CPH POST 27 June - 15 August 2019

SPECIAL FEATURE

TAKE YOUR

Our overview of 25 of this summer’s top festivals includes options for families and even events in Sweden and Germany

FREE PAPER

18-19

Diplomacy

Diplomacy Magazine’s summer outing is packed full of interviews, political analysis and event coverage

E GAZIN 8 MAER 2019 - ISSUE SUMM

ABOUT R TALKS ASSADO NTRY AN AMB HIS COU ROMANI MOTING • THE AND PRO SAFE THE EU P EUROPE G TO KEE HELPIN • OSCE: 50 M AT CE JOACHI • PRIN

COMPRE

DANISH NEWS IN ENGLISH CPHPOST.DK VOL 22 ISSUE 11 28 June - 15 August 2019

SPECIAL EDITION

HENSIV

E GUIDE

TO AMB

ASSADO

MAR RS IN DEN

INSIDE K

NEWS What if Vesterbrogade was closed off?

2

SPORT

Hard on Hareide?

National coach to be replaced by Superliga winner

FORSAKEN BUT NOT DETERRED

7

Waiting’s over: Mette’s here!

Socialdemokratiet leader is the youngest ever Danish PM COMMUNITY Fun in the sun: Yoga in the park and larks with Big Sam

14-15 HISTORY

Banner from heaven?

Exploring how the Dannebrog was really born

17 PRINT VERSION ISSN: ONLINE VERSION ISSN:

2446-0184 2446-0192

9 771398 100009

D

ENMARK has a new PM. Socialdemokratiet leader Mette Frederiksen, 41, is the youngest in Danish history and only the country’s second female leader Late on Tuesday June 25, Frederiksen confirmed she had the green light from fellow red bloc parties – Socialistisk Folkeparti, Radikale and Enhedslisten – to form a minority S government following a successful General Election on June 5 in which they secured 91 of the 179 seats in Parliament.

Closing in on record FREDERIKSEN took 20 days

to reach a consensus – the longest period spent on forming a new government since Poul Schlüter took 24 days in 1988.

On Wednesday, she was due to ask for the queen’s permission.

Lots of promises AS PART of the parties’ agreement, there is binding climate legislation that aims to reduce emissions by 70 percent, along with a pledge to attract more foreign workers and introduce minimum quotas for daycare institutions.

Plans to use the island of Lindholm for criminal foreigners have been scrapped, and the government intends to remove child asylum-seekers from the Sjælsmark centre and once again accept quota refugees.

4

Volatile weather

Lars eyes EU presidency

A WHIRLWIND, which overturned two cars in Aabenraa in southern Jutland on June 14, was blamed on thunderstorms throwing hot and cold air together. In what has been a volatile fortnight, DMI was predicting 75 mm of rain for Copenhagen on June 15, but it failed to materialise. Meanwhile temperatures have been warm – as high as 29 degrees on June 26.

FORMER PM Lars Løkke Rasmussen is in contention to become the president of the EU. A day after pledging his support for Danish candidate Margrethe Vestager, the European competition commissioner, he told DR on June 21 that “if they suddenly think they need a pragmatic, middle-aged, cold-blooded, liberal Scandinavian, then they can just call.”

Two of the world’s best

Return of the podcast

NOMA 2.0 and Geranium were on Tuesday confirmed as the planet’s second and fifth best eateries at the World’s 50 Best Restaurants awards ceremony in Singapore. Noma, a four-time winner between 2010 and 2014, was pipped to the top spot by Restaurant Mirazur of France, while Geranium jumped 14 places on 2018.

THE CPH POST website has started hosting a new podcast.

Global Denmark Podcast is produced by Thomas Mulhern, the managing director of global talent specialists Globally Local, and Ed Ley, the CEO of Absolute Health.

Among their first 25 interviews are former US ambassador Rufus Gifford, TV host Timm Vladimir and British author Helen Russell.

2

NEWS

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

Giving the city room to breathe

ONLINE THIS WEEK COPENHAGEN Municipality has authorised a limit of 200 electric scooters in the busiest parts of the city centre, along with an overall limit of 3,000 for the city.

Scooter providers Lime, Tier, and Voi have already sent a letter to the municipality stating that the limit is too low and will result in higher rental prices. The limits will kick in after the summer.

City Hall rape charge A RAPE occurred on April 1 at a party hosted by Ninna Hedeager Olsen, the deputy mayor for technology and the environment, and now her former Enhedslisten colleague has been charged. It is claimed the victim was too drunk to fend off the attack and that another woman, who was asleep at the time, was groped. No trial date has been set.

Dr Daterape guilty

New bio-waste measures COPENHAGEN Municipality will collect bio-waste every week over the summer, compared to just once a fortnight from October until May. New rules will also be issued to maximise homeowners’ efforts.

Proposal to close the lower end of Vesterbrogade around the entrance to Tivoli RUCHI PUJARI

W

ORKING in collaboration with Tivoli, the Gehl architecture firm has released an artist’s impression of what central Copenhagen would look like if the lower end of Vesterbrogade was closed off to vehicle traffic.

The area outside the main Tivoli entrance between Bernstorffsgade and Rådhuspladsen, which would still have cycle paths, would be far more friendly to the expected increase in pedestrians brought on by the opening of the Metro City Ring this autumn.

Roll with it? Some might say it’s an oasis in the city centre

Pedestrians rule GEHL’S analysis of the street revealed that foot traffic tended to dominate despite the prioritisation of traffic and that confrontations with cyclists were common.

However, Mogens Fosgerau, a traffic economics professor at the University of Copenhagen, warns that the decision will impact many commuters, and that some will quit their jobs as a result.

BIG to design hotel IN RELATED news, Tivoli has hired architect firm Bjarke Ingels Group to design the HC Andersen Hotel with a sustainable focus.

The project will include the refurbishment of the 1893 Tivoli castle, a renovation of the 1883 Panorama Pavilion and the construction of a new 18-storey pagoda.

Memorials to Holocaust victims ‘Stumbling stones’ have been laid across the city as a tribute to 12 of the victims CHRISTIAN WENANDE

G

ERMAN artist Gunter Demnig has just visited Copenhagen to lay down 12 stumbling stones – dedications to some of the Danish Jews killed in the Holocaust.

Since 1992, Demnig has laid down 75,000 of the stones in front of homes where Jews were picked up by the Nazis during WWII, deported to concentration camps and killed.

Finally in Denmark BUT DESPITE 480 Danish Jews being moved to the Theresienstadt camp, where 52 died, Demnig had not visited Denmark until now, with the country becoming the 25th to receive the special stones.

The stumbling stones are granite cobblestones with an attached copper plate engraved with the name and birth date of the victim, date of transportation to the concentration camp and eventual fate.

Contributions website AMONG the locations honoured with the stones are Krystalgade, Bredgade,

Founded in 1998

by San Shepherd All rights reserved.

Published by cphpost.dk ApS. Printed by Dansk Avistryk A/S

SNUBLESTEN.ORG

A GENTOFTE Hospital doctor has been sentenced to seven years in prison for raping two women who he drugged in the spring of 2018. Jack Hou, 32, who has been struck off, should have known that drugging the women carried its own dangers, the court ruled.

Hou, who has appealed, must additionally pay the victims 90,000 and 107,800 kroner.

Closed for its own good GEHL

City centre scooter limit

Editorial offices: International House, Gyldenløvesgade 11, 1600 Copenhagen Denmark

28 June - 15 August 2019

Stories behind the stones

Sølvgade, Ravnsborg Tværgade, Prinsessegade, Rantzausgade, Carl Plougs Vej, Nørregade and Borgmestervangen.

The public can visit snublesten. org and volunteer to sponsor one of the stones, which costs about 900 kroner to make and lay down on the pavement. The website also includes information about the victims.

BØRNEHAVEN Rosenly, the kindergarten at the centre of the worst case of paedophilia in recent times, has been closed down

by Albertslund Municipality.

In 2017 one of its workers was found guilty of abusing 28 children over a period of 20 years.

The kindergarten’s absenteeism rate was 3.3 days a month this year, compared to a national average of 1.1.

Three suspicious deaths THE POLICE are investigating three deaths in Gundestrup, Ruds Vedby and Vemmelev in west Zealand in February, April and June respectively, which they suspect are related. All three involved house-fires, and in at least one case the victim was killed before the fire, while in another a body was discovered in a gravel pit two days after the blaze.

Washrooms closed THE WASHROOMS beneath City Hall Square are to be closed permanently. A favourite haunt of backpackers and the homeless since 1943, the shower and toilet area was temporarily closed in 2010 ahead of work beginning on the Metro City Ring. The area will now be used as a family room where parents can change their babies’ nappies.

Two drown in Køge Bay TWO PEOPLE died following a boating accident in Køge Bay on the night of June 19. Of four people picked up by the coastguard, one drowned in the water, one died at hospital and two survived. None of the four were wearing life jackets.

To advertise – call 24 20 24 11 or email sales@cphpost.dk

Fredensborg is located in northeast Zealand

To tell us your story – call 93 93 92 01 or email news@cphpost.dk For all other inquiries – email info@cphpost.dk

Ejvind Sandal

Hans Hermansen

Ben Hamilton

Christian Wenande

Stephen Gadd

Hasse Ferrold

Tanya Vinogradova

CO-OWNER

CEO

EDITOR

NEWS/LAYOUT EDITOR

JOURNALIST

PHOTOGRAPHER

PHOTOGRAPHER

NEWS

28 June - 15 August 2019

ONLINE THIS WEEK Cynical election reaction

ANDERS Fogh Rasmussen, the former Danish PM, supports the US’s threat to impose economic sanctions should the controversial Nord Stream 2 gas pipeline between Russia and Germany go ahead.

Opponents of the project view it as part of a long-term Russian strategy to make Europe dependent on Russian gas.

POLITICAL commentators across Europe hailed Socialdemokratiet’s victory in the Danish General Election as a game-changer for the continent – and as a little bit cynical as well. The win showed “how much Europe has normalised anti-immigrant politics”, noted Vice, and it was reported as “Social Democracy with an Inhumane Face” in counterpunch.org.

Woz wed in Tuscany CAROLINE Wozniacki married former NBA player David Lee on June 15 at the Castiglion del Bosco vineyard in the Tuscany province of Siena. Guests included NBA stars Pau Gasol and Harrison Barnes, NFL player Jesse Palmer, and tennis stars Angelique Kerber and Serena Williams, who was reportedly one of the bridesmaids.

Dane a German mayor DANISH furniture dealer Claus Ruhe Madsen has become the first ever non-German to become a mayor of a German city. The 46-year-old, who stood for election in Rostock as an independent, was born and raised in Denmark, but has lived in Germany for around 26 years.

His manifesto mostly concerned the environment, business, and digitalisation.

Health record breach A LARGE group of IT employees at the US firm Epic have access to personal health records of patients in Denmark, according to a new report released by the law firm Bech-Bruun. The Epic staff can access the data via the Health Platform, an e-journal documenting the health records of patients that serves as a point of reference for doctors.

Hydrogen precautions DENMARK has decided to close all eight of its hydrogen tank stations following an explosion in Norway at a station in the town of Sandvika about 10 km outside of Oslo. The explosion on June 10 caused a considerable amount of damage and two people were taken to A & E. A further 10 stations were closed in Norway.

Happy holidays: IKEA on the hunt IKEA DENMARK is hosting a global competition in search of a ‘Happiness Hunter’.

The winner will spend two weeks in Copenhagen in September to sample life in one of the happiest nations in the world.

They will receive an average Danish salary and be filmed to help IKEA understand if happiness arises from the Danes’ authentic life at home. The deadline to apply is July 1.

Fifth most peaceful in world Despite involvement in wars, Denmark continues to be a rankings leader in global index CHRISTIAN WENANDE

Deaths in Iceland and NZ

F

TWO DANES – a mother and son – were among three fatalities in a plane crash near a small airfield at Fljotshild in Iceland on June 10. The third victim, the father, was an Icelander, while two other family members survived. In related news, the 21-year-old Danish hunter discovered dead in the Karangarua Valley in New Zealand has been identified as Jonas Legaard Sørensen.

Number five ACCORDING to the freshly-published 2019 Global Peace Index, Denmark is among the most peaceful countries in the world – coming in fifth behind leaders Iceland, New Zealand, Portugal and Austria.

The Danes dropped one spot compared to last year thanks to Portugal jumping up two spots from fifth to third.

Nuuk mayor resigns ASII CHEMNITZ Narup, the mayor of Greenlandic capital Nuuk, has resigned after a decade in chage after criticism in a DR documentary entitled ‘Byen, hvor børn forsvinder’ (the city where children disappear), which claims every third child in the suburb of Tasilaq has been sexually assaulted, while every other child has a social welfare casefile.

Syria child evacuations THE FOREIGN Ministry has evacuated a 13-year old Danish boy, the son of a deceased IS warrior, from a northern Syrian camp to have emergency treatment – barely a week after the French authorities rescued two boys of similar age with Danish and French heritage from nearby camps. Belgium, Norway, Sweden and the Netherlands are also busy retrieving children from the region.

