BGSD_BathW by David Lewins

“Bath has a charm that is reﬂected in the people who live there and the clothes they wear. There is nowhere else that offers the unique experience of a day’s shopping in Bath.”

FEB.25.2017

Perfect Vintage THE

Presenter and author Dawn O’Porter on how Bath has some of the best vintage shops in the UK, and why she’s made sure her new fashion line will leave you room for pudding

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

24:03:17

CONTENTS &CONTACTS

ON THE COVER

Martha Wainwright’s back in town - and she means business

We’ve been out to Bath’s newest eaterie, Burger and Lobster, to try the new menu

AG E

WRITER NANCY CONNOLLY 01225 322224 PAGE DESIGN TARA PARDO PIP O’SHEA

JAMES ALLOWAY james.alloway@ localworld.co.uk 01179 343315

CONTRIBUTORS ZITA ALVES JAMIE MARSDEN

Books and more books and then a bit of light reading for the week

Three of the UK’s best interior designers share tips from home

BEN CORLETT ben.corlett@ localworld.co.uk 078235 22388

The eyes have it - our pick of the best liquid eyeliners on the high street

Florals for spring and Manolo Blahnik

TO ADVERTISE: ZEMONE LATTO zemone.latto@ localworld.co.uk 0117 9343426

The gigs, the shows, the comedy nights, the ﬁlms and all you need this week

A word from Sam: our editor’s been out to the Bath Boules day Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

FO O

:P IC MUS

Your essential guide to making the most of Bath this week

EDITOR SAMANTHA WALKER samantha.walker@ localworld.co.uk 01225 322224

PHOTOGRAPHY: ARTUR LESNIAK PAUL GILLIS

13 E AG :P

WHAT’S ON

1. EAT

THIS WEEK YOU REALLY OUGHT TO...

NEW MENU: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. It starts at 12pm, to book call 01225 331922.

2. DRINK

COCKTAIL O’CLOCK: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. It starts at 12pm, to book call 01225 331922.

3. TRY

POTTERY: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. It starts at 12pm, to book call 01225 331922.

4. LEARN

QUIDDITCH: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. It starts at 12pm, to book call 01225 331922.

5. SEE

6. LISTEN

TAKE THE KIDS Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

1 ● People over 60 can help to raise a small flock of chickens at Bath City Farm on Mondays from 1-3pm. These sessions are for people who want to improve their health and wellbeing. More information at bathcityfarm.org.uk ● People over 60 can help to raise a small flock of chickens at Bath City Farm on Mondays from 1-3pm. These sessions are for people who want to improve their health and wellbeing. More information at bathcityfarm.org. uk ● People over 60 can help to raise a small flock of chickens at Bath City Farm on Mondays from 1-3pm. These sessions are for people who want to improve their health and

GUIDE THE

IDEAS FOR HOW TO MAKE THE MOST OF THIS WEEK IN BATH

BATH HALF MARATHON

OUR CHOICES WINE TASTING Join writer Simon Woods for a wine tasting this evening (March 9) from 6.30-8pm. Tickets cost £20 and include a copy of Simon’s book ‘I don’t know much about wine but I know what I like’. £5 from every ticket goes to the Bath Rugby Foundation. DANCE OFF Enjoy dance with the production Lina at the Mission Theatre in Corn Street on March 9 and 10 at 7.30pm. The work looks at the lives and obsessions of William and Caroline Herschel. Tickets £8/£6, 01225 428600.

Turn out and cheer on runners in this year’s Vitality Bath Half Marathon on Sunday, March 12. The event starts at 11am from Great Pulteney Street but as the route covers more than 13.1 miles there are plenty of places

Take a look at Anne Desmet’s solo exhibition Under Changing Skies at the Holburne. The wood engraver will be showing prints and mixed media collages from March 11 until June 4. Visit holburne. org for more information.

Love your Britpop classics and indie hits? The Nest is launching new club night Brightside every Tuesday night playing some classic and new indie tunes.

THE BEST OF BATH’S CALENDAR FOR THE WEEK AHEAD... MUSICAL EVENING The Chapel Arts Café is hosting an evening of kora music thanks to Gambian musician Jally Kebba Susso on Friday, March 10 at 8pm. Tickets cost £10 in advance or £12 on the door, PETS FIRST AID Love your pets? Find out how to do ﬁrst aid for them at Bath Cats and Dogs Home on Thursday, March 16 from 7pm. Tickets cost £20, Book at 01225 787334. IMPROVE YOUR HOME Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. MUSICAL EVENING Turn out and cheer on runners in this year’s Vitality Bath Half Marathon on Sunday, March 12. The event starts at 11am from Great Pulteney Street but as the route covers more than 13.1 miles there are plenty of places to cheer from. SOMETHING A BIT DIFFERENT Join writer Simon Woods for a wine tasting this evening (March 9) from 6.30-8pm. Tickets cost £20 and include a copy of Simon’s book.

spring at colston hall 0117 203 4040 colstonhall.org

wed 1 mar mike and the mechanics

fri 17 mar dakhla // remi harris trio

tue 21 mar alexis taylor

thu 2 mar ycat lunchtime concert: savitri grier and richard uttley

fri 17 mar alec dankworth spanish accents

wed 22 mar martin harley & daniel kimbro

fri 3 mar lack of afro

fri 17 mar bristol bluesmen

sat 4 mar henning wehn

fri 17 mar the big swing

sat 4 mar amp fiddler

sat 18 mar robben ford

sun 5 mar the grahams

sat 18 mar kirk fletcher // mud morganfield

mon 6 mar brit floyd

sat 18 mar moscow drug club

mon 6 mar oddisee & good compny

sat 18 mar sound for spies and private eyes

tue 7 mar albert lee tue 7 mar sue perkins tue 7 mar ram lunchtime concert: cameron johnson wed 8 mar the bill laurance group thu 9 mar hamilton leithauser thu 9 mar laura marling fri 10 mar bournemouth symphony orchestra: heroes and legends

thu 23 mar sean lock: keep it light thu 23 mar daniel lanois: solo instrumental av set

sun 9 apr caro emerald mon 10 apr rick astley

sun 26 mar uwe singers and symphony orchestra

wed 12 apr monteverdi 450: il ritorno d’ulisse in patria

sat 18 mar dinosaur

tue 28 mar sklamberg & the shepherds

sat 18 mar ricky riccardi: how louis armstrong revolutionised popular music

tue 28 mar amy macdonald

thu 13 apr ycat lunchtime concert: nika goric and jonathan ware

sat 18 mar jason rebello sun 19 mar jimi hendrix (slight return) sun 19 mar ‘praise!’ featuring the london community gospel choir

sun 19 mar robin nolan trio

sun 12 mar an evening with hazel o’connor

sun 19 mar pee wee ellis & roger biwandu trio sun 19 mar macy gray

tue 28 mar ram lunchtime concert: oscar caravaca wed 29 mar king ayisoba thu 30 mar kate simko & london electronic orchestra thu 30 mar sound industry conference fri 31 mar ycat lunchtime concert: alexander ullman fri 31 mar grandaddy fri 31 mar ibibio sound machine sat 1 apr paul weller

sun 19 mar yazz ahmed

wed 15 mar flats & sharps

sun 19 mar jasper høiby’s fellow creatures

thu 16 – sun 19 mar bristol jazz and blues festival

mon 20 mar scott bradlee’s postmodern jukebox

thu 16 mar sari schorr & the engine room // northsyde

sat 8 apr national children’s orchestras of great britain

sat 18 mar gilad atzmon & alan barnes

sun 12 mar devin townsend project

thu 16 mar metropolis with andy sheppard

fri 7 apr winter mountain + brooke sharkey

tue 11 apr the john mccusker band

sun 19 mar the bobby shew big band – my friend dizzy

tue 14 mar ram lunchtime concert: ariel lanyi

sat 25 mar bristol choral society & bristol ensemble: mendelssohn and mozart

fri 7 apr jimmy carr

sat 25 mar devon sproule

sat 11 mar rodigan: my life in reggae

tue 14 mar jonwayne

fri 24 mar horse & bamboo theatre: theatre ballads

thu 6 apr bournemouth symphony orchestra: rococo and revolution

tue 21 mar ram lunchtime concert: noemi gyori and katalin csillagh

sat 1 apr manu delago tue 4 apr 10cc tue 4 apr john smith wed 5 apr ne-yo wed 5 apr nathan fake

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

thu 13 apr marcel lucont’s whine list fri 14 apr under the skin: mica levi + london sinfonietta sat 15 apr holy holy: the rise and fall of ziggy stardust and the spiders from mars sun 16 apr gipsy kings wed 19 apr bc camplight thu 20 apr the led zeppelin masters fri 21 apr laetitia sadier sun 23 apr al stewart sun 23 apr jambinai tue 25 apr koyaanisqatsi: gogo penguin wed 26 apr billy ocean wed 26 apr david starkey: henry viii thu 27 apr bournemouth symphony orchestra: love letters

STROUD AUCTION ROOMS

Entries now invited for our upcoming March auction to include jewellery & watches Gentleman's Pocket Watches Ladies Wristwatches Wristwatches

A Rolex Yachtmaster wristwatch Sold for £8000

Diamonds

An Art Deco diamond solitaire brooch. Sold for £9,000

A ladies Rolex. Sold for £1,100

An 18ct gold gentleman's pocket watch and 18ct gold Albert. Sold for £1200 £120

Amber

A Baltic amber necklace Sold for £9000

Antique

A Georgian/ early Victorian necklace £1400

Contact Stuart Maule & Alexandra Bowkett DGA, GA Deadline for entries 20th February

FREE valuations every Friday & Saturday at our saleroom, at your home by appointment or why not email us a photograph for an instant valuation? info@stroudauctions.com

NO HIDDEN CHARGES OR FEES FOR UNSOLDS - LIVE ONLINE BIDDING ON ALL LOTS IN THE CATALOGUE - WHY ACCEPT LESS? We are regularly ranked no 1 in the country for the number of online bidders Unit J, Bath Road Trading Estate, Stroud, GL5 3QF

01453 766788 www.stroudauctions.co.uk Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

INTERVIEW

Martha

W A I N W R I MARTHA WAINWRIGHT ASKED FRIENDS TO WRITE SONGS FOR HER LATEST ALBUM, RESULTING IN A LESS AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL COLLECTION. ANDY WELCH FINDS OUT WHY IT’S NO BAD THING.

ike most people in the post-Christmas fog, Martha Wainwright wants to get back to work, but is struggling to get motivated. It might be something to do with her surroundings – she’s sitting looking out of a window onto the frozen landscapes of Montreal’s outskirts, where she lives. “We had a nice Christmas, very

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

nice, a big family affair.” A big family affair is how Wainwright’s career could be described. She’s the daughter of late singer songwriter Kate McGarrigle and Loudon Wainwright III, with whom she’s had something of a rocky relationship. Her 2005 debut EP, for example, has an expletive-riddled title (Bloody Mother F***ing Asshole, if you were wondering), aimed square-

of my own.” Another reason, she admits somewhat jokingly, is that by getting other artists to write for her, she might win a bigger audience. “I wanted to take songwriters that are more successful than me and take their songs, and then I’d get all the credit. Of course, they get the songwriting credit, but I get to perform them, and sing songs that are more accessible. “Glen Hansard, for example, he’s written more accessible songs that have crossed over. And I guess my voice is probably what I am most known for.” She’s correct in that Hansard has written successful songs. The Irish songwriter won an Oscar for his work on the Once soundtrack. Other contributors to the album include Beth Orton, Merrill Garbus, better known as Tune-Yards, and award-winning poet and author Michael Ondaatje, whose prose forms the lyrics of Piano Music. All in all, it makes for a pretty stunning album. Musically, it veers from one style to another, from almost experimental electronica to a swooning ballad like Francis, written by her brother, but never sounds jarring or less than a coherent whole. Lyrically, it’s less confessional, less naval-gazing than much of Wainwright’s other work. “Writing autobiographically was something I was always willing to do, and of course I come from a tradition of that,” says the 40-year-old. Both she and her brother were the subject of songs written by their father, while Rufus has addressed many personal matters in his songs. “My mum, although she wrote personal songs, they were much more subtle and I envy her for that,” she says. “My dad, he writes and puts it all out on the line, and uses his songs to explain his behaviour or what he thinks about things, and I think they end up touching people because the audience feel the same way. The audience appreciates it, although some ﬁnd it cringey. “Personal songs have certainly got me into trouble over the years, with loved ones and so on. People are always worried about ending up in a song. I’m trying to be creative now though, and write in other ways. There’s never been much persona in my songs.” She says, despite trying not to, she

does write lyrics about her children, although it comes from a place of protection. And she’s nice about her kids, whereas previously, the people who’ve made it into Wainwright’s songs have been targets, those who have wronged her or broken her heart. “I guess it’s because my kids are the new love, that’s replaced a fanatical love, the desperate love I had in my youth. It’s deﬁnitely still fanatical, desperate love, but so much more satisfying in many ways, and softer. Francis sounds like a love song to a teenage girl, but it’s actually about a baby.” Although Wainwight says she was built for entertainment, and dropped out of university to pursue her career, she’s slightly disillusioned with the way things have gone. “Don’t ask me how many records I’ve sold,” she says. “I think if I thought about it, I’d crawl back into bed and stay there.” It’s true her success and renown don’t quite match her unique talent. There are certainly lesser songwriters making much better livings. “I don’t think sales are the most accurate way to judge someone’s career any more, but I’m not sure what it’s been replaced by.” Longer term, she has a brilliant idea for a TV show that she’s recorded a couple of pilot episodes for already. It involves her cooking in her apartment with another musician. They chat, then when they’re done, or waiting for their food to cook, they perform a few songs. She sees it as a relaxed format, and something she thinks people would love to watch. “It’d be a real insight into the guests’ personality. I hope that gets picked up for television. Until then, I just have to keep trying.”

PERSONAL SONGS HAVE CERTAINLY GOT ME INTO TROUBLE OVER THE YEARS, WITH LOVED ONES AND SO ON. PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS WORRIED ABOUT ENDING UP IN A SONG.

I G H T ly at her old man’s knack for writing songs about his family, rather than talking to them. Her brother is fellow artist Rufus, and there’s half-sister Lucy Wainwright Roche, and aunt Anna McGarrigle, too, another renowned songwriter. Martha’s career has seen her collaborate with her family and extended members, although she cast the net a

little wider on recent album, Goodnight City. That was for a number of reasons, mainly that, as the mother of two small children she says it would take her too long to write a whole album of suitable quality. “It took me half as long as normal as I only wrote half the songs,” she says. “I was going to do a complete record of other people’s songs, but as it went on, I ended up writing a bunch

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

MARTHA WAINWRIGHT IS AT ST GEORGES BRISTOL ON WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 25. SEE LISTINGS ON PAGE 28 FOR DETAILS. HER ALBUM GOODNIGHT CITY IS OUT NOW.

RECIPE

IF YOU THINK VEGAN COOKING ISN’T FOR YOU, SAM MURPHY’S GORGEOUS DEBUT COOKBOOK MIGHT MAKE YOU RECONSIDER. THE BLOGGER-TURNED-AUTHOR TALKS TO KEELEY BOLGER ABOUT HER JOURNEY FROM EATING DISORDER TO FOODIE

n a tug-of-war relationship with food and ﬁtness for many years, blogger Sam Murphy is the ﬁrst to admit her initial foray into veganism wasn’t a healthy one. The 24-year-old, who hails from New Zealand, had anorexia as a teenager, and initially, switching to veganism proved another means of controlling her eating and introducing new restrictions. “I was raw vegan for a while, and I was so obsessed with eating only raw foods in their natural state,” explains Murphy. “I can see how easy it is to slip into that, because essentially it’s addictive, you become obsessed with it. It’s a control thing. “If you’ve got something in your life that you feel a bit out of control with, a lot of us will turn to food and control that. I know I do.” After moving to Melbourne, where she still lives and works in a vegan cafe, Murphy slowly began to change her habits and rebuild a healthier relationship with nourishing her body, reintroducing the full gamut of vegan-friendly foods (and actually cooking them), opening up about her experiences in her blog (sobeautifullyreal.com) and, eventually, shaking off her staunchly-held views of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ foods. “Having spent so many years

having a very strict food rule list, I still catch myself out having those pre-conceived ideas about what is good and bad,” she admits. “It really restricts you creatively, but it also restricts your enjoyment for food. The challenge for me and for others is to break down barriers and just enjoy food as food, and obviously the important thing is keeping it within the realm of being dairy-free and cruelty-free. “I don’t see any reason why you should have to label something good or bad; it should just be real food.” Although she still has bad days, reﬂecting on her recovery, Murphy says: “I got to a point where my survival instincts kicked in. Something clicks, and you realise you deﬁnitely don’t want to live your life that way, and it’s that drive to keep striving for more but also to be really patient and really forgiving and loving towards yourself, and to know that you’re going to have ups and downs. “As soon as I removed the expectation that recovery was going to be this consistent uphill on a progressive scale, it relaxed me a little bit more,” she adds. “I’m able to deal with those moments that aren’t so great, which I still have - I’m human.” Her debut cookbook, Beautifully Real Food - a gorgeous, colourful

collection of mouthwatering vegan dishes - is clearly the work of somebody who now celebrates the joy of food. She’s keen not to preach about veganism though, especially since, as a former meat-eater, she recalls finding the concept very alien. “When I first heard of vegans, I thought it was the weirdest thing in the world. I was like, ‘What the hell do those people eat? It’s like eating grass!’” she says with a laugh. “It’s different. People are very set in their ways and I was too, and I suppose it’s more about educating, just trying it out. I don’t expect everyone in the world to go vegan, but if they could just try a meal that is vegan, possibly not knowing that it is vegan first, that would be ideal, so they go in with a very open mind. “The more people we can get on board, the better,” says Murphy. “I try not to push my views on people; I just welcome them in like ‘Hey, I’ll cook you some food and see if you like it!’”

KEEP IT REAL & Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

TURMERIC BAKED BEANS, POTATO HASH & SAUTEED GREENS (Serves 2) For the potato hash: 3 medium-large potatoes, peeled and chopped 1tbsp vegan butter

Give it a try: LOADED VEGAN HOT DOGS

For the sweet chilli sauce: 1-2tsp hot sauce or chilli paste 2tbsp reduced-salt tomato puree 2-3tbsp maple syrup 1tsp garlic powder 1tsp onion powder 1/2tsp salt Water to thin, if necessary For the cheesy mustard mayo: 1tsp Dijon mustard 1tbsp tahini 1tbsp maple syrup 2tsp nutritional yeast 1tsp onion powder 3-4tbsp hot water (to reach your desired consistency) 1/8tsp salt For the hot dogs: 2-3 vegan sausages 1/2 red onion, sliced

1-2tbsp oil, for frying 2-3 hot dog buns Salt and pepper, to taste Sesame seeds Method Prepare the sauces by mixing each separately in a bowl and storing in resealable plastic bags. Set aside. In a large frying pan, fry the vegan sausages and red onion in a little oil until the sausages are browned and crispy on all sides and the onions are crispy. Drain on a paper towel. Warm the buns in the oven or microwave. To assemble the hot dogs, cut a slice down the centre of the hot dog bun with a bread knife (ensure you do not cut all the way through).

To apply the sauces, simply slice a small corner oﬀ the resealable plastic bags with scissors and squeeze as you would with a piping bag. Spread a thin layer of sweet chilli sauce inside the bun and then insert the vegan sausage. Sprinkle with sesame seeds. Top with onion, salt and pepper and ﬁnish with a drizzle of both the sweet chilli sauce and cheesy mustard mayo.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

Beautifully Real Food: GuiltFree, Meat-Free Recipes To Indulge In by Sam Murphy out now priced £16.99

For the baked beans: 2tsp coconut oil 1 red onion, ﬁnely diced 1 garlic clove, minced 1 × 400g can haricot beans, rinsed and drained 1tsp ground turmeric 1tsp ground cumin 1/4tsp ground nutmeg 1tbsp coconut sugar (available from Tesco or Ocado) 1-2tsp vegetable bouillon or paste 125ml tomato puree 1/2 a 400g can chopped tomatoes 1tbsp coconut cream Salt and pepper, to taste Sauteed greens and mushrooms, to serve Method: Prepare the hash by chopping the potatoes and boiling until tender. Remove from heat and rinse in water. In a non-stick frying pan, simply fry the potatoes with the vegan butter over a medium heat until the potatoes are slightly crispy and broken up. For the baked beans, heat up the coconut oil in a nonstick frying pan and saute the onion and garlic until fragrant and browned. Add the beans, spices, coconut sugar, vegetable bouillon, tomato puree and canned tomatoes. Simmer for ﬁve to six minutes over a medium heat. Add the coconut cream and stir in. Remove from the heat and serve. Season to taste and serve with sauteed greens and mushrooms.

FIVE O’CLOCK SOMEWHERE

RECIPE

Here’s a selection of wines ideal for celebrating pie week

CHICKEN AND MUSHROOM PIE

STEAK AND KIDNEY PIE

BEEF, MUSHROOM AND RED WINE PIE

SLOW-COOKED LAMB PIE

For white meat in a creamy sauce, try a lightly oaked chardonnay such as Parker Williams Vineyard Chardonnay 2016, Coonawarra, Australia (£12.99, www. virginwines.co.uk). This sleek white from one of the region’s top estates has classic aromas and flavours of citrus, ripe pear and peach with a flick of vanilla and a lengthy finish - balanced, bright and full of verve.

A versatile red from northern Italy, Truly Irresistible Barbera D’Asti 2012, Italy (£6.99, The Co-operative) deftly mixes rich black cherry notes with ripe plums and spice that contrasts well against an earthy, savoury forest ﬂoor. An unbeatable price and match with the meaty gravy of the sauce.

A real crowd pleaser, once you’ve tasted Mount Rozier The Beekeeper Merlot 2015, South Africa (£7.99, The Co-operative), there might be just enough left over to make the sauce. A rich, smooth, fruity red that pulls all the right taste-strings, plummy dark fruits are laced with smoke and spice.

To discover the Jumilla wine route in south east Spain, try El Mayoral Monastrell Petit Verdot, Jumilla, Spain (£6.99, Aldi). A blend of monastrell and petit verdot grapes, it oﬀers sun- drenched cherry fruits with hints of blackberries steeped in liquorice and spice. Whether you’re a novice wine drinker or connoisseur, there’s enough depth to be interesting.

& for dessert COOKIES & CREAM SMOOTHIE (Makes 1 smoothie) For the ‘cookie’ pieces: 65g almonds 2tbsp cacao powder (available from health food shops and Amazon) 20g desiccated coconut 115g Medjool dates, pitted For the creamy smoothie: 2 frozen bananas, broken into chunks 125ml coconut cream 250ml almond milk 2tsp vanilla bean powder (available from Amazon and

2tbsp maple syrup or rice malt syrup Method Firstly, you want to prepare your cookie pieces by pulsing the almonds, cacao powder and coconut in a high-speed blender or food processor until a ﬁne meal forms. Add the dates last and pulse until it begins to stick together. Set aside in a bowl. To make the smoothie, simply blend the bananas, coconut cream, almond milk, vanilla and

maple syrup in a high-speed blender until creamy. Adjust the liquid as needed. Break the cookie pieces into small chunks and add to the blender again. Pulse the smoothie a few times to break the pieces up a little more. Pour into your favourite glass jar and serve at once. Beautifully Real Food: Guilt-Free, Meat-Free Recipes To Indulge In by Sam Murphy is published by Blink Publishing on February 23, priced £16.99

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

FOOD REVIEW

Stylish dishes in a very elegant setting HATTUSA AT BERWICK LODGE BERWICK DRIVE, BRISTOL, BS10 7TD. TEL: 0117 9581590. .BERWICKLODGE.CO.UK.

ccessed via a long and peaceful driveway that bisects a small copse, there’s something decidedly Harry Potter about Berwick Lodge as you first glimpse the imposing Victorian Arts & Crafts manor house through the trees. With its red-brick Gothic facade and stunning gardens, it would make a decent stand-in for the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, although rather than the likes of Horace Slughorn and Pomona Sprout walking through the wood-panelled corridors, the hotel is run by the far more charming Sarah and Fevzi Arikan. The Arikans opened Berwick Lodge eight years ago and they have worked tirelessly to put it on the map, as a boutique hotel but also as a dining destination. Chef Paul O’Neill arrived at Berwick Lodge at the end of 2014. The winner of the prestigious Roux Scholarship competition, he previously worked at London’s iconic Claridge’s hotel. With its stone pillars, impressive fireplaces, polished wooden floors and twinkling glass chandeliers, the ground floor restaurant has an immediate “wow” factor and our window table provided us with a tranquil view across the lawns dotted with snowdrops and crocuses – a sure sign that spring is on the way. As well as the seasonal a la carte menu, there is also a more affordable brasse-

rie-style menu at lunchtime and we mixed and matched from both. From the a la carte, tea-smoked duck, pickled orange gel, burnt orange, duck heart and watercress salad (£11.50) was a well balanced starter and a cheeky modern play on the classic French dish duck a l’orange. The strips of tender, lightly smoked duck breast and more steak-like heart working beautifully with the orange elements and the peppery watercress. Also from the a la carte, a piece of warm and juicy, citrus-cured sea trout (£10) – which had apparently been cooked “sous vide” in a water bath at 52°C – was teamed with an elegant, crunchy salad of apple and walnuts, with a pouring jug of chilled cucumber consommé. From the brasserie menu, a rump steak (£22.50) from the adjacent Berwick farm required a bit of elbow grease and a sharp knife despite being cooked medium-rare, but it had a deep ﬂavour and the accompaniments – chunky chips, onion rings, roasted ﬁeld mushroom, grilled tomato and béarnaise sauce – were all spot on.

Other options on this cheaper menu include sharing platters from £9.95; ham, egg and chips (£12.95) and Thai chicken salad (£10.50). Jumping back to the a la carte, a beautifully cooked piece ﬁllet of stone bass (£22) with brown shrimp butter, braised gem and potato salad and sweet and sour tomato was a light, delicate main course and a good excuse to end with a decadently rich salted caramel and chocolate mille-feuille (£9.50) with gossamer-thin layers of crisp pastry, hazelnut praline and intense Valrhona sorbet. A boozy rum poached pineapple (£9) arrived with a perfect tonka bean crème brûlée, zesty pineapple and lime sorbet and crunchy coconut ﬂakes.

