BGSD_GL

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GET CROWDFUNDING: BACKING FOR COUNTY FOODIES

FEB.25.2017

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BEHIND THE SCENES OF THE COTSWOLD SITCOM THAT'S RAISED A FEW EYEBROWS

A TASTE OF FRANCE WITH JAMES MARTIN

r e m m u S Lovin'

IN ASSOCIATION WITH

Bright ideas for your summer wardrobe plus expert tips on the fashion faux pas to avoid

GL, March 9, 2017

GL, March 9, 2017

INSIDE 06

saturday, march 22, 2017

Fashion: Florals for spring, groundbreaking!

Plus Manolo Blahnik

10

Meet the man putting the Force behind a very Gloucester craft beer

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Social Network: The hoi polloi at this week’s parties, launches and events

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Food: We taste the new menu at Cheltenham’s latest pop-up The Fox

18

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Feature: The Cotswolds on film - we look back at the counties’ screen outings

PAGE DESIGN DAVID LEWINS TARA PARDO PIP O’SHEA

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23

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Health: Tackling the taboo of crippling loneliness among young people

28

A trio of top interior designers share their own home secrets

28

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Travel: Take a relaxing spa break to Costa Rica

9

16

Recipe: Chow mein so good you’ll never eat takeaway again EDITOR JENNY EASTWOOD jenny.eastwood@ localworld.co.uk 01234 322224

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22

40

TO ADVERTISE: BEN CORLETT ben.corlett@ localworld.co.uk 078235 22388 JAMES ALLOWAY james.alloway@ localworld.co.uk 01179 343315 GL, March 9, 2017

spring at colston hall 0117 203 4040 colstonhall.org

wed 1 mar mike and the mechanics

fri 17 mar dakhla // remi harris trio

tue 21 mar alexis taylor

thu 2 mar ycat lunchtime concert: savitri grier and richard uttley

fri 17 mar alec dankworth spanish accents

wed 22 mar martin harley & daniel kimbro

fri 3 mar lack of afro

fri 17 mar bristol bluesmen

sat 4 mar henning wehn

fri 17 mar the big swing

sat 4 mar amp fiddler

sat 18 mar robben ford

sun 5 mar the grahams

sat 18 mar kirk fletcher // mud morganfield

mon 6 mar brit floyd

sat 18 mar moscow drug club

mon 6 mar oddisee & good compny

sat 18 mar sound for spies and private eyes

tue 7 mar albert lee tue 7 mar sue perkins tue 7 mar ram lunchtime concert: cameron johnson wed 8 mar the bill laurance group thu 9 mar hamilton leithauser thu 9 mar laura marling fri 10 mar bournemouth symphony orchestra: heroes and legends

sun 9 apr caro emerald mon 10 apr rick astley

sun 26 mar uwe singers and symphony orchestra

wed 12 apr monteverdi 450: il ritorno d’ulisse in patria

sat 18 mar dinosaur

tue 28 mar sklamberg & the shepherds

sat 18 mar ricky riccardi: how louis armstrong revolutionised popular music

tue 28 mar amy macdonald

thu 13 apr ycat lunchtime concert: nika goric and jonathan ware

sat 18 mar jason rebello sun 19 mar jimi hendrix (slight return) sun 19 mar ‘praise!’ featuring the london community gospel choir

sun 19 mar robin nolan trio

sun 12 mar an evening with hazel o’connor

sun 19 mar pee wee ellis & roger biwandu trio

tue 28 mar ram lunchtime concert: oscar caravaca wed 29 mar king ayisoba thu 30 mar kate simko & london electronic orchestra thu 30 mar sound industry conference fri 31 mar ycat lunchtime concert: alexander ullman fri 31 mar grandaddy fri 31 mar ibibio sound machine

sun 19 mar macy gray

sat 1 apr paul weller

sun 19 mar yazz ahmed

wed 15 mar flats & sharps

sun 19 mar jasper høiby’s fellow creatures

thu 16 – sun 19 mar bristol jazz and blues festival

mon 20 mar scott bradlee’s postmodern jukebox

thu 16 mar sari schorr & the engine room // northsyde

sat 25 mar bristol choral society & bristol ensemble: mendelssohn and mozart

sat 8 apr national children’s orchestras of great britain

sat 18 mar gilad atzmon & alan barnes

sun 12 mar devin townsend project

thu 16 mar metropolis with andy sheppard

fri 24 mar horse & bamboo theatre: theatre ballads

fri 7 apr winter mountain + brooke sharkey

tue 11 apr the john mccusker band

sun 19 mar the bobby shew big band – my friend dizzy

tue 14 mar ram lunchtime concert: ariel lanyi

thu 23 mar daniel lanois: solo instrumental av set

fri 7 apr jimmy carr

sat 25 mar devon sproule

sat 11 mar rodigan: my life in reggae

tue 14 mar jonwayne

thu 23 mar sean lock: keep it light

thu 6 apr bournemouth symphony orchestra: rococo and revolution

sat 1 apr manu delago tue 4 apr 10cc tue 4 apr john smith

tue 21 mar ram lunchtime concert: noemi gyori and katalin csillagh

wed 5 apr ne-yo wed 5 apr nathan fake

GL, March 9, 2017

thu 13 apr marcel lucont’s whine list fri 14 apr under the skin: mica levi + london sinfonietta sat 15 apr holy holy: the rise and fall of ziggy stardust and the spiders from mars sun 16 apr gipsy kings wed 19 apr bc camplight thu 20 apr the led zeppelin masters fri 21 apr laetitia sadier sun 23 apr al stewart sun 23 apr jambinai tue 25 apr koyaanisqatsi: gogo penguin wed 26 apr billy ocean wed 26 apr david starkey: henry viii thu 27 apr bournemouth symphony orchestra: love letters

STROUD AUCTION ROOMS

Entries now invited for our upcoming March auction to include jewellery & watches Gentleman's Pocket Watches Ladies Wristwatches Wristwatches

A Rolex Yachtmaster wristwatch Sold for £8000

Diamonds

An Art Deco diamond solitaire brooch.

Sold for £9,000

A ladies Rolex. Sold for £1,100

An 18ct gold gentleman's pocket watch and 18ct gold Albert. Sold for £1200 £120

Amber

A Baltic amber necklace Sold for £9000

Antique

A Georgian/ early Victorian necklace £1400

Contact Stuart Maule & Alexandra Bowkett DGA, GA Deadline for entries 20th February

FREE valuations every Friday & Saturday at our saleroom, at your home by appointment or why not email us a photograph for an instant valuation? info@stroudauctions.com

NO HIDDEN CHARGES OR FEES FOR UNSOLDS - LIVE ONLINE BIDDING ON ALL LOTS IN THE CATALOGUE - WHY ACCEPT LESS? We are regularly ranked no 1 in the country for the number of online bidders Unit J, Bath Road Trading Estate, Stroud, GL5 3QF

01453 766788 www.stroudauctions.co.uk GL, March 9, 2017

FASHION GET THE

LOOK

SPRING FLI NG

Fearne Cotton ticked off spring's biggest colour trend at the Garnier Ultimate Blends launch party last week.

Teaming her bubblegum pink ASOS knit with wet-look trousers and silver heels, the presenter showed us how to turn a wintry woollen into a really party piece.

SOMETIMES, THE SPRING COLLECTIONS OFFER US A FASHION OVERHAUL; A TECTONIC SHIFT IN SARTORIAL LANDSCAPE. SS17 IS, AS IT HAPPENS, NOT ONE OF THOSE SEASONS - BUT THAT'S ACTUALLY A VERY GOOD THING. WHY? BECAUSE WE'RE SEEING A BEAUTIFUL, SLOW EVOLUTION OF TRENDS, AND WE'VE TIME TO ASSIMILATE THEM INTO OUR WARDROBE BEFORE THE NEXT MAJOR UPHEAVAL. WHISPER IT: SPRING IS ALL ABOUT SUBTLE TWISTS, NOT SWEEPING STATEMENTS. HERE'S HOW TO WELCOME IN FASHION'S GENTLE NEW WAVE...

IN THE PINK

From Chloe's powder pink babydoll frocks to Balmain's floor-sweeping raspberry suede overcoat and everything inbetween, the rosy hue was inescapable on the catwalks, offering a multitude of ways to style it.

Even those who've previously sworn off the shade, thinking it too 'girly girl', will find it hard to resist the grungy allure of fuchsia lace, or blush pink velvet paired with black leather. ❖ Miss Selfridge Premium Angel Sleeve Midi Dress, £65; Drama Black Studded Biker Boots, £49; Black Mesh Socks, £3.50 (www. missselfridge.com)

ASOS High Neck Jumper with Cable Sleeves, £30 asos.com

BUY IT

NOW After getting a sneaky preview of the collections coming to brand new online retailer OwntheLook.com, we can hardly wait to get shopping

Lace mesh long-sleeved blouse, £19.99, OwntheLook. com

GET SHIRTY

The classic white button-down takes a back seat for spring, as deconstructed shirts come to the fore, with workmanlike blue playing up the mannish associations. Styled simply, these remixed staples elevate an ensemble with minimal effort. ❖ V by Very Deep Cuff Cotton Shirt, £30 (www.very.co.uk)

GL, March 9, 2017

HAVANA BALL Flamenco flounce has been making waves on the catwalks for a couple of seasons now, but this summer the trend really comes into its own on the high street, with an injection of steamy Cuban style.

Ruffled dresses and blouses have been rendered in sunset shades and tropical prints, ready for balmy nights on the beach (or the dance floor). ❖ Autograph Top, £45; Collection Trousers, £29.50, Marks & Spencer

STYLE STEAL

Combining dark florals and an abundance of ruffles, the Peacocks Signature collection, which lands in March, offers lots of drama for your dosh. Pair this lace blouse with a leather skirt and over-the-knee boots for a fiercely feminine look. ❖ Peacocks Black Blouse, £18

KNOT A PROBLEM

Another case of remixing rather than reinventing, a profusion of ties, knots, belts and bows was seen everywhere, from Alexander Wang (sporty drawstrings) to Proenza Schouler (loose obi belts). ❖ Closet London Tie Front Shirt with 3/4 Length Sleeves, £52 ❖ Miss Selfridge Tie Front Tea Dress, £25

Peacocks Halter Double Layer Dress, £16

GL, March 9, 2017

Timbercraft specialise in the design and installation of quality ďŹ tted kitchens. A family run company with 25 years experience, we offer a ďŹ rst class service that is second to none.

Browse our beautiful kitchens at www.timbercraft.co.uk

Clevedon 21-25 Alexandra Rd 01275 872 431 | Keynsham 29 High Street 0117 986 1896 Patchway 69 Gloucester Rd 0117 904 6352 | Thornbury 44 High Street 01454 281 002 | Wells Units 3-4 Keward Mill Est 01749 678 140

GL, March 9, 2017

BEAUTY

3

4

2 BOLD LIPS AND BRIGHT EYES - HERE’S WHAT’S IN FOR SPRING 2017

5

"Make-up that has been somewhere and done something... Lived!" is how Alex Box described the look at the Veronique Leroy show at Paris Fashion Week last September, and that's an apt description for the prevailing attitude when it comes to SS17 beauty.

Smudgy black eyeliner was ubiquitous, skin was glowing - almost raw - and even where colour was prominent, there was a real freedom to it. Hair had an equally unhurried feel, but make no mistake - it takes some doing to look this undone. Here's how to tap into spring's carefree mood...

1 3ina The Pencil Eye Shadow in 111 Black, £6.95 (www.3ina.com) 2 Paul & Joe Eyebrow Pen in Brown 02, £14 (BeautyBay.com)

6

3 Too Faced Brow Quickie Brush-on Brow Fiber Gel in Universal Brunette, £17 4 Max Factor Color Elixir Universal Lip Liner, £4.99, Boots 5 Kiko Cream Crush Lasting Colour Eyeshadow in Pearly Electric Blue, currently reduced to £4.80 from £6.90 (www.kikocosmetics.com) 6 Nars Soft Matte Concealer, £23 (narscosmetics. co.uk) GL, March 9, 2017

STEAL OF THE

WEEK

Save £34 on this GHD dual kit of straightener and travel hairdryer until the end of March. GHD Ultimate Travel Gift Set, £180 (www. ghdhair.com)

INTERVIEW

THE FORCE IS STRONG* WITH THIS ONE approx 5.5% abv

A BREWERY IN CIRENCESTER IS PROVING A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH. SUE BRADLEY MEETS THE MAN WHO SET IT UP AFTER A CAREER IN THE ARMY.

D

ETERMINATION, organisational expertise, resourcefulness, discipline and the ability to forge relationships with the locals: Charles Malet armed himself with an arsenal of transferable skills during his years in the Coldstream Guards.

Now he’s putting them to good use on civvy street by founding and running Force Brewery. Charles, 40, was a major in the oldest regiment in the British Army in continuous service and travelled the world during his six years’service, an activity that inevita-

GL, March 9, 2017

bly brought him into contact with a range of international ales. And while he didn’t realise it at the time, each glass he tried would go on to contribute to the range of beers that he’s now making at his brewery in an industrial unit on the outskirts of Cirencester.

“I left the army in order to start a business, and in the end I decided to go into brewing,” he explains. “Beer is certainly something I’ve enjoyed and taken an interest in over the years, although not to an obsessive degree.”

Charles has set up a tower brewing system, which harnesses the forces of

THUNDERBALL IS A FIVE PER CENT STOUT AND FELT LIKE THE SORT OF THING THAT THOR MIGHT SERVE AT A PARTY gravity and makes efficient use of a small space, to make his range.

His flagship beer is Yankee Zulu, a four per cent traditional golden bitter and Chasing Leather, a citrusy brew of a similar strength, along with the five per cent Thunderball stout, a 5.5 per cent pale ale called Cerberus Loose, made with a small quantity of peated malt from the distilling of whisky, and the five per cent Czech-style pilsner Withershins. All his products are made using British grains and the majority are flavoured with hops from the UK, although he

also uses varieties grown in the USA, France and Germany.

“I brew in small batches to ensure consistent quality,” says Charles, whose family farmed in Poulton for several years.

“The tower system means I don’t have to worry about pumps, and it’s a nod to the timehonoured way beer has been brewed in the UK.” Charles set the wheels for the brewery in motion three years ago,shortly after completing a Master of Business Administration qualification at the Royal Agricultural University in Cirences-

ter, and quickly realised that pubs didn’t represent a reliable market for his beers.

At the same time he noticed how local ales rarely featured at events he attended and went on to set his sights in this direction, supplying beers for shows, festivals, village fetes, weddings, barn dances and other occasions.

Another outlet that has proved especially successful is Force’s brewery tap evenings within the upper floor of the premises, which have built up a considerable following every Friday between 2pm and 9pm, so much so that Charles has now started running sessions on Saturdays between noon and 6pm. The area,which is furnished with a random selection of recycled chairs and tables, seats more than 40 people and offers a small selection of spirits,along with cider,available for those who aren’t so partial to ales. Food is provided by the fish and chip shop Seafare in Chesterton and Fratellos Pizzeria in the centre of Cirencester, with Jesse Smith’s Farm Shop providing Saturday brunch.

“Having other businesses on site has worked very well for all concerned,” explains Charles. “I do think that supporting business is important and here I’m not simply talking the talk. “If I want local people to support me, it has to work both ways.

The idea is for the brewery to be accessible and flexible. This brewery is all about people making of it what they will, whether it’s having their own private event, coming here for an event or even asking us to make bespoke beers for weddings or other occasions. “I’ve even had stag parties come here to brew their own beers for weddings. The personal relations side of the business is fantastic.” One thing Charles wasn’t able to bring from the army was a unit of soldiers to command, which means he’s brewer, barman and chief cask washer, as well as the director of Force Brewery,

GL, March 9, 2017

but he’s relishing his new challenge, not least the tricky question of what to call his beers.

“I came up with ‘Force’as the name of the brewery because I wanted a single word that was easy to spell and pronounce that wasn’t affected by geography,” he explains. “It suggests strength and draws upon the fact that this beer is created by the forces of gravity, as well as referring to my background in the armed forces.”

Yankee Zulu is the phonetic alphabet version of the last two letters of the brewery’s postcode, Cerberus Loose is made from a German hop called Herkules and recalls the hound of Hades sought by the Greek divine hero. Chasing Leather is designed for summer, which according to its maker is “all about cricket, which is chasing leather” and ‘Thunderball’ suggests an ale that’s dark and stormy.

“It’s a five per cent stout and felt like the sort of thing that Thor might serve at a party,” laughs Charles, who has a degree in political philosophy and history of art.

“At the same time the lyrics for the song Thunderball are by Don Black, which fits its colour. “Withershins means doing things back to front,or taking the path less trod, which is a bit like the way this pilsner is made.”

Force Brewery has already earned the seal of approval from Gloucestershire CAMRA, which named Yankee Zulu its champion best bitter shortly after the business was founded, and Charles hasn’t looked back since.

“For a lot people, being in the army is an incredible preparation for what they go on and do in life and I’d say that has been the case for me,” he says. “I think the best thing about running a brewery is that it’s fun. If I was going to start a business from scratch it had to be fun.”

FORCE BREWERY, GLOBAL BUSINESS PARK, CIRCENCESTER, FORCEBERWERY.COM

PROFILE

Charlie and Diasy May Cooper star in This Country Picture by Sophie Mutevelian.

LIGHTS, CAMERA...

COTSWOLDS! With the new BBC sitcom This Country raising a few eyebrows, Adam Hurrell looks back at some other of the Cotswolds appearances on screen

W

hen we think of the Cotswolds, what naturally springs to mind?

Thatched roofs, dry-stoned walls, gastro-pubs, muddy dogs and horses?

So far so traditional, and if previous film and TV efforts are to be believed this is all who live in the Cotswolds.

The final bastion of middle class England where everyone has a listed property and owns at least one muddy border terrier.

The area is loved for its period properties and unspoilt villages, qualities that are adored by the big-budget dramas that are devoured by the television viewing public, desperate for bit of rose-tinted nostalgia or when a Hollywood mega-budget movie needs a bit of quintessential England.

Whether it’s tripping over Renée Zellwegger, Colin Firth and Hugh Grant in “Bridget Jones Diary” in Snowshill or the cast of “Poldark” at Chavenage House, near Tetbury, the Cotswolds are the darling of the movie backdrop crowd.

But not all TV and film to come from the district fits this classic idyll though. It can, on occasions, be hilariously irreverent.

“This Country” is the latest mockumentary to come from BBC Three

and it pokes fun at those Cotswolds residents who have perhaps been previously less well represented. This new comedy takes the concept of the countryside underclass to a whole new level, and to a wonderfully funny one at that.

Poking fun at the rural locals has been done before of course, when Simon Pegg and Nick Frost had us all portrayed in hilarious style in the brilliant film, Hot Fuzz, where a rural town was represented by muttering West Country accented characters living in a falsely idyllic bubble.

However, this bubble comes to a crashing end when someone from the city turns up.

Perhaps the best scene is when the local tongue has to be translated for Simon Pegg when the team discover a stash of illegal weapons and a sea mine. For those local to the county, you can probably understand it without the translation.

Famously, although Hot Fuzz has a definite Gloucestershire theme and Simon Pegg is a Gloucester boy, the film was not filmed in the Cotswolds.

Stow-on-the-Wold had been scouted as a potential location but after negative comments from residents, council member at the time Robert Warner infamously said “no” to production

company, Working Title. This decision went on to become massively controversial among other people in the picturesque town.

“This Country” however, has been filmed locally, in Northleach and is written by brother and sister Charlie and Daisy Cooper, who are from Cirencester.

The show focuses on the lives of cousins, Kerry and Kurtan, who are disaffected youth from a Cotswold village. Poking fun at the lives of the young people in a Cotswolds village who are perhaps not part of the hunting, fishing, shooting stereotype the area has become known for the script mercilessly mocks them and their immediate family, friends and even, enemies. Speaking recently on BBC Radio Gloucestershire the authors described their motivation for writing the comedy on how they felt there had not been one like it before and that during their time living in London they had missed the area in which they grew up.

They describe how characters in the comedy are based on real people and while Charlie was working in Argos he was able to pick-up plenty of “inspiration”. While filming Charlie and Daisy described the locals as “absolutely lovely.” Strong language

GL, March 9, 2017

and thick Gloucestershire accents are key features to the brilliant characters, as are self-delusion and hints of rural poverty. It is a far-cry from the serenity of Whittingdon Lodge Farm where the nearby poppy fields were used in the war time epic drama “Atonement”, starring Keira Knightley and James McAvoy.

Speaking about why the Cotswolds are so popular with television and film production companies Councillor Chris Hancock, Cabinet Member for Enterprise and Partnerships, Cotswold District Council: “The Cotswolds provide great settings for a wide variety of film and TV productions and we are very pleased to welcome crews from around the world .

“Aside from our beautiful countryside, villages and towns, we also have many remarkable heritage and cultural assets and leisure activities which provide excellent backdrops for productions. It’s interesting that the BBC has also chosen to focus on the grittier side of the Cotswolds in a recent ‘mockumentary’ which focuses on the challenges facing young people in a rural environment.”

So next time you pop out for a walk in the Cotswolds, look out for that screen flat and costume lorry, you never know who may be in it…

UPSTAIRS AT THE HEN & CHICKEN 210 North St, Southville, Bristol, BS3 1JF

TOBACCO FACTORY THEATRE Raleigh Rd, Southville, Bristol, BS3 1TF

REDGRAVE THEATRE

promotes...

Percival Rd, Cli�on, Bristol, BS8 3LE

BRISTOL OLD VIC THEATRE King Street, Bristol, BS1 4ED

PROMOTING AND PRODUCING LIVE STAND-UP COMEDY IN BRISTOL SINCE 1994.

SATURDAY 7 JANUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

SATURDAY 14 JANUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

CARL

PIERRE

PAUL

PLUS GUESTS

PLUS GUESTS

PLUS GUESTS

Carl Donnelly takes the mundane stories of everyday life and turns them into stretches of self deprecating silliness.

"Excellent, fast-rising comic with pacy anecdotal routines" Sunday Times

Following on from a critically acclaimed run at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, award-winning comedian Pierre Novellie brings his unique brand of comedy to the Hen & Chicken.

"The dawn of a major talent" The Guardian

Smart, articulate and provocative, Paul Sinha is one of the funniest social commentators in the UK today. Hilariously funny, passionate and articulate stand up of the highest order.

"Highly original." Metro

DONNELLY HEN & CH ICKE N

HEN & CH ICKE N

THURSDAY 2 FEBRUARY 8.30PM £12

PHIL

ANDY

JERROD Phil Jerrod's innovative stream-of-consciousness style has seen him perform in venues across the UK and helped build his reputation as having grown one of the largest beards in stand-up comedy. "Casual brilliance..." The Guardian

SATURDAY 4 FEBRUARY 4PM £17.50

DAVID

4pm

HEN & CH ICKE N

As seen on Matt Forde's Unspun (Dave) and half of global hit satirical podcast The Bugle, Andy Zaltzman returns to plot his planet's path to and/or from preservation and/or perdition.

"Political comedy at its best" Sunday Times

UK T OUR

O'DOHERTY

BIG TIME

PLAN Z

David O'Doherty presents a brand new show of talking and songs played on a crappy keyboard from 1986. "O'Doherty expertly steers his way between the quirky, novelty and off-beat, as well as excellent traditional-style stand-up." The Scotsman

BRIS TO THEAL OLD V TRE IC

SUNDAY 5 FEBRUARY 8PM £15.50

SATURDAY 4 FEBRUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

UK T OUR

DR PHIL

BIG TIME

PLUS GUESTS

DR. PHIL'S HEALTH REVOLUTION

Owing to the huge demand for tickets to see David O'Doherty we have scheduled in a 4pm matinee show on Saturday 4 February.

Please note that this extra show takes place at the Tobacco Factory Theatre in Southville and NOT at the Bristol Old Vic Theatre.

Uniquely stubborn, outright impractical and undeniably hilarious, Carl Hutchinson is an award-winning comic who is in high demand across the UK. He also regularly supports Chris Ramsey on tour. "Immensely sharp with an underlying energy" Weekend Post

Laugh, sort your life out, stay sane, plan your death and save the NHS with Dr. Phil Hammond - NHS doctor, broadcaster, journalist and whistle-blowing comic. "One of the most entertainingly subversive people on the planet." The Guardian

MAT INEE

O'DOHERTY

SATURDAY 11 FEBRUARY 7.30PM £20

DANNY BAKER

UK T OUR

HEN & CH ICKE N

JUPP

R EX

SUNDAY 12 FEBRUARY 8PM £20

SATURDAY 11 FEBRUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

DALISO

RUBY

CHAPONDA HEN & CH ICKE N

Malawian Daliso Chaponda is a versatile comedian who is equally comfortable talking politics, romance, filth or religion. He is also wonderfully animated, full of extravagant gestures and impassioned speeches. "Raw Eddie Murphy confidence, cheek and super-polished style."

Liverpool Nerve

FRIDAY 17 FEBRUARY 8PM £18 UK T OUR JOHN

MONDAY 13 & TUESDAY 14 FEBRUARY 8PM £18.50

MILES

TOBA CC THEAO FACTO TRE RY

TENS

ION

UK T OUR

WAX

PLUS GUESTS

Comedy writer, journalist, radio DJ, screenwriter, and veteran contributor to NME, LWT, the BBC and Talk Radio, the legendary Danny Baker is out on tour embarking on his first ever one man show.

Tickets will not be available for long.

TOU

HAMMOND

HUTCHINSON

CRADLE TO THE STAGE

BRIS TO THEAL OLD V TRE IC

FRI 3 & SAT 4 FEBRUARY 8PM £17.50

CARL

DAVID

RED THEAGRAVE TRE

UK T OUR

HEN & CH ICKE N

ZALTZMAN

PLUS GUESTS

TOBA CC THEAO FACTO TRE RY

SINHA

NOVELLIE

SATURDAY 28 JANUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

HEN & CH ICKE N

SATURDAY 21 JANUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

FRAZZLED!

RED THEAGRAVE TRE

Legendary and much loved US born comedian Ruby Wax is an accomplished actor and writer.

Funny and insightful, this show is your passport to saner living. She might not be sane herself, but she does a pretty good imitation.

SATURDAY 18 FEBRUARY 8.45PM £11 ADV/ £13 OTD*

ZOE

LYONS

SHUTTLEWORTH

SONGS OF FREEDOM

MY LAST WILL AND TASTY MINT

PLUS GUESTS

Miles Jupp, host of Radio 4's The News Quiz, hits the road in a freshly-ironed shirt and some robust trousers and tries to make some bloody sense of it all. "Someone you could listen to forever on almost any subject" The British Comedy Guide

John Shuttleworth hits the road for his latest tour, following appearances on Celebrity Antiques Roadshow, Pointless, and the second series of Radio 4's John Shuttleworth's Lounge Music. "Contemporary character comedy at its finest" The Observer

Terrifically charismatic Zoe Lyons takes a sideways view of life, picking out the many absurdities and turning them into hilarious routines which she delivers with tremendous energy. "Enthusiastic, likeable... a razor-sharp talent." The Scotsman

BRIS TO THEAL OLD V TRE IC

HEN & CH ICKE N

* ADV = Advance booking online/ OTD = On The Day online or On The Door

See more / book online: THECOMEDYBOX.CO.UK GL, March 9, 2017

SOCIAL NETWORK

MAYOR’S HIGH TEA WHAT: Celebrating 150 years of Gloucester Guildhall WHERE: The Lewins Suite, Guildhall, Gloucester Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.

Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur.

Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum

MAGGIE’S CHARITY BALL WHAT: Marking Maggie’s cancer care centre’s fourth anniversary WHERE: Norton Hall, Cheltenham Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor. Duis aute irure dolor. Duis aute irure dolor duis aute irure dolor.

GL, March 9, 2017

OPENING OF LA MEMO BAR WHAT: New wine bar La Memo opens its doors WHERE: 166-167 Southgate Street, Gloucester Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.

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GL, March 9, 2017

FOOD REVIEW

A foxy place for a pub lunch THE FOX AT ODDINGTON

BY EMMA LUTHER HIGH STREET, LOWER ODDINGTON, GL56 0UR 01451 870555

T

he Fox at Oddington is one of those wonderful country pubs you wish you had in your village.

Full of jolly locals, walkers and a few well-behaved dogs for good measure, when we arrived on a busy Saturday lunchtime the place was in full swing.

Wellies lined the entrance next to a polite A-board asking walkers to remove muddy boots as we glanced at tables overflowing with delicious pub grub which created the most wonderful aroma to wander into.

Settled at a big table in one of the old fashioned windows we were handed a big silver jug of water to sip on as we looked through freshly printed out menus.

The warm, jovial atmosphere was a delight as we chatted through our options.

Smart yet casual staff dressed in jeans, coloured trousers and shirts were keen to answer any questions and had a relaxed, confident air as they buzzed attentively around tables with an eagle eye ensuring nothing was neglected.

An unusual dish of Imam Bayildi with mint yoghurt (£7.50) caught my partner’s eye. Unsure as to what to expect he was pleasantly surprised with his succulent and juicy circle of finely diced aubergine, tomato, onion and raisins. Served on a chargrilled flatbread with a cucumber and yoghurt sauce which gave a nice crunch, it was a light introduction to the meal. He had thought it may have been spicier with a small dish of yoghurt to offset it, but the very delicate flavours were not too strong. On the whole the cold starter was declared nice to have tried something different that he’d not had before and he particularly enjoyed the sweetness of raisins. I tucked in to a generous bowl of steaming hot, glossy black mussels (£7.50).

