Church Leadership 75 by CPAS

Summer 2011 | CL75

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Special focus: Growing in Christlikeness

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Growing like him

3 Growing in Christlikeness James Lawrence Leadership | Character | Calling

This issue is all about growing in Christlikeness. We hope you’ll find inspiration and practical resources for your spiritual journey from our band of distinguished contributors. Mind you, in my experience, Jesus often provides teaching on this topic in the most unexpected ways.

Preparing for a job interview some years ago, I decided to brighten up my image with a new tie: flowery, colourful, eye-catching. The dark suit and plain shirt would say ‘responsible, mature, reliable’. But the tie would complement that impression with ‘creative, original, daring’. For all the good this ploy did me, I might as well have turned up for interview in my pyjamas. After my feeble performance in front of the panel, I mooched head down and defeated into the nearby city centre in search of tea, cake and solace. A young woman, in the shabby trappings of a street person, approached me. ‘Spare a few pence, guv?’ I blanked her, lowered my chin and plodded on. Hearing her draw breath, I quickened my pace, certain of the inevitable low-level insult that was coming my way. But in her small, hoarse voice, she said: ‘Groovy tie...’ Yes, I turned back – and slipped a pound coin into her hand. But I reckon she gave more. And she gave first.

20 Christ the King Rachel Rosborough All-age worship | Christ the king | Advent

22 A time to mourn Marie Calvert All Souls | Bereavement | Remembrance 24 The leadership moment Chris Blakeley and Sue Howard Spiitual life | Leadership | Resources

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Leadership | Character | Calling

growing in christlikeness

Approaching the end of his series exploring the CPAS leadership ‘doughnut’ model, James Lawrence wonders if he has made a mistake. fa i t

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ver the last six issues of Church Leadership we’ve introduced a six-segment model of Christian leadership that we describe as ‘the doughnut’ – please note, jam-filled not ring! And now we come to the centre of the doughnut: ‘growing in Christlikeness’. The mistake? Well, I think we should have started here. Growing in Christlikeness is at the heart of Christian discipleship, and therefore the priority for every Christian leader. It influences everything we do. So what does such growth look like and how do we give attention to it?

Christlikeness

James Lawrence

In what sense are we to be Christlike? It is essential we are clear on this. There is a difference between being like Christ and being Christ. Jesus is a model for us in a limited and specific way. So when Paul writes ‘imitate me as I imitate Christ’ (1 Corinthians 11:1) he doesn’t mean try to be Jesus. Indeed, one of the common problems for leaders is the

‘Messiah complex’, where leaders start to act as if they are Christ, feeling compelled to rescue everyone and every situation. Paul is encouraging us to be like Jesus. How? I think the Scriptures would encourage us to be like Christ in some of the following ways.

Like Christ in our character Character and personality are different. Personality is about preferences and is value-free. Each of us has preferences for doing things in certain ways, and it isn’t that one is better than the other, just different. Character is about qualities that are value-laden. You can be of good character or of bad character. Christian leaders are called to be like Christ in character, to exercise integrity. Someone has defined it as ‘we are who we are, no matter where we are or who we’re with’. There is a consistency that builds trust. Our habits are in tune with our values, deeds are consistent with words, and expressions are in harmony with feelings. Integrity is expressed in a variety of ways: CL75 ©CPAS

The list could continue! These are just some of the qualities which the Holy Spirit should be growing in Christian leaders (as well as in those they lead). How are things going for you?

Like Christ in our ambition

All leaders get hurt. It goes with the job. Forgiveness is the antidote to bitterness that all too easily seeps into the lifeblood of leaders...

Truthfulness ‘Let your yes be yes and your no to be no’ (Matthew 5:37). In a world where spin is commonplace and where the credibility of leaders is low, truthfulness in all circumstances is a rare virtue. Yet Christian leaders should be marked by our willingness to speak the truth, to avoid exaggeration, ‘white lies’, flattery, weasel words, halftruths and gossip. Tell it like it is! Faithfulness ‘Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful’ (1 Corinthians 4:2). Linked with perseverance, this quality is what I look for in potential leaders. Have they been faithful with what they already have been assigned, faithful in the small things? And, for those of us who have been leaders for a while, are we still faithful in using the gifts and skills we have to the very best of our ability, or have we started to ‘coast’, to rely on past performance and reputation? Compassion Jesus’ life was characterised by compassion. His heart went out to the grieving widow (Luke 7:11-17), he wept for the death of a friend (John 11:35) and he saw that the people were like sheep without a shepherd (Mark 6:34). When leaders simply ‘go through the motions’, they no longer connect with people. We need to suffer with people and allow our lives to be affected by those we lead. Forgiveness In my experience, lack of forgiveness is surprisingly common among leaders, often for understandable reasons. All leaders get hurt. It goes with the job. Forgiveness is the antidote to bitterness that all too easily seeps into the lifeblood of leaders, and eventually leads to that most toxic symptom and least attractive quality in any leader – cynicism. Gentleness It takes great strength of character to be gentle (1Timothy 3:3). Such a quality will be expressed differently according to some of our personality traits, but a gentle leader treats people with respect, courtesy and love. Love Obvious, perhaps, but worth saying, that to grow in Christ is to grow in love.

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The Bible is very clear. There are two sorts of ambition: selfish ambition and godly ambition. Until a few years ago, I rather naively didn’t see myself as an ambitious person. I wasn’t interested in ‘promotion’ or into the political side of things. Behind this was the idea that somehow ambition was wrong, ungodly. A friend graciously challenged me and helped me to see just how ambitious I was, pointing out that, without ambition, very little gets done. The real question for me was: ‘Will your ambition be used for selfish or godly ends?’ Leaders are often ‘ambitious’ people. Given free rein, this ambition will always pander to the selfishness inherent in our fallen nature. We will use whatever gifts we have for our own ends, abuse position and power to meet our own needs. The study of leaders throughout history bears testimony to the awful results of unbridled ambition. But Jesus says ‘not so with you’. We are to be ambitious for godly things, to seek first his kingdom, to do ‘nothing from selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others’ (Philippians 2:3-4). Such ambition motivates a leader to do great things for God, to use all that God has given for his purposes, to make a difference.

Like Christ in our service Jesus sets the example for us as he wraps a towel around his waist and washes his disciples’ feet (John 13:1-20). The nature of ‘servant leadership’ is that we choose to serve other people. But the people we serve are not our master. Jesus is. That means the first priority of the servant leader is to serve Christ, not people. As a result, sometimes Christian leaders will say no to what people want, or will challenge people about their attitude or lifestyle. Servant leadership is not about doing whatever others want. It is about serving God and through our service of God, serving people. And a lot of this will be a willingness to be involved in the messiness of people’s lives and to do the mundane and ordinary. We are not to ‘lord it’ over others as the Gentiles and rulers of

James Lawrence is director of the CPAS development team. He also directs the CPAS Arrow Leadership Programme. James is the author of the Growing Leaders paperback and co-author of the Growing Leaders course.

Jesus’ day did (Matthew 20:25-26), but to be a servant. Unlike the worldly leadership journey where the more senior you become the more you can take ‘advantage’ of privilege and prestige that comes with the role, the Christian leadership journey is a downward one, growing ever more in the humility and servant-heartedness that means we follow the example of Jesus. I remember hearing a speaker saying how nervous she was when about to lead a day on the Arrow Leadership Programme, concerned whether she would be accepted and whether she would be able to deliver what was needed. She chatted with her husband the night before. His response was loving but tough: ‘You have a choice. You can either be focused on yourself and serving your own needs, or you can focus on God and serve his purposes. Which are you going to do?’ She knew the answer.

Growing We grow in these things by being ‘intentional’ in our development. Often we don’t have to work at opportunities to grow in these qualities. Everyday life provides us with plenty of experiences to develop in these areas. It is how we respond to these experiences that will govern whether we grow in the appropriate qualities or not. When we are asked to do a menial task, when we are passed over for promotion through a misunderstanding, when we are hurt by a follower gossiping about a confidence we shared with them, when we are weary of doing the same thing for the umpteenth time, when we have the opportunity to portray ourselves in a better light than is actually accurate, when we can avoid taking the blame for something we did do, when... well the list goes on. How do we respond?

