Installing a counter-pulley in worldly interaction

Editor :

Deepak Desai April 2009 Vol. : 4, Issue : 6 Conti. Issue No.: 42

DADAVANI Installing a counter-pulley in worldly interaction

Publisher, Owner & Printed by : Deepak Desai on behalf of Mahavideh Foundation, 5, Mamtapark Soc., Usmanpura, Ahmedabad-380014 Gujarat, India.

EDITORIAL The nature of the mind is verily unsteady and it can never become steady. The thoughts will not refrain from sprouting in the mind. The speed of arising thoughts is different in everyone’s mind. It will show many phases within a minute. Absolutely revered Dadashri explains this speed at which these thoughts arise in scientific language as revolutions per minute.

There are two kinds of revolutions. Outer revolutions bring about evolution in physical science however inner revolutions bring about spiritual development. Before Self-realization, because of high revolutions Dadashri would attain the final assessment of everything through intuition arising from daily life events. He would then take this to test up to the level of experience and as a result of this exquisitely supreme inner endeavor, Akram Vignan manifest within Him. For Dadashri the revolutions of the mind are very high so miscommunications would arise in interacting with those with lesser revolutions in the worldly dealings. Thereafter he started installing a counter-pulley. The counter-pulley reduces the speed of thoughts and brings them down to the level of the speed of the thoughts of the other person and then the seeker easily understands the conversations.

Dadashri gives the example that if you connect a high-speed engine with a pump of lesser revolutions then the pump will break down. To avoid this loss if you apply a counter-pulley to the engine and connect with the pump then the equivalent speed will make the pump function to its best capacity.

If one applies these incontrovertible understanding in his life then he will not have any matabheda divisiveness due to difference in opinion, clashes and worldly interactions would become easy. One should live one’s life becoming a disciple of everyone, so one has to become laghuttam lower than the lowest. One has to live with a child like a child, with a son like a friend, I am not a father but I am a son of the son, not an uncle but the nephew of the nephew, not a grandfather but grandson of the grandson, not as a husband but wife of the wife, not a motherin-law but a daughter-in-law of the daughter-in-law, this intent is called a setting of a counterpulley. The greatest suffering in this life is the inability to adjust. So one can resolve many worldly puzzles easily, if he takes adjustments by installing a counter-pulley with understanding.

Dadashri carried out ideal worldly interactions without having any matabheda, by taking adjustment via a counter-pulley thus coming down to the level of the spiritual seekers and mahatmas and explained the top levels of spiritual talks in very simple and straightforward language. It is our hearty prayer that we understand this wonderful science of such a compassionate and matchless scientist and apply it in our worldly life, get the essence of its secrets and thereby get our work of liberation done with the continuous experience of the blessed state. ~ Deepak Desai

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Installing a counter-pulley in worldly interactions (Please note that ‘S’ for Self, or ‘Y’ for You, refers to the awakened one in Akram Vignan, or the eternal

Self. The ‘s’ for self refers to the worldly self. For a detailed glossary please see: www.dadashri.org/ glossary.html)

Mind is unsteady: the Self is steady Questioner: Why is the human mind unsteady?

all such thoughts then the account will not be brought to a zero and you will become harassed and fatigued unnecessarily.

Dadashri: It is unsteady due to its innate nature. It is not possible to make it still at all.

The mind should remain in its nature swabhav.

If it becomes steady then it will become blunt— useless.

This mind is such a thing that it had created destruction in the great penance of the great sages of the past. Such is the nature of mind. Therefore you have to apply some counter thought against the mind. Do you apply something?

Questioner: Mind is unsteady and it remains steady only for a little while.

Questioner: I do apply counter thought.

Dadashri: It is a mistake to turn the mind’s unsteadiness into steadiness. The mind is unsteady and the Self is steady. If you will try to make your mind steady, the self (relative) will become unsteady. The fact is, all this is in balance. They are all counterweights. If you place five pounds on this side of the scale, there is not telling how high the scale will rise on the other side.

Dadashri: Yes, you should apply counter thought. You have to use some counterweight for sure.

Counter thought against the mind

Questioner: It is said that for Lord Mahavir, the mind was remaining under proper control. My mind keeps on wandering all around.

Questioner: Now whatever thing the mind holds on to, does the same thing reproduce-present outside?

Dadashri: Yes, whatever is in mind, it will not stay without coming out. When the time comes it will come out. So when the time is 5:20 PM, the space and other circumstances will come together and then it—the mind will begin exhausting the thoughts. At that time one would wonder why such thoughts are arising?

Now one may get thoughts about getting married at the age of sixty. In a way a stroke—cerebral infarct is about to happen. Hey you! A thought about getting married at the age of sixty? Alas!

Such thoughts may arise too. Then you have to apply some counter thought against that thought.

If you do not place a counter thought against 2

It requires great awareness, full awareness. The mind starts to become subdued when one applies such awareness; otherwise one starts to become subdued to mind.

Revolutions of the mind

Dadashri: The more the mind wanders, the better it is for you and if it doesn’t wander, it should be pushed into wandering around more.

Idle mind is of no use at all. If the mind doesn’t wander around, it can’t be called the mind at all. The thoughts come and leave constantly.

Questioner: But Dada, others may not be getting a lot of imaginations. I get a lot of imaginations. If something happens, I get a lot of imaginations about it.

Dadashri: The mind is very unsteady.

The revolutions of the machinery are very high!

That is how it is. And if the revolutions were not so many, then you are the type of person who April 2009

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will have so much moha illusionary attachment that you will take over the whole of Mumbai.

It is verily because of the revolutions that your moha illusionary attachment has decreased!

What does revolution mean?

Questioner: What is meant by the term revolutions?

Dadashri: It is the speed at which thoughts occur; everyone has different speed of thinking. If something happens, the mind will show many things within just one minute, it will show all the phases of the incident at a time.

All these powerful presidents have twelve hundred revolutions, ‘ours-the Gnani Purush’ are at five thousand. Lord Mahavir had a hundred thousand per minute!

If we have two thousand revolutions, Lord Mahavir had a hundred thousand revolutions per minute. So he can understand your talk even before you say it. Even you just about to say anything he will understand that.

No one in these times has revolutions similar to the revolutions that Lord Mahavir had.

Now how can one even attempt to talk to him? So he would not talk with anybody. For Him parmanu (indivisible particle of atom being the substrate for karma) would continue to come forth. Everyone would understand the Lord’s language in his own language.

Separation due to high revolutions There are two kinds of revolutions, one is outer revolution and another is inner revolution. Outer revolution can help to progress speedily in outer science. Foreigners do not have that many inner revolutions yet their inner revolutions are developing. And people in India have fully developed revolutions; that is why their greed extends to eight generations.

Someone may have three thousand revolutions per minute; someone may have five hundred revolutions. I used to have very high April 2009

revolutions at the time when the Gnan— enlightenment was not there. So how much trouble did I go through? Tremendous revolutions. Within one second it revolved innumerable times. So too many revolutions were there and that’s why there was a desire— thought to be free of moha illusionary attachment. It came to: This is sheer misery so the heck with it, let it go!

I made a use of the revolutions of the mind thus Once at the age of twenty-two, I had arrived at a village on Halol Road and there I missed my bus by a minute. Actually I had come to the bus station an hour earlier, but I got delayed at a restaurant and missed the bus by a minute.

This situation was one of turmoil. It would have been understandable if I were late in reaching the bus station in the first place; I would have accepted the fact that I was late and would not have been so annoyed. But here I had come an hour early and yet missed the bus and had to wait an hour and a half for the next one.

Now let me tell you what state I was in when I had to wait for an hour and a half.

What a thought struggle was going on within.

