Venue 348

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Issue 348.


Editorial

A note from the editor

“It was so lovely to see so many people at our “Contrast” open mic night, and I’d like to say a big thank you to everyone who came to read and support us” It’s been another exciting week for Venue and Concrete.

-Tom Bedford

Deputy Editor We’re already in week five of second semester, how wild is that? It seems like only yesterday I was writing my Christmas editorial. For those of you who are already deep into the swing of working all day every day, I’m sure you’ll find the sex survey will bring some spice to your day ahead of the 14th. We’ve got a lot of sexy content in this issue to reflect all the interesting findings and answers from the survey (you know who you are!) But for those who stick to television, books and games to hide away from those annoying clingy couples at this time of year, we’ve got you covered too. Film has reviews of some of the new releases in pages 8 and 9, our central features page is an interview with Call the Midwife’s Jennifer Kirby, and music gives high praise to two new albums on page 17. I’d also like to say thank you to everyone who came to the open mic event for the Contrast supplement – what a turn-out! We hope you all had as much fun as I did!

At our “Contrast” open mic night, we enjoyed great readings from some of our regular writers, as well as from those who are a bit newer to Venue. It was so lovely to see so many people there, and I’d like to say a big thank you to everyone who came to read and support us It was a particularly exciting night for me, as it was my first time reading at an open mic. To anyone who is thinking of doing something similar and hasn’t quite gotten around to it yet, I’d definitely recommend having a go. It was a lot of fun, and there’s so many different literature events going on around Norwich to get involved in. In between organising the open mic and enjoying last week’s “Contrast” supplement , we’ve been working hard on this year’s Valentine’s issue of Venue, in-keeping with Concrete’s beautiful Sex Survey supplement. On page 24, our writers’ share their favourite steamy television shows, whilst on page 16 we list the the best songs to listen to while cuddling up with your loved one. If you’re struggling to find an outfit to wear on your Valentine’s date take a look at pages 12 and 13 for some inspiration. We’ve also included some great Valentine’s Day art; Lotty Clare’s gorgeous cover art work is deserving of a special mention. I had a dabble at creating some Valentine’s themed art earlier this week too – you can see the results of my artistic endeavours on page 7.

Arts Editor - Mireia Molina Costa Film Editor - Gus Edgar Fashion Editor - Leah Marriott Creative Writing Editor - Saoirse Smith - Hogan

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-Kate Romain

Venue Editor Gaming Editor - Amy Nash Television Editor - Dan Struthers Music Editor - Nick Mason Arts and Design Assistant - Emily Mildren


Contents

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13th February 2018

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Film

Fashion

Television editor Dan gives us an amusing (and horrifying) glimpse into the books that featured in the Bad Sex in Fiction Awards

In light of the phenomenon that is 50 Shades of Grey, Sophie Bunce considers whether or not sex scenes in films are ever necessary

Bobby Onanuga and Faith Ogunkeyede are back with their “Campus Catwalk” feature

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Music

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23

Gaming

Television

Our music writers reveal their favourite steamy songs, just in time for Valentine’s day

Gaming editor Amy reviews the bizzarre yet charming Hatoful Boyfriend

Television editor Dan argues that unrealistic portrayals of sex on teleivsion can be more damaging than watching porn

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Arts

Front and Back cover credit: Lotty Clare

Creative Writing

Features

Peter Preciado explores the themes of love and loss in his prose piece, Old Woman On a Bridge

Venue editor Kate catches up with UEA alumna Jennifer Kirby, star of Call the Midwife

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Arts

Bad Sex in Fiction Awards: Venue’s favourites maybe fetish-y, portrayal of sex is in Erica Jong’s Of Blessed Memory: “at last he ejaculates, shuddering and growling, making the noises of a seal baying at the Arctic moon. “‘My slippery seal,’ I say, ‘my salty sweetheart, my kingdom of the three slipperies.’”

The annual Bad Sex in Fiction Awards seeks to “draw attention to poorly written or redundant passages of sexual description in otherwise decent novels.” In all honesty though, it appears to just want to poke fun at some outrageously bad sex writing. However, terribly written books like Fifty Shades of Grey or nonfiction books like Call Me Dave which details David Cameron’s alleged sexual encounter with a dead pig are not eligible. Despite this, there are some absolute crackers of bad sex throughout the 25 years of these awards, and after hours

What’s on in Norwich The Vagina Monologues 16th Feb - UEA Drama Studio Gallowglass 20th - 24th Feb - Theatre Royal Visible Girls: Talk with Anita Corbin 24th Feb - Norwich Arts Centre Hideo Furukawa and Toshiki Okada: Japan Now 24th Feb - Writers’ Centre Norwich Poetry in Motion 25th Feb - Norwich Playhouse

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of trawling through them I have hand selected some of the best… Some of these entries are hot and the first extract is literally boiling. May-Lan Tan describes sex in Things to Make and Break as: “God. It’s like sticking your cock into the sun. I fuck her deep and slow, watching her mouth and feeling her move. When I get too close, I pull out and let my dick cool.” Likewise, The Seventh Function of Language by Laurent Binet details this extreme heat, “Bianca grabs Simon’s dick, which is hot and hard as if it’s just come out of a steel forge, and connects it to her mouth-machine.” If you’re wondering what a “mouthmachine” is, I’m afraid I cannot shed any light there. While so far the extracts appear to be just badly written, if you’re being generous, there are some, frankly, just disturbing portrayals of sex among these other nominees and winners. Janet Ellis lets us in on a rather intimate confession in The Butcher’s Hook as she states, “‘Till now, I thought the sweetest sound I could ever hear was cows chewing grass. But this is better.’ He sways and we listen to the soft suck at the exact place we meet. Then I move and put all thoughts of livestock out of his head.” Another animal-themed,

Image: Wikimedia Commons, Jacobo Canady, work by Tracey Emin

The quality of writing makes you wonder if these writers are trying to be nominated for the prestigious Bad Sex Award or just living vicariously through their disturbed protagonists. I can only hope that no one has had a sexual experience like Christos Tsiolkas in Dead Europe. Tsiolkas describes how “she smelt of farting and diarrhoea, shitting and pissing, burping, bile and vomit. I forced my tongue into this churning compost. Her blood was calling me.” 2013 Bad Sex nominee Jonathan Grimwood takes a note from this as he wrote The Last Banquet, in which he asks the reader: “You know the peasant saying? If you can’t imagine how neighbouring vineyards can produce such different wines put one finger in your woman’s quim and another up her arse, then taste both and stop asking stupid questions…” I can only apologise if you’re faint of heart and stomach. With limited space left, I’ll rattle through some more hilarious excerpts ranging from the incredibly vivid, “she grabbed at his dick, which was leaping around like a shower dropped in an empty bath” (Giles Coren, Winkler) to the downright bizarre, “You see a designer pussy. Hair razored and ordered in the shape of a swastika. The Aryan denominator” (Aniruddha Bahal, Bunker 13). But the one I really want to leave you with is perhaps my favourite from John Updike’s The Widows of Eastwick where the following post-coital conversation occurs: “‘Call me Sukie,’ she said, having read his mind. ‘I sucked your cock.’ ‘You sure did. Thanks. Wow.’”

-Dan Struthers


Arts

The changing face of female empowerment The empowerment of femininity and female sexuality has, particularly with the expansion of feminism over the last fifty years, become an increasingly common theme within art, developing as society’s views have changed. Over time, women have begun using increasingly inventive and powerful ways to promote their sexuality and general female experiences to a wider audience, not only generating political discussion about the place of women within art, but the everyday image of women in regard to their relationships with men, society, and sex. Perhaps most commonly thought of as the originator of this movement was Georgia O’Keeffe who painted flowers with strong vaginal themes (although the intention behind this is unclear) in the first half of the twentieth century. However, the development of mediums since then has given artists an increasingly variable way of expressing themselves through art. Even as early as the 1940s, women have been experimenting with art to express themselves and their place in society. Louise Bourgeois first began experimenting with the restricted and domestic ideas of womanhood by replacing the heads of painted women with houses,

but she became well-known for her Maman (2000) sculptures. The collection was made up of large sculpted spiders which Bourgeois contrasted against the traditional sinister connotations of arachnids, to instead symbolise the idea of a maternal figure who spins and weaves to nurture and protect. Similarly, Cindy Sherman began experimenting with photography and film in the 1950s, and in 1981 unveiled her project Centerfolds, which focused specifically on media stereotyping of women. With it, she intended to encourage men to evaluate their preconceptions when viewing women in the media. She has also worked with the idea that women can still be considered as victims within these parameters, even if photographs taken are done so with their consent; they have no control over how their bodies will be viewed or sexualised by other people, even if the shots themselves are objectively un-sexy. More recently, Tracey Emin (now one of the first two female professors at the Royal Academy), has used installation art to express her experiences with sex and sexual assault in a frank and real situation.

