31 January 2018 by CXpress

31 January 2018

Published every Wednesday by CXpress 2006 (Pty) Ltd - PO Box 1449, Plettenberg Bay 6600 - 6 Park Lane, Plettenberg Bay - Tel: 044 533 1004 - Fax: 044 533 0852 Email: editor@cxpress.co.za / advertising@cxpress.co.za Web page: www.cxpress.co.za Printed by Group Editors

Incoming!

Murder at Plett security estate p3

Help PlettAid to care for us all p5

Adventure Addicts in Knysna p12

Photo: Candice Ludick

Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters wowed one and all when mingling with members of the huge crowd who welcomed this recently-crowned Miss Universe back to her hometown of Sedgefield on Sunday. Hundreds of people lined up to have their pictures taken with and autographs signed by the truly dashing Demi-Leigh. Turn to page 7 for more images of the happy occasion.

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NEWS & VIEWS

31 January 2018

Disbelief prevails after Thandazwa’s untimely death Last Saturday KHAYA MBESI attended the memorial service of a Bitou youngster who saw no light at the end of life’s tunnel after failing Grade 11 HANDAZWA Mnyepha, 20, was buried last Saturday at home in KwaNokuthula; devastated by her poor progress at school, she decided to take her own life on January 17. Last year Thandazwa repeated Grade 11 and when she realised that she didn’t pull through again at the start of this school year, she saw no alternative to suicide. Her friends at Murray High are still in a state of shock. The school conducted a memorial service last Wednesday to pay tribute to Thandazwa. One of her teachers, Nikile Mayila, said: “As far as I’m

concerned she was a good kid. She was here when we opened the school on January 17. We saw her but we had no idea what was on her mind. She was just a normal youngster. “We had a long talk during assembly on the first day of school. We then called the children to their classrooms. All those who were not called knew they were not entitled to move on to the next grade. If you are not called, you immediately know you did not succeed. “When the students left the school as a group, she was among those learners. The next

BEREFT: Murray High students Zenande Nyabaza, left, and Siphamandla Tungani mourn their friend who leapt to her death from Groot River Bridge two weeks ago - turn to page 3 of the January 24 edition at www.cxpress.co.za for the initial report - Photo: Khaya Mbesi

SAD END: A recent selfie of the language-friendly Thandazwa

thing we heard she had committed suicide. We are numbed by the news. We encourage all our learners to work hard they are at school to learn. We encourage them to actively participate in other activities, too, but our priority is school work. “The police reported the incident, but we didn’t know it was Thandazwa until we got a full report. We couldn’t believe it - the whole school is traumatised. We could not start the year on the positive note we were planning. Our spirits are down but we will continue with

the necessary work.” School mate Siphamandla Tungani described his departed friend as a fierce orator. “She was always confident during our debating competitions. She had the power of the tongue and languages - she was so strong. “During our last debate with Knysna High School, many others did not make it, but Thandazwa held on until we were through to the next round. She was standing up for her school against many odds. We feel the poorer for having lost her. “I suppose God will raise other kids. He does not take without replacing.” Thandazwa’s closest friend, 18-year-old Zenande Nyabaza, said: “I feel lonely without her. She was my best friend. She mentioned that she may take her life if she failed. I never took it seriously - I simply did not believe her.” Thandazwa’s teacher Khoboka Veliswa had nothing to say to CXPRESS, because of her grief and devastation. Likewise, the family reserved comment because her death had left them in a speechless state of shock.

Sharp wit of Bitou’s ‘plus bon vivant’ now forever silent XPRESS was saddened to learn that one of our favourite contributors - mostly in the form of letters “to my dear lady editors” - had passed away earlier this month. Crags-based artist and architect Martin Rattray has over the years entertained us with razor-sharp wit, and his passing leaves a huge gap in local social circles and the South African arts community. His legacy, however, remains in

the form of icons such as the magnificent Pavilion on Kurland Estate, and a vast oeuvre of paintings. A memorial service for Martin will be held at St Peter’s Anglican Church in Plett on Thursday February 8 at 11am. Martin’s parents, Peter and Gill Rattray, will be in attendance. When CXPRESS shared our sympathies with the Rattrays, resident in Swellendam for the past 16 years, Peter reminisced

about the bright young man Martin had always been. “I found his matric certificate, which paints the picture of an excellent student of St Albans College in Pretoria. We’ve always recognised Martin as an exceptionally clever person,” he said, adding that this prized document would be in his pocket when he addresses those in attendance at next Thursday’s service. RIP, Martin Rattray.

MARTIN RATTRAY (8 March 1962 - 13 January 2018): Plett artist David Thorpe, now based in Cape Town, painted this gallant oil on canvas of Martin circa 2000

NEWS & VIEWS

31 January 2018

‘This drought is not going anywhere’ - Fayruz Dharsey of Environmental Affairs Candice Ludick

number of representatives of the local business community attended a ‘Water Dialogue’ at Knysna council chambers on Friday January 26. Municipal manager Kam Chetty opened the conversation by saying that it was “time to acknowledge we are in a crisis - it won’t help to appropriate blame”. Fayruz Dharsey of the Department of Environmental Affairs and Tourism clarified the importance of ascertaining the economic impact of the water crisis by means of gathering quantitative and qualitative information. Her aim is to establish what business needs versus what government can offer. According to information presented in her report on the Western Cape’s drought status, Knysna was classified as “high risk” - although the majority of data in the report was not specifically applicable to Knysna.

