25 March 2020 by CXpress

25 March 2020

Published every Wednesday by CXpress 2006 (Pty) Ltd - PO Box 1449, Plettenberg Bay 6600 - 6 Park Lane, Plettenberg Bay - Tel: 044 533 1004 - Fax: 044 533 0852 Email: editor@cxpress.co.za / advertising@cxpress.co.za Web page: www.cxpress.co.za Printed by Group Editors

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NEWS & VIEWS

25 March 2020

Our Robberg Coastal Corridor now in the capable hands of homegrown head ranger Kei Heyns HE Robberg Coastal Corridor Protected Environment (RCCPE) - one of the first voluntary, private landowner protected-environment declarations in South Africa - is pleased to announce the appointment of Kei Heyns as new head ranger. As of March 1, Kei is responsible for managing the protected environment within Robberg Coastal Corridor (RCC), which links Robberg Nature Reserve to Garden Route National Park, and for engaging with all stakeholders within the RCC and surrounds. His remit includes the establishment of the Erica Trail - a multiday hiking trail that will traverse east to west along the dramatic coast from Robberg Peninsula to Knoetzie, to be modelled on the renowned Otter Trail that is administered by SANParks. Situated in the heart of the Cape Floral Kingdom on an exceptionally beautiful and pristine coastline within the newly-declared UNESCO Garden Route Biosphere Reserve, the RCC is a critical 18km ecological corridor that links a provincial nature reserve to a national park. Most importantly, the RCC hosts rare and threatened fynbos species endemic to the Cape Floral Kingdom. It is also one of the eco-corridors situated within the greater Eden to Addo Corridor Initiative. Preserving this narrow and highly-threatened corridor facilitates the migration of plants, animals and insects, and maintains key ecological processes, such as seed dispersal, pollination, nutrient recycling and predator-prey interaction, in the face of the

IN HIS ELEMENT: Plett native Kei Heyns is in charge of protecting the pristine and breathtakingly beautiful Robberg Coastal Corridor, while also developing the new Erica Trail twixt Plett and Knysna

vagaries of climate change. Originally from Plettenberg Bay, Kei is a trained nature conservationist and now the RCC’s first full-time conservation manager. Under the official title of head ranger, he is tasked to support the implementation of the RCCPE’s objectives and favourable conservation outcomes. Basically, for those interested in the natural world, preservation of the environment and specifically in protecting this unique coastal eco-corridor from development and alien plant infestation, Kei is your point of contact. Until recently, Kei was head ranger at Fransmanshoek Conservancy, where he worked for six years. Apart from his considerable conservation experience, he holds a BTech degree in Nature Conservation from the Nelson Mandela

University, George Campus, previously known as Saasveld. Commenting on his new appointment, Kei commented: “I am thrilled to be back within the community of my hometown where I will be able to put my energy and natural resource management skills to good use while engaging with the socio-ecological components and challenges of the RCCPE system. “I couldn’t wish for a better outdoor office, being situated in such a beautiful setting with excellent conservation potential.” Added RCCPE chairperson Andrew Hill: “Kei’s appointment is a huge step forward for us and will enable the conservation aims of the RCCPE to be realised. The consolidation and management of this conservation corridor are now in capable hands.” RCC founder Chris von

Christierson was one of the first landowners ever to declare his property a protectedenvironment. He said: “Kei’s appointment is indeed an important milestone in the conservation of this unique coastal eco-corridor. “The RCC is the last remaining lifeline to Robberg Peninsula. If it is severed by development, our generation’s legacy will be a Robberg devoid of the ecology and life we currently enjoy and take for granted. “We wish Kei well in his new position and believe he will make a meaningful contribution towards returning this irreplaceable coastline to the natural state our ancient ancestors inhabited for many tens of thousands of years.” Email Kei on rccpemanager@ gmail.com for details about the RCCPE or activities happening in the area.