Markers As I’ve mentioned before in this series, there are several things that mark out the wise leader in his or her growth. Such people will: Maintain time for personal devotions, reading the Bible so they are shaped by God’s word, depending on God in prayer, cultivating worship of Father, Son and Holy Spirit, seeking to be open to God and malleable clay in his hands. Develop spiritual disciplines, maintaining the ones that are already part of their life and growing in those that are as yet not part of their life. (Check Bishop Stephen Cottrell’s thoughtful suggestions on page 6). Invite ongoing, helpful feedback. Not the negative criticism designed to cut down, nor the flattering praise designed to puff up, but the thoughtful and truthful feedback that helps a leader gain genuine self-awareness. Prioritise empowering relationships (both formal and informal) that mean they travel the journey with others, and not on their own. See Keith Mobberley on spiritual direction (page 8) and Ellie Clack on the benefit of a ‘formation group’ (page 11).

Centrality The ‘jam’ at the heart of the leadership doughnut is growing in Christlikeness, the first priority of every Christian leader. I doubt many of us would disagree with this. But do our lives reflect this truth? It is so easy for everything else to take over, for what we are doing for God to take over from being with God, for success to seduce us into believing we are better than we actually are, or for failure to convince us that we are worse than we are. Leaders need to live this priority, and most of us need others around us to help us to do so.

The question that should preoccupy us is not how successful are we as leaders, but am I more like Christ this year than last?

If we want to make a difference we need to be different. The question that should preoccupy us is not how successful are we as leaders, but am I more like Christ this year than last?

Resource Don’t forget you can download the text of this article (and all CL articles) to use as a briefing paper or discussion resource. Intentionality Check the CPAS leadership podcasts for stimulating material on this topic from Bishops Harold Miller and Ken Clarke and Dr Jason Curtis of Rutherford House, Edinburgh.

Bestseller Nine years on from publication James’s paperback Growing Leaders, remains a top-seller for its co-publishers (CPAS and Bible Reading Fellowship). Check the website to download an extract.

CL75 ©CPAS

Christlikeness | Prayer | Leadership Stephen Cottrell

less can be more Stephen Cottrell offers some typically counter-intuitive insights on resources for the spiritual life.

ishop Stephen, you’re famously on record for suggesting that ‘doing nothing’ can make a difference to our lives... Yes, by ‘doing nothing I don’t mean idleness – though a little bit of idleness from time to time is no bad thing. I understand prayer first of all as being about what God says to us, not about what we say to God. Samuel says: ‘Speak, Lord, your servant is listening’, but we normally say: ‘Listen, Lord, your servant is speaking!’ So around the phrase ‘doing nothing’ I’m encouraging myself and the church to think about taking a more contemplative attitude to prayer, where the first thing we do is actually come into a place of communion with God, where we can receive and have our lives shaped by him and by his priorities for our lives. It’s about being put back in touch with a bigger vision of what God wants. It is

CL75 ©Stephen Cottrell

about God changing our minds, shaping our wills – and for that there needs to be a little bit of shutting up, an open receptivity and a kind of emptying of ourselves, in order to be filled by God – and provocatively I’ve used the phrase ‘doing nothing’ to describe the well that God can fill, and which overflows in creativity in our lives. I hope that the connection with leadership is obvious. If leaders are frantic, driven people, full of their own bright ideas and never stopping to take the temperature, or check God’s agenda, or looking for God’s vision, then clearly we shall end up modelling (or creating) the church in our own image as just another human organisation – and it’s not! It is the company of Christ, his body, his church. So this way of praying – and being – seems vital for the Christian community, and therefore for Christian leaders.

Stephen Cottrell is Bishop of Chelmsford, having previously served six years as Area Bishop for Reading in the Diocese of Oxford. He is a founding member of the Church of England’s College of Evangelists and a popular writer on spirituality and evangelism.

You chose Hitting the Ground Kneeling as the title of your book on leadership: how does that work out in the day-to-day life of a leader? In that slightly irritating way of his, St Paul says ‘pray all the time’ (1 Thessalonians 5:17). I don’t think he means ‘do that activity we call prayer all the time’. I think he means ‘make your life a prayer’ – arrive at that point where you are so inhabited by the Spirit that your life is translucent of the gospel. We glimpse that in the lives of the great saints, but for most of us that’s not where we’re at – so we need times of prayer in order to become people of prayer, and those times and disciplines will differ according to our circumstances and personalities – there’s not a right way. I’m sceptical of off-the-shelf solutions. One of my other provocative sayings is: ‘You really ought to re-invent the wheel, because then it will be your wheel’. So, hitting the ground kneeling at a practical level means giving time and priority to the disciplines of the spiritual life, whatever that means for you. For me, it means trying to have a daily rhythm of prayer, and it certainly also means a regular quiet day away from everything – and I don’t call it a day of prayer, but I do some praying. I also do a lot of sleeping – but I see it as a day to reconnect with the big vision, the big picture, almost a day to be re-evangelised by the vision. The danger in a busy, driven life is that you can get weighed down by the immediate, and lose sight of the important. Are there any particular resources that you have found useful in your rhythm of prayer and contemplation? They might seem obvious: the scriptures and the sacraments. These are the things that the church has been given, the resources for the Christian life. So reading the scriptures, and brooding upon them

is absolutely central to me. I find as the years go by I love the scriptures The danger in a busy, driven more and more, and find new life is that you can get weighed things in them. But also, for me, down by the immediate, and the sacraments, particularly the Eucharist, which is absolutely central lose sight of the important. to my Christian life. When we gather around the Lord’s table, we are placing God at the centre, placing ourselves in right relationship to him, which is one of And, finally, a piece of advice that has receptivity. We come empty-handed and he helped you on your journey? feeds us. I can think of nothing better to The late Derek Allen, one-time principal suggest, the things Jesus gave us himself. of St Stephen’s House in Oxford, led my Why would we look for anything else? ordination retreat. In his final address The journey of growing in Christlikeness he said: ‘Find enough time to sleep, find must be a lonely trek..? enough time to pray – and then do what you can.’ I wrote the words down, chiefly I think it’s never that way, though it often because at the time they struck me as feels that way. To return to the subject of prayer, I don’t believe there’s any such thing being absurd. Now I see their wisdom. I think he meant ‘find time for God and time as ‘private’ prayer. Many people have such for yourself’, which must also include (in difficulty with it, because they are trying my case) time for being a husband and a to do something that doesn’t exist. There’s father, time for being the person God made personal prayer, intimate prayer, but it can me to be. And yet in ministry, the first thing never be ‘private’ – first, because we believe to go is usually time for family, then time in a God who is community: Father, Son for God. And I don’t believe for a moment and Spirit. We believe that the invitation that God is asking us to sacrifice our family, of the Christian life is to participate in the or the things that make us who we are. community of God, which Jesus has made possible through his dying and rising. We Get those two priorities right (your time believe anyway that prayer is not ‘my’ for God and for who you are) and then the prayer, it is the prayer of the Son to the ‘do what you can’ is massive and fruitful Father in the power of the Spirit, and I’m because it’s flowing from a life that is really just kind of joining in – and there’s all the aligned with God. saints and angels giving it some welly, the prayer of the church in heaven, and then there is that great solidarity of Christian men and women across the globe, who are praying at the same time as me, even if they are not in the same room as me – so I am not on my own, when I am living my Christian life. I’m surrounded by this great cloud of witnesses. So yes, it can feel lonely, but I find huge strength and solace by realising that it is not ‘my’ prayer, it is not ‘my’ faith. It is always ‘ours’.

Podcast To listen to the podcast interview on which this article is based, visit www.cpas.org.uk and check the podcast button. Read Bishop Stephen offers practical guidance for deepening our spiritual lives in his short book Come and See (BRF). Check www.brf.org.uk for full details. You can also download an extract.