Settled in a rich creamy sauce with finely chopped onions they were perfectly cooked.

Along with plenty of chunks of white baguette to mop up the plentiful sauce it was a fantastic starter.

When it came to mains my beloved was slightly unlucky in that he got a rather serious case of food envy. While his crab linguine with garlic, chilli and parsley (£16) was good and he was satisfied with it, once he’d had a bite of my ox cheek bourguignon with pureed potatoes and local greens (£15.50) it paled into a lesser dish.

To be fair, he was handed a well presented bowl with generous pieces of flaked crab, along with some bigger chunks and a real whack of garlic. He reckoned it really needed all of the freshly squeezed lemon wedges on the side and an extra sprinkling of pepper to bring the flavours together. Although the

Cornish Hake on Butter Bean Cassoulet.

Below, Simon Pizzey Pictures; Mikal Ludlow

heat of the chilli came through the more he ate which was nice in a cold winter’s day. A small gripe was that the linguine was slightly overlooked, but with a chilled glass of Picpoul wine in hand which complemented the dish beautifully all was (pretty much) forgiven.

My dish was nothing short of incredible. Glossy gravy coated a tender huge slice of ox cheek. With carrots, tiny shallots and perfectly cooked al dente greens it was hearty comfort food at its very best.

It filled me up, warmed me up and left me smiling. It was so tasty and satisfying I felt like I’d had the best dish in the place by a mile. It couldn’t have been improved and was so wonderful I found myself talking about it into the evening when we met up with friends. When you find a great dish you rave about, you know you’ve found a real winner.

We had a nice little wait for desserts which us gave a chance to take in the relaxed country styling of the place. A trail of walkers trooped past, padding around in their socks, to grab a beer and packet of artisan crisps from a bowl at the bar, while they settled next to a huge vase of lilies. I looked down at flagstone floors and wondered why they couldn’t be swept of any mud until I

GL, March 9, 2017

EMMA’S VERDICT A warm and jovial service with hearty comfort food at its best. With wooden beamed ceilings and a roaring log burner to add to the atmosphere we were pretty much in heaven.

spotted a big pretty old homely rug which most certainly shouldn’t be stomped on.

We admired hyacinth shoots peeking out of mossy baskets as table decorations and I took a shine to an old wooden dresser next to our table. With wooden beamed ceilings and a roaring log burner to add to the atmosphere we were pretty much in heaven.

A shared classic dessert of dark, rich, not-too-sweet chocolate fondant (£7) with a lovely gooey centre contrasted with vibrant, cool raspberry sorbet to bring our delicious meal to a enthusiastic spoon-clashing close.

FOOD REVIEW

Stylish dishes in a very elegant setting HATTUSA AT BERWICK LODGE BERWICK DRIVE, BRISTOL, BS10 7TD. TEL: 0117 9581590. .BERWICKLODGE.CO.UK.

A

ccessed via a long and peaceful driveway that bisects a small copse, there’s something decidedly Harry Potter about Berwick Lodge as you first glimpse the imposing Victorian Arts & Crafts manor house through the trees.

With its red-brick Gothic facade and stunning gardens, it would make a decent stand-in for the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, although rather than the likes of Horace Slughorn and Pomona Sprout walking through the wood-panelled corridors, the hotel is run by the far more charming Sarah and Fevzi Arikan.

The Arikans opened Berwick Lodge eight years ago and they have worked tirelessly to put it on the map, as a boutique hotel but also as a dining destination.

Chef Paul O’Neill arrived at Berwick Lodge at the end of 2014. The winner of the prestigious Roux Scholarship competition, he previously worked at London’s iconic Claridge’s hotel.

With its stone pillars, impressive fireplaces, polished wooden floors and twinkling glass chandeliers, the ground floor restaurant has an immediate “wow” factor and our window table provided us with a tranquil view across the lawns dotted with snowdrops and crocuses – a sure sign that spring is on the way.

As well as the seasonal a la carte menu, there is also a more affordable brasse-

rie-style menu at lunchtime and we mixed and matched from both.

From the a la carte, tea-smoked duck, pickled orange gel, burnt orange, duck heart and watercress salad (£11.50) was a well balanced starter and a cheeky modern play on the classic French dish duck a l’orange.

The strips of tender, lightly smoked duck breast and more steak-like heart working beautifully with the orange elements and the peppery watercress.

Also from the a la carte, a piece of warm and juicy, citrus-cured sea trout (£10) – which had apparently been cooked “sous vide” in a water bath at 52°C – was teamed with an elegant, crunchy salad of apple and walnuts, with a pouring jug of chilled cucumber consommé.

From the brasserie menu, a rump steak (£22.50) from the adjacent Berwick farm required a bit of elbow grease and a sharp knife despite being cooked medium-rare, but it had a deep flavour and the accompaniments – chunky chips, onion rings, roasted field mushroom, grilled tomato and béarnaise sauce – were all spot on.

GL, March 9, 2017

Other options on this cheaper menu include sharing platters from £9.95; ham, egg and chips (£12.95) and Thai chicken salad (£10.50).

Jumping back to the a la carte, a beautifully cooked piece fillet of stone bass (£22) with brown shrimp butter, braised gem and potato salad and sweet and sour tomato was a light, delicate main course and a good excuse to end with a decadently rich salted caramel and chocolate mille-feuille (£9.50) with gossamer-thin layers of crisp pastry, hazelnut praline and intense Valrhona sorbet.

A boozy rum poached pineapple (£9) arrived with a perfect tonka bean crème brûlée, zesty pineapple and lime sorbet and crunchy coconut flakes.

FOOD ★★★★✩ SERVICE ★★★★✩ AMBIENCE ★★★★✩ VALUE ★★★★✩ OVERALL ★★★★✩

MARK TAYLORS’S VERDICT With its impressive Victorian building and stunning grounds, Berwick Lodge may have a bit of the Hogwarts about it, but it’s head chef Paul O’Neill who is conjuring up the culinary magic in the hotel’s elegant restaurant, whether you order from brasserie menu or go the whole hog with the a la carte.

RECIPE

IF YOU THINK VEGAN COOKING ISN’T FOR YOU, SAM MURPHY’S GORGEOUS DEBUT COOKBOOK MIGHT MAKE YOU RECONSIDER. THE BLOGGER-TURNED-AUTHOR TALKS TO KEELEY BOLGER ABOUT HER JOURNEY FROM EATING DISORDER TO FOODIE

I

n a tug-of-war relationship with food and fitness for many years, blogger Sam Murphy is the first to admit her initial foray into veganism wasn’t a healthy one.

The 24-year-old, who hails from New Zealand, had anorexia as a teenager, and initially, switching to veganism proved another means of controlling her eating and introducing new restrictions.

“I was raw vegan for a while, and I was so obsessed with eating only raw foods in their natural state,” explains Murphy. “I can see how easy it is to slip into that, because essentially it’s addictive, you become obsessed with it. It’s a control thing.

“If you’ve got something in your life that you feel a bit out of control with, a lot of us will turn to food and control that. I know I do.”

After moving to Melbourne, where she still lives and works in a vegan cafe, Murphy slowly began to change her habits and rebuild a healthier relationship with nourishing her body, reintroducing the full gamut of vegan-friendly foods (and actually cooking them), opening up about her experiences in her blog (sobeautifullyreal.com) and, eventually, shaking off her staunchly-held views of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ foods.

“Having spent so many years

having a very strict food rule list, I still catch myself out having those pre-conceived ideas about what is good and bad,” she admits. “It really restricts you creatively, but it also restricts your enjoyment for food. The challenge for me and for others is to break down barriers and just enjoy food as food, and obviously the important thing is keeping it within the realm of being dairy-free and cruelty-free.

“I don’t see any reason why you should have to label something good or bad; it should just be real food.”

Although she still has bad days, reflecting on her recovery, Murphy says: “I got to a point where my survival instincts kicked in. Something clicks, and you realise you definitely don’t want to live your life that way, and it’s that drive to keep striving for more but also to be really patient and really forgiving and loving towards yourself, and to know that you’re going to have ups and downs.

“As soon as I removed the expectation that recovery was going to be this consistent uphill on a progressive scale, it relaxed me a little bit more,” she adds. “I’m able to deal with those moments that aren’t so great, which I still have - I’m human.”

Her debut cookbook, Beautifully Real Food - a gorgeous, colourful

collection of mouthwatering vegan dishes - is clearly the work of somebody who now celebrates the joy of food.

She’s keen not to preach about veganism though, especially since, as a former meat-eater, she recalls finding the concept very alien.

“When I first heard of vegans, I thought it was the weirdest thing in the world. I was like, ‘What the hell do those people eat? It’s like eating grass!’” she says with a laugh.

“It’s different. People are very set in their ways and I was too, and I suppose it’s more about educating, just trying it out. I don’t expect everyone in the world to go vegan, but if they could just try a meal that is vegan, possibly not knowing that it is vegan first, that would be ideal, so they go in with a very open mind.

“The more people we can get on board, the better,” says Murphy. “I try not to push my views on people; I just welcome them in like ‘Hey, I’ll cook you some food and see if you like it!’”

KEEP IT REAL & GL, March 9, 2017

TURMERIC BAKED BEANS, POTATO HASH & SAUTEED GREENS (Serves 2) For the potato hash: 3 medium-large potatoes, peeled and chopped 1tbsp vegan butter

Give it a try: LOADED VEGAN HOT DOGS

For the sweet chilli sauce: 1-2tsp hot sauce or chilli paste 2tbsp reduced-salt tomato puree 2-3tbsp maple syrup 1tsp garlic powder 1tsp onion powder 1/2tsp salt Water to thin, if necessary For the cheesy mustard mayo: 1tsp Dijon mustard 1tbsp tahini 1tbsp maple syrup 2tsp nutritional yeast 1tsp onion powder 3-4tbsp hot water (to reach your desired consistency) 1/8tsp salt For the hot dogs: 2-3 vegan sausages 1/2 red onion, sliced

1-2tbsp oil, for frying 2-3 hot dog buns Salt and pepper, to taste Sesame seeds Method Prepare the sauces by mixing each separately in a bowl and storing in resealable plastic bags.

Set aside.

In a large frying pan, fry the vegan sausages and red onion in a little oil until the sausages are browned and crispy on all sides and the onions are crispy. Drain on a paper towel. Warm the buns in the oven or microwave.

To assemble the hot dogs, cut a slice down the centre of the hot dog bun with a bread knife (ensure you do not cut all the way through).

To apply the sauces, simply slice a small corner off the resealable plastic bags with scissors and squeeze as you would with a piping bag.

Spread a thin layer of sweet chilli sauce inside the bun and then insert the vegan sausage. Sprinkle with sesame seeds. Top with onion, salt and pepper and finish with a drizzle of both the sweet chilli sauce and cheesy mustard mayo.

GL, March 9, 2017

Beautifully Real Food: GuiltFree, Meat-Free Recipes To Indulge In by Sam Murphy out now priced £16.99

For the baked beans: 2tsp coconut oil 1 red onion, finely diced 1 garlic clove, minced 1 × 400g can haricot beans, rinsed and drained 1tsp ground turmeric 1tsp ground cumin 1/4tsp ground nutmeg 1tbsp coconut sugar (available from Tesco or Ocado) 1-2tsp vegetable bouillon or paste 125ml tomato puree 1/2 a 400g can chopped tomatoes 1tbsp coconut cream Salt and pepper, to taste Sauteed greens and mushrooms, to serve Method: Prepare the hash by chopping the potatoes and boiling until tender. Remove from heat and rinse in water.

In a non-stick frying pan, simply fry the potatoes with the vegan butter over a medium heat until the potatoes are slightly crispy and broken up.

For the baked beans, heat up the coconut oil in a nonstick frying pan and saute the onion and garlic until fragrant and browned.

Add the beans, spices, coconut sugar, vegetable bouillon, tomato puree and canned tomatoes. Simmer for five to six minutes over a medium heat.

Add the coconut cream and stir in. Remove from the heat and serve. Season to taste and serve with sauteed greens and mushrooms.

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FIVE O’CLOCK SOMEWHERE

RECIPE

Here’s a selection of wines ideal for celebrating pie week

CHICKEN AND MUSHROOM PIE

STEAK AND KIDNEY PIE

BEEF, MUSHROOM AND RED WINE PIE

SLOW-COOKED LAMB PIE

For white meat in a creamy sauce, try a lightly oaked chardonnay such as Parker Williams Vineyard Chardonnay 2016, Coonawarra, Australia (£12.99, www. virginwines.co.uk). This sleek white from one of the region’s top estates has classic aromas and flavours of citrus, ripe pear and peach with a flick of vanilla and a lengthy finish - balanced, bright and full of verve.

A versatile red from northern Italy, Truly Irresistible Barbera D’Asti 2012, Italy (£6.99, The Co-operative) deftly mixes rich black cherry notes with ripe plums and spice that contrasts well against an earthy, savoury forest floor. An unbeatable price and match with the meaty gravy of the sauce.

A real crowd pleaser, once you’ve tasted Mount Rozier The Beekeeper Merlot 2015, South Africa (£7.99, The Co-operative), there might be just enough left over to make the sauce.

A rich, smooth, fruity red that pulls all the right taste-strings, plummy dark fruits are laced with smoke and spice.

To discover the Jumilla wine route in south east Spain, try El Mayoral Monastrell Petit Verdot, Jumilla, Spain (£6.99, Aldi). A blend of monastrell and petit verdot grapes, it offers sun- drenched cherry fruits with hints of blackberries steeped in liquorice and spice.

Whether you’re a novice wine drinker or connoisseur, there’s enough depth to be interesting.

& for dessert COOKIES & CREAM SMOOTHIE (Makes 1 smoothie) For the ‘cookie’ pieces: 65g almonds 2tbsp cacao powder (available from health food shops and Amazon) 20g desiccated coconut 115g Medjool dates, pitted For the creamy smoothie: 2 frozen bananas, broken into chunks 125ml coconut cream 250ml almond milk 2tsp vanilla bean powder (available from Amazon and

2tbsp maple syrup or rice malt syrup Method Firstly, you want to prepare your cookie pieces by pulsing the almonds, cacao powder and coconut in a high-speed blender or food processor until a fine meal forms.

Add the dates last and pulse until it begins to stick together. Set aside in a bowl.

To make the smoothie, simply blend the bananas, coconut cream, almond milk, vanilla and

maple syrup in a high-speed blender until creamy. Adjust the liquid as needed.

Break the cookie pieces into small chunks and add to the blender again. Pulse the smoothie a few times to break the pieces up a little more.

Pour into your favourite glass jar and serve at once.

Beautifully Real Food: Guilt-Free, Meat-Free Recipes To Indulge In

by Sam Murphy is published by Blink Publishing on February 23, priced £16.99

GL, March 9, 2017

INTERVIEW

JESS BRITTAIN’S ALREADY WRITTEN FOR THE SEMINAL SERIES SKINS AND NOW DEBUTS HER OWN SHOW, CLIQUE. SHE TALKS ABOUT THE EVENTS IN HER LIFE THAT INSPIRED THE STORY, AND GIVES ADVICE TO NEW SCREENWRITERS

05

FIVE MINUTES WITH

JESS BRITTAIN

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE CLIQUE? Clique is about a best friendship in crisis, framed by the wider insecurity of being a young woman starting university in a pressurised and uncertain time. It is about an alluring group of women and their charismatic leader, who all seem to have worked out what they’re doing and the ways in which our protagonists respond differently to that group. Clique takes an issue that’s pretty ubiquitous to young women and places it in a thriller setting. The stakes are high and it goes to some pretty dark places.

become even worse. There’s no space to drift, make mistakes and learn things about yourself.

You are expected to immediately operate with an adult sensibility.

I was interested in what that might mean for women who perhaps weren’t quite ready for the stakes they were expected to deal with. I’m also just endlessly fascinated by female friendship and the centrality it has in a young woman’s life. It means everything and can go so wrong so quickly.

The opportunity to write something with an almost entirely female cast was also very appealing.

WHAT WAS YOUR INSPIRATION FOR THE SERIES?

WHAT CAN YOU TELL US ABOUT THE CHARACTERS?

It started with having a slightly weird and discombobulated time at university myself. We’re repeatedly told as teens that uni will be the best years of our lives.

So when you find yourself lost and wrong-footed, it’s almost shameful.

You are supposed to find “your people” at uni. The attraction of those who seem to have it all tied down and the feelings that then throws up, is something that has hung around in my head

HAVE YOU FELT MORE COMFORTABLE SINCE YOU LEFT?

Lots of the characters started out as versions of me, my friends and our experiences. Holly [Synnove Karlsen] and Georgia [Aisling Franciosi] take parts from most of my closest female friendships and I think everyone has an inner Elizabeth [Sorcha Groundsell].

Jude [Louise Brealey] was partly inspired by a secondary school English teacher of mine, who I simultaneously hated and was desperate to please. But the characters quickly took on lives of their own once I was writing and then developed again once they were cast.

In the six years since I graduated, the pressure seems to have

WAS IT A LONG JOURNEY

The cast of Clique which is screening on iPlayer

FROM CONCEPT TO FILMING? It took some time. The concept and pilot script happened quite quickly. Then there was a wait to see if we could get it off the ground. I think in some ways it was a slightly risky commission. The show is for young people, but is quite explicit and dark. And it was my first sole-authored show. We were lucky that BBC Three was committed to backing what we wanted to do and were willing to take the risk.

WHAT DO YOU HOPE PEOPLE WILL TAKE AWAY FROM THE SHOW? Mostly I just hope it is fun to watch.

Writing for young people is liberating because they are an audience who will come with you if you try something a bit different - as long as it’s good! I’d hope that even if this particular uni experience doesn’t quite reflect your own, the challenges and themes will resonate with young people generally, and young women in particular.

WERE YOU ALWAYS INTENT ON WRITING FOR TELEVISION? I studied English Lit at university for no better reason than I liked reading. I realised after a creative writing module that writing was probably what I wanted to do but, again, was slightly directionless in that aim. I come from a family of

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screenwriters who were writing Skins at the time and my Dad put my uni creative writing piece in with the samples being considered for a Skins tie-in novel.

Whilst researching the novel in the Skins Writers Room, I failed to sit quietly and listen and the producer Neil Duncan noticed some potential. It was probably just about the only Writers Room at the time where clueless, green writers had a safe space to learn how to write a screenplay with close but non-prescriptive support.

I was very, very lucky to have been part of it.

WHAT ADVICE CAN YOU SHARE WITH BURGEONING TV WRITERS? Don’t try to be perfect in your writing. Don’t plan a script to death. If you’re writing about something that fires you up, it’ll show - regardless of whether your structure is perfect or your action sequence makes total sense. And don’t be afraid to give yourself time to think and let ideas swirl around without writing. Sometimes you do your best work walking to the shop or hanging out your washing.

BBC THREE’S CLIQUE IS AVAILABLE ON BBC IPLAYER FROM SUNDAY, MARCH 5

COLUMNIST

Jane Dyer FROM NUISANCE TAGGING TO HISTORIC STREET ART,THIS WEEK JANE DISCOVERS HOW GRAFFITI IS BEING PAINTED IN A POSITIVE LIGHT Stuart McLain runs Hype Street Art

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recently visited Belfast - with the intention of researching family history but the part of our trip that left the deepest impression was the city’s magnificent street art. Through alleyways, down backstreets, hidden in alcoves are the most breathtaking pieces of artwork.

It isn’t the first time I’ve held up a family trip to capture graffiti on my iPhone. I was similarly enamoured with the wall art of Lisbon - huge masterpieces that spanned not just the boarding of building sites but entire buildings. I’d never seen anything like it.

On my return from Belfast I did some research. The artwork I’d seen wasn’t just the product of a few youths with some spray cans it is a visual narrative of the history of the city. During The Troubles the walls of the divided city became a two-dimensional war zone; a form of communication for both sides. More recent artwork depicts the modern history of Belfast - celebrating its heroes as well as events of the past.

I don’t have to travel far to quench

my thirst for modern art. I have been known to photograph work signed by the artist Trix, particularly impressed by the huge depiction of Sherlock Holmes that was, for a time, emblazoned on a wall near Blackfriars.

I wandered through Gloucester a few days ago and in Greyfriars I discovered new splashes of colour brightening up the dowdy boards opposite Eastgate Market.

The recent increase in wall art in Gloucester in particular has been encouraged by Stuart McLain who runs Hype Street Art - a co-operative established in an attempt to harness the talent of graffiti artists such as Trix and Flava - names that passers-by might miss if they don’t pause long enough to admire the art above eye level.

Stuart says: “Graffiti is all about people expressing themselves. Some artists are anti-establishment - tagging and bombing on walls of companies they want to send a message to. And there has been tagging associated with gangs too. But people are afraid that encouraging legal street art

by allocating walls in the city for the artists to work on is going to lead to an increase in tagging and bombing. That’s just not the case.”

Tagging, I learnt, is word art - signing things off with a message - while Bombing is leaving art in unexpected and unpermitted places.

Guerrilla artists tend to get a buzz from hitting the highest, most difficult to reach places with their art. But Stuart recognised some years ago that these talented artists could be brought together for the good of the city.

He is passionate about how important art can be not only in telling community stories - as with the art in Belfast - but also for social good.

He recently painted an alley in Kingsholm, frequented by drug users and

GL, March 9, 2017

says the project, by throwing a multi-coloured spotlight on the area, succeeded in acting as a deterrent to the unwelcome guests and now visitors are, more commonly, people taking photos of the artwork.

He is also working with disengaged young people and says: “I had issues when I was younger.

I was angry. I found that I could literally ‘draw out’ my anger through my graffiti - I want other young people to experience the positive side of street art.”

Stuart surely paints a positive picture of the role of graffiti in Gloucester culture.

I HAD ISSUES WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. I WAS ANGRY. I FOUND THAT I COULD ‘DRAW OUT’ MY ANGER THROUGH MY GRAFFITI - I WANT PEOPLE TO EXPERIENCE THE POSITIVE SIDE OF STREET ART

FOLLOW JANE ON TWITTER @MARKETINGJD OR VISIT MARKETINGJD.CO.UK

HEALTH

LONELINESS IS EXPERIENCED BY MANY PEOPLE AS THEY GET OLDER, AND FOR THOSE LIVING WITH DEMENTIA, THAT FEELING OF ISOLATION CAN BE EVEN WORSE. RESEARCH

BY THE ALZHEIMER’S SOCIETY HAS FOUND NEARLY TWO-THIRDS (63%) OF PEOPLE WITH DEMENTIA WHO LIVE ALONE ARE LONELY, AND A SIMILAR PROPORTION FEEL ANXIOUS OR DEPRESSED. BUT IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THAT WAY - AND CHANCES ARE, YOU CAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Can you help someone feel a little less

LITTLE TIME, BIG DIFFERENCE As little as a few minutes, whenever you can fit it in, can make an enormous difference to a person with dementia, and that’s why the Alzheimer’s Society is trying to recruit as many volunteers as possible to its burgeoning Side by Side campaign, which pairs volunteers and people with dementia based on shared interests.

Kathryn Smith, Alzheimer’s Society’s director of operations, is a Side

by Side volunteer herself. “Loneliness is a real problem for people with dementia, yet we know that one of the most important things for those affected is to remain part of their community and continue to do the things they love - from going shopping to enjoying a football match,” she says.

“Side by Side, offering one-to-one support, is a vital step to making this a reality.”

Smith points out that, in the UK, around 225,000 in will develop the condition this year, and 850,000 are currently living with dementia - a figure that’s set to rise to one million by 2021. “So it’s vital we all unite and do what we can to make a meaningful difference,” she stresses.

only leaving the house once a month.

That’s where Side by Side can make a real difference. The initiative isn’t asking volunteers to give huge chunks of their time, just as much as they can spare occasionally, to simply accompany a person with dementia to something they’d like to do - this could mean going to a football match or a local garden centre with them, strolling in the park, keeping them company while going shopping or attending appointments, or simply having a chat over a cup of tea, or even on the phone (the scheme is also looking for volunteers just to ring people with dementia and chat with them).

Smith was paired with a woman who loved to go out for lunch, which is what they did together, and has also been matched with a man who likes horses; Smith rides so the two immediately had a shared interest.

“Sometimes he might not want to go out at all, he might just want some company, and that’s fine,” she says.

“Loneliness is one of the biggest problems for people with dementia, and we’ve got a big list of people waiting to be matched up with volunteers.”

LOST FRIENDS The campaign was first piloted in 2014, after research found people with dementia were more at risk of loneliness. A third said they’d lost friends since their diagnosis, and a few didn’t even tell friends they had dementia.

And while two-thirds of people with dementia still live in the community, many feel trapped in their own homes, with almost one in 10

MUTUAL SUPPORT Side by Side is currently available in 29 locations nationwide, and it’s hoped the scheme will have been rolled out further by the end of the year, as it now has a waiting list of almost 2,000 people with dementia.

The Alzheimer’s Society provides volunteers, who must be over 18 and undergo a criminal records check, with online training to give them a basic awareness of dementia,

L O N

MEETING WINNIE WAS A BREATH OF FRESH AIR; WE CLICKED FROM THE START AND HAVE HAD SOME GREAT DAYS OUT ROAMING AROUND CHARITY SHOPS AND HAVING CUPS OF TEA AND CAKE.

GL, March 9, 2017

plus things like health and safety. A ‘matching meeting’ is then held with the volunteer, the person they’ve been paired with and their family, and a Side by Side coordinator.

“We make sure you’re going to hit it off,” says Smith, “and if you don’t, it’s perfectly fine for either person to say they don’t think the match will work and can they try someone else - although I don’t think that’s happened yet.

“Even if you’ve only got half an hour available once a month, there’ll be somebody you can support with that. Or if there’s something you already like doing, like going for a walk in the park, just take the person you’re matched with too. Some real

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E L Y ?

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CLIPPER CHAMOMILE TEA, £1.39 (HOLLAND & BARRETT) Popping the kettle on is an ideal way to grab a moment's calm, and chamomile is one of the most soothing essences you'll find. Sip at any time of the day to feel those tensions ease.

friendships are being built through this.”

WE LOVE IT! Current Side by Side volunteers have said they’ve gained and shared skills, developed new friendships and even enhanced their CV by taking part in the scheme.

Irene Woodward, 66, who has dementia and lives in Leicester, says since meeting Side by Side volunteer Winnie Horton, her life has changed for the better.

“I was at a low point when I first met Winnie - my partner had died and then I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Meeting Winnie was a breath of fresh air; we clicked from the start

and have had some great days out roaming around charity shops and having cups of tea and cake. Without sounding pleased about my condition, I want to enjoy this stage of Alzheimer’s as much as I can. My father had dementia, so I’m aware of what might be ahead, but my attitude is that life is precious and still worth living.”

Fiona Phillips, broadcaster and Alzheimer’s Society ambassador, was recently paired with Irene too, because they share a love of football.

“Both my parents had dementia, and I wish a service like Side by Side had been in place for my mum and dad,” says Phillips.

“Just because someone has dementia, doesn’t mean they can’t keep do-

ing the things they enjoy - they may just need a little support.

“It was wonderful spending the day with Irene and sharing our passion for football by watching our rival teams - Leicester City and Chelsea - play at the King Power Stadium. We had so many laughs together and it was inspiring to witness first-hand what a difference Side by Side volunteers can make to people living with dementia.”

TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT VOLUNTEERING FOR SIDE BY SIDE, VISIT WWW. ALZHEIMERS.ORG.UK OR CALL 0330 333 0804. FOR THE ALZHEIMER’S SOCIETY NATIONAL DEMENTIA HELPLINE, CALL 0300 222 1122.

GL, March 9, 2017

WELEDA LAVENDER BODY WASH, £7.95 (WELEDA. CO.UK) No time for a soak in the tub?

Wash away the stresses of the day with a quick shower with this creamy body wash, made with lavender essential oil and skin-pampering sesame oil.

TELEVISION

IT’S ALL EYES ON STEFANIE MARTINI AS SHE PREPARES TO TAKE THE LEAD IN PRIME SUSPECT 1973, BUT THE ACTRESS IS HOPEFUL HER DEPICTION OF JANE TENNISON WILL BE JUDGED ON ITS OWN MERIT. SHE TELLS GEMMA DUNN OF HER JOY AT LANDING THE ICONIC ROLE

I CAN’T CRUMBLE UNDER PRESSURE

F

ollowing in Dame Helen Mirren’s footsteps was never going to be an easy feat, but rising star Stefanie Martini is determined to make her own tracks in ITV’s hottest new prequel, Prime Suspect 1973.

The British actress is set to play Mirren’s famous character, WPC Jane Tennison, in the new six-part crime drama. But in a twist to the original adaptation (Prime Suspect - based on Lynda La Plante’s bestselling novel, Tennison - ran from 1991 to 2006), this series will rewind to the Seventies to chart the police officer at the beginning of her career, revealing how she became such a complex and formidable character in the Metropolitan Police.

UNDER PRESSURE With much anticipation for its revival, Martini confesses to feeling the pressure once she sat down to rewatch the original hit.

“Only then, it slowly dawned on me what a big deal it was,” confides the 26-year-old, who joins forces with the likes of Sam Reid (The Riot Club) and Blake Harrison (The Inbetweeners).