An ordinary person, for example would have, say fifty thought struggles whereas I would have a hundred thousand. You can imagine the suffering. I never liked waiting, even if someone were to offer a comfortable seat during the wait. That hour and a half seemed like twenty hours. That is when I realized that waiting for someone or something is the greatest foolishness in this world. So since then I stopped waiting for anything. And if in case I had to wait I would engage the mind in something. There are times when you have no choice but to wait.

I saw a great opportunity in such a situation.

Instead of idling away the time worrying about the arrival of the next bus, I made some internal adjustments. Then I was at peace. Can some adjustments not be made? I will tell you what 3

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I did. I would read Krupadudev’s writing or some other saint’s. I would not recite it but I would read it. To recite it is to repeat from memory. Instead I would read it.

Questioner: How could you read without a book, Dada?

Dadashri: I would read without the book.

I would visualize the written words: ‘Dear Lord’ and then I would read them. The mind recalls and memorizes and that perpetuates the ‘I and my—vikalp and sankalp’! The task of memorizing frees the mind which then wanders when reciting mechanically, ‘Dear Lord’, ‘Dear Lord.’ In all this I had made the adjustment of visualizing each and every word, ‘Dear merciful Supreme Lord, what can I do? I am full of infinite faults.’ I would see each and every word including the comas, exclamation marks and the capital letters. Reading this way is ‘our—the Gnani Purush’s’ greatest discovery.

I teach others to ‘read’ and speak the words.

Inner clarity arose during internal struggle It is out of such internal struggles that this knowledge arose. If it was not for being frustrated for that hour and a half…

Questioner: If you had not missed that minute…

Dadashri: This knowledge came about as a consequence of missing that minute. It is from having stumbled over and over again in life, that this knowledge and inner clarity has arisen. One becomes aware after one stumbles and falls. That inner clarity has always been very helpful to me. After what happened at the age of twenty-two, I have never waited for anything. If a train is late for three and a half hours, I would not pass my time unnecessarily doing this or that, I would remain in the awareness of the Self.

Deep introspection before Gnan Questioner: You must have done a lot 4

of introspection and deep thinking before your enlightenment.

Dadashri: There is nothing in this world that I have not thought about. That is why this Gnan manifested. By the time you speak two words, the whole poem; is analyzed by me.

With five thousand revolutions of thought processes per minute going on within me, I can extract the essence of any scripture, within two minutes. The scriptures are not complete. Only a Gnani has complete knowledge. The scriptures only show the direction.

He comes down to our level to explain the Gnan to us Questioner: Even after deep and minute thinking we are not able to grasp the totality of the Gnan that Dada has attained.

Dadashri: You would not be able to do so; it is of a very high level. I have to come down to a lower level in order to talk to you about it. This Gnan is of such a high level that I have to bring it down to a lower level for people to understand it, but even then people are not able to understand it completely. People will not understand a word of what I say if I talked about Gnan at the higher level.

Questioner: Dada in order to explain things, you come down to the level of the person you are addressing whereas elsewhere people have to rise to the level of the Gnani if they want to understand anything.

Dadashri: Yes, I have to come down to their level otherwise I will not succeed. They will not be able to understand me. I have to apply a ‘counter- pulley’ and come down to their level.

The speech that I ‘speak’ is of a very peak level. This fact is of very high level. If people standing down at a lower level ask me a question about what is up there and if I want to give them information then they will not understand if I just speak from up there so I April 2009

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have to come down to a lower level in order to talk to them. So I have to talk to them in their language for them to understand.

Adjustment of counter-pulley Now what does their language mean? If you have engine that has fifteen hundred revolutions, and if you want to connect a pump that has a thousand revolutions, then what do you have to do?

Questioner: I have to use a pulley.

Dadashri: So if you try to connect directly then that pump will break down. So you have to put a counter-pulley in between.

Similarly I have to do that with my speech. I have to bring the level of the speech down to explain the things.

Questioner: These talks of yours are such that one cannot understand that speedily.

Everybody cannot understand this. One needs to have a mental orientation to grasp it.

Dadashri: Yes, that is right, one needs to have that.

Questioner: Yet your explanations are so much clear and exact that no one has any confusion.

Dadashri: Even then people may get confused. These poor people eat rice and lentils and leave their homes to go to work. However by doing this if they attain moksha—ultimate liberation, in two to four more lives, then it is more than enough.

Everyone’s understanding is different Questioner: There are different varieties in language too. For instance there is some element of a subtle message in some language wherein one has to understand the total talk in a few words only.

Dadashri: Yes. It is so. If you talk to your clerk and if you talk to a stranger then the stranger will not be able to grasp at all. What is the reason for this?

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Questioner: In Mudji Jetha Market as the customer comes, so is the order for a cup of tea, such as simple tea, special tea, tea with milk, tea with double milk. Only the servant understands that.

Dadashri: And the customer will not understand. Now what is the reason that he does not understand this? He is not able to grasp that.

Set up counter-pulleys this way Everyone’s revolutions are different. The people of higher understanding have five hundred revolutions per minute; whereas those with lesser understanding have fifty revolutions per minute. So until the tea is consumed, he does not have any idea of what is going on in the shopping setting. Why? This is because his revolutions are very slow.

Fifty revolutions per minute means when you say something simple, it takes him a while to get it. When you tell him some thing about simple worldly interaction, he does not understand it. Therefore, you explain it to him in some other manner, and then he understands it.

Before Gnan-enlightenment, it used to take a lot of time for such people to understand my talk and instructions. I would attempt to make them understand and yet they would not be able to understand. So then I would react by saying, ‘you have no sense,’ and this would only increase and feed my ego. I would become angry repeatedly with, ‘I am saying this and why is he not listening? What a stupid man!’

Later I realized that his revolutions were slow and that was the reason for his inability to comprehend. Now if we point out an error in someone else, it is our own error. Therefore, after that, I started placing counter-pulleys.

An engine of three thousand revolutions per minute will destroy a pump that runs on fifteen hundred revolutions per minute and therefore you have to use a counter-pulley if 5

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you want to run the pump using the engine.

Both will work fine despite the differences in the revolutions but you have to place a counterpulley between the two in order for the pump to receive the cycle of fifteen hundred revolutions. Do you understand this concept of a counter-pulley? I used the same concept when talking to other people with lesser revolutions so that they would understand what I was saying.

Doing this stopped me from losing my temper.

For ‘us—the Gnani Purush and the fully enlightened Self within,’ the revolutions within are similar to Lord Mahavir, however the setting of the counter-pulley allows ease harmony and understanding mayda with all. No one feels any fear or anxiety with or through ‘us.’ Even a laborer would not be afraid because ‘we’ have not come here to hurt anyone.

Faster the revolutions greater the understanding The one, who has higher revolutions of intellect, has higher energy of understanding.

He can understand even before you say anything. The ones with lesser understanding have fifty revolutions however an intelligent person has thousand to two thousand revolutions per minute. One can understand this ‘Gnan’ with speed if his revolutions are fast.

What does the awareness of time mean?

Questioner: Is there a difference between the awareness of samaya jagruti awareness in time and vichar jagruti awareness of thoughts?

Dadashri: Awareness of thought is very gross matter compared with time awareness.

It is an extremely gross matter. Motion related to movement of two subatomic particles in space char is subtle and to vichar move into the nonSelf, to think—is gross.

Questioner: Awareness in both the ‘vi— non-Self’ and the ‘char’, can be compared to the awareness in time samaya jagruti?

Dadashri: No, that awareness is quite further. Awareness in time samaya jagruti is the very last and final awareness.

Questioner: Samaya jagruti means there is awareness of one parmanu indivisible subatomic particle, within a specific time. So then what is the relationship between time and awareness?

Dadashri: When one parmanu crosses another parmanu that is called samaya time.

Faster the revolutions, higher the awareness

Questioner: The scientists have decided so far, that one millionth part of one second is called samaya! What does one millionth part of awareness jagruti mean? What does the awareness of that one samaya mean?

