10
ELIGIBLE INDEPENDENT SINGLES
5
Things We Emphatically Endorse
THE EVOLUTION OF GAY LOVE My Favorite Couples Share Their Truths
Reinvent Your Life
Volume 2 Issue 1 DBQMAG.COM Follow Us @DBQMAG Photography by Troy Mattison
What i s t he s i gn of a good deci si o n? ®
It’s working with a financial company that understands your unique needs. Same-sex couples need to take special steps to ensure a sound financial strategy. From insurance to retirement WestPoint Financial Group, a general agency of MassMutual can help you protect what matters most - your loved one’s future. MassMutual is a proud member of the Human Rights Campaign’s Business Coalition for Tax Equity and a strong supporter of the Tax Equity for Health Plan Beneficiaries Act. And we’re ready to help all couples reach their financial goals. Experience the strength of a good decision. Visit MassMutual.com or talk to a local MassMutual representative today.
Clinton Gruettert Financial Services Professional WestPoint Financial Group 900 East 96th Street, Suite 300 Indianapolis, IN 46240 317-469-6369 cgruettert@financialguide.com www.westpointfinancialgroup.com
Life insurance + retirement/401(k) PLan services + DisabiLity income insurance + Long term care insurance + annuities
MassMutual Financial Group refers to Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance Company (MassMutual), its affiliated companies and sales representatives. Insurance products issued by MassMutual, Springfield, MA 01111 and its subsidiaries, C.M. Life Insurance Company and MML Bay State Life Insurance Company, Enfield, CT 06082. 1www.hrc.org. Human Rights Campaign rating is for calendar years 2007 – 2010. CRN201301-143173
I
t's Spring, it’s a new year, it’s a beautiful opportunity to refresh ourselves and reinvent our lives. The weather is warm, and we are all feeling ourselves in many different ways. Valentine’s Day is over, but we all are still singing Whitney Houston jams, because we will always love her, which is why this issue is dedicate to her, and the love she brought into our lives with the sound of her voice. Don't you remember when she sang that song "All the Man That I Need"... my my my... Speaking of men, we have some of the most eligible bachelors and bachelorettes in the country in this issue. We, also, have a review of women who made us proud gays 2011. You must check out "The Evolution of Gay Love", where my favorite couples share their stories and their truths. There are many new sections this issue like "The Love List" and our new entertainment page by our newest editor Matthew Barrett, who shares the things this season that made his world round. It's a new season people, feel great, love yourself, and fall in love if you want, but most of all spring forward, love is in the air!
Here We Go! DaShawn Usher is a native New Yorker. He focuses most of his time and talents in Public Relations, health and nonprofit sector. His passion is creative writing. He is managing editor at DBQ.
CONT RIBU TORS Shamara Lee is Fashion Editor of DBQ Magazine. She loves, lives and breaths fashion. Shamara has a passion for styling and producing fashion shows. She studies Journalism at IUPUI in Indianapolis, Indiana.
Aryka Randall is a 25 year old biracial blogger that was raised in San Diego California and currently resides in Louisiana. Her passion for writing has taken her on a journey she will never forget. Aryka's long term goal is to unify a wide range of people through one common interest. A passion for communication.
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Matthew Is an actor, singer, blogger, activist living in New York. For the past three years he has been a part of the hit web series ADTV. You can watch The Matthew Barrett Show on YouTube.
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Editor-In-Chief / Publisher David A. Bridgeforth Jr. Senior Editor/ Executive Administrator Jacqui Tanner Contributing Editor Stanley Bennett Clay Editor at large/ Copy Editor Dashawn Usher Women Editor Summer Burks Fashion Editor Shamara Lee
Entertainment Editor Matthew Barrett Makeup Joseph Garçon Hair Martel Guinyard Photography Troy Mattison Retouch Kevin Smith Troy Mattison Editorial Assistant Kiara Peterson Videographer Terence Pleasent
DBQ Magazine is a nationally distributed quarterly lifestyle publication. published and printed in Indianapolis, Indiana. For more information on advertisement, circulation, or articles please visit us at www.DBQMAG.com Or call 317.500.4327 or 908.656.6218.
Page 4
DBQ SPRING David Bridgeforth Quarterly
2012
EVERYWHERE ABOVE THE RAINBOW
6. Behind the Scene 7. NEWS/ The Year of the Woman 8. The World According to Matthew 9. Healthy Relationships 11. Spring/Summer Style 12. 10 Eligible Independent Singles 15. BEAUTY/ The Ultimate Red Lip 16. The Evolution of Gay Love 21. BOOKS/ Chulito 22. The Love List / FIVE THINGS WE EMPHATICALLY ENDORSE 23. LESBIANS/ Girls Play 25. What I've Come To Know / Reinvent Your Life TWEET US @DBQMAG Page 5
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Behind the Scene 1 2 3
4 1. David Bridgeforth with makeup artist Joseph Garçon in Washington, DC during Spring Cover/Promotional shoot. 2. DB with his mother Jill in Indianapolis, Indiana receiving the coveted 'Media Award 2011' from the Indiana Minority AIDS Coalition for DBQ's work in HIV/ AIDS awareness and prevention. 3. DB and Patrik Ian Polk in New Orleans, Jan 2012 after screening his new ďŹ lm "The Skinny". 4. DB in Washington, DC in Jan 2012, after being inducted into the Hall of Fame of the International Federation of Black Prides.
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Page 6
NEWS The Year Of The Woman
Rebecca Arellano and Haleigh Adams- Remember the wonderful couple who was crowned Homecoming King and Queen this past year at Patrick Henry High School is San Diego? They were amazing and their story resonated with a number of lesbian youth.