Integrating Romanians KULTUREL Forbindelse together with the Romanian Embassy have announced the implementation of a new project, ‘Resident in Denmark: rights, obligations, integration’, which aims to integrate the Romanian community into Danish society.

Recognition for Helena THE FORMER Danish supermodel Helena Christensen has been named a goodwill ambassador of UNHCR, the UN Refugee Organisation. The title recognises the photographer for her extensive charity work in countries such as Rwanda, Ukraine and Colombia.

PIXABAY

Fogh supports US stance

3

ROM A RELAXED work-life balance to low crime levels, life in Denmark is pretty chilled compared to most places.

Iceland top “ICELAND remains the most peaceful country in the world – a position it has held since 2008,” the index noted.

“Bhutan has recorded the largest improvement of any country in the top 20,

Hopefully not an ivory tower

rising 43 places in the last 12 years.”

US and Russia struggling THE INDEX ranks countries based on 24 parameters spread across three main domains: Safety and Security, Ongoing Conflict, and Militarisation.

Canada, Singapore, Slovenia, Japan and the Czech Republic completed the top 10, while other notables included Australia (13), Finland (14), Sweden (18), Norway (20), Germany (22), the UK (45), South Korea (55), France (60), China (110), Brazil (116), the US (128), India (141) and Russia (154).

Afghanistan was ranked last at 163rd, just ahead of Syria, South Sudan, Yemen and Iraq.

4

COVER

28 June - 15 August 2019

Tied up in red tape applying for family reunification with himself

EMILE YOUNG

G

IVEN DENMARK’S restrictive views on immigration, it’s no surprise that immigrants are finding it harder than ever to stay.

Just this March, a new law signalled a shift from integrating refugees towards repatriation, whilst tightening the residency permit framework for all immigrants to the extent that even applicants with strong ties to Denmark are being asked to leave.

Though not directly impacted by the new laws, the restrictive immigration climate is making it hard for immigrants like Nigerian student Alphosus Udoh, 20, to stay in Denmark.

He has been given a date by which to leave the country, and his subsequent appeals have been met with bureaucratic red tape.

Where is home?

UDOH, an orphan, has spent his formative years in Copenhagen since arriving from Nigeria five years ago as a dependent on his older brother’s study visa.

During this time, he has completed an upper-secondary education and just finished the second year of his bachelor’s degree in chemical engineering at Aalborg University.

Last year, following his brother’s completion of a PhD, both were asked to leave Denmark by 5 December 2018 – a directive that Udoh’s brother, his sole remaining relative, complied to by relocating to Canada.

But he was unable to take Udoh, as he is no longer a minor. Ahead of the deadline, Udoh accordingly submitted a

completed permanent residency application based on his strong ties to Denmark.

Udoh, after all, has built his entire adult life in Copenhagen, and Nigeria is his home in name only, he maintains.

“When I moved here, I moved here pretty young. I’ve had all of my education here, I’ve worked here, and every job I’ve had has been in Denmark,” he explained.

“If I arrived at the airport today in Nigeria, I don’t even know where I’m supposed to go.

Other than the fact that I have a Nigerian passport, I don’t really know what I’m supposed to do.”

Model citizen UDOH HAS worked multiple jobs throughout his education, as he has not benefited from the SU state educational grant.

His former colleague, Mads Damsboe Fonsner, describes him as a hardworking young man who has held down multiple jobs while studying full-time.

“He is one of the most integrated people I know – sometimes more than myself I feel,” enthused Fonsner.

“Studying at university, working two jobs, speaking our language – I mean I just don’t get it. He has more connection to Denmark than his home country; his life and friends are here in Denmark. I would really hate to see one of my closest friends having to leave the country.”

Udoh’s classmate Anna Keisha Boateng concurs that Udoh is not only a hardworking employee, but also a hardworking student whose goal is to obtain a master’s degree and really contribute to Danish society.

“He doesn’t receive any money from the state, and he has always been working, as well as going to school. He has never done anything criminal, and he is doing great at school. He is very smart, and is getting great grades,” she contended.

“It is a true loss for Danish society, throwing away a per-

PIXABAY

A residency application submitted by Alphosus Udoh, a hard-working Nigerian second year BA student who has been in Denmark since he was 15, has never been assessed.

Meanwhile, the clock is ticking.

At best, his lawyer contends this bureaucracy is unfair – and very possibly illegal

son with a good heart, who is willing to work hard for society and does not want anything in return, other than being able to stay and continue his hard work.”

Both Boateng and Fonsner are shocked by the decision to expel Udoh.

Unusual procedure THE PROCEDURE for Udoh’s application has been anything but usual.

Danish immigration law allows applicants to petition for a stay based on strong ties to Denmark and if the expulsion from the country might prove too burdensome for the applicant.

However, there is no specific application form or process for these cases. Instead, applicants are directed to use form SG 1, the application for family reunification, and apply to be ‘reunified’ with themselves, according to Ane Divine Jinor, Udoh’s legal advisor.

This often leads to confusion because family reunification applicants must do so from their home country if they have no legal basis to be in Denmark, according to Michala Bendixen, the chairman of Refugees Welcome, Denmark.

As such, Udoh is also only able to apply on the grounds of his strong ties to Denmark if he submits the application while legally in Denmark before his visa expires.

Bureaucratic red tape UNFORTUNATELY in Udoh’s case, this confusion has significantly hindered his application process.

Months of delays filled with bureaucratic slip-ups followed his application submission in which the Danish Immigration Services said they only received the first page of Udoh’s application – despite Udoh’s receipt of confirmation that they had all 22 pages.

A few weeks later, his application was again rejected on the grounds he needed to pay

Of course in Denmark, it is red and white tape

an application fee. When Jinor pointed out Udoh’s exceptional case did not require an application fee, Immigration Services reopened his case.

His case was again rejected a few weeks later on the grounds that he had to be outside the country during the application process.

This reopening and rejection of Udoh’s case, according to Jinor, is the crux of the issue.

He and Udoh are prepared to accept the Immigration Services’ decision if they fully process his case and refuse it.

Instead, Immigration Services has repeatedly rejected Udoh’s application.

“The reason we think it’s unfair is because they are rejecting the application. Legally and technically, we have to make a clear distinction between what is a rejection and what is a refusal,” explained Jinor.

“A refusal means they have processed the case to the end and they can’t give you a positive answer. If they do this, that is fair.”

Udoh maintains that he believes in the Danish system, but sometimes wonders if there is preferential treatment throughout the application process.

“When you listen to the queen giving her new year speech, she’s always talking about wanting people who give something back to society. If you can do that, you’re welcome,” he said.

“Sometimes I go to the immigration centre and feel bad for the people from third world countries that I see because they’re just treated different

because they don’t understand the language.”

Due process CURRENTLY, Udoh and Jinor are appealing Udoh’s right to submit his application. This process may take up to a year, at which point Udoh may be able to submit his application and appeal to stay in Denmark.

However, Jinor believes Udoh should not have to appeal to submit his application.

This is a right guaranteed by the Aliens Act, the lawyer contends.

“The Aliens Act makes an exception for people who have a strong connection to Denmark to be able to stay in Denmark. So actually what he’s talking about is a legal right recognised by the laws in Denmark,” continued Jinor.

“By going to the media, we are creating this awareness that the Immigration Services is doing something that is unfair and, to me, I might even say illegal. So if this can help the legality to be reinstated, then it will be fine.”

Udoh has always reiterated that he’ll happily abide by the Immigration Services’ decisions, so long as they hear him out based on his legal rights.

“I know I don’t normally come across as emotional to some people – because you can’t cry over spilt milk. You can just work towards making something better,” he said.

“So it means a whole lot for me to stay here. Aside from the colour of my skin and the colour of my passport, I feel Danish inside and outside.”

NEWS

28 June - 15 August 2019

THE EXCAVATION of a large stone near Thisted in northwestern Jutland, which locals believe could become a tourist attraction, is not going as well as planned. Some 170 tonnes in size, Hundborgstenen is the country’s sixth largest stone, but it has been hidden below the surface for over 80 years after being last exposed in 1938. It arrived in Denmark during the last Ice Age.

Pain in the office TWO OUT of three Danes with office jobs suffer from physical pain, according to a HK union survey. The pain is caused by sitting down all day, clicking a mouse and putting pressure on the back, neck and shoulders. In related news, Copenhagen Municipality wants to limit the number of night shifts to four over concerns it is unhealthy for workers.

Historic castle for sale GURREHUS Castle in North Zealand has been put up for sale on boliga.dk for 52 million kroner. Owned by the real estate company Gurrehus, the historic property has undergone a massive renovation to restore it to its former splendour.

This is the third time it has been made available on the market since 2013.

Dam … he’s experienced HENRIK Dam Kristensen, 62, has replaced Pia Kjærsgaard as the speaker of Parliament. Born in Vorbasse in southern Jutland and originally a postman, he has been a Socialdemokratiet MP since 1990, although he did sit as an MEP from 20042007. Kristensen held ministerial posts in both the Poul Nyrup Rasmussen and Helle Thorning-Schmidt governments.

Thousands in poverty AROUND 20,000 children under the age of five were living below the poverty line in Denmark in 2017, according to a report from Arbejderbevægelsens Erhvervsråd.

Most were the product of single-parent families and over half of the children’s mothers were unskilled workers.

Record Folkemødet opening THE OPENING of Folkemødet – or as its founder Bertel Haarder likes to calls it: “the political Roskilde Festival with less beer and more talk” – set a new record as 32,000 guests gathered in the Bornholm town of Allinge to listen to the opening addresses. Heavy rain fell during the four-day festival of debating, drumming up support and drinking.

RIGSPOLITIET has discovered an error in a computer program that used phone data to place suspects at particular locations at specific times. This means the police and the public prosecutor will have to reassess all such evidence in cases dating back to 2012 in case there have been miscarriages of justice. The error was corrected on March 8.

Four-day working week FROM THIS autumn, 300 employees at Odsherred Municipality in northwest Zealand will be able to fulfil their 37-hour working week over four days instead of five, enabling them to have a three-day weekend.

The trial will last three years. The longer working days will enable more members of the public to arrange meetings that do not interrupt their own working hours.

The cost of Paludan THE POLICE have confirmed that the cost of protecting politicians since January 1 now exceeds 100 million kroner, with Rasmus Paludan, the leader of the far-right party Stram Kurs, contributing the most to the overall figure. The police estimate they have spent 78 million kroner on wages and 21 million on special equipment during the period.

The threat of souped-up electric bikes

IPEDELEC FACEBOOK

Stone me

ONLINE THIS WEEK Miscarriage alert

5

Is a menace emerging on our roads that will ultimately increase the number of cyclist fatalities?

STEPHEN GADD

E

LECTRIC bikes accounted for six fatalities on Denmark’s roads in 2018 – around 10 percent of the total figure for cyclists, and a steep climb on previous years, as there were only 15 deaths between 2012 and 2017.

The statistics compiler, Vejdirektorat, is at present engaged in an analysis of electric bikes, which is expected to be published in the autumn.

Pedal to the metal ONE OF the contributing factors could be that a legal 800 kroner kit can tune an electric bike to go 60 km/h.

The accident prevention body Havarikommissionen wants the kits banned, but concedes it might be pointless if they’re easily available online or abroad.

More like a moped AN ELECTRIC bike’s motor should only

More of a danger to the cyclists

assist a cyclist up to a 25 km/h maximum speed. After that, it is up to the cyclist’s own muscle power.

However, pedelecs are permitted to go up to 45 km/h. Unlike normal electric bikes, these have specially strong frames, more powerful brakes and side-mirrors fitted. At the moment, they are permitted in Denmark as an experiment.

Is age a factor?

A 62-YEAR-OLD man was killed on June 14 in a collision between his electric bicycle and a lorry at a roundabout near Årslev in Funen. It is believed he was going at around 30-40 km per hour.

The majority of all the cyclists killed and injured are more than 44 years old and around two-thirds of them are women.

Blue card expiry concerns SOME 1.5 million people risk losing their health insurance cover when travelling outside Scandinavia after 31 December 2019 unless they renew their blue card, according to Udbetaling Danmark. But many have not been so lucky, as their cards have already expired.

Dentist shortage THE COUNTRY will face a shortage of 355 dentists in a decade’s time as not enough are replacing those who are retiring, according to Sundhedsstyrelsen.

Long waiting times are impacting kids in the public sector. The country is also facing a similar problem with its GPs, as one in ten have reached the retirement age. Among dentists, it is one in eight.

Make it harder to run NEW PARTIES running in future general elections in Denmark might need more voter declarations to qualify.

Several veteran politicians – including Bertel Haarder, Mogens Lykketoft and Marianne Jelved – contend the number should be doubled to 40,000. It has become too easy, they argue, for the likes of Klaus Riskær Petersen’s party to take part.