Kneel Bishop Stephen’s popular books including Hit the Ground Kneeling (Church House Publishing) are available from your local Christian bookshop or from Church House Publishing at www.chpublishing.co.uk

CL75 ©Stephen Cottrell

Spiritual direction | Leadership | Spiritual disciplines Keith Mobberley and Greg Smith Isn’t having a spiritual director a bit like hiring an accountant – something for people in a ‘higher league’? With years of experience in spiritual direction, Keith Mobberley is keen to demystify this area, asserting that journeying with a ‘soul friend’ is of huge benefit for all.

keeping company

CL75 ©Keith Mobberley

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piritual direction’, ‘spiritual accompaniment’ – or something else? How do you describe what you are offering? I work with what people are comfortable with! Some like ‘spiritual director’, others would talk about a ‘soul friend’ – and some would prefer to say it’s just a special kind of Christian friendship. How is what you are offering different from a mentoring relationship? Mentoring has an important role in terms of developing leadership. We use the Growing Leaders course in my parishes: and the mentoring relationship is a key part of that in terms of support and challenge for developing yourself both as a disciple and in particular aspects of leadership. But what I’m fundamentally concerned about is the person’s spiritual health and vitality. What are the benefits for someone with a leadership role? Jesus’s passion for all of us is for us to give him our best. Spiritual direction helps someone to invest their time and energy in their inner health in terms of their vital relationship with Jesus – and they do this by choosing someone to accompany them, to help fulfil their potential , to be the best they can as a disciple of Jesus. The Christian journey is a dangerous journey alone. We need support, encouragement and guidance; and to have someone who is mature in the Spirit alongside us is a vital resource for our health and development as Christians disciples and as leaders. How might a typical meeting go? We usually start with conversation about light things and then I’d ask ‘What do you want to talk about today?’ Then we would spend roughly an hour navigating different aspects of their whole life. I think of spiritual direction as fundamentally about integrating the whole of our life: family, work, relationships, finances, everything into that sense of wholeness in Christ. So conversation could touch on anything. This is what is so liberating about spiritual direction: a person is listened to, not judged, given space to reflect on their own journey. That, above all else, is the key. I’m not interrogating! I am simply helping them reflect on the whole of their life. We’ll meet probably every six or eight weeks. It gives a sense of rhythm and structure to their life in God. Prayer is an important part of our sessions and my approach varies according to the person’s Christian tradition. If someone is from the Charismatic tradition, then prayer in the Spirit and laying-on of hands

may seem natural. With someone from a more liturgical background, I’d possibly use a more formal, set form of prayer, drawing on our rich tradition of written prayer. And with someone who is from the contemplative tradition, we might have five minutes quiet, just to be, to reflect on what has been significant in the way God has spoken to them through the conversation, and to end perhaps with a Celtic blessing. Two big words in our culture are’ busy’ and ‘successful’. I think the language of spiritual direction is about space, stillness and helping someone surrender more and more to the love and the mercy and grace of Christ.

Each one of us needs a Paul in our lives, someone who can stretch us to what God wants us to be. We need a Barnabas in our lives, alongside us who can liberate us, to love life and love God. And we need a Timothy in our lives, someone whose Godgiven potential we can recognise and, in our turn, invest in them to help them to become who God wants them to be.

All kinds of people come here. They are weary from work and worry. One of the fundamental things offered is encouragement, simply to keep going, to remain ‘in’ God.

How do you ensure that expectations on both sides are appropriate? We all have agendas and questions. The first meeting would be all about sharing those together. I talk about what I believe it’s all about and I listen to them as to what they are looking for. The key thing is that the relationship is a secure place. The test question could be: is this relationship a place where I feel myself, free and safe? If you’re having to edit stuff, if you’re having to repeat yourself because the person isn’t hearing you very well, you need to say let’s review this. How do you prepare when someone is coming to see you? I have a daily spiritual discipline of an hour in stillness and contemplation, an hour under the word of God, an hour in spiritual reading. The attentiveness that comes out of that space is what I offer.

How do you begin finding a spiritual director? Whether or not you’re an Anglican, I’d suggest starting with an inquiry to your diocesan retreat house. The warden should have a list of people that are available to offer this ministry. And check out the resources offered by the Retreat Association (details on page 10). And, finally, what about the importance of your relationship with your own spiritual director? I revere people who have lived the Christian life, long-term. My spiritual director is in his seventies. He connects with who I am at a deep level. He is a person of prayer, integrity and wisdom – and cares about me and loves me, so I thank God for him. The Rev Keith Mobberley is vicar of Hatton in rural Warwickshire.

How do you see spiritual direction making a ‘practical’ difference? All kinds of people come here. They are weary from work and worry. One of the fundamental things offered is encouragement, simply to keep going, to remain ‘in’ God. So that’s the first thing. The other key word is ‘discernment’: in a sense it’s ‘reading the music behind the words’. In the Spirit of God you may recognise a significance in something that’s said and then may speak into that. As a result the person may be enlivened to an aspect of what God might be doing in them, or challenging them to do, or even to let go of even. This can be part of helping them fulfil their potential to be known by God, to be loved by him and to fulfil his mandate to go out and make disciples.

CL75 ©Keith Mobberley

from the other side... The Rev Greg Smith is vicar of St Andrew’s, Eastern Green, a suburban parish on the western edge of Coventry. St Andrew’s, a congregation of about 100, supports a church plant of approximately 35 people. Greg has regular meetings with Keith Mobberley, his spiritual director. Greg, how did you get into spiritual direction? In my early days as a curate, I found I was struggling and wanted someone outside my then parish to talk to and pray with, to help me lift my eyes from the immediate difficulties and to focus on what God was doing in my situation. Sadly, my first spiritual director died. I then sought advice from the diocese as to who might be an appropriate replacement and was put in touch with Keith.

I am enabled to recognise more clearly what God is doing in my life and through my ministry....

What are the key benefits as far as you are concerned? I am enabled to recognise more clearly what God is doing in my life and through my ministry; to bring into the open the challenges I might only have half acknowledged previously; it helps me check my ‘spiritual temperature’. And what about the particular benefits linked to your life as a leader? I am enabled to identify what my priorities have been and what they should be. I am challenged to identify the strategic questions, to see the bigger picture, to recognize where my gifts are being used and what opportunities I might be missing.

In part, it is about how I feel afterwards: encouraged, reinvigorated, inspired. Very often, I will have identified a particular course of action to advance an aspect of ministry or to address a difficulty I face.

How often do you meet Keith, and what would be the pattern of a typical meeting?

How does this relationship differ from, say, a mentoring or coaching relationship?

We meet every two to three months at his home. The agenda is mine to talk about whatever is most beneficial to me and my ministry. Keith gently probes, asking questions of clarification and challenge. He reminds me of my gifts and of what God has done previously. He is a tremendous encourager. He focuses me on the leadership/strategic questions. I bring the meeting to a close when I feel it is right to do so and we pray for each other.

There is continually the recognition between us both that what we are talking about is not me and my work/ ministry, but what God is doing in and through me.

Podcast Check the CPAS website to hear Keith’s infectious enthusiasm for spiritual direction in the podcast interview on which part of this article is based. Retreat Association Check www.retreats.org.uk for much more than information on retreats. This excellent website features a particularly helpful section on spiritual direction. SPIDR This is an informal ecumenical Christian network promoting spiritual direction in and around the London and South East England: www.spidr.org.uk. 10 CL75 ©Greg Smith

How can you tell if a meeting has gone well?

What would you say to a friend who was considering spiritual direction? It is an enormously valuable thing. Direction is not just for those who are lost, but recognises that all human beings veer off course and will inevitably end up a long way from where God intends them if they do not re-orientate from time to time. Getting the right spiritual director is also important.

Spiritual Direction: A practical introduction Canterbury Press, £17.99 Sue Pickering’s exploration of this area of ministry gets five stars from Amazon’s online reviewers.

Formation groups | Leadership | Character More and more people are rediscovering the truth that ‘growing in Christ’ is not a solo activity. Ellie Clack describes how membership of a ‘formation group’ has made a massively positive contribution to her growth as a person, as a disciple and as an ordained leader.

Ellie, a little bit about your background please… After graduation I worked for two very different churches (in Southampton, and then in Surrey) as a youth and parish assistant. During this time I began the process towards selection for ordination. I did my three-year training at St John’s Nottingham, followed by a curacy in Warwickshire. You’re part of a ‘formation cell group’ – what is it and how did it start? At St John’s we were all part of fellowship groups (now known as formation groups) that gathered people from different year groups, with a tutor, to meet regularly for prayer and fellowship. I was also part of a prayer triplet. It was a blend of these two ideas that led to the formation of a clergy cell group. We are five women who trained at St John’s at the same time and are now in ministry roles in different dioceses and contexts around this country. We are first and foremost friends, who love spending time together – a good place to start! We are also people who have shared the significant training and formation processes that happen in theological college and who have sought to continue sharing and supporting one another. We seek to help one another to grow, flourish, enjoy life and develop as people, as disciples and (in our context) as ordained priests too. We’re aged between 30 and 45, some are still curates, others have moved on to the next post. Some are single, some are married, some have children. And, naturally, we are all beautiful, intelligent, funny...