FOOD ★★★★✩ SERVICE ★★★★✩ AMBIENCE ★★★★✩ VALUE ★★★★✩ OVERALL ★★★★✩

MARK TAYLORS’S VERDICT With its impressive Victorian building and stunning grounds, Berwick Lodge may have a bit of the Hogwarts about it, but it’s head chef Paul O’Neill who is conjuring up the culinary magic in the hotel’s elegant restaurant, whether you order from brasserie menu or go the whole hog with the a la carte.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

FASHION GET THE

LOOK

SPRING FLI NG

Fearne Cotton ticked off spring's biggest colour trend at the Garnier Ultimate Blends launch party last week. Teaming her bubblegum pink ASOS knit with wet-look trousers and silver heels, the presenter showed us how to turn a wintry woollen into a really party piece.

SOMETIMES, THE SPRING COLLECTIONS OFFER US A FASHION OVERHAUL; A TECTONIC SHIFT IN SARTORIAL LANDSCAPE. SS17 IS, AS IT HAPPENS, NOT ONE OF THOSE SEASONS - BUT THAT'S ACTUALLY A VERY GOOD THING. WHY? BECAUSE WE'RE SEEING A BEAUTIFUL, SLOW EVOLUTION OF TRENDS, AND WE'VE TIME TO ASSIMILATE THEM INTO OUR WARDROBE BEFORE THE NEXT MAJOR UPHEAVAL. WHISPER IT: SPRING IS ALL ABOUT SUBTLE TWISTS, NOT SWEEPING STATEMENTS. HERE'S HOW TO WELCOME IN FASHION'S GENTLE NEW WAVE...

IN THE PINK

From Chloe's powder pink babydoll frocks to Balmain's floor-sweeping raspberry suede overcoat and everything inbetween, the rosy hue was inescapable on the catwalks, offering a multitude of ways to style it. Even those who've previously sworn off the shade, thinking it too 'girly girl', will find it hard to resist the grungy allure of fuchsia lace, or blush pink velvet paired with black leather. ❖ Miss Selfridge Premium Angel Sleeve Midi Dress, £65; Drama Black Studded Biker Boots, £49; Black Mesh Socks, £3.50 (www. missselfridge.com)

ASOS High Neck Jumper with Cable Sleeves, £30 asos.com

BUY IT

NOW After getting a sneaky preview of the collections coming to brand new online retailer OwntheLook.com, we can hardly wait to get shopping

Lace mesh long-sleeved blouse, £19.99, OwntheLook. com

GET SHIRTY

The classic white button-down takes a back seat for spring, as deconstructed shirts come to the fore, with workmanlike blue playing up the mannish associations. Styled simply, these remixed staples elevate an ensemble with minimal eﬀort. ❖ V by Very Deep Cuﬀ Cotton Shirt, £30 (www.very.co.uk)

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

HAVANA BALL Flamenco flounce has been making waves on the catwalks for a couple of seasons now, but this summer the trend really comes into its own on the high street, with an injection of steamy Cuban style. Ruffled dresses and blouses have been rendered in sunset shades and tropical prints, ready for balmy nights on the beach (or the dance floor). ❖ Autograph Top, £45; Collection Trousers, £29.50, Marks & Spencer

STYLE STEAL

Combining dark florals and an abundance of ruffles, the Peacocks Signature collection, which lands in March, offers lots of drama for your dosh. Pair this lace blouse with a leather skirt and over-the-knee boots for a fiercely feminine look. ❖ Peacocks Black Blouse, £18

KNOT A PROBLEM

Another case of remixing rather than reinventing, a profusion of ties, knots, belts and bows was seen everywhere, from Alexander Wang (sporty drawstrings) to Proenza Schouler (loose obi belts). ❖ Closet London Tie Front Shirt with 3/4 Length Sleeves, £52 ❖ Miss Selfridge Tie Front Tea Dress, £25

Peacocks Halter Double Layer Dress, £16

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

INTERIORS

A ¿ QUEST ON OF

e t s ta NEUTRALS HAVE HAD THEIR MOMENT AND NOW IT’S TIME TO BE BRAVE AND BOLD. TAKE INSPIRATION FROM NATURE, INDUSTRIAL SPACES AND MOODS AND THEME YOUR HOME SPECIAL.

t's easy to follow the crowd in interiors, and play it safe with decor that looks the business but doesn't really excite. If you're yearning to break loose and willing to experiment, however, there are some terriﬁc trends this year. You could be adventurous and go a little wild - Africa's the hot destination inﬂuencing our taste for 2017 - or stay cool and dip into blues,

which have the power to transform any space. If that doesn't ﬂoat your boat, go tactile and embrace 'touch me' textures. Don't feel restricted to strictly replicating one look either; it's actually more fun to make a style your own by using elements from each in a unique mix. There are no rules - after all, it's your home, and you'll enjoy it more if it really reﬂects your taste...

NATURE, BOY

Exploring the world through our homes is all the rage this year. Africa's currently the favourite decor destination, and its signature palette of warm earthy shades works so well with pared-back contemporary interiors. "This is a modern style inspired by a global tradition. Our Tribe collection draws inspiration from key elements of modern African design, from bold prints to intricate embroidery and ornate carvings," says Sue Roberts, design director at House of Fraser. DECOR TIP: Go wild with bold jungle prints, or tame it down with a subtle approach to a colour scheme and choose a palette of dusky browns, luscious greens and rusty oranges reminiscent of an African savannah. GET THE LOOK: House of Fraser's grey and white Linea Tribe Print Duvet Set, £50, would be well complemented by an Illini Geo Bedspread, £150, and a monochrome

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

Zebra cushion, £6, from George Home; Stitched velvet cushion, chartreuse, £25, available from Marks and Spencer; Pattern vase, £15, from George Home

TOUCHY FEELY

Texture is the buzzword for interiors in 2017, and it's all about mixing matt finishes with gloss, and rough-hewn with sleek, streamlined pieces. "This year, the emphasis within people's homes will be on on an intensely natural environment. Textures and tones will reflect the beauty of nature, with a few modern touches thrown in for emphasis," says Stacey Sibley, creative director at Alexander James Interior Design. "Think rough, natural woods for everything from floorboards to tables to shutters, textured glass and ceramics for lighting, and then accessorise with matte glazed dinnerware, wooden servingware and earthenware bowls. "A soft palette of greys, light browns and whites tinged with pink will complement a scheme which celebrates the grain of wood and stone and the beauty of craftsmanship." DECOR TIP: Graphic art, whose themes focus on nature's textures - from blades of grass to pebbles - is another way to embrace this look. GET THE LOOK: Make a feature of a bespoke piece from Titchmarsh & Goodwin, such as an English Oak Console Table, with brass handles, which starts from £1,620. Freestanding, distinctive pieces suit this unstructured informal style, and a bleached mango wood and antique brass-plated iron frame Chevron Shelving Unit (which would make a striking room divider), £449, is a gem from Atkin & Thyme. Details really count for this style, so shop around for treats at Marks & Spencer, which is on top of all the trends this season. Their Short Hammered Vase, £19.50, has a lovely metallic sheen, and I love their chartreuse Stitched Velvet Cushion, £25. Go rustic with a Triple Hurricane Lantern, £15, Dunelm.

MOODY BLUES

Blues still rule in interiors, despite competition from green, the hot newcomer making its name on the decor block. "Blues are making another comeback this season, with the resurgence of beautiful cobalt and azure shades, paired with glamorous metallic accents for a bold luxe look," says Paula Taylor, colour and trends specialist at Graham & Brown. "They're so versatile and easy on the eye and suit any look, from traditional to ultra modern. For a more subtle refresh, mix with bright whites and hints of red or green for a spring update. Designer Kelly Hoppen's Ikat wallpaper [£23 a roll], in a vivid Prussian blue, is perfect for a classic style statement and works with both neutral shades as well as a richer colour palette." DECOR TIP: Dulux's Colour of the Year is a greeny ocean blue, Denim Drift: Easycare Matt Emulsion, £26.48 for 2.5L. GET THE LOOK: Designer's Guild Majolica wallpaper, in arabesque cobalt, £195 a roll, is stunning, with a design which cleverly combines a painterly technique with a tile eﬀect. Gatsby furniture from Next, upholstered in gorgeous dark teal matt velvet, has a fashionable modern luxe look but a highly aﬀordable price tag, with a sofa starting from

OUR CHOICES URBAN JUNGLE

GOLD GLAMOUR

Amber chair, in Nyanga, tan, £599, available from Marks and Spencer

Short hammered vase, gold, £19.50, available from Marks and Spencer

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

MOODY BLUES

Ceramic patchwork vase, £20, available from Next

INTERIORS

THE RULE OF FINDING YOUR WAY TO A SUCCESSFUL STYLE CAN BE A TRICKY JOURNEY, AND ONLY A LUCKY FEW CAN AFFORD TO HIRE AN INTERIOR DESIGNER TO DO THE JOB FOR THEM. BUT FEAR NOT, BECAUSE WE’VE ASKED THREE EXPERTS TO REVEAL THEIR INSIDER SECRETS, SO YOU CAN CREATE ROOMS THAT STUN THIS YEAR... WINNING DESIGN Daniela Tasca York, 31, was recently named this year's winner of BBC Two's The Great British Design Challenge. The mother-oftwo's now running her own interiors business, with a range of wallpaper and accessories (www.danielatascayork.co.uk).

MY STYLE: "I'd describe it as modernist, clean and uncluttered but luxurious. I always add a touch of humour, with poster art or unusual touches; my most treasured piece is a massive buffalo skull!" MY HOME: "In our last home, I worked a Mediterranean vibe; very white, clean and minimal with art everywhere. Our open plan living room featured mid-century and reclaimed furniture, and I ramped up the feeling of space with one wall of ﬂoor-toceiling mirrors, and on the opposite wall, ﬁtted cup-

boards clad in wood strips to resemble panelling. A gold leaf effect in the hall added a dazzling, shimmering effect." TREND FORECAST: "We've waved goodbye to that harsh industrial look, and instead Eighties style - all fun, freedom and a rock 'n' roll attitude to colour, pattern and effects, using vibrant, bubblegum shades - will make an impact. The approach will be more luxe than in the past and will feature beautiful ﬁnishes and materials, such as marbles and metallics, as well as plush fabrics like velvets. MY ADVICE: "Be brave if you want to be your own interior designer. Feel free to experiment, and inspiration can come from ﬁlms, books, exhibitions and holidays. If you want to step into summer fast, embrace 'tropical' with masses of leaf palm prints, which have taken the

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high street by storm." MOOD MAKER Designer Abigail Ahern is renowned for her trademark dark, moody colour palette and glamorous settings.

MY STYLE: "Generally it's quite masculine - I'm not a feminine type - and it's also glamorous, layered and edgy, as opposed to pretty. I take inspiration from a range of different styles, so its eclectic." MY HOME: "My whole house is painted in dark shades, from black to midnight blue and my colour-ofthe-moment from my range, Madison Grey, a swampy rainforest colour with undertones of green. Conventional wisdom dictates you should have one focal point, but I have at least three or four and create them by using a couple of oversized objects, like lamps, a collection of cush-

Zebra cushion, £6, from George Home; Stitched velvet cushion, chartreuse, £25, available from Marks and Spencer; Pattern vase, £15, from George Home

OUR CHOICES OFFICE CHIC

ORIENT EXPRESS

Black Lacquer Horn Chair, £495, available from Orchid Abigal Ahern’s Tribal Collection (L-R) Cushion, £32; Zebra cushion, £42; Pom Pom cushion, £28, all from Debenhams

ions or a mantel arrangement, so when people walk in, they can't work out the room instantly. That makes a space surprising, intriguing and exciting. "I use different textures in rooms in the same way I use herbs and spices for cooking, as they make everything look more luxurious than it is. Lighting is fundamental to a successful home; I have ﬁve chandeliers and one in the garden." TREND FORECAST: "A strong tribal trend's on its way, which is reﬂected in my new collection for Debenhams (www.debenhams.com, prices start from £20), inspired by Africa's colours and patterns. It's textural, with splashes of colour and features exotic animals. All things artisanal will be huge this year, whether that's beautifully carved furniture, giant handmade urns, or woven textiles. We're living in

Draco red dragon ceramic table lamp, £336, available from Artisanti

I THINK THERE'LL BE A GROWING AWARENESS ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF HOW OUR SPACES SUIT US AND ENHANCE OUR LIVES exciting times in interiors, because people are embracing the transformative power of colour and are prepared to take more risks with their spaces." MY ADVICE: "I believe in anarchy and not following the rules. It's all about enjoying yourself, letting your rooms 'wear' your favourite colours, in the same way you wear clothes in your favourite shades, because they make you feel good. Follow that and the effect will be edgier, cool, playful and a world away from a bland setting which looks like 'decorating by numbers'."

NATURAL HARMONY Designer Oliver Heath, who ﬁrst found fame in BBC's Changing Rooms in the late-Nineties, is an expert in sustainable architecture and interior design.

MY STYLE: "I take a human-centred approach to design and focus on how the spaces where we live and work can beneﬁt the way we feel. Spaces affect our mood, behaviour and energy levels, so I look to use design to enhance and improve our health and wellbeing." MY HOME: "I'm much more concerned about the way the space makes me and the family feel, rath-

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

er than how it looks. We've refurbished our Sixties house in Brighton so that it's completely eco-friendly. Throughout, we have warm, cosy, social spaces and the heart of our home is our dining area in the middle of our open-plan living room. The natural materials throughout help us connect with nature, so lots of wood panelling and brushed oak flooring. "Maximising light's so important because it influences mood, and we have huge picture windows, sliding doors to a garden, and blinds and curtains from Hillarys (www.hillarys.co.uk) to control light and minimise heat loss." TREND FORECAST: "I think there'll be a growing awareness about the importance of how our spaces suit us and enhance our lives. In my bedroom at home, I've used an Icelandic shelter look - the Scandinavian trend is so strong - which is simple and conjures a rich, warming, sensory feel for a space that's like a big warm hug. Homes should always cosset and comfort us." MY ADVICE: "We live such fast-moving, technology-filled, stressful lives that many of us have lost sight of the things which make us feel good, happy and healthy. Instead, we should be inspired by those things and organise our spaces so we connect, whether that's opening up a room into a garden, creating somewhere the family can easily gather, or using materials and textures which help conjure different moods."

BEAUTY

2 BOLD LIPS AND BRIGHT EYES - HERE’S WHAT’S IN FOR SPRING 2017

"Make-up that has been somewhere and done something... Lived!" is how Alex Box described the look at the Veronique Leroy show at Paris Fashion Week last September, and that's an apt description for the prevailing attitude when it comes to SS17 beauty. Smudgy black eyeliner was ubiquitous, skin was glowing - almost raw - and even where colour was prominent, there was a real freedom to it. Hair had an equally unhurried feel, but make no mistake - it takes some doing to look this undone. Here's how to tap into spring's carefree mood... 1 3ina The Pencil Eye Shadow in 111 Black, £6.95 (www.3ina.com) 2 Paul & Joe Eyebrow Pen in Brown 02, £14 (BeautyBay.com)

3 Too Faced Brow Quickie Brush-on Brow Fiber Gel in Universal Brunette, £17 4 Max Factor Color Elixir Universal Lip Liner, £4.99, Boots 5 Kiko Cream Crush Lasting Colour Eyeshadow in Pearly Electric Blue, currently reduced to £4.80 from £6.90 (www.kikocosmetics.com) 6 Nars Soft Matte Concealer, £23 (narscosmetics. co.uk) Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

STEAL OF THE

WEEK

Save £34 on this GHD dual kit of straightener and travel hairdryer until the end of March. GHD Ultimate Travel Gift Set, £180 (www. ghdhair.com)

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BOOKS

Shelf portraits A LINE MADE BY WALKING BY SARA BAUME is published in hardback by William Heinemann, priced £12.99 (ebook £9.49). Sara Baume’s work does not rely on narrative. Her writing flourishes because instead of depending on plot devices, it takes time to thoroughly explore the minds of its protagonists. Her first work, Spill Summer Falter Wither, focused on the mind of a man who socialised predominately with his dog. Her second, A Line Made By Walking, focuses on that of Frankie, a young artist who, failing to master city life, retreats to her deceased grandmother’s bungalow in the countryside. Whilst there, Frankie finds her days pass her by, achieving very little, but eventually she begins to seek comfort and artistic inspiration in the nature that surrounds her. Baume’s sophomore effort is a masterclass in the power of prose. Frankie’s depression and insecurities unfold in the most three-dimensional of ways. They do not feel like plot devices, but instead permeate the novel as they do life. A brilliant work that will likely resonate with anyone who’s ever felt a little lost in their twenties and beyond.

9/10

BY SAM PRINCE

CITY OF FRIENDS BY JOANNA TROLLOPE is published in hardback by Mantle, priced £18.99 (ebook £7.12). Emotional turmoil - often hidden beneath a facade of brave faces and stiff-upper-lip normality - is among the trademarks of Joanna Trollope’s contemporary work, whether it’s affairs of the heart, family issues, bereavement, betrayal and a variety of social dilemmas. Her 20th novel centres on four ambitious female friends who have shared joys and heartache since university and are now nearing their fifties and in high-flying careers. But the dynamics of the group change when one of them is sacked and there follows a series of complications arising from betrayals, interwoven through both their professional and private lives, which threaten the future

of the friendships. Told in chapters focusing on each of the four protagonists individually, Trollope’s work cleverly tackles contemporary issues and raises the age-old question: can women have it all? Her observations are as astute as ever, as female friendships, tricky teenagers, fractured families, elderly relatives and workplace issues are all thrown into the mix. She makes an excellent case for the viewpoint that having an enjoyable job can save a woman’s sanity.

8/10

BY HANNAH STEPHENSON

UNDER THE ALMOND TREE BY LAURA MCVEIGH is published in hardback by Two Roads, priced £17.99 (ebook £11.99). “We don’t choose the stories we tell,” writes Laura McVeigh in Under The Almond Tree’s afterword, “they choose us.” The story that has chosen this Irish-born Londoner concerns a family of Afghani refugees ﬂeeing the wreckage of their country following the Taliban’s uprising. Seen from the viewpoint of Samar, a young girl with a passion for Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina, they eventually ﬁnd sanctuary in two cabins of the Trans-Siberian Express, travelling back and forward on the line, making a home of perpetual movement. In her former work, McVeigh was Executive Director of PEN International, and her belief in the power of literature to transform lives shines through. A novel look at displacement and belonging, and of how we make sense of the world through story, it falls short through McVeigh never quite managing to believably bridge the gap between her own world and Samar’s.

5/10

BY ADAM WEYMOUTH)

FELIX THE RAILWAY CAT BY KATE MOORE is published in hardback by Michael Joseph, priced £12.99 (ebook £9.49). Cover-based book-judgers rejoice: here we have a cat, in a railway porter’s hat. Felix is the Huddersﬁeld station’s Senior Pest Controller, and Kate Moore’s account of her Facebook-fuelled rise to international stardom

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expands on this photo in high spirits and good faith, with royalties supporting a national cancer charity. Felix’s arrival as an objectively ado rable kitten and subsequent winning over of staff and passengers is a success story of treats, pigeons and extensive napping for cat and reader alike, the lives of those lucky enough to serve alongside her forming an inoffensive backdrop of human highs and lows, captured through railway’s agreeably rose-tinted lenses. Hearts may or may not be warmed: train nostalgists can reminisce of an era when station mogs were not uncommon (and passengers weren’t called ‘customers’) while the rest of us might marvel at how potently social media and photos of cats unite the masses, gently sedating us against the next post down... Go with the cover on this one in complete confidence.

5/10

MICHAEL ANDERSON

CHILDREN’S BOOK OF THE WEEK: I DON’T WANT CURLY HAIR BY LAURA ELLEN ANDERSON is published in paperback by Bloomsbury, priced £6.99 (ebook £4.68). All girls (and let’s face it, most boys too) grow up with bits they don’t like. For me, like the corkscrewbonced narrator in Lauren Ellen Anderson’s charming new picture book, it was my curly hair. “It’s messy and silly and just plain UNFAIR!” she moans, adding the mantra for all curlytops around the world: “I want my hair STRAIGHT. I want my hair... smooth. I want it to ﬂow through the air when I move.” So she tries everything - books, balloons, sticky tape - to tame her frizzy locks, before meeting a straight-haired girl, who (guess what?) wants BIG hair. And together, the new friends discover they actually have more fun when they like their hair. Anderson’s cute and brilliantly funny illustrations make our protagonist bounce oﬀ the page and at it’s core, is a message of learning to accept our looks, however old we are.

8/10

BY KATE WHITING)

HEALTH

LONELINESS IS EXPERIENCED BY MANY PEOPLE AS THEY GET OLDER, AND FOR THOSE LIVING WITH DEMENTIA, THAT FEELING OF ISOLATION CAN BE EVEN WORSE. RESEARCH BY THE ALZHEIMER’S SOCIETY HAS FOUND NEARLY TWO-THIRDS (63%) OF PEOPLE WITH DEMENTIA WHO LIVE ALONE ARE LONELY, AND A SIMILAR PROPORTION FEEL ANXIOUS OR DEPRESSED. BUT IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THAT WAY - AND CHANCES ARE, YOU CAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Can you help someone feel a little less

LITTLE TIME, BIG DIFFERENCE As little as a few minutes, whenever you can ﬁt it in, can make an enormous difference to a person with dementia, and that’s why the Alzheimer’s Society is trying to recruit as many volunteers as possible to its burgeoning Side by Side campaign, which pairs volunteers and people with dementia based on shared interests. Kathryn Smith, Alzheimer’s Society’s director of operations, is a Side by Side volunteer herself. “Loneliness is a real problem for people with dementia, yet we know that one of the most important things for those affected is to remain part of their community and continue to do the things they love - from going shopping to enjoying a football match,” she says. “Side by Side, offering one-to-one support, is a vital step to making this a reality.” Smith points out that, in the UK, around 225,000 in will develop the condition this year, and 850,000 are currently living with dementia - a ﬁgure that’s set to rise to one million by 2021. “So it’s vital we all unite and do what we can to make a meaningful difference,” she stresses.

only leaving the house once a month. That’s where Side by Side can make a real difference. The initiative isn’t asking volunteers to give huge chunks of their time, just as much as they can spare occasionally, to simply accompany a person with dementia to something they’d like to do - this could mean going to a football match or a local garden centre with them, strolling in the park, keeping them company while going shopping or attending appointments, or simply having a chat over a cup of tea, or even on the phone (the scheme is also looking for volunteers just to ring people with dementia and chat with them). Smith was paired with a woman who loved to go out for lunch, which is what they did together, and has also been matched with a man who likes horses; Smith rides so the two immediately had a shared interest. “Sometimes he might not want to go out at all, he might just want some company, and that’s ﬁne,” she says. “Loneliness is one of the biggest problems for people with dementia, and we’ve got a big list of people waiting to be matched up with volunteers.”

LOST FRIENDS The campaign was ﬁrst piloted in 2014, after research found people with dementia were more at risk of loneliness. A third said they’d lost friends since their diagnosis, and a few didn’t even tell friends they had dementia. And while two-thirds of people with dementia still live in the community, many feel trapped in their own homes, with almost one in 10

MUTUAL SUPPORT Side by Side is currently available in 29 locations nationwide, and it’s hoped the scheme will have been rolled out further by the end of the year, as it now has a waiting list of almost 2,000 people with dementia. The Alzheimer’s Society provides volunteers, who must be over 18 and undergo a criminal records check, with online training to give them a basic awareness of dementia,

L O N

MEETING WINNIE WAS A BREATH OF FRESH AIR; WE CLICKED FROM THE START AND HAVE HAD SOME GREAT DAYS OUT ROAMING AROUND CHARITY SHOPS AND HAVING CUPS OF TEA AND CAKE.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

plus things like health and safety. A ‘matching meeting’ is then held with the volunteer, the person they’ve been paired with and their family, and a Side by Side coordinator. “We make sure you’re going to hit it off,” says Smith, “and if you don’t, it’s perfectly ﬁne for either person to say they don’t think the match will work and can they try someone else - although I don’t think that’s happened yet. “Even if you’ve only got half an hour available once a month, there’ll be somebody you can support with that. Or if there’s something you already like doing, like going for a walk in the park, just take the person you’re matched with too. Some real

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friendships are being built through this.” WE LOVE IT! Current Side by Side volunteers have said they’ve gained and shared skills, developed new friendships and even enhanced their CV by taking part in the scheme. Irene Woodward, 66, who has dementia and lives in Leicester, says since meeting Side by Side volunteer Winnie Horton, her life has changed for the better. “I was at a low point when I ﬁrst met Winnie - my partner had died and then I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Meeting Winnie was a breath of fresh air; we clicked from the start

and have had some great days out roaming around charity shops and having cups of tea and cake. Without sounding pleased about my condition, I want to enjoy this stage of Alzheimer’s as much as I can. My father had dementia, so I’m aware of what might be ahead, but my attitude is that life is precious and still worth living.” Fiona Phillips, broadcaster and Alzheimer’s Society ambassador, was recently paired with Irene too, because they share a love of football. “Both my parents had dementia, and I wish a service like Side by Side had been in place for my mum and dad,” says Phillips. “Just because someone has dementia, doesn’t mean they can’t keep do-

ing the things they enjoy - they may just need a little support. “It was wonderful spending the day with Irene and sharing our passion for football by watching our rival teams - Leicester City and Chelsea - play at the King Power Stadium. We had so many laughs together and it was inspiring to witness ﬁrst-hand what a difference Side by Side volunteers can make to people living with dementia.”

TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT VOLUNTEERING FOR SIDE BY SIDE, VISIT WWW. ALZHEIMERS.ORG.UK OR CALL 0330 333 0804. FOR THE ALZHEIMER’S SOCIETY NATIONAL DEMENTIA HELPLINE, CALL 0300 222 1122.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

WELEDA LAVENDER BODY WASH, £7.95 (WELEDA. CO.UK) No time for a soak in the tub? Wash away the stresses of the day with a quick shower with this creamy body wash, made with lavender essential oil and skin-pampering sesame oil.

TRAVEL

y heart is pounding as I shufﬂe towards the end of a narrow platform suspended 150 feet above the lush green canopy of Monteverde’s Cloud Forest. Is it too late to chicken out, I wonder, as a long rope is attached to the harness around my waist and I feel my legs turn to jelly? Clearly it is, because a gate is opening and I’m about to launch myself into the unknown... How did I end up here? Sandwiched between Nicaragua and Panama at the southern tip of Central America, Costa Rica has both Caribbean and Paciﬁc coastlines butsunbathing isn’t what I’ve got in mind. I’m here to indulge my adventurous side, baby-bungee jumping, zip-wiringand rafting through strikingly diverse landscapes.

