Left in a coma because

When Sheridon Newcastle, opened up to her man, she never imagined it would be him she ended up running from… FALL FR ROM GRACE

THE BIG READ

Tentatively popping the wine cork, I was grateful when my boyfriend, Samuel Ford, 24, took over the pouring duties for me.

‘I’ve always been a bit clumsy and you’ve got white carpets!’ I explained with a laugh.

Samuel smiled and leaned in to give me a kiss.

‘You’re too beautiful to be clumsy,’ he told me, sitting back down on the sofa and handing me a large glass of red wine.

‘Right, where were we?’ I asked, leaning back and settling into my story.

I’d been confiding in him about my struggles with anxiety and depression, and although we’d been talking all night, there was still so much more to say.

I’d never felt able to talk to anyone so honestly before, but I loved how open and sensitive he was to my needs and I really felt that he was listening. It was what had really attracted me to Samuel after

we’d met in a club in Newcastle in August 2017.

‘He’s just seems so kind and I quite like that he’s a bit shy,’ I’d told my best mate, Steve, 26, the next day.

Things moved fast between us, and before long, Samuel was declaring his undying love for me.

We’d spend all our time together, either at my flat, or at his house.

At first, I really liked how caring he was, and felt secure with him.

But it wasn’t long before I noticed that Samuel could be quite controlling.

He was also using cocaine on occasion, which I didn’t approve of. It would make him moody and aggressive.

‘You’re not wearing that, go and change,’ he’d nstruct me if he didn’t like my outfit choice.

At first, I ried to fight my corner, but I quickly realised that t was better o just do as he said.

He had a violent

emper, too, and more often than not, it just wasn’t worth he hassle of arguing with him.

‘You never wear makeup anymore, trying a more natural look, are you?’ my friends would joke.

‘Yeah, just trying something new, girls,’ I’d laugh back. I was desperate to tell them what was going on with Samuel, but I was too scared.

He’d kill me if I ever said anything, I thought to myself whenever I felt tempted to blurt it out to anyone.

After a month or two, though, I realised that I couldn’t carry on anymore.

I was becoming increasingly isolated from my family and friends – and my anxiety and depression were being exacerbated by being around someone so volatile.

‘I really don’t think this is working,’ I said to Samuel one evening that October, after plucking up the courage to be honest with him.

I started packing up my things, but he ripped the bag out of my hands, went over to double lock the door, and then started watching TV again.

‘You’re not going anywhere without me,’ he said without even looking up.

Not knowing what to do, I tried to just get on with it and see if maybe he’d change, but things just got worse.

In October 2018, I tried to talk to him again about breaking up.

‘I told you not to speak about this, you don’t get to decide these things,’ he raged, his face turning red from shouting.

I tried to leave, but he caught up with me, grabbing and twisting my arm right back.

‘Owww,’ I cried out in sheer agony, as my arm painfully contorted.

It felt like he had broken it, but I couldn’t be sure.

Before I had time to think, Samuel had pushed me

violently to the floor. ‘Call an ambulance, I think my arm is broken,’ I begged him.

‘No, you’re fine, stop moaning,’ he replied coldly.

I lay there sobbing as he went to the bathroom for a shower, acting as if nothing had happened.

Suddenly, seeing my chance to escape, I rushed over to the bedroom balcony.

It was two floors up, but it I knew he’d broken my arm Samuel had seemed so kind

ROM GR

REAL LIFE

I was desperate to get away from him.

Just as I was lowering myself over the edge, preparing to jump to safety, I heard a noise in the room behind. It was Samuel. ‘What are you doing?’ he raged, dragging me back in and chucking me back on the floor. Eventually, after I’d begged him for hours, he rang an ambulance and I was finally treated for a broken shoulder at Newcastle Freeman Hospital.

I was forced to lie to all my friends and family – even to my mum Karen, 52 – and say that I’d fallen down the stairs.

Samuel was there with me, acting like a concerned boyfriend.

But when we were left alone, he went back to his old ways.

‘You better not tell anyone about this,’ he hissed. Despite everything he’d done, I still couldn’t escape his clutches – he just wouldn’t leave me alone and I felt like there was no way out.

‘If you ever try and escape me again, you will seriously regret it,’ he’d tell me menacingly. I was still too scared to confide in anyone, and so I couldn’t find any way of leaving the hellish life I’d now found myself in.

