dn the
dailynebraskan.com
good semester
BAD SEMESTER
monday, december 16 2013
The semester is nearly over. Is your life, too? Use this flowchart to determine how successful your fall was. Good luck.
ST AR
T
volume 113, issue 073
Tyler Keown and Shelby Fleig
dn
Look back at your semester. Well, good luck with everything.
Good semester, bud! OK.
2.0 GPA So you get to keep your scholarship?
Yep!
3.0 GPA
HOW WELL DID YOU DO?
Real bad.
Did you do well in class?
Yes.
HOW BAD DID YOU DO?
No.
Yeah.
4.0 GPA
GREAT JOB!
Maybe we should be reading your flowchart.
Did you party a lot?
Maybe.
Yeah.
!
Thanks
One of what?
Does your mom still love you?
Pretty bad.
ARE YOU GOING TO STAY IN SCHOOL? No.
Oh, you’re just one of “those...?”
DID YOU NOT GET INVITED?
No, I did.
You know what? Never mind. Let’s just say you had a good semester.
No
There’s a 50/50 chance this is either the start of a great journey or the worst thing to ever happen to you.
Yeah!
Nope.
DID YOU DRINK RESPONSIBLY?
Not that I know of.
Not even one?
Get better friends!
I mean, some do.
My friends don’t party.
Why not?
No.
For shame! Bad semester!
Yes.
That’s good of you. I don’t know.
So, bad semester?
OK.
Bad semester.
Everything in moderation.
Chill with them.
Good semester because it ends with promise.
Maybe next semester will be better.
Did you read the DN regularly? Bad semester. See you in hell.
No.
! s e Y
Wait, big question.
What?
Great semester. We mean it. Have a great break and see you in January!