Her Magazine: Breast Cancer 2020

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Breast Cancer Survivor, Suzanne Creech Doesn't Let Cancer Rain On Her Parade


Every Woman Wants a Bailey Box


Meet The Team

Dear Readers, The American Cancer Society estimates that as of January 2020, there are more than 3.5 million women with a history of breast cancer in the United States. This includes women currently being treated and women who have finished treatment. Most of us know someone who either has cancer, had cancer, or died from cancer. We will continue to bake meals for friends going through treatment, make hats for chemo patients, raise money, run marathons, attend funerals and remember those who fought and didn’t survive the battle. We must credit the incredible health care workers who spend their life treating breast cancer patients from pathologists, to doctors, nurses, mammographers, hospice workers, and even medical chaplains. Everyone plays a part. And we all want to find a cure for cancer. Cancer has been a mainstay my entire life as my dad worked in cancer research. A massive microscope sat atop our dining room table. My dad was talented in the field of cancer diagnostics and is credited with saving women's lives throughout the world. He was certified by the American Society of Clinical Pathologists and the International Academy for Cytology. He is credited with discoveries and improvements to the practice of Pap testing. He quickly grew to the important role of International Director of Cytology for Roche Biomedical Laboratories which today is Laboratory Corporation of America. He joined Roche Image Analysis Systems, Inc. in 1990 as a leader of its developmental cell imaging technology efforts. This company has evolved into TriPath Imaging-BD. My dad ended his impressive career, still working in the field he loved, as a Cytology Manager and Cell Morphology Specialist for CellSolutions, LLC of Greensboro. No matter what my dad accomplished, he couldn’t save my mother from cancer. He was devastated but continued to do his work to help other women survive. I will always be grateful for his work and for the many women lives he saved. This amazing breast cancer issue features incredible women like our cover model Suzanne Creech who recently dealt with breast cancer, how one survivor, Mandy Messerli navigates life during covid and a special article remembering Lee Milio who recently lost her cancer battle. You will also meet some of the incredible health care workers who assist breast cancer patients in all areas. I dedicate this issue to the brave cancer warriors, health care workers and my dad. You are all my heroes!

Christina Ruotolo

Christina Ruotolo is the editor of Her Magazine, Hot Dish writer, and a multi-media specialist at The Daily Reflector newspaper. She is active in the community, is a part-time bookseller at Barnes & Noble and a creative writing instructor. When not going 100 miles per hour, she enjoys cooking, eating out and drinking wine with friends, and is a mom to a new rescue puppy named Reyna.

Editor

Marlen Luna is a Greenville-based editorial and lifestyle photographer. When she is not behind the camera, she is a business development specialist at Hyster-Yale. Marlen Luna Photographer

Jasmine Blount is a graphic designer at The Daily Reflector. She enjoys sonic slushes and spending time with her husband & two sons, Dash and Jett. Contact her at jblount@apgenc.com. Jasmine Blount Designer

Christy Jones, also know as Coach Chris, is an improvement coach for leaders and helps them break free from feeling overwhelmed and prepares themto take their teams to high levels of performance. Contact her at www.beginmonday.com . Christy Jones Contributor

Angie Watson RD, LDN, CDE Contributor

Angie Watson, RD, LDN, CDE is a registered dietitian working in the diabetes self-management program at the Pitt County Health Department. Angie graduated with a bachelor’s degree in applied human nutrition with integrated dietetic internship in 2003. She became a certified diabetes educator in 2013 and has experience working with adults with type 1 and type 2 diabetes, teaching classes and groups, providing training and nutrition counseling. Angie is married and has a 5-year-old daughter, and likes to spend her free time outdoors sailing, camping, and kayaking. Mandy Messerli is an associate director in the office of student rights and responsibilities at East Carolina University. A breast cancer survivor, she lives in Greenville, with her husband CJ and daughter Lily. Mandy loves to receive “snail mail.”

Mandy Messerli Contributor

Contents Cover Story

7 Cancer Won’t Rain On My Parade

Inside

8 Meet Her: Nikki Hyatt 9 Her Business Spotlight: Maleku Jewelry 10 Her Health 11 Her Recipe: Healthy Pumpkin Chili 12 Her Success 15 Crossword

16 A Life Well Lived 20 Surviving COVID 22 Meet Him: Dr. William A. Ballance Jr. 24 Speak up & Break the Cycle 26 Lessons from Strong Women 28 Think Pink Shopping 30 Meet Her: Dr. Cindy Ballenger

Meet Her

31 Suzanne Creech

Contact Her

Christina Ruotolo | Editor | 329-9532 Craig Springer | Advertising | 329-9513 Jasmine Blount | Designer | 329-9606 Email: cruotolo@reflector.com

Her — October 2020

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Cancer Won’t Rain On My Parade: Breast Cancer survivor, Suzanne Creech tells her story

C

BY CHRISTINA RUOTOLO

ancer is one of those words that as soon

passed away two years ago. She had breast cancer as well as

as you hear it, you’re changed forever. It

other medical issues.

changes you from the inside out and you

After more testing, what initially was going to be a

can never go back to your original self.

lumpectomy, turned into a double mastectomy. During this

But it doesn’t have to be an end, it can be

process, I was able to get in to see Dr. White. I told her I had

a journey to a new self, to a new beginning,

been having pressure in my right side since Feb. 2020. I had

to a new future as a survivor. One such

seen my general doctor, but had not received any relief. She

survivor, Suzanne Creech recently battled breast cancer and she

decided to do a scan and that is where the lung mass was found.

refused to let cancer rain on her parade. Just a few short months

If she had not listened to me and taken the initiative to do the

ago, in the middle of May, 2020, Suzanne Creech learned she had

scan, my cancer outcome could very well have taken a different

breast cancer and thus begins her journey with cancer during the

path.

middle of a national health crisis, amid racial tensions, wildfires, and yes, even locusts. She is a bright light, a ray of hope for those currently fighting cancer, those who may develop cancer in the

What went through your mind when you heard the words cancer?

future, and survivors. I recently interviewed Suzanne remotely

“Honestly, when I heard the word cancer, it was like facing my

about her cancer journey and she was kind enough to share her

mortality. I kept thinking, I am not ready to die. I can’t leave my

personal story with Her readers.

daughters in this mess of a world we are currently living in. I have to be here to protect them. This can not be how my story

Tell me how it all started for you?

ends.”