NEWS & VIEWS

25 March 2020

CXPRESS

Plett may be pioneers in Covid-19 battle if fog-spray pans out As South Africa goes into lockdown from midnight tomorrow, towns like Plettenberg Bay and Knysna - which rely heavily on tourism to keep its economy afloat - have to battle not only the spread of the new coronavirus, but also face a massive economic knock that is likely to place many residents’ livelihoods on the line - YOLANDÉ STANDER reports EVERAL key stakeholders met on Monday at the Bitou council chambers to discuss the way forward, including the path for local tourism. Among these role-players is newly-appointed Plett Tourism chief executive Marius Venter, who has started his tenure under very trying circumstances as of March 1. Venter urged every resident to take the required precautions to stop the spread of the virus, which he believed would subsequently lessen the negative impact these measures would have on businesses and individuals.

“By far the best and cheapest option to reduce the impact on our town is to strictly follow the health guidelines. The more compliant we are, the less the impact of the virus will be on our town. “A diligent effort on the part of each of us and cooperation with all others who are seeking to implement recommended medical guidelines together with a small outlay on disinfectant products, soap and hand sanitizer, and we can get through this with minimum negative impact on both our health services and economy. “If we fail to do this, the

alternative does not bear thinking about and we are in for a tough time,” said Venter. With travel bans and the freezing of non-essential services by president Cyril Ramaphosa since last Sunday, the hospitality industry in Plett is likely to be worst hit. “We are engaging with not only our members, but pursuing every avenue to try and mitigate the impact of this pandemic on our businesses,” he said. Venter believes in taking a proactive approach to challenges and announced plans to embark on an environmental disinfection cam-

Knysna Municipality implements further Covid-19 measures CTING municipal manager Dr Michele Gratz said that in light of the everincreasing number of infections, the municipality has introduced additional measures to promote the concept of social distancing. “The basic definition of social distancing refers to a deliberate decrease in the physical space between people. To reduce visitors to municipal buildings we ask you to please make use of council’s e-services.

“Council at its special meeting on March 19 resolved to cancel all meetings, including IDP consultation and ward report-back meetings. All municipal halls, libraries, museums, sports facilities (including those used for practise sessions), braai areas and play parks were also closed last week until further notice. “In addition, we are also closing all beaches - Noetzie, Coney Glen, Green Hole, Bollard Bay, Brenton-on-

Sea, Buffels Bay and all Sedgefield beaches - with immediate effect. We will only flatten the infection curve if people adhere to calls to practice social distancing and stay at home.” For any questions or if you show symptoms of the coronavirus, call 0800 029 999 or the provincial hotline 021 928 4102. WhatsApp ‘Hi’ to 060 012 3456 or visit www.westerncape. gov.za/coronavirus for further details.

Premier Winde welcomes national lockdown ESTERN Cape premier Alan Winde on Monday night responded to the president’s announcement of a 21-day lockdown period in a bid to slow the spread of Covid-19 infections. On Monday afternoon, national Health minister Zweli Mkhize revealed that the Western Cape had recorded its 100th laboratory confirmed case of Covid-19. The breakdown by district is: Cape Town Metro 85 cases, Garden

Route eight cases, and Cape Winelands seven cases. “It is likely that there are people in our communities who have been infected, who are not yet showing symptoms and have not been tested. That is why the Western Cape Government is calling on all people to stay home,” said Winde. “These announcements are likely to cause a lot of anxiety but I want to reassure residents that we will be working closely with the National Government to ensure

our residents remain safe. “As the president indicated, shops will remain open so that people can access food and medications. There is no need to resort to panic buying. We have met with big retailers who have assured us of sufficient supplies.” The site www.westerncape. gov.za/coronavirus will be updated regularly, and click on www.westerncape.gov. za/department-of-health/ risk-assessment-form for a self-assessment tool if you suspect you’ve been infected.

paign on Saturday. This is a collaborative effort between Plett Tourism, Bitou Municipality and the Plett Fire Fund, and will involve professionals releasing a disinfection “fog” and spraying high risk areas. “This product has been used in other cities across the globe to fight the virus. It is an organic and safe product and could keep the

virus at bay for up to 90 days at a time,” Venter said. Should the plans pan out, Plettenberg Bay would be the first town in South Africa to go to such measures since the outbreak. He said that Medlife paramedic services have also partnered with Bitou and have made available an ambulance, geared to deal with coronavirus cases, and a

dedicated team to go out to those who need virus-related assistance and deal with issues remotely. “It is a challenging time, but history has taught me that we stand together when crisis strikes, and I have no doubt that this will be one of those moments.” Watch the CXPRESS website and Facebook page for further details.