Dharsey explained that various factors influenced if and when Day Zero (the day that the taps run dry) would come to pass, including rainfall, new sources, temperature, wind, and consumption. Faced with the worst drought in living memory, the only thing we can control is our consumption. “This drought is not going anywhere,” she said. Deputy town engineer (water and sewer) Rhoydon Parry pointed out that a “one size fits all” approach was not appropriate for Knysna - a town that has survived various droughts since 1977 and has had water restrictions in place since 2006. Unlike the Cape Town region, Knysna’s water supply comes predominantly from rivers and not dams. Parry admitted that Knysna’s 50-year-old water reticulation system was no longer functional, which had resulted in 983 pipe bursts in the CBD since 2017 - and counting.

Various upgrading and replacement projects are currently underway. The municipality was unable to answer the question as to how it could take one and a half hours to shut off the water at a burst pipe site, other than saying that perhaps someone was not following the correct protocol. Knysna mayor Eleanor Bouw-Spies suggested that all new RDP homes be equipped with rainwater tanks and that more be done toward alien vegetation eradication, thus alleviating pressure on an already compromised system. She acknowledged that the response time to burst pipes left some room for improvement. Bouw-Spies said that she wished for the municipality to become “champions of change” who would lead by example. Chetty closed the meeting by expressing hope that this initial Water Dialogue hailed the creation of a space for business and government to work together.

Cape companies should now prepare for Day Zero HE reality of Day Zero is frightening and to get through it, Capetonians will have to pull together like never before. More importantly, if businesses in Cape Town are going to survive 2018, they will have to implement solutions that will enable staff to work remotely as a team. The World Wildlife Fund (WWF) says Day Zero is not a single day; the reality is that the city will be without water in the taps for likely between three and six months. Even when there is water, rebooting the system may take time

and possibly be fraught with difficulty considering that no one has ever had to do it before. The report also states all businesses that don’t have an independent and proven safe supply of drinking and sanitation water will have to close. Schools without an independent supply of drinking and sanitation water will also have to shut their doors. Alto Africa CTO Oliver Potgieter says no major modern city in the world has ever run out of water and no one really knows what the social conse-

quences may be. “Day Zero is coming and there is very little anyone can do to avoid it.” “Businesses must ensure their people are able to work from anywhere. Alto Africa is passionate about its home city Cape Town and wants to support local businesses in this time of need. So, we are waiving all set-up and migration fees for local businesses that are moving to the cloud in preparation for Day Zero,” he adds. Visit www.altoafrica.com for more information and see the letter on page 11.

CXPRESS

Plett murder victim’s burnt-out car found in Knysna; killer still at large Plettenberg Bay has been rocked by the brutal murder of a resident in one of its upmarket country estates - YOLANDÉ STANDER reports homeowner in Schoongezicht Country Estate in Piesang Valley Road was found dead in her home on Monday morning. Although information is still vague at this stage and an official police report had not been released by going to press, it is believed that the victim’s home was ransacked and her vehicle stolen. The vehicle was allegedly found on Monday evening in Nekkies in Knysna,

‘PERSON OF INTEREST’: This photo, taken by a security camera at the estate’s entrance, shows the man now sought by police leaving in the murder victim’s vehicle at 5:50am on January 29

where it had been set alight. A photo of a “person of interest” has since been circulated. If you have any

information on the man’s whereabouts, contact KwaNokuthula police on 044 533 2145.

CXPRESS

NEWS & VIEWS

31 January 2018

Transport battle boils over, leaving Phakamisani kids at home while parents catch the bus Words & photo: Khaya Mbesi

war between Bitou-based Jansen and Pika’s transport services forced parents of Phakamisani Primary School learners to stop their kids from attending school last week. A group of parents from Qolweni and Bossiesgif jumped on the buses to address the protracted transport problem. When they arrived at school, Phakamisani principal Michael Spies said he could not fix the problem alone and that he would require some days to sort it out. The parents then proceeded to take the bus to Knysna to meet with sectoral Education department head Suzette de Villiers When finding her out of office, scores of parents filled up the departmental offices until she could meet with them. Parents have been complaining about bad bus conditions - such as leaking water, loose wires, harsh driving, and abusive language used by Pika bus drivers - since last year. The delegation explained these issues to De Villiers at her office, resulting in a meeting in KwaNokuthula with the principal and school governing body chairperson

TRADING PLACES: Parents of Phakamisani Primary students were so fed up with the situation between two Bitou bus companies that they took their children’s seats last week and waited for an Education department representative in Knysna until the matter was addressed

Charles Bokuva. The long meeting at Phakamisani Primary ended with an undertaking by De Villiers that a meeting would be scheduled with Jansen and Pika transport services to find a solution.

