Teton Valley Weddings ♥ February 17, 2011 ♥ Page C1 Teton Valley Weddings ♥ February 17, 2011 ♥ Page C1
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Secrets for a Successful, Long-lasting Marriage Green Wedding Tips Wedding Planning on the Web Where to Skimp & Where to Splurge on Your Wedding
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Multipurpose Mason Jar Tips for Having your dog in Your Wedding Honeymoon On A Budget
Photo by Kisa Koenig
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Teton Valley Weddings
Jamye Chrisman 208.399.7662
www.jamyechrismanphotography.com
Professional catering for any event Established 1993
ou really can live happily ever after Erica Burns / Marital therapist
February 17, 2011
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Getting hitched
What you need is to have a conscious relationship. Here are some ideas to help you do that:
Ah, your wedding. As you plan for your special day you, no doubt, are experiencing a myriad of emotions. Elation about finding your special mate, anticipation of a glorious My Reality, day, excitement about the Your Erica J. Burns, M.A., new adventure of your Licensed Clinical Reality Professional Counselor partnership. Depending First, now that and Life Coach on where you are in the you are past that process, you may also be rapture stage, it is time to experiencing some other realize and accept that your partner’s feelings such as being overwhelmed at experience is not identical to yours. dealing with all the details, annoyance Operate from a place of curiosity when it with trying to fulfill everyone’s varied comes to your spouse. Wonder about their expectations and desires, and maybe internal experience. When you’ve been even some doubt about whether you are together for several years you may believe making the right choice in marrying your that you know everything about them, beloved. what they think, believe and feel about any given situation or experience. What you When we are in the initial romantic are really doing is assuming things about stage of relationship we think that these your partner. Be continuously open to wonderful feelings we have for our learning about your partner. One way to partner will never change. There are several reasons for this. First, our culture foster this openness is to get a book like “Talk To Me, 1777 Intimate Questions” fosters this perception by giving us no by Bonnie Sose and spend time getting to examples in literature, film or TV of know each other as you did when you first a healthy longterm relationship. Love got together. stories end either with the couple going blissfully off into the sunset or one or both of them dying tragically before the Communication bloom of romance has faded. Second, Often when couples have been together in the early stage of relationship, we for a long time they feel that they are are literally under the influence of a “love having trouble communicating. Often this is cocktail.” Our brains are flooded with not really the problem. When couples are wonderful stimulating and soothing yelling at each other, sitting and pouting, chemicals such as oxytocin, sometimes called the bonding chemical, phenylethylamine or storming out the door in anger, they are communicating plenty. The real (PEA), an amphetamine-like naturally problem is reactivity. When people occurring neurotransmitter, are coming from a reactive place as well as several they are operating more from other excitatory their reptile fight or flight neurotransmitters such brain. They are then not as dopamine and able to clearly think norepeinephrine. about what they feel for This is mother the other or what they nature’s way desire. Their reactive of getting us response merely together. The triggers counter purpose of reactivity from the this euphoria partner. Then both is to bond us people are feeling so emotionally and unsafe they are unable physically to a to resolve their issue. person who offers One of the best ways to us the possibility of stay in connection and growth and healing. be able to communicate Neuroscientists effectively is to work on your believe that the brain own reactivity and learn ways to cannot maintain this level not trigger reactivity in your partner. of excitation forever, thus within If you can learn to contain your own several months to two years our brains reaction to what your partner is saying return to normal. or doing you will be able to consciously Since you are getting married, you’ve respond to them. probably been together long enough to be past that infatuation stage of relationship. You have most likely had your first or Humor perhaps many instances of disagreement Have a sense of humor in your or what in Imago Relationship Therapy relationship, but be very careful that we call power struggles. Since you are going your humor is not at your partner’s ahead with your commitment to each expense. It’s great to be able to laugh at other you have weathered them well yourself, not take yourself too seriously enough. Having some information about and let your partner know when you catch what to expect after you walk down the yourself doing so. aisle can greatly facilitate your ability to navigate the rough waters that inevitably arise in marriage. Many of us have not Criticism and Desire had healthy relationships modeled for One of the most powerful ways to avoid us, often coming from dysfunctional or conflict and maintain a positive, loving divorced families ourselves. The divorce connection with your partner is to learn rate is over 50 percent and even greater how to handle situations where you or for second marriages. Interestingly, your spouse feel critical of the other. research indicates that couples who have You can avoid a myriad of difficulties if premarital education have a 30 percent you learn this simple way of managing lower chance of getting divorced. So, your own or your partner’s complaints. a little bit of education can go a long Learn that criticism or complaint is always way towards helping you have the loving just a desire for something different. relationship you are dreaming of. Whenever you wish to complain to
