager~ .All we c;an say is lucky Mrs Taylor. '~"'''t~-

" When I see Manchester Utd play for 90 minutes, 1 come close to orgas ome agai ry ~ Gianluca Vial li obviously finds sexual excite hard t&."c6me by in Watford.

Jordan :;~

Soapbox

My Favourite Footba)ler.. Trevor Sinclair When Trevor transferred to Queens Park Rangers in 1995, most of t he· Loftus Road faithf ul were delighted. At last money had been spent wisely on a player who was one day going tQ play at international level. But I was pleased for another reason -· at fast there was someone for me to g9 and ogle over. you see, the talent at QPR was nowhere near that of the other Premiership teams. I found it ·unfair that Liverpool and Man United hogged all the fit men . I was immediately charmed by his toned physique and more importantly, his trademark dreadlocks. After four years of waiting around after matches for him to sign yet another autograph , it was time for him to go. lt was on ly a matter of t ime before he . was sold off to one of the more aesthetically pleasing teams despite him promising me on numerous occasions that tie would stay. I was left devastated when he moved on. But not being one to give up I followed Trev to his new East London home and I am pleased to say I am still his number one fan . Studs Up w~s campiled br Katle Hind, Liz Hutchinson and Charlotte Ronalds

The Ancient Indian art of yoga has become on e of the most po pu lar meth ods of relaxation in the country - and the most successful society at UEA. The med ical profession are not con vinced, though . Dai Borthwick reports adon na and St ing are perhaps more famous for kn ocking out t he odd tune and se lli ng a few records than their love of the ancie nt eastern art of yoga. Even Geri Hall iwe ll , who will perhaps do anyth ing to get her pict ure taken, has been caught doing it. But t he appea l ranges from an ybody from you r midd le-aged moth er of four next door to chi ldren as you ng as eigh t . You might even say t hat it 's t he trend of the 2 1st cen tury with ashtanga (power yoga) and hatha yoga classes popping up everywhere. The origi ns of Yoga proba bly lie in shama ni c practi ces, as there are simi larities in the te chniq ues of breath co ntrol, acq ui siti on of psychi c powers, th e summon ing of spiri ts and th e ability to wi thstand extreme co nd iti ons of hot and col d. Images of Gods, Gu ru 's or Rulers (we can no lon ger be su re whic h) are found in the rema ins of the Indus Valley civi lisations dat ing bac k to at least 4000 BC . Patanj al i is credited in th e 2nd ce ntury BC wit h first systemi sing Yoga in his famous Yogasutra's and thi s co ntain s reference to the Kund alini energy, th e Chakra's and the Nad i energy cha nnels within the body. Th e term Yoga is itself derived from the Sanskri t 'yoktra' or yoke . Yoga is often take n to mea n 'union ', because it points to yoga 's holi sti c approach to we ll-be ing, i.e . it ac hknowl edges each person as a union of body, mind and soul an d seeks to exercise all aspec ts to ach ieve well-be ing. However, tradit iona ll y yoga is the atte mpt to 'yoke' the lower consciousness (the ego) to t he higher consciousn ess but these aspects are more reserved for philosophy and re ligion and are not often associa ted wi t h the western prac t ice of yoga. Th e many form s of pose in Yoga (asanas) are ec hoed in classica l Indian da nce forms, and are named after anima ls, eg. Simhasana (Li on pose) and Mayurasana (Peacock pose). Yoga has been divided over its ce nturies of use into di fferen t trad it ions suc h as Hatha yoga (bodily exercise - the form often fo und in th e West) , Gyanyoga or Dnyan yoga (mi nd and inte ll ectu al exercises) and Karmayoga (everyday actions). In the West, Hatha Yoga has become the most famous form, thoug h its metaphysica l aspects are often forgotten