A COMMUNITY OF REAL PEOPLE GROWING IN GOD SUNDAYS TOGETHER SUNDAYS 12:00

LEVENDE KIRKE FEMAGERVEJ 39, HVIDOVRE www.facebook.com/levendekirke www.levendekirke.com

6

NEWS

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

ONLINE THIS WEEK AARHUS University (AU) in co-operation with Lego wants to make the toymaker’s iconic plastic brick more environmentally-friendly. In other research news, exercise can have different effects depending on what time of day you do it (University of Copenhagen), narwhals and white whales are capable of interbreeding (KU), CO2 could be used as a resource in the future (AU), and pigs should be able to grow organs that can be transplanted into humans within a couple of years (AU).

Antibiotic progress THE OVER-PRESCRIPTION of antibiotics is one of the main causes of immunity, and over the last two years a new initiative involving 21 hospitals across Denmark has been attempting to address the problem. One of them, Viborg, has reduced usage by between 25 and 30 percent, while Rigshospital has cut up to 50 percent by looking into the causes of a patient’s infection more thoroughly.

Publisher satisfied

ONLINE THIS WEEK

G

ARDEN owners across the nation are being encouraged to delay their inclination to cut, prune and trim in a bid to help the nation’s bees, which are growing ever scarcer thanks to the heavy usage of pesticides.

The nation’s beehive association Danmarks Biavlerforening emphasises how particularly important flowering hedges are for hungry bees pollinating fruit trees and berry bushes, referring to them as their “pantry”.

Amager is buzzing NEVERTHELESS, a survey carried out alongside Selinevej by the new urban forest in Amager – a project to maintain biodiversity in the capital – has identified 31 different species of bees, of which four are considered rare.

Even rarer are pelicans, but two were spotted over the weekend in Jutland – an occurrence blamed on the movement of warm air from Germany. In total, there have only been around

Let them eat … kale?

Selinevej is buzzing with activity

10 sightings.

The pelicans’ brief appearance followed a star turn by a Baillon’s crake in mid-June in Birkerød.

The last time one was spotted was in 2015.

The ‘tidal butterfly’ is also invading Denmark, but in slightly larger numbers. Some 4,000 have been encountered on the tiny island of Ertholmene, just north of Bornholm.

Sod off COPENHAGEN isn’t the only municipality trying to boost biodiversity. In Rudersdal roadside grass is being ripped up and being replaced with nutrient-poor soil, as grass and nettles tend to thrive in nutrient-rich soil, making it

difficult for anything else to grow.

Herbs and flowers will be planted in the areas, which will hopefully attract more insects.

It is hoped that local citizens will be patient with the rather barren look – the first herbs are expected to appear next spring.

In other nature news, a woman recently fought off a swooping buzzard in Albertslund Forest – possibly a bird with hatchlings that perceived the woman as a threat.

In the event of an attack, the public are advised to make as much noise as possible whilst fanning their arms wide. Any sustained cuts or scratches should be checked by a doctor as the birds can carry infectious bacteria.

Vexing vaxing beliefs

Trusting in science PIXABAY

A COLLEGE and an employers association have both indicated they will soon start offering cannabis farming courses for both skilled and unskilled workers.

Despite 30 companies receiving authorisation to grow the drug for medicinal use, there are concerns the burgeoning industry lacks the expertise to grow a pharmaceutically sound product.

EDWARD OWEN

PIXABAY

High hopes for courses

Beehive association appeals to garden owners to leave their hedgerows alone

FACEBOOK/INGER STØJBERG

DANISH publisher Gyldendal has concluded that the cry-it-out method advocated by the Spanish book ‘Godnat og sov godt’ (goodnight and sleep well) is not harmful to babies, thus rejecting the claims of a Facebook protest group that wants the book banned. In related news, Done

by Deer has recalled a batch of its ‘happy dots’ baby plates from the market due to a high presence of melamine.

Bee good and trim your plans KØBENHAVNS KOMMUNE

Eco Lego bricks

28 June - 15 August 2019

Inger the ex minister

Time to give them more needle?

A nation of lightbulb moments

THE IMMIGRATION minister, Inger Støjberg, probably thought she was being quintessentially Danish when she uploaded a picture of herself in 2017 with a cake celebrating the passing of 50 laws that make it more difficult for foreigners to enter Denmark. But actually, aside from the controversy it sparked, the image is apparently something fewer Danes can relate to, as they have been eating less cake over the past 15 years. (CW)

THE THEORIES of anti-vaxers and other internet sceptics seem to be gaining ground, if a study encompassing 140,000 people from over 140 countries carried out by the Wellcome Trust is to be believed. The study reveals that 79 percent of people worldwide believe that vaccines are safe, but in Denmark the figure is only 69 percent. Generally speaking, 21 percent of the world’s population do not believe vaccines are safe to use. (SG)

ACCORDING to the 2018 Wellcome Global Monitor report, few countries compare to Denmark when it comes to having confidence in science and the benefits of research. The report found that 75 percent of Danes were categorised as being science ‘enthusiasts’ – second-placed Finland and Iceland were some distance behind with 61 percent. The report also found that 78 percent were most likely to believe that science benefits ‘most’ people in their country. (CW)

READ THE REST OF THESE STORIES AT CPHPOST.DK

Parkinson’s breakthrough RESEARCHERS from Aarhus University have discovered that during the onset of Parkinson’s disease a certain part of the brain, the caudate nucleus, is broken down. When this happens a person’s cognitive powers are weakened quicker, and many are hit by depression and have problems walking. The discovery should enable quicker identification of ‘at risk’ patients.

Robots reduce pesticides SINCE April, organic sugar beet farmers have been using 12 small robots on their fields as part of a Danish research project to test the feasibility of being able to reduce pesticide usage by up to 80 percent. In other farming news, wheat fields are currently under attack from the wheat yellow rust fungus – the worst case in 35 years – and academics have called on the EU to approve more genetically modified crops. So far it has only green-lighted one.

3D print lag DANISH companies are losing out because of false assumptions about 3D metal printing, Denmark’s Teknologisk Institut warns. Only 3 percent of Danish manufacturing companies have taken to using the 3D metal printing technology, whereas companies abroad are having no such scruples and experiencing rapid growth. Most Danish companies cite price, poor quality and limited access.

Citrus fruit concerns A THIRD of all citrus fruits sold at Danish supermarkets contain the banned pesticide chlorpyrifos, according to Danwatch.

Chlorpyrifos, which attacks the nervous system, has been linked to affecting the brains of foetuses and infants. In related news, a new plant in Herning uses special bacteria to eat up pesticide residues from rivers and lakes in an environmentally-friendly way.

SPORT & CULTURE

28 June - 15 August 2019

Well it’s high time

ONLINE THIS WEEK Handball group of death

HIGH JUMPER Janick Klausen leapt to a new Danish record of 2.28 metres on June 20, beating Michael Mikkelsen’s 28-yearold record by a centimetre. In related news, Anna-Emilie Møller set a Danish record in the 3,000-metre steeplechase at the Diamond League competition in Oslo on June 13, where she finished ninth. Her time of 9 minutes 24.21 seconds means she will represent Denmark at the 2020 Olympics in Tokyo.

Danes on the oche ATTENDANCES at the Danish Darts Open at Brøndby Stadion over the weekend of June 15-16 confirmed the growing popularity of the sport. Around 15,000 tickets were sold, while Danish Darts Union membership numbers have doubled to over 3,000 in the last decade. In related news, Brøndby is introducing facial recognition technology at its stadium to ensure banned individuals cannot attend matches.

No Superliga Saturdays

DENMARK’S women have received a tough draw for the Handball World Championship later this year. Their group includes champions France along with South Korea and Brazil. Denmark are sixth favourites to win the tournament, which starts in Japan on November 30.

Dane wins Junior French Open HOLGER Rune, 16, won the Junior French Open on June 8, beating Toby Kodat 6-3, 6-7, 6-0. He is now the world number two and the first Danish male to win a junior grand slam title since 1999, when Kristian Pless won the Australian Open.

Mads to play drunk teacher MADS MIKKELSEN has been cast in a Danish-language film – Thomas Vinterberg’s upcoming ‘Druk’ – in which he will play an alcoholic gymnasium teacher.

However, filming was delayed following the tragic death of Vinterberg’s 19-year-old daughter in a traffic accident in early May.

THE SUPERLIGA has confirmed there will be no Saturday matches this season, with the majority taking place on Sundays, along with additional fixtures on Fridays and Mondays. The league wants to boost attendances, as it believes many fans are divided between going to Saturday games and watching foreign football on television.

Karrusel’s next stop

Nordic Noir author a Brit

All female stage crew

CHRIS Paton, an English expat, has seen sales of his Nordic Noir books soar since he changed his nom de plume to Christoffer Petersen. The former teacher, who sometimes uses Danglish to give the impression he is Danish, has sold 25,000 books since releasing his debut novel in January 2017 – the first of many. He makes the same income as a part-time teacher.

THE FIRST ever all-female Danish stage crew took charge of the stage at the Spot music festival from May 2-4 in Aarhus.

Out of the 700 sound engineers working in Denmark, only ten are female, so the group had to recruit some from abroad.

Trailblazer in strange booze A US CHEF, who is based in Copenhagen and is the former head of the Nordic Food Lab, has made the 10-person shortlist for the prestigious Basque Culinary World Prize. At Empirical Spirits, Lars Williams is a trailblazer in making alcoholic beverages with strange tastes – such as chicken skin and fir trees.

Top shape for Tour de France JAKOB Fuglsang eased to an overall victory in the Critérium du Dauphiné on June 16 – his second victory in the race. He is the third favourite to win the Tour de France, which starts on July 6.

THE ORGANISERS of Distortion have confirmed they will be relocating their popular Odense festival Karrusel to the capital this August. With a focus on house and techno music, there will be room for 2,500 guests at the two-stage site on Refshaleøen from August 30-31.

DR’s new app DR IS CURRENTLY trialing the new version of its streaming service DRTV ahead of an official launch in the autumn.

Viewers have until July 17 to select the new app, or otherwise they will have to wait.

Stardom beckons DANISH actress Clara Rugaard is on the verge of becoming a household name after co-starring with Hilary Swank in an acclaimed new Netflix film ‘I Am Mother’, which was released last week.

Rapper crashes out of Roskilde CHANCE the Rapper has pulled out of this year’s Roskilde Festival. Wu-Tang Clan have been signed up to fill the void.

7

Hard on Hareide as successor is named Former FCN boss Kasper Hjulmand, who guided FCN to the 2012 Superliga title, will coach the national team from July 2020 onwards CHRISTIAN WENANDE

T

HE DBU football association appointed Kasper Hjulmand, who guided FCN to the 2012 Superliga title, as the new Danish national coach from July 2020 – just 48 hours after the incumbent, Åge Hareide, oversaw a 5-1 demolition of Georgia.

Hareide and his assistant Jon Dahl Tomasson have guided Denmark through 28 consecutive matches without a defeat in 90 minutes, and both were said to be miffed by the timing.

Hjulmand, 47, has recruited Morten Wieghorst to be his assistant – a reversal of roles at FCN. Hareide, who is Norwegian, had a contract that was due to expire on 12 July 2020.

Under-21s misery THE DEFEAT of Georgia followed a disappointing 1-1 draw against Ireland half

a week earlier, but their sadness could not compare with how the under-21s felt after being eliminated from the 2019 Euros in Italy on Sunday – a result that means they won’t be at the 2020 Olympics.

The Danes needed to beat Serbia by at least three goals to overtake the hosts as the best second-placed team, and at 2-0 looked likely to do so.

But when they scored a VAR-approved goal on the hour mark, the Belarussian referee had to disallow it because he had already blown his whistle.

In the end, though, Italy didn’t make it either!

Ofelia Plads fanzone IN RELATED news, a fanzone will be created at Ofelia Plads in Copenhagen for Euro 2020 from June 12 until July 12.

Expecting to see more than 10,000 guests every day, the area will have a supply of food, concerts, events and football on outdoor screens.

Four games will take place at Parken – three group games and a round of 16 stage match – on June 13, 18, 22 and 29.

JAZZ SERVICE IN ENGLISH in the heart of Vesterbro

JUly 28. / August 18. / Aug. 25. at 1 pm

Experience a contemporary jazz service in a Lutheran church.

Join us for tea & coffee after the service.

All denominations are welcome. www.eliaskirken.dk . facebook.com/eliaskirken.dk Eliaskirken

8

BUSINESS

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

ONLINE THIS WEEK GF FORSIKRING has launched a drought insurance that can be bought as a supplement to a house or summerhouse insurance policy.

The premium is 100 kroner per year but there is also a deductible on the first 20,000 kroner’s worth of damage. After that, and assuming various conditions are met, the policy will pay up to 150,000 kroner to repair damage.

Bank implicated again DANSKE Bank is embroiled in another money laundering scandal – this time to the tune of 169 million kroner over seven months involving a Danish money exchange company and the global cash handling firm Loomis. In related news, another group of foreign shareholders is suing the bank for losses incurred by the Estonian scandal – for 750 million kroner.

