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Throughout my thesis year the importance of “the process� truly informed the work I was making. I wanted to create something that was outside my comfort zone but still represent who I am as an artist and be able to freely express the inner workings of my mind. The most challenging part of having a year long thesis project for me was definitely being able to seriously commit to an idea especially when I had a hundred things I thought about and not being bored. The year taught me how to do these things and gave me the confidence that I lacked in to successfully complete a project in my own way and to be satisfied with it. The most exciting part for me was the process of trying various different things and being completely uncomfortable, being aware that I might fail, but at the same time discovering something meaningful and finding potential for my work to exist in spaces I hadn’t imagined before. I didnt have a concrete plan for my project and I let my intuition lead me to the final product and that in short defines what my process as an illustrator is.
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The expectation for the thesis year was to have a very concrete idea to begin with and have an organised plan of how to execute it. And so, I came up with the idea of creating a book called “How to not be bored� inspired by my obsession with trying not to be bored but failing, lethargy and malaise and what it means to be alive as a priveledged millenial in this internet obsessed world. It was anticipated to have been a bound book of illustrations documenting what we do when we are bored with a fantastical twist. I still have an attachment to the idea but a month in when I started working on it I got bored with it and wrote it off as unengaging and too commercial. I still have a special place in my heart for this idea and maybe in the future I will find a more exciting and convincing way of executing it but at this point of time I would like to let it rest in peace and be remembered as the first idea sparking all other ideas for my thesis project.
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When I decided to give up on the original idea I found myself in a terribly intimidating and unapproachable space creating giant sized mindblocks in my journey. I felt paralyzed and didnt know how to proceed only knowing that I wanted to do something unique and challenging. Having a very specific plan was clearly not working for me and I had the challenge of finding what it was that would work for me and enable me to proceed. Creating content has always sort of been a struggle for me and this was the first hurdle in my path. I knew I had the ability to make good work but I just didnt know what that work was. I think going through this phase positively affected the following processes that I followed and found courage eventually to let my intuition lead me and block out any other voices that were hindering me.
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In order to get over my mindblocks the first thing I needed to do was to stop thinking and just start making. This is exaclty what I did. I started with taking stacks of paper to free draw with the most immediate materials in sight like pencil, crayon while drawing inspiration from life. I further started curating these drawings and figuring out how they fit together in the same space and discovering that they start to speak and tell a story which was unintentional when assembled together.
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I also started experimenting with collage and writing. The themes of boredom were still present in the work I was making but they started to become abstract and that started feeling more comfortable to me. I mainly drew inspiration from life so most of the inital pieces had a more realistic drawing style combined with interesting itirations of form and color. After experimenting with lose stacks of paper, I started looking at making small experimental zines that were simply bound. Here I explored cut paper, more collage and ways to bind paper of different sizes. This exercise allowed me to create a series of images that started feeling cohesive as well as trying to find connections with words and images. The writing that I did in the zine “dark thoughts” was my own but in “annoyed cigarettes” I was randomizing text borrowed from Patti Smith’s book “Just Kids”. I liked the process of creating images and tying them with text that may or may not belong there and discovering how it started forming a narrative, something that was new in my work.
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The adjacent images is one of the last things I created in the fall semester. I wanted to experiment with a larger scale so I started drawing on a paper that was 28x22�. Here, I drew inspiration from photographs that I had taken as well as added some fantastical elements.
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For the fall show, that goes up in December, I was desperate to try something that was completely new to my illustration practice and so I made a paper mache sculpture. Transforming my 2D work into 3D was always on my agenda from the beginning of starting grad school but surprisingly I hadnt really delved into it till this point. Eventually I ended up making a Paper Mache head with an installation titled “ The Alternation between Affection and Moodiness�. The installation represented my personal feelings and enabled me to communicate with the viewer. The process of making this sculpture was very exciting because I found paper mache surprising and working with a 3D object very engaing. In the installation I displayed the head on a pedestal which I further painted on which also extended its purpose of just being an object on a pedestal to being an object in space that you can look at as a whole. I also displayed my drawings that I was working on, on the wall behind the sculpture and they fit perfectly and provided more context to the installation. This sparked the idea of making more sculptures for my thesis show, tying them with my drawings.