“But I also think it’s very different,” she adds. “I have to see it as a separate thing. I have to appreciate it and take what I can from [Mirren’s] performance and the research I did,

but then I also have to let that go and treat it as my own interpretation. “[I can’t] crumble under that pressure or see it as something bigger than me.”

That’s not to say she didn’t welcome a blessing from the Oscar-winner, however.

“I think she released a statement saying it’s really great that it’s going again, because it’s good for young women to see what it was like in that time,” recalls Martini. “So although she doesn’t really have anything to do with it, it’s nice to know she supports it, for sure.”

SEXISM SHOCK Playing the young recruit at a time when woman police constables were slowly being integrated into the force, Martini admits to, at first, being shocked at the blatant sexism in the workplace.

“Back then, that was just what happened and people just accepted that that was a woman’s place,” she reasons, crediting the show’s script for including “snippets of it”.

“Whereas today, if anyone I knew was like, ‘Oi you, make the tea’, I would be like ‘Sorry? You do that’, or if they expected you to do their ironing or something, it would be ridiculous,” notes the Somerset-born star.

“But there’s also a lot of parallels with today; there’s a lot of everyday

sexism that happens in different ways - how women are looked at and not taken seriously in the workplace.

“They might not be as obvious,” she reasons, “But they’re still there.”

MAKING AN IMPACT Referencing this year’s politically-heavy Golden Globe speeches and the worldwide Women’s March, which took place the day after US president Donald Trump was inaugurated, Martini insists she’s pleased to be coming into the industry with her eyes wide open.

“It’s a difficult situation, obviously, with everything going on politically,” she begins, “But it’s great to see so many women - and actually men as well - unite across the world. So many people to say, ‘Look this is wrong’.

“I think it’s very important to use what’s going on in real life to inform your work and, I mean, who knows if what I’ve done, or the show that we have made, will have an impact on that at all,” she muses, “but it’s a good thing to explore.”

MORE THAN SKIN-DEEP Having graduated from RADA less than two years ago, Martini’s talent and progressive drive - has certainly turned industry heads.

The relative newcomer has already impressed in her breakout role as heroine Mary Thorne in Julian Fellowes’

GL, March 9, 2017

Dr Thorne; is currently storming US audiences as Lady Ev in NBC’s apocalyptic Wizard Of Oz reboot, Emerald City; and has filmed her part of Sophia de Haviland in the upcoming film adaptation of Agatha Christie’s Crooked House.

“It’s all gone very fast for me and only now I’m able to sit back and look at what’s happened,” she explains.

Newbie or not, she’s a performer who knows what she wants and that’s undoubtedly a role with substance.

“It’s really nice to play a girl, where, if she looks pretty or whatever, it’s got nothing to do with what she’s trying to do,” Martini says in reference to Tennison, who, at 22, shares the same burning ambition to succeed professionally.

“I honestly don’t think I’m very good at playing the girlfriend role; I get bored,” she elaborates. “I much prefer character parts that could stand alone without the man - a woman doesn’t necessarily have to be strong to be that kind of woman either.

“I’m not interested in just being something for people to look at,” she says passionately. “I get excited by projects if there’s depth to the character and things to explore that are interesting and different from character to character.”

PRIME SUSPECT 1973 STARTS ON ITV ON THURSDAY, MARCH 2

ABSURD BIRD | BE AT ONE | THE BERTINET BAKERY | CAFFÈ NERO | CAKE CAFE | COMPTOIR LIBANAIS | THE COSY CLUB | CAFÈ AT DEBENHAMS | GIRAFFE | GOURMET BURGER KITCHEN | GRAZE | GRILL STOCK | HOTEL CHOCOLAT | JIMMY’S | JUNO | KRISPY KREME | MOKOKO | NANDO’S | PIZZA EXPRESS | PRET | PREZZO | THAIKHUN

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From the sublime soul food of America’s Deep South to wonderful Lebanese cuisine and the amazing authentic flavours of Thailand… you can taste the world without leaving Bath.

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Gourmet food to dine for.

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INTERIORS

THE RULE OF FINDING YOUR WAY TO A SUCCESSFUL STYLE CAN BE A TRICKY JOURNEY, AND ONLY A LUCKY FEW CAN AFFORD TO HIRE AN INTERIOR DESIGNER TO DO THE JOB FOR THEM. BUT FEAR NOT, BECAUSE WE’VE ASKED THREE EXPERTS TO REVEAL THEIR INSIDER SECRETS, SO YOU CAN CREATE ROOMS THAT STUN THIS YEAR...

WINNING DESIGN Daniela Tasca York, 31, was recently named this year's winner of BBC Two's The Great British Design Challenge. The mother-oftwo's now running her own interiors business, with a range of wallpaper and accessories (www.danielatascayork.co.uk).

MY STYLE: "I'd describe it as modernist, clean and uncluttered but luxurious. I always add a touch of humour, with poster art or unusual touches; my most treasured piece is a massive buffalo skull!"

MY HOME: "In our last home, I worked a Mediterranean vibe; very white, clean and minimal with art everywhere. Our open plan living room featured mid-century and reclaimed furniture, and I ramped up the feeling of space with one wall of floor-toceiling mirrors, and on the opposite wall, fitted cup-

boards clad in wood strips to resemble panelling. A gold leaf effect in the hall added a dazzling, shimmering effect."

TREND FORECAST: "We've waved goodbye to that harsh industrial look, and instead Eighties style - all fun, freedom and a rock 'n' roll attitude to colour, pattern and effects, using vibrant, bubblegum shades - will make an impact.

The approach will be more luxe than in the past and will feature beautiful finishes and materials, such as marbles and metallics, as well as plush fabrics like velvets.

MY ADVICE: "Be brave if you want to be your own interior designer. Feel free to experiment, and inspiration can come from films, books, exhibitions and holidays. If you want to step into summer fast, embrace 'tropical' with masses of leaf palm prints, which have taken the

GL, March 9, 2017

high street by storm."

MOOD MAKER Designer Abigail Ahern is renowned for her trademark dark, moody colour palette and glamorous settings.

MY STYLE: "Generally it's quite masculine - I'm not a feminine type - and it's also glamorous, layered and edgy, as opposed to pretty. I take inspiration from a range of different styles, so its eclectic."

MY HOME: "My whole house is painted in dark shades, from black to midnight blue and my colour-ofthe-moment from my range, Madison Grey, a swampy rainforest colour with undertones of green. Conventional wisdom dictates you should have one focal point, but I have at least three or four and create them by using a couple of oversized objects, like lamps, a collection of cush-

Zebra cushion, £6, from George Home; Stitched velvet cushion, chartreuse, £25, available from Marks and Spencer; Pattern vase, £15, from George Home

OUR CHOICES OFFICE CHIC

ORIENT EXPRESS

Black Lacquer Horn Chair, £495, available from Orchid Abigal Ahern’s Tribal Collection (L-R) Cushion, £32; Zebra cushion, £42; Pom Pom cushion, £28, all from Debenhams

ions or a mantel arrangement, so when people walk in, they can't work out the room instantly.

That makes a space surprising, intriguing and exciting.

"I use different textures in rooms in the same way I use herbs and spices for cooking, as they make everything look more luxurious than it is. Lighting is fundamental to a successful home; I have five chandeliers and one in the garden."

TREND FORECAST: "A strong tribal trend's on its way, which is reflected in my new collection for Debenhams (www.debenhams.com, prices start from £20), inspired by Africa's colours and patterns. It's textural, with splashes of colour and features exotic animals. All things artisanal will be huge this year, whether that's beautifully carved furniture, giant handmade urns, or woven textiles. We're living in

Draco red dragon ceramic table lamp, £336, available from Artisanti

I THINK THERE'LL BE A GROWING AWARENESS ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF HOW OUR SPACES SUIT US AND ENHANCE OUR LIVES exciting times in interiors, because people are embracing the transformative power of colour and are prepared to take more risks with their spaces."

MY ADVICE: "I believe in anarchy and not following the rules. It's all about enjoying yourself, letting your rooms 'wear' your favourite colours, in the same way you wear clothes in your favourite shades, because they make you feel good.

Follow that and the effect will be edgier, cool, playful and a world away from a bland setting which looks like 'decorating by numbers'."

NATURAL HARMONY Designer Oliver Heath, who first found fame in BBC's Changing Rooms in the late-Nineties, is an expert in sustainable architecture and interior design.

MY STYLE: "I take a human-centred approach to design and focus on how the spaces where we live and work can benefit the way we feel. Spaces affect our mood, behaviour and energy levels, so I look to use design to enhance and improve our health and wellbeing."

MY HOME: "I'm much more concerned about the way the space makes me and the family feel, rath-

GL, March 9, 2017

er than how it looks. We've refurbished our Sixties house in Brighton so that it's completely eco-friendly. Throughout, we have warm, cosy, social spaces and the heart of our home is our dining area in the middle of our open-plan living room. The natural materials throughout help us connect with nature, so lots of wood panelling and brushed oak flooring.

"Maximising light's so important because it influences mood, and we have huge picture windows, sliding doors to a garden, and blinds and curtains from Hillarys (www.hillarys.co.uk) to control light and minimise heat loss."

TREND FORECAST: "I think there'll be a growing awareness about the importance of how our spaces suit us and enhance our lives. In my bedroom at home, I've used an Icelandic shelter look - the Scandinavian trend is so strong - which is simple and conjures a rich, warming, sensory feel for a space that's like a big warm hug.

Homes should always cosset and comfort us."

MY ADVICE: "We live such fast-moving, technology-filled, stressful lives that many of us have lost sight of the things which make us feel good, happy and healthy. Instead, we should be inspired by those things and organise our spaces so we connect, whether that's opening up a room into a garden, creating somewhere the family can easily gather, or using materials and textures which help conjure different moods."

INTERIORS

A ¿ QUEST ON OF

e t s ta NEUTRALS HAVE HAD THEIR MOMENT AND NOW IT’S TIME TO BE BRAVE AND BOLD. TAKE INSPIRATION FROM NATURE, INDUSTRIAL SPACES AND MOODS AND THEME YOUR HOME SPECIAL.

I

t's easy to follow the crowd in interiors, and play it safe with decor that looks the business but doesn't really excite.

If you're yearning to break loose and willing to experiment, however, there are some terrific trends this year. You could be adventurous and go a little wild - Africa's the hot destination influencing our taste for 2017 - or stay cool and dip into blues,

which have the power to transform any space. If that doesn't float your boat, go tactile and embrace 'touch me' textures. Don't feel restricted to strictly replicating one look either; it's actually more fun to make a style your own by using elements from each in a unique mix.

There are no rules - after all, it's your home, and you'll enjoy it more if it really reflects your taste...

NATURE, BOY

Exploring the world through our homes is all the rage this year.

Africa's currently the favourite decor destination, and its signature palette of warm earthy shades works so well with pared-back contemporary interiors. "This is a modern style inspired by a global tradition. Our Tribe collection draws inspiration from key elements of modern African design, from bold prints to intricate embroidery and ornate carvings," says Sue Roberts, design director at House of Fraser.

DECOR TIP: Go wild with bold jungle prints, or tame it down with a subtle approach to a colour scheme and choose a palette of dusky browns, luscious greens and rusty oranges reminiscent of an African savannah.

GET THE LOOK: House of Fraser's grey and white Linea Tribe Print Duvet Set, £50, would be well complemented by an Illini Geo Bedspread, £150, and a monochrome

GL, March 9, 2017

Zebra cushion, £6, from George Home; Stitched velvet cushion, chartreuse, £25, available from Marks and Spencer; Pattern vase, £15, from George Home

TOUCHY FEELY

Texture is the buzzword for interiors in 2017, and it's all about mixing matt finishes with gloss, and rough-hewn with sleek, streamlined pieces.

"This year, the emphasis within people's homes will be on on an intensely natural environment.

Textures and tones will reflect the beauty of nature, with a few modern touches thrown in for emphasis," says Stacey Sibley, creative director at Alexander James Interior Design.

"Think rough, natural woods for everything from floorboards to tables to shutters, textured glass and ceramics for lighting, and then accessorise with matte glazed dinnerware, wooden servingware and earthenware bowls.

"A soft palette of greys, light browns and whites tinged with pink will complement a scheme which celebrates the grain of wood and stone and the beauty of craftsmanship."

DECOR TIP: Graphic art, whose themes focus on nature's textures - from blades of grass to pebbles - is another way to embrace this look.

GET THE LOOK: Make a feature of a bespoke piece from Titchmarsh & Goodwin, such as an English Oak Console Table, with brass handles, which starts from £1,620. Freestanding, distinctive pieces suit this unstructured informal style, and a bleached mango wood and antique brass-plated iron frame Chevron Shelving Unit (which would make a striking room divider), £449, is a gem from Atkin & Thyme.

Details really count for this style, so shop around for treats at Marks & Spencer, which is on top of all the trends this season. Their Short Hammered Vase, £19.50, has a lovely metallic sheen, and I love their chartreuse Stitched Velvet Cushion, £25. Go rustic with a Triple Hurricane Lantern, £15, Dunelm.

MOODY BLUES

Blues still rule in interiors, despite competition from green, the hot newcomer making its name on the decor block.

"Blues are making another comeback this season, with the resurgence of beautiful cobalt and azure shades, paired with glamorous metallic accents for a bold luxe look," says Paula Taylor, colour and trends specialist at Graham & Brown.

"They're so versatile and easy on the eye and suit any look, from traditional to ultra modern.

For a more subtle refresh, mix with bright whites and hints of red or green for a spring update.

Designer Kelly Hoppen's Ikat wallpaper [£23 a roll], in a vivid Prussian blue, is perfect for a classic style statement and works with both neutral shades as well as a richer colour palette."

DECOR TIP: Dulux's Colour of the Year is a greeny ocean blue, Denim Drift: Easycare Matt Emulsion, £26.48 for 2.5L. GET THE LOOK: Designer's Guild Majolica wallpaper, in arabesque cobalt, £195 a roll, is stunning, with a design which cleverly combines a painterly technique with a tile effect.

Gatsby furniture from Next, upholstered in gorgeous dark teal matt velvet, has a fashionable modern luxe look but a highly affordable price tag, with a sofa starting from

OUR CHOICES URBAN JUNGLE

GOLD GLAMOUR

Amber chair, in Nyanga, tan, £599, available from Marks and Spencer

Short hammered vase, gold, £19.50, available from Marks and Spencer

GL, March 9, 2017

MOODY BLUES

Ceramic patchwork vase, £20, available from Next

TOYS

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GARDENING

AWARD-WINNING GARDEN DESIGNER TOM MASSEY TELLS HANNAH STEPHENSON HOW GARDEN COLOUR CAN ALTER YOUR MOOD, EASE NEGATIVE EMOTIONS AND LIFT SPIRITS

COLOUR YOUR MOOD A

spiral of colour is the theme top designer Tom Massey has taken on in his latest show garden which displays the way gardens can enhance your mood and help your wellbeing.

Research shows the therapeutic value and feeling of wellbeing that people get from gardening, according to Thrive, the charity that uses gardening to help people living with disabilities or ill health, or are vulnerable or isolated. But colour can also make an impact.

Massey, 31, was inspired by zen gardens and Japanese designs to come up with his Perennial Sanctuary Garden - to be shown at the RHS Hampton Court Flower Show in July - and has done much research on how the colour and form of plants can change your mood.

At the outer edge of his showpiece, the vibrant red colours represent the inner chaos that can come from being at crisis point. As the visitor takes the journey into the garden following a winding gravel path, sounds from outside the garden fade.

The planting becomes taller and more immersive and the colour scheme moves through stimulating yellows and oranges to more restful purples, blues and finally, pure green.

Garden notes

Towards the middle of the design the planting is simplified, leading to a calm sanctuary at the centre of the garden. Here the planting changes to a single species of towering bamboo that screens the outside world, creating a safe haven and place for peaceful reflection, hidden from view.

But you don’t have to create a show garden to generate a positive atmosphere in your outside space. The use of a particular palette to generate a

mood can be replicated in many gardens, Massey explains.

“Red is a very stimulating colour it’s eye-catching, it can mean passion, danger and warning, but ultimately it’s an exciting colour,” says Massey, who uses Sanguisorba ‘Tanna’, Crocosmia ‘Hellfire’ and Panicum virgatum ‘Shenandoah’ to energise and uplift in his own show garden. “Red comes to the fore if you want a vibrant bed.” Orange hues spark enthu-

BEST OF THE BUNCH DWARF IRIS The miniature rockery iris, I. reticulata, grows to just 10cm and brightens up scree beds and containers, its flowers in shades of blue with yellow inner markings or orange splashes, emerging before the grassy tufts of leaves around 30cm high. Plant the bulbs at twice their own depth in late autumn in a well-drained, sunny spot, adding grit to the soil to help drainage. Good varieties include I. ‘Harmony’, which bears deep velvety blue flowers with yellow lines, and ‘Blue Note’, which is violet blue with feather white markings. I. ‘Katharine Hodgkin’ is another to look out for, with its light blue flowers with rich yellow tongues and a maroon fleck.

GL, March 9, 2017

siasm, fascination, happiness and creativity, combining the energy of red and the happiness of yellow. If you prefer an orange palette, you might try Achillea millefolium ‘Terracotta’ and Kniphofia uvaria ‘Nobilis’.

Yellow is the colour of sunshine, associated with joy, happiness and intellect and produces a warming effect, arousing cheerfulness and stimulating mental activity, says Massey.

It’s an optimistic, positive colour and

Above, award-winning garden designer Tom Massey. Below, Uan illustration of the Perennial Sanctuary Garden, designed by Tom around his “spiral of colour” theme

plants in this band include Helianthus annuus and Inula helenium.

Purple is associated with wisdom and dignity. Plants in this band include Veronicastrum virginicum ‘Fascination’ and Miscanthus ‘Purpurascens’. Lilac and lavender shades also have a restful quality.

Blue is often associated with depth and stability, symbolising trust, loyalty, wisdom, confidence and calm.

Plants in this band include Panicum

GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT EARLY VEG IN THE GREENHOUSE If you want to steal a march on summer, start sowing some delicious crops in your soil border in your greenhouse now and you should be harvesting them long before some of your neighbours. You shouldn’t go far wrong if you sow produce which is going to remain under cover thoughout its life. Vegetables such as French beans, carrots and baby beetroot are great for this and you’ll be harvesting them much earlier than you would outside. Check on the

seed packet that you have a greenhouse variety.

With climbing beans, sow two bean seeds per pot and place them on greenhouse staging in a frost-free greenhouse. When they have filled their pots with roots, plant them 20cm apart in the greenhouse border enriched with organic matter and put in a stake between each plant.

Make sure you save space for later crops such as tomatoes, which can be planted in late April or May. Baby root vegetables and salad crops including radishes, spinach and lettuce, can also be sown thinly in the greenhouse border.

GL, March 9, 2017

virgatum ‘Heavy Metal’ and Phlox ‘Blue Paradise’.

Bright colours tend to look more vibrant in sunny settings, while blue and green palettes can flourish in semi-shaded areas, creating a cool, calm atmosphere.At the centre of Massey’s garden, is the screen of towering bamboo.

“The colour palette is pure green, the colour of nature, representing growth, harmony, freshness, stability and endurance. Green has healing power, it is the most restful colour for the human eye and it has strong emotional correspondence with safety and sanctuary.

“Different forms and textures can be visually exciting and stimulating, but if you have one single species it can create a calming, restful environment.”

THE PERENNIAL SANCTUARY GARDEN WILL BE SHOWN AT THE RHS HAMPTON COURT FLOWER SHOW FROM JULY 3-9.

INTERVIEW

04

THE A-TEA Dualit Espress-auto 4 in 1 Coffee and Tea Machine 84516, £180, Amazon Take the strain out of big rounds by putting tech to work. Though pricey, this Dualit gadget can whip up a brew, as well as espressos, lattes and coffee orders. The tea function has a temperature gauge so you can reduce the heat to ensure infusions are at their best for that all-important first sip. There’s also a temperature boost function so tepid cups of tea are a thing of the past.

01

WATER GOOD IDEA Russell Hobbs 22851 Plastic Brita Kettle, £32.99, Argos Make your cuppa as fresh as possible by using a filter. This one

by Brita will sift your H2O through a hopper and into the kettle before boiling, to ensure a cleaner-tasting brew. If hot drinks aren’t to your liking, there’s nothing stopping you using the kettle to filter cold water as well.

06 TEA OF THE BEST FOR...

LOVERS

05

JUST MY CUP OF TEA Breville VKJ785 Multi Temperature Glass Kettle, £61.99, www.very.co.uk Whether it’s a green tea, a mint infusion or a builder’s brew, each variety of tea comes with an optimal temperature. To help you get the most out of your char, this kettle from Breville has five different temperature settings, also handy if you’re a coffee drinker too.

The glass kettle rests on the touch pad, which also doubles up as the dashboard, illuminating all your temperature options.

02

MAD HATTER’S TEA PARTY Sage by Heston Blumenthal the Tea Maker Kettle, Silver, £199, John Lewis This might be a whopping £199, but with the brains of everinventive chef Heston Blumenthal behind it, it might just be worth it. The motorised basket lowers leaves in and out of the water at the exact right time to ensure the optimum cup of Rosie. There are 15 customised settings and the option to vary the strength and temperature of your brew too.

WHETHER IT’S WITH TWO SUGARS, A DASH OF MILK OR A HERBAL INFUSION, HERE ARE SIX OF THE BEST GADGETS FOR BREWING UP, JUST IN TIME FOR DEMENTIA UK’S TIME FOR A CUPPA WEEK

03

APPY TEA TIME Smarter iKettle 2.0, £99.99, Maplin Stopping for a brew isn’t always convenient. At a film’s climax, pausing to switch the kettle on is an unnecessary diversion, likewise, lurching out of bed on a Saturday morning. But the problem is, the thirst for a comforting cuppa remains. This is where an iKettle comes good. Download the app and then flick the kettle on from anywhere in your house using your smartphone. You can also set the temperature of the kettle and have it notify you when it reaches the right point.

GL, March 9, 2017

06

STILL WATERS Dualit Classic Polished Kettle 1.7L - Rapid & Whisper Boil 72815, £129.99, Lakeland Gadgets with bells and whistles on them can be great - but actual noisy bells and whistles?

Less so. This is where this Dualit kettle comes into its own.

Awarded a Quiet Mark from the Noise Abatement Society, the kettle gently boils water without disturbing your ears, quietly clicking off when the water is ready. A cupful of water takes just 48 seconds to boil, promptly leading you to that restorative cuppa.

DIGITAL

JUST FYI

INSTAGRAM ADDS GALLERIES

Pete Souza photographs former president Obama, Princes William and George

SNAPPER’S DELIGHT Barack Obama’s White House photographer has been using his Instagram account to contrast President Donald Trump with his former boss - and people are delighted. Katie Wright puts Pete Souza in the frame

I

t started, innocently enough, with a picture of some curtains.

On January 21, the day after President Trump’s inauguration, when photos revealed the new incumbent of the Oval Office had installed golden drapes, former chief official White House photographer Pete Souza posted an image to his Instagram account showing the outgoing President with the caption: “I like these drapes better than the new ones.

Don’t you think?”

But over the next few weeks, the photographer’s choice of posts has become increasingly pointed.

When reports suggested President Trump had rowed on the phone with Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, Souza selected a snap of Obama joking around with Turnbull and the New Zealand PM. When Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto cancelled a meeting with Trump (and told the world on Twitter), he chose a shot of Obama tasting

tequila with his Mexican counterpart.

And when a video of Trump’s awkward first meeting with Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe, complete with death-grip handshake, induced cringes around the world, Souza shared a memory from a visit to Pearl Harbour, where Obama and Abe were all smiles.

Now, it’s clear the 62-year-old has been delving into his back catalogue on a regular basis to highlight the difference between the current and former residents of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue - and his one million followers are loving it.

“You’re a genius,” declares one comment. “Check out Obama’s photographer throwing epic shade at Trump,” reads another.

So why is he doing it?

Souza, who served his first stint in the White House during Ronald Reagan’s second term, then spent over a decade as a newspaper snapper, hasn’t commented directly, but has

left a few clues as to why he’s posting.

“I can’t comment publicly on politics. Although I really wish I could,” he told the British Journal of Photography in January.

And speaking to GQ in the States, he said: “I’ve tried to keep what I do non-political in the sense that you don’t ever see me make political comments. It’s always just trying to show the photo and maybe occasionally the back story of what happened.”

It seems that with his carefully-timed posts, the lensman has found a way to subtly critique the new President, while keeping the memory of Obama alive.

Whatever the reason, it’s very amusing to watch.

And with Trump’s gaffes-perweek combined with eight years of archives - Souza estimates he took about 2,000 photos a day - there are sure to be plenty more opportunities for subversive shots.

GL, March 9, 2017

You can now add up to 10 photos or videos in one Instagram post, creating a gallery for viewers to swipe through. To access the feature, make sure you’ve got the latest version of the app downloaded (version 10.9) by going to the App or Google Play stores. Then, when you hit the plus sign to add a new photo, there will be a ‘select multiple’ option in the bottom right hand corner. You can add photos or video taken with your phone’s camera or taken in Instagram, different filters can be applied to each picture in the gallery and you can drag and drop to change the order of the slideshow or delete them.

BORED? GRAB YOUR PHONE Boredom is a thing of the past, and we’ve got the internet to thank, according to a new survey. The poll of 2,000 adults, commissioned by gaming site Casumo. com, found that 80% of respondents are rarely or never bored, with 63% saying that it’s down to smartphones and the internet that they feel bored far less often than they were 20 years ago. It’s not all good news however, as the research confirmed that compulsive web browsing is zapping our attention spans: when reading articles online, it takes an average of just 47 seconds for our minds to wander.

TRAVEL

M

y heart is pounding as I shuffle towards the end of a narrow platform suspended 150 feet above the lush green canopy of Monteverde’s Cloud Forest.

Is it too late to chicken out, I wonder, as a long rope is attached to the harness around my waist and I feel my legs turn to jelly?

Clearly it is, because a gate is opening and I’m about to launch myself into the unknown...

How did I end up here?

Sandwiched between Nicaragua and Panama at the southern tip of Central America, Costa Rica has both Caribbean and Pacific coastlines butsunbathing isn’t what I’ve got in mind.

I’m here to indulge my adventurous side, baby-bungee jumping, zip-wiringand rafting through strikingly diverse landscapes.

Travelling as part of an organised tour, we first head to Manuel Antonio on the Pacific coast for a surfing lesson.

I’ve attempted this devilishly difficult sport once before, and strong waves mean my second stab isn’t any more accomplished.

I try to stand upright but crash onto the seafloor and am forced to limpout of the water, kneecap throbbing.

I’m tempted to give up there and then, but I persevere and within the hour I’m catching waves left, right and centre, and remain standing all the way to the shore.

As well as being a surfer’s paradise, Manuel Antonio is also famous for its national park, comprised of verdant forest, muddy mangroves and azure marine reserves.

You can follow the clearly mapped trails independently, but for wildlife spotting, a guide is recommended.

Without the expert eyes of Efrain, who grew up in the area before it was designated a national park, there’s no way I would have spotted the tiny orange arboreal crabs scuttling in the damp undergrowth, or the snoozing ‘perezoso’ hanging upside down from a leafy branch far above our heads.

Translated literally as ‘lazy bear’, this grey furball is one of the country’s famously sedentary mammalian residents, a two-toed sloth.

He looks soaking wet, like he’s just had a bath, and through Efrain’s telescope, I can see his shiny brown snout and sleepy eyes.

A slow metabolism and veggie diet are the reason that sloths move like they’re wading through treacle and sleep for up to 18 hours a day.

No wonder they look like they’re always smiling.

The next time I spy a furry twotoed cutie, however, I’m in the midst

GL, March 9, 2017

of a decidedly more energetic activity. I’m perched on the side of a bright red inflatable raft, paddling for dear life as we course down the fast-flowing Balsa River, close to the town of La Fortuna.

Don’t be fooled, as I was, into thinking white-water rafting is simply a case of letting the current carry you along.

You have to paddle - hard - to make sure you take the right path through rapids, and follow orders (‘lean in!’, ‘get down!’) when you hit the really rocky patches.

It’s insanely fun. I even enjoy the moment we turn back to ‘surf’ a fierce-looking rapid and I’m thrown overboard.

My guide, Marco, pulls me spluttering from the water, hanging on with all my might and grinning from ear to ear as we hit more frothy torrents.

And the thrills don’t end there. About

IT’S WELL KNOWN FOR ITS BEACHES AND WILDLIFE, BUT EXTREME SPORTS ARE THE BEST REASON TO VISIT COSTA RICA, SAYS KATIE WRIGHT

the THEFACTFILE

One of Costa Rica’s famous red-eyed tree frogs.

30 miles south, following a bus ride along steep and winding roads, it becomes clear why they call this a cloud forest, as fluffy marshmallow shapes obscure the mountaintops.

Monteverde is renowned for its rich botanical life. In the 1950s, biologists came here to study the thousands of insect and animal species that populate the area.

To assist with their research, they introduced an activity that has become one of Costa Rica’s most popular tourist pastimes.

Instead of climbing up and down trees all day, they realised it was faster to hook wires between the treetops and use a harness to shoot between them.

