All-State Auditions

Thirty years ago, I think I knew I was somehow going to be a teacher. I was not expecting to be a band director. I think in my early twenties, I knew I was going to have a family someday. When I look back now though, I do not ever remember weaving those two concepts together. I think we can all agree that finding the right person to tolerate a band director’s life is unique and a challenge all unto its own. It wasn’t until my fourth year teaching that I was about to have a child of my own that I was about to shift everything I thought I knew into a whole new type of philosophy.

My daughter is now a COVID-Era sophomore. She is in my high school band program. Here are my limited nonexpert thoughts on the matter.

Let me start by saying I have absolutely no regrets about the challenge I am still sometimes dealing with on a day to day basis. From a teacher standpoint, I still have all the same challenges with my daughter that any other teacher may have. She has inherited a lot of my personality, especially my “younger personality” and habits. This is a nice way of saying, in my opinion, she’s brilliant with a hint of laziness.

From a dad perspective, I believe any parent would brag or flex about their own children. I am no different. She constantly impresses me with things that I know I could not do when I was her age. Trumpet came naturally to her, as did movement and weapon. She’s now tackling the challenge of co captain of her (my) high school color guard. Sometimes the dad and teacher combine and that’s when things get complicated.

Now, from what I know about most band parents, unless the parent was in band themselves, they could care less about whether or not their child practices at home. Their mindset, from what I can tell, is “They practice before school, during school, and after school, sectionals, all day on Saturdays, they play at rallies, games, field competitions, parades, band reviews, and the teacher wants them to practice on their own even more?” The band director’s answer is of course “YES!” The dad in me is more like “ Ugh, OK, I get it. Do some math.” That being said. My kid hardly practices but nails performance assignments and assessments. I have come to realize that being a good parent and being a good director comes with some hypocrisy. You have to be a bit of a hypocrite to make sure our students and children are able to stand on our shoulders in order to see and reach farther than we could. This means we strive for our kids to be better than us. So of course I want my kid to practice more. Of course I want her to succeed academically. Even if that means she has the same habits I grew up with. It’s up to me with both teacher eyes and parent eyes to help her avoid some of the pitfalls and bad decisions that I made.

Now I know some may say “You have got to let her fail and pick herself back up so she’ll learn.” I agree to an extent. However, I also believe the universe works. I believe that for every situation I have experienced, bad or good, it happened for a reason. What I have derived from this through the years is whenever I did not understand why something was happening to me (usually something unpleasant), I have come to believe its purpose was to help either my students or my family either avoid, adapt, or overcome a similar situation. This means owning my hypocrisy for the sake of a better outcome in my daughter and my students.

Make no mistake. This is hard. My daughter has been a band kid for her entire life. My students and recent alumni at the time were the first ones there at the hospital. She has been attending guard rehearsals to stretch and move since 7th grade. She has heard all of my sayings, all of my “isms”, knows all my catch phrases, knows all my corny jokes, knows what sets me off, and knows another side of her father the rest of the program never sees. This carries an extra weight to her high school experience as well that I am cognizant of. This was all by design, however.

As a younger director, like many, I was out to make a name for myself. I put in way too many extra hours at work. I left early and came home late. Sometimes not seeing my daughter during the hours she was awake. This carried on for some time. By the time she was old enough to realize what was going on she started to resent my chosen profession. This was tough. I’m sure those that are still reading this with similar situations in their lives can completely understand. This went on for some time. As certain uncontrollable factors entered and exited my life (i.e. administration changes, different coaches, different athletic directors, facility availability, my own seniority), I started to have more control over my work schedule and plugged back in to being a father. During this time, my daughter soon took an interest in music. She expressed an interest in being in band. My band. I was thrilled. I still am. I was willing to make this happen. This meant more time together and I wouldn’t miss out on some of her most important moments as a young adult. At the time we had to make some serious decisions. We switched her school so she could develop friendships with students her age and transition to middle and high school with them.