The Rev Ellie Clack is curate of St Mark’s, Leamington Spa. She’s married to Jeremy.

formed for action seems to be affirming, helpful, releasing – but can also be tiring and sometimes emotional for both speaker and listeners. We have plenty of coffee (and fresh-air) breaks! In between meetings we’re in regular contact on email/phone and when possible we may also meet up for special (or not-so-special) occasions and visits. What are the advantages as far as you are concerned? All of us have benefited enormously from the friendship and the chance to be completely, unashamedly ourselves with one another. There is a degree of honesty, trust, openness, and authenticity that makes this group extremely life-enhancing and healthgiving. In terms of growing in leadership, this group is the place that we tend to bring our vulnerabilities as well as our joys. We also seek to listen to God for one another and this has been significant for us as we grow in the roles we are in, and consider possibilities for the future. Inevitably we also share resources and ideas – very useful. Between us we have journeyed through frustrations, illness, disappointment, leaving jobs, starting new ones. We have also shared in some delightful times too: growth, new challenges, healing and many more. I can’t imagine not being part of this group. I want to grow old with them!

How would you advise anyone who’s thinking of starting a formation group? Pray and consider carefully who would be part of it. Despite shared experiences we are all very different in our group, and it works very well. We have a deep level of love and respect for one another, including celebrating our differences. Establish the standards that you all want to aim for. We decided at the beginning how often we wanted to meet, where, what the format of that time would be, the lines of confidentiality, and some of our expectations. This has been really helpful in subsequent meetings – and although we bend and flex to include new things, to accommodate different circumstances, those standards essentially remain. Commit to it! As and when you get the group going, invest in it, commit to it and decide on an appropriate review point (perhaps after a couple of meetings). Let people go if it is not working for them. There would be nothing worse than having someone ‘trapped’ in a group that was not helping them form as a person or as a disciple of Christ. The group works best when everyone invests well into it. It also means we can help to ‘carry’ one another in the hard times. So if you are sticking with it, then get stuck in!

How ‘structured’ is the group? We meet twice a year in places away from our normal everyday life. We’re away for two nights, following a pattern that allows us to blend socialising, catching up, eating and laughing together, with some quality, focused time for each member to share how life and ministry is going: the highs and lows. Each person gets a good chunk of time to talk and share (at least an hour), and then the rest of us gather around them to encourage, to pray, to listen to God and share any collective wisdom. This pattern CL75 ©Ellie Clack

Resources | Prayer | Discipleship James Lawrence

image conscious To become more like Jesus is a yearning common to every Christian – and it’s the motivation for innumerable books from every tradition. James Lawrence and colleagues offer personal recommendations.

TIA

S SE N Virtue Reborn, LE Tom Wright, SPCK This is a challenging and, perhaps, uncomfortable read because the author’s focus is on personal transformation. The central thesis is that virtue, specifically Christian virtue, is what helps form Christian character. It is not a ‘natural state’ but something that comes about through a combination of the Spirit’s work in our lives and our appropriating God’s grace through the disciplines that lead it to become ‘second nature’. Written with Wright’s characteristic clarity and insight, this is a ‘must read’ for those wanting to explore growing in Christlikeness in depth.

For further reading

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Practise Resurrection, Eugene Peterson, Hodder For those who know Peterson’s books, this latest title will not disappoint. For those who don’t, here is a great way to start with one of the most helpful authors on Christian living. Peterson focuses on the themes of maturity, growing up and steadiness. He characterises our age as addicted to novelty, individualism and speed. In contrast, he argues that the biblical process of maturing is ancient, community-based and slow – not particularly in sync with life in 2011. But this is the Christian path. Each chapter is based on a section of the Letter to the Ephesians and combines detailed textual analysis, personal insight, life stories and references to writers from across Christian history. This so much richer than many of the self-help, ‘x steps to change’ books that are around. But be warned, ‘practising resurrection’ is a lifelong process.

Spiritual Fitness, Graham Tomlin, Continuum Tomlin uses the gym as a metaphor for how we might get spiritually fit, where health is to be measured not by head knowledge but by the cultivation of Christian virtues. He suggests ‘to be spiritually fit is to be like Jesus. It means to become more fully human. It means to become like God.’ Throughout Tomlin draws on the Scriptures, early church history, contemporary films and his 12

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expertise in Reformation theology. All this is done with a delightful lightness of touch and passion for God’s Church to be all that it is called to be.

And there’s more Growing Leaders, James Lawrence, CPAS/BRF Chapters 6 and 7 explore the theme of this issue of Church Leadership, offering further insights into how character changes and some practical suggestions for ways to grow in Christlikeness. Who You Are When No One is Looking, Bill Hybels, Kingsway With the strapline ‘choosing consistency’, Hybels offers his typical pithy insights into issues of character development. Integrity,

Jonathan Lamb, IVP Basing his text on 2 Corinthians, Lamb examines key passages and interweaves them with examples from everyday life as he searches out what it means to exercise integrity: leading with God watching. The Life You’ve Always Wanted, John Ortberg, Zondervan This could be described as a ‘lite’ version of Dallas Willard’s book The Spirit of the Disciplines. Whilst easier to read than Willard, it is no less profound as it explores spiritual disciplines for everyday life.

James Lawrence is a member of the CPAS team of leadership development advisers. Our advisers are available to help as external facilitators for a variety of church leadership and development projects. Check the CPAS website or call Carol Kennedy on 01926 458454.

Further recommendations Cave Refectory Road, Ian Adams, SPCK Regular Church Leadership contributor Ian Adams explores the basic rhythm that encapsulates the wisdom of the monastic tradition – a movement between the solitude of personal prayer (with all its challenges); living out the experience of prayer in spiritual community; and going out into an unpredictable world to meet God. Within this context, the author then goes on to explore how practices such as simplicity, devotion, humility and rootedness may be lived out in twenty-first century western society. Under the Unpredictable Plant, Eugene Peterson, Eerdmans This is a set of reflections on leadership, discipleship and spirituality linked to the book of Jonah (which is where the odd title comes from). The opening section had me hooked: Peterson discusses how being a Christian leader seemed to be eroding the landscape of his soul. He offers deep and relevant thoughts on ministry and leadership

and how these can get in the way of being a disciple and a human being. There are probing questions about how often we swap our true vocations for a ‘career in religion’. And plenty of humour too. Highly recommended. Seeking God, Esther de Waal, Canterbury Press A brief and thoughtful introduction to the Rule of St Benedict and how a way of life designed for sixth-century monks and nuns can be surprisingly relevant for Christians of today in a very different context. Wise, deep and humane. I found it hugely encouraging and thought-provoking. This is a good first place to start seeing if the Benedictine way might be a refreshing well from which to drink. The Inner Life of a Christian Leader, Chris Blakely, Sue Howard, Grove/CPAS Brand-new from the CPAS/Grove leadership series, this booklet draws from a variety of Christian traditions to explore what it is that sustains the leader in his or her leadership. (See interview on page 24.)

Re-Jesus www.rejesus.co.uk This pioneering website is not just for ‘interested outsiders’. It has excellent and freshly original resources for daily prayer. Pray as you go www.pray-as-you-go.org provdes daily MP3 downloads, drawn from the contemplative tradition.

Barefoot Disciple – Walking the way of passionate humility, Stephen Cherry, Continuum This book has a great deal to teach about the achievement of real fulfilment in all aspects of modern-day life by learning to understand the need for, and meaning of, true humility. The author’s energetic, engaging and compassionate style makes the book’s message both compelling and accessible. This was the Archbishop of Canterbury’s Lent book for 2011. Follow: a simple and profound call to live like Jesus, Floyd McClung, David C Cook This is a real-life guide to discipleship the ‘Jesus way’. The author describes how he exchanged a life of ‘religion’ for a life of relationship with Jesus, a relationship that led him to form communities of outwardlooking Christian disciples around the world.

Wordlive www.scriptureunion.org.uk/wordlive Varied and vibrant, this site offers rich resource for prayer and scripture-engagement. Apps of the apostles You’ve found a website or an application that’s making a positive difference to your discipleship? Great! Please tell us about it – and send a link – cl@cpas.org.uk CL75 ©CPAS

Reflection | Bible | Transformation Brian Draper An extraordinary statement from St Paul fills us with hope – yet it is also a huge challenge. Brian Draper invites us to ponder the deep, transformative mystery at the heart of our faith.

