Ask The Experts Relationship, money

Team emerald greens and golden metallics to create this luxury look Go GLAM

Palm leaf side table, £55, Sainsbury’s

Flynn accent chair, £199, JD Williams

Green Black 114 interior eggshell paint, £30 per 1l, M&L Paints

Plush throws Layer these rich green blankets and quilts on your bed.

Supersoft throw, £12, Primark

Faux mohair throw, £30, Cult Furniture Marble floor lamp, £95, very.co.uk

Deco bedspread, £30, Morrisons Shelf, £18, George Home

Round wall mirror, £17.99, velvet cushion cover, £6.99, metal table lamp, £79.99, cotton duvet cover set, £39.99, all H&M Home

Homes

Lavish lamps

Give your home a glow with these sparkly lights.

Green lamp, £15, George Home

Chevron lamp, £15, Morrisons Fringe lamp, £20, George Home

Word ornament, £10, Morrisons

Frame, £5, Primark

Velvet cushion, £35, Cult Furniture

Spiced honey and saffron candle, £6, Primark

Mirror, £8, Morrisons

Ask the EXPERTS

Solve your family dilemmas with expert advice Ask SUZIE

OUR SON GAVE EVERYTHING UP Q My son did well at school and university, landed a good job and prospered, but about three years ago, he suddenly gave it all up. He moved out of his flat, started ‘sofa surfing’. We gave him his room back (my sewing room for 10 years!) and he’s stayed. He’s had a series of temporary jobs, doesn’t pay us anything and he shows no intention of making any more permanent arrangements. He seems content, and says that he did it because he decided it was a mug’s game paying taxes to a greedy government. We love him but we’ve had enough.

Suzie says A Tell him you’ve had enough of the mug’s game of looking after a fully functioning adult as if he were a child. Be careful that you aren’t dealing with someone masking a mental health problem under apparently cheerful denial. Insist that he sees his doctor for counselling to make sure he isn’t suffering from depression. But if this isn’t the case, and his behaviour is simply the result of realising you will pick up the tab, call him out. Give him notice and tell him you expect him to go back to having to make a living like the rest of us. First, he starts helping around the house, then he gets a job and his own place and if he won’t, he’ll be back sofa surfing.

Should I revisit the past? Q I was in love for many years with a man I worked with. We were both single when we met but I never had the now wishes he had and would like to meet. I don’t feel the same but I wonder if I should meet him, if only to lay the past to bed.

Cheerful denial could be a mask for a mental health problem

SHE’S MAKING EXCUSES FOR HIM Q My parents are in their late 70s and a few years ago, when they retired, they moved to an area with friends who are also retired. It has the most amazing opportunities to socialise and join clubs and events –my mother is in her element. The problem is my father, who has always been grumpy, wants nothing to do with it. He just wants to sit at home

courage to approach him. I left to work elsewhere, met a wonderful man and we’ve been happily married for 30 years. I was quite shocked to receive a message on a social media site from this man. He said he was always in love with me but too shy to say so, and

GET IN CONTACT Write to Suzie at Family Dilemmas, 161 Marsh Wall, London E14 9AP, or you can send an email with your personal problem to asksuzie@ti-media.com; You can also write to Dr Philippa, Linda and Susan at the postal address above or send them an email with your problem to woman@ti-media.com

Suzie says A The brilliant thing about social media is that you really don’t have to respond, at all. He has no call on you and you have no responsibility to him. You could simply message back saying, ‘Thank you but no thank you.’ Or you could ignore it. I might wonder what has happened in his life that has now made him think of you. But you don’t have to. You are happily married and I can see no good that could come from seeing him. watching TV or reading. Does she go alone and make excuses for him?

Suzie says A Support her in having one last go at giving him a choice –come and enjoy himself with her, or accept she goes on her own while he does his own thing. Then, she should think of herself, and have fun. Don’t make excuses for him, just say he’s not coming. Some couples make this work. It’s far better than trying to make each other be something they aren’t. PHOTOS (POSED BY MODELS): GETTY

Ask DR PHILIPPA

Woman’s GP Dr Philippa Kaye answers your questions

Curing depression with over the counter drugs Q I recently read that taking medicines like ibuprofen and aspirin help with depression. How does that work and should I take them? Philippa says A If you are suff ering with symptoms of low mood, anxiety or depression, please fi rst of all see your doctor. Ibuprofen and aspirin could interact with other medication you are taking or cause problems. The evidence for them being useful in depression is still in the research stage. Depression is not thought to be an infl ammatory disorder, but in some cases infl ammation can be seen on scans with some patients who have depression. However this is at the research stage only, please don’t self-medicate and make sure that you see your doctor fi rst.

I WANT TO CHANGE MY DIET Q I would like to eat healthily but also in a way that does not impact on pollution – can you advise?

Philippa says A A healthy, plant-based diet is not only good for you but good for the planet too! This includes wholegrains, fruit and vegetables, nuts and seeds. Red meat and processed meat is not only linked to a risk of heart disease and stroke but is thought to be bad for the planet. While high-sugar processed foods aren’t great for your diet, they don’t impact too much on the Earth. Unfortunately fi sh, which is good for you, can have a big impact on the environment. I recommend you up the fruit and veg to start!

I’m confused about my medication Q Why do the instructions for some of my medicines say take at night and others take in the morning?

Philippa says A That will be because they are thought to work better or be more useful at certain times of day. A medication that has the potential to make you sleepy, for example certain anti-depressants or pain medication, is better taken at night, as you would be asleep anyway. Particular blood pressure medication, such as ramipril, are often prescribed in the morning but the fi rst dose taken at night as it could cause dizziness. However, a recent study showed that always taking blood pressure pills at bedtime rather than in the morning could more than halve the risk of dying from a heart attack or stroke. Never change the timing of your medication without speaking to your doctor fi rst.

SOCIAL MEDIA IS MAKING THEM OBSESSED! Q My grandkids are obsessed with social media, but the pictures they send don’t look like them. They have been edited. My granddaughter now wants surgery to look the way she does in pictures. Is it safe?

Philippa says A If you are asking if plastic surgery is physically safe, then the answer is yes and no; every surgery has risks including bleeding, bruising and infection, but these risks are relatively small. However, if you are asking about whether or not changing your image to fi t an imagined ideal is safe that is diff erent! Instagram is banning face-altering fi lters, which can simulate the eff ect of plastic surgery, and your granddaughter may have been using this to edit her pictures. The company is taking this action in order to focus on the mental health of users as it gives a message that their natural appearance isn’t good enough and needs improving. If your granddaughter is suff ering with issues about her body or mental health, please encourage her to speak to a GP.

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WAYS TO BOOST YOUR HEALTH THIS WEEK The scientists have spoken! Try these easy ways to achieve a happier, healthier life

Give

hemp

tea a try Pukka Herbs Peace Tea (£2.50, Tesco) is packed with soothing ashwagandha, hemp and chamomile to help ease your stress and calm any digestive troubles. Think of it as calm in a cup.

Snack smart Feeling a bit peckish? Then why not reach for BEPPS Black Eyed Pea Puff Snacks (£1.79, Tesco)? Made from peas, they contain more protein and bre than raditional risps and

atisfy your cravings

ust as well.

Take your vitamin D It’s more eff ective than a fl u jab, according to research.* Scientists found that vitamin D helps to reduce the risk of colds and fl u – especially in those who don’t get enoug from sunlight or their diet.