“It all started in October 2019 when I went for a mammogram after finding a small place on my right breast. I have always had fibrocystic breasts, so I wasn’t overly concerned. After my mammogram, I had a cyst aspirated, but I still felt that area I was concerned about. Two days later, I called to let them know. I was told not to worry about it because cysts can fill back up quickly. I didn’t give it much more thought, although I did keep a check on it to make sure there was no change in size. I had a follow up mammogram scheduled for six months later. It was during this follow up that the I found out I had cancer on May 11, 2020. Due to Covid, I received the news via telephone. I remember not being able to speak for a moment, just trying to

What were your treatments? “As of now, I have had a double mastectomy and had the right middle lobe of my lung removed. I am very fortunate that my lymph nodes have all been clear. I am waiting to see if my medical oncologist (Dr. Heather White) recommends any further treatments. One very important thing I have learned through this process is, you have got to be an advocate for yourself. I am not well versed in the medical field, so I relied on what my doctors and nurses told me. If I had been a better advocate for myself, I could possibly have found my cancer six months earlier.”

catch my breath. All I could think about was my mother, who

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Her — October 2020



Tell us about how the community came together and helped you when you were in the hospital? “Cancer is a horrible disease, but there has been plenty of good that I have been able to take away from it. After my diagnosis, I automatically went into a dark place. It was because of the enormous amount of support and prayers from family, friends and even complete strangers that got me through this. People that I thought I would have heard from, I didn’t…and people I never thought I would hear from have reached out and been wonderful. You truly find your tribe. I couldn’t be upset about not hearing from friends, because people deal with a cancer diagnosis differently. I realized that it isn’t that they didn’t care, they just may not be able to find the words. And that is OK.”

Once someone has cancer, many tend to think about the negative outcomes that could possibly happen such as death. Did this thought ever go through your mind? Tell us what you were feeling and if you ever thought that would happen. “Absolutely, death was the first thing that came to my mind. Then I thought about how this journey was going to impact my family. My husband lost his father to cancer. I knew this diagnosis was going to bring up a lot of memories for him. I also watched what my mother had been through, the surgery, chemo, radiation and ultimate death. I went through a brief period of possibly not facing this diagnosis and living as long as I could without putting my family through all of what cancer had to offer. That mindset didn’t last long. I had a choice to make, either give up and die or fight this challenge that I had been presented with. I have never been one to walk away from a challenge and I wasn’t going to let cancer change that. I went through the WHY ME phase, but then I said WHY NOT ME, I can do this. I can use this cancer diagnosis as an example to show my daughters how we don’t quit when faced with adversity. I wiped my tears and decided cancer would not win. The devil would not win. At that

(my thoracic surgeon). He said those wonderful words, you are

moment, the fight began. It began with me praying for God to

CANCER FREE. The happy tears started flowing. I couldn’t believe

give me the strength to do whatever I needed to do. Asking HIM

I had beat this horrible disease. It was and is so surreal. To think

to please stand with me and my family during this process. To be

that within three months, I went from breast cancer, to lung cancer

with my husband as he took on the role of husband, wife, mother,

to cancer free just seems like a bad dream with a happy ending.”

father, provider etc. I have had my moments that I would sit in my closet and cry, then I would get up and keep going. I never wanted my children to see me cry or fear cancer. I wanted to

How did you feel? “Right now, I am still very sore from lung surgery and get tired

keep life for my family as normal as possible. Cancer had already

quickly. My mind tells me that I am ready to do certain things,

taken so much from me physically, I wasn’t going to let it send me

while my body quickly reminds me that I have been through two

into a depression and take away time with my family and friends

major surgeries in a short period of time. I am still facing the

too."

breast reconstruction surgery at the end of the month, but knowing I am cancer free makes another surgery manageable. I debated on

Tell us about the day you were told your were cancer free?

whether or not to do breast reconstruction. I know that my breasts

“Monday, August 24, 2020, I received a called from Dr. Anciano

cancer has physically taken from me. Reconstruction is a personal

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never defined who I am, but I feel like I have to get back part of what

Her — October 2020


choice and one that should be researched carefully. I had no idea how many options were available, as well as the potential negative side effects.”

In the event of your death from cancer or any other ailment, what would you like your legacy to be for your children, your family and friends? “We all die and what if we could give our messages to those around us before we go, like a living message of hope for future generations. Even before cancer, I always wanted my girls to see me as someone who would fight for what is right, even if it meant standing alone. I have never been one who ‘went with the crowd’ because it was the popular thing to do. I believe in maintaining your moral compass and never lose sight of who you are. I also want my children to know that it is OK to keep your circle small. It is so much more important to have a few good friends then to surround yourself with fake people. It took me a lot of years to figure that out, but I am much happier now.”

What has this journey taught you? "Cancer has opened my eyes in a lot of ways. Before cancer, I

...YOU ARE CANCER FREE. THE HAPPY TEARS STARTED FLOWING."

was so busy with life and trying to make a positive difference in the world, that I missed a lot of what is truly important. I now stop to listen to the birds sing, I smell the fresh cut grass, I spend more time with my family. I don’t let the little things bother me anymore and I don’t stress over what I can not change. Life can change in an instant, so enjoy every moment we have. Also, cancer has connected me with other survivors from my hometown. I would not want to go through life without these warriors. They were gracious enough to share their experiences and helped ease my fears and anxiety. We all laughed, cried and prayed together. It is a sisterhood of strength, courage, endurance and faith, that will last a lifetime. I will strive to be a beacon to others as they have been for me.”