in favo ur of its hea lth-giving practices . The aim of th is integrated approac h of mi nd and body co nt rol is increase d phys ical health and happiness, togethe r with menta l peace and tranqu ill ity. Yoga prac t itioners claim that all forms of the discipl ine offer hea lth and physi cal bene fits - from loweri ng blood pressure to improvi ng fl exibility. Often th e first basic lesson of a yoga class is dee p, rhyt hm ic breathin g, wh ic h practi t ioners say can help to relieve respiratory complaints includ ing asthma, as we ll as feeding more oxygen to the musc les to boost their strength. it also helps to improve posture by teach ing relaxa t ion of t he neck, shoulders and upper back, easing tension th at can trigger ac hes an d pai ns in th e back. Certain postures ca n also he lp to lengthen and stre ngth en th e spine. Yoga practitioners also clai m that speci f ic postures such as abdominal twists gent ly massage interna l organs inc luding the kidneys to improve the ir ef ficiency while forwa rd be nds can stimul ate the digestive processes to help ease indigest ion prob lems. Th e inverted postures suc h as the head and shoulder sta nds, boost blood circulat ion and the refore improve skin tone. The deep rel axation exerc ises normally practised at the end of a class can also rel ieve stress and anxiety, t hey claim . Ti m Naylor, a the rapist at the Yoga The rapy Ce ntre at Roya l Homeopa th ic Hospital, London, uses yoga to trea t condi ti ons tha t invo lve the brain. " A lot of people deny that the bra in is invo lved in their med ical cond it ion but often for example lower back pain can be caused by mental tension which leads to stiffness in the neck or back . " Yoga works on th e subconsc ious which has a powerful effec t over th e body. " it can get into the subconscious, which migh t be holding tensions caused by stress, and help to let them go in a controlled safe fash ion and eventually the medical or hea lth problem that was caused by the te nsion wi ll disappea r. " But yoga is a co mplemen tary th erapy and shoul d t herefore be used in conjunct ion with co nve ntional med icine." He says. However many dispute this claim and Dr Mayur Lakhani, vice-cha irman of the Royal

A ·calmer campus ... Founder and President Bob Goodson explains the UEA Yoga Club's origin and success ··w

hat's the_biggest sport club at UEA? You may well guess it's rowing, rugby, · hockey or football . ' ' the last two years it has in fact But for been the Yoga Club. When I asked the Union about starting the club in December 1999 they said I could try, but may have difficulty f inding the required thirty members. We distributed posters, set up a stall in the Hive and had 35 people sign up in the first hour!

The clllb has since attracte9 450 members, organising 160 classes to date . Now in its th ird year, we have fo~r weekly classes to provide for 140 members. Our four experienced teachers - Bob Camp, Paul Compton , Melan ie Willsher and Liesa Prewer - are all qualified with the govern ing body, The British Wheel of Yoga. The classes are designed to compliment student lifestyles, in terms of content (hatha yoga), location (on campus), time (early even ing) and cost (free to members). ' My yoga class is one of the essential , not to be missed highlights of my week,' says

Above: yoga member Liz Harding during a class

College of General Pract it ioners, advocate s exercise over yoga. He said: " There is a lot of strong eviden ce based resea rch that proves regu lar aerobi c exerc ise can help to prevent heart disease , so that is the model GPs promote . " Twenty to 30 minutes of exerci se that increases the heart rate, in cluding a brisk wa lk, swim mi ng and cycl ing, done three times a week can help people to lose weigh t and preve nt hea rt problems. " Th ere is no research eviden ce to support the cla ims that yoga can relieve any medical condi t ions. Doctors would need to see evi dence to substantiate them before promot ing yoga which might in fact be unsafe and harm fu l for some people to do ." But Ken Simmons, chairman of the British Wh ee l of Yoga, the gove rni ng body of yoga in the UK said : "Everyone can benefit from pract ising yoga as it's a holisti c disc ipl ine tha t helps the bod y, men tally, physically and spiri tually."

Lara Earnshaw (SOC 1), 'it is the one society I have joined and stayed committed to.' Thanks to energetic committee members Laura Swiszczowski (SOC 2) and Naomi Webber (CHE PG) we've enjoyed three social events and lectures on The Philosophy of Yoga. Members can look forwa ~d to a range of Yoga Club cloth ing and a series of workshops by renowned teacher Mil<.i Marks. Unlike previous years attendance is hardly dwindling at all . On average 70 people are attending each week, making us the most active society at UEA - a testament to the suitabi lity and quality of the classes. However, this has meant we've been unable to take new members during the year. To provide for our long wa iting list and anyone else that's interested we are organising a special series of summer classes."

If you 're interested in jo ining e-mail yogasoc@yahoo.eo m .

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Revenge is sweet for UEA UEA Netball lsts were able to avenge three years of close-run defeats by Northampton lsts on Wednesday, hammering them

44-22, writes Jon Carter. The victory moves UEA above Northampton in the Midlands Netball Women's lsts Division and was a memorable moment for the leaver as they achieved some sweet revenge. Two early goals by Shelly H m de got U EA off to a good start as they began to dominate the UCN players. The taller attack pairing of Heinde and Suzanne Jones combined well w1th some flurd passrng and good reboundIng skills to put the team up by five goals to nrl. Early footwork calls hindered any replies from UCN as Rachel Taylor and Helen Edwards were able to feed the attack for more scores. U EA extended the lead to 7-0 before UCN were able to reply with a good shot from distance. By the end of the first quarter UEA were rn control as a combination of sterling defence from Jess Bowden and good shooting from Heinde and Jones gave UEA a lead of 8-4. The second quarter saw good pressure from Arlsa Hemmrng and Taylor force UCN to lose possession regularly. In attack, Hmde shot well as UEA worked the ball around and over to her. By half-trme, Emma Botwrrght and Bowden had kept the UCN attackers at bay, while Jones scored with ease at the other end: 21-10. UCN started the second half brightly but were agam pressured out of scorrng as Jones and Hmde capitalised. Good rebounding by Hinde allowed Jones to add to her tally. The defence held f1rm until the break, forcmg UCN mto difficult shots and claiming the rebounds; Taylor and Hemming then fed the attack to tighten the lead to 32-