And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:18 (TNIV)

oasis: burden of glory

aul’s focus here seems less about the future (where so often we park our hope, just out of reach), and more about the present. We are being transformed, now. Aren’t we? Three words from this passage call to me in particular: ‘transformed’, ‘image’ and ‘glory’. So let’s take each in turn.

The idea of transformation is surely one of the most crucial in the Bible. We do not have to stay like this forever, individually or collectively. There is hope.

Transformed The idea of transformation is surely one of the most crucial in the Bible. We do not have to stay like this forever, individually or collectively. There is hope.

I remember chatting to a friend over coffee. He had tried so hard to change his ways, but still he couldn’t seem to break the old habits which were hurting him and his family. ‘I give up,’ he said. ‘I will never change.’ It was a bleak admission. But how many of us feel like that from time to time?

Podcast Go to the Church Leadership website to listen to a podcast interview with Brian. Blogs Brian blogs and promotes spiritual intelligence at www.spiritualintelligence.co.uk Thoughts You can listen to Brian’s Thought for the Day broadcasts via the BBC Religion and Ethics web pages. Extract Check the Church Leadership website for an extract from Brian’s Spiritual Intelligence. 14

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Thankfully, there’s a subtle difference between change and transformation. Change takes huge will-power, and frequently doesn’t last. We can change our appearance, our car, our job, even our behaviour – yet, our hearts can remain untouched. And if they do, soon enough we will revert to type.

Transformation implies a less ‘forced’ process, one that is deeper and is irreversible. The caterpillar becomes the butterfly – and there is no going back. It remains the same being, yet it is truly, beautifully, other – transformed into the very thing it was created to be. The caterpillar didn’t take an off-theshelf course in self-actualisation. There’s no self-help quick-fix on offer here, especially when it comes to us being transformed into the image of Jesus. Real transformation inevitably involves a letting go: a form of darkness to accompany the metamorphosis, a dying. To be transformed, we must inevitably relinquish much of who we have come to believe our self to be.

Image So who do we believe ourself to be? And have we, in truth, ever met (or even glimpsed) the person we were created to become? That may sound like a mystical, even playful, question. But let’s be serious here: if we truly believe that ‘I no longer live, but Christ lives in me’ (Galatians 2:19), and if we really are a ‘new creation’, and if ‘the old has gone, and the new has come’ (2 Corinthians 5.17) – then, who should we expect to see when we look in the mirror? Try it. Go on. Stare at yourself for long enough to become disconnected,

Brian Draper is a writer, thinker and speaker who runs his own ‘spiritual intelligence’ consultancy called Echosounder. He’s the author of Searching 4 Faith and Spiritual Intelligence (Lion Hudson). Brian presents BBC Radio 4’s Thought for the Day on the Today programme.

For previous Oasis texts go to www.church-leadership.org.

The caterpillar becomes the butterfly – and there is no going back. It remains the same being, yet it is truly, beautifully, other – transformed into the very thing it was created to be.

unfamiliar with the image before you. Then ask yourself: ‘Who is this, staring back at me through my own reflection?’ How do you see yourself? Can you see something of Christ in those eyes? Of course, this is deep stuff. We’re pondering profound issues of identity, so it’s little wonder we often prefer not to ‘go there’. It’s also easy to get confused. We tend, as Christians, to believe that our goal is to be transformed into the image of the church. Thankfully, however, Jesus did not. He was not the firstborn of all identikit Christians, but ‘of all creation’ (Colossians 1:15), in all its wildness and diversity. Our calling is not to be flattened out like pastry before the church cookie-cutter: we don’t all have to become nice, one-dimensional gingerbread folk who sing mid-tempo worship songs set to inspiring PowerPoint slides of waterfalls. Instead – and herein lies the mystery – somehow we are able to become more fully, more truly our selves, even as we become more like someone else: Jesus.

How does that work? God only knows. But perhaps we must start by dying, first, to the stereotypical images that shape us into something we’re not – whether those images are stereotypically ‘worldy’ or stereotypically ‘Christian’.

most of us, who prefer to think of ourselves as miserable sinners who will never change. We believe that the Great Story, in which we play a crucial part (whether we like it or not), really begins in Genesis 3 with the Fall, instead of Genesis 1, with Creation.

Glory

But if CS Lewis, and King David, and Paul are right, then it’s worth stopping to ask: what is the nature of your glory? What’s unique about your own God-given DNA that will help you to make a difference to this world – and to the unfolding story – in the way that only you can?

The end of transformation should be, if Paul is to be believed, truly glorious. But do we believe that we are being, or can be, transformed in such an ever-increasing way? CS Lewis did: To please God…to be a real ingredient in the divine happiness... to be loved by God, not merely pitied, but delighted in as an artist delights in his work or a [parent] in a [child] – it seems impossible, a weight or burden of glory which our thoughts can hardly sustain. But so it is. The Weight of Glory, SPCK.

So it is. His words echo King David, who writes that we are ‘crowned with glory and honour’ (Psalm 8). This is so counter-intuitive for

Where do you end, and ‘Christ in you, the hope of glory’ (Colossians 1) begin? Of course, we’re not completed works, thank God. But we should, nevertheless, expect to catch glimpses of who we were born to become, in the here and now. Close your eyes and try to see yourself as a living, breathing part of the kingdom that Jesus prayed would come ‘on earth as it is in heaven’. How glorious is that – at least for a start? CL75 ©Brian Draper

Autumn | Harvest | All-age worship Sam Hustwayte

provided for In this new service for Harvest, Sam Hustwayte encourages us to give thanks for our food, its variety and for the care God shows to us through his provision. Such gratitude can make a positive, liberating daily difference to our lives!

Aim To remember that God provides for us.

Bible texts Matthew 6:25-34 Psalm 111:1-6

Suggested songs For the beauty of the earth Give thanks to the Lord our God and king O, give thanks to the Lord We rejoice in the goodness of our God

Opening sentence Leader: Give thanks to the Lord our God and King, All: His love endures forever. Leader: Give thanks to the Lord our God and Creator, All: His love endures forever. Leader: Give thanks to the Lord our God and provider, All: His love endures forever.

CL75 ÂŠSam Hustwayte

Activities All of the following activities illustrate the main points of the service. Use one as an â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;openerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and place some or all of the others as best fits with your service plans. Zoo foods In advance, place around the church foods that would be appropriate for various animals (for example: hay for horses; carrots for rabbits; seed for birds; fish-food for aquarium-dwellers; bananas for monkeys; ants for anteaters; packed lunch for humans). Invite the congregation to find the foodstuffs and bring them to the front. Talk about each type of food. Who might enjoy eating this? Discuss the different types of foods that we can eat, compared to what some animals would choose. Yum or yuk! Invite everyone to spend a few minutes chatting to a neighbour

about their favourite food items – and those they find most unappetising. Can they remember their ‘best meal ever’ and their worst? Give it a go! Prepare a variety of interesting food samples: for example: sushi; lychees; dim sum; a Krispy Kreme doughnut. Talk briefly about each sample. Ask if there’s anyone present who has never tried one or more of the foods on display. Then invite several to come up and try something new – and report on their responses. Provide water and napkins. Quiz time Prepare a food quiz on the theme of matching food items to their country of origin. There’s a quiz ready for download on the website. Harvest gifts Invite the congregation to bring in gifts of food for harvest and create a display at the front of church. The gifts could be bought up during a song at the beginning of the service. These gifts could be distributed to the local community in need, a hospice; a residential home or local soup kitchen. You can be more specific in asking for particular foods according to where they will be sent. For example a local soup kitchen might prefer tinned items rather than fresh produce. Song Sing ‘Thank you Lord for this fine day’. Invite congregation members to suggest food items for inclusion in the song: ‘Thank you, Lord, for fish and chips’ and so on... You may need to do some on-thespot editing to ensure that the words will fit or have someone leading the music who is able to adapt and keep the tune going while waiting for the next suggestion.

Confession As you use confession to say sorry, leave space for people to think / say things that fit with the sentence before you follow with the phrase ‘Father in your mercy’. Leader: It is easy to forget all that God does give to us, his love and care for us. Take a moment to think of the things you eat and drink each day. Now let’s join together to say sorry for the things we may take for granted. Father, we are sorry when we have used your gifts carelessly and wasted them. Father, in your mercy, All: Forgive us and help us.