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Photo by Kisa Koenig Photography
Teton Valley Weddings
10 tips for a successful plan Lisa Nyren / Managing editor
File photo
or criticize your partner, send the information to them in the form of a desire. Instead of complaining that your partner “never” takes the trash out, tell him/her in a loving way how good you would feel if they did. If your partner does not do the same for you, and criticizes you, instead of getting reactive, take some deep breaths, or a walk around the block if you need to, and then from a loving place ask them what they desire from you. If you can give them what they want, do so. If not, apologize and tell them why. Sex One of the complaints that couples have most often about each other is that their partner is either wanting too much sex or not enough. Part of this problem has to do with the fact that that wonderful love cocktail has worn off. In the romantic stage those chemicals induce high levels of libido in both genders. Often initially women are as interested in frequent sex as men but when the chemicals decrease so may her desire. In addition, women have much less testosterone than men resulting in much lower sex drives. Finally, when women have children, biology intervenes yet again. Their hormonal levels shift from urging women towards procreation to encouraging them to nurture and nourish their new dependent offspring. A healthy functional relationship includes a strong, mutually satisfying sex life. This is one area where couples usually need to spend some extra time and energy nourishing their connection. Both wife and husband need to understand what makes their partner feel truly loved and connected. Reading some good books on this subject, such as Patricia Love’s “Hot Monogamy” or Tammy Nelson’s “Getting the Sex You Want”, can help you have the intimate relationship you need. It is generally true that men feel loved when their partner is sexually intimate and women feel loved when their partner is verbally intimate. Giving your partner what they want can go a long way towards getting what you want. Love notes that what can keep a monogamous relationship hot is novelty and risk. This is why an affair can be so exciting. Learning some new tricks and having high energy fun in an exciting activity can help to keep your sex life vibrant. A note about affairs. Affairs are often not as much about sex as they are about feeling seen, heard, attractive and alive. Anne and Brian Bercht of Beyond Affairs Network state that affairs happen when opportunity meets vulnerability. Often people have affairs when they are struggling with other things in their lives such as confronting their own aging (what we often call a mid-life crisis), change in employment status, grieving a loss or wanting to feel valuable. To avoid an affair share with your partner right away any emotional or physical attraction you feel towards another and never share intimacies of any kind with another which you would not tell your spouse about. Be happily everafter continued on C5
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’m getting married in August. My fiance and I got engaged last April and since then it’s been an interesting journey through wedding planning world. The most important thing I’ve learned so far is that you can actually have a nice, informal wedding without maxing out your credit card. I’m a bride on a budget. We’re a couple on a budget. And we’re good at it. Lyle and I have been living together for about eight years, and since then I don’t think there’s ever been a time where we looked at each other and said, “Wow, we have more money than we know what to do with!” (I haven’t given up on Powerball just yet.) Anyway, this wedding issue features modern, budgetfriendly wedding ideas that can be environmentally friendly and elegant at the same time. All or some of that can be done locally here in Teton Valley, and it can be done using online and out-of-state resources as well. Either way, we hope this issue of Teton Valley Weddings makes it a little easier for you to coordinate a wonderful wedding day. Here are some ideas to consider when you plan your wedding: First, set a budget before you set out on your search for a venue, a baker, a dress, etc. At least have a general idea of how much you want to spend. Second, sit down with your fiance and decide what you both want your wedding to look like and be like. This will allow you both to have the same “vision” throughout the planning process. Third, include your immediate family members and close friends in your planning; they will be more than happy to help and, when it’s all over, you’ll be more than happy they did. Fourth, refrain from buying every wedding magazine on the rack at Barnes and Noble. They call that stuff “wedding porn,” and it’s nice to look at but not very practical. Too much of it will make you second guess every decision you make. Fifth, do not buy the first dress you try on. The ladies at the stores will tell you you look stunning in everything they can zip you into. Instead, head to wedding boutiques, ignore the oohs and ahhs from the commission-only sales women, take pictures with your smart phone, and compare after you get home and unload your groceries from WinCo. Sixth, consider all your options. We live in a digital world that makes physically living in Teton Valley, Idaho as convenient as living in Salt Lake City or any other metropolis. Companies will ship anything to your doorstep, and that means possibilities for area brides don’t end with Hart’s Tux and Gown in Idaho Falls. (See Wedding planning on the Web page, C4). Seventh, book in advance. Seriously, many venues take reservations two years out. Bakers will also need notice, as will caterers and rental stores and even out-of-town guests. Eighth, remember your wedding day is just that: A day. It’s sounds very Dr. Phil to say, but what really matters is the marriage and lifetime commitment that comes after the party lights go out. Ninth, don’t take on more than you can handle (this may make you a prime candidate for Bravo’s “Bridezilla” TV show and nobody wants that, do they?) Tenth, have fun and remember this will be one of the best days of your life.