Images: (top) Flickr, Stephanie; (bottom) Flickr, Andy Hay

Within her 1998 piece, My Bed, she used her own unmade and dirty bed to highlight the everyday nature of modern sex. This is predated by her project Everyone I Ever Slept With, a tent in which she sewed the names of every person she had ever had intercourse with. Here, Emin rejects the idea of sex as a romantic and surreal act, as it is often portrayed in art, and instead highlights it as a messy, casual experience and incorporated into everyday life. Experimenting even further, Dani Lessnau has worked with the ideas of male gaze within her new project Extimite (2018). In it, she fused art with her body by using a pinhole camera inserted into her vagina to take pictures of her lovers. She and her work express a desire for a greater connection to her own feelings and relationships, both with the subject of the image and the art itself. By ‘becoming’ the camera, she throws herself into every aspect of the project and strengthens the feeling of intimacy that surround her images. To her, the idea of ‘gaze’ is as powerful as we allow it to be, highlighting the vulnerable yet liberating situation that both she and her partners were placed in within her project.

-Abi Steer

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Arts

Bangin’ good art The novel

The play

The podcast

Rubyfruit Jungle was released at a time when queer literature wasn’t really a thing. Most queer books published today shy away from a lot of things Rita Mae Brown just throws in your face. Its unapologetically gay heroine doesn’t care about anyone’s opinion. She gets into university with no money, and is soon kicked out for being gay—but if you think this will stop her from kicking ass, you don’t know Molly Bolt.

Eve Ensler’s Vagina Monologues are a series of verbatim interviews that delve into the women’s relationships with their vaginas through the eyes of women from all walks of life. Standout pieces include collections of pithy pieces that ask the real questions: “If your vagina could speak, what would it say?” Funny, poignant and relatable, these monologues are a fresh, empowering take upon female sexuality.

Reading your own father’s sexual fantasies is nightmare material for most people, but Jamie Morton hilariously analyses his Dad’s erotic literature with his friends James Cooper, and BBC Radio 1’s Alice Lavigne, in podcast ‘My Dad Wrote a Porno’. Your cringiest post-LCR drunken experience will pale in comparison. Highly recommended light relief from a heavy library session.

-Yaiza Canopoli

-Amy Bonar

-Ciara McIlvenna

Nothing is too daring for Nan Goldin authenticity and empathy, Nan Goldin shows us the lives of those around her, as well as her own. Her traumatic and troubled life experience started at age 11, when her 19-year-old sister Barbara took her own life. Barbara’s rebellious attitude was so troublesome for her parents that they decided to place her in various institutions during her teens. After this episode, Nan developed a deep-rooted hate for the constrictions and unspoken rules of the respectable middle-class family stereotype. Her pictures show everything that those rules rejected.

Born in 1953 to a Jewish family in downtown Boston, Nan Goldin is one of the most sincere photographers of her time. Her iconic work, The Ballad of Sexual Dependency (1985), is the diary of her life in New York City with her friends, who she referred to as her “extended family.” With crude

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Goldin left home at 14 to attend Satya School, an unconventional institute in which students and teachers had an equal say regarding what was being taught and how. Here, she was given her first camera and started taking pictures. Influenced by pop art movies, Federico Fellini, Helmut Newton and Italian and French Vogue, Goldin slowly started to make her name around the art scene of Boston. To those who compared her to Diane

Arbus, who used to take pictures of “freaks” (including the transvestite community), Goldin said: “To me, queens were not men. My work was much more respectful to them. I’ve never thought of a drag queen as a man. That’s really the last thing I think about when I look at them. They weren’t women either, by the way, they were another species.” Goldin treats her subjects with extreme empathy. She does not just look at the scene from a camera – she lives and feels the same things. Nothing is too sincere. Nothing is too daring, too sexual, too weird to be her subject. Or maybe everything is too much, and that is exactly why it’s a story worth telling. Most of the friends she took pictures of for the Ballad died during or before the 1990s, either because of drug overdose or because of the AIDS outbreak. The American photographer does not filter her images in any way. She doesn’t care about expensive equipment or elaborate structures. Her images show her reality as it is, scars and bruises included (even her own).

-Alessandra Arpaia

Images: (top) Pixabay, stux; (middle) Wikimedia Commons, team art in berlin; (bottom) Michelle B., Flickr


Collage by Kate Romain

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Film

The Commuter is a B movie done right The Commuter is the latest feature from Jaume Collet-Serra, the director of three other Liam Neeson-led movies: Unknown, Non-Stop, and Run All Night. The film follows an ex-cop who travels on a train to work every day. On his way home after being fired from his job, he recieves a hypothetical question from a mysterious passenger. This leads him of the quest of finding a passenger who, according to our mysterious guest, does not belong on the train. Can he find this passenger before the train reaches its destination?

With the situation escalating, this is a very B movie-esque film, but after two viewings it is safe to say that this is a train offering a trip worth taking. There are some surprises along the way, including the eventual discovery of the mystery passenger. The performances on display are great too, with characters ranging from a businessman with attitude to a punk girl, bringing some fun in with the seriousness. Neeson, who is suitably charismatic, is characterised and developed well as

your typical everyday man, though he possesses elements of his role as an action hero in Taken. The fight sequences and CGI are where the movie falters, along with a couple of decisions in its narrative. While these aspects are hit and miss in their execution, a solid cast more than makes up for it. The Commuter is an action thriller that, while occasionally clumsy, makes up for this with both its capable craft and cast.

-Balázs Kökényesy

Phantom Thread is “mournful and stunning” Paul Thomas Anderson’s Phantom Thread is an amalgamation of the arts, with the outcome being a violently charming masterstroke. It’s a Zolaesque piece of sophistication, rife with addiction, passion and possession. Reynolds Woodcock (Daniel Day-Lewis) is a selfish creature of haute couture; a perverse man-child dependant on strict routine. When he meets young waitress Alma (Vicky Krieps), a sickly relationship begins. He objectifies her as art, but with her consent, she becomes his muse. From the lavish settings of 1950s London, to Woodcock’s atelier, there is a fascination present in the cinematography, occasionally reminiscent of Edward Hopper. Krieps and Day-Lewis’ portrayal of their characters inspires ineffable tension and attachment. Replacing the painting with filmmaking, summarised by Hopper’s aphorism, ‘If you could say it in words there would be no reason to paint.’ The film is intelligently and expressively crafted. Alma severely desires to take care of Woodcock, who is preoccupied with the selfish concern of personal development. That selfishness is then matched with a lustful and jealous sabotage, executed by Alma. It may feel as though the crux comes too late, but we still swoon in the clever twist’s betrayal of romanticisation.

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The writing is mournful and stunning. With lines like “There is an air of quiet death in this house and I do not like the way it smells,” there are countless

opportunities for humour. Woodcock’s profanities are hilarious, as are Alma’s assertive retaliations. Lesley Manville’s portrayal of Cyril, Woodcock’s sister, is icewitchesque, or rather, a softer, defrosting ice-witch, also contributing towards those precious moments of humour. The skill set of Manville and Day-Lewis introduces a threatening air. The two work incredibly well together in creating the authority of artisan predators, with Alma as their prey. Alma refers to Woodcock as a “hungry boy,” and Cyril specifically smells ‘sandalwood and rosewater’ on Alma. Although Woodcock’s ill-manners and strict routine may frustrate Alma, he does experience loving obsession towardsw her, remarking, “I feel as if I’ve been looking for you for a very long time.” With captivating fabrics, sweet pastries and abundant longing stares, Phantom Thread may seem to prove that “violent delights have violent ends.” Nevertheless, the concentrated emotions between our two protagonists appear to defy such predictions. It is a commentary on how people tailor themselves for love and how love can surpass addiction, but can also be the addiction.

-Anisha Jackson Image: Universal Pictures


Film

Are sex scenes ever necessary? People have sex. It’s normal for people to have sex. So it’s not shocking that we see it in films. Perhaps sex scenes are uncomfortable on a Sunday night watching a film with your Mum, but otherwise - it’s just sex. If writers and directors chose to hide it they’d encourage the idea that sex = shameful, an outdated idea society is rightly moving past.

Me By Your Name, and their depiction of sex between same-sex couples. Call Me By Your Name uses warm hues to show longing and lust in scenes that are not fetishised but explored. The sex in Carol serves a purpose; it isn’t intended to be

We can’t talk sex scenes without addressing the whip-wielding elephant in the room: Fifty Shades of Grey. It’s not to everyone’s taste but it shows an approach to sex that is often considered taboo in conversation. Billionaire Christian Grey’s collection of toys is perhaps out of most people’s price range but for some, it’s the only insight they get. The film acts as an education of sorts, and learning is never a bad thing. The sex scenes teach that people have different kinds of sex, and that’s ok.

salacious but reflective. Scenes like this aren’t new, but their immediate box office popularity shows changing attitudes and increasing inclusivity. Sex scenes come bound in tension and not just the saucy kind. There are relevant and important conversations surrounding exploitation and gratuitous nudity, particularly of women, that should be heard within the film community. In the event of discomfort, sex scenes aren’t sex scenes anymore, they’re exploitation. The problem is not with sex but with its context. Scenes that add to story and explore character are welcome. Otherwise not. We all agree on that. There are sex scenes in films because people have sex. It’s really that simple. Some people have no sex - also ok. It’s necessary, not because we need to relate to characters to understand ourselves, but because it helps us better understand each other. Some people do that? Cool.