JYSK founder gravely ill

The Faroes will play a major role in keeping Britain supplied with its national dish should it crash out of the EU STEPHEN GADD

I

N THE INCREASINGLY surreal circus that is Brexit, things change almost from day to day and nobody seems to know what is going on.

Are we in, are we out and if so – when?

So it may come as a surprise that the UK has not been completely idle when it comes to planning for a potential post-Brexit trade Armageddon.

A fishy business AT THE end of January, the UK trade policy minister, George Hollingbery, signed a trade continuity agreement with the Faroe Islands that will see British businesses and consumers benefiting from continued trade with the Faroe Islands after Brexit – whenever that might be.

Apparently, the UK imports almost 200 million pounds’ worth of fish and crustaceans

Cup continues to deliver

Total cuts 200 jobs FRENCH energy giant Total is laying off 200 workers along with some external consultants at its Esbjerg branch, but confirmed no redundancies will be made in Copenhagen, where it employs 360 people.

from the Faroes and the agreement will allow imports to continue tariff-free and enable businesses to trade as freely as they do now.

As an EU member, the UK is automatically part of about 40 trade agreements that the EU has with more than 70 countries. If it leaves the EU without a deal, these deals would immediately be lost.

In good company ...

THE NEW UK-Faroe Islands agreement replicates the existing

trading arrangements as far as possible. It will come into effect as soon as the implementation period ends in January 2021, or in October if the UK leaves the EU without a deal.

This takes the number of so-called continuity deals to ten. The others signed up until now are with the Andean countries, Norway and Iceland, the Caribbean countries, the Pacific Islands, Israel, the Palestinian Authority, Switzerland, Eastern and Southern Africa, and Chile.

No mountains in DK

Thriving in the US PIXABAY

THE HIGH Court has increased the prison sentence of Lars Møller, the former head of Dynamic Oil Trading, from six months to five years. Under Møller’s supervision, the Singapore-based OW Bunker subsidiary lost 645 million kroner through oil speculation and unwise lending. OW Bunker went bankrupt in November 2014 as a result.

“You’re only serving pilot whale and chips?”

UNSPLASH.COM

Sentence increased

AROUND 700 employees at SAS have reportedly signed a letter complaining about the ‘management by fear’ leadership style of the company. In related news, the airline has confirmed it will introduce the upcoming Airbus A350 on its Copenhagen-Chicago route from 28 January 2020, with a view to using the giant planes on seven more routes.

Arla targeting food waste

CREATIVE BUSINESS CUP

LARS LARSEN, the founder of the retail chain JYSK, has been diagnosed with liver cancer and resigned as chair. His son, Jacob Brunsborg, has taken over. In related news, Hans Frede Fleggaard, the grocery shop owner who became a multi-millionaire with 17 stores on the back of Danes flocking to Germany to buy cheap goods, has died at the age of 85.

Post-Brexit fish ‘n’ chips sorted

Management by fear

ERIK CHRISTENSEN

Drought insurance offer

28 June - 15 August 2019

A madly popular event

Flat by nature

Colour it in red and white

ON JULY 1, the best creative startups from over 60 countries – including China, Philippines, Thailand, India, Ukraine, Costa Rica, Australia and Nigeria – will compete with each other at the 2019 Creative Business Cup Global Finals in Copenhagen.

The annually-held championship is an opportunity for entrepreneurs to connect with investors, venture capitalists, crowdfunding platforms, business pioneers and industry experts from all over the world. The event will be held from July 1-2 at the Bella Center. (Arushi Rajput)

ONE OF the most intriguing things in Denmark is that it is very hard for a new employee to identify who their new boss is simply by observing their actions. For example, they might observe a lot of arguments taking place over an extended period of time and ask: “Is there anyone here who is going to take some control?” One expat once asked a Dane why there are no mountains in Denmark. “We don’t have any,” the Dane replied with a smile and continued: “Because we have a flat structure at work and in nature.” (Jinu Jayapalan)

A REPORT released by Dansk Industri and the Danish embassy in Washington DC reveals US-based Danish companies are creating investment opportunities across America, as well as 123,000 jobs primarily in the areas of medicine, health, food, energy and the environment. The report has monitored all Danish business activities in the US, and the findings indicate a rather positive future for Denmark in the US — and the world. (Arushi Rajput)

READ THE REST OF THESE STORIES AT CPHPOST.DK

ARLA IS adding the words ‘often good after’ alongside the expiration date on a wide selection of its milk cartons in order to encourage consumers to apply common sense and assess if the milk is safe before they discard it. In related news, FC Copenhagen and a number of other interest parties are seeking a sustainable alternative to the disposable plastic cups used at Parken.

More data centre upheaval THOMAS Anderson, the mayor of Aabenraa, is disappointed that Apple has decided against building a data centre in the South Jutland town and will now concentrate its efforts on Viborg. In related news, Facebook, which similarly cancelled plans to build a centre in Esbjerg, has confirmed that a British contractor died whilst working at the site of its new centre in Odense on May 20.

Manufacturing growth THERE was 0.5 percent growth in the Danish manufacturing sector between March and April, according to Danmarks Statistik.

Manufacturing generates around 16 percent of the country’s jobs and 18 percent of the total value creation. Dansk Industri chief economist Morten Granzau claims the growth is an indicator of a booming economy.

Best 7-Elevens in world A 7-ELEVEN franchisee in Denmark, which is under the management of Reitan Convenience Denmark, has been named the ‘World’s best convenience concept’ by the National Association of Convenience Stores. It is generally regarded as a model for 7-Elevens across the world.

28 June - 15 August 2019

ECONOMICS EXPLAINED Martina Facino works for a leading consultancy firm where she specialises in competition economics and maintains a strong interest in macroeconomics. Using her master’s in economics and finance, she intends to focus on explaining macroeconomic concepts and describing them in the current context

H

OW MUCH ice-cream do you buy over the summer given that it costs one euro per scoop? And how much would you buy if the price increased to 1.20 euros per scoop?

to 1.20 euros per scoop and you buy 10 scoops less, then your demand is elastic. The price increased by one-fifth and you cut your shopping by more than one-fifth – in fact by one-half.

Two scoops or one?

THE ELASTICITY of demand measures exactly this: how does the quantity demanded by consumers change in relation to changes in prices. In other words, how much can the seller ‘stretch’ prices (like an elastic band – hence the name) before consumers start buying a different amount, and how much will that amount vary?

Demand is elastic if the quantity demanded by consumers, who are given a price change, varies more than that change in price.

Imagine over the summer if you buy a total of 20 scoops of ice-cream for one euro each. If the price of ice-cream increases

Luxury world problem DEMAND is usually elastic for goods that do not fulfil basic needs and that we can live without – precisely like ice-cream.

Demand is inelastic if the quantity demanded by consumers given a price change varies less than the price change. In the example above, your demand would be inelastic if you were buying 20 scoops also at 1.20 euros.

Demand is usually inelastic for primary needs such as medicines, which sometimes we need no matter the price.

Useful for businesses THE ELASTICITY of demand is not constant for a given good or

9

PIXABAY

MARTINA FACINO

BUSINESS OPINION

Choose your prices carefully, Scoopy!

consumer, but varies depending on the current price level, quantity demanded, and the price change applied. You might still buy 20 scoops at 1.20 euros, but you might decrease your icecream consumption if the price increased to 1.50 euros per scoop.

Why is the elasticity use-

ful? The elasticity of demand provides a lot of information regarding consumers’ buying behaviours in relation to a good. This is useful to companies, as they can predict their customers’ behaviour when changing prices and set optimal prices for their goods.

8

OPINION

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

28 June - 15 August 2019

Thank you Rasmus Paludan!

I

D

EAR RASMUS Paludan!

Thank you for your great efforts for Muslims living in Denmark.

Contribution to society BECAUSE of you, we, who are very many, have had time to reflect on the contribution that our very good Muslim friends make to Danish society. They work hard, play a big role in educating their children and pay their taxes like everyone else.

You might have seen how many so-called ‘White Danes’ formed a protective ring around our Muslim friends when you wanted to ruin their Iftar dinner at City Hall (unfortunately I wasn’t there myself ), and we will continue to protect everyone from racism in this country.

Understanding Ramadan ALSO, thank you for focusing so much on Ramadan. Now many more people understand what Ramadan is: that it can be difficult neither eating nor

drinking for what can be 18 hours a day in a country like Denmark with short nights; how it is humbling to endure the suffering of the poor who cannot afford food; and how it invests community spirit as people share their food with one another, give praise, purge their bodies and much, much more.

In fact, you have done enormous good for the Muslims in Denmark.

More noticed THANKS to you, I visit my hairdresser Hussein more regularly than before, and I notice more than before the efforts of my good Muslim neighbours, like the father who runs a kiosk and drives a taxi to support his family whilst providing for his children’s education.

The list is endless: my greengrocer, the bus driver, my regular taxi driver, talented researchers at Novo Nordisk, talented IT people at Mærsk, but not least Hussein who is so kind to my niece’s disabled son Oliver.

I salute all the many, many other sweet, talented and diligent Muslims we have in Denmark.

Year of Tolerance THE UNITED Arab Emirates has named 2019 a ‘Year of Tolerance’, so let us in Denmark follow this wave and be tolerant of other cultures and religious beliefs. Those who want to be a part of Denmark and give to society are welcome.

I have been sitting in many meetings with Muslims over the past month and been embarrassed to be a ‘White Dane’. But today I am proud to be a ‘White Dane’ because we showed yesterday in the election that we are absolutely not racists.

Eid Mubarak to all my Muslim friends! (HH)

A Dane Abroad

Do and you know what to do if Born raised in Denmark and a resident of New Zealand for over 14 years, Kirsten has lived a pretty you find yourself with nomadic life since her early 20s. A caught physiotherapist, yoga teacher and keen home cook, she is passionate your hair in the postbox? about food, good living and natural health.

Follow her on Instagram @kirstenlouiseyoga

E

VERY CULTURE has got peculiar sayings and ‘insider terms’, but often we are completely blind to their incoherence, until someone makes an attempt to translate them.

I have gathered here a few idiomatic gems from both Danish and English culture, and most of them are unintentionally dirty! But let’s face the truth: it has always been more fun inventing dirty sayings, and unsurprisingly they tend to be the ones that we remember.

STUDIESKOLEN

T’S NOT every day you go online and discover that your CEO has created a viral storm!

On June 6, one day after the Danish General Election, Hans Hermansen took to Facebook and LinkedIn to express his opinion about the actions of Rasmus Paludan, the Koran-burning leader of the far right party Stram Kurs, who failed to win election.

On a good day on Facebook, our posts might be shared 50 to 100 times, but Hans’ opinion was shared 455 times, attracting 486 comments and over 5,000 likes. Additionally on LinkedIn, it generated 12,059 likes and 420 comments.

Here is his opinion again, printed in full.

KIRSTEN LOUISE PEDERSEN

Faecal fascination BOTH THE Danes and the English appear equally enamoured by poo-related expressions “You’re an absolute ninny” when things go belly up. Or Dane would put a dot over the should I say go ‘tits up’? An glas vand’).

Take a Danish course at Studieskolen and find out ‘I’ (‘at sætte prikken over ‘i’et’).

But wait, there’s more!

If you English speaker may be ‘up shit Studieskolen’s courses are designed for everyone who wants to make fast creek without a paddle’, or shit are really upset with someone you If something has become progress with their Danish language skills. For beginners, the pros and everyone in can ‘hit the fan’. between. Come to classmay wish for their arse to itch too much for a Dane we use the up to four times a week in the heart of Copenhagen and you’ll In Danish, a situation can be inand their(asarms to Read be more too about short metaphor of water: the drop that no longer be treading the spinach they say). the origin of different Danish expressions howrøv to use themog at studieskolen.dk. ‘lort og lagkage’, literally mean(‘Måand din klø dine arme made the cup overflow (‘dråben ing shit and layer cake, which is, være for korte’). And if things der fik bægret til at flyde over’), well, clearly not a good combi- have gone pear-shaped, the Devil while in English they refer to nation. And if someone is being might be loose in salmon street camels: ‘the straw that broke the Follow us /studieskolen really hopeless, you might say (‘fanden er løs i lakse gade’)! camel’s back’. With an obvious that they can’t poke a stick in a lack of camels in Britain, pershit without ruining both the Cup, crossed lines, camels haps this is a leftover from the stick and the shit (‘pære i en lort IN BOTH Danish and Eng- colonial days? uden at ødelægge begge dele’). lish, if we go too far, we agree that we ‘cross the line’ (‘går over Clean getaway stregen’).