Everyone’s awareness jagruti is different. You can grasp what I am trying to convey depending upon your awareness. What will happen when my revolutions are five thousand per minute and yours are five hundred per minute? You can’t comprehend. You can’t grasp my words. Your revolutions need to be higher. That is called awareness. As the revolutions increase, the awareness will increase proportionately. Higher revolutions are defined as the ability to understand exactly the moment the other person begins to speak.

Dadashri: The world has not reached at that level of samayasaar—essence of time.

The world has not attained the essence of one samaya. Samaya leads to the smallest particle of matter an atom, its parmanu (indivisible particle of atom) from anu (atom, molecule), by dividing atom we can get parmanu.

Parmanu is indivisible. Similarly samaya is the indivisible fraction of time (kaal). Where is the divisible form of time? You can divide a year by twelve months. You can divide a month by thirty days, you can divide a day by twenty-

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four hours, you can divide an hour by sixty minutes, you can divide one minute by sixty seconds, but these people have discovered that the smallest fraction of second is called a samaya. What these scientist have discovered!

Lord Mahavir and the twenty-three other Tirthankaras had reached at the level of the smallest fraction of samaya at that time. I have not reached at the level of five hundred samaya, they had reached at one samaya.

People have learned to do all this. Now if an engine of three hundred revolutions will not work with a pump of fifteen hundred revolutions per minute, will it work? It will not do. As that engine does not have that much force at all. Now if the engine does not have that much force then we have to place counterpulleys. Now if you try to explain to a laborer then will it take a time for him to understand your talk?

The Lord has a revolution per one samaya. These people do not have revolution per second. The smallest unit of time is one samaya. If one has the revolution per samaya then he is a Kevalgnani—One who has attained absolute enlightenment.

Questioner: It will definitely take some

Understanding time in simple terms Let me explain to you time in simple terms. Some engines run at three hundred revolutions per minute, some run at fifteen hundred, some run at three thousand revolutions per minute. Now for the engine that runs at three hundred revolutions per minute and if you have a pump of fifteen hundred, then will that pump be able to pull?

Questioner: No. Dadashri: Then what if an engine runs at fifteen hundred and a pump runs at three hundred? Why, will it not pull? If an engine is of fifteen hundred revolutions and a pump is of three hundred revolutions, then what?

Questioner: Dada it will not run without using a pulley at all.

Dadashri: An engine is capable, it has fifteen hundred revolutions and a pump has only three hundred revolutions. So you can do plusminus and set a counter-pulley between the two.

You can increase or decrease the speed with the use of that counter-pulley. If the pump is smaller of three hundred revolutions then we can increase if we want to.

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time.

Dadashri: And what if you will try to explain to this gentleman?

Questioner: He will understand.

Dadashri: This is because your revolutions are compatible with this gentleman and with that laborer it will not match so if you place a counter-pulley then you will be able to talk. I talk with everybody using a counterpulley. If I talk straight with everybody then nobody will be able to grasp it.

So I have to come down to a lower level in order to talk to people. Then people can understand. I come so much down then only people are able to understand. Now again everyone will not have similar level of understanding. You can understand. I have to use counter-pulley for others. If we do not use a counter-pulley then it will fracture. I decrease my revolutions and come down to a lower level to talk to you. If I talk with same revolutions then the engine will break. There are two kinds of revolutions. One kind of revolution is that which runs in the wrong direction; and the other kind is that which runs in the right direction.

Those, which rotate in the right direction, can take you on samyak right path. Those, which rotate in the wrong direction, can take you on the viparit wrong path. There are many big officers who rotate in the wrong direction. If they ask you anything, in reply there is no reply 7

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to be given at all. Their talk is always contradictory vibhangi. It will not fit in our brain at all. They will talk in such a vibhangi destructive way that I cannot answer them, so I would sit down. This is because it is vibhangi speech, wrong revolutions. Mine are right revolutions, yours are in the wrong direction.

How can I connect my engine with yours?

Did you understand this talk?

Questioner: Yes. Dadashri: If I want to talk to you then what do I have to do? I have to place a counterpulley. Your revolutions are fifteen hundred to two thousand per minute and mine are five to ten thousand per minute so in order to match your two thousand, I have to place a counterpulley. Otherwise it will break you. Only the one who has higher revolutions can grasp my talk, otherwise how can one grasp my talk?

Gnani’s discovery of counter-pulley I use a counter-pulley with everyone. It is not just a matter of getting rid of the ego; I also have to use a counter-pulley with everyone.

That is why I never have any separation due to difference in opinion matabheda with anyone.

I am able to understand the person I am dealing with and his limited revolutions, and therefore I use a counter-pulley.

Questioner: Should we only speak after coming down to the level of the other person?

Dadashri: Yes, you should only talk after you come down to their level. Even as I talk to you, my revolutions go all over the place. If you do not know how to use a counter-pulley, what fault is it of the one with fewer revolutions? It is your own fault for not knowing how to use a counter-pulley.

If the other person’s revolutions are slow then lot of problems will rise. Now ‘we’ would know that the other person’s revolutions are slow so we would use a counter-pulley right 8

away. If we do not set a counter-pulley with this little child then how could I go along with him?

If we do not set a counter-pulley then his belt will break down. I had investigated this theory myself. Before I used to clash with others but after setting a counter-pulley everything stopped.

Counter-pulley prevents divisiveness due to differences in opinions What is the cause behind matabheda separation due to differences in opinions? If your wife’s revolutions are at a hundred and yours are at five hundred, then there will be conflict if you do not know how to apply a counter-pulley. Many times even the engine breaks down. Do you understand what I mean by revolutions? Someone’s revolutions are five hundred and someone else may be a thousand and another person may have twelve hundred.

The revolutions are dependent upon an individual’s development. You will only get your point across to the other person if you employ a counter-pulley and lower your revolutions.

Therefore you have to use a counter-pulley in between. You have to set a counter-pulley to match the revolutions of both. You do not know how to set a counter-pulley with your wife and therefore you fight. You can converse by setting a new counter-pulley, which lets your talk reach the other person.

Setting a counter-pulley with a wife Questioner: After marriage, both of us got to know each other better, and now we feel that we made an error of judgment in choosing each other. We are incompatible with each other. Therefore, what should we do to become compatible with each other so that we can be happy?

Dadashri: Whatever you have said so far, every sentence is false. In the first sentence you said that you both got to know each other April 2009

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better after marriage. This is not true. You have not understood anything. If you did understand each other, then there would be no problems.

I stopped all discord in my marriage after eliminating my interfering intellect. Only then I came to really know my wife. When did I come to understand Hiraba? When I was sixty years old. I got married at the age of 15. For 45 years I maintained a very close observation, then only I came to understand what she was like.

Questioner: So you understood after you attained Gnan?

Dadashri: Yes! After I attained Gnan, then I came to understand her. Otherwise one will not be able to understand. A person does not have the capacity to understand or see his wife. A man is not able to understand himself, as to what he is all about, let alone the wife.

Therefore, this sentence that ‘we understand each other’ has no meaning. No mistake was made in choosing each other.

Questioner: Dada, how did you come to know Hiraba? What did you do to really know her as she is?

Dadashri: I did close observation to see how the prakruti inherent nature of the nonSelf complex is. I started to learn her prakruti and all human living beings are verily dependent on prakruti. They are not independent.

Questioner: Did you come to know Hiraba at the age of sixty?

Dadashri: I came to know and understand her at the age of sixty with great difficulty.

I had attained this Gnan, even then one day matabheda had arisen. So next day I went and told her, ‘I made a mistake yesterday.’

Then she says, ‘no, what is your mistake? What is the fault in that?’ Once you understand each other’s prakruti, there is no dakhal result of interference of ego at all.

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We know the friend very well. That too we do not know him completely however we know some of his udaya unfolding of karma.

