Nurse Ratchet Is Jealous Of My Song

274 to have my blood levels checked and to take my medication. This I did as regular as clockwork and kept in touch with Dr Walmsely, even when I was signed off as needing care. This was because I was aware of my reality and fear of depression.

Nurse Ratchet Is Jealous Of My Song

After this meeting I felt the desire to compose a song in praise to God, for the help I had received, and I wrote the following entitled, “Spirit of the Lord Come down” and was able to sing it at the Warsash church. This desire was an expression thanks for the support I had received from God during my recent awful times. However when Nurse Ratchet heard my song she expressed she was jealous, as it was not about her. I found this response incredible and it portrayed to me she had deep-seated insecurities. Realising this was the case and wishing to assure her she had no need to be jealous, I re-wrote the words for her benefit. This new song was called, “Can your remember”. Unfortunately I was never able to sing this version of the song as we separated in November 1998, but that did not stop my plan to sing this love song to her the next year. Not only did I re write the song but also I practised it many times and sung at various venues after we separated. Finally I decided it should be recorded and be release as a single.

Joining the Warsash Church

At this time sometime in October 1998, a few weeks before our second and final separation, we had attending the Warsash Church for some time and Nurse Ratchet, without notice, began to attend the church in Titchfield, on her own, without informing me of the reason, so continued to attend the Warsash church. It was then that I was asked, by one of the elders, to become a church member. This however was one of the last things on my mind, so I said I would consider it.

40 Our Second And Final Separation

The resentment, between Nurse Ratchet and my children, led to our second and final separation. This took place on the 4th November 1998 when I left and retreated to 11 Hayling Close, dreading the future, as I felt so low in my mood.

Nurse Ratchet had repeatedly stated she wanted me to leave and if I wouldn’t go she would get her ex husband to come and remove my things. I finally realized I would have to go and so I made all the necessary preparations, regarding finance and securing my personal things. I left the morning of that day, as I knew once I had gone I would have no cooperation from Nurse Ratchet to resolve anything.

On a previous occasion I had given Nurse Ratchet £4,000, this soon after

275 my fathers death but she said she did not want it but would look after it for me until I needed it. So I opened an ISA account in her name and deposited the money. It was during the weeks before I left on the 4th November, that I realised I would have difficulties getting the money from her, never the less I had asked her for the money. She refused and would not give it to me. And still continually told me to leave. So I wrote to the ISA bank, in her name, informing them of our change of address i.e. To 11 Hayling Close and the following week I wrote to the company to close the account asking for the £4000 signing the letter in her name. I was thankful it was successful and I receive the cheque for £4000 plus interest. Never the less it was this action of mine that sent her around the bend with anger and was the reason for her saying I was a hypocrite.

It was with great sadness that I learned, to my dismay, that Nurse Ratchet had purposely been very difficult and awkward with me, those weeks before hand, in order to drive me out and away from our home. I learned this after reading her secret diary written in October 98. The entry reads,

“The more horrible you are to someone the more Dave is drawn to them- he always sides with the ones being got at. So I’ll be even more horrible and he may go to his darlings. His loyalty to me is disgusting.”

I realise this now that this accounted for her unacceptable behaviour towards my children and my subsequent desire to protect them from it was but a natural instinct and a Christian principle that I followed.

She continued to write, “I’m sick of hearing their names. I wish he’d just live with them at wonderful number 11”.

On Thursday 15th October, 1998 she wrote, “I’m am full of rage and feel sick and in knots. I hate all of them” --They have evil in them--they needed to be away from others.

Nurse Ratchet, the psychiatric nurse, had made up her mind about my children as can be seen by what she wrote and referred to them as the “KLU CLARKE CLAN.”

The Clu Clarke Clan

I knew there was a problem and had previously suggested we get help from the Family Mediation Service, because I knew things between us all we so caustic. Unfortunately Nurse Ratchet felt differently. She was offended that I should suggest such a thing to her as she was a trained Adult mental health nurse and so did not need any help in mediation. On the 26/10/98, her diary entry wrote, “I want to kill him.”

It was the following week that Nurse Ratchet stated to me that Eleanor and Esther were no longer Rebekah’s sisters but another girl Gillian was, who baby-sat for her. At the same said she wanted Rebekah to have another father.

I discovered these things written in Nurse Ratchet’s secret diary when I returned to our home, the week after I left, whilst she was at work.

I left and took all my things on the 4th November 1998.

Nurse Ratchet’s problem with me joining the church at Warsash

During the weeks leading to my escape the thought of joining the church at Warsash was one of the last things on my mind. Things at home were so difficult I could scarcely think of any other thing wishing to solve the problems in the marriage. However I wanted to be more involved in the church and I felt so rejected by Nurse Ratchet, it felt as though God was saying. “ If your wife rejects you, I will receive you”. With this feeling and reason I agreed to join the church and felt wanted.

Nurse Ratchet was later informed, by one of the elders, after we had separated in November, saying that I was about to become a member of the church. I learned she felt angry about it. She did not like it and was very upset for some unknown reason. She did not feel I should be allowed to join the church on the grounds of all the allegations she had written about