Travelling as part of an organised tour, we first head to Manuel Antonio on the Pacific coast for a surfing lesson. I’ve attempted this devilishly difficult sport once before, and strong waves mean my second stab isn’t any more accomplished. I try to stand upright but crash onto the seafloor and am forced to limpout of the water, kneecap throbbing. I’m tempted to give up there and then, but I persevere and within the hour I’m catching waves left, right and centre, and remain standing all the way to the shore. As well as being a surfer’s paradise, Manuel Antonio is also famous for its national park, comprised of verdant forest, muddy mangroves and azure marine reserves. You can follow the clearly mapped trails independently, but for wildlife spotting, a guide is recommended.

Without the expert eyes of Efrain, who grew up in the area before it was designated a national park, there’s no way I would have spotted the tiny orange arboreal crabs scuttling in the damp undergrowth, or the snoozing ‘perezoso’ hanging upside down from a leafy branch far above our heads. Translated literally as ‘lazy bear’, this grey furball is one of the country’s famously sedentary mammalian residents, a two-toed sloth. He looks soaking wet, like he’s just had a bath, and through Efrain’s telescope, I can see his shiny brown snout and sleepy eyes. A slow metabolism and veggie diet are the reason that sloths move like they’re wading through treacle and sleep for up to 18 hours a day. No wonder they look like they’re always smiling. The next time I spy a furry twotoed cutie, however, I’m in the midst

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of a decidedly more energetic activity. I’m perched on the side of a bright red inflatable raft, paddling for dear life as we course down the fast-flowing Balsa River, close to the town of La Fortuna. Don’t be fooled, as I was, into thinking white-water rafting is simply a case of letting the current carry you along. You have to paddle - hard - to make sure you take the right path through rapids, and follow orders (‘lean in!’, ‘get down!’) when you hit the really rocky patches. It’s insanely fun. I even enjoy the moment we turn back to ‘surf’ a fierce-looking rapid and I’m thrown overboard. My guide, Marco, pulls me spluttering from the water, hanging on with all my might and grinning from ear to ear as we hit more frothy torrents. And the thrills don’t end there. About

IT’S WELL KNOWN FOR ITS BEACHES AND WILDLIFE, BUT EXTREME SPORTS ARE THE BEST REASON TO VISIT COSTA RICA, SAYS KATIE WRIGHT

the THEFACTFILE

One of Costa Rica’s famous red-eyed tree frogs.

30 miles south, following a bus ride along steep and winding roads, it becomes clear why they call this a cloud forest, as ﬂuffy marshmallow shapes obscure the mountaintops. Monteverde is renowned for its rich botanical life. In the 1950s, biologists came here to study the thousands of insect and animal species that populate the area. To assist with their research, they introduced an activity that has become one of Costa Rica’s most popular tourist pastimes. Instead of climbing up and down trees all day, they realised it was faster to hook wires between the treetops and use a harness to shoot between them. Et voila, zip lining was born, and Costa Rica is now considered the best place in the world to do it. Starting off in seated pose, legs crossed and gloved hands on the wire keeping me

steady, I hurtle along several sections - each getting progressively longer. Eventually, I switch into a ‘superman’ pose, lying face down with arms outstretched. Soaring like a bird along a 1.5km stretch, 100 metres above the hills, is exhilarating. The same goes for the ﬁnale of my canopy tour, which is when I ﬁnd myself jelly-legged and about to leap off that sky-high platform. I feel an almighty lurch in my stomach as I plummet to the ground, before the rope of the ‘tarzan swing’ pings into action and I swoop upwards, whooping with delight (and relief). I’m shaking as I’m lowered to safety, adrenaline coursing through my veins. On the bus back to capital city San Jose, when my heart rate has just about returned to normal, my ba-

Katie Wright was a guest of Tucan Travel (www. tucantravel.co.uk; 020 8896 1600) who oﬀers the nine-day Costa Rica Nature Trails tour from £769pp, including entry to Manuel Antonio National Park, entry to Monteverde Cloud Forest Reserve, all accommodation, four breakfasts, and a Tucan Travel tour leader. Tucan Travel oﬀers group tours and tailor-made adventures worldwide.

Costa Rican rainforest by-bungee jump experience has got me wondering if I could tackle the real thing, and I’ve heard there’s a pectacular place nearby to do it... Alas, my time in this action-packed

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

paradise has come to an end, and there are only so many unforgettable ﬁrsts I can pack into one trip. That bungee jump will have to wait for next time.

FILM

ALSO RELEASED THIS WEEK

LOGAN’S RUN COMES TO AN END

FILM OF THE WEEK: LOGAN ★★★★✩ (15, 137 mins) Starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Dafne Keen, Stephen Merchant, Boyd Holbrook, Richard E Grant, Elizabeth Rodriguez. Director: James Mangold.

ime waits for no mutant in Hugh Jackman’s grim and explosively violent swansong as one of the most iconic characters in the X-Men universe. Set in the year 2029, Logan paints a bleak portrait of super-powered beings on the verge of extinction in a brutal, intolerant world that destroys what it cannot understand. Director James Mangold turbocharges the muscular action sequences including several bruising skirmishes between the lead character and his pursuers that invariably end with those razor-sharp claws slicing through flesh like a hot knife through butter. There is plenty of spectacle here, punctuating a moving story of unconventional families in crisis, exemplified by the touching relationship between the title character and his 90-year-old surrogate father, Professor Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart). When protegee defies mentor, the script arms Stewart with some crisp and occasionally potty-mouthed rebukes: “I wish I could say you were a good pupil, but the words would choke me!” These outbursts are tinged with regret and a mournful acknowledge-

ment that no one is immune from death’s icy grasp - not even a man of science, who can supposedly stop the tick-tock of time with the power of his mind. World-weary Logan (Jackman) lives under his birth name, James Howlett, in a tumbledown ranch in the desert, where he cares for ailing Professor Xavier (Stewart) aided by albino tracker Caliban (Stephen Merchant). Logan’s abilities as Wolverine are waning - pus oozes from his knuckles when he retracts his Adamantium claws and his body no longer selfheals. He earns a meagre wage as a chauffeur to pay for medication to alleviate the Professor’s violent psychic seizures, which paralyse humans and mutants alike within an ever-expanding radius. Out of the blue, a nurse called Gabriela (Elizabeth Rodriguez) contacts Logan and offers him 50,000 US dollars to drive a mysterious girl called Laura (Dafne Keen) to “a place up north” called Eden. The child is a vital link to a new generation of mutants and is being pursued by Transigen head surgeon Dr Zander Rice (Richard E Grant).

Logan hits the road accompanied by Professor Xavier and Laura, with Transigen’s thuggish head of security, Donald Pierce (Boyd Holbrook), in hot pursuit. En route, Logan discovers secrets about his inglorious past and reluctantly takes on the role of the little girl’s snarling protector. Logan strikes a contemplative tone, which sets it apart from the other standalone Wolverine films. Director Mangold and fellow scriptwriters Scott Frank and Michael Green relish the freedom to explore familiar characters with fresh eyes. They adopt a leisurely pace, closing one chapter of the X-Men mythology while potentially opening another. Strong performances from Jackman and Stewart, whose on-screen partnership began 17 years ago, coupled with a sparkling film debut for 11-year-old Keen, ensure a fitting send-off.

VERDICT The first XMen film 19 years ago arguably sparked the whole superhero resurgence. This film brings that story to a fitting end with stunning perforamces by Jackman and Stewart.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

FIST FIGHT (15, 91 mins) Ice Cube squares up to Charlie Day in this madcap comedy directed by Richie Keen, about a fight between two teachers on the last day of term. At Roosevelt High School, students are running amok and most of the staff working under Principal Tyler (Dean Norris) are powerless to maintain control of the senior class. Fiery-tempered history teacher Ron Strickland (Ice Cube) is the only member of faculty willing to challenge the students and meet their mischief with his own, if necessary. Mild-mannered English teacher Andy Campbell (Day), who is about to become a parent for a second time with his adoring wife Maggie (JoAnna Garcia), is certainly no match for the teenagers. During a fraught morning, Andy and Ron catch one of the students overriding the remote controls of a school TV using an app on his smartphone. Ron becomes so enraged by the prank that he destroys the phone and then takes an axe to the joker’s desk. The two men are summoned before Principal Tyler to explain their actions and Andy’s version of events leads to Ron losing his job. In retaliation, the history teacher challenges Andy to a fist fight in the playground in front of the students. Andy is a weakling next to Ron, so begs PE teacher Coach Crawford (Tracy Morgan) to prepare him for the skirmis

FILM

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CERTAIN WOMEN

Blood-soaked episode gets the Downton treatment NEW RELEASE VICEROY’S HOUSE ★★★✩✩ (12A, 106 mins) Hugh Bonneville, Gillian Anderson, Manish Dayal, Huma Qureshi, Michael Gambon, Simon Callow, David Hayman, Lily Travers, Tanveer Ghani, Denzil Smith, Neeraj Gabi, Simon Williams. Director: Gurinder Chadha.

ritish Punjabi director Gurinder Chadha explores the 1947 partition of India from myriad perspectives in the lustrous period drama Viceroy’s House. This chocolate box of historical fact and forbidden romance, a la Romeo And Juliet, aims for a similar collision of upstairs downstairs affairs of the heart as Robert Altman’s film Gosford Park and ITV costume drama Downton Abbey. The script’s frothy rendering of a dark, blood-soaked episode on the subcontinent, which resulted in the mass migration of 14 million people, is epitomized by one emotionally charged scene. Hindu and Muslim servants at the eponymous residence come to blows over their beliefs and the viceroy’s dour, Scottish head of household (David Hayman) is knocked to the floor in the commotion. “It’s worse than Glasgow on a Saturday night!” he deadpans, dusting himself off. Chadha and co-writers Paul Mayeda Berges and Moira Buffini distil complex political wrangling into a glossy soap opera, replete with an implausibly tidy and emotionally ma-

nipulative ﬁnal act that shamelessly tugs heartstrings in time with A.R. Rahman’s orchestral score. Lord Louis Mountbatten (Hugh Bonneville) arrives in the swelter of 1947 Delhi at the behest of King George VI to replace Archie Wavell (Simon Williams) as viceroy of India and oversee the transfer of power. Lady Edwina Mountbatten (Gillian Anderson) and daughter Pamela (Lily Travers) also make the journey in the face of shocking reports about sectarian violence. “You’re giving a nation back to its people. How bad can it be?” naively remarks young Pamela as they arrive at a gargantuan residence with 340 rooms, which Edwina pithily observes, “makes Buckingham Palace look like a bungalow”. Louis and chief of staff Lord Ismay (Michael Gambon) host the political elite including Jawaharlal Nehru (Tanveer Ghani), Muhammad Ali Jinnah (Denzil Smith) and Mahatma Gandhi (Neeraj Gabi) to debate the way forward and end the bloodshed. In the absence of compromise, barrister Sir Cyril Radcliffe (Simon Callow) arrives to decide geographic borders that will deﬁne Pakistan. Meanwhile, romance blossoms be-

tween two members of the household - Hindu servant Jeet (Manish Dayal) and Muslim sweetheart Aalia (Huma Qureshi) - who will be torn apart if partition goes ahead. Viceroy’s House apportions sympathy between the central characters, including Lord Mountbatten, who is portrayed as a pawn of a distant British government that intends to implement its crude exit strategy, regardless of the repercussions. Bonneville is an affable scapegoat, while Anderson gets many of the best lines in icy, clipped tones, reminding her husband and his entourage, “We came here to give India her freedom, not tear her apart.” Solid production values evoke the post-war period and Om Puri, who died in January, enjoys a small, yet affecting supporting role as a blind father. Ironically, he’s one of the few people to see the light about the heavy price of division.

DAMON SMITH’S VERDICT Gosford Park meets Downtown Abbey in this chocolate box of historical fact and forbidden romance set in a blood-soaked episode of history.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

(12A, 107 mins) Adapted from the short story collection Both Ways Is The Only Way I Want by Maile Meloy, Certain Women is a sensitively handled portrait of womanhood, which cuts back and forth between the lives of four women in Montana, whose futures gradually become entangled. Small-town lawyer Laura Wells (Laura Dern) is at the end of her tether, dealing with a client, Fuller (Jared Harris), who refuses to heed her advice about the pointlessness of suing his former employers over a workplace accident. She receives a telephone call from local police to tell her that Fuller has returned to his old workplace and taken a security guard hostage. At the behest of the authorities, Laura agrees to enter the building to try to talk Fuller into downing his weapon and ending the siege. Meanwhile, ranch hand Jamie (Lily Gladstone) absent-mindedly follows other drivers to a local school where a young lawyer, Beth Travis (Kristen Stewart), is teaching night classes. Jamie becomes ﬁxated on Beth, who has a four-hour drive each way from her home in Livingston. An awkward friendship blossoms. Elsewhere in the state, Ryan Lewis (James LeGros) and his wife Gina (Michelle Williams) are at odds about how to raise their teenage daughter. Their argument simmers as they plough all of their time and money into building a new home, which would be made easier if a local man, Albert (Rene Auberjonois), would sell them his leftover pile of sandstone for a fair price.

TELEVISION

THE BUCK STOPS WITH ME JAMES NESBITT IS BACK ON SCREENS IN STAN LEE’S LUCKY MAN. HE TELLS SUSAN GRIFFIN HOW HE CAN RELATE TO THE FLAWED SUPERHERO

ames Nesbitt enters the room looking tanned, having just returned from a holiday in Mexico with his two teenage daughters. “This is all real,” he says in his familiar Northern Irish drawl, taking a seat on a sofa. It was a well-deserved break following a busy year. He completed The Secret, about double-murderer Colin Howell, before Christmas 2015. “Then I worked straight from Cold Feet to Lucky Man,” says Nesbitt, 52. “I had such a lovely time but when you come back, you’re straight into it again. I start ﬁlming Cold Feet on Monday.” There was much hype ahead of the Cold Feet crew reuniting after 13 years - could it possibly be the same? But the new series didn’t let anyone down. “Yeah, it went very well, and now we’ve got to do it all over again, which is a responsibility,” says Nesbitt, crossing and uncrossing his legs and arms throughout the conversation. Not only did the reunion allow fans

of the original series to reflect on their own passing years (“Oh yeah, I think Cold Feet held up a lot of mirrors to a lot of people,” Nesbitt nods in agreement), but it introduced the gang to a new audience. “I, in my arrogance, thought everyone had seen the first five series, but quite a lot of people hadn’t. They came to it new, loved it, embraced those characters and really got it, so that’s encouraging,” adds the actor, who considers himself “lucky” that Cold Feet is “such an ensemble piece”. It means he can enjoy time off and regularly return home to London from the Manchester set to see his daughters (he and their mum, Sonia, divorced last year after 22 years of marriage). Stan Lee’s Lucky Man, which returned to Sky1 on February 24 for a second run, is filmed in the capital, but Nesbitt shoulders the responsibility of playing the leading man. “And it really is, at the risk of sounding arrogant, my show,” he says, noting that the pressure of playing a title character isn’t often talked

about. There should be a pressure, because often the buck stops with you.” In the show, created by comic book icon Stan Lee, Nesbitt plays DI Harry Clayton, “a contemporary superhero” who’s been given a bracelet that brings him great luck. There’s plenty of action, which, he remarks, “gives you an excuse to keep fit”. “But as I am a man of a certain age, you do feel a bit stiffer in the morning, a wee bit creaky, but I love that and the fitter you are of body, the fitter you are also of mind. “I’ve always been like that because I enjoy the good things in life, and so to enjoy the good things in life, you’ve got to do the difficult things in life as well.” Aside from working with a personal trainer, Nesbitt has “a mini gym in my trailer”. Sounds fancy? “Too bloody right!” he exclaims. “It becomes your home for six months, so you want to be comfortable. I’ve got a very nice bed too, which I use a lot.” He feels “blessed”, a term he uses

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

frequently, by his success. “The work is full-on but it’s something I always wanted to do. And the fact I still enjoy it and am challenged by it is a blessing. So the balance is pretty good - I think.” In the new series, Harry is “clearly trying to walk the right path”. “Harry didn’t ask for this bracelet,” notes Nesbitt, then pauses as he feels the need to explain himself. “I’m aware when I talk about these things, I have to embrace the genre. It’s ridiculous, but I think what makes it so entertaining is you have to treat it with truth,” he comments before continuing. “Harry’s trying not to use it [the bracelet] because he’s seen the price and that for every good bit of luck, something bad can happen to those he loves. Or that’s what he’s always been led to believe. When we ﬁnd him, he’s trying to be the better man, but of course, all that’s thrown into disarray when Isabella [who’s also got a bracelet, played by Thekla Reuten] arrives.” How would he fare meeting a femme-fatale like Isabella in real life? “I’d be terriﬁed but I’ve got three older sisters, I’ve grown up with them. My mother had three sisters, my granny had three sisters, so I’ve grown up loving but being intimidated by women as well,” he quips. Nesbitt admits the superhero genre isn’t one he was “really that interested in” before embarking on this project. “It just didn’t play a part in my life, but now I’ve embraced it so much, I love it. I think the escapism of the genre is important to people in an ever-changing, complicated world,” he says.

both of us, for the right things. So yes, I recognise a lot in him.” Born and raised in Ballymena, County Antrim, he recalls it being “hard to entertain the notion of being an actor, because it didn’t seem like a real job”. Though not shy as a child, he says, “I was quite isolated”. “I wasn’t lonely by any stretch of the imagination, but I did spend time on my own and I think that can fuel one’s imagination,” he muses. Being Northern Irish “is everything”, and he regularly returns home. “My three best mates are there. My dad’s still there. Two of my sisters are there. I have a company there called G&H Film and Television Services, so do all the facilities for Game Of Thrones. I’ve got a presence there, and have just bought a property by the sea.” His pals often take the mick out of their friend’s career. “Well, they think it’s ridiculous. They don’t think it’s a real job at all,” says Nesbitt, laughing. “But they’ve done rather well from it! “They looked out for me when I was at drama school and impoverished, and now we’ve got to have some fun perks from it... I’ve been very, very lucky. I’m a lucky man!”

I’D BE TERRIFIED BUT I’VE GOT THREE OLDER SISTERS. MY MOTHER HAD THREE SISTERS, MY GRANNY HAD THREE SISTERS, SO I’VE GROWN UP LOVING BUT BEING INTIMIDATED BY WOMEN AS WELL

James Nesbitt in Stan Lee’s Lucky Man

“I think they need that. What’s important about Harry Clayton is that he is flawed. He’s quite anti-heroic in a sense. He’s an addict; he walks a very fine line in terms of the law. He’s lost his wife and his family, he sometimes makes decisions that are questionable, but he errs ultimately on the side of right.” Nesbitt could relate to the character straightaway. “Harry and I are 52 years old and we’ve probably seen a lot, been involved in a lot and had our ups and downs, but we’re still trying to fight,

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

STAN LEE’S LUCKY MAN CONTINUES ON SKY1 ON FRIDAYS

TV PICKS

ANT & DEC’S SATURDAY NIGHT TAKEAWAY 7pm, ITV

The duo’s weekend variety show returns, and this year, the pair have recruited Scarlett Moffatt to become their new co-host.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 10.00 Saturday Kitchen Live (S,HD). 11.30 The Little Paris Kitchen: Cooking with Rachel Khoo (R,S,HD). 12.00 Football Focus (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 2.00 Live Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). Scotland v Wales (Kick-off 2.25pm). 4.30 Final Score (S,HD). 5.10 BBC News (S,HD). 5.20 Regional News (S). 5.30 Celebrity Mastermind (R,S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

TABOO 9.15pm, BBC1

The historical drama created by Tom Hardy, his father Chips, and frequent collaborator Steven Knight comes to an explosive conclusion as the time of reckoning arrives for both James Delaney (Hardy) and his nemesis, the villainous East India Company chairman Sir Stuart Strange (Jonathan Pryce).

BBC2

6.30 Film: They Flew Alone (S) (1942). ●● 8.10 Film: In Which We Serve (S,HD) (1942). ●●●●● 10.00 Britain’s Secret Seas (R,S,HD). 11.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 12.00 Two Greedy Italians: Still Hungry (R,S,HD). 1.00 Film: Waterloo (S,HD) (1970). ●●●● 3.10 Natural World (R,S). 4.00 Mastermind (R,S,HD). 4.30 University Challenge (R,S,HD). 5.00 Only Connect (R,S,HD). 5.30 The House That £100K Built (R,S,HD).

LET IT SHINE 6.45pm, BBC1

The battle of the boy bands is almost over as the three finalists take to the stage one last time, demonstrating their singing and dancing skills in the hope of winning the starring roles.

ITV

6.00 CITV. 7.30 Scrambled! 9.25 ITV News (S). 9.30 Alphabetical (R,S,HD). 10.25 Guess This House (R,S,HD). 11.25 Off Their Rockers (R,S,HD). 11.55 ITV News and Weather (S). 12.00 Film: Free Willy 2: The Adventure Home (S,HD) (1995). ●● 1.50 Tipping Point (R,S,HD). 2.50 The Chase (R,S,HD). 3.50 Regional News (S). 4.00 ITV News and Weather (S). 4.15 Live Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). Ireland v France (Kick-off 4.50pm).

GREAT CANAL JOURNEYS 8pm, Channel 4

Timothy West and Prunella Scales venture into the open sea as they make their way through the islands of Scotland’s coast. Their destination is the rarely used nine-mile Crinan canal on the Mull of Kintyre. However, the Atlantic waves off the coast of Mull force them to head inland to Tobermory.

Channel 4

6.20 Mobil 1 The Grid (S). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 8.30 Frasier (R,S). 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 11.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 12.00 Jamie and Jimmy’s Friday Night Feast (R,S,HD). 1.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD). 3.30 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun (R,S,HD). 4.30 Location, Location, Location (R,S,HD). 5.35 Grand Designs (R,S,HD). A couple build a unique house in Pembrokeshire.

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake!. 10.05 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (R,S,HD). 10.40 Access (S,HD). 10.45 Police Interceptors Unleashed (R,S,HD). 11.15 Police Interceptors (R,S,HD). 1.15 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole (R,S). 3.15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (R,S,HD). 5.15 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords (R,S,HD). A landlady gets a shock when she finally gains access to her property.

6.30 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 55/76. From Ashbourne, Derbyshire.

Great Canal Journeys, 8pm

NCIS, 8pm

6.30 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

6.10 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away (R,S,HD). 4/5. Paul Bohill and Steve Pinner try to repossess a house.

7.00 Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway (S,HD). 1/7. See Choices Above.

7.00 Penelope Keith’s Favourite Villages (R,S,HD). The actress travels around Britain, visiting villages in different parts of the country.

7.05 NCIS: Los Angeles (S,HD). 11/24. The team hunts down a device that could destroy Los Angeles.

8.25 Casualty (S,HD). 25/45. Steph is rushed to hospital when she tries to kill herself, and Connie refuses to treat her. Meanwhile, Iain helps Gem to get a job at the hospital coffee shop.

8.00 Diana: Designing a Princess (S,HD). See Choices Above. 8.30 Dad’s Army (R,S). 2/6. An invasion alert causes chaos.

8.30 The Voice UK (S,HD). The talent contest moves into the Battle phase, in which Tom Jones, Will.i.am, Gavin Rossdale and Jennifer Hudson are expected to shape their protégés into their pop icons.

8.00 Great Canal Journeys (R,S,HD). See Choices Above.

8.00 NCIS (S,HD). 8/24. DiNozzo must help old flame Jeanne Benoit rescue her kidnapped husband. 8.55 5 News Weekend (S,HD).

9.15 Taboo (S,HD). 8/8. See Choices Above.

9.00 My Old Lady (S,HD) (2014). See Choices Above. ●●●

9.00 Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (S,HD) (2014). Premiere. The leader of a colony of intelligent apes tries to prevent his tribe going to war against the human race. Sci-fi thriller sequel, starring Andy Serkis and Jason Clarke. ●●●●

9.00 Football on 5: The Championship (S,HD). George Riley and Lynsey Hipgrave introduce highlights from the weekend’s Championship games, including Leeds United v Sheffield Wednesday in a huge Yorkshire derby at Elland Road.

10.15 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). Followed by National Lottery Update. 10.30 Match of the Day (S,HD). Gary Lineker presents highlights of the latest Premier League matches, including Chelsea v Swansea City at Stamford Bridge and Hull City v Burnley at the KCOM Stadium.

10.45 QI XL (S,HD). 1/16. With Matt Lucas, Lucy Porter and Ross Noble.

11.50 This Country (S,HD). 3/6. Kerry and Kurtan eagerly await the release of their uncle, Steve “Nugget” Nuggins.

11.30 Albert Nobbs (S,HD) (2011). Period drama, starring Glenn Close. ●●●

12.15 Film: Return from the River Kwai (S) (1988). Second World War drama sequel, starring Chris Penn. ●● 1.50 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 1.55 BBC News (S,HD).

1.15 Film: Youth Without Youth (S,HD) (2007). Drama, starring Tim Roth. ●● 3.15 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

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7.30 Grand Tours of the Scottish Islands (S,HD). 2/6. Paul Murton journeys around the coast of the Long Island of Harris and Lewis.

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after

6.00 Pointless Celebrities (R,S,HD). 6/8. A radio-themed edition. 6.45 Let It Shine: Live Final (S,HD). 8/8. See Choices Above.

The Voice UK, 8.30pm

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Grand Tours of the … 7.30pm

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Casualty, 8.25pm

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6 7 8 9

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(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

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EPW-E01-S1

SATURDAY

10.30 ITV News and Weather (S); Weather. 10.45 The Boat That Rocked (S,HD) (2009). An offshore pirate-radio station entertains 1960s Britain, but the authorities are determined to shut it down. Richard Curtis’s comedy, with Bill Nighy and Philip Seymour Hoffman. ●●●

1.10 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). Toyah Willcox hosts a dinner party. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

10.00 Football on 5: Goal Rush (S,HD). Goals from the weekend’s games in Leagues One and Two. 10.30 Stealing the Mona Lisa (S,HD). 5/6. See Choices Above.

11.35 Surrogates (S,HD) (2009). See Choices Above. ●●●

11.30 Police Interceptors Unleashed (R,S,HD). 7/10. PC Barry Peach is confronted by a foul-mouthed pensioner.

1.15 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S). 2.05 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Omnibus. Problems arise between Ste and Harry. 4.15 Kirstie’s Fill Your House for Free (R,S,HD). 4.25 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). The property expert visits Bishop’s Stortford, Hertfordshire. 5.20 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD). General knowledge quiz, hosted by Sandi Toksvig.

12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 That’s So 1985 (R,S). A look at events in 1985. 4.00 Bargain-Loving Brits in the Sun (R,S,HD). Middlesbrough man Michael has great ambitions for his new high-end bar. Last in the series. 4.50 House Doctor (R,S). 5.15 Nick’s Quest (R,S). 5.40 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.50 Roary the Racing Car (R,S).