In 2011 the girls ran the world. Here we review the headlines, news worthy ladies, and those who made us a proud LGBT Community. Contributing Lesbian Editor : Aryka Randell (@thefabfemme) • Leisha Hailey- She made an impact in the year 2011 by sharing her story with fans via Twitter after her and her girlfriend were thrown off of a Southwest Airline flight for kissing. • Zach Wahls- He gave a heartfelt speech about having two lesbian moms and what an amazing upbringing he had as a child. • Sam McGinnis- Sam made headlines by doing a live Drag King show on an episode of Real World San Diego this past year. • Lesbian Sailors share first kiss publically- Marissa Gaeta and Citalic Snell shared their first PUBLIC kiss after the US Oak Hill returned from sea in December. • DADT is repealed- Don’t Ask Don’t Tell was repealed allowing lesbian women all over the world to serve openly in the military.
Portia Degeneres- Portia changed her name to Degeneres this year making her marriage to Ellen official.
Joe Calderone- Lady Gagas famous alter ego Joe Calderone made an impact with the Lesbian community this year by performing at the MTV VMA award show and showing the boys that anything they can do, girls can do better!
Gay Marriage becomes legal in NYC. Gay marriage passed in NYC allowing lesbians across New York to wed and live their lives to the fullest.
Page 7
Cynthia Nixon- Cynthia Nixon affectionately known as “Miranda” from Sex and the City had a baby with her longtime girlfriend Christine
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Alisha Brennon- Alisha won a six figure settlement after her long time girlfriend, Christina Santiago was killed during a stage collapse at a concert in Indiana.
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
THE WORLD ACCORDING TO
Mat!ew
DBQ's Entertainment editor shares what he's crazy about this quarter. I can't stop watching...
I'm suddenly nuts about...
Absolutely Fabulous. I started watching absolutely fabulous in the 90s and it remains one my all-time favorite shows...So, I was extremely ecstatic when I found out that it was coming back. Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley are two of the funniest women to ever live. Recently I purchased the Complete DVD collection for the third time and since then it's been an Ab Fab marathon. Catch new and old episode of Absolutely Fabulous on Logo or BBC
Phyllis Hyman, Nancy Wilson and Norman Connors. Even though I grew up on these greats and a fan for quite some time now. I find myself being obsessed with their music as of recently. In heavy rotation Phyllis Hyman - Prime of my Life, Nancy Wilson - Love, Nancy, and Norman Connors - This Is Your life.
Best find...
The best thing I ate...
For more of Matthew follow him on twitter @LambByMatthew
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Being vegan gluten-free makes it almost impossible to eat cupcakes, but when I heard about Babycakes NYC I had to try. Babycakes offers allnatural, organic, refined sugar free and delicious alternatives free from the common allergens: wheat, gluten, dairy, casein, and eggs. I know you are thinking nasty and that they taste like cardboard, but you would be surprised these cupcakes are absolutely moist, delicious and will satisfy anyones sweet tooth. If you live or ever visit New York City Los Angeles or Orlando you must try Babycakes!
14th a dynamite duo from London consisting of Tracey Duodu and Tom Barber they have been honing their craft for a few years now, putting on enthralling shows across London and producing songs that are as stunning as they are haunting. Natural bias aside, what sets apart 14th is their hands on approach. Songwriting, composition, production and even video editing is done themselves and unlike the spawn of self-propelled YouTube stars, 14th are anything but amateur. They’re currently unsigned, but it won’t be long till they’re rightfully scooped up.
My new favorite motto... "We all have the
right to make our own choices, but we don't have the right to choose how others react to those choices."
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Page 8
Healthy
Civil union couples did not differ on any measure from same-sex couples who were not in civil unions. Compared with heterosexual married
Relationships
participants, both types of same-sex couples reported greater relationship quality, compatibility, and intimacy and lower levels of conflict.** Some have reported a greater number of non-monogamous
Written by Kyle Henderson, Kari Haecker and Janet N. Arno, M.D. Edited by Jacqui Tanner
or “open” sexual relationships among MSM couples which increases the risk of disease transmission. Another study cited four factors which contribute to the increased likelihood of male same-sex couples to be in an open relationship: age, length of relationship, being HIV serodiscordant, and “normative” masculinity, that is behaving in a way that society views as manly. The good news is that although older men are more likely to have multiple partners, they are less likely to use unsafe sex practices according to the article. Increased likelihood of un-
O
safe sex practices and STD transmission have been associated with partnerships where one partner is HIV positive or shows “normative” masculinity.*** Whatever your role in your relationship, you need to discuss the terms and boundaries of your relation- ship with health in ver-representation of African American MSM (men
who have sex with men) in HIV and STI cases is cause for major concern to the public health system. The visibility of the same-sex couple has dramatically increased. In large part, this is because samesex marriage has been a focal point of many current political debates. Increasingly states are either passing laws that permit or that ban same-sex marriage. Despite the increased visibility and discussion there remains a substantial gap in our understanding of same-sex relationships, how they develop, and how they thrive. This lack of knowledge results from a lack of research in this area and may contribute to health disparities amongst MSM, bisexual and lesbian populations. The fact remains, from a public health standpoint, we do not know how to best support mental and physical health issues in same sex populations. We really need to because MSM still continues to account for well over one half of new HIV and Syphilis cases. Even if HIV can be controlled with medications, the economic burden, and limitations on choices can be large. These facts place a heavier burden upon the shoulders of MSM populations to be proactive about their health. Keeping practices as they are is not working to prevent disease transmission and HIV seroconversion. One step in promoting physical health is likely to be supporting mental health and that may be a place for better understanding and supporting of relationships among same-sex couples. Studies have shown same-sex relationships were similar to heterosexual relationships in most ways. The first study compared committed gay male and committed lesbian couples with dating, engaged heterosexual couples and older married heterosexual couples. They found similar levels of satisfaction and positive interactions in a survey and in a laboratory exercise.* In the second study, researchers followed male and female same-sex couples with civil unions, male and female same-sex couples not in civil unions, and heterosexual married couples from Vermont over a period of three years after legalization of same sex marriage there.