Leader: We enjoy our food but sometimes forget that you give it to us, we are sorry. Father, in your mercy, All: Forgive us and help us. Leader: We belong to a people who are full and satisfied, but ignore the cry of the hungry. Father, in your mercy, All: Forgive us and help us. Leader: We often keep things for ourselves as if there were no God in heaven. Father, in your mercy, All: Forgive us and help us. Leader: We forget to trust you to provide for us and so we worry about tomorrow. Father, in your mercy, All: Forgive us and help us. Leader: Thank you Father that you do forgive us. Thank you that we can stand before you, say sorry and be renewed. Thank you for your mercy and for your provision. All: Amen.

Reading Check the website for a PowerPoint presentation of these images (left) to accompany the reading from St Matthew’s Gospel. You may wish to use a Bible translation that differs from the one normally used, as a way of helping to ‘freshen’ this familiar passage. Why not place the reader in the congregation, if possible with a radio microphone. Check the website for a PowerPoint of the Old Testament reading (TNIV translation). CL75 ©Sam Hustwayte, Illustrations ©Brent Clark

Talk: the God who provides In advance, invite a person to be interviewed briefly as part of the talk. Choose someone who has an engaging personal testimony of God’s provision.

Sam Hustwayte is on the leadership team at St John’s, Kenilworth, and works part-time for CPAS. Her involvement in all-age worship and youth and children’s ministry stretches back over fifteen years. Sam lives in Warwickshire with her husband and three children.

Following the activities you could talk about the variety of food we can eat, how we are all different in our likes and dislikes. We are also different in how we think about things. Some people will worry more than others. Yet our readings show a God who promises to provide for us. Let’s look at why we worry. And let’s ask ‘Should we worry?’ It is so easy to worry about things that we anticipate, which may or may not happen. Some people say of their anxiety: ‘If I worry about it, maybe it won’t happen.’ Is that a good place to be? Others might worry about the smallest details of life. And others might worry about whether people like them or not. Take a moment to think about things which cause us to worry / which we think about repeatedly / about which we feel nervous. (It is important to explain the word ‘worry’ in terms that younger children will understand – try talking about it as something that makes their tummy feel funny, or the feeling of not being sure about what is going to happen). Make the point that worrying doesn’t help us at all. God our Creator wants us to trust him to look after every aspect of our lives: from ‘big picture’ right down to the smallest detail. He doesn’t ignore those who depend on him. If we are trying to follow God in our lives, he will listen. Sometimes our worrying can indicate a lack of understanding of God’s love for us, and also a lack of trust. Worrying about the future uses up energy that otherwise would go into living today. Worrying can be more harmful than helpful in how you feel inside. Of course, there are real challenges and issues that God wants us to face, but worrying can distract us from them. Living one day at a time keeps us from being consumed by worry. When do we worry about things – when the future is uncertain, when we are lying awake at night, when someone says something unhelpful? There are many reasons we can and do worry. But we can deliberately hand over these thoughts and feelings to God. And if God is with us, we can be strong.

Prayer suggestions Wall Prepare a ‘graffiti board’ and provide a variety of coloured marker pens. Invite people to draw pictures of a favourite food (or meal). Some may wish to write a short prayer. Create the wall with lining paper attached to a wall (not too high) or a screen. Alternatively, simply use flipchart paper. Fruity Pre-cut a variety of fruit-shaped pieces of paper (outlines on the website) and distribute them to the congregation as they come into church. Have a quiet time for the congregation to write or draw their prayers on the fruit shapes and then invite them to bring them to the front and place them in a shopping basket or a trug. These could be used as part of a display that will remind people of the harvest service.

Is it ever right to worry? We can test that by looking at what happens when we have that thought. If we start to panic inside, then the feeling we have is worry and that’s not good. Of course we may start to feel motivated to do something to change the circumstances that are causing us to worry, and that is probably a good feeling – concern, rather than worry.

Rice corner Cook some rice and spoon portions into cake cases. Keep refrigerated until just before the service. Place the portions on a tray or small table. Invite people to take a rice portion – and eat it quietly, while praying for those experiencing lack of food. This could be linked to a collection for an aid agency.

God has made us all unique but has also provided for us with immense creativity, as we can see from all the varieties of food that we have been talking about. He is a loving God who wants the best for us his children and so provides variety for us every day in the big and the small things of life.

Leader: Thank you Lord that you do provide for us, that each day your mercies are new and you meet our needs. As we go through this week help us to remember more and more how much you care for us.

Let’s respond with prayers full of praise and gratitude.

Closing words and blessing

Freely you have received, freely give. Go in peace to love and serve the Lord. All: In the name of Christ. Amen.

Archive Check the Church Leadership website for a full list of our downloadable resources for Harvest. Resources Check the website of the major Christian aid agencies for ready-to-use Harvest service outlines: www.tearfund.org; www.christianaid.org. 18

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ARC The Arthur Rank Centre works throughout the UK to serve ‘the rural community and its churches’. Check the website for resources related to Harvest: www.arthurrankcentre.org.uk. Harvest home Have you created your own worship resources for Harvest? How did they go? Why not share them with the Church Leadership community? Please contact us via cl@cpas.org.uk.

Children | Halloween | All Saints Sam Hustwayte Recent years have brought a spook-tacular increase in celebrations of Halloween. Sam Hustwayte shows how a local church can offer a ghoul-free alternative that’s safe, fun-filled and brightly attractive to non-church members.

Why? The ‘darkness’ of All Hallows Eve (Halloween) on 31 October is the ‘shadow side’ of All Hallows (All Saints’) Day on 1 November, when we celebrate the glorious company of the ‘church triumphant’ in heaven. Considering that Jesus offers everyone a free-of-charge invitation to this everlasting party, we shouldn’t need to make excuses for marking the occasion with a bit of a do.

What? Create a short party, centred on food, games and craft activities. The activities here are focused on the 5-14 age group, but with the addition of an all-age activity (a beetle drive, for example) the party could include all ages.

When? Until recently I favoured timing the party on Halloween itself. This was fine if the aim was to provide a fun ‘alternative’ for church members. But it was a non-starter as far as attracting non-church people was concerned. We now schedule the party just before 31 October – children invite their friends and, consequently, a lot of ‘outside’ people enjoy a positive churchbased experience at which they have a lot of fun – and get to hear about Jesus.

How? We organise a two-in-one party, with food at its centre. The 5-9s’ party starts at 5.30pm and lasts an hour. Food is served from 6.30 to 7.00 with the 10-14s age group invited to arrive in time to share the food, before the departure of the younger ones and the kick-off of their party at 7.00. Hot dogs are simple to prepare – and always popular.

Games Torch game In advance invite everyone to bring a battery-powered or wind-up

light fantastic! flashlight with them. You’ll need equal numbers of drinking straws in no more than two colours, plus a smaller set of black straws. Scatter the straws over the playing area. Divide participants into two teams and assign each a colour to match those of the scattered straws: say, red and green. Their challenge, on the word ‘Go!’, is to find as many of ‘their’ straws as possible. In addition they should look for the harder-to-find black straws. They’ll be awarded one point for each coloured straw collected. Black straws attract 5 points each. Absolutely no hiding of the rival team’s straws allowed: 10 points deducted per infringement! Lighthouse A volunteer stands at one end of the room, holding a torch at chest level. This is the lighthouse. Create a series of obstacles/screens to partially block the torch beam as the lighthouse light ‘revolves’. All players stand at far end of the space. Their challenge is to reach the lighthouse end of the space without being picked up in the beam. Appoint three or four ‘observers’. Cut the overhead lights. And go! Chocolate game Divide the players into groups of equal size (maximum of 6 per group). At the centre of each group place knife, fork, plate (with wrapped chocolate bar on it), woolly hat, scarf, pair of gloves – and a die. On the word ‘Go!’ participants start throwing the die as they pass it around the circle. The first participant to throw a six dons the garments and starts opening the chocolate

bar with the knife and fork. Meanwhile the die continues to be passed around, with subsequent six-throwers taking over the attack on the chocolate. The winner is first team to consume the chocolate.