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edding planning on the Web This list is by no means comprehensive, but it’s enough to get you started on your web-based wedding planning. Don’t forget to check out all our local shops and vendors too!
preownedweddingdresses.com Start your dress search
here. Probably the most well-known used and new gown site, this site is easy to navigate and lets you save dresses to a want list so you can watch the listing prices before you buy.
Dresses, decor, planning ideas etc.
projectwedding.com A forum for advice, inspiration and,
bravobride.com A website for brides to buy, sell or rent
of course, classifieds.
everything from wedding gowns to folding chairs.
recycledbride.com Eco-friendly and easy to use, you can find anything here including highlights of the best deals.
eBay.com Tried and true, don’t forget about your favorite
auction-style website when you’re looking for wedding attire and supplies.
weddingbee.com A blog/classifieds/forum/inspiration
etsy.com Handmade and vintage stuff made and sold by
artsy people.
theknot.com Famous for its wedding magazine,
theknot.com offers the latest fashions, news and trends in the world of weddings. marthastewartweddings.com It’s trendy, but there’s
a reason for that. Martha has put everything from real weddings to party planning tips to proper etiquette for almost any situation all in one, helpful place. Plus, she offers templates for do-it-yourself weddings for things such as invitations, place cards, banners and even a photobooth backdrop. dresses, Once Wed also offers photos and stories of real weddings as well as DIY ideas and inspiration.
100layercake.com A blog featuring DIY projects, unique ideas and vendor options
Sites that will help you stick to your budget
wedding photos
2000dollarwedding.com A blog of thrifty ideas that
snippetandink.com A great place for unique ideas. Sign
actually work. (This woman actually pulled off a $2,000 wedding … and she had a blast doing it!)
oncewed.com Primarily a site to buy and sell new and used
Inspiration and such
wedding website all in one. Wedding Bee’s blog features real brides either in the process of planning or wrapping up their wedding experiences. Classifieds list everything from dresses to glass- and table-wear to reception decor and everything in between. Be careful, though, make sure you know the going rate for a particular item before you buy. (Just because it’s not on the official Pottery Barn website doesn’t mean your not getting charged Pottery Barn prices).
brokeassbride.com Thrifty ideas with a sense of humor. weddingsonabudgetblog.com Budget-friendly ideas and
plans for weddings of all types.
cutoutandkeep.net A place to learn and share craft
projects and other ideas
instructables.com Good for wedding projects and
everything else. Step-by-step instructions for making things. offbeatbride.com Random musings, ideas and real
up for their email list and get a daily Snippet in your inbox! theunbride.com Off-the-beaten-path ideas and real
wedding posts with photos and stories.
wemetinabar.com Random ideas, photos and musings.
ake your wedding green
ecessionappropriate registries
Anna Sachse / CTW Features
your honeymoon. Use a Carbon Calculator (find one on GreenBrideGuide. com) to determine your event’s footprint and buy equivalent offsets from Brighter Planet. “We also offer eco-friendly gift registries with free carbon-neutral shipping,” Harrison says.
Whether your goal is a few simple substitutions or a more advanced overhaul, here are eight ways to go green on your big day.
Nola Sarkisian-Miller / CTW Features
In these uncertain times, is it necessary to register for $80 gravy stands, $235 crystal water pitchers or $35 organic bath towels?
“This is one of the nicest things couples can do, picking their favorite charity, maybe in honor of a close relative who passed away,” says Julie Pryor, owner of Pryor Events in West Los Angeles, Calif. “Couples won’t know how much money is spent and it’s great, especially for those couples that have everything they need.”
When tackling their registry, it’s a question that may confound couples-to-be who may be grappling with an unfamiliar feeling — guilt. For weddings past, registries represented a win/win gift solution for couples-to-be and their guests, giving the betrothed an opportunity to pick what gifts they needed and wanted and taking the guesswork out of the equation for their friends and family.
Retailers are definitely not shying away from promoting the gift-buying bonanza. Macy’s is offering couples a $100 gift card just for registering with the department store. Bloomingdale’s, which posts its online registry with the WeddingChannel. com, also rolls out the perks, including free enclosure cards, free gifts and bonuses when registering with “select vendors” and invites to exclusive events where couples can mingle “with the similarly minded set.”