ITV2

6.00 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 6.10 Emmerdale (S,HD). 8.50 Coronation Street (S,HD). 11.10 Ninja Warrior UK (R,HD). 12.10 Take Me Out (R,S,HD). 1.25 The Brit Awards 2017 (R,S,HD). 3.55 Film: Step Up 3 (S,HD) (2010). ●●● 4.55 FYI Daily (HD). 5.00 Film: Step Up 3 (S,HD) (2010). Concluded. ●●●

This episode looks back to 1911, when one of the most famous pieces of art across the globe, the Mona Lisa, was stolen from the Louvre museum in Paris. As the painting is one of the most written about pieces of art, and also the most expensive, the heist sent shockwaves around the world.

6.00 Young & Hungry (R,S,HD). 6.45 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 7.35 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 8.30 Melissa & Joey (R,S,HD). 9.30 Young & Hungry (R,S,HD). 10.30 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD). 1.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S). 1.15 Film: Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (S,HD) (2009). ●● 3.00 Film: St Trinian’s 2: The Legend of Fritton’s Gold (S,HD) (2009). ●● 5.05 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD).

Sky1

6.00 Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old? (R,S,HD). 7.00 Monkey Business (R,S). 8.00 The Big Spell (R,S,HD). 9.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 10.00 Soccer AM (HD). 11.30 Football’s Funniest Moments (R,HD). 12.00 Portrait Artist of the Year 2017 (R,S,HD). 1.00 Futurama (R,S). 2.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.00 Supergirl (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

Brenda Emmanus explores the stories behind some of the most exquisite dresses owned by Diana, Princess of Wales, some of which are on display in an exhibition at Kensington Palace.

MY OLD LADY 9pm, BBC2

Premiere. A penniless New Yorker hopes to sell his dead father’s flat in Paris, but finds it has an eccentric, elderly tenant. Comedy drama, starring Maggie Smith.

GOLD

7.00 Cheers (S). 7.50 One Foot in the Grave (S). Victor starts a new job. 8.30 To the Manor Born (S). 9.50 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 11.50 The Vicar of Dibley (S). 1.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). 3.10 Only Fools and Horses (S). Christmas special from 1993. Del visits the dentist. 5.00 Only Fools and Horses (S). The council rejects Del’s application for a grant.

American Pie, 9pm

Paul, 9pm

Star Wars: Episode I ... 7pm

Not Going Out, 9pm

6.05 Jack and Jill (S,HD) (2011). Comedy, starring Adam Sandler. ●

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24. Sheldon receives acting lessons. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 15/24.

6.00 MacGyver (R,S,HD). 3/22. The team heads to Malaysia to extract a terrorist group’s financier.

6.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 2/3. The brothers’ finances hit an all-time low.

7.05 FYI Daily (HD). 7.10 Jack and Jill (S,HD) (2011). Concluded. ●

7.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 16/24. 7.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 17/24. Sheldon decides to make new friends.

7.00 Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace (HD) (1999). Sci-fi prequel, with Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor. ●●●

7.40 The Black Adder (S). 1/6. Edmund’s father becomes king.

8.00 Scorpion (S,HD). 12/24. Cabe is wounded by exploding shrapnel during a desert mission, and the team must freeze his body in order to save his life.

8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 13/24. The gang treat themselves to a Sheldon-free weekend. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24.

9.00 American Pie (S,HD) (1999). Four teenage boys make a pact to lose their virginity before the high-school prom, but cause huge embarrassment in the process. Comedy, starring Jason Biggs and Chris Klein. ●●●●

9.00 Paul (S,HD) (2011). A captive alien escapes from a secret military base and seeks the help of two English comicbook geeks in getting to his spaceship. Sci-fi comedy, with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. ●●●●

10.10 FYI Daily (HD). 10.15 American Pie (S,HD) (1999). Concluded. ●●●●

8.20 Blackadder Goes Forth (S). 6/6. Capt Blackadder pretends to be insane.

9.45 Stan Lee’s Lucky Man (R,S,HD). 1/10. Harry meets a mysterious woman wearing a bracelet identical to his. Return of the crime drama co-created by comic-book legend Stan Lee, starring James Nesbitt.

Sky Sports 1

6.00 Football Gold (S). 7.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 8.00 Football Gold (S). 8.30 Premier League Preview (HD). 9.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 10.00 Soccer AM (HD). 11.30 Premier League Preview (HD). 12.00 Live EFL (HD). Leeds United v Sheffield Wednesday (Kick-off 12.30pm). 3.00 Gillette Soccer Saturday (HD). 5.15 Live EFL (HD).

Live EFL, 12pm

10.30 Nissan Match Choice (HD). Extended highlights from the Premier League, allowing viewers to access the latest round of top-flight fixtures.

11.00 Bottom (S). 3/6. Richie 11.45 A League of Their and Eddie prepare for Own (R,HD). 8/10. With their holiday. Nicole Scherzinger, Noel Fielding and James 11.40 Bottom (S). 4/6. Eddie Haskell. hatches a get-rich-quick scheme.

11.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). Chelsea v Swansea City.

12.25 American Dad! (R,S). Stan and Hayley visit a gun theme park. 12.55 Film: Couples Retreat (S,HD) (2009). Comedy, starring Vince Vaughn and Malin Akerman. ●● 1.55 FYI Daily (HD). 2.00 Film: Couples Retreat (S,HD) (2009). Concluded. ●● 3.00 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

12.10 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 1.15 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.20 Gap Year (R,S,HD). 3.15 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (R,S,HD). 4.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.25 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.45 Revenge (R,S,HD). A grief-stricken Emily tries to repair the damage she has caused.

12.45 Duck Quacks Don’t Echo (R,S,HD). 1.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 2.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 2.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S,HD). 4.15 Stop, Search, Seize (R,HD). 5.10 Road Wars (R,S,HD).

12.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 12.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 1.00 Live Fight Night International (HD). 3.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 4.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 4.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 5.00 Premier League Highlights (HD).

RADIO

11.05 Gogglebox (R,S,HD). 5/12. Reactions to programmes including The Apprentice and Spider House.

Westminster. 11.30 From Our Own Correspondent. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Money Box. 12.30 The News Quiz. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 News. 1.10 Any Questions? From Edwinstree Middle School in Hertfordshire 2.00 Any Answers? 2.30 Drama: Herald of Disaster. Drama-documentary about the 1987 capsizing of a cross-channel ferry 4.00 Weekend Woman’s Hour. With Nikki Bedi 5.00 Saturday PM. 5.30 The Bottom Line. 5.54 Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.15 Loose Ends. With guests Goldie, Dr Miriam Stoppard and Daniel Cole 7.00 Profile. With Edward Stourton

Film4

BBC4

11.00 The Violent Men (HD) (1955). ●●● 12.55 Cutthroat Island (1995). ●● 3.15 Carry On Cabby (1963). ●●● 5.00 Mr Popper’s Penguins (HD) (2011). ●●●

6.45 The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (HD) (2010). ●●● 9.00 Pitch Perfect (HD) (2012). A college freshman joins an a cappella singing group made up of social misfits to compete in music competitions. Comedy, starring Anna Kendrick and Rebel Wilson. ●●●● 11.15 It Follows (HD) (2014). After sleeping with her boyfriend for the first time, a teenager is stalked by an unseen, supernatural menace. Horror, starring Maika Monroe. ●●●●

7.00 Indian Hill Railways (R,HD). The lives and loves of workers on the Nilgiri Mountain Railway. 8.00 Timeshift: The People’s Liners – Britain’s Lost Pleasure Fleets (R,HD). 9.00 Treasures of Ancient Egypt (R,HD). How the decline of the Egyptian Empire ran parallel with a creative revival. Last in the series. 10.00 Timewatch: Captain Cook – The Man Behind the Legend (R,HD). 11.00 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 11.30 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 12.05 Arena: Loretta Lynn – Still a Mountain Girl (R,HD). 1.35 Country Kings at the BBC (R,HD). 2.35 Country Queens at the BBC (R,HD). 3.35 Sounds of the Seventies (R,HD). 3.50 Pop Go the Sixties (R,HD).

9.00 Not Going Out (S,HD). 1/6. First episode of the sitcom, starring Lee Mack. 9.40 Not Going Out (S,HD). 2/6. A death in the family brings Tim and Kate closer.

10.20 Not Going Out (S,HD). 10.45 NCIS: Los Angeles 3/6. Lee pretends to be (R,HD). 8/24. A graduate Tim. student developing a weapon for the navy is attacked and the team discovers a connection to international warfare. Kensi continues with her gruelling physical therapy.

Radio 3 7.00am Breakfast. 9.00 News. 9.03 Record Review. 12.15pm Music Matters. 1.00 News. 1.02 Saturday Classics. 3.00 Sound of Cinema. 4.00 Jazz Record Requests. 5.00 Jazz Line-Up. 6.00 Opera on 3: Live from the Met. 10.00 Hear and Now. Midnight Geoffrey Smith’s Jazz. 1.00 Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 iPM. 6.00 News and Papers. 6.07 Ramblings. 6.30 Farming Today This Week. 6.57 Weather. 7.00 Today. 8.51 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament. 9.00 Saturday Live. 10.30 And the Academy Award Goes To. 11.00 The Week in

An FBI agent in a future where people only interact through robot doubles ventures into the real world to catch a killer. Sci-fi thriller, with Bruce Willis.

The Sixth Sense (HD) 8.00 EFL Goals (HD). A round- 1.20 (1999). ●●●●● up of recent matches. 8.30 Nissan Game of the Day (HD). Hayley McQueen presents a full re-run of the day’s top Premier League match.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 13/22. Stewie auditions in drag for a TV show. 11.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 6/22. 11.55 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 8/22.

Radio 1 6.00am Dev. 10.00 The Matt Edmondson Show. 1.00pm Alice Levine. 4.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Danny Howard. 7.00 Asian Network Live. 11.00 The Rap Show with Charlie Sloth. 1.00am DJ Target. 4.00 Diplo and Friends. Radio 2 5.00am Radio 2 Playlists: 21st Century Songs. 6.00 Anneka Rice. 8.00 Sounds of the 60s. 10.00 Graham Norton. 1.00pm Pick of the Pops. 3.00 Jo Whiley. 6.00 Liza Tarbuck. 8.00 Trevor Nelson’s Rhythm Nation. 10.00 The Craig Charles House Party. Midnight Bob Harris Sunday. 3.00 Radio 2’s Showtunes Playlist. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Love Songs.

SATURDAY

SURROGATES 11.35pm, Channel 4

12.20 Bottom Live: The Big Number 2 Tour. Stage show of the comedy series. 2.25 Bill Hicks Live: Revelations. A 1993 performance by the stand-up comedian. 3.30 jam. Blackly comic sketch show. 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys. 7.15 Saturday Review. The week’s cultural highlights 8.00 Archive on 4: 1917: Eyewitness in Petrograd. Emily Dicks explores her grandfather’s memories of the Russian Revolution 9.02 Drama: Ann Veronica. Part one of two. Dramatisation of HG Wells’ novel 10.00 News and Weather. 10.15 The Moral Maze. Michael Buerk chairs a debate on ethical issues 11.00 Brain of Britain. The fifth heat of the general knowledge contest 11.30 Poetry Please. Roger McGough presents poems about parenting Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Martian Stories. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

Radio 5 Live 5.00am 5 Live Sport: The Friday Football Social. 6.00 Saturday Breakfast. 9.00 The Danny Baker Show. 11.00 Fighting Talk. Noon 5 Live Sport. 3.00 5 Live Sport. 5.00 Sports Report. 6.06 6-0-6. 8.00 Kermode and Mayo’s Film Review. 9.00 Stephen Nolan. Midnight 5 Live in Short. 1.00 Up All Night. Classic FM 7.00am Alan Titchmarsh. 10.00 Bill Turnbull. 1.00pm Alexander Armstrong. 3.00 Nicholas Owen. 5.00 Saturday Night at the Movies. 7.00 Alex James’s Date Night. 9.00 David Mellor’s Light Music Matters. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Katie Breathwick. 4.00 Jane Jones.

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EPW-E01-S1

STEALING THE MONA LISA 10.30pm, Channel 5

DIANA: DESIGNING A PRINCESS 8pm, BBC2

RIVERS WITH JEREMY PAXMAN 8pm, Channel 4

TV PICKS

New series. The presenter travels along England’s greatest rivers, exploring the history and wildlife. The first episode focuses on the Tweed.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 7.35 Match of the Day (R,S,HD). 9.00 The Andrew Marr Show (S,HD). 10.00 The Big Questions (S,HD). 11.00 Regional Programme (S). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News (S,HD). 1.15 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 2.15 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 3.15 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 4.00 Songs of Praise (S,HD). 4.35 Shop Well for Less? (R,S,HD). 5.35 BBC News (S,HD). 5.50 Regional News (S).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

CALL THE MIDWIFE 8pm, BBC1

It’s October 1962 and the world is on tenterhooks, as tensions between the Soviet Union and the US look set to boil over. As Poplar responds to the escalating Cuban Missile Crisis, Valerie Dyer is still finding her feet at Nonnatus House and oversees the care of heavily pregnant first-time mother.

BBC2

7.15 An Island Parish: Anguilla (R,S,HD). 7.45 Around the World in 80 Gardens (R,S,HD). 8.45 Countryfile (R,S,HD). 9.45 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites (S). 11.15 Nigel Slater’s Dish of the Day (R,S,HD). 11.45 Nigellissima (R,S,HD). 12.15 MOTD2 Extra (S,HD). 1.00 Holiday of My Lifetime with Len Goodman (R,S,HD). 1.30 Money for Nothing (R,S,HD). 2.15 Wanted Down Under Revisited (R,S,HD). 3.00 Birds of Paradise: The Ultimate Quest (R,S,HD). 4.00 Bobsleigh and Skeleton World Championships (S,HD).

SS-GB 9pm, BBC1

Archer rushes to the rescue after learning of a resistance plan to kidnap his son. But he is trailed every step of the way by Huth and may be placing the boy in even greater danger.

ITV

6.00 CITV. 9.25 Countrywise: Guide to Britain (R,S,HD). Liz Bonnin witnesses the River Severn during one of its massive tidal bores. 10.00 Peston on Sunday (S,HD). 10.55 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). David Van Day is today’s mystery cook. 11.55 ITV News and Weather (S). 12.00 The Voice UK (R,S,HD). 2.00 Live Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). England v Italy (Kick-off 3.00pm). 5.30 Regional News (S). 5.45 ITV News and Weather (S).

DRAGONS’ DEN 8pm, BBC2

Deborah Meaden, Peter Jones, Touker Suleyman, Sarah Willingham and Nick Jenkins assess the profit-making potential of a husband and wife team’s Welsh delicacy, a new male fragrance, and a London businessman’s food delivery service for Michelin star restaurants.

Channel 4

6.15 The King of Queens (R,S). 7.05 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 8.25 Frasier (R,S). 9.30 Sunday Brunch (S,HD). 12.30 The Simpsons (R,S). 2.00 George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces (R,S,HD). A man transforming a private jet into a crash pad. 3.00 Location, Location, Location (R,S,HD). 4.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD). 4.30 Film: 101 Dalmatians (S,HD) (1996). Disney comedy adventure remake, starring Glenn Close. ●●●

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake!. 10.10 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (R,S,HD). 10.45 Football on 5: The Championship (R,S,HD). 11.40 Football on 5: Goal Rush (R,S,HD). 12.10 Inside Windsor Castle (R,S,HD). 1.10 Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh (R,S,HD). 2.10 Film: No Reservations (S,HD) (2007). ●●● 4.10 Film: Bride Wars (S,HD) (2009). Comedy, starring Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway. ●● 5.55 5 News Weekend (S,HD).

11 after

Live Six Nations Rugby Union, 2pm

The Jump, 6.30pm

The EFL Cup Final … 8.15pm

▼

6.00 Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). Action from the third weekend of the tournament.

6.00 Unbelievable Moments Caught on Camera (S,HD). 2/2. Wakeboarders have a memorable encounter with dolphins.

6.30 The Jump (S,HD). The remaining contestants compete in two different disciplines.

6.00 The Fifth Element (S) (1997). Sci-fi adventure, starring Bruce Willis. ●●●●

▼

7.00 Countryfile (S,HD). Matt Baker and Ellie Harrison present the show from the Isle of Man, taking a trip in a horse-drawn tram. Including weather for the week ahead.

7.00 Dragons’ Den: Pitches to Riches (R,S,HD). Richard Osman presents a look back at some of the most memorable contestants to feature on the show.

7.00 The Voice UK (S,HD). The second night of the Battles phase, in which the singers have to impress coaches Tom Jones, Will.i.am, Gavin Rossdale and Jennifer Hudson.

▼

8.00 Call the Midwife (S,HD). 6/8. See Choices Above.

8.00 Dragons’ Den (S,HD). 16/16. See Choices Above.

8.00 Rivers with Jeremy Paxman (S,HD). 1/4. See Choices Above.

8.15 The EFL Cup Final Highlights: Football on 5 (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 SS-GB (S,HD). 2/5. See Choices Above.

9.00 Special Forces – Ultimate Hell Week (S,HD). 5/6. The remaining recruits arrive in France to receive training with an elite tactical unit of the French police, where they face psychological and strategic challenges.

9.00 Homeland (S). 5/12. Keane is left on the sidelines, while Carrie’s work starts to impact on her home life.

9.00 Olympus Has Fallen (S,HD) (2013). A disgraced secret service agent tries to redeem himself when terrorists take control of the White House. Action thriller, starring Gerard Butler, Aaron Eckhart and Morgan Freeman. Includes 5 News Update at 10pm. ●●

9.00 The Good Karma Hospital (S,HD). 4/6. See Choices Above.

▼

Special Forces – Ultimate … 9pm

6.00 The Big Painting Challenge (S,HD). 3/6. The contestants visit Whipsnade Zoo to paint the animals.

10.00 BBC News (S,HD). 10.20 Regional News (S). 10.30 Have I Got a Bit More Old News for You (R,S,HD). 1/9. Extended edition. Stephen Mangan hosts, with Suzanne Evans and Henning Wehn.

10.00 Life of Crime (S) (2013). See Choices Above. ●●●

10.00 ITV News and Weather (S); Weather. 10.20 Peston on Sunday (R,S,HD). Political magazine, presented by Robert Peston, with ITV News National Editor Allegra Stratton.

10.00 Gogglebox (R,S,HD). The amateur critics share their opinions on what they have been watching during the week as the popular series returns for its ninth run.

▼

6 7 8 9

The Big Painting Challenge, 6pm

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

11.15 American High School (S,HD). 3/6. One of the school’s few white students throws a birthday party.

11.35 Women’s Six Nations Highlights (S,HD). Action from the third round of fixtures.

11.20 Premiership Rugby Union (S,HD). Action from the 16th round of fixtures.

11.00 Clear and Present Danger (S,HD) (1994). Action thriller, starring Harrison Ford. ●●●

11.15 The Terminator (S,HD) (1984). See Choices Above. ●●●●●

▼

EPW-E01-S1

SUNDAY

12.00 The Celebrity Apprentice USA (S,HD). The contestants promote South African tourism. 1.20 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 1.25 BBC News (S,HD).

12.05 Film: Badlands (S) (1973). Crime drama, starring Martin Sheen and Sissy Spacek. ●●●●● 1.35 Sign Zone: Question Time (R,S). Topical debate from Stoke-on-Trent. 2.35 Sign Zone: Holby City (R,S). Isaac’s relationship with Dominic reaches breaking point. 3.30 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.20 Phillip Schofield’s South African Adventure (R,S,HD). 12.45 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 Chopping Block (R,S,HD). The couples debone and skin a chicken. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Textbased information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

1.30 The Last Leg (R,S,HD). A comic review of the past seven days. 2.30 Hoarder SOS (R,S,HD). Experts persuade a Cambridgeshire woman to part with piles of perfume bottles. 3.25 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). 4.20 Kirstie’s Handmade Treasures (R,S,HD). 4.40 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.10 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

1.15 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh (R,S,HD). Alan visits Attingham Hall in Shropshire. 4.00 Witches: A Century of Murder (R,S,HD). 4.50 House Doctor (R,S). 5.15 Nick’s Quest (R,S). 5.40 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.50 Roary the Racing Car (R,S).

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

ITV2

6.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.35 The Voice UK (R,S,HD). 10.35 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 1.00 2Awesome 2.50 The Hot Desk: Jonas Blue (R,S,HD). 3.05 Film: The Smurfs 2 (S,HD) (2013). ●● 4.05 FYI Daily (HD). 4.10 Film: The Smurfs 2 (S,HD) (2013). Concluded. ●● 5.10 Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway (R,S,HD).

6.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 6.20 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 7.05 Melissa & Joey (R,S,HD). 8.00 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 10.30 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs – Final Week (R,S,HD). 12.05 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs: Final Week (R,S,HD). 1.15 The Jump (R,S,HD). 2.55 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD). 4.25 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD).

Sky1

6.00 Hour of Power (R,HD). 7.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 7.30 Futurama (R,S). 9.00 Supergirl (R,S,HD). 10.00 Rugby’s Funniest Moments (R,S,HD). 11.00 WWE Raw Hlts (R,S,HD). 12.00 Futurama (R,S). 2.00 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5.30 The Big Spell (S,HD). The grand final of the competition. Last in the series.

FILM PICKS

Manchester United v Southampton. Lynsey Hipgrave and George Riley present action from the showpiece match, as Jose Mourinho’s Red Devils met Claude Puel’s Saints at Wembley Stadium. United last made the final in 2010.

A medical case becomes personal for Ram as he prepares to attend a wedding, while Ruby treats a patient from the UK whose story does not add up.

THE TERMINATOR 11.15pm, Channel 5

A cyborg is sent back in time to kill a woman whose unborn son is destined to save the human race. Sci-fi thriller, with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

GOLD

7.00 Cheers (S). 7.50 One Foot in the Grave (S). Margaret collapses with exhaustion. 8.30 To the Manor Born (S). 11.10 Only Fools and Horses (S). 12.35 Only Fools and Horses (S). 2.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 3,50 Only Fools and Horses (S). The Trotters become caped crusaders. 5.05 Only Fools and Horses (S). The brothers’ finances hit an all-time low.

Ibiza Weekender, 9pm

Marvel’s Agents of ... 9pm

The Big Spell, 5.30pm

Only Fools and Horses, 6.25pm

6.45 Kindergarten Cop (S,HD) (1990). Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. ●●●

6.25 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24. 6.55 Men in Black 3 (S,HD) (2012). Sci-fi comedy, with Will Smith. ●●●

6.30 The Simpsons (S,HD). Krusty and his daughter spend Christmas with the Simpsons.

6.25 Only Fools and Horses (S). 3/3. The Trotters finally strike gold.

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5/13. Bart takes a crash course in self-defence. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 3/13. Homer contemplates suicide.

7.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). The brothers jet off to Monte Carlo five years after achieving their dream of becoming millionaires.

7.45 FYI Daily (HD). 7.50 Kindergarten Cop (S,HD) (1990). Concluded. ●●●

Sky Sports 1

6.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 10.00 The Sunday Supplement (HD). Reviewing the latest football stories. 11.00 Goals on Sunday (HD). A review of Saturday’s football action. 1.00 Live Nissan Super Sunday (HD). Tottenham Hotspur v Stoke City (Kick-off 1.30pm). 3.45 Live EFL Cup Final (HD). Manchester United v Southampton (Kick-off 4.30pm).

Live EFL Cup Final, 3.45pm

7.00 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD). 7.30 Live La Liga Football (HD). Villarreal v Real Madrid (Kick-off 7.45pm).

10.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 8/20. Joe is injured during a bull run. 10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 15/22. Peter decides to become a member of the paparazzi.

9.00 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (S). Coulson plots a break-in at a high-security prison to discover the secret that is haunting his team, while Robbie fights to keep the Ghost Rider under control.

RADIO

12.15 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 1.15 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.20 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 3.10 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (R,S). 3.55 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). Omnibus. Problems arise between Ste and Harry.

Radio 1 6.00am Dev. 10.00 The Matt Edmondson Show. 1.00pm Alice Levine. 4.00 Cel Spellman. 6.00 Radio 1’s Most Played. 7.00 Rock Show with Daniel P Carter. 10.00 Phil Taggart. 1.00am Monki. 4.00 Adele Roberts. Radio 2 5.00am Radio 2 Playlist: Easy. 6.00 The Sunday Hour. 7.00 Good Morning Sunday with Jason Mohammad. 9.00 Steve Wright’s Sunday Love Songs. 11.00 The Michael Ball Show. 1.00pm Elaine Paige on Sunday. 3.00 Johnnie Walker’s Sounds of the 70s. 5.00 Paul O’Grady. 7.00 Claudia on Sunday. 9.00 Clare Teal. 11.00 Don Black. Midnight Sounds of the 60s. 2.00 Radio 2’s Blues Playlist.

10.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). Tottenham Hotspur v Stoke City. 10.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). Manchester United v Southampton. Action from the showpiece match at Wembley Stadium.

11.00 MacGyver (R,S,HD). 3/22. The team heads to Malaysia to extract a terrorist group’s financier.

11.00 The Thick of It (S). 3/7. 11.30 Goals on Sunday (HD). Peter reluctantly attends A review of Saturday’s a weekend seminar with football action. Stewart. 11.40 The Thick of It (S). 4/7.

12.00 The Force: Essex (R,HD). 1.00 Air Ambulance ER (R,S,HD). 2.00 Arrow (R,S,HD). 2.50 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 4.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 4.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 5.15 Road Wars (R,S,HD).