“If they cannot agree to share the contract, we will get our officials to monitor Pika busses every morning until the contract ends. This frustrating situation was caused by the contract signed by both the school governing body (SGB) and the prin-

BELANGRIKE KENNISGEWING UITNODIGING OM LEDE VIR RADE & KOMITEES VIR GESONDHEIDSFASILITEITE TE BENOEM Hiermee nooi die Provinsiale Minister van Gesondheid gemeenskapsliggame of persone uit om individue te benoem om in die Rade en/of Komitees van die gesondheidsfasiliteite te dien ooreenkomstig die Wes-Kaapse Wet op Rade en Komitees vir Gesondheidsfasiliteite, 2016 (Wet 4 van 2016). Die Provinsiale Minister moet ooreenkomstig artikel 5, 6 en 7 van die Wet lede in ’n Gesondheidsfasiliteitsraad en -Komitee aanstel. Benoemings word dus vir die volgende gesondheidsfasiliteite versoek: • Hornlee / Knysna Dorp-groep • Knysna-gemeenskapsdagsentrum • Khayelethu-kliniek • Keurhoek-kliniek • Sedgefield • New Horizon / Plettenbergbaai-groep • Kwanokuthula-gemeenskapsdagsentrum • Crags-kliniek • Kranshoek-kliniek Volgens artikel 7 van die Wet, sal benoemdes aan die volgende benoembaarheidskriteria moet voldoen: (a) ’n Suid-Afrikaanse burger wees; (b) ouer as 18 jaar wees; (c) nie ’n ongerehabiliteerde insolvent wees nie; (d) nie, te eniger tyd, skuldig bevind gewees het nie aan; (i) ’n oortreding waarvoor hy of sy tot gevangenisstraf sonder die keuse van ’n boete gevonnis is; of (ii) diefstal, bedrog, vervalsing, die in omloop bring van ’n vervalste dokument, meineed, enige misdryf ingevolge die Wet op die Voorkoming en Bestryding van Korrupte Bedrywighede, 2004 (Wet 12 van 2004), of enige misdryf waarvan oneerlikheid ’n element is, hetsy in die Republiek of elders indien die optrede wat die oortreding uitmaak ’n oortreding in die Republiek sal wees; (e) toewyding tot gemeenskapsdiens toon; (f) steun vir die missie en waardes van die betrokke gesondheidsfasiliteit toon; en (g) ’n hoë vlak van persoonlike integriteit en eerlikheid toon. Benoemings moet die volgende inligting insluit: 1. Besonderhede van die organisasie of persoon wat die benoeming maak wat hul naam, adres en handtekening moet insluit; 2. Die naam van die gesondheidsfasiliteit waarvoor die benoeming gemaak word; 3. Die volle naam en adres van die benoemde; 4. ’n Ondertekende afskrif van die benoemde se curriculum vitae; 5. Die motivering vir die oorweging van die benoemde as ’n geskikte lid van die Raad of Komitee; 6. ’n Verklaring deur die benoemde van sy of haar bereidwilligheid om ’n lid van die Raad of Komitee te wees. 7. Buiten die bogenoemde, ingevolge artikel 5 en 6 van die Wet, moet die volgende inligting die benoemings vergesel: a. Die volle naam en adres van die liggaam wat die individu benoem en ’n afskrif van die grondwet van die liggaam of ’n ander stigtingsdokument; b. ’n Aanduiding van of die benoemde ’n lid van die liggaam is wat die benoeming maak en, indien wel, die lengte van die benoemde se lidmaatskap, en indien die benoemde nie ’n lid is nie, hoekom die liggaam daardie persoon benoem. Persone of liggame wat benoemings maak asook benoemdes moet asseblief op die volgende let: • Die Provinsiale Minister van Gesondheid sal lede van die Rade en Komitees aanstel. • Die posisie van ’n lid is vrywillig met geen besoldiging daaraan verbonde nie. • Lede kan egter vergoed word vir sekere reis- en verblyfonkoste wat aangegaan is. Kontakpersoon: Mnr. Y Kleynhans, Kontaknommer(s): 044 803 2776/2700, e-pos-adres: Yusuf.Kleynhans@westerncape.gov.za Benoemings moet gerig word aan die persoon wat hierbo geïdentifiseer word en by die naaste gesondheidsfasiliteit afgelewer word of: Aandag: Dr. E du Plooy, Knysna/Bitou-subdistrik, Knysna-hospitaal, Hoofstraat, Knysna 6570. Aandag: Dr. E du Plooy, Knysna/Bitou-subdistrik, Knysna-hospitaal, Privaat Sak X015, Knysna 6570. Die sluitingsdatum vir alle benoemings is 28 Februarie 2018. Afskrifte van die Wes-Kaapse Wet op Rade en Komitees vir Gesondheidsfasiliteite, 2016 (Wet 4 van 2016) is verkrygbaar by die geïdentifiseerde kontakpersoon hierbo. Vir meer inligting, besoek gerus ons webwerf www.westerncape.gov.za/dept/health

cipal. Pika has been paid by the department for his term,” De Villiers said. Parent Hazel Nongutha complained that Jansen was not being paid a single cent for picking up kids at Qolweni and Bossiesgif. De Villiers asked the parents not to interfere with the transport meeting, saying that they would get a report from the principal. However, many parents refused dealing with principal Spies, saying that they had lost faith in him. Others called on him to resign for letting the department down. De Villiers promised that a senior official in attendance would relate the outcome of the meeting. After the crusade started at 8am, the meeting finally broke up after 2pm; by Friday February 26, it was resolved that Jansen buses would collect kids from Qolweni and Bossiesgif, while Pika would pick up students in Pine Trees as of Monday the 29th. The Education department had also reiterated its commitment to investigating all accusations made by parents to the principal and SGB.