Now, as the job market crumbles and housing prices tumble, leaving folks financially stretched, the question is how greedy should a couple be when selecting paraphernalia for the new household they build? “We’re recommending that couples register for a range of items touching on every price point,” says Charlie Penn, managing editor for WeddingChannel. com. “And, they should manage their registry, updating it and adding a few things with lower price points.”
If it’s any consolation to couples, friends and family are still spending sizable sums on presents. According to The Knot Wedding Network 2008 Gift Giver Survey, family members spend an average of $211 on gifts and friends shell out $116. And, the majority look to the registry with 69 percent of wedding gifts hailing from the nifty gift docket.
Penn says a new trend among guests is giving the couple a group gift. Maybe four or five guests will pool their resources and select a higher-priced gift, but end up saving money in the long run.
The key to keeping guests’ wallets flush is giving them options, Penn says.
Another alternative for those couples feeling squeamish about a $200 place settings is setting up a charity registry.
Copyright © CTW Features
Waste less paper Simple – Use tree-free or recycled paper for everything from invites to programs to seating cards, says Danielle Venokur, founder and principle planner for dvGreen, a sustainable event design company in New York.
Decorate sustainably
Grand Targhee Resort strives to create a green environment for your wedding locale.
Advanced – “Revisit traditions with a modern eye to avoid paper altogether wherever it’s appropriate for your particular event,” says Venokur. This can mean anything from providing a single seating chart instead of multiple cards, to using e-mail invites for events like the bachelor/ette parties, bridal showers or a casual rehearsal dinner.
Leave a smaller carbon footprint Simple – “Choose a location that is central to the majority of your guests, so that less people have to fly to your event,” says Kate L. Harrison, author of “The Green Bride Guide: How to Plan an Earth-Friendly Wedding on Any Budget” (Sourcebooks, 2008), and founder/CEO of GreenBrideGuide.com. In addition, try to select a venue that is easily accessible by public transportation and works for both the ceremony and reception. Advanced – Purchase carbon offsets for travel to your wedding, the big day itself and
Wedding Invitations
&
Accessories
For one of the biggest events in your life, you want only the best. Come see us for
accessories you’ll need for your special day.
Simple – “Rentals, in general, are a great way to be more environmentally conscious because you’re reusing,” says Harrison. Up the ante by renting linen from companies that use “green” dry cleaning and offer products made of eco-friendly materials,
such as hemp silk. Advanced – Capitalize on the season or a unique location to minimize extra décor, suggests Harrison. For example, a summer wedding that takes place in a garden will reduce the need for additional cut flowers, while a soiree held in a historic mansion can forgo extra electric lighting in favor of romantic candles or lanterns.
Use local, in-season florals Simple – Venokur suggests only springing for in-season flowers that are grown locally. Also, consider blossoms that have a big impact with less quantity. Advanced – “Think about the vessel, too,” says Venokur. Pass on products from China in favor of locally-made pottery or recycled glass. Or consider quirky non-floral centerpieces, like stacks of books and candles or buckets of fresh fruit that can double as a favor.
Copyright © CTW Features
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Teton Valley Weddings
February 17, 2011
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here to skimp, where to splurge Wedding pro Jane Dayus-Hinch shows how to budget on the fly Timothy R. Schulte / CTW Features In the U.K., Jane Dayus-Hinch is known for saving the big day on the TV show “Wedding SOS,” granting couples three wishes to make their special day extraordinary. In the real world, though, she knows a little extra planning smarts goes a long way. Here are her tips for where to skimp and where to splurge.
Where to Skimp Flowers: Some brides spend up to 20 percent of their budget on flowers, but with careful planning, flowers can serve a “dual” purpose, such as using the same arrangement on the singing table and head table. Cake: Instead of having a full-fruit or three- or four-tiered cake, have the bottom tier in fruit as the base, and then have flavored sponge cakes or even cup
cakes to reduce the cost. As long as there is a piece per guest, the rest is just waste and decoration.
relationships can be for a lifetime. Always book a professional photographer for the best results.
Dress: Brides always choose the most expensive dress they think is appropriate. Now there are more dressmakers willing to copy any dress for a fraction of the cost. You may want to look like a princess, but do you have a royal budget?
Food & Drinks: What most people remember about weddings is the food they ate and the wine they drank, and you will be judged on how “hospitable” you were. You can cut some of the courses, but when budgeting, allow for “extras.”
Bridal Party: Is it really necessary to have 10 bridesmaids and groomsmen? Having a huge bridal party is an expense not only in clothing, shoes, flowers, etc., but also the gifts you are to give, as well. Go for quality, not quantity.