Meet Her

Nikki Hyatt Nikki Hyatt, MSN, RN, OCN is the Outreach Coordinator for Vidant Cancer Care. She has been a nurse for 16 years, working mostly with surgical patients, providing hospice care, and administering chemotherapy. She has worked at Vidant Medical Center since 2015. Through her role as outreach coordinator, Nikki teaches community members how to lower their risk of cancer and the importance of being screened for cancer. She also works to connect uninsured community members with resources to find cancer early. Nikki received her bachelors degree in nursing from UNC Wilmington and her masters degree in nursing from East Carolina University. She has plans to pursue a career as a nursing instructor in the future. What made you want to go into the healthcare field? There are so many reasons I can think of! When I was in high school, my grandpa died of cancer. I spent a LOT of time in the hospital watching the nurses care for him. I remember back then thinking This beautiful linewhat an honor it must be to be able to care for someone during their most was designed exclusivelytimes. While others run from people in their darkest hours, nurses get vulnerable by Joanna convey her fresh,with them at the most vulnerable stages of life. totobe there unique design style that embodies her lifestyle is the of What home and family.

most rewarding part of your job? I love to interact with and teach the community. The best part of my job is making connections in the community so that people have all the information they need and are connected with resources so they can make the best decisions for their health. Last year I met a woman who was a long-time smoker. She had recently quit smoking but was still very concerned about the damage that might have been done. When I told her she would qualify for lung cancer screening and that her insurance would cover it, she burst into tears. Those are the moments I love.

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Her — October 2020


business spotlight

Maleku Jewelry Congratulations to Melaku Jewelry, the 2019 Winner of the Chamber of Commerce Small Business Leader Of The Year Award Maleku jewelry is crafted and designed by award-winning artist Ileana Rojas-Bennett, whose inspiration comes from the vast kaleidoscope of colors and textures found in the rain forests of Costa Rica. As a Costa Rican native, Ileana hopes her designs will enchant you just as the country’s paradise of colors has enchanted her family and ancestors for centuries. A distinguished jewelry designer since 2006, Ileana has won many prestigious awards, including the “Beyond the Runway” award at New York Fashion Week with Nolcha in 2010. A jewelry designer has not been the recipient of this highly coveted award in 24 years. It marks Maleku Jewelry as exceptionally and uniquely beautiful. Maleku Jewelry is carefully crafted using 22k gold, sterling silver, fine silver, copper, first quality precious stones, and gem stones. Her finished work can be found in store, on Etsy and on her website, but she specializes in much more. Ileana fashions commissioned work for her many customers and is one of the few artisans in eastern North Carolina capable of laser repairs and she cuts gem stones for her jewelry. More than this, Ileana is passionate about teaching others how to make beautiful designs themselves, and she is eager to conduct workshops and classes in her Greenville studio. Ileana Maria Rojas-Bennett was born in Costa Rica and is a descendant of the Maleku Indian Tribe. Maleku Jewelry’s tagline is “Jewelry Inspired by the Colors of the Rain Forest”. “I was fortunate enough to grow up in the home of an outstanding artist. In fact my most basic childhood memory is one of my mother’s portraits and sculptures. After completing a master’s degree in education, I moved to the United States and decided to pursue my passion for art. Beginning with stained glass, I created many eye-catching pieces before I learned to fuse glass, making dichroic glass pendants, rings and earring sets. With this inspiration it was then that I decided to exclusively create jewelry with fashion, glamour, and the modern woman in mind and Maleku Jewelry Designs was born." For more information, visit the store at 684-C East Arlington Blvd, Greenville, visit the website, www.malekujewelry.com, or call 252-756-8373

252 717 5481 684 C Arlington Blvd, Arlington Village, Greenville (Across from Buffalo Wild Wings) malekujewelry.com

Her — October 2020

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Health & Recipe

AN OUNCE OF PREVENTION:

Reducing Cancer Risk through Healthy Habits BY ANGIE WATSON Cancer is the second leading cause of death in Pitt County, exceeded only slightly by heart disease. Although the causes of cancer are multi-factorial, being overweight is associated with at least 13 types of cancer, including endometrial (uterine) cancer, breast cancer in postmenopausal women, and colorectal cancer. These forms of cancer make up 40% of all cancers diagnosed. In Pitt County, 73% of adults are overweight or obese. Let’s take a look at some ways we can help reduce cancer risk, with just an ounce of prevention. 1. An ounce of body weight Losing weight can help reduce the risk of developing cancer. Slow, steady weight loss is the key to long-term success. The recommended weight loss for someone who is overweight or obese is 0.5 to 2 pounds per week. Forget the diet plans that say you can lose 5 pounds in a week. Instead, focus on sustainable changes like decreasing portions, drinking more water, moving your body more, and consuming more whole, plant-based foods. 2. An ounce of vegetables, fruit, meat, or soda Increasing your intake of cancer-fighting vegetables and fruit can decrease your cancer risk. Aim for dark green, red, and orange vegetables, and choose fruit in a variety of colors. Most adults need 2-3 cups (16-24 ounces ) of vegetables and 1.5-2 cups (12-16 ounces) of fruit daily. Reduce ounces of meat eaten, especially red meat and processed meats. The goal for most adults is 5-6 ounces of lean

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protein daily – about the size of the palms of your hands together. Most of us get this amount in just one meal! Limit ounces of sugar-sweetened beverages such as regular soda, sweet tea, fruit juice, and specialty coffee drinks. Twelve ounces of soda contains 8 teaspoons of added sugar, exceeding the recommended daily limit of no more than 6 teaspoons daily for women. 3. An ounce of muscle Increasing muscle mass is another way to reduce your chances of getting cancer. How do we increase muscle? By moving, of course. Adults should get 150-300 minutes per week of moderate intensity exercise such as walking, bicycling, or swimming. The goal is to increase planned activity or exercise as well as focus on sitting less. Other ways to move more are to use stairs rather than an elevator, park farther away at the store, walk to coworkers instead of calling or sending an email, and increase daily steps by tracking with a pedometer or smart device. We all want to do our part to prevent cancer. Though some factors are beyond our control, preventative factors such as maintaining a healthy body weight, eating healthfully, and being more active can all help reduce our risk. Remember…”an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Angie Watson, RDN, LDN, CDCES is a diabetes program coordinator at the Pitt County Public Health Department

Her — October 2020


PUMPKIN CHILI www.theglowingfridge.com

35 MINS

VEGGIES

FRUITS

POT

INGR ED IE NTS 1/2 cup vegetable broth 1 large onion, chopped 2 cloves garlic, minced 2 bell peppers, chopped 1 28-ounce can of diced tomatoes 1 15-ounce can black beans 1 15-ounce can pinto beans 1 15-ounce can pumpkin purée 2 cups vegetable broth

2 tablespoons chili powder 2 teaspoons cumin 2 teaspoons paprika 1 teaspoon salt 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon Juice from 1 lime Toppings: cilantro, avocado, jalapeños, sriracha, crushed tortilla chips

DIR ECTI ONS 1. 2. 3.