12.20 Limmy’s Show. Dee Dee is astounded by the wonders of Teletext. 1.00 Limmy’s Show. 1.40 House of Fools (S). 2.20 House of Fools (S). 2.50 jam. 3.15 French and Saunders (S). Jerry Hall guest stars. 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

3.00 Radio 2 Playlists: Pop Ballads. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Upbeat. Radio 3 7.00am Breakfast. 9.00 News. 9.03 Sunday Morning with James Jolly. Noon Private Passions. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 The Early Music Show. 3.00 Choral Evensong. 4.00 The Choir. 5.00 The Listening Service. 5.30 Words and Music. 6.45 Sunday Feature: John Ruskin’s Eurythmic Girls. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 9.00 Drama on 3: Oedipus the King. 10.45 Early Music Late. 11.45 From the New World. 12.30am Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Bells on Sunday. 5.45 Profile. 6.00

News Headlines. 6.05 Something Understood. 6.35 On Your Farm: A Journey Through the British Isles and Beyond. 6.57 Weather. 7.00 News. 7.00 Sunday Papers. 7.10 Sunday. 7.55 Radio 4 Appeal. 7.57 Weather. 8.00 News. 8.00 Sunday Papers. 8.10 Sunday Worship. 8.48 A Point of View. 8.58 Tweet of the Day. 9.00 Broadcasting House. 10.00 The Archers. 11.15 Desert Island Discs. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Just a Minute. 12.30 The Food Programme. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World This Weekend. 1.30 Fry’s English Delight. 2.00 Gardeners’ Question Time. 2.45 The Listening Project. 3.00

Film4

BBC4

11.00 The Colditz Story (HD) (1954). ●●●●● 1.00 Percy Jackson & the Lightning Thief (HD) (2010). ●●● 3.15 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (HD) (2011). ●● 4.55 12 Angry Men (HD) (1957). ●●●●●

6.50 The Three Musketeers (HD) (2011). ●●● 9.00 GI Joe: Retaliation (HD) (2013). An elite military team battles a terrorist organisation that has replaced the US president with an imposter. Action adventure sequel, with Dwayne Johnson and Bruce Willis. ●● 11.10 Killing Them Softly (HD) (2012). A Mob hitman is sent to kill two petty crooks, but jeopardises the job. Crime thriller, starring Brad Pitt and Ray Liotta. ●●●

7.00 Sound of Song (R,HD). Neil Brand recreates famous recording sessions. 8.00 South Downs: England’s Mountains Green (R,HD). Exploring the UK’s newest National Park – the South Downs. 9.00 Two Days, One Night (HD) (2014). Premiere. Drama, starring Marion Cotillard. ●●●● 10.30 Hockney (HD) (2014). Documentary exploring the career of acclaimed artist David Hockney. The film incorporates previously unseen home movies and photographs. ●●● 12.15 Treasures of the Louvre (R,HD). 1.45 Order and Disorder with Jim Al-Khalili (R,HD). 2.45 South Downs: England’s Mountains Green (R,HD).

9.10 Not Going Out (S). 4/6. Lee agrees to give Kate driving lessons. 9.50 Not Going Out (S). 5/6. Kate and Lee take in a lodger.

10.25 Not Going Out (S). 6/6. 10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 10.00 Red (S,HD) (2010). Lee gets a job. (HD). 9/24. Callen’s A retired CIA agent father Garrison is found survives an assassination in the hospital room of attempt, and reunites an NCIS patient during a his old hit squad to find radiation poisoning out who wants them case, and Callen must dead. Action thriller, take him to the starring Bruce Willis and boatshed for Morgan Freeman. ●●● interrogation.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 9/22. Peter runs his father-in-law’s company. 11.30 American Dad! (R,S). 6/7. S 11.55 American Dad! (R,S). 7/7. 12.30 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). 12.55 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). Cleveland takes a struggling rapper under his wing. 1.25 Ibiza Weekender (R,S,HD). David finds out what happened while he was off sick. 2.15 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 5.45 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).

9.00 Hawaii Five-0 (HD). 9/25. The team investigates the murder of a conspiracy theorist who apparently had compelling evidence that John F Kennedy’s cabinet ordered his assassination.

Two criminals kidnap the wife of a corrupt tycoon, only to discover he is not willing to pay their ransom demand. Comedy, with Jennifer Aniston and Mos Def.

1.00 The Running Man (HD) (1987). ●●●

8.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 7/22. Principal Skinner introduces a unique incentive to make pupils behave. 8.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 3/22. 9.00 Ibiza Weekender (S,HD). David finds out what happened while he was off sick, Imogen decides to tell her boyfriend that she kissed another man, and Jordan and Laura create tension for their friends.

SUNDAY

LIFE OF CRIME 10pm, BBC2

News. 3.02 Drama: Ann Veronica. 4.00 Open Book. 4.30 Poetry Please. 5.00 File on 4. 5.40 Profile. 5.54 Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.15 Pick of the Week. 7.00 The Archers. 7.15 Guilt Trip. 7.45 Bottle Man. 8.00 Feedback. 8.30 Last Word. 9.00 Money Box. 9.26 Radio 4 Appeal. 9.30 Analysis. 10.00 The Westminster Hour. With Carolyn Quinn 11.00 The Film Programme. 11.30 Something Understood. Midnight News and Weather. 12.15 Thinking Allowed. 12.45 Bells on Sunday. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast. Radio 5 Live 5.00am 5 Live Science.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

12.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 1.00 EFL Cup Final (HD). Manchester United v Southampton. 2.00 Goals on Sunday (HD). 3.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 3.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). 4.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 5.00 EFL Cup Final (HD). 6.00 Sunday Breakfast. 9.00 SportsWeek. 10.00 Pienaar’s Politics. 11.00 5 Live Investigates. Noon 5 Live Sport. 12.15 MOTD2 Extra. 1.00 5 Live Sport. 1.30 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2016-17. 3.30 5 Live Sport. 4.30 5 Live Sport: EFL Cup Football 2016-17. 6.30 6-0-6. 8.30 Oscars 2017 Preview. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. 1.00am Up All Night. Classic FM 7.00am Aled Jones. 10.00 Bill Turnbull. 1.00pm Alexander Armstrong. 3.00 Charlotte Green. 5.00 The Classic FM Chart. 7.00 David Mellor. 9.00 Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Classical Music. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

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EPW-E01-S1

THE EFL CUP FINAL HIGHLIGHTS: FOOTBALL ON 5 8.15pm, Channel 5

THE GOOD KARMA HOSPITAL 9pm, ITV

BROADCHURCH 9pm, ITV

TV PICKS

DI Alec Hardy and DS Ellie Miller are called in to investigate a serious sexual assault. The return of the crime drama, starring David Tennant and Olivia Colman.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD). 11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD). 2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

THE 2,000,000 CALORIE BUFFET 10pm, Channel 4

The concept of an all-you-can-eat buffet is thought to have originated in Las Vegas, but they are now a growing phenomenon on this side of the Atlantic too, but who benefits from such an approach – the customers or the restaurants desperate to pull in the punters? We’re about to find out courtesy of this documentary.

BBC2

6.30 Wanted Down Under Revisited (R,S). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: The Great Interior Design Challenge (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Women’s Six Nations Highlights (R,S,HD). 1.30 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 2.00 Landward (S,HD). 2.30 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 3.30 Africa (R,S,HD). 4.25 A Place to Call Home (S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

MEET THE LORDS 9pm, BBC2

New series. Documentary filmed ove`r a year following life at the House of Lords, one of Britain’s oldest, most idiosyncratic and most important institutions, going behind-the-scenes.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD). 12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). With Jeremy Kyle. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 The Home Game (S). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard. 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

THE NIGHTLY SHOW WITH DAVID WALLIAMS 10pm, ITV

New series. Entertainment show featuring a mix of topical monologues, studio games, celebrity guests, stand-up and video clips that will be presented by a rotating panel of hosts, who each sit in the hot seat for a week. David Walliams is the inaugural host.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S). 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD). 12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD). 1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (R,S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (R,S,HD). 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS (R,S,HD). 3.15 Film: A Father’s Denial (S,HD) (2016). Premiere. Drama, starring Brady Smith. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD). Dee fears that she has pushed Toadie away.

A Place to Call Home, 4.25pm

The Kyle Files, 8pm

Inside Britain’s Airports, 8pm

Ice Road Chaos: Winter … 8pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD). 6.30 Regional News (S).

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 2/22. Halloween-inspired stories. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). The grieving Nightingales prepare for a funeral.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD). Billie’s web of lies begins to unravel. 6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD). Presented by Matt Baker and Michelle Ackerley. 7.30 Regional Programme (S). Followed by Regional News.

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). Quiz show, hosted by Jeremy Vine. 6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 6/10. Part two of two. Michael Portillo goes on a high-speed boat trip. 7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD). 1/10. Anita Manning and Raj Bisra compete in the challenge set out on a road trip to seek out bargains, travelling through East Anglia.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Laurel seeks solace in Marlon’s arms. 7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Anna tells Sally that Rosie is a drugs mule.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 The Cars That Made Britain Great (R,S,HD). Jodie Kidd extols the virtues of the Jaguar E-Type, which she believes has lost none of its appeal. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

8.00 EastEnders (S,HD). Keegan tells Shakil he is going to get revenge on Bex for her recent actions. 8.30 Life in Immigration Town – Panorama (S,HD). The impact of migrants on Slough, Berkshire.

8.00 University Challenge (S,HD). 31/37. The quarter-final matches continue. 8.30 Mary Berry Everyday (S,HD). See Choices Above.

8.00 The Kyle Files (S,HD). 1/6. New series. Jeremy Kyle returns to tackle more high-profile issues, beginning with obesity. 8.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Sally is shocked when Rosie admits her career is in tatters.

8.00 Inside Britain’s Airports: Channel 4 Dispatches (S,HD). Harry Wallop investigates how airports make money from passengers. 8.30 Food Unwrapped (S,HD). Matt Tebbutt learns why slicing onions makes people cry.

8.00 Ice Road Chaos: Winter Road Rescue (S,HD). Traffic officers rush to a serious incident in which a car hangs precariously above a motorway, and a recovery specialist deals with a car abandoned by its driver. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

9.00 Catching the Abusers: A Crimewatch Special (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 Meet the Lords (S,HD). 1/3. New series. Documentary following life at the House of Lords, going behind-the-scenes during a turbulent year that has seen dramatic changes in the political landscape.

9.00 Broadchurch (S,HD). 1/8. See Choices Above.

9.00 999: What’s Your Emergency? (S,HD). A look at the challenges facing Cheshire’s police custody teams. Officers deal with a homeless ex-serviceman arrested following a complaint about his behaviour in a cinema.

9.00 The Railways That Built Britain with Chris Tarrant (S,HD). 3/3. Chris examines the devastating impact of the Beeching report and reveals how a sleek new locomotive not only saved the railway network, but reshaped the country. Last in the series.

▼

6 7 8 9

Match of the Day 2, 10.45pm

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD). 10.30 Regional News (S). 10.45 Match of the Day 2 (S,HD). Mark Chapman presents highlights of the latest Premier League action.

10.00 Cradle to Grave (R,S,HD). 3/8. The world is changing for Spud as the docks face closure. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 1/40. See Choices Above. 10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 The 2,000,000 Calorie Buffet (S,HD). See Choices Above.

10.00 From Paris with Love (S,HD) (2010). See Choices Above. ●●●

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

11.30 Regional Programme (R,S,HD).

11.10 Weather (S,HD). 11.15 The Secrets of Your Food (R,S,HD). 1/3. The physics, chemistry and biology hidden inside various foods.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.15 The Cube (R,S,HD). 4/6. Game show, hosted by Phillip Schofield.

11.00 Britain’s Benefit Tenants (R,S,HD). 2/3. A letting agent becomes caught between a single mother and her landlord.

11.50 War (S,HD) (2007). Martial arts thriller, starring Jet Li and Jason Statham. ●●

▼

EPW-E01-S1

MONDAY

12.20 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.25 BBC News (S,HD).

12.15 Incredible Medicine: Dr Weston’s Casebook (R,S,HD). Surgeon Gabriel Weston uncovers the workings of the human body. 1.15 Sign Zone: Countryfile (R,S). 2.10 Sign Zone: Who Do You Think You Are? (R,S). 3.10 Sign Zone: Royal Recipes (R,S). 3.55 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). 12.40 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.05 Has Political Correctness Gone Mad? (R,S,HD). Writer and broadcaster Trevor Phillips argues against liberalism. 1.00 Walking the Nile (R,S,HD). 1.55 Escape to the Wild (R,S,HD). 2.50 Lagos to London: Britain’s New Super-Rich (R,S,HD). 3.45 Building the Dream (S,HD). 4.40 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.05 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD).

1.30 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 The Week We Went Wild (S,HD). A woman hopes five days in the jungle will teach her son a few life lessons. 4.00 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.20 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). A man with tattoos of all of his ex-girlfriends. 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

10 11 after

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

ITV2 6.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.30 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD). 11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 12.55 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

Jeremy Vine and Tina Daheley present an edition focusing on tackling child abuse, featuring a report on Operation Hydrant – the national police operation tasked with bringing perpetrators to justice. Specialist detectives reveal how they investigate these cases.

Sky1

6.10 Made in Chelsea: South of France (R,S,HD). 7.00 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

New series. The food writer and former Great British Bake Off judge celebrates the everyday food and ingredients she has always loved, from hearty and wholesome ideas to dishes that are a little bit more indulgent.

CATCHING THE ABUSERS: A CRIMEWATCH SPECIAL 9pm, BBC1

AS ABOVE, SO BELOW 9pm, Film4

Premiere. Archaeologists fall victim to strange forces preying on their dark secrets. Horror, with Perdita Weeks and Ben Feldman.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S,HD). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). The Trotters finally strike gold. 12.40 My Family (S). Janey’s baby is due. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 4.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

Sky Sports 1 9.00 Premier League Years (S,HD). 11.00 Football’s Greatest Teams (S,HD). 11.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). 12.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 1.00 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD). 1.30 Football’s Greatest Teams (S,HD). 2.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 2.30 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD). 3.00 EFL Cup Final (HD). 4.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 4.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). 5.30 Premier League Highlights (HD).

The Great Indoors, 9.30pm

Mission: Impossible, 8pm

The Blacklist, 10.45pm

Gavin & Stacey, 8pm

Live Football, 7pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 15/23. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 16/23.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 13/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 5/16. Fry helps Zoidberg. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 4/13. Homer pawns the TV.

6.00 My Family (S). 6/13. Janey’s baby is due. 6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 7/10.

6.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (S,HD). Highlights of Saturday’s show. 6.30 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD).

7.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 17/23. Featuring bad manners and baby animals. 7.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 18/23.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Neeta is thrown when Grace calls and asks her to bring Curtis to her. 7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD). New series.

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 2/13. Bart is hailed as a child genius. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 6/13. A musician befriends Lisa.

7.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 8/10. Daddy loses control while dressed as a spaceman.

7.00 Live Monday Night Football (HD). Leicester City v Liverpool (Kick-off 8.00pm). Coverage of the Premier League encounter.

8.00 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 21/24. Zoey and her daughter move in with Walden. 8.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 22/24. Alan is visited by Charlie’s ghost.

8.00 Mission: Impossible (S,HD) (1996). A secret agent is accused of betraying his fellow spies. Action thriller based on the 1960s TV series, with Tom Cruise and Jon Voight. ●●●●

8.00 Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (HD) (2002). Sci-fi prequel, with Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen. ●●●

8.00 Gavin & Stacey (S). 4/6. The Shipmans drive to Wales for the wedding fayre. 8.40 Gavin & Stacey (S). 5/6. Gavin embarks on two stag nights.

9.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 16/22. Lois encourages Brian to submit a script for a TV pilot. 9.30 The Great Indoors (S,HD). 8/19. The HR department rejects a ban on inter-office dating. 10.00 American Dad! (R,S). 5/16. Part one of two. Stan is sent to Saudi Arabia. 10.30 American Dad! (R,S). 6/16. Part two of two. Stan settles into Saudi Arabian life.

An aide at the American embassy in Paris assists an agent’s mission to stop a terrorist. Action thriller, starring John Travolta.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 Hell Below Zero (1954). ●●● 12.50 The Great Sioux Uprising (1953). ●● 2.30 The Tall T (HD) (1957). ●●●● 4.10 Stagecoach (HD) (1966). ●●

6.35 Hugo (HD) (2011). An orphan living in the walls of a railway station in 1930s Paris uncovers a lonely shopkeeper’s mysterious past. Family adventure, starring Asa Butterfield and Chloe Grace Moretz. ●●●●● 9.00 As Above, So Below (HD) (2014). See Choices Above. ●●● 10.50 Easy A (HD) (2010). A teenage girl lies about her non-existent sexual history. Teen comedy, starring Emma Stone and Penn Badgley. ●●●●

12.40 The Last Exorcism Part II (HD) (2013). ●● 2.25 Of Horses and Men (HD) (2013). ●●●●

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather. 7.30 Reel History of Britain (R). 8.00 The Big Painting Challenge (R,HD). The contestants visit Whipsnade Zoo. 9.00 Britain’s Pompeii: A Village Lost in Time (R,HD). Cameras follow the team excavating a 3,000 year-old Bronze Age village. 10.00 Dan Cruickshank and the Family That Built Gothic Britain (R,HD). The changing fortunes of the Scott family of architects. 11.00 Born Too White (R,HD). 12.00 Oceans (R,HD). 1.00 Art of China (R,HD). 2.00 Timeshift: The People’s Liners – Britain’s Lost Pleasure Fleets (R,HD). 3.00 Dan Cruickshank and the Family That Built Gothic Britain (R,HD).

9.20 The Royle Family (S). 3/6. The family argues over a television programme.

10.00 Celebs Go Dating (S,HD). 11/20. Agents Nadia and Eden host a speed-dating event to introduce civilian singletons to their celebrity clients, with Ferne McCann being swept off her feet by model Will.

10.45 The Blacklist (R,HD). 11/22. Red gets wind that the US Witness Protection list is under threat from an elite organisation of female thieves, so he encourages Liz to go undercover in the gang to save it.

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10.00 The Royle Family (S). 5/6. Barbara walks out on Jim. 10.40 The Royle Family (S). 6/6. The Royles celebrate Antony’s 18th birthday.

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11.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD). 11.30 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD).

12.25 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). 12.55 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). 1.25 The Great Indoors (R,S,HD). 1.50 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 2.15 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 5.45 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).

12.00 Monday Night Football: PreMatch (HD). 1.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 1.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD). 2.00 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 2.15 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (S,HD). 2.45 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 3.00 Monday Night Football: Pre-Match (HD).

12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.05 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 3.05 First Dates Abroad (R,S). 3.55 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.20 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.40 Charmed (R,S).

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 Radio 1’s Specialist Chart with Phil Taggart. 10.02 Huw Stephens. 1.00am Friction. 4.00 Adele Roberts. Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Paddy O’Connell. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Paul Jones. 8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 Johnnie Walker’s Long-Players. 11.00 David Rodigan. Midnight Johnnie Walker’s Sounds of the 70s. 2.00 Radio

12.45 Most Daring (R). 1.45 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 2.45 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 3.45 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.10 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.35 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

2’s Jazz Playlist. 3.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Great British Songbook. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Hidden Treasures. Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Music Matters. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. 11.00 Jazz Now. 12.30am Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today. 5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today. 9.00 Start the Week. 9.45 (LW) Daily

12.00 Peep Show (S). 12.35 Peep Show (S). 1.10 The Royle Family (S). 1.45 The Royle Family (S). 2.20 Shooting Stars (S). 2.50 Shooting Stars (S). 3.20 The Royle Family (S). The Royles celebrate Antony’s 18th birthday. 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 Is One Career Enough? 11.30 Chain Reaction. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: The Wells Way. 3.00 Brain of Britain. 3.30 The Food Programme. 4.00 Writing a New Caribbean. 4.30 Beyond Belief. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 Just a Minute. 7.00 The Archers. 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 A Small Town

Murder. 8.00 The Philosopher’s Arms. A discussion on what makes swearing offensive. Last in the series 8.30 Analysis. Part two of two. 9.00 The Rise of the Robots. Adam Rutherford investigates whether humans are ready to live alongside artificial intelligence. Last in the series 9.30 Start the Week. 9.59 Weather. 10.00 The World Tonight. With Ritula Shah 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. 11.00 Word of Mouth. 11.30 Today in Parliament. Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

WE’LL BUYYOURR HOUSE FORCASH!

11.05 First Dates Abroad (S). 11.45 The Force: Manchester 11.20 Gimme Gimme 11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). Gimme (S). 7/7. Linda Including a 32-year-old (R,S,HD). 9/10. 19/22. and Tom land new jobs. dancer who wants to Documentary following 11.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). settle down. the work of Greater 22/22. Manchester Police. 11.55 American Dad! (R,S). 1/16. Hayley finds a new man.

RADIO

MONDAY

FROM PARIS WITH LOVE 10pm, Channel 5

Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Adrian Chiles. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport: The Monday Night Club. 8.00 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2016-17. Leicester City v Liverpool (Kickoff 8.00pm). 10.00 Flintoff, Savage and the Ping Pong Guy. 10.30 Phil Williams. 1.00am Up All Night. Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven. 8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

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EPW-E01-S1

MARY BERRY EVERYDAY 8.30pm, BBC2

THE REPLACEMENT 9pm, BBC1

TV PICKS

A woman gets pregnant after landing a big contract for her firm of architects, but her stand-in soon starts to threaten her position. Drama, with Morven Christie.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD). 11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD). 2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

THE SECRET CHEF 8pm, ITV

If you think you’re a great cook, you can always go on MasterChef. But if you struggle to even boil an egg, Secret Chef may be the show for you. Mel Giedroyc narrates the new series in which someone with minimal culinary skills is given five weeks to learn how to make a show-stopping, restaurant quality meal.

BBC2

6.00 The World’s Most Photographed (R,S). 6.30 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: The World’s Most Extraordinary Homes (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 The Super League Show (S). 1.50 Countryfile (R,S,HD). 2.00 Building Dream Homes (R,S,HD). 2.30 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 3.25 Africa (R,S,HD). 4.25 A Place to Call Home (S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

1066: A YEAR TO CONQUER ENGLAND 9pm, BBC2

PLAY TO THE WHISTLE 9pm, ITV

Docudrama in which Dan Snow explores the political intrigues and family betrayals between Vikings, Anglo-Saxons and Normans that led to the Battle of Hastings.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD). 12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). Topical debate from a female perspective. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 The Home Game (S,HD). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

New series. Host Holly Willoughby and team captains Frank Lampard and Bradley Walsh are joined by Chelsea and England footballer John Terry, Paralympic gold medallist Jonnie Peacock and Countdown star Rachel Riley. Comedians Romesh Ranganathan and Seann Walsh are on hand too.

Channel 4

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (R,S,HD). 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 3.15 Film: Dear Diary, I Died (S,HD) (2016). Premiere. Thriller, starring Katherine Kelly Lang. ●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Rakesh is kidnapped by an assailant. 7.30 Britain’s Busiest Motorway (S,HD). 2/6. Traffic officers are sent to deal with a 90-ton crane which has exploded.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Ice Road Chaos: Winter Road Rescue (R,S,HD). Traffic officers rush to a serious incident in which a car hangs precariously above a motorway. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD). Raffy finds it difficult to write her father’s eulogy. 6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

Secrets of the National … 9pm

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 3/22. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Neeta is confused when Grace calls and asks her to bring Curtis to her.

▼

This Is Us, 10.35pm

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

8.00 Holby City (S,HD). 21/52. Raf enthusiastically makes plans for the future with Kim and the twins he is to be a father of. However, his hopes and dreams look set to be dashed by a series of revelations.

8.00 Further Back in Time for Dinner (S,HD). 6/6. The Robshaw family reflect on their time travels, discovering that much of what they experienced in the past, still lives on around our dinner tables today. Last in the series.

8.00 The Secret Chef (S,HD). 1/4. See Choices Above.

8.00 The Secret Life of the Zoo (S,HD). New series. Cameras follow animals at Chester Zoo, including Pedro the giant anteater, who is about to be reunited with his long-term partner, Bliss.

8.00 Inside Windsor Castle (S,HD). A look back at events that shaped the monarchy between 1952 and 1972, as Prince Philip grew restless and the Queen Mother reportedly ran up debts of £7million. Followed by 5 News Update.

9.00 The Replacement (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 1066: A Year to Conquer England (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 Play to the Whistle (S,HD). 1/6. See Choices Above.

9.00 24 Hours in A&E (S,HD). Staff and patients at St George’s talk about the importance of family support, and those in need of help include a 51-year-old decorator who has fallen from a ladder.

9.00 Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh (S,HD). 4/6. The presenter visits an 18th-century cotton mill in Cheshire, one of the world’s first factories, uncovering the stories of the child workers of the Industrial Revolution.

10.00 Inside No 9 (S,HD). 3/6. A woman and a professor commence a battle of wits to solve a puzzle. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 2/40. Entertainment show. 10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 Catastrophe (S,HD). 1/6. See Choices Above. 10.35 This Is Us (S,HD). 13/18. Jack and Rebecca agree to throw Kate, Kevin and Randall three birthday parties.

10.00 Shannon Matthews: What Happened Next (S,HD). See Choices Above.

11.10 Weather (S,HD). 11.15 Special Forces – Ultimate Hell Week (R,S,HD). 5/6. The remaining recruits are trained for an elite tactical unit of the French police.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.15 Unbelievable Moments Caught on Camera (R,S,HD). 2/2. Wakeboarders have a memorable encounter with dolphins.

11.30 Gogglebox (R,S,HD). The households’ opinions on recent TV.

11.05 Ian Brady: 50 Years Behind Bars (R,S,HD). Documentary examining the killer’s 50 years in prison.

12.15 Sign Zone: Our Dancing Town (R,S). Dance troupes from Barnsley, Skipton and Huddersfield take part. 1.15 Sign Zone: The Big Painting Challenge (R,S). The contestants put their still life talents to the test. 2.15 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). Entertainment show. 12.40 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 Loose Women (R,HD). Topical debate from a female perspective. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.35 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S). 1.25 KOTV Boxing Weekly (S,HD). 1.55 Gillette World Sport (S). 2.25 Mobil 1 The Grid (R,S,HD). 2.50 0 to 60mph: Britain’s Fastest Kids (R,S,HD). 3.50 Kirstie’s Fill Your House for Free (R,S,HD). 4.10 Building the Dream (S,HD). 5.05 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD).

12.05 When Kids Kill: Catfish Killer (S,HD). The case of teenage karate instructor Tony Bushby. 1.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 4.00 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.20 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD). 10.30 Regional News (S). Followed by Regional Programme. 10.45 Imagine – Maya Angelou: And Still I Rise (S,HD). A portrait of the trail-blazing activist, poet and writer, who was captured on film just before she died in 2014.

▼

after

Emmerdale, 7pm

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). 52/85. Quiz show, hosted by Jeremy Vine. 6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 7/10. Part one of two. Michael Portillo travels from Athens’ port of Piraeus. 7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD). 2/10. Anita Manning breaks from shopping to visit a former silk mill with a royal connection.

7.00 The One Show (S,HD). 7.30 EastEnders (S,HD). Jane puts her foot down and calls the doctor for an appointment for Ian. Followed by Regional News.

10 11

Inside No 9, 10pm

▼

6 7 8 9

Imagine – Maya Angelou, 10.45pm 6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD). 6.30 Regional News (S).

▼

EPW-E01-S1

TUESDAY

12.20 Who Do You Think You Are? (R,S,HD). Sunetra Sarker sets out to explore her Bengali heritage. 1.20 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 1.25 BBC News (S,HD).

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

New series. Return of the comedy written by and starring Sharon Horgan and Rob Delaney. Rob has an unexplained receipt for the morning after pill and a lot of questions for Sharon.

The disappearance of Shannon Matthews was a story that gripped and then appalled Britain. Nine years on, this documentary examines her kidnapping and why people close to the case believe the police should reopen their investigation.