Et voila, zip lining was born, and Costa Rica is now considered the best place in the world to do it. Starting off in seated pose, legs crossed and gloved hands on the wire keeping me

steady, I hurtle along several sections - each getting progressively longer.

Eventually, I switch into a ‘superman’ pose, lying face down with arms outstretched.

Soaring like a bird along a 1.5km stretch, 100 metres above the hills, is exhilarating.

The same goes for the finale of my canopy tour, which is when I find myself jelly-legged and about to leap off that sky-high platform.

I feel an almighty lurch in my stomach as I plummet to the ground, before the rope of the ‘tarzan swing’ pings into action and I swoop upwards, whooping with delight (and relief).

I’m shaking as I’m lowered to safety, adrenaline coursing through my veins.

On the bus back to capital city San Jose, when my heart rate has just about returned to normal, my ba-

Katie Wright was a guest of Tucan Travel (www. tucantravel.co.uk; 020 8896 1600) who offers the nine-day Costa Rica Nature Trails tour from £769pp, including entry to Manuel Antonio National Park, entry to Monteverde Cloud Forest Reserve, all accommodation, four breakfasts, and a Tucan Travel tour leader.

Tucan Travel offers group tours and tailor-made adventures worldwide.

Costa Rican rainforest by-bungee jump experience has got me wondering if I could tackle the real thing, and I’ve heard there’s a pectacular place nearby to do it...

Alas, my time in this action-packed

GL, March 9, 2017

paradise has come to an end, and there are only so many unforgettable firsts I can pack into one trip.

That bungee jump will have to wait for next time.

TRAVEL

THIRSTY beach break? for a

HANGING OUT AT BEACH BARS IS AN INTEGRAL PART OF AN ANTIGUAN HOLIDAY. PETE THOMPSON SAMPLES A NEW BEACH BAR TRAIL AND RECOMMENDS THE SPOTS YOU CAN’T MISS

I

t’s nice to be important, but it’s more important to be nice,” bubbly mixologist David declares, before working his magic at the bar.

I’m not sure if he’s referring to Prince Harry, who visited Antigua the largest of the English-speaking Leeward Islands - last year, or even Harry Potter (aka Daniel Radcliffe) who’s sat at these very bar stalls and sipped David’s superb cocktails. Both VIPs were commended by locals for their down-to-earth friendliness.

This blissful Caribbean island, it

seems, brings out the best in rich and famous visitors. Feeling comfortable in these stunning surroundings, A-list celebrities flock to soak up yearround sun and enjoy magnificent hospitality. But with so many restaurants, bars and beach shacks to choose from, even regular visitors need a bit of helpful guidance.

Jacqui O’s, in St Mary’s Parish, is among a plethora of watering holes and restaurants on a Beach Bar Trail launched by the Antigua and Barbuda Tourism Authority. I’m visiting

to road-test their selection, which includes 31 venues across Antigua and sister island Barbuda, a short 90-minute ferry journey away.

I’m focussing my attention on An-

GL, March 9, 2017

tigua. With so many bars scattered around the 108 square-mile island, it is a trail to tackle in stages - although many are within walking distance.

I’ve selected a few of the best...

TRAVEL INFO JACQUI O’S BEACHHOUSE CRAB HILL BEACH

DENNIS COCKTAIL BAR AND RESTAURANT, FFRYES BEACH

A toe-dipping distance from the turquoise sea, beneath the shade of swaying palm trees, Jackie O’s is quintessential beach bar material. Serving cocktails and French-inspired cuisine, it’s much more than a seaside shack.

Over the years, it’s been rebuilt several times, but is still a firm favourite with returning visitors to the island. Sit in dreamy, shaded cabanas by the shore, where waiter service is provided, or grab a high stool at the bar and sample one of the many excellent cocktails on offer. Visit www.facebook.com/JacquiOsBeachHouseAntigua Secret tip: If arriving by yacht, anchor just off the beach.

When to go: Sunset pre-dinner drinks

Two of Antigua’s top beaches - Ffryes and Jolly Beach - are within easy reach of this friendly hilltop restaurant, with views sweeping down to the sea. Owner Dennis learned how to cook from his mum and serves Eva’s Breakfast in her honour. Jerk chicken and seafood are specialities on the menu and the goat curry attracts diners in the know from across Antigua. Arrive early to secure a dinner table. On Mondays, there are special roast suckling pig and wine nights. Visit www.dennisantigua.com Secret tip: Fans of spicy food will love the jerk pork.

When to go: Lunchtime, to make the most of the view.

SHEER ROCKS, FFRYES BEACH Part of the Cocobay Resort, this cliffedge bar is perfectly set to watch the sun dip into the sea. During the day, white linen drapes flutter above wooden trellises, as sophisticated diners share tapas on carefully laid tables.

Afterwards, visitors can sleep off their long lunch by curling up on one of the daybads. By night, the rocks below are floodlit, forming a romantic spot for couples. Ask the experimental barman to conjure up one of his rum-based cocktails. Visit www.sheer-rocks.com Secret tip: Bring your bathing suit to make use of the plunge pool.

When to go: Lunch, for superb tapas and wine.

■ Pete Thompson was a guest of the tourist board.

For information on Antigua and Barbuda, visit www.visitantigua barbuda.com. �■ Antigua Yacht Marina Club (aycmarinaresort. com/resort) has standard rooms with breakfast from 200 US dollars per night (about £160); Curtain Bluff, Antigua (curtainbluff. com) has deluxe rooms on an allinclusive basis from 820 US dollars (about £660), plus 22.5% taxes per night, based on two adults sharing.

■ For great offers, visit www.ba.com

BEACHLIMERZ, FORT JAMES BEACH TRAPPAS RESTAURANT & BAR, ENGLISH HARBOUR

BOOM, NELSON’S DOCKYARD

Although by no means a budget option, the prices here are very competitive, offering some of the best value on the island. The English Harbour location means it does attract a yachting crowd - although the prices and quality of food and drink bring in the locals. Service is speedy (unusual for the Caribbean) and alcoholic serving measures are generous (not so unusual). Alongside cocktails and beer, a good wine list is available. Visit www. facebook.com/Trappas Secret tip: Arrive early to grab a seat at one of the outdoor tables.

When to go: Any evening. It’s open every day of the year (except New Year’s Eve).

The poolside bar of The Admiral’s Inn hotel is a smart place to wine and dine.

It’s a short distance across the water from the main hotel, although a free shuttle service is available. Set in from of Gunpowder House, it’s perfectly positioned for a drink post-historic sightseeing. Swing on hammocks or splash in the pool, while the barman prepares an Antiguan Hemmingway - a rum and gin-based cocktail. Visit admiralsantigua.com Secret tip: Make this your jump off point for the famous Shirley Heights parties, held at the nearby lookout point.

When to go: Head for lunch and hang out for the afternoon.

GL, March 9, 2017

This small, friendly, family-owned bar with wooden tables and copper light fittings is dripping in rustic charm.

From 1pm onwards, people arrive for the tasty jambalaya lunch special. Afterwards, they digest by sitting on the rocks and admiring the beautiful northwest coastline. Most people come here to lime (chill out). Beach clothes are fine by day, but no trainers are allowed at night. Bizarrely, hair curlers are also banned...

Secret tip: Being only a 10-minute drive from St John’s ship dock, it’s a popular place for cruise ship passengers, so it might be worth checking what time the ships come in if you want a quiet drink! Visit www. beachlimerz.com When to go: Late afternoon to relax and laze.

QUICK FACTS ■ Antigua means “ancient” in Spanish after an icon in Seville Cathedral.

■ The island’s circumference is roughly 87 km (54 mi) and its area 281 km2 (108 sq mi). Its population was 80,161 (at the 2011 Census).

■ The economy is mainly reliant on tourism,

TELEVISION

THE BUCK STOPS WITH ME JAMES NESBITT IS BACK ON SCREENS IN STAN LEE’S LUCKY MAN. HE TELLS SUSAN GRIFFIN HOW HE CAN RELATE TO THE FLAWED SUPERHERO

J

ames Nesbitt enters the room looking tanned, having just returned from a holiday in Mexico with his two teenage daughters.

“This is all real,” he says in his familiar Northern Irish drawl, taking a seat on a sofa.

It was a well-deserved break following a busy year. He completed The Secret, about double-murderer Colin Howell, before Christmas 2015. “Then I worked straight from Cold Feet to Lucky Man,” says Nesbitt, 52. “I had such a lovely time but when you come back, you’re straight into it again. I start filming Cold Feet on Monday.”

There was much hype ahead of the Cold Feet crew reuniting after 13 years - could it possibly be the same?

But the new series didn’t let anyone down.

“Yeah, it went very well, and now we’ve got to do it all over again, which is a responsibility,” says Nesbitt, crossing and uncrossing his legs and arms throughout the conversation.

Not only did the reunion allow fans

of the original series to reflect on their own passing years (“Oh yeah, I think Cold Feet held up a lot of mirrors to a lot of people,” Nesbitt nods in agreement), but it introduced the gang to a new audience.

“I, in my arrogance, thought everyone had seen the first five series, but quite a lot of people hadn’t. They came to it new, loved it, embraced those characters and really got it, so that’s encouraging,” adds the actor, who considers himself “lucky” that Cold Feet is “such an ensemble piece”.

It means he can enjoy time off and regularly return home to London from the Manchester set to see his daughters (he and their mum, Sonia, divorced last year after 22 years of marriage).

Stan Lee’s Lucky Man, which returned to Sky1 on February 24 for a second run, is filmed in the capital, but Nesbitt shoulders the responsibility of playing the leading man.

“And it really is, at the risk of sounding arrogant, my show,” he says, noting that the pressure of playing a title character isn’t often talked

about. There should be a pressure, because often the buck stops with you.”

In the show, created by comic book icon Stan Lee, Nesbitt plays DI Harry Clayton, “a contemporary superhero” who’s been given a bracelet that brings him great luck.

There’s plenty of action, which, he remarks, “gives you an excuse to keep fit”.

“But as I am a man of a certain age, you do feel a bit stiffer in the morning, a wee bit creaky, but I love that and the fitter you are of body, the fitter you are also of mind.

“I’ve always been like that because I enjoy the good things in life, and so to enjoy the good things in life, you’ve got to do the difficult things in life as well.”

Aside from working with a personal trainer, Nesbitt has “a mini gym in my trailer”.

Sounds fancy?

“Too bloody right!” he exclaims. “It becomes your home for six months, so you want to be comfortable. I’ve got a very nice bed too, which I use a lot.”

He feels “blessed”, a term he uses

GL, March 9, 2017

frequently, by his success.

“The work is full-on but it’s something I always wanted to do. And the fact I still enjoy it and am challenged by it is a blessing. So the balance is pretty good - I think.”

In the new series, Harry is “clearly trying to walk the right path”.

“Harry didn’t ask for this bracelet,” notes Nesbitt, then pauses as he feels the need to explain himself.

“I’m aware when I talk about these things, I have to embrace the genre.

It’s ridiculous, but I think what makes it so entertaining is you have to treat it with truth,” he comments before continuing.

“Harry’s trying not to use it [the bracelet] because he’s seen the price and that for every good bit of luck, something bad can happen to those he loves. Or that’s what he’s always been led to believe. When we find him, he’s trying to be the better man, but of course, all that’s thrown into disarray when Isabella [who’s also got a bracelet, played by Thekla Reuten] arrives.”

How would he fare meeting a femme-fatale like Isabella in real life?

“I’d be terrified but I’ve got three older sisters, I’ve grown up with them. My mother had three sisters, my granny had three sisters, so I’ve grown up loving but being intimidated by women as well,” he quips.

Nesbitt admits the superhero genre isn’t one he was “really that interested in” before embarking on this project.

“It just didn’t play a part in my life, but now I’ve embraced it so much, I love it. I think the escapism of the genre is important to people in an ever-changing, complicated world,” he says.

both of us, for the right things. So yes, I recognise a lot in him.”

Born and raised in Ballymena, County Antrim, he recalls it being “hard to entertain the notion of being an actor, because it didn’t seem like a real job”.

Though not shy as a child, he says, “I was quite isolated”.

“I wasn’t lonely by any stretch of the imagination, but I did spend time on my own and I think that can fuel one’s imagination,” he muses.

Being Northern Irish “is everything”, and he regularly returns home.

“My three best mates are there. My dad’s still there. Two of my sisters are there. I have a company there called G&H Film and Television Services, so do all the facilities for Game Of Thrones. I’ve got a presence there, and have just bought a property by the sea.”

His pals often take the mick out of their friend’s career.

“Well, they think it’s ridiculous.

They don’t think it’s a real job at all,” says Nesbitt, laughing. “But they’ve done rather well from it!

“They looked out for me when I was at drama school and impoverished, and now we’ve got to have some fun perks from it... I’ve been very, very lucky. I’m a lucky man!”

I’D BE TERRIFIED BUT I’VE GOT THREE OLDER SISTERS. MY MOTHER HAD THREE SISTERS, MY GRANNY HAD THREE SISTERS, SO I’VE GROWN UP LOVING BUT BEING INTIMIDATED BY WOMEN AS WELL

James Nesbitt in Stan Lee’s Lucky Man

“I think they need that. What’s important about Harry Clayton is that he is flawed. He’s quite anti-heroic in a sense. He’s an addict; he walks a very fine line in terms of the law. He’s lost his wife and his family, he sometimes makes decisions that are questionable, but he errs ultimately on the side of right.”

Nesbitt could relate to the character straightaway.

“Harry and I are 52 years old and we’ve probably seen a lot, been involved in a lot and had our ups and downs, but we’re still trying to fight,

GL, March 9, 2017

STAN LEE’S LUCKY MAN CONTINUES ON SKY1 ON FRIDAYS

TV PICKS

ANT & DEC’S SATURDAY NIGHT TAKEAWAY 7pm, ITV

The duo’s weekend variety show returns, and this year, the pair have recruited Scarlett Moffatt to become their new co-host.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 10.00 Saturday Kitchen Live (S,HD). 11.30 The Little Paris Kitchen: Cooking with Rachel Khoo (R,S,HD). 12.00 Football Focus (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 2.00 Live Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). Scotland v Wales (Kick-off 2.25pm). 4.30 Final Score (S,HD).

5.10 BBC News (S,HD). 5.20 Regional News (S). 5.30 Celebrity Mastermind (R,S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

TABOO 9.15pm, BBC1

The historical drama created by Tom Hardy, his father Chips, and frequent collaborator Steven Knight comes to an explosive conclusion as the time of reckoning arrives for both James Delaney (Hardy) and his nemesis, the villainous East India Company chairman Sir Stuart Strange (Jonathan Pryce).

BBC2

6.30 Film: They Flew Alone (S) (1942). ●● 8.10 Film: In Which We Serve (S,HD) (1942). ●●●●● 10.00 Britain’s Secret Seas (R,S,HD). 11.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 12.00 Two Greedy Italians: Still Hungry (R,S,HD). 1.00 Film: Waterloo (S,HD) (1970). ●●●● 3.10 Natural World (R,S). 4.00 Mastermind (R,S,HD). 4.30 University Challenge (R,S,HD). 5.00 Only Connect (R,S,HD). 5.30 The House That £100K Built (R,S,HD).

LET IT SHINE 6.45pm, BBC1

The battle of the boy bands is almost over as the three finalists take to the stage one last time, demonstrating their singing and dancing skills in the hope of winning the starring roles.

ITV

6.00 CITV. 7.30 Scrambled! 9.25 ITV News (S). 9.30 Alphabetical (R,S,HD).

10.25 Guess This House (R,S,HD). 11.25 Off Their Rockers (R,S,HD). 11.55 ITV News and Weather (S). 12.00 Film: Free Willy 2: The Adventure Home (S,HD) (1995). ●● 1.50 Tipping Point (R,S,HD).

2.50 The Chase (R,S,HD). 3.50 Regional News (S). 4.00 ITV News and Weather (S).

4.15 Live Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). Ireland v France (Kick-off 4.50pm).

GREAT CANAL JOURNEYS 8pm, Channel 4

Timothy West and Prunella Scales venture into the open sea as they make their way through the islands of Scotland’s coast. Their destination is the rarely used nine-mile Crinan canal on the Mull of Kintyre. However, the Atlantic waves off the coast of Mull force them to head inland to Tobermory.

Channel 4

6.20 Mobil 1 The Grid (S). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 8.30 Frasier (R,S). 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 11.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 12.00 Jamie and Jimmy’s Friday Night Feast (R,S,HD). 1.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD). 3.30 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun (R,S,HD). 4.30 Location, Location, Location (R,S,HD).

5.35 Grand Designs (R,S,HD). A couple build a unique house in Pembrokeshire.

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake!. 10.05 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (R,S,HD). 10.40 Access (S,HD). 10.45 Police Interceptors Unleashed (R,S,HD). 11.15 Police Interceptors (R,S,HD). 1.15 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole (R,S). 3.15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (R,S,HD). 5.15 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords (R,S,HD). A landlady gets a shock when she finally gains access to her property.

12

6.30 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 55/76. From Ashbourne, Derbyshire.

Great Canal Journeys, 8pm

NCIS, 8pm

6.30 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

6.10 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away (R,S,HD). 4/5. Paul Bohill and Steve Pinner try to repossess a house.

7.00 Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway (S,HD). 1/7. See Choices Above.

7.00 Penelope Keith’s Favourite Villages (R,S,HD). The actress travels around Britain, visiting villages in different parts of the country.

7.05 NCIS: Los Angeles (S,HD).

11/24. The team hunts down a device that could destroy Los Angeles.

8.25 Casualty (S,HD). 25/45. Steph is rushed to hospital when she tries to kill herself, and Connie refuses to treat her. Meanwhile, Iain helps Gem to get a job at the hospital coffee shop.

8.00 Diana: Designing a Princess (S,HD). See Choices Above.

8.30 Dad’s Army (R,S). 2/6. An invasion alert causes chaos.

8.30 The Voice UK (S,HD). The talent contest moves into the Battle phase, in which Tom Jones, Will.i.am, Gavin Rossdale and Jennifer Hudson are expected to shape their protégés into their pop icons.

8.00 Great Canal Journeys (R,S,HD). See Choices Above.

8.00 NCIS (S,HD). 8/24. DiNozzo must help old flame Jeanne Benoit rescue her kidnapped husband.

8.55 5 News Weekend (S,HD).

9.15 Taboo (S,HD). 8/8. See Choices Above.

9.00 My Old Lady (S,HD) (2014).

See Choices Above. ●●●

9.00 Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (S,HD) (2014). Premiere.

The leader of a colony of intelligent apes tries to prevent his tribe going to war against the human race. Sci-fi thriller sequel, starring Andy Serkis and Jason Clarke. ●●●●

9.00 Football on 5: The Championship (S,HD). George Riley and Lynsey Hipgrave introduce highlights from the weekend’s Championship games, including Leeds United v Sheffield Wednesday in a huge Yorkshire derby at Elland Road.

10.15 BBC News; Weather (S,HD).

Followed by National Lottery Update.

10.30 Match of the Day (S,HD). Gary Lineker presents highlights of the latest Premier League matches, including Chelsea v Swansea City at Stamford Bridge and Hull City v Burnley at the KCOM Stadium.

10.45 QI XL (S,HD). 1/16. With Matt Lucas, Lucy Porter and Ross Noble.

11.50 This Country (S,HD). 3/6. Kerry and Kurtan eagerly await the release of their uncle, Steve “Nugget” Nuggins.

11.30 Albert Nobbs (S,HD) (2011).

Period drama, starring Glenn Close. ●●●

12.15 Film: Return from the River Kwai (S) (1988). Second World War drama sequel, starring Chris Penn. ●● 1.50 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 1.55 BBC News (S,HD).

1.15 Film: Youth Without Youth (S,HD) (2007). Drama, starring Tim Roth. ●● 3.15 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

▼

7.30 Grand Tours of the Scottish Islands (S,HD). 2/6. Paul Murton journeys around the coast of the Long Island of Harris and Lewis.

▼

after

6.00 Pointless Celebrities (R,S,HD).

6/8. A radio-themed edition.

6.45 Let It Shine: Live Final (S,HD).

8/8. See Choices Above.

The Voice UK, 8.30pm

▼

11

Grand Tours of the … 7.30pm

▼

10

Casualty, 8.25pm

▼

6 7 8 9

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

▼

EPW-E01-S1

SATURDAY

10.30 ITV News and Weather (S); Weather.

10.45 The Boat That Rocked (S,HD) (2009). An offshore pirate-radio station entertains 1960s Britain, but the authorities are determined to shut it down.

Richard Curtis’s comedy, with Bill Nighy and Philip Seymour Hoffman. ●●●

1.10 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). Toyah Willcox hosts a dinner party. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service.

GL, March 9, 2017

10.00 Football on 5: Goal Rush (S,HD). Goals from the weekend’s games in Leagues One and Two. 10.30 Stealing the Mona Lisa (S,HD). 5/6. See Choices Above.

11.35 Surrogates (S,HD) (2009). See Choices Above. ●●●

11.30 Police Interceptors Unleashed (R,S,HD). 7/10. PC Barry Peach is confronted by a foul-mouthed pensioner.

1.15 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S). 2.05 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Omnibus.

Problems arise between Ste and Harry. 4.15 Kirstie’s Fill Your House for Free (R,S,HD). 4.25 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). The property expert visits Bishop’s Stortford, Hertfordshire. 5.20 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD). General knowledge quiz, hosted by Sandi Toksvig.

12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 That’s So 1985 (R,S). A look at events in 1985. 4.00 Bargain-Loving Brits in the Sun (R,S,HD). Middlesbrough man Michael has great ambitions for his new high-end bar. Last in the series. 4.50 House Doctor (R,S). 5.15 Nick’s Quest (R,S). 5.40 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.50 Roary the Racing Car (R,S).

ITV2

6.00 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 6.10 Emmerdale (S,HD). 8.50 Coronation Street (S,HD). 11.10 Ninja Warrior UK (R,HD). 12.10 Take Me Out (R,S,HD). 1.25 The Brit Awards 2017 (R,S,HD). 3.55 Film: Step Up 3 (S,HD) (2010). ●●● 4.55 FYI Daily (HD). 5.00 Film: Step Up 3 (S,HD) (2010).

Concluded. ●●●

This episode looks back to 1911, when one of the most famous pieces of art across the globe, the Mona Lisa, was stolen from the Louvre museum in Paris. As the painting is one of the most written about pieces of art, and also the most expensive, the heist sent shockwaves around the world.

E4

6.00 Young & Hungry (R,S,HD). 6.45 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD).

7.35 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 8.30 Melissa & Joey (R,S,HD). 9.30 Young & Hungry (R,S,HD). 10.30 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD). 1.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S). 1.15 Film: Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (S,HD) (2009). ●● 3.00 Film: St Trinian’s 2: The Legend of Fritton’s Gold (S,HD) (2009). ●● 5.05 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD).

Sky1

6.00 Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old? (R,S,HD). 7.00 Monkey Business (R,S). 8.00 The Big Spell (R,S,HD). 9.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 10.00 Soccer AM (HD). 11.30 Football’s Funniest Moments (R,HD). 12.00 Portrait Artist of the Year 2017 (R,S,HD). 1.00 Futurama (R,S). 2.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.00 Supergirl (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

Brenda Emmanus explores the stories behind some of the most exquisite dresses owned by Diana, Princess of Wales, some of which are on display in an exhibition at Kensington Palace.

MY OLD LADY 9pm, BBC2

Premiere. A penniless New Yorker hopes to sell his dead father’s flat in Paris, but finds it has an eccentric, elderly tenant. Comedy drama, starring Maggie Smith.

GOLD

7.00 Cheers (S). 7.50 One Foot in the Grave (S). Victor starts a new job. 8.30 To the Manor Born (S).

9.50 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 11.50 The Vicar of Dibley (S).

1.40 Only Fools and Horses (S).

3.10 Only Fools and Horses (S).

Christmas special from 1993. Del visits the dentist. 5.00 Only Fools and Horses (S). The council rejects Del’s application for a grant.

American Pie, 9pm

Paul, 9pm

Star Wars: Episode I ... 7pm

Not Going Out, 9pm

6.05 Jack and Jill (S,HD) (2011). Comedy, starring Adam Sandler. ●

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24. Sheldon receives acting lessons.

6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 15/24.

6.00 MacGyver (R,S,HD).

3/22. The team heads to Malaysia to extract a terrorist group’s financier.

6.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 2/3. The brothers’ finances hit an all-time low.

7.05 FYI Daily (HD).

7.10 Jack and Jill (S,HD) (2011). Concluded. ●

7.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 16/24.

7.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 17/24. Sheldon decides to make new friends.

7.00 Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace (HD) (1999). Sci-fi prequel, with Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor. ●●●

7.40 The Black Adder (S).

1/6. Edmund’s father becomes king.

8.00 Scorpion (S,HD). 12/24.

Cabe is wounded by exploding shrapnel during a desert mission, and the team must freeze his body in order to save his life.

8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 13/24. The gang treat themselves to a Sheldon-free weekend.

8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24.

9.00 American Pie (S,HD) (1999). Four teenage boys make a pact to lose their virginity before the high-school prom, but cause huge embarrassment in the process. Comedy, starring Jason Biggs and Chris Klein. ●●●●

9.00 Paul (S,HD) (2011). A captive alien escapes from a secret military base and seeks the help of two English comicbook geeks in getting to his spaceship. Sci-fi comedy, with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. ●●●●

10.10 FYI Daily (HD).

10.15 American Pie (S,HD) (1999). Concluded. ●●●●

8.20 Blackadder Goes Forth (S). 6/6. Capt Blackadder pretends to be insane.

9.45 Stan Lee’s Lucky Man (R,S,HD). 1/10. Harry meets a mysterious woman wearing a bracelet identical to his.

Return of the crime drama co-created by comic-book legend Stan Lee, starring James Nesbitt.

Sky Sports 1

6.00 Football Gold (S). 7.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD).

8.00 Football Gold (S). 8.30 Premier League Preview (HD).

9.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 10.00 Soccer AM (HD). 11.30 Premier League Preview (HD).

12.00 Live EFL (HD). Leeds United v Sheffield Wednesday (Kick-off 12.30pm). 3.00 Gillette Soccer Saturday (HD). 5.15 Live EFL (HD).

Live EFL, 12pm

10.30 Nissan Match Choice (HD). Extended highlights from the Premier League, allowing viewers to access the latest round of top-flight fixtures.

11.00 Bottom (S). 3/6. Richie 11.45 A League of Their and Eddie prepare for Own (R,HD). 8/10. With their holiday.

Nicole Scherzinger, Noel Fielding and James 11.40 Bottom (S). 4/6. Eddie Haskell. hatches a get-rich-quick scheme.

11.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). Chelsea v Swansea City.

12.25 American Dad! (R,S). Stan and Hayley visit a gun theme park.

12.55 Film: Couples Retreat (S,HD) (2009). Comedy, starring Vince Vaughn and Malin Akerman. ●● 1.55 FYI Daily (HD). 2.00 Film: Couples Retreat (S,HD) (2009). Concluded. ●● 3.00 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

12.10 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD).

1.15 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD).

2.20 Gap Year (R,S,HD). 3.15 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (R,S,HD). 4.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.25 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.45 Revenge (R,S,HD). A grief-stricken Emily tries to repair the damage she has caused.

12.45 Duck Quacks Don’t Echo (R,S,HD). 1.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 2.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 2.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S,HD). 4.15 Stop, Search, Seize (R,HD). 5.10 Road Wars (R,S,HD).

12.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 12.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 1.00 Live Fight Night International (HD). 3.30 Premier League Highlights (HD).

4.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 4.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 5.00 Premier League Highlights (HD).

RADIO

11.05 Gogglebox (R,S,HD).

5/12. Reactions to programmes including The Apprentice and Spider House.

Westminster. 11.30 From Our Own Correspondent. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Money Box. 12.30 The News Quiz. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 News. 1.10 Any Questions? From Edwinstree Middle School in Hertfordshire 2.00 Any Answers? 2.30 Drama: Herald of Disaster. Drama-documentary about the 1987 capsizing of a cross-channel ferry 4.00 Weekend Woman’s Hour. With Nikki Bedi 5.00 Saturday PM. 5.30 The Bottom Line. 5.54 Shipping Forecast.

5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News.

6.15 Loose Ends. With guests Goldie, Dr Miriam Stoppard and Daniel Cole 7.00 Profile. With Edward Stourton

Film4

BBC4

11.00 The Violent Men (HD) (1955). ●●● 12.55 Cutthroat Island (1995). ●● 3.15 Carry On Cabby (1963). ●●● 5.00 Mr Popper’s Penguins (HD) (2011). ●●●

6.45 The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (HD) (2010). ●●● 9.00 Pitch Perfect (HD) (2012). A college freshman joins an a cappella singing group made up of social misfits to compete in music competitions.

Comedy, starring Anna Kendrick and Rebel Wilson. ●●●● 11.15 It Follows (HD) (2014). After sleeping with her boyfriend for the first time, a teenager is stalked by an unseen, supernatural menace. Horror, starring Maika Monroe. ●●●●

7.00 Indian Hill Railways (R,HD).

The lives and loves of workers on the Nilgiri Mountain Railway.

8.00 Timeshift: The People’s Liners – Britain’s Lost Pleasure Fleets (R,HD).

9.00 Treasures of Ancient Egypt (R,HD). How the decline of the Egyptian Empire ran parallel with a creative revival.

Last in the series.