CXPRESS

NEWS & VIEWS

25 March 2020

Garden Route leads the way in establishing Multi-Agency Command Centre ARDEN Route District Mu- Western Cape Government’s call Transport, Social Services and Edu- trict mayor Memory Booysen, “A decision was taken that no G nicipality (GRDM) last week to this end on all districts to ensure cation, Health, Safety and Security, adding his gratitude to munici- visitors should be allowed at established a Covid-19 Multi Agen- that various clusters share their and Communications. pal manager Monde Stratu for vulnerable sites such as old-age cy Command Centre (MACC) at its head office in George. The March 19 move followed

experiences closer to grassroots level. Clusters are categorised into stakeholder groups including

“We are one of the first districts to act proactively in ensuring that our clusters are up-and-running,” said dis-

his leadership and quick response to the pandemic. “Stratu meets with his senior management on a daily basis to discuss the organisation’s readiness and receives feedback from Disaster Management about the status of agencies and communities. “Disaster Management head Gerhard Otto has also acted swiftly in getting all the Garden Route stakeholders together and keeping them updated on provincial and national developments since the onset of Covid-19 in South Africa. A group for staff members has been created where awareness is filtered to all levels of employees, who are then tasked to communicate messages to contacts in their phone books. We also use Facebook and Twitter to share information,” said Booysen. Dr Terence Marshall of the Department of Health leads the Health Cluster and said during the first MACC gathering they were starting on phase two of responses for Covid-19. “Additional sites are being identified for testing and we are possibly also getting a mobile testing station.” He said they were already also “planning for phase three, which relates to largescale community transitions of the virus, and facilities for isolation”. One of the next important interventions that needed immediate attention, was the decongestion of public services.

homes, correctional services and hospitals,” Dr Marshall said. Appeal to businesses The Covid-19 MACC acknowledges the major challenges businesses are experiencing. Many are taking innovative steps to allow for social distancing, like ensuring their employees use no public transport and digitising more of their operations, but there is always more that can be done. All employers are urged to let employees work from home. Every business should develop a social distancing approach that means staff should not be forced to be in close proximity to each other. About 35 stakeholders were present at the first meeting - a concern due to social distancing. Consequently, it was requested that only one or two people per cluster form part of the Covid-19 MACC that will convene mornings from Monday to Friday. A best practice guide together with FAQs is being developed to assist businesses to stop the spread - visit www.westerncape. gov.za/coronavirus for details. Important numbers to save If you develop flu-like symptoms, do not panic; isolate yourself at home to limit contact with others. Call the national coronavirus hotline 0800 029 999, the provincial hotline 021 928 4102, or WhatsApp ‘Hi’ to 060 012 3456. Call your health practitioner for further advice. If unwell, stay home, except to get medical care as directed; do not go to work or public areas.

Global virus spread highlights importance of next 30 days for South Africa LETT resident Helen Mudge shared this information released recently under the #Coronavirus FlattenTheCurve banner. These figures show the importance for all of us to cooperate amid the coronavirus crisis. Weekly cases • New York - wk 1: 2, wk 2: 105, wk 3: 613, recorded on March 22: 16,887 • France - wk 1: 12, wk 2: 191, wk 3: 653, wk 4: 4,499, March 23: 16,018 • Iran - wk 1: 2, wk 2: 43, wk 3: 245, wk 4: 4,747, wk 5: 12,729, March 23: 21,638 • Italy - wk 1: 3, wk 2: 152, wk 3: 1,036, wk 4: 6,362, wk 5: 21,157, March 23: 59,138 • Spain - wk 1: 8, wk 3: 674, wk 4: 6,043, March 23: 29,909 • India - wk 1: 3, wk 2: 24, wk 3: 105, March 23: 396 • South Africa - wk 1: 13, wk 2: 116, March 23: 402 The next few weeks are crucial for South Africa. If we take adequate precautions and flatten the curve, then we can break the tide of the virus outbreak; alternatively we’ll have a big problem on our hands, especially for the elderly and large immunocompromised population. We are currently in Stage 3,