Seismic survey: 24 hours left to object Tomorrow is D-Day for anyone who intends to oppose the 3D seismic oil and gas prospecting survey about to be carried out along the Southern Cape coast after environmental authorisation was granted earlier this month YOLANDÉ STANDER reports EPUTY director-general for mineral regulation Seipati Syvia Dhlamini granted environmental authorisation to Sungu Sungu Oil to undertake the survey on January 12, subject to compliance with several conditions, including a 20-day period for appeal. The appeal process comes to an end on Thursday February 1. The survey is set to involve the use of airguns that shoot loud blasts of compressed air through the water and into the seabed. The planned project is part of an application by Sungu Sungu Oil for an oil and gas exploration right in an area which falls within the 11,224km2 Pletmos Basin. It is set to involve a 3D seismic survey in the basin located off our south coast, roughly between Knysna in the west and Jeffrey’s Bay in the east. The target area, about 2,500km2 of the basin, is located about 12km offshore and reaches up to 60km out to sea just east of Plett and west of Cape St Francis. During the public participation process of the environmental impact assessment phase, some 400 stakeholder comments were garnered and a petition against the project was signed by 1,186 people. The main issues raised by stakeholders include that the survey could have significant ecological impacts, specifically on marine fauna, due to the generation of underwater noise and the proximity of areas of environmental importance. Since the authorisation was granted several groups have submitted their opposition and a petition had been created in an attempt to stop the survey. According to the petition the target area is a pristine environment with a marine reserve. Supporters feel that apart from the fact that seismic blasts could have an effect on whales, dolphins, fish and other marine life, should the seismic tests find the oil and gas, the extraction process stands to compromise about 50,000 tourism jobs in the Pletmos Basin area. Garden Route Media

NEWS & VIEWS

31 January 2018

CXPRESS

‘Tender hands in death’s presence’ soon to be rendered powerless sans immediate financial support Chairman of the PlettAid Foundation board HILARY MATTHEWS reports on the bleak future faced by everyone in the care of this life-altering organisation when funding dries up in the very near future T PlettAid/Hospice Plett, we are committed to filling a crucial role in Bitou’s health and welfare service infrastructure to ensure that all, especially the poor, have access to quality care through two programmes. Palliative care and support are provided to those diagnosed with life-limiting illness. We offer 24-hour care in patients’ homes along with spiritual and bereavement counselling to those grieving their loss of health and independence, and to their family members. We lend tender hands in the presence of death, when eventually it comes. For this work we pay our professional nurses, on hand 24/7 and 7/7, to help managing pain and other symptoms and side-effects, so ensuring the best quality of life for patients. For this aspect of our work, we approach the corporate social investment arms of private-sector companies, requesting funds to cover operational costs. We succeeded in obtaining three-year grants (2015-2017) from Discovery through its Tshikululu Fund and from the National Lotteries Commission. But both of these grants are now coming to an end; renewing appeals is a protracted process, as we can re-apply only when all funds have been used and reported on. It’s a long wait before tranches are received. Past funders were Nedcor and Community Chest, and Plett property business Helen Melon eased our operational costs consider-

ably by sponsoring fuel for the many kilometres covered per day. For this support we are deeply grateful. In 2017, we were able to care for 256 local folk, 85 of whom were terminally ill and passed on - but 61 patients regained their health and were discharged! Plett Wellness is our second programme and is aimed at preventing lifelimiting diseases. A mobile health promotion and illness prevention service, it provides free screening and testing for chronic and preventable diseases to the broader Bitou community. This programme is funded by the Department of Health, enabling us to serve 6,200 local folk last year. We have worked extremely hard for the past two years to help ourselves by marketing Hospice Plett and raising funds locally. Our deputy chairman Annabelle Conyngham has worked ceaselessly and tirelessly in mounting local fundraising events, generously supported by those who staged and attended these events. Our profound gratitude goes to those who made donations and have done so much to spread the word about the work we do. This has been a huge contribution to our running costs but even so, we have not been able to raise enough funds to cover all costs. Sadly in 2017, our own Bitou Municipality did not see fit to fund us through the Mayoral Grant Programme. We have exercised stringent financial management and taken every opportunity to

raise funds. We have regular market events selling gentlyused household items, linen and kitchenware. A goal is establishing a Hospice Plett charity shop, but rentals are so high that we cannot risk that venture… yet. Lady Conyngham has played a pivotal role in setting up the Bitou Community Trust in the UK, for us to access foreign funders. (This Trust is exclusively for Hospice Plett, the Plettenberg Bay Community Environment Forum, and Robberg Coastal Corridor Initiative.) Lady Conyngham is once again hard at work in preparing for a number of local fundraising events in 2018, the quality of which is superb and well worth the cost of tickets. But as things stand at the end of January, we only have enough funds to see us through the first half of 2018; after that, we may face the grim reality that we can no longer continue to operate. We appeal to local Plettenberg Bay folk to keep us going this year - here’s how you can help: • Make a cash donation at your earliest convenience. • Make a monthly annual donation by debit order. • Support our GivenGain campaign (www.givengain. com/c/plettaid.org). • Dedicate gifts for your next birthday celebration to Hospice Plett. • Leave us a legacy in your last will and testiment. Each and every donation will encourage us to believe that we can indeed weather this crisis!

