How to Deal With Bullies
By Daniel Harper
http://ezhealthmanagement.com/blog/
Bullies make other people’s lives difficult and miserable. They cause fear, stress and anxiety and they take pleasure from doing so. On top of that, bullies come in different appearances, sizes and they are everywhere, especially in schools and even the work place. Constantly being bullied is bad for your health, both mentally, spiritually and physically. So if you feel that you are harassed by a bully, here are the things that you can do to stop it:
Draw the line. Some people think that dealing with bullies is just a matter of toughening it out. It might work in certain cases but not all the time. A bully will not go away and will keep on prodding you until you make it clear where the limits are. And once those limits are reached, tell the bully how his actions are negatively affecting your productivity and that you will not tolerate it more in the future. Set some rules like “Do not come to my cubicle unless I invited you. Please respect my private work space.” or “Do not touch my things without asking permission.” and stick to it. If he violates you again, then confront the bully right away.
Confront the bully. Now this might be the hardest part since confronting the bully will require a lot of guts and courage but needs to be done. Bullies will continue on bullying unless a person points out to him his negative actions. The moment he starts yelling, insulting, or calling you names, point it out immediately in an assertive but firm way. Be careful not to sound like you’re making a threat as it will only aggravate the situation. Consider a bully as a toddler throwing tantrums and you just need to deliver some tough love. Do not give in to the bully’s fits otherwise it will just lead to more fits.
Document his actions. Whenever you experience any sort of bullying from a person, make sure that you document the incident together with the time and date as well as the details. Also note if there are witness during the incident. If bullying is done online, make sure that you make screenshot or a print out of the email or chat conversations. This will help you make a report to the HR department (or the Guidance Counselor if you’re in school) when the need arises. Remember that you’re in the work place and if your productivity is affected by bullying then it is affecting the company’s business.
You’re not alone. If you are being bullied chances are you’re not alone. Talk to co-workers or fellow students that are being bullied as well and encourage them to document the bullying incidents so that all of you can file a report. The more of you who can gather evidence the stronger the case will be. You have to understand that some people are afraid of coming up with this on their own so encourage them to do the right thing. This will take a lot of courage on your part so be strong.
Report it. Nobody wants this to happen but if you want to restore the balance and harmony at your work place or school then this has to be done. Gather the reports then ask help from your managers, HR (or teachers if you’re in school) so you can file a formal complaint. An investigation will be made and hopefully things will be dealt with in a very effective manner.
The office and school is an extension of yourself and the people you closely work with can be considered a part of your life already. When someone tries to ruin it through bullying, it is your responsibility to take action. Otherwise you’ll just spend your days hating your office or school, and yourself for being miserable and angry. Hopefully this guide can help you deal with your bully so you can have a more peaceful environment for a healthier you.
“Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke.” ~Benjamin Disraeli
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