i.e. the virus spreads through social contacts and gatherings. This is the most critical stage, when the number of confirmed cases spreads exponentially every day (this happened in Italy between the last week of February and second week of March, from 300 to 10,000). If South Africans are not able to manage this stage over the next three to four weeks, then we could have confirmed cases not in the thousands but in the millions. This next month is crucial, which is why most events and public gatherings have been prohibited. Don’t cave to the travel bug compulsion just because schools are closed. Holidays will come next year, too, so why try your luck now, especially with children and the elderly? Birthday parties and weddings can wait. It’s foolish bravado to think nothing will happen to you - many people may die because of your actions. The next 30 days will be the most crucial in the medical history of South Africa. Take all precautions while at home and when you absolutely have to venture outside for essential purposes. And please note: Precaution is NOT panic. • Read ‘Explained: Four stages of an outbreak’ at www.cxpress.co.za.

NEWS & VIEWS

25 March 2020

CXPRESS

Controlled nature of school environment may have been less worrisome for absent parents of free-running township children Bitou township parents are worried about the risk of their children being exposed to folk infected with the new coronavirus during the prolonged school holidays, and this concern will not necessarily abate when the national lockdown kicks in tomorrow at midnight - LUDUMO TEDE reports ARENTS in the townships find monitoring their children’s hygiene hard to control, as they say the only way kids in the townships play is outdoors with their peers. Although they fear transmission of the virus, it’s impossible to quarantine their children, because parents are mostly at work during the day. The declaration of the state of disaster by president Cyril Ramaphosa, following growing numbers of those infected with the virus

in South Africa, also called for schools to be closed early and the holiday prolonged, as part of the safety measures to fight Covid-19. Although this is seen as a safety measure to curb the spread of the virus, especially among the young ones, parents in the townships find it increasingly hard to ensure their kids’ safety The World Health Organisation dubbed Covid-19 an ‘enemy to humanity’. And fear has become part of people’s everyday

lives, as the spread of the virus is not showing any signs of abating. Parents in the townships believe their kids are still as exposed - perhaps even more so than within the controlled environment of their schools. “For example, when I come back from work I don’t know where they are playing. And their games involve physical contact. My child knows about the coronavirus and that he should not be sharing things like sweets, like they

normally do. “But how do I know if he does or doesn’t, because he’s mostly outside with his friends, and kids are kids. The most challenging part is that I have to be at work. I’m not there to check on him during the day. I have to work to feed us both,” explains Belinda Mhlwatika, a health caregiver and

viduals who work tirelessly to curb child abuse. In conjunction with the Mungo Annual Factory Sale, which ran from February 28 to March 2, Mungo opened its tent for three hours for an exclusive sale JOINT FORCE: The strength of the Mungo brand - manufacturers of one of Plett’s finest range of export products and the conviction of Janet Harding’s Green Hearts make for a formidable local dynamic - pictured with Janet, at left, and her Green Hearts colleagues is Mungo administrative manager Caroline Vedder, second from left - Photo: Georgina Selander

preview. Attendees were able to buy earlybird tickets - of which full proceeds were donated to the Green Hearts. Comprising a dedicated group of Plett-based individuals, the Green Hearts work passionately to create awareness around the safety and rights of children. They are strongly united as the voice against child abuse, and to change laws for the adequate protection of our children. The pre-sale strongly aligns with the values of Mungo’s Corporate Social Responsibility initiative, MOVE, through which they donate 1% of their annual turnover to projects and causes that support the environmental and social development of the Plett community. For more info on the Green Hearts, how to assist or how you can contribute, contact Janet on 082 653 9275.

not to share his bike, but I doubt he will stick to that rule, because I’m not there to watch him on the streets,” says Khayakazi Bhavuma, the self-employed mother of an eight-year-old KwaNokuthula Primary boy. At the time of writing, no coronavirus cases had been confirmed in any of the townships around Plett.