N L NATIONAL LOTTERIES COMMISSION LOTTO FUNDED TM

• Hilary Matthews joined the Board of Trustees and was elected chairman in 2014; her extensive knowledge of sustainable development in the NPO and civil society sector - with especial concern for the practise of good governance based on the key values of

leadership, accountability, meticulous fiscal oversight, inclusivity and transparency - has proved invaluable. Visit http://plettaid.org/do nate/ to contribute towards this essential service, and see the notice on this page for additional information and banking details.

NEVER IDLE: Hilary and her husband David ‘retired’ to Plett in 2003; during the 15 years since, she has managed Bitou 10 Foundation and after handing over those reins, was elected chairman of the PlettAid board

CXPRESS

31 January 2018

NEWS & VIEWS

SOCIAL SCENE

31 January 2018

SECRETS OF WINNERS REVEALED: A launch of the book ‘Win!’ by Jeremy Maggs - a journalist of 30 years’ experience in all spheres of the media - was held at Plettenberg Bay Country Club on Wednesday January 24, ably arranged by the Village Bookshop team. Pictured at left above, the author shares a moment with Gail and Jeremy Ractliffe prior to signing the copy they had purchased. At right, Jeremy Maggs is joined by, from left, Owen Williams of Knysna, Joburgers Irshaad Mohamed with Faheem and Shaheen Limbada, and Grant Livesey of Knysna. - Timothy Twidle

People, places & events PLETT’S THE VERY BEST! Sia Thomatos from Welgemoed recently contacted CXPRESS to ask for photographer Martin Hurwitz’s contact details, since she was trying to get her hands on this pretty pic he took of her nine-yearold daughter, Olivia Oberhofer, during the past season’s Colour Run at Plett Primary School. And it’s clear why she wanted her very own copy of this vibrant image! Said Sia: “Thank you Martin for capturing such lively pics of this annual event - great fun was had by everyone. Olivia attends Welgemoed Primary School and is in Grade 4 this year. We have a spot in Plett where we always enjoy our summer holidays - it’s pure chaos with many friends renting places near us, and our days are spent in the great outdoors. The kids do horse-riding lessons at the stables in Piesang Valley Road and also did surf lessons this year. For the rest of the time, they cycle and hover-board around the complex from friend to friend. It’s non-stop entertainment for them - so much so that we stayed from December 16 to January 14… virtually the entire holiday. You can never get bored in Plettenberg Bay!” - Photo: Martin Hurwitz

HOMECOMING QUEEN: Sedgefield - the hometown of Miss Universe Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters - pulled out all the stops to give her a fantastic homecoming party on Sunday January 28. Demi-Leigh was honoured with a street parade by the people who have supported her through her incredible journey to the top beauty title in the universe. Numerous VIPs and dignitaries participated in the parade, including the mayors of Greater Knysna and George, as well as Demi-Leigh’s parents and grandparents. Floats, dancers, bands, local schoolchildren, Harley Davidson bikers, Knysna Fire Department and Working with Fire, local NGOs, Sedgefield Animal Matters, tourism activity operators, and Knysna Tourism all took part in the parade to ensure a festive carnival atmosphere. A large contingent of media and members of the public lined the streets to give Demi-Leigh a rousing welcome home. Entertainment on the field after the parade was provided by singer Shaza Greeff and two DJs, as well as the Smutsville brass band and church choir. Pictured at right, Demi-Leigh is clearly delighted to see old friend Bomber Webb, editor of The Edge. At right below, she catches up on communications while her manager secures her crown prior to the parade. Below, Knysna mayor Eleanor Bouw-Spies bestows the freedom of the town upon Demi-Leigh before voicing her delight at currently being the only mayor in the universe who can claim that Miss Universe comes from her town! - Candice Ludick

CXPRESS

INTERVAL

31 January 2018

Remember the old manual typewriter? mother and her children had been up in the attic together doing some cleaning, when the kids uncovered an old manual typewriter and asked: “Hey, Mom, what’s this?” “Oh, that’s an old typewriter,” she answered, thinking that would satisfy their curiosity. “Well what does it do?” they asked. “I’ll show you,” she said and returned with a blank piece of paper. She rolled the paper into the typewriter and began striking

the keys, leaving black letters of print on the page. “Wow!” they exclaimed. “That’s really cool! But how does it work like that? Where do you plug it in?” “There is no plug,” she answered. “It doesn’t need a plug.” “Then where do you put the batteries?” the children persisted. “It doesn’t need batteries either,” their mother continued. “Wow! This is so cool!” they exclaimed. “Someone should have invented this a long time ago!”

It’s all in the delivery HREE big-time comedians are shooting the breeze in the dressing room of a nightclub after a late gig. They’ve heard one another’s material so often that they’ve reached the point where they don’t need to tell the jokes anymore to amuse one another; they just need to refer to each joke by a number. “Number 37!” cracks

the first comic, and the others break up laughing. “Number 53!” says the second person, and they all howl. Finally, it’s the third comic’s turn. “44!” he quips. He gets nothing, not even a snigger. “What?” he asks, “Isn’t 44 funny?” “Sure, it’s usually hilarious,” they answer. “But the way you tell it…”

Know a criminal lawyer? young fellow asked an older gentleman: “Excuse me, I’ve just moved here and I wonder if this town has any criminal lawyers?”