Page 9
mind. Yours and their sex practices could have far reaching implications for you if you are not proactive about your health. A good step in becoming proactive about your health is to get tested for HIV and all STI’s before engaging in any sexual activity. We know that’s not always how things go down, but it is an important step. If someone is exposed to HIV or Syphilis, it can take up to 90 days for that to show up on a test, which is why it’s important to get tested at the beginning of the relationship, as well as about 3 months in to the relationship. Having a STI can make you more susceptible to contracting HIV. Another good proactive step is to be honest and open with your partner. Talk with your partner about getting tested, your sexual history, and your drug usage history. All of these factors can help both of you make better decisions. On the other hand, it is also possible to have a relationship where one person is HIV+ and the other is negative. Being vigilant about safe sex can keep the negative partner negative. If you and your partner are both HIV positive, it is still smart to practice safe sex. Unsafe sex could expose you to other STIs, and these diseases can be more serious in people who have HIV, especially Syphilis. You could also become reinfected with a different strain of HIV that might be resistant to current HIV medicines. It Is al- ways best to talk with your healthcare provider about safer sex. So remember, open communication is the key in any relationship. Being honest with your partner can help the sexual health of both of you. Getting tested regularly is a best-practice. STD’s remain a health disparity among men who have sex with men, African-American and Latino. Be forever vigilant!
*Developmental Psychology in 2008, researchers from the University of Illinois, Champaign-Urbana **Developmental Psychology in 2008, investigators from the University of Vermont, the University of Washington, and San Diego State University ***Published by Wheldon and Pathak in the Journal of Sex Research 2010.
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
STYLE T
Spring/Summer
LOOKS
his year’s spring looks are all about putting a modern spin on classic styles. There are several different outfits you can create based off patterns, color hues, fabric and eras. Don’t be afraid to be daring this season, just about anything goes.
Shamara Lee, Fashion Editor @TH3BombDotCom
Multicolored beach top [Forever 21] (Orange bathing suit top-H&M)
White bathing suit top [Target] Black and white shorts [Forever 21]
Red Linen pants [Forever 21]
Suede Wedge Shoe [Bakers]
Sperry Top-Siders [Underground Station]
Floppy hat: New York vintage boutique
-This is a great outfit to wear on the beach or just to lounge around in. The Sperry’s add a slight sporty feel to this casual look.
-This outfit is 50’s chic. These high-waisted shorts with gold militarian buttons are a great classic edition to your spring wardrobe.
Red Polo button up [Macy’s]
Plaid green and salmon pink button up [The Gap]
Yellow fitted shorts [John’s Bay]
Salmon pink cargo shorts [John’s Bay] Dark brown Sperry TopSiders [Macy’s]
Dark Brown Sperry Top-Siders [Macy’s]
Brown belt [Macy’s]
This is an excellent example of how men can add color to their spring wardrobe. It’s all about color blocking this warm weather season.
Page 11
The plaid shirt compliments the shorts nicely. The warm colors embody spring and showcase another alternative of wearing bright colors.
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Our Most Eligible SINGLES
Name: Brian Nieh Age: 24 Birthday: November 23 Nationality: Puerto Rican & Chinese Location: New York City Height: 5’9 Weight: 147 It’s very rare that you would find a sexy and humble 24 year old that is single.
The Independents Editor: DaShawn Usher
But there’s Brian Nieh, who is very easy
Name: Brandon Lee
to talk to and a SpongeBob loving
Age: 22
independent model based in New York
Birthday: January 6
City. He would’ve gone “straight” for
Nationality: See below
Angelina Jolie, but as Brian best sums it
Hometown: Honolulu, Hawaii
up “she’s kind of old now. So now it
Location: Murfreesboro, TN
would be Jessica Alba.” But don’t worry
Height: 5’11
guys, he’s still on our team ;)
Weight: 160 Brandon is a 22 year old high-energy lovable Hawaiian-Chinese-JapaneseKorean-Guamanian located in Tennessee. Although he’s far from a southern bell, he definitely has a southern charm. He believes the purpose of a relationship is “finding that person who understands you for who you are, and being able to connect and communicate with that person on a Warm and bubbly is a great way to
Age: 25
describe Chanel. Her
Birthday: May 4
modest side, was so
Nationality: Black
sweet, but even the
Height: 5’4
sweetest of the
Weight: 124
bunch have a little
Location:
wild side. Not afraid
Indianapolis, IN
to express herself,
Chanel wants you to
Name: Chanel
level that no one else can understand.”
Daria Polenova ©
Name: Ja’Nina Walker
impacting the lives of future
Age: 27
generations, especially in the
Birthday: June 24
young Black gay male
Nationality: Black
community. She best sums it
Location: Oakland, CA
up as “I’m a strong believer
Height: 5’9
in our fight to eradicate the
Weight: 147
HIV epidemic. I pretty much committed my career to
know that “just
Educated, smart, beautiful,
when I love, I love
and congenial are just a few
so hard, that it
words to describe Dr. Ja’Nina
hurts.” But that’s
Walker. Yes, at only 27,
not all you’ll want
Ja’Nina has her PhD and
to know about her.
attributes her work to
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
that.” But at 13, it was another powerful and sexy woman that caught Ja’Nina’s attention…Janet Jackson.
Page 12
Name: Zak Hill-Whilton Age: 24 Birthday: October 26 Nationality: White Location: New York, NY Height: 5’11 Weight: 150
Zak was the first person to get my Beyoncé fill in the blank lyrics correct. His easy-going and lovable personality definitely can have guys “going crazy right now.” It’s Name: A’mir Edwards
more to the pretty blue
Age: 25
eyed heartthrob that
Birthday: February 05
makes him truly
Nationality: Black Location: Towson, MD
intriguing. According to
Height: 5’9
Zak, he admires Jane
Weight: 151
Adams because “she was incredibly selfless
At 25, A’mir would best describe
and incredibly
himself as a “piece of work to deal
hardworking. She
with, but it is always a fun and loving
facilitated a lot of
experience.” It was ten years ago,
progressive changes in
when he first realized his attraction
society.” Now it’s his
to guys in gym class. Ten years later,
turn to leave his mark
Amir definitely is at that point of
in history.
knowing what he wants out of life and a partner.