10.00 Timewatch: Captain Cook – The Man Behind the Legend (R,HD).

11.00 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R).

11.30 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R).

12.05 Arena: Loretta Lynn – Still a Mountain Girl (R,HD). 1.35 Country Kings at the BBC (R,HD).

2.35 Country Queens at the BBC (R,HD). 3.35 Sounds of the Seventies (R,HD). 3.50 Pop Go the Sixties (R,HD).

9.00 Not Going Out (S,HD).

1/6. First episode of the sitcom, starring Lee Mack.

9.40 Not Going Out (S,HD).

2/6. A death in the family brings Tim and Kate closer.

10.20 Not Going Out (S,HD).

10.45 NCIS: Los Angeles 3/6. Lee pretends to be (R,HD). 8/24. A graduate Tim. student developing a weapon for the navy is attacked and the team discovers a connection to international warfare.

Kensi continues with her gruelling physical therapy.

Radio 3 7.00am Breakfast. 9.00 News. 9.03 Record Review. 12.15pm Music Matters. 1.00 News. 1.02 Saturday Classics. 3.00 Sound of Cinema. 4.00 Jazz Record Requests.

5.00 Jazz Line-Up. 6.00 Opera on 3: Live from the Met. 10.00 Hear and Now. Midnight Geoffrey Smith’s Jazz.

1.00 Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 iPM. 6.00 News and Papers. 6.07 Ramblings.

6.30 Farming Today This Week. 6.57 Weather. 7.00 Today. 8.51 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament. 9.00 Saturday Live. 10.30 And the Academy Award Goes To. 11.00 The Week in

An FBI agent in a future where people only interact through robot doubles ventures into the real world to catch a killer. Sci-fi thriller, with Bruce Willis.

The Sixth Sense (HD) 8.00 EFL Goals (HD). A round- 1.20 (1999). ●●●●● up of recent matches.

8.30 Nissan Game of the Day (HD). Hayley McQueen presents a full re-run of the day’s top Premier League match.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

13/22. Stewie auditions in drag for a TV show.

11.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

6/22.

11.55 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

8/22.

Radio 1 6.00am Dev. 10.00 The Matt Edmondson Show. 1.00pm Alice Levine. 4.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Danny Howard. 7.00 Asian Network Live. 11.00 The Rap Show with Charlie Sloth. 1.00am DJ Target.

4.00 Diplo and Friends.

Radio 2 5.00am Radio 2 Playlists: 21st Century Songs. 6.00 Anneka Rice. 8.00 Sounds of the 60s. 10.00 Graham Norton. 1.00pm Pick of the Pops.

3.00 Jo Whiley. 6.00 Liza Tarbuck.

8.00 Trevor Nelson’s Rhythm Nation.

10.00 The Craig Charles House Party.

Midnight Bob Harris Sunday. 3.00 Radio 2’s Showtunes Playlist. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Love Songs.

SATURDAY

SURROGATES 11.35pm, Channel 4

12.20 Bottom Live: The Big Number 2 Tour. Stage show of the comedy series. 2.25 Bill Hicks Live: Revelations. A 1993 performance by the stand-up comedian. 3.30 jam. Blackly comic sketch show.

4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

7.15 Saturday Review. The week’s cultural highlights 8.00 Archive on 4: 1917: Eyewitness in Petrograd. Emily Dicks explores her grandfather’s memories of the Russian Revolution 9.02 Drama: Ann Veronica. Part one of two. Dramatisation of HG Wells’ novel 10.00 News and Weather. 10.15 The Moral Maze. Michael Buerk chairs a debate on ethical issues 11.00 Brain of Britain. The fifth heat of the general knowledge contest 11.30 Poetry Please. Roger McGough presents poems about parenting Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Martian Stories. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast.

GL, March 9, 2017

Radio 5 Live 5.00am 5 Live Sport: The Friday Football Social. 6.00 Saturday Breakfast. 9.00 The Danny Baker Show. 11.00 Fighting Talk.

Noon 5 Live Sport. 3.00 5 Live Sport.

5.00 Sports Report. 6.06 6-0-6. 8.00 Kermode and Mayo’s Film Review. 9.00 Stephen Nolan. Midnight 5 Live in Short. 1.00 Up All Night.

Classic FM 7.00am Alan Titchmarsh.

10.00 Bill Turnbull. 1.00pm Alexander Armstrong. 3.00 Nicholas Owen. 5.00 Saturday Night at the Movies. 7.00 Alex James’s Date Night. 9.00 David Mellor’s Light Music Matters. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Katie Breathwick. 4.00 Jane Jones.

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EPW-E01-S1

STEALING THE MONA LISA 10.30pm, Channel 5

DIANA: DESIGNING A PRINCESS 8pm, BBC2

RIVERS WITH JEREMY PAXMAN 8pm, Channel 4

TV PICKS

New series. The presenter travels along England’s greatest rivers, exploring the history and wildlife.

The first episode focuses on the Tweed.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 7.35 Match of the Day (R,S,HD). 9.00 The Andrew Marr Show (S,HD). 10.00 The Big Questions (S,HD). 11.00 Regional Programme (S).

12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News (S,HD). 1.15 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 2.15 Flog It! (R,S,HD).

3.15 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 4.00 Songs of Praise (S,HD). 4.35 Shop Well for Less? (R,S,HD). 5.35 BBC News (S,HD).

5.50 Regional News (S).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

CALL THE MIDWIFE 8pm, BBC1

It’s October 1962 and the world is on tenterhooks, as tensions between the Soviet Union and the US look set to boil over. As Poplar responds to the escalating Cuban Missile Crisis, Valerie Dyer is still finding her feet at Nonnatus House and oversees the care of heavily pregnant first-time mother.

BBC2

7.15 An Island Parish: Anguilla (R,S,HD).

7.45 Around the World in 80 Gardens (R,S,HD). 8.45 Countryfile (R,S,HD). 9.45 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites (S). 11.15 Nigel Slater’s Dish of the Day (R,S,HD). 11.45 Nigellissima (R,S,HD). 12.15 MOTD2 Extra (S,HD). 1.00 Holiday of My Lifetime with Len Goodman (R,S,HD). 1.30 Money for Nothing (R,S,HD). 2.15 Wanted Down Under Revisited (R,S,HD). 3.00 Birds of Paradise: The Ultimate Quest (R,S,HD). 4.00 Bobsleigh and Skeleton World Championships (S,HD).

SS-GB 9pm, BBC1

Archer rushes to the rescue after learning of a resistance plan to kidnap his son. But he is trailed every step of the way by Huth and may be placing the boy in even greater danger.

ITV

6.00 CITV. 9.25 Countrywise: Guide to Britain (R,S,HD). Liz Bonnin witnesses the River Severn during one of its massive tidal bores. 10.00 Peston on Sunday (S,HD).

10.55 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD).

David Van Day is today’s mystery cook.

11.55 ITV News and Weather (S). 12.00 The Voice UK (R,S,HD). 2.00 Live Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). England v Italy (Kick-off 3.00pm). 5.30 Regional News (S). 5.45 ITV News and Weather (S).

DRAGONS’ DEN 8pm, BBC2

Deborah Meaden, Peter Jones, Touker Suleyman, Sarah Willingham and Nick Jenkins assess the profit-making potential of a husband and wife team’s Welsh delicacy, a new male fragrance, and a London businessman’s food delivery service for Michelin star restaurants.

Channel 4

6.15 The King of Queens (R,S). 7.05 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 8.25 Frasier (R,S). 9.30 Sunday Brunch (S,HD).

12.30 The Simpsons (R,S). 2.00 George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces (R,S,HD). A man transforming a private jet into a crash pad.

3.00 Location, Location, Location (R,S,HD). 4.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

4.30 Film: 101 Dalmatians (S,HD) (1996).

Disney comedy adventure remake, starring Glenn Close. ●●●

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake!. 10.10 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (R,S,HD). 10.45 Football on 5: The Championship (R,S,HD). 11.40 Football on 5: Goal Rush (R,S,HD). 12.10 Inside Windsor Castle (R,S,HD). 1.10 Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh (R,S,HD). 2.10 Film: No Reservations (S,HD) (2007). ●●● 4.10 Film: Bride Wars (S,HD) (2009). Comedy, starring Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway. ●● 5.55 5 News Weekend (S,HD).

11 after

12

Live Six Nations Rugby Union, 2pm

The Jump, 6.30pm

The EFL Cup Final … 8.15pm

▼

6.00 Six Nations Rugby Union (S,HD). Action from the third weekend of the tournament.

6.00 Unbelievable Moments Caught on Camera (S,HD).

2/2. Wakeboarders have a memorable encounter with dolphins.

6.30 The Jump (S,HD). The remaining contestants compete in two different disciplines.

6.00 The Fifth Element (S) (1997).

Sci-fi adventure, starring Bruce Willis. ●●●●

▼

7.00 Countryfile (S,HD). Matt Baker and Ellie Harrison present the show from the Isle of Man, taking a trip in a horse-drawn tram. Including weather for the week ahead.

7.00 Dragons’ Den: Pitches to Riches (R,S,HD). Richard Osman presents a look back at some of the most memorable contestants to feature on the show.

7.00 The Voice UK (S,HD). The second night of the Battles phase, in which the singers have to impress coaches Tom Jones, Will.i.am, Gavin Rossdale and Jennifer Hudson.

▼

8.00 Call the Midwife (S,HD). 6/8.

See Choices Above.

8.00 Dragons’ Den (S,HD). 16/16.

See Choices Above.

8.00 Rivers with Jeremy Paxman (S,HD). 1/4. See Choices Above.

8.15 The EFL Cup Final Highlights: Football on 5 (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 SS-GB (S,HD). 2/5. See Choices Above.

9.00 Special Forces – Ultimate Hell Week (S,HD). 5/6. The remaining recruits arrive in France to receive training with an elite tactical unit of the French police, where they face psychological and strategic challenges.

9.00 Homeland (S). 5/12. Keane is left on the sidelines, while Carrie’s work starts to impact on her home life.

9.00 Olympus Has Fallen (S,HD) (2013). A disgraced secret service agent tries to redeem himself when terrorists take control of the White House.

Action thriller, starring Gerard Butler, Aaron Eckhart and Morgan Freeman. Includes 5 News Update at 10pm. ●●

9.00 The Good Karma Hospital (S,HD). 4/6. See Choices Above.

▼

10

Special Forces – Ultimate … 9pm

6.00 The Big Painting Challenge (S,HD). 3/6. The contestants visit Whipsnade Zoo to paint the animals.

10.00 BBC News (S,HD).

10.20 Regional News (S).

10.30 Have I Got a Bit More Old News for You (R,S,HD). 1/9.

Extended edition. Stephen Mangan hosts, with Suzanne Evans and Henning Wehn.

10.00 Life of Crime (S) (2013). See Choices Above. ●●●

10.00 ITV News and Weather (S); Weather.

10.20 Peston on Sunday (R,S,HD).

Political magazine, presented

by Robert Peston, with ITV News National Editor Allegra Stratton.

10.00 Gogglebox (R,S,HD). The amateur critics share their opinions on what they have been watching during the week as the popular series returns for its ninth run.

▼

6 7 8 9

The Big Painting Challenge, 6pm

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

11.15 American High School (S,HD).

3/6. One of the school’s few white students throws a birthday party.

11.35 Women’s Six Nations Highlights (S,HD). Action from the third round of fixtures.

11.20 Premiership Rugby Union (S,HD). Action from the 16th round of fixtures.

11.00 Clear and Present Danger (S,HD) (1994). Action thriller, starring Harrison Ford. ●●●

11.15 The Terminator (S,HD) (1984).

See Choices Above. ●●●●●

▼

EPW-E01-S1

SUNDAY

12.00 The Celebrity Apprentice USA (S,HD). The contestants promote South African tourism. 1.20 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 1.25 BBC News (S,HD).

12.05 Film: Badlands (S) (1973). Crime drama, starring Martin Sheen and Sissy Spacek. ●●●●● 1.35 Sign Zone: Question Time (R,S). Topical debate from Stoke-on-Trent. 2.35 Sign Zone: Holby City (R,S). Isaac’s relationship with Dominic reaches breaking point. 3.30 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.20 Phillip Schofield’s South African Adventure (R,S,HD). 12.45 Jackpot247.

Interactive gaming. 3.00 Chopping Block (R,S,HD). The couples debone and skin a chicken. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Textbased information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

1.30 The Last Leg (R,S,HD). A comic review of the past seven days. 2.30 Hoarder SOS (R,S,HD). Experts persuade a Cambridgeshire woman to part with piles of perfume bottles. 3.25 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). 4.20 Kirstie’s Handmade Treasures (R,S,HD). 4.40 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.10 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

1.15 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh (R,S,HD).

Alan visits Attingham Hall in Shropshire.

4.00 Witches: A Century of Murder (R,S,HD). 4.50 House Doctor (R,S). 5.15 Nick’s Quest (R,S). 5.40 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.50 Roary the Racing Car (R,S).

GL, March 9, 2017

ITV2

6.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.35 The Voice UK (R,S,HD). 10.35 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 1.00 2Awesome 2.50 The Hot Desk: Jonas Blue (R,S,HD). 3.05 Film: The Smurfs 2 (S,HD) (2013). ●● 4.05 FYI Daily (HD). 4.10 Film: The Smurfs 2 (S,HD) (2013).

Concluded. ●● 5.10 Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway (R,S,HD).

E4

6.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 6.20 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD).

7.05 Melissa & Joey (R,S,HD).

8.00 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 10.30 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs – Final Week (R,S,HD). 12.05 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs: Final Week (R,S,HD). 1.15 The Jump (R,S,HD).

2.55 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

4.25 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD).

Sky1

6.00 Hour of Power (R,HD). 7.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 7.30 Futurama (R,S). 9.00 Supergirl (R,S,HD). 10.00 Rugby’s Funniest Moments (R,S,HD). 11.00 WWE Raw Hlts (R,S,HD). 12.00 Futurama (R,S). 2.00 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5.30 The Big Spell (S,HD). The grand final of the competition. Last in the series.

FILM PICKS

Manchester United v Southampton. Lynsey Hipgrave and George Riley present action from the showpiece match, as Jose Mourinho’s Red Devils met Claude Puel’s Saints at Wembley Stadium. United last made the final in 2010.

A medical case becomes personal for Ram as he prepares to attend a wedding, while Ruby treats a patient from the UK whose story does not add up.

THE TERMINATOR 11.15pm, Channel 5

A cyborg is sent back in time to kill a woman whose unborn son is destined to save the human race. Sci-fi thriller, with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

GOLD

7.00 Cheers (S). 7.50 One Foot in the Grave (S). Margaret collapses with exhaustion. 8.30 To the Manor Born (S). 11.10 Only Fools and Horses (S). 12.35 Only Fools and Horses (S). 2.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 3,50 Only Fools and Horses (S). The Trotters become caped crusaders. 5.05 Only Fools and Horses (S). The brothers’ finances hit an all-time low.

Ibiza Weekender, 9pm

Marvel’s Agents of ... 9pm

The Big Spell, 5.30pm

Only Fools and Horses, 6.25pm

6.45 Kindergarten Cop (S,HD) (1990). Comedy, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. ●●●

6.25 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24.

6.55 Men in Black 3 (S,HD) (2012). Sci-fi comedy, with Will Smith. ●●●

6.30 The Simpsons (S,HD).

Krusty and his daughter spend Christmas with the Simpsons.

6.25 Only Fools and Horses (S). 3/3. The Trotters finally strike gold.

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

5/13. Bart takes a crash course in self-defence.

7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

3/13. Homer contemplates suicide.

7.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). The brothers jet off to Monte Carlo five years after achieving their dream of becoming millionaires.

7.45 FYI Daily (HD).

7.50 Kindergarten Cop (S,HD) (1990).

Concluded. ●●●

Sky Sports 1

6.00 Premier League Highlights (HD). 10.00 The Sunday Supplement (HD). Reviewing the latest football stories. 11.00 Goals on Sunday (HD). A review of Saturday’s football action. 1.00 Live Nissan Super Sunday (HD).

Tottenham Hotspur v Stoke City (Kick-off 1.30pm). 3.45 Live EFL Cup Final (HD). Manchester United v Southampton (Kick-off 4.30pm).

Live EFL Cup Final, 3.45pm

7.00 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD).

7.30 Live La Liga Football (HD). Villarreal v Real Madrid (Kick-off 7.45pm).

10.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

8/20. Joe is injured during a bull run.

10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

15/22. Peter decides to become a member of the paparazzi.

9.00 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (S). Coulson plots a break-in at a high-security prison to discover the secret that is haunting his team, while Robbie fights to keep the Ghost Rider under control.

RADIO

12.15 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD).

1.15 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD).

2.20 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD).

3.10 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (R,S). 3.55 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD).

Omnibus. Problems arise between Ste and Harry.

Radio 1 6.00am Dev. 10.00 The Matt Edmondson Show. 1.00pm Alice Levine.

4.00 Cel Spellman. 6.00 Radio 1’s Most Played. 7.00 Rock Show with Daniel P Carter. 10.00 Phil Taggart. 1.00am Monki. 4.00 Adele Roberts.

Radio 2 5.00am Radio 2 Playlist: Easy.

6.00 The Sunday Hour. 7.00 Good Morning Sunday with Jason Mohammad. 9.00 Steve Wright’s Sunday Love Songs. 11.00 The Michael Ball Show. 1.00pm Elaine Paige on Sunday. 3.00 Johnnie Walker’s Sounds of the 70s. 5.00 Paul O’Grady. 7.00 Claudia on Sunday. 9.00 Clare Teal.

11.00 Don Black. Midnight Sounds of the 60s. 2.00 Radio 2’s Blues Playlist.

10.00 Premier League Highlights (HD).

Tottenham Hotspur v Stoke City.

10.30 EFL Cup Final (HD).

Manchester United v Southampton. Action from the showpiece match at Wembley Stadium.

11.00 MacGyver (R,S,HD).

3/22. The team heads to Malaysia to extract a terrorist group’s financier.

11.00 The Thick of It (S). 3/7. 11.30 Goals on Sunday (HD).

Peter reluctantly attends A review of Saturday’s a weekend seminar with football action.

Stewart.

11.40 The Thick of It (S). 4/7.

12.00 The Force: Essex (R,HD).

1.00 Air Ambulance ER (R,S,HD).

2.00 Arrow (R,S,HD). 2.50 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 3.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 4.15 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 4.45 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 5.15 Road Wars (R,S,HD).

12.20 Limmy’s Show. Dee Dee is astounded by the wonders of Teletext. 1.00 Limmy’s Show.

1.40 House of Fools (S). 2.20 House of Fools (S). 2.50 jam. 3.15 French and Saunders (S). Jerry Hall guest stars. 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

3.00 Radio 2 Playlists: Pop Ballads. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Upbeat.

Radio 3 7.00am Breakfast. 9.00 News.

9.03 Sunday Morning with James Jolly.

Noon Private Passions. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 The Early Music Show. 3.00 Choral Evensong. 4.00 The Choir. 5.00 The Listening Service. 5.30 Words and Music. 6.45 Sunday Feature: John Ruskin’s Eurythmic Girls. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 9.00 Drama on 3: Oedipus the King. 10.45 Early Music Late. 11.45 From the New World. 12.30am Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Bells on Sunday. 5.45 Profile. 6.00

News Headlines. 6.05 Something Understood. 6.35 On Your Farm: A Journey Through the British Isles and Beyond. 6.57 Weather. 7.00 News.

7.00 Sunday Papers. 7.10 Sunday. 7.55 Radio 4 Appeal. 7.57 Weather. 8.00 News. 8.00 Sunday Papers. 8.10 Sunday Worship. 8.48 A Point of View.

8.58 Tweet of the Day. 9.00 Broadcasting House. 10.00 The Archers.

11.15 Desert Island Discs. Noon News.

12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Just a Minute. 12.30 The Food Programme. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World This Weekend. 1.30 Fry’s English Delight. 2.00 Gardeners’ Question Time. 2.45 The Listening Project. 3.00

Film4

BBC4

11.00 The Colditz Story (HD) (1954). ●●●●● 1.00 Percy Jackson & the Lightning Thief (HD) (2010). ●●● 3.15 Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World (HD) (2011). ●● 4.55 12 Angry Men (HD) (1957). ●●●●●

6.50 The Three Musketeers (HD) (2011). ●●● 9.00 GI Joe: Retaliation (HD) (2013). An elite military team battles a terrorist organisation that has replaced the US president with an imposter.

Action adventure sequel, with Dwayne Johnson and Bruce Willis. ●● 11.10 Killing Them Softly (HD) (2012). A Mob hitman is sent to kill two petty crooks, but jeopardises the job. Crime thriller, starring Brad Pitt and Ray Liotta. ●●●

7.00 Sound of Song (R,HD). Neil Brand recreates famous recording sessions.

8.00 South Downs: England’s Mountains Green (R,HD).

Exploring the UK’s newest National Park – the South Downs.

9.00 Two Days, One Night (HD) (2014). Premiere.

Drama, starring Marion Cotillard. ●●●● 10.30 Hockney (HD) (2014).

Documentary exploring the career of acclaimed artist David Hockney.

The film incorporates previously unseen home movies and photographs. ●●● 12.15 Treasures of the Louvre (R,HD). 1.45 Order and Disorder with Jim Al-Khalili (R,HD). 2.45 South Downs: England’s Mountains Green (R,HD).

9.10 Not Going Out (S). 4/6.

Lee agrees to give Kate driving lessons.

9.50 Not Going Out (S). 5/6.

Kate and Lee take in a lodger.

10.25 Not Going Out (S). 6/6.

10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 10.00 Red (S,HD) (2010).

Lee gets a job.

(HD). 9/24. Callen’s A retired CIA agent father Garrison is found survives an assassination in the hospital room of attempt, and reunites an NCIS patient during a his old hit squad to find radiation poisoning out who wants them case, and Callen must dead. Action thriller, take him to the starring Bruce Willis and boatshed for Morgan Freeman. ●●● interrogation.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

9/22. Peter runs his father-in-law’s company.

11.30 American Dad! (R,S).

6/7. S 11.55 American Dad! (R,S).

7/7.

12.30 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). 12.55 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). Cleveland takes a struggling rapper under his wing.

1.25 Ibiza Weekender (R,S,HD).

David finds out what happened while he was off sick. 2.15 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

5.45 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).

9.00 Hawaii Five-0 (HD).

9/25. The team investigates the murder of a conspiracy theorist who apparently had compelling evidence that John F Kennedy’s cabinet ordered his assassination.

Two criminals kidnap the wife of a corrupt tycoon, only to discover he is not willing to pay their ransom demand.

Comedy, with Jennifer Aniston and Mos Def.

1.00 The Running Man (HD) (1987). ●●●

8.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

7/22. Principal Skinner introduces a unique incentive to make pupils behave.

8.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

3/22.

9.00 Ibiza Weekender (S,HD). David finds out what happened while he was off sick, Imogen decides to tell her boyfriend that she kissed another man, and Jordan and Laura create tension for their friends.

SUNDAY

LIFE OF CRIME 10pm, BBC2

News. 3.02 Drama: Ann Veronica. 4.00 Open Book. 4.30 Poetry Please. 5.00 File on 4. 5.40 Profile. 5.54 Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.15 Pick of the Week.

7.00 The Archers. 7.15 Guilt Trip. 7.45 Bottle Man. 8.00 Feedback. 8.30 Last Word. 9.00 Money Box. 9.26 Radio 4 Appeal. 9.30 Analysis. 10.00 The Westminster Hour. With Carolyn Quinn 11.00 The Film Programme. 11.30 Something Understood. Midnight News and Weather. 12.15 Thinking Allowed. 12.45 Bells on Sunday. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Radio 5 Live 5.00am 5 Live Science.

GL, March 9, 2017

12.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 1.00 EFL Cup Final (HD).

Manchester United v Southampton.

2.00 Goals on Sunday (HD). 3.00 Premier League Highlights (HD).

3.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). 4.30 Premier League Highlights (HD).

5.00 EFL Cup Final (HD).

6.00 Sunday Breakfast. 9.00 SportsWeek. 10.00 Pienaar’s Politics.

11.00 5 Live Investigates. Noon 5 Live Sport. 12.15 MOTD2 Extra. 1.00 5 Live Sport. 1.30 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2016-17. 3.30 5 Live Sport.

4.30 5 Live Sport: EFL Cup Football 2016-17. 6.30 6-0-6. 8.30 Oscars 2017 Preview. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. 1.00am Up All Night.

Classic FM 7.00am Aled Jones. 10.00 Bill Turnbull. 1.00pm Alexander Armstrong. 3.00 Charlotte Green. 5.00 The Classic FM Chart. 7.00 David Mellor.

9.00 Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Classical Music. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

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EPW-E01-S1

THE EFL CUP FINAL HIGHLIGHTS: FOOTBALL ON 5 8.15pm, Channel 5

THE GOOD KARMA HOSPITAL 9pm, ITV

BROADCHURCH 9pm, ITV

TV PICKS

DI Alec Hardy and DS Ellie Miller are called in to investigate a serious sexual assault. The return of the crime drama, starring David Tennant and Olivia Colman.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD). 11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD).

12.15 Bargain Hunt (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD).

2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

THE 2,000,000 CALORIE BUFFET 10pm, Channel 4

The concept of an all-you-can-eat buffet is thought to have originated in Las Vegas, but they are now a growing phenomenon on this side of the Atlantic too, but who benefits from such an approach – the customers or the restaurants desperate to pull in the punters? We’re about to find out courtesy of this documentary.

BBC2

6.30 Wanted Down Under Revisited (R,S).

7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: The Great Interior Design Challenge (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Women’s Six Nations Highlights (R,S,HD).

1.30 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 2.00 Landward (S,HD). 2.30 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 3.30 Africa (R,S,HD).

4.25 A Place to Call Home (S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

MEET THE LORDS 9pm, BBC2

New series. Documentary filmed ove`r a year following life at the House of Lords, one of Britain’s oldest, most idiosyncratic and most important institutions, going behind-the-scenes.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD).

12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). With Jeremy Kyle. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom.

3.00 The Home Game (S). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard. 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

THE NIGHTLY SHOW WITH DAVID WALLIAMS 10pm, ITV

New series. Entertainment show featuring a mix of topical monologues, studio games, celebrity guests, stand-up and video clips that will be presented by a rotating panel of hosts, who each sit in the hot seat for a week. David Walliams is the inaugural host.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S).

12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD).

12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD). 1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (R,S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (R,S,HD). 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS (R,S,HD). 3.15 Film: A Father’s Denial (S,HD) (2016). Premiere. Drama, starring Brady Smith. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD).

5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD). Dee fears that she has pushed Toadie away.

A Place to Call Home, 4.25pm

The Kyle Files, 8pm

Inside Britain’s Airports, 8pm

Ice Road Chaos: Winter … 8pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD).

6.30 Regional News (S).

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 2/22.

Halloween-inspired stories.

6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). The grieving Nightingales prepare for a funeral.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD).

Billie’s web of lies begins to unravel.

6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD).

Presented by Matt Baker and Michelle Ackerley.

7.30 Regional Programme (S).

Followed by Regional News.

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). Quiz show, hosted by Jeremy Vine.

6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 6/10. Part two of two. Michael Portillo goes on a high-speed boat trip.

7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD).

1/10. Anita Manning and Raj Bisra compete in the challenge set out on a road trip to seek out bargains, travelling through East Anglia.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Laurel seeks solace in Marlon’s arms.

7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD).

Anna tells Sally that Rosie is a drugs mule.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 The Cars That Made Britain Great (R,S,HD). Jodie Kidd extols the virtues of the Jaguar E-Type, which she believes has lost none of its appeal.

Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

8.00 EastEnders (S,HD). Keegan tells Shakil he is going to get revenge on Bex for her recent actions.

8.30 Life in Immigration Town – Panorama (S,HD). The impact of migrants on Slough, Berkshire.

8.00 University Challenge (S,HD).

31/37. The quarter-final matches continue.

8.30 Mary Berry Everyday (S,HD).

See Choices Above.

8.00 The Kyle Files (S,HD). 1/6. New series. Jeremy Kyle returns to tackle more high-profile issues, beginning with obesity.

8.30 Coronation Street (S,HD).

Sally is shocked when Rosie admits her career is in tatters.

8.00 Inside Britain’s Airports: Channel 4 Dispatches (S,HD).

Harry Wallop investigates how airports make money from passengers.

8.30 Food Unwrapped (S,HD).

Matt Tebbutt learns why slicing onions makes people cry.

8.00 Ice Road Chaos: Winter Road Rescue (S,HD). Traffic officers rush to a serious incident in which a car hangs precariously above a motorway, and a recovery specialist deals with a car abandoned by its driver.

Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

9.00 Catching the Abusers: A Crimewatch Special (S,HD).

See Choices Above.

9.00 Meet the Lords (S,HD). 1/3.

New series. Documentary following life at the House of Lords, going behind-the-scenes during a turbulent year that has seen dramatic changes in the political landscape.

9.00 Broadchurch (S,HD). 1/8. See Choices Above.

9.00 999: What’s Your Emergency? (S,HD). A look at the challenges facing Cheshire’s police custody teams. Officers deal with a homeless ex-serviceman arrested following a complaint about his behaviour in a cinema.