Why we are trying to understand and know the prakruti because we have to live with love with him. We do not want bondage. Even so, really speaking there is no bondage and we still want to connect with true love and that is why we are trying to understand it minutely. And this other way of straighten and correct it anyway you can, is not the way to understand it—the prakruti. One should not attempt it in that way.

Questioner: Explain to me how I should come to understand. How can one slowly and subtly understand her with love? How can a husband do that for his wife, explain this.

Dadashri: When can you understand?

When you make her your equal. Next, give her space. When you play the game of checkers, you enjoy the game only when both sides have equal rights in taking turns. However, here where do they give equal rights? I give equal rights.

Questioner: How do you do this? How can this be done practically?

Dadashri: Even in your mind you should not regard her as a separate entity, and she should not feel separate from you. Even when her speech is inappropriate, you should treat her as an equal; in this manner you will not bring any pressure on her.

So try to recognize the other person’s prakruti (inherent characteristics/tendencies).

Then try to find some other ways that can help you. Don’t I try different methods to get people to do things? Don’t people do as I tell them?

They do and it is not because I have the skills, but because I use different methods.

One cannot get his work done by some other ways if this Gnan is not given to him. We have given you Gnan that is why you can use 9

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different methods and get people to do the things. And if you ask them to do different ways then it can change a lot. I am asking you to change the way of telling them to do the things after taking Gnan then the way you used to ask them before the Gnan. Otherwise I cannot tell someone else who has not taken Gnan.

You cannot find other as long as you do not remove that old one. If you remove one then you can find another. Did you understand like that or not?

Flexibility of the Gnani Questioner: What do you do when someone of the same status as You comes here?

revolutions with them and therefore they are able to grasp what I am saying, otherwise the machine will break down.

Questioner: How is it that you get along well with such little children?

Dadashri: ‘We’ keep at hand a set of ‘counter-pulleys.’ ‘We’ have so many such sets that whatever kind of person comes here, ‘we’ immediately apply an appropriate counter-pulley.

So if a small toddler comes along and does ‘Jai, Jai’ to ‘us,’ then I have to communicate with him, do I not? No child ever has any fear when he sees me.

Adjust by installing a counter-pulley

Dadashri: There is no equivalent status as ‘this’ one. This status is considered a unique and unparalleled state (ajod). The scripture writers have called this an unparalleled state.

Questioner: Today’s children seem to be more interested in playing, than their schoolwork. How can we guide them towards education without creating any conflict?

If someone with ‘our’ status were to come here, I would become his disciple. I have decided from the beginning to become a disciple of everyone. So he will not have any difficulty.

He who becomes a disciple may become a guru in the next life, so tread carefully with awareness in such situations. Therefore, do not become a guru. And what do I gain from becoming that person’s disciple? I may become his guru! If he has any problems, he will have to come and ask.

Dadashri: Start a reward system. Tell them you will give them so much for getting good grades at school and passing all their exams. Give them some incentive. If they see immediate positive reinforcement they will seize the opportunity. Another approach is to love them unconditionally. If you give them love they will do what you tell them. Children readily listen to me and will do whatever I tell them.

We should always try our best to give them the right understanding. We should never give up on them. We should make all the efforts. After that whatever they do is correct and accept that it was meant to be.

Questioner: I did not quite get that, Dada!

Dadashri: A relationship is established when ‘I’ become his disciple. So then he will come back to ‘me’ as a disciple. Had ‘I’ not become his disciple, he would not have come to ‘me’ and taken advantage of My presence.

If ‘we’ meet someone in the train, and he does not know that I am a Gnani, even then I will ‘set a pulley’ of ‘I am a passenger.’

I also get along very well with children because I will set a counter-pulley of forty 10

Questioner: But that child has interest in some other line, he is not interested in studying.

Dadashri: So if someone does not have interest then by any means if he learns up to matriculation then it is more than enough. He may become a businessman and may be his prakruti is like that then what can anyone do?

Otherwise if we ask him to quit going school then also he will not quit.

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You have to see what qualities your child has. You have to check and see whether he is stealing or killing bugs intentionally. All such thing you have to take in observation, then the rest you may let go.

Questioner: My main question was how we should get them to understand the importance of education. They still do not listen to us.

Dadashri: That is because you do not know how to be a mother, otherwise why would they not listen? They refuse to listen because you yourself did not listen to your own parents.

Questioner: Is it also the effect of the cultural environment?

Dadashri: No, it is not the environment’s fault whatsoever. It is because the parents do not know how to be parents. Being a parent is a greater responsibility than even that of a Prime Minister.

Questioner: How can that be?

Dadashri: If a Prime Minister does something wrong, he would hurt the country, but as a parent, if you were to do something wrong, it would hurt your own child. The children should be glad to see their parents as soon as they come home, but nowadays the children feel that it would be better if the father did not come home at all. What is one to do?

These children are afraid of older people.

A little child feels fear because of the heat of the intellect of the elder person, so what one needs to do? One has to become like a child.

One has to become like a child without understanding. One has to interact with children like a little child then it will play with you. Even a year and half-old child would play with me, as if we were of the same age. Should we not be able to see some kind of result, at least?

Think about this and one day you will be able to understand. Once it comes in to your understanding then you will be able to find it.

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And one needs to have an impartial approach.

This ability to see it from the viewpoint of the child may be difficult for you (awareness) but it will come to you eventually.

Apply artful skill rather than force If a student does not learn or does not answer then a teacher would scold him, ‘do you understand anything? Hey you stupid, speak up, speak!’ Now the parents pay extra money for tuition for the child to get good grades. But if a teacher gets frequently angry with a student then he would become dumb and unresponsive.

So where will the teacher end up? Those who are observing this would think that this little child has become fearful and unresponsive. And they will say to a teacher, ‘why are you getting crazy like this?’ Hey you teacher! Come to your senses and straighten up! Or you will not be any help to your wife. The poor child does not understand what you are saying and that is why he is not responding to you! And this teacher would act crazy and would continue to get angry at him. He would say, ‘speak up, kid, speak up, why are you not speaking anything?

Are you a dumb?’ And a teacher will punish him by asking him to hold his ear lobes by bending down and manipulating the arms through the flexed knees! Hey you crazy oaf!

Why do you keep doing such things? Many teachers do this. They charge fees for tuition like this, don’t they? Many teachers do this and then complain, ‘this boy has become my responsibility!’ Hey, this boy is not over your head, you are over his head. Can we not know that this boy is dull? So we should help him as much we can being mindful of his intellectual handicap, and not overload him. You may tell him to memorize a simple poem. And then if he does not speak then let him go. But this teacher will proclaim in anger, ‘he does not speak at all, he is dumb!’ ‘Hey you, he is not dumb.’ He does not understand what you are trying to tell him. That is why that poor boy has become blunt. If you keep on annoying-abusing him, 11

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you will traumatize him. He will become like the one who had an electric shock. You keep on thrusting-abusing him repeatedly for no reason! Now if he gets a wife who cannot understand him then what can happen? How can he live his whole life?

How can you measure the other person from your viewpoint?

Questioner: Do wrong results arise due to the insistence of wanting to make the other person understand whatever one has understood quickly?

Dadashri: One measures the other person through one’s own viewpoint. You should find out the other person’s viewpoint. What does other person’s viewpoint mean? It means to see with the vision that adjusts with everyone. One just keeps measuring the other person according to one’s own viewpoint. How many adjectives came forth in his angry outburst? ‘Are you dumb? Hey, why don’t you go ahead and die!’ He would tell him to die too. If the boy’s father hears this he would say, ‘Sir, please do not speak like that. He is our only son.’ The parents will turn against the teacher and pick a fight with him. Then the teacher will say, ‘I did the worrying and that verily is my mistake, isn’t it?’ Such mistakes used to happen before. Let me tell you about this.

One day Salio was sitting in a bullockcart. And Mango was riding that cart. Manga told, ‘hey Salia, there are deep holes in the road, so hang on to the nadu the waist string that ties the pajama to the waist, also a rope.