Fifty Shades is explicitly explicit; it knows what it is. But if that’s too much, consider the last few years in film. There are titles in which sex acts as complementary to the story, not all consuming. Think Carol, Call

-Sophie Bunce

Downsizing: a film of two halves

Downsizing, director Alexander Payne’s latest film, is an interesting beast in a strong body of work. Set in a near future, the narrative utilises the lofty concept of “downsizing”: the irreversible process of shrinking humans down to approximately five inches tall as means of combating overpopulation. Opening in a world where both normal and “downsized” people coexist, the film follows strapped-for-cash occupational therapist Paul Safranek (Matt Damon) who lives with his wife, Audrey (Kristen Wiig). They ponder the procedure after meeting a friend at a reunion party, who reveals other benefits - financial security, for one.

has a lot hidden up its sleeve, perhaps accounting for the film’s decidedly mixed reception. It’s actually a lot better than the reviews would suggest, and is a marvel in world-building. The settings that Payne creates are frequently awe-inspiring and the minutiae admirable, greatly elevating the verisimilitude of the film.

To reveal any more would be a disservice to the film as this is what is sold in the marketing. However, Downsizing

Downsizing balances comedy and emotion well, and is bolstered by being both thematically rich and chock-full of

That said, a tonal shift midway through does feel like a switch-and-bait. There is still enjoyment to be had in the slightly more familiar, “finding oneself ” narrative route Payne explores, even though its moral messages are delivered heavyhandedly.

metaphors, right down to the very concept of the film itself, interrogating political and planetary notions. The performances are sound, the highlights being those of being Christoph Waltz and Udo Kier. To see both German-speaking stalwarts share the screen is very satisfying. Downsizing is a commendable effort by Alexander Payne, with transfixing worldbuilding, but it requires one to have faith in the tonal shift in its second half. The first half is much stronger, but the direction it takes thereafter is probably why many have taken quite sourly to the film: you don’t exactly get what the trailers promised.

-Oscar D. Huckle

Image: Focus Features

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Film

7 great raunchy films Our writers share the films that get them hot and flustered... The Graduate

The graduate begins with, a young Dustin Hoffman being seduced by an older woman and ends with him falling in love with the older woman’s daughter. It features a haunting soundtrack by Simon and Garfunkel, and some pretty steamy scenes. Released in 1967, modern viewers will likely view the film differently to contemporary viewers; nevertheless, it is definitely worth a watch this Valentine’s Day. - Kate Romain

Top Gun

The most memorable thing about this 80s classic is its volleyball montage featuring an array of oiled torsos and the homoerotic tension between Tom Cruise and Val Kilmer. As one Amazon reviewer puts it, “I’m not sure who took the sex scenes out of this gay porn movie but they didn’t do it any favours”…- Dan Struthers

I’m So Excited!

What to do when your plane can’t land? Drug the passengers with mescaline and then fuck like there’s no tomorrow! This bizarre Spanish film features a trio of flamboyant, tequila-addled flight attendants, an ageing dominatrix, and a woman in her thirties losing her virginity to an unconscious stranger. Weird but fun. - Liam Heitman-Rice

Shame

Steve McQueen is a director not afraid of showing the explicit, and in his second film, Shame, he depicts multiple graphic sex scenes. In a refreshing change, he lets the audience see as much male nudity as female nudity, with Michael Fassbender getting to show off more than just his acting skills. - Tom Hall

Oldboy

Park Chan-Wook’s neo-noir thriller, Oldboy, is a masterful exercise in intrigue, deception, and Asian ultraviolence. Yet at its core is a raunchy sex scene that is integral to the film’s revelatory twist. A lot of films are needlessly raunchy, but in Oldboy, it is skilfully earned. - Oscar D. Huckle

American Pie

In between gags about premature ejaculation and wanking into socks, the original American Pie movie brings us the rather mature message that actually, sex isn’t everything – positive relationships matter too. The film’s sense of humour isn’t quite as mature, but its adolescent cringiness is what makes us love it. - Ed Brown

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

James Bond and raunchiness go hand-in-hand. In George Lazenby’s only depiction of the womanising spy, Bond sleeps his way through the “Angels of Death”, engages in a classic ski chase, and marries a countess. It’s a raunchy film that symbolises the free-love attitudes of the time. - Tom Bedford

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Image: United Artists


Fashion

Campus catwalk

Rachel

Conor

Rachel’s taken varying tones of burgundy and brown and matched them together nicely! The coat in this outfit really stood out to us and is truly the central piece to this look. The scarf, although needed in this weather, is worn here well as an accessory.

The best part about heading off to the library, are the study breaks inbetween! This Model of The Moment happened to be having a break at the right time, enough for us to admire his casual and comfortable look.

Mae

Jake

Mae’s outfit is a perfect reflection of the weather at the moment: a little bit of winter with a dash of spring and summer. The headwrap really caught our eye; it compliments her skin tone so well, and what a gorgeous smile she has!

Here we have Jake who has perfectly blended class and casual The scarf provides a pop of colour, whilst the tailored grey coat is also a must-have for this season.

- Faith Ogunkeyede and Bobby Onanuga Images: Faith Ogunkeyede, Vecteezy

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Fashion

An outfit for every occasion

Whether you’re going on a date, hanging with friends or even just having a night in, the hardest part of a night can sometimes be knowing what to wear. How we dress can reveal a great deal about ourselves and allows us to show our character through the colours, patterns and cuts that we showcase daily. Certain occasions can be trickier to dress for, especially when it comes to the more formal occasions like weddings or interviews or trying to impress on a hot date. Here is a short guide to help you with tricky outfit choices and make sure you feel fab for whatever events you have coming up.

A Night Out

In Norwich, nobody ever wears heels on a night out; a smart move. Reserve your heels for society balls and special occasions. “LCR shoes” are a must. New Look do very cheap canvas shoes; perfect if you don’t want to wreck your favourite pair of Vans. “Jeans and a nice top” are such a winning combo that Missguided even have a section dedicated to it on their website. Mesh tops with a cute bralet or vest top underneath are great to keep you on trend but also make sure you keep cool on the dancefloor!

A Night In

It’s winter, it’s cold, and if you’re not living in halls anymore, you probably don’t have your heating on very often. Sometimes the best thing can be a cosy night in, by yourself or with a group of friends. Stay super casual with trackies, sweatshirts and pjs; the perfect combination for a chilled night in. Fluffy dress gowns are also a must!

Society Balls

A First Date

The best piece of dating advice I’ve received is to dress in what you feel comfortable in and be yourself. Show your personality through your clothes and wear something that is true to your own style. You will always feel more confident if you’re wearing something in which you feel good and secure in. Wear your favourite pair of jeans or a dress you absolutely love and let your accessories do the talking.

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The one night of the year in which everyone gets to dress up all fancy, so don’t let the opportunity go to waste! It doesn’t mean it has to be super expensive either. If you need to stay on the student budget, Primark and Topman do some fantastic men’s suits, as do most high street retailers. If you’re looking for a stylish dress that doesn’t break the bank, Pretty Little Thing and Boohoo online do some fantastic ones, and always have student discount (and free returns!). Have a browse of the Asos outlet as well if you want something higher end without the designer price tag.

- Charlotte Manning

Images: Unsplash @petebellis, @flaunter, Vecteezy @xiayamoon


Fashion

Suiting up

Opportunities to dress up are dangerous. You get to scrub up and show yourself off, sure, but only if you manage to sidestep all of the fashion faux-pas that stand in your way. And with our annual celebration of love and cheap chocolate rapidly approaching, many of you might be rooting around the back of the wardrobe for your ties and dusting off some old blazers that last saw the light of day at your auntie Jeans wedding six months ago. So, how do you know what to wear when? Shirts are the base layer for any smart outfit. On the whole, you won’t get past the realms of casual in a T-shirt. If you’re going for a well put together everyday outfit, a loose collar or even collarless shirt should cover it. But for anything smarter, you’re going to need a shirt that can take a tie, with a stiff collar and plenty of length to tuck in. Then you’ll need three items: a tie, a waistcoat and a blazer.

Smart Casual

You’re going for dinner with the family or with your mates at a restaurant. It’s nothing formal, but you’re celebrating, so a T-shirt seems a little too comfortable. In situations that require the minimum amount of dressing up a decent pair of jeans and a clean opencollar shirt of any colour might cover it, but to make yourself look as sharp as possible without looking overdressed you’ll want to add any one of the three accessories mentioned above. Be aware though, that though they will all work in smart-casual situations, a tie always makes things look dressier. From casual to smartest the combos go: shirt with waistcoat, shirt with blazer, shirt and tie.

