Finding Refuge In God's Grace by Joel Berry

The Great Recession dealt a devastating blow to my business. Following a record-setting year, I looked forward to signing contracts with several major new clients. The addition of only one major client would allow me to retire early, still in my fifties. I never expected to retire early, but God blessed me with a business engagement that provided abundance, both for my family and my employees. I looked forward to financial security and freedom to play golf whenever I wanted. Then came the recession. By mid-2008, all of my prospects vanished as people lost their jobs and decision-makers imposed moratoriums on new contracts. As the year drew to a close, I reluctantly released all of my employees.

My wife, Cheri, and I lived below our means, saving for emergencies. We knew from experience how to survive income gaps. We felt prepared to ride out the recession, even with both of our sons in college. Surely, the economy would turn around in a few months. We trusted God would provide the next opportunity as we recalled times over the past fifteen years that He had brought new clients, seemingly out of nowhere.

As many months passed without success, I decided to search for a job. A licensed CPA, I expected to find something I could do; but employers expressed no interest in hiring a self-employed fifty-something-year-old who had spent the past fifteen years doing only one thing. Months turned to years as I desperately sought new opportunities. I pleaded with God to intervene, often reminding Him of my faithfulness to Him, as though that should merit His favor.

After three years of searching, I found a national company that expressed interest in signing a contract. I thought, “Praise God, He finally heard my call and answered my prayers!” But later that same week, just before Cheri and I left the house to attend a fundraising banquet, my contact called to tell me that their V.P. decided to cancel the project. We left for the banquet, discouraged and in no mood to listen to an appeal for donations. I later recorded in my journal:

The past few days I have struggled with the thought, “does God really even care?” I know, deep in my soul, that He does, but my anger and bitterness have clouded my vision. I have continued my daily Bible reading and have tried to pray, but I don’t have much to say to God. I don’t know what to say to God.

This morning, before I started my search for new prospects, I surrendered to God’s will once again. I asked Him to fill me with His Spirit, then I recalled specific events in my life where I have clearly seen His provision. He assured me that He is faithful and that I need to persevere.

I quoted from 2 Corinthians 12:9–10: “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (NIV)

I wanted Paul’s words to ring true in my life. I had often experienced the sustenance of God’s grace, but my circumstances obscured my vision of Him. How could I find rest in His grace when it seemed I might never work again?

A few weeks later, our pastor preached from the same passage I wrote in my journal, then shared a video interview of a family in the church. The husband, a successful builder and developer, watched helplessly as the recession devastated his business. He and his wife lost everything. They went from living in a beautiful home to moving in with his parents. They pleaded with God to restore their finances, but He had not. They could have turned away from God in anger but instead sought refuge in Him. They did not know if God would ever restore their finances, but they trusted that God’s grace would sustain them.

Their story both encouraged and humbled me. Though difficult, my circumstances paled compared to their loss. If they could seek refuge in God’s grace, I certainly could.

We endured another year of unemployment before God brought a client, seemingly out of nowhere. The financial drought made a dent in our savings, but we lost nothing during those four years except the prospect of early retirement. God, in His infinite wisdom and by His grace, caused us to prosper ahead of the recession, not so I could retire early, but to provide for us through the drought. We found refuge in God’s grace.

Joel Berry

Joel Berry is an aspiring writer, soon to graduate from Dallas Theological Seminary with a Master of Arts in Biblical Studies. A CPA by profession, Joel serves as a spiritual mentor for men in his local church, and leads an independent Bible study group for married couples. God used a difficult time to lead Joel to discover his love for writing, and to pursue seminary education at DTS. Joel desires to encourage believers to grow deep roots into Jesus Christ so they will remain steadfast in their faith.

Joel and his wife, Cheri, live in Roswell, GA and will soon celebrate their thirty-seventh anniversary. They have two wonderful sons and daughters-in-law.