So Salio held his waist string. Then, as the cart went over a hole, Salio fell off the cart. Now Salio says, ‘hey you at least you should have told me.’ Then Mango says, ‘I had told you that hold on to that rope.’ So then what can happen if one grabs the wrong string? So one takes the beating because of one’s own lack of understanding. What Salio can do and what Mango can do?

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One needs to speak with a little child in child’s language Questioner: You talked about setting up this counter-pulley however this is a technical matter.

Dadashri: It is a technical matter.

Questioner: The pulley is set in this by employing the ego, but while talking with someone, one becomes so mechanical that he loses his awareness.

Dadashri: The human race is very definite. Human race is not crazy. Because of ignorance people talk like that. Otherwise no human being will tell this little four year old child that, ‘you do not have any sense. You do not understand me.’ How will one talk with a little child? People will talk with a little child in sweet and childish language. People will not talk with a three to four year old child as if he is an older child. Why they will not speak like that?

Questioner: One should talk with him in his own language.

Dadashri: One understands everything that this is a child’s language. Let us talk with a child in child’s language, or else the poor child will not be able to understand. One should talk to a little child thus, ‘look, this toy is exactly like that other toy, isn’t it? You had seen that, had you not?’ One should say like this two to four times. Then he will say, ‘Yes.’ Then you know that he understood. Now we have to talk to him in this manner. We know that this child’s brain is dull. We know that his situation is like a child so you should say ‘dear son, dear son.’

Questioner: But do we need to apply chetanta awareness of the Self in understanding the state of a child?

Dadashri: Oh, in the ignorant state also without chetanta, a mother carries out a April 2009

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beautiful vyavahar worldly interaction with her child. Does a mother not carry out a beautiful vyavahar with her child? Who taught her that?

Questioner: It is a natural thing.

Dadashri: It is not a natural thing. We do have such awareness within. But when he grows older, ego arises a lot. Then you think that he is grown up. Why he does like this? It would be like this for a little child, but would it be like this for an older child too? But you know that this older child is even more dull then the younger one. So if you think the older child is dull then you should know that he is like a three year old. So you should behave with him accordingly. But, you push and prod him from this side and that side. Then who would listen?

Friendly interaction with a child Questioner: How can you interact with children on their level; by becoming like them?

Dadashri: Do you act like a child in order to interact with your child? Children are afraid of their elders, so your behavior towards them should be such that they do not fear you.

You should point out your child’s mistakes by explaining things to him rather than intimidating him. You do not gain anything by intimidating children. Because they are younger than you, they will be easily frightened, but this will not get rid of their faults. Instead, their faults will increase internally. Only through explanation will you be able to rid them of their faults.

Questioner: Their mental development is less, isn’t it?

Dadashri: You should adjust with a little child according to his mental age. When ‘we’ talk with every child, we see what his mental age is and then we would answer. That is why we are saying that we set up a counter-pulley.

Therefore we do not have any clashes; we do not have any matabheda divisiveness due to April 2009

difference in opinion. We would see how his mental level, speech level, and physical level is.

According to his physical structure he looks older, his speech is strong, and he is brave. But his mental level is low. So we would decrease our revolutions. We have to accept that he is like a child only.

Questioner: I get into so much trouble with my older son. I do not understand when should I use a counter-pulley and what kind of counter-pulley should I install? And despite the keen desire not to enter into a clash, difficulties happen, so what should I do?

Dadashri: Oh, without the desire too, clash occurs. I am now showing you the way out of this. Gradually you should make adjustments in that direction.

Say for instance you talk to a ten year old boy then will he understand your talk or not? He may not understand some. Does that happen or not?

Questioner: Yes, indeed that is what happens, this is my experience that I am sharing.

This is my own question and this happens again and again to me.

Dadashri: Yes, that is why I am giving you this example. Suppose your son is twelve year old and you discuss everything with him.

He will understand some of the things you tell him and he will not understand the rest. He does not understand your viewpoint so you will have to calmly tell him, ‘This is my intention.

This is how I look at it. This is what I am trying to convey to you. Whether you understand it or not, please tell me about it later. And if there is anything about your viewpoint that I do not understand, then I will try my best to understand it.’ Talk to him in this way.

That is why I tell people that after the age of sixteen they should treat their child like a friend. If you speak to him as a friend, your tone will come out right, but if you behave as 13

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a father with him, you will not make any progress and conflicts will continue. What would happen when you behave as a father when he is forty?

Interact with a child employing the intellect like a child ‘No one should be hurt at all,’ that is the kind of intellect that needs to be maintained.

Even a child must not feel any hurt. One should interact with a child by becoming like a child.

What can happen if one uses his sharp intellect with a child? The poor child will get hurt. So this is the thing, nothing else.

Questioner: Then what kind of intellect buddhi should one employ with the seniors and the elders? Should one use sharp intellect with them?

Dadashri: With seniors and the elderly people one should employ the intellect like that of a child.

Questioner: Yes, the elderly are so set in their ways, and their thoughts are unyielding!

Dadashri: The elderly people have such unyielding thoughts. With them when you employ the intellect like that of a child then your current intellect will not hurt them.

Become a friend and set up a counterpulley thus Questioner: What kind of relation should be there between parents and children? How far should we interfere in the lives of youngsters who are growing up? Until what age and how should we interfere with them?

Dadashri: You should consider your son or daughter as your friend after he or she turns sixteen. Thereafter you should relinquish your rights as a father or a mother and live as a friend.

Questioner: If he begins doing something seriously wrong after he turns sixteen, where 14

he may possibly get hurt, then should I not interfere and block him?

Dadashri: Friend means friend, as a friend you can block and interfere with him.

Then you will not have a problem. It will create a problem if you end up doing it as a father.

Questioner: If I to make an effort to stop him as a friend and if he does not listen then should I let him do the wrong thing?

Dadashri: So then you have to let him do it. All this will go on. Otherwise if you ever hit him then he will revolt or he will conceal his fault. You should explain to him in a friendly manner, ‘son, what do we gain out of this?

Where is the benefit in this? You know you may end up in jail or you may suffer much consequences.’ You should not say this as a father or as a mother. Usually a father and a mother have an underlying force over a child, they should not exercise that force.

Questioner: If he talks such a way that hurts us and does not listen to us then should we stop giving him money or paying a college fee and all that?

Dadashri: No. That is a mandatory, it is a duty. You are duty bound. Even if he were to insult you, you have to give money. If you become a friend to your children, they will improve. But if you assert your authority as a parent, you will risk losing them. Your friendship should be such that the child will not go looking for comfort and guidance elsewhere. You should do everything a friend would do, with your child; play games, sports, drink tea together etc. Only then will he remain yours, otherwise you will end up losing him. Does any child accompany his father on the funeral pyre? These children are not really yours. Nature only makes them appear to be yours. First you should make the decision that you want to live with them as friends, and then you will be able to do so. If your friend is doing something wrong, how far will you go to caution him? You would only April 2009

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give him advice to the point where he listens, but you would not nag him. If he does not listen, then you would tell him that the decision is his. To be a friend to your child, you have to accept that from the worldly perspective you are his father, but in your mind you should think of yourself as his son. When the father comes down to the level of his child, he will be accepted as a friend. There is no other way to become a friend. Some people say this and their work gets done too.

Questioner: You have said that after our children turn sixteen we should become their friends. Why not become friends much earlier?

Dadashri: That would be very good, but you cannot be friends with them until they reach the age of ten or eleven. Until then, they may make mistakes and you will have to guide them and even discipline them if necessary. Those who have tried to exercise their authority as parents have failed miserably.

Dada gives the experiential key Every parent should make an effort to better his child, but these efforts should be fruitful. Although you have become a father, are you willing to relinquish that authority in order to improve your child? Can you give up your belief that you are his father?