Smart

You need to look good. You’re picking up a Valentine’s date in half an hour to take them to the theatre, but you can’t decide what to wear. In situations that require you to be clearly dressed up, but not looking like you run a bank, you

want to wear a smart shirt, preferably white or light blue, with good trousers and two of the accessories mentioned above. As ever, there are different levels in this category. From most casual to almost formal the combos go: waistcoat with blazer, waistcoat with tie, blazer and tie.

Formal

You’re getting ready for a wedding or perhaps you have a job interview later and you’re terrified of being underdressed. Without crossinf the line into tuxedoes and black tie outfits, you have to look amazing. Here you will need that crisp white shirt, this time with double cuffs that can take cufflinks if possible. Items like cufflinks and tie bars are good additions to spruce up an outfit, but they are not absolutely necessary if you don’t have any. The blazer and tie combo works here too, though for the more formal you’ll want to pay more attention to your colour and pattern use, mainly sticking to block colours and minimal patterns. Alternatively, you can go for the unequivocally formal; a three piece blazer, waistcoat and tie combo. This is fine for interviews and the like, but is ideal for weddings and balls. So there you have it! Who said dressing up nice was difficult?

- Sean Bennett Images: Unsplash @hengfilms, flenjoore, danedeaner

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Call the

Graduate

Venue catches up with Jennifer Kirby: once a UEA student, now a star in the new series of BBC’s Call The Midwife UEA alumna Jennifer Kirby was welcomed into Call the Midwife’s Nonnatus House at the start of 2017. Her character, East-End bar maid and ex-army nurse Valerie Dyer, is the most recent midwife to be recruited, following the departure of characters Patsy and Sister Mary Cynthia from the show. Excitingly for Kirby, this is her debut television role, aside from a small appearance in Holby City.

“[UEA] appealed to me immediately”

Call the Midwife first aired in 2012, and with more than six million viewers tuning in every week, it has long been a BBC favourite. Kirby believes the success of the show is in part the result of the “women at the heart of its drama. Sadly, there’s still not enough of that around.”

“[Call The Midwife] represents human nature and love in all its forms”

The show also deals with a wide variety of controversial social issues, including female genital mutilation, smoking, immigration, and the introduction of the contraceptive pill. Jennifer believes Call the Midwife’s ability to tackle these issues with warmth and sensitivity is a big part of its appeal: “it

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“Just wait until you get to London! You won’t know what’s hit you” represents human nature and love in all its forms. It’s very warm, but never shies away from challenging and sometimes controversial storylines.” The show has always been a favourite for Kirby, who told the Daily Mail, “When I was at drama school, I’d watch the Midwife every night.” Kirby graduated with a degree in Drama and English Literature from UEA in 2010. I wondered what it was that first drew Jennifer to study here, and she told me that “the place

appealed to me immediately.” Of the course she said, “I loved how practical the drama course was but I wasn’t ready to let my books go just yet.” But living in a house with her friends – and the low cost of renting in Norwich! – is what she misses the most about studying here at UEA. “Just wait until you get to London!” she jokes. “You won’t know what’s hit you!”

acting experience has been onstage, I wondered if the move to performing on screen had been a difficult one. “It’s been challenging and exciting,” she reveals. “Both are essentially looking for truth and believability, it’s just with screen acting you have to remember not to push it out to the back row. Let the audience come to you.”

After graduating, Kirby secured herself a place at LAMDA, the acclaimed London Theatre School, and went on to play the role of Elizabeth Bennett in Pride and Prejudice at the Regent’s Park Open Air Theatre. Since then, she has worked in New York, appearing in a series of Shakespeare plays and for the Royal Shakespeare Company. Given that most of her

Though Kirby has gone on to become successful in her acting career, during her time at UEA it was uncertain what the future would hold. “When I was in my last year at UEA I was given a tiny part in the final year production, and I didn’t get into any drama schools. But that didn’t mean anything at all,” she reveals.

“With screen acting you have to remember not to push it out to the back row”

I asked what advice she would give to aspiring UEA actors and actresses, and it seems that keeping an open mind, a relaxed attitude, and not giving up is key: “Life takes you all kinds of places, where you begin has little to no bearing on where you end up. Enjoy uni, let things go, be happy and don’t overthink things, there’s so much waiting for you on the other side, and it’s a completely different world.”

“Where you begin has little to no bearing on where you end up”

Kirby joined the cast for series 6, which aired from January 22 2017. She returns for series 7, which began on the 21st January 2018.

- Kate Romain Image Credits: Photographer – Will Bremridge, Makeup – Charlotte Wood for Lancôme

15


Music

Venue’s steamy songs Song Mino

Body As a strong confidence booster, Body is a song I always listen to when I want to feel sexy. Although sung in Korean, you can definitely feel the sensual vibe just through the music itself. This is the kind of song I want played during a romantic encounter.

Earned It

The Weeknd Considering this song was in 50 Shades of Grey, it’s not really a surprise it’s made the list, is it? With its heavy and captivating beat accompanied by sensual lyrics, Earned It peaked at #3 on Billboard Hot 100. A definite add to a Valentine’s Day playlist.

I Luv Girls

Mr Traumatik ‘I don’t do romantic stuff ’, sums up the tone of this morally shocking and depraved ode to meaningless sex. Even seasoned listeners of hardcore hip-hop will find these lyrics hard to stomach; sentimentalists will detest this track like a sickness. Obvious warning for highly graphic and explicit lyrics.

-Charlie Walker

The anti-Valentine’s playlist Baby Go Now

John Howard Produced by the legendary Trevor Horn early in his career, Howard’s beautiful 1978 lament to the inevitable departure of a loved one is a thing of abject melancholy, from the wailing string section and organ to the dramatic percussion and mournful guitar riff. A desperate breakup tale which might just make you glad to be single…

Your Love Is Killing Me

Sharon van Etten Let’s face it, you wouldn’t really turn to van Etten to cheer yourself up, but this bleak story of a stifling relationship is particularly downbeat. You’ll never want to be with someone ever again after listening to this - perfect if you find yourself alone on the 14th.

-Amy Newbery

-Tony Allen To Take You Home Careless Whisper

I Love You (B****)

Sean Price It’s unclear what kind of romantic message Price is offering on this track, but its safe to say its mostly negative. His bars alternate from unconditional love to outright insults. He balances on a thin line between a hate song and a love song, although clearly avoiding tacky sentimentality to offer something more raw and personal.

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George Michael There’s nothing as sexy as a saxophone hook, and Careless Whisper has one of the most provocative saxophone openings of all time. Even without George Michael carelessly whispering the lyrics, or the sensual rhythm and bass the accompanies it, the song would be one of the sexiest songs ever just from Steve Gregory’s saxophone caress.

Nobody Does it Better

Carly Simon James Bond themes are a gold mine of evocative songs, and the best of them fittingly accompanied sex icon Roger Moore’s most classic outing. The song couples a graceful instrumental dance with suggestive lyrics to make any listener wish they were the subject of the song.

-Tom Bedford Image: (heart) freestockphotos.biz

Frank Turner When I saw Frank in 2014 he told the story of his former French lover who dumped him as he tuned up his guitar to play To Take You Home for her for the first time. With a natty little riff (used on Countryfile almost weekly), tongue-in-cheek vocals about a tonguein-another’s-cheek kiss and a story about being dumped in Paris, it’s the ultimate not-too-negative anti-Valentine’s song.

Go Home

Julien Baker “I’ve kissed enough bathroom sinks to make up for the lovers who never loved me” croons Julien Baker in the swan song to her debut album. Soft yet hard-hitting, Go Home is a song about waking up in a ditch having drunk yourself half to death over heartbreak and depression.

-Nick Mason


Music

The Dangerous Summer: wild again When cult-status bands reunite, it can go one of two ways. They can tread the same path: this is typically met with a fleeting love of the new work they release that fades with each listen. Alternatively, they can change greatly and risk everything they have to create a great album.

hopes. On the first listen I was torn on how I felt. On the second listen I was sold. From the opener Color, it is clear that The Dangerous Summer are back on form. This Is Life gets things going at a higher pace and Fire is fantastic in the context of the album (sadly, Ghosts is the only track yet to impress me).

The Dangerous Summer have chosen the latter path. Having already created three albums I would consider excellent, including their now genre-defining debut Reach For the Sun, I would not have begrudged them a return to their original sound, the mature emo-pop that sowed the seeds of their venerated status, or even to the sound of 2013’s Golden Record. But staying still is not what the California trio do and their eponymous fourth album is all the better for it.