4. 5. 6.

In a big pot, heat up the vegetable broth. Sauté the onion and garlic until translucent, about 5 minutes. Add in the bell peppers, cook another 5 minutes. Add in the canned tomatoes, beans, pumpkin, vegetable broth and spices (excluding the lime until the end). Stir until well combined. Bring to a slight boil, turn down heat and cover to let simmer about 15-20 minutes. Turn off heat and stir in the fresh lime juice. Serve immediately with your favorite toppings.

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Her — October 2020

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Success

Kimberly Purnell-Moody Kimberly Purnell-Moody has published a Workbook and facilitators guide entitled, “I Am A Masterpiece, A Workbook On Positive Self-Esteem For Youth & Youth At Heart.” The workbook serves as an encouragement tool with fun and interactive activities as well as boosting positive self-esteem. Purnell-Moody has a background in Child Welfare and teaches the importance of positive self-esteem and job readiness through the Pitt Juvenile Restitution Program. She currently works as an Outreach Specialist for TRIO, a federally funded program at Pitt Community College. For more information on this workbook or to order a copy, go online to www.kimberlypmoody.com or email kimberlypurnellmoody@gmail.com. The workbook can also be purchased at Barnes & Noble or on Amazon.com.

Carla Cannon

Carla Cannon has published a new nonfiction book, “Life After Betrayal.” Cannon’s twelfth book, Life After Betrayal is about getting to the root of repetitive cycles, poor mindsets, and self-sabotaging behaviors to break free of them. Cannon states that “too often, we have treated the symptoms which only led to temporary satisfaction where we often found ourselves back in self-destructive cycles whether through poor attitudes, toxic relationships that we settled in for whatever reason, or simply how we viewed ourselves and allowed into our lives. Life After Betrayal is a path to true forgiveness; an invitation to release the blame, shame, unforgiveness and resentment toward anyone you may still be holding an offense against. It is an invitation to snatch back your power, change the narrative, stop looking at everyone who did you wrong and access how you may have contributed. And it will serve as a lifeline to many as well as an answered prayer.” For more information or to buy a book, visit the website, www.carlacannon.com. 12

Her — October 2020


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Her — October 2020

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Contact Christina Ruotolo to find out more! 252-329-9532

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Celebrating Life’s Special Moments Since 1912

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Her — October 2020


Her — October 2020

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A LIFE WELL LIVED:

REMEMBERING THE LIFE OF

I

BY CHRISTINA RUOTOLO & LEE MILIO

n March 2019, 51-year old Lee Milio was living her

she offered up silver linings to every dark cloud that came her way.

life, caring for her daughter, Jackie and teenage son, Keaten. Just eight classes short of realizing her

April 14, 2019: I’m not going to lie, I am very scared!! My world has

dream of earning a college degree, she found a lump

been turned upside down in two weeks... But more than anything, I

in her right armpit. On April 5, 2019, a biopsy revealed

am worried about how this is going to affect Jackie and Keaten. We

metastatic duct carcinoma of the breast. One word,

are so blessed that Jackie is coming to stay with us for 10 days. She

cancer, turned Lee’s life upside down.

will be here for my first treatment, and be able to spend time with

I was scrolling through Facebook on April 14, 2019, which

her little brother as he’ll be on spring break! On April 5th, I decided

was the birthday of my deceased mom and I found Lee’s group

I’m going to identify silver linings as often as possible throughout

called “Lee’s Silver Linings.” I started following her posts and even

this journey. Every cloud has one... you just have to look for it!

in her darkest hours, her words radiated hope, beauty, and peace. I was so taken by her truth serums that she offered up as she turned

April 17, 2019: Profound... this accurately describes the fear and

lemons to lemonade and smiled through cancer’s many facets.

anxiety that I feel. The hardest part right now is not being in control

Followers got to know Lee and journey with her through tests,

of my own body. I’m used to running my own life. Now cancer is

treatments, elation, devastation, and eventually more setbacks.

running it for me. I know I should give it all to God and let the

Lee shared her personal cancer struggles all the way until the very

worries go. Truthfully, I’m struggling with that.

end. She fought a long and hard journey and died peacefully with her family by her side on August 20, 2020. I wanted to share some

May 6, 2019: One month ago today, I received the diagnosis that

of her posts so others can see how brave and resilient Lee was as

would change the path of my life. I’ve already had my first dose of

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Her — October 2020


chemo on 4/24 and physically, I’ve felt much better than expected.

fine. One minute I was listening to the sermon and the next, I was

I went back to work, and life felt semi-normal, until today when my

waking up after passing out. My dad, mom and many kind women

hair started falling out. It’s only day 10 after first chemo. I knew it

were wiping vomit off of me. My doctor ordered a brain MRI just to

was inevitable but didn’t expect it so soon. It isn’t the hair; I know

be safe. (The) doctor said it was a “vasovagal episode” and most likely

it’s temporary. Rather, it is the tangible evidence that the past

due to dehydration. We all know that tomorrow is not promised, but

month has not been a “bad dream,” that I kept hoping I would wake

I’ve had to think about that reality a lot more lately! In a peculiar

from. It is the tangible evidence that the chemo is coursing through

way, having cancer is a “gift.” The gift is that I appreciate my family,

my body in an attempt to kill the cancer cells. It is the tangible

my friends, my life more than ever before. I think I was already a

evidence that my “fast-growing cells” are being destroyed by that

grateful person who did not take things for granted... but having

same chemo. It is the beginning of many changes, far deeper than

cancer has taken it to a whole new level!” Silver Lining: The vomit

hair loss. In one month, I’ve experienced fear that I never knew, and

washed out of my wig easily!

cried more tears than I want to admit. In that same month, I’ve felt overwhelming love and compassion from family, co-workers, and

September 19, 2019: Chemotherapy, despite its ugliness,

friends near and far. The emotional turmoil of this last month has

WORKED! MRI and CT scan show three out of four malignant lymph

been worse than any physical pain so far. Sharing my feelings out

nodes are GONE! The largest one shrunk from 3.1x3cm to 1.5x1cm

loud has really helped me in so many ways. Silver Lining: The next

Everything else looks good with no new areas of concern! Praise

year is going to be tough, but I will get through it, and I’m confident

God! Now a few weeks to “rest” before surgery and radiation.