IF NOTHING is an issue in Dirty Danes When referring to the act of Denmark, you might say that THE DANES have various sayings that are downright devoid repeating things that we have there is no cow on the ice (‘der of any logical sense whatsoever. already done, the Danes like to er ingen ko på isen’). Well I If you are in trouble you may talk about plates (‘opfinde den suppose that could be an issue. have your hair stuck in the mail dybe tallerken’), and the English And of course, many Danish box (‘håret i postkassen’). If you like to talk about wheels (‘rein- sayings involve bikes! If someone are barely hanging in there, you venting the wheel’). is a bit simple, you might say may be hanging out with your If you are weeping in Eng- that their bike is short of one arse on the surface of the water lish you may ‘ball your eyes out’, gear (‘Han mangler et gear på (‘røven i vandskorpen’). And while in Danish you cry snot cyklen’). if you are really busy you may (‘græder snot’).

And thus, I’ve managed to be racing around like a singed If an Englishman does close with the cleanest of the fart in a glass of water (‘drøner something extremely carefully, sayings for a tidy end to this rundt som en skoldet skid i et he might ‘cross his Ts’, while a rundown of idiomatic nonsense.

OPINION

28 June - 15 August 2019

NEXT ISSUE

ZACH KHADUDU

Mackindergarten

Straight Up

ADRIAN MACKINDER

Zach Khadudu is a Kenyan by birth and a journalist by choice. He is a commentator and an activist with a passion for refugee and human rights. He may share a heritage with a certain US president, but his heart lies elsewhere – in the written and spoken word.

AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL

record of siding with the hardliners. Eminent participation in the elections by groups that have for so long remained on the margins of political discourse is.

Can Socialdemokratiet make its mark at Sjælsmark?

T

HE POLITICAL dust has settled. The campaign posters are no longer on the street corners. The annoying political advertisements aren’t on YouTube anymore. It is back to business as usual … almost.

Mobilised to vote IN RETROSPECT, this election was a battle of the titans.

It provided a glimmer of hope in the increased participation in the electoral process by new Danes with a non-native ethnic background.

In previous elections new Danes and Danes who are Muslims were accused of being bystanders in the democratic processes. They were accused of not voting and not engaging in the political sphere.

This time around these groups mobilised. Their community leaders made YouTube and Facebook videos. They held community meetings, arranged debates and wrote press pieces.

They rallied their communities in every way.

It paid off. Scores of non-ethnic Danes turned up at voting

centres – and vote they did. Unsurprisingly, the rightists blamed the gains of the left – particularly the stellar performance of Radikale – on the high turnout of these fringe groups.

It was a reminder that new Danes take the blame either way: condemned when they refrain and condemned when they participate. They can never do right.

Media missed the story IN THE midst of populist winds across the Western Hemisphere, the win by the red bloc led by a media-savvy young politician, 41-year-old Mette Frederiksen, who looks set to become the youngest Danish prime minister ever, grabbed international media attention.

From Bloomberg and BBC to Aljazeera and South China Morning Post – this fact was the headline grabber, not the improved positive engagement by minority groups.

The ascension to power by the left is not necessarily a glimmer of hope – especially in the area of immigration when you consider their recent track

9

The arc that shattered SO FAR, refugee children languishing in deportation camps, young migrants deprived of chances for better integration and Muslim communities disparaged by emboldened extremists wait and watch for what policies the new government will enact.

Martin Luther King Jr spoke of the long arc of the moral universe that bends towards justice.

These last four years have been a horrendous nightmare that shattered that arc. Families have been split apart. The hopes of children at Sjælsmark and other camps have evaporated. Many have already been deported back to very unstable countries, such as Somalia and Afghanistan.

Many others are still rotting in limbo at refugee centres across the country. The left has a chance to redeem the values for which this country used to take pride in and showcase to the world.

The new prime minister has a chance to rewrite history in their favour: to right the wrongs done to many vulnerable groups in this land, and to stand as a beacon of hope that dispels the dark despair brought about by growing isolationists, demagogues and ‘strong-men’.

It takes time, resources and tough will. It’s a noble chance for the new government to start re-bending that long arc of the moral universe towards justice for all – native and alien alike.

Godspeed!

Straight, No Chaser STEPHEN GADD

An Actor’s Life

IN 2 ISSUES

IAN BURNS

Living Faith REVD SMITHA PRASADAM IN 3 ISSUES

The Road Less Taken JESSICA ALEXANDER

Mishra’s Mishmash MRUTYUANJAI MISHRA IN 4 ISSUES

Crazier than Christmas VIVIENNE MCKEE

Early Rejser ADAM WELLS

Join the chat WWW.CPHPOST.DK WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/COPENHAGENPOST WWW.INSTAGRAM.COM/CPHPOST WWW.TWITTER.COM/CPHPOST

12 COMMUNITY

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

ABOUT TOWN

28 June - 15 August 2019

PHOTOS BY HASSE FERROLD

Hungarian ambassador Kristof Altusz (centre left) oversaw a tribute to one of his country’s greatest ever poets, Júlia Szendrey, on June 24. A statue of her likeness was unveiled outside the Hungarian Embassy at Strandvejen 170 in Charlottenlund. Szendrey was the first Hungarian to translate HC Andersen’s tales into her native language

The Danish Justice Foundation were the guests of French ambassador Caroline Ferrari (left) as they held a charity dinner on May 2. Among those in attendance were Capital Region head Sophie Hæstorp Andersen (centre left) and Tommy Ahlers (centre right), the outgoing education and research minister. The beneficiaries of the evening were primarily victims of human rights violations from South East Asia

Swedish ambassador Frederik Jörgensen (centre right) presided over his country’s national day celebrations at Gustafskyrkan (Swedish Gustaf’s Church) on Folke Bernadottes Allé in Østerbro on June 6

The diplomatic corps turned out in force for the AGM of KUKS at Kastellet on May 22, where the organisation’s president Kaj Larssen addressed those present

Slovenian ambassador Edvin Skrt was a guest speaker at ‘Why Bees Matter?’ (see page 6), an event co-hosted by the European Environment Agency on May 13 ahead of World Bee Day

The Argentina Embassy were the hosts of a Malbec World Day event at the official residence of ambassador Conrado Solari (right) on May 9

28 June - 15 August 2019

COMMUNITY

13

Rane Willerslev (right), the head of the National Museum, was one of the many thousands of Danes out celebrating Skt Hans Aften on Sunday with bonfires and singing. Willerslev was overseeing proceedings at ‘Smag på Dragør’, which included performances by Savage Rose singer Annisette Koppel and the Camerata chamber choir. In fact, you might have seen some of it on television

Prinsesse Esmeralda of Belgium (centre) was the distinguished guest at the presentation of the Womenomics Award at Tivolis Koncertsal on May 21, where she was joined on stage by event organiser Tine Arentsen Willumsen from Above and Beyond (left) and Belgian ambassador Leo Peeters (right)

Luxembourg’s ambassador Janine Finck (centre right) hosted a reception at her residence in Klampenborg to mark the birthday of the grand duke. Among her guests was Cuban ambassador Yiliam Sardinas (right)

Mexican ambassador Carlos Pujalte (centre right) was among those present at the Mexican Culture Festival at Blågårds Plads in Copenhagen on June 8, which included a special performance by Cana Dulce (also pictured)

Nepalese ambassador Yuba Nath Lamsal was the host of some cultural performances on Strøget to mark his country’s Republic Day and Everest Day on May 29

Indian ambassador Ajit Gupte (centre right) and his wife were among the guests at a special concert given by the Kanchana Sisters on May 29 at Kulturhuset Pilegården in Brønshøj

12 COMMUNITY

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

28 June - 15 August 2019

An American almanac: tasty snacks, rockabilly beat-tracks and black Cadillacs PHOTOS: HASSE FERROLD

WORDS: BEN HAMILTON

As far as national day gatherings in Copenhagen go, they don’t get much bigger than the US Embassy’s at Rydhave, and on June 20 the Americans were once again laying on the style in a fashion few nations can compete with. The guest of honour was this beautiful car. Cue music: “I don’t need no driver’s licence, I’m too reckless to survive. It’s like a carburetor instigator (feels all right, feels all right) drivin’ in a slick black Cadillac.”

The hundreds who took to Rydhave’s lawns were in no hurry to leave given the wealth of food, culture and activities

US ambassador Carla Sands took to the stand to address those present. Among them were a great many diginaties, including (left to right) Japanese ambassador Toshiro Suzuki, South African ambassador Zindzi Mandela, the outgoing finance minister, Kristian Jensen, and Hans Hermansen, the CEO of CPH POST

Let there be marching, music and manna from heaven – courtesy of the Marines, JC Hawkins And His Model A Playboys, and the Crown Plaza

COMMUNITY

28 June - 15 August 2019

15

Asana on the grass: Fælleparken a splendid venue for International Yoga Day PHOTOS: HANS HERMANSEN

WORDS: BEN HAMILTON

The stage was set, or rather the mats were unrolled, for International Yoga Day in Fælleparken on Sunday June 16. The event was organised by the Indian Embassy with help from Brahma Kumaris, Amrita Yoga, The Art of Living, Astanga Yoga Copenhagen and Dansk Yoga Sportsforbund, so it was appropriate that the country’s ambassador Ajit Gupte said a few words to those present

The secret behind yoga, so we’ve been told, is to keep the studio really warm, and June 16 was a wonderfully sunny day

The yoga practitioners weren’t therefore the only Copenhageners making use of the park, but they were the most stylish

Among those in attendance were Indian ambassador Ajit Gupte and Hans Hermansen, the CEO of CPH POST ...

and Divya Gauba, the CEO of Air India Denmark, along with the rest of her team, and UAE ambassador Fatema Almazrouei ... Trine Zafina Søndergaard, one of the country’s top yoga practitioners

16 HISTORY

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

28 June - 15 August 2019

Back when the world’s most liveable city was a prison toilet

ARUSHI RAJPUT

C

OPENHAGEN is often ranked as being the world’s most liveable city. In 2018, a report released by ECA International revealed that the city provides its residents with excellent amenities: efficient transport systems, healthcare facilities and outstanding infrastructure.

Furthermore, Denmark is a regular on the United Nations Happiness Index published since 2012, which it has topped several times, never once falling out of the top five.

But 200 years ago, the Danish capital was nowhere near as happy, healthy and liveable as it is today. Indeed, Copenhagen’s recent history serves as an example of how a city can undergo drastic change and help the rest of the world tackle issues of air pollution and urban space.

Copenhagen’s journey becoming a model city inspiring other cities to be ‘Copenhagenised’ (yes, it’s an actual term) has been long and noteworthy. Let’s step back to understand how the Danish capital used to be and how far it has really come.

Old city limits LIKE MOST European cities, Copenhagen in the early 19th century was fortified and the city centre was dotted with heaps of soil and earthworks to help defend the city from foreign invasions.

In those days Copenhagen had only four gates: Vesterport, Nørreport, Østerport and Amagerport. Everything that lay beyond these points was considered as being ‘out of town’, including the present-day Tivoli amusement park and the central railway station.

To get a better idea of how

far the old Copenhagen extended, the location of the four gates needs to be visualised. Three of them stood in the areas where today’s train stations of the same names are located, while the fourth one, Amagerport, was to the south of the present-day city centre, where the district of Christianshavn crosses over onto the island of Amager.

King Christian IV of Denmark was a man of foresight. He knew Copenhagen would grow. In his reign, these painfully constricted city boundaries were significantly enlarged to include a large mass of land in the north of the city.

For the next 200 years, this annex alleviated many of Copenhagen’s growing pains.

Population growth

BY THE end of the 19th century, the city had nearly 120,000 residents living in a very small area of land. People were forced to live in cramped quarters, with the ever-present threat of fire always looming. As part of the measures to keep the kingdom safe, the king allowed no buildings outside of the fortifications.

However, as the population grew exponentially the city allowed construction made of wood to make it easier to knock down at the first sign of threat.

There were also some less congested farm villages in the northwestern part of the city that appealed to those who desired a more stable lifestyle. Nicknamed ‘the Lakes’, the area consisted of a row of what are now three rectangular lakes – Sankt Jorgens Sø, Peblinge Sø and Sortedams Sø – which today are among Copenhagen’s top attractions.

Much of this area is split between the residential neighbourhoods of Frederiksberg, Nørrebro and Østerbro and sought after by city dwellers because of the tranquil ambience and tree-lined boulevards. It is difficult to imagine its past as the site of one of the city’s poorest neighbourhoods.

Cramped city SPACE was becoming an intolerable problem in the overpopulated city of Copenhagen and the rigid line of fortifications left no scope for expansion in the territory.

In 1802, in a rather misguided attempt to tackle this growing problem, the mayor passed a law giving a tax break to landlords renting apartments less than 64 sqm in size. The idea was to give owners an incentive to divide the apartment so more families could be accommodated. This backfired when the landlords starting sanctioning extremely small apartments (28 sqm) to maximise profits. As a result, tenements originally designed for no more than 20 inhabitants now housed hundreds.

Living in a toilet RESIDENTS of Copenhagen will be surprised to know that the fashionably located and spacious apartments they live in today were once four of five separate quarters in slum neighbourhoods.

Frederiksberg, Rosenørns Allé and Frederiksstaden were once home to the destitute and decrepit members of society who lived out their lives crammed into quarters with little sunlight, no plumbing and no facilities.