As the album progresses, it gets faster, punkier, and closer to the band’s early work, but with a depth and sonic power that their older releases just can’t quite match. Lyrically, musically, and cohesively the back half of the album beats the first; from the moment Wild Again kicks in until the closing notes of Infinite there’s a passion and rawness that pervades every moment. When I Get Home is probably the best poppunk song about partying to be released in years, Valium oozes with menace and grit, being the album’s heaviest cut, and Live Forever is one of frontman AJ Perdomo’s best ever vocal deliveries.

Lead singles Fire and Ghosts disappointed me, whilst the final single prior to release, Valium, rekindled my

With their comeback record, The Dangerous Summer have reaffirmed their status as one of emo-pop’s best bands. With their strife well behind them, the trio are on their way upwards.

-Nick Mason

Dream Wife: punk rock power

The phrase “dream wife” seems like something straight out of an advert from the fifties, conjuring an outdated ideal that equates femininity with domesticity. But rest assured, Dream Wife are not the past, they are the future. Thirty seconds into their debut LP and vocalist Rakel Mjöll has already screamed the title of the opening track, Let’s Make Out, four times. It’s a fun song, and wouldn’t look entirely out of place on your Valentine’s Day playlist, but it’s also an important reclamation of female sexuality. With this first song, Dream Wife’s selftitled album hits the ground running. From the sleazy guitar riff of ‘Hey Heartbreaker’ to the frantic chorus of ‘Act My Age’, and even through the softer

tracks like ‘Love Without Reason’, the energy of that first song is maintained. This album is refreshingly compassionate, wildly aggressive, and unapologetically feminine. The punk trio, which is completed by Alice Go on guitar and Bella Podpadec on bass, are at their best when they are angry. ‘Somebody’ is an anthem for consent (“What you wore and how you bore it so well / What did you expect would happen?”) powerful, poignant and, sadly, relevant. Album closer ‘F.U.U’ hits like a freight train, with Mjöll chanting “gonna fuck you up, gonna cut you up, gonna fuck you up” and guest vocals from Fever Dream who snarls something in Icelandic before yelling “I spy with my little eye bad bitches / Dream Wife for life”. This is an album that starts strong, ends strong, and

is also strong in the middle. Dream Wife are important. In a maledominated genre, they refuse to be quiet, to be the ideal that their name suggests. As recent festival line-up announcements show (cough, Wireless, cough), the music industry is still significantly skewed in favour of male artists – particularly in the punk/alternative scene. It’s not that there aren’t as many female artists, but they generally don’t receive the support and promotion that male artists do. For that reason, you should go and listen to this album. That, and the fact that it’s just very good.

-Jacob Chamberlain

17


Music

Gig proposals: cute or cringey? Cute

Cringey

There’s an image we have of romance, lifted directly from 80s movies, of the foolhardy, lovestruck Romeo-wannabe who makes a huge gesture to woo the woman he loves. Typically our budding Casanova will take an immense risk of looking like a muppet in order to prove his undying love for his better half.

Imagine the scene, heart racing, music pumping through the speakers. You’re waiting for the lights to go down and the music to begin. Suddenly a man stumbles on the stage and grasps the microphone. No, it’s not a band member, and they’re too nervous to be a part of the set up crew. The whole crowd is perplexed, it is silent and awkward. Oh God, it’s a proposal. Bent down on the sticky stage floor, ring in hand, waffling about how he and his partner are destined to be together. It is all too much. You came here for music, not for a soap opera.

Proposals have always been a matter of spectacle. Unless you are off your face on vodka at a house party and use a jokey proposal to cover for the fact you fell down and landed on one knee (yes, I am speaking from experience), they are dramatic gestures. Getting down on one knee; holding the box aloft like its Simba and this is the opening scene of The Lion King; using your beloved’s middle name, even though you know they probably hate it, is the only way to show you are serious. We find proposals at restaurants cute and lovely. There are bystanders here who see the risk of rejection, yet we still do it. A gig is no different. I would argue, in fact, it is more romantic. Many couples find solace in shared musical tastes; it’s the same reason we make a big deal about first dance songs. Where a band is willing to let someone on stage to propose, it gives a chance for that band’s music to become a permanent part of your relationship. It’s unforgettable and fits the big romantic gesture trope we all secretly want our lover to meet. As long as the band is chosen properly (why would someone propose at a The Front Bottoms concert, for heaven’s sake?) it can be meaningful and a true expression of love.

-Nick Mason

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It’s all well and good declaring your love for one another, but there’s no reason to make a spectacle out of yourself in front of hundreds of strangers. It also makes all the people at the gig uncomfortable and ruins the amazing atmosphere associated with attending a music concert. As someone speaking from experience, you feel obliged to clap and smile, even though you’d rather not. You’ve paid a good £20 to be here and enjoy yourself, not watch an extreme episode of PDA. Sure, its brilliant if your partner says yes but what if you popping the question leads to a heart wrenching public rejection and spoils all your memories of your favourite band. Every time you hear a song, suddenly you’re back standing there, all eyes on you. It’s simply not worth it.

Get Hurt

The Gaslight Anthem The title track of the band’s divorce album is a testament to the death of a long-term relationship. Brain Fallon never sounded so defeated as he does when roaring “I came to get hurt”. On an album full of anti-love songs (Halloween, Have Mercy, Break Your Heart and Dark Places all deserving a place on this list by their own virtue), this is a standout track for its sheer jadedness.

Chapel Song

Augustines Augustines’ debut is a collection of songs from a broken man. William McCarthy’s band had broken up, his brother and mother died and his relationship had fallen apart. All in the same month, August, and around his birthday. Chapel Song deals most explicitly with the relationship breakdown and is sung by a man clearly on the verge of tears. If you thought you’d heard a miserable song, wait until you hear Chapel Song.

So if you’re planning on proposing to that special someone, take a minute to think it through. A music concert probably isn’t the best place; it’s not the intimate setting your loved one imagined. It’s just cringey.

-Jess Barrett

-Nick Mason


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005


Gaming

Monster Hunter World is “beautiful and immersive” if a little empty

The Monster Hunter franchise has seen many games now, and nit-pickers will be happy to know that this is the first in which you actually hunt the monsters that you fight. Monster Hunter World is also the first game in the franchise to be aimed at a Western audience and, according to Capcom’s sales figures, this was a success. The game takes place in a fantasy world in which monsters roam the wilds. Humans, including you, hunt and kill them. The previous games suggest this is part of a larger spiritual balance between the wilderness and civilisation of the world, but that justification is brought into question in World. World’s story and marketing campaign focuses heavily on the fact that you are on an expedition to “The New World”, and the majority of the gameplay sees you mercilessly murdering the native populace. To say it has colonialist tones is an understatement. This mass murdering is easy and fun, unfortunately, because of how smooth and well-designed the gameplay is – it could be argued that this is the most welldesigned combat system ever. Fighting the monsters isn’t a battle but a dance, with the simple yet surprisingly nuanced

20

Image: Capcom Europe

controls letting you leap over and around the monsters, pirouette through the responsively-designed maps, or interact with various natural features like weak cave walls or suspended boulders to influence the events of each battle. It’s impressive how even the simplest of actions feels rewarding and dynamic. Gameplay has always been welldesigned in the Monster Hunter series, but this game more than any of the previous ones embraces the “easy to difficult, hard to master” mantra, and most weapons keep surprising you the more you use them. A function new to this game is the “hunt” part of “Monster Hunter”, in which you run around finding and following tracks before you find the monster. This gives each hunt a more natural feel that grounds players in the atmosphere and world, but it can sometimes slow down the fight when monsters run away. Beloved returning features include a cat companion who helps out in quests, and a village full of strange characters who help you prepare for each mission. The downside to the maps and monsters being so beautiful is that there are therefore fewer of them. World has

five proper locations and thirty-one monsters to fight, as opposed to the nineteen maps and eighty-one monsters of previous installation Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate. The dearth of content is understandable, as a sacrifice had to be made through striving for better graphics, but it’s still a startling contrast from previous games. There is a noticeable knock-on effect in terms of a lack of depth in the weapons and armour you can create, and the usual third tier of difficulty is missing completely along with the gameplay changes this brings. Many people hope more content will be added through free DLC, but that remains to be seen. One of the main aspects to the Monster Hunter series is the online co-op mode, in which you fight the same monsters in teams of up to four. These battles are always hectic and very rewarding, but with the choice by Sony and Microsoft to make players pay to play online on consoles, user count is rather low. Those that do play have been reporting issues in connecting to the servers, but this is to be expected upon release of any online game. Monster Hunter World is a beautiful and immersive game, and the combat far surpasses any other fantasy RPG. Players for whom World is their first dalliance with the series will find it incredible but for series veterans, the knock-on effects from the reduced content strips the game a little bare compared to previous games. In translating itself to Western audiences the game has made some great improvements, yet it seems to have lost a little of the soul that hooked its original players.