Name: Mitchel Joseph Rios Age: 17
Birthday: April 19
idea of what he wants in relationship
Nationality: Mexican and Honduran
and a guy. Mitchel wants you to know
Location: Bronx, NY Height: 6’0 Weight: 133
The youngest single to make the list is Mitchel Joseph Rios. He hails from the
that he’s in school. “I go to Hostos Community College. It’s my first semester. I’m a major in Mathematics. I go to a youth program called Latino Youth In Action at Hispanic AIDS Forum in the Bronx office.”
Bronx, NY and at 17 has a pretty good
Page 13
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Name: Amiyah Scott Age: 24 Birthday: January 11 Nationality: African American, with a Creole kick Location: New Orleans, LA Height: 5’7 Weight: 140
Many people may have heard of her and some may know her, but if there’s one thing to know about Amiyah Scott it is that she’s more than a pretty face. During our interview she was totally comfortable and an open book, willing to share her thoughts and experiences. As Amiyah states, “I’m just down for positive things. As long as it’s positive I
Finley Fotos ©
wouldn’t mind being a part of it.”
Name: Derrick L. Briggs Age: 31 Birthday: December 23 Nationality: African American
He attributes this to be one of his
Hometown: Brooklyn, NY Location: New York City Height: 5’11 Weight: 188
“I’m working on a web-series, it’ll be
Insightful and funny, Derrick L.
into photographer. I’m just
Briggs may be one of the last “good
expanding my talents and going into
fellas” around. His cool demeanor
other arena’s that I haven’t gone into
proves his confidence. Last year, he
before.”
biggest joys. There’s more to come from the Briggs Empire in the future, my directorial debut coming sometime 2013. I’m also dabbling
didn’t think he’d be so in love with a special little lady, his new niece.
Read all the full interviews on our singles at DBQMAG.COM DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Page 14
BEAUTY
Kiss Me Red How To Have The Ultimate Red Lip Beauty Editor: James Knotts (@Femmeboy)
When it's time to make a timeless classy statement where lips are concerned we immediately think of red. Evoking a vintage screen goddess look is quite easy to achieve. Here are some tips to help you give Marilyn a run for her money. Prepare the Perfect Pout Gently exfoliate the lips using a standard scrub or even running your toothbrush across your lips to get rid of loose dead skin. Bold lipstick will magnify chapped, cracked lips so this step is vital.
-Gloss is an option to ďŹ nish off a red lip, try clear gloss or a true red, like Blood work by NARS. -Cruella Velvet Matte Lip Pencil from NARS
Luscious Liner Take a complimentary or similarly colored lip liner and begin to line the lips with precision. Run the liner around the edges and bring the color onto the lip a bit. This will help serve as a great base for the lipstick.
Slather on the Stick
Apply the lipstick directly from tube to the lips for basic application, but use a lip brush for the most color impact and definition.
For the bold, try Ruby Woo Matte Lipstick by MAC
Blot those Lips
Take and kiss a napkin to get rid of excess pigment. This also helps push the color into the lips for a longer lasting look. Repeat applying lipstick to the lips and your lips are lip lock ready.
Page 15
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
THE EVOLUTION OF GAY
L<3VE
Cory & Keith
RockStar
Love
When I met this couple, I could easily see their very deep connection and unconditional love for each other. Many people go a lifetime and never find someone they connect with so truly. In Cory and Keith, I found that Rock Star unconditional kind of love that after three years still abides. DBQ- How do you compare what you have done in past relationships to this relationship? Keith- I feel like it’s very sincere, its true love. Corey- I have never experience a relationship like this. I have been in previous relationships, and in every relationship you say this is the one, this time I know he is the one. I moved to different states to be with him. I moved from Georgia, Virginia, and Maryland to DC. I would never have done that for anyone. I know he is the one. DBQ- What was the moment for you? Corey- I was actually coming out of a bad relationship. I met Keith online and we started talking as friends. I really never thought of Keith like that. He would write me every morning, ‘Hi how you doing” and “How was your day”. He was taking the time
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Keith- Pretty much the same thing.
out to ask me questions like that. I went to Atlanta and found him and he didn’t look nothing like his pictures, I didn’t like his pictures on Facebook. I didn’t think he was going to be as cute as he was.
DBQ- How did the first threesome come about? Keith- Pretty much we discovered an individual that was interested, and we happen to run into each other and asked the question.
Keith- He was like you are fine. Corey- We had a good time, we spent time with each other, then he was about to leave and it really touched me. I was crying, I knew something had to be there. I knew I was in love with him. I flew to Virginia for a week we argued but we made up. Then I went on a plane back to Atlanta, like it hit me I didn’t want to be without this boy. I wanted to be with him all the time. DBQ- That’s scary. Corey- I know, and you worry all the time is he talking to someone else, because you don’t know. But he was always open up to me; I knew he was the one.
DBQ Magazine
Corey- Basically everything he said. The person was facebook both of us and we both previously had a crush on each other, I had a crush on that person a while ago. DBQ- Is their every jealousy in the threesome? Keith- No Corey- No, because we don’t care about those people. We don’t have threesome all the time. We don’t have a connection with them like we have with each other.
In a time where everyone wants to fall in love, no one seems to know what it looks like to be in it. My favorite couples, those who are doing it well, share their stories and their truths on the new form, weight, and color love is taking in 2012. What you may find, there is a familiar but different kind of love in the air.
Keith- We both have an understanding of each other.
Spring 2012
Page 16
DB: So how did you meet? Pony: Chad didn’t want to be with me, and he didn’t like me. Chad: I met pony when I was seventeen. I saw him and thought he looked too gay. (laughter) It’s the truth.. I would never date him.. Pony: Chad was the queen who worked the front of BBQ. He was cute. This was when I was starting my ball “House of Zion.” I never tried to talk to him, I just tried to tell him about the “House of Zion.” But he was like ‘I am not into that.’ He was very snobby. He never knew that I liked him because I never let him know. Then years later I started getting all of these Facebook messages from him, talking about he wanted to see me and hang out. But I wouldn’t return them. Then I bumped into him, and he was like ‘why didn’t you call and return my messages?’ DB: So what was different? Pony: I was the same; I think Chad just got older. Chad: He still looked as gay as he did back in the day, I guess I just got use to it. DB: He was still snatched. Chad: Yes he was still snatched. Pony: He had no choice. This is how I come. (Laughter). Pony: So we hung out a few times, and it started out as us just having fun.