Sky1

6.10 Made in Chelsea: South of France (R,S,HD). 7.00 Game of Clones (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

Super-powered outsiders Rogue and Wolverine find themselves at a school for mutants which is run by a benevolent psychic professor. While there, they agree to join others with similar gifts to take on a superhuman mutant terrorist faction intent on establishing dominance over mankind. Sci-fi comic-book adventure, starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Anna Paquin and Halle Berry.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 7.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

TUESDAY

X-MEN 9pm, Film4

FILM PICK

SHANNON MATTHEWS: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT 10pm, Channel 5

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 My Family (S). Susan embraces the spirit of Halloween. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S). Foggy organises a trip to the seaside.

Sky Sports 1 6.00 Football Gold (S). 7.00 WWE Smackdown Hlts (HD). 8.00 Monday Night Football: Pre-Match (HD). 9.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 9.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (S,HD). 10.00 Premier League Legends (HD). 11.00 Football Gold (S). 12.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 4.00 Monday Night Football: Pre-Match (HD). 5.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 5.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD).

Hell’s Kitchen USA, 9pm

Tattoo Fixers, 9pm

The Flash, 9pm

Fawlty Towers, 10pm

Live EFL, 7.30pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 19/23. Camcorder clips. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 20/23.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 15/24. Howard receives shocking news.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 7/16. Bender’s duplicate joins an important mission. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 7/13.

6.00 My Family (S). 8/13. Susan embraces the spirit of Halloween. 6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 9/10.

6.00 Premier League Review (HD). A look back at recent fixtures in the Premier League.

7.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold Strikes Back! (R,S). Comedy compilation of Harry Hill’s most off-the-wall observations.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Peri is dreading her first day back at school after Cameron’s arrest. 7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD).

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 8/13. Bart’s efforts to impress his friends backfire. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 9/13.

7.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 10/10. Hyacinth’s picnic plans backfire.

7.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part Two (HD). 7.30 Live EFL (HD). Brighton & Hove Albion v Newcastle United.

8.00 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 23/24. Zoey remains sceptical about Alan’s recent health scare. 8.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 24/24. Jake makes a decision.

8.00 The Goldbergs (S). 12/24. Adam and Barry learn something new about Murray. 8.30 Black-ish (S,HD). 1/24. New series. Dre takes his family to a theme park.

8.00 Supergirl (S,HD). 13/22. National City comes under threat when Kara shuns a new arrival’s affections, while a disagreement further strains her relationship with Mon-El.

8.00 Only Fools and Horses (S). 5/7. Del gets a nasty surprise. 8.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). 6/7. Rodney becomes a wanted man.

9.00 Hell’s Kitchen USA (S,HD). 6/16. The contestants take part in an ingredient crossword challenge, and in another challenge, kidfriendly items must be incorporated into the dinner service during a family night.

9.00 Tattoo Fixers (S,HD). The team meets Nicole, whose hashtagged art is raising some difficult questions, and Kiel, whose drunken holiday giraffe did not turn out as planned.

9.00 The Flash (S,HD). 13/23. Jesse Quick informs the team that her father has been abducted, so Barry, Caitlin, Cisco and Julian voyage to Earth-2 on a mission to rescue Harry from Gorilla City.

9.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 7/7. A decorating disaster befalls the Trotters.

10.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,HD). 10.00 Plebs (R,S,HD). 3/8. 10.00 Celebs Go Dating 9/25. The team Marcus is keen to keep (S,HD). 12/20. Stephen investigates the murder his parents and Bear, Jorgie Porter, of a conspiracy theorist Delphine as far apart as Diversity’s Perri Kiely who apparently had possible. and Pussycat Doll compelling evidence Melody Thornton take 10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). that John F Kennedy’s part in the speed-dating 21/22. Quagmire’s cabinet ordered his event in the hope of father visits Quahog. assassination. finding romance.

10.00 Fawlty Towers (S). 6/6. 10.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind Manuel’s pet rat escapes. the Ropes Part Two (HD). A look ahead to 10.50 Fawlty Towers (S). 2/6. the heavyweight bout. Basil tries to save money on building costs. 10.30 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). Tony Bellew v BJ Flores.

11.00 Air Ambulance ER (R,S,HD). 4/6. A 16-yearold boy suffers a major head injury.

11.30 French and Saunders (S). 2/7. A spoof of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?

11.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD). A look ahead to the heavyweight bout. 11.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part Two (HD).

12.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 12.55 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 1.25 Release the Hounds: Famous & Freaked (R,S,HD). With Josh Cuthbert, Jaymi Hensley and JJ Hamblett. 2.20 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).

12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.10 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 3.00 Tattoo Fixers (R,S,HD). 3.55 The Goldbergs (R,S). 4.15 Black-ish (R,S,HD). 4.40 Charmed (R,S).

12.00 The Force: Manchester (R,S,HD). 1.00 Most Daring (R). 2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 3.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 4.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.30 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

12.10 Peep Show (S). 12.40 Peep Show (S). 1.15 French and Saunders (S). Kathy Burke guest stars. 1.55 French and Saunders (S). 2.30 Shooting Stars (S). 3.00 Shooting Stars (S). 3.30 French and Saunders (S). 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

12.00 Premier League Review (HD). 1.00 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 1.15 La Liga World (HD). 1.45 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 2.00 Premier League Years (S). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 4.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD).

RADIO

11.05 Naked Attraction (R,S,HD). 3/5. A single mother and a sales advisor take part.

Radio 2 Playlist: Morning Acoustic. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Wednesday Workout. Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Free Thinking. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. 11.00 Late Junction. 12.30am Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today. 5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today. 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament. 9.00 The Life Scientific. 9.30 One to

One. 9.45 (LW) Daily Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 The Whale Menopause. 11.30 Jazzed Up: How Jazz Changed Britain. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 Call You and Yours. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: The Mark. 3.00 Short Cuts. 3.30 Costing the Earth. 4.00 Word of Mouth. 4.30 A Good Read. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 Mark Watson Talks a Bit About Life. 7.00 The

Archers. Lynda sizes up her competition 7.15 Front Row. Kirsty Lang presents 7.45 A Small Town Murder. By Scott Cherry 8.00 File on 4. 8.40 In Touch. Presented by Peter White 9.00 Inside Health. Dr Mark Porter separates medical fact from fiction 9.30 The Life Scientific. Geneticist Alison Woollard explains her enthusiasm for a tiny nematode worm. Last in the series 10.00 The World Tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. 11.00 Sarah Kendall: Australian Trilogy. New series. A Day in October. By Sarah Kendall 11.30 Today in Parliament. Political round-up, with Susan Hulme Midnight News and Weather. 12.30

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

BBC4

6.50 The Other Boleyn Girl (HD) (2008). A bitter rivalry develops between two sisters as they compete for the affection of King Henry VIII. Historical drama, starring Natalie Portman. ●● 9.00 X-Men (HD) (2000). See Choices Above. ●●●● 11.05 Predators (HD) (2010). Hardened fighters from across the globe are taken to an alien jungle planet to become prey in a biggame hunt. Sci-fi thriller sequel, starring Adrien Brody and Topher Grace. ●●●

1.15 Gerry (HD) (2002). ●●●

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 10/22. 11.30 American Dad! (R,S). 8/16. 11.55 American Dad! (R,S). 2/16. Stan teaches sex education.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 BBC Radio 1 and 1Xtra’s Stories. 10.02 Huw Stephens. 1.00am Annie Nightingale. 4.00 Adele Roberts. Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Jamie Cullum. 8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 Nemone’s Electric 90s. 11.00 Listen to the Band. Midnight Sounds of the 80s. 2.00 Radio 2’s Folk Playlist. 3.00

Film4 11.00 Great Expectations (HD) (1946). ●●●●● 1.20 Decision at Sundown (HD) (1957). ●● 2.55 Night Passage (HD) (1957). ●● 4.45 Sink the Bismarck! (HD) (1960). ●●●●

Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast. Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Adrian Chiles. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport. 10.30 Phil Williams. 1.00am Up All Night. Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven. 8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather. 7.30 Weird Nature (R). 8.00 Planet Earth II (R,HD). Wildlife that inhabit the world’s grasslands. 9.00 The Secret Science of Pop (HD). Scientists and researchers analyse more than 50 years of UK chart music. 10.00 The Richest Songs in the World (R,HD). The 10 songs that have earned the most money of all time. 11.30 Indian Hill Railways (R). The lives and loves of workers on the Nilgiri Mountain Railway. 12.30 What a Performance! Pioneers of Popular Entertainment (R,HD). 1.30 The Real Tom Thumb: History’s Smallest Superstar (R,HD). 3.00 Planet Earth II (R,HD).

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EPW-E01-S1

CATASTROPHE 10pm, Channel 4

BENIDORM 9pm, ITV

TV PICKS

New series. The package-holiday comedy returns, as the Dawsons’ holiday starts with a bang when Eddie has an accident. Nigel Havers guest stars.

BBC1

In the event of live football being shown, the following schedule is subject to change. 6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD). 11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD). 2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

LITTLE BIG SHOTS 8pm, ITV

Dawn French presents this new series which gives a platform to some of the world’s most talented children, without forcing them to be subjected to any judges or a telephone vote. Instead, they get to have a nice, friendly chat with Dawn before showing off their incredible skills, which can range from cooking to a flair for spelling.

BBC2

6.30 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: See Hear (S,HD). 8.30 Sign Zone: Great British Railway Journeys (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 11.30 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Cash in the Attic (R,S). 1.30 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 2.00 Building Dream Homes (R,S,HD). 2.30 Channel Patrol (R,S,HD). 3.15 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 4.15 Africa (R,S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? 8pm, BBC1

UNDER LOCK AND KEY 10pm, Channel 4

The BBC news presenter Sophie Raworth traces her family tree, discovering tragic yet inspiring tales of her ancestors who risked everything to move to America.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD). 12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). With Becky Vardy. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 The Home Game (S). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard. 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

A special programme by the award-winning director Alison Millar, telling the stories of families whose loved ones are locked away in hospitals. This investigation into the treatment that vulnerable young people are exposed to in such institutions highlights the lack of bespoke care provided to meet their complex needs.

Channel 4

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 The Great British Benefits Handout (R,S,HD). Lorraine starts trading on the market. 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S). 2.15 NCIS (R,S). 3.15 Film: Fatal Honeymoon (S,HD) (2012). See Choices Above. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).

Incredible Medicine … 9pm

Coronation Street, 7.30pm

Location, Location, Location, 8pm

Climbing the Property Ladder, 9pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD). 6.30 Regional News (S). 6.55 Party Political Broadcast (S,HD). By the Conservative Party.

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.25 Party Political Broadcast (R,S,HD). By the Conservative Party. 6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 4/22. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Peri is dreading her first day back at school after Cameron’s arrest.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD). The Morgans’ secret is front page news. 6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD). Matt Baker presents the live magazine show featuring topical reports from around the UK and big-name studio guests. Followed by Regional News.

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). 53/85. 6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 8/10. Part two of two. Michael Portillo continues his Greek journey to Thessaloniki. 7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD). 3/10. Anita Manning and Raj Bisram conclude their trip across the South East of England.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Rakesh is held hostage. 7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Chesney decides to sell Sinead’s belongings.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Sinkholes: Buried Alive (R,S). See Choices Above. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

8.00 Who Do You Think You Are? (S,HD). 10/10. See Choices Above.

8.00 The House That £100K Built (S,HD). 2/6. Retired couple Derek and Christine from Huddersfield attempt to build their first house from scratch in the south-east of England, but the development does not go according to plan.

8.00 Little Big Shots (S). 1/6. See Choices Above.

8.00 Location, Location, Location (S,HD). Phil Spencer catches up with two pairs of house hunters, revisiting couples Jo and Ally, and Steve and Jo, to see if they managed to find the perfect home they were searching for.

8.00 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (S,HD). A young man suffering from acne visits the surgery hoping to start a new form of treatment, and a patient suffering from chronic pain seeks advice from the doctors. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

9.00 The Real Marigold Hotel (S,HD). 3/4. See Choices Above.

9.00 Incredible Medicine: Dr Weston’s Casebook (S,HD). 2/6. Surgeon Gabriel Weston investigates the human body’s ability to adapt for survival, meeting with individuals who push this aptitude to the absolute limit.

9.00 Benidorm (S,HD). 1/9. See Choices Above.

9.00 The Royal House of Windsor (S,HD). 2/6. This second episode reveals how Elizabeth and her father George VI kept up appearances while crises loomed on every front, as Britain suffered from crippling post-war austerity.

9.00 Climbing the Property Ladder (S). 4/6. A young woman decides to take on the challenge of renovating a property in the South Wales Valleys, pulling it apart brick by brick before putting it back together.

▼

6 7 8 9

Pointless, 5.15pm

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD). 10.30 Regional News (S). Followed by Regional Programme. 10.45 Peter Kay’s Car Share (R,S,HD). 2/6. John and Kayleigh get to know each other a little bit better.

10.00 Mock the Week (R,S,HD). 6/13. With Loyiso Gola, Milton Jones, Miles Jupp, Ellie Taylor and Josh Widdicombe. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 3/40. A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests. 10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 Under Lock and Key (S,HD). See Choices Above.

10.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away (R,S,HD). 5/14. Agents Paul and Steve face a moral dilemma in south London, when they find out the tenant they have been instructed to evict is on his way to a funeral.

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

11.15 Film 2017 (S,HD). Charlie Brooker reviews the X-Men blockbuster Logan. 11.45 The Big Painting Challenge (R,S,HD). 3/6. The contestants visit Whipsnade Zoo to paint the animals.

11.10 Weather (S,HD). 11.15 Dragons’ Den (R,S,HD). 16/16. Featuring a Welsh delicacy and a new fragrance. Last in the series.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.15 Robson Crusoe: A Surprising Adventure (R,S). Actor and presenter Robson Green fends for himself on a desert island.

11.00 999: What’s Your Emergency? (R,S,HD). Exploring the challenges that police custody teams face.

11.05 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords (R,S,HD). 4/13. A landlady gets a shock when she finally gains access to her property.

▼

EPW-E01-S1

WEDNESDAY

12.45 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.50 BBC News (S,HD).

12.15 1066: A Year to Conquer England (R,S,HD). Dan Snow explores events leading up to the Battle of Hastings. 1.15 Sign Zone: See Hear (R,S,HD). 1.45 Sign Zone: Trust Me, I’m a Doctor (R,S). Health advice. 2.45 Sign Zone: Royal Recipes (R,S). Food served at royal state banquets. 3.30 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests. 12.40 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 1000 Heartbeats (R,S,HD). Quiz show, hosted by Vernon Kay. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.05 The 2,000,000 Calorie Buffet (R,S,HD). Documentary about all-you-caneat restaurants. 1.00 Film: The Insider (S,HD) (1999). See Choices Above. ●●●●● 3.40 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). 4.35 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.05 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

12.05 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole (R,S,HD). People living on state welfare in Hull. 1.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Celebrity Carry on Barging (R,S,HD). 4.00 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.20 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

10 11 after

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

An investigation into sinkholes, a natural phenomenon that sees the ground give away as a result of weak acid attacking the rocks below, riddling them with holes like Swiss cheese. They can occur gradually or suddenly, when the ground gives away – swallowing animals, buildings and even entire highways.

Amanda and Rustie meet a bride-to-be who invites the whole group to her Hindu wedding, so they head out to buy traditional clothing, with hilarious consequences.

ITV2 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold Full Throttle (R,S). 9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD). 11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 12.55 You’ve Been Framed! Gold Strikes Back! (R,S). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

Sky1

6.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S). 6.10 Made in Chelsea (R,S,HD). 7.00 Game of Clones (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

SINKHOLES: BURIED ALIVE 7pm, Channel 5

THE INSIDER 1am, Channel 4

A tobacco company scientist blows the whistle on his employers deliberately making cigarettes more addictive. Fact-based drama, with Al Pacino.

GOLD

WEDNESDAY

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). The Antiques Roadshow arrives in Ludlow. 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 My Family (S). Ben and Susan babysit. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

Sky Sports 1 6.00 Football League Gold (S,HD). 6.15 Football Gold (S). 7.00 WWE Experience (S,HD). 8.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 10.00 Live ATP Tennis (HD). 2.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 3.00 Spanish Football Gold (S,HD). 3.30 Football Gold (S). 4.00 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 4.30 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 5.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD).

Through the Keyhole, 9pm

Timeless, 9pm

The Blacklist, 9pm

The Rebel, 9.20pm

Live SPFL Football, 7.30pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 12/26. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 13/26.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 16/24. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 17/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 9/16. Leela faces a difficult choice. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 10/13.

6.00 My Family (S). 9/13. Ben and Susan babysit. 6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 1/7.

6.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part Two (HD). 6.30 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

7.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). Comical clips, narrated by Harry Hill. 7.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S).

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Leela is horrified when she gets a threatening note in the post. 7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD).

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 11/13. Bart is sent to France on a student exchange. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 12/13.

7.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 7/7. A decorating disaster befalls the Trotters.

7.00 Premier League World (S,HD). 7.30 Live SPFL Football (HD). Inverness Caledonian Thistle v Celtic (Kick-off 7.45pm).

8.00 Two and a Half Men (S). 1/23. Walden creates the perfect proposal atmosphere for Zoey’s birthday. 8.30 Two and a Half Men (S). 2/23. Zoey and Walden break up.

8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24. Sheldon’s grandmother visits Pasadena and ends up clashing with Amy. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24.

8.00 MacGyver (S,HD). 4/22. Mac and Jack team up with a Russian bomb programmer and his estranged handler to shut down a Soviet-era nuclear warhead in Moscow.

8.00 Boomers. 1/6. Sitcom, starring Philip Jackson and Alison Steadman. 8.40 Marley’s Ghosts (S). 1/6. Marley’s ex-lover’s past comes back to haunt him.

9.00 Through the Keyhole (R,S,HD). 7/8. Keith Lemon hosts the game show in which panellists David Haye, Samia Longchambon and Dave Berry are challenged to identify the homes of the rich and famous.

9.00 Timeless (S,HD). 12/16. Flynn travels back to 1882 and joins forces with infamous outlaw Jesse James, and Lucy, Wyatt and Rufus look to an iconic marshal to help them bring the fugitives to justice.

9.00 The Blacklist (HD). 12/22. Liz and the team hunt for an elusive killer who murders her victims with a rare and fatal disease. Meanwhile, Red’s operations come under attack and he reaches out to Tom for help.

9.20 The Rebel (S). 1/3. A recently bereaved 70-year-old tries to make a citizen’s arrest on a thief raiding the till at his favourite charity shop. Comedy, with Simon Callow and Anita Dobson. 10.00 Not Going Out (S). 1/8. Tim puts the flat on the market. 10.40 Not Going Out (S). 2/8. Lee pretends to be gay.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 11/22. Brian discovers Meg has a secret boyfriend. 11.30 American Dad! (R,S). 9/16. Francine tries to make new friends.

11.05 Supernatural (S,HD). 9/23. Sam and Dean are taken to a governmentrun detention facility.

11.00 The Force: Manchester 11.20 Peep Show (S). 3/6. 11.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind Mark needs to find a (R,S,HD). 1/10. the Ropes Part One girlfriend before his Documentary following (HD). A look ahead to birthday party. the work of Greater the heavyweight bout. Manchester Police. 11.55 Peep Show (S). 4/6. 11.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind Jeremy’s mother and her the Ropes Part Two boyfriend pay a visit. (HD).

12.00 American Dad! (R,S). Stan refuses to be seen with Steve. 12.35 Two and a Half Men (R,S). 1.05 Two and a Half Men (R,S). 1.30 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 2.00 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 2.30 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

12.05 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.35 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.00 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.05 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 2.55 Supernatural (R,S,HD). 3.40 Timeless (R,S,HD). 4.25 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.45 Charmed (R,S).

RADIO

10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 10.00 Celebs Go Dating (R,HD). 9/24. Callen’s (S,HD). 13/20. Nadia and father Garrison is found Eden are frustrated with in the hospital room of how Stephen Bear treats an NCIS patient during a his dates, and Ferne radiation poisoning McCann keeps Lee on case, and Callen must the back burner while take him to the she explores her other boatshed for dating options. interrogation.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 The Surgery with Gemma & Dr Radha. 10.02 Huw Stephens. 1.00am Benji B. 4.00 Adele Roberts. Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 The Folk Show with Mark Radcliffe. 8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 Gretchen Peters – Sad Songs Make Me Happy. 11.00 The People’s Songs. Midnight Pick of

the Pops. 2.00 Radio 2’s Country Playlist. 3.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Relax. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Radio 2 Rocks. Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 3.30 Choral Evensong. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Free Thinking. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. 11.00 Late Junction. 12.30am Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today. 5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today. 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament.

9.00 Midweek. 9.45 (LW) Daily Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 10.56 The Listening Project. 11.00 Everybody Hates Me. 11.30 Simon Evans Goes to Market. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: Baller. 3.00 Money Box Live. 3.30 Inside Health. 4.00 Thinking Allowed. 4.30 The Media Show. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 It’s Jocelyn. 7.00 The Archers. Rex and Anisha meet

in secret 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 A Small Town Murder. By Scott Cherry 8.00 The Moral Maze. Michael Buerk chairs a debate on ethical issue 8.45 Four Thought. 9.00 Costing the Earth. 9.30 Midweek. 9.59 Weather. 10.00 The World Tonight. With Ritula Shah 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. 11.00 Tim Key’s Late Night Poetry Programme. 11.15 Helen Keen’s It Is Rocket Science. 11.30 Today in Parliament. Analysis of the day’s developments Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 12.45 Sailing By. 12.48 Shipping

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

A woman goes on honeymoon to Australia, only to drown during a scuba-diving trip. Her father is not convinced this was an accident, and begins to suspect her husband of murder. A year later, he finally finds the evidence to prove his accusation. Fact-based crime drama, starring Harvey Keitel.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 Prince Valiant (HD) (1954). ●● 1.05 Winchester ’73 (HD) (1950). ●●●● 2.55 Doctor in Distress (1963). ●● 5.05 The Gunfighter (HD) (1950). ●●●

6.50 The Secret Life of Bees (HD) (2008). ●●● 9.00 Escape Plan (HD) (2013). A security expert is incarcerated after being duped and tries to break out with the help of a fellow convict. Thriller, with Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger. ●●● 11.15 A Time to Kill (HD) (1996). A lawyer in Mississippi defends a black man charged with killing the racist thugs who raped his 10-yearold daughter. Courtroom drama, with Samuel L Jackson. ●●●●

2.10 Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (HD) (1999). ●●

10.00 Plebs (R,S,HD). 4/8. Grumio is cast to play the part of Cupid in a play. 10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 20/22. Peter, Quagmire and Joe are reunited with Cleveland.

1.00 Getting On (S). Kim tries to progress through her training. 1.40 Getting On (S). Pippa receives some good news. 2.15 Shooting Stars (S). 2.45 Shooting Stars. 3.15 Shooting Stars (S). With celebrity hairdresser Nicky Clarke. 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

FATAL HONEYMOON 3.15pm, Channel 5

10.00 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD). Memorable stoppages by both boxers. 10.30 Premier League World (S,HD). A round-up of the latest news.

12.00 Premier League World (S,HD). 12.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 1.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 2.00 Premier League Years (S,HD). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 5.30 Spanish Football Gold. 5.45 Spanish Football Gold (S,HD). Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast. Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Emma Barnett. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport. Coverage of the evening’s FA Cup fifth-round replays. 10.30 Phil Williams. 1.00am Up All Night. Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven. 8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather. 7.30 Reel History of Britain (R). Melvyn Bragg explores the ‘60s. 8.00 Jet! When Britain Ruled the Skies (R,HD). Part one of two. Exploring advances in aviation in the 1950s and 60s. 9.00 Roots (HD). Chicken George makes his way back to America. Last in the series. 10.25 Wild China (R,HD). The lives of animals inhabiting the Tibetan plateau. 11.25 Imagine: Dame Shirley Bassey: The Girl from Tiger Bay (R,HD). A celebration of Shirley Bassey’s 2009 album The Performance. 12.25 Archaeology: A Secret History (R,HD). 1.25 Treasures of Ancient Egypt (R,HD). 2.25 Wild China (R,HD). 3.20 Britain on Film: Animal Magic (R,HD).

GET UP

£10,0TO00 CASH ADV ANCE

WE’LL BUYYOURR HOUSE FORCASH!

Timescale to suit - in as little as 7 days All property types in any condition Best price paid!

Rated

On Feefo.co m

Call us for FREE to get a same day cash offer

0800 031 9094 Buying houses for 77 years

MoveAnyHouse.com *On exchange of contracts

EPW-E01-S1

THE REAL MARIGOLD HOTEL 9pm, BBC1

PRIME SUSPECT 1973 9pm, ITV

TV PICKS

New series. Crime drama prequel following the early career of Jane Tennison, as she starts out as a probationary officer in London.

BBC1

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

HARRY HILL’S ALIEN FUN CAPSULE 8.30pm, ITV

New series. Madcap panel show presented by the comedian, who presides over two teams nominally tasked with saving the planet from any potential alien invasion. The first episode features panellists Kathy Burke, Lorraine Kelly, Ainsley Harriott and Joe Lycett, who must find clips, people and anything that is fun or funny.

BBC2

6.30 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: An Island Parish: Anguilla (R,S). 8.30 Sign Zone: Great British Railway Journeys (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Cash in the Attic (R,S). 1.30 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 2.00 Building Dream Homes (R,S,HD). 2.30 Channel Patrol (R,S,HD). 3.15 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 4.15 Africa (R,S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

A VERY BRITISH HOTEL 9pm, Channel 4 New series. Behind the scenes at London’s Mandarin Oriental Hyde Park, located in the heart of Knightsbridge and one of the world’s most exclusive hotels.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD). 12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). With guest Brian Conley. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 The Home Game (S). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard. 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

EXTREMELY BRITISH MUSLIMS 10pm, Channel 4

What is it like to be a Muslim living in Britain in the 21st century? This documentary tries to answer that question by offering viewers an insight into the lives of several members of a community living in Birmingham, where a baby boy is more like to be given the name Mohammed than any other.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S). 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD). 12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD). 1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun (R,S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole (R,S,HD). Roma people who moved to the UK. 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS (R,S). 3.15 Film: A Date to Die For (S) (2015). Thriller, starring Victoria Pratt. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD). Amy learns that Leo could take over Lassiters.

The Great Pottery Throw … 8pm

Emmerdale, 7pm

The Supervet, 8pm

The Nightmare Neighbour … 8pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD). 6.30 Regional News (S). 6.55 Party Political Broadcast (S,HD). By the Labour Party.