Questioner: If there is scope for improvement, all attempts to improve him must be made without any ego, a sense of ‘doership’ or abhorrence.

Dadashri: You have to let go of the sense and feeling that you are his father.

Questioner: Am I to believe that he is not my son and I am not his father?

Dadashri: That would be the best thing.

Questioner: So how should a father be a true father? What should the father do to become a father?

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Dadashri: Let me give you an example to help you so that will allow you to make an adjustment. A distant nephew of mine had a son who was two to three years younger than me. He was the son of my nephew, so he would call me ‘Dada (term for grandfather)’.

So when I visit their place he would address me as ‘Dada, Dada, ’ with love. ‘Dada, how long you have been here? Dada, it is like this, it is like that.’ He would talk to me as if I was his own grandfather. So the pressure started to increase on my mind that this person keeps calling me Dada, Dada again and again so I felt that I was obliged to him that, ‘Oh, I became a Dada (grandfather), however I have not done anything for him.’ So then will tension increase or not?

Questioner: It will increase.

Dadashri: If this young man keeps calling Bapuji—respectful way of saying father, Bapuji, the whole day then the tension will increase. So I thought later that this will increase tension. So now what shall I do? Pressure will increase over my head day by day. He will keep calling me ‘Dada, Dada’. So how should I release this tension? Can such thing happen or not? If one receives so much reverence and respect, our attitude towards him becomes mild.

There will be softness towards him. So one then is hesitant to speak the truth. So this question had confused me at the age of twenty.

This is because I was a grandfather for many distant relative’s children. So they would address me ‘Dada, Dada’. Some people greet me thus casually and there I would not feel the load or the obligation. But this one (nephew’s son) would call me lovingly as if I was his grandfather, so I started feeling so much load. Then I wondered how to decrease this mental load. And if I tell him, ‘you do not call me Dada,’ then that is also wrong. He will say ‘if I do not call you Dada in vyavahar worldly interaction then what should I call you?’

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So it was confusion this way too and it was confusion that way too.

Some people greet me casually, while others heartily express their fondness and call me Dada. I have devised a way to reciprocate their feelings by balancing it out. When they address me as Dada, I would simultaneously in my mind, think of them as Dada, thus I would balance it out. Once I began to do this, I felt better. I felt lighter and people were more attracted towards me.

If I think of them as Dada, my words reach them and they feel delighted by the love and concern they receive from me. This is indeed a very subtle and important matter, which is worth understanding. You are fortunate to get this. If you can manage to do the same, it will be to your benefit. So then what did I do?

When such vyavahar continues then he will feel in his mind that he will not find a person like Dada.

Now he had an uncle and he was only five years older than him and he was of my age. Now his uncle used to stay with him when he came from Africa. When his uncle came at that time his wife would cook vedhami (wheaten cake with stuffing of mashed slit pulse and jaggery), doodhpak, shrikhand (kind of sweet dish made of curd and sugar), poori, tea and varieties of snacks. Then later at night, he would say, ‘show me your account. You get this much pay and how can you afford all this?’ That uncle would continue to enjoy delicious food and complain about this, that if you keep spending this kind of money then how will you be able to survive, how can you afford all this with your job? Whenever he would visit his nephew he would eat the feast type food and hassle and harass the nephew. That poor nephew would think that his uncle has come from overseas, so let us feed him a good meal and that uncle would not stay without fighting.

And he would reprimand him as his father 16

would reprimand him. How can one live a life like this? You can’t, can you? So that poor nephew got tired of his uncle. This uncle harasses me. This nephew had incurred a debt of about one to two thousand rupees. So his uncle told him once, ‘I am ready to pay off your debt. Tell me how much you owe? And who do you owe money to?’ So that nephew thought that this uncle’s attitude is wrong so I am not going to tell him anything. So he did not tell his uncle the truth. That nephew would tolerate out of shame. Poor fellow would not speak up and would suffer in silence. He did not feel the slightest love for his uncle.

So then his uncle started to tell me, he is my nephew. He says to me, ‘what does he understand, this is a debt, I want to give him half of that debt, I want to give him about thousand rupees but he says no. What kind of a person is he?’ I said, ‘this world is also of a new kind. Either he does not know how to be a nephew or you do not know how to be an uncle. There is some mistake in this.’ Then that uncle says, ‘he does not tell me anything at all, he does not get help for his sickness.

What a shameless person he is!’ I said, ‘he is not like that brother, I do not believe that he is like that.’ Then he says, ‘Do you trust him.’ I said, ‘I have a hundred percent trust in him.’

During that time the nephew came down stairs.

He was going out. I said, ‘brother, come here, do you have a debt?’ Then he says, ‘Yes, I do have a debt.’ I asked him, ‘how much debt do you have?’ Then he says, ‘Dada, I owe this person, that person, counting all these in I have a debt about sixteen to seventeen hundred rupees, it is not big.’ Then I told him, ‘good, you can go.’ Then I told his uncle, ‘see, you are saying that he is an unworthy person. He is a worthy person.’ Then his uncle told me, ‘How does he confess with you and he is not telling me anything. You did some trick. He does not have any affection towards me, even if I try to give.’ I said, “He will not take, no one April 2009

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will take. You are ready to give after twisting, hurting the finger and forcibly making him extend his hand in a begging gesture. Your attitude is ‘I am giving you fifty rupees, go and give it to decrease your debt, now hold out your hand and I will give you another fifty’.”

So hey, ‘this one is a Kshatriya (the warrior class). He will sell the house but he will not take anything from you in this manner.’ Would he take like this?

Dada—superior grandfatherly attitude. Such thing would never occur; I would have only love for him. Reprimand arises when one becomes fixed with one’s own viewpoint ekantik only. That is the same as becoming the grandfather-dada. He then becomes the grandson and then difficulties commence.

Then he says, ‘you do have some technique.’ I said, ‘You are using your authority as an uncle. Here comes a great uncle! You do not know how to walk and yet are behaving like a great uncle.’ Then he says, ‘have you not become a ‘Dada’?’ I said, ‘when he calls me Dada then I would think of him as Dada in my mind.’ This is how I add or subtract internally. He can tell me Dada openly, but I cannot address him as Dada openly because it would appear odd to the world.

Questioner: Nowadays if a father wants to live with his son then he should live as if he is the son of the son, that is the only way.

There is no other trick or magic. You are his uncle so make him your uncle. Will you use such a trick? Everything works just fine in this manner in this world.

People need to have such kinds of skill.

One has become a father just like that. A father should be such that his son would not like to move away from him. I think of him as my grandfather so when he comes to me he does not like to move away from me and when we go out of town then he would make my bed first than he would make the bed for his uncle.

See, he told me how much debt he has. His uncle was shocked. He says, ‘you are using some kind of a key.’ I told him, ‘see, my key.’

Can you not learn such a thing?

This is just that this topic just unfolded!

This special thing about inner addition and subtraction. This will help you. You watch; this will become a big miracle. Every sentence of mine will work miracles.

One does not ruin one’s own thing in this. This is just that you act like a father with ekantik individualized perspective! Hey, keep it anekant (accepting of different views, universal acceptance). So on that day at the younger age I had decided that this inner load is increasing so I thought of him internally as ‘Dada’. I would call him ‘Dada’ even before he addresses me as ‘Dada.’ I would call him so in the mind, and its subtle result is that he would not feel inferior. I have never instigated or I have never reprimanded him becoming April 2009

Now tell me, how can one learn to become a father of a son until he attains such understanding?

Dadashri: Yes. When he calls me Dada at that time I would take him- think of him as Dada—grandfatherly and respectful. If plusminus takes place in this manner then there is no subtle disrespect-scorn towards him. I would not have the awareness that I am a grandfather.

This is also an art, isn’t it? I learnt this art at my younger age.

Questioner: How old were you at that time?