The plight of the city can be seen by the names given to its quarters – the Puddle, the Louse Club, the Crashing Hut, the Water Closet and the Poor Man’s Cavern – which connoted the conditions under which the poor residents lived.

In many buildings, residents had to climb rickety wooden ladders to reach their homes. But it was the basement dwellers who suffered the most. Their homes had ditches dug in the floors to contain the rain overflow, which amounted to at least six cm of water, street sewage and mud all through the spring and autumn.

It’s no surprise that cholera, tetanus and diphtheria were rampant.

The city’s middle class – shopkeepers, merchants, civil servants and artisans – lived un-

CPH CITY ARCHIVES

Copenhagen hasn’t always been so splendid to live in. Just two centuries ago, many of its residents lived in squalor and woe betide anyone caught outside the city’s gates after midnight

It’s fair to say old Copenhagen used to whiff a bit

der different and relatively better conditions. They could own an entire apartment or house usually above their family business, and they even had servants’ quarters.

However, these houses were also often cramped, allowing only a shaft of light to enter. The houses in and around the walking street Strøget are remnants of these.

Then there were the rich and aristocratic classes, who lived in large houses in and around Amalienborg Palace. These apartments were characterised by many rooms, fine interiors, spaciousness, dining areas, parlours and luxuries. You can see these aristocratic homes – which are often now offices and institutions – on the streets of Amaliegade and Bredgade as well as at the great yard at Saint Anne’s Square.

Economic downfall OVERPOPULATION wasn’t the only problem the city faced.

The city gates were promptly locked at midnight until 7 am the next morning under the king’s supervision. However, an exception was made at Nørreport, where a fee of two skillinger (a considerable sum by today’s standards) could be paid to the night watchman in order to be able to enter.

For anyone whose daily affairs led them in and out of the city, the system was rather inconvenient.

Every Wednesday and Saturday, hundreds of merchants along with their wagons lined up outside the gates of Copenhagen for admittance, sometimes even from 1 am to secure a place in the long queues.

Arduous customs inspections, multiple fee charges and intricate receipts made the process cumbersome. In addition the gates were fairly narrow, making it difficult for large wagons to pass through.

Though originally designed to deter smuggling and robbery, by the 1850s the city lockdown had become an obstacle to its economic growth. Finally, in the late 1850s, the fortifications were demolished, taking away with them much of the city’s aesthetic appeal. To see what an original fort looked like, one must go to Kastellet – the remains of a 17th century citadel – and walk on top of the ancient earthworks.

Copenhagen today THE WEALTH gap that divided residents in the 18th and 19th centuries is now almost non-existent. Danish government’s welfare programs have helped narrow the income disparity among Denmark’s residents, which is now the second smallest among the world’s 34 most developed economies (according to the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development).

The idea of a generous government-provided cushion for ordinary people is deeply rooted in a nation with few outward signs of a pampered elite.

Copenhagen’s visual history has now been digitalised by the Copenhagen City Archives, with over 700 century-old maps and information available online. You can now delve deeper into and understand the medieval city’s development over the past several hundred years.

HISTORY

28 June - 15 August 2019

17

Flagged legend: Peeling away the myths that surround a national icon Often trumpeted as the oldest flag in Europe, the Dannebrog recently celebrated its official 800th birthday.

But it is in fact even older, as it was originally the banner of the Holy Roman Empire CPH POST

T

HE DATE 15 June 1219 holds a special place in the heart of Danes as the official birthday of their national flag, the Dannebrog. Every year on Valdemar’s Day – a tribute to the king on the throne at the time, Valdemar II – the flags can be seen fluttering all over the country.

Earlier this month the 800th anniversary was duly marked –

by Queen Margrethe in Estonia, where the flag miraculously fell down from heaven to inspire the Danish army to victory, and by Prince Joachim, Crown Princess Mary and many others at Copenhagen City Hall.

Her majesty’s visit to Tallinn was particularly fitting as the Estonian capital was founded

by Valdemar II. Tallinn literally means ‘Danish City’ and a white cross on red ground figures in its city arms.

Banner from heaven SAID TO be the oldest national flag in the world still in use today, the origin of the Dannebrog is shrouded in fable and myth originating in the reign of Valdemar II. Harbouring dreams of reigning over a Danish empire that would embrace both the North and Baltic seas, Valdemar saw the German advance into the Baltic countries at the eastern end of the seas – where an important trading base was situated – as a direct threat to Denmark’s interests.

Sending out a call to all Danish villages to provide their quota of ships, the Danish naval fleet set sail eastwards on a mission to secure a presence in the region by invading Estonia.

By obtaining the Pope’s blessing,

the expedition was recognised as a genuine crusade against the pagans of Estonia.

After landing in Lyndanisse, the Danes were met by Estonian leaders who came bearing gifts and feigning surrender to the invading army. However on 15 June 1219, thousands of Estonians launched a surprise attack on the Danish camp.

The ill-prepared Danes suffered huge losses and were on the verge of losing the battle.

As legend has it, that was when Archbishop Anders Suneson fell to his knees to pray for a sign of victory.

In answer to his prayer, a red flag with a white cross is said to have fallen from heaven. The flag was taken as a ‘sign of God’ and the king took it in his hands and waved it to his despondent soldiers, giving them the hope and courage to push forwards and win the battle – thus making Estonia a part of the Danish Empire.

Although no historical evidence supports these claims, as the first accounts of the so-called miracle came 300 years later and differed in various ways from the famous story, the tale of how the national flag came to be has become part of Danish folklore.

Thanks Bomber Harris!

THE STORY of the flag doesn’t stop there, however. Another narrative says that the original flag that floated down from heaven was used again when the Danes againt tried to conquer Dithmarschen in north Germany under King Hans in 1500.

The Danes, who thought they were in for an easy victory, lost not only the battle but also their precious flag in the encounter.

The stolen flag was hung up in a church in Dithmarschen where it stayed until 1559 when King Frederik II finally conquered the region. Frederik then took the flag to Schleswig Cathedral (in present day northern Germany) where it remained until its last shreds disintegrated.

Other accounts of where the

Dannebrog came from speculate that a white cross on red bunting was sent by the pope to the Danish king for use in a crusade against the eastern pagans, or that it was the symbol of the Knights of St John of Jerusalem, or Knights Hospitallers. Another account claims it originated in 1208 at the Battle of Fellin and not the 1219 Battle of Lyndanisse.

The oldest existing flag of recent times, dating from 1427, was preserved at St Mary’s Church in Lübeck until it was destroyed by an Allied bombing raid during the World War II. Life before Dannebrog THE NAME ‘Dannebrog’ probably derives from the Frisian words for ‘dan’ (red) and ‘broge’ (white cloth).

The earliest concrete source linking the flag to a Danish king is a Dutch armorial written between 1340 and 1370 that contains the Danish flag among a listing of almost 2,000 coatsof-arms from all over Europe.

King Valdemar IV the Victorious (Valdemar Atterdag) was therefore probably the first Danish king to use the flag, and it is interesting to note that he grew up at the imperial court in Aachen (Aix-La-Chapelle) in today’s Germany, and it was there that he doubtless came across the red banner of the Holy Roman Empire with its white cross.

The Holy Roman Empire is the name applied to the European territories ruled by Charlemagne (crowned in 754) and is a continuation of the original Roman Empire which existed until 1806.

In a song dating from 1500, the red-and-white banner is associated with Emperor Constantine the Great’s dream of the cross at the Battle of the Milvian Bridge outside Rome in 312 AD. It was during this campaign that Constantine, the first Christian emperor of Rome and founder of Constantinople, was said to have seen a vision of the cross of Christ superimposed upon the

“God’s throwing in the towel ... let’s prove him wrong”

sun accompanied by the words: ‘In hoc signo vinces’ (in this sign conquer), which established the white cross as a dominant motif in crusader flags.

Shortly before 1200 the red flag with a white cross replaced the original, completely red flag of the Holy Roman Empire, on which the emperor superimposed a white cross when he embarked on crusades.

Long before becoming the national flag of Denmark, the red-and-white flag was used by the Portuguese Order of Christ during an early 14th century crusade against the Moors, as well as being adopted by the Duchy of Savoy (Savoie), now a part of France, and used similarly to give crusades the imprimatur of the Holy Roman Empire.

Similarly the myth of the Dannebrog falling from heaven is related to Constantine’s miraculous vision, and it first appeared in a Portuguese version.

Proud nationalism “IT IS NONSENSE to call the Dannebrog the oldest flag in Europe – it is a copy of the Holy Roman Empire’s flag, which is much older,” Nils G Bartholdy, a heraldry expert at the Danish State Archives, told CPH POST many moons ago.

“Lots of countries have flags with crosses. Look at the banners of the other Scandinavian

countries and the flag of England – the cross of St George – which is just the Dannebrog in reverse.”

Today the flag serves as a symbol of the nation’s history and people, used for diverse purposes such as greeting family and friends arriving at the airport, advertising special prices at the supermarket and marking special occasions such as birthdays.

This everyday usage dates back to the 1800s when common people started using the flag on ‘unofficial’ days, such as weddings, birthdays, and funerals so often that in 1834 King Frederik VI issued an edict reserving the right to fly the national flag exclusively to the state and royalty. However, popular enthusiasm for the flag led to the edict being rescinded in 1854.

Every year Danmarks-Samfundet – an independent, non-governmental organisation whose job it is “to strengthen national solidarity … around the national symbol of Dannebrog” – raises money and gives out flags to various associations and groups around the country.

Given the flag’s fabled beginnings and its special place in the heart of the country, the red and white Dannebrog is a distinctly Danish icon and a unique national symbol that doesn’t look like it will be lost again anytime soon.

18

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

28 June - 15 August 2019

Beautiful, friendly, ugly – it’s festival season We’ve selected 25 of the best events taking place this summer EDWARD OWEN

I

T’S THE summer, and with the summer comes the festival season.

Whether you want something mainstream, more alternative, or a little holiday with the family, there is something for you.

We’ve compiled a list of some of the best festivals taking place over the next few months in the Copenhagen area, Denmark and slightly further afield.

Let’s hope the good weather holds out!

ZEALAND: MUSICAL MAINSTAYS

Roskilde Festival June 29-July 7; Darupvej 19, Roskilde; sold out; roskilde-festival.dk Denmark’s famous Roskilde Festival is unsurprisingly sold out – although you may be lucky enough to find a late ticket via a forum or elsewhere online. This year’s line-up boasts none other than Bob Dylan, The Cure, Mø and many more big name acts from across the musical spectrum. Go hard, or go home.

Friday Rock at Tivoli Every Fri until the end of Sep; Tivoli; season pass 350kr, otherwise prices vary; fredagsrock.dk Step into the wonderful Tivoli Gardens to enjoy an exciting Friday night concert. Upcoming acts include Tina Dickow, Lauryn Hill and Mø.

Copenhagen Jazz Festival July 5-14; multiple locations in Cph; prices vary; jazz.dk Cop a squat or cut some rug, it’s jazz! The city’s annual celebration of jazz gets underway next week and there will be plenty going on with events spread throughout the city at a diverse range of venues (see

No mistaking that orange glow

page 19 for more details, or our special supplement, which was released last issue).

ZEALAND: SOMETHING ALTERNATIVE

Grøn Koncert

Musik I Lejet

July 18-28, 13:00-21:30; various venues across DK; 275kr; groenkoncert.dk/valby It’s that time of year again: Grøn Koncert! Danish acts Alphabeat and Dizzy Mizz Lizzy are among those performing and working their way across the country. A good old-fashioned day of fun with a range of food and drink available. All profits from stall sales go to Muskelsvindfonden’s work.

July 18-20; Hovedgaden 110, Tisvildeleje; ticket prices vary; musikilejet.dk Right next to the beach and with an ocean backdrop, this is the ultimate summer festival to get to. In between your favourite acts you can go surfing, play volleyball or enjoy a cocktail whilst gazing at the horizon.

Ringsted Festival Aug 1-3; Tvær Alle, Ringsted; festival pass: 1,015kr; ringstedfestival.dk Some of the biggest and most popular acts in Denmark will be at this festival, including Suspekt and The Minds of 99 – to mention just a couple. With party tents, an atmospheric backdrop and a reputation for being a ‘loving’ festival, this one is worth the short journey.

Summer in the City July 18-21, 15:00-02:00; Onkel Dannys Plads 1-9, Cph V; free adm Back for the fifth time this excellent music festival showcases new and upcoming names from the Danish scene.

Nakkefestival July 24-27; Søndervangsvej 43, Rørvig; 280-625kr; nakkefestival.dk This non-profit festival prides itself on inviting challenging artists from different genres.

Including storytelling, self-invented languages and upcoming bands, this really is something

different. Expand your mind in this neck of the woods.

tic venues, from nightclubs to churches. Most are free entry.

Carpark Festival

New Note Festival

July 26-27; Under Bispeengbuen, Frederiksberg; free adm; carparkfestival.dk Celebrating its fifth year, Carpark Festival reliably offers a unique festival experience with cultural activities and music from more than 20 acts over two days.