“Well,” replied the man, “I have lived here all my life and all I can tell you is we are pretty sure we do, but no one has been able to prove it yet.”

When it rains... the next day, and the next... lady moved from the city to settle in the country, and when she arrived it was raining. While she moved in, it rained. The next day it rained, and the next, and then the next. After several rainy days, while standing on her verandah, she noticed a young boy on the stoep of her neighbour’s house. Trying not to sound

too depressed, she called over in a cheerful voice: “Hi, Son, I’m your new neighbour.” “Hi,” the boy called back and waved. “Say, Son, does it ever stop raining here?” the lady asked. With a look of consternation, the youngster replied: “Lady, how would I know? I’m only six years old!”

Pay back the money man asked his lawyer: “My neighbour owes me R500 and he won’t pay up. What should I do?” “Do you have any proof that he owes you the money?” asked the lawyer. “Nope,” replied the man.

“Okay, then write him a letter asking him for the R5,000 he owes you,” said the lawyer. “But it’s only R500,” replied the man. “Precisely. That’s what he will reply, and then you’ll have your proof!”

I tried to re-marry my ex-wife, but she figured out I was only after my money.

31 January 2018 CLASSIFIEDS

CXPRESS

Gerhard van Huyssteen is your LOCAL registered Debt Counsellor (NCRDC#778)

Cell: 071 332 2341 Tel: 044 533 2805 Email: plett101@gmail.com

9 January 2018 31

Local registered counsellor for REAL debt counselling and COMPLETE peace of mind. Phone today for a FREE consultation with no obligations.

CXPRESS

ON THE SOAPBOX

31 January 2018

Letters to the Editor

Email: editor@cxpress.co.za - Fax: 044 533 0852 - PO Box 1449, Plett 6600

Talking nothing but rubbish: a clean town cheaper? If skips were is a healthy town removed as soon as full, This letter is a request to Bitou Municipality, the Ratepayers Association, and Plett Tourism to put heads together and find a solution to the problem of illegal rubbish dumps. Bitou Municipality is doing a good job in keeping the town and the taxirank, the beaches, and wealthier suburbs clean. From time to time there may be hiccups, but we must praise the effort. The old dump has been closed and waste is better managed than ever before. The biggest problem now is illegal dumps, which are out of control and a great concern as they are widespread, a health and environmental hazard, unpleasant to see, and a blot on our collective attitude to caring for our citizens. The wash from them when it rains ends up in our sea and lagoons. The

BAD-HEALTH HORIZON: Apart from household trash and chemicals, this illegal dump in New Horizons also contains animal carcasses

flies, odours, and insects spread disease. The photos here show a New Horizons dump, where even dead dogs are found among the rubbish. Constitutionally, they are a crime! Why do they arise? Perhaps rubbish collection is infrequent or the bins are too small or perhaps

there are no bins. Perhaps people do not want to keep the rubbish outside their house bin or no bin. Clearly something must be done. Our problems also seem to lie in the lack of funds for waste management; refuse trucks are expensive, so might skips be

would people use them or just carry on throwing their rubbish in the street? Perhaps skips on a contract basis instead of more trucks and a slogan such as ‘You skip it - we dump it’? An education programme would also be a great help to teach people about the health and environmental dangers of dumping rubbish. The Department of Environment and Tourism has issued a booklet entitled ‘Working with Waste’, which gives guidelines on waste collection in high density and underserviced areas. This is well worth reading (find it on their website). Please help address this problem by talking ‘rubbish’ to your councillor and pushing for a big clean-up and a new refuse removal system in Bitou. Peter Stratten, Plett

Historiese geboutjie in Storms verdien ‘n nuwe baadjie

what we love, since 1948

Nicolene 072 720 8677

Elke jaar gewoonlik as ek met verlof gaan breek ek net bietjie weg uit ons pragdorpie, Knysna. Ek besluit en beplan natuurlik dan waarheen ek wil gaan. Verlede jaar was ek in Goa, Indië, en hierdie jaar het ek besluit op Stormsrivier Village. Ek is ‘n boorling van Knysna en het opgegroei in die eertydse plekkie Kouse. My oorlede pa, ‘n visserman, het daar grootgeword en het verdrink in Stormsriviermond. Ons het nooit sy liggaam gekry nie. Die naweek in Stormsrivier Village was eksoties, die mense oorvriendelik - en mens voel altyd veilig. Ag, om weer die polisiestasie te kon sien, waar slegs drie winkels op daardie stadium was, die slaghuis en die poskantoor, destyds gemerk ‘White & Non-White’. Wat my bietjie in die voet geskiet het is die klipgebou tussen die polisiestasie en die ANC kantoor wat so verwaarloos en vervalle is. Ek was uiters teleurgesteld. In my verbeelding kon ek nog onthou hoe die destydse polisie met hul

MUSEUM MATERIAAL: Die verwaarloosde klipgebou te Stormsrivier Village, gebou ‘Stombol’, behoort in ‘n museum omskep te word - daar lê so baie waardevolle herinneringe in hierdie plekkie, so kom ons laat ons geskiedenis voortleef!