-Tom Bedford


The worst sex scenes in gaming There’s just something about sex scenes in games- they are near-impossible to get right. Whether it’s the uncanny valley lending a hand to turn the most sensuous encounters into a clumsy, unsettling mess, or interactivity feeling just that bit too awkward, it tends to come across as either heavy-handed or hilarious. Here are a couple of the worst offenders.

Fallout: New Vegas

Exclusive to female couriers who opted for the Black Widow perk, the sex scene with Benny is a cut to black with the cheesiest dialogue possible - funny to begin with, but Matthew Perry’s lifeless delivery of his lines elevates the scene to an unintentional comedic masterpiece.

Fahrenheit

One of the participants is practically a living corpse, and it’s on a dirty mattress in a train carriage in sub-zero temperatures. David Cage’s games tend to shoehorn in sex scenes, but this one takes the cake.

Dragon Age Origins

Despite Bioware managing relatively passable sex scenes in Mass Effect a few years earlier, the animations present in Origins lead to quite a few awkward encounters. There’s something uncanny about the stiff, lifeless way the character models go about their business.

Ride to Hell: Retribution An unsurprising entry for sure everything about this game falls under the “awful” category. Sex is not only presented as a bizarre reward for rescuing damsels in distress, but the game’s fully clothed humping is almost too strange to be funny.

-Amy Nash

Gaming

Indie-penchant: Hatoful Boyfriend

Let’s get this out of the way early. Hatoful Boyfriend is a Japanese pigeon dating simulator. It is a game in which you romance pigeons. You, the central character, are not a pigeon – you are a human girl who is embarking on her second year at St Pigeonation’s Academy for Gifted Students, where every other student is a bird of some sort. While the game does have brief visualisations of what the birds would look like if they were human - a mourning dove is represented by a mopey-looking young boy with green hair, for example - it doesn’t shy away from the fact that it is about dating birds. From the adorable puns (every instance of “everybody” is replaced with “everybirdie”) to a teacher fretting that he might fly into the ceiling if startled, there are constant reminders that your suitors aren’t just human boys dressed up with a pigeon gimmick. The game embraces this so eagerly and with so much charm that it doesn’t come across as creepy - it is worth noting that this is partly because the relationships the player forms are never sexual in nature. The most you’ll see from your feathered friends in that regard is a hug. Each bird has their own distinct route, which vary in tone, and they’re all given a surprising amount of development and depth in a high-camp sort of way. It’s this variety that keeps the game fresh- you can go from an over-the-top RPG in one route and find yourself in the psychological horror genre in another. While it often leans on absurd humor and has a decidedly cutesy facade, Hatoful Boyfriend actually considers the horrific implications of its premise in some detail in its final route. There are hints and glimpses here and there in the various standard routes, but once they are complete the game kicks its horror elements into overdrive as you discover that its creator, Hato Moa, really

has thought of an answer for everything. The fact that the protagonist is the only human around is only referenced sparingly in the initial playthroughs, but there is still an incredible sense of wrongness bleeding through the cracks. Why, for example, are there vistas of deserted streets and ruined skyscrapers while she is on a late-evening jog through the city? Like Doki Doki Literature Club, this darkness is hidden below a cutesy surface. Some of the content of the routes, particularly the final one, can be unsettlingly macabre, but the script is peppered with enough moments of levity that it never becomes too overwhelming. Even the most miserable of routes still include shades of humour, and the twists and turns rarely feel cheap or unearned. Hatoful Boyfriend is one of the few games that has ever made me cry, which is utterly ridiculous for a game about trying to smooch pigeons. I first played it in 2012, and still think of it first when trying to come up with otome recommendations. If you can get past its initial strangeness, it ends up being quite possibly one of the most charming and wellwritten dating sims out there.

-Amy Nash

Image: Wikimedia Commons, Pearson Scott Foresman

21


Gaming

A new normal: LGBT+ representation When I was younger, first starting out with gaming, LGBT+ people didn’t exist - at least not according to the games I was playing. All powerful gods with repetitive voice lines? Sure. Cities where everyone forgets that they are starving because you build a park? Seems reasonable. Lords of hell being trapped in gemstones by old wizards and faceless angels? Absolutely. But queer people? Nowhere to be seen. In fairness, there are some games where the distinct lack of representation is less an indication of social biases and more a reflection on the irrelevance of a supernatural, ethereal being’s gender or sexual orientation. Equally, when one is building a city from a top down perspective, dealing almost exclusively with electronic renderings of inanimate objects, the opportunities for the representation of LGBT+ groups are few and far between. There were, however, plenty of games where the opportunities for representation were there and were duly ignored. Nowadays, thankfully, things seem to have improved. LGBT+ visibility in games is at an all time high, and though I’m sure there is still a long way to go, it is encouraging to see some of the biggest names in computer gaming doing their part. Two games, in particular, and their makers, have drawn my attention in this regard; namely Bethesda’s Skyrim and Blizzard’s Overwatch. Way back in 2011, the fifth instalment of Bethesda’s Elder Scrolls game series hit the shelves to astounding acclaim. With a rich and varied lore, a stupendously ambitious engine, and seemingly unending storylines Skyrim represented a landmark in the genre. And in between the dragons, the shouting and the inexplicable floating mammoths,

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a landmark of a different kind was discovered; in Skyrim, marriage is not just between a man and a woman. Clearly, it occurred to the developers at Bethesda that it makes absolutely no kind of sense to have a world where orcs can get hitched with elves and khajiit can tie the knot with argonians (or cat people getting married to lizard people, for those of you who read the word ‘khajiit’ and thought you were having a stroke) but where two men or two woman can’t possibly live happily ever after. More than the just the fact that gay relationships are a possibility in Skyrim, a further indication of progress was that, in the game, nobody gave a crap. Seriously, there is absolutely no difference between playing a straight or a gay character in the game, and why would there be? But the fact that there was representation without drawing the player’s attention to that representation is important. This world full of glowing plants, fantastical magic and the single most annoying species of crab ever to be conceived may be completely ludicrous, but it also shows us what equality actually looks like – equal opportunity in every way AND no forced distinction between groups in society. As subtle political commentary in blockbusting fantasy RPGs goes, Bethesda nailed it. Fast forward to 2016 - Blizzard, having failed to make a longstanding project become a reality, release a first person shooter (FPS) game that they had cobbled together in just a few years. That game, Overwatch, receive an almost unprecedented amount of hype even before its public release, and has since grown to become arguably one of the biggest and most successful video games in the last decade, if not the last two.

Image: Wikimedia Commons, Flarn2005

Despite being a FPS, Blizzard went to great lengths to build a detailed lore around the world and characters of Overwatch. High quality animated shorts, online comics and in-game clues all serve to enrich the playing experience. It was one such digital comic that confirmed an LGBT+ aspect to the game that many players had already guessed; that the poster girl character of the game, Tracer, had a girlfriend. Though the revelation did attract a surprising amount of press coverage, the media coverage of the reveal was less about the fact that the character was a lesbian and more about how the way in which Blizzard chose to show it; by presenting a totally normalised, average couple of Christmas Eve. Again, like with Skyrim, LGBT+ characters were represented without being depicted as ‘other’. It is clear to me, then, that the representation of LGBT+ groups in video games has improved dramatically in recent years, as indeed has their representation in the real world. But in both realms of reality there is still work to be done. Whilst the two games that I discussed in this article have done a great job at normalising different sexual orientations, representation of other genders still seems to be missing. I believe that, in time, we will start to see video games which represent the full variety of human conditions in all of their glorious complexity. Until then, it’s worth looking back at the games that made the first steps towards representation, building the foundations for progress. It is these games that will be looked back on as landmarks in their fields, and it won’t be just because they’re fun to play. It will be because they mattered.

- Sean Bennett


Television

Tokenism: the need for all-queer shows While tokenism has arguably existed in the media we consume for a very long time, it has recently become much more acknowledged, and is finally getting the attention it deserves as a relevant issue. A few years ago, being queer meant there was barely any way to see yourself in TV shows, movies, and books. The odd ones out, like Queer as Folk, was mostly seen as precisely that: odd. Once the highly anticipated episode was over, it meant going back to all the straight shows on TV; there was no alternative. Nowadays, the situation has changed. Queer characters seem to be everywhere—and this comes with its own problems. Having only one show dedicated to queer representation is limiting, but it is something to hold on to, something stable and constant, a way of knowing that, no matter what happens, there will be queer characters until the show comes to its end. The L Word and Queer as Folk were incredibly popular because they reassured us of our existence; they were validating, and they were important. The queer characters we are presented with today tell a different story: they speak of inclusion within exclusion, of anxiety and the threat of being killed off, of being a box that gets ticked in the name of diversity and views. In the now