Aug 9-10, 14:00 start; Klaverfabrikken, Fredensvej 12A, Hillerød; 150-250kr; newnotefestival.dk Two days of performances from some of the country’s most promising acts.

Strøm Festival

Aug 23-24, 16:00-02:00 & 14:30-02:00; Enghavevej 80, Cph SV; 145-195kr; uhoert.dk Established in 2013, Uhørt has come a long way in a short time to become an absolute must for new-music lovers. This festival provides a stage to young emerging Danish talents.

Aug 7-10; various venues in Cph; stromcph.dk Strøm Festival will once again offer electronic music fans a wide choice of events featuring big names from Denmark and the US at a number of eclec-

Uhørt

FESTIVAL

28 June - 15 August 2019

BEYOND BORDERS

IN THE STICKS

Tinderbox June 27-29; Tussindaarsskoven, Odense; festival pass: 2,095kr; tinderbox.dk The Millenium Forest makes for a wonderful setting at this highly popular festival. A strong and diverse line-up includes established names Sheryl Crow and Eric Prydz, as well as exciting new acts like young Norwegian sensation Sigrid.

Aarhus Jazz July 13-20; various venues; ticket prices vary; jazzfest.dk Now more than 30 years old, the jazz festival in Aarhus will again be providing a buzz all over town. With more venues than ever, there’s no sign of this old-timer slowing down.

Samsø Festival

Smukfest

July 17-20; Strandskoven 7C, Samsø; mostly sold out, see website for remaining day tickets; samfest.dk Skanderborg might have Denmark’s most beautiful festival, but Samsø has the friendliest.

Music, sun and a beach – this is another festival with the potential for an amazing few days. Big name Danish acts – get yourself a ticket if you can!

Aug 7-11; Skanderborg Forest; sold out (Sunday bracelet: 275kr); smukfest.dk In case you didn’t get it, this is Denmark’s most beautiful festival. Every year the forest of Skanderborg comes even more alive, as upwards of 55,000 people celebrate together at a beautiful setting. Boasting around 170 acts in a versatile program of great music.

Grim Fest

Wonderfestiwall

Aug 1-3; Grimhøjvej 20, Brabrand; festival pass: 770kr; grimfest.dk This ugly duckling of a rock festival is sitting pretty just outside Aarhus. There’s a skate contest on Saturday, and with names like The Entrepreneurs and Bite the Bullet on the line-up, things aren’t looking quite so grim.

Aug 15-18; Slotsslyngen, Nordbornholm; day tickets: 425kr, festival pass: 875kr; wonderfestiwall.dk A festival on a tiny island ... no it’s not Fyre, it’s Wonderfestiwall on beautiful Bornholm.

The island is a classic holiday destination for the Danes – this one really is a great opportunity to kill two birds with one stone.

Expect popular Scandinavian acts.

Tønder Festival Aug 22-25; Vestergade 80, Tønder; day tickets from 300kr; tf.dk More than 40 years old, the folk festival at Tønder offers three days of rich and varied music from home and abroad. You will hear music that has roots in a range of genres (blues, country, old-time), and it will proudly be ‘hand-made’.

19

out West’ flag – your chance to experience big artists on smaller stages.

Wacken (Germany)

Summerburst (Sweden)

Aug 1-3; Hauptstraße 47, Wacken, Germany; sold out; wacken. com Wacken is a massive open-air festival for fans of metal music.

It’s sold out, but if metal is your thing you should keep an eye online for any opportunities to bag a ticket and then pay homage to the ‘Metal Mecca’.

Aug 30-31; Stockholms Stadion, Stockholm, Sweden; tickets from 951 krona; summerburst.se Electronic house and dance are on the agenda in Stockholm.

Well-known acts include Calvin Harris and Tiesto. Just the ticket if you like to dance.

Way out West (Sweden)

Sep 18-21; Reeperbahn, Hamburg, Germany; tickets 39-105 euros; reeperbahnfestival.com For the 14th year in a row the well-known Reeperbahn district of Hamburg will be holding 600 concerts at 70 venues. In classic St Pauli fashion, it’s all about fostering a spirit of diversity and togetherness. Hamburg is directly accessible from Copenhagen via train.

Aug 8-10; Slottsskogen, Gothenburg, Sweden; festival pass 1,995 krona; wayoutwest.se Just a few hours on the train and you could be enjoying high-profile performers such as The Cure and Stormzy. At the end of the night the party carries on all over Gothenburg at venues displaying the ‘Stay

FOR THE FAMILY

Vig Festival July 11-13, 15:30 start; Holbækvej 16B, Vig; day tickets: 750kr; vigfestival.dk One for the whole family, Vig offers a variety of ticket types to suit your needs. A plethora of big-name Danish acts will take to the stage. Lots of interesting stalls, a cosy atmosphere and something for everyone.

Reeperbahn (Germany)

Langelandsfestival July 20-27; Ryttergårdsvej 116, Farum; multiple ticket options; langelandsfestival.dk Langelands has Danish acts that you know and love – including headliners Nik & Jay, Suspekt and D-A-D. Meanwhile, Børneland will keep the kids happy.

This is a festival for everyone – either for a great day out or a small holiday.

20 COMMUNITY

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

28 June - 15 August 2019

FREDAGSROCK FACEBOOK PAGE

SHAKESPEARE FESTIVAL FACEBOOK PAGE

Fredagsrock (Friday Rock) takes place at Tivoli, Denmark’s most popular venue for open-air concerts, every Friday over the summer. Most of the concerts are free once you’ve paid the entrance to Tivoli (ongoing, ends Sep 27, 22:00-00:00; Tivoli; fredagsrock.dk)

Calling all Shakespeare enthusiasts! At the Shakespeare Festival for over three weeks there will be extraordinary yet very different open-air performances. Definitely worth the trip to Helsingør!

(Aug 1- 23; Kronborg 2C, Helsingør; hamletscene.dk)

Take a day trip to marvel at giant sculptures created by international artists at the Sand Sculpture Festival. Enjoy activities or laze around at the nearby harbour (ongoing, ends Oct 20, 10:0017:00; Kajgaden 7, Hundested; sandfestival.dk)

Take an architectural journey through history – all the way from the Big Bang to the future at this huge exhibition by the Bjarke Ingels Group.

Enjoy free admission if you’re under the age of 25 (ongoing, ends Jan 5, 10:00-21:00; Brydhuspladsen 10, Cph K; dac.dk)

SILENTS EVENTS DK FACEBOOK PAGE

ABSALON FACEBOOK PAGE

GUNG HO DANMARK FACEBOOK PAGE

Enjoy three different kinds of music at the Silent Disco.

Sway away all night long (Aug 9, 20:00-2:00; Reffen 209, Refshalevej 209A, Cph K; free adm)

Engage in a calm yoga session accompanied by live music every Monday (July 1-29, 22:00-23:30, Absalon, Sønder Boulevard 72, Cph V; 50kr)

Go Gung-Ho on an inflatable 5km obstacle course.

It is all about having fun (June 29, 09:00-16:00; Valbyparken, Hammelstrupvej 100, Cph SV)

VIKING FESTIVAL FACEBOOK PAGE

ABSALONCPH.DK

RHK FESTIVAL FACEBOOK PAGE

Righospitalets Kollegium opens its doors to the RHK Festival, Copenhagen’s largest twoday summer festival (Aug 2, 12:00-Aug 4, 06:00; Jagtvej 120, Cph N; free adm)

DANSK ARKITEKTUR CENTER FACEBOOK PAGE

KONGENS HAVE FACEBOOK PAGE

EXPERIMENTARIUM FACEBOOK PAGE

Open-Air Kongens Have will be showing an absolute classic in the form of 2001: A Space Odyssey. Also with chillout music and DJs from 16:00, these summer gatherings should not be missed – arrive early to get a good spot. (July 31Aug 1; Kongens Have, Cph; free adm)

Take a trip with your children to a world-class science centre that celebrates curiosity and a playful approach to science. Experimentarium brings science to life through hands-on exploration (open daily 09:30-17:00; Tuborg, Havnevej 7, Hellerup; experimentarium.dk)

TV2 Zulu is rolling out the big screen again with Summer Bio 2019. During an evening of open-air cinema you’ll be on the edge of your blanket watching the crime-drama Holiday. Or bring a picnic and enjoy a romantic summer evening watching A Star is Born (Aug 14-15; Ved Øksnehallen, Halmtorvet 11, Cph V; free adm)

SAND SCULPTURE FESTIVAL FACEBOOK PAGE

For a month of Sundays Tivoli will be offering movie nights on the lawn. In the beautiful Tivoli surroundings the theme is of course romantic.

Expect both new and old classics, including Bridget Jones’ Diary and Mama Mia 2. Kicks off with Crazy Rich Asians on July 7 (July 7, 14, 21 & 28, 20:00; Tivoli Gardens, Cph K; entry fees vary)

Hepcats Copenhagen is again arranging swing dancing at Kultorvet during the Copenhagen Jazz Festival. Starting with an hour of teaching, the floor then opens up to a two-hour free-for-all.

Enjoy great company and high spirits, as well as live bands on July 6 & 13 (July 4-14, 17:30-20:30; Kultorvet near the Round Tower, Cph K)

OMTV2.TV2.DK

TIVOLI

HEPCAPS FACEBOOK PAGE

COMING UP SOON

Get a group of two to six friends together and join this summer music quiz to guess titles, artists, years, lyrics and much more (July 17, 20:00-22:00; Sonder Blvd 72, Cph V; 30kr; absaloncph.dk)

Explore Viking and Nordic metal music along with Viking culture and old Nordic traditions at the Viking Festival (Aug 9, 16:00- Aug 10, 22:00; Valbyparken, Cph; tickets from fritid.dk) RUCHI PUJARI

FESTIVAL

28 June - 15 August 2019

21

Copenhagen Jazz Festival international highlights – a mighty fine nine Our resident expert Stephen Gadd has cast his eye over the concerts that haven’t sold out (unless stated) yet to put together his own special selection

Bill Charlap Trio

DR Koncerthuset; July 9 at 20:00 Not strictly jazz perhaps, but Mariza, one of the greatest Portuguese Fado singers of the younger generation, has a string of acclaimed CDs and many international awards.

Den Sorte Diamant, Dronningesalen; July 12 at 20:00 Master bassist, musical creative force and feted producer Bill Laswell is fronting the Danish group Kalaha.

Bremen Teater; July 10 at 20:00 If classic piano trios are your thing, they don’t get much better than this. New Yorker Charlap and his trio explore ‘the great American songbook’ in their own sweet way.

Evan Parker

Eliane Elias

Carsten Dahl Ensemble

Christianshavn Beboerhus; July 6 at 22:00 This veteran British saxophonist and free-jazz pioneer has never lost his taste for exploring the boundaries of jazz and transcending them.

Tivoli Glassalen; July 7 at 19:30 A fairly frequent visitor to the jazz festival, the flamboyant Brazilian pianist-singer never fails to please. She’s in town with her husband, the bassist Marc Johnson, and the Tivoli Big Band.

Den Sorte Diamante, Droningesalen; July 10 at 20:00 Danish pianist Carsten Dahl’s homage to American piano titan Keith Jarrett takes the form of arranging some of Jarrett’s solo improvisations for an ensemble that includes a string quartet.

Gladys Knight

Gilberto Gil

Marcus Miller

(PHOTO: OFFICIAL FACEBOOK PAGE)

Bill Laswell & Kalaha (PHOTO: OFFICIAL FACEBOOK PAGE

Mariza

(PHOTO: OFFICIAL FACEBOOK PAGE)

DR Koncerthuset; July 10 at 21:00; sold out A guitarist, composer, singer and activist, Gilberto Gil is one of Brazil’s greatest cultural figures. Gil is known for teaming up with bossa nova legend Joao Gilberto and starting tropicália with long-time collaborator Caetano Veloso.

(PHOTO: BENGT NYMAN)

(PHOTO: MINISTÉRIO DA CULTURA DO BRASIL)

(PHOTO: DWIGHT MCCANN)

DR Koncerthuset; July 12 & 13 at 20:00 Gladys Knight has long been one of the greatest. Having recorded more than 38 albums over the years, this seven-time Grammy winner has smashed out #1 hits in Pop, Gospel, R&B and and Contemporary.

DR Koncerthuset; July 14 at 20:00 Marcus Miller is an award-winning US jazz composer, producer and multi-instrumentalist, who has worked with Aretha Franklin, Miles Davis, Luther Vandross, Herbie Hancock, Eric Clapton, Jay-Z and Beyonce.

FOR A WIDER SELECTION OF WHAT THE 2019 COPENHAGEN JAZZ FESTIVAL HAS TO OFFER, CHECK OUT THE SPECIAL GUIDE THAT CPH POST PUBLISHED LAST EDITION IN CO-OPERATION WITH THE ORGANISERS, WHICH CAN BE FOUND VIA THE SUPPLEMENTS SECTION AT CPHPOST.DK

22 EVENTS

THE COPENHAGEN POST | CPHPOST.DK

Copenhagen Jazz Festival July 5-14; multiple locations in Cph; prices vary; jazz.dk The city’s annual celebration of jazz returns, once again bringing some of the world’s finest musicians. Events will be spread throughout the city at a diverse range of venues.