I will end up even stronger than I was before! October 18, 2019: “Surgeon just updated us and it’s AMAZING June 15, 2019: This girl ain’t going anywhere! Last Sunday, four

news! While the doctor had anticipated finding cancer in the first

days after my fourth chemo infusion, I was sitting in church, feeling

lymph node removed, there was NONE! So instead of removing

Her — October 2020

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1/3-1/2 of her right side axillary lymph nodes, they only removed three more! CANCER FREE!”

did two CTs and she was admitted this morning for excess fluid on her brain. This is a normal complication of her craniotomy. If

Lee enjoyed months of being cancer free. She smelled the flowers, enjoyed her family and found out her daughter was expecting Lee’s first grandchild. Lee was excited for her future and watching her son grow into a man. Sometimes life doesn’t always work out the way you want. Lee would find early this year, in the middle of a worldwide pandemic as her daughter was 32 weeks pregnant and her son was navigating home schooling, that her life would be turned upside down again.

fluid can get out, bacteria can get in, so they will keep her in the hospital on antibiotics for a few days to monitor.” Silver linings: Fight potential infection, give her more medicine to counteract the steroids and help her sleep! Also no trip to OR today as originally feared. May 24, 2020: Six weeks ago my life was irreversibly altered when three tumors were found in my brain. My Stage 2 breast cancer has spread. I now have Stage 4 BC metastasized to my brain. I

April 16, 2020, post from Jackie: Hi everyone. Cancer is certainly a roller coaster. We were thrilled with the news that mom was in remission after her lymph node removal surgery in October! U n f o r t u n a t e l y,

this morning for cerebrospinal fluid leakage from her incision. They

two

am so blessed that the three tumors were completely removed. Unfortunately, Stage 4 BC is considered incurable, only treatable. I will be aggressively monitored and treated as needed. Some might look at my diagnosis as a “death sentence.” I choose to see it as a “License” to LIVE with purpose and

weeks ago she started

passion, to find JOY in everything, and to

experiencing dizziness,

take chances and do the things I’ve always

nausea and headaches so

wanted to, but put off til “later!” I’m not

doctors did a brain MRI...

going to lie; I’ve cried a lot in the past

They discovered three cancerous tumors on her brain meaning she now has Stage 4 Metastatic Breast Cancer. They can treat the tumors, but there is no cure. She was admitted to the cancer center so they could give IV steroids to reduce brain swelling and monitor her. There is a 3.2

six weeks. I was in a very dark, sad and

..I HAD TO SURRENDER MY WORRIES TO GOD...."

x 2.4 x 2.1cm tumor inside

girl britches and I am ready to enjoy the ROSES, despite the thorns. My son turned 17 today and my daughter is due with her first baby in 3 weeks. I am so excited to hold my first grandson! I will be truly GRATEFUL to see my son turn 21, and my grandson turn 3. But I’ve reconciled myself with my new reality, and will appreciate each day/month/year I’m given with a full and happy heart! Please join me in

cerebellum and two smaller

Celebrating LIFE today and EVERYday! ”

tumors on parietal and frontal lobes of her brain. Her brain surgery will be April 20th. April 17, 2020, post from Jackie: Mom is back in her room resting and waiting for food. The gamma knife surgery went great! Her craniotomy is still scheduled for Monday to remove the big tumor in her cerebellum.

June 9, 2020, post from Jackie: I’m overwhelmed by all your love shown! I am so grateful and humbled by your support! Today I had dose No. 8 (of 15) of whole-brain and low-spine radiation and biggest side effect is fatigue. My bone scan results came back negative... thank God! Please keep praying and sending those positive vibes! I’m not giving up!

April 21, 2020: Yesterday, I had to surrender my worries to God. I asked God to give the strength and guidance to Dr. Lee and his team so they would do what is best for me. He resected the entire golf ball- sized brain tumor all in one piece! I am so humbled and grateful for this amazing result! I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know that whether I live for one more month or 10 more years, I am going to LIVE my BEST LIFE! Thank you SO MUCH for all the prayers, support, and good vibes sent.

Three days before Lee’s grandson, Beau, was born they found out there were new tumors in her brain in addition to tumors on her spine and in hercerebrospinal fluid. It’s called Leptomeningeal Carcinomatosis. August 2, 2020, update from Jackie: Mom has been having more pain the last few weeks and new MRIs show new cancer growth in her cerebrospinal fluid surrounding the brain and spine. She has

April 27, 2020, post from Jackie: We took mom to the ER at 1:30

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angry place. But, I’ve pulled up my big-

already completed five (out of 15) radiation treatments to the whole

Her — October 2020


spine. Due to the overall effects to her central nervous system, they are keeping her as an inpatient at the cancer center for the next two weeks. She will continue the radiation, physical and occupational therapy and they will closely monitor her decreased mobility and help control her pain.

OH SHIP!

August 13, 2020, post by Jackie: Today Mom was transported from the hospital to the inpatient hospice house. The leptomeningeal disease caused by the breast cancer has progressed

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despite aggressive treatments. They are keeping her comfortable and out of pain. August 26, 2020, post by Jackie: “Your wings were ready, but my heart was not.” On August 20, 2020, Mom got her angel wings. She didn’t lose a battle with breast cancer. She fought until the very end, but cancer is a thief. It robs you of energy and tries to take your hope and joy. Since her diagnosis 16 months ago, Mom took on every challenge with a positive attitude, always finding the silver linings along the

The place you go when you forg got!

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way. She always chose joy! I know so many people were touched by her beautiful smile and soul. My brother and I are honored to have been able to be with her (on) good days and bad days. She taught us what it means to be strong in the face of adversity. She won in the end because now she has forever peace. We will miss her more

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than words can describe, but she will always be in our hearts.