Pony & Chad Interview by David Bridgeforth Edited by Stanley Bennett Clay Photography by Ashton Piña
A New Love
Pony Zion was the first man I interviewed for DBQ. In that interview he told us all about his hopes for love. A hopeful Chad has come.
DB: So how did you guys become an item? Pony: We just kept saying little smart remarks, and kept poking at the idea of something more. Then one night we were laid up in the bed. Chad: October 4th. DB: You better remember October 4th (laughter). Pony: (laughter) We were making out, laid up in the bed, and he stopped and looked me in my eyes, and said ‘I want to be with you.’ I was laying on top of him and I asked ‘you really want to be with me?’ And he said ‘yea I want be with you.’ That’s when it started. DB: Pony, is this how you thought it would be? In your first interview with the magazine, you told us what type of love you wanted. Have you found it? Pony: I am still figuring this out. That the interesting part of this relationship for me, because as it goes I’m surprised that it’s going; it’s going well. Even with our differences, because we are highly jealous of each other.
A Love that is Grand Page 17
DB: Who gets more jealous? Because you’re Pony Zion. Pony: I am a more jealous person than him, and the fact that I am Pony Zion doesn’t phase him like that. Chad: I am not in the world he’s in. I am not into the ball room scene; to me he is just my boyfriend. People say to me ‘Oh My God you’re dating Pony Zion!’ And I’m like ‘yeah ok.’ (Continues on Pg. 21)
Gary Bracket and Bill Hendrix have a grand love, not because their lives are extravagant, but because together through the mural love and respect for one another, they have been able to contribute something memorable to our community. In the early 1980s, Gary and several of his closest friends turned themselves into "The Bag Ladies". This funny group of performing drag queens, who traveled to raise money for HIV/AIDS. Since 1983 TBL has raised over 1 million dollars for the fight against AIDS. When I asked Gary how was he able to be the guiding force of the TBL, he replied, "I couldn't have done it without the unfailing love and support of my partner Bill." Bill and Gary met in college in 1981, they went on a date because of friends suggestion, that's where their love story starts. Bill told me that they even each other out, and add so much value to each others worlds. The 31 years of their love and commitment make them both grand to us.
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
I've know this couple for years and every time we have dinner or go out dancing, I am inspired at how hot and spicy their love is. Everything, from their beautiful home, to their love with abundance. After eight years they still rush is filled home daily just to be in each others arms. DBQ- How did you guys meet?
Derrick- We met at Talbott St, in Indianapolis, IN. He had a boyfriend, and I
told him very nice to meet you, have a good night. The next time I met him he had a boyfriend, the third time he didn’t have a boyfriend; it’s time to go
(laughing). If he had entertained me while he had a boyfriend we wouldn’t be together.
Lincoln- The next time I saw him was another 4 months, then he asked are you still dating? I said nope I’m single, then he said whoaaa let me buy you a drink, then I said you can buy me a water because you’re a stranger (laughing). We have been together ever since.
DBQ- What has your partner taught you about yourself?
Derrick-I think he has taught me to be patient, understanding, because those are the things I lack.
Lincoln- That I’m really naïve, and that I let people use me. I just assume that everybody had my best interest in mind, that everybody was a friend. He taught me how to watch out for people.
DBQ- What is the biggest tool that you used to keep your love alive?
Derrick- Communication, we talk about everything, I mean everything. That’s usually are nightly pillow talk, we talk about what happens during our day, what we think we could of changed to make us have a better day, and what we will change to make us have a better tomorrow.
Lincoln- Honesty and communication, it’s easier to say what’s on your mind then holding it back and hoping they figure it out.
Derrick & Lincoln An Abundant Love
Sammi and Sammie
told him I had a boyfriend and I pointed my boyfriend out to him.
DBQ: How long have been together? Sammi: A year. Sammie: Yes a year. DBQ: How did you both meet? Sammie: We met at a Latino club in NYC, he saw me in VIP and his eyes burst open.
Sammie & Sammi
The Sammy Boy
Love
I met the Sammy boys in a New York club and got to talking about the love and their truths. I saw things differently after, maybe you will too. DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Sammi: You don't have to say all of that. (Laughter). Sammie: It's true your eyes did get real big, and then he came over and said his name was Sammi, I was drunk and confused and thought he was being funny, because my name is Sammie.
Sammi: Sammie came over to me and was like the bartender want to have with us, he was flirting with me and giving me all these free drinks, how else you think we been drinking for free, I told him I had a boyfriend, and I pointed you out and he wants both of us. DBQ: Oh wow. Sammie: So we all met up at our place and drunk and smoked, and had the best Parley Parley ever. Sammi: Yes it was the best ever. Sammie: Ever since then if we see someone that either one of us likes and wants, we have that person together.
Sammie: We finally realized both of our names were Sam. We got drinks and went home and had the best sex ever, and the next day we had some more, and it turned into a special love affair.
Sammi: I think threesomes will save gay relationships, because we don't ever have temptation to cheat, we made room in our relationship to do whatever we both want together.
DBQ: How did the threesomes start?
DBQ: What have you learned about building trust?
Sammie: There was this bartender in the club who was flirting with me and giving me free drinks, he said he wanted to take me home, I
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Sammi: In order for you to have trust in a relationship, you must allow your partner some type of privacy.