helmets en advokadogroen uniforms daar gestaan het in die gebou. Ek wil net weet of daardie geboutjie nie miskien opgeknap kan word en vir ‘n museum gebruik word nie - iets waardevols. Die gebou is uit pure klip gemaak en is gemerk ‘Stombol’ soos hul die plekkie Stormsrivier afgekort het. Ek sluit foto’s in van die plekkie en hoop van harte dat iemand iets hieraan kan doen. Ek het met die alombekende Stormsrivier inwoner Pieter Japhta gepraat en hom gevra hoekom hulle nie iets doen aan die historiese gebou nie. Hy het gelag en genoem dat hy maar sal kyk. Groot was my verbasing toe ek sien tot waar ons CXPRESS travel. Dus wend ek my tot u en hoop van harte dat Stormsrivier inwoners, veral die ouer gardes, die waarde van daardie klipgebou sien soos ek. Vriendelike groete - en ja, ek was alombekend as Katie Juries, vir die wie my nie ken nie. Mooi loop! Katrina de Wee, Knysna

Many kids still in need of stationery and uniforms KwaNokuthula Community Police Forum (CPF) in partnership with Angel of Fire International Ministry Church had a very successful holiday activity programme from December 6 to January 16. We had 105 children from Kwano, Kranshoek, and New Horizons doing dancing, singing, games, and a Christmas party on December 23 (see photo), when we also invited kids from Masizame Children’s Shelter to join our children. On January 15 and 16, we did a back to school drive for all primary schools in these Bitou areas to give stationery to children in need. We thank all the people and businesses, like Keystone Projects, for their support of this programme. If you can help the many children still in need of school clothes and stationery, please call Ntombi on 083 955 9338. Thanks in advance! - Ntomboxolo Mrubata (KwaNokuthula CPF project co-ordinator), Plett

ON THE SOAPBOX

31 January 2018

Letters to the Editor

Email: editor@cxpress.co.za - Fax: 044 533 0852 - PO Box 1449, Plett 6600

Is Plett ready for Cape Town’s day zero? Has anyone thought about what happens when all the millions of people in Cape Town and Port Elizabeth run out of water, and its potential broader impact on Plett?

Anyone without a job or other compelling reason to remain living under the predicted impossible conditions will likely turn to family and friends to seek refuge elsewhere un-

This is why the death rate on SA roads is so high

til things improve. It is highly likely that towns such as George, Plett, and Knysna would provide suitable refuge. Under the circumstances, such an influx into relatively small towns could place enormous strain, not only on its water and sanitation infrastructure, but also on other ameni-

ties such as clinics, schools, transport, policing, and social services. With Day Zero drawing very close, we would like some assurance from council and their provincial counterparts that they have the necessary contingency plans in place. ‘Concerned Resident’, Plett

Traditional estate agent puzzled by claims of attorneys’ expertise

This photograph was taken by my dash-cam on Monday January 22 at approximately 2:40pm on the Airport Road coming towards Plett. A white bakkie with a George registration number (CAW 94491) passed me on a double white line on a blind bend. Makes one think, doesn’t it? - John Larter, Plett

Non-supply of Keurbooms electricity irks Once again, we have NO electricity in Keurbooms. Is there any competent person in Bitou’s electrical department that can sort this out once and for all? If not, then please employ someone from upcountry that knows a thing or two about electricity supply. Every time it rains, the wind blows or we have a little thunder somewhere in the distance, the power goes off. Please don’t blame it on Eskom, the government, the previous town council, old equipment or

apartheid, for that matter! It is your responsibility to ensure that we have electricity, as we pay you, and no one else. This is no longer a joke. Maybe a little preventive maintenance will do the trick instead of sitting there in your office waiting for the power to go off again before attempting to fix it. ‘Fed-up Accounts Payer’, Plett (We are awaiting a response from Bitou’s electrical department in this regard. - Eds.)

Bitou will be liable if own by-laws not implemented

I have no intention of getting into a bun fight, and I appreciate the views of Mr Heynike and local attorney Dale Hobbs [turn to page 7 of the January 17 edition at www.cxpress. co.za and read ‘The more things change…’] - we live in a democratic country, do we not? However, as a retired ‘traditional’ agent, who was and still is respected for having been extremely successful for over 30 years in this area, I generally found that the higher commission was not an issue. What was of utmost importance was the trust, experience, and quality of service in my dealings with prospective buyers and sellers. Realistically, the boss took his 50% of the commission to cover overheads. And the traditional agent pays his or her own fuel, vehicle, etc. - and a big chunk to SARS - so is usually left with only 3% or less, anyway. Sure, Fidelity Fund Guarantee Certificates protect the attorneys and their sales representatives at 3%.com, but does it protect the public from inexperienced, canvassing representatives, or people who have not necessarily passed the Board internship and exams? These equate to ‘apprentice’ traditional agents, who also require a qualified agent or principal to

draw up the necessary documentation, but are prepared to pay the price for their long and often very expensive studies out of their own pockets. I noticed that Mr Heynike does not give a direct answer to the question: “What about 3%.com’s sales reps - are they estate agents or not?” When choosing an attorney, I do not seek the services of the cheapest one but most certainly the most qualified, respected, and experienced one who I knew from previous dealings - would look after my client, and who studied for many years to attain his/her articles. One local “agent” is advertising herself as a “resident agent” for certain areas in Plettenberg Bay. A question that I would like a reply to, Mr Hobbs, is this: Is she an agent or not? If not, surely she should be advertising herself as an attorney’s representative? Traditional agents are bound by the Estate Agency Board’s Code of Conduct and (in 5.3) may not claim to be an expert or to have specialised knowledge in respect of any estate agency’s service if, in fact, he/she is not such an expert or does not have such special knowledge. How is this applied? Since I am not a practising agent any longer, these matters do puzzle me. Rita van Rensburg, Plett