9.00 The Railways That Built Britain with Chris Tarrant (S,HD). 3/3. Chris examines the devastating impact of the Beeching report and reveals how a sleek new locomotive not only saved the railway network, but reshaped the country. Last in the series.

▼

6 7 8 9

Match of the Day 2, 10.45pm

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD).

10.30 Regional News (S).

10.45 Match of the Day 2 (S,HD).

Mark Chapman presents highlights of the latest Premier League action.

10.00 Cradle to Grave (R,S,HD). 3/8.

The world is changing for Spud as the docks face closure.

10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 1/40.

See Choices Above.

10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 The 2,000,000 Calorie Buffet (S,HD). See Choices Above.

10.00 From Paris with Love (S,HD) (2010). See Choices Above. ●●●

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

11.30 Regional Programme (R,S,HD).

11.10 Weather (S,HD).

11.15 The Secrets of Your Food (R,S,HD). 1/3. The physics, chemistry and biology hidden inside various foods.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

11.15 The Cube (R,S,HD). 4/6. Game show, hosted by Phillip Schofield.

11.00 Britain’s Benefit Tenants (R,S,HD). 2/3. A letting agent becomes caught between a single mother and her landlord.

11.50 War (S,HD) (2007). Martial arts thriller, starring Jet Li and Jason Statham. ●●

▼

EPW-E01-S1

MONDAY

12.20 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.25 BBC News (S,HD).

12.15 Incredible Medicine: Dr Weston’s Casebook (R,S,HD). Surgeon Gabriel Weston uncovers the workings of the human body. 1.15 Sign Zone: Countryfile (R,S). 2.10 Sign Zone: Who Do You Think You Are? (R,S). 3.10 Sign Zone: Royal Recipes (R,S). 3.55 This Is BBC Two (S,HD).

Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). 12.40 Jackpot247.

Interactive gaming. 3.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.05 Has Political Correctness Gone Mad? (R,S,HD). Writer and broadcaster Trevor Phillips argues against liberalism.

1.00 Walking the Nile (R,S,HD). 1.55 Escape to the Wild (R,S,HD). 2.50 Lagos to London: Britain’s New Super-Rich (R,S,HD). 3.45 Building the Dream (S,HD).

4.40 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.05 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD).

1.30 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 The Week We Went Wild (S,HD). A woman hopes five days in the jungle will teach her son a few life lessons.

4.00 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.20 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). A man with tattoos of all of his ex-girlfriends. 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

10 11 after

12

GL, March 9, 2017

ITV2 6.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes?

(R,S,HD). 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.30 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD). 11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 12.55 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD).

5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

Jeremy Vine and Tina Daheley present an edition focusing on tackling child abuse, featuring a report on Operation Hydrant – the national police operation tasked with bringing perpetrators to justice. Specialist detectives reveal how they investigate these cases.

E4

Sky1

6.10 Made in Chelsea: South of France (R,S,HD). 7.00 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S).

1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD).

4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

New series. The food writer and former Great British Bake Off judge celebrates the everyday food and ingredients she has always loved, from hearty and wholesome ideas to dishes that are a little bit more indulgent.

CATCHING THE ABUSERS: A CRIMEWATCH SPECIAL 9pm, BBC1

AS ABOVE, SO BELOW 9pm, Film4

Premiere. Archaeologists fall victim to strange forces preying on their dark secrets. Horror, with Perdita Weeks and Ben Feldman.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S,HD). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD).

12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD).

1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). The Trotters finally strike gold. 12.40 My Family (S).

Janey’s baby is due. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 4.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

Sky Sports 1 9.00 Premier League Years (S,HD).

11.00 Football’s Greatest Teams (S,HD). 11.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). 12.30 Premier League Highlights (HD). 1.00 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD). 1.30 Football’s Greatest Teams (S,HD). 2.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 2.30 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD). 3.00 EFL Cup Final (HD).

4.00 Premier League Highlights (HD).

4.30 EFL Cup Final (HD). 5.30 Premier League Highlights (HD).

The Great Indoors, 9.30pm

Mission: Impossible, 8pm

The Blacklist, 10.45pm

Gavin & Stacey, 8pm

Live Football, 7pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 15/23.

6.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 16/23.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24.

6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 13/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 5/16.

Fry helps Zoidberg.

6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

4/13. Homer pawns the TV.

6.00 My Family (S). 6/13.

Janey’s baby is due.

6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 7/10.

6.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (S,HD). Highlights of Saturday’s show.

6.30 Haye v Bellew: The Gloves Are Off (HD).

7.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 17/23.

Featuring bad manners and baby animals.

7.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 18/23.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD).

Neeta is thrown when Grace calls and asks her to bring Curtis to her.

7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD). New series.

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

2/13. Bart is hailed as a child genius.

7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

6/13. A musician befriends Lisa.

7.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 8/10.

Daddy loses control while dressed as a spaceman.

7.00 Live Monday Night Football (HD). Leicester City v Liverpool (Kick-off 8.00pm). Coverage of the Premier League encounter.

8.00 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 21/24. Zoey and her daughter move in with Walden.

8.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 22/24. Alan is visited by Charlie’s ghost.

8.00 Mission: Impossible (S,HD) (1996). A secret agent is accused of betraying his fellow spies. Action thriller based on the 1960s TV series, with Tom Cruise and Jon Voight. ●●●●

8.00 Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (HD) (2002). Sci-fi prequel, with Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen. ●●●

8.00 Gavin & Stacey (S). 4/6.

The Shipmans drive to Wales for the wedding fayre.

8.40 Gavin & Stacey (S). 5/6.

Gavin embarks on two stag nights.

9.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

16/22. Lois encourages Brian to submit a script for a TV pilot.

9.30 The Great Indoors (S,HD). 8/19. The HR department rejects a ban on inter-office dating.

10.00 American Dad! (R,S).

5/16. Part one of two.

Stan is sent to Saudi Arabia.

10.30 American Dad! (R,S).

6/16. Part two of two.

Stan settles into Saudi Arabian life.

An aide at the American embassy in Paris assists an agent’s mission to stop a terrorist. Action thriller, starring John Travolta.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 Hell Below Zero (1954). ●●● 12.50 The Great Sioux Uprising (1953). ●● 2.30 The Tall T (HD) (1957). ●●●● 4.10 Stagecoach (HD) (1966). ●●

6.35 Hugo (HD) (2011). An orphan living in the walls of a railway station in 1930s Paris uncovers a lonely shopkeeper’s mysterious past.

Family adventure, starring Asa Butterfield and Chloe Grace Moretz. ●●●●● 9.00 As Above, So Below (HD) (2014). See Choices Above. ●●● 10.50 Easy A (HD) (2010). A teenage girl lies about her non-existent sexual history.

Teen comedy, starring Emma Stone and Penn Badgley. ●●●●

12.40 The Last Exorcism Part II (HD) (2013). ●● 2.25 Of Horses and Men (HD) (2013). ●●●●

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather.

7.30 Reel History of Britain (R).

8.00 The Big Painting Challenge (R,HD). The contestants visit Whipsnade Zoo. 9.00 Britain’s Pompeii: A Village Lost in Time (R,HD).

Cameras follow the team excavating a 3,000 year-old Bronze Age village.

10.00 Dan Cruickshank and the Family That Built Gothic Britain (R,HD). The changing fortunes of the Scott family of architects.

11.00 Born Too White (R,HD).

12.00 Oceans (R,HD). 1.00 Art of China (R,HD). 2.00 Timeshift: The People’s Liners – Britain’s Lost Pleasure Fleets (R,HD).

3.00 Dan Cruickshank and the Family That Built Gothic Britain (R,HD).

9.20 The Royle Family (S).

3/6. The family argues over a television programme.

10.00 Celebs Go Dating (S,HD). 11/20. Agents Nadia and Eden host a speed-dating event to introduce civilian singletons to their celebrity clients, with Ferne McCann being swept off her feet by model Will.

GET UP

10.00 The Royle Family (S).

5/6. Barbara walks out on Jim. 10.40 The Royle Family (S).

6/6. The Royles celebrate Antony’s 18th birthday.

10.45 The Blacklist (R,HD).

11/22. Red gets wind that the US Witness Protection list is under threat from an elite organisation of female thieves, so he encourages Liz to go undercover in the gang to save it.

£10,0TO00 CASH ADV ANCE

11.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD).

11.30 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD).

12.25 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). 12.55 The Cleveland Show (R,S,HD). 1.25 The Great Indoors (R,S,HD). 1.50 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 2.15 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

5.45 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).

12.00 Monday Night Football: PreMatch (HD). 1.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 1.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD).

2.00 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 2.15 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (S,HD). 2.45 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 3.00 Monday Night Football: Pre-Match (HD).

12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.05 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 3.05 First Dates Abroad (R,S). 3.55 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.20 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.40 Charmed (R,S).

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw.

10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 Radio 1’s Specialist Chart with Phil Taggart.

10.02 Huw Stephens. 1.00am Friction. 4.00 Adele Roberts.

Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Paddy O’Connell. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Paul Jones. 8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 Johnnie Walker’s Long-Players. 11.00 David Rodigan. Midnight Johnnie Walker’s Sounds of the 70s. 2.00 Radio

12.45 Most Daring (R). 1.45 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 2.45 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 3.45 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.10 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.35 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

2’s Jazz Playlist. 3.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Great British Songbook. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Hidden Treasures.

Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven.

7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Music Matters. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. 11.00 Jazz Now. 12.30am Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today.

5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today.

9.00 Start the Week. 9.45 (LW) Daily

12.00 Peep Show (S). 12.35 Peep Show (S). 1.10 The Royle Family (S). 1.45 The Royle Family (S).

2.20 Shooting Stars (S). 2.50 Shooting Stars (S). 3.20 The Royle Family (S). The Royles celebrate Antony’s 18th birthday.

4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe.

10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 Is One Career Enough? 11.30 Chain Reaction.

Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: The Wells Way. 3.00 Brain of Britain.

3.30 The Food Programme. 4.00 Writing a New Caribbean. 4.30 Beyond Belief. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 Just a Minute.

7.00 The Archers. 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 A Small Town

Murder. 8.00 The Philosopher’s Arms. A discussion on what makes swearing offensive. Last in the series 8.30 Analysis. Part two of two. 9.00 The Rise of the Robots. Adam Rutherford investigates whether humans are ready to live alongside artificial intelligence.

Last in the series 9.30 Start the Week.

9.59 Weather. 10.00 The World Tonight. With Ritula Shah 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad.

11.00 Word of Mouth. 11.30 Today in Parliament. Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe.

12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service. 5.20 Shipping Forecast.

GL, March 9, 2017

WE’LL BUYYOURR HOUSE FORCASH!

*

11.05 First Dates Abroad (S). 11.45 The Force: Manchester 11.20 Gimme Gimme 11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

Gimme (S). 7/7. Linda Including a 32-year-old (R,S,HD). 9/10.

19/22. and Tom land new jobs. dancer who wants to Documentary following 11.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). settle down. the work of Greater 22/22.

Manchester Police.

11.55 American Dad! (R,S).

1/16. Hayley finds a new man.

RADIO

MONDAY

FROM PARIS WITH LOVE 10pm, Channel 5

Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Adrian Chiles. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport: The Monday Night Club. 8.00 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2016-17. Leicester City v Liverpool (Kickoff 8.00pm). 10.00 Flintoff, Savage and the Ping Pong Guy. 10.30 Phil Williams.

1.00am Up All Night.

Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven.

8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

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EPW-E01-S1

MARY BERRY EVERYDAY 8.30pm, BBC2

THE REPLACEMENT 9pm, BBC1

TV PICKS

A woman gets pregnant after landing a big contract for her firm of architects, but her stand-in soon starts to threaten her position. Drama, with Morven Christie.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD). 11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD).

12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD).

2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

THE SECRET CHEF 8pm, ITV

If you think you’re a great cook, you can always go on MasterChef. But if you struggle to even boil an egg, Secret Chef may be the show for you. Mel Giedroyc narrates the new series in which someone with minimal culinary skills is given five weeks to learn how to make a show-stopping, restaurant quality meal.

BBC2

6.00 The World’s Most Photographed (R,S).

6.30 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: The World’s Most Extraordinary Homes (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD).

11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 The Super League Show (S). 1.50 Countryfile (R,S,HD). 2.00 Building Dream Homes (R,S,HD). 2.30 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 3.25 Africa (R,S,HD). 4.25 A Place to Call Home (S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

1066: A YEAR TO CONQUER ENGLAND 9pm, BBC2

PLAY TO THE WHISTLE 9pm, ITV

Docudrama in which Dan Snow explores the political intrigues and family betrayals between Vikings, Anglo-Saxons and Normans that led to the Battle of Hastings.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD).

12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). Topical debate from a female perspective. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 The Home Game (S,HD). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

New series. Host Holly Willoughby and team captains Frank Lampard and Bradley Walsh are joined by Chelsea and England footballer John Terry, Paralympic gold medallist Jonnie Peacock and Countdown star Rachel Riley.

Comedians Romesh Ranganathan and Seann Walsh are on hand too.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S).

12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD).

12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD). 1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (R,S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (R,S,HD). 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 3.15 Film: Dear Diary, I Died (S,HD) (2016). Premiere.

Thriller, starring Katherine Kelly Lang. ●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Rakesh is kidnapped by an assailant.

7.30 Britain’s Busiest Motorway (S,HD). 2/6. Traffic officers are sent to deal with a 90-ton crane which has exploded.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Ice Road Chaos: Winter Road Rescue (R,S,HD). Traffic officers rush to a serious incident in which a car hangs precariously above a motorway. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD).

Raffy finds it difficult to write her father’s eulogy.

6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

Secrets of the National … 9pm

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 3/22.

6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Neeta is confused when Grace calls and asks her to bring Curtis to her.

▼

12

This Is Us, 10.35pm

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

8.00 Holby City (S,HD). 21/52. Raf enthusiastically makes plans for the future with Kim and the twins he is to be a father of.

However, his hopes and dreams look set to be dashed by a series of revelations.

8.00 Further Back in Time for Dinner (S,HD). 6/6. The Robshaw family reflect on their time travels, discovering that much of what they experienced in the past, still lives on around our dinner tables today. Last in the series.

8.00 The Secret Chef (S,HD). 1/4.

See Choices Above.

8.00 The Secret Life of the Zoo (S,HD). New series. Cameras follow animals at Chester Zoo, including Pedro the giant anteater, who is about to be reunited with his long-term partner, Bliss.

8.00 Inside Windsor Castle (S,HD).

A look back at events that shaped the monarchy between 1952 and 1972, as Prince Philip grew restless and the Queen Mother reportedly ran up debts of £7million. Followed by 5 News Update.

9.00 The Replacement (S,HD). 1/3.

See Choices Above.

9.00 1066: A Year to Conquer England (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 Play to the Whistle (S,HD).

1/6. See Choices Above.

9.00 24 Hours in A&E (S,HD). Staff and patients at St George’s talk about the importance of family support, and those in need of help include a 51-year-old decorator who has fallen from a ladder.

9.00 Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh (S,HD).

4/6. The presenter visits an 18th-century cotton mill in Cheshire, one of the world’s first factories, uncovering the stories of the child workers of the Industrial Revolution.

10.00 Inside No 9 (S,HD). 3/6.

A woman and a professor commence a battle of wits to solve a puzzle.

10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 2/40.

Entertainment show.

10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 Catastrophe (S,HD). 1/6. See Choices Above.

10.35 This Is Us (S,HD). 13/18. Jack and Rebecca agree to throw Kate, Kevin and Randall three birthday parties.

10.00 Shannon Matthews: What Happened Next (S,HD). See Choices Above.

11.10 Weather (S,HD).

11.15 Special Forces – Ultimate Hell Week (R,S,HD). 5/6. The remaining recruits are trained for an elite tactical unit of the French police.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

11.15 Unbelievable Moments Caught on Camera (R,S,HD).

2/2. Wakeboarders have a memorable encounter with dolphins.

11.30 Gogglebox (R,S,HD). The households’ opinions on recent TV.

11.05 Ian Brady: 50 Years Behind Bars (R,S,HD). Documentary examining the killer’s 50 years in prison.

12.15 Sign Zone: Our Dancing Town (R,S). Dance troupes from Barnsley, Skipton and Huddersfield take part. 1.15 Sign Zone: The Big Painting Challenge (R,S).

The contestants put their still life talents to the test. 2.15 This Is BBC Two (S,HD).

Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). Entertainment show.

12.40 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming.

3.00 Loose Women (R,HD). Topical debate from a female perspective. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.35 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S). 1.25 KOTV Boxing Weekly (S,HD). 1.55 Gillette World Sport (S). 2.25 Mobil 1 The Grid (R,S,HD). 2.50 0 to 60mph: Britain’s Fastest Kids (R,S,HD).

3.50 Kirstie’s Fill Your House for Free (R,S,HD). 4.10 Building the Dream (S,HD).

5.05 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD).

12.05 When Kids Kill: Catfish Killer (S,HD). The case of teenage karate instructor Tony Bushby. 1.00 SuperCasino.

Live interactive gaming. 3.10 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 4.00 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.20 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD).

10.30 Regional News (S). Followed

by Regional Programme.

10.45 Imagine – Maya Angelou: And Still I Rise (S,HD). A portrait of the trail-blazing activist, poet and writer, who was captured on film just before she died in 2014.

▼

▼

after

Emmerdale, 7pm

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). 52/85. Quiz show, hosted by Jeremy Vine.

6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 7/10. Part one of two. Michael Portillo travels from Athens’ port of Piraeus.

7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD).

2/10. Anita Manning breaks from shopping to visit a former silk mill with a royal connection.

7.00 The One Show (S,HD).

7.30 EastEnders (S,HD). Jane puts her foot down and calls the doctor for an appointment for Ian. Followed by Regional News.

10 11

Inside No 9, 10pm

▼

6 7 8 9

Imagine – Maya Angelou, 10.45pm 6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD).

6.30 Regional News (S).

▼

EPW-E01-S1

TUESDAY

12.20 Who Do You Think You Are? (R,S,HD). Sunetra Sarker sets out to explore her Bengali heritage. 1.20 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 1.25 BBC News (S,HD).

GL, March 9, 2017

New series. Return of the comedy written by and starring Sharon Horgan and Rob Delaney. Rob has an unexplained receipt for the morning after pill and a lot of questions for Sharon.

ITV2 6.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes?

(R,S,HD). 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.30 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD). 11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 12.55 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD).

5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

The disappearance of Shannon Matthews was a story that gripped and then appalled Britain. Nine years on, this documentary examines her kidnapping and why people close to the case believe the police should reopen their investigation.

E4

Sky1

6.10 Made in Chelsea: South of France (R,S,HD). 7.00 Game of Clones (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S).

9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD).

10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

TUESDAY

X-MEN 9pm, Film4

FILM PICK

SHANNON MATTHEWS: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT 10pm, Channel 5

Super-powered outsiders Rogue and Wolverine find themselves at a school for mutants which is run by a benevolent psychic professor. While there, they agree to join others with similar gifts to take on a superhuman mutant terrorist faction intent on establishing dominance over mankind. Sci-fi comic-book adventure, starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Anna Paquin and Halle Berry.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 7.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 My Family (S).

Susan embraces the spirit of Halloween. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S). Foggy organises a trip to the seaside.

Sky Sports 1 6.00 Football Gold (S). 7.00 WWE Smackdown Hlts (HD). 8.00 Monday Night Football: Pre-Match (HD).

9.00 Monday Night Football (HD).

9.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (S,HD). 10.00 Premier League Legends (HD). 11.00 Football Gold (S). 12.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 4.00 Monday Night Football: Pre-Match (HD). 5.00 Monday Night Football (HD). 5.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD).

Hell’s Kitchen USA, 9pm

Tattoo Fixers, 9pm

The Flash, 9pm

Fawlty Towers, 10pm

Live EFL, 7.30pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 19/23.

Camcorder clips.

6.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 20/23.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24.

6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 15/24. Howard receives shocking news.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 7/16.

Bender’s duplicate joins an important mission.

6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

7/13.

6.00 My Family (S). 8/13.

Susan embraces the spirit of Halloween.

6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 9/10.

6.00 Premier League Review (HD). A look back at recent fixtures in the Premier League.

7.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold Strikes Back!

(R,S). Comedy compilation of Harry Hill’s most off-the-wall observations.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Peri is dreading her first day back at school after Cameron’s arrest.

7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD).

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

8/13. Bart’s efforts to impress his friends backfire.

7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

9/13.

7.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 10/10.

Hyacinth’s picnic plans backfire.

7.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part Two (HD).

7.30 Live EFL (HD). Brighton & Hove Albion v Newcastle United.

8.00 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 23/24. Zoey remains sceptical about Alan’s recent health scare.

8.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 24/24. Jake makes a decision.

8.00 The Goldbergs (S).

12/24. Adam and Barry learn something new about Murray.

8.30 Black-ish (S,HD). 1/24.

New series. Dre takes his family to a theme park.

8.00 Supergirl (S,HD). 13/22.

National City comes under threat when Kara shuns a new arrival’s affections, while a disagreement further strains her relationship with Mon-El.

8.00 Only Fools and Horses (S). 5/7. Del gets a nasty surprise.

8.40 Only Fools and Horses (S). 6/7. Rodney becomes a wanted man.

9.00 Hell’s Kitchen USA (S,HD). 6/16. The contestants take part in an ingredient crossword challenge, and in another challenge, kidfriendly items must be incorporated into the dinner service during a family night.

9.00 Tattoo Fixers (S,HD).

The team meets Nicole, whose hashtagged art is raising some difficult questions, and Kiel, whose drunken holiday giraffe did not turn out as planned.

9.00 The Flash (S,HD). 13/23.

Jesse Quick informs the team that her father has been abducted, so Barry, Caitlin, Cisco and Julian voyage to Earth-2 on a mission to rescue Harry from Gorilla City.

9.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 7/7. A decorating disaster befalls the Trotters.

10.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,HD).

10.00 Plebs (R,S,HD). 3/8.

10.00 Celebs Go Dating 9/25. The team Marcus is keen to keep (S,HD). 12/20. Stephen investigates the murder his parents and Bear, Jorgie Porter, of a conspiracy theorist Delphine as far apart as Diversity’s Perri Kiely who apparently had possible. and Pussycat Doll compelling evidence Melody Thornton take 10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD). that John F Kennedy’s part in the speed-dating 21/22. Quagmire’s cabinet ordered his event in the hope of father visits Quahog. assassination. finding romance.

10.00 Fawlty Towers (S). 6/6. 10.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind Manuel’s pet rat escapes. the Ropes Part Two (HD). A look ahead to 10.50 Fawlty Towers (S). 2/6. the heavyweight bout.

Basil tries to save money on building costs.

10.30 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). Tony Bellew v BJ Flores.

11.00 Air Ambulance ER (R,S,HD). 4/6. A 16-yearold boy suffers a major head injury.

11.30 French and Saunders (S). 2/7. A spoof of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?

11.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD). A look ahead to the heavyweight bout.

11.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part Two (HD).

12.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 12.55 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 1.25 Release the Hounds: Famous & Freaked (R,S,HD). With Josh Cuthbert, Jaymi Hensley and JJ Hamblett. 2.20 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).

12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.10 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 3.00 Tattoo Fixers (R,S,HD). 3.55 The Goldbergs (R,S). 4.15 Black-ish (R,S,HD). 4.40 Charmed (R,S).

12.00 The Force: Manchester (R,S,HD). 1.00 Most Daring (R).

2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD).

3.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 4.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.30 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

12.10 Peep Show (S). 12.40 Peep Show (S). 1.15 French and Saunders (S). Kathy Burke guest stars. 1.55 French and Saunders (S). 2.30 Shooting Stars (S). 3.00 Shooting Stars (S). 3.30 French and Saunders (S). 4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

12.00 Premier League Review (HD).

1.00 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 1.15 La Liga World (HD). 1.45 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD).

2.00 Premier League Years (S). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD).

4.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD).

RADIO

11.05 Naked Attraction (R,S,HD). 3/5. A single mother and a sales advisor take part.

Radio 2 Playlist: Morning Acoustic. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Wednesday Workout.

Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven.

7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Free Thinking. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. 11.00 Late Junction. 12.30am Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today.

5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today.

8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament.

9.00 The Life Scientific. 9.30 One to

One. 9.45 (LW) Daily Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 The Whale Menopause. 11.30 Jazzed Up: How Jazz Changed Britain. Noon News.

12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 Call You and Yours.

12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here.

2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: The Mark. 3.00 Short Cuts. 3.30 Costing the Earth. 4.00 Word of Mouth. 4.30 A Good Read. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 Mark Watson Talks a Bit About Life. 7.00 The

Archers. Lynda sizes up her competition 7.15 Front Row. Kirsty Lang presents 7.45 A Small Town Murder. By Scott Cherry 8.00 File on 4. 8.40 In Touch.

Presented by Peter White 9.00 Inside Health. Dr Mark Porter separates medical fact from fiction 9.30 The Life Scientific. Geneticist Alison Woollard explains her enthusiasm for a tiny nematode worm. Last in the series 10.00 The World Tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad.

11.00 Sarah Kendall: Australian Trilogy.

New series. A Day in October. By Sarah Kendall 11.30 Today in Parliament.

Political round-up, with Susan Hulme Midnight News and Weather. 12.30

GL, March 9, 2017

BBC4

6.50 The Other Boleyn Girl (HD) (2008). A bitter rivalry develops between two sisters as they compete for the affection of King Henry VIII. Historical drama, starring Natalie Portman. ●● 9.00 X-Men (HD) (2000). See Choices Above. ●●●● 11.05 Predators (HD) (2010). Hardened fighters from across the globe are taken to an alien jungle planet to become prey in a biggame hunt. Sci-fi thriller sequel, starring Adrien Brody and Topher Grace. ●●●

1.15 Gerry (HD) (2002). ●●●

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

10/22.

11.30 American Dad! (R,S).

8/16.

11.55 American Dad! (R,S).

2/16. Stan teaches sex education.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw.

10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 BBC Radio 1 and 1Xtra’s Stories. 10.02 Huw Stephens. 1.00am Annie Nightingale.

4.00 Adele Roberts.

Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Jamie Cullum. 8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 Nemone’s Electric 90s. 11.00 Listen to the Band. Midnight Sounds of the 80s. 2.00 Radio 2’s Folk Playlist. 3.00

Film4 11.00 Great Expectations (HD) (1946). ●●●●● 1.20 Decision at Sundown (HD) (1957). ●● 2.55 Night Passage (HD) (1957). ●● 4.45 Sink the Bismarck!

(HD) (1960). ●●●●

Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service.

5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Adrian Chiles. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport. 10.30 Phil Williams. 1.00am Up All Night.

Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven.

8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather.

7.30 Weird Nature (R).

8.00 Planet Earth II (R,HD). Wildlife that inhabit the world’s grasslands.

9.00 The Secret Science of Pop (HD). Scientists and researchers analyse more than 50 years of UK chart music.

10.00 The Richest Songs in the World (R,HD).

The 10 songs that have earned the most money of all time.

11.30 Indian Hill Railways (R). The lives and loves of workers on the Nilgiri Mountain Railway.

12.30 What a Performance! Pioneers of Popular Entertainment (R,HD).

1.30 The Real Tom Thumb: History’s Smallest Superstar (R,HD). 3.00 Planet Earth II (R,HD).

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EPW-E01-S1

CATASTROPHE 10pm, Channel 4

BENIDORM 9pm, ITV

TV PICKS

New series. The package-holiday comedy returns, as the Dawsons’ holiday starts with a bang when Eddie has an accident.

Nigel Havers guest stars.

BBC1

In the event of live football being shown, the following schedule is subject to change.

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD).

11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD). 2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD).

3.00 Escape to the Country (S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

LITTLE BIG SHOTS 8pm, ITV

Dawn French presents this new series which gives a platform to some of the world’s most talented children, without forcing them to be subjected to any judges or a telephone vote. Instead, they get to have a nice, friendly chat with Dawn before showing off their incredible skills, which can range from cooking to a flair for spelling.

BBC2

6.30 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: See Hear (S,HD). 8.30 Sign Zone: Great British Railway Journeys (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 11.30 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Cash in the Attic (R,S). 1.30 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 2.00 Building Dream Homes (R,S,HD). 2.30 Channel Patrol (R,S,HD). 3.15 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 4.15 Africa (R,S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? 8pm, BBC1

UNDER LOCK AND KEY 10pm, Channel 4

The BBC news presenter Sophie Raworth traces her family tree, discovering tragic yet inspiring tales of her ancestors who risked everything to move to America.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD).

12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). With Becky Vardy. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom.

3.00 The Home Game (S). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard. 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

A special programme by the award-winning director Alison Millar, telling the stories of families whose loved ones are locked away in hospitals. This investigation into the treatment that vulnerable young people are exposed to in such institutions highlights the lack of bespoke care provided to meet their complex needs.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S).

12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD).

12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD). 1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (R,S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 The Great British Benefits Handout (R,S,HD). Lorraine starts trading on the market. 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S). 2.15 NCIS (R,S). 3.15 Film: Fatal Honeymoon (S,HD) (2012). See Choices Above. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).

Incredible Medicine … 9pm

Coronation Street, 7.30pm

Location, Location, Location, 8pm

Climbing the Property Ladder, 9pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD).

6.30 Regional News (S).

6.55 Party Political Broadcast (S,HD).

By the Conservative Party.