Page 18
M
aya Angelou once said to me, “Only equals fall in love.” I never fully understood that until I met Deondray Gossett and Quincey LeNear, the Hollywood-based creators of the hit television series “The DL Chronicals.” Two still young and handsome actors, they ultimately became film making partners and have been life partners for 16 years, meeting and falling in love when they were in their early 20’s, proving that Hollywood love stories really do exist. David Bridgeforth: So how did you two meet? Deondray Gossett: I found him in a dinosaur cage, fully hatched. That’s how long it’s been. Quincy LeNear: Oh, he’s so dramatic. We met through mutual friends here in LA. I had just relocated from Chicago and one of my roommates was a screenwriter, whose writing partner was a friend of Deondray’s from college. And he would always say to me, whenever he came by the house, ‘you remind me so much of my friend from school Deondray, who’s also an actor. I think you guys would really get along.’ At the time, I was in the closet. I was even in a long distance relationship with a woman who in my mind I was going to marry and live happily straight ever after. But Deondray’s friend would always bring Deondray up in conversation. So when we did finally meet, I was literally in such a state of denial that I refused to allow myself to engage in even the thought that a guy was attracted to me. I totally had my blinders on when I met him. DG: You can say that again. QL: But I thought he was funny and talented and I was like ‘Oh great this is someone who I would get along with and could be a friend.’ But as far as any romantic notations, I didn’t recognize that he was throwing vibes, or as he says, ‘trying to make eye contact.’ But he kept me cracking up and I found myself becoming smitten with him. I found myself wandering in the direction I had told myself I shouldn’t. I think I probably, for the first time in my life, put down all of the preconceptions that I had about who it was that I’m supposed to be. I think that was the beginning for me realizing that I didn’t have to put up this exterior and maintain this persona that really wasn’t me at all.
ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL: A GLANCE INTO A 16-YEAR HOLLYWOOD LOVE AFFAIR Interview by David Bridgeforth Edited by Stanley Bennett Clay Photo by Luck VirgoPhotogaphy
DG: Now on the other side of that, I was in a relationship with a guy who I saw every three months when he would come to LA on business from Atlanta. He was actually with a woman with whom he planned on marrying. But he was telling me, that it was probably not going to go through, that he was living this lie. So he would come to L.A., get what he wanted, get quickly out of my apartment, and I wouldn’t see him for another three months. DB: So both of you emerged out of a sort of closeted experience. DG: Yes. DB: So fast forward to now. What do you find so special about your partner? DG: Quincy is my support system. I think that was the thing that attracted me to him in the first place. That’s what I didn’t find in my other relationships. What I saw and still continue to see in Quincy is that he would often consider me first, sometime before himself. I don’t know if that’s good or bad, but it’s just an honest answer. Sure we have issues, we’re not perfect. But I never ever have to question whether he has my best interest at heart. Ever. And he does it in ways that are nonverbal, ways that are verbal, ways that are nonspecific, and ways that are specific. Everything around me is so secure. So I think that’s what I like most; true, authentic support. It’s a deeper love that keeps getting deeper. QL: Oh, you’re just saying that cause you like my doggy style (laughing).
I first met the Royale's almost two years ago. As I got closer to their love, I experienced a family acceptance and a strong sense of unity among these two beautiful black women and their 15 plus Royale tribe of lesbian and gay sons and daughters. These women being married for close to ten years show me that love can create a solid space for family, freedom, and a whole lot of fun.
Page 19
DBQ Magazine
I've known of their love before they made it official and when they did I was at the wedding. That was 2 years ago in June. What I find beautiful about their love is how two resilient women can bring together the fragments of their lives. My friend Shawna and her children and Maggie and her huge heart, when those fragments met it created a loving family. Children who have the love of two moms in their home have more than they can ever imagine.
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
PORN STARS DO LOVE TOO
A
Interview by David Bridgeforth Edited by Stanley Bennett Clay
ngyl and HotRod are adult film actors; professional lovemakers. But the love they share with each other does not have a price tag.
more about this person, I also knew I wasn’t going to leave New York right away, and I spent a couple days with him. DBQ: What is special about your partner?
DBQ: Do you think your relationship is different because you’re in the adult film industry? HotRod: We have a different relationship but not a typical one. But what relationship is typical? Angyl: Our relationship is perceived a little differently because were adult film actors. Other than that it’s like any other relationship.
HotRod: I don’t trust too many people at all, but I feel I can trust him, and trust him with my emotions. I feel that he sincerely loves me. Angyl: I saw vulnerability in him that was equal to the vulnerability inside of me. I kind of sensed he had been through things that were parallel to the things I’d been through. In him I met another one-in-a-million person like me. It was the first time I found someone who completely understood me and I understood them.
DBQ: Do you guys prefer to work with each other? DBQ: What has your partner taught you about yourself? HotRod: I know Angyl does, but of course I have to work with other people because of diversity. But emotionally, I prefer to work with him. Angyl: Yeah, it’s definitely easier working with your boyfriend.
Angyl: To be considerate of other people, He taught me that I need to work on things a little bit more. I’m selfish, but that selfishness is not premeditated. I don’t realize when I’m being selfish, so I think being with him has taught me that I need to work on not being selfish.
DBQ: What makes your love special? HotRod: Our chemistry. He was the first person I met that I connected with, a weird type of connection, very special. We both do porn, so the first thing people say is HotRod’s dick is so big, Angyl is so lucky. But it’s all about the chemistry we share. Angyl: To me it’s 50/50. You have to be physically attracted of course, but that only goes so far. He pays me a lot of attention. After our first scene together he kept smiling at me, and staring at me. I knew it was something there. I felt we had good sex, even though it was for a shoot, but afterwards he kept paying me attention. I knew I wanted to know
HotRod: He taught me that I need to find new problem-solving strategies, like walking away even when I’m right. I talk a lot. I know that, and I make a lot of valid statements, but not everybody wants my advice. I fight for what I know is right, and what will create a solution and a better outcome. But he’s taught me I need to learn how to let things go. DBQ: What is the crossover point from making love to sex? Angyl: Sex was intense from day one. We fucked ‘round the clock for the first two days he was here. But it did become deeper when he came back to visit me. That’s when it really began to cross over to love.