Valby Summer Jazz July 5-13; various locations in Valby; prices vary; cowbellmusic.dk Serving as a kind of side-festival to the larger Copenhagen edition, the Valby version aims to capture the same essence but on a more intimate level.

Stella Polaris Aug 3; 12:00-21:00; Frederiksberg Have, Frederiksberg Runddel; free adm; stella-polaris.dk Frederiksberg’s biggest park will again be transformed into one large outdoor chill-out zone, with relaxed electronic music played throughout the day. Bring a picnic or indulge in the diverse street food on offer.

Summer Dance ongoing, ends July 25; Mon-Thu 19.00-22.00; Fælledparken Cph N; sommerdans.dk You can now learn how to dance, for free! There is a range of styles you can choose from including kizomba, tango, folk dance, and Bollywood.

Danish Derby Aug 11, doors open 12:00; Klampenborg Galopbane, Klampenborgvej 52; 90kr; galopbane.dk Held just north of Copenhagen near the deer park, this Danish classic is a great event for the whole family to attend.

Rita’s Blue Flea Market July 21, Aug 18 & Sep 15; 12:0017:00; Kulturhuset Indre By, Cph K Aug 4 & Sep 1; 12:00-1700; Sønder Boulevard, Cph V Rita’s market attracts a younger crowd searching for vintage and second-hand clothing. Fight your way through the crowds to seek out some of that Scandi style.

Move Copenhagen July 11-14; Refshalevej 151, Cph K; ticket prices vary; movecopenhagen. com Celebrating the diversity of movement over several days, the festival hosts over 100 workshops to teach subjects such as slacklining, yoga and parkour.

Friday Night Skate Aug 2 & 23, Sep 13, 20:00-22:15; see fns-cph.dk for starting point; free adm A fun way to experience the city on a summer evening, Friday Night Skate through 20km of Copenhagen is a great way to hang out with friends.

Grøn Koncert Jul 28; 13:00 - 21:30; Valbyparken; 275kr; groenkoncert.dk/valby It’s that time of year again - Grøn Koncert! Danish acts Alphabeat and Dizzy Mizz Lizzy are among those performing. A good old fashioned day of fun with a range of food and drink available. All profits from stall sales go to Muskelsvindfonden’s work.

Fluo Moon Party June 27; secret location TBC Party from midnight to dawn with a playlist of techno, electro and house songs.

28 June - 15 August 2019

Street Food at the Lakes Aug 9-11, Fri 15:00 - 21:00, Sat 11:00 - 21:00, Sun 11:00 - 19:00; Peblinge Dossering CPH N; streetfoodomsoeerne.dk This three day food festival has a focus on diversity and entrepreneurship. All vendors will offer a tasting dish for just 40kr. If you appreciate good food, cold beer and beautiful surroundings then get this one on your calendar. See Facebook for more details.

Crafts And Design Fair Aug 8-10; Frue Plads, Cph K; free adm; dkod.dk This historic crafts and design fair is showing no sign of slowing down. Professionals and amateurs from all over Scandinavia will be there to showcase their pieces, including jewellery pieces and graphic design.

Strøm Festival Aug 7-10; various venues in Cph; stromcph.dk Strøm Festival will once again offer electronic music fans a wide choice of events featuring big names from Denmark and the US at a number of eclectic venues, from nightclubs to churches.

Most are free entry.

CPH Historic Grand Prix Aug 3-4; Hulgårdsvej, Bellahøj; 300-550kr, under-13s: free adm with a paying adult; chgp.dk The ‘flagship of Danish Motorsports’ will once again take place in Bellahøj this year, offering the thrills and spills of the track, a splendid range of vintage cars, and fun for the youngsters.

Copenhagen Pride Aug 13-18; various venues; copenhagenpride.dk The largest human rights festival in Denmark is mostly held at Pride Square and Rådhuspladsen, offering a week of free concerts and shows that accumulate in a huge parade on Saturday the 17th.

Andy Warhol March 30-Sep 8; Moderna Museet Malmö; free adm Discover a whole new side of Warhol that you didn’t know existed.

The exhibition is created in a very special atmosphere including silver foiled walls, quotes, murals and a soundtrack with all the Velvet Underground songs. (PM) Stråla Yoga at Absalon Fridays 09:15; Absalon Church, Sonder Boulevard 73, Cph V; 50kr Stråla Yoga focuses more on the process than the final postures, leaving more space to move intuitively and naturally. (PM) Pub quizzes June 27, July 11 & 25, Aug 8, 19:30; The Globe, Nørregade 43, Cph K; 30kr, five per team / July 1, 19:30; Kennedy’s, Gammel Kongevej 23, Cph V; 25kr, four per team Don’t miss the quizzes at the Globe and Kennedy’s. The winners get 1,000 kroner at the Globe, and 800 at Kennedy’s.

Improv Comedy CPH nights weekly shows Thu & Fri 20:00, Sat 19:00, 20:00 & 21:00, Sun 18:00; Frederiksholm Kanal 2, Cph K; 100-125kr Improv Comedy CPH offers English-language shows throughout the summer, but with a slightly more limited program. So check the website before you go.

Copenhagen Fashion Week Aug 6-9; various venues; copenhagenfashionweek.com Scandinavia’s largest fashion week mainly consists of industry events.

But running alongside the runway and trade shows, there are a number of events geared towards fashion lovers, from free goodie bag promotions to the fabulous events on Strøget.

Summer in the City July 18-21; 15:00 - 02:00; Onkel Dannys Plads 1-9, Cph V; free adm Back for the fifth time this excellent music festival showcases new and upcoming names from the Danish scene. (EO) Bubbles and Oysters Every Friday until the end of August; 16:00 - 18:00; Bøf og Ost, Gråbrødretorv 13, CPH K Oysters 10kr, Bubbles 50kr; www. boef-ost.dk Sit outside and relax at the beautiful Gråbrødretorv whilst enjoying this summer classic combination.

Malmö Festival Aug 9-16; malmofestivalen.se If you’re looking for a getaway from Copenhagen life, head across the Øresund to a festival that bridges music, art, food and culture. With over 1.4 million visitors a year, it is the largest culture festival in Scandinavia.

A World of Love ongoing, ends Sep 8; Arken, Skovvej 100, Ishoj; 60kr; arken.dk A vast exhibition featuring the Australian artist Patricia Piccinini’s wondrous universe of fabulous tales and creatures, which has been known to feature the odd mutated human.

ON SCREENS

28 June - 15 August 2019

23

Genre that enables Richie McFly to revisit the success of his past BEN HAMILTON

I

F SOMETHING’S bad for us, we ban it. Pesticides, guns, drugs with fantastic side-effects – the legislators catch up in the end. Films are a different kettle of fish, though. The authorities tend to ask whether the film is bad for them, often ignoring the true evil lurking in the cinema.

McFly away time travel!

FIRST off, I’m talking about mind-rotting franchises. Fast & Furious: Hobbs and Shaw (Not Released Worldwide; Aug 1) is the ninth film about cars that go quickly – a ladies-only one is planned soon for female fans smitten with a series that treats all women as trophies – and the box office receipts keep on growing. Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham are chief eyebrow-raisers in this one.

Second off, let’s ban time travel films. Of course, I’m not proposing we go back in time to wipe the Back to the Future sequels from existence, particularly as the fate of Biff Tannen foretold the equally unlikely rise of Donald Trump, but maybe we could do that to About Time, a horrendous 2013 film directed and written by Richard Curtis.

This film was only made so they could put “From the writer of ‘Four Weddings’ and ‘Notting Hill’” on the poster. Had any aspiring writers produced this drivel, it would have been spat

on, but Curtis, who ran out of ideas last century, simply reached for the option that never fails established creators. And now he has done it again with Yesterday (54; June 27), in which a musician wakes up to realise he’s the only person alive who has heard of the Beatles.

Of course there are going to be a few funny lines, along with amusing cameos courtesy of the ever-grateful cast of Love Actually, but producers are optioning this nonsense at the expense of quality that will never see the light of day.

Once upon a … cock-up GOING back in time is fun if you want to read negative reviews of masterpieces. The BBC recently wrote a howler about the new Quentin Tarantino film Once Upon a Time in … Hollywood (88; Aug 15 – preview in next issue), which looks set to be the best film of the decade. Some 25 years ago it was left to the LA Times to play fall guy in its writeup of Pulp Fiction (94; July 25 – anniversary re-release), which it decried as “creative desperation” by a director “scrambling for any way to offend sensibilities”.

The Washington Post called Disney’s The Lion King “downright strange” back in 1994 – and now it’s back in live-action with James Earl Jones, now 88, retained to voice the part of Simba’s father. With Donald Glover, Beyonce and Chiwetel Ejiofor, there are far more black actors involved

in this version of The Lion King (NRW; July 17) than previously.

Three of the four ‘mixed’ reviews of The Sisters Brothers (78; June 27) – a 2018 dramedy western starring Joacquim Phoenix and John C Reilly as bounty hunting siblings – were handed out by British broadsheets.

And also arriving late to Danish screens is the promising teenage skater drama MID90S (66; July 11), the debut film of Jonah Hill, who used to work at a skateboard shop in Santa Monica.

Conjuring up shite MOST DRAMAS fail these days, or at least they’re outshone by the rich character motivation of television. Cinema-goers prefer quick shocks, which might explain why there are four horros this edition. Anabelle comes Home (NRW; June 27), from The Conjuring universe looks like a rip-off of Child’s Play (NRW; July 18), which returns with Mark Hamill voicing Chucky, the killer doll who so badly wants to be as frightening as the last minute of Don’t Look Now. Much more promising are Midsommar (73; July 11) and Scary Stories to tell in the Dark (NRW; Aug 8). The former stars Florence Pugh as a troubled American on holiday in northern Sweden to celebrate the longest day of the year, with no idea she’s the main course. While the latter is another of those ‘don’t touch/ take/read that book!’ films, but it

doesn’t look too bad. Guillermo del Toro is among the contributing writers, and Norway’s André Øvredal (Troll Hunter) directs.

Poms (36; Aug 8), the tale of a bunch of pensioners who form a cheerleading group, is a horror of sorts, and presumably The Angry Birds Movie 2 (NRW; Aug 8) has a few Hitchcockian nods, but life’s too short to care.

Do you have time to watch the entire Marvel Universe collection before Spider-Man: Far From Home (NRW; July 2), because that’s the asking price. But there are no spoilers in Apollo 11 (87; June 27) – it’s not one for the conspiracy theorists.

That might disappoint Homeland’s Israeli creator Gideon Raff, as he likes a bit of intrigue, and with Michael K Williams and Ben Kingsley onboard for his latest venture, The Red Sea Diving Resort (Netflix; July 31), the true story of how Mossad agents tried to rescue Sudanese-based Jews in 1981, we have high hopes.

Point Blank (Netflix; July 12), a remake of the acclaimed French film A bout portant, looks passable as well.

Eating Crowe OVER ON TV land we’ve got lots of big series returning, and beyond the obvious choices – Stranger Things (S3; Netflix; July 4) and Orange is the New Black Black (S3; Netflix; July 27) – we would recommend you get with the program with Snowfall

(S3; HBO Nordic; July 11) and Succession (S3; HBO Nordic; Aug 12). The same can’t be said of Glow (S3; Netflix; Aug 10), which had a lacklustre S2 after a solid opening.

Also coming back for more are Workin’ Mums (S2; Netflix; July 25), You Me Her (S4; Netflix; July 12), Yummy Mummies (S2; Netflix; July 3), Queer Eye (S4; Netflix; July 19), Divorce (S3; HBO Nordic; July 2) and Sweetbitter (S2; C More; Aug 4).

That leaves us with five new series, of which The Loudest Voice (HBO Nordic; July 1) is the clear pick. Russell Crowe has slobbed on the pounds to portray Fox News’s founding chief executive Roger Ailes, and the result is a top notch depiction of our recent past that couldn’t be more relevant to today’s Trumpian troubles.

The documentary series I love you, now die (HBO Nordic; July 10) details the disturbing case of a woman who convinced her online boyfriend to kill himself, while garish looking pair Grand Hotel (C More; Aug 15) and Another Life (Netflix; July 25) are probably best avoided. That leaves futuristic drama The Rook (C More; July 10) in which the main character has amnesia – another plot device I’m tempted to ban.

Maybe Richard Curtis’s previous endeavours (most particularly Blackadder) have earned him a free pass, but really Richard, it’s time you retire so we can all shout ‘About Time’ together.

Try the finest Danish courses in town

Do you have a taste for high-quality learning, outstanding teachers and fast progression? At Studieskolen, Danish has been on the menu for more than 40 years. We know how to serve it.

Choose from a variety of different classes at studieskolen.dk

Check out what’s cooking at Studieskolen