Bitterness of poor quality

The accompanying picture shows a sidewalk in the vicinity of Sanctuary Beach. This is a busy area most of the year, but particularly in holiday season, when pedestrians and vehicles share very limited space. To deliberately obstruct the sidewalk, so as to make it impossible for the public to step out of the roadway, shows an absolute disdain for the safety of everyone except the property owner himself. If a child is injured or killed as a result of this deliberate obstruction, I believe the owner will have a serious problem on his hands. Furthermore, I believe that if Bitou Municipality fails to implement their own by-laws they, too, will be implicated. I hereby request that the relevant authorities deal with this issue without delay, as well as many other similar cases of sidewalk obstruction in our town. If we wish to be considered a desirable tourist destination, we need to show that the safety of the public matters to us. - ‘Don’t Park On This,’ Plett

In the articles which I have read in regard to 3%.com, much is made of the Fidelity Cover and level of commission payable, but little of the experience needed to provide objective advice to clients and produce a consistently high level of performance. Attorneys and accountants are required to serve articles and write exams under strict conditions and prove their abilities - so, too, do the crème de la crème in the estate agency field. If you have a tough

legal problem, who do you go to: the cheapest lawyer in town or the one with a reputation for solving problems? Remember, the joy of a cheap price is long forgotten whilst the bitterness of poor quality lingers. Caveat emptor*. Mike Hardaker, Plett (*The principle that the buyer alone is responsible for checking the quality and suitability of goods before a purchase is made. We hope to procure a response from the local 3%.com bureau in a future edition. - Eds.)

CXPRESS

Read CXPRESS online at www.cxpress.co.za

CXPRESS

Read CXPRESS online @ www.cxpress.co.za

Former Bok: ‘Adventure racing tougher than fighting All Blacks’ NYSNA local Graham Bird is taking his team to New Zealand for the largest adventure racing event in the world. And this time he has a former Springbok wing on his side to tackle the field of 100 teams - one of which happens to include former All Black captain Richie McCaw. Expedition adventure racing is the ultimate sport of sports, where teams of four athletes race together, unsupported through the wilderness non-stop for days on end, mountain biking, trail running, and paddling to checkpoints marked on a map over distances of around 500km. As much as they must be physically fit, the navigation skills, strategies, and mental fortitude of all members combine to make the strongest competitors. Team Merrell, which includes Karatara legend Hanno Smit (on standby for this race), is consistently rated among the top 10 in the world and is a regular on the podium at international and local events. An army of armchair adventurers follow Team Merrell’s multi-day races avidly via the online live tracking system that shows teams as dots on a map. The dots get encouraged and shouted at and redirected onto a better route from thousands of screens - and it’s not uncommon for supporters to admit getting even less sleep than their favourite team during a week-long race. The New Zealand Godzone Pure event is consid-

La Luna

SPORT & ADVENTURE

31 January 2018

ered one of the toughest endurance races in the world and this year’s edition from March 1-10 is set in Fiordland, down at 45 degrees South, with a landscape dominated by the steep snow-capped Southern Alps and deep fiords carved by glaciers. The average rainfall can be 8,000mm per year (about 10 times that of Knysna’s normal fall) and most of the lakes are considered inaccessible with no roads or tracks. Conditions could be similar to the extreme Patagonian Expedition that Merrell raced to third place in 2016. The team is expecting to be out for about seven days. Taking on the Godzone Pure along with Graham Bird are Grant Ross from Cape Town, Stefan Terblanche from ‘Sharkland’, and Jane Swarbreck, who originally hails from Gauteng but currently calls London home. The three guys met Hanno and Tracey Campbell last Friday to train together in Knysna during the weekend, and to give Stefan a taste of what he’s in for. Since retiring from professional rugby, Stefan has completed the Cape Epic, Sani2Sea and half Ironman. He has summited Kilimanjaro and has kept up his fitness and strength, but adventure racing tests other mysterious muscles and a whole different strain of stamina. “It’s tougher than fighting the All Blacks!” Stefan admitted after the

THE HOLIDAY IS OVER… Stefan Terblanche spent most of his childhood holidays in Knysna, but last weekend’s training session for Godzone Pure was the first time he had paddled outside of the Heads - Photos: LizaMay Images

LET IT FLY! Graham Bird heads up the squad during the weekend’s training in and around Knysna

weekend spent paddling, mountain biking, navigating through thick bush at midnight, and trekking the trails with all the gear necessary for the race. The former Shark grew up holidaying in Knysna, as his mom was born and bred here and his aunt still lives here. This was

the first time he had paddled outside of the Heads. Visit www.advaddicts. com and Merrell Adventure Addicts on Facebook for updates, and see www. godzoneadventure.com for more info on the event. The live tracking site will be announced just before the race kicks off.