Entertainment: Please don’t chop the DJ and go for an mp3 player, it’s just not that same! To have a party, you need a band or DJ to make the party go with a swing.
Where to Splurge Photography: Getting a friend or relative to take the wedding photographs is a huge mistake. Not only is it very stressful for them, but if they are not what you want,
Wedding Planner/Emcee: After planning the most expensive day, you need someone in control and in charge of the timings and itinerary. Money well spent! © CTW Features
happily everafter continued from C3__________________________________ honest with one another about these feelings before you are drawn to act on them.
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Keeping the Love Alive Many books have been written about how to nourish and enrich a partnership. Some excellent suggestions culled from these are included here. Before you marry and at regular intervals in your journey, take time to sit down and actually ” write down a list of qualities you wish to have in your relationship. Compare and combine your lists and post them someplace where you can see them regularly.
Before you marry, talk to each other about important marital topics. These should include your feelings about having children, how many? when? What are tyour debts and assets and how will you deal with money together? What are your views on religion and how will you participate in religious activities? What fun activities do you want to do with each other? How do you feel about where you live and about the possibility of moving in the future? What are your relationships with your parents and how do you perceive your relationships with them after you are married?
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Tell your partner on a regular basis what you appreciate about them. This should include what you like about their personality, their mind, their behaviors, values, tastes and appearance. Have a regular date night, especially after you have children. Prepare a list for each other of things that your partner could do or already does that touch your heart. Exchange your lists and spontaneously give each other those things on a regular basis. Do not wait for your partner to give you one first and keep giving them even if your partner is not.
If you feel that things are not working out, seek help and do it early. The average couple waits six years to seek help after a problem arises and this is often too late. Half of all marriages that end in divorce do so in the first seven years and only 1 percent of couples seek help at all. In addition to the ideas mentioned above, couple’s counseling with a qualified relationship therapist before problems arise can help to enrich and enliven any relationship. Doing this every several months and/or attending some fun couple’s seminars or workshops periodically is a delightful way to insure an exciting marital journey. Also there are so many excellent books, CDs, workshops and seminars available to help couples resolve problems and have healthy relationships. Erica J. Burns, M.A., Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and Life Coach, is an Advanced Clinician in Imago Relationship Therapy, a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, a Licensed Addictions Therapist and an experienced career counselor. She offers the Imago Start Right Stay Connected Premarital Seminar to couples and groups, as well as the Imago Connects Workshop to people who are already married. She has offices in Jackson, Wyo., Driggs, Idaho and Scottsdale, Ariz. and works with couples and individuals in office, by telephone, or with Skype nationally. Website: ericajburns.com, email: ericajburns@silverstar.com phone: (208) 456-3086 or (307) 734-5352.
Got debt? Tips for keeping charges under control If you’re getting married, there’s a good chance you might. More than half of bridesto-be plan on using a credit card to help pay for their wedding, according to the Brides. com 2009 American Wedding Study. But racking up credit-card debt is not the way to start your marriage. Here are five tips from Billshrink.com, Redwood City, Calif., on how to save with your credit card: Avoid paying only the minimum when the bill comes. If you go this route, you’ll end up paying 2-3 times the amount (or more) for the purchases in question. Take advantage of zero-percent interest balance transfer offers to combat higher interest cards, but be savvy about it. Avoid offers with high transfer fees that have no max limit. Combating credit-card debt? Always pay the highest rate card first. Every dollar you put toward a high-rate debt will be a major help in the long run. Even if you’re the type to pay off a credit card every month, to create a good credit score, paying on time isn’t all you need to worry about. You have to keep old cards active to show your creditworthiness over time while making sure you don’t charge to your limit each month either. If you get those cards for 15 percent off at point of purchase and think not activating the card means it won’t count — you’re wrong. Failing to dial in for activation won’t keep it from showing up in your credit score. © CTW Features
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This common glass icon can help you decorate your wedding ceremony and reception venues without breaking your budget
Vases Probably the easiest way to incorporate these jars in your wedding. Aisle décor hang Mason jars filled with flowers on shepherd’s hooks along the aisle at your ceremony site. Then move them to the reception venue and uses them as centerpieces on the tables. Lanterns Line your reception tent with these glowing DIY lights. These also make nice centerpieces. Candle holders/ luminaries Place candles that match your color scheme in the jars for easy, no fuss décor. Glue material such as lace around the glass for a luminary effect. Favors Don’t forget about the classic use of these jars. Make batches of jam or put local honey in small jars for your guests to take home. Table number holders With flowers and candles or without, tie table numbers printed on sturdy cardstock or chalkboard paint make it easy for your guests to find their seats. Antiques Want that aqua-mason jar feeling without paying $5 a pop for the coveted jars on eBay? Visit bridalbuzz.blogspot.com for step-bystep instructions on how to turn you clear glass into aqua glass without spending big bucks. Where to find Mason jars: Ask you neighbors, hit up yard sales, peruse thrift stores. These are probably the easiest décor items to find!