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.25 Party Political Broadcast (S,HD). By the Labour Party. 6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5/22. With the voice of Steve Carell. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Leela is horrified when she gets a threatening note in the post.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD). Evelyn is terrified when Matt tries to tackle the blaze. 6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD). 7.30 EastEnders (S,HD). Denise is thrown into turmoil when she goes to sign the adoption consent form. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). 54/85. Quiz show. 6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 9/10. Michael Portillo ventures deep into the Black Forest in Germany. 7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD). 4/10. Charles Hanson and James Braxton continue their Scottish trip, starting in Inverkeithing before heading for auctions in Dundee and Hamilton.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Lawrence changes his will. 7.30 NHS – Medical Blunders Revealed: Tonight (S,HD). Jonathan Maitland investigates medical mistakes.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords (R,S,HD). Landlady Rachel gets a shock when she finally gains access to her property. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

6 7 8 9

EastEnders, 7.30pm

8.00 Shop Well for Less? (S,HD). 2/6. Alex Jones and Steph McGovern help sales manager Kevin and estate agent Yolanda, a shopping obsessed couple desperate to save some money for their upcoming wedding.

8.00 The Great Pottery Throw Down (S,HD). 5/8. The potters must make as many goblets as they can in 15 minutes, and Kate Malone challenges them to coil a jug to look like a piece of fruit.

8.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Ronnie is arrested. 8.30 Harry Hill’s Alien Fun Capsule (S). 1/6. See Choices Above.

8.00 The Supervet (S,HD). Professor Noel Fitzpatrick and his team fight to save the leg of a muchloved golden retriever, while, a French bulldog with twisted elbows needs a wheelchair and some surgery.

8.00 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (S,HD). Three disputes concerning noise levels in Lancashire, Lincolnshire and Norwich, with one in particular having a violent and tragic outcome. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

9.00 Britain on the Fiddle (S,HD). 1/3. New series. Stories from the frontline of fraud investigation, featuring a cigarette smuggler and a fraudster who has so many identities, investigators are not sure who they have under arrest.

9.00 The Attack: Terror in the UK (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 Prime Suspect 1973 (S,HD). 1/6. See Choices Above.

9.00 A Very British Hotel (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 The Great British Benefits Handout (S,HD). 3/6. See Choices Above.

after

▼

10.00 MOTD: The Premier League Show (S,HD). Magazine programme featuring news and highlights. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 4/40. A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests. 10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 Extremely British Muslims (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

10.00 Celebrity Sex Pod (S,HD). 2/3. Model and reality star Chloe Khan considers surgery to her vagina, while TOWIE duo Courtney Green and Chloe Meadows want to know how many sexual partners it is acceptable to have.

▼

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD). 10.30 Regional News (S). 10.45 Question Time (S,HD). 21/37. Topical debate from Bedford, chaired by David Dimbleby.

11.45 This Week (S,HD). The past seven days in politics.

11.10 Weather (S,HD). 11.15 Meet the Lords (R,S,HD). 1/3. Documentary following life at the House of Lords.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.15 Tipping Point (R,S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard.

11.05 24 Hours in A&E (R,S,HD). Staff and patients talk about the importance of family support.

11.05 100 Per Cent Hotter (S,HD). 1/10. New series. Two people with extreme styles receive makeovers.

▼

EPW-E01-S1

THURSDAY

12.30 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.35 BBC News (S,HD).

12.15 Diana: Designing a Princess (R,S,HD). 12.45 Sign Zone: Life in Immigration Town – Panorama (R,S). 1.15 Sign Zone: June Brown at 90: A Walford Legend (R,S). 1.40 Sign Zone: The Real Marigold Hotel (R,S). Eight celebrities embark on an experimental adventure to India. 2.40 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests. 12.40 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 NHS – Medical Blunders Revealed: Tonight (R,HD). 3.25 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.05 Sex Party Secrets (R,S,HD). 1.05 Married Behind Bars (R,S,HD). 2.00 Britain’s Racist Election (R,S,HD). 2.55 Inside Britain’s Airports: Channel 4 Dispatches (R,S,HD). 3.25 The Health Detectives (R,S,HD). 3.50 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). 4.40 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.05 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Cruising with Jane McDonald (R,S,HD). The singer sails the River Danube on one of the most luxurious ships of its type. 4.00 Witches: A Century of Murder (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Divine Designs (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

In Romford, east London, 53-year-old selfproclaimed business entrepreneur Lorraine finds the new family dynamic a shock to the system. Now an empty-nester, she is more determined than ever to make her longedfor market stall a success.

Drama-documentary based on real-life stories from inside the UK’s counter terrorism unit, focusing on an IS-inspired terrorist group planning a firearms attack.

ITV2 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.30 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 9.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD). 11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 12.55 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 1.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

Sky1

FILM PICKS

THE GREAT BRITISH BENEFITS HANDOUT 9pm, Channel 5

THE THREE MUSKETEERS 6.50pm, Film4

A swordsman and a trio of royal guards fight to foil a plan to overthrow the king. Adventure, with Luke Evans and Milla Jovovich.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 7.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). Marlene plans to renew her marriage vows with Boycie. 8.40 The Brittas Empire. 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 My Family (S). Ben and Susan begin parenting classes. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

Sky Sports 1 9.00 Premier League World (S,HD). 9.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 10.00 Premier League Years (S). 12.00 Football’s Greatest Players (S). 1.00 Great Sporting Moments (HD). 2.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 3.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 4.00 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD). 4.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.30 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

Release the Hounds ... 9pm

Gap Year, 9pm

Arrow, 9pm

Mrs Brown’s Boys, 9.20pm

Live Darts, 7pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). Unlikely insurance claims. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 8/28.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 18/24. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 19/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 11/16. The Professor chooses his successor. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 13/13.

6.00 Boomers. 1/6. 6.45 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 4/7. Hyacinth makes expensive holiday plans.

6.00 Premier League World (S,HD). A round-up of the latest news. 6.30 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

7.00 You’ve Been Framed! Harry’s Favourites (R,S). 23/26. Comedian Harry Hill presents his favourite camcorder calamities.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Charlie continues to give Nancy the cold shoulder. 7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD).

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 21/22. Homer becomes a murder suspect. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 13/22. Grampa tries to woo a beautiful woman.

7.25 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 5/7. Hyacinth finds a hobby for Richard.

7.00 Live Premier League Darts (HD). All the action from round five at the Westpoint Arena in Exeter.

8.00 Two and a Half Men (S). 4/23. Walden begins to feel his age. 8.30 Two and a Half Men (S). 5/23. Walden dates Rose, despite Alan’s warnings.

8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24. The gang hear all about one another’s Christmas adventures. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (S,HD). 13/24.

8.00 DC’s Legends of Tomorrow (R,S,HD). 12/17. The team’s hunt for the Spear of Destiny gets tougher when they learn shards of it are being guarded in different time periods.

8.00 Fawlty Towers (S). 1/6. In the first episode of the comedy, Basil tries to upgrade his clientele. 8.40 Fawlty Towers (S). 4/6. Hotel inspectors throw Basil into a panic.

9.00 Release the Hounds: Famous & Freaked (S,HD). 4/7. YouTube stars Alfie Deyes, Joe Sugg and Marcus Butler enter the forest at dusk and endure a series of spooky challenges in order to win cash prizes. Reggie Yates hosts.

9.00 Gap Year (S,HD). 2/8. May has to go to a cousin’s wedding in Hangzhou, and Ashley insists that Greg and Dylan tag along, but the family reunion is not what any of them imagined.

9.00 Arrow (S,HD). 14/23. China White, Cupid and Liza Warner break out of prison and head to Star City for revenge and the ACU makes a surprising arrest amid the chaos.

9.20 Mrs Brown’s Boys (S). 1/6. Agnes tries to solve Dermot’s relationship problems.

10.00 Stan Lee’s Lucky Man 10.00 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 1/10. Harry (S,HD). 14/20. Jorgie meets a mysterious Porter and James are woman wearing a now officially an item bracelet identical to his. and the agents send Return of the crime reluctant Ferne McCann drama co-created by and Pussycat Doll comic-book legend Stan Melody Thornton on Lee, starring James blind dates to see if they Nesbitt. can find true love.

10.00 Little Britain (S). 1/8. The first ever episode. 10.40 Little Britain (S). 2/8. David Soul guest stars.

10.00 Haye v Bellew: The Countdown Part One (HD). A look ahead to the heavyweight bout. 10.30 La Liga Show (HD). A look ahead to forthcoming fixtures.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 16/22. Lois encourages Brian to submit a script for a TV pilot. 11.30 American Dad! (R,S). 10/16. Stan and Roger exchange lives.

11.05 The Big Bang Theory 11.00 A League of Their (R,S,HD). 4/24. Penny Own (R,HD). 8/10. With arranges a date for Raj. Nicole Scherzinger, Noel Fielding and James 11.35 The Big Bang Theory Haskell. (R,S,HD). 5/24. Sheldon’s old adversary Wil Wheaton returns.

11.20 Little Britain (S). 3/8. Daffyd meets gay Star Trek fans.

11.00 Haye v Bellew: The Countdown Part One (HD). A look ahead to the heavyweight bout. 11.30 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). Three David Haye bouts.

12.05 American Dad! (R,S). 12.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S). 12.55 Two and a Half Men (R,S). 1.25 Release the Hounds: Famous & Freaked (R,S,HD). With Alfie Deyes, Joe Sugg and Marcus Butler. 2.20 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen.

12.05 Tattoo Fixers (R,S,HD). 1.10 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 3.00 Gap Year (R,S,HD). 3.55 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.15 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.40 Charmed (R,S). An amorous demon kidnaps Phoebe.

12.00 Peep Show (S). 12.35 Peep Show (S). 1.05 Big School (S). Mr Gunn discovers one of the pupils could be his son. 1.45 Big School (S). 2.20 Shooting Stars. 2.50 Shooting Stars (S). 3.20 Police Squad! (S). 3.45 Police Squad! (HD). 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

12.00 Betfred Super League Highlights (HD). 12.15 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 12.30 Premier League Darts (HD). 3.30 Premier League Match Pack (HD). 4.00 La Liga Show (HD). 4.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.30 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD).

RADIO

10.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 14/22. Lois agrees to be a surrogate mother. 10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 12/22. Peter and Lois visit a psychic.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 Radio 1’s Artist Takeover with. 10.02 BBC Radio 1’s Residency. Midnight BBC Radio 1’s Residency – Will Atkinson. 1.00 Toddla T. 4.00 Adele Roberts. Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Bob Harris Country. 8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 The Radio 2 Arts Show with Jonathan Ross. Midnight The Craig

Charles House Party. 2.00 Radio 2’s Tracks of My Years Playlist. 3.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Have a Great Weekend. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Feelgood Friday. Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Free Thinking. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. Midnight Late Junction. 12.30 Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today. 5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today.

8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament. 9.00 In Our Time. 9.45 (LW) Daily Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 From Our Own Correspondent. 11.30 Radioactive Art. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: Inappropriate Relationships. 3.00 Ramblings. 3.27 Radio 4 Appeal. 3.30 Open Book. 4.00 The Film Programme. 4.30 BBC Inside Science. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30

Meet David Sedaris. 7.00 The Archers. Ruth lends an ear 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 A Small Town Murder. By Scott Cherry 8.00 The Briefing Room. 8.30 The Bottom Line. An overview of the business world 9.00 BBC Inside Science. Presented by Adam Rutherford 9.30 In Our Time. 10.00 The World Tonight. With Ritula Shah 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. 11.00 Rashid Goes to Hollywood. Comedy by Jon Holmes and Shane Wall 11.30 Today in Parliament. Presented by Susan Hulme Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 12.48 Shipping

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast. Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Emma Barnett. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport. 8.00 5 Live Sport: 5 Live Boxing. 9.00 5 Live Sport: BeSpoke. 10.00 Question Time Extra Time. 1.00am Up All Night. Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven. 8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Jane Jones.

THURSDAY

WILD TALES 9pm, Film4

Anthology of six stories in which everyday social grievances push ordinary people into an extreme course of events. Comedy drama, with Dario Grandinetti.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 The Undefeated (HD) (1969). ●● 1.20 It Came from Beneath the Sea (HD) (1954). ●●● 2.55 Harvey (HD) (1950). ●●●●● 5.00 Carry On Cabby (1963). ●●●

6.50 The Three Musketeers (HD) (2011). See Choices Above. ●●● 9.00 Wild Tales (HD) (2014). See Choices Above. ●●●● 11.20 The Lincoln Lawyer (HD) (2011). A cynical lawyer realises the rich man he is defending on a rape charge may have escaped justice for another attack in the past. Thriller, with Matthew McConaughey and Marisa Tomei. ●●●●

1.40 Me and You (HD) (2012). A teenager hides in a cellar, only for his solitude to be invaded by his drugaddicted step-sister. Bernardo Bertolucci’s drama, with Jacopo Olmo Antinori and Tea Falco. ●●●

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather. 7.30 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 8.00 Thailand: Earth’s Tropical Paradise (R,HD). Exploring the wildlife and culture of Central Thailand. 9.00 Sound Waves: The Symphony of Physics (HD). Singer Lesley Garrett joins presenter Dr Helen Czerski to examine sound. 10.00 Andrew Marr: My Brain And Me (R,HD). The broadcaster reveals his story of recovery from a stroke in 2013. 11.00 The Nazis: A Warning from History (R). 11.50 Fifties British War Films: Days of Glory (R,HD). 12.50 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 1.20 Sounds of the Eighties (R). 1.45 Sound of Song (R,HD). 2.45 Sound Waves: The Symphony of Physics (R,HD).

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EPW-E01-S1

THE ATTACK: TERROR IN THE UK 9pm, BBC2

TV PICKS

SCHOFIELD’S SOUTH AFRICAN ADVENTURE 8pm, ITV

New series. In the first of three programmes, Phillip Schofield and wife Steph visit South Africa.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Britain’s Home Truths (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Wanted Down Under Revisited (S,HD). 11.45 Oxford Street Revealed (R,S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD). 2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

THE SECRETS OF YOUR FOOD 9pm, BBC2

Michael Mosley and James Wong reveal the physics, chemistry and biology hidden inside various foods. In the opening episode they explore how this chemistry fuels and builds bodies, with Michael sampling most people’s first meal – human breast milk, which contains important fats, vitamins and minerals.

BBC2

6.00 The World’s Most Photographed (R,S). 6.30 Wanted Down Under Revisited (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: Big Dreams Small Spaces (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Coast (R,S,HD). 1.25 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 1.55 Landward (S,HD). 2.25 Mountain (R,S). 3.25 Africa (R,S,HD). 4.20 A Place to Call Home (S,HD). 5.15 Antiques Road Trip (R,S,HD).

TRACEY ULLMAN’S SHOW 9.30pm, BBC1

GOGGLEBOX 9pm, Channel 4

Songstress Adele compiles her latest album, while Dame Maggie has some of the best acting tips imaginable. Comedy sketches, starring Tracey Ullman.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD). 12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). Topical debate from a female perspective. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 James Martin’s French Adventure (S,HD). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

The nation’s favourite armchair critics share their opinions on what they have been watching during the week as this popular series returns for its ninth run. The show secured a Bafta in 2014 and National Television Award in 2015, 2016 and 2017 and remains one of Channel 4’s biggest attractions.

Channel 4

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 Storm Surge: Winter Road Rescue (R,S,HD). 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS (R,S). 3.15 Film: Patricia Cornwell’s At Risk (S,HD) (2010). Mystery, starring Andie MacDowell. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD). Leo is shaken by news of his father.

Eggheads, 6pm

Emmerdale, 7pm

Hollyoaks, 6.30pm

Cruising with Jane McDonald, 9pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD). 6.30 Regional News (S).

6.00 Eggheads (R,S,HD). 102/140. 6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 5/10. Part one of two. Michael Portillo takes a trip in a Maserati sports car.

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 1/22. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Warren calls Prince wanting to know where Shane is.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD). Heath is taken in for questioning about Gunno’s death. 6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD). 7.30 A Question of Sport (R,S,HD). With Lynsey Sharp, Andrew Johnston, JP Pietersen and Kevin Davies. Followed by Regional News.

7.00 Big Dreams Small Spaces (S,HD). 6/6. In Blackpool, Monty Don helps Alex turn her boring backyard into a magical enchanted forest. Last in the series.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Laurel visits Ashley at the care home. 7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Michelle tells Steve that she would like to try for another baby.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Happy Campers: Caravanning (R,S,HD). A couple travel to a caravan site in Whitby to get married. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

6 7 8 9

Not Going Out, 9pm

8.00 EastEnders (S,HD). Konrad invites Shirley out for dinner. 8.30 Room 101 (S,HD). 6/9. See Choices Above.

8.00 Mastermind (S,HD). 30/31. Five more semi-finalists compete for a place in the final. 8.30 Only Connect (S,HD). 31/37. The Surrealists take on the Korfballers in a quarter-final match.

8.00 Schofield’s South African Adventure (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above. 8.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Aidan realises Jenny’s intentions.

8.00 Jamie and Jimmy’s Friday Night Feast (R,S,HD). 1/6. Orlando Bloom joins hosts Jamie Oliver and Jimmy Doherty to rustle up a Moroccan tagine.

8.00 Celebrity Carry on Barging (S,HD). See Choices Above. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

9.00 Not Going Out (S,HD). 6/8. Lee and Lucy attend a marriage counselling session. 9.30 Tracey Ullman’s Show (S,HD). 4/6. See Choices Above.

9.00 The Secrets of Your Food (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 Piers Morgan’s Life Stories (S,HD). 4/4. Former Ukip leader Nigel Farage reflects on his life, his numerous brushes with death and achieving his ultimate political objective via the EU referendum. Last in the series. Postponed from 3 February.

9.00 Gogglebox (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 Cruising with Jane McDonald (S,HD). 3/4. The singer sails the Danube on one of the most luxurious ships of its type, as she makes her first foray into the realms of the river cruise.

after

▼

10.00 QI (S,HD). 18/18. Part two of two. Highlights of the “N” series of the comedy panel game. Last in the series. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 ITV News at Ten (S); Weather. 10.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 10.40 Fishing Impossible (R,S,HD). 8/10. The guys head to Laos in search of the devil catfish.

10.00 The Last Leg (S,HD). Adam Hills, Josh Widdicombe and Alex Brooker are joined by celebrity guests for a comic review of the significant moments of the past seven days.

▼

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD). 10.25 Regional News (S). Followed by Regional Programme. 10.35 The Graham Norton Show (S,HD). 19/20. Guests include Hugh Jackman and Patrick Stewart.

11.25 The Real Marigold Hotel (R,S,HD). 2/4. The group celebrates Amanda’s 81st birthday together.

11.00 Weather (S,HD). 11.05 Further Back in Time for Dinner (R,S,HD). 5/6. The Robshaws enter the 1940s and experience a decade dominated by war.

11.10 The Wine Show (R,S,HD). 8/14. Matthew Goode and Matthew Rhys visit Bologna.

11.05 8 Out of 10 Cats (S,HD). 9/12. With Gabby Logan, Ellie Simmonds, Alex Brooker and David O’Doherty. 11.55 Rude Tube (R,S,HD). 7/10.

▼

EPW-E01-S1

FRIDAY

12.25 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.30 BBC News (S,HD).

12.05 Terry Pratchett: Back in Black (R,S,HD). 12.55 Film: Big Jim McLain (S) (1952). Spy drama, starring John Wayne. ●● 2.20 Sign Zone: Birds of Paradise: The Ultimate Quest (R,S). 3.20 Sign Zone: The Brit Who Tried to Kill Trump (R,S). 4.05 Sign Zone: Royal Recipes (R,S). 4.50 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.10 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 Freeze Out (R,S,HD). Quiz show, hosted by Mark Durden-Smith. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service.

12.55 Film: Man on a Ledge (S,HD) (2012). See Choices Above. ●● 2.40 Time Crashers (R,S,HD). Celebrities experience life in different eras. 3.35 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 4.00 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 4.30 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). Phil checks on a cluttered family home in Cheshire. 5.25 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

10.00 The Freddie Mercury Story: Who Wants to Live Forever? (R,S,HD). Documentary exploring two of the most important years in the Queen singer’s life, from his performance at the Live Aid concert in 1985 to his diagnosis with Aids in 1987.

12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Secrets of the Great Train Robbery (R,S,HD). Careless errors made by the thieves who famously raided a Royal Mail train on August 8, 1963. 4.00 Benefits: 26 Kids and Claiming (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

Embarking upon the second of their aquatic ambles, Nigel Havers, Debbie McGee, Lorraine Chase and Simon Callow set out from Grindley Brook, England, to follow the Llangollen Canal to Wales. The trip allows them to go antique shopping in the Shropshire town of Whitchurch.

Frank Skinner invites sports presenter Gabby Logan and comedians Richard Ayoade and Alun Cochrane to express their anger over people, events and objects that upset them.

ITV2 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 9.30 Ninja Warrior UK (R,S,HD). 10.30 Film: St Trinian’s (S,HD) (2007). ●●● 11.30 FYI Daily. 11.35 Film: St Trinian’s (S,HD) (2007). ●●● 12.30 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

Sky1

7.30 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs (R,S,HD). 8.00 Brooklyn NineNine (R,S,HD). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

CELEBRITY CARRY ON BARGING 8pm, Channel 5

MAN ON A LEDGE 12.55am, Channel 4

An escaped convict threatens to jump from a skyscraper, while his brother carries out a plan of his own in the ensuing chaos. Thriller, with Sam Worthington.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.00 The Brittas Empire (S). 3.20 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 5.20 Miranda (S). Part one of two. The shop owner has two proposals to decide between.

Sky Sports 1 12.00 Football Gold (HD). 1.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 1.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 2.00 Premier League Legends (HD). 3.00 Football Gold (HD). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 4.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League Match Pack (HD). 5.30 Premier League Legends (HD).

Hot Fuzz, 9pm

Men in Black II, 8.15pm

Stan Lee’s Lucky Man, 9pm

The Vicar of Dibley, 8pm

Live EFL, 7.30pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 11/23. 6.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S). 13/23.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 10/24. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 11/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 3/16. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 14/25. Bart and Lisa become stranded on an island.

6.00 Miranda (S). 2/2. 6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 5/10.

6.00 Premier League Match Pack (HD). 6.30 The Fantasy Football Club (HD).

7.00 100% You’ve Been Framed! (R,S). 23/23. Harry Hill narrates a selection of viewersubmitted comical clips.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Drama following a group of young people in Chester. 7.30 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs (S,HD). 30/30.

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 6/22. Lisa runs for class representative – against her best friend. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 6/25.

7.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 6/10. Onslow’s birthday causes trouble.

7.30 Live EFL (HD). Wolverhampton Wanderers v Birmingham City (Kick-off 7.45pm).

8.00 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 18/24. 8.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 19/24. Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers to each other.

8.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S). Amusing internet videos. 8.15 Men in Black II (S,HD) (2002). Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones. ●●

8.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). Grampa discovers he is about to become a father again. 8.30 Modern Family (S,HD). 9/22. Manny and Luke put on a winter ball at the school.

8.00 The Vicar of Dibley (S). 1/8. The villagers of Dibley discover their new vicar is a woman. 8.40 The Vicar of Dibley (S). 2/2. Part two of two. Dawn French stars in the last-ever episode.

9.00 Stan Lee’s Lucky Man (S,HD). 1/10. New series. Harry meets a mysterious woman wearing a bracelet identical to his. Return of the crime drama co-created by comic-book legend Stan Lee, starring James Nesbitt.

9.50 The Black Adder (S). 1/6. Edmund’s father becomes king.

9.00 Hot Fuzz (S,HD) (2007). A zealous policeman is relocated to a sleepy country village, where a series of grisly so-called accidents arouses his suspicions. Action comedy, starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. ●●●●

11.20 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 12/22. Peter and Lois visit a psychic. 11.50 Family Guy (R,S,HD). 5/22. Stewie discovers a pop star’s surprising secret.

11.05 Tattoo Fixers (R,S,HD). 11.00 Freddie Down Under Self-professed mummy’s (R,S,HD). 6/6. Andrew boy Lloyd asks Sketch to Flintoff and Rob Penn erase his misunderstood conclude their barbecue etching. adventure. Last in the series.

11.15 The Mighty Boosh (S). 2/6. Vince tries to impress his new punk mates. 11.55 The Mighty Boosh (S). 1/6.

11.45 Premier League Match Pack (HD). A look ahead to the next round of fixtures.

12.20 American Dad! (R,S,HD). Stan’s father turns up. 12.50 American Dad! (R,S,HD). Roger slips into a coma. 1.15 Ibiza Weekender (R,S,HD). Jordan is forced to take charge. 2.15 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 5.45 Nightscreen. Text-based information service.

12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.05 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 First Dates Abroad (R,S). 3.05 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 3.30 Rude Tube (R,S). 3.55 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.15 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD).

12.35 The League of Gentlemen (S). Pauline adapts to life outside prison. 1.15 The League of Gentlemen (S). 1.55 Nathan Barley. 2.25 The Armando Iannucci Shows (R,S). 2.55 Nighty Night (S). 3.30 Getting On (S). 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

12.15 Premier League Preview (HD). 12.45 Football Gold (S). 1.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 2.00 Premier League Preview (HD). 2.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 3.00 Premier League Preview (HD). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 4.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD).