Illustration: Emily Mildren

infamous The 100, Lexa sleeps with her girlfriend just to die minutes after; in The Originals, the only gay character loses his boyfriend to an attack from the enemy; in Supernatural, the fan-favourite, nerdy lesbian is found dead in a bathtub. The L Word and Queer as Folk had their own ‘bury your gays’ issues, but they represented something else. When Dana Fairbanks dies of cancer in The L Word, her group of lesbian friends steal her ashes, visit the summer camp where she met her first girlfriend, and say their goodbyes. When Vic Grassi dies in Queer as Folk, his family mourn him for the rest of the show, his legacy always present and felt by the rest of the characters. They decorate a Christmas tree the way he would have wanted them to, and when this goes wrong, the pain of his loss is haunting, and a scene that is initially about Christmas decorations becomes extremely memorable. Watching Dana and Vic die prompts questions about health, age and disease, about how you will be remembered. It is emotional, but it is hopeful, the moment of death followed by love and care from the queer community. Watching Lexa and all the queer characters that stand on their own die prompts questions about

sexuality. Their deaths being brushed aside, mentioned once in the episode after and never again, hurts in its subtlety. Knowing that these characters served their purpose as the gay newcomer, the gay plot twist, the gay friend, only to be forgotten, leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. The difference between the image of your friends getting together to steal your ashes from your homophobic parents, united by a common social rejection, and that of dying alone, the odd one out, makes for a raw feeling for the queer community, one that is complex and difficult to fully understand as an outsider, or to even fully explain as an insider. This feeling is precisely the reason we need shows like Queer as Folk and The L Word to come back. We are tired of being the secondary characters, of being the only queers in the group. It is a fact that queer people tend to find each other—so let us be united again, give us an all-queer cast, let the straight people be the minority again for once. Let us die among queer friends when we do. And do not limit these friendships to clubbing and work; make us monster hunters, dystopian survivors, vampires and werewolves. Queer people are everywhere, and we want to be seen.

- Yaiza Canopoli

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Television

The steamiest TV shows Queer as Folk (U.S.) Queer as Folk (U.S.) is not just one of the ‘steamiest’ TV shows out there, but it is also one that does romance and sex incredibly well. The show follows a group of gay men and women, friends with incredibly different interests and approaches to life, and all of them intricate, believable, and absolutely amazing characters. These people are written in a way that makes it impossible to forget them; their relationships change, some of them ending with terrible breakups, they cheat, they fall out of love, but

none of this is hyped up to the extent that it becomes ridiculous. Instead, emotions are presented as something real, valid, and complicated, making all of the relationships, and even friendships and family dynamics, feel raw. Queer as Folk remains a miracle of the TV industry in its sexual diversity and honest approach to both the fun and the seriousness of queer relationships, and it is likely that no show will ever live up to it.

- Yaiza Canopoli

Game of Thrones Sex and violence form two pillars that define the indulgent and mature nature of Game of Thrones, but the uncensored nudity has been the source of much controversy due to it often being thought unnecessary and excessive. The term “sexposition” was coined to describe the abundance of sex scenes which act as a backdrop of visual stimulation to keep the audience engaged while expository dialogue is spewed. This is a rather pessimistic view as it suggests that nudity is necessary to make the scene successful

and engaging (because of course the audience would otherwise grow bored of dialogue on its own). However, on some occasions, it can work to enhance character development as seen in earlier seasons when we are shown how characters like Tyrion or Theon act in an intimate, private sphere, as well as better revealing how they treat women. Ultimately, excessive sex is just something that we have come to expect, and it can either be appealing or off-putting for a new viewer.

- Joel Shelley

Sherlock

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What list of steamy TV shows could be complete without Sherlock Holmes and John Watson? Since the launch of this BBC juggernaut in 2010, the aspect that’s really sold the show, and what any good adaption of Sherlock needs to focus on even more so than the mysteries, is the chemistry between the two leads. The pairing of Cumberbatch and Freeman instantly clicked but also led to one of the most famous shippings (‘Johnlock’) of recent history with a certain section of the Sherlock fanbase linking the two romantically, and often sexually. Copious

Images: Wikimedia Commons (Showtime), Flickr (Rob Obsidian), Flickr (TNS Sofres)

amounts of explicit fan art has been produced, and the show often frequently – and usually very self awarely – addresses this underlying homosexuality. The first episode changed the novel’s original title ‘A Study in Scarlet’ to ‘A Study in Pink’, surely a subtle reference to the questions that arise from two men sharing a flat in modern day London. While we never see anything explicit, the fanbase constantly speculate on what happens behind that closed 221B Baker Street door...

- Dan Struthers


Television

In my unpopular opinion: unrealistic sex on TV is more damaging than porn Has there ever been a realistic portrayal of sex on TV? Rack your brains and try and think of an example which doesn’t involve two perfect human beings making love to mutual satisfaction with no perspiration at all. It’s hard to think of any examples of a TV series that shatters this image of sex being a flawless thing between beautiful people and by this implication that if you don’t achieve this ideal then you are abnormal. Showing this very black and white view of sex, or in some cases suggesting that sexual incompetence is something to be laughed at, is problematic as it’s not showing everything in between. If we wanted to start a list of things that TV neglects or exaggerates regarding sex we could be doing so for a very long time. While you could argue that a lot of these things are taken out for watchability’s sake (who wants to see a sweat drenched love making session?) actually omitting some aspects may be fuelling urban myths regarding sex. From disregarding any idea of foreplay before sex to the ridiculous idea that people sweep dishes, books, and other things from the table in the heat of the moment (just think of the cleaning up),

TV has been lying to us since day one. This normalisation of this unrealistic standard of sex could disillusion many, young people in particular, into striving towards something that is ultimately unobtainable. Particularly nowadays in the age of Netflix where TV series are more accessible than ever more people are exposed to this unrealistic sex and, without any context, may be led to believe that they must aspire to that or that their current sex life is inferior to that on TV. In this regard, how we are exposed to this unrealistic portrayal of sex on TV, an argument could be made that this is more damaging than porn. Whereas porn (on the most part) is deeply misogynistic and a horrifying distortion of sex in general, it does not have the same reach or power of suggestion that TV has as everyone is exposed to the small screen on a conscious and subconscious level at some point. With the exceptions of only a few shows (which you can read about in Yaiza Canopoli’s tokenism article on page 23), most sex happens between white heterosexual couples which

is obviously not representative of everyone. This ignores different races, orientations and preferences, basically sending the message that if you don’t conform to this Caucasian straight ‘ideal’ then you don’t fit in. As a young person only being shown one race and one orientation represented on the small screen it could potentially leave you feeling alone and reinforces a problematic heteronormative and white image. TV will often never include or even reference anything relating to contraception and/or STDs which is a shame because, if used cleverly, it could be educational as well as entertaining. Offering examples on the small screen of the importance of wearing a condom or other forms of contraception could be weaved into the story easily and to comic effect or in a serious tone either way having this reminder ever present in pop culture through TV would emphasise the importance of it. Likewise, discussions about STDs could be insightful and break common misconceptions around this topic while also saving parents having to awkwardly stutter their way through the ‘birds and the bees’ talk. Not to say that this talk isn’t essentials but it would certainly save some squirming on both sides if we were more informed to start with. While I am by no means suggesting that sex should be censored from TV, I believe that writers can do more to reflect the average viewer and stop supporting these sometimes dangerous myths that have been created due to the small screen’s desire to glamorise sex.

-Dan Struthers

Image: pixabay - Prinz-Peter

25


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C. writing

Old woman on a bridge An old woman sits on the edge of a wooden train bridge, her feet dangling high above a green lagoon, looking out at the ocean. The splintered, dark wood of the bridge smells of tar and wet soot. The faint sound of a horn makes the woman look away from the sea and down the tracks. A breeze from the ocean makes her grip tighten on the metal cable she’s been clutching, pressing deep marks into the palm of her hand. With her other hand, she clutches a scrapbook closer to her breast. She closes her eyes and inhales deeply, feeling the sea breeze as it makes her hair, the color of the moon on a fresh snow, dance around her head. The breeze tastes salty in her mouth, and she sighs. She opens her eyes and looks back at the scrapbook. A picture of an older man, her husband, and her at the same beach years ago, knee deep in the water, pants rolled up but still wet, laughing as the picture was taken. The woman flips slowly through the pages of the book, past pictures and cards that seem to show a long and happy life. In a black and white photo are the man and her, younger; him in a suit and bow tie and her in a white dress with long tails and a veil, which he is lifting to kiss her, as people around them throw rice. There are pictures with her and the man sailing a boat on the ocean. There is another of them holding surfboards stuck in the sand, the ocean at their backs. Many more photos follow, with children and a dog. Then, around a Christmas tree with presents, the children ripping open boxes and emptying stockings, the man sitting back in an arm chair, smiling and smoking a pipe. Another with the couple, older and the children, older, hunting for Easter eggs outside of an enormous yellow Victorian house, in an overexposed color photograph. And more pictures of the children grown up, and their own children. One picture of a boy missing two of his front teeth off the diving board of a family pool, caught mid-air with a huge grin, seconds before he belly flops. Then pictures of the children’s, children’s birthday parties.

the bridge. She pulls herself close to one of the large vertical columns and clings to the metal cables, almost falling off of the bridge, she holds tight. Her eyes shut, wind blowing, she hugs the column until the tremor and noise have passed. She pulls herself together, bag held tightly at her bosom and turns around again towards the ocean. Nothing is left but the smell of salt and the sound of the crashing waves. The woman reaches for a miniature urn hanging from a necklace around her neck. She lifts it up and over her head and kisses the urn. She takes off the cap and shakes out all the ashes before throwing the urn towards the foaming waves. She lifts the scrapbook above her head, seeming to consider throwing it into the ocean as well. After a moment, she lowers it, looks at the cover, which has a photo of her and the old man and an inscription: Freddy and Ethel. The old woman seems to smile. She kisses the photo of the two. She whispers, “I love you” and pulls the album close and hugs it. Taking a final breathe and look around at her ocean and lagoon, she carefully walks off the bridge and back towards home.