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heap ‘n easy spa tricks You don’t need to drop a fortune for spa-quality results Anna Sachse / CTW Features Going to the spa is great, but in these times your wedding budget might be best served by employing some do-it-yourself spa techniques at home. Check out these secrets from the pros for saving a few bucks on your beauty regimen.
At-Home Body Scrub — Cornelia Zicu, chief creative officer of Red Door Spas
• Combine 1 cup oatmeal (which calms skin), 2 tablespoons milk powder, 1 teaspoon honey, 2 drops lavender essential oil and a half-cap of olive or avocado oil. • Add mixture to a simple, fragrance-free body wash and gently exfoliate the entire body. Rinse and revel in your silky skin! Do once a week.
Makeup Magic — Daniel Martin, New York-based Lancôme Celebrity Makeup Artist
• To ensure your makeup rides off into the sunset with you, use primer before foundation and always layer creams before powder, advises Martin. Another inside tip? If you want lighter coverage than a full foundation, try mixing moisturizer with concealer.
Look for Deals — Elizabeth Martinez, a stylist at Salon Pop, a Bumble and Bumble and Wella salon in Long Beach, Calif. • The economy also is having an effect on salons and spas. Check websites, local papers, Facebook/MySpace pages and your mailbox for special promotions on services. “A lot of beauty supply stores and salons are offering great deals on high-end products now as well,” Martinez says. Stop in or give them a call.
© CTW Features
Start Right, Stay Connected
Erica J Burns, MA
Licensed Professional Counselor Offers day long Imago Relationship Therapy Seminars to help Couples:
• Plan the wedding and stay sane • Learn tools to have a successful marriage
The Gift They Will Use Forever. Driggs: 208 456 3086 Jackson: 307 734 5352 www.eburns-phonecounselor.com
Broulim’s in Driggs carries a variety of products from local food manufacturers.
ocal flavor of love BHannah Seligson / CTW Features If an environmentally friendly wedding is what you’re looking for, plan a menu from local foods. “It’s become a huge trend,” says Cori Russell, editorial director for elegale.com, a national wedding planning resource. “Having a locally grown menu is becoming easy to pull off and more couples are doing it.” So if you are thinking about joining this burgeoning movement, Russell gives her tips for how to put “local” in “local menu.”
Find out what the options are with your caterer Russell, also editor of Gala Weddings magazine, advises couples to talk to their caterer about incorporating more locally grown food into the menu. “Most caterers are open to working with local suppliers,” she says. However, if you decide to go with a caterer who specifically specializes in locally grown produce, Russell suggests using the Internet as a resource. “Greenhotels.com has a list of member hotels that have expressed an eagerness to institute a green program, whether it’s an organic or locally grown cuisine,” she says.
region. “New England lends itself to seafood, but if you are getting married in the middle of the country, think about corn-influenced dishes,” Russell says.
Buy a suit rather than rent a tux. Matching ties for all the men. A variety of colored shirts to choose from.
Not sure how to do it? Ask the locals. Russell found a couple that will be featured on elegala. com in September that took their Bermuda wedding to the plate, too. “They consulted a local chef there,” she says. “Their menu had fresh Wahu, a local fish, and a Bermudian chocolate rum cake that played to local flavors.”
Let your guests in on why their food tastes so good While this comes down to personal preference, it’s a nice touch to let your guest know that their dinner is made from local ingredients. “You can make it subtle, by just noting that all the ingredients are local on the menu cards, or I’ve seen couples actually mention it to everyone,” Russell says.
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Anticipate a price increase Russell warns couples that locally grown can add a cost, but says that avoiding the word “organic” can keep the tab down. “Organic always means an automatic price hike,” she says, “so I would try to be flexible and stick to words like ‘local’ and ‘in season,’ especially if you are on a tight budget.”
Play to the local flavors Let your location inform the menu by using food either exclusive to or notable in your
MAKE FERRELL’S YOUR GROOM’S HEADQUARTERS
Bill Boney’s Dining Inn offers food from local vendors whenever possible.