In mid May 2019, with my arm still healing, we went to see some of Samuel’s pals on the other side of town.

After drinking in the sun all day, we got into a big row after he told me I was a ‘slut’ for wearing shorts.I was livid and o his riend s house at around 1am and walked around alone for a bit before some kind strangers took pity on me and called the police.

‘No, it’s nothing at all, I’ve just argued with my boyfriend,’ I tried to tell them, downplaying the situation.

But the police didn’t seem to He had total control over me Upset, drunk and tired, I forgot to double lock the door before passing out on the sofa. At 6am, a huge bang woke me with a start.

Before I had a chance to work out what was happening, Samuelwas in my flat.

He’d broken in, and was hovering over me.

‘Don’t you ever run away from me again,’ he screamed, dragging me from the sofa. ‘What

Back for more

VIOLENT

had only just started to heal, break again.

It was total agony. He then threw me back down and tried to strangle me, before shoving his fingers down my throat, ripping the inside of my mouth to shreds with his nails.

I tried to scream for help, but Samuel just turned the music on his phone up on full blast to drown out my cries.

His loud gym music was

blaring loudly as I begged him over and over again to stop. ‘You’ve grassed me up to the police,

haven’t you?’ he kept shouting, his wild eyes

bulging out of his sockets.

‘Get out of my flat, just get the hell away from me,’ I told him, trying my best

to fight him off. I reached for my phone, but he took it from me and bent it clean in half.

He was like a wild animal. He started to strangle me again until I felt faint.

He’s going to kill me this time, I thought, petrified.

Thankfully, phone rang just as I was uggling for breath. He took the call outside the om, giving me time to think. glanced over at the balcony ain and thought that maybe s time I could do it. t’s just a little jump , I tried convince myself, trying to

pare my body for the fall…

REAL LIFE

A BETTER PLA

As I was about to climb over the railings, I saw my neighbour walking by, and screamed at him to call the police.

Samuel, who’d come back into the room, turned on his heels and ran.

With him gone, I managed to carefully put my sling back on over my shoulder.

Afew minutes later, the police arrived, and after giving them a statement, I was taken to hospital to have my shoulder seen to.

After that, fearing Samuel would be after me, I went to stay with my mum.

Iwas told a few days later

I tried to take my own life

that the police had caught up with him.

He was arrested while staying at his sister’s house, and he’d been charged with assault and false imprisonment.

I began to look forward to his day in court, knowing that justice would prevail.

And not long after, on a night out with pals, I met my now boyfriend, Adam Appleton, 29.

‘He’s everything that Samuel wasn’t, he’s the real deal!’ I told best mate Steve, over the moon. In June 2019, prosecutors at Newcastle

Crown Court had agreed

ccept a guilty plea from muel for controlling

d coercive behaviour – aning he could walk e from court. He was given just 200 urs of community

vice and a three-year straining order.

Didn’t they believe e?’ I cried to Adam hen I found out. Iwas so angry. The weight of verything was finally atching up with me and

SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR

I sank into a deep depression. Iwas petrified to leave the house in case I saw Samuel.

My anxiety was off the scale, and one morning after Adam had left for work, I decided to take an overdose, swallowing a cocktail of tablets.

Itext Adam to say goodbye and to tell him I loved him. After that, I passed out. Thankfully, Adam called an ambulance and alerted my mum, and I was rescued just in time. My heart stopped beating a few times in the ambulance and I was in a coma for over five days in Newcastle Victoria Infirmary. Waking up, Adam was sat next to me, tears in his eyes.

Looking around, there were cards and teddies from loved ones in my room, and when I read them, I burst into tears. ‘I’ll never do it again,’ I promised Adam.

Luckily, I’ve had no longterm issues, and I’m feeling a lot better now.

Ihave my down days, and I worry about bumping into Samuelin the future.

Istill suffer with anxiety and sometimes have panic attacks, but I’m getting better at coping with them – especially with the help of Adam.

I’ve got too much to live for, and I’m not going to let

Samuel ruin my life. I’m just glad I finally got away from him when I did.

Iattend regular counselling sessions, and I’m hoping to do a counselling course in the future so that I can help others. Iwouldn’t want anyone to go through what I have.

It just goes to show, no matter how bleak, there is always help out there if you look hard enough.  Are you experiencing domestic abuse? Call the Refuge 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247. I suffer with panic attacks

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