During her middle school years, she decided to follow her godfather’s footsteps and pick up the trumpet. Her tuba player father was heartbroken for about 30 seconds until

he realized how much money he would save. It was during this time I discovered something very important that shaped how I would spend the next crucial years with my daughter. I do not enjoy teaching my daughter music *dramatic chords*. When she was 11, I was still Daddy. Not even Dad yet. Asking for help on her instrument meant correction, critique, and, as we all know, repetition. She did not enjoy that one bit. This is where we needed to have “the talk.” It was an epiphany of sorts. It all started to make sense. Through the years I always get questions like “Why doesn’t my kid listen at home like they listen to you?” The answer became crystal clear. Because I am not their parent. I am their music teacher. My focus is much more narrow when it comes to their upbringing. Now, I was both. A student is normally supposed to have a different relationship with their music teacher than their parents. There are many shared responsibilities but it is still much different to be a teacher than a parent. We both came to find out a lot of truths from our talk. She would have to understand that “Dad” will become “Mr. Castro” when it came to music.

I know this may sound cold. But for us, it works. Now, when she asks for help I ask “Are you sure?” It’s a reminder that I’m about to switch hats. I’m about to be Mr. Castro. I’m about to give instruction. I’m about to be constructive but also may tell her things she may not like. Sometimes she’s ready for it, sometimes she says “Wait. Let me think about this real quick.” Now, as a leader in my program, she knows the unwritten rule about asking me questions. “Three before me.” She knows she can come to me regardless but she definitely makes an effort to seek out answers on her own before relying on her dad for program related questions.

There are things that are easier now that she is in my program. My wife and I don’t have to worry about who is picking her up. My wife is our best booster. She understands her schedule as a guard mom because she’s lived with it for so long at my side. Professional courtesies are available whether I use them or not. It helps knowing which teachers will gel with her personality ahead of time. My colleagues have also watched her grow up on and off campus. My boosters have been the extra aunts and uncles in my daughter’s life that I could leave her with while I dealt with an issue or both her mom and I were busy. We understand each other’s boundaries. I am now privy to her life more than most parents to their children. I do my best to not take advantage of that. I still have to let her trip and fall so she can pick herself up. I am a dad so of course I still mess that up sometimes.

There are definitely things that are more difficult as well. Perhaps more challenging is a better phrase to use. Any seasoned band director will tell you to leave work at work. Do not bring it home with you. Well we now live five minutes from campus. This presents unique challenges of its own. I used to have up to a 30-minute drive home to flush out my day, lesson plan, think about mistakes I made throughout the day, how I could have handled various interactions better, think about what went well, what could have gone better, and what to avoid doing in the future. Now, I literally bring work home with me. My car rides are considerably shorter. I can’t vent like I used to, nor can I really let my daughter know what I really thought of certain aspects of rehearsals or performances.

Regardless of the challenges, having your child in your program is really good for the soul. You can literally be there and watch your child evolve, thrive, and inspire others. I’ve seen plenty of my other students do it and now I get to see my own daughter get the chance to do it as well. After these last 18 months of distance learning, remote teaching, and losing dozens of students to moving, poor grades, and family tragedies, I can think of no one else I want by my side to help me rebuild my program.

Audition information is posted here:

https://cbda.org/all-state-ensembles/auditions/

California currently offers the opportunity to audition and participate in 15 All-State ensembles.

Collaboratively, CBDA, CODA, and CAJ offer a junior high (Grades 7-8) All-State Honor String Orchestra, two junior high (Grades 7-8) All-State Honor Bands, a junior high (Grades 7-8) All-State Jazz Band, 3 high school (Grades 9-12) All-State Honor Bands, a high school (Grades 9-12) All-State Jazz Band, a high school (grades 9-12) All-State Honor String Orchestra, and a high school (Grades 9-12) All-State Honor Full Orchestra. CAJ also offers a high school (Grades 9-12) All-State Jazz Choir. CCDA offers four All-State Choirs. All of these ensembles will rehearse and perform at the California All-State Music Education Conference in February, 2022.

2022 Scales and Audition Etudes are posted here:

Dropbox Link

Google Drive Link

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