160 W. 2nd S. (Hemming Village) • Rexburg • 359.2871
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Kisa Koenig
Kisa Koenig
Kisa Koenig
Kisa Koenig
Photos by Kisa Koenig and Jamye Chrisman Kisa Koenig
Kisa Koenig
Jamye Chrisman
Jamye Chrisman
Jamye Chrisman
Jamye Chrisman Jamye Chrisman
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Tips for including your four-legged friends in your wedding Lisa Nyren / TVN Staff
ironed out.
One of the best decisions my fiancé Lyle and I have made together so far is the decision go get our dog, Bella. (Actually, it was more my decision and his inability to say no to a cuddly puppy the color of honey, but who’s counting?)
In my research on having pets in weddings, I have come across a few tips that every couple-to-be with a four-legged companion should be aware of. Here are some from Petfinder.com:
It’s a great story, really. We had just purchased a townhome in Driggs in 2008, and while shopping at area yard sales for gently-used furniture and décor, I arrived at one sale whose organizers had advertised an entertainment center in the classifieds. The homeowner, who was moving her family to Kansas for work, showed me the center, which was, mildly, a disappointment. But there was also something else for sale that she hadn’t advertised yet— A pool full of Labrador/Golden Retriever mix puppies. A couple weeks later we had ourselves a 4-week-old ball of fur, some dog formula and various stuffed animals from See N Save. Now, almost three years later, Bella has grown to about 85 pounds and is a prominent part of our everyday routines. So naturally, in accordance with our not-so-traditional, outdoor, informal wedding theme, we decided Bella should be a part of it. We’re dog people. As a matter of fact, we’re cat people too, and if our Hemingway cat Oliver didn’t mind socializing with large groups of people so much, we’d find a role for him to play in the wedding, as well. Anyway, I ordered a burlap ring pillow that will fit on a dog collar from Etsy, and the rest is yet to be completely
Make sure your ceremony and reception venues allow dogs. You may have to pay an extra deposit at some places. Choose a non-bridal-party friend to be in charge of the dog for the ceremony. Consider your pet’s temperament when deciding whether to include it in your wedding. If you’ve got an aggressive, nip-happy dog, you may want to rethink bringing Fido to the party. Practice, practice, practice. While your dog may have completed Canine Good Citizen training with flying colors, don’t expect it to know what to do right off the bat. Consider that your crowd of wedding guests may distract your dog, or that the dog won’t quite get that it should walk down the aisle on command. In some cases, it’s best to have someone walk with the dog on a leash to ensure there are no detours on the way to the officiant.
Photo by Lisa Nyren
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o the ‘moon on a budget Author Suze Orman says a great honeymoon isn’t about how much you spend, it’s about how much fun you have Marlene Fedin / CTW Features Memorable. Unimaginable. Everlasting. Your honeymoon, right? Maybe. But if you max out your credit to pay for a honeymoon, you’re more likely to be describing your monthly credit-card bills than the hoped-for afterglow of your special trip. As couples super-size travel plans and live out fantasies, noted financial advisor Suze Orman cautions, many are starting married life mired in multi-digit debt that may outlive the marriage. If you want a joyous shared experience — instead of years of financial debris — to be your lasting honeymoon memory, check out these dollar-shaving tactics to minimize costs and maximize your travel experience.
Don’t Equate Money Spent With Satisfaction
an idea of how much more you’ll need” to spend on other items.
Do Your Homework How far will your dollars stretch? Check newspaper travel sections; read Frommer’s Budget Travel magazine (a timely and credible source for deals, discounts, and info on U.S. and foreign venues); review offerings from reputable onand offline tour operators and discount and last-minute travel specialists. Consider destinations such as Mexico and Canada where the dollar is strong; you’ll get more for your bucks. Locales with high tourist traffic and heavy competition usually offer good deals.
Be as Flexible as You Can
Don’t be lured into overspending. As Renee Duane, owner of Unforgettable Honeymoons, a Portland travel agency, wisely notes, “a honeymoon is about your experience together as a couple… Going to a luxury resort doesn’t mean you will have a memorable (trip).”
To get the best deals, rethink when you’ll leave, where you’ll go, where you’ll stay, and how you’ll get there. Choose a different location. Book a shorter stay. Depart from a major hub, book a discount air carrier or charter, fly midweek, late at night. Opt for a tour package. Postpone — or delay — the honeymoon until the less-expensive off- or shoulder season.
Spend Where It Matters
Ask for Help
Determine what’s non-negotiable (an exotic locale, posh lodgings, etc.) and what you’re willing to compromise on. Spend accordingly. With established priorities, it’ll be easier to make the inevitable trade-offs.