- Peter Preciado

The woman stops on a page with pictures of her and the man at a party with banners that say, “50th anniversary!” with many of the same faces. She touches the pictures with her fingers, feels the grooves and texture across the face of the man. Crying, she softly shuts the book and ties the light blue ribbon around it into a bow, sealing it. Setting it on her lap, she looks back out at the sea. The woman softly places the scrapbook into her bag and pulls it up around her shoulder. She stands up, using the metal cables to help her. She looks out at the ocean for a long moment, taking a deep breath and then takes a step forward. She’s on the edge of the dark, thick plank of railroad wood. A horn blasts loudly, startling her and the woman sees a train about to enter Image: Wikimedia Commons, Fortepan

27


C. writing

Poem

Not a poem

Here is a book; now open its page, Its words have been read from age to age, Close your eyes; now count to three, And think of the story you most want to read. Perhaps we are jetting off for a mission in space, As the countdown begins to save the entire human race, Or maybe we stumble home on a dark winter’s night, Unaware that the ghoul upstairs lies in wait to give us a fright. A sleuthing adventure would be perfectly fine, Solving a crime whilst drinking blood red wine, Or should we indulge with a heady romance, Where eyes meet, kisses are sweet, and he asks for a dance? The tale may take us back through history, Where the scratch of a quill unravels a medieval mystery, Or sailing a pirate ship perhaps we should go, In search of golden treasure, with a cry of yo ho ho! Here is a book; see centre stage The endless possibility of a white blank page,

A bottle of wine for us to share, A blanket, some crackers and cheese And as you drowned me in cheddar squares I’d beg, “leave me alone, please” I only want one thing from you A rocket to the moon, away from your side, Maybe on that hunk of cheese I’d finally find somewhere to hide. I’ll run away to the Finnish fjords, Maybe there I could be alone, But in amongst the ice and trolls, I think you’d be at home. The Amazon rainforest is big enough Though I’d be dead within a day. In fact, those 24 hours would be. Longer than our love could stay. Your heart is like raw chicken, It’s always making me ill. Your speech like a Tesco tannoy systemInciting me to kill. Your nose, if you could call it that, Sounds like the Apollo twelve. And ears that to the side of your face Mechanically seem to meld. Your drive is something I can respect As long as it’s off the grid. The flames of your passion I can survive Provided I’m locked in a fridge. Your humour, like you, is rather dry Dusty, absent, dead. Your anger and pride defining features, The only little things in your head.

- Tom Bedford

Close your eyes; now count to three, And write out the story you most want to see.

-Isabelle Harrison

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Heart Image: PublicDomainPictures, Piotr Siedlecki, Fridge Image: Sketch Port, magicalhobo


C. writing

H after h

Hit with the hours of the day, I hurried to the quaint hut in which the vote was to take place. As I stepped over the threshold, hobbling from the hike I felt like I had just completed, I harmlessly swept my eyes across the room. The atmosphere felt cold, stale, and with a slight hint of unsteadiness – a feeling I couldn’t help but shiver at. The choice I was about to make hurled itself upon me, holding me down and hunting for any show of indecisiveness. I heard once that, historically, hundreds upon hundreds were affected by the vote made by my ancestors. This hurt to think about. I immediately brushed myself down and made my way to the booth, feeling proud and humbled as I walked past the hazy hooded figures. I knew what I had to do. A haunting voice began heckling demands at me, as incessant as a laughing hyena. “Blue, Blue, Blue, Blue, HIT THE BLUE!” “The horizon will always be Blue.” Don’t hold back. Stay hopeful. I slammed on the hated red button and, with a humungous howl, everything changed. I hurtled behind the booth as the hisses and the horns multiplied, rising hastily within the small room. Herds of the same hooded figures began to fall, evaporating as they hit the hard ground. I turned my head just in time to spy the last figure, harshly clawing at the walls as he fell. From his crumpled cloak that lay in a heap on the floor, a colossal blue snake slithered away out of the hood, and towards me.

- Saoirse Smith-Hogan

Pretty-petal flowers Pretty-petal-flowers stick needles in my eyes O’ my lovely, you witch. I fear you pollinate me oh my senses are awry; thread strings of dandelion through my skin, stitch. Your siren is your song and you sing it bloody well, Seeking crevices of new before you. Your lullaby reverse keep eyes wide shut on verse as melody sanguines eyes dripping, skew. Send out your cannons and launch it all at us; I repel them with shards of gentle broken glass; the shards that repel they dig deep into skin, yet pretty-petal-flowers you’re starting to thin.

- Gus Edgar

I don’t love love I don’t love love I quite like hate I think it’s amusing I tell all my mates Let’s watch something angry Pulp Fiction? Kill Bill? Let’s put something on With a little less chill I admit I like rom coms They’re full of hate They shout and they scream That it’s just all too late When Harry met Sally He laughed in her face When Harry met Sally All he was was hate

- Sophie Bunce Image: Pixabay, susannp4

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Gramm-atic events

Madison Square Gardens saw the 60th Grammy Awards on 28 January, the annual ceremony to celebrate the best music of the year. Music writer Finley Aitken argues that the awards ceremony didn’t live up to its high standards Established by The Recording Company as a means of celebrating the previous twelve months of both national and international music, the Grammys have ultimately become a way for major label executives to maintain the marketability of our contemporary pop stars. The awards seem to not only encourage the corporatisation of pop music, but play a major role in the effort. However, with drastic improvement in both the diversity and quality of nominees, the 2018 Annual Grammy awards suggested we may finally get a year that reflected a solid year in commercial music. Sadly this was not the case. The ceremony instead went down its usual route of rewarding acts based on accessibility and commercial success. Amongst a category crammed with acclaimed mainstream records such as Jay-Z’s 4:44, Lorde’s Melodrama and Childish Gambino’s Awaken, My Love!, the converted prize of Album of the Year went to Bruno Mars’ 24K Magic. the first of six awards won by

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Mars, including Song of the Year, Record of the Year and R&B Album of the Year. You get the feeling that if they could, The Recording Company would also flog him Best Improvised Jazz Solo Performance and Best Metal Album. To add an extra dose of irony to the proceeding, it seemed that the ceremony’s highlights were courtesy of the very acts who were snubbed from the top awards. While introducing Kesha to sing Praying (a Song of the Year nomination written about the sexual assault she experienced by her producer Dr Luke), Janelle Monáe delivered a rousing speech calling for the end of gender discrimination within the music industry. “It’s not just going on in Hollywood, it’s not just going on in Washington, it’s right here in our industry as well”. The highlight of the evening was undeniably the powerful performance given by Kendrick Lamar. As the ceremony begun a large display read the words “THIS IS A

Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons, dmileson, Clipart credit: Wikimedia Commons, supernino

SATIRE BY KENDRICK LAMAR”, providing the perfect backdrop for a medley of XXX and DNA from the Album of the Year nominated DAMN. The performance, a theatrical critique of American patriotism, tackled themes of gun control and police brutality, while also featuring an ingenious cameo from Dave Chapelle. “Sorry for interrupting, but just a reminder that the only thing more frightening than watching a black man be honest in America, is being an honest black man in America, continue.” So where does the fault of The Grammys lie? Despite a series of performances which addressed key issues in 2018, the Recording Company largely snubbed the music which best reflected the causes they now claim to support - sexual equality, racial awareness, mental health. Despite being billed as “the most diverse Grammys ever”, only one woman went home with a major award (Allesia Cara). Seemingly, the ceremony was the result of an institution trying too hard to appear “woke” merely as a means of amending past criticism. They are the embodiment of 2018 keyboard warriors, people claiming to support pressing societal matters while still turning a blind eye to them in practice. Only The Recording Company has a greater responsibility than the average Twitter user, they hold the capacity to shape an industry which rewards creative risk rather than rewarding world tours and radio play. The question is, does this really matter? Realistically most music fans remain apathetic to the Grammys and its winners. But I challenge anyone not to shudder thinking of ten more years of James Corden’s fake smile as he hands Bruno Mars his Best Metal Performance Grammy.

- Finley Aitken


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