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

6.25 Party Political Broadcast (R,S,HD). By the Conservative Party.

6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 4/22.

6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Peri is dreading her first day back at school after Cameron’s arrest.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD). The Morgans’ secret is front page news.

6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD).

Matt Baker presents the live magazine show featuring topical reports from around the UK and big-name studio guests.

Followed by Regional News.

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). 53/85.

6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 8/10. Part two of two. Michael Portillo continues his Greek journey to Thessaloniki.

7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD).

3/10. Anita Manning and Raj Bisram conclude their trip across the South East of England.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Rakesh is held hostage.

7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD).

Chesney decides to sell Sinead’s belongings.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Sinkholes: Buried Alive (R,S).

See Choices Above. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

8.00 Who Do You Think You Are? (S,HD). 10/10. See Choices Above.

8.00 The House That £100K Built (S,HD). 2/6. Retired couple Derek and Christine from Huddersfield attempt to build their first house from scratch in the south-east of England, but the development does not go according to plan.

8.00 Little Big Shots (S). 1/6. See Choices Above.

8.00 Location, Location, Location (S,HD). Phil Spencer catches up with two pairs of house hunters, revisiting couples Jo and Ally, and Steve and Jo, to see if they managed to find the perfect home they were searching for.

8.00 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (S,HD). A young man suffering from acne visits the surgery hoping to start a new form of treatment, and a patient suffering from chronic pain seeks advice from the doctors.

Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

9.00 The Real Marigold Hotel (S,HD). 3/4. See Choices Above.

9.00 Incredible Medicine: Dr Weston’s Casebook (S,HD).

2/6. Surgeon Gabriel Weston investigates the human body’s ability to adapt for survival, meeting with individuals who push this aptitude to the absolute limit.

9.00 Benidorm (S,HD). 1/9. See Choices Above.

9.00 The Royal House of Windsor (S,HD). 2/6. This second episode reveals how Elizabeth and her father George VI kept up appearances while crises loomed on every front, as Britain suffered from crippling post-war austerity.

9.00 Climbing the Property Ladder (S). 4/6. A young woman decides to take on the challenge of renovating a property in the South Wales Valleys, pulling it apart brick by brick before putting it back together.

▼

6 7 8 9

Pointless, 5.15pm

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD).

10.30 Regional News (S). Followed

by Regional Programme.

10.45 Peter Kay’s Car Share (R,S,HD). 2/6. John and Kayleigh get to know each other a little bit better.

10.00 Mock the Week (R,S,HD). 6/13.

With Loyiso Gola, Milton Jones, Miles Jupp, Ellie Taylor and Josh Widdicombe.

10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 3/40.

A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests.

10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 Under Lock and Key (S,HD).

See Choices Above.

10.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away (R,S,HD). 5/14. Agents Paul and Steve face a moral dilemma in south London, when they find out the tenant they have been instructed to evict is on his way to a funeral.

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

11.15 Film 2017 (S,HD). Charlie Brooker reviews the X-Men blockbuster Logan.

11.45 The Big Painting Challenge (R,S,HD). 3/6. The contestants visit Whipsnade Zoo to paint the animals.

11.10 Weather (S,HD).

11.15 Dragons’ Den (R,S,HD). 16/16.

Featuring a Welsh delicacy and a new fragrance. Last in the series.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

11.15 Robson Crusoe: A Surprising Adventure (R,S). Actor and presenter Robson Green fends for himself on a desert island.

11.00 999: What’s Your Emergency? (R,S,HD).

Exploring the challenges that police custody teams face.

11.05 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords (R,S,HD). 4/13. A landlady gets a shock when she finally gains access to her property.

▼

EPW-E01-S1

WEDNESDAY

12.45 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.50 BBC News (S,HD).

12.15 1066: A Year to Conquer England (R,S,HD). Dan Snow explores events leading up to the Battle of Hastings. 1.15 Sign Zone: See Hear (R,S,HD). 1.45 Sign Zone: Trust Me, I’m a Doctor (R,S). Health advice. 2.45 Sign Zone: Royal Recipes (R,S). Food served at royal state banquets.

3.30 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests. 12.40 Jackpot247.

Interactive gaming. 3.00 1000 Heartbeats (R,S,HD). Quiz show, hosted by Vernon Kay. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.05 The 2,000,000 Calorie Buffet (R,S,HD). Documentary about all-you-caneat restaurants. 1.00 Film: The Insider (S,HD) (1999). See Choices Above. ●●●●● 3.40 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD).

4.35 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.05 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

12.05 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole (R,S,HD). People living on state welfare in Hull. 1.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Celebrity Carry on Barging (R,S,HD). 4.00 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.20 Tattoo Disasters UK (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

10 11 after

12

GL, March 9, 2017

An investigation into sinkholes, a natural phenomenon that sees the ground give away as a result of weak acid attacking the rocks below, riddling them with holes like Swiss cheese. They can occur gradually or suddenly, when the ground gives away – swallowing animals, buildings and even entire highways.

Amanda and Rustie meet a bride-to-be who invites the whole group to her Hindu wedding, so they head out to buy traditional clothing, with hilarious consequences.

ITV2 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD).

8.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold Full Throttle (R,S). 9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD).

11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes?

(R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD).

12.55 You’ve Been Framed! Gold Strikes Back! (R,S). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

E4

Sky1

6.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S).

6.10 Made in Chelsea (R,S,HD). 7.00 Game of Clones (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S).

1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD).

4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

SINKHOLES: BURIED ALIVE 7pm, Channel 5

THE INSIDER 1am, Channel 4

A tobacco company scientist blows the whistle on his employers deliberately making cigarettes more addictive. Fact-based drama, with Al Pacino.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 7.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

WEDNESDAY

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). The Antiques Roadshow arrives in Ludlow. 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 My Family (S). Ben and Susan babysit.

1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.40 The Brittas Empire (S).

4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

Sky Sports 1 6.00 Football League Gold (S,HD).

6.15 Football Gold (S). 7.00 WWE Experience (S,HD). 8.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 10.00 Live ATP Tennis (HD). 2.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 3.00 Spanish Football Gold (S,HD). 3.30 Football Gold (S).

4.00 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 4.30 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). 5.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part One (HD).

Through the Keyhole, 9pm

Timeless, 9pm

The Blacklist, 9pm

The Rebel, 9.20pm

Live SPFL Football, 7.30pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 12/26.

6.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 13/26.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 16/24.

6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 17/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 9/16.

Leela faces a difficult choice.

6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

10/13.

6.00 My Family (S). 9/13.

Ben and Susan babysit.

6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 1/7.

6.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind the Ropes Part Two (HD).

6.30 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

7.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). Comical clips, narrated by Harry Hill.

7.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S).

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Leela is horrified when she gets a threatening note in the post.

7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD).

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

11/13. Bart is sent to France on a student exchange.

7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

12/13.

7.20 Only Fools and Horses (S). 7/7. A decorating disaster befalls the Trotters.

7.00 Premier League World (S,HD).

7.30 Live SPFL Football (HD). Inverness Caledonian Thistle v Celtic (Kick-off 7.45pm).

8.00 Two and a Half Men (S). 1/23. Walden creates the perfect proposal atmosphere for Zoey’s birthday.

8.30 Two and a Half Men (S). 2/23. Zoey and Walden break up.

8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 14/24.

Sheldon’s grandmother visits Pasadena and ends up clashing with Amy. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24.

8.00 MacGyver (S,HD). 4/22.

Mac and Jack team up with a Russian bomb programmer and his estranged handler to shut down a Soviet-era nuclear warhead in Moscow.

8.00 Boomers. 1/6. Sitcom, starring Philip Jackson and Alison Steadman.

8.40 Marley’s Ghosts (S).

1/6. Marley’s ex-lover’s past comes back to haunt him.

9.00 Through the Keyhole (R,S,HD). 7/8. Keith Lemon hosts the game show in which panellists David Haye, Samia Longchambon and Dave Berry are challenged to identify the homes of the rich and famous.

9.00 Timeless (S,HD). 12/16.

Flynn travels back to 1882 and joins forces with infamous outlaw Jesse James, and Lucy, Wyatt and Rufus look to an iconic marshal to help them bring the fugitives to justice.

9.00 The Blacklist (HD).

12/22. Liz and the team hunt for an elusive killer who murders her victims with a rare and fatal disease. Meanwhile, Red’s operations come under attack and he reaches out to Tom for help.

9.20 The Rebel (S). 1/3.

A recently bereaved 70-year-old tries to make a citizen’s arrest on a thief raiding the till at his favourite charity shop.

Comedy, with Simon Callow and Anita Dobson.

10.00 Not Going Out (S). 1/8.

Tim puts the flat on the market.

10.40 Not Going Out (S). 2/8.

Lee pretends to be gay.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

11/22. Brian discovers Meg has a secret boyfriend.

11.30 American Dad! (R,S).

9/16. Francine tries to make new friends.

11.05 Supernatural (S,HD).

9/23. Sam and Dean are taken to a governmentrun detention facility.

11.00 The Force: Manchester 11.20 Peep Show (S). 3/6.

11.00 Haye v Bellew: Behind Mark needs to find a (R,S,HD). 1/10. the Ropes Part One girlfriend before his Documentary following (HD). A look ahead to birthday party. the work of Greater the heavyweight bout.

Manchester Police.

11.55 Peep Show (S). 4/6.

11.30 Haye v Bellew: Behind Jeremy’s mother and her the Ropes Part Two boyfriend pay a visit.

(HD).

12.00 American Dad! (R,S). Stan refuses to be seen with Steve.

12.35 Two and a Half Men (R,S).

1.05 Two and a Half Men (R,S).

1.30 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 2.00 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,S,HD). 2.30 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

12.05 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.35 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.00 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.05 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD). 2.55 Supernatural (R,S,HD). 3.40 Timeless (R,S,HD). 4.25 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.45 Charmed (R,S).

12.00 The Force: Manchester (R,S,HD). 1.00 Most Daring (R).

2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD).

3.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 4.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.30 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

RADIO

10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 10.00 Celebs Go Dating (R,HD). 9/24. Callen’s (S,HD). 13/20. Nadia and father Garrison is found Eden are frustrated with in the hospital room of how Stephen Bear treats an NCIS patient during a his dates, and Ferne radiation poisoning McCann keeps Lee on case, and Callen must the back burner while take him to the she explores her other boatshed for dating options. interrogation.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw.

10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 The Surgery with Gemma & Dr Radha.

10.02 Huw Stephens. 1.00am Benji B. 4.00 Adele Roberts.

Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 The Folk Show with Mark Radcliffe.

8.00 Jo Whiley. 10.00 Gretchen Peters – Sad Songs Make Me Happy. 11.00 The People’s Songs. Midnight Pick of

the Pops. 2.00 Radio 2’s Country Playlist. 3.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Relax.

4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Radio 2 Rocks.

Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 3.30 Choral Evensong.

4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Free Thinking. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. 11.00 Late Junction. 12.30am Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today.

5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today.

8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament.

9.00 Midweek. 9.45 (LW) Daily Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe.

10.00 Woman’s Hour. 10.56 The Listening Project. 11.00 Everybody Hates Me. 11.30 Simon Evans Goes to Market. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness.

12.15 You and Yours. 12.57 Weather.

1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: Baller. 3.00 Money Box Live.

3.30 Inside Health. 4.00 Thinking Allowed. 4.30 The Media Show. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30 It’s Jocelyn.

7.00 The Archers. Rex and Anisha meet

in secret 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 A Small Town Murder. By Scott Cherry 8.00 The Moral Maze. Michael Buerk chairs a debate on ethical issue 8.45 Four Thought. 9.00 Costing the Earth. 9.30 Midweek. 9.59 Weather. 10.00 The World Tonight. With Ritula Shah 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. 11.00 Tim Key’s Late Night Poetry Programme. 11.15 Helen Keen’s It Is Rocket Science. 11.30 Today in Parliament. Analysis of the day’s developments Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe.

12.45 Sailing By. 12.48 Shipping

GL, March 9, 2017

A woman goes on honeymoon to Australia, only to drown during a scuba-diving trip.

Her father is not convinced this was an accident, and begins to suspect her husband of murder. A year later, he finally finds the evidence to prove his accusation. Fact-based crime drama, starring Harvey Keitel.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 Prince Valiant (HD) (1954). ●● 1.05 Winchester ’73 (HD) (1950). ●●●● 2.55 Doctor in Distress (1963). ●● 5.05 The Gunfighter (HD) (1950). ●●●

6.50 The Secret Life of Bees (HD) (2008). ●●● 9.00 Escape Plan (HD) (2013). A security expert is incarcerated after being duped and tries to break out with the help of a fellow convict.

Thriller, with Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger. ●●● 11.15 A Time to Kill (HD) (1996).

A lawyer in Mississippi defends a black man charged with killing the racist thugs who raped his 10-yearold daughter.

Courtroom drama, with Samuel L Jackson. ●●●●

2.10 Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (HD) (1999). ●●

10.00 Plebs (R,S,HD). 4/8.

Grumio is cast to play the part of Cupid in a play.

10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

20/22. Peter, Quagmire and Joe are reunited with Cleveland.

1.00 Getting On (S). Kim tries to progress through her training. 1.40 Getting On (S). Pippa receives some good news. 2.15 Shooting Stars (S). 2.45 Shooting Stars.

3.15 Shooting Stars (S). With celebrity hairdresser Nicky Clarke.

4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

FATAL HONEYMOON 3.15pm, Channel 5

10.00 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

Memorable stoppages by both boxers.

10.30 Premier League World (S,HD). A round-up of the latest news.

12.00 Premier League World (S,HD). 12.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 1.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 2.00 Premier League Years (S,HD). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD).

5.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD). 5.30 Spanish Football Gold.

5.45 Spanish Football Gold (S,HD).

Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service.

5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Emma Barnett. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive.

7.00 5 Live Sport. Coverage of the evening’s FA Cup fifth-round replays.

10.30 Phil Williams. 1.00am Up All Night.

Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven.

8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Sam Pittis.

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather.

7.30 Reel History of Britain (R).

Melvyn Bragg explores the ‘60s.

8.00 Jet! When Britain Ruled the Skies (R,HD).

Part one of two.

Exploring advances in aviation in the 1950s and 60s.

9.00 Roots (HD).

Chicken George makes his way back to America.

Last in the series.

10.25 Wild China (R,HD). The lives of animals inhabiting the Tibetan plateau.

11.25 Imagine: Dame Shirley Bassey: The Girl from Tiger Bay (R,HD).

A celebration of Shirley Bassey’s 2009 album The Performance.

12.25 Archaeology: A Secret History (R,HD). 1.25 Treasures of Ancient Egypt (R,HD). 2.25 Wild China (R,HD). 3.20 Britain on Film: Animal Magic (R,HD).

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EPW-E01-S1

THE REAL MARIGOLD HOTEL 9pm, BBC1

PRIME SUSPECT 1973 9pm, ITV

TV PICKS

New series. Crime drama prequel following the early career of Jane Tennison, as she starts out as a probationary officer in London.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 The Housing Enforcers (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (S,HD). 11.00 Heir Hunters (S,HD). 11.45 Dom on the Spot (S,HD).

12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD).

2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

HARRY HILL’S ALIEN FUN CAPSULE 8.30pm, ITV

New series. Madcap panel show presented by the comedian, who presides over two teams nominally tasked with saving the planet from any potential alien invasion. The first episode features panellists Kathy Burke, Lorraine Kelly, Ainsley Harriott and Joe Lycett, who must find clips, people and anything that is fun or funny.

BBC2

6.30 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: An Island Parish: Anguilla (R,S).

8.30 Sign Zone: Great British Railway Journeys (R,S). 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD).

12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Cash in the Attic (R,S). 1.30 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 2.00 Building Dream Homes (R,S,HD). 2.30 Channel Patrol (R,S,HD). 3.15 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones (R,S,HD). 4.15 Africa (R,S,HD). 5.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S,HD).

A VERY BRITISH HOTEL 9pm, Channel 4 New series. Behind the scenes at London’s Mandarin Oriental Hyde Park, located in the heart of Knightsbridge and one of the world’s most exclusive hotels.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD).

12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). With guest Brian Conley. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 The Home Game (S). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard. 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

EXTREMELY BRITISH MUSLIMS 10pm, Channel 4

What is it like to be a Muslim living in Britain in the 21st century? This documentary tries to answer that question by offering viewers an insight into the lives of several members of a community living in Birmingham, where a baby boy is more like to be given the name Mohammed than any other.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S).

12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD).

12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD). 1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun (R,S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole (R,S,HD). Roma people who moved to the UK. 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS (R,S). 3.15 Film: A Date to Die For (S) (2015). Thriller, starring Victoria Pratt. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD). Amy learns that Leo could take over Lassiters.

The Great Pottery Throw … 8pm

Emmerdale, 7pm

The Supervet, 8pm

The Nightmare Neighbour … 8pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD).

6.30 Regional News (S).

6.55 Party Political Broadcast (S,HD). By the Labour Party.

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

6.25 Party Political Broadcast (S,HD). By the Labour Party.

6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5/22.

With the voice of Steve Carell.

6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Leela is horrified when she gets a threatening note in the post.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD).

Evelyn is terrified when Matt tries to tackle the blaze.

6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD).

7.30 EastEnders (S,HD). Denise is thrown into turmoil when she goes to sign the adoption consent form. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.

6.00 Eggheads (S,HD). 54/85. Quiz show.

6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 9/10. Michael Portillo ventures deep into the Black Forest in Germany.

7.00 Antiques Road Trip (S,HD).

4/10. Charles Hanson and James Braxton continue their Scottish trip, starting in Inverkeithing before heading for auctions in Dundee and Hamilton.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Lawrence changes his will.

7.30 NHS – Medical Blunders Revealed: Tonight (S,HD).

Jonathan Maitland investigates medical mistakes.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords (R,S,HD). Landlady Rachel gets a shock when she finally gains access to her property. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

6 7 8 9

EastEnders, 7.30pm

8.00 Shop Well for Less? (S,HD).

2/6. Alex Jones and Steph McGovern help sales manager Kevin and estate agent Yolanda, a shopping obsessed couple desperate to save some money for their upcoming wedding.

8.00 The Great Pottery Throw Down (S,HD). 5/8. The potters must make as many goblets as they can in 15 minutes, and Kate Malone challenges them to coil a jug to look like a piece of fruit.

8.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Ronnie is arrested.

8.30 Harry Hill’s Alien Fun Capsule (S). 1/6. See Choices Above.

8.00 The Supervet (S,HD). Professor Noel Fitzpatrick and his team fight to save the leg of a muchloved golden retriever, while, a French bulldog with twisted elbows needs a wheelchair and some surgery.

8.00 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door (S,HD). Three disputes concerning noise levels in Lancashire, Lincolnshire and Norwich, with one in particular having a violent and tragic outcome. Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

9.00 Britain on the Fiddle (S,HD).

1/3. New series. Stories from the frontline of fraud investigation, featuring a cigarette smuggler and a fraudster who has so many identities, investigators are not sure who they have under arrest.

9.00 The Attack: Terror in the UK (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 Prime Suspect 1973 (S,HD).

1/6. See Choices Above.

9.00 A Very British Hotel (S,HD).

1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 The Great British Benefits Handout (S,HD). 3/6. See Choices Above.

after

12

▼

11

10.00 MOTD: The Premier League Show (S,HD). Magazine programme featuring news and highlights.

10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (S,HD). 4/40.

A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests.

10.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

10.00 Extremely British Muslims (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

10.00 Celebrity Sex Pod (S,HD). 2/3.

Model and reality star Chloe Khan considers surgery to her vagina, while TOWIE duo Courtney Green and Chloe Meadows want to know how many sexual partners it is acceptable to have.

▼

10

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD).

10.30 Regional News (S).

10.45 Question Time (S,HD). 21/37.

Topical debate from Bedford, chaired by David Dimbleby.

11.45 This Week (S,HD). The past seven days in politics.

11.10 Weather (S,HD).

11.15 Meet the Lords (R,S,HD). 1/3.

Documentary following life at the House of Lords.

11.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

11.15 Tipping Point (R,S,HD). Game show, hosted by Ben Shephard.

11.05 24 Hours in A&E (R,S,HD).

Staff and patients talk about the importance of family support.

11.05 100 Per Cent Hotter (S,HD).

1/10. New series. Two people with extreme styles receive makeovers.

▼

EPW-E01-S1

THURSDAY

12.30 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.35 BBC News (S,HD).

12.15 Diana: Designing a Princess (R,S,HD). 12.45 Sign Zone: Life in Immigration Town – Panorama (R,S).

1.15 Sign Zone: June Brown at 90: A Walford Legend (R,S). 1.40 Sign Zone: The Real Marigold Hotel (R,S). Eight celebrities embark on an experimental adventure to India. 2.40 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.15 The Nightly Show with David Walliams (R,S,HD). A lively mix of stand-up and celebrity guests. 12.40 Jackpot247.

Interactive gaming. 3.00 NHS – Medical Blunders Revealed: Tonight (R,HD). 3.25 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). Guests air their differences.

12.05 Sex Party Secrets (R,S,HD). 1.05 Married Behind Bars (R,S,HD). 2.00 Britain’s Racist Election (R,S,HD). 2.55 Inside Britain’s Airports: Channel 4 Dispatches (R,S,HD). 3.25 The Health Detectives (R,S,HD). 3.50 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). 4.40 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 5.05 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Cruising with Jane McDonald (R,S,HD). The singer sails the River Danube on one of the most luxurious ships of its type. 4.00 Witches: A Century of Murder (R,S,HD). 4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Divine Designs (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

GL, March 9, 2017

In Romford, east London, 53-year-old selfproclaimed business entrepreneur Lorraine finds the new family dynamic a shock to the system. Now an empty-nester, she is more determined than ever to make her longedfor market stall a success.

Drama-documentary based on real-life stories from inside the UK’s counter terrorism unit, focusing on an IS-inspired terrorist group planning a firearms attack.

ITV2 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 8.30 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 9.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (R,S).

9.35 Psych (R,S,HD). 10.25 Scorpion (R,S,HD). 11.25 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (R,S,HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (R,S,HD). 12.55 Coronation Street (R,S,HD). 1.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

E4

Sky1

6.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S).

6.10 Made in Chelsea (R,S,HD). 7.00 Game of Clones (R,S,HD). 7.30 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 8.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R,S). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S).

1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD).

4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Goldbergs (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

THE GREAT BRITISH BENEFITS HANDOUT 9pm, Channel 5

THE THREE MUSKETEERS 6.50pm, Film4

A swordsman and a trio of royal guards fight to foil a plan to overthrow the king. Adventure, with Luke Evans and Milla Jovovich.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 7.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R,S). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,HD). 1.00 Hawaii Five0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). Marlene plans to renew her marriage vows with Boycie. 8.40 The Brittas Empire.

10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

12.40 My Family (S). Ben and Susan begin parenting classes. 1.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S).

2.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine (S).

Sky Sports 1 9.00 Premier League World (S,HD).

9.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD).

10.00 Premier League Years (S).

12.00 Football’s Greatest Players (S).

1.00 Great Sporting Moments (HD).

2.00 Premier League Legends (S,HD).

3.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD).

4.00 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD). 4.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.30 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

Release the Hounds ... 9pm

Gap Year, 9pm

Arrow, 9pm

Mrs Brown’s Boys, 9.20pm

Live Darts, 7pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). Unlikely insurance claims.

6.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 8/28.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 18/24.

6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 19/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 11/16.

The Professor chooses his successor.

6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

13/13.

6.00 Boomers. 1/6.

6.45 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 4/7.

Hyacinth makes expensive holiday plans.

6.00 Premier League World (S,HD). A round-up of the latest news.

6.30 Haye v Bellew: The Knockouts (HD).

7.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Harry’s Favourites (R,S). 23/26. Comedian Harry Hill presents his favourite camcorder calamities.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD).

Charlie continues to give Nancy the cold shoulder.

7.30 Game of Clones (S,HD).

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

21/22. Homer becomes a murder suspect.

7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

13/22. Grampa tries to woo a beautiful woman.

7.25 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 5/7.

Hyacinth finds a hobby for Richard.

7.00 Live Premier League Darts (HD). All the action from round five at the Westpoint Arena in Exeter.

8.00 Two and a Half Men (S). 4/23. Walden begins to feel his age.

8.30 Two and a Half Men (S). 5/23. Walden dates Rose, despite Alan’s warnings.

8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12/24. The gang hear all about one another’s Christmas adventures.

8.30 The Big Bang Theory (S,HD). 13/24.

8.00 DC’s Legends of Tomorrow (R,S,HD).

12/17. The team’s hunt for the Spear of Destiny gets tougher when they learn shards of it are being guarded in different time periods.

8.00 Fawlty Towers (S). 1/6.

In the first episode of the comedy, Basil tries to upgrade his clientele.

8.40 Fawlty Towers (S). 4/6.

Hotel inspectors throw Basil into a panic.

9.00 Release the Hounds: Famous & Freaked (S,HD). 4/7. YouTube stars Alfie Deyes, Joe Sugg and Marcus Butler enter the forest at dusk and endure a series of spooky challenges in order to win cash prizes.

Reggie Yates hosts.

9.00 Gap Year (S,HD). 2/8.

May has to go to a cousin’s wedding in Hangzhou, and Ashley insists that Greg and Dylan tag along, but the family reunion is not what any of them imagined.

9.00 Arrow (S,HD). 14/23.

China White, Cupid and Liza Warner break out of prison and head to Star City for revenge and the ACU makes a surprising arrest amid the chaos.

9.20 Mrs Brown’s Boys (S).

1/6. Agnes tries to solve Dermot’s relationship problems.

10.00 Stan Lee’s Lucky Man 10.00 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 1/10. Harry (S,HD). 14/20. Jorgie meets a mysterious Porter and James are woman wearing a now officially an item bracelet identical to his. and the agents send Return of the crime reluctant Ferne McCann drama co-created by and Pussycat Doll comic-book legend Stan Melody Thornton on Lee, starring James blind dates to see if they Nesbitt. can find true love.

10.00 Little Britain (S). 1/8.

The first ever episode.

10.40 Little Britain (S). 2/8.

David Soul guest stars.

10.00 Haye v Bellew: The Countdown Part One (HD). A look ahead to the heavyweight bout.

10.30 La Liga Show (HD).

A look ahead to forthcoming fixtures.

11.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

16/22. Lois encourages Brian to submit a script for a TV pilot.

11.30 American Dad! (R,S).

10/16. Stan and Roger exchange lives.

11.05 The Big Bang Theory 11.00 A League of Their (R,S,HD). 4/24. Penny Own (R,HD). 8/10. With arranges a date for Raj. Nicole Scherzinger, Noel Fielding and James 11.35 The Big Bang Theory Haskell.

(R,S,HD). 5/24. Sheldon’s old adversary Wil Wheaton returns.

11.20 Little Britain (S). 3/8.

Daffyd meets gay Star Trek fans.

11.00 Haye v Bellew: The Countdown Part One (HD). A look ahead to the heavyweight bout.

11.30 Sky Sports Boxing Gold (HD). Three David Haye bouts.

12.05 American Dad! (R,S). 12.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S). 12.55 Two and a Half Men (R,S). 1.25 Release the Hounds: Famous & Freaked (R,S,HD). With Alfie Deyes, Joe Sugg and Marcus Butler.

2.20 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen.

12.05 Tattoo Fixers (R,S,HD). 1.10 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 Celebrity First Dates (R,S,HD).

3.00 Gap Year (R,S,HD). 3.55 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD).

4.15 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.40 Charmed (R,S). An amorous demon kidnaps Phoebe.

12.00 Peep Show (S). 12.35 Peep Show (S). 1.05 Big School (S). Mr Gunn discovers one of the pupils could be his son. 1.45 Big School (S). 2.20 Shooting Stars. 2.50 Shooting Stars (S). 3.20 Police Squad! (S). 3.45 Police Squad!

(HD). 4.00 Home Shopping.

Armchair buys.

12.00 Betfred Super League Highlights (HD). 12.15 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD). 12.30 Premier League Darts (HD). 3.30 Premier League Match Pack (HD).

4.00 La Liga Show (HD). 4.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 5.30 Scottish Football Round-Up (HD).

RADIO

10.00 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

14/22. Lois agrees to be a surrogate mother.

10.30 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

12/22. Peter and Lois visit a psychic.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw.

10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Greg James. 7.00 MistaJam. 9.00 Radio 1’s Artist Takeover with. 10.02 BBC Radio 1’s Residency. Midnight BBC Radio 1’s Residency – Will Atkinson. 1.00 Toddla T. 4.00 Adele Roberts.

Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Bob Harris Country. 8.00 Jo Whiley.

10.00 The Radio 2 Arts Show with Jonathan Ross. Midnight The Craig

12.00 The Force: Manchester (R,S,HD). 1.00 Most Daring (R).

2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD).

3.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 4.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.30 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

Charles House Party. 2.00 Radio 2’s Tracks of My Years Playlist. 3.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Have a Great Weekend. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Feelgood Friday.

Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Beethoven. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Beethoven.

7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 Free Thinking. 10.45 The Essay: Burgess at 100. Midnight Late Junction. 12.30 Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today.

5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today.

8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament.