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The outpouring of love and support from family and friends was insurmountable after Lee’s death. Prayers and messages of love rained in as Lee’s Silver Linings sparkled in the dimness of death. I wish I had met Lee in person. I did speak with her on the phone a short time before her death and told her I was following her journey and it was inspirational. Shortly after our quick conversation, she passed away. Lee Milio was a breast cancer warrior and even though she lost her fight on Earth, her silver lining journey is now above and beyond our realm. She is free of pain and at peace. I thank her daughter, Jackie for allowing me to share her incredible journey of truth through breast cancer. May each of the cancer warriors always remember to look for the silver linings because as Lee said, “Every cloud has one... you just have to look for it!”

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Her — October 2020

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SURVIVING

A Breast Cancer Survivors’ Perspective Of Why I’ve Stayed Put BY MANDY MESSERLI

I read an article in March 2020 about Sundee Rutter, a breast cancer survivor and single mother of six who died due to COVID-19. That article spoke to me. It was real for me. Maybe it was real for me because I am a mother. Maybe it was real for me because I am also a breast cancer survivor, but it was real for me. That same day I made the request to begin working from home. I’ll be honest. I was scared. At the time, I didn’t know anyone who had COVID-19. I just knew by reading that article and listening to the news that our lives would be different for the next few months. My husband and I made the transition to work from home, removed our child from daycare and hunkered down. It was a particularly weird time in our lives, as it was for many people. Going to the doctor was like something out of a science fiction novel. They all had masks,

some had gowns on, and they looked more like they were going into major surgery than an oncology checkup. Even though the experience was a little different, my care was never in question. I have been so lucky to have a great group of doctors. For the first time in my entire life, I can tell you every single place I have been for the last six months. Being an extrovert, it’s strange to not go out to dinner, meet a group of friends, attend a barbecue, graduation, or go into the office every day. I wish I could say that during quarantine I picked up a hobby or organized all my closets. However, I did make and donate more than 100 masks, so I guess that is something to be proud of. Mostly, I just survived. One of the hardest parts for me has been having to continually explain to people why we are being safe, listening to our doctors, watching the science and following the “stay-at-home” orders. There was so much information coming in that it was hard to

"I’ve canceled trips and will continue to stay in and stay safe..." 20

Her — October 2020


keep up with what was current or yesterday’s news. However, what I do know is that being a cancer survivor meant being a little more careful than other people. Cancer treatment is not the same for everyone. My treatment consisted of five surgeries, 16 sessions of chemotherapy, 33 radiation sessions, lymph node removal, hours of physical therapy and countless doctors’ appointments. Due to my compromised immune system, we made the decision to stay in, to keep our circle very small, and to manage as much as we could manage. When North Carolina moved from Phase One to Phase Two, for a moment we attempted to expand our social circle. We soon realized that was not a good idea as others were not taking the same safety precautions. This was a hard decision as we wanted to get back to some sense of normalcy. My opinion was that it was irresponsible to go out and act like the pandemic never happened. The responsible thing was to stay in, to again tighten up our circle, wear a mask, and wash our hands. Since the day in March when I asked to stay home, a lot has changed. I now have known people who have had COVID-19

and unfortunately a few who have died. Am I still scared? Maybe not as scared but still concerned. I’m grateful there is more information to assist with making decisions. However, I’m still working from home and will be until at least the end of 2020. I’ve canceled trips and will continue to stay in and stay safe. Is everyone making the same decision to stay in? No, and that is a decision, but if you spent as many hours fighting cancer as I did, you would take every precaution you could to see as many of your child’s milestones as you could, wouldn’t you? So please wear a mask, practice social distancing, and wash your hands. Mandy Messerli is an associate director in the office of student rights and responsibilities at East Carolina University. Mandy is a wife, mother, friend and fierce advocate. Mandy loves to send and receive “snail mail.” In 2017, Mandy was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer and confronted her treatment with a check list and lots of positivity! Mandy lives in Greenville with her husband CJ and daughter Lily.

To all those fighting the battle of Breast Cancer, the family at Congleton Funeral Home prays for strength during your time, for it effected our mother who lost the battle in OCT. 2000

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252-355-9995 Her — October 2020

21


Meet Him

Dr. William A. Ballance, Jr. Dr. William A. Ballance Jr. is the Owner, President, and CEO of Greenville Pathology, P.A. Dr. Ballance was born and raised in eastern North Carolina in Fremont, and received a Bachelor of Science in Chemistry from East Carolina University. He went on to also receive a MD from East Carolina University. He did his pathology residency at Case Western Reserve University Institute of Pathology in Cleveland, Ohio, and a Surgical Pathology Fellowship at the University of Texas, M.D. Anderson Cancer in Houston, Texas. He returned to Greenville in the summer of 1989 and began his career with Roche Biomedical Laboratories. Dr. Ballance is boarded in Anatomic & Clinical Pathology, as well as Cytopathology. In the summer of 1997, he decided to open a privately owned full-service pathology laboratory that would serve eastern North Carolina with the highest quality care, with a personal touch. The dream became a reality when the doors to Greenville Pathology, P.A. opened for business on January 1, 1998. Dr. Ballance has received the Top Doctor award in Pathology in North Carolina from 2013-2020.

“It’s nice in a small town knowing your patients. They are eager to take control of their health and well being. We think people in Farmville like to know their pharmacists on a personal level, Angell and I know there is a need for these services.” Staci Garner, Co-Owner, Pharmville Drug

Pictured on Left ft: t Staci Garner Pictured on Right: Angell Dawson

We also offer Hershey’s ice cream, nutritional supplements, and have gifts for everyone!

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Her — October 2020


Purple Cowboy Wine was inspired by the ranching and western heritage of the Central Coast of California and the Paso Robles region. Purple Cowboy and Clayhouse band together in support of Tough Enough to Wear Pink -the western community’s campaign to fight breast cancer. They have raised awareness and funds since 2004 reaching $32 million dollars.

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252-378-1100 Her — October 2020

23


October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

BY CHRISTINA RUOTOLO

Now is time to take a stand. Support survivors and speak out against domestic violence.

