My Faith Journey Story by Gini Walker

When my dad heard my mom was pregnant with me in the mid-1940’s he said, “I could have done without that”… not easy news for a man with an 8th-grade education, barely making ends meet with three children, one of whom had severe physical disabilities.

My sense of worthlessness and insecurity was very much the driving force in my life. And dad’s hot temper and deeply felt emotions were the traits I took as my own. Strange as it may seem, in this ambiguous atmosphere, I knew Dad loved God and was a believer in Jesus. In my mirroring of Dad, I wanted his faith, but my troubling doubts of value kept me in that state of worthlessness. How could God love this strong-willed, explosive, insecure person? I had no peace.

In the early years of my married life, I attempted to resolve the ambivalence and experienced a spiritual surrender of self to Jesus BUT my rebelliousness kept me wandering. I wanted life my way. So, the doubts of worth continued.

The Bible says in Psalm 40 (NLT), “... and He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.” I took these words personally. I believed God does care about my day-to-day existence. Yet, I was SO rebellious. So God took the initiative. In 1999, I had a growth in my brain causing life-changing health issues.

I believe God touched my brain and said, “I want your attention.” Although the rebellious issues still taunt me, more of His Words keep me centered:

“Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins. (Psalm 51:1 NLT)

Again and again, God’s timing in my life has been impeccable… I am so glad He took the initiative because in 2005 our son married and in 2008 and 2011 our two grandchildren were born. What I would be missing if I continued my rebellious wanderings!

There are three things that convince me most of God’s love: Our complex universe, the complex design of my mind and body, and the moral code I have regarding right and wrong. For me, these needed a creator. And this Creator personally loves me beyond any love I’ve ever known.

Although her parent and siblings were born in Arkansas, Gini was born and raised in California. She has been married to Charlie for more than 53 years. They live in Orange County, CA. Their son and daughter-in-law, granddaughter, and grandson live nearby. Gini was active in the education of elementary school-age children. Feeling a misfit in education, she turned to and became active in adult ministry at their church. Gini and Charlie have a joint ministry—12 years ago, Charlie designed and built a guest house on the back of their property. It is named Onesimus House, a gift from God of respite and renewal to missionaries from around the world. They call themselves God’s caretakers of this delightful place of rest and renewal. Gini’s hobbies are gardening, reading, and writing. Their 3-year-old dog, Jackson, is such a joy in their lives. Gini and Charlie are members of Trinity Presbyterian Church of Orange County.

Gini and Charlie Walker