Crafts ‘Stained-glass’ widows Prepare A5 templates of black card with pre-cut candle / lighthouse / angel designs. Use tissue paper and PVA glue to complete the ‘windows’. If you wish, participants can use gold/silver pen to decorate the card. Acetate windows Pre-print window designs onto A4 acetate sheets. These can then be decorated using water-based glass paints – or thick-nibbed water-based glass pens (available from craft shops). Wax resist Create candle / angel / lighthouse images on thick paper using white and yellow wax crayons. Cover the design with a colour wash of a black or indigo ink. The wax design will shine through. Edibles Decorate digestive biscuits with pre-mixed icing. Enliven with sprinkles.

Talk I always include a very short talk on the theme of things that scare us, including the uncertainty caused by being in the dark. Link this to the truth that Jesus is the light of the world. And I make available relevant leaflets from the Christian Publicity Organisation (www.cpo-online.org).

Music Duggie Dug Dug’s lively songs always fit the bill (www.duggiedugdug.org)

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All-age worship | Christ the King | Advent Rachel Rosborough

Christ the king The church’s year closes late in November with the celebration of our risen, glorified, reigning Saviour. What better way to lead into the season of Advent than with a joyful celebration of Jesus our King? Rachel Rosborough offers an all-new outline for all-age worship.

Hymn/song suggestions The Servant King King of Kings Majesty Meekness and Majesty The King of Love My Shepherd Is Crown Him with Many Crowns

Bible readings 1 Samuel 8:4-20; John 18:33-37.

Talk outline 1 The playing-card images can be downloaded from the website. The aim of the talk is to contrast two types of king: the King of Clubs and the King of Hearts. The first type is the kind of king that we often think of and the kind that the people of the Old Testament thought they wanted: a king who is powerful, strong and mighty in battle. The second type of king is Jesus: a king who rules and reigns in a different way, the way of love, service and sacrifice. Begin by talking about monarchs and ask people, especially the children, to describe some characteristics of a king. They are likely to make comments that include wealthy, powerful and strong. Develop this by explaining that the people in the Old Testament (1 Samuel 8:4-20) thought they wanted this kind of king. He is wealthy, he is powerful. His soldiers and officials obey him – or they face the consequences. People look up to this kind of king and seek to serve him and please 20

him because of his position and may be fearful because of their own position. A king like this has a certain type of kingdom. It is one that favours strength, status and human power and achievements and may be established and maintained by force. It relies on power. The ‘King of Clubs’ is the visual aid for this aspect of the talk. Pontius Pilate asked Jesus if he was a king (John 18:33-37). Pilate would have had in mind a similar kind of king to the one described above. Explain that today is the day the Church celebrates Christ the King and that Jesus was a totally different type of king from what we usually imagine a king to be. Either do so yourself, or, if appropriate, get others to suggest words to describe, the kind of king that Jesus is. You’ll want to draw out words like love, kindness, inclusiveness and servant – in short, the King of Hearts. Explain that the kingdom that Jesus came to proclaim, the kingdom of God, is a different kind of kingdom. It turns our everyday ideas upside-down. This kingdom includes the weak and the poor, the hungry and the outsider and is open to all, not just the powerful and wealthy or the strong. End by asking how we should be ruled – by a King of Clubs, driven by power and status and human abilities – or by the King of Hearts, motivated by love and service and welcome for all.

Talk outline 2 You will need a cross made from two pieces of wood, which, when turned upside down, is also a toy sword. As with with Talk 1, start by asking people to describe a king. As they do, hold the ‘sword’ and develop the idea of a king of power and force. The Jewish people were expecting a powerful king to come and liberate them from the oppressive rule of the Romans. Jesus didn’t behave as they expected a king to behave. He came to love, to serve, to help the weak and the poor and to bring everyone back to God. Now turn the ‘sword’ round so that it is clearly a cross. Jesus reverses our ideas of what it means to be a king. Everything seemed lost when he was killed. It seemed as if he had been defeated. End by speaking of the resurrection as the ultimate triumph and proof that Christ is king over all of life and even death.

The Rev Rachel Rosborough is curate at Holy Apostles, Charlton Kings, Cheltenham. She and her husband Sam have two children.

Film clips

Stir-up Sunday

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The festival of Christ the King is celebrated on the Sunday preceding Advent Sunday. Slightly confusingly, this is also known to many as ‘Stir-up Sunday’, a title originating in the day’s appointed ‘collect’ prayer: ‘Stir up, O Lord, the wills of your faithful people; that they, plenteously bringing forth the fruit of good works, may by you be plenteously rewarded; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.’

The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe The White Witch is the one who appears to have the power, but it is Aslan who rules, even though he is murdered. Also the children are a surprising choice to be in battle alongside him. Shrek Princess Fiona is a ‘different’ kind of royalty, guarding her secret identity as an ogress. The Lion King Themes here include the sad death of the good king Mufasa and the pressure on his son, Simba, to be king. And then of course there’s the villainous Scar who yearns to be very much the wrong kind of king.

Bidding prayers World Invite people to think of places in the world where there is unjust or oppressive rule – if you are able, you may want to show pictures of situations currently in the news. Leader: Lord as we think of these places, we long for your kingdom to come. For swords and weapons to be put aside and love and peace to reign in people’s hearts.

And with Christmas only five weeks away, the injunction to ‘stir up’ became the traditional cue for people to start making their Christmas puddings. The link with the festival of Christ the King is simply coincidental. But, in case you wish to include a pudding-related element to the service... Explain that this is traditionally the day when Christmas puddings are made, and stirred. Show some of the individual ingredients for a Christmas pudding (or cake) and remind everyone that a pudding cannot be made from only one ingredient. It has to be a mixture of lots of different things coming together. You may like to invite children to taste some of the individual ingredients. Explain that when they are all stirred together, and when they have been left for their various flavours to intermingle, then the pudding is made and it tastes good. Liken this to the church. It cannot be made of only one type of person. It must be made up of lots of different individuals with their own gifts and personalities that God has called together to make something good. If you are brave, you might like to get people to help you make a Christmas pudding, to be eaten on Christmas Day in your church.

All: Amen. Home Ask people to picture the people they live with, or those they are responsible for, or work with – if appropriate you may ask people to put their hands on the shoulders of those near them. Leader: Lord as we think of these people, we long for your kingdom to come. For our homes, churches, schools and places of work to be places of love and peace. Amen. Us: Ask people to think of their own lives and particularly anything they are finding difficult – people may like to put their hands together or on their chest. Leader: Lord as we think of ourselves, we long for your kingdom to come. For the things we struggle with and find difficult, bring us your peace and help us to trust you as King.

Activity prayers While some music is played, ask people to visit different areas of the church to pray in the way they find helpful. You may like to set up prayer stations as follows. Crowns Prepare cardboard crowns to decorate/write prayers on as a reminder that Jesus is King. World Map Display a world map. Invite people to write prayers for peace on Postit notes (maybe heart-shaped?) for places in the world where there is violence, oppression or struggle. These should be attached to the map. Leave the map up in church for ongoing prayer.

Bowl of water and towel Ask people to dip their hands in the bowl, remembering that Jesus, King of all creation, also knelt and washed his disciples’ feet, even those of his betrayer. Ask people to pray for help to serve others, especially those who are difficult. King of Hearts playing card reproduce (or project) the playing-card image at high magnification. Place cushions or kneelers nearby. Invite people to kneel in the presence of the real King of love and pray quietly, perhaps for those who are in particular need. Alternatively, use a traditional icon image of Jesus.

All: Amen. Advent Check the website for a variety of resources for the season of Advent. Stations The theme of the suffering king is developed in the series of Stations of the Cross images from Church Leadership 62. CL75 ©Rachel Rosborough, Illustrations ©Andy Robb, PHOTO: i-stockphoto.com/ redmal

All Souls | Bereavement | Remembrance Marie Calvert

a time to mourn Acknowledging that death is part of life, the festival of All Souls (2 November) offers a rare opportunity to provide a ‘safe space’ for people to gather and remember their departed loved ones, perhaps in the context of a bereavement service. Marie Calvert offers guidance and two practical resources.

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Church Leadership 69 included ‘A time to remember’ – an outline for a commemoration of the departed (bereavement service). One or other of the activities outlined here could be included within that basic outline.