13. Ultimately, a dejected UCN team came into the final quarter w1th too much to do. UEA continued their flurd passing movements and resolute defence to run out eventual winners by double the score of therr opponents. Suzanne Jones top scorer w1th 24 of the teams points; while Jess Bowden held the UCN attack to thei r second lowest score of the competition. Rachel Taylor said afterwards "The team ecstatic. Thrs rs the first time that we have beaten UCN 1n 3 years, as we've always lost by a few goals. this is the perfect leaving present to those of us who are leaving this year."

Promotion all but guaranteed RuGBY:

UEA 30-17 Staffordshire (Stafford)

RICHARD ALISON

In an unattractive game of rugby, UEA's unrelenting attack left Staffs with nowhere to hide as they stormed to the top of BUSA

2A. On a grey afternoon, consistent pressure from UEA forced the visiting stand-off to repeatedly kick away possession, while the Staffordshire backs made numerous handling errors.

Taggart, which broke the back of the Staffs side. Fly half Richard Pilgrim, recently awarded a bursary by Norwrch RFC, played a solid game, and captain Wrll Hazel prarsed hrs srde. "I'm really very pleased with the way the team played today, and I hope we can carry rt forward mto the Lercester game," he sa1d.

The UEA Hockey first team added more pressure on title challengers Bury St Edmunds on Saturday, by thrashing Harleston 4-0 in a convincing performance. With a game in hand, UEA's men look likely to match the women in

Thrs vrctory puts UEA three por nts clear of Lercester at the top of their BUSA League, but from a game more after the midlands srde had the1r tre at Derby called off last week. The top two meet at Lercester rn UEA's frnal game of the season this week, with the title and promotron ultimately on the lrne for the wrnner.

Unfortunately for UEA the lrneouts were not going smoothly, and consequently most of the play took place in a crowded midfield. Tighthead prop Rrchard Rodda and full back John Prrtchard gave the 40 strong crowd someth1ng to cheer though, as they rumbled over for a pair of unconverted trres each before half t1me. As the second half progressed, Staffordshire clawed the score back to 20-17 with a penalty and two converted tnes. UEA pressure from the following kick off resUlted in an interception deep in Staffordshrre's half, and a v1tal spell of home possessron. UEA caprtalrsed on the freld posrtron wrth rhe first of two quick tries from wing Peter

Nottingham prove too strong for 2nds RUGBY:

UEA 11 8 Nottingham Ill 24

DAN IEL LORNE

UEA seconds, on the heels of their best performance of the season at Staffordshire, and spurred on by the possibility of promotion, gave a good account of themselves in this second against third battle versus an impressive Nottingham side at Colney Lane. But it quickly became evident that tbe hosts provided far more of a challenge than their vi itor had expected, pinning Nottingham into their own 22. Nottingham occasionally managed to turn defence into anack with fast ball, but never seriously trouble the UEA try-line. After 30 minutes of back-andfonh play m the midfield, the fir 1 point were finally registered, with incisive passing from the UEA back allowmg Canadian winger Jon Mosely - playing his penultimate BUSA game for UEA - to power over in the corner. Mosely's attempt to conven his own try - a difficult touchline kick with a trong crosswind - fell agonisingly shon. It was then UEA's tu:n to defend. a ottingham pu hed forward in an anempt to even things up before the

break. The UEA defence proved equal to everything Nottingham - who had a positive point difference of 196 at stan of play- could throw at themre pite coming with the referee's whistle, giving UEA a 5-0 lead at half-time. The half-time break was all the re pile UEA were afforded, with oningham going traight back on the attack as soon as the second period began. UEA held strong for the opening exchanges of the ha! f, unti I ottingham reacted quicke t to a loose ball in the UEA in-goal area to score their opening points, and took the lead when the try was convened. UEA re-took the lead a few moments later, when Mosely kicked a penalty re ulting from a maul being pulled down by a otungham nanker. ottingham' two-point advantage was restored almo 1 instantly with a penalty of their own, before two late convened tries gave the visitors a victory margin that nattered them. Despite the defeat, UEA captain Patrick Pineda wa proud of the perfomlance shown by his side "Thr performance marks the improvement in the 2nd XV over the course of the eason. We held our own, and held our heads htgh too," he said.