Garden Route

Plett’s most popular annual sale raises cash for a great cause that benefits us all N Thursday February 27, Mungo held its annual pre-sale fundraising event. Through the sale of 30 pre-bought tickets, Mungo was able to raise R15,000 for the Green Hearts - a committed group of indi-

single mother of a 12-yearold Grade 7 pupil. However, the parents say they are trying to teach their children about observing the stringent new hygiene regime. “I tell my son to wash his hands every now and then he’s getting it now because I see him doing it, especially before eating. I can tell him

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CXPRESS

BUSINESS

25 March 2020

UIF to the rescue as virus threatens lay-offs Jan Truter

OST businesses are under exceptional strain as a consequence of the severe measures implemented due to Covid-19 having been declared a national disaster, and are resorting to emergency measures. However, a fairly recent amendment to the Unemployment Insurance Act of 2001 can bring much-needed relief. Two obvious alternatives to retrenchment is for employees to work short time or to be laid off

temporarily without pay. How can this be achieved? Short time and lay-off Some Bargaining Council Agreements make provision for short time and/ or temporary lay-off, and some employment contracts have built-in provisions in this regard. In the absence of such provisions, employers may not impose these measures unilaterally it will have to be agreed upon. If no agreement is reached, employers may have to follow the retrenchment process as a last resort.

UIF relief In January 2018, the president assented to several amendments to the Unemployment Insurance Act of 2001, including the insertion of the following provision to section 12 of the Act: “A contributor employed in any sector who loses his or her income due to reduced working time, despite being employed, is entitled to benefits if the contributor’s total income falls below the benefit level that the contributor would have received if he or she had become wholly

unemployed, subject to that contributor having enough credits.” It would seem that this caters for precisely the type of situation faced by employees who work short time or are temporarily laid off. Although it does not seem that the amendments were actually promulgated, the relevant forms are available from the Department of Labour and such claims will be processed. Email info@labourwise. co.za for assistance with short time or temporary lay-off agreements.

Working from home? Here’s how… OVID-19 has meant that thousands of South Africans will be working from home in the near future. Gumtree South Africa Customer Service supervisor Vivi Ho Quang leads a homeshoring team that exclusively works from home. Homeshoring is an alternative to offshoring, where contact teams operate from their houses to cut costs. Ho Quang has some advice for South Africans that are setting up home offices for the first time. “It is important to keep your work and leisure space separate. If you don’t, you will find yourself working during your personal time - and vice versa. A small desk

in the corner of a spare bedroom is perfect. “Physical boundaries also help you if you have small children - they need to be taught that when the office door is closed, it means you’re working and can’t be disturbed. “Mentally, it’s also important to don your office clothes; staying in your pyjamas is tempting, but dressing up sets the mood for the day.” In terms of equipment, you don’t need much more than good lighting, a chair that promotes good posture, and great Wi-Fi. If you are going to use the phone a lot, it’s worth investing in a headset or noisecancelling headphones. The biggest concern is loadshedding, which

can disrupt connectivity - including cell towers. “You can buy an entry level UPS device online from R650. That will keep your Wi-Fi up and running. I would also recommend surge protectors to protect your PC and phones from sudden outages, and a power bank to keep your cellphone charged. Failing that, make sure to charge your laptop and phone overnight,” says Ho Quang. She adds that it’s important to create good habits early on. “Get into a routine, so set your alarm clock, have breakfast, dress, go to the gym, shower and log on. By ritualising your work schedule, it feels natural and you

start doing it automatically. Use tools like Slack and WhatsApp to check in with team members and managers daily.” You can also use technology to avoid distractions. “Unless it’s part of your job, download block-out apps that won’t allow you to access social media during working hours. Noisecancelling headphones can help. You can even play ambient office noise over Spotify to set the mood! “Don’t mix work and leisure activities - don’t keep games on a work laptop, for example. It takes a while to get used to, but once you are in the habit, you’ll see the benefits of working from home,” she says.

Rate cut welcomed as vital stimulus for economy and property during global pandemic HE decision by the Reserve Bank’s Monetary Policy Committee to cut the repo rate by 100 basis points to 5.25% (from 6.25%) reducing the mortgage rate to 8.75% (from 9.75%) is a welcome stimulus for the economy and property market, says Seeff Property Group chairman Samuel Seeff. “This cut will help when the recovery starts,” says Seeff. “It takes the interest rate down to levels last seen in the 2012/3 period and is at one of the lowest levels in decades. “It is in keeping with global developments given that the world economy is now in recession and

potentially facing a similar situation to the 2008 global financial crisis.” Central banks across the world have responded with aggressive rate cuts and the US Fed has just provided a second emergency cut, bringing rates down to near-zero, and launching an aggressive economic stimulus package. “Given that SA does not have the reserves to match any such stimulus and is fiscally under massive pressure, it is necessary for the Reserve Bank to come to the aid of the economy and provide assistance to South Africans.” Seeff says that the Bank’s stance over the last year