TQ & Khari The New Lipstick Lesbians
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
I absolutely love TQ and Khari, they are like this glamorous Hollywood couple, whose fashion is dope and exudes freedom. I was first attracted to this couple, because I was amazed at how much TQ loved and treated her women like a queen. I asked her why Khari was so special to her, and she replied, "She's very loyal, honest and intelligent. She makes me feel secure, and content every time she's in my presence. We learn from each other daily. She has matured my mind, and opened me up to the world." For two years this beautiful black couple has held their love together, and that to me is glamorous.
Page 20
BOOKS
C
hulito is a beautiful, hard and well-liked fifteen-year-old Puerto Rican high school
dropout and drug-runner living in an ultra-testosterone South Bronx hood. But Chulito’s life becomes emotionally complicated by the return of his childhood best friend Carlos to the hood on summer vacation from college. Polar opposite trajectories—Carlos, having been double-promoted out of high school, is now, at seventeen, in his second year of college and will spend the summer interning at the New York Daily News; Chulito, hanging with the street life as one of the boys—has caused them to draw apart, much to Chulito’s dismay. Circumstances are further complicated by rumors that Carlos is a pato (a ‘faggot’), and his return is met with a chorus of neighborhood taunts, that, in spite of Chulito’s desire to rekindle their friendship, Chulito reluctantly joins in. Still, Chulito cannot deny what is in his heart. Time and again, he tries to express his feelings to Carlos, and those awkward, heartfelt confessions represent some of the best writing in this poignantly romantic book. They, and the secret kiss he and Carlos ultimately share will have you in gleeful tears. Still Chulito’s worlds collide as his ideas of being a young man, being macho, and being in love are challenged. But it is because of his deep affection for Carlos that Chulito ultimately faces his hostile environment, and goes from being one of the boys to being his own man.
CHULITO A novel by Charles Rice-Gonzalez (Magnus Books 275 pages) Reviewed by Stanley Bennett Clay
I was thoroughly touched by the skill, humanity and heart of Mr. Rice-Gonzalez’ writing and story-telling. With Chulito, my favorite book of 2011, he has created a character, a world, and a cause that are all worth cheering about.
(Pony and Chad Continued from page 3.) DB: What makes your love special? Chad: I forget he’s my boyfriend. He’s like my brother, but we’re screwing, I get more perks. He’s like my bestfriend. Pony: I agree with that. I’ve been in other relationship where you create this person that you should be with. We don’t have that, this is who we are, and we talk freely. There is no fakeness,. When his friends are around I call him daughter out loud in public (laughter). Pony: There is no medium; there are just extremes with us. But Chad keeps me young because I am 29 now. DB: What do you think of this new epidemic of gorgeous couples in their twenties having threesomes? Are you both open to that in your relationship? Pony: Chad just asked me that the other day. Chad: I didn’t ask to go out and do it (laughter), maybe in the future, not right now. For me I would feel threesomes would interfere with the relationship, we need to build the trust, maybe after years of marriage. Pony: I feel like our relationship would have to get to the point where we trust each other enough to tell each other that we feel like having sex with other people. But I don’t see a threesomes happening no time soon. Chad: No time in the near future. DB: What has your partner taught you about yourself? Pony: Chad helps me realize that my shit stinks. When I do things or say things that I think are right, and nobody else is going to tell me I’m wrong, Chad is going to say ‘nigga you wrong.’ I don’t know if I should say this, but when I wasn’t sure that I wanted to be with him, he was like ‘Pony, you’re a slut, You’re going to have to tie down sooner or later. You can’t do this forever. Chad: They say people come into your life for reasons. We’re each other’s reason.
Page 21
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
THE LOVE LIST
FIVE THINGS WE EMPHATICALLY ENDORSE THIS MONTH
1
Ballroom ROCKSTAR: Christian
The Royal House of Christian is the newest and hottest ballroom house on the scene. The brainchild of probably the greatest woman I've met in the ballroom scene, Dr. Ayana Christian. At her ball Feb 18th, 2012, she told me that the Christians, "...are the return of CARTA", but in my opinion, it is more than just that. The Royal House of Christian is a return of beauty, brains, and substance to ballroom. Read my extended review of that night at DBQMAG.COM -David Bridgeforth
3
the only way to describe her. She does not rap, she transcends it. Her versus act as lyrical incantations, that take her listeners on a journey so clear and vivid you’re left mesmerized and curious. “I Aint No Rapper”,which is the title of her new album was writen and produced by her which is part of the reason she was nominated for The Atlanta Hottest Award's female hip hop artist.
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
FOR MORE
2
THE SKINNY, the new feature film from writer/director Patrik-Ian Polk, tells the story of five Brown University classmates reuniting in the Big Apple for a weekend of sin and fun. Release date: April 6, 2012
Her name is Lois “LS” Lane and her title track is
5
DBQMAG.COM
4
I met Crawdford through a mutual friend over lunch in New York last month. He slid me his CD and, thereafter, in my travels I fell in love with Track 5, "No Pain No Gain." -DBQ
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
Speaking of “LOVE” this list would not be right without the essential classic of none other than Whitney Houston’s “You Give Good Love.” Even if you’re single, this song sparks emotions that makes you want to fall in love again (no matter how many times you swore to never love again). Houston’s classic tells a tale as old as time about discovering the greatest emotion of all time, love!