Dadashri: I was about twenty to twentytwo years old. I know that if I become a grandfather then my intoxication would increase and his would decrease. When can he reach to that level? He would say, ‘welcome Dada, 17

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welcome Dada, so I became a Dada (grandfather).’ If you turn this name around then also it is Dada, I do not want that kind of Dada. Dissolve by adding and subtracting.

Otherwise superiority-laden scorn will arise against the person.

Questioner: The father wonders why his son does not adjust to him.

Dadashri: That is because he continues to assert his authority as a father. This is wrong.

The belief of fatherhood in itself is false. The belief that one is a husband is also wrong.

It is your mistake that you listen that you are ‘the respected person’ in the home. You do not give importance to that word at all. He may say those compliments and that is not a problem. But you do not listen to that if a disease creeps in and if it does not happen then you can listen at ease. Otherwise you do plus-minus by saying you are the older one to be respected and I am the junior one and then the burden will not increase and everybody will be happy.

Did you understand about this plus and minus? If you can learn this system of doing addition and subtraction then accept it.

Bad effects of speech Questioner: In many homes, the family members argue but their hearts and minds are pure.

Dadashri: Speech that creates conflict will have an impact on a person’s heart. If one can remain superficial about it, then no harm is done. It’s like this, the mind and the heart of the one who speaks may be pure but the listener may feel as though a stone has been thrown at him, and so a conflict will arise. Conflict will arise wherever bad words are used.

Questioner: Sometimes it does not affect the opposite person.

Dadashri: One is affected. He would show off, that is it. Everything will affect inside.

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Mind is a very subtle thing. When a bad word comes forth it will not stay without affecting other person. Words always wound the heart.

Some people speak such words that would make the other person have a heart attack. There are people of all different kinds. The speech is a very difficult thing. If there are no words then one can get his work—liberation done. If these hurtful words did not exist then moksha is natural. In this kaal times there is bondage because of speech only. Therefore one should not speak even a word for anybody.

Questioner: You had said that the speech should be like what you say when you talk to a child.

Dadashri: Yes, of that kind. Why do you take care when you talk to a little child? If there is a little child then you speak with him using a counter-pulley. Even if you were angry you would change immediately.

We should live our life in such a way that no one feels the slightest scorn tarchhod.

‘Counter-pulley’ is the method of taking an adjustment You should not voice your opinion first; first ask what the other person thinks. If the other person insists on his viewpoint, I let go of mine. I only consider one thing, that I hurt no one. Take into consideration the other person’s viewpoint and do not try to force your opinion on them. I have taken everyone’s opinion and only then have I become a Gnani. If I ever try to impose my viewpoint on anyone, I would become weak. No one should be hurt because of your opinion. Your revolutions may be at eighteen hundred per minute and the other person’s maybe at eight hundred, so if you impose your opinion on the other person, his engine will breakdown and the gears will need to be repaired.

Learn how to install a fuse All you have to know is how to fix the April 2009

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fuse on a machine if it blows up. You must know how to adjust with people’s prakruti.

For me, even when the other person blows his fuse, my adjustment is always there. But what happens when the other person does not know how to adjust? He loses his fuse and gets into a conflict with everyone until someone fixes his fuse, but until then his confusion remains.

Questioner: What about when people say, ‘You are like this and you are like that?’

So then how should I take adjustment there?

Dadashri: People can say whatever they want to, but the effect of ‘I am like that’ should not happen. ‘I am pure soul’ is the only meditation that should remain and persist for You. Not a single contemplation chintavan of the self goes to waste. It is good that such contemplation happens at a gross level and things get by. Subtle high-level contemplation of evolved beings is of five thousand revolutions per minute. Everyone has a different type of contemplation. Thus there are infinite types of contemplations. That is why you see all kinds of people in this world.

Nature of worldly life Sansar (the worldly life) is nothing but a betrayal. In it, no one is related to you. If a person were to clearly understand the terrible misery of worldly life, he would have an intense desire for liberation. This terrible misery of the world is a counterweight for liberation.

Today, a person may find the world fearfully miserable and yet because of the illusion he continues to suffer its repeated blunt beating. He continues to put up with the beatings saying, ‘Things will improve tomorrow,’ but does brass ever turn into gold? No, it will never turn to gold. That is why it is important to understand its horrible misery for once and for all. As it is, one is under a false belief that he can derive happiness from the world; ‘I will be happy if I April 2009

do this’. Alas! Even here, one is subject to a beating. This is a very profound fact that ‘We’ are telling you. The world perpetuates and remains in existence because of all other superficial talks.

If the Gnani Purush were to merely describe the terrible misery of this world, one will definitely begin to question, ‘Is the world so terrible? There is no way to escape from it.

We must solve it once and for all.’ You can become free from the worldly entanglements through submission. ‘Yes sir. Yes, sir’ is what you have to do in order to disentangle yourself.

This world is such that it calls for settling all matters with equanimity.

Overdraft used up in advance A man may own several homes and yet not have even five rupees in his pocket while walking around arrogantly as if was the king of Bhavnagar. What good is such an ego?

Questioner: But Dada often it happens that when people act this way, they get everything.

Dadashri: They do but they bind demerit karma in the process. The rule (karmic) is that you use up all that you have and when you run out, if you borrow on your strength and create an overdraft, that overdraft will take you to the animal kingdom. So it is worthless taking anything by means of persuasion, it will only lead to your demise. Whatever material wealth comes your way must be that which your merit karmas bring forth naturally.

People acquire wealth but it is through an overdraft. People are constantly preoccupied with thoughts of stealing, lying and deceit, and this binds nothing but demerit karma. People should not have such intents, even when they acquire material wealth and comfort. That is why I was ready to renounce everything; if this is what led people to bind demerit karma then it would be better to 19

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renounce the worldly life. There is nothing but intense suffering and torment. Even if a man of insight, who did not have self-realization, was to suffer intensely just for an hour, he too would be ready to give up everything. Those with lesser intelligence will understand suffering to a lesser degree but how can the one with astute intelligence tolerate it at all? This indeed is astonishing.

Restlessness is a counterweight You will not see anywhere in the world, as fully developed anger-pride-illusion-greed as you see in India and these people have such inner restlessness which you will not find it anywhere else in the world. Whatever the strength of the intellect, however much the intellect has developed, that is how much should be the restlessness. That is the counterweight.

Then one says, ‘Where is the happiness in this?’ He has a car; a bungalow etc. but there is also restlessness to go along with them.

Therefore, happiness must lie somewhere else.

Therefore, his imagination looks somewhere else, recognizing that happiness lies in liberation. He realizes that it lies in the nonpossession of worldly things (aparigrah).

These are very aware people and that is why they have so much misery. There is no other misery here.

Then after a while if she says, ‘No you have not stolen anything,’ then again tell her, ‘You are correct.’ If your wife asks you to get her a sari worth of one hundred and fifty rupees then you should give her twenty-five rupees extra. That will last at least six months, you have to understand this.

The reality is that your entire life span is equivalent to just one day of Brahma (Creator in Hindu mythology). If you are to live just one day of Brahma, then why create all this commotion? If you were to live a hundred years of Brahma, then it is understandable if you question why you should have to adjust. On the contrary you can challenge your opponents to file claims against you. But we are talking about just one day of Brahma and so you have to resolve everything in a short time. If you have to accomplish a task in a short time, what must you do? Resolve it quickly by adjusting; otherwise will it not drag on? When you fight with your wife, are you able to sleep well at night? No, and the next morning you do not even get a good breakfast.

Nut and bolt: Wrong threads Questioner: I try very hard to adjust with my wife, but I am not able to.

What is the greatest suffering of all? It is the suffering that stems from inability to adjust. What is wrong in practicing the principle of adjust everywhere in those situations?

Dadashri: Everything is a repayment.