has been far too hawkish, with only two 25 basic point cuts despite there being ample reasons and calls for more aggressive cuts to boost the economy. “This cut will provide much needed relief for households and small businesses and aid those with debt and home loans. It will provide a vital boost for the property market. “Contrary to expectation, the market has been active this year and people have continued buying, but we will need to wait and see what effect the crisis will have.” Seeff says this year has seen more commitment from buyers looking to

take advantage of what is the best buyer’s market in a decade, while sellers who had been holding out are now showing some urgency. “The rate cut will provide additional stimulus for buyers who might still be sitting on the fence to take advantage of the favourable buying conditions. “In addition to the affordability boost, the savings will put extra money into buyers’ pockets that can assist with transfer duty and costs, which in turn will result in more transfer duty revenue for government and increased economic activity,” he concludes.

PROMOTION

25 March 2020

CXPRESS

INTERVAL

25 March 2020

Pun intended • My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving. • I fear my stuttering brother may never finish his prison sentence. • I got my girlfriend a ‘get better soon’ card. She’s not ill or anything, but she could definitely get better. • I Googled ‘how to start a wildfire’. I got 48,500 matches. • I got very lonely lately, so I bought some shares. It’s much nicer having some company. • Never date cross-eyed people. They might be seeing somebody on the side. • I told my girlfriend to come with me to the gym. Then I stood her up. Hopefully, she’ll realise the two of us are not going to work out.

• Vegans believe meat eaters and butchers are gross. But those who sell you fruits and vegetables are grocer. • Care to seduce a large woman? Piece of cake. • My boss yelled at me the other day: “You’ve got to be the worst train driver in history. How many trains did you derail last year?” Me: “I can’t say for sure, it’s so hard to keep track!” • I dig, you dig, she digs, we dig, he digs… the poem may not be beautiful, but it’s certainly very deep. • I asked my boss if I could come to work a little late today. He said: “Dream on.” I really thought that was very nice of him. • Two egotists started a fight. It was an I for an I.

• A man in a butcher shop: “I would like bull testicles please.” Butcher: “Me too.” • I wanted to tell you a joke about leeches. But I won’t - they all suck. • They’re building a restaurant on Mars now. They say the food will be delicious, but they’re worried about a lack of atmosphere. • Atoms are untrustworthy little critters. They make up everything! • So: 37 consonants, 25 vowels, a question mark, and a comma went to

court. They will be sentenced next Friday. • Somebody stole all my lamps. I couldn’t be more delighted. • The future, the present, and the past walked into a shady bar. Things got tense. • How can you kill a whole circus? You’ve got to go for the juggler. • What do you call a chicken that’s scared of sharks? A chicken. • I can’t stand it when people repeat themselves pointlessly. I just can’t stand it!

It’s for your own good. You have to stop touching your face.

Lucky hand man asks a fortune teller: “Are you any good at palmistry?” “Well, not exactly. But, the other day I did look at a lady’s hand, and one glance told me she

was going to be lucky,” the fortune teller says. “Why, how’s that?” the man asks. “Well, it had four aces in it,” the fortune teller replies.

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E F F E R V E S C E N T

SOCIAL SCENE

25 March 2020

CXPRESS

People, places & events

AAH, WHAT A WONDERFUL WEDDING! Talia Day and Shannon Halderman were blessed in wedded union to the tune of The Imperial March, in a hand-fasting ceremony in the forest surrounding Sedgefield on Saturday February 29. We wish them the best of matrimonial bliss and ‘Love in a time of Covid-19’. - Photos: Hylton Herd Photography

STAY SAFE AND GORGEOUS: The team at Plett’s Lash Care International Lash and Brow Bar would like to thank all clients for their support during the past month. They look forward to welcoming you back when our world returns to normal once again. Turn to page 9 of the March 4 edition at www.cxpress.co.za for news on the Lash Bar’s launch, when guests were treated to demos, snacks and bubbly, and see the advert on this page for contact details. BLESSED WITH THEIR VERY OWN BOWLS GEAR: The Rotary Club of Plettenberg Bay sponsored the talented young bowlers of Wittedrift High School with new equipment and much-needed bowls to the value of more than R20,000. Since this recent blessing, the Wittedrift High club signed up 12 new players - and now they don’t have to borrow bowls from schools in George any longer, according to coach Willie Lane. Pictured during the handover are, from left, Neville Henley of Plett Rotary, Chayren Wildeman, Eden Girls Masters champion Chandre Paulse, Eden Boys Junior Masters champion Ethan Andrews, and a particularly proud Mr Lane. - LM Dunn