Page 22
LESBIANS
F
ems, studs, goldstars, bi-sexys , dykes, touch-me-nots, lezzie loo’s i.e., lady-lovin' ladies. Did I get us all? That romantic holiday has once again come and gone. The gift exchange and the passionate night are now but a faint memory. Unless you received a 92-inch flat screen you just carry on. For those who did not receive such a thing, what does one do after the chocolates have been eaten, the roses wilted, and the balloons deflated? Now, we could discuss an array of really sweet things to do to keep your lady interested. You know, placing a love note on her pillow, washing her car, or giving her a single hand-cut flower, but I’m feeling a little naughty so flowers and love notes just won’t do! I’d like to discuss a far more decadent alternative, a particular type of “sweet option” that could potentially keep giving long after any holiday. Come on girls, lean in close so you can read me well. I’m talking about a brand new sex toy. I mean really, flowers are pretty and a clean car… well that speaks for itself. But what’s better than sending your lady through the roof at any given time? I know we all feel like “we please her just right” and “all she needs is me,” but let’s spice it up a bit! Trust me we’ve tested these theories at DBQ magazine. The first order of business is to find out how your lady climaxes. This will help you decide what type of toy to purchase. It’s also important to note her favorite color. That last point may seem a bit silly based on where a toy is used, but choosing the right color can enhance her experience more. Toys provide multiple functions and come in an array of shapes and sizes. But a basic break down consists of vibrators and dildos. Vibrators vibrate and dildos do not. Rocket science, I know. For the lady who climaxes through clitoral stimulation and has very little interest in penetration, a small vibrating toy may be ideal. A great choice is the “Bullet.” This is a small vibrator that can fit in the palm of your hand. Its reverberation is quite powerful and for its size it’s very intense. If so desired, it can be placed on the clitoris and held in between the labia. Another little gem is the “Egg.” It gets its name from its egg like shape, which is a little larger than a bullet in diameter and often comes with a wired or wireless remote. The remote option allows someone else to control the intensity of the vibration and essentially the time and intensity of her partner’s orgasm. The final choice for my clitoral climaxer, and one of my personal favorites, are those sexy little vibrating panties. Vibrating panties provide discreet fun while out and about on a spring evening. Darlings, you will find that most vibrating panties also come with a remote control. I encourage you to use your imagination while at dinner or on a picnic. Some climax-craving ladies arrive at that pinnacle point via penetration. For the lady who is “all in,” a dildo or larger vibrator will compliment her beautifully. When purchasing one of these lovely accoutrements, it’s important to consider the
Page 23
GIRLS
DBQ Magazine
PLAY Make Me Vibrate By Summer Burks
following: product material, length, phallic or non-phallic, color and function. Dildos and vibes are made out of a lot of different materials. If your lady likes a softer feel, choosing a product that is made from silicon, jelly rubber or latex are nice choices. A silicon toy is very durable, hypoallergenic, and non-porous. These qualities help to cut down on bacteria formation. Silicone dildos can be sterilized by boiling them or running them through the dishwasher, yep, the dishwasher. Let me add another little happy hint to all the many uses of a dildo. For the “professional strapper,” if you purchase a dildo with a flared base, chances are it can slide nicely into your harness and will make for a great cost effective time. Okay, this is only the beginning and I’ll have more for you next time. Until then, let’s get those imaginations in gear. Spring is upon us ladies. It’s time for a little “out with the old and in with the new” action. Now make me proud!
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
What I've Come To
Know
L
ife isn't a line where you 're born, you live and
then at the end of the line you die. If you take both ends of that line and bring them together you have created a circle. Life really is a circle and in that circle you are born, you live, then you die only to be reborn into a new life. This is how I see life, it's a constant renewal of our existence here on earth. There are seasons that show up and pass away. The thing about humans is that we are the only species on earth that get to choose who we want to be during the living part of that circle. We get to fashion a person and become that person. A lion leaping through the jungle can only be that. The bald eagle flying gracefully above our wars and celebrations can only fly above as that eagle. We humans on the mot of matter get to become whoever we want in this experience called life. My experience started with me taking care of my HIV infected mother who was dying of this disease and I with my minute mind doing all I knew to urge her body back to health. Professionally, my story started at 15 where I was giving motivational speeches in high schools and churches, then to tour nationally with some of the greatest professional speakers alive such as Les Brown, Stedman Graham, Brian Tracy, and Anthony Robins. By the age of 18, I stopped touring to prepare for college. My first year I fell acutely in love with poetry thanks to Maya Angelou. She told me I was a poet after I wrote her a poem for her 81 birthday celebration at her home in North Carolina. That day when she looked me in my eyes with tears in her own I began to understand who I really was. In our lives we have these moments of truth that expose the truth of who we really are and as we evolve, change, and grow we become more full of our truest selves. At 19 I announced loudly that I was gay and volunteered for Indiana Black Pride to help make my LGBT community better. I went from being an unassertive nobody in the gay
give up who we've been and who we've known ourselves to be so well for who we can become. We must push our own capacity and tap into our own divinity, for we can be and do more with our existence. Don't forget this magazine was once a bootleg review about what I loved at drag pageants, balls, and parties and was turned into what is now a national award winning magazine. Today I spend most of my time in Washington, Indianapolis and New York City. I am assisting in the creation of an empowerment center for black gay youth for an inspiring and helpful organization in DC . DBQ is still published in the heart of indianapolis, but is now in more cities than ever. I don't eat at the same restaurants, have the same daily routine, or see the same people I did six months ago. My life and everything in it is different, including apartments in two different cities. What I've come to know is that in order to create the life we've always imagined, we must consistently reinvent our worlds. We must keep our fingers to the pulse of our destiny and be prepared to abandon all we know in order to leap off the edge of life into our unknown bliss. We must bend ourselves to progress ourselves so that the billions of breathes we've taken over our lives weren't simply wasted moments robbed from God. This very moment is your life. Take it sacredly into the palm of your hand... Mold it... Shape it... Reinvent it... And spring it forward!
world to becoming the entertainment chairman, community activist, and local television personality. I interviewed RuPaul Drag Race stars,
Tweet Me @DBRIDGEFORTH
civil right leaders, and gangster rappers while raising thousands of dollars for Indiana Black Pride, as well as turning a summer festival stage show into the hottest show of Indiana's gay summer. All of these are lives I've lived and they have changed me, but all those lives are dead and gone. I have reinvented myself, each time taking all the meaning from my past into my present. We must learn to
Page 25
DBQ Magazine
Spring 2012
DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG
Do you know?
1 in 5 people living with HIV donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know they have it.
Think you can tell which person doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know they have HIV? Scan the QR codes with your phone.
Help Help us us save save a a life. life. Help Help us us end end HIV. HIV. Donate Donate now. now. We administered more than 2,000 free and confidential HIV tests in 2011, thanks in part to our generous donors. Make a contribution online at www.damien.org/donate. www.damien.org
/thedamiencenter
@damiencenter