As multi-sensory people living in a multi-sensory world, it can really help our worship to include elements which are visual, tactile and symbolic – especially when dealing with difficult and complex emotions. With this in mind I have outlined two multi-sensory approaches which you could use/adapt and weave into your own bereavement service. A note of caution: there can be a danger in assuming that everyone who comes to a ‘bereavement service’ (or whatever you choose to call it) is feeling very sad and grief-stricken. The reality of the grief journey, of course, is that people may be at any number of different ‘stages’. Some may be fondly giving thanks for a loved one who died long ago. For others the grief may be raw and fresh. Some may be experiencing a sense of relief (and perhaps feeling guilty about that). For still others there may be anger (possibly at God, at doctors, at the deceased, at themselves/others), resentment, remorse, depression, and so on. Grief encompasses a complicated mixture of feelings, and our liturgy and any symbolic actions need to be broad enough to allow for this. We need to encourage people to come exactly as they are, and, above all, never to push people into taking part in anything.

Marie Calvert is an arts psychotherapist and a leader of retreats and workshops. She lives in Leamington Spa.

Bulb planting There are many Biblical references to the natural cycle of sowing and reaping: John 12; Luke 8; Psalm 126:5-6. The act of planting something that looks lifeless (such as a bulb) can be very powerful – especially in this context – as we bury it and trust that in the soil of God’s love something new will grow in due time. This symbolism is two-fold: firstly, trusting that the deceased will be born into God’s eternal life, and secondly, knowing that even our complex, grief feelings can be ‘ploughed back in’ and transformed by God into some (as yet unimagined) form of new life. Provide a large pot filled with fresh earth/compost. You may need several pots to ensure enough space for everyone to plant their bulb. You could also have a small cross next to the pot(s), and perhaps a vase of flowers. As people arrive, offer them a small bulb (for example: crocus or snowdrop). At a suitable point towards the end of the service, invite people to hold their bulb in the palm of their hand and to consider it. A bulb looks dead, but it has all the potential for new life within it. Invite people to think about their loved one, and the kind of relationship they had with them, the things they miss, their own feelings about the loss. Then invite them to come and plant the bulb, as a way of placing the person and also their own feelings into the fertile soil of God’s life-giving love. You may want to play some quiet instrumental music during this time, to allow people to do this thoughtfully without rushing. It is good if they can plant the bulb by hand (assuming the compost is not heavy or soaking), but you can offer a small trowel if preferred. Have some handwashing gel and tissues available too. Be aware that some people may not feel able to plant the bulb – it can be hard to let go of a loved one and they may not be ready for this, and that is fine. Give people freedom to choose, and to take the bulb home if they prefer. At the end of this activity, you could use a corporate prayer as follows to gather all the prayers together: Lord of life, we come in faith and hope this day, To place our loved ones into the fertile soil of your love, Trusting in your tender care and mercy, Believing in your power to grow new life out of death. Lord of hope, we come just as we are this day, Filled with turmoil and commotion, Trusting you to hold us firm through the storm, Believing in your power to speak peace into our pain. Lord of love, we come with our memories this day, Our sadness and our thankfulness, Trusting in your eternal springtime, Believing in your power to hold and to heal. Amen.

Tree of life Have ready a small growing tree or shrub in a pot, preferably with a good number of leaves so it looks alive. An evergreen is good (symbolising God’s everlasting love), but it needs to have some clear branches – rather than be a dense green bush. As people come in, give them a piece of paper/card cut into the shape of a leaf, threaded with a length of thread/ wool (like a luggage label) and have pens available. At a suitable point in the service, say a little about the Biblical ‘tree of life’, referring to its place in God’s original plan (Genesis 2), Next mention St John’s wonderful picture of the tree of life at the entrance to the Holy City or paradise (Revelation 22:12-14). Invite people to write the name of their loved one on the leaf and to come and tie it to the tree, as a way of committing that person into God’s eternal, loving care. Quiet background music can be helpful during this time, and someone may need to be available to help with the tying. You may wish to use a prayer like the one below at the end of this activity: Lord of all life, Alpha and Omega, beginning and end, we entrust into your care those people who have been so special to us, whose memories we cherish, whose presence we miss. Help us to know your comfort in our sadness, your strength in our weakness, and your new life springing up through all the seasons of our lives. Amen.

You may also wish to conclude this time by reading Romans 8:35-39. Let everyone know where the planted bulbs will be kept over the winter, assuring them that they will be brought back into church when flowering is imminent – a visible testimony to God’s transforming power.

A time to remember Check the Church Leadership website for other resources for All Souls’ commemorations. Times and Seasons This Church of England resource includes resources for All Souls and a commemoration of the departed. It’s available via the Church of England website. CL75 ©Marie Calvert

Spiritual life | Leadership | Resources

the leadership moment A new Grove booklet focuses on the relationship that matters most for any Christian leader – his or her relationship with God. Authors Sue Howard and Chris Blakeley explain...

You write about ‘the leadership moment’ – what’s this all about? It is in small moments that we make a big difference as leaders – a key decision, a crucial conversation. Most of our shortcomings as leaders are not to do with lack of knowledge, compassion or ability – rather we fail to notice what is really needed from us in a particular time, situation or relationship. ‘The eye is the lamp of the body’ – what we notice is what we make happen. If you look at Christ’s leadership you will see how incredibly aware he is of the significance of even apparently small situations and what is really going on in the hearts and minds of the people involved in them. A rich young man, a woman at a well, an adulteress facing punishment, the tricks of the Pharisees, a Passover supper, his trial before Pilate. His ministry is characterised by a constant awareness of the historical kairos on the one hand and the individual soul’s needs on the other. This awareness obviously stemmed from his constant intimacy with the Father. And you stress the idea of ‘conversion’ as an ongoing process... The moment one believes in Christ, a journey begins. Whilst we become accepted in God’s sight through faith, we are also called to ‘repent’ – to turn towards a life of obedience to God. Our sole leadership purpose is to become agents of his will, or

‘channels of his peace’. The biggest challenge we face is simply keeping the channel open! We are called to be transformed by the renewing of our minds and this is an ongoing process which continues until our dying day! To become a ‘new creation’ in Christ requires us to be disciplined about spending ‘quality’ time with God so that we can yield our life to his guidance and shaping. God gently strips out our false attachments and renews us with spiritual insights, gifts and treasures that we may not be aware of initially when we are ‘young’ Christians. This journey may take us to places we did not expect, but if our hand is in God’s hand we can be sure of the outcome. What is of great interest to us is the specific way God works in a person’s life and how the church can become more fully supportive of the transformational spiritual journey. How would you help a leader seeking advice about developing the inner life? Three words come to mind: listening, listening and more listening! Listening to God, listening to self, listening to others. The foundation of the inner life is learning to listen to God, which St Benedict describes as ‘inclining the ear of your heart’. This is best learned in a quiet place. So we would suggest time in a retreat setting. We would also encourage all leaders to find a spiritual friend whom they can meet with regularly in order to pray and discern together. As well as strengthen-

Chris Blakeley founded Waverley Learning in 2000. He leads retreats and is an experienced spiritual director. Sue Howard founded Holistic Leadership in 2008. She offers spiritual mentoring and accompaniment to business leaders.

ing listening, this provides a sense of accountability and commitment. The listening that is learnt in these ‘set aside’ times gradually infuses one’s life amidst the busyness, creating the possibility of spotting one’s ‘leadership moments’. Is this responsibility to look after one’s inner life an individual matter? We each need to work out our own salvation. But this is a journey that is almost always undertaken in community. No one but God can see into a person’s heart – it is therefore an entirely personal response to God. But God has set us into the church family so others who are similarly being led on a spiritual journey can offer insights, new perspectives, support and guidance. The shared experience of community is both reassuring and challenging. Can you identify some key resources to help a leader to develop in this way? The Grove booklet, naturally! We’d also recommend Henri Nouwen’s In the Name of Jesus which helps people to recognise and understand the distractions of leadership. Christopher Jameson’s Finding Sanctuary is an accessible introduction to Benedictine teaching. Frank Laubach’s Practising His Presence presents a fascinating challenge for all of us seeking to walk closer with Christ. Sacred Rhythms by Ruth Haley Barton is a particularly clear, practical, deep book.

The Inner Life of a Christian Leader, Chris Blakeley, Sue Howard, Grove/CPAS, £3.95 Available from CPAS.

Athena Drive, Tachbrook Park, WARWICK CV34 6NG T 01926 458458 E info@cpas.org.uk W www.cpas.org.uk