How do you know is someone is being abused? The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence compiled a list below of some of the red flags and warning signs of an abuser which include but are not limited to: • Extreme jealousy/ Possessiveness • Unpredictability/ A bad temper • Verbal abuse / Extremely controlling behavior • Antiquated beliefs about roles of women and men in relationships • Forced sex or disregard of their partner's unwillingness to have sex • Blaming the victim for anything bad that happens • Sabotage or obstruction of the victim's ability to work or attend school • Controls all the finances • Abuse of other family members, children or pets • Control of what the victim wears and how they act • Demeaning the victim either privately or publicly • Harassment of the victim at work

What is Domestic Violence? Domestic violence (also called intimate partner violence (IPV), domestic abuse or relationship abuse) is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship.

In Greenville, NC, the Center for Family Violence Prevention, located just steps from the Pitt County Courthouse at 111 E. Third Street, is a nonprofit organization focused on the intervention and prevention of domestic violence. Their mission is to break the cycle of domestic violence while enhancing individual self-

October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, which first began in 1981 by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence as a Day of Unity to connect battered women's advocates across the country. Every minute, it is estimated that 20 people are victims of intimate partner violence. That means in the time it takes you to read this article, 100 people will be assaulted. According to the CDC, one in four women and one in seven men will experience physical violence by their intimate partner at some point during their lifetimes. About one in three women and nearly one in six men experience some form of sexual violence during their lifetimes. Domestic violence is a serious and challenging public health problem. Annually, over 1500 deaths in the United States are a result of domestic violence. It is estimated that nearly three out of four Americans personally know someone who is or has been a victim of domestic violence.

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Her — October 2020


awareness month sufficiency and promoting health family relationships in the community. The Center for Family Violence Prevention is a private, nonprofit agency with offices in Pitt, Martin and Washington Counties. They are primarily funded by state, federal and local grants, donations from their local community and funds raised at their two local thrift stores, My Sister’s Closet and My Sister’s Attic. Through this funding, the Center for Family Violence Prevention provides resources and services to approximately 1000 victims of domestic violence and their families per year. The most serious concern is the immediate safety of victims who reach out for help. The New Directions Safe House is an emergency shelter for abuse victims and their children. They provide individual case management, counseling, support groups, food, clothing, advocacy and referrals to other agencies in the community. Roughly 5,500 square feet, the Safe House facility has the capacity for 26 victims and children. The facility has a community kitchen, bathrooms, kids' center, gathering room, conference room, playground, offices and waiting area. In

addition, there is a computer area that is available for the residents to research opportunities for housing and jobs and for children to do schoolwork. Last year alone, the Safe House hosted 117 victims and children under their care. The average stay is about 60 days. The Center for Family Violence Prevention provides a variety of services to assist those in need. Services include advocates who provide necessary support and resources for those who must go to court for domestic violence protective orders (DVPO, restraining order, or 50B), and/or to testify in criminal proceedings. They assist with crisis intervention, safety planning, case management, referrals for legal assistance, victim compensation claims and emergency financial assistance. (Advocates cannot provide legal advice but can assist in navigating the court system). Other services include individual and group counseling. Their counselors are trained in several specialties, including traumafocused care, anxiety disorders (e.g. PTSD, social anxiety, phobias, panic disorder, generalized anxiety, OCD), domestic violence relationship issues, bipolar disorder, depression, LGBTQ issues, grief and loss and many others. Counselors also assist clients with regaining self-esteem and developing stress management and assertiveness skills. Their Family Center provides a safe place where children are given the opportunity to develop the best possible relationships with both of their parents. Family services include supervised visitations, monitored exchanges, children’s counseling and parenting classes. The organization also offers educational information for teens through their CATCH program (Caring for Abused Teens in the Community and at Home) which is a high school curriculum designed to address the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. This program is designed as a tool to prevent teen dating violence and future domestic violence relationships. Most agency services are provided at no charge to the victim and are provided in both English and Spanish. On October 1st the organization is hosting a Domestic Violence Impact Virtual event to teach more about domestic violence, agency services, and what we can do as a community to eliminate this deadly problem. Log onto their website, www. c4fvp.org to view this powerful presentation if you missed the original showing. If you are living in fear from an abusive relationship, call the 24-hour crisis line at 252-752-3811 for immediate assistance. For more information or to schedule services, call 252-758-4400 or visit the website, www.c4fvp.org. Help is just a phone call away.

Her — October 2020

25


Advice

LESSONS FROM STRONG WOMEN BY COACH CHRIS

October is breast cancer awareness month and I want to dedicate this article to a few strong women that in my life who have gone through breast cancer. Those ladies are my older sister Patrice Hinton (lives in Hempstead, New York), my “Ace” (as I call her) Niecy Jones (lives in Raleigh), and two of my dear sister-friends (as I call them) LaTonya Nixon and Angela Sauls (both live in Greenville). These ladies have a strength that is indescribable! As a woman, we wear so many hats. We are daughters, wives, sisters, mothers, aunts, friends, CEOs, entrepreneurs, editors, coaches, mentors, homemakers, writers, judges, physical therapists, strategic planners, nurses, city planners, social workers, teachers, bus drivers, pastors, journalists, engineers, doctors, lawyers, hair stylists, nail techs and the list goes on and on. We do a lot, and our roles are valuable! Sometimes when you wear a lot of hats, it can be devastating to receive a diagnosis that seems to threaten to take away your opportunity to wear a hat at all. Cancer is no joke and it can be life-altering. I have never personally experienced cancer in my body, but I have seen several of the strong women in my life meet breast cancer head on, and I have learned a few lessons from their journey that I want to share with you today. Be encouraged if you are on that journey right now. All the ladies that I know that have battled breast cancer have shared with me the following themes and strategies that helped them as they were walking along their path:

1.

Faith

One of the major things that each of the ladies shared was having faith in someone stronger and more powerful than cancer. They expressed believing in the fact that they could pray to a source of power higher is what gave them a strength to make it each day. They all said their faith in Jesus Christ made them strong through it all.

