TRAVEL: Philanthropic Surf Trip that tightens the bond between father and son

 Philanthropic  

A bonding experience for parent & child

Getting pitted is the goal of every surf trip

ike any parent, I have been asked what I consider to be the best advice for raising well-adjusted and happy children. My go-to answer is to travel one-on-one with each child you have. This results in both wonderful moments and incredible learning opportunities. I also love to travel with my wife and as a family, but something unique happens during a one-on-one trip.

I am father to two young adults, now 28 and 25, so I am able to offer my perspective from some experience. Since this month is Crown City Magazine's surf issue, I’ll share a sense of why a single surf trip is such a wonderful idea.

When my son Zack was a sophomore in high school, he came to us with the idea of combining a surf trip with a community service project. It was a pretty crafty way to score some waves over spring break! After some discussion, we greenlighted the idea. My son and two friends selected a remote surf camp that had just opened in Bocas del Toro, Panama. The location combined the promise of good surf and an indigenous school that was in need of supplies. We booked the trip and the boys started collecting school supplies for the school.

Our trip tested us in ways we hadn’t anticipated. Our midnight ight from LAX had an early morning layover in San Salvador for what we thought was about two hours. But note: when traveling, be sure to check for time changes. We found ourselves running to the gate desperate to not be left behind. We barely made it before the gate closed, and were the last people to board the plane. Sweating and out of breath, I saw there were two seats available where we boarded in rst class. Giving Zack a wink, we simply sat down and I told him to try his best high school Spanish to sweet-talk the ight attendant. Well, she melted at his halting Spanish and she let us stay! Lessons galore and we hadn’t even arrived in Panama.

Landing in Panama, we gathered our gear and exited the airport looking for our pre-paid driver. Nowhere to be found! Well, no need to panic, we had the boys (the dads didn’t speak Spanish) haggle with several taxi drivers until they found a van big enough for the boards. With two of us turtling under the stack of boards inside the van, we watched the boys’ con dence grow as they laughed about the great “deal” they had negotiated while we drove to the domestic airport for the next leg of our trip.

Young Naso checking out the visitors.

Note 2: when traveling to Latin America, make sure you don’t travel during Carnival! In the little concrete building that comprised the terminal, we encountered about 75 people, all arguing and trying to get on one of the two, 12-seater planes to Bocas. At the counter, we were told the planes were overbooked and our prepaid reservations were no good. They could not get us on a plane for two days!

Trying not to panic, we again leaned on the boys’ beginner Spanish. They gave it a great effort and were able to swing four seats. But, that left two out and splitting up didn’t seem to make sense. Just when dejection and exhaustion seemed to be closing in, we noticed a couple of small prop planes on the tarmac. After some frantic negotiation, we secured a Cessna for the other two and then wrangled up a pilot. Perhaps not the most secure scenario, but we all landed in Bocas an hour later.

Riding the open ponga from Bocas out to Isla Bastimento, our surfboard bags sticking out of the bow and spray from the waves misting our faces, I could see a combination of exhilaration and exhaustion. Yes, we had made it. The boys learned some invaluable lessons in thinking on your feet, not panicking, and they realized how important those Spanish classes really were! They had solved each of the hurdles themselves rather than relying on their dads. Our roles had been unintentionally equalized; we were more peers than father/ son.

The rest of the week was lled with boat rides to crazy surf spots around the islands. “Carneros” is a left point break that peeled away from the jungle background emptying after four to six turns into the turquoise of the Caribbean. “Bluffs” is a crazy shorebreak where everyone got barreled until they were exhausted and sand lled their ears (and more). Hikes through steamy jungles lled with monkeys and red dart frogs led to secret breaks peeling off hidden corners. Total sur ng bliss.

Between all the action, the boys grabbed the donated school supplies and used baseball mitts and paid a visit to the indigenous school. School for the children of local Naso peoples consisted of two concrete huts with no coverings on the windows. There was a spring on the Island where they got their water and a stream of waste that ran from the buildings down to the ocean.

We had been told they were in need of pens, paper and art supplies and that is exactly what the boys brought. All was greatly appreciated, and then the boys started handing out T-shirts and baseball gear. Talk about excitement! Two of the Naso boys started picking teams, just like we all used to do on playgrounds around the US, with the Americans picked rst and the littlest of the kids chosen last. For the next hour, the group played a laughter lled game of baseball on the sloped ground with the waste creak running through the middle. Several of the women cooked fresh-plucked chicken and rice in a huge communal cooking pan over an open ame and a feast marked the conclusion of an incredible day. I still get goosebumps when I think about the day. Our boys felt they made just a little difference in our crazy world.

Two decades have passed since this inaugural surf trip to Panama, but the lessons and emotions have never been lost. Fast forward a decade and my now 28 year old called me in early February asking if I would be the photographer on another trip to Panama (our third). My hesitation lasted only as long as it took to look up at my wife and receive a bemused smile and a nod. On our 2022 trip, Zack, now uent, led two other newcomers both in the water and out. Nothing seems to phase the “kid,” and his smile when we round a point and see the next break is that same eager smile that he wore so often as a little grom.

A red dart frog, indigenous to Isla Bastimento

The Naso school where the children arrive by dugout

So, I suppose the best advice I can offer to a parent is to take your child, alone and without your spouse, on a solo trip. Be sure it is more than two days because something special starts to happen by the third day. Your role as “parent” and your son or daughter's role as “kid” dissolves, leaving you as just two buddies facing the world together as peers. Venture forth, learn from travel and make a lifetime of memories together! Then, take your wife to Napa!!!

• Derek Emge is a professional photographer who calls Coronado home. His images can be found at DerekEmgePhotography.com and on Instagram @DerekEmgePhotography

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