When the threads of a bolt are crooked, how is it possible to fit a bolt with straight threads into it? You may ask yourself, ‘Why is the woman like this?’ But woman is really your counterweight. Her awkwardness is in proportion to the degree of your faults. So this is all vyavasthit, do I not tell you this?

Questioner: For that we need to make an effort.

Questioner: It seems that everyone has come to sort me out and shape me up!

Dadashri: No effort is needed. All you have to do is follow my Agna, tell yourself, “Dada has told me to, ‘Adjust everywhere,’ and then continue to do so.” If your wife says, ‘You are a thief,’ then tell her, ‘You are correct.’

Dadashri: You need to shape up. The world cannot function without people shaping up, can it? If you do not shape up, how will you become a father? Shape up and then you can become a father.

Time is short then why all this commotion?

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Wife is a counterweight ‘Wife is the counterweight of a husband’.

If that counterweight is not there, then man would fall.

Questioner: I do not understand. Please explain.

Dadashri: Counterweights are installed in engines. The engine will break down without these counterweights. In the same way, women are the counterweight of men. Without a wife to stabilize a husband, the man will fall. He will run around everywhere, without any purpose.

He comes home because of the woman.

Otherwise, would he? She is his counterweight.

Women are the counterweight for men and if it is not enough then daughters are their counterweight. It will not do without a counterweight. Otherwise men will fall.

Adopt the Gnani’s technique One night the wife pleads with her husband to buy her a sari. He asks her how much it is and she tells him that it costs only 2200 rupees. Her husband tells her that if it cost 200 or 300 rupees, he would gladly buy it for her, but how could they afford such an expensive sari? The wife gets upset and begins to sulk. What kind of a problem has been created? He even begins to regret getting married. What use is regret after the fact?

This is suffering.

Questioner: Are you saying that the husband should buy her the 2200-rupee sari?

keep 100 rupees for himself and give her the rest. Would she be likely to buy herself a sari then? He could then even afford to tease her about buying a sari. Then the decision to buy the sari would be hers. If the decision rested on him, she would continue to pressure him. I learnt this art before I attained Gnan. It was much later that I became a Gnani. I acquired Gnan after I discovered ways of dealing with difficult situations. You have problems because you do not have this approach. Did you understand this? The fault is all yours. You must learn this art.

Work can get done easily through counter-pulley Questioner: One carries out worldly interaction without using a counter-pulley, what does it mean?

Dadashri: That pump will break down.

If an engine has fifteen hundred revolutions, and it is connected with a pump with three hundred revolutions, then will it not break that pump?

Questioner: That is correct, Dada.

Dadashri: Otherwise matabheda divisiveness due to difference in opinion will arise. It will break the pump. Matabheda will arise. We would set up a counter-pulley. We know that this person is a Vanio (usually a Jain businessman) and he has this many revolutions so I would set up a counter-pulley according to his revolutions and then I would talk.

Dadashri: It all depends upon him whether to buy it or not. Her disgruntled attitude will continue and every night she will threaten not to cook. From where will he get another cook? He will have to buy it even if he has to borrow the money.

Questioner: We are not able to do that.

We have trouble with that. We are not able to set that counter-pulley the way you are setting automatically.

He should make the situation such that she herself would not want to buy the sari. If he was earning 800 rupees a month, he should

Questioner: But we are not getting such awareness. We just go on with our revolutions so everywhere it creates interference and

April 2009

Dadashri: We understand that this much counter-pulley is required.

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interference, fights, breaking and exploding take place.

Dadashri: You do not know how to keep the counter-pulleys then what can happen?

Questioner: Yes. So what should we do for that? Can you please show us so we can be done with it?

Dadashri: If you set a counter-pulley then you can accomplish.

Questioner: Yes, but we think about that counter-pulley after clashing and taking the beating. It occurred again since we did not have a counter-pulley. But during that time everything would break and explode, machine would shatter.

Dadashri: When the machine breaks then know that the counter-pulley was not set.

And when you set a counter-pulley, then that pump will not break and it will pull water beautifully.

Understand this science and bring about solution You did understand this talk about a counter-pulley, didn’t you?

Questioner: Yes, so we have to match with that other person’s speed.

Dadashri: Yes. Otherwise it will break it. If you have a pump that operates at fifteen hundred revolutions and the engine has a capacity of three thousand horsepower and if you connect with a belt which runs at three thousand revolutions then it will break. It will tear apart. So you have to calculate and set a counter-pulley in between, so that three thousand revolutions will convert to fifteen hundred. Then that pump will continue to run.

Questioner: As you are saying I have to come down to his level and talk to him by setting a counter-pulley.

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Dadashri: No, you should take adjustment in such a way that it would reach the other person. Would you not understand that you have three thousand revolutions and other person has fifteen hundred? Such are these humans. A businessman has five thousand revolutions and a servant has five hundred revolutions, so he will tell the servant, ‘you are senseless, stupid, an ass!’ Hey mooah, if he was not stupid then why would he come to work for you? And a servant should not tell that businessman that, ‘am I at the place of a stupid person, at this place of an ass! You do not even know a stupid person?’ Now this is how it is in the worldly life. So if one has fifteen hundred revolutions then the other person has to set a counter-pulley to match with other person’s revolutions. How can one set a counter-pulley? To set this, one has to install a bigger pulley and connect with a smaller pulley in such a way that a bigger pulley will have fewer revolutions. So there will be fifteen hundred revolutions on a bigger pulley. Thus the revolutions of a bigger pulley will convert into fifteen hundred and match with the revolutions of a smaller pulley and the pump will continue to run. This is just that one does not know how to set a counter-pulley that is why he keeps taking a beating.

It is better to remain silent there Questioner: What should I do if my revolutions are fifteen hundred and the other person’s revolutions are three thousand?

Dadashri: You should keep silent there.

It is better to remain silent. The moment you speak they will drag you. The wise one is the one who remains silent. The wisdom, which exists in silence, does not exist in anything else.

If one does not know anything then it is better if he remains silent. And the one who knows more, he will continue to speak.

Result will come when you decide If we have more light then we can make April 2009

DADAVANI

it dim but we cannot increase the light of the one who has dim light. If you have more light then you should dim your light and then sit with this person. If you have more light then know how to get the work from this person, don’t you make such adjustments? Similarly you have to take adjustment everywhere. You have to take adjustment, there is infinite energy.

If you say on the name of Dada that, ‘Oh Dadaji, may it will fit me then it will instantly fit you and it is decided in your deep inner intent that no one should get hurt to the slightest extent. If you have decided like that then no one will get hurt whatsoever.’ So you have to make a decision.

Questioner: I want to know that how a person with low revolutions can install a counter-pulley.

Dadashri: One can set it with this Gnan.

When the opposite person speaks at that time one should stay in Gnan only. So let the other person continue to talk. Otherwise that fellow will continue to get confused and if you stay in Gnan then he will not get confused. The older person can work with an older person, and the older person can set a counter-pulley and work with a younger person.

just that you have to continue to observe ‘us’ that how ‘we’ are taking adjustment with everybody. You have to set slowly and slowly and decide that you want to set a counterpulley then it will happen accordingly.

One can get the closure through this science Everybody does not have the energy to understand completely. This is because of the lack of grasping power. Everyone’s grasping power is different. One needs to understand me for one minute, and one needs to sit with me for just one hour only. But from where one can bring that much focused energy? One should have as much horsepower—revolutions as possible in order to understand and receive this from the Gnani Purush. With the revolutions of ten thousand, multiple counter-pulleys are placed to come down to three hundred, so that the pump—receptive mind of the other works, otherwise, if the pulleys are removed, then that other will break—not work. You just have to get your ‘work’ done. And I on the other hand have that many revolutions only. Until these puzzles of yours are solved, your revolutions will not increase.

Questioner: But how can we install a counter-pulley exactly? What is its method?

One will have to know this science systematically and then closure will come.

Dadashri: There is not any method. It is

~Jai Sat Chit Anand

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