2. Family Having access to a support system was critical for each of these ladies. They all live by the words of Pastor Trev Evans of Koinonia Christian Center: “We were not made to do life alone.” They all stressed the importance of having meaningful conversation and strategic quality time with family and friends.

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3. Fun Each of the ladies agreed that they had to make fun a priority. They all said that they could not allow a diagnosis to determine the course of their lives. As a matter of fact, LaTonya had a “hair cutting party” where she had a group of friends over, played music, had her favorite foods, and cut her hair off when it started falling out. It was a great time!

4. Future The ladies also shared with me that keeping the future in mind was critical for them. They each have children, and they were determined to set a path of hope for them regardless of the outcome! They shared with me a resource that gave them hope. It is a book called “No Way to Lose” by Bishop Rosie S. O’neal of Koinonia. It is a great book! You can go to her website www.rosieoneal.com and purchase it or you can purchase it on Kindle and Amazon.

I want to say to anyone who is going through a tough time right now with cancer, please stay encouraged. Make each day as special as you can and do what you love to do. You have people who are rooting for you and supporting you through this journey. Know that there are people who are praying for you — that you may never ever know their name or meet them face to face. That’s just how special you are! Christy Jones, also known as Coach Chris, is an improvement coach for leaders by helping them to break free from feeling overwhelmed and equipping them to take their teams to high levels of performance. Contact her at www.beginmonday.com.

Her — October 2020


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Proudly serving clients in eastern North Carolina for more than 18 years. Real Estate Law Residential & Commercial Steven R. Jones, Attorney at Law The Jones Law Firm, P.A. 117 West 4th Street, Greenville North Carolina 27858 Telephone: (252) 758.1212 Facsimile: (888) 600.9624 Email: loandocs@jones-law.net Website: www.jones-law.net

You Deserve a Better Mammography 40% increase in cancer detection. Fewer false alarms. Less anxiety. We Offer 3D Mammography. Greenville Women’s Care offers the best technology to diagnose breast cancer earlier and more accurately with 3D Mammography in our office. Call our office to schedule an appointment today.

252-757-3131 | 2251 Stantonsburg Road Greenville, NC 27834 Her — October 2020

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Shopping

Think Pink

Shopping Page Sterling Silver & Stainless Steel Hope Ribbon Bangle Bracelet Set with a created Pink Zircon Robinson Jewelers (www.robinsonjewelers.com)

"Dear Friend: Letters of Encouragement, Humor, and Love for Women with Breast Cancer" by Gina L Mulligan A beautiful collection of handwritten letters that offer strength, encouragement, and comfort to women living with breast cancer. Barnes & Noble (www.bn.com)

Smathers & Branson Breast Cancer Ribbon Needlepoint Key Fob Lautares Jewelers, Greenville (www.lautares.com)

Simply Southern Large Hot Pink Eva Tote Bag Made of water resistant material for easy cleaning. Features removable handles, holes for charms, a grip bottom design, and a clear, removable zipper pouch attached to the inside. Shimmer Boutique, Greenville (www.shimmerboutique.com)


Ladies, It’s Time to Glow Pink: Beauty Bar Medispa is Giving Away a FREE Facial and Latisse lash growth Serum Give the gift of glowing skin to someone you know going through cancer treatments by entering them for a FREE Glow Facial plus a FREE 5ml bottle of Latisse lash growth serum (a $300 value) How to enter: email Cindy@beautybarmedispa before October 29th– provide us with your name and phone, as well as the name of the person you are nominating and why. You and the winner will be notified October 30th. There is also a special gift for you to thank you for nominating a friend. (BeautyBarMedispa.com or 252.752.1406)

Purple Cowboy Wines These wines are inspired by the ranching and western heritage of the Central Coast of California and the Paso Robles region. Purple Cowboy and Clayhouse band together in support of Tough Enough to Wear Pink –the western community’s campaign to fight breast cancer. With every purchase of Purple Cowboy Wine, receive a FREE mini bottle of olive oil or vinegar. Simply Divine Oil & Wine (www.simplydivineoilandwine.com)

Beautiful Shades of Creamy Lipcolors This beautiful shade of creamy lipcolor is one of the many lipstick colors by Merle Norman Cosmetics, located in the Arlington Shoppes Greenville. Merle Norman offers free sanitary try-ones of all colors and products. (For more information, call (252)-756-8404)

Bubblegum Pink Volcano Candle Our Bubblegum Pink Volcano Candle is sure to brighten your day with an amazing fragrance and a pop of pink! It’s So Wright, Greenville (www.itssowright.com)


Meet Her

Dr. Cindy Ballenger Dr. Cynthia Ballenger, MD is a Radiation Oncologist in Greenville, NC, where she has been on staff at Vidant Medical Center since 2008. She graduated from University Of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, School Of Medicine with honors in 1995, completed her residency at UNC in 2000 and is on staff at several UNC-affiliated hospitals, yet she remains an avid N.C. State fan! In addition to deriving great joy from her work, Dr. Ballenger loves spending time with her family, going to the beach and attending sporting events. What made you want to go into the healthcare field? I love people and taking care of them. By the age of five, I knew I wanted to be a physician. My uncle is a psychiatrist, and I was going to be just like him. With time, I realized there was a component of psychiatry in every specialty. In medical school it became clear Radiation Oncology was the perfect place for me! What is the most rewarding part of your job? The most rewarding part of my job is definitely meeting, caring for and loving my patients and their families. I feel truly blessed to be entrusted with their care. I do my best to make each patient's journey as smooth as possible through the otherwise difficult, scary waters of a cancer diagnosis and treatment. Curing patients and improving the quality of life in those for whom a "cure" is not possible are both important aspects of my job. When someone cannot walk or sit due to pain, and after treatment, they can do these things comfortably, I consider it a huge success.

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Her — October 2020


meet

SUZANNE CREECH

49 | Pitt County Private investigator

Tell Me About Your Family: I have been married to Brent Creech for 15 years. I have three daughters, Jessica (27), Kyndall (15) and Bailey (12). What Is Your Anthem? “Fight Song” by Rachel Platten Signature Scent: Prada Favorite Food: Steak Favorite Motivational Quotes: “Being challenged in life is inevitable; being defeated is optional.” - Roger Crawford

Her — October 2020

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