CXPRESS

25 March 2020

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CLASSIFIEDS

ON THE SOAPBOX

25 March 2020

Letters to the Editor

Email: editor@cxpress.co.za - Fax: 044 533 0852 - PO Box 1449, Plett 6600

Oom Schalk explains why mampoer is not what it used to be…

OWNING THE STAGE: Actor David Muller performing Heathcote Williams’ ‘Sacred Elephant’ in a packed St Peter’s hall

Please accept my apologies: On March 14, I performed in the quaint and intimate hall of St Peter’s Church in Plettenberg Bay. Fortunately, it was the night before our dear president made the ruling that no more than 100 people could get together. What with the good women who made tea, coffee, carrot cake and more for the patrons, we were well over 100 pax. But there is something else that needs addressing. That evening during the last Bosman story, ‘Willem Prinsloo’s Peach Brandy’, as Oom Schalk Lourens I hand out a few tots of said brandy (viz: mampoer) to the front row, warning the guests that they drink this at their own risk.

It is normally over 50% alcohol - strong enough to run your motor vehicle. Because I would not perform up to scratch if I drank any amount of this alcohol, I always fill my tot glass with water, for it’s the same colour. This is my first confession, which would not have come about, had not the second confession been necessary. I have two children, one aged 22 and the other 16, and a beautiful partner, the mother of these two beloved kids. After the show, Stuart Palmer - who runs Lunchbox Theatre, and for whom I was fundraising - asked to share some of the mampoer. This time I drank some.

Who spiked Plett public park with such malicious intent? On Tuesday March 3, I drove into the park alongside Great Basses Road as I have done hundreds of times before, to allow my dog and myself some exercise, enjoy the view, and appreciate the sight of Brunsvigia now beautifully in bloom. Imagine my horror when my car was suddenly pinned to a halt by several wicked metal spikes that had been carefully dug deep into the ground. It cost me R650 to call out the breakdown people, who winched me up and managed to dislodge the spikes. While my car was dangling from a metal rope, a passing car stopped to watch. I commented to the gentleman: “Look what someone has done!” His reply was to the effect that this was in order, because cars had been driving all over the park, destroying the flowers in bloom. Well, sir, I can only think it must have been you who planted those spikes. Two wrongs do not make a right. If you wanted that entrance closed, it should have been done through the correct channels. Mr Basson from Bitou Municipality knew noth-

ing about it. He said if they were involved, some kind of notice warning people would have been put in place. But those spikes were hidden. They blended in with the colour of the ground, so it was impossible to see them. It was a vindictive, unkind action. I am terribly disappointed that a person who purports to love beauty (i.e. concern for the Brunsvigia) would stoop so low as to do a thing like this. One of the wonderful things about Plettenberg Bay is its people. You have let them down. Ann Thomas, Plett (It was truly disconcerting to hear Ann’s story firsthand when she visited the CXPRESS office to report the incident and show the offending metal bars, as well as the damage to her car incurred in the process of getting stuck and then released. She expressed her gratitude to the team at Autech Plett for their assistance at no charge - during this terrible ordeal. We appeal to anyone with information about the person responsible for interring these vicious spikes to email editor @cxpress.co.za - Eds.)