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While I was trying to make work inspired by my own life and tied to my reality I also parallely started making drawings with a lot of fantastical and playful forms that still reflected my innner workings but also abstacted them in a strange bizarre world. These drawings were spontaneous brain dumps of sorts but I discovered that I was creating these whimsical characters that had a very honest appeal and represented the chaos in my mind perfectly. I also really enjoyed being able to draw so freely and discovering interesting forms and shapes that I hadnt drawn before. There was something in these drawings that felt very special to me and at the end of the fall semester I realized I needed to find a way to use these in some way in my final thesis exhibit.
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I have been taking a low credit ceramics class since my first semester here at MICA and it has allowed me to experience a new medium and find ways of converting my illustration into something three dimensional. In the Fall 2016 semester, I started making little ceramic dog sculptures inspired by my own golden retriever Lola (who I miss a lot) ,in stoneware, and me as well as a lot of people viewing them found them really cute and charming and I thought that I should be able to incorporate my ceramic work in my thesis somehow because it was definitely something that I spent a lot of time and effort on and something that, again, was highly influenced by process not knowing what the final result would be. And so, as I was making drawings and sculptures for my thesis I thought why not try to replicate these characters I was drawing in ceramics. I started using porcelain for the first time, charmed by its beautiful white finish and made simple black lines with an underglaze pencil. The result was a set of 39 little sculptures that started speaking a similar language to my mural drawing and I was really happy with the result.
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Coming back to school in the spring semester, it was time to make a decision about what I will finally display in my thesis show and this time that decision suddenly seemed obvious. It was decided I would make a wall mural similar to the fantastical drawings representing my internal world and replicate some of the objects in paper mache. Creating an immersive environment was always on my agenda and so, this solution felt exciting and I thought that all the issues I was having of making a cohesive body of work were resolved. “Say Hello to my Brain� is a blog I started when I was a teenager but this property seemed to fit perfectly with the work I was making for my exhibit and what my illustration practice is about and so, I decided to name my exhibit by the same name.
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I planned to make as many sculptures as I possiby could in a span of one month and that was quite a challenge. The large sizes of the pieces also posed as a challenge and working with the material took patience. I had to find logical solutions to problems that I could not have anticipated because each piece was so different. The following are the basic steps I followed to create each piece: 1. Build a basic structure out of cardboard. 2. Build a 3D form using rolled up paper stuck together. 3. Paper Mache two layers with newsprint/newspaper. 4. Wait to dry. 5. Paper Mache two layers of tissue paper. 6. Wait to dry. 7. Paint and add other embelishments.
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The adjacent image was the preliminary sketch that I made to have a rough plan of how I would lay out my thesis installation. The goal was to create an image as a background and lay out a sculpture garden of sorts in front of the mural creating an immersive enviroment for the viewer to step into. Originally the ceramic sculptures were to have a separate installation space but since the work was cohesive I found a way to incorporate them in the main installation.
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Putting up the exhibit was probably the most stressful, challenging but wonderful and fun part of my year. I had never painted on a large scale before so doing a mural was intiidating but really satisfying in the end. Having the objects I created activate a space was thrilling to see and feel and I really felt like I made something cohesive and engaging in the end and I feel like that satisfaction was worth the endless hours of working late into the night. The following images showcase my entire exhibit.
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The last two years at MICA have been the most challenging years of my life where I discovered my potential and confidence to be a real life illustrator. I hope to keep following the path I am on where I constantly put myself outside my comfort zone discovering new things in my illustration practice. I have realised the most important thing for me to do is trust my instincts and be spontaneous. I am in love with creating images and contributing to adding beauty to this world and that will always be my goal in life. Small Goals for the immediate future include: 1. Painting murals. 2. Doing Window Display/ Set Design jobs using paper mache installations. 3. Being part of gallery shows showcasing my experimental work. 4. Applying my illustrative drawing style to editorial and lifestyle properties. 5. Generating and marketting my ceramic products. 6. Building my personal brand - Say Hello to my Brain
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To my parents, you have been an integral part in making my dreams come true, the reason I am here and I will forever be thankful. I am lucky to have you in my life. Avanti and Ajji for always being there. Whitney Sherman and Kim Hall, for giving me the confidence to support my ideas and guiding me through these last two crazy years. To all the guest critics who provided valuable feedback. Daniel Krall, Kyle Van Horn, Heidi Younger, Shreyas Krishnan and Warren Linn for being really good teachers contributing to enriching my illustration practice. Ryan, for bugging me and for the constant support, feedback and critique. I couldn’t have done it without your help! Lulu, Mengju, Yiran, Fang Fang, Sena Lena and all my crazy ILP classmates! You guys changed my life and I will love you forever!
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