Fund your dream trip with donations of miles (for free airfare) and dollars (Sign up at an on- or offline honeymoon registry.)
Set a Budget
Exchange your frequent-travel plan miles and points for heavy-ticket airfare and luxury hotel and resort stays. Use what you save on airfare or lodgings to land better deals or upgrades.
Use budget calculators such as MoonRings.com’s interactive version and Honeymoon Specialist.com’s worksheet to nail down spending by category. Without detailing expenses, you’re likely to under-budget for your trip. Duane’s formula for concocting a budget? “Take what you’re spending on the hotel (per day) and double it to give you
Use What You’ve Got
Seek Expert Advice Save your time and your sanity — they’re both priceless. You could spend from now until your first anniversary
For a closer honeymoon location check out Destinations Inn in Idaho Falls. Their artisan-crafted theme suites are one of a kind, transporting guests to various “destinations” all over the world.
researching the “best” deals. Experienced agents can help you swiftly navigate the maze and minefield of budget-travel options to find your best match. They can also help you identify hidden costs, research vendors and provide firsthand knowledge of destinations.
Don’t Buy by the Numbers Price doesn’t tell the whole story, advises Duane, “You need to know about the property and the experience it provides.” If you don’t know who you’re buying from and where you’re going, your honeymoon could resemble a horror story rather than a fairytale. Most important, don’t pick a location only because it’s cheap. When comparing options, consider the overall value in terms of your needs.
Read the Fine Print Is a rate per person, per night, or per package? Never assume anything. Know what is — and isn’t — included in quoted costs, minimum and maximum stays, and other conditions and terms that affect the total price. Airport and room taxes and fees and other charges can up seemingly low-cost advertised package or per-night rates.
Copyright © CTW Features
on’ts for a stress-free honeymoon Want a happy getaway? Here’s what you should avoid Marlene R. Fedin / CTW Features You’re most likely to savor a stress-less honeymoon at a destination and hotel/ resort that best match your personal wish list. The key to a pleasurable trip is defining what works for you and not simply choosing a place because it’s well known or a top honeymoon destination. Here are some more things you shouldn’t do when planning your honeymoon.
Don’t: Skimp on travel planning “Couples are so busy getting ready for the wedding that they forget to do a lot of things,” observes Renee Duane, owner of Unforgettable Honeymoons, Portland, Ore. One of the most serious oversights: “Make sure you have the proper form of ID and have it in your hands at least two weeks before the wedding,” advises Duane.
Be seduced by pretty pictures No matter how appealing, “Don’t base your decision on the visual appearance
of a location,” Duane cautions. “Your expectations may not match the way the place really looks.”
Limit your search to one vacation Some couples have blind spots – a long-held dream location, properties whose rates exceed their budget, or an infatuation with a single destination or resort – that can keep them from securing the best deal and “fit” for their wish list. Explore more than one location or venue before you hand over a deposit. Travel agents can pinpoint less well known but equally intriguing spots that fit your budget; steer you away from resorts that don’t deliver on promises; vet your favorite venues; and alert you to mismatches between your dream spots and your travel needs.
Succumb to on-line travel scams To protect yourself from financial risk and disappointment avoid the “too cheap to be true” offers that litter the travel marketplace.
Rule out “all-inclusive” trips With upscale ambiance and offsite touring, in-room dining, and other high-end amenities (think spa treatments, yacht trips, and private island picnics), top-of-the-line venues can satisfy even the most sophisticated travelers.
Book under your married name This is a common mistake for many brides. If you don’t want to be turned away by security, book under your maiden name and bring that ID with you to the airport. Plan every moment of your trip. A super-active, over-scheduled vacation can easily stress out already exhausted honeymooners.
Hold out for last-minute bargains Unless you’ve both got nerves of steel or are willing to forgo a trip, it’s a bad idea to base your honeymoon on a fluctuating inventory of flights and rooms.
© CTW Features
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What is the secret to a happy marriage? “Like and respect your spouse in addition to loving them.” Phyllis Lamkin Victor Married 24 years
“Friendship. We were high school sweethearts.” Tom and Beth Troshysky Tetonia Married 33 years
“I think it is compromise and communication.” Brian Gibson Driggs Married 22 years
“Try to laugh a lot and love being with your spouse. Don’t fight in front of your kids and keep a united front when parenting. Also what really helps is being united in your spiritual beliefs. Don’t keep score and allow each other to have different ideas and interests.” John and Nancy Nielson Driggs Married 34 years
“Validate and support each others individual interests. Do lots of things apart.” Ginger Howard Alta Married 34 years.
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