CAKE CREW: David Hall-Green with the gracious ladies who served guests with tea and coffee and scrumptious carrot cake at interval

It tasted as if it had been watered down for it was bland, to say the least. And this is where my apology comes in. I am sorry for those who drank this watered down mampoer; you were supposed to taste the real thing. I don’t know what to say - how can I make it up to you all? I WhatsApped my family immediately to asked who watered down my mampoer. Unfortunately, because of predictive text they read: Who watered down my manpower? Luckily I have children who know when to own up and one of them did, feeling very remorseful about it. As punishment we have agreed to spend the next few weeks doing

four hours per week of pencil sketching. I am now trying to work out just how many editors I need to write to, asking them to let their readers know that they were conned into believing Oom Schalk was giving them the real thing. When did my child steal the peach brandy? Either way, a big thank you is due to Stuart and all the good folk who turned up to enjoy both the Sacred Elephant and delightful Herman Charles Bosman stories. And thank you to the Palmers for hosting me in their gorgeous and peaceful home. I hope to come back and tell some more of Bosman’s great stories. David Muller, Cape Town

WICKED SPIKES EXPOSED: The diminutive Ann Thomas, 80, hauled four heavy iron bars to the CXPRESS office for us to photograph; she points out that only the top third or so of each bar protruded the surface, making it impossible to spot them at the entrance to the park alongside Great Basses Road

Tribute to the Boer Referring to Rev Johnson’s letter in your March 18 edition [read it on page 11 at www.cxpress.co.za], here are some more classic quotes of famous military men regarding the Boers: “Give me 20 divisions American soldiers and I will breach Europe. Give me 15 consisting of Englishmen, and I will advance to the borders of Berlin. “Give me two divisions of those marvellous fighting Boers and I will remove Germany from the face of the earth.” - Field marshal Bernard L Montgomery, commander of the Allied

forces during WWII. “The Americans fight for a free world, the English mostly for honour and glory and medals, the French and Canadians decide too late that they have to participate. “The Italians are too scared to fight; the Russians have no choice. The Germans fight for the Fatherland. The Boers? Those sons of bitches fight for the hell of it.” American general George ‘Guts and Glory’ Patton. Those old toppies were truly feared in their day! Niel Pretorius, London

CXPRESS

25 March 2020

SPORT & ADVENTURE

Gary Kirsten launches online cricket programme S South Africans are dealing with the shock of an immediate future devoid of live sporting action, in light of major and minor tournaments around the globe having been canned or postponed to later dates, Proteas legend Gary Kirsten has been using the isolation enforced by the corona pandemic rather productively.

Says Kirsten: “Anyone looking to advance their cricket coach education, or coaches looking for a credible cricket coaching accreditation, are now able to do so simply and timeously from the comfort of their own homes.” The newly-launched online programme powered by Kirsten is called CoachEd and

goes live on Thursday April 2. “The game of cricket has changed and this has impacted how we coach,” explained Kirsten, legendary South African batsman and coach of both the South African and Indian national sides. “We wanted to develop a coach education programme that not only addressed these changes in real-time, but also empowered coaches of all levels with the necessary skills and knowledge to advance both themselves, and the game.” Kirsten is passionate about the accessi-

bility of quality, structured cricketing resources in an effort to improve the standard of cricket coaching internationally. “We have engaged with many coaches around the world and found that there is commonality in barriers to upgrading cricket coaching skills. We wanted to design a holistic, scalable platform that addresses this, providing opportunities to upskill in any cricketing areas and levels,” Kirsten concludes. Visit www.coachedcricket.com for additional information.

Plett fighters sweep clean at SWD

A group of 21 kickboxers from the Plettenberg Bay dojo brought home 31 gold medals, seven silver, four bronze, and two Junior Grand Champ titles after participating at the ISKA SWD championships held in George on the weekend of March 14 & 15, i.e. hours before the ban on sporting events countrywide was instated. Seen here sporting their bling from left in the front row are Jake Naude, Zian Rheeder, Keegan Hill, Dennis Weerman, Eden Bleeker and Enzo Rheeder; in the middle row are Wian Venter, Liam Julyan, Heather Anderson, Shona Gordon, Lusanda Caw and Ella van Huyssteen, with Aiden Trahms, Amos Mann, George Poulman, Stefan Venter, Fourie Engelbrecht, sensei Gee Bleeker, Kieran Anderson and Lojza Pisonic at back (absent: Nabil Moussa). Pictured at far left and right respectively, Aiden and Lojza show off their Junior Black Belt Grand Champ trophies. In another recent competition, SAKA Battle of the Karoo held in Oudtshoorn on February 29, sensei Gee walked off with the Black Belt Open title and a gold medal for Points Fighting, while diminutive Shona, pictured with Gee below, won gold for Points Fighting and silver for Kicklight. Congratulations to y’all!