9.00 In Our Time. 9.45 (LW) Daily Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe.

10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 From Our Own Correspondent. 11.30 Radioactive Art. Noon News. 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 12.57 Weather. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Neither There nor Here. 2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: Inappropriate Relationships. 3.00 Ramblings. 3.27 Radio 4 Appeal. 3.30 Open Book. 4.00 The Film Programme.

4.30 BBC Inside Science. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News. 6.30

Meet David Sedaris. 7.00 The Archers.

Ruth lends an ear 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 A Small Town Murder. By Scott Cherry 8.00 The Briefing Room. 8.30 The Bottom Line.

An overview of the business world 9.00 BBC Inside Science. Presented by Adam Rutherford 9.30 In Our Time. 10.00 The World Tonight. With Ritula Shah 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. 11.00 Rashid Goes to Hollywood. Comedy by Jon Holmes and Shane Wall 11.30 Today in Parliament. Presented by Susan Hulme Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Border: Tales from the Edge of Europe. 12.48 Shipping

GL, March 9, 2017

Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service.

5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Emma Barnett. 1.00pm Afternoon Edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive.

7.00 5 Live Sport. 8.00 5 Live Sport: 5 Live Boxing. 9.00 5 Live Sport: BeSpoke. 10.00 Question Time Extra Time. 1.00am Up All Night.

Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall. 5.00 Classic FM Drive. 7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven.

8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Jane Jones.

THURSDAY

WILD TALES 9pm, Film4

Anthology of six stories in which everyday social grievances push ordinary people into an extreme course of events. Comedy drama, with Dario Grandinetti.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 The Undefeated (HD) (1969). ●● 1.20 It Came from Beneath the Sea (HD) (1954). ●●● 2.55 Harvey (HD) (1950). ●●●●● 5.00 Carry On Cabby (1963). ●●●

6.50 The Three Musketeers (HD) (2011). See Choices Above. ●●● 9.00 Wild Tales (HD) (2014). See Choices Above. ●●●● 11.20 The Lincoln Lawyer (HD) (2011). A cynical lawyer realises the rich man he is defending on a rape charge may have escaped justice for another attack in the past. Thriller, with Matthew McConaughey and Marisa Tomei. ●●●●

1.40 Me and You (HD) (2012). A teenager hides in a cellar, only for his solitude to be invaded by his drugaddicted step-sister.

Bernardo Bertolucci’s drama, with Jacopo Olmo Antinori and Tea Falco. ●●●

7.00 100 Days (HD); Weather.

7.30 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R).

8.00 Thailand: Earth’s Tropical Paradise (R,HD).

Exploring the wildlife and culture of Central Thailand.

9.00 Sound Waves: The Symphony of Physics (HD).

Singer Lesley Garrett joins presenter Dr Helen Czerski to examine sound.

10.00 Andrew Marr: My Brain And Me (R,HD). The broadcaster reveals his story of recovery from a stroke in 2013.

11.00 The Nazis: A Warning from History (R).

11.50 Fifties British War Films: Days of Glory (R,HD).

12.50 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 1.20 Sounds of the Eighties (R). 1.45 Sound of Song (R,HD). 2.45 Sound Waves: The Symphony of Physics (R,HD).

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EPW-E01-S1

THE ATTACK: TERROR IN THE UK 9pm, BBC2

TV PICKS

SCHOFIELD’S SOUTH AFRICAN ADVENTURE 8pm, ITV

New series. In the first of three programmes, Phillip Schofield and wife Steph visit South Africa.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Britain’s Home Truths (S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Wanted Down Under Revisited (S,HD). 11.45 Oxford Street Revealed (R,S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S). 1.45 Doctors (S,HD). 2.15 The Coroner (R,S,HD). 3.00 Escape to the Country (R,S,HD). 3.45 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (S,HD). 4.30 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (S,HD).

FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor

THE SECRETS OF YOUR FOOD 9pm, BBC2

Michael Mosley and James Wong reveal the physics, chemistry and biology hidden inside various foods. In the opening episode they explore how this chemistry fuels and builds bodies, with Michael sampling most people’s first meal – human breast milk, which contains important fats, vitamins and minerals.

BBC2

6.00 The World’s Most Photographed (R,S). 6.30 Wanted Down Under Revisited (R,S,HD). 7.15 The Farmers’ Country Showdown (R,S,HD). 8.00 Sign Zone: Big Dreams Small Spaces (R,S).

9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (S,HD). 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S,HD). 1.00 Coast (R,S,HD). 1.25 Beat the Brain (R,S,HD). 1.55 Landward (S,HD). 2.25 Mountain (R,S). 3.25 Africa (R,S,HD). 4.20 A Place to Call Home (S,HD). 5.15 Antiques Road Trip (R,S,HD).

TRACEY ULLMAN’S SHOW 9.30pm, BBC1

GOGGLEBOX 9pm, Channel 4

Songstress Adele compiles her latest album, while Dame Maggie has some of the best acting tips imaginable. Comedy sketches, starring Tracey Ullman.

ITV

6.00 Good Morning Britain (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S,HD). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (S,HD). 10.30 This Morning (S,HD).

12.30 Loose Women (S,HD). Topical debate from a female perspective. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Judge Rinder (S,HD). Real-life cases in a studio courtroom. 3.00 James Martin’s French Adventure (S,HD). 3.59 Regional Programme (S). 4.00 Tipping Point (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (S,HD).

The nation’s favourite armchair critics share their opinions on what they have been watching during the week as this popular series returns for its ninth run. The show secured a Bafta in 2014 and National Television Award in 2015, 2016 and 2017 and remains one of Channel 4’s biggest attractions.

Channel 4

6.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 6.45 The King of Queens (R,S). 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.05 Frasier (R,S). 10.05 Undercover Boss USA (R,S,HD). 11.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (R,S).

12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (S,HD).

12.05 A New Life in the Sun (R,S,HD).

1.05 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (R,S,HD). 2.10 Countdown (S,HD). 3.00 Fifteen To One (S,HD). 4.00 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (S,HD). 5.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).

Channel 5

6.00 Milkshake! (HD). 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD). 11.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R,S,HD). 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.15 Storm Surge: Winter Road Rescue (R,S,HD). 1.15 Home and Away (S,HD). 1.45 Neighbours (S,HD). 2.15 NCIS (R,S). 3.15 Film: Patricia Cornwell’s At Risk (S,HD) (2010). Mystery, starring Andie MacDowell. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD).

5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD). Leo is shaken by news of his father.

Eggheads, 6pm

Emmerdale, 7pm

Hollyoaks, 6.30pm

Cruising with Jane McDonald, 9pm

▼

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather (S,HD).

6.30 Regional News (S).

6.00 Eggheads (R,S,HD). 102/140.

6.30 Great Continental Railway Journeys (S,HD). 5/10. Part one of two. Michael Portillo takes a trip in a Maserati sports car.

6.00 Regional News (S); Weather.

6.30 ITV News (S); Weather.

6.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 1/22.

6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Warren calls Prince wanting to know where Shane is.

6.00 Home and Away (R,S,HD).

Heath is taken in for questioning about Gunno’s death.

6.30 5 News Tonight (S,HD).

▼

7.00 The One Show (S,HD).

7.30 A Question of Sport (R,S,HD).

With Lynsey Sharp, Andrew Johnston, JP Pietersen and Kevin Davies. Followed by Regional News.

7.00 Big Dreams Small Spaces (S,HD). 6/6. In Blackpool, Monty Don helps Alex turn her boring backyard into a magical enchanted forest. Last in the series.

7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Laurel visits Ashley at the care home.

7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD).

Michelle tells Steve that she would like to try for another baby.

7.00 Channel 4 News (S,HD).

7.00 Happy Campers: Caravanning (R,S,HD). A couple travel to a caravan site in Whitby to get married.

Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

6 7 8 9

Not Going Out, 9pm

8.00 EastEnders (S,HD). Konrad invites Shirley out for dinner.

8.30 Room 101 (S,HD). 6/9. See Choices Above.

8.00 Mastermind (S,HD). 30/31.

Five more semi-finalists compete for a place in the final.

8.30 Only Connect (S,HD). 31/37.

The Surrealists take on the Korfballers in a quarter-final match.

8.00 Schofield’s South African Adventure (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

8.30 Coronation Street (S,HD).

Aidan realises Jenny’s intentions.

8.00 Jamie and Jimmy’s Friday Night Feast (R,S,HD). 1/6.

Orlando Bloom joins hosts Jamie Oliver and Jimmy Doherty to rustle up a Moroccan tagine.

8.00 Celebrity Carry on Barging (S,HD). See Choices Above.

Followed by 5 News Update.

▼

(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition

9.00 Not Going Out (S,HD). 6/8. Lee and Lucy attend a marriage counselling session.

9.30 Tracey Ullman’s Show (S,HD).

4/6. See Choices Above.

9.00 The Secrets of Your Food (S,HD). 1/3. See Choices Above.

9.00 Piers Morgan’s Life Stories (S,HD). 4/4. Former Ukip leader Nigel Farage reflects on his life, his numerous brushes with death and achieving his ultimate political objective via the EU referendum. Last in the series. Postponed from 3 February.

9.00 Gogglebox (S,HD). See Choices Above.

9.00 Cruising with Jane McDonald (S,HD). 3/4. The singer sails the Danube on one of the most luxurious ships of its type, as she makes her first foray into the realms of the river cruise.

after

12

▼

11

10.00 QI (S,HD). 18/18. Part two of two. Highlights of the “N” series of the comedy panel game. Last in the series.

10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).

10.00 ITV News at Ten (S); Weather.

10.30 Regional News (S); Weather.

10.40 Fishing Impossible (R,S,HD).

8/10. The guys head to Laos in search of the devil catfish.

10.00 The Last Leg (S,HD). Adam Hills, Josh Widdicombe and Alex Brooker are joined by celebrity guests for a comic review of the significant moments of the past seven days.

▼

10

10.00 BBC News at Ten (S,HD).

10.25 Regional News (S). Followed

by Regional Programme.

10.35 The Graham Norton Show (S,HD). 19/20. Guests include Hugh Jackman and Patrick Stewart.

11.25 The Real Marigold Hotel (R,S,HD). 2/4. The group celebrates Amanda’s 81st birthday together.

11.00 Weather (S,HD).

11.05 Further Back in Time for Dinner (R,S,HD). 5/6. The Robshaws enter the 1940s and experience a decade dominated by war.

11.10 The Wine Show (R,S,HD). 8/14.

Matthew Goode and Matthew Rhys visit Bologna.

11.05 8 Out of 10 Cats (S,HD). 9/12.

With Gabby Logan, Ellie Simmonds, Alex Brooker and David O’Doherty.

11.55 Rude Tube (R,S,HD). 7/10.

▼

EPW-E01-S1

FRIDAY

12.25 Weather for the Week Ahead (S,HD). 12.30 BBC News (S,HD).

12.05 Terry Pratchett: Back in Black (R,S,HD). 12.55 Film: Big Jim McLain (S) (1952). Spy drama, starring John Wayne. ●● 2.20 Sign Zone: Birds of Paradise: The Ultimate Quest (R,S). 3.20 Sign Zone: The Brit Who Tried to Kill Trump (R,S). 4.05 Sign Zone: Royal Recipes (R,S).

4.50 This Is BBC Two (S,HD). Preview of upcoming programmes.

12.10 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming.

3.00 Freeze Out (R,S,HD). Quiz show, hosted by Mark Durden-Smith. 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service.

12.55 Film: Man on a Ledge (S,HD) (2012). See Choices Above. ●● 2.40 Time Crashers (R,S,HD). Celebrities experience life in different eras. 3.35 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 4.00 Four in a Bed (R,S,HD). 4.30 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (R,S,HD). Phil checks on a cluttered family home in Cheshire. 5.25 Fifteen To One (R,S,HD).

GL, March 9, 2017

10.00 The Freddie Mercury Story: Who Wants to Live Forever?

(R,S,HD). Documentary exploring two of the most important years in the Queen singer’s life, from his performance at the Live Aid concert in 1985 to his diagnosis with Aids in 1987.

12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Secrets of the Great Train Robbery (R,S,HD). Careless errors made by the thieves who famously raided a Royal Mail train on August 8, 1963. 4.00 Benefits: 26 Kids and Claiming (R,S,HD).

4.45 House Doctor (R,S). 5.10 Great Scientists (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).

Embarking upon the second of their aquatic ambles, Nigel Havers, Debbie McGee, Lorraine Chase and Simon Callow set out from Grindley Brook, England, to follow the Llangollen Canal to Wales. The trip allows them to go antique shopping in the Shropshire town of Whitchurch.

Frank Skinner invites sports presenter Gabby Logan and comedians Richard Ayoade and Alun Cochrane to express their anger over people, events and objects that upset them.

ITV2 7.15 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (R,S,HD). 8.00 Emmerdale (R,S,HD).

9.30 Ninja Warrior UK (R,S,HD).

10.30 Film: St Trinian’s (S,HD) (2007). ●●● 11.30 FYI Daily. 11.35 Film: St Trinian’s (S,HD) (2007). ●●● 12.30 Emmerdale (R,S,HD).

2.00 The Ellen DeGeneres Show (S,HD). 2.50 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S,HD). 5.00 Judge Rinder (R,S,HD).

E4

Sky1

7.30 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs (R,S,HD). 8.00 Brooklyn NineNine (R,S,HD). 9.00 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 10.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 11.00 Charmed (R,S). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 3.00 Baby Daddy (R,S,HD). 4.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,S,HD). 5.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD).

FILM PICKS

CELEBRITY CARRY ON BARGING 8pm, Channel 5

MAN ON A LEDGE 12.55am, Channel 4

An escaped convict threatens to jump from a skyscraper, while his brother carries out a plan of his own in the ensuing chaos. Thriller, with Sam Worthington.

GOLD

6.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 8.00 Monkey Life (R,S,HD). 9.00 Police Force: Australia (R). 10.00 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (R,S,HD).

12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD).

1.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 4.00 Futurama (R,S). 4.30 Modern Family (R,S,HD). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

7.00 Cheers (S). 8.00 The Green Green Grass (S). 8.40 The Brittas Empire (S). 10.00 As Time Goes By (S). 10.40 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 12.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 2.00 The Brittas Empire (S). 3.20 Last of the Summer Wine (S). 5.20 Miranda (S). Part one of two. The shop owner has two proposals to decide between.

Sky Sports 1 12.00 Football Gold (HD). 1.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD).

1.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 2.00 Premier League Legends (HD). 3.00 Football Gold (HD). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 4.30 Football’s Greatest Players (S,HD). 5.00 Premier League Match Pack (HD).

5.30 Premier League Legends (HD).

Hot Fuzz, 9pm

Men in Black II, 8.15pm

Stan Lee’s Lucky Man, 9pm

The Vicar of Dibley, 8pm

Live EFL, 7.30pm

6.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 11/23.

6.30 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold (R,S). 13/23.

6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 10/24.

6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 11/24.

6.00 Futurama (R,S). 3/16.

6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

14/25. Bart and Lisa become stranded on an island.

6.00 Miranda (S). 2/2.

6.40 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 5/10.

6.00 Premier League Match Pack (HD).

6.30 The Fantasy Football Club (HD).

7.00 100% You’ve Been Framed! (R,S). 23/23.

Harry Hill narrates a selection of viewersubmitted comical clips.

7.00 Hollyoaks (S,HD).

Drama following a group of young people in Chester.

7.30 Coach Trip: Road to Marbs (S,HD). 30/30.

7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

6/22. Lisa runs for class representative – against her best friend.

7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

6/25.

7.20 Keeping Up Appearances (S). 6/10.

Onslow’s birthday causes trouble.

7.30 Live EFL (HD).

Wolverhampton Wanderers v Birmingham City (Kick-off 7.45pm).

8.00 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 18/24.

8.30 Two and a Half Men (R,S,HD). 19/24. Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers to each other.

8.00 Rude(ish) Tube Shorts (R,S). Amusing internet videos.

8.15 Men in Black II (S,HD) (2002). Sci-fi comedy sequel, starring Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones. ●●

8.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).

Grampa discovers he is about to become a father again.

8.30 Modern Family (S,HD).

9/22. Manny and Luke put on a winter ball at the school.

8.00 The Vicar of Dibley (S).

1/8. The villagers of Dibley discover their new vicar is a woman.

8.40 The Vicar of Dibley (S).

2/2. Part two of two.

Dawn French stars in the last-ever episode.

9.00 Stan Lee’s Lucky Man (S,HD). 1/10. New series.

Harry meets a mysterious woman wearing a bracelet identical to his.

Return of the crime drama co-created by comic-book legend Stan Lee, starring James Nesbitt.

9.50 The Black Adder (S). 1/6.

Edmund’s father becomes king.

9.00 Hot Fuzz (S,HD) (2007).

A zealous policeman is relocated to a sleepy country village, where a series of grisly so-called accidents arouses his suspicions. Action comedy, starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. ●●●●

11.20 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

12/22. Peter and Lois visit a psychic.

11.50 Family Guy (R,S,HD).

5/22. Stewie discovers a pop star’s surprising secret.

11.05 Tattoo Fixers (R,S,HD). 11.00 Freddie Down Under Self-professed mummy’s (R,S,HD). 6/6. Andrew boy Lloyd asks Sketch to Flintoff and Rob Penn erase his misunderstood conclude their barbecue etching. adventure. Last in the series.

11.15 The Mighty Boosh (S).

2/6. Vince tries to impress his new punk mates.

11.55 The Mighty Boosh (S).

1/6.

11.45 Premier League Match Pack (HD). A look ahead to the next round of fixtures.

12.20 American Dad! (R,S,HD).

Stan’s father turns up. 12.50 American Dad! (R,S,HD). Roger slips into a coma. 1.15 Ibiza Weekender (R,S,HD). Jordan is forced to take charge. 2.15 Teleshopping. Home shopping.

5.45 Nightscreen. Text-based information service.

12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.05 Celebs Go Dating (R,S,HD). 2.10 First Dates Abroad (R,S). 3.05 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). 3.30 Rude Tube (R,S).

3.55 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD). 4.15 Rules of Engagement (R,S,HD).

12.35 The League of Gentlemen (S). Pauline adapts to life outside prison. 1.15 The League of Gentlemen (S). 1.55 Nathan Barley. 2.25 The Armando Iannucci Shows (R,S). 2.55 Nighty Night (S). 3.30 Getting On (S).

4.00 Home Shopping. Armchair buys.

12.15 Premier League Preview (HD). 12.45 Football Gold (S). 1.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD).

2.00 Premier League Preview (HD). 2.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 3.00 Premier League Preview (HD). 4.00 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD). 4.30 Premier League 100 Club (S,HD).

RADIO

10.35 Blackadder Goes Forth 10.15 Premier League (S). 6/6. Capt Blackadder Preview (HD). The pretends to be insane. weekend’s fixtures.

10.45 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). Paul Merson and Max Rushden host a light-hearted discussion on fantasy football issues and the weekend’s Premier League matches.

Radio 1 6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 The Official Chart with Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Greg James. 7.00 Danny Howard. 10.00 Pete Tong.

1.00am B.Traits. 4.00 Radio 1’s Essential Mix. Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz. 6.30 Chris Evans. 9.30 Ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Tony Blackburn’s Golden Hour. 8.00 Friday Night Is Music Night. 10.00 Sounds of the 80s. Midnight Huey Morgan. 3.00 Radio 2’s Funky Soul

Playlist. 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist: Today’s Top Hits.

Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 Essential Classics. Noon Composer of the Week: Gade. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In Tune. 6.30 Composer of the Week: Gade. 7.30 Radio 3 in Concert. 10.00 The Verb.

10.45 The Essay: The Other Auld Alliance. 11.00 World on 3. 1.00am Through the Night.

Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today.

5.58 Tweet of the Day. 6.00 Today.

8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament. 9.00 Desert Island Discs 9.45 (LW) Daily

Service. 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Deaths of the Poets. 10.00 Woman’s Hour. 11.00 Graffiti: Paint and Protest.

11.30 Secrets and Lattes. Noon News.

12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast. 12.04 Witness. 12.15 You and Yours. 1.00 The World at One. 1.45 The Untold.

2.00 The Archers. 2.15 Drama: Control.

3.00 Gardeners’ Question Time. 3.45 The Hitchhiker. 4.00 Last Word. 4.30 Feedback. 4.55 The Listening Project.

5.00 PM. 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast.

5.57 Weather. 6.00 Six O’Clock News.

6.30 The News Quiz. 7.00 The Archers.

Justin is over the moon 7.15 Front Row. Arts programme 7.45 44 Scotland Street By Alexander McCall Smith. Last

in the series 8.00 Any Questions? From Edwinstree Middle School in Hertfordshire 8.50 A Point of View.

Reflections on a topical issue 9.00 Against the Grain. Parts 1-5 10.00 The World Tonight. With James Coomarasamy 10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Underground Railroad. By Colson Whitehead 11.00 Late Night Woman’s Hour. Lively conversation 11.30 Today in Parliament. Mark D’Arcy reports from Westminster 11.55 The Listening Project. Two writers who find publishers’ expectations can place limits on creativity Midnight News and Weather. 12.30 Book of the Week: Deaths of the Poets. 12.48 Shipping

GL, March 9, 2017

A woman and her daughter offend the moral code of a French village when they open a chocolate shop during Lent. Drama, with Juliette Binoche.

Film4

BBC4

11.00 Thunder Island (1963). ●● 12.20 Doctor in Distress (1963). ●● 2.30 Winchester ’73 (HD) (1950). ●●●● 4.20 The Undefeated (HD) (1969). ●●

6.40 Chocolat (HD) (2000). See Choices Above. ●●●● 9.00 The Guest (HD) (2014). A couple invite an old friend of their dead son to stay with them, but begin to wonder if he is what he appears to be.

Thriller, starring Dan Stevens and Maika Monroe. ●●●● 11.05 Red Eye (HD) (2005). A hotelier on a flight to Miami realises a passenger she has befriended is intent on involving her in a political assassination.

Thriller, with Rachel McAdams. ●●●

12.45 Lesson of Evil (HD) (2012). ●●●●

10.00 The Blacklist (R,HD).

10.00 Celebs Go Dating 11/22. Red gets wind (S,HD). 10/20. Events that the US Witness take a dramatic turn for Protection list is under the worse on Melody threat from an elite Thornton and Ferne organisation of female McCann’s double date thieves, so he when Ferne is suddenly encourages Liz to go taken ill. undercover in the gang to save it.

12.00 A League of Their Own (R,HD). 1.00 Most Daring (R). 2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 3.00 Stop, Search, Seize (R,S,HD). 4.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 4.30 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.00 RSPCA Animal Rescue (R,S). 5.30 Futurama (R,S).

FRIDAY

CHOCOLAT 6.40pm, Film4

Forecast. 1.00 As BBC World Service.

5.20 Shipping Forecast.

Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 Wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily with Sam Walker. 1.00pm The Friday Sports Panel. 2.00 Kermode and Mayo’s Film Review. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport: The Friday Football Social. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. 1.00am Up All Night.

Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast. 9.00 John Suchet. 1.00pm Bill Turnbull. 5.00 Classic FM Drive.

7.00 Smooth Classics at Seven. 8.00 The Full Works Concert. 10.00 Smooth Classics. 1.00am Katie Breathwick.

4.00 Jane Jones.

7.00 World News Today (HD) 7.30 Top of the Pops: 1983.

8.00 The Good Old Days (R).

8.40 Sounds of the Seventies (R).

8.50 Sounds of the 60s (R).

9.00 Queen: From Rags to Rhapsody (R,HD).

Documentary following the band’s early years.

9.55 Queen: The Legendary 1975 Concert (R). A performance by the rock band.

11.00 Even More Guitar Heroes at the BBC (R).

Performances by Status Quo, the Who and Dire Straits.

12.00 When Albums Ruled the World (R,HD).

1.25 Top of the Pops: 1983 (R). 2.00 Queen: From Rags to Rhapsody (R,HD). 3.00 Even More Guitar Heroes at the BBC (R).

GET UP

£10,0TO00 CASH ADV ANCE

WE’LL BUYYOURR HOUSE FORCASH!

*

Timescale to suit - in as little as 7 days All property types in any condition Best price paid!

Rated

On Feefo.co m

Call us for FREE to get a same day cash offer

0800 031 9094 Buying houses for 77 years

MoveAnyHouse.com *On exchange of contracts

EPW-E01-S1

ROOM 101 8.30pm, BBC1

BOOKS

Shelf portraits A LINE MADE BY WALKING BY SARA BAUME is published in hardback by William Heinemann, priced £12.99 (ebook £9.49).

Sara Baume’s work does not rely on narrative. Her writing flourishes because instead of depending on plot devices, it takes time to thoroughly explore the minds of its protagonists.

Her first work, Spill Summer Falter Wither, focused on the mind of a man who socialised predominately with his dog. Her second, A Line Made By Walking, focuses on that of Frankie, a young artist who, failing to master city life, retreats to her deceased grandmother’s bungalow in the countryside.

Whilst there, Frankie finds her days pass her by, achieving very little, but eventually she begins to seek comfort and artistic inspiration in the nature that surrounds her.

Baume’s sophomore effort is a masterclass in the power of prose.

Frankie’s depression and insecurities unfold in the most three-dimensional of ways. They do not feel like plot devices, but instead permeate the novel as they do life. A brilliant work that will likely resonate with anyone who’s ever felt a little lost in their twenties and beyond.

9/10

BY SAM PRINCE

CITY OF FRIENDS BY JOANNA TROLLOPE is published in hardback by Mantle, priced £18.99 (ebook £7.12).

Emotional turmoil - often hidden beneath a facade of brave faces and stiff-upper-lip normality - is among the trademarks of Joanna Trollope’s contemporary work, whether it’s affairs of the heart, family issues, bereavement, betrayal and a variety of social dilemmas.

Her 20th novel centres on four ambitious female friends who have shared joys and heartache since university and are now nearing their fifties and in high-flying careers. But the dynamics of the group change when one of them is sacked and there follows a series of complications arising from betrayals, interwoven through both their professional and private lives, which threaten the future

of the friendships. Told in chapters focusing on each of the four protagonists individually, Trollope’s work cleverly tackles contemporary issues and raises the age-old question: can women have it all?

Her observations are as astute as ever, as female friendships, tricky teenagers, fractured families, elderly relatives and workplace issues are all thrown into the mix.

She makes an excellent case for the viewpoint that having an enjoyable job can save a woman’s sanity.

8/10

BY HANNAH STEPHENSON

UNDER THE ALMOND TREE

BY LAURA MCVEIGH is published in hardback by Two Roads, priced £17.99 (ebook £11.99).

“We don’t choose the stories we tell,” writes Laura McVeigh in Under The Almond Tree’s afterword, “they choose us.” The story that has chosen this Irish-born Londoner concerns a family of Afghani refugees fleeing the wreckage of their country following the Taliban’s uprising.

Seen from the viewpoint of Samar, a young girl with a passion for Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina, they eventually find sanctuary in two cabins of the Trans-Siberian Express, travelling back and forward on the line, making a home of perpetual movement. In her former work, McVeigh was Executive Director of PEN International, and her belief in the power of literature to transform lives shines through.

A novel look at displacement and belonging, and of how we make sense of the world through story, it falls short through McVeigh never quite managing to believably bridge the gap between her own world and Samar’s.

5/10

BY ADAM WEYMOUTH)

FELIX THE RAILWAY CAT BY KATE MOORE is published in hardback by Michael Joseph, priced £12.99 (ebook £9.49).

Cover-based book-judgers rejoice: here we have a cat, in a railway porter’s hat. Felix is the Huddersfield station’s Senior Pest Controller, and Kate Moore’s account of her Facebook-fuelled rise to international stardom

GL, March 9, 2017

expands on this photo in high spirits and good faith, with royalties supporting a national cancer charity. Felix’s arrival as an objectively ado rable kitten and subsequent winning over of staff and passengers is a success story of treats, pigeons and extensive napping for cat and reader alike, the lives of those lucky enough to serve alongside her forming an inoffensive backdrop of human highs and lows, captured through railway’s agreeably rose-tinted lenses.

Hearts may or may not be warmed: train nostalgists can reminisce of an era when station mogs were not uncommon (and passengers weren’t called ‘customers’) while the rest of us might marvel at how potently social media and photos of cats unite the masses, gently sedating us against the next post down... Go with the cover on this one in complete confidence.

5/10

MICHAEL ANDERSON

CHILDREN’S BOOK OF THE WEEK: I DON’T WANT CURLY HAIR BY LAURA ELLEN ANDERSON is published in paperback by Bloomsbury, priced £6.99 (ebook £4.68).

All girls (and let’s face it, most boys too) grow up with bits they don’t like. For me, like the corkscrewbonced narrator in Lauren Ellen Anderson’s charming new picture book, it was my curly hair.

“It’s messy and silly and just plain UNFAIR!” she moans, adding the mantra for all curlytops around the world: “I want my hair STRAIGHT. I want my hair... smooth. I want it to flow through the air when I move.”

So she tries everything - books, balloons, sticky tape - to tame her frizzy locks, before meeting a straight-haired girl, who (guess what?) wants BIG hair. And together, the new friends discover they actually have more fun when they like their hair. Anderson’s cute and brilliantly funny illustrations make our protagonist bounce off the page and at it’s core, is a message of learning to accept our looks, however old we are.

8/10

BY KATE WHITING)

GL, March 9, 2017

GL, March 9, 2017