City struggle for form DAN HUTCHINGS

Having only managed to take two points and score two goals through the whole of January, Norwich must have been relieved to get to February still in touch with the other playoff contenders. ot ince the Canaries 5-0 demolition of Sheffield ~ednesday on December 29 had ~ i ty won. Apt, then that this sticky run came to an end against Wednesday' local rivals Sheffield United. But it was through the most unlikely of sources: defender Darren Kenton. However, before the game city fans were despondent, facing another game without top corer lwan Robens. Con i tent defender Adam Drury was also mi ing, injured at Crewe, where his team lost l-0 after highly rated striker Dean A hton' mishit shot bamboozled keeper Paul Crichton and trickled over the line. After a scrappy flfSt half, the second offered liule more until a five-minute period decided the game. A Keith Curie challenge let the ball break free and it fell nicely

for Kenton. who ran through to slide the ball past United keeper Tracy. The econd came two minute later; a corner from another ubstitute, Phi! Mulryne. found Kenton free to head the ball home. Blade playmaker Michael Brown then hit a corching 25-yard effon to pull one back. but the screamer was to no avail. Unfonunately for City they rounded off the fortnight with defeat, slipping l-0 at West Brom. Daniele Dichio gave the Baggies all three points with a clo e range header towards the end of the first half.

CANARIES ROUNDUP NATIONWIDE LEAGUE, DIVISION ONE P W D L GO 6. Coventry 33 16 5 12 13 7 C. Palace 33 17 2 14 11 8. CITY 30 16 5 12 2 9. Preston 33 13 11 9 8 10. Brrm'ham 31 13 8 10 9

PT 53 53 53 50

COMING UP... 22102 Preston (h) 7.45 D1 Tickets £8.50 (members £7) 26102 Watford (a) 8.00 D1 CLUB TOP SCOR-::c ER: - - - - Iwan Roberts

UEA HC push for double local promotion JON CARTER

SPORT

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Concrete WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2002

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promotion if they can maintain this fonn. Saturday's game aw nuid and open movements by UEA after a slow tan where Harleston controlled most of the possession. Graham M edland and Olly Gall saw some early chances, but nothing came of them until Downer drove deep into the bean of the defence and put Gall throu&lj to score.

Soon afterward , Downer turned goalscorer as he lid the ball through the legs of a defender on the goal line after a scramble in the area. UEA were able to cruised funher ahead j ust before the half, as Gall smashed home from the edge of the area to put them three-up. Ultimately UEA's posse sion paid off as Medland fini hed the rout after good work by Gall and Rye.

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UEA infli ct first BUSA defeat of season on leaders Loughborough GoLF: Loughborough 2~- 3 ~ UEA DAVID KITSON

UEA Golf 1st team recorded an impressive victory in their first BUSA match this term against unbeaten leaders Loughborough , w inning 3lf2-

what was needed for the result." James Taylor went five down after six holes after a series of wayward shots left him with a deficit he simply could not overturn , unfortunately marking the end of his 100% unbeaten BUSA record.

"After a disappointing first few holes I managed to pull it back into a closely fought match before eventually being beaten on the 15th," he said afterwards. Rob White fought well against his opponent in a tight match but the result did not go his way, Ios-

ing 4&3. Rob was disappointed with his result but added: "lt was brilliant to be part of the team that beat Lough borough." Nick Lewis and captain Kitson also claimed a point each, giving the squad an unexpected boost

and sending the golf club to one of their greatest victories. Going into the final two matches of their campaign, with the next f ixture against bottom-ofthe-league Warwick, the team are confident they can get a result , having beaten them earlier this

season. "The against next ," sa id Craig. " If we can duce another good pe we could well finish in the three and progress to the stage."

2lf2 .

Reign ing National Champ ions and leading the league this year, Loughborough appeared rattled by recently promoted UEA, and the result practically guarantees top division status for the team next year. " I really am proud of the team ," said Captain David Kitson. " lt wasn 't a match we were expecting to win due to the quali ty of ou r opponents, so it's nice to get a win like thi s at Loughborough because they are so far ahead in terms of exce llence in sport. " Graham Badger and Craig Petrie gave the performances of the match . Badger managed to clinch a half after a gruelling duel with one of England 's finest student players and showed great determination th roughout with the help of his caddy Joe Conway. " I was pleased with the victory, I feel we deserved it after the trouble we had in Loughborough Union the night before ," he sa id. "If it wasn't for Joe it could have been different, he was inspirat ional throughout the match." Petrie 's victory came over another England hotshot . " lt was a tough match and I fought hard for the win , condi tions weren't the best but I did

A Loughborough golfer fails to avoid the hazards

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