RADIO

10.35 Blackadder Goes Forth 10.15 Premier League (S). 6/6. Capt Blackadder Preview (HD). The pretends to be insane. weekend’s fixtures. 10.45 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). Paul Merson and Max Rushden host a light-hearted discussion on fantasy football issues and the weekend’s Premier League matches.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 The Official Chart with Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Greg James. 7.00 Danny Howard. 10.00 Pete Tong. 1.00am B.Traits. 4.00 Radio 1’s Essential Mix. Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Tony Blackburn’s Golden Hour. 8.00 Friday Night Is Music Night. 10.00 Sounds of the 80s. Midnight Huey Morgan. 3.00 Radio 2’s Funky Soul

Playlist. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Today’s Top Hits. Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Gade. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Gade. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 The Verb. 10.45 The Essay: The Other Auld Alliance. 11.00 World on 3. 1.00am Through the Night. Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today. 5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today. 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament. 9.00 Desert Island Discs 9.45 (LW) Daily

Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Deaths of the Poets. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 Graffiti: Paint and Protest. 11.30 Secrets and Lattes. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 The Untold. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: Control. 3.00 Gardeners’ Question Time. 3.45 The Hitchhiker. 4.00 Last Word. 4.30 Feedback. 4.55 The Listening Project. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 The News Quiz. 7.00 The Archers. Justin is over the moon 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 44 Scotland Street By Alexander McCall Smith. Last

in the series 8.00 Any Questions? From Edwinstree Middle School in Hertfordshire 8.50 A Point of View. Reflections on a topical issue 9.00 Against the Grain. Parts 1-5 10.00 The World Tonight. With James Coomarasamy 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. By Colson Whitehead 11.00 Late Night Woman’s Hour. Lively conversation 11.30 Today in Parliament. Mark D’Arcy reports from Westminster 11.55 The Listening Project. Two writers who find publishers’ expectations can place limits on creativity Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Deaths of the Poets. 12.48 Shipping

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

A woman and her daughter offend the moral code of a French village when they open a chocolate shop during Lent. Drama, with Juliette Binoche.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 Thunder Island (1963). ●● 12.20 Doctor in Distress (1963). ●● 2.30 Winchester ’73 (HD) (1950). ●●●● 4.20 The Undefeated (HD) (1969). ●●

6.40 Chocolat (HD) (2000). See Choices Above. ●●●● 9.00 The Guest (HD) (2014). A couple invite an old friend of their dead son to stay with them, but begin to wonder if he is what he appears to be. Thriller, starring Dan Stevens and Maika Monroe. ●●●● 11.05 Red Eye (HD) (2005). A hotelier on a flight to Miami realises a passenger she has befriended is intent on involving her in a political assassination. Thriller, with Rachel McAdams. ●●●

12.45 Lesson of Evil (HD) (2012). ●●●●

10.00 The Blacklist (R,HD). 10.00 Celebs Go Dating 11/22. Red gets wind (S,HD). 10/20. Events that the US Witness take a dramatic turn for Protection list is under the worse on Melody threat from an elite Thornton and Ferne organisation of female McCann’s double date thieves, so he when Ferne is suddenly encourages Liz to go taken ill. undercover in the gang to save it.

12.00 A League of Their Own (R,HD). 1.00 Most Daring (R). 2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 3.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 4.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.30 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

FRIDAY

CHOCOLAT 6.40pm, Film4

Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast. Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Sam Walker. 1.00pm The Friday Sports Panel. 2.00 Kermode and Mayo’s Film Review. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport: The Friday Football Social. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. 1.00am Up All Night. Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Bill Turnbull. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven. 8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Katie Breathwick. 4.00 Jane Jones.

7.00 World News Today (HD) 7.30 Top of the Pops: 1983. 8.00 The Good Old Days (R). 8.40 Sounds of the Seventies (R). 8.50 Sounds of the 60s (R). 9.00 Queen: From Rags to Rhapsody (R,HD). Documentary following the band’s early years. 9.55 Queen: The Legendary 1975 Concert (R). A performance by the rock band. 11.00 Even More Guitar Heroes at the BBC (R). Performances by Status Quo, the Who and Dire Straits. 12.00 When Albums Ruled the World (R,HD). 1.25 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 2.00 Queen: From Rags to Rhapsody (R,HD). 3.00 Even More Guitar Heroes at the BBC (R).

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EPW-E01-S1

ROOM 101 8.30pm, BBC1

WHAT’S ON

FILM LISTINGS LITTLE THEATRE CINEMA

St Michaels Place, Bath 0871 902 5735 Blinky Bill [U] Sat: Kids’ Club. 1015 (activities), 1100 (film) Christine [15] Tue: 1815. Thu: 1030 (Silver Screen). Dancer [12A - drug references, nudity] Thu: 1815. Fences [12A - outdated use of racist language] Fri: 1430, 2015. Sat: 1300 (with subtitles for the hearing impaired), 1810. Sun: 1440, 1730. Mon: 1500, 2040. Tue: 1030 (Silver Screen), 2040. Wed: 1045 (Big Scream), 1430, 1745 Thu: 1430, 2020. Hidden Figures [PG] Fri: 1500, 1750. Sat: 1450, 2100. Sun: 1200, 2020. Mon: 1730, 2015. Tue: 1330, 1610. Wed: 1440, 2020. Thu: 1300, 1530, 2100

JUNKYARD

Fri Feb 24 to Sat Mar 18, Bristol Old Vic, King Street, £9.50-£30. 0117 987 7877, www.bristololdvic. org.uk Recommended age 14+. Bristol’s Soap Soup Theatre reprise two of their previous beloved family shows. The Snow Baby offers beautiful tabletop puppetry, imaginative storytelling and music to give you goosebumps. The Owl & The Pussycat is a delightfully unpredictable story. Owl is a poet, intent on writing his greatest masterpiece yet, but he shares his den with the Pussycat who likes telling stories too and she has a quite a different approach! This unlikely pair work and play together, creating magical worlds amongst the things in their den.

THE SNOW BABY AND OWL & THE PUSSYCAT

Sat Feb 4, Wardrobe Theatre, West Street, Old Market, Bristol, 11am Snow Baby, 2pm Owl & The Pussycat, £6 or £10 for both if booked by telephone. 0117 902 0344, www.tobaccofactory theatres.com Bristol’s Soap Soup Theatre reprise two of their previous beloved family shows. The Snow Baby offers beautiful tabletop puppetry, imaginative storytelling and music to give you goosebumps. The Owl & The Pussycat is a delightfully unpredictable story. Owl is a poet, intent on writing his greatest masterpiece yet, but he shares his den with the Pussycat who likes telling stories too and she has a quite a different approach! This unlikely pair work and play together, creating magical worlds.

SQUEEZY GREEN’S COMPENDIUM OF GAMES

JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS

BABY FACE

Sat Feb 4 & Sat Feb 11, Redgrave Theatre, Redgrave Theatre, Percival Road, Bristol, 10.30am, £8. redgravetheatre.com Meet Jason and the Argonauts – the original superheroes! A refugee forced out of his own land, Jason sets out on an epic quest across the known universe to find the magical Golden Fleece, that will prove his identity, and allow him to find a home. Jason assembles the ultimate crew of misfits and outcasts and their journey brings them face-to-face with terrifying dangers, before Jason has to face the ultimate peril – himself. A bold and accessible piece of theatre presented by Bristol Old Vic Theatre School. Suitable for anyone over the age of five with a taste for adventure.

ABOVE: La La Land [12A – contains infrequent strong language] Fri: 2040. Sat: 1200. Mon: 1215. Tue: 1230. Wed: 5.30. Thu: 1100. Lion [PG] Fri: 1730. Sat: 1545. Sun: 2000. Mon: 1800. Tue: 1520. Wed: 2045. Thu: 1740. Rusalka (Met Opera) Sat: 1755 (live). Mon: 1300 (encore). The Salesman [12A - sexual violence references, moderate sex references, violence] Sun: 1345. The Sleeping Beauty (ROH Live) Tue: 1900 Toni Erdmann [15] Sun: 1630. Wed: 1100. Tractor Ted (Toddler Time) Tue: 1100.

Sun Feb 5, Wardrobe Theatre, West Street, Old Market, Bristol, 2pm, £6 adult/£4 child/ under-threes free. 0117 902 0344, www.tobaccofactory theatres.com In this monthly show, Squeezy Green brings you some idiotic games to test your skills. Hosted by the irrepressible Squeezy and assisted by the unquenchable Finney Haddock, the audience is split into two teams and taken through a series of challenges. A lip lickin’ comedic afternoon of games for everyone to play.

Thur Feb 9 & Fri Feb 10, Wardrobe Theatre, West Street, Old Market, Bristol, 4pm, £10, £8 concs. 0117 902 0344, www.tobaccofactory theatres.com Part of the In Between Time Festival, Baby Face explores the paradox of living in a society that continues to infantilise women. A world of knee socks, bunches, lollypops, bubble-gum and models adopting the childlike expressions of six-year-old girls.

OUT

Thur Feb 9 & Fri Feb 10, Wardrobe Theatre, Wardrobe Theatre, West Street, Old Market, Bristol, 2pm, £10, £8 concs. 0117 902 0344, www.tobaccofactory theatres.com Part of the In Between Time Festival, Out is about shape shifting to fit in; to be black enough, straight enough, Jamaican enough...

THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA

To Sat Feb 4, Alma Tavern Theatre, Alma Vale Road, Clifton, Bristol, 8pm, £10, £8 concs. 0117 973 5171, www.almataverntheatre.co.uk Desperately down on his luck the old man, Santiago, resolves to row his little boat far out off the coast of Cuba, in an attempt to catch a marlin big enough to redeem himself in the eyes of his fishing community. He hooks a fish of mythical proportions and commits himself to a life and death struggle with an adversary as great as he is strange. This renowned piece of literature is perfectly adapted to the stage – a wonderful storytelling experience worthy of the Hemingway’s epic tale.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

MATTHEW BOURNE’S EARLY ADVENTURES

To Sat Feb 4, Theatre Royal Bath, Sawclose, Bath, 7.30pm, 2.30pm Sat mat, £21-£35.50. 01225 448844, www.theatreroyal.org.uk The UK’s favourite and most successful choreographer, Matthew Bourne returns to his roots in Early Adventures, a programme of hit pieces that launched his career. The programme forms part of the company’s 30th anniversary celebrations. A rare treat.

CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG

To Sat Feb 4, The Bristol Hippodrome, St Augustine’s Parade, Bristol, 7.30pm, 2.30pm mats, £18.50£49. 0844 871 3012, www.bristolhippodrome. org.uk An all-star cast of Jason Manford, Phill Jupitus and Claire Sweeney take to the stage in this most Fantasmagorical musical! Chitty Chitty Bang Bang will have audiences of all ages flying high with its mixture of madness, intrigue and exuberance. Can the loveable but whacky inventor, Potts, along with his children and the gorgeous Truly Scrumptious outwit the bombastic Baron Bomburst who has decreed that all children be banished from his kingdom? What happens when the children are caught and imprisoned with the other youngsters by the evil Childcatcher? Will it all end happily ever after? Well, of course it will!

THE MISER

Wed Feb 8 to Sat Feb 18, Theatre Royal Bath, Sawclose, Bath, various times, £26.50-£44.50. 01225 448844, www.theatreroyal.org.uk Griff Rhys Jones returns to the stage alongside fellow comedians Lee Mack (Not Going Out, Would I Lie to You) and actor Mathew Horne (Gavin and Stacey, The Catherine Tate Show) in this hilarious new adaptation of Moliere’s classic comedy. Fanatical about protecting his wealth, the paranoid Harpagon suspects all of trying to filch his fortune and will go to any length to protect it. Passion and purse strings go head to head in this rip-roaring comedy by France’s greatest dramatist. See pages 12 & 13.

THEATRE&COMEDY JUNKYARD

THE SNOW BABY AND OWL & THE PUSSYCAT

JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS

universe to find the magical Golden Fleece, that will prove his identity, and allow him to find a home. Jason assembles the ultimate crew of misfits and outcasts and their journey brings them face-to-face with terrifying dangers, before Jason has to face the ultimate peril – himself. A bold and accessible piece of theatre presented by Bristol Old Vic Theatre School. Suitable for anyone over the age of five with a taste for adventure.

SQUEEZY GREEN’S COMPENDIUM OF GAMES

BABY FACE

OUT

THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

AR TS LISTINGS JUNKYARD

THE SNOW BABY AND OWL & THE PUSSYCAT

JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS

WHAT’S ON

WEEKLY EVENTS IN BATH THURSDAY Bath Cantata Group St Stephen’s Church, Lansdown, Bath, 7.45pm. The Silver Ring Choir Manvers Street Baptist Church, Bath, 7.45pm. Sing B4 Supper The Huntsman, Bog Island, Bath. £5, 6.15-7.45pm. 07717173799 All Nations Bath English Lessons The Forum, 1A Forum Buildings, St James Parade, Bath, and at Hay Hill Baptist Church, Fountain Buildings, Paragon, various times and prices. For details visit www.allnationsbath. co.uk, email admin@allnationsbath.com Bath Scottish Dancers Bathampton Village Hall, 1.30pm beginners 3.30pm intermediate dancing. Contact 01225 722309. Zumba Class Hillside Hall, Oldfield Park, 7-8 pm £4. 07794 089741 Croquet Camerton and Peasedown Croquet Club, Redpost Ground on Whitebrook Lane, opposite Red Post Inn, Peasedown St John, Bath. £5, 2pm to 5pm Bath Stroke support group Turner Room Paulton Hospital Paulton, 1.30-3.30pm, 07597 242886 Mindful Tai Chi Percy Hall, United Reform Church, Grove Street, 11.30am to 12.30pm, £5/£3 01225 445145 Bath Buddhist Group 7 Grove Street, Bath, 7.45pm 07762 725419 West Bath Bridge Club Weston Parish Hall, Weston, Bath. £2 1.45-4.45pm Mr Wilkins’ Shilling Women’s Northwest Morris 8-10pm. Catholic Church of the Good Shepherd, 2 Northend, Batheaston 01225 852536 Bath Good Afternoon Choir 2-4pm. Argyle Hall, Central URC, Grove Street, Bath. £3.60 Daytime Singing Group 11am-12.30pm. Rush Hill United Reformed Church, Frome Road, Odd Down, Bath. 07592 016878 Bath Healing Drop-in Centre 11am-1pm. United Reform Church Hall, Grove Street, Bath. Donation basis Rubber Bridge (ACOL) 2-6pm hosted by Dennis Bernard in Weston. 01225 484523 Bath Bridge Club 7.15pm. Oldfield Old Boys Rugby Club, Shaft Rd Combe Down. 01225 310326 Knit Club at Great British Yarns 7-9pm. Unit 9, Brassmill Enterprise Centre, Brassmill Lane. 01225 462776 Bath Spa Band 8-10pm. Elim Pentecostal Church, Charlotte Street, Bath FRIDAY Avonside Bridge Club Duplicate Bridge, 7 for 7.15pm. Southdown Community Centre, The Hollow, Southdown, Bath. £3 table money Rubber Bridge (ACOL) Hosted by Dennis Bernard, 2-6pm. 01225 484523 SATURDAY Boule/Petanque 10am to 12noon, Larkhill Football Club Croquet £5, Camerton and Peasedown Croquet Club, Redpost Ground on Whitebrook Lane, opposite Red Post Inn, Peasedown St John, Bath. BA2 8JH, 2pm to 5pm Green Park Station market 9am to 4.30pm. Free Bath Cycling Club 9.15am, Cadence Bike Shop, Chelsea Road, Bath Bath Organic Community Garden 10am-1pm. Royal Victoria Park, Bath. 01225 311699 Over 8s Nature Club/Daycare 10am-4pm. Carlingcott, nr Peasedown. To book 07595034383 Bath

Saturday Antiques Flea Market 7.30am-5.30pm. Walcot St, Bath Green Park Market 9am-4.pm including Baths Farmers’ Market 9am-1.30pm. Green Park Station, Bath SUNDAY Croquet £5, Camerton and Peasedown Croquet Club, Redpost Ground on Whitebrook Lane, opposite Red Post Inn, Peasedown St John, Bath. BA2 8JH, 2pm to 5pm Bath Rambling Club 9am for 11-14 mile walk, 9.15am for 8-11 miles and 5-7 miles walk. Meet Laura Place, Bath Bath Cycling Club Start from Cleveland Bridge at 8.30am, return 1-1.30pm. Distance 50-70miles. Coffee and cake stop halfway. New riders welcome. Call 01225426467 0r 079440933. Dry Arch Growers Bathampton Community co-op, 11am-4pm. End of Holcombe Lane, Bathampton. 07972 564641 Spiritualist Meeting 6.30pm. Corston Village Hall, Sanctuary of the Cross Spiritualist Church Quiz Night Cross Keys, Midford Road, Bath 8pm. In aid of Dorothy House MONDAY Walcot Lunch Club Nexus (Walcot) Methodist Church (next to Hayes furniture store in London Road). Coffee and activities from 11am 50p; two course home-cooked lunch £3.70 served at 12.30pm. UK Age Transport available £4. For more details and booking please phone 01225 858444 or 461509. Widcombe Community choir Widcombe Social Club on Widcombe Hill, BA2 6AA, no audition, all welcome, 7.30pm to 9.30pm. widcombechoire@group Croquet £5, Camerton and Peasedown Croquet Club, Redpost Ground on Whitebrook Lane, opposite Red Post Inn, Peasedown St John, Bath. BA2 8JH, 2pm to 5pm Bathampton Bridge Club 1.15-4.30pm. Village Hall, Bathampton. £1.50 per session. 01225 460800 Spa Bridge Club Duplicate Bridge. 6.45 for 7.00pm. Odd Down Doctors’ Surgery, Bath. £2.50 table money. 01225 742277. Shotokan Karate 6-7pm (term time only), Combe Down Primary School hall (enter via Summer Lane entrance), £4 per session, family discounts – first lesson free Salsa Classes Complete beginners, no need to bring a partner. 8pm, £7/£5. The Westgate, Bath. 01225 335825 HumBugs Singing Group 9.30-10.30am term-time only. St Saviour’s Church, Larkhall, Bath. 07940 597427 2nd Bath Girls Brigade 6.30-8pm. The Ascension Church, Oldfield Park, Bath. 01761 416515 Bath Spa Band Rehearsals 8-10pm. Elim Pentecostal Church, Charlotte Street, Bath Social Bridge 1.30 for 1.45pm (not bank holidays). Museum of Bath at Work, Julian Road, Bath. 01225 310232 Meditation Classes 7-8.30pm. John Williams Room, United Reformed Church, Grove Street, Bath. £6 per class TUESDAY Clarity Choir Bath Tuesdays (term time) 10.30am12pm at Manvers Street Baptist Church. Scottish Dancing Ralph Allen School 7.30pm to 9.45pm . Visit www.rscdsbath.co.uk Single, Widowed, Divorced, Separated Join us at our regular social evenings and events. For further details Contact Pat 01373 455349 or Martyn 07775 897487 Bath Sakya Buddhism Meditation classes and a talk on Buddhism, 8pm, £4, Museum of Bath at Work, Julian Road, 07747 633 577, bath@dechen.org Bathampton Bridge Club 1.15-4.30pm. Village Hall, Bathampton. £1.50 per session. 01225

460800 Quilting Bee Textiles Room, noon-4pm. American Museum, Claverton Down, Bath Singing for the Brain For people with dementia and their carers, 2.30-4pm. West Free Church (Moravian), High Street, Weston, Bath. 07540 921035 Sing Alive Community Choir 10am-noon (term time). United Reform Church, Bradford on Avon. Bath Organic Community Garden 10am-1pm. Victoria Park, Bath. 01225 311699 Art Group Age UK B&NES 10am-noon. St Michaels Centre, St Michaels Place, Bath. £1.50 per session. 01225 484510 Avonside Bridge Club Duplicate Bridge, 7 for 7.15pm. Southdown Community Centre, The Hollow, Southdown, Bath. £3 table money Bath Bridge Club Duplicate Bridge with Masterpoints, start 7.15pm. Oldfield Old Boys Rugby Club, Shaft Rd Combe Down. 01225 310326 WEDNESDAY Songways Choir 7pm-9pm St Swithin’s Church, The Paragon, Bath BA1 5LY, songways.co.uk, 07894 205255 Bath Stroke Support Group. 2-4pm Chelwood Drive Community Hall Bath, 07597 242886 Age UK drop-in ‘Click Cafe’ Friendly help with your computer/iPad problems. £3 Coffee/Tea, Every Wednesday 10am – 12 noon St Michaels Centre, Bath (next door to the Little Theatre Cinema) Tel 01225 466135 Sahaja Yoga Free meditation, 7.30-9pm. Bath Central United Reformed Church Grove Street, Bath Bath Bridge Club Duplicate Bridge with Masterpoints, start 7.15pm. Oldfield Old Boys Rugby Club, Shaft Rd Combe Down. 01225 310326 Boules/Petanque 11am to 1pm Queen Square (off when raining). Just turn up and play Whist Drive 7-9pm.15pm, £3 including prizes and a raffle. Weston Parish Hall, Weston Village, Bath Knit Club at Great British Yarns All knitters welcome, 10.30am-12.30pm. Unit 9, Brassmill Enterprise Centre, Brassmill Lane, Bath. 01225 462776 Greensprouts Parent and Toddler Session Craft, singing, storytime, snack and lots of play, 10am-noon. Laurel Farm, Carlingcott, nr Peasedown. £3 a session. 01761 420204 Bath Welcome Choir 7.45-9.30pm. Upper Hall, Bath Community Academy (formerly Culverhay), Bath. £42 per term (10 weeks) or £6 per week.

MARCH

THURS 2 Bath Railway Society An illustrated talk by Patrick Griffin on Moving London Forward - Crossrail at St.Mary’s Church Hall, Bathwick. Starts 7.30pm. all welcome, visitors £2.50p . Refreshments. Book stall. Visit www.bathrailwaysociety.co.uk BRLSI - Research Now Felix Feng - Autonomous Vehicles: Technology and Psychology.16 Queen Square, 7.30pm FRI 3 BRLSI - Herschel/Astronomy Prof Carole Mundell - Black-hole Driven Explosions and the Dynamic Universe. 16 Queen Square, 7.30pm SAT 4 Best of Bath Music The Rotary Club of Bathavon presents the ‘Best of Bath Music’ featuring The Band of Avon Fire & Rescue, Capella Nova & The Military Wives of Colerne at St.Swithin’s Church, The Paragon, Bath BA1 5LY, 7.30pm. Tickets £10 from Bath Box Office 01225 463362, Park Pets, Moor-

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

land Road, 01225 316509, Pencil Tree, Cleveland Terrace 01225 427008 or On the door, Proceeds to Bath Rugby Foundation & other charities supported by Rotary Made in Combe Down Made in Combe Down is a new monthly market at Ralph Allen CornerStone, Combe Road, Combe Down, 10-4, free entry. Wonderful arts and crafts, great local talent MON 6 BRLSI - Bath NATS Rob Randall - Recording Wildlife in the Bath NATS area. 16 Queen Square, 7.30pm TUES 7 Cotswold Voluntary Wardens Walk Colerne Parish. 3 hrs. 5 miles. Moderate. Start at 10am at The Fox and Hounds Public House in Colerne, OS Map ST 818711. Park at pub or adjacent Constitutional Club. Bring a mid-morning munchie. Lunch available at pub. Not suitable for pushchairs. Bath All-comers’ Orchestra Rehearsal Monkton Prep School, Combe Down, BA2 7ET at 7pm. All orchestral instruments welcome, especially violas and bassoons! No auditions! Just turn up, email psbat4cr@talk21.com or call 01225 310455 BRLSI - Philosophy Prof DH Mellor - Artists and Engineers. 16 Queen Square, 7.30pm Bath Sakya Buddhist Group Meditation classes and a talk on Learning About Buddhist Meditation: View at 8pm. Everyone welcome at Museum of Bath at Work WED 8 BRLSI - Business and Economics Prof Antonio Gabrales - The Next Financial Hurricane. 16 Queen Square, 7.30pm THURS 9 BRLSI - BACAS Dr David Roberts - Recent Roman Discoveries in Wiltshire. 16 Queen Square, 7.30pm University of Bath Gardening Club Roy Lancaster, Plantsman Extraordinaire presents “My Life in Plants” at the University of Bath, Room EB1.1 (by East Carpark). 7.30pm Annual Membership £20 Visitors Welcome £6. Call 01225 315327 FRI 10 BRLSI - Bath Film Society Leviathan (Russia 2014), Andrey Zvyagintsev (director). 16 Queen Square, 7.30pm SAT 11 Cotswold Voluntary Wardens Walk Boyd Valley and Cotswold Escarpment. 4 hrs. 5 miles. Moderate. Start at 10 am. by Doynton Church, OS Map ST 720741. Follow river Boyd towards M4, pass through Hinton, ascend to Hinton Hill Fort, then Cotswold Way to Dyrham Wood. Please bring a packed lunch. Not suitable for pushchairs. Bingo night Bingo Night in Bathampton Village Hall. Bar; raffle; £12.50 includes a 2-course hot supper and 6 bingo cards. Tickets 01225 465781. All proceeds to the next Bathampton Village Show. 7.30pm (doors open 7pm), everybody welcome. BRLSI - Poet’s Voice Duncan McGibbon (organiser) - Poetry Workshop, all welcome. 16 Queen Square, 10am

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

SAMSAYS

CONTACT ME: samantha.walker@ localworld.co.uk 01225 322224

with editor Sam Walker

It’s all about the romance...

ow here’s a secret for you – I’m a bit of an old romantic.

One of my favourite films is Heartbreaker where French actor Romain Duris finds himself falling in love with Vanessa Paradis – despite him being something of a fraudster. And – spoiler alert – it does have a very happy ending, even though I doubt they’d have made the romance work in real life. Love was very much at play in this issue as it has a wedding theme. So if you – or someone you know – is planning on getting married have a look at our lovely features. We’ve found some quirky places to get married in Bath, 32, plus some wedding fayres where you’ll find everything you need under one roof, 34.

We’ve also got some fun and stylish cakes, 26, and perhaps best of all, some lovely vintage wedding photos from local residents who shared them with us, 10. We’ve also made sure families aren’t left out – as well as our pick of events, 20, we’ve got an interesting feature on 16. This asks the question are you a ‘sharent? ’ – that’s someone who shares far too much about their kids on social media. So if you can’t resist posting pictures of your kids on Facebook have a read as sometimes it can cause problems. We’ve also got the latest foodie news in our food round-up, 24 and What’s Ons, 6, so enjoy!

SAM’S CALL: BATH’S BEST BITS THIS WEEK...

3. LAUGH COMEDIAN: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. It starts at 12pm, to book call 01225 331922.

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2. DRINK

DON’T FORGET: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. It starts at 12pm, to book call 01225 331922.

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LAST MINUTE: Learn how to make your home look beautiful with a Colour in the Home talk by Joa Studholme from Farrow & Ball. The event at the Bath Priory costs £50 and includes a glass of Champagne, lunch, wine and coﬀee. Call 01225 331922.

BOOK

1. EAT

Cabaret ends its run at the Theatre Royal on Friday - there are still seats left but it’s ﬁlling up fast. Don’t miss this epic stage show. Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017

TOPSOIL AND STONE SUPPLIES

Dry high quality screened or unscreened Topsoil. Recycled aggregates and quarry stone supplies, road planings and building stone.

DEMOLITION AND STRIP OUT All types of demolition works. From small household to main contractor projects, including rail, schools and city centre redevelopments. Complete range of specialist equipment and services available.

ASBESTOS Asbestos removal and collection. Roof sheets, tiles and guttering. Call for information.

TRANSPORT 4, 6 and 8 wheeled tipper Lorries for hire and muck away. Low loader, beaver tail and road brush hire.

PLANT HIRE Wide range of plant. 360 excavators, Dumpers, Bulldozers and Crushers.

EXCAVATIONS Large and small excavations. Specialist works include Equestrian all weather surfaces, drainage and bulk